#GOD I HATE THIS

[teaboot]

I have no illusions of what I am. I’m a rent-a-cop. A mall cop. A babysitter for adults. I’m nobody’s boss, or dictator, and most of my employed purpose is to be a scarecrow for people who think I have some kind of power or authority.

I’m not allowed to touch anyone, and I don’t want to. Im not allowed to carry a weapon of any kind, and I don’t want to. Im not allowed to chase anyone or yell at anyone, and I don’t want to. I firmly believe, one hundred percent, that the vast majority of conflicts can be handled without violence by simply talking, listening, offering resources, and keeping your own ego in check. Remaining humble and treating others as though they are doing the best they can.

I’m good at my job, and I like my job, and I like feeling like I can help people, even unpleasant or unkind or irrational people. Especially those people, because life is fucking hard when nobody is happy to see you and everyone expects the worst from you.

It’s a necessity that I cooperate with police sometimes. Arson, assaults, stuff like that. And every few months, a cop tells me I should apply to become a cop. That I’m good with ‘difficult people’ and they need extra hands.

And like

Every time, it’s a little bit tempting

I don’t want power. Being in the authority position I HAVE, as small as it is, is exhausting. I don’t like how other security guards talk about addicts and homeless people, and while the cops I’ve met aren’t as crass, I’m skeptical that the outlook on that side of the fence is any better.

But like. I’ve had friends tempted over that way, and they think they can do good from the inside, and I want to believe them

I know a single cog that ticks against the rhythm gets either ground down into shape or gets spit out in pieces, but I want to think it could alter the machine just a tiny bit, you know? If it held out long enough

I don’t believe police are vital or even NECESSARY for half the shit that goes down in this city, but like

Even here, in my two-bit nothing-ass Paul Blart career, I've helped people

Saved backpacks and shopping carts from being unloaded into the trash, helped kids and lost folks find their families, talked down violent or erratic people, responded to ODs and backed up paramedics

I’ve been able to shield kids from criminal charges, and hook people up with resources, buy people food and direct away from hazards and walk people to their cars at night and like

I don’t believe in our justice system, and I don’t trust the police, and I don’t think anything meaningful is ever accomplished through intimidation or threats of violence, and even though other guards I know DO, Im better at my job than they are, and I’m doing good here. Even if they think I’m a soft, naive, gullible loser, I’m effective. So it doesn’t matter.

So like. I keep wondering. Could I do good there, too?

And I think that’s where the devil keeps getting you

The devil keeps tempting me and what they don’t tell you about that is everyone thinks “Maybe he won’t fuck over me. Maybe I’m special”

[alien-shmalien]

i finished great god grove

[symphonypikachu]

one of the amazing ideas that @furretd0ll came up with in call after talking about the butch hartman video essay LMAO

i spent WAY too much time on this. i am so sorry everyone.

[dr-spectre]

Hey guys! I wanna share something REALLYYYYYY important with you all!!!

So, I was having a nice conversation with an editor from Inkipedia. Really friendly individual, we had a nice civil discussion and it was great to hear out their points and wiki related things. I learnt some cool things and how Nintendo operates in certain areas.

I asked them about some stuff relating to Callie and localisations, and they told me that the "Hypnoshades" are actually just called "sunglasses," in the original Japanese version of Splatoon 2 and theres no mention of brainwashing OR hypnosis. All of the events in the original japanese version of Splatoon 2 seemed to be a lot more vague and up for interpretation which i found to be very interesting!!

However.... the editor told me that the English localisation line from DJ Octavio, "I remixed Callie's brain!" is actually different in the original japanese version.

GUESS WHAT DJ OCTAVIO SAID...

"Aori-Chan is so simple minded! I was able to brainwash her with ease."

Nintendo JP.... WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?! I WAS YOUR BIGGEST DEFENDER!! WHAT IS THIS?!?!?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT IN THE ORIGINAL JAPANESE VERSION... CALLIE WAS STILL BRAINWASHED?!?!

Oh I'm gonna be sick....

You know, this ultimately just proves something to me.

Splatoon 2's writing... just fucking sucks. Straight up, it's ass. And not the good kind. It's poorly written and you wanna know why? It's set up is REALLY GOOD!!!! but it's pay off is the most uninteresting, vile, disrespectful, childish, lazy, DISGUSTING THING THEY COULD HAVE POSSIBLY DONE!!!

All this interesting set up with Callie and having this arc where she's so lonely and busy that she ultimately runs away to the Octarians, joins them willingly and ends up getting hypnotised, resulting in her becoming more emotional and seeping into the darkness in her heart... Marie, having to come and remind her of the good times they had together... to reignite the positivity in Callie's heart... to repair what they have broken... to have a fresh start...

But did this setup get paid off in a satisfying and emotionally deep way? No.... they choose to TREAT CALLIE LIKE A FUCKING MORON AND FOR WHAT REASON?!?!?! ARE NINTENDO JUST SCARED OF DEPTH?!?! WHATS THEIR FUCKING ISSUE?!?!?!

ITS SO DISRESPECTFUL!!! SHE LOST THE FINAL SPLATFEST AND YOU CONTINUE TO BEAT HER DOWN?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! WHAT WERE THE WRITERS COOKING?!?!?! GET THEM OUT OF THE KITCHEN DAMN IT!!!!

They literally picked the most uninteresting and disgusting fucking outcome possible and I genuinely don't know why. There's SOOOO much concept art and multiple sunken scroll entries that showcase this depth for Callie, AND THEY THREW IT AWAY!!!

