#Fire was actually started by a smart chair

[amuseintime]

Loop’s Adventure!

My girlfriend @dragonfuckerllc got me a Loop plushy for birthmas! (My birthday and Christmas are within a week of each other and I went to visit her around New Years, lol)

First day there, they watched me eat some takeout Sushi~ And helped me immediately make my gf regret getting them /silly

I continued to taunt them with food and water while they made fun of me for needing to eat at all. I expect nothing less from this bastard (affectionate)

I wish I’d taken more pictures, but I then proceeded to use them as an elf on the shelf Loop proceeded to hide around the house to spy on my gf. Naughty thing!

So naughty, in fact, they started a house fire… (note, this link is considerably more serious, heads up!)

Smug bastard (affectionate) survived!!! But still needs a bath…

So until then, they are being suffocated for their crimes and for being stinky.

Help me get them to a dry cleaner?

Bonus: Their friend! Who got out cleanER, but also has some soot in their bum.

[solxamber]

Trash Novel Chronicles: I Want to Retire - Idia Shroud x reader

You write a novel that reads like a dumpster fire and while trying to delete the draft, you accidentally get isekai’d into it. Now, as the villainess you have to get Idia Shroud on your side as well as survive high society. You have your work cut out for you.

Series Masterlist

You’ve lived a life. A noble life, full of honor, glory, and caffeine-fueled late-night writing sessions.

You're an aspiring author.

An aspiring author who, unfortunately, just created the most stupid novel plot of all time.

At least, that’s how it feels. You sit back, staring at your screen, utterly defeated as your latest creation flickers mockingly before you.

You’ve named it: "The Battle for Genius Prince Idia’s Hand" (working title, don’t judge). And wow, it’s a mess.

Here’s the breakdown of your disaster:

You’ve got your heroine—a girl so sweet she’s practically made of sugar, like one of those cookies that look good but crumble the second you bite into them. Naturally, she’s fighting for the affection of your male lead, Prince Idia, who is a socially awkward, genius mechanic prince (because you thought it’d be fun to make him hot and bad with people).

Then there’s the villainess. Ah, the villainess. She’s smart, sharp-tongued, and has enough sass to level a small city. Her entire personality? Sabotage. And she’s also after Idia—because apparently, that’s the only thing women in this story care about. (You regret this immensely.)

But oh no! Plot twist! Idia gets kidnapped by some unnamed evil force (you’ll figure it out later). The heroine? Well, instead of rescuing him, she falls for some Bland Prince. You don’t even know why. You think his name might be Greg. Or Gerald. Honestly, he’s that unremarkable.

Meanwhile, the villainess doesn’t even care anymore about Idia. Instead, she’s full-on dedicated to ruining the heroine’s new, bland romance because… well, that’s her whole schtick.

It’s… awful.

You sit back, hands in your hair, groaning aloud. “What is this? Who would even read this?”

You glance at your notes. They’re a chaotic mess of random scribbles: “Idia = genius, but hates people,” “Villainess needs more fire,” and “Heroine? Too boring. Spice her up. Maybe dragons?”

Yeah. This isn’t working.

You slump in your chair, utterly defeated. The characters are good, great even! But the plot? Oh, the plot is a dumpster fire. No, worse. It’s a flaming dumpster floating down a river of bad decisions. You can’t believe you spent hours writing this.

That’s it. You’re scrapping the entire thing. You’ll keep the characters, sure. But the story? Gone. Deleted. No one needs to suffer through this mess.

Determined, you crack your knuckles and reach for the keyboard, ready to hit the big red “DELETE” button on your disasterpiece.

“Say goodbye to this trash heap,” you mutter, “and hello to some actual good writing.”

But, alas, the universe has other plans.

Just as your finger hovers over the delete key, the worst possible thing happens. Your elbow, as if possessed by the forces of chaos itself, nudges the precariously balanced coffee cup on your desk. The liquid inside, which you had so carefully placed right next to your laptop like a ticking time bomb, tips. In slow motion, you watch the dark, caffeinated doom spill over the edge and land directly onto your keyboard.

“No, no, no, no, NO!” you shout, lunging forward, but it’s too late.

The coffee floods your keys like a tidal wave of misfortune. Your laptop makes a sickening little noise, a soft bzzt, and the screen flickers ominously. You sit there, frozen in horror, watching your computer sizzle as if it’s been cursed by the gods of terrible life choices.

And then—just when you think it couldn’t get worse—it gets worse.

There’s a small, but very real, spark. You flinch back, because nothing good ever comes from sparks. The screen flickers violently, the keys start to buzz, and then—before you can even process what’s happening—you feel it.

ZAP!

Electricity courses through your body. Your vision flashes white, your muscles seize, and in one horrifyingly comedic moment, you realize you’re being electrocuted by your own laptop.

You’d scream if you could, but all you manage is a high-pitched whimper before everything goes black.

Dead. You’re dead. Killed by your own coffee and a poorly thought-out novel. Fantastic.

You blink your eyes open, your head pounding like you’ve been hit with a ton of bricks—or, more likely, an electrical charge. Slowly, your vision clears, and you find yourself… staring at an unfamiliar, ornately decorated ceiling.

Where the hell are you?

You sit up with a groan, and that’s when it hits you: the bed. It’s massive, plush, and absurdly luxurious—definitely not your usual ratty mattress. Panic sets in, and you scramble out of bed, only to catch your reflection in a nearby mirror.

It’s not your reflection.

Oh.

Oh, Shit.

Staring back at you is her. The villainess. The sharp-tongued, drama-fueled antagonist of your novel. The one with a penchant for ruining lives and stealing the spotlight. The one you made up.

You gasp, gripping the sides of the mirror. “No. NO.” You stare at the dark hair cascading over your shoulders, the perfectly arched brows, and the terrifyingly intense smirk that seems to have a life of its own. “Why am I her? Why this of all characters?”

You step back from the mirror and slap your cheeks, half hoping that’ll wake you up from this fever dream. It doesn’t. You’re still stuck in the body of the villainess, and with each passing second, reality—or whatever twisted version of it this is—sinks in deeper.

“Of course,” you mutter, throwing your hands up in frustration. “Of course this is my life now. I write the dumbest novel in existence, and this is what I get.” You pace in front of the mirror, ranting to no one in particular. “Who even thinks it’s a good idea to make me the villainess? Me?! I didn’t sign up for this!”

After a few minutes of thoroughly berating yourself—and by extension, the cosmic forces that brought you here—you finally stop, resting your hands on your hips.

“Okay. Fine. FINE. I’ll play your stupid game, universe.” You throw one last glare at your reflection. “But I’m not tormenting the heroine. Nope. She can have her stupid one-sided rivalry for all I care. I want nothing to do with this mess.”

The decision made, you shake your head and take a deep breath. “Alright, what’s next?” You glance around the villainess’s extravagant room, trying to figure out your next move. And then, a lightbulb goes off in your head.

Prince Idia.

In your novel, he’s socially awkward, reclusive, and definitely doesn’t deserve to get caught up in this disaster. He’s just collateral damage in your sorry excuse for a plot, and honestly? You feel kinda bad about it.

You snap your fingers. “That’s it. I’ll find Prince Idia. Save him or something. Maybe I can even get a reward for rescuing a royal!” You’re feeling pretty good about this plan—much better than sticking around and causing drama with the heroine, at least.

With a dramatic flourish (you are still the villainess, after all), you head for the door, ready to track down Idia and redeem yourself in whatever twisted way you can manage. Who knows, maybe this whole situation won’t be as bad as you thought.

Or… maybe it’ll be even worse. But you’ll cross that bridge when you get to it.

After what feels like hours of arguing with your stubborn, uptight butler—who is absolutely convinced that your decision to head straight for the abandoned palace at the edge of town is the worst idea you’ve ever had—you finally break free.

“If anyone was kidnapped, that’s where they’d be!” you shout over your shoulder as you march toward your carriage, ignoring his protests about "safety" and "reckless behavior."

Butler or not, you’re on a mission. And after a bumpy ride to the palace, here you are, standing at the entrance, waiting for the traps or menacing guards to pounce.

...Nothing.

It’s strangely anticlimactic, actually. You push open the door, expecting maybe a cackle or some ominous fog. But no, just dust and an eerie silence. You frown, stepping cautiously inside.

“What kind of royal abduction is this? Budget cuts?”

Just as you’re about to chalk this whole thing up to a monumental waste of time, you hear it—a low curse, followed by the distinct sound of tinkering. You freeze, listening closer.

Definitely someone messing with something.

Your hand instinctively reaches for your trusty gun (bless past-you for deciding guns belonged in this novel), and with practiced ease, you pull it out and slam open the nearest door.

"Hands up!" you yell, pointing the barrel directly at—

A very, very scared Prince Idia, crouching beside what looks like a half-assembled mechanical gadget. His wide, shocked eyes meet yours, and he lets out a startled yelp, nearly knocking over the tools scattered around him.

"Wh-What the hell?!" you blurt, lowering the gun slightly. This was not the daring rescue scene you imagined.

Idia flinches, awkwardly raising his hands. “I—uh, I don’t know who you are, but how did you even find me?!” he stammers, looking at you like you just kicked his favorite gaming console.

"How did I—? Are you kidding me?" You gesture dramatically with the gun, still in shock. "I’m one of the people you were supposed to choose from! Remember? The whole ‘Battle for the Hand of Prince Idia’ thing?”

He blinks at you, deadpan. “Oh… Oh, no,” he mutters, more to himself than you. “Absolutely not. I’m not going back. I staged this whole thing for a reason.” He crosses his arms, stubborn. “I’ll just stay here with my gadgets. You can go back to… whatever you do.”

You stare at him, flabbergasted. “What do you mean you staged this?” You glance around the dusty, decrepit palace. “This is your brilliant escape plan? Hiding out in the palace equivalent of a haunted IKEA?”

He sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Look, it’s quiet, it’s out of the way, and no one bothers me here. I didn’t get kidnapped, okay? I just—didn’t want to deal with all the royal court nonsense.” He shrugs, as if staging a fake kidnapping is the most logical thing in the world.

“You do realize that Ortho is still at the palace, right? Your little brother? Alone? Without you?” You raise an eyebrow, watching the slow dawning horror creep across Idia’s face.

“Yeah, so?” He huffs. “He’s the Crown Prince now. I’m sure he’s fine—"

“Bro,” you interrupt, “have you seen high society? Ortho’s gonna get eaten alive. Not to mention the other princes aren’t just gonna let him waltz around with a crown on his head without making his life miserable.”

Idia’s eyes go wide, his brain clearly working overtime as the realization hits him like a ton of bricks. “Oh… Oh no. I didn’t think of that.”

You nod sagely. “Yeah. Big oops.”

He stares at the ground, looking like he’s physically shrinking under the weight of his own bad decisions. And then—something unthinkable happens.

“Help me,” he says, his voice desperate. He looks up at you with pleading eyes. “Please. I’ll—I’ll make you anything you want, build you gadgets, whatever you need! Just help me navigate high society while I… hide in the shadows or whatever.”

You stare at him in disbelief. “Are you… Are you asking me to pose as your fake fiancée?”

Idia flushes crimson, his hands flailing. “N-No! Well, maybe? Yes. I mean, yeah, but it’s not like I want to—" He groans, burying his face in his hands. “Just… ugh. Yes. Please.”

