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dashofmonsters · 1 year ago

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Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 2

Merman x Female Reader

"I'll have to go into hibernation if it gets too cold or if I can't find something to do. The acclimation program already knows about my kind and our issues with the cold so they have accommodations for winter," he explains.

"Well I hope it doesn't get too cold then, would be a bummer if I couldn't come see you," you smile at him.

Tao's eyes go wide for a second before he clears his throat, "Yes well it would indeed be a bummer... Especially since we have just decided to be friends."

"Right?" you beam.

You and Tao talk and talk almost to the point where it's just about silly things or what he's struggling with during his acclimation. You find out he's a very literal person who has issues the most with slang, metaphors, and emotes. He lives in a rental that's about a couple miles away from the beach and he usually walks to work or the local grocery store since he can't fit into normal vehicles.

After a little bit of work though you find out an even more endearing side to him, he likes to try his hand at cooking ever so often. Though he prefers his meat raw, he likes the idea of charring the outside and adding bits of flavor. He was a little embarrassed to admit it but you found out it's because his father was supposed to show him how to create a feast to impress a mate per tradition.

You didn't press as to why his father didn't teach him seeing he was already uncomfortable enough to admit it. So you decided to share a bit of something uncomfortable about yourself.

"My mom never taught me how to do a lot of basics that most parents are supposed to teach their kids. I had to watch a lot of how to videos and make myself look like an idiot if I messed up or didn't know something. A lot of people assumed I was stupid or had no common sense. I just didn't have a point of reference and I hated being ignorant but I was judged for my short comings and no one ever helped," you admit.

Tao nods and gives you his first, though very small, smile.

"Is that why you are forgetting things constantly?" he asks with the slightest smirk.

"Yeah...sure," you feel a bit embarrassed by his question, but you'll never confess that you 'forgot' those things just as an excuse to talk to him.

"I see, I will take that into account that due to your upbringing that you just don't think about these things and I will stop being annoyed by it," he nods.

"You were annoyed," now you feel a little hurt.

"Of course I was, but no more than I usually am," he shrugs.

"That doesn't sound fun," you grimace. "You can't just be annoyed all the time."

"I'm not annoyed when I'm at home," he says.

"Lucky," you laugh.

"Why? Are you unable to be at peace at home too?" he gives you a look of genuine concern then.

His number one thing seems to be peace. He's a no nonsense guy who just wants to go about his day with no hiccups. His life honestly seems perfect compared to your at times.

"Only when I'm sleeping or about to leave for work. Peace... that doesn't come easy to someone like me," you frown.

Tao studies you then as he drops to your eye level. You should feel super uncomfortable but for some reason you don't mind. He stares hard at your face and scans it until he nods.

"You do look very tired," he says.

You can't help but to laugh at his observation, "Tao, I'm going to let you in on a secret: I'm always tired."

"That is unhealthy," he scowls.

"Yup and there's nothing I can do about it," you shrug.

"Yes there is, you could go home and sleep," he says, almost ordering you to do so.

That's when you can't help but to crack up. It's horrible that this is how you cope, but it is.

"If I went home to sleep right now, my grandmother would give me an earful about being lazy," you laugh.

Tao doesn't laugh, he doesn't smile, doesn't do anything except stand up slowly and prowl over to you.

You shut up real quick thinking something is wrong until he picks you up. You yelp, being carried in one arm at his hip like a sack of rice.

"What are you doing?!" you squawk as you sway when he shifts to carry you princess style.

He doesn't say anything until he sets you down onto your tie dye towel.

"Rest, I'll make sure no one bothers you while you're here," he says.

You can't help but feel a mix of emotions then. Your eyes water a little but you swipe away any moisture before a tear falls.

"Thank you, that's probably the sweetest thing anyone has said to me in a long while," you smile at him.

And Tao in all his Taoness, just nods.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Tao really meant it when he said no one would bother you while you were on the beach.

The day after he said that, you had what was possibly the best beach nap you've ever had thanks to Tao brining you a beach chair with your name on it. Literally.

At first it felt weird that he'd go that far just for you to get a beach nap but you guessed it might be some cultural thing and as far as Tao said, you're his only friend. You thanked him and didn't think much of it until the day after that.

A group of teenagers were playing volleyball a little too roughly and one of the guys fumbled and the ball got you right on the head even though you did your best to dodge it. The boys tried to apologize but Tao gave them an earful about respect and being more spatially aware.

That too was normal for Tao though he was a bit harsher than usual. Unfortunately it got worse.

Yesterday was a blessed off day. No work, your grandmother was out thrifting to her heart's content, and all your bills had been paid. You were excited to head to the beach but that excitement was short lived.

The first thing you noticed was that your chair was pulled a little closer to the guard tower. Next was that Tao wasn't in the tower but leaning against the ladder like he was expecting some shit to hit the fan any second. And finally, the group of muscle hunks posing as they flexed for the cameras.

Apparently some magazine decided this spot was the perfect location for some weird gym rat protein powder ad photo shoot and to make matters worse, they tried to rope Tao into it.

Before you sat down though, Tao made a bit of a scene by scooting your chair even closer to the tower while making eye contact with one of the big buff dudes.

You told him he was being a bit extra to which he said he was only being cautious as they had been eyeing you since you started walking down the beach. You rolled your eyes, ready to tell him that there's no way they'd be interested in you until he thrusted a binder in your direction.

It was a detailed list of ingredients, dishes, and recipes commonly enjoyed by all saltwater merfolk with a few dishes his kind liked the most. You had almost forgot that he said he'd make this list for you so when he gave it to you, you almost cried.

You thanked him and started fanning through the pages and noticed his hand writing was especially nice on dishes that his people particularly enjoyed. You gave him a quick side eye and smiled.

These are probably his personal favorites, you think.

As you started to skim through the recipes with the neatest hand writing a shadow fell over you.

It was one of the buff guys.

He gave you the most generic social media fake ass grins ever and you couldn't help the eye roll. He started to introduce himself but was hardcore interrupted when Tao drove him into the ground like a fucking bull.

Tao and the buff guy started hashing it out until his bros came and peeled him away from the fight. It was the first time you really really saw Tao's teeth. Sharp and pointy like a shark's and then there was the spike like fins on his lower arms and legs. He looked like a mad dog ready to rip someone in half.

You heard one of the photographers comment on how territorial some of the fair folk can be with places or people they claim as their own.

If that was the case, then you guessed it might have to do with your friendship with Tao. If it wasn't, then he's about the get a stern talking to.

~~~~~~

"He was bothering you, I don't see why you're upset with me," Tao says after you lectured him about yesterday.

"I'm upset you dingbat because shit like that can get you sent back to your home realm! Do you think I want my friend to get deported over shit like that," you poke his arm, but it ends up being a jab.

Tao opens his mouth then closes it. He looks around a bit then let's out a long sigh "I'm sorry. I really don't know what's come over me. After I moved here, I didn't have my shoal. My sponsor checks on me maybe once every three months since he's been busy working with another merman who's been trying to get his pass here. I guess the loneliness drove me a bit crazy."

Now you feel bad for making him feel bad but you hope your gift will more than make up for it. You worked all morning long on it, double checking to make sure the meat was ready and perfect right before you left the house and that the sea greens were cooked and seasoned just right.

"Well moving past that, I brought you something," you take out the lunch box and show it to Tao.

He looks down right shocked as he goes to reach for it. He carefully removes the lid and his eyes stare hard at the contents.

"You made this... for me," his voice is soft and quiet and you can hear the pain behind it. He hesitates for a moment then takes a slice of the thin cut beef and pops it in his mouth. He closes his eyes and tilts his head back and swallows. He's quiet for a minute and you're afraid you messed up and he's too nice to tell you other wise.

"Tao if it's bad you can just tell me, I can take the criticism," you tell him, ready for the critical blow.

Instead he tilts his head back down and opens his eyes. The whites are now all black which makes his yellow irises pop even more so.

"My friend, if this was bad I would have spat it out," he grabs two more slices and then a few more practically stuffing his face like a kid who was caught with a bag of candy.

You watch as he eats everything, savoring every bite like he hasn't had a decent meal in ages. His harsh features soften as he takes the last bite and licks his fingers clean. For some reason you focus on him as he rolls the sauce off of his fingers and onto his tongue.

Bad lonely thoughts, Tao is our friend. Nothing more, nothing less.

"So was it good?" you ask, though you can probably guess the answer by the clean plate.

"If I was mermaid being offered a feast, I'd allow you the honor to continue courting me," he jokes.

"Oh what an honor," you laugh.

For the first time since you've met him he laughs back. You can't help but stare at him and feel a smile build up that hurts your cheeks.

"Thank you, really. I have tried and tried to create something that tastes like home but it was never quite right. It was either too salty or I over cooked the meat or the greens were under cooked somehow. This is pretty close to the flavors of my shoal. I didn't realize how much I missed this," he looks down at the empty lunch box with a mix of emotions.

Something in you feels for him. You haven't had a taste of home in forever but your problem is that you're pretty sure that it would make you physically sick instead of homesick. Home never felt like home, here didn't feel like home until you met Jessica and Tao.

Jessica made you her to die for pie for you birthday which you almost threw up from over drinking when she took you bar hopping for your birthday. Tao gave you an amazingly detailed binder of saltwater mer foods and recipes.

You can't think of anything better than food that brings all sorts of peoples together, human or the fair folk.

"Well, I can't do it all the time but I can at least make you a boxed lunch once a week, how does that sound," you smile at him.

"If it weren't for the fact that you're human and my friend I'd think you were trying to court me," he laughs. "But yes, that sounds good."

You play slap him and he laughs again.

~~~~~~~~~

"For the last time Jes, there's nothing romantic going on between Tao and I," you roll your eyes as Jessica gives you her biggest grin.

"Uh huh, sure girl. Maybe you don't see it that way, but guys don't risk getting deported for just friends and not just once. This is what, the second offence? He's lucky that he's, oh what did you say? A combination of a bookish mafia boss, the inspiration for the statues of deities and all around hotty mchot hot hot," she wriggles her brows at you before popping another slice of gum in her mouth.

You snort laugh, "I did not say that last one Jes."

"No, but you were thinking it," she raises a brow and twirls around till she's behind the counter.

"Listen, I can find him physically attractive and still not want more than a friendship. Plus he hasn't come onto me so I'm pretty sure he's not into me like that," you sigh and continue cleaning the table you just cleared.

Jessica hums something and clicks her tongue, "Girl you do know he's not human right? That he might have been coming onto you from the get go without you realizing it? Shoot for that matter he might not even realize it himself."

That has you curious now.

"What do you mean by that," you look over you shoulder to see Jes twirling a red curl.

"Oh you know, that the fair folk believe in fated mates and things like that," she gives you a cheesy grin and blushes a little.

You do know about the fated mates thing, it's one of the reasons a lot of fair folk, especially the guys, flocked to this realm in droves once the rift border opened up. With the fae it was pretty easy to tell once the bond clicked which wasn't always immediately. Their calm and calculated appearance would become wild and untamed. They would get quickly territorial and easily violent towards anyone who came close to their mate. A mark would usually show above the heart and a matching one would appear on their mate once their bond was consummated.

As for merman, no one had any idea what to look for since they just started coming this side as of a few years ago.

"Yes, I'm well aware about that. So what does that have to do with him not know if he's coming onto me," you ask.

"They know it deep down and act on it sometimes. They don't even realize they're courting you half the time or that they have this desire to want to be with you. It's hardcore ingrained into their DNA or something, I don't know. But it sounds to me that he is indeed into you. You're both just too oblivious to see it. Unlike Artek," Jes grins at the mention of her wild fae lover's name and sighs.

And suddenly her weird school girl crush behavior makes sense.

"Jes, did you and Artek.... Wait a sec, are you and-"

Jessica folds down her top just enough for you to see part of a swirling mark above her heart. She shakes in place with the goofiest smile you've ever seen on her.

"Just found out last night. Oh and he did not want to let me go," she places a hand on her forehead and feigns being scandalized. "But I have to go to work. He threatened to come in and tear Mikey a new one if he so much as thinks he can schedule me during my bond week," she give a vicious grin then.

The fae took about a week to celebrate their mate bond here, which was a much shorter version of their actual month long festivity of it. Mates were so rare on their side for some reason but here it was becoming as normal as two humans getting married. It just happened, but it was equally special if not more so.

Regardless, you were happy for Jes. Mikey tried to take everything from her in their divorce but got next to nothing after a detective brought in proof of his multiple affairs. That's why he's such an ass to her here.

"So, when's your bride feast huh? Gonna go all out," you turn to her and cross your arms.

Jessica goes into great detail about what she wants to do for the rest of the shift. That Artek has invited his large ass family this side to celebrate and that he's already started sourcing materials for their marriage bed. It was more than obvious that she's over the moon and can't get over the fact that she's found the one after years of dealing with a heartache.

