#Fuck you Jimmy you deserve worse

[gender-ihardlyknower]

Sorry

[magicforghosts]

I usually don't post my traditional drawing but I don't have time to paint over it digitally [*]

Anyways, there's a dead pixel in the upper corner

[insomniac-dormouse]

Silly goofy game about mouthwash!

[childofgears]

Mouthwashing is so funny they hand you this regular ass guy named Jimmy and by the end of the game you want his guts strung up on a clothesline

[ang3licmizery]

I just finished watching a play through of Mouthwashing..

Jesus Christ I don’t think a game has ever made me feel so upset, disturbed, and sick to my stomach..

10/10 experience, gonna cry myself to sleep tonight👍

[hornyfor70yroldrockstars]

It’s so irritating to see people say that John Bonham’s death was meant to happen. And also when they say that bonzos death helped Jimmy with his addiction. Do you know how disgusting it is to say that? John went though so much and he needed help and support. He was also a father and a husband and his poor family and close friends lost him. I don’t know how people can call themselves a fan and then say that about John. Some people treat him so horribly. All they do is make fun of him and his alcohol addiction, but they never talk about how amazing of a musician he is, and all of the musicians from today that are inspired by him.

[explaintome]

Dear Mouthwashing fandom, explain to me, why next to the incredible fan art, I find a fuck ton of shipping content, especially between characters where this is highly problematic? SPOILERS FOR MOUTHWASHING AHEAD CN for talk about sexual abuse, death, suicide & violence

DISCLAIMER: I do not shame the general practice of shipping at all. I am a shipper myself and I think it makes up for a lot of interesting dynamics and narratives outside the canon. Shipping is an important pillar of fandom communities and I am unable to forbid you to do it. HOWEVER, in the case of Mouthwashing I want to talk about what, in my opinion, feels tone-deaf to the themes and the canon of the game. But let me start with a short summary of the game before I get into it.

Mouthwashing is basically a visual novel that takes place on the Tulpar, the last manned cargo ship of the company Pony Express. The crew, consisting of Caption Curly, Co-Captain Jimmy, Nurse Anya, Mechanic Swansea and his intern Daisuke, is confronted with a crash against an asteroid and the consequences following it. The story is told out of order to reveal the truth bit by bit. What caused the crash, what happened and how the crew deals with the time afterward being stuck on the ship. Revealing sexual abuse, tragic backstories, the horrible side effects of late state capitalism and the neglect of people in command towards the people they are responsible for.

To boil it down we have two men who, out of societal misogyny, hurt the only woman on their crew by assaulting her or not acting as they should have in their position of responsibility. All of this would not have happened if Jimmy didn't rape Anya and impregnate her, and if Curly had disciplined Jimmy in a capacity possible on the ship and in Jimmy's position as co-pilot. To be honest, with the amount of automatization the ship has, I don't think they need Jimmy if it is not a case of emergency, but I digress. Jimmy is the perpetrator of the story, but Curly is an accomplice in putting his aim of finding a solution and compromise over punishing his subordinate as he should have.

And now to my actual point: I am a big fan of the game, the narration style and the utter tragedy of 5 people losing their lives in the isolation of space, with their company not giving a shit about them. Otherwise, they might have been rescued much earlier or at all. Or had enough cryo pots in the first place. Or a nurse with experience. Or any amount of better equipment and not the most cheap shit that somehow made it through a resemblance of regulations. There are probably no regulations.

Being a fan I, of course, looked into the hashtags on several social media sites, and between the incredible art and analysis of the game, I quickly found shipping content, and I have no idea why. I have literally no idea how that narrative speaks to you in a way of shipping characters romantically/sexually. Especially three shippings really rub me the wrong way.

ANYA/JIMMY

Are you fucking kidding me? Literally, what is wrong with you shipping a victim with their abuser? There was not one interaction between them, that suggest that there was consent or affection, that Jimmy has any sympathy for Anya. He knows what is going on, he knows that Anya is pregnant and takes no responsibility. Even worse, his idea of FIXING this was to kill everyone, at least himself, to avoid responsibility! Same goes for AUs where she kept the baby and is somehow okay and happy? I get the urge to fix it, but that is not a good fix. There is no good fix if you are pregnant due to rape.

ANYA/CURLY

A lot of argument I hear for that is that "at least Curly is her friend and was nice to her" and if that is your whole foundation of argument, I want to ask what your standards for a relationship are. Please know that you deserve more than the bare minimum. Another question in that context: Is Curly really Anya's friend? His friend was abused and instead of protecting her, he tried to reason and help her abuser! That is not the behavior of a friend! There is no "but Jimmy is his friend too!". If your friend is an abuser and that does not make you stop being their friend....why?

JIMMY/CURLY

It feels like it is a law on the internet, that two men who look at least averagely handsome will be shipped, especially if they have the tiniest of connection to each other. I am not even sure if I would call them friends in the first place. It appears that Jimmy, whatever his bad life before that job was (thanks to the developers for not giving us a backstory), he is still absolutely unsatisfied with that he has. He is jealous of Curly and his position, seeing how quickly he takes on the Captain title after the crash and only realizes far too late how hard the position actually is. Curly on the other hand feels a bit like a people pleaser to me. He probably had pity for Jimmy, took him under his wing to help him? Fix him? Whatever it is, it made him ignore Jimmy's bad side to a fatal degree. I respect the toxic yaoi but are you sure?

TLDR; I am worried about how the practice of shipping developed, from a way to extend the canon, explore queerness in cis/straight dominated media, into a compulsion of where some people can't look at any form of media or constellation of characters without immediately smashing them together like dolls. If you do this, maybe step back for a minute and ask yourself if it is appropriate. On that note, same goes in case you defend Jimmy. Why?