You cross your arms, tapping your chin. “Hmm. Fake engagement, huh? Alright, but only if you give me a beach house when this farce is over and Ortho officially takes the crown.”

Idia looks up at you, blinking in surprise. “A beach house? That’s your condition?”

You smirk. “Hey, I know what I want. So, do we have a deal?”

He hesitates for a moment, but then sighs, defeated. “Fine. You get the beach house. Just… make sure no one talks to me. Or atleast, you have to handle almost all the talking.”

With a satisfied nod, you extend your hand. “Deal.”

Idia, still red-faced and awkward, shakes your hand. You can’t help but wonder what sort of chaos you’ve just agreed to—but at least you’re getting a beach house out of it.

Sneaking Idia back to your manor wasn’t the most glamorous affair. He insisted on wearing a cloak, “for dramatic effect,” even though the streets were practically empty.

"You know, for a guy who's supposed to be a genius, you're real bad at blending in," you deadpan as he stumbles over his own cloak.

"It’s supposed to make me inconspicuous," Idia mutters, pulling the hood down further. "People see a cloak, they assume you’re some weirdo and leave you alone. It’s basic stealth mechanics."

“Uh-huh. And tripping on it helps too?”

“Shut up.”

Once inside the manor, you sit him down to discuss the details of how you’re going to spin this whole ‘rescue’ thing. Idia, now a little more at ease, starts fiddling with some gadget he pulled from one of his cloak’s hidden pockets. You can't tell if he's actually paying attention, but you figure you’d better get started.

"Okay," you say, leaning in like you’re about to hatch the greatest scheme of your life. "We need a story. Something grand. Heroic. Full of intrigue, mystery—"

“Or we could just say I, uh, got lost?” Idia offers halfheartedly. “And you happened to find me by accident. That sounds more plausible.”

You shoot him a look. "Idia, this is high society. No one ‘just gets lost for 3 months.’ We need something more exciting. Like, I fought off a band of rogue kidnappers—"

“Did you now?”

“And there was this epic battle—"

“With what? Your sense of direction?”

You glare. “Focus. We need an alibi."

Idia sighs. “Fine, whatever. Make it sound cool, but not too cool. If it’s too impressive, people will start thinking I owe you something.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I already have an idea of what you owe me,” you say, smirking.

His eyes narrow in suspicion, but you move on.

"Alright, so I 'bravely' tracked you down to the abandoned palace—"

"Because obviously that's where I'd be hiding," Idia interrupts sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

"—and I singlehandedly defeated a gang of ruthless kidnappers, saving you from a life of captivity. You, overwhelmed by my gallantry, are forever in my debt—"

Idia snorts. "Forever in your debt? Yeah, right. You're more likely to find me dead than in your debt."

“Just go with it. It’s a good story.”

Eventually, you both settle on a suitably ridiculous tale where you, after days of tireless investigation, heroically rescued him from an evil plot to overthrow the royal family. It's unnecessarily elaborate, full of conveniently absent witnesses and a dramatic escape from a non-existent dungeon. The whole thing’s so ridiculous, you almost feel bad for making anyone listen to it.

“Right,” you say, standing up. “Now we just need to sell this at court.”

When you arrive at the palace, Idia hangs back while you step forward, playing your part as the "heroic rescuer." Ortho’s the first one to spot you, and when his eyes land on Idia, they widen with shock and excitement.

“Brother!” Ortho shouts, practically flying over to tackle Idia in a hug. “I knew you’d come back!”

Idia, not really one for public displays of affection, awkwardly pats Ortho’s head. “Yeah, yeah, don’t make a big deal out of it,” he grumbles, though you can see the tiny smile tugging at his lips. “I was, uh, working on some top-secret stuff. Y’know, important genius-level projects.”

Ortho beams. “That sounds just like you!”

You have to hold back a snicker. Yeah, real “top-secret.” Like avoiding social interaction at all costs.

Soon, you’re ushered into the royal court. The king—who clearly knows something is up—doesn't look remotely surprised by the "revelation" that Idia was never actually kidnapped. But, because royal politics are weird, he plays along.

“So, Prince Idia,” the king says, raising an eyebrow, “I suppose you’ll want the Crown Prince title back now that you’ve returned?”

Idia freezes, panic flashing in his eyes. "Uh, absolutely not. Hard pass. Nope. Ortho’s got it handled, right? He can keep the whole… crown… thing.”

Ortho nods eagerly from behind him. “I’ve got it covered!”

The king sighs but nods. “Very well. And what about you?” He turns to you. “Surely, a brave soul such as yourself deserves a reward.”

Here it comes. You’ve rehearsed this with Idia, but now that you’re on the spot, you can’t help the dramatic flair in your voice as you clasp your hands together and say, “All I ask… is for Prince Idia’s hand.”

The king looks thoroughly amused, while Idia, beside you, is turning a very interesting shade of red.

“What?” Idia hisses under his breath. “That was not the line.”

You grin, leaning closer. “Yeah, but you have to admit, it’s funnier this way.”

To his credit, Idia doesn’t collapse on the spot, though he does look like he’s reconsidering his life choices.

Meanwhile, from across the room, you catch the third prince—your so-called "male lead"—glaring daggers at you. He looks like he's about to burst a blood vessel, while the heroine next to him is scandalized beyond belief.

“B-but Idia’s hand was supposed to be won!” she protests, clearly flustered.

You tilt your head innocently. “Oh? Not satisfied with the third Prince?” you ask, batting your lashes at her.

Her face goes red, and the Bland Prince—whoever he is—looks equally scandalized.

Next to you, Idia quietly high-fives you behind his back.

“Nice one,” he whispers.

As you both walk away from the court, Idia glances over at you, his usual sarcasm softened by relief. “You know, I really thought I’d end up hating this whole scheme, but you’re not bad at playing the part.”

You chuckle, nudging him. “Told you it’d be fun. And now I get a beach house, so it’s a win-win.”

Idia sighs but can’t hide the smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah, yeah. Just don’t make me go to any more parties, okay?”

“Deal.”

You’re sitting across from Idia in the study, supposedly "spending time together" to prove to the world how deeply smitten you both are. In reality, though, you’re plotting out your beach house retirement plan, while Idia is hunched over his latest gadget, muttering like a mad scientist.

"Okay, so if I tweak this—boom, self-repairing AI drone. Easy. The idiots at court would never get it," he whispers to himself, eyes glued to the wires and gears he's fiddling with.

You’re busy doodling floor plans of your dream beach house, adding an extra pool for fun. “Yeah, totally, sweetheart,” you mumble, pretending to listen. This fake relationship thing is going swimmingly.

That’s when the door flies open, and in waltzes the male lead—of course he doesn't knock. The guy practically drips entitlement as he saunters in, admiring himself in the reflection of a spoon he’s for some reason carrying.

Without missing a beat, you and Idia scramble to look like actual lovers. You slide closer to him, casually tossing an arm over his shoulders, and he—already flustered—just stiffens like he’s been caught in a trap.

“I see you two are enjoying each other’s company,” the male lead says, not even looking up from his spoon reflection. “I came to invite you to the tea party. You know, with all the nobles. The whole ‘Idia’s too traumatized to socialize’ excuse isn’t gonna fly anymore. It’s been three months.”

Idia’s eyes widen, and you can practically hear his soul leave his body. You give him a reassuring nudge.

“Don’t worry,” you whisper. “I’ll do all the talking. You just have to sit there, sip tea, maybe nibble on a pastry, and nod at Ortho. I’ve got the rest covered.”

Idia doesn’t look convinced, but he nods anyway. “Sure, sure, as long as I don’t have to, like, interact.”

The two of you arrive at the tea party, and the moment you step into the garden, you realize you're absolutely screwed. It’s not a tea party at all—it’s some weird medieval Olympics with archery targets set up, and a bunch of nobles are taking turns shooting arrows while their wives cheer them on.

“What… is this?” you whisper, horrified. “Why are there archery targets at a tea party? Is this... a misogyny power trip?”

Idia looks like he wants the ground to swallow him whole. He’s already backing away slowly, trying to make his great escape, but you grab him by the back of his cloak before he can bolt.

He shoots you a look like you’ve just committed the ultimate betrayal. “This... is not a tea party. You said tea and pastries. Where are the pastries?!”

“I didn’t know!” you hiss back. “I thought we’d just sip tea and gossip about whose cousin married whose horse!”

Before either of you can make another move, the heroine spots you and immediately latches onto your arm, dragging you to the tea table. At the same time, the male lead grabs Idia and hauls him over to the archery side.

"Wait—no—uh—" Idia stammers, but he’s already been thrown into the testosterone-fueled chaos of nobles trying to outdo each other.

Thinking fast, you impulsively declare, “I’ll be the one doing the archery! For my fiancé, of course. You know, because those thugs that kidnapped him? They had bows too!”

Idia, catching on, immediately puts on his best terrified expression. “Y-Yeah! Bows! I’m… I’m still traumatized! Please don’t make me relive it.”

The crowd collectively gasps, and you inwardly pat yourself on the back. Nailed it.

Somehow, despite knowing absolutely nothing about archery, you end up winning the whole thing. Turns out, none of the nobles have actually seen a bow before. You didn’t even hit the bullseye—you just got the arrow near the target, which was apparently enough to impress them.

The prize? A complex-looking mechanical device, something straight out of Idia’s dream workshop. You look at it, completely clueless, before handing it over to him.

“Uh, here. I have no idea what to do with this.”

Idia stares at the device, his eyes wide in disbelief. “You’re… giving it to me?” He looks touched but also suspicious. “You’re not gonna ask for some crazy favor in return?”

You shake your head. “Nah. It’s all yours. Consider it a thank-you for not leaving me to deal with this disaster alone.”

He blinks, clearly not used to receiving gifts without strings attached. “Well… uh, thanks. And… good job on the archery. You, uh, really sold the ‘traumatized fiancé’ bit.”

Before you can respond, the rest of the nobles start talking about "true love," and you can practically feel the heroine’s eyes boring holes into you. She’s fuming, glaring at the male lead—who, by the way, didn’t win—and looks like she’s about five seconds away from tearing out her hair.

You shoot her a smug grin, thoroughly enjoying her frustration. Idia, who’s been watching the whole thing with mild amusement, lightly bumps you with his elbow.

“Thanks for… you know, saving me from whatever that was. And for giving me this… thing,” he says, holding up the device.

“No problem,” you reply, smirking. “I think we’re pulling off this whole ‘smitten lovers’ thing pretty well.”

Idia snorts, trying to suppress a smile. “Yeah, well, if you keep dragging me to ‘tea parties’ like this, we’re gonna need to come up with a better plan. Preferably one where I don’t have to socialize with archery-obsessed nobles.”

“Deal,” you laugh. "Next time, I'll find a real tea party."

"Please don't."

You’re lounging on a comfy chair, lazily chatting with Ortho, who’s happily explaining some new contraption he and Idia worked on. You’re half-listening, more focused on sipping tea and enjoying the rare moment of peace in this chaotic castle.

That is, until Idia suddenly appears in front of you, looking unusually determined. He stands there, awkwardly shifting his weight, before thrusting his hand out in front of you.

Without thinking, you blink up at him and, in your confusion, place your chin on his outstretched palm. You give him a questioning look, waiting for further instruction.

Idia’s face immediately flushes a deep red. “W-What are you doing?! That’s not—I didn’t—gah!”

Ortho’s trying not to laugh, but it’s clear he’s barely holding it together.