Mikey tried to shut her down but several of the fair folk patrons snapped at him saying that it's a blessing that her and Artek found one another and he shouldn't discourage her happiness. His flustered face was priceless.

~~~~~

"Hey grandmama, I'm home," you shout as you slide your shoes off at the door.

Your grandmother's house is unusually quiet for this time of day when she's usually scrolling through her phone while listening to her soap operas. You look around and the livingroom is empty and so is the kitchen. You're about to call her when you see a note on the fridge saying Gayle has whisked her away for margaritas with the girls.

"Fuck me sideways and call me bob," you rake your fingers over your face in frustration. As much as you can't stand her normal antics you loath her when she's drunk. If you're lucky, Gayle will have her spend the night at her house until their hangovers wear off. If you weren't, there's a nice beach with your name on it.

Typically you'd go there after work but you're tired and you have the house to yourself right now. So you stretch and crack open the fridge and start preparing for a blissful night of snacking and binge watching some of your favorite shows.

~~~~

Hours pass and you get a text from Gayle that she's taking your grandmother home with her since she's had one too many and sends you a pic of your grandmother trying to put a dollar bill in a male strippers strap.

"Thanks for the mental scarring Gayle, just what I needed," you text back to her knowing she'll get the joke.

Gayle was a close family friend and was more like a grandmother to you than your biological one was at times. She was sweet and caring with a crazy sense of humor and infectious laughter. You sometimes wish you lived with her but she travels too much and she likes her alone time just as much as she like partying.

You squirm in your grandmother's recliner and grab a bag of chips getting ready for the next show until you hear a frantic knock at your door.

The bag flies out of your hand due to your shock reflex and you place a hand over your heart.

The knocking continues as you rush to the door to check through the peephole. You can't see nothing.

"Who is it?" you ask.

"It's me, are you ok," you hear Tao's voice.

You pause, not remembering if you ever told him where you live aside from the general direction. You slowly open the door and look up at him. He looks worried out of his mind.

"Tao, are you ok? You look like you've seen a ghost buddy," you ask him.

His hair is all messed up and he's breathing fast and hard, trying to catch his breath and his tan skin looks like he worried himself sick.

"You didn't come to the beach today. You've been coming everyday except when it rains. I thought something happened," he frowns.

"Oh uh well, no I'm fine. My grandmother is out tonight so I thought I'd enjoy a night in since this rarely happens," you explain.

"I see, ok... That's good then. As long as you're alright," he nods and sighs as he leans against the top of the door frame.

A crack of thunder peels off in the distance causing Tao to flinch. He looks even more worried then.

"Sounds like rain," you comment.

"Yes, I... I should get going then, I don't want to accidentally transform back to my other form while walking home. It'd be very inconv-"

Before he finishes that thought lightning bursts through the sky and the little misting sprinkle turns into a torrential downpour.

Tao groans and looks resigned as he's about to turn to leave but you quickly stop him.

"Hey you can stay here for tonight if you want to wait out the rain," you tell him.

He looks to you like that's possibly the dumbest thing you could say.

"That sounds inappropriate," he glares at you. "Inviting an unmated male into your house is never wise."

"Tao we're friends and adults. I'm pretty sure I can trust you to keep your hands to yourself unless you've had ulterior motives from the get go," you cross your arms and stare up at him.

"It is still unwise," he nods, being firm.

"Oh so then you do have ulterior motives," you raise a brow.

"I never said that," he grimaces.

"Then there's no problem if you don't. Come on, get your ass in here," you open the door all the way and beckon him inside.

You hear him groan as he accepts his defeat while walking in. He struggles with the low ceiling, well low for him as he shuts the door.

"Is this your first time in a human house," you ask, leading him to the livingroom.

"Yes, it's very uh small and compact," he notes.

You get the compact part as your grandmother is a bit of a tidy hoarder, the small thing, that's probably due to his height.

"Well mi casa su casa. Well more like mi abuela's casa su casa, but still, make yourself at home," you say then try to offer him something warm to eat and drink.

Tao tries to deny any offers but you snap back saying it's rude to deny your hostess the honor of taking care of her guest. Tao eventually resigns and you bring him a warm cup of tea. As you go to the kitchen to make him something to eat he asks if he can watch you. You agree and start pulling ingredients left and right.

You get fully into the zone as you start preparing the food. You glance over at Tao ever so often just to see that he's fixated on your process. As you start cooking you notice the whites of his eyes turn black again. He sniffs the air and his pupils dilate.

"Want to try a bite," you offer him a piece and he takes it with no hesitation and scarfs it down. His nails which are sharp and pointed seem a bit longer and more pointier now. His expression looks more predatory than normal and some of his spikey fins have started protruding.

Guess that means he's really hungry.

"Give me just a few more minutes and dinner will be ready ok," you tell him as you continue on with his meal.

Tao just nods and stares daggers at pan. You feel like if you let him he'd lunge at it with reckless abandon and eat everything in record timing.

After a little bit you scoop the meat into a bowl and hand it to him. He looks at it and takes in a deep whiff before carefully grabbing a bite. He looks like he's holding back going ham on the food and you're wondering if he's trying not to scare you by going into some weird merman feeding frenzy.

"Hey if you need to eat however you want to eat, go ahead. I can just uh go into another room if you want some privacy or someth-"

Tao grabs a handful of the meat and stuffs his face with it. His pupils nearly engulf his irises making his eyes look pitch black. He tears into the strips of meat like a crazed hungry animal. The juices and sauce start dripping down his arms and you roll your eyes at the mess.

"I'm going to get you a towel, that stuff'll get sticky after a while," you say as you walk towards to laundry room.

Tao grunts and consumes some more meat.

As you get to the laundry room you smack yourself over the head for having another bout of terrible lonely girl thoughts.

Tao, smack.

Is, smack.

Just, smack.

A, smack.

Friend, smack.

You should not be even more attracted to him after that feeding frenzy trance thing he just went in and yet you can't stop thinking about it.

"God, does that mean I'm depraved," you question yourself. "Or does this just mean I'm weird and anything goes right now in my lonely haven't had sex in ages mind?"

Probably a bad mix of both...

You sigh and grab a towel and turn only to be met with a brick wall.

"Oh hey, are you done," you ask, praying that he didn't hear you questioning your sexual sanity.

He nods and cocks his head and points to the towel.

"Yeah, um here," you hand it to him and he slowly but carefully cleans himself off.

"So there's a guest bedroom in the back. Bed is probably a bit small for you even though it's a king size. It gets cold at night since my grandmother has the a/c on a schedule so I'll bring you some extra blankets," you tell him as you turn to go show him the room.

He quietly follows you and steps slowly into the room, smelling and inspecting it. You leave him be while you go grab a large comforter and a few throw blanket for him. When you come back he's already curled under the covers with his feet barely sticking out. As you go to lay another layer over him he snatches you and pulls you into the covers with him.

You flail about for a bit until you hear what you're pretty sure in a purr. You kick up the covers to see Tao asleep now and honest to gods purring. He pulls you in closer and just cuddles you. He's mentioned a few times that when someone gets cold that his shoal will form basically cuddle piles to stay warm. Maybe that's it and maybe he's also really homesick. He said he can never go back though...

"Just this once, jeeze. Not letting you go into a feeding frenzy next time I give you food," you snort laugh and try to relax against Mr. Brick wall.

Tao shifts a bit till he's holding you close enough that you can hear his heartbeat. He moves the covers and extra blankets back up and slowly drifts back to sleep.

You're a little jealous of how fast he can nod off but eventually you start dozing in and out.

He's probably going to flip the fuck out about this in the morning. Well, we'll deal with it then...

#monster boyfriend #monster x girl #monster x human #monster x reader #monster lover #merman #Tao the merman #merman x reader #monster romance #merman boyfriend #monster love #merman x female reader #monster boyfriend oc #monster bf #slow burn #slow burn romance

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iwritefandomimagines · 2 years ago

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WRONG DECISION — ROY KENT

masterlist

pairing: roy kent x footballer!reader

description: you’ve just finished negotiating a contract to sign for arsenal, and the first thing you do is excitedly go to tell your boyfriend. you forgot, however, to factor in how he’d react to your choice of club. [based on a request]

warnings: swearing, jokey argument, a lil fluffy too

author’s note: kinda short and sweet but i hope you enjoy regardless !!! this is the first roy fic on the blog so i hope it’s okay. x

“I have news!”

Roy raised his eyebrows silently, waiting for you to blurt out what it was that you were so excited to tell him, you’d not even said hello first.

“Go on then,” he urged, and something in his face told you he already knew what you were about to say.

You perched yourself on the edge of your shared couch, where he was sat leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.

“So you know my contract is coming to an end and I said I wasn’t going to renew given the terms they wanted me to agree to?” you bit your lip, and he tilted his head, “Right.”

You’d just made one of the biggest decisions of your life and signed for one of the biggest clubs in England, and yet here you were suddenly terrified to tell your boyfriend the news.

How had you not considered that your boyfriend was a Chelsea legend and you’ve just signed for fucking Arsenal?

Sure — you were positively ecstatic at the opportunity, but you knew he wasn’t going to be all too impressed even if he did want the best for you.

As far as Roy was concerned, Chelsea were the club you should’ve set your sights on.

“I’ve been trying to keep my discussions with clubs secret from you in case they fell through, but I’ve just signed for fuckin’ Arsenal!”

You watched him grit his teeth for a moment before he forced a smile that was nothing short of sarcastic, before he then managed to muster a smile that could have appeared genuine if you didn’t know him so well.

“You’re mad,” you folded your arms across your chest, a teasing smirk on your face as you tried not to giggle at his petty irritation.

“Mad? Me? I’m not mad,” he replied, gulping, “This is big news, I’m proud of you.”

You quirked your brow at him, “Might wanna tell that to your face, babe.”

You watched his face switch through a number of expressions in a matter of seconds as he overthought how he was appearing right now.

He looked down for a moment, “I am proud of you,” he paused for a moment before looking back up at you, “But Arsenal? Really?”

“You’re just pissed I didn’t sign for Chelsea,” you tutted, “They didn’t even want me!”

“They fuckin’ did,” he countered, “They told me they did! They said they were going to try and make you an offer!”

You laughed, shuffling a little closer to him and placing your hand on his arm as you watched the veins on his forehead begin to appear as you made another confession, “Yeah, okay you’re right. They did.”

“You what?”

“They made me an offer…”

Roy went to interject, but you weren’t going to let him do so before you finished.

“But Arsenal made a better one,” you shrugged, not mad at his reaction but just rather amused, “I love you, babe, but I’m not going to just sign for Chelsea to keep you happy, you grumpy old sod.”

“Fair enough.”

You were silent for a moment, watching him fight the urge to make a comment until he no longer could, “It’s turning my stomach just thinking about you having to wear that kit, you know.”

You rolled your eyes, “Don’t watch then!”

“Well I have to! I can’t not support my girlfriend, I’m not a total prick,” he grumbled, to which you quirked your brow, “I said not a total prick.”

“Then grow up and get over it, I guess. I’m a gunner now, baby! And you can’t stop it!” you singsonged as you walked away from him into your shared kitchen, hopping up on the counter and swinging your legs as you took a sip from a glass of water he’d left on the side.

He shot up to follow you, parting your knees so that he could stand between them and holding them still.

“I am really fucking proud of you, love,” he smiled, “Even if you have made the wrong decision here and picked the wrong club.”

You shoved his chest softly in jest, scoffing, “Shut up!”

“Alright, alright,” he conceded, lifting his hands in surrender before cupping your chin with them, “I’m proud you’ve signed a better contract, and I will get over seeing you in that godawful fucking kit.”

“Hmm,” you hummed, pressing a quick kiss to his nose and watching him roll his eyes as you did so, “Better. We’ll work on it.”

He didn’t say anything, kissing you now in such a way that made it clear he really was proud of you.

Roy knew how hard you worked and how much you loved football, and to see how well you were doing for yourself made him immensely proud.

Sure, he was less than impressed that he’d have to spend at least the next season or so in the home end at the Emirates stadium cheering you on.

But for you, he’d do anything, really.

———

sorry this was quite short but i liked it as it was and didn’t want to add superfluous filler for the sake of it so kept it short and sweet <3 hope u enjoyed and thank you again for the request x

if you’d like to request anything, feel free — and in the meantime, here is my masterlist!

#roy kent #roy kent x reader #roy kent x y/n #roy kent x you #ted lasso imagine #ted lasso imagines #ted lasso #roy kent fluff #roy kent imagine #roy kent imagines

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bubbleddisasters · 9 months ago

Text

Since Y’all liked the last one, heres something somewhat similar:

TWST Characters as funny / random ass moments with my friends/family

———-

Ace : A good friend of mine made an entire Cards against Humanity Deck including us, and we played it at like 4 am.

Also, one of my closest childhood friends of now 11 years, the way we first met was he insulted me, and then thirty minutes later I peeked at his notebook while he was drawing (our beds were next to eachother) recognized Sans from a meme, and then managed to bullshit through an entire conversation about Undertale without him suspecting I didn’t know what the hell I was talking about.

I made a joke about it a little less then a year ago, thinking he knew by now, but no. He looks at me and the conversation goes:

“Are you telling me our entire first interaction was you just fucking improvising through a discussion of a fandom you didn’t know shit about?”

“Wait you didn’t know?”

“NO?!”