But you know what? Im gonna continue to hold my stance about the events of splatoon 2 because I would rather like to look at the story in a more interesting and narratively fulfilling way than what Nintendo is trying to push. Sure, it might not be what Nintendo said happened, but I would rather look at the events in a different, more character rich way for my own fucking sanity and enjoyment. I am going to continue to say fuck you to the notion that "Callie was brainwashed and kidnapped" because I like stories where characters go through character arcs and growth!!!! I hate it when that depth and agency for my favourite character in this franchise IS TAKEN AWAY!!!!

I would rather live in a world where Fresh Start ACTAULLY MAKES SENSE AS A SONG!! I would rather live in a world where OCTAVIO ISNT A FUCKING UNREDEEMABLE EVIL MONSTER THAT CUTTLEFISH WOULD NEVER WANNA SEE AGAIN AFTER HEARING WHAT HE DID TO CALLIE!!!!

I would rather live in a world where Splatoon 3 feels more satisfying to me and the Squid Sisters get proper send offs and pay offs to their arcs from the start of Splatoon 1.

I would rather live in a world where Tidal Rush is more emotional and personal, THAN SOME BULLSHIT "oh we gotta save callie because she's a dumb idiot and she's an object to grab because it's a video game!!! Ha ha!!!"

I would rather live in a world where Callie is given a proper character arc, INSTEAD OF GETTING KIDNAPPED AND THESE AWFUL AND DISGUSTING THINGS DONE TO HER! ONLY FOR IT TO GET REVERSED SO EASILY WITH NO MENTION OF THESE EVENTS EVER AGAIN!!!!!

UGH.... I'm actually so angry. I hate this so much.

When Splatoon 4 comes out, I'm not gonna hold back on my criticisms. I want change out of these writers because the current format we have for Splatoon stories is actual dogshit and I'm so tired of it. Everyone in the community is tired of the cool and interesting character details being pushed to the side and hidden away because Nintendo fucking hates narratives and only saves it for RPGS for some ungodly reason.

Im tired of important character details giving shoved off in optional and hard to find content. I'm tired of these awful implications and events being spread like wildfire in the community because daddy Nintendo said so.

Im done.

[shankstea]

it’s so sad to realize that in this scene, buggy understood that shanks shone in a way he didn’t— that shanks was better in aspects that he couldn’t fulfill. he recognized that shanks was the one to be trusted to follow in roger's footsteps and become the next pirate king. so, buggy gave up on being the pirate king, his dream that he could never voice because first, his captain wanted to achieve that dream, and then there was shanks too, who was everything buggy wasn't

how could he dream so big when shanks was there? when shanks was everything?

and in the rain scene after roger's execution, both were mourning. both were put in such a hard spot that shanks didn’t want to rush into the great pirate era, he didn’t want to do anything really (that depression must've been fucking astronomical) so, shanks told buggy he wasn’t going after the one piece. how else could buggy take that? he was hurt, he saw the image—no, the world he built around shanks becoming the next pirate king—crumble with a few simple words from shanks' mouth, it was as if his world ended

[kintmints]

i was watching dougdoug and parkzer clips during this and i do NOT regret a single thing i have done.

[movielosophy]

Journey To Love | Don't worry! I'll be back soon.

[burningfunobject]

I CAN NOT BELIEVE I TRUSTED JAYCE. JAYCE I WANTED TO BELIEVE IN YOU

What the actual fuck

Viktor was the most content hes ever been, the healthiest he's even been and you SHOOT HIM IN THE FYCKING CHEST

How. HOW does jinx have better impulse control than jayce this season????

I cant wait a week

I can't do this

[stefisdoingthings]

Interesting how the only darker-skinned character in tristamp is Zazie, who is, quite frankly, not even human! Hmm, I'm definitely not saying that Studio Orange tried to make them "exotic" or anything, haha, paired with their design and all, not saying they're kinda racist, of course!!

[doriantomybasil]

so here’s my dilemma of the day: i was working with this guy today and he’s so pretty and he’s so nice and funny and i think he likes me, he was smiling at me all day when we saw each other and always sat next to me when we were in the same room and i definitely like him the problem is that he’s nineteen and i’m twenty one and i feel like that’s weird especially because the way that bilingual high school courses are structured he hasn’t graduated yet but he would’ve if he didn’t go to a bilingual one and i don’t know what to do but i guess it doesn’t really matter because i can’t find him on any social media so i guess the ball is in his court? he knows my full name and it’s not a very common name idk how to feel about this whole thing

[drawingcrunch]

worst shit ive ever made you dont even need to tell me

sigh dude i swear i saw this in my dream last night before i even knew this damned album was out what is wrong with me

[littleboneboyxd]

being hypersexual sucks :c

like bro why do i have to feel this wayyyyyyyyy ToT

i dont even like these feelings sexual things disgust me but no matter what i can never give them up.

idk i thought getting a partner would distract me from that i guess not :c

might relapse idkkk

i feel like that one lyric from blue hair by tv girl

"theres really no way of winning if in their eyes you'll always be a dumb blonde"

[woodlouseonastring]

a v-vvampire (imagine q lip bite there bcs no emoji for thqt 😔)

omg bella is that you 🥺

[lastoneout]

Day 3 of not sleeping: Didn't have any nightmares, thank god(I had a very long and involved One Piece dream??), but I tossed and turned and woke up a bunch and def didn't get anywhere near enough sleep. I'm awake now but I feel like completely shit, no migraines yet at least but I have a feeling that's going to change soon. Idk how tf I used to live like this.

[alexanderdacoolguy2]

this is so low effort omfg

still cool ig

[kyathedino]

yall ever lose something and not like grieve for it directly but instead grieve for the things that are no longer there? like i have nothing to do every other friday now. i have none of the community i used to. everything i spent a year building is just fucking gone. i don't ever cry about not having it, but i keep this hollow ache in my chest every day just because ill never have it back. i can go back to the past, but nobody's there anymore. they aren't going to just wait for me.