“What?” you ask innocently. “You held out your hand, so I thought…”

Idia runs a hand through his hair, clearly flustered, before spluttering, “I—no, I was asking for your gun!”

“Oh. Right.” Without hesitation, you hand him the trusty weapon you always keep on hand, because at this point, you’ve learned to never question what Idia needs. It’s always better that way.

“Thanks,” he mutters, grabbing it like he’s on a mission and rushing off to whatever secret lair he retreats to.

You glance at Ortho, who’s giggling to himself. “Do you think I should be worried about that?”

“Nah,” Ortho says with a cheerful shrug. “He’s probably just making modifications. He’ll be fine!”

The next day, your luck runs out. Just when you were hoping for another peaceful afternoon, the heroine arrives for a surprise visit, dragging along her little posse of noble followers. You’re seated in a stiff parlor chair, forced to endure the barrage of small talk and fake smiles, feeling as if the universe is punishing you for all the nonsense you wrote in that novel.

One of the heroine’s cronies leans in with a sickeningly sweet voice, “Oh my, Lady Heroine, I just love your new gown. You look positively radiant. Unlike some people who seem to… dress for comfort, I suppose.”

You shoot her a withering glare, but it’s hard to focus when the heroine herself joins in, adding with a falsely sympathetic tone, “It must be so difficult for you, pretending to fit into high society. I can’t imagine how exhausting it must be, keeping up appearances.”

You’re just about to snap back when, suddenly, the door bursts open. In comes Idia, holding your gun, looking both determined and completely out of his element. For a brief, terrifying moment, you wonder what kind of chaos he’s about to unleash.

Before you can ask, he walks straight over to you and hands it to you, his expression serious. “Here. I finished the modifications.”

Your jaw drops as Idia starts rattling off a list of improvements. “So, I increased the firepower by 30%, added a cooling mechanism so it doesn’t overheat, and now it’s got an auto-targeting system that can scan multiple threats at once. Oh, and I swapped the trigger to be more responsive, so you won’t have any lag—”

You can’t help but notice how animated he looks. His usual deadpan expression is replaced by a lively spark in his eyes as he talks about all the intricate details. He’s completely in his element, and you find yourself enchanted by the way he speaks. It’s rare to see him so passionate, so alive.

The moment is shattered when he finally notices the others in the room. His face drains of color, and he gives a forced smile that screams I don't want to be here. Without another word, he turns on his heel and flees the room. But you notice something strange—he had been holding your hand the entire time. His grip, tight and warm, leaves a lingering sensation even after he’s gone.

You’re left holding your newly modified gun, your face heating up as you process what just happened. The heroine's entourage are all staring at you with wide eyes, as if they’ve just witnessed the most romantic moment of the century. Even the butler, who’s usually the epitome of professionalism, is grinning like he’s just uncovered the secret to eternal happiness. The maids nearby are giggling behind their hands, clearly entertained.

You glance down at the gun, then back to where Idia disappeared. Great, you think to yourself. How am I supposed to survive this?

As if reading your mind, the heroine gives you a smug smile. “It seems your fiancé is quite… attached. How charming.”

You roll your eyes, trying to ignore the sudden rush of blood to your cheeks. “Yeah, he’s a real romantic,” you mutter sarcastically.

But even as you try to brush it off, your thoughts keep returning to that sparkle in Idia’s eyes, the way he had held your hand, and the way his enthusiasm had made your heart skip a beat. Maybe this royal con is going to be more complicated than you expected… but also, maybe not as bad as you feared.

Dragging Idia to get fitted for the imperial ball is like trying to drag a cat into a bathtub. He’s actively resisting, feet planted as you haul him toward the tailor with all the enthusiasm of a man being led to the gallows.

“Why do you keep doing this to me?” he groans, leaning back so far you think he might just throw himself on the floor in protest. “An angel loses its wings every time you make me do this. Do you want heaven to be wingless? Is that what you want? To singlehandedly destroy heaven?”

“I’m aiming to open a black market for wings, yes,” you say, deadpan, yanking him forward. “The profits will be incredible.”

“You’re a menace,” he mutters, shuffling along behind you, still resisting like a particularly stubborn mule. “Just put me in a broom closet with a bag of chips and leave me there. I don’t need to go to this ball. No one wants to see me.”

“I do,” you quip. “I’m dragging you into society, one unwilling step at a time.”

By the time you actually manage to get him dressed, you feel like you’ve aged five years. But when you take a step back to admire the result, it’s worth it. Idia looks stunning, even if he’s fidgeting like his clothes are secretly made of fire ants. He’s basically the human version of a rare collectible: usually hidden away, but absolutely jaw-dropping when you finally get to see him.

“Alright, Prince Drama,” you say, exhaling, “I’m going to get dressed. Try not to set anything on fire while I’m gone.”

When you return, you immediately notice something’s up. Ortho’s whispering something to Idia, and whatever it is, it’s causing a nuclear-level blush to spread across his face. He’s stiff as a board, and when he turns around and sees you in your ball attire, he goes straight from “mildly panicked” to “catastrophic system error.”

Without warning, he chucks a flower at you. Just full-on throws it like it’s a projectile weapon.

“Here,” he croaks out, his voice cracking halfway through.

You blink, catching the flower mid-air with one hand. “Uh, thanks? Were you... trying to plant this on me?”

Idia’s face somehow manages to get even redder. “No—I mean yes—I mean—” He looks around for help, but Ortho just gives him an unhelpful thumbs up from the corner.

You grin, deciding to help the poor guy out. “Why don’t you pin it in my hair instead?”

His hands shake as he fumbles with the pin, and you’re pretty sure he’s using every ounce of self-control not to stab you in the scalp. You bite your lip, trying not to laugh, but the whole situation is just too funny. Especially when Ortho gives you a conspiratorial wink from behind Idia’s back like he’s this close to winning a bet.

The ball itself is, as expected, a social hellscape. You and Idia survive by sticking together like conjoined twins, fending off the waves of nosy nobles and fake smiles. You can practically see the stress radiating off of Idia, his expression one of pure misery.

And then, the king makes his grand address, signaling the start of the first dance. You feel Idia stiffen beside you.

“Oh no,” he mutters, “Oh no. This is where it all goes downhill. I’ll trip, I’ll break my leg, and then they’ll throw me in the royal dungeon for embarrassing the family.”

“Relax,” you say, squeezing his hand. “It’s just one dance. I’ll lead, you follow. Easy.”

“I hate this,” he mumbles as you drag him onto the floor. “I hate everything about this. I should have just set myself on fire and gotten out of it that way.”

But despite his protests, you manage to lead him through the first few steps of the waltz. To your surprise, he’s not completely hopeless. He stumbles a little at first, but with you guiding him, he starts to get the hang of it.

“You’re doing great,” you say encouragingly.

“Stop lying,” he grumbles. “I’m one misstep away from taking us both out like a bowling ball hitting pins.”

The music continues, and with every turn and spin, you notice the room around you fading into the background. For a moment, it’s just you and Idia, navigating the intricate steps of the dance together. He’s still anxious, but he’s keeping up, and more importantly, you can tell he’s starting to trust you. He’s letting you take the lead, and for someone like Idia, that’s huge.

From Idia’s perspective, this entire ball is a waking nightmare. He’s completely out of his element, surrounded by people he’d normally go to great lengths to avoid. But then there’s you. You’re handling everything with this... ease, this grace that he can’t even begin to comprehend. You’re not just dancing with him, you’re actively navigating the minefield of court politics like it’s no big deal.

And you don’t need to do this. This isn’t your problem—it’s Ortho’s succession, not yours. But you’re here, by his side, going all out to make sure Ortho’s future is secure. Idia’s heart twists in his chest. He doesn’t get it. You’re way too cool for this. Too cool for him. You wink at him mid-spin, and he feels like his brain’s short-circuiting.

"Oh no. I like them. Like, really like them. And soon, they’ll be gone. This whole engagement is just for show. After Ortho’s investiture, we’ll go back to our separate lives, right?"

He swallows hard, trying not to freak out, but it’s too late. He’s in way too deep.

After the dance, you lead him off the floor and start mingling with the other nobles, making alliances and doing your whole “political mastermind” thing. Idia stands awkwardly to the side, trying to blend into the wallpaper, but his eyes keep following you. You don’t have to do all this for Ortho, but you are. And that’s... that’s really cool. He admires you, he can’t help it.

And then—oh no. The lower nobles. They spot him and beeline toward him like sharks smelling blood. Before he can make a break for it, they swarm around him, throwing party invitations at him like confetti.

“Prince Idia, you simply must attend our garden soirée next week,” one of them gushes, eyes sparkling.

“And our evening gala!” another pipes up. “You’ll be the guest of honor, of course!”

Idia’s face goes pale, and he shoots you a look that screams, HELP ME.

You swoop in like a knight in shining armor. “Ah, yes, well, unfortunately, Idia can’t attend. He’s... uh... allergic to sunlight.”

The nobles stare at you, blinking in confusion. Idia stares at you too, his expression a mix of disbelief and amusement.

“Allergic to... sunlight?” one noble repeats, frowning.

You facepalm. Smooth. “I mean... it’s a joke! Ha! Obviously! What I meant to say is... uh...” You scramble for an excuse. “I need a nap.”

There’s a beat of silence.

“I—uh—can’t sleep without him,” you blurt out. “It’s, uh, a couple thing.”

The nobles blink at you again, thoroughly bewildered.

You grab Idia’s arm, muttering, “We’re leaving,” and make a quick exit, practically dragging him behind you.

As soon as you’re out of earshot, you let out a groan. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I said that. ‘Allergic to sunlight’? Really?”

Idia is doubled over laughing, completely losing it. “You what?!” he howls. “You need a nap? And you can’t sleep without me?!”

“Shut up!” you say, cheeks burning. “I was trying to save you!”

“You saved me? More like doomed me!” He wheezes between laughs, clutching his stomach. “Oh man, you are terrible at this. You make me look good, and that’s saying something.”

You glare at him, but his laughter is so infectious that you can’t stay mad. And honestly? He looks free. Unbridled, even. It’s the first time you’ve seen him laugh so openly, so without reservation, that it almost makes you forget how embarrassing the situation was.

Almost.

It's finally time for Ortho's investiture, and to say you feel unprepared would be an understatement. Not for any political reason—you've long since mastered the art of navigating court intrigue. No, the issue is far more personal, far more heart-wrenching. After today, once Ortho is declared Crown Prince, Idia will no longer have any excuse to stay in the spotlight. He'll retreat, back into the shadows, probably even fake his own kidnapping to get out of any future public events. And you?

You'll finally get that peaceful beach house you’ve been dreaming about.

But the thought doesn’t feel like a reward. It feels bitter. You don’t want that beach house—not if it means losing Idia. The man who’s wormed his way into your heart with his sarcasm, awkwardness, and hidden kindness.

But you know he’s not someone you can tie down. Idia doesn’t do well with permanence. And as much as your heart begged to hold on to him, you also know he’d likely slip through your fingers if you tried.

So you do what any self-respecting person would in this situation: put on a brave face, slip into your formal attire, and prepare to smile your way through heartbreak.

When you walk out to greet Idia, he’s already dressed in his formal robes, looking every bit the reluctant royal. His eyes widen slightly when he sees you, but he says nothing, fidgeting with the hem of his sleeve.

You muster up the strength to smile and reach for his hand. “Ready?”