[fogwitchoftheevermore]

ok so. forgive me for a second but i've been abnormal about skizz and ren since the hiatus between third life and last life and holy shit this season is already not helping.

let's talk about skizz, ren, undying loyalty, and golden apples, shall we?

so the thing that you need to understand about skizz is that he is loyal to a fault. impulse literally says this exact thing about him in limited life, and skizz himself says himself: "you know me and my factions, i never turn." the second thing is that the first person their loyalty manifests for in third life is ren. he and ren run into each other on the second night when ren is getting accosted by mobs outside skizz's door and skizz gives him a place to stay the night. ren decides to trade skizz for his leather, for the upcoming enchanting buisness, and gives skizz a golden apple in exchange. skizz thinks this is wildly more than he deserves but is very thankful. skizz doesn't say it here, but this is the moment he swears his loyalty to ren.

throughout third life, he is willing to do or get basically anything for ren. the two of them literally die together to the tnt trap. when ren dies on the alter and everyone thinks martyn betrayed him, skizz is the first person to get there in the morning. he's in half broken gold armor and borrowed tools from bigb and he still tells ren "get behind me", still tries to protect him from martyn. when skizz is on red, he goes a bit crazy, but he channels that bloodlust into protecting ren. he kills jimmy in the red desert, he kills cleo when she tries to attack ren, he chases down impulse when he betrays dogwarts and dies trying to kill him.

when skizz dies in third life, he's got an unused golden apple in his hotbar. after he dies, he remembers the first time he met ren, etho, and martyn, and he spends quite a bit of time on his memory of ren and ren appears in his first memory of etho. after he dies, ren wields a blade named in his honor.

skizz spends third life loyal to ren- he dies for him and he dies with him.

in last life, ren and skizz end up on completely different sides, and it very quickly gets bad because when ren becomes boogey, he kills skizz. he lures him into a trap. he tells skizz he loves him. skizz literally says "i am broken hearted" when ren kills him. ren holds no regard for the relationship they used to have and yet skizz cannot help but compliment ren's skill with the trap, outright says he can't be mad at ren.

and then it only gets worse because skizz tries to storm ren's tower with impulse after they've gone red. and that! doesn't go well! and while skizz is retreating, while he is eating the golden apple in his hot bar, ren shoots him dead.

and that is the last time they've spoken. two years ago.

because skizz isn't in doublt life. and ren isn't in limited life.

and when skizz's time comes in limited life, he ensures he doesn't have a golden apple in his inventory this time. this time, he hands the apples off to his teammates, where he knows they will go to good use. and then he hands etho a diamond fucking axe (red winter is coming) and asks him to execute him for the sake of their alliance. ok! sure! fill ren's role more explicitly, why don't you!

and that first session of secret life genuinely only made it worse. when skizz is talking to tango and cleo about their alliance, skizz says he wants to give leadership over to someone else: "i want to be more of a soldier than a leader this time." cleo says she'll fill the roll of leader- she doesn't take orders well - and then seals their alliance by giving tango and skizz a golden apple each. because of course she does.

and well, we all know that didn't really work out, so that's one person off the list that skizz can fill the dogwarts shaped hole in him with, so then he goes to bdubs. he says he'll lay his sword at bdubs' feet. he says he'll win bdubs with his loyalty. he calls bdubs "my leige", jesus christ dude, you couldn't be less subtle unless you straight up called him ren's name.

skizz has been (whether accidentally or on purpose is up to you) trying to recreate the experience he had with dogwarts, and particularly what he had with ren, since the moment dogwarts fell. he can't have it with ren because he missed his only chance in last life, so he'll fill the void with whoever he can. his fellow soldier. ren's successor. ren's new kingmaker. anyone. and it's never gonna work. i need ren to come back for like, 900 reasons, but i especially need him to come back so skizz can have a shot at making it to spring.

[tubbytarchia]

Wild Life Session 4 smallidarity thoughts (+ some Scar and Lizzie)

See it was all fine, nothing to worry about!! Joel couldn't bring himself to kill Jimmy, he barely even harmed him. I'm pretty sure he shot him just once (after Jimmy trampled their crops so. fair)? Joel calmed down, he rebuilt his car, everything is fine. He says at the start that he's wary of Jimmy because of him going after Joel last time, and that's about it for the time being

Jimmy dies and Joel makes a deal out of it and calls him a muppet. As per usual. Meanwhile Jimmy is still adamant to get at Joel whilst Scar tries to deter him because they want to be an alliance

He and Jimmy meet up at some point after their brief interaction at the start where Joel shot him, and they just banter. And Gem and Scar are just standing there like "guyss we're a family come on" meanwhile Joel and Jimmy's exchange goes as follows: Jimmy: "you're the ones with tasty lives!" Joel: "yeah bet you wish you could have a chunk of me!" "Oh I'm having a chunk out of you!" "Yeah and you know where to take that chunk out of!" "Oh I'm gonna take it! I'm taking it!" "You should!" And then Gem and Scar tell them to break it up and Joel goes "we're just flirting!!" ? what the fuck? Genuinely WHAT are they talking about. is this an innuendo of some sort. is this another ambiguous smallidarity sex scene sorry who said that

Jimmy gets a double kill (in the most adorable way btw. The way he weasels his way in there and backs off and comes back to try again all crouched. animal) and goddd people hyping him up is so so sweet. He deserves this. He's also a little bit evil, he's getting the murder rush but I'm happy for him. He needs to kill more people, he needs to get this out of his system, he deserves this, things need to get worse before they get better. ANYWAY Scar all "that was the greatest kill ever on the life series" is so cute. And man I gotta agree. There's more unique and funny and impressive kills but I would not mind calling this the best just for the fact that it's Jimmy. He's competent, he can do shit like this, but it feels like most everyone and the world is continuously against his survival, but here he is... my son...