“You genuinely believed that I knew what I was talking about then for 10 years?!?”

“Surprisingly, yes.”

Deuce: I was biking with my sister, and she accidentally biked straight into a fucking lake. Also when my dad looked me dead in the eye after receiving one of my graded tests and goes

“How the fuck do you answer Maine four times on different questions and be wrong for all four times.”

Bonus Adeuceyuu combo: Me and two of my childhood friends once linked together to grab something we saw in a river, turns out it was just a broken fishing rod.

Also another on me and the above two friends meeting: The first thing one of them did was insult me, and I genuinely have zero memory of how I met the other.

Basically, we met at a sleepaway camp as kids, and for some reason, our sleepaway camp had some wackass shit, but one of them was this game. I don’t remember the name of it, but you had to go in groups of 3-4 and tie ribbons around each staff tent/cabinside without getting caught (and keep in mind each campsite and Cabins were very spread apart) at midnight, and the first to return to the cafeteria, where the staff were waiting, and did so after tying them all, on won.

Kids age 12-17, in the middle of fuck knows where in the woods Long Island, running around in the dark unsupervised with only any light bringing items they brought themselves.

So me, and we’ll call them C and M, teamed up. It’d take too long to go into full detail, but it was a very Prologue Mines fused with Camp Vargas core adventure.

Bonus First year gang in general : Me and three friends were waiting for something I genuinely don’t remember in an abandoned dorm area and got extremely bored, and one of them could do a perfect Donald Duck impression, and another a really good goofy, and this somehow led to us having a fake reality tv show verbal bitchfight as Donald, Goofy, Mickey and Minnie for a solid hour. We all regretted not recording it.

Cater: My friend from Wales entirely forgot about the existence of timezones and called me in the middle of my history class. Her ringtone at the time was just a clip of her screaming “Bread”.

How my teacher didn’t figure out who’s phone it was is beyond me.

Trey : Made Russian Roulette Spilt Cupcakes for a large group of my friends, and one is allergic to strawberries, while another’s favorite is, so I very specifically placed the strawberry filled one on the complete other side of the table with the intention of slipping it in after she picked her two.

Some fucking how, she ended up with the Strawberry one, which I had tied with a bow (basically the ones with bows mean they contain an allergen, and the color is the allergen. Ex: Strawberry was BRIGHT FUCKING PINK.) I’m to this day not exactly sure how, but my best guess is she traded hers with whoever originally got the Strawberry one before we ate.

Luckily, I told her partner, who had been my baking partner in crime and convinced me to add in the strawberry after I said it might be a bad idea, to bring two epi pens just incase.

Riddle : I am around 5’3, and I had a friend (?) who was 6’2-3 in middle school. We had almost the blatant definition of a Floyd and Riddle Dynamic, but he’d out of the blue be extremely sweet to me (kinda like that comic in the anthology), only on days I was going through shit. When I tell you I genuinely thought I was hallucinating when he did though-

Also, I yelled at him for nailing, yes, NAILING, a flag on the ceiling reading :”el sábado es para los chicos” (Saturday is for the boys) In the fucking Spanish classroom. Since nobody was as tall as him and the janitors didn’t notice it, it was there for like a week.

Che’nya : My friend and I have an ongoing inside joke where whenever we spot the other through a window in the hallway, we text the other “behind you” or “to your__”

Leona : I brought a pillow with a silk pillow case (gift from my mom) to a sleepover once, and my friend went “You trust leaving me in the room with this?” and I genuinely responded “Its a pillow, why wouldn’t I trust you.” entirely forgetting that Silk can be pretty expensive.

I felt so bad bro.

Ruggie : My friend once dared me to get a one plate of everything during a party. I misinterpreted this and brought a mostly to full plate of each thing, including water bottles.

Turns out they meant balance one of everything on a single plate.

I did not, infact, return the seven brownies, four cupcakes, two cookies, twelevish tangerines, popcorn and god knows how many grapes, but everything else was returned or snatched by friends.

Jack: My friend was throughly convinced she knew where she was going when we got lost outside at one of the biggest malls in fucking America, and we ended up walking a good 4/6th of the perimeter before finding the target (the store, we were still fucking lost) , which we called her mom to pick us up at.

Bonus: My friend, a few dormmates and I were at Starbucks and this random woman comes up to my friend and goes “Hey, they got my order wrong, want my drink?” and I was literally trying to give him this face of “BAD IDEA”. Yea so he ignored the obvious and drank the whole fucking thing and was bouncing off the walls for the rest of the day. (This one could also work for Jamil I suppose.)

Floyd : I was once walking with a friend of mine and jokingly said Trees are giant salads.

This motherfucker breaks off a branch of the nearest tree, takes a fatass bite, drops it, and goes “I want a refund.”

Jade : Randomly got interrogated my mushroom hunters—-

(I kind you the fuck not, MUSHROOM. HUNTERS. Basically, they go out to hunt/find/ forage for rare mushrooms. Atleast thats what they told us?! I wasn’t paying much attention, I was busy petting their dog tbh)

—While camping, my friend and I had zero clue what they were talking about, so she just pointed in a random direction and they thanked us and left.

The same friend also introduced me to mica, but always called them Mermaid Scales, and we more than once walked around in the water looking for them, I was the only one that would literally stop mid-trail to pick some up though. I have a massive collection.

Also she never let me live down the fact I once trapped myself in my tent with fucking dental floss overnight just to see if I could, then couldn’t undo it in the morning, and our adult / guide / trying to keep us alive person had to cut me out with a knife.

Azul : This one very specific time as a kid I was talking to two identical twins, who were standing on each side of me, wearing the same outfits but color reversed, and nearly had an internal breakdown trying to remember which was which, so I just did verbal gymnastics around using their names.

We later literally spent two hours fighting for ours lives together and I shit you not I STILL COULDNT REMEMBER THEIR FUCKING NAMES.

Kalim : Went shopping with my badass grandma and somehow left with a Second Hand Valentino (the brand) dress for $50 and a free bracelet one of the employees gave me because ….I actually don’t know.

Also, I got trapped on a really high up indoor water slide with my sister because the water entirely stopped (we learned later the water machine tied to that ride blew up) , and where we were was like a weird slope like between two drops. We couldn’t get back up, and going down was too risky without water bcs we could go splat.

There was like a window ish on the ride, so like a smart 8 year old, I start calling for help at the top of my lungs. My sister (10) also did this. There was this guy who I guess heard us that we nicknamed Chad because he looked like the most stereotypical 2000’s beach movie love interest lifeguard and was dramatically looking around for where the voices were coming from but NEVER LOOKED UP??

Anyway, My sister got us out in the end because she found a hatch and managed to open it, and I shit you not there was a spiral staircase with a gigantic fucking sign reading “DO NOT CLIMB STAIRCASE.”

So obviously, my sister chucks me across the gap onto the staircase and then jumps over herself, and we end up spending another 40 minutes after that fiasco trying to find our parents while i’m pretty sure Chad was trying to find us.

After the 40 minutes we just assumed we were now orphans and went back to where we left our keycard and low and behold our parents had just come back from wherever they had fucked off to.

Also Chad found us and felt super bad, and bought us a smore cake?!? Someone throw him back in time to be his destined role as an extra in Teen Beach Movie. The cake was great though, but that was one hell of an 8th birthday lmao.

Jamil : My friend from India (jokily) Divorced me after my dumbass asked her if Chai was an ingredient used in Chai Tea.

Spoiler Alert : Chai IS THE TEA. Apparently, asking for Chai Tea is the equivalent of saying “Can I have some Tea Tea please.”

Yea safe to say I felt real stupid in that moment.

Epel : My sister once locked me in the bathroom so she could test her new makeup on me. She left for one second and I kid you not I snuck out of the window.

Random bonus : Me and my cousins for some reason ended up roughhousing outside after one of our older cousins weddings, and I judo flipped a whole ass 17 year old man at age 12 and I felt so powerful in that moment.

Also If you saw about the ranch in the previous post, me that gang had an anonymous cookie provider who would leave us two tins of fresh cookies every day around 12ish pm, usually behind the kitchen or outside the equipment shack.

Yes, we tried to catch them once, No, we didn’t succeed. Also nobody wanted to risk loosing cookie privileges, so we didn’t try again.

Rook: Once scared the living shit out of my online friend by texting him “I am now several miles closer to your location.” . He lives in South America, and I happened to be in Florida with a friend, so I thought i’d be funny.

Vil : I was going to a cosplay convention with a friend, and instead of bringing like a normal amount of makeup, my indecisive ass brought basically a whole suitcase worth of it.

Also won a costume competition at my boarding school for Halloween, and wasn’t even aware there was a competition until the year after, when a good half or more of my dormmates asked me to do their makeup because they’d heard I was really good at it.

Idia: Ok, so, long story, but my friend invited me and two mutual friends to see Sweeney Todd on Broadway w/ the og cast. However, I was the only one who didn’t know we were going anywhere, because he thought his mom told my dad we were going to see Sweeney Todd, while my dad thought my friend told me, but also he was suspiciously alluding to it, maybe unintentionally

So I show up in a blue hoodie with a bad pun on it, mildly ripped sweatpants, mismatched socks and bright rainbow crocs. Not very “going to watch a musical about cannibalism and Serial Killers” attire. But it gets worse.

So around the 3/4ths into the first act is when I usually get snacks at musicals or plays, since they’re usually just finished setting up and theres no line, so I’m in and out and don’t miss much.

Well, I did that as usual, and its important to know we had front row balcony seats, because…

I slipped on my friends playbill on the way to my seat, and my fucking left croc went flying down into the seats below us, and hit an older woman in the head right at Sweeney did the first oofing, and the stage lights go red for a moment in this scene.

I felt so bad, and was literally too embarrassed to go get the shoe myself, so one of my friends got it for me. Apparently the lady thought it was somewhat funny (thank fucking goodness)

Ortho : My sister and I were biking once, and found out some reason the coats we had (school merch from field day I think). had the biggest fucking hidden pockets known to man.

So the next time we went out, she for some reason decided to put our dads entire laptop in there.

Also bonus: My friend once invited me over to their house to help with their costume, and when I came over, the costume was literally a gigantic trash can. No, not the actual object, They were literally making a giant trashcan costume.

I helped but still remained mildly confused in the process.

Malleus : I had a good friend who lived next to a graveyard, and sometimes we would just go on nice walks in the graveyard.

Lilia: Another Wilderness one: We were making Pasta, and one of the guys in our group was playing with a large thing of moss, tripped, and the moss got into the fucking pasta.

One guide said “Nature Consequence, we can still eat it” while the other screamed they were going to get fired.

Also, me and a friend were singing bo-burnham on a hike, and for some reason we had this stupid ass idea of making a fake fishing rod called…..

“The Child Catcher.”

(The irony ony of us both being 14 at the time so technically we were children)

We found a good fishing rod like stick and a vine, tied a vine on, and I kid you not we carried that thing for MILES. We also made a fork with a flatly shaped stick and a rock named Reddie.

Yea living in the woods does somethin to ya I gotta say.

Bonus: One of my childhood friends had a very giant dog, and one time we had a sleepover, she was laying infront of the other side of the door when we woke , and because of the way the door was, we couldn’t get through.

So my genius solution was to climb out the window (this was on the second floor) , Cha-Cha real smoothed to the nearest other window, go through there, and lure the dog away with a treat.

It worked.

Silver: Went to this make your own dipped popsicle thing with a good friend of mine, and watched in pure horror as she got a mango popsicle dipped in dark chocolate and rolled in fruity pebbles.

Another one: I was at a Sleepover and there was this tent like thing that was meant for tiny people (aka me, not really it was for toddlers but I was small enough to fit at the time), and at some point in the middle of the night, someone tripped on the tent and it entirely collapsed on me, and not only did I sleep through it, I ended up being the last person to wake up because they all saw the tent collapsed and assumed I was already awake.

Also I was camping once and I rolled away from my tarp and somehow down a road, and my friend said when she found me there was just several butterflies and caterpillars on me. I originally didn’t know but I found a caterpillar on my head that morning and apparently it was poisonous (I was fine and I named him Bob)

Sebek: I was in an escape room with some friends, and I discovered that a key we had gotten in the very beginning worked on another lock, so I did that, and later one of my loud friends finds a key and is SPIRALING because she can’t find what it unlocks for like 30 minutes, and after several minutes I realized, unintentionally slammed my hand on a desk and screamed “OH SHIT.” with zero context.

That experience was actually my first time in a escape room with friends, and not my family or a bunch of drunk strangers in suits + my concerned mother.

Second years : My friends in the priorly mentioned group consisted of who I’ll call N, who was doing 70% of the work, we had R, who was angrily searching for the lock to the key, we had T, the birthday boi, who was randomly making jokes about the 1930s, S, who genuinely forgot he had a key item in his pocket, and A, who dramatically serenaded the paintings after misinterpreting a clue and me, who kept accidentally unlocking shit ahead of time.

Third Years: Prior to the other mentioned event, we had gone to a small improv event that ended up being just us, and the poor guy running it kept giving us scenarios and random conditions which we would absolutely make the craziest shit from.