He nods, but neither of you can meet the other’s eyes.

From Idia’s perspective, today should feel like a victory. He’s been planning for Ortho’s investiture for months, and now that the day is finally here, he should be feeling nothing but relief. But no—he’s filled with an overwhelming sense of dread. It’s not about Ortho. His little brother is brilliant, and Idia knows the kingdom is in good hands.

No, what he’s not ready for is letting you go.

If someone had told him a year ago that he would care about someone—want someone—so desperately, he would’ve locked them up in a mental facility. But here he is, standing on the precipice of his worst nightmare.

You, who shine in every public setting, who effortlessly charm everyone around you, are going to move on. He knows he can’t tie you down with his reclusive lifestyle, his constant desire to escape from the world. How could he? You’re everything he’s not—bright, resplendent, beloved. He can’t ask you to give up your life for him.

But when you come out and take his hand, his heart skips a beat. Neither of you are able to look each other in the eye, but the gesture says more than any words could.

The investiture itself goes off without a hitch. Ortho’s speech is flawless, full of the hope and wisdom of a ruler who will no doubt lead the kingdom into a golden age. You’re so proud of him—of the boy who’s become like a little brother to you.

But even as you smile and clap with the rest of the court, you feel a heaviness in your chest that has nothing to do with the political spectacle unfolding before you.

A few tears slip down your cheeks, and you don’t even know if they’re from the overwhelming pride you feel for Ortho or the quiet heartbreak you’ve been trying to suppress all day.

Before you can wipe them away, Idia silently hands you his handkerchief. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even look at you, and that just makes the ache in your heart a little worse.

You take it with a quiet, “Thanks,” dabbing at your eyes, and you both stand there in tense silence, watching as the formalities continue around you.

Once the investiture concludes and the guests filter out, you and Idia retreat to a balcony to catch your breath. The sky is darkening, and the cool evening breeze does little to soothe the heaviness you feel in the pit of your stomach.

Idia breaks the silence first. "I've, uh... already arranged the beach house. It’s in your name now."

You blink, looking over at him. His voice cracks slightly, and when you finally turn to face him fully, you realize that he looks like the very picture of heartbreak. He’s not meeting your eyes, staring out into the distance as if it’ll keep him from falling apart.

You swallow hard, trying to keep your voice steady. “Idia... do you want me to leave?”

He freezes, still not looking at you. "I... I want you to be happy. I mean, that's the whole point, right? The beach house, everything—you’ve been wanting that for ages."

“I didn’t ask if you wanted me to be happy,” you say quietly. “I asked if you want me to stay or go.”

The silence between you stretches, heavy and suffocating. You hold your breath, waiting for him to answer. When he finally speaks, his voice is barely above a whisper.

“I... I don’t know what I’m gonna do if you’re not here anymore.”

That’s all the confirmation you need. Before he can say anything else, you step forward, cupping his face and pulling him into a kiss. For a split second, he stiffens, shocked, but then he melts into it, his arms wrapping around you like he’s afraid you might disappear if he lets go.

It’s everything you needed and more—sweet, desperate, and filled with all the words neither of you have been able to say. When you finally pull away, you rest your forehead against his, both of you breathing heavily.

“Come with me,” you whisper. “To the beach house. We can... we can figure everything out from there.”

Idia lets out a watery laugh, one that’s half-disbelief, half-relief. “You really want a shut-in like me hanging around your dream house? You’re gonna get sick of me in a week.”

You smile, brushing a strand of hair away from his face. “I don’t think I could ever get sick of you. So... what do you say?”

He hesitates for a moment, then gives a small nod, his eyes shining with unshed tears. “Yeah... okay. I’ll come with you.”

And just like that, the weight that’s been pressing down on your chest all day lifts. It’s not the end—it’s a new beginning. One where you and Idia don’t have to part ways, where you can move forward together.

As you both stand there on the balcony, holding each other close, the world feels a little less daunting, and the future a little brighter.

The grand hall is slowly emptying out, nobles drifting away after offering their congratulations to Ortho. You and Idia maneuver through the lingering crowd, dodging overly-friendly dukes and avoiding eye contact with barons hoping to extend the festivities.

Idia clings to your arm like a cat being dragged to the vet, mumbling, “Please tell me we’re not about to be emotionally ambushed again.”

You smirk. “Relax. It’s just Ortho.”

“Yeah, that’s what you always say before things get sentimental and I have to deal with ‘feelings.’”

You spot Ortho standing near the dais, still wearing the ceremonial robes from his investiture. Despite the long night, he looks bright-eyed, waving cheerfully at some departing courtiers. When he catches sight of you two, his face breaks into the biggest grin, and he hurries over like an eager puppy.

“There you are!” Ortho beams, practically glowing with excitement. “I was worried you left without saying goodbye.”

“Us? Leave without saying goodbye?” you tease. “What kind of villains do you think we are?”

“Exactly the kind who would sneak away in the middle of a banquet,” Idia mutters under his breath. “And you know what? That plan still sounds great.”

Ortho rolls his eyes fondly. “You’re impossible, brother.”

“Only when I’m awake.”

“Anyway,” you cut in, shooting Idia a playful glare before turning back to Ortho, “we wanted to talk to you before we go.”

Ortho’s smile falters, just a bit. “You’re leaving already?”

You nod, squeezing Idia’s arm. “Yeah. We’re heading to the beach house.”

Ortho tilts his head, curious but not upset. “You’re moving there?”

“For a while, yeah,” you explain gently. “Idia and I need a break from all the court politics. But don’t worry. We’ll visit you. Often.”

Idia shifts beside you, scratching the back of his neck. “Yeah, uh... It’s not like I’m leaving forever or anything. Just... you know, temporarily escaping society.”

Ortho laughs, but there’s a softness in his gaze now. “I get it. I don’t blame you for wanting to leave all this behind for a bit.”

You take a step closer, voice lowering. “And hey... I know you’ve got a lot on your plate now. But we’re still family. If you need anything—anything—we’ll be here for you.”

Ortho’s grin returns, full force. “I know. I’m really glad you two have each other. Honestly, I was worried for a long time that Idia might never find someone willing to put up with him.”

“Gee, thanks,” Idia deadpans. “Glad my personal development arc has been so inspiring for you.”

“But seriously,” Ortho says, his expression softening again. “Thank you. You’ve done more for us than you had to. I know you could have just... gone back to your world or left things as they were. But you stayed. And you helped him.”

Oh no. Not this again. That suspicious prickle starts in your eyes, and you blink rapidly to fend off the tears. Not now. Not in public.

“You’re not... making me cry,” you insist, even as your voice wobbles. “This is just... allergy season.”

“Oh no, it’s happening,” Idia groans dramatically, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Please don’t cry. If you cry, Ortho’s gonna cry, and if Ortho cries, the nobles will definitely blame me.”

“Shut up, you big baby,” you sniffle, swatting his arm before pulling Ortho into a hug. “Come here, you. Group hug, now.”

Ortho barely has time to react before you’ve wrapped him up in your arms. He laughs, squeezing you back. You reach out blindly and grab Idia’s sleeve, yanking him into the fray.

“Wait—wait, what—!” Idia stumbles forward, sandwiched awkwardly between you and Ortho. “This is... I don’t...”

“Shhh,” you whisper, patting his back. “Feel the love.”

“This is emotional ambush!” Idia protests, voice muffled against your shoulder. “I want it on record that I was forced into this.”

“Noted,” Ortho says with a laugh, hugging both of you tighter. “But you’re not getting out of it.”

For a moment, the three of you just stand there, huddled together in a ridiculous knot of limbs, nobles glancing your way but tactfully avoiding comment.

Idia mutters into your ear, “This... this is basically treason against introverts.”

You grin. “Consider it penance for being emotionally stunted.”

“You’re both the worst,” he grumbles, but his arms stay wrapped around you.

Eventually, you pull back, wiping your eyes with the heel of your hand. “We’ll be back soon, Ortho. I promise.”

“I know.” Ortho smiles warmly, giving you one last squeeze. “And when you do, I’ll make sure you never have to attend another dull court event again.”

Idia perks up at that. “Oh. Now that’s what I call incentive.”

With one last shared laugh, the three of you break apart. Ortho steps back, standing tall and proud in his new role, though his smile still holds all the warmth of a little brother seeing his family off.

“Take care of him,” Ortho says quietly, glancing meaningfully at you.

“I plan to,” you reply, meeting his gaze with a small, reassuring smile.

“And you,” Ortho adds, looking at Idia. “Don’t screw this up.”

Idia gapes, indignant. “I—why does everyone assume I’m the one who’s going to screw it up?!”

You and Ortho exchange amused glances before both of you answer in perfect unison:

“Because you will.”

Idia groans. “Yeah, okay. Fair.”

With that, you bid Ortho one final goodbye, tugging Idia along before anyone else can rope you into small talk. As you leave the grand hall and step out into the cool night air, the weight on your shoulders feels a little lighter.

Idia sighs in relief. “Well, that’s over. Time to hibernate for the next decade.”

You chuckle, lacing your fingers through his. “Hibernation in the beach house?”

“Hell yeah.”

And with that, the two of you set off into the night, leaving the court behind—for now.

Oh, what happened to the heroine and the male lead, you ask? Let’s rewind a few months before Ortho’s investiture—back when they were still blissfully unaware of the elaborate downfall that awaited them.

You knew that the heroine and the male lead would try to make a spectacle of themselves during Ortho’s rise to power. The way they pranced around, flaunting their superficial charm and good looks like they owned the place—it was insufferable. And, of course, they were always scheming in the background, hoping to secure power and glory for themselves. You couldn’t stand it.

So, you set up the perfect trap.

It began at a lavish gala, one of those unnecessarily extravagant events where nobles gathered to network, gossip, and throw subtle insults at each other. You arrived fashionably late, as any proper duchess would, with Idia reluctantly in tow, mumbling under his breath about how every social event felt like “one of those long quests with zero rewards.”

“The rewards are emotional, Idia,” you whisper, linking arms with him.

“Yeah, emotional damage,” he mutters.

You suppress a smile, but your mind is elsewhere. Tonight is the night. You had planted the seeds weeks ago, a few well-placed rumors, some whispered insinuations, and a letter you’d accidentally left behind in a well-trafficked corridor. It was all coming together like a beautifully chaotic symphony, and now, the climax.

You spot the heroine first, her radiant smile masking the venom beneath. She’s making a grand entrance, arm-in-arm with the male lead, who, as always, looks like he’s stepped straight out of a romance novel. His hair is perfect, his jawline sharp enough to cut through glass. But you know better. They’re both so predictable.

“They’ve arrived,” you murmur to Idia.

He gives you a blank stare. “Yeah, cool, I’m just here to not die of social exhaustion. Whatever you’re planning... don’t tell me. I don’t wanna be involved.”

“Suit yourself,” you reply with a grin.

You watch them mingle, waiting for the right moment. And there it is—the heroine, attempting to cozy up to the king, laughing a little too loudly at one of his mediocre jokes. You slip through the crowd, making your way to where a certain nosy noblewoman is holding court. A noblewoman known for her love of gossip and her even greater love of ruining people’s lives with it.

Perfect.

You lean in, feigning concern. “Oh, My Lady... I probably shouldn’t say this, but I heard the strangest thing about the heroine. You won’t believe it.”

Her eyes gleam with curiosity. “Do tell, my dear.”