And then Joel coming up to congratulate him... Really blummin cute. In Joel's POV also, he says "I went to congratulate Jimmy and we had a moment" which I wager he might be referring to the creeper incident as 'the moment' but that'd make no sense to call it that. With that tonation. Why did he say it like that. Stop being cute

But yeah Scar tries to blow Joel up with creepers only for Joel to save him from his own creeper and he's so casual about it. He is incredibly kind to the bamboozlers, it's really cute...

And then Jimmy does it!! He gets Joel!! And he gets him real good!! And can you believe that the first person to kill either of the family duo is Jimmy, of all people. Scott has died by this point too and Jimmy is the one to make a dent in the full 6-life alliance. Crazy. I'm so proud of him. It was seriously really good too, see, when Jimmy puts his mind to something and is able to focus he excels, he really does. And Joel, oh Joel is such a good sport about it. He keeps saying how it was good and fair and that he still wants an allyship with him. Tells him "welcome back to green" aww. And they make a truce, Jimmy got it out of his system and now they can be friends and go kill other people instead and Joel is proud of him... Jimmy "Joel, I finally got you, so I will stop now, so let's do the perfect dap" and then they both count down and clap their hands to simulate slapping palms. Awesome. All of Joel and Jimmy is just really cute this time around. Very happy about them being a more proper alliance now, but we'll see if it sticks... Joel can only be so mean to Jimmy at this point though I don't think he has it in him to betray him or anything lol. Can't speak for the rest of them but not too worried for the smallidarity, it's a plentiful crop...

Also a very important exchange between Lizzie and Jimmy at some point: "I just finangled a load of diamonds off of Joel" "Oh? How did you do that?" "I asked him just really nicely" (lie btw she was moreso extorting Joel) "Oh, that doesn't work when I... I guess... you are his wife, I guess..." "Yeah..." "Lucky for some I guess- right (unrelated topic)" I'm not 100% confident that's what Jimmy said at the end, it's a bit hard to make out but. what? Hello?

I also extend gratitude towards Lizzie for being so nice and supportive of Jimmy, she was the one to suggest the cobweb creeper trap that ended up taking Joel out, but she also insisted that he drink a health restoration stew beforehand in case anything went wrong. Jimmy didn't end up doing so (he was full) and Lizzie is all "why?" and "something could have gone wrong". man. Nice to him...

[thebearer]

honestly, thinking about the last episode and thinking about pete, and i am an honest to god pete defender.

like he is so good to sugar, and tries to hard to be good for her, good for the whole family. he knows how fucked up they all are, and he's just there- a little sunshiney boy trying to keep everything together. he has the best of intentions, he really does.

the scene with donna outside the restaurant. how he's just trying to do what's best and he feels empathy for her? he sees the best in people and honestly, i get why they're hard on him- he's not their usual type in the family, but pete deserves all the love and support genuinely.

just picturing your first true berzatto family get together. donna wants to see the new baby, so they have it at the restaurant. steven and michelle from out of town, jimmy, leo, donna, everyone- the whole gang. you're overwhelmed, especially when donna starts drinking.

pete just kinda comes and sits by you, while you're alone and unsure in the corner. you'd already been hounded with a million questions, carmen is trying to keep the peace in the kitchen, trying to check on you, trying to keep everyone from killing each other.

"how are you doing?" pete asks, sitting beside you, baby mikey in his arms.

"i-i'm good." you muttered, eyes darting around the room.

"it's a lot." pete sighed.

"it is a lot." you muttered, nodding slowly. "i mean, i knew it was gonna be a lot. carmy warned me on that but it's like..."

"so much worse than you thought it would be?" pete looked at you carefully.

"yeah." you nodded. "i, uh, i understand a lot more now."

"they're, uh, they're actually really nice. all of them, on their own." pete offered. "like steve and michelle, they're great, really. easy to talk to, always really nice, super fuckin' funny. and...and you know jimmy. leo is... leo's kinda a ball buster. got this dry sense of humor, but he'll be nice to you, a little invasive you know? but he's got good intentions."

you nodded slowly, eyes scanning around the room towards each person. "what about his mom?" you muttered, looking at the white haired woman nursing another glass of chardonnay. "she, uh, she hasn't spoke to me the whole time. i tried to introduce myself and she walked right past me." you tried not to sound hurt, carmen told you to shake it off, but it did hurt. that was his mother, no matter how he tried to play it off.

"donna is... donna is a lot." pete hummed. "she... you can't force donna. ok? she'll come to you when she's ready. right now, she doesn't know who you are. and as fucked up as it is, it's her way of looking out for carm, looking out for herself. just give that one time. she's watching you."

you scoffed lightly. "yeah? that supposed to make me feel better pete?"

"no. no not at all." pete laughed. "but, just some advice. you gonna leave carmen anytime soon?"

"no." you furrowed your brows, shooting a glare at him.

"then you show her that. she'll ease into you. i promise." pete said.

"thank you, pete." you nodded sincerely at him. "thanks for this."

"of course." pete grinned. "it's a lot and they're all too caught up in their own to try and help so... we outsiders gotta look out for each other."

you laughed lightly, looking down at the baby in his arms. he had the berzatto nose, carmen's and mikey's. "you're not an outsider anymore." you grinned. "not with this little guy."

pete smiled proudly. "i'm still an outsider. just got like a lifetime pass in." you laughed, reaching out to stroke the baby's soft tuft of hair. "you wanna hold him?"