If I remember correctly, one of the skits was we were supposed to be a school board, and the condition was when someone said an idea, you had to say yes.

The result? a organ harvesting business thats front was a school, and everytime someone got detention, one organ of theirs was sold, and the funds went into funding the biogenetically engineered creation of Hatsune Miku and Cat Boys.

For some reason this skit also led somehow into atomic glitter and cocaine missiles, selling souls on Ebay with express shipping, using Sephora Products and Instagram to spread our propaganda, making meme complications of our crimes, and nuking the Bermuda Triangle.

Ask no questions because I have no answers.

——————————-

Yea thats it for now! Enjoy!

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jessconsumesmedia · 1 month ago

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CBS Ghosts 4x08 and 4x09

Hello so this is gonna be Two parts because the episode was two parts so get ready to listen to me twice (I mean or not that is fine too) (HI THIS IS SO LATE I KEEP WRITING ON IT AND THEN GETTING BUSY!)

Also they are not broken up by episode they are broken up by storyline cause I’m pretty sure like most of the next post will be me freaking about H-money snippets.

Tis the season to freak the fuck out about fictional characters :)

Festive spoilers ahead

Ok so quick overview I fucking loved this episode. Like genuinely it had so much going on and it scratched a very specific itch in my little tv fueled brain.

Sassapis is a 500 Year Old Virgin

Awesome actually that’s what I figured. I kinda love the idea that he is ace and just is not a fan. Thor tried so hard to keep his secret he really did he doesn’t really know how relationships actually work. He also really did not need to add that whole still a virgin after death he really coulda just left it and flower probably woulda forgot lol. Flower also does not know how relationships work so her saying he had to tell her was a bit rough but I am glad that we keep seeing parts of these characters that show how grey they really are. CAROL I genuinely love how insane she is like when we see her she makes me giggle like a mad woman so her being like “you can’t handle this” like that woman is a FREAK. And you know what good for her. (I also kinda hate her cause she’s terrible but it’s like fun hate)

SASS AND THOR ARE BEST FRIENDS I WILL SOB. It stands to reason that Thor would have learned Lenape but having the confirmation is lovely. I really enjoyed that they were like little toddlers yes in fact I do want to go see a moose carcass we’re besties now. It is so sweet.

Double Possession/Sam and the Core Four

Oh my god. Rose’s Nancy impression is probably like one of the funniest and best impressions. Like she nailed it. It even sounds like her! The basement ghosts probably should have warned them they know they aren’t that smart but oh well. Nancy being the reason that Champa likes Sam is hilarious like she is actually going insane and that is what you like. I feel bad that Sam was excluded for so long but after she finally is I think she has a better chance at bonding. Rip the car though Nancy was really not very nice for that. Jay telling his mom to chill and try to be mean is very wife guy of him. I’m probably forgetting things now cause it’s been a few days but I really loved that Sam got added and I love that we met Jays family (also his full first name is Jayanth idk why I just automatically assumed it was just Jay but it’s a very good name) and now this post is incredibly long so I am going to stick Jays relationship to his dad in part two lol.

Also absolutely crazy random tangent but I just learned Hetty’s middle name is Eleanor and I just like that.

Anyway part two will exist sometime soon hopefully but I am also going on a study abroad trip for like two weeks so I will be very busy. So idk

Here’s a picture of Trevor that I think is funny

-Jess 💖

#cbs ghosts #trevor lefkowitz #ghosts #ghosts cbs #hetty woodstone #issac higgintoot #jay arondekar #sam arondekar #pete martino #sassapis #flower montero #thorfinn

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phantaloon · 1 year ago

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okay okay im finally finished with both eps and here's my genuine opinion

the cast is 10/10, every single one of these kids knows exactly what they're doing and WHO they are, i can't imagine anyone playing each character better than them

the slight change in Sally and gabe's dynamic gave me a bit of whiplash at first, but the second time watching it, i kinda really dig it better than the books

the way they're portraying percy's feelings of inadequacy and the whole "i know I'm broken, i don't need you to make up stories for me"? fucking devastating, but it fits so fucking well (i can't remember if this is shown as deeply as it's shown here)

sally jackson is the most badass mfer and i fucking love her she is the godly parent fuck poseidon

it's been said before but sally calling percy perseus when she wants him to listen >>>

LOVED how they gave us the impression of percy having riptide while facing the minotaur, only for them to take it away (not really but percy didn't know that) and having percy face the minotaur book style rather than movie style

ANNABETH SAYING PERCY MUST BE THE ONE I SCREAMED

i am fucking loving the way they're doing percy's rage, like maybe it's bc i don't remember it as clearly in the books, but it's so raw, and walker does an amazing job portraying it, but the whole part where he offers food (a thing meant to be for gods) to SALLY, king behavior fr, and that monolog about making his father see them?? actual goosebumps

leah does such an amazing job portraying annabeth's indifference and apparent arrogance, i can't explain how much i love her, like she does it so subtly, it's just little gestures, but she IS annabeth chase (this felt especially cooler after seeing her in interviews, where she's actually really shy irl)

im not going to lie here, and like im sure it was done on purpose anyway, but i am feeling it kinda rushed, and I get it really! they won't waste time in the many chapters spent during camp introducing the world to us, when they've got few episodes, and the whole quest to showcase instead, but like, i would have loved to see percy training with luke (and besting him) and annabeth showing percy around camp (second time we've missed that) and idk just some fun little details, but like i said, i understand why they HAD to rush the intro, so I'm not upset about it or disappointed, just smth to notice

having said that, i really did love the bit of luke guiding percy through several activities trying to figure out his "calling", the callback to percy's horrible archery skills is 10/10

annabeth's yankees cap is fr a yankees cap and im crying

i nearly forgot, but im loving the nightmare sequences, i love how they're keeping the "voice" so faceless and shapeless, but just a light in the darkness of a nightmare, and really it's a great figure, bc a light in a nightmare is usually a good thing, it's the thing you run towards, and it's usually smth that helps you, but here, the light in the darkness is anything but good (quite literally) and he literally taunts percy, and fuels his fear and bitterness, and ugh I love it

the whole capture the flag sequence is 10/10 as well, i can't explain how much this healed me, just like annabeth leaving percy to be bored to death on his own, when she was right there, the transition between luke's "percy's got this" and percy doing the fucking floss dance? cinematic masterpiece, and like the fight sequence was really well done and crafted much much better than many others that rely on slow mo or weird angles, like the fight with clarisse and her spear was gold

dior's scream as percy breaks clarisse's spear alone deserves an emmy

leah portrays annabeth so effortlessly and naturally, I've said it before but i love her

i got like 10 seconds of annabeth interacting with percy and i can already see them together forever ahdjdj

overall 10/10 will rewatch again and again and again bc I'm in fucking love even if it does feel a bit rushed at times and there was the same lack of the hellhound as the movie

#pjo #pjo show #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo tv show #pjo tv series

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sweet-as-an-angel · 1 year ago

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Hi!!! I’m the same guy as the one that asked about the age range and autism :] just having like another question or so idk I forgot tbh.

Again, it’s so okay if you don’t wanna answer any of these!! I completely get it, all is well 🫶🫶

Would Dominic have any reaction to a reader that stims a lot?? Either verbally or physically; maybe his adoration will miau like a cat as a vocal stim frequently or flap their hands or clap as a physical stim as well?? Would he do anything now that he has that knowledge??

If his obsession suffered from OCD, how would he exploit that disorder?? (under the impression that he would exploit it.) Perhaps their ocd revolves around severe obsessions of having something seriously wrong with them, paranoia, or extreme fear of dirt or contamination??

Can he speak another language?? If his adoration was bilingual would he put genuine effort into learning their mother language??

Would he find it disrespectful if his obsession was eye contact adverse?? Actually what things does he find disrespectful like in general?? Does he do anything to correct that behavior??

Would he be okay with them being like incredibly and insanely cuddly and touchy?? I am autistic myself and when I go nonverbal but can still stand touch it’s how I communicate if that makes sense at all??

OKOK I swear that’s it for at least a while 😭�� he really has me thinking about things jesus christ man. If there’s any spelling mistakes or something you don’t understand, I’m sorry :[[ German is my first language.

Have a great day or night!! I wasn’t expecting to write this much ngl🫶🫶

In case I ever have anything else I’ll put a raccoon at the end!! :]]

-🦝

TW: Discussions of Mental Health, Mentions of OCD, Dominic Being Dominic

Welcome back, my dear 🦝 Anon <3 ! Your English is perfect, thank you for all your wonderful questions ^^ ! To answer your inquiries:

♡ If Reader stims a lot, Dominic will, of course, try to find a way to make your stimming all about him; especially if you have a lot of physical/verbal stims. He'll try to be in close proximity to you so that, when you do stim, you're more likely to either catch/grab him (unintentionally, of course). If you're apologetic - even though it isn't your fault - Dominic will absolutely find a way to guilt you into feeling bad about it, even when his veneer tells you that it's fine, it happens.

♡ Guilt breeds indebtedness - that's what Dominic has discovered. So, fresh off the wave of panic you're feeling, he'll ask you to do something for him that will require you to stay longer, during which time he'll see if you physically stim again or not. If so, he refreshes the process. Just like printing money.

♡ If you verbally stim and, say, make some kind of animal noise, he'll absolutely try and romanticise it. If you meow, he'll call you "Kitty," giving you a warm smile and a good-natured laugh. If/when you become more comfortable around him, he'll start calling you "Mon Minou," - My Kitty. He's one Discord server away from calling you Kitten.

♡ If you suffer with OCD, he'll start manipulating the physical environment to trigger you. Never in his own house, though. You need someplace as your safe space, right?

♡ He'll never verbally trigger you himself, either; nor will he allow any triggers to exist in his house as to try and reduce the likelihood of you having a negative association with his abode if you experience an OCD urge whilst you're there, regardless of how severe it is.

♡ In fact, he'll do things to make it seem like he's the only one that can combat it; he'll check windows to make sure they're locked, he'll sweep up crumbs off the floor to clear the path for you, he'll even call up one of his many doctor 'friends' (acquaintances. People in high places he's fashioned into his elite social circle) to come and informally examine you, to tell you that you're fine.

♡ If it's paranoia you're afflicted with, he'll seize the opportunity to turn himself into the only person you can come to, the only person you don't feel silly or afraid to spill your deepest worries to.

♡ Anything that will make you gaze up at him with nothing less than gratitude.

♡ Dominic can speak two languages fluently - English and French. He can speak other European and Asian languages, too, but to a minimal degree and only enough to discuss business matters. However, if you speak another language aside from the two he already has at his disposal, he'll absolutely make sure to learn it fluently, if only to become one of the few/only people in the neighbourhood with whom you can feel truly connected with.

♡ For peak manipulation, he'll learn everything about your mother tongue after your first meeting and start speaking to you in it - fluently - the next time you meet, pretending to have been able to speak it for many years past.

♡ If you are eye contact adverse, he'll try not to take it personally. But, knowing Dominic, that is a feat in and of itself. He values being able to exert power over others, and one of his main methods of doing so is unwavering eye contact. So, really, you're managing to inadvertently protect yourself from Dominic's Medusa stare.

♡ Behaviours Dominic views as 'disrespectful' would be signs dismissiveness towards him. Dominic is used to being the centre of attention in every environment he's in, so to have you, the object of his every desire, not paying attention to him is...a blow to his ego, to say the least. A metal rod to the backbone of his entire identity.

♡ Dominic will make quick work of ‘correcting’ your behaviour: standing so that it is only him in your direct line of sight; coming in close proximity so you can’t be ignorant to his presence; and, if he's bold enough, taking your chin between his fingers and making you look at up him.

♡ If you're very touchy-feely, Dominic goes absolutely feral; he can't believe he gets to have you touch him without: a.) having to initiate it, and b.) having to hide it. After all, it's a by-product of your mental health - it's beyond your control as much as it is his!

♡ He'll take full advantage of this, too, offering his arm for you to hang onto, his hand to hold, his chest to hide your face in. And all the while, all he's thinking of is how nice it feels not only to have you so close to him, but also how he can use this as an excuse to keep you close in the future.

Masterlist Yandere AI Masterlist Masterpost

AO3 Wattpad Tumblr Backup Account

#sweet as an angel #yandere #male yandere #yandere male #original yandere #yandere oc #yandere oc x reader #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere x y/n #yandere x darling #yandere dilf #yandere dilf x reader #yandere writing #yandere blog #yandere headcanons

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darkbluekies · 9 months ago

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Hello 🧐 saw that rude comment of an anon and... manners????💀 I really hope that was just a very poor worded comment and not meant like that!

Never get down with such comments! You're writing is legitimate perfect and perfection does take its time!

And MAY I ADD that you also didn't just left, but taking your time to interact with us daily and try to catch up asks and such!

youre are OBVIOUSLY very diligent and VERY patient ❤❤❤ PLUS the long ocean liner story??!!! HELLOOO???!

Yeah, I rest my case. One of the BEST and my most favourite hobby authors ngl! I am actually a very picky reader, rarely there are stories on the internet that keeps me interested and wanting for more 😍 And here are the crack stuff you asked for lol

Just a sneeze... Kry won't rest until darling literally does...