“Well,” you drop your voice to a whisper, “there’s talk that the heroine and the male lead are involved in some... unsavory business dealings. Something about embezzling funds from the royal coffers for their own gain? I don’t know how true it is, of course... but it would explain some things, wouldn’t it?”

You leave the rest unsaid, letting her imagination do the rest. The best part? It’s all technically true. You had orchestrated it so well, the heroine and the male lead had no idea that their “private” meetings and “innocent” financial maneuvers were anything but secret.

She gasps, her fan snapping shut. “I knew there was something off about them! Oh, the gall! I must inform the king immediately!”

And just like that, the gossip spreads like wildfire. Within minutes, the entire room is buzzing with scandalous whispers. The heroine and the male lead notice the shift, the way people start looking at them, and for the first time, they’re on the back foot. They try to smile, but their unease is palpable.

You sit back, watching the chaos unfold, sipping your wine as nobles begin to distance themselves from the pair, shooting them suspicious glances.

Idia sidles up next to you, looking around at the suddenly tense atmosphere. “What... what did you do?”

“Who, me?” You bat your eyelashes innocently. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

He gives you a side-eye. “You’re terrifying.”

“You knew that when you asked me to be your fake fiancée.”

The next day, official inquiries are launched into the heroine and the male lead’s finances, and though they try to clear their names, it’s no use. The damage is done. Their reputations are ruined beyond repair, and they’re forced to withdraw from court life entirely. A fitting end for their ambitions.

Which brings you to the present...

It’s a peaceful morning in your beach house, and you’re sitting on the veranda, enjoying your coffee while the sun rises over the horizon. The sound of waves crashing against the shore is your only company, and for once, there’s no looming political intrigue or royal drama to worry about.

That is, until Idia stumbles out of the bedroom, his hair a messy blue cloud, his eyes half-closed with sleep. He groans as he sees you, one hand on the wall to steady himself. “Why are you up so early? It’s like... the middle of the night.”

“It’s 10 AM,” you reply with a laugh.

“Exactly,” he grumbles, shuffling over to you. Without another word, he flops down beside you, his head immediately finding its way to your neck. He nuzzles into you, muttering something unintelligible, and you chuckle softly, patting him on the cheek.

“You’re such a big baby in the morning,” you tease, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead.

Despite being married for the past two years, Idia’s face turns tomato-red every time you do something affectionate. He blushes furiously now, burying his face in the crook of your neck to hide it.

“Y-You’re unfair,” he mumbles, voice muffled. “Saying stuff like that... it’s embarrassing.”

You grin. “But you’re so cute.”

“I’m not cute. I’m a grown man. And you’re a villain for making me get up before noon.”

You laugh, running your fingers through his messy hair. “Maybe, but I’m your villain. So deal with it.”

Idia groans dramatically but makes no effort to move away, too comfortable where he is. You continue sipping your coffee, enjoying the moment of peace, when he finally speaks again, a little softer this time.

“Y’know... you really did a number on the heroine and the male lead. They’re still laying low, huh?”

“Maybe the rumor I spread was truly a masterpiece,” you say with a smirk, remembering how perfectly everything had gone according to plan.

Idia snorts. “A masterpiece of destruction, maybe.”

You chuckle, pressing another kiss to his forehead. He sighs contentedly, the two of you basking in the quiet comfort of your shared life. It’s moments like this that remind you just how far you’ve come together, from court intrigue and scandal to peaceful mornings at your beach house.

And honestly? You wouldn’t have it any other way.

Series Masterlist ; Masterlist

For the next part,

[slaytheusurper]

⭑ In de middle of the night ⭑

Masterlist

A/N: I got a littleeee carried away with this one :)

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x sister!reader

Summary: Being married to Aegon brought you no pleasure, especially when it comes to the bedroom and you were still without an heir. However your sweet brother Aemond is willing to help you out.

Warnings: NSFW, mdni, teeny tiny bit angst but really tiny, targcest, aegon being drunk asf, kissing, handjob, oral, facesitting, tongue fucking, finger riding, vaginal sex, breeding kink and squirting.

Word count: 4.7k

You stared up at the canopy above you, deep in thought while your husband Aegon sloppily rutted into you. His thrusts fast and eager, he had trouble keeping his cock actually inside you. It was another one of those nights where he came into your chambers or summoned you to his, stinking of wine, slurring words and ‘demanding an heir’. Everytime he did this, it would start by you taking your clothes off and laying on his bed for him. He would, less gracefully, take his off too and almost trip and fall to the ground trying to get over to you on the bed.

He could barely get his cock hard with a few tugs and would slip it inside, or rather force it, and you wondered, was this how he fucked his whores too? So you laid there waiting for him to slip out and pass out on top of you, before even actually finishing inside you. But of course it was your fault there was no heir after 6 months of marriage. You didn’t even know why your mother, queen Alicent, thought it was a good idea to make your life a living hell by marrying you off to your least favourite brother. Aegon's complaints during the betrothal didn’t go unnoticed by you, what also didn’t go unnoticed was Aemond’s reply to every nasty comment Aegon made about you. 

“She’s boring, always reading and never dancing or drinking like the rest of us.” Aegon would say, already tipsy of his precious vintage wine. “She’s unique and smart, you should appreciate her brother.” Aemond would fire back. They never realised that you would listen in and gods did you love Aemond for his protective nature. He always had your back. When you had nightmares as a child and even sometimes still, you would go to him, because you knew he would never judge you. 

Pulled out of your thoughts, Aegon once again slipped out and stupidly drunk passed out on top of you. “Aegon? Did you- finish already?” You asked hesitantly. No response. So as usual you pushed him off you, left his bed to get your nightgown. Got dressed and left his chambers, disappointed and hurt once more. You walked down the dark and cold halls of the Red Keep, dragging your feet back to your own chambers. When you got back, your handmaiden had already drawn a bath for you, for every time you got summoned to his chambers, she knew you would come back uncomfortable and disappointed. She felt bad and always showed it by trying to get you clean and comfortable again so you could finally go to bed. 

A week later you were taking a stroll through the gardens, looking for your favourite butterflies. The sun beaming down on you as your handmaiden trailed behind you, the tiny rocks crunching under your feet. The gardens were pretty much empty which was rare on beautiful days like this. After a while of observing your favourite butterflies, the eastern tailed butterfly, you decided to take a seat under the canopy at the far left side of the gardens. It was one of your favourite spots, secluded and only the royals were allowed here. 

Your handmaiden handed you your book and summoned some wine and cheese for you to enjoy, when you were comfortable you sent her away. In much need of some alone time. Sitting in the soft breeze of the wind and the cool shadows of the canopy you let out a sigh. “Enjoying the day sister?” Your heart skipped a beat at Aemonds voice, he almost appeared out of nowhere and pulled a chair to join you. “Brother you scared me.” You said with a breathy laugh. “I apologise, I just wanted to spend some time outside after training today.” He smiled slightly as he poured himself some wine. “How did it go? Did you embarrass Cole again?” You smiled at the memory, eyes fixated on your book still. “I always embarrass him, but it never stops amusing me. So...what are you reading today?” Aemond tried to read the title, slightly leaning forward to do so. 

“If I tell you you’ll laugh.” You replied, pressing the back of the book on your lap. “So romance I take it, you know I would never make fun of you for that.” He said, sipping his wine and peering over at you. Your cheeks flushed at his words, conversation was always easy and comforting with him. You wondered why it couldn’t be like that with your own husband. “I...heard you strolling back to your own chambers in the middle of the night again.” He seemed to observe his wine cup while he spoke, too embarrassed to look at you. Because you knew exactly what he was hinting at. Did Aegon finally manage to do it? Is it still uncomfortable and unpleasant?

No one knew you talked to Aemond about this, you would be disgraced if they did. But he was the only one you could trust. If you told your mother she would just insist to keep trying and that all would be well. “Yes. I was.” You replied curtly, you wanted him to do something about it. Maybe he could talk to Aegon? Clearly your dear husband ignored his mother’s pleas to stop drinking so much and to bed you properly, but to no avail. “Is he still not?” He didn’t even dare finish that sentence for he knew when your face tensed up and looked back at your book. “I’m sorry.” That was all he could muster up to say. He didn’t want to insult his brother but he was getting tired of seeing you like this. And of course the blame was always on the woman if she wasn’t soon with child after marriage. 

You almost threw your book on the table and stood up to walk towards the balcony that overlooked the sea. “I love Aegon but why is he like this? Why can’t he do his duty? Why does he have to scorn me like this, again and again.” Your eyes teared up at the thought of never being able to produce an heir for the realm. You heard the sound of a chair scraping against the tiny stones and felt Aemond’s presence suddenly behind you. Feeling his breath against your right ear almost made you shudder. “If you were wed to me, I would’ve performed my duty. You would’ve already been swollen with my child.” His whispers made your heart skip a beat and heat pool in your belly. You closed your eyes when you felt his hands on your hips, slowly moving toward your stomach as if to hold that said swollen belly. 

“Aemond…” It almost came out as a moan, the thought of him bedding you, fucking his seed deep inside you, it made you feel things you never felt with Aegon. You always thought he was brave and handsome, but after that night when Lucerys Velaryon took his eye, he changed. For the better you thought. As you got older he took to wearing an eye patch and why did he have to look so damn good with it. “I have an idea, but you must not tell anyone. It would solve this problem...but we can’t speak about it now and not here. Come to my chambers tonight, if Aegon calls on you, which I doubt since he talked about sneaking off to Flea Bottom, then tell him you’re too tired.” He embraced you from behind and left you with that. 

The rest of the day was spent anxiously in the gardens, even at supper you were too nervous to look at Aemond or even at Aegon who was already drowning in his cups. You were stabbing at your chicken, trying to get a piece of bone out when your mother spoke up. “Aegon, must you drink so much every night?” She looked at him with a piercing gaze. For some reason his eyes landed on you when he spoke. “Yes.” Was all he said. Your mouth almost fell open. Did he mean to suggest that he was only drinking so much because of you? His wife? His perfect and nothing but loyal and dutiful wife? When Aegon looked back at his plate you looked at your mother. She gave you a sympathetic look before leaving the table to check on her own husband, the king, who had been in a bad state the last couple of weeks. You quickly left the table after her, walking back to your own chambers, your handmaiden once again following quickly behind you.

“Dyana, I require a bath right now.” Once you were in your chambers, your handmaiden drew your bath and after a while you were relaxing in the hot water. When you were finished you got dressed and left your beautiful silver locks down for the night. You always had long hair that stopped right above your butt, soft big curls and shiny hair. It was something you were very proud of. And tonight you wanted to show it off for Aemond. You still weren’t entirely sure what he was up to but gods did you hope that it was what you were thinking of. 

You decided on a white, silk nightgown that had long sleeves and a small cute bow in the middle of the quite low neckline. The sleeves were wide and very princess-like, with the skirt of the gown itself long, airy and light. You made sure to smell of vanilla and sugar and when it was completely dark, and everyone must surely be asleep, you sent your handmaiden away to “go to bed” and snuck out not too long after to Aemonds chambers. 

You moved as quiet as a mouse through the dark halls of the Red Keep, nervousness and excitement in your chest. After a while you arrived at the door of Aemond’s chambers, his guards thankfully already sent away by him. You softly knocked on his door and seconds after, he opened it, quickly letting you inside. He was dressed in a soft cotton shirt, pants and his black boots. And he still looked as handsome as ever. “Why don’t we sit down, sweet sister.” He motioned over to the two settees in the middle of his chamber. You both opted to sit next to each other. 