"are you sure?" your eyes flashed to him. "i'm not great at it."

pete shrugged, fishing his hand sanitizer out and tossing it to you. "just don't drop him. i won't abandon you with him. promise."

you freshly sanitized hands shook lightly, grabbing the baby a little unsure, shifting the weight in your arm until it was comfortable. baby mikey gurgled, face scrunching for a moment, before he settles, lulled back into whatever rest he was in before.

"ah, he likes you." pete boasted. "must know you're gonna be a vip like me."

you snorted lightly, swaying back and forth with the tiny baby. "yeah. hopefully."

"you will be." pete nodded, his eyes cutting over to the figure by the windows. "judging by carmy's face, you definitely will be."

you looked up, seeing your boyfriend standing there, a water in his white knuckled grip staring at you. you smiled gently, nodding him over.

"they got you on baby sitting duty?" carmen grinned, trying to play off how flustered he was before, how his heart was skipping a beat seeing you like that.

"somethin' like that." you hummed. "pete just asked if i wanted to hold him. he's cute. kinda looks like you."

carmen scoffed as pete boasted. "he does, doesn't he! i told nat that and she told me i was crazy! see, nat!" he stood, going to get his wife from across the room, a promise he'd be right back.

carmen slid into his spot, leaning over your shoulder to look at the baby- his nephew. "he's cute." he nodded. "sorry you got stuck with pete." his tone snarled, rolling his eyes gently.

"hey, stop that." you frowned. "pete is very sweet, alright? he's a good guy, carm."

carmen could feel his shoulders tense. he was a good fuckin' guy, he knew that, that's why they gave him such a hard time. "you're right." carmen muttered. "he is a good guy."

"what were you two talking about?" carmen asked, letting the baby wrap his tiny fist around his finger.

"he was just telling me about your family."

"oh." carmen rolled his eyes sarcastically. "i'm sure that was great."

"it was." you said firmly, looking at him. "all the good stuff, baby. promise."

carmen blushed, resisting the urge to kiss you while his sister and pete came back over, pete exaggeratedly talking about how the baby did look like carmy and mikey and you agreed, which then brought jimmy over to give his opinion, stevie and michelle following, until everyone was around you bickering and throwing back and forth about who was right.

[ultimate-marysue]

Something very interesting about Jimmy that I don't see a lot of people mention is how he has actual real problems. He is genuinely being victimized by the capitalist system and the shitty corporation he works for.

I think this is very important. The game doesn't try to sympathize with him at all, he couldn't be less sympathetic unless he kicked a puppy. Then why include it? They could have made him just another entitled asshole with no real problems thinking himself the true victim of life. But they don't.

In fact, in his monologue during the birthday scene he's not only lamenting his luck, he points out how their collective firing will affect Swansea and Anya. He actually speaks more about them than about himself.

I don't think this is a "Jimmy is not that bad actually" moment. I think it's a "Jimmy is human and has actual tangible problems that fuck his life up". This is important because it's so easy to demonize awful people like Jimmy to the point where they stop being human in our eyes. But they are, they are human and they sometimes weirdly care for the people they hurt.

Demonizing bad people is what leads to people like Curly trying to give "one more chance" to their buddies. To not kick them while their down because "They're going through a lot". The point of Jimmy is that you can be having an awful time in life and you can still be an awful person. You can be a victim of your circumstances and also victimize others.

It's so easy to spot assholes when they're rich people with no real excuse or explanation to why they behave like shit. But your friend who is down on his luck, and you know he's not a bad guy you know? He just maybe misunderstood or maybe he's just lashing out...yeah, that friend is an asshole too.

He may deserve a second chance, he may be going through a lot, but that doesn't excuse you for being the worst person ever. It's easy to demonize Jimmy because he is a bad person, he's problems aren't nearly as bad as Anya's or Swansea's, he hurts others and takes no responsibility for it. Even in the end he doesn't acknowledge how he hurt Anya. But let's not forget that his evil is a very human one.

The real lesson isn't "Jimmy bad", the real lesson is being the victim of a really shitty situation doesn't make you a poor martyr angel. You can fuck Up, and usually stressful situation make us fuck Up more. So when you're down is not the time to force everyone to tolerate your bullshit cause you're having a bad time. Other people are also having a bad time, some may be having a worse time than you. You're not entitled to cause harm to others just cause your going through a rough patch.

In life, people aren't assholes just because, they have reasons they tell themselves for acting the way they do. Don't be that person. Be understanding of people's issues, but don't tolerate bad behavior out of empathy or pity. The worst person you know is a pitiable guy that will weaponize his very valid issues to justify foul shit.

[foodtruckery]

Okay wait, tell me if this is too much, But!

Man ABO verse where Stan does present as an omega before he’s kicked out. Like he goes into his first heat while his parents are out of town for a week (his mind and body feeling safe and relaxed for once???) and the only alpha around to help is Ford. So being the brother he is, and since this is before the science fair incident, he helps Stan through his heat. Things still run its course and Stan still gets kicked out, but this? It’s even angstier because Stan and Ford have sort of acknowledged their feelings for each other, been closer than ever, and now Ford is hurt, betrayed, and turning away from Stan. And Stan has been hurt, betrayed, and abandoned by the only good Alpha he knows (both their parents are Betas bc Fuck Filbrick he doesn’t deserve to be an alpha). And to tie it off?