I forgot Krys glasses in the last one 😪

Darling stole the maid apron btw...

And this one was dedicated to one of your answers about a Hedwigs ask :3 where anon described how secretly scary Hedwig is bc you dont realise her intentions until its too late. And your answer's ending where you described darling being genuine and not having the urge to impress her like others made me think that a frugal!darling would be the most funniest partner for Hedwig lol. Someone who just doesnt want to spend money excessively despite its there... yeah have fun Hedwig! Mwah! :D

so yeah, that slap was personal too lmao, I dont trust a robot vaccum cleaner to be reliable XDD i am sorta a clean addict ^^

I have another one but that is wayyyyy too long and messy to finish it, in general these sketches are a hot mess (i apologize, I normally never post such unfinished wips but I hope you still had fun. Imma show you the other sketch per chat though :p)

Haha omg no these are fantastic what the hell? I laughed out loud in public and now people probably wonder what tf I'm doing😅 I love these so much. I'm not going to lie however, I thought it was Silas in the second comic before I read the explanation. Which means that I was totally fine with him wearing a maid apron. I do not know how to feel about that ...

Fun story, we own a robot vacuum that is ass, and one day it just ... disappeared? Literally grew legs and walked away. I looked for 30 minutes after that damn thing. IT HAD HIDDEN ITSELF UNDER MY MOTHERS FUCKING WARDROBE ... ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE APARTMENT?

I see that you've sent a private message so I'm going to take a peak right after this!!

I'm sure the anon used the wrong wording! But they're getting a story later on today so I hope that will satisfy them :) but thank you so much for your nice words, they warmed my heart🥹🫶🏻🩷

#missmerymoon #yandere oc art

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ineffablenlghtingales · 7 months ago

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Oh my, the flashback of Crowley and Aziraphale before the beginning of everything. Angel!Crowley is so adorable. Those little squeaks of delight when he's making the stars...

Aziraphale ends up popping his happiness when he mentions the plans that the universe and all of that is supposed to end in about six thousand years. Then Crowley's understandably upset but just asks (with genuine desire to know, I think) “How much trouble can I get into just asking a few questions?” Okay so I know I asked earlier about Crowley's Fall and y'all said it was implied in one way or another. Was his Fall because he dared to question the Almighty's plans and by those questions seemed to go against the great plan? Because if so, that isn't fair and I don't think Crowley deserved to be cast from Heaven into boiling pools of sulfur and condemned to an eternity as a demon just because he didn't understand the point of creating something so beautiful that would only be destroyed in the blink of an eye. (Another thing I could probably write more about at some later point...)

Then we're brought to present-day London where Crowley meets Shax (hm I decided I don't really like her.) So as I understand it, she's taken Crowley's place as Hell's ambassador? (Did I miss something in S1 or was it explicitly said that Crowley was Hell's ambassador on earth bec it was news to me). I love how Crowley just doesn't give a shit at all.

Memory-wiped Gabriel shows up in his skivvies and I felt sorry for Aziraphale and the massive headache he must have had dealing with him. But I loved John Hamm's performance. Like Gabriel is kind of stupid but not so much stupid as his head is just empty of everything.

Ever the one to help people in need, Azi lets him in, gives him a blanket and tries to figure out what the heaven is going on. Okay, but “You know what it’s like when you don’t know anything at all but you’re totally certain that everything would be better if you were near one particular person?” had me. Azi reacted a little bit too strongly to that, and are we to understand that he's denying the fact that Crowley happens to be that person for him? Open your eyes, dear Azi. Don't deny it, love. Then Gabriel, mentions that “something terrible” might happen and there’s a “thing” he’s supposed to give Aziraphale. The thing turns out to be an empty cardboard box.

Then, one of my favorite scenes. Crowley loses his shit when he sees Gabriel, and you see the poor demon is very much startled.

Crowley (very angry and confused): What's he doing here? Aziraphale: I don't know. Crowley (not impressed): Ask him! Aziraphale (helplessly): He doesn't know either. Crowley (really very much not impressed) *growls*: Ask him, properly! Crowley (to Gabriel): WHAT. ARE. YOU. DOING. IN. THIS. BOOK-SHOP-PAH. (makes sure to pop that 'p') Gabriel (a little bit confused): I. Am. Dusting. *Waves the duster in the air)

Then the goose chase for Gabriel begins, Crowley is dragged back to Hell and gets threatened a bit by Beelzebub. Oh! I almost forgot. Crowley gets so mad he electrocutes himself. It was kind of funny. Like I loved how he's stalking out of the bookshop trying (not very hard maybe) to control his anger, and then he starts smoking. Then he shakes and gives up. "I can't do this. I'm so angry!" and yep, electrocutes himself also locking Maggie and Nina in their shop.

Crowley eventually frees the women with a snap of his fingers and goes back to apologize to Azi. But the angel wants the "I Was Wrong Dance” before he’ll forgive his friend for ditching him — and though Crowley is not so okay with that, he does it in the end with this fantastic flourish and bow at the end. Excuse me, sir.

So then they put their heads together and try to figure out what to do about Gabriel and decide to each do half a miracle to hide the amnesiac archangel. They do and are pretty convinced it works. BUT it sets off big alarms in Heaven, whoops.

Recap for 2x02 to come tomorrow, hopefully!

Next episode's recap ➵

#good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #david tennant #michael sheen #go recaps

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rubykgrant · 9 months ago

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(a little thing I wrote for a bigger fic, but I like how absolutely nonsensical Jon and Martin's "meet-cute" was, and now Jon gets to let Martin know the secret dorky side he's been hiding behind his very serious attitude~)

“If you don’t mind me being blunt?”

“By all means,” Jon encourages him.

“When exactly did you start to notice me- that is, notice that you found me attractive?”

“Oh, well… haha, um- that actually happened almost right away…” Jon’s mouth makes that flat little smirk that means he’s mildly embarrassed.

“Right away? Oh, come on…” Martin has trouble believing that.

“No, honestly. Before I really even knew you, before I convinced myself you were the bane of my existence, my very FIRST thought when I saw you was- he’s lovely,”

“You’re just trying to butter me up!” Martin argues, but feels himself blushing. Just barely.

“Hmm, ‘lovely’ was the first WORD that formed in my head. I suppose my other thoughts were less articulate,” Jon doesn’t elaborate on that (only twice had he allowed himself to gush about his early thoughts regarding Martin, which never really went away; once to Georgie, once to Daisy. Georgie had called him a sap, and Daisy had called him unhinged. He wonders what they would have both said together, if they’d had the chance to compare notes).

Martin continues to shake his head, unconvinced.

Jon thinks this over.

“Do you remember when we met?” Jon asks, leaning beside Martin at the sink; his body-language looks like somebody at a pub, about to drop what they believe to be a winner of a pick-up line.

“Yes, unfortunately. I think we BOTH made pretty strong first-impressions on each other,” Martin replies.

“Mmm, very much so. But- when you first ran up, and asked if I had seen a dog? I thought you were trying to tell me a joke,”

“You thought- what? A joke?” Martin turns to look at Jon.

“A joke. I was surprised right out of my train of thought, forgot about whatever I had been doing, forgot to keep my aloof and serious attitude as the new Head Archivist. I didn’t know what to think, and I was so taken off-guard, it made me genuinely intrigued. I was even excited to see if I could figure out the joke, be all impressive and clever. But then…” Jon trailed off, rolling his eyes.

“Then I made it clear- an actual dog was running around inside the building,” Martin finished. “Honestly Jon, what kind of joke could that have been?”

“Hmm… have you seen a dog? I was hoping somebody could help me SPOT one,” Jon answers. Martin’s jaw drops. That was indeed a terrible pun… but Jon isn’t finished. “Have you seen a dog? I CANINE find it anywhere! Have you seen a dog? I’m having a RUFF time looking on my own! Have you seen a dog? I’ve searched this place a HOUND-dred times! Have you seen a dog? This one is im-PAW-sible for me to find! Have you seen a dog? I’m worried it might be in GREAT DANE-ger! Have you seen-”

“STOP, HAHAHA, STOP- YOU’RE GONNA KILL ME!” Martin doubles-over, and slides down against the cupboards under the sink. He’s laughing so hard he’s crying, and his cheeks hurt from smiling.

“Terrible puns aside, my first thoughts of you were- Oh, somebody is talking to me? Oh, he’s telling me a joke? Oh, he’s lovely. Oh, I can impress this lovely man when he sees how good I am at figuring out jokes! OH, HE LET A DOG INTO THE BUILDING!”

Martin laughs again, helplessly hiding his face in his knees. Jon steps away from the sink, crouching down in front of him. Martin continues to giggle, peeking through his fingers as Jon lightly strokes his hair.

“Is that what I should have done? Won your heart with bad puns?” Martin asks.

“I’m not sure I’m much of a prize, but you certainly won my heart, regardless. The problem was ME, almost everything about you kept catching my attention, I just had my head up my own arse. I’m not good enough for you,” Jon answers. Martin finally moves his hands away from his face, catching Jon’s with his own.

“Maybe you just need to step-up and BE good enough for me?”

“I can try,” Jon says with a smile that implies he’s actually determined to do exactly that. Martin leans forward and kisses him.

#the magnus archives #tma #jonmartin #jmart

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hannyhann · 2 months ago

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skz bias - first impressions

hi guys <33 it’s been a minute !! I had an idea that I thought would be cute , as either a thread or comments. I thought about hearing how yall first found ur bias for skz!! <33 I’m gonna tell mine below! feel free to leave urs

if you’re not a fan of skz, just tell the story of how you found ur ult bias! if you don’t have a bias in skz, tell me how you found the group :3

I remember the first time I listened to stray kids was in 2020, it was the middle of the pandemic and I had been deep into my bts phase (still am). I was trying to branch out in kpop, since the only groups I were a fan of were bts and black pink.

I was sifting through kpop playlists and came across a song called “Gods Menu” as it was late at night and 15 year old me was trying to keep the volume low. quarantine times am I right? I remember never hearing anything like stray kids before.

I stayed up all night listening to stray kids music, however ultimately I forgot about stanning them or learning the members until a few months later as I was going through a depression spell. I wouldn’t come across stray kids again until april of 2021. I still kept up, but again I didn’t know any members except for felix. however that would quickly change.

I was on vacation in april of 2021 and I’m watching some bts videos when the person that made the videos mentions someone named “bang chan.” I was like “bang chan? why does that name sound familiar.” so I looked him up and these were the first images I have ever seen of him

sure i knew he was in stray kids but i never learned all of the members until then. but chris looked so gorgeous. I had never seen anyone so handsome. I couldn’t tell you what it was but my depression spell seemed to ease away. I was watching videos of him, interviews, early videos from back in the day when he was training. he inspired me to do well in school, get back into my friends, studies, and take care of those important around me.

the thing that stood out the most for me was when he said “don’t hurt yourself.” which at that point I wanted to because of my depression, a horrible breakup, and I had been graped and SA’d that year and previous so the last thing I wanted was to be alive in those months. however, as corny as it may seem, those words stopped me from hurting myself. it took a long time to heal, but I always had it in the back of my mind.

chris inspired me to go to therapy and talk to professional help about what I was going through. I would always watch his live stream rooms and they would heal me. chris is such a wonderful human being and a beautiful individual. he saved me <33 things happen for a reason and me finding him was what healed me.

stray kids and especially chris as a whole have healed me. they hold a special place in my heart and I will always be grateful for them.

I was heartbroken when I couldn’t get to see them during their maniac tour and the last time they were in the states. however I am happy to say that after 5 years I will be seeing them in atlanta on june 10th, 2025. I can’t contain my excitement, I genuinely got emotional when I got the tickets.

chris, bang chan, chris bahng has healed me in ways I cannot explain. it’ll probably never happen, but if I ever get to meet him I would hug him and genuinely say thank you. having that comfort person is never a silly thing, because deep down that comfort person has saved you more times over. whether that be an idol, actor, celebrity, religious figure, parent, guardian, or friend. if you have that comfort and help, you are valid <33

(credit to any original creators of pictures, besides photos of me lol)

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oliverreedmasterass · 9 months ago

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Synopsis: The members of Greta Van Fleet agree to do an interview with the Human Napkin himself, Nardwuar, and find themselves ridiculously unprepared for his interview style.

Words: 2k

Warnings: language, some sexual innuendos (kinda?), mentions of stalking, the void™️

Notes: Shoutout to @skywaydrifter for the amazing fic idea, and sending me down a wild Nardwuar binge-fest

----------------------------------------------

Nardwuar theme plays with the animated intro video. The shot opens to show NARDWUAR standing in front of an impressive display of vinyl records, next to JOSH KISZKA.

NARDWUAR: How are you?

Nardwuar shoves his microphone into Josh’s face. Josh flinches back a bit, but then leans into the microphone.

JOSH: Absolutely groovy.

NARDWUAR: Tell me who you are.

JOSH: That’s a bit of a loaded question. I’m a dreamer, a mere mortal, a man with a dream…

NARDWUAR: Your name.

