#GET TO THE POINT

[texaschainsawmascara]

y’all: whatever happened to 28 episode long seasons?

me: thank fuckin god

[miserye]

i thought i was a crazy yapper but this bithc of a professor i have is insane when it comes to saying useless information

[mattsmemes]

[queenielacy]

I love Cody and Seth, but they better not ramble on for 40 minutes like the Rock.

[ninthform]

holy shit the police officers are pissing me off

[jt1674]

[emmafallsinlove]

something that really bothers me on a personal level is when gamers do critiques on youtube saying on their videos, after a new game has came out: “after been 400 hours into this game i can say -“ there’s no way that the game came out yesterday or last week and you managed to get 400 hours of gameplay. and even if you… do, somehow, by miracle, was able to earn that amount of hours of gameplay, do you even enjoyed playing? or did you just rushed doing everything as fast as you can so you could be the first to do a video about this game and earn more views? i’m just sick of this culture lately.

[ejzah]

When someone says they’re wrapping up, but then continues to talk for another hour.

[bruciemilf]

Bruce truly hates magic with every pump and beat of his heart.

What kinda curse is Slang, anyway?

“This is the best day of my life.”

“Bro really thought he ate with that.” Bruce physically feels a full body shiver, charged with nausea and cringe. “This is level 10 cringe. Can’t have shit in Gotham.”

Dick is his earth bound angel, but he laughs like a demon at him, holding onto Jason for support, pledging his eternal loyalty to Zatana and her pettiness.

—

“Hey, old bat, hook me up with an adrenaline shot.”

What he wants to say is Jay, do not try and fight with 6 bullets in your stomach.

What comes out instead, through Bruce’s grit teeth and intense, fierce glaring, “Not you trying to go back to your corpse era. See how I only took 2 shots? Very demure. Very mindful.”

Jason passes out from blood loss, but mostly laughter.

—

“Chat, is this real?”

Stephanie barely bites back a full belly cackle. “I think he just asked us if we copied.”

“I wish I was Jason, 15.”

—

“This is not a slay environment. Killing is flop behavior.” He keeps his eyes shut and buries his face in his hands. Trying to convince Damian not to stab someone doesn’t seem to work.

Damian gives him a pat like he’s a pitiful cat. “I’ll only stab the non lethal areas.”

“God, I wish that were me.”

[milkcryptid]

do people have no shame anymore?

[carsonjonesfiance]

“This thing is legally dubious and therefore technically unenforceable.” Is not a “useless liberal gotcha” it’s how legalism works in this country. Tying up stupidly worded EOs in court is the quickest way to keep them from being implemented. It is the definition of “doing something.” But it doesn’t usually involve much tweeting so of course a certain type of leftist feels obligated to mock it.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

we need more divorcebaiting. how strongly can canon imply (without technically outright stating) that these two characters are bitterly, acrimoniously divorced? essential we explore this

[gloriousmonsters]

when you're feeling full hater mode about a piece of media but you know one of your beloved mutuals enjoys it

[skipppppy]

Highkey one of the funniest parts of Gravity Falls is how obnoxiously close they come to revealing Ford’s existence in the early seasons but never do out of just. Cosmic levels of dumb luck

Episode 1 Stan nearly catches Dipper with the journal and it’s passed off as a gag about Gold Chains for Old Men magazine. In Time Travellers Pig they go back to the Shack 30 years in the past and miss Ford opening the door on them by literal seconds. In bottomless pit Mabel gives him a set of truth teeth that make him incapable of lying and he tells the twins TO THEIR FACES that he regularly commits massive tax fraud and if they had asked him to elaborate he would’ve told them who he was impersonating. In one of the shorts Dipper and Soos find a sentient omniscient mailbox that will answer any question in the universe, and right before they can ask it who wrote the journals Mabel shows it a video of herself snorting gummy worms and it kills itself out of disgust. The entirety of Dreamscaperers is them delving into the depths of Stan’s psyche, going through his memories, all while fighting his brother’s ex-boyfriend and it somehow just. Doesn’t come up. Bill never mentions him. Their grandpa Shermie never said anything. Their parents never said anything. Either the universe was conspiring to cover it up or they are genuinely all that oblivious

[unsung-idiot]

don't show him modern technology; it won't end well

bonus under the cut:

[antlerclxws]