Stan’s pregnant (I know mpreg can squick people out, sorry). He’s pregnant, and Ford doesn’t know, won’t elbow until a decade later when he asks for Stan’s help and Stan brings along these almost 10 year twins with 6 fingers

definitely not too much, anon! i actually think i've read at least one fic that was similar to this, at least with the first half - stan and ford both presenting at home, stan going into heat, ford helping - which was a delight!

i'll be honest, the pregnancy bit doesn't typically do it for me (not a squick exactly, just not really my thing!). BUT. i will say that i do really love thinking about how things may have changed on stan's end if he had gotten kicked out and realized he was pregant. i think in that situation, it would be a BIG deal if he decided to even see that shit through (and idk maybe he seriously considers not, but finding out it's twins??? that's harder and worse in most ways but it also makes it harder to terminate).

but if stan did end up pregnant and he did keep them? i think it's WAY more likely that stan would have established more stability in his life a lot faster. by himself, he's wrapped up in a lot of the anger, the get-rich-quick mentality, the 'i don't need anyone' and the self loathing that leads to self sabotage and putting himself in dicey situations.

but with kids to look out for??? fuck that. sure there's still a lot of "fuck i can't do this, they'd be better off with someone else," and he's definitely still hurt and angry, angrier in some ways even. but i think he'd be more willing to accept help when it's offered (i could see him running a "poor pregnant omega" racket, which isn't really a racket but that's how he'd see it, for sympathy and cash, but accidentally attracting some sincerely concerned good samaritans). it'd be easier to settle for "good enough," cause if he can't prove his family wrong by getting rich, at least he can prove that he's a better fucking parent.

and honestly i say all that specifically to set up (and i'm sorry cause i think this might be a sharp left from where you were going with this anon) that i think it would be SO much more interesting if, when stan gets the ask from ford, he's already settled in with someone else (my jimmy snakes affection rears its head again here) and actually doing...pretty well, all things considered. it puts him and ford in two VERY different places - life-wise and their perspectives of the relationship they'd had - and further complicates an already sticky stituation.

[nutklcker]

For your Swansea eye post, consider It relates to them both knowing what he's done? Also think about this, they probably didn't mean for this but like, think about it 'See right through you' Curly lost his right eye, he really cared about Jimmy, they were friends Swansea fucking hated him - he saw right through him, took some time to get there

death makes that no longer possible

YO WAIT YOURE ACTUALLY SO RIGHT: Context.

So like in Anya's case, she sees how absolutely fuckoff terrible Jimmy is but due to the manner in which she was abused (ie the way she's seemingly been forced into writing it off as "not that bad" or "deserving" [saw a post on this concept specifically a while ago but don't remember if I reblogged it, gonna go look for it now: edit I COULDNT FIND IT :(]) she excuses it. She excuses the absolute hell she went through due to the way Jimmy manipulated her.

And in Daisuke's case there's a handful of reasons why he could be either intentionally ignoring or unintentionally unable to realize Jimmy's worse-than-hellish behavior ranging from his age to his upbeat demeanor to a sense of camaraderie (in regards to that scene where Daisuke breaks down after drinking too much and reveals he's also pretty pessimistic about the situation but trying to put on a brave face. He might feel like he's putting on a brave face for Jimmy too because he sees that same pessimism in him), but whatever it is that led Daisuke to not really realize Jimmy's assholery, we can see by the time he gets into the vent he STILL thinks Jimmy's doing the right things. Like he agrees to follow his plan of getting in the vent of course, he also doesn't really bat an eye when Jimmy only mentions saving Curly and not Anya (which Jimmy probably does cuz Anya saying something along the lines of "I'm finally doing what you told me to" implies Jimmy told her to off herself after he learned of the pregnancy. So he knows what she means when she says that and probably knew in advance that she had killed herself and was now focusing on making sure she hadn't killed Curly too) and, even in death, Jimmy isn't the one that killed him.

Fun fact I just realized about that: the way he was killed specifically avoids both his eyes while crossing between them. I'd like to posit that this could mean that, in game, eyes symbolize the ability to properly see reality and the trap of being overcome with delusion or wishful thinking. The way Daisuke died separated those two, implying he was never able to choose one or the other and instead saw both, fully. He never got an answer. He never realized that Jimmy was an asshole, he never got definitive proof that Curly didn't crash the ship, he never got to "grow up" and face reality as an adult with a job. I also find it interesting that when Daisuke dies Jimmy is sitting on his side that the "sees reality" while Swansea is sitting on the "blinded by delusion side" which could imply that he FINALLY sees that Jimmy is the problem but is simultaneously still blinded by devotion to Swanson, unable to recognize the damage his alcoholism has had on him (Daisuke).

With all this in mind I LOVE the idea that Swansea and Curly both losing their right eyes symbolizes they've lost the ability to be deluded by wishful thinking, they both, finally, COMPLETELY see Jimmy for who he is. They are forced to only see reality. Anya is forced into a balancing act between the two, as is Daisuke until his death, at which point his ability to choose between reality and wishful thinking is split in half, forcing him to see the reality of Jimmy's existence and the wishful thinking of Swansea's predicament (meaning he might view Swansea's murder of him as a mercy killing).