JOSH: Oh. Josh Kiszka. Frontman for the group, Greta Van Fleet.

Josh curtsies to the camera.

NARDWUAR: Welcome to Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. And right off the bat, I have a gift for ya.

JOSH puts a hand over his heart and looks at the camera in shock.

JOSH: Now I feel bad, I didn’t bring you anything.

NARDWUAR (continued): I’ve got this 1966 album, All About Miriam.

JOSH: (taking the album and cradling it in his arms) Oh my goodness.

NARDWUAR: I heard that you’re a fan.

JOSH: Miriam Makeba? Oh yeah, she’s one of my favorites. My parents had a few of her albums that they would play all the time when I was younger. She’s got such a rich voice, I can only dream of sounding like that.

NARDWUAR: But you do have a pretty distinct voice that I’m sure a lot of people are jealous of. How did you find that sound?

JOSH: I started screaming and then I guess I kind of found my way, eventually. (chuckles) No, but actually, my vocal coach, Ron, I call him “The Master” because he genuinely saved my vocal cords. I wouldn’t be where I am today without him.

NARDWUAR: How do you do it? Is it special vocal warmups? Some kind of mystery technique?

JOSH: Well, you see, if I told you, I’d have to kill you.

NARDWUAR: I’ve got another gift for you here, Josh.

JOSH: Oh god, now I feel super bad.

NARDWUAR: Costumes are a big part of your stage presence. Here, I’ve got a piece that might look familiar to you.

Nardwuar holds out Josh’s infamous golden pants, and Josh reluctantly takes them.

JOSH: Oh boy, I forgot how shiny and see through these were.

NARDWUAR: You wore these in the sweltering sun on the iHeart Radio festival stage in Las Vegas, Nevada on Saturday, September 22, 2018, didn’t you?

JOSH: I’m not sure if these are the exact pair…

NARDWUAR: They are.

JOSH: Huh? Did you dig them out of the dumpster or something?

NARDWUAR: Now, Josh, can you tell me about Sean Reyes?

Josh looks at Nardwuar with intense skepticism.

JAKE: (offscreen) What the fuck?

JOSH: Now how do you know about Sean Reyes?

NARDWUAR: It’s Josh Kiszka trivia!

Josh squints at Nardwuar, uncertain.

JOSH: Sean Reyes was my third grade teacher.

NARDWUAR: And he was the one who encouraged you to write poetry, right?

JOSH: Yes…..

NARDWUAR: Like haikus?

JOSH: Mr. Reyes would play a lot of folk stuff for us, like John Denver, Joni Mitchell, all the classics, and he could tell I really dug it. He pulled me aside after class, showed me some of his favorite lyrics, and explained how it was a form of poetry. I took that to heart and spent a lot of time outside of class writing poems after that.

NARDWUAR: Were they any good?

JOSH: Well, some lines ended up in our songs, so you tell me.

NARDWUAR: Well, I heard your twin brother behind the camera just now. Let’s bring him out here. Come here, Jake!

JAKE joins Josh’s side in front of the camera, looking nervous. He’s wringing his hands, avoiding eye contact with Nardwuar.

NARDWUAR: Hello, Jake.

JAKE: (short) Hi.

NARDWUAR: I have a gift for you.

JAKE: Uh, okay.

NARDWUAR: It’s a poster from H.O.R.D.E. Festival at Deer Creek Music Center in Noblesville, Indiana featuring big names like Blues Traveler, The Black Crowes, and Taj Mahal from 1995. Something important happened at this festival, right?

Jake pales.

JAKE: Uh. Uh.

Josh is staring pretty hard at Nardwuar.

JAKE: (to Josh) There’s no way he knows about that. How could he know about that?

Nardwuar sneaks the microphone closer into Jake’s mouth.

NARDWUAR: Well?

JAKE: Okay, uh, they might kill me for admitting this on camera, but my parents are pretty sure that’s where Josh and I were conceived.

NARDWUAR: Do you like Taj Mahal?

Jake struggles to rebound from that 180.

JAKE: Um (beat) yeah. I’d list him as a big influence.

NARDWUAR: And another gift for Jake Kiszka!

JAKE: (whispering to Josh) This guy freaks me out.

NARDWUAR: Here you go!

Nardwuar tosses Jake a ziploc bag containing something brown. Jake’s reflexes get the better of him and he grabs the bag out of the air, and then blankly studies what’s in his hands.

JAKE: What the actual fuck.

NARDWUAR: Tell me what you’re holding there!

JAKE: Hair. It’s my hair.

JOSH: What??

JAKE: I’m not even joking. This is what they chopped off, like, last year before our second leg of the Dreams in Gold Tour.

JOSH: (growing defensive of his brother) Where did you get that from?

NARDWUAR: What was the reason for the big chop?

JAKE: I could have sworn my hairdresser said she was going to donate that.

NARDWUAR: Oh, she did.

JAKE: I’m sorry, what?

SAM bounds into the scene in front of the camera, looking energetic.

SAM: This is fun! Do me now!

NARDWUAR: Sam Kiszka! Alright, Jake. Thanks and doot doola doot doo…

JAKE: Huh?

NARDWUAR: (finishing for Jake) Doo doo! (turns to Sam) I have a question for you.

Sam is hopping from foot to foot and clapping his hands with glee while Jake confusedly wanders off camera.

SAM: Fire away!

NARDWUAR: Your aunt works at State Farm in Chicago.

DANNY: (offscreen) That’s not a question.

JOSH: How could you possibly know that?

NARDWUAR: Have you ever had to file a claim with her?

SAM: Well, actually one time…

JOSH: Ssh! Don’t tell him anything.

NARDWUAR: (entirely unbothered) I have a gift you might like, Sam!

SAM: Oh my god! You guys aren’t gonna believe this. It’s my birth certificate!

JOSH: What kind of interviewer are you??

NARDWUAR: I’m just a fan, guys, just a fan. I love your music!

Sam’s phone rings.

SAM: Whoops, sorry. I know this is unprofessional but, one sec. I gotta take this.

Instead of going off camera to answer the phone in private like a normal person, Sam answers the phone and puts it on speaker.

SAM (continued): Y’ello?

KAREN: (obviously shaken) Sam?

SAM: Hey Mom, what’s up?

KAREN: Are you boys alright?

Josh grabs the phone from Sam.

JOSH: Mom? What’s going on?

KAREN: Someone broke into our house while your dad and I were on our trip. We’re worried it might have been a stalker since they took a lot of your possessions and some important documents.

JOSH: Oh my god, are you okay?

KAREN: Fine, just a bit shaken up. But, I’m so sorry, they stole Sammy’s birth certificate.

Sam calls into the phone over Josh’s shoulder.

SAM: Don’t worry about it, Mom! I just got it gifted back to me!

Josh hands Sam his phone and rushes away.

JOSH: (screaming offscreen) RICHARD! WE NEED BACKUP!

KAREN: I’m gonna have to call my sister to file a claim. They broke a crazy amount of our windows. Like, way more than they needed to. What a headache.

DANNY: (to Nardwuar) You have a lot of explaining to do.

NARDWUAR: I’ve got a gift for you, Daniel!

Nardwuar pulls out a pack of old Beatles cards.

DANNY: I don’t want it.

NARDWUAR: It’s a pack of 1964 Beatles collector’s cards, in mint condition!

DANNY: Wait, I do want it.

Danny takes the cards from Nardwuar and looks at them with delight.

NARDWUAR: You’re a big fan of the Beatles, right?

DANNY: Oh yeah, I always have been.

JAKE: You’re not seriously continuing this interview.

DANNY: (while opening and flipping through the pack of cards) I mean, this is a pretty cool gift.

JAKE: (evidently at his wit’s end) This guy 100% broke into my family’s house, and he for sure did the same to your parents.

NARDWUAR: Would you say there was a specific Beatles album that most inspired you?

DANNY: Definitely Rubber Soul. I loved hearing them try folk.

Jake throws up his hands in exasperation.

DANNY: Norwegian Wood genuinely changed my life.

NARDWUAR: In what way?

JAKE: Nope, we’re not doing this anymore.

Jake thrusts his finger up into Nardwuar’s face.

JAKE (continued): What else did you take from us, you son of a bitch?

NARDWUAR: Does it count as “taking” if I give it back to you?

JAKE: Yes!

NARDWUAR: I’d beg to differ.

DANNY: (looking through his cards) Woah! I’ve never seen this photo of Ringo Starr before!

Josh comes rushing back to the scene with their bodyguard and pal, RICHARD.

RICHARD: (scanning around on full alert) Where is he?

JOSH: (shrill, pointing at Nardwuar) There!

Nardwuar simply grins at Richard.

NARDWUAR: Can you tell me about Grubbyknot?

Richard is obviously thrown off, and he lets down his guard.

RICHARD: Huh? Grubbyknot? That was my metal band in high school. But we only played like two shows. One was in my parent’s garage.

JOSH: Don’t let him get into your head, Richard! You’re our big guns, we can’t lose you!

SAM: Do you have another gift for me, Nardwuar?

Nardwuar stares at Sam, entirely expressionless.

NARDWUAR: No, I don’t. Doot doola doot doo…

SAM: Doo-doo?

Upon Sam’s words, he vanishes into thin air. Jake is so terrified, he falls to the ground and cowers on the floor.

JAKE: Jesus Christ!

NARDWUAR: I usually like to speak with only 1-2 people at a time on camera. It’s getting a little bit too crowded for me right now.

Nardwuar looks at Danny, whose attention is finally away from his cards, and is gawking at the empty space where Sam was just standing.

NARDWUAR: (continued, making eye contact with Danny) Doot doola doot doo…

Danny stares back at Nardwuar in horror, his mouth sealed shut. Nardwuar sings the little tune again, holding his microphone up to Danny to finish it.

JAKE: (cutting in) Doo doo! (beat) Fuck!

Jake disappears.

JOSH: (explaining to Richard and Danny) He has this condition where he can’t handle hearing an unfinished tune. Poor guy has a curse.

NARDWUAR: Just one more to go.

Nardwuar focuses his attention back to Danny.

DANNY: Where did you send them?

NARDWUAR: To another place.

DANNY: Super helpful, thanks.

NARDWUAR: Don’t mention it.

DANNY: Are they still alive?

NARDWUAR: I can’t see why not. I’m a fan! I wouldn’t hurt you guys.

Danny sighs.

DANNY: Okay. Send me away so I can do some damage control.

RICHARD: No!

NARDWUAR: Doot doola doot doo…

DANNY: (unenthused, clapping his hands on the beat) Doo doo.

Danny is gone.

RICHARD: My boss is gonna kill me.

JOSH: I’m pretty sure I’m your boss.

Richard widens his eyes and holds his hands up in a defensive position, backing slowly away from Josh.

JOSH (continued): Oh, come on. I’m not gonna hurt you, Richard.

RICHARD: You did dump an entire bag of flour over my head that one time. And kicked that giant chocolate bar in my hands. And swung a folding chair at me backstage.

JOSH: All tiny, insignificant hiccups.

NARDWUAR: Josh, you’re gonna love this next thing that I’ve got for you.

JOSH: Please, no.

Nardwuar hands Josh a Scooby Doo plushie.

NARDWUAR: Tell me what that is.

Josh studies the stuffed animal, trying to discern how it has any relevance to him.

JOSH: Scooby Doo?

NARDUWAR: What was that second word?

JOSH: Doo?

NARDWUAR: Wait. Say it again? (under his breath) Doot doola doot doo…

JOSH: Doo?

Nardwuar taps on his ear, signaling that he didn’t hear Josh. Josh huffs and rolls his eyes.

JOSH (continued, enunciating maybe a little bit too much): Doo!

Josh disappears.

NARDWUAR: Well, this has been fun. Keep on rockin’ in the free world and doot doola doot doo…

It’s silent around him since there’s no one there to finish his jingle. Nardwuar continues to grin wider and wider until he’s nearing uncomfortably close to uncanny valley.

The scene shifts to a confusing plane seemingly everywhere and nowhere at once. A pattern reminiscent of Nardwuar’s red and green plaid Tammy cap stretches from the floor to the sky. Josh and Richard appear in the mysterious space, Josh screaming with terror.

JAKE: Hey.

DANNY: Nice of you to join us.

It takes a while for Josh to collect himself but, when he does, he notices Jake and Danny standing in front of him.

JOSH: Where’s Sammy?

DANNY: He went to take a piss.

RICHARD: Hey, wait, I didn’t say the doo doo thing. Why am I here?

Josh shrugs.

JOSH: We must be a package deal or something.

RICHARD: That’s wildly unfair.

SAM: (off in the distance) Woah, I had a lot more in my bladder than I thought. I wouldn’t come over here if I were you, guys. I can cross “building a manmade lake” off my bucket list.

JAKE: God, I need to get out of here.

DANNY: And how are we gonna do that, Jake?

Jake has no clue. He’s frankly dumbfounded.

The scene jumps back to Nardwuar, still in front of the records. He seems unaware that the camera is still rolling.

NARDWUAR: (to someone offscreen) Yeah, yeah. They should be gone for good. Yup. The plaid void, where I sent Dave Rowntree. We should be good to steal their identities now. God knows we’ve done enough research.