“Now, I want you to listen to me carefully. I have an idea on how we can provide heirs and keep you satisfied as well. But no one must ever find out. Not even mother and especially not Aegon.” He started. “Since I am not married, I could- bed you. And give the realm the heirs it so desperately needs.” He looked at you, he was always calm and collected but now even you could see the gleam of nervousness and excitement in his eye. You could only nod, it was incredibly disgraceful, treacherous even. But it was the perfect solution. “I need you to say it out loud, say that you want me.” He muttered, inching closer to grab your face. “Please Aemond, I want you. I need you.” You whispered already looking at his lips.

That was all he needed to let go of any self restraint he had. He smiled and leaned in to kiss you. His lips felt so soft, which was in contrast to his rough and masculine demeanour. After a second you moved your lips against his. You wanted to hold his face as well but were a bit too nervous to do so. His right hand was still on your cheek and his left arm went around your back, to hold you closer to him. Aegon almost never kissed you, so this new exciting feeling left you heated and wanting for more. Aemond deepened the kiss, he let his tongue slightly swipe over your lower lip, asking for entrance. You eagerly granted this and let his tongue explore your mouth.

You couldn’t help the tiny moan slip past your lips. Aemond groaned, and just the mere sound of this had you clenching your thighs. Your arousal taking over your mind, you grabbed his shirt and let your tongue mingle with his. His hand that was on your back pulled you even closer and the hand that was resting on your face slithered lower to your bottom and he couldn’t help himself, he grabbed it hard making you moan into his mouth. His sanity was slipping at the sounds of your pleasure, he wanted this for so long. He wanted to show Aegon exactly how he should be fucking his wife. 

“Do that- again.” You whimpered against his lips, for some reason, his manhandling turned you on. It was another side of him you had never known, the rougher Aemond, the Aemond that took what he wanted. He did as you commanded, grabbing your ass and giving it a harsh squeeze, which earned him another moan. Fuck- if he knew that this is what you wanted all along he would’ve done this 6 month’s ago. Before the wedding, to make you his, just so he could do this whenever he wanted. The friction of his pants on the tip of his hard cock got him even more riled up. It just felt so fucking good. At this point he’d do anything you commanded. He gave you another smack on your ass and groaned in your mouth. 

“Fuck- you love this don’t you, getting thrown around by me. Tell me it’s me you’ve always wanted, not Aegon.” He almost grunted the words against your lips, still feverishly moving against you. “It’s always been you and only you- If Aegon fucked me better- I could’ve at least imagned it was you bedding me- but even that he won’t grant me.” You spoke breathlessly against his lips. He removed his lips from yours and gave you a look that could make you finish right there and then. “Let me remove your dress and show you what your husband should’ve done all along.” He spoke in such a low and husky tone, you could feel the slick between your legs. 

You once again were at loss for words and simply stood in front of the seated man. He grabbed your skirt and stood up to help you lift off the dress that now felt too heavy on your body. Once the dress was raised above your head he threw it on the other settee behind you. Then you saw the lust in his eyes as he took in your body. “How could my idiot of a brother not absolutely devour you every night. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid my eyes upon. Let me treat you like the goddess you are.” He didn’t even let you respond before he lurched forward to lick and suck at your breasts leaving them slick with his saliva. “Oh Aemond- please- I need you so so so bad.” You almost sobbed when he let his middle finger glide between your wet folds. He drank in your moans as he let his finger explore your soft cunt. Already imagining how it would feel around his cock. That thought alone alongside the feeling of your wet pussy sent beads of precum dripping out of his aching tip. Leaving a dark sticky patch in his pants. 

When he decided that your nipples were aching and sensitive enough he finally let his mouth off them, a tiny spit trail connecting you. Then he started kissing down your stomach, even further down until he was on his knees. You were in complete awe of the sight before you and gods help you when he finally reached your cunt. Leaving a tiny peck right above your puffy clit he started to absolutely devour you. Licking and sucking at your wet folds, you moaned his name, whimpering and begging for air as he went. Never in your life had you felt this good and you only just started. You had to hold on to something so you grabbed his hair. And right as he sucked on your clit you pulled at his roots earning a moan from Aemond right against your clit. The vibration of it felt like heaven, he then grabbed your right leg and put it over his shoulder so he had better access, holding your ass for support. 

Only mere seconds later the amount of build up of pleasure made you hold your breath, at last with Aemond lapping faster over your clit with the tip of his tongue, you saw stars as you gasped for air, chanting Aemonds name like a prayer, gripping his silver locks holding him in place as he continued licking and sucking your clit through your orgasm. “Fuck- fuck!” You almost screamed, still gasping for air when he finally released his head from between your thighs. “Good girl, if only I could make you cum on my tongue every night.” He spoke when he rose from his knees, after he gently placed your leg back on the floor. His sultry voice made you open your eyes again and the mere sight of him- His lips, nose and chin- covered in your slick. “However, I’m not done with you yet my love.” He smiled and led you over to his bed to this time remove his own shirt and boots. 

As you laid back on the pillows, mind still woolly from your orgasm, you watched as he raised his shirt over his head. He was more slender than Aegon but more defined. He had toned abs and a strong but soft chest. Almost angelic. He didn’t have any hair, unlike Aegon, but you actually loved that. His arms were long and veiny just like his hands. His v-line was defined and let your eyes wander to the hard bulge in his pants. Yet he removed his boots instead and joined you on the bed. He laid next to you and traced your legs. Then he patted his thighs, silently asking you to sit on them. 

You did as he asked and moved over to sit on him, his thighs weren’t too thick but muscular and strong. Probably from all the training he did. His hands grabbed at your breasts again and he couldn’t help but mutter, “Fucking beautiful.” His hands then moved down your stomach right back to where you wanted him most. Letting his thumb move in circles over your clit again, you moaned at his touch. “I want you to do something for me.” He spoke. “Anything- anything for you.” You replied, breathlessly as he still let his thumb rub over your sensitive slick clit. “I want you to ride my fingers. And when I make you come with that, you’ll ride my face. Good and hard, understood?” You almost moaned again at his words. How did you get so lucky? Were the gods finally rewarding you for these horrible past few months? “Fuck- yes. I’ll- I’ll do anything you want.” You panted. 

He didn’t remove his thumb but let his middle finger once again glide between your folds to find your tight hole. This proved to be an easy task, you were still so wet from your previous orgasm that he easily slipped inside. Once he had his finger inside he added a second. He waited a bit for you to get used to the stretch before he gave you a smack on the ass again with his other hand. “Move darling, ride my fingers like you would my cock.” You gasped and almost immediately started moving against his hand, he made sure to curl his fingers in a way that they would hit exactly the right spot inside you every time you moved. The sensation of his fingers inside you while you grinded on his hand already felt amazing but of course he had to add his thumb again, wanting to make sure your clit wasn’t deprived of pleasure. 

This made you clench around his fingers, earning a groan from him. As you rode his fingers faster, chasing your high, his other hand moved from your ass to your face, grabbing your chin and sticking his thumb inside your mouth, you sucked on it instinctively. Moving the flat of your tongue against it. “That’s a good fucking girl, already knowing exactly what I want don’t you? Riding my fingers like you need them to survive. Fuck I can’t wait to fill you with my seed. See your swollen belly and know that I did that. Shit you don’t even know what you’re doing to me hāedar*.” His filthy words alongside his thumb rubbing over your clit made you once again see heaven itself but this time the feeling of your orgasm approaching felt different like something was about to burst. You wanted to tell him but with his thumb still in your mouth this proved difficult. Before you could stop it you grabbed his arm for support as you squirted all over his fingers and chest. “Gods- yes. Fucking cum for me. Cum all over my fucking fingers.” Aemond groaned out, he never thought he would see such a heavenly sight. This certainly did not help his own condition. But he did discover a new kink.

You rode out the last bit of your orgasm, finally allowed more air when Aemond removed his thumb from your mouth, rubbing his hand soothingly on your leg instead. When you had caught your breath you looked at the mess you made underneath him. “I- I tried to warn you- I’m sorry- I didn’t-” Before you could mutter out any more apologies Aemond cut you off. “Don’t ever apologise, that was fucking amazing. Making you feel such pleasure is all I ever wanted in life. So next you’ll do it on my tongue.” He wasted no time in grabbing your hips and moving you over his face, pressing you down on his mouth and his nose. You sighed and hoped you could handle another orgasm. Because he was clearly not finished with you yet. 

He stuck his tongue inside you and grabbed your hips once again to hold you down. Your body almost moved automatically, as if you no longer had control. You knew you weren’t going to last long this time, the sensitivity making sure of that. But what you didn’t expect was his beautiful nose hitting your clit just right as he tongue fucked you. He grunted and groaned at the taste, holding your hips to grind you on his face. “Aemond- Aemond please I need you- please fuck me- please!” You sobbed, it felt so fucking good, never in your life had you dreamed of such pleasure. Grinding and moving harder and faster on his face, your orgasm was approaching once again. 

And this time you hoped you would release all over him again as he so desperately wanted. Luckily your wish was granted. You felt the same full bladder like build up once again and leaned back to hold on to his torso for support. His nose hitting your sensitive puffy clit, his tongue fucking you deep inside and his own sounds of pleasure sent you over the edge. Warm liquid gushing over his face, the vibrations of his own moans and bucking of his hips in desperation, if you were to die now you wouldn’t care for it, you would die a happy woman. After making sure you were fully fucked out he released his grip and let you catch your breath. 

Your knees buckled from underneath you and your body fell limp on the bed next to him. And he had yet to fuck you with his cock. “Please Aemond I need your cock, I need your seed inside me, please, it’s all I ever wanted.” You pleaded, eyes still watery from overstimulation. “Don’t worry my love I plan on doing so, let me breed you good and proper, like you deserve.” He whispered against your neck. You hadn’t even noticed him moving on top of you. You heard rustling and opened your eyes to see Aemond at last removing his pants, releasing his hard cock. He was big and long, veins all over his shaft, his tip red and angry leaking with pre cum. When he threw his pants to the side he moved back to you, making sure you were okay he kissed you, soft and tender. You smiled against his lips as a confirmation. 

He kissed you once more on your forehead before grabbing his cock by the base, letting his tip move through your slick folds. Smearing his pre cum and your own spend around. He moaned at the warm and soft feeling. Aemond really had to remind himself not to immediately ram inside you and fuck you senseless, as much as he really wanted you. The last thing in the world he wanted was to hurt you. “Ready my love?” He asked. “Yes please, I want you to fuck me dumb...until I can’t even speak anymore.” You whispered, a smile on your face at the thought of finally having his cock buried inside you. “Trust me, I will.” He said before sliding in, letting out a loud moan as he did, slowly burying his cock inside, all the way until he could feel your cervix with his tip. 

After a couple of seconds he made sure he could move. He couldn’t hold back any longer and started rutting inside you like a dog in heat, panting and moaning as he did. This time moaning your name over and over again. You gripped his shoulders and back for support as the entire bed shook and banged against the wall. You both couldn’t give less of a fuck if someone heard. A tiny part inside you wanted to be caught, maybe you could finally be his. He leaned down and captured your own moans in his mouth, licking a stripe up your lips, catching your upper lip with it for a moment. You whimpered in response. The things you would do for this man. The sounds of your unholy moans and groans, your skin hitting his, the sound of his balls filled with seed slamming against you filled the room and probably the hall. “So fucking good- so fucking tight for me.” He moaned. 