[strniohoeee]

Abscond Pt. 2

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N returns back home after living in Arizona for five years. When she’s reunited with the triplets will her feelings still be there for Matt, or will she move on? Does Matt have a girlfriend or does he still like Y/N??🫂

Warnings⚠️: None!! Hope you enjoyed this one! And read Part 1 if you haven’t already🖤

Song for the imagine: For the First Time- Mac DeMarco

It’s just like seeing her for the first

Time again

“When the fuck did you get back?” Matt said walking over to me and pulling me into a big hug

“A few hours ago” I said hugging him harder

“This is a fucking dream” Nick said still shocked

Matt pulled away and Nick gave me the biggest huge

“We missed you so fucking much” Chris said giving me a hug after Nick

“I missed yall so fucking much too, like I’m so glad I’m back home” I said pulling away from the hug

“Are you here for good?” Nick asked

“Yeah! I’m back for good. I left my dad….I had to that place was a hellhole” I said shaking my head

“I bet. When the first holidays rolled around and you didn’t show we were like okay maybe she’s doing it with her dad, but once it was the second holiday and then the third and the fourth. That’s when we knew” Nick said

“That guy kept me locked away from everything and everyone” I said letting out a breath of air

“I just can’t get over the fact that you’re back” Matt said looking at me

“I can’t either….man five years just like that” I said snapping my finger

“Five years is insane” Chris said

“You know actually I found the uh the Polaroids from the night I last saw you guys” I said looking at them

“The Polaroids of us?” Matt asked

“Yup, they fell out of my bag, and somehow landed under my bed….all these years I swore my dad found them and tore them up, but no” I said laughing a little bit

“Insane” he said laughing and looking down

“We’ll leave you guys to catch up” their mom said, and her and Jimmy walked out the kitchen

“Congrats on the fame. It’s crazy never would I have thought yall would be social media influencers” I said smiling

“Thank you. It’s something we picked up junior year right after you left” Chris said

“And honestly we never expected to get as popular as we did” Nick said

“Yall deserve it! You guys are so genuine and amazing” I said smiling

“Thank you” Matt said smiling at me

“Well tell us about Arizona” Chris said sitting across from me

“There’s nothing to tell really, I finished school there and I went to college for three years, but uh I just dropped out. It wasn’t something I wanted to do. I felt like I was living my life for my dad, and not me” I said

“Make any friends?” Chris asked me

“Honestly no….people were kind of turned off by me…I talked to some people here and there, but friends” I said shrugging my shoulders

“Bullshit! You were too cool for them anyways” Nick said rolling his eyes

“I was just so glad to get out of there and get away from my dad and his weird bitchy girlfriend” I said

“Didn’t like step mommy?” Nick asked laughing

“Ew you weirdo! No I didn’t” I said laughing

“So tell us more” Matt said looking at me

“That’s literally it” I said

“What??? No parties, no boyfriends, no nothing?” Chris asked

“Mm there was this one boy” I said rolling my eyes

Matt's body language shifted at that

“Do tell” Nick said

“Well he was coworker at one of my jobs, that was my first mistake” I said laughing

“Boyfriend or just like a boy toy?” Chris asked wiggling his eyebrows

“I don’t even know to be honest. Like one minute he wanted to be with me and then the next he didn’t? I wasted a whole year on his ass” I said rolling my eyes

“A year?” Matt said raising his eyebrow

“Yeah….from 19 to 20. Worse time honestly. He was talking to other girls. He like deleted everything off his phone, but one day left his Apple Watch home, and I looked at it, and there was a fucking Tinder code that was sent from the night before” I said laughing

“Oh god” Nick said

“Honestly good riddance I was never more happy to leave someone” I said

“Enough about me what about you guys” I said

“Well honestly we’ve just been focusing on our YouTube career, and we live part time here and part time in LA” Matt said

“Ouu nice sounds like fun” I said

“Oh it is. It’s amazing the amount of people who support us. It’s a blessing really” Matt said

“What about the dating scene for you guys?” I asked

“Mmm just a bunch of dead end talking stages” Nick said

“Oh what? That sucks yall are amazing, anybody is lucky to have you guys” I said

“Most people just want to use us” Chris said shrugging his shoulders

“Ew shallow” I said making a face

“Very” Matt responded

“Um I wasn’t sure if you guys wanted to hang over at my house” I said offering

“That would be so much fun, we haven’t been there in five years” Chris said

“Come on then” I said hopping off the chair

We left and walked over to my house. My mom was sleeping on the couch with one of her reality tv shows playing

“We can go to my room, but beware it’s still the same from when I was 16. I’m just starting to fix it” I said looking at them

“Oh that’s like a time capsule” Nick said

“It sure is” I said laughing and walking up the stairs

We got into my room, Nick and Chris immediately sitting on my bed. Matt was kind of looking around

“So many memories in here” he said out loud

“Woahhhh” Chris said laughing

“Not like that you weirdo fuck” Matt said laughing

My mom must’ve placed my Polaroids back on my vanity because Matt picked them up

“Oh god I look horrible” he said laughing

“No you don’t! We were 16 what did you expect” I said laughing

“You look the same” he said

“Oh god….I was ugly at 16” I said looking at matt

“Well no obviously you got older, but I don’t know your smiles still the same, and you still have that shine in your eyes” he said smiling and putting the Polaroids down

“I’m shocked after being with my dad for so long” I said laughing

Matt sat down on my bed along with his brothers as I decided to try and clear out some more things

“I hope you don’t mind I’m clearing some stuff out” I said looking at them

“No do your thing” Matt said

I was bent over picking something up when my shirt lifted a little bit

“IS THAT A FUCKING TATTOO” Nick yelled

Flashback

“I don’t like tattoos….I don’t know I feel like why cover your body you know” I said sitting with the three boys

“I think they’re cool, you can express yourself that way” Nick said

“You can express yourself other ways too instead of covering your skin” I said

“I’m sure I’ll be tatted up by the time I’m 20” Matt said

“You better not” I said looking at him

“You’ll never get a tattoo?” Chris asked me

“No never… I don’t like them” I said shaking my head

“Yeah right! I bet when you’re 20 you’ll be covered in tattoos” Chris said scoffing