Back in the plaid void.

DANNY: Holy shit, is that Dave Rowntree?

RICHARD: The guy from Blur?

DAVE ROWNTREE: CURSE YE FOUL BEAST, NARDWUAR!

Fin.

Note: The names/facts listed in the interview within this fic are all entirely fictitious. I'm not about to start leaking private and personal information about the guys.

#greta van fleet #gvf #gvf fic #gvf fanfic #gvf fanfiction #greta van fleet fanfiction #greta van fleet fic #greta van fleet fanfic #josh kiszka #jake kiszka #danny wagner #sam kiszka #richard #nardwuar #the human serviette

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shewasverynice · 3 months ago

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Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen

⚠️ SPOILER HEAVY ⚠️

Major Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death

Full tags/warnings on Chapter links post

Major Characters: Original Character, Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, Ieiri Shoko, Yaga Masamichi, Nanami Kento, Haibara Yu, Tsukumo Yuki, Choso

‎‧₊˚✧ Chapter 12 ✧˚₊‧

"Your Majesty," the maid said with a bow, handing over a steaming mug of coffee. The queen gave her a subtle nod of appreciation, settling back into her cushy chair and sipping from the mug.

"Shall I change the channel for you, my lady?" One of the butlers asked, "Your show is on in five minutes."

"Yes, that would be lovely thank you Geto." The queen said, gesturing lazily with her free hand.

Satoru grumbled, flipping through the magazine Shoko had given him. He gently tore at the picture of some actor she was currently obsessed with, easing it out of the collage of photos and into the small pile he was collecting. This was, of course, revenge of some kind since she never forgot anything. Probably from some prank he pulled or something. This was bullshit.

"Happy birthday," he muttered to himself, dropping the glossy image into the others.

"Speaking of my birthday," Shoko said, sitting up straighter in her decorated chair, "Is it time to pick up the food?"

Suguru looked at his watch and nodded, "Yes, actually." He looked at Sarah and smiled, "Shall we?"

Sarah nodded, setting down the tray she'd been using, "Yeah, let's go!"

"No, no no no not without me!" Satoru said, scrambling to his feet. Both Sarah and Suguru shot him a gleeful sneer as they rushed out the door and slammed it behind them.

"Bastards," he muttered, then sighed and walked over to Shoko. He cleared his throat, "Is there anything I can get for you, ma'am?"

"No, not at the moment, Gojo." She said, tipping her head back with regal arrogance, "You may return to your photo collecting."

Satoru rolled his eyes, walking back over to plop back down in his spot. He picked up his scissors then paused and asked, "What are you even going to do with these?"

"Dunno," she said, lifting her hand and waving it in the air, "I just wanna look at him."

"Really?" He asked, narrowing his eyes, "He doesn't look all that impressive to me."

"He's alright," Shoko shrugged.

"Alright?!" Satoru snapped, scooping up the little pictures and holding them over her head over the back of the chair. He let them rain down on her and grumbled, "Then why am I doing all this work, huh?! Just because it's your birthday doesn't--"

"The second and third years," Shoko said, "After I told them off for wrecking Geto and Sarah's Halloween stuff they've been after me."

"Really?" Satoru asked, surprised, "Are they--"

"They started with saying Sarah and I sleep with you and Geto and that's why you like us weaklings," She continued, "But I shut that down too. Now it's... They're calling me useless again." He walked closer, watching her crumple up the little pictures in her hand before she gritted her teeth, "I dunno. It just pisses me off."

"I never knew that kind of thing bothered you," Satoru said slowly and a bit unsurely, "You always seem so chill." Shoko had never opened up to him before. Never. In his first life they talked and bitched about work and met up here and there, but it was never that deep. "You're far from useless! That's ridiculous!" He scoffed, "I mean you can--"

"It's because I don't like men," Shoko said suddenly.

Satoru was taken aback. I mean, well sure, he always suspected since Shoko didn't really date anyone in his past life, but he never felt it mattered. A lot of Sorcerers stayed single or just did a marriage of convenience to pass on their techniques. But he was still confused about one thing...

"How does that make you useless?" Satoru asked, still genuinely surprised about that part.

"Because I have a rare technique and I don't want to be with a man to pass it on," Shoko said with a little shrug, "Guess that pisses them off."

"Who gives a shit?" Satoru said, sitting down beside her on the floor, "Why do you let that bother you?"

She shrugged again, picking at her nails. "I guess it's just frustrating when they expect so much from you," she said quietly. "I just don't want to hear it anymore."

Satoru looked at the crumbled up pictures of that actor. "So you were gonna use these to try to hide it?"

Shoko nodded.

"I see," Satoru said, picking at the papers. Then he picked up his head and grinned at her, "So you want me to go sort them out or would you rather just get nasty with a woman really publicly? Get like, really nasty? And loud?"

"Pffff," Shoko tried not to laugh, but she couldn't resist. She flicked at his forehead and he took it, leaning closer with a lopsided smirk.

"Maybe out in the courtyard, just munching away?" He continued and she laughed, shoving him away with her foot.

"Don't be gross," she managed, then sighed. She looked at him and smiled, "Thanks, though. For listening."

"I'll still deal with the others if you want," Satoru said, leaning back on his palms and letting his head tip back, "I don't like them picking on my girls."

"Your girls, huh?" She chuckled, "Didn't realize I was that special."

"Of course you are," Satoru said dismissively, "You're my friend. I only got so many."

She tilted her head, then asked, "What do you think? Honestly."

"Hmm? About you being gay?" He asked, lifting his head.

"Yeah," she said, "And the whole... Just get married and make kids stuff. Do you think it's fair?"

"Well I don't really care if you're gay," Satoru said, then paused as he considered how to answer the second question. "On one hand I get why people do it, right? A marriage of convenience with a reasonable partnership worked out wouldn't be too bad as long as no one caught feelings," he said thoughtfully, "And the ladies at the Gojo estate always said at least they could love their children. Which... I guess is something even if they had to marry some cold bastard."

"But honestly," he rubbed the back of his neck, "That just seems miserable and looks like a lot of work, too. Why bother if it won't make you happy? There's no reason to do something that serious if you don't want to."

Shoko nodded, "Yeah. I feel the same way."

"Then fuck it," Satoru said, "Just do what you want and I'll back you up."

"I don't need you to back me up," she said with a small smile, "But I'm glad you would."

"Then what do you need?" He asked, lifting up his sunglasses, "I'm here. I can definitely help."

"Just knowing you're in my corner is enough," Shoko said. Then she smirked at him, "The same goes for you, you know?"

"Hmm?" He blinked, letting his sunglasses fall down onto his nose again.

"I'm in your corner too, Gojo." She said, rolling her eyes, "I'm not the strongest or whatever, but I'm still your friend."

Satoru stared at her for a beat before he smiled, "Yeah. You are, aren't you?" He said with a soft laugh, "Guess I just thought you didn't care."

"It's easier not to," she admitted, "But I guess you three have grown on me too much."

He reached over and pulled her into a bear hug, her feet and hands trying to push him off as he nuzzled his cheek into her hair. She laughed anyway and he mockingly cooed and managed to start prying him off. Eventually he let her go and grinned.

"Well, what do you wanna watch until the others come back?" He asked, "It's gonna take them a while, probably."

"My show is on," she said, "Wanna watch it with me? I know you don't like dramas but--"

"Nah, it's cool," he said, flipping the channels, "You gotta gimme the details though. I have no idea what's going on."

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"We have returned!" Sarah triumphantly announced as she opened the door. She and Suguru marched over to the table. "Cake and your favorite dish--"

Suguru got down on the floor and placed down a stack of styrofoam takeout boxes. He lifted the lid on the top one and smirked at Shoko. The smell invaded the room, garlic and butter and shrimp.

"Yes!!" Shoko was practically salivating over the shrimp scampi. She'd demanded it a few days before her Birthday and when Satoru offered to call in and order it from a fancy restaurant she had been waiting.

She clapped her hands twice, sitting down once Satoru had rushed over a pillow for her to sit on. She smirked at him and he rolled his eyes. "I'll miss this tomorrow when my birthday is over," she said, then held out her hand and grinned when Sarah handed her a fork and Suguru served her a big plate of scampi.

The four of them decimated the scampi before Suguru placed the dessert carefully on the table. He and Sarah grinned when Shoko opened it and gasped at its contents. It was a beautiful fruit and cream tarte with cute little chocolate stars placed just right around it.

It didn't last long either.

Afterwards the four of them lounged around lazily, draped over cushions and chairs just watching Shoko's dramas and half-asleep. It was so cozy in her room by the little heater and the cold November air leaked in through the window just enough to tingle.

Satoru yawned a little then looked up at Shoko in her chair. "What kind of girls do you like, anyway?" He asked.

Suguru nearly spat out the coffee he was sipping.

"Yeah, what do you like?" Sarah asked, lifting her head off the pillow beneath her. She grinned then tapped Shoko's calf with her toes and said, "You were pretty into that upperclassmen from Kyoto, hmm?"

This time Satoru was surprised, sitting up straight with a huge open mouthed smile. It was so obvious! How had he never noticed it before?! That woman had always been so angry with him, but it made sense now!

"Utahime?!" He said, gripping her armrest, "You liked Utahime?!"

"I wouldn't call it like, I saw her once and--"

"She is pretty cute though," Sarah said slyly, "We could hit her up? Wanna go to Kyoto sometime?"

"We can get her number from someone there I bet," Satoru added, "Let's just go see her too! I bet she'd be happy to see you!"

Suguru stood up suddenly, placing his coffee cup down harder than he usually did. He didn't say anything even as the three of them stared at him. His lips parted for a moment, but instead he just walked out of Shoko's room without a word.

Sarah sucked through her teeth, grimacing as she looked away from the door again. "Oh... Right..." She mumbled.

Satoru and Shoko looked at her then each other.

"Oh." Satoru sighed as Shoko's face heated up.

"Did he... Not know you were gay?" Sarah asked quietly.

Shoko shook her head. "No. I never thought to bring it up."

"I'll go talk to him," Satoru said, pushing up on his arms.

"No," Shoko put her hand on his arm as she stood up, "I need to talk to him. This is something I should have done a while ago anyway."

Satoru and Sarah watched her leave. Satoru looked at her while she also stood and started to clean up the mess. "Guess we'll just let them sort that out," she said quietly, "Suguru is cool though. He'll understand."

"Yeah," Satoru said softly, "Yeah, he will."

That unnerving feeling settled into his heart as he got to work. A sour taste in his throat and a lump rising. Did it make him jealous? Bitter? Upset that Suguru liked someone else? That was unfair. Suguru didn't even know how he felt in the first place. Satoru didn't even know how he felt in the first place, either!

"Better for him to get rejected early," Sarah said, patting his shoulder, "It'll be easier for Suguru to move on now."

"Yeah?" Satoru asked, "You think so? Even if it hurts?"

"Well..." Sarah sighed, smiling just a little, "It's better than having to leave it unsaid and unanswered."

Shoko wandered down the hall, her steps naturally taking her to the patio. She’d seen Suguru disappear out there, and the soft evening glow seemed like the perfect moment to find him. As she stepped outside, she spotted him by the railing, hands in his sweater pockets and eyes fixed on the distant skyline. A quiet, steady presence against the fading light.

Shoko walked up beside him, and without a word, looked up, studying his profile. Suguru glanced over, surprised at first, then his face took on a shade of pink that caught her off guard. He looked back out at the horizon, his usual confidence softening as he hesitated, then finally said, “I… I’m sorry I never said anything before. About my feelings, I mean.” His voice was low, careful, as if testing his own words.

Shoko blinked, then gave him a small nod. “It’s okay,” she replied, her tone even, understanding. Taking a quiet breath, she moved closer, slipping her hand into his pocket to find his, a casual, warm gesture, but one that sent a jolt through him. He sucked in a small breath, though she felt it had little to do with her touch.

Suguru sighed softly, his shoulders relaxing just a bit, though his voice still held a vulnerability she wasn’t used to hearing. “I know… I know you don’t feel the same way. But I want to say it anyway.” He paused, gathering himself. “I like you, Shoko. You’re… you’re amazing, honestly. You’re brilliant and you work so hard, even when healing takes it all out of you.” He took a shaky breath, chuckling a little as if at his own words. “I know you don’t like me back, but… I’m glad I get to be your friend.”

Shoko felt a heaviness rise in her chest as his voice wavered, his words honest and open, something she hadn’t fully expected. She pressed her lips together, trying to blink away the sting of unshed tears, and swiped a hand quickly across her eyes before she looked back at him. “You know,” she said with a soft smirk, her voice trying to hold steady. “I think you’re a pretty good guy, even if you’re scum sometimes.”

That brought a laugh from him, genuine and light, his face relaxing as he shook his head. “Only sometimes, huh?”

They both went quiet after that, a comfortable silence falling between them as they leaned against the railing, watching the day fade. After a moment, Suguru glanced sideways, a hint of a teasing smile in his eyes. “So… did you actually like Utahime?”

Shoko chuckled, rolling her eyes. “Kind of,” she admitted with a shrug.