“Please Aemond- I’m going to come- please fuck me harder!” You begged against his neck holding on to him tight before your pussy clenched around him, your fourth orgasm making you shake and curl your toes. Accidently scratching up his back in response. “You want my fucking seed princess? Want it inside you hm? I’m going to fill you to the fucking brim.” His own words and the feeling of your nails scratching his back sent him over the edge himself, burying his face in your neck, biting down on you as he delivered a final pump before indeed filling you to the brim with his seed. With a final couple of slow trusts to pump his seed good and deep inside you he released his grip on you. After having caught his breath he kissed you, and removed his softening cock so he could lay by your side. The sheets were covered in sweat and both of your cum as you could feel some of his seed dripping out of you. Aemond noticed and used his finger to push it back inside. “There, however, most of the time women don’t get pregnant after only one bedding. We should do it more often to ensure you become with child.” He whispered near your ear. You smiled, pulled his head back and kissed him.  

“We should, and when I do become with child, I can rest easy knowing they’ll be yours. Just as handsome and devoted as you.” You mumbled against his lips. He smiled at that, moved you on your side so he could have your back snug against him. You cuddled for as long as was possible, before you sadly had to retreat to your own chambers. Only a month later it was announced you were with child.

*hāedar = sister

[hangesfavles]

Nerd Hange headcanons

4.1k words. AFAB NB loser! hange x bimbo (ish)! fem reader. <3

Summary: Hange is more of a socially inept lesbian redditor gamer nerd rather than a normal ‘i’m smart’ dweeb :). These are general hcs of how you met loser/streamer Hange, things they like and relationship dynamics including you secretly eating them out on stream. <3

A/N: this is my first ever attempt at nsfw so i’m sorry if it’s bad or nondescript! also i know both of my fics so far have been for afab reader, but going forward i plan to write for a genny nootch reader just because i find it to be inclusive to wider groups of hange lovers <3 lol and last time i posted i said i never wrote fanfiction before but that was a tiny fib because i wrote shitty dumpster fire fanfics in middle school, but i’ve /srsly never tried my hand at nsfw before, but i guess there's a first for everything. pls critique me if u have any thoughts but be nice i’m sensitive. also shoutout to @abbyslev for helping me brainstorm <3 if ur reading my fanfics u probably already do, but pleaaaase follow her if u dont she’s lovely!!!! :3

Warnings: Nsfw content under my 2nd divider, sort of exhibitionism and masturbation. Not all of this is nsfw, but I’d still like for MINORS TO DNI. However, I know that you guys like to ignore those warnings, so I bolded the nsfw sections. At the very least, please don’t read the bolded hcs. Thank you & enjoy reading!

❥Loser! Hange who is in the same math course as you. When you walk in on the first day, you’re drawn to them, but not for the reasons you’d initially think. You were almost positive that they would be a decent person to cheat off of. I mean, they seem to look like they know what they’re doing, right?

❥Loser! Hange that can hear their pulse in their ears when they see a pretty girl take the spot beside them. They feel their heart rattling around in their chest as they sneak glances at you whenever they get the chance.

❥Loser! Hange quickly figures out the reason why you decided to sit next to them, rather than the other isolated chairs inside the lecture hall. But don’t worry, of course they’ll let you cheat off of them. Unfortunately, their performance starts to dip a little when they realize what you’re doing. They’re frequently under your gaze, and they can’t help it that you make them nervous :c 

❥Loser! Hange that is unaware that your eyes aren’t only looking down at their answers. One class when you were copying off of them, you started noticing the way their fingers hold their pencil. How slender their digits are, that their nails are surprisingly short, neat and cleaner than expected. You also started to notice how their veins protrude slightly and move up their arm... You feel yourself biting your lip as you observe their side profile. Their cheeks look soft and pink, similarly to their kissable lips. Your eyes continue to trail over their face: their thin, ovular glasses are slightly pushed down on their hooked nose, and their long eyelashes flutter as they continue to take notes beside you.

❥Loser! Hange can’t not listen to you getting called out by the professor when they notice you copying off of your seatmates’ assignments and notes. It was rather embarrassing, but you’re just happy the professor didn’t catch you cheating on an exam and risking academic misconduct.

❥Loser! Hange nudges your arm lightly after that incident, their voice low so you both don’t get caught by the professor. "Hey, um... I've noticed you've been using my notes and uh... answers. Do you need any help with the material? I mean, like, we could study together or something! If you want." They ask you with an excitement in their eyes and voice.

❥Loser! Hange can’t even feel proud of the fact they managed to talk to you because they barely even got that sentence out, and they couldn’t look you in the eye for more than 2 seconds. But it seems like all that is forgotten when you actually agree to meet up with them. They feel a rush of giddiness, but they try not to make a fool of themself in front of you. “Right! Yeah, so here’s my number... We can plan something, er- sometime.” They write their number down, sliding you the ripped end of their notebook page.

❥Loser! Hange who feels their heart in their throat as they lead you into their bedroom. The study session started off a bit rocky and awkwardly, but the tension in the air decreased as time continued on. As much as you would like to actually learn this material to earn good grades, you find yourself wanting to earn their attention much, much more. I mean, you obviously wore your lowest cut shirt and a pleated skirt for a reason. You look up at them, calling out for them. “Hey, Hange?” You ask, smiling as their head shoots up from their notes. “Can you explain this question to me?” You ask quietly, turning around your notebook to face them. You lean closer to them, purposely displaying your breasts for them to (hopefully) ogle.

❥Loser! Hange who starts to feel like they’re being tested by a higher power. They have to physically stop themself from glancing down and making a fool of themself. They try their best to focus on explaining the math problem to you as you watch their every movement like a hawk. You notice their eyes fall on your chest for a split second, and you pounce on your opportunity to tease them further. You reach up to their face, flicking their nose up so they’re forced to look at you. “My eyes are up here, silly.” “I- Uh- Sorry, just-” Hange trips over their words as they try to formulate a cohesive sentence on the spot. “Don’t worry about it, I’m just teasin’. It’s not so bad to be stared at if it's you.” You say with a playful wink.

❥Loser! Hange folds immediately. “O-Oh... Me? Really?” They ask, their eyes widening and pupils dilating. You can’t help but chuckle at their disbelief and nod your head in confirmation. “Yes, you. Is there anybody else in the room with us?” You joke. They stumble over their words as they think of a response. “W-Well, no, there isn’t, but- y’know- I didn’t think you-” They stutter, pushing the notebook aside and gesturing their hands between the two of you. They feel their cheeks growing warmer from embarrassment as they struggle to coherently voice their jumbled thoughts. “You know, you should at least take me to dinner before looking at me like that.” 

❥Loser! Hange doesn’t need to be told twice. They grab your hand with a cheesy smile, practically dragging you to their car while suggesting all sorts of restaurants that you might agree to. “Is there a certain restaurant you had in mind? We can try something totally different, like a little hole-in-the-wall joint. Ooh, but picture this: hibachi. The whole watching people cook in front of me thing usually makes me feel awkward but the food is always soooo good. Oh, or maybe we could go to a steakhouse! No matter what you choose, I’ll be fine with whatever! What do you think?" GOD they are just so excited and you find it utterly adorable. They remained true to their word and took you to whichever place you decided and paid for both of your meals. (They would have done this even if you didn’t joke about it bless their heart.) But then that first date turned into 2 dates, which quickly became 3, 4, 5, then suddenly you both forgot because anything the two of you do together is a date in your minds.

❥Loser! Hange definitely asks you out after only the second date. But in their defense, you’ve been hanging out after class as well as coming over to their house for “study sessions” that alway turned into watching tv or movies, ordering ubereats, going to the movies, walking around their neighborhood, anything but studying. You even took them to a party once. (You guys left after a half hour because Hange got overwhelmed, but you were still happy they tried something for you.) So by the time you guys went on your second “official date” they definitely felt confident that you would say yes.

❥Loser! Hange who loves talking to you about whatever game they’re playing. If it’s a story game, they’d love to explain anything you missed or don’t understand. They also would voice their predictions about how the game will end or where the story will go. If they see something predictable, they’ll definitely tell you what they think will happen, trying to impress you so when/if it does they’ll look “cool” to you. In reality though, you just find them to be geeky in the most endearing way. “Look, there’s a bunch of ammo in this room. If there’s a boss behind this door, you have to give me a kiss.” They say to you with a sly grin on their face. If it’s a PVP game, they will explain everything about what skills and powers each character has and who their favorite to play is. They’ll talk about what they like and dislike about the different mechanics, their favorite characters, parts they find tricky, etc. And of course, you sit there with a dopey smile while you listen to their rambling without interrupting, even if you don’t understand a word of what they’re saying because they’re just too cute when they’re passionately rambling. 

❥Loser! Hange who loves inviting you over, even if you two are doing absolutely nothing. They adore when you watch them play all sorts of video games. If they’re playing a console game, Hange lays next to you with your head against their shoulder, your arm splaying across their stomach while your hand rests around their waist. You tend to get pretty invested if the game is story based, insisting that they can’t play it without you around to watch the next part of the story unfold. If they’re playing a PC game, you’re sitting in their lap with a skirt that does absolutely nothing to cover your body once you’re seated on top of them. You prefer to face away from them, occasionally squirming in their lap so they can feel your ass pressed against their thighs and stomach. However, you do occasionally enjoy facing them, your arms wrapped around their shoulders as your legs hang off of their gaming chair at either side of their body.

❥Loser! Hange who also loves when you’re sitting in their lap, even if they struggle to focus on the game in front of them when your warm body is pressed against their own. It doesn’t help that they can smell the perfume coming from your neck, tempting them to lean in and kiss you there.

❥Loser! Hange that can’t resist the urge to rest their hands on your thighs during a cutscene, between rounds, during any sort of loading screen or when they’re respawning. They’ll use your thighs to push your ass back and closer to their body. 

❥Loser! Hange kisses your neck from behind, causing you to tilt your head and expose more of your neck for them to kiss. You let out a chuckle at how you effortlessly turned them on just by sitting on their lap and looking pretty.

❥Let’s just say... Loser! Hange finds the opportunity to quit or pause the game as soon as they can. When they eventually return to whatever game they were playing, they find it much easier to focus after you’re both satisfied. ♡

❥Loser! Hange who is also a small streamer! They probably get a few hundred people to watch them game each stream. They may not have a huge community, but their fans are consistent, funny, and always welcoming to new viewers! It’s a comforting little community. Because of this, Hange responds to their chat quite a bit and they’ve made quite a few friends with their mods and regular viewers.

❥Loser! Hange had to explain to you what streaming was. They decided that they would show you what it's like by doing a short stream while you silently watch them game and listen to them talk with their viewers.

❥Loser! Hange never technically introduced you to their fans. Not because they didn’t want to, they just knew that the internet wasn’t always kind, even if their fans are 99% supportive. They wouldn’t mention it much, but they are a little insecure about themself. They know that they treat you like an absolute princess, and they know that you adore them, that’s not the problem. The problem is that they don’t know if they’ll ever feel deserving of you. 