“Will not!” I said smacking him

“Y/N I KNOW YOU! I promise you, you will” he said rolling his eyes at me

Flashback Over

“Uhhh” I said turning around and looking at them

“The queen of don’t cover your body! I fucking called it” Chris said in a mocking voice

“Oh shut up people change” I said rolling my eyes

“Never expected you to get one” Matt said looking at me

“Mmmm hate to break it to you, but I’m covered in tattoos” I said laughing

“Shut up!” Nick said

I took off my long sleeve sweater to expose my arms, uppper back and collarbone areas peppered with patchwork pieces

“Yoooo whatttt” Chris said getting up to look at my tattoos

“I know…I was such a hypocrite” I said laughing

“Those are nice as fuck” Matt said looking at my arms

“Thanks! That’s actually something that helped me a lot in Arizona. Being able to express myself through art on my skin” I said

“I told you” Nick said

“I knowwww” I said rolling my eyes

They were at my house for a while before Chris and Nick decided to head home, but Matt and I were so deep in convo he decided to stay

“I feel like we never separated. Like it’s crazy how we can just pick back up where we left off” I said to Matt

“I know right. Such a comforting feeling” he said

“It is, I never had anything like you guys in Arizona” I said

“Yeah when you left…it just wasn’t the same at all” he said back

“Yeah those first 6 months were so hard for me” I said shaking my head

“Yeah me too. I just couldn’t stop thinking about you” he said staring at me

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I mean I never really stopped thinking about you” I responded

“I didn’t either. Most nights I would lay awake wondering how you were doing, what you were doing, who your friends were….if you had a new boyfriend” He said laughing lightly

“I wondered too….about if you had a new girlfriend” I said looking at him

“I tried, but nobody was ever you” he said lowly

“I think that was my issue too, I looked for you in every guy” I said giving him a half smile

“As did I with every girl” he said

“Did umm…did those feelings ever go away?” I asked looking at him

“Umm eventually they did after a good year and a half, but you were always at the back of my mind” he said

“You were always at the back of my mind too” I said

“Seeing you today…it uh it brought back all those memories” he said fidgeting with his hands

“Good ones I hope” I said smiling

“Always good ones” he said looking at me again

“It was like seeing you for the first time again” he said swallowing deeply

“Did you feel anything?” I asked him

“I felt whole again, I felt butterflies like I always would when I saw you” he said looking down

“Matt you haven’t changed one bit, such a sweet lover boy” I said smiling at him

“Did umm did you feel anything?” He asked me

“I did…..I felt 16 again…..it took me back to that night we laid in the field and you told me you loved me, and how complete I felt” I said smiling at him

“That was my favorite night” he said smiling back at me

“I missed you” I said to him

“I missed you too” he said back

We looked at each other while we let the silence engulf us. Matt was so beautiful, he had an amazing soul and a kind personality. To say I was still in love with Matt would be an understatement. I have never wanted to freeze a moment more than now…

Matt and I both started to lean in mindlessly…letting the moment get to us. Staring into each other's eyes, our hands getting sweaty, our hearts beating out of our chest. All like we were 16 again…..but we weren’t. So I pulled away

“I uhhh wow I didn’t realize how late it is” I said looking at the clock on my nightstand

“Oh yeah! And you’re probably tired from traveling. I’ll head out and uhh maybe we can hangout tomorrow?” He asked awkwardly getting off the bed

“Uhh yeah that would be great” I said also getting off the bed

“Well um goodnight” he said nodding his head

“Good night” I said smiling at him

He looked at me for a moment in silence

“Oh uh I’ll walk you out” I said

“Ummm yeah sure” he said

God why was this so awkward? He almost kissed me, and I backed away, and was making it horribly awkward for him. Did I want to kiss him? I mean I did…but I couldn’t right? Or could I?

As I was fighting in my own head Matt and I walked down the stairs and to my front door.

I can’t just let him walk out right? Why did I pull away? This was all I ever wanted? For five years I wanted nothing more than to lay in his arms and kiss him. Matt was my everything….what am I doing?

Matt opened my front door, and began to walk out

“Uhh Matt?” I asked shyly, mentally smacking myself

He turned around quickly his eyes lighting up

“Yeah Y/N?” He said smiling

“Uhh it was great to see you” I said awkwardly

“It was great to see you too” he said laughing

“Well uhh goodnight” I said

“Goodnight” he said waving at me

He turned back around and got down to my first step. MAKE A MOVE my head screamed at me

“Wait uhh Matt” I said again reaching out for him

“Yeah?” He said turning around again smiling

“I ummm I love your new look” I said, y/n WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS

The love of my life is standing in front of me, and I’m acting like a shy school girl. I didn’t even act like this at 16. What is wrong with me

“Thank you, I like your new look too” he said giving me a funny look and smiling, and heading to turn back and walk down the steps

Y/N MAKE A FUCKING MOVE NOW, my brain screamed at me

“Matt” I said again

“Yes Y/N” he said turning to me slightly annoyed

I looked at him for a split moment reading his eyes, my heart pounding out of my chest, kiss him or tell him another stupid thing and have him walk away. Uhh fuck it

I walked out my front door, and pulled him in by his jacket smashing our lips together. In a beautiful long awaited kiss….a kiss that could solve every problem in my life. A kiss that could make time stop and heal all the world's problems. This was a kiss I’ve been needing for the last five years.