Suguru’s smile widened. “Good to know. Satoru and Sarah will never let that topic go now, you know.”

“Oh, I know,” Shoko sighed, a smile creeping onto her face as she imagined the relentless teasing that was sure to follow. But for now, it was just the two of them, and the fading daylight, and a quiet, simple understanding that felt… enough.

Satoru and Sarah had long since finished cleaning up the room when Shoko and Suguru returned. There was an awkward silence for a moment before Suguru sighed and said, "Well, I've been rejected." Sarah and Satoru ran up and hugged him and he nodded solemnly. "Sad, but true," he sighed dramatically.

"You alright?" Sarah asked and he patted her head.

"Yes, I'm alright," he said giving Shoko a little half-hearted smile.

"Alright, alright," she shook her head, "It's my birthday still. Let's get back to celebrating, yeah?"

"No more butler shit!" Satoru groaned, "It was funny for the first ten minutes but you got way too into it!"

"You offered!" She spat back, "It was your idea! Not my fault for enjoying it!"

Sarah let go of Suguru, giving him a little pat on the back. He smiled at her, then sighed once more. This wasn't his plan, but did he really have one? His feelings for Shoko had at least been pretty fresh and new, but the pain was still there. He sat back down in his spot by the table, watching Sarah shoving Satoru back from Shoko like a matador wrangling a bull. At least he could keep this. The bitter sting would fade soon enough, and he'd still have all of them and he always would.

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It was warm in the classroom with the heat on, the kind of warm that makes your eyelids droop even if you got enough sleep. Satoru's chin was rested on his palm, his sunglasses already resting on the desk. Suguru had both hands on the desk, his back as straight as he could manage. He was fighting desperately to keep his eyes open, but his head was just too heavy. Shoko had long since given in, resting her forehead on her arms and just outright sleeping.

The manager teaching the class sighed, looking at the three of them. She placed down her notebook and smiled, "Well, the three of you seem to understand this theory anyway. Let's take a little break, yes?"

Satoru nodded, curving has back over the wooden chair behind him to get that good stretch in his upper back. Suguru stood up as soon as his brain registered what was going on and he patted his cheeks to try to wake himself up.

"Should we wake her up?" Satoru asked, nodding his head towards Shoko.

Suguru shook his head, "No, let's just let her sleep."

The manager announced that she would be back in a moment and left the cozy classroom. Suguru walked over to the window and slid it open just enough to get some cold winter air on his face. He blinked, shivering before he closed it again.

"Ugh, I know right?" Satoru agreed, "I'm strugglin' too."

"It's the heater," Suguru nodded his head towards the offending device, "It's making me so sleepy."

"Me too." Satoru stretched his arms up, groaning into it and bending back. He glanced over at Suguru as the two of them leaned against the wall by the window. Suguru was looking at Shoko with a gentle smile before he sighed and shook his head.

"I can't believe she's gay," Suguru said quietly, "I guess I should have known. Most girls are usually so easy to read, but she never really did anything to get our attention."

"You alright?" Satoru asked.

"Yes," Suguru said with a soft smile, "I'm fine. I suppose it has been easier to accept since she wouldn't be attracted to me anyway." He rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled, "It still hurts though if I'm being honest."

Satoru, the kind of man who always did the rejecting and had never been rejected, shrugged. "Yeah, seems like it's been pretty rough."

Suguru rolled his eyes then punched Satoru's arm lightly. "Thanks for that I guess."

Satoru grinned at him, "You're welcome." The grin faded as he looked at Shoko, watching her steady breathing and the twitch of her eyes behind her lids. Was she dreaming? He wondered, what kind of dreams did she have? He'd never wondered about his friends' dreams before, especially not the first time around.

"So, now what?" Satoru asked, tilting his head in thought, "What will you do now?"

"What do you mean?" Suguru asked, looking up from Shoko.

"Well, she doesn't like you, so what now?" Satoru clarified, "Who are you gonna try next?"

Suguru chuckled, "It's not that simple."

"Why not?" Satoru asked, "You could easily find another girl. They all really like you."

Suguru smirked, "Yes, they do, but it's not something I plan on taking advantage of."

"Fair enough," Satoru shrugged.

Satoru had his fair share of flings, especially after high school. Eager women and even a few men just to experience things. Sorcerers and non sorcerers too. Neither could provide "the feeling" he had chased after. Sure he could find a few sparks of something, but after a while they bored him. They always eventually would prove that they weren't interesting and he always let them go.

"I'm really surprised," Satoru said after a time.

"Hmm? By what?" Suguru looked at him again.

"Well, I just figured you'd get rejected and be cool again," he said with a shrug.

"It's only been a few days..." Suguru said, narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah, well it's not like a break-up or something," Satoru said, "I mean, it couldn't have been all that deep."

Suguru glared at him, crossing his arms, "Really?"

"Yeah, I mean... Whatever, right? It's just one girl," Satoru said with a shrug.

Wrong answer.

Suguru sighed heavily, then shook his head. "Satoru, that doesn't make it any less painful."

"I'm just sayin' it can't be all that bad," Satoru said, cocking his head, "Don't get all worked up."

"You sound like the old men you hate so much," Suguru spat, pushing off the wall, "How I felt about her wasn't something simple and childish."

Satoru blinked. He wasn't expecting Suguru to get so upset about something so simple. Especially about something that would be so inconsequential in less than a few months. But, then again, Suguru was actually a teenager. He couldn't possibly know that this stuff wouldn't really matter someday, right?

"I probably should be more used to this," Satoru muttered as Suguru started to walk out. He reached out and called, "Suguru, wait. I'm sorry."

Suguru stopped, turning back. He was still fuming, but he waited for Satoru to speak.

"I just... I don't really get this stuff, ya know?" Satoru said, "I just don't see the point in getting all invested in someone I could lose."

"Do you really think that?" Suguru asked quietly.

"Yeah," Satoru answered simply.

"That's really sad," Suguru said softly, and continued out of the room into the hall.

Satoru sighed. That probably could have gone better, but he didn't want to lie. He really did believe that, in the long run, being too close to someone would be dangerous. Plus, losing Suguru once had been such a huge tear in his heart that he never really had the time to heal. Even in his second life, he still felt that pain. Why would he want to have that happen again?

He ran a hand through his hair and sat down at his desk again. He let his head fall back, staring up at the ceiling and letting his thoughts wander again. Should he have been more sensitive? Suguru hadn't experienced such a painful loss, so of course he would be trying to fill his heart with something so fleeting.

But then again... Suguru could do it. Suguru could find someone to be close to. Suguru had it in him to be honest and let someone in. But how could he do that himself? What if he couldn't? Who would bother when there was a good chance he couldn't give himself wholly to them?

"Why you lookin' so sad in there?"

He looked up as soon as he heard her voice and immediately cracked up.

Sarah had her face pressed against the glass window, her nose pushed up and cheeks squished. She grinned at him, her cheeks red from the cold. She crossed her eyes when he looked at her and he got up and opened the window.

"That was a good look for you," he teased, leaning on the window sill.

"Thanks," she said, wrapping her white scarf around a little tighter, "It's fuckin' cold as shit out here."

"Yeah? Wanna come in?" He asked, holding out his hand for her.

"Nah, I'm good. I got shit to do," she said, looking over her shoulder, "I just wanted to see what had you all gloomy."

"Just thinkin' about things," he said with a shrug.

"Sad things?" She asked.

"Not sad for me," he snorted, "But sad to some people. It's kind of confusing."

"Oh, well you wanna talk about it?" She asked, resting her chin on her arm and leaning on the sill beside him.

He lifted up his sunglasses and put them on his forehead. For just a moment, he gathered his thoughts before he finally asked her, "Why do you all try so hard for something that has a good chance of hurting you?"

"Hmm? Oh, so you're still thinkin' about Geto?" She asked and he nodded. "Well... I guess it's because being in love is hella addictive! And we as humans crave companions."

"But you don't need to put it all on one person," he interjected.

"Well, yeah, that's true," she agreed, "But who says it has to just be one person? Friends are companions too. Sometimes closer than your own family!"

"But that's not something people are willing to get hurt for, right?" He asked.

"Of course they do," she said a little quieter, "I was ostracized pretty badly because I'm a weird little shit. I was friends with lots of shitty people just because I didn't want to be alone."

"How is that the same though?" He huffed, "Friends are easy compared to trying to get with someone romantically."

"That's true," she agreed, "But love comes in a lot of different ways and humans are greedy little goblins that want it all."

Satoru kept his eyes forward, watching the door as he finally asked, "So if someone just decided to swear off attachments to avoid the pain of losing others, what would you say?"

Sarah didn't answer right away, but he could feel her eyes on him. He heard her shift for a moment and braced himself for whatever she might say.

"I'd say that's a really depressing outlook," she said, "Because it's ridiculous." She grumbled, crossing her arms before she tried to explain herself, "It's like... If you don't have sad shit and break ups and crushes and stuff... You don't understand what it's like when you really fall in love or how much you love your friends or how important the little things are, right?"

He grinned at her, "Oh yeah? That's an interesting take."

"It's not an interesting take, it's a fact!" She huffed, swatting at his arm, "Don't be all..." She waved her arms around aimlessly, "Depressing!"

"It's not depressing," he grumbled, "It's like finding Nirvana or whatever, right? Just no attachments."

"You already have attachments, Buddah," she teased, "You think you're above that shit, but you're not. You are just as human as the rest of us."

He grinned at her, trying to pat her head and laughing as she slapped at his hand like usual. "Are you even listening to me?!" She huffed.

"Yeah," he said, his grin fading to something more gentle, "Yeah, I heard you."

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Shoko spotted Suguru leaning against the train station wall, looking down at his phone. When he glanced up and saw her, he broke into a small, somewhat awkward smile. They were still navigating things after Suguru’s recent confession and her gentle rejection, but they were both trying. As she came up beside him, she asked, “So, have you figured out what you’re getting for Gojo’s birthday yet?”

Suguru nodded, tucking his phone back into his pocket. “Yeah, I’ve got a plan. And,” he added, pulling out a small piece of paper with a smirk, “I’ve got a note from Sarah for what she wants to get him, too.”

Shoko’s eyebrow quirked. “So... She’s ‘gone away’ again?”

He sighed, nodding, both of them exchanging a silent moment of frustration, but there was little they could do about it.

Suguru shook his head and gave her a gentle smile. “Let’s not dwell on it too much. We’re here, so let’s just enjoy it.”

Shoko chuckled, nodding as they boarded the train together. They found seats by the window, and the soft rocking of the train seemed to ease the last bits of awkwardness. Before long, they were deep in conversation about the latest issue of their favorite manga, tossing theories and laughing at the most ridiculous parts.

As the cityscape blurred by outside, Shoko casually mentioned, “Sarah still wants to do Thanksgiving.”

Suguru raised an eyebrow. “She’s still planning to cook it all by herself?”

“Yep,” Shoko replied, shaking her head. “But there’s no way I’m letting her go solo on that."

Suguru laughed, leaning back and imagining the chaos Sarah could cause in the kitchen. "She’s so clumsy, she’ll set the place on fire before she even finishes the turkey.”

Shoko grinned, picturing it. “True. But maybe between the four of us, we can pull it off. She’s excited for it, though, so I can’t really say no.”

Suguru nodded, a warm smile crossing his face. “Yeah… she’s got a way of making everything a holiday."

The train slowed as they approached their stop, and they both gathered their things. Stepping out into the busy street, Suguru tilted his head toward her. “Alright, where to first?”

“Somewhere that sells something for cocky assholes,” Shoko said dryly, her eyes sparkling with humor.

He grinned, falling into step beside her as they started down the street.

They continued down the sidewalk, the shop windows filled with tempting displays of electronics, fashion, and gadgets. Shoko occasionally pointed out a sleek watch or a pair of limited-edition sneakers, but Suguru shot down each suggestion with a shake of his head.

“Shoko,” he said, smirking a little, “this is Satoru we’re talking about. If he wanted any of this, he’d have bought it yesterday.”

She rolled her eyes but couldn’t argue with him. “Fine, you’ve got a point. So, what kind of ‘out-of-the-box’ thing do you have in mind, then?”

Suguru chuckled, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small, neatly folded note. “Actually, Sarah had some ideas. Here, take a look.”

He unfolded the paper and handed it to Shoko, who took one look and snorted, clapping her hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter. “You’re kidding,” she said, grinning wide, “Seriously?”

Suguru nodded, chuckling along with her. “Yeah, that was her top choice. She said he’d never expect it, and honestly… she’s probably right.”

“Of course he’d love it,” Shoko muttered, still shaking her head in amused disbelief.

They both stood there, sharing a knowing smile. It was exactly the kind of ridiculous, impractical, and oddly thoughtful thing that Satoru would treasure just because it came from one of them. It made perfect sense in a way only their little group would understand.

After a pause, Suguru said, “Alright, so we’ve got Sarah’s plan. What are we going to add to it?"

"C'mon, I know just the place," Shoko laughed, pointing ahead.

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#fanfiction #writing #a03 fanfic #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #geto suguru #shoko ieiri #fix it fic #reincarnation fic

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