I pulled away both of us out of breath and looking into each others eyes

“I uh…sorry I don’t know what took over me” I said in a whisper backing away slightly

“Don’t apologize” he said looking into my eyes before reconnecting our lips again, his hands on my cheeks kissing me so lovingly. This was a hallmark movie type of kiss

Pulling away we looked into each others eyes again smiling now

“Fuck I’ve missed you” I said taking a deep breath

“I’ve missed you too” he said looking into my eyes

We pulled away from each other before he waved and started to walk towards his house

“Have a good night” I said to him

“You too” he responded

“Hey Matt!” I yelled

“Yeah?” He said looking at me

“Pick up your pants” I said giggling

He looked at me and laughing shaking his head

“Matt” I yelled out again

“Yes Y/N” he said in a sing song way

“I hate that jacket on you by the way” I said

He laughed “yeah I love you too have a good night” he said before getting across the street to his house

I smiled at him and waved good night before walking into my house and shutting the door. Smiling to myself and laughing

I felt 16 again….

The End

Hiii okay guys I hope you liked this one🥹🥹 I think I have some more ideas, but I’m not too sure😭😭. I’ll cook something up don’t worry 🖤🖤

-J���🏽

[missingininaction]

alright, friends, i might say something you don't like but i think it's important. not just to defend a character, but because i think this is literally making people's experience and relationship with this game worse.

give jimmy like two seconds to exist.

by hating jimmy so much you refuse to even say his name, and judge real, living people for liking him, you are cheapening your experience by boiling down the main character to the most ~yuckiest~ moments. and, by not making a seperate space for hating on him, you are drowning out the voices of people who actually have nuanced things to say about his character. you know, the skilled writers and artists that feed the fandom? limitation is what kills fandoms, you have to know that.

is jimmy a good person? no. is he a good captain/companion/worker? Absolutely Not! he crumbles like dust under any pressure and he immediately shifts blame off of himself, he is an actively harmful individual and it's right to be upset by his actions. i literally had to stop myself from saying "man FUCK jimmy." multiple times because i didn't want to spoil how terrible he got to my friends when i showed the game to them.

but you have to understand; people are more than their actions. thats part of the entire point of the game. thats why its so abstract. you are meant to think about the nuances of their situation.

we can agree that anya was way more as a woman than what happened to her and what she did as a result of it, right? that despite her best efforts, she was a victim of circumstance, and she deserves to be understood and analyzed fully?

then why, seeing a fictional man who has done immoral things, are you so disgusted you won't even draw, write or discuss him outside of hate? what is that doing for you, to ignore literally the main character of the game because of his actions?

now, this is not to say people can't hate jimmy. i understand it! as someone who has been a victim of s/a and abuse, i understand if you hate him and are even triggered by him to the point of avoiding mention of him. (but...why are you in this fandom? ((not aggressive im genuinely asking)))

you can feel however you want about any character, my goal is not to control people. but i thought it was common knowledge to not hatepost about someone in their tag? over actual insight into his character and, you know, the main themes of the game?

jimmy is a man who has struggled his whole life. both him and curly confirm that in the game. he's unable to control his emotional outbursts, and he likely had no idea what to expect from being in fucking SPACE for over a year with people he probably didn't even know before that trip. and pony express and their corporate safety corner cutting certainly didnt help, did it?

for one reason or another, he most likely was never actually taught how to manage his emotions. that's just how it is sometimes, growing up as a man. and it would make sense if he was forced to deal with everything himself, no? he always complains, but he still says he'll handle it. because that's what he's always had to do. and this is just the start of what i could say about what made him the way that he is.

he's a victim too, not only of his own actions.

surprise surprise, people who do awful things can also be victims.

honestly, this entire situation baffles me. how are you going to avoid one of the main characters of the game, let alone the one you play as ninety percent of the time? mind you, curly is also guilty, and i am happy to see at least some people giving him space for nuance. because he is also a victim!!! why is it so impossible to see jimmy as nuanced, when literally every other character also has incredible depth to them??

you're tarnishing and spitting on the beautiful writing of this game just because one character is too icky for you to feel comfortable thinking about for too long. it's horror, you absolute morons. it's supposed to make you uncomfortable.

if you hate jimmy, i dont blame you. but please, please, make your own space for it. be kind to people who want to explore jimmy and the darker themes, and like him for what his character represents. this is a video game fandom, not a witch hunt. and please, learn some fandom etiquette while you're at it, okay? okay. thank you

also just say his name. its not a slur youre not gonna go to hell if you say jimmy. like this isn't as important but still it just feels like a microcosm of this whole thing.

[yourlowkeyidiot3]

YOU ARE SO RIGHT ABOUT THAT CURLY POST

Hey guys genuine question. If the game WAS about punishment, why would JIMMY be the one "punishing" him??? He's the one who well, IS RESPONSIBLE HE'S LIKE THAT IN THE FRIST PLACE?? He's the one who's constantly abusing and torturing him?? How can it be punishment when the one who's for his "punishment" is also the one who's %100 more worse and responsible for everything than him. Shouldn't he be punished by, let's say, someone who deserves to punish him? Like Anya for an example??? Make it make sense!!!

You are correct anon and you should say it

Btw I hate how those people also kinda try to act as if they are morally superior for saying he deserves it?? Like bro if you saw the scenes where Jimmy literally beats him up for not wanting to take his meds or/and for crying to the point where the next time Jimmy comes to give him his pills he tries to stay quiet cuz he's scared that if he makes noise he'll get beaten up again. And the scene that's literally a "puzzle" of Jimmy FORCING HIM TO EAT HIS OWN LEG, THAT HE BRUTALLY CUT OFF, and if you mess up he fucking VOMITS it but Jimmy doesn't stop until you get it right. And thought "yea he deserves that" I'm side eyeing you