❥Loser! Hange only mentions this to you at late hours of the night when they feel vulnerable and slightly sleepy. You spend countless late nights at sleepovers holding them in your arms and reassuring them just how attractive you find them and that no one has treated you better. They start to feel reassured more once you mention to them that you don’t feel deserving of the endless love they give or of the many ways they spoil you.

anyway back to streamer hcs

❥Loser! Hange didn’t expect you to surprise them one day in their room with their favorite takeout in the middle of a stream. You didn’t know that they were streaming and you wanted to sneak up on them and scare them >:). You slip into their room as quietly as possible, slowly tiptoeing to their form slouched over their desk. Because of the slight delay of their videocam to their viewers, Hange doesn’t get the chance to read all of the different messages of the chatters who spotted your presence and are questioning about it. You silently place the bag of food on the floor, wrapping your arms around their shoulders and kissing their cheek roughly. 

❥Loser! Hange practically jumps out of their chair, yelping from the shock. They realize that it’s you pretty quickly, because no one else would hold or kiss them like that. They pause their game, swiveling around to face you with a wide smile. “Hi, baby!! What are you doin’ here?”

❥Loser! Hange immediately forgets the world around them, forgetting they’re literally live as they try to grab at your hips while they talk to you. “Mmmm,” You hum and giggle. “I just wanted to surprise you. It’s been a few days, I missed you.” You mumble before stepping back so that their hands disconnect from your waist. “Let me get some plates and napkins real quick.” You tell them before you leave the room again.

❥Loser! Hange remembers that they’re streaming, facing their viewers again to read what they missed from chat. “Chat, what do you mean ‘how did you bag a baddie?’” They say, reading some of the messages out loud. “‘How come Hange can get a girlfriend and I can’t? Life isn’t fair-’ WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” They cut themself off, their jaw dropping a little from the comments they read. The chat starts to go crazy after seeing you. Most of the messages are asking who you are, if Hange is dating you, or simply encouraging Hange to stream with you sometime officially. But of course, it’s much easier to take note of bad comments people say rather than nice ones.

❥Loser! Hange pouts when you return with plates in hand, ignoring their chat again in the blink of an eye. "I'm charming, right? and cute?” They look up at you with puppy eyes as you stand in front of them. “I'm desirable." They say those words like a statement, but it sounds like they’re trying to convince themself rather than state a fact. You hear the insecurities dripping from their tone. You promptly climb into their lap, placing a tender kiss to their cheek while your hand cups the opposite one. You progressively start kissing all over their face, and they close their eyes, giggling and getting lost in the moment. When you eventually begin moving down their neck, their eyes snap open as they remember the audience. "AAAAHHHH, I'M LIVE, I'M LIVE!" They warn you frantically, suddenly remembering again why they were a bit insecure in the first place. This causes you to jump a bit from their yelling. They swivel their chair around to face the monitor, looking at it from over your shoulder. "S-Sorry chat, ending stream a bit early today..." They say quickly, turning off their game and switching tabs to end their video. You chuckle, turning to face their camera. "Oops." you say only a few seconds before they end their stream. 

❥Loser! Hange decides that they might as well officially introduce you after that incident, since they know they’ll be getting teased for it for the next few streams.

❥Loser! Hange never thought that they would be in this situation with anyone, no less you. This exact scenario had been nothing but a fantasy in the corners of their mind. A fantasy that would fog up their mind in the late hours of the night, prompting them to slip their fingers under their boxers and lightly circle their clit with their fingertips, eventually slipping them inside of their warm body. Their back would arch up off of the bed, trying their best to picture that their own fingers were instead yours.

❥Loser! Hange that noticed a sort of glint in your eyes when they asked if it was okay to stream while the two of you were still hanging out. They hadn’t been active in the past handful of days because they’ve been spending all their time with you. They just can’t deny you, especially when you both want to spend all your time with the other.

❥Loser! Hange who has to resist the urge to drool as you carefully and quietly crawl under their desk, looking up at them through your long, mascara coated eyelashes as your knees hit the slightly dusty floor... 

❥You aren’t sure what came over you, but when you were watching them put their headphones on and start welcoming people into their stream, you missed the attention being on you. So decided to tease and torture them and force them to give you attention still. 

❥Loser! Hange is forced to pretend you aren’t under their desk and spreading their thighs and pulling down their boxers while giving them that signature sultry smile with your matching lustful look in your eye. You bite your lip as you part their legs, moving in closer to their folds. They can feel your hot breath on their legs as you kiss, lick, and bite the plush skin of their inner thighs. For a few moments, you feel their hand rest on top of your head and stroke your hair approvingly as you start to rile them up. They can feel their face heating up a little, but if anyone in chat mentions it they just explain that their AC isn’t working properly. Even from just your breath and kisses teasing their thighs, they can feel themself getting wet, the stickiness spreading around their groin.

❥Loser! Hange melts under your touches, but they quickly become needy and desperate for more. Their resolve is always weak when it comes to you, and your teasing will be the death of them. They’re trying so hard not to whine and plead because they have to act normal and play their game. Even when your tongue finally reaches out to meet their pussy, you keep teasing them. You give them as little as you possibly can, spreading their folds with the tip of your tongue, only occasionally flicking up to their clit. You also kiss their puffy pussy lips and their clit, showing how much you love them while simultaneously subjecting them to such sweet torture. When they feel your tongue finally giving them what they wanted, their legs start to twitch slightly from the stimulation. They try their best to regulate their breathing so nothing seems out of the ordinary.

❥Loser! Hange doesn’t know how to act when your mouth starts to move faster and faster between their legs. They’ve stopped looking at their chat entirely, just trying to focus on playing the game somewhat coherently and occasionally talking about it or making a random comment without stuttering or sighing from pleasure.

❥Loser! Hange’s pussy is dripping onto their chair from all of your teasing. The combination of your tongue and their pussy makes an audible squelch as you suck, kiss, and lick up their slit and their hips move slightly, trying to keep up with the rhythm of your tongue. At this point, they’re starting to feel the knot in their stomach tighten, and they’re struggling to hold back their sounds. “Chat, I’ve gotta use the bathroom real quick-” They say, closing their webcam and muting their mic as fast as their fingers let them.

❥Loser! Hange’s hand finds its way back to your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair and pushing you as close to them as biology allows. Their head falls back as they let out a shaky moan. “Ahhh.. F-Fuckk... Please, please more.” They whine, encouraging you to eat them out without fear. You can both feel how their pussy throbs with desire for attention. They’ve been impatiently craving this, so they plan to take full advantage of the fact you’re right where they want you. You pick up the pace, sloppily making out with their pussy and sucking their labia between your lips. They toss one of their legs up onto your shoulder, allowing you more access to them as the knot in their core is almost ready to release. You look up into their eyes, slurping up their juices. The way you look up at them with devotion makes them feel even better due to how much desire is in your expression, adding another layer of eroticism for them from your enjoyment.

❥Loser! Hange feels the tension in their lower stomach releasing. They sigh and moan out into the air lightly as they feel white hot pleasure take their entire mind and body. They arch themself off the chair, trying to meet your mouth even more than already possible. Their body grinds against your tongue as they shiver from the intensity of their orgasm.

❥Immediately after their orgasm subsides, loser! Hange pulls your head up by your hair, kissing you deeply and not caring that they can taste their sticky cum on your plump lips. Their free hand slides down to the back of your thigh, guiding your body to sit on their lap. Their hands are protective and possessive while you make out. They are such a softie, always wanting to cuddle, hug, and kiss after sex. They love you so much and need to let it show, it’s like a warm blanket of warmth and affection covers their heart. They see the world with rose colored glasses for an hour or two after you make them cum, honestly. 

❥Loser! Hange holds you for a little while, their face nuzzled against your neck as they whisper sweet nothings to you. They’ll pepper your neck, collarbones, and face with kisses while telling you how good you made them feel. “I- love- you- so- much- sweet- heart- thank- you-” They’d say between pecks to your skin, causing you to giggle from the slight tickle of their lips moving around your upper body. They only stop their barrage of kisses when you start to push at their shoulders playfully, begging them to stop. “I love youuuu!” They say in a drawn out tone, giving your body a tight squeeze. “But duty calls, so we'll have to continue this later. Don't worry, I'll be thinking about you the whole time!"

❥Loser! Hange loves aftercare, giving and receiving, basically. They’re happy as long as you’re physically close to them <//3.

❥Loser! Hange also used to have inappropriate thoughts about you before you two were officially dating. They knew it was a bit weird to do so without you having any knowledge of it, but they couldn’t help themself. The two of you had exchanged Instagrams after your very first study session and since then, they can’t help but fuck their fingers to your posts. They try to refrain from doing so each time; they attempt to scroll past your stories as if the sight of your face hadn’t already turned them on. Each time it always ends the same, inevitably retyping your name in the search bar to revisit the photo. At this point it had to be some sort of conditioning, the way their body would react to you like clockwork. But they still feel so embarrassed to be so obsessed with you simply because you gave them an ounce of attention.

❥Loser! Hange used to imagine you in all sorts of different positions for them. You name it, they’ve probably thought about it once or maybe even twice. Sometimes they would imagine you sitting on their face, other times they could imagine you under them as they would fuck their strap into you. When Hange feels extra desperate, they like to picture the ways you would take them, perhaps you would trap them against the bed, fingering their throbbing pussy while making out with them to ensure that they weren’t too loud. A favorite daydream of theirs surrounds the different types of faces you would make as they eat you out. They yearn to see how your eyes might look down at them, pleading for them to make you cum, or how they may be shut entirely, your lips parted to sigh out with pleasure from how good they’re making you feel. They’d wonder what kind of sounds you would make. Were you loud? Quiet? Shy? Breathy? Are you the type that moans, or are you the type that whimpers? These questions had plagued their mind until they finally had you for the first time after 4-5 dates. <3

i miss hange rip hange you would’ve loved being the most nerdy loser dork the geek world ever saw.

[slvt4buffw0men1111]

Assistance

Pt. 2, Pt. 1

It’s the next day and this time you actually arrived to work 10 minutes early. Thanks to not having another nasty dream. Walking in with 2 black coffees in your hand to give to your bosses as an apology to being late the prior day. 

“Goodmorning Y/n.” the voice startled you almost dropping the hot drinks. You look over to see Sevika sitting at leaning at the receptionist desk, almost like she was waiting for you.  

“Oh my go- Goodmorning Ms. Verma, you scared me.” you said composing yourself. 

She tried to hide her laugh but failed.

“What’s that?” she asked pointing to the beverages in your hands. 

“I brought you and Mr. Davies coffees as an apology for being late yesterday.”, you say walking around the desk and placing the coffees on the receptionist counter. Sevika’s eyes following you. 

“Well thank you Y/n, but Mr. Davies isn’t here today he’s in court for a client.”, she says picking up the coffee, the cup looks comically small in her hands. 

*So, it’s just you and me today* 

“I have some clients coming today they should be in schedule just let me know when they arrive.” 

“Yes of course.” 

“And you look nice today.” she says before walking into her office. You know you look nice, you may or may not have worn a lower cut top and some work pants that are little more snug around your thighs and ass. 

“Thank you…”, you quietly. 

10 hours of answering phones, making appointments, and calling back clients you finally done for the day. You gather your things and make your way to Sevika's office to let her know your heading out.  

You knock on her office door and wait for an ok to come in. 

“Ya come in.”, she grumbled. 

You open the door and see Sevika sitting at her chair with her hair a slight mess and her blazer off leaving her in thin whit button up with the first few buttons down giving you a good look at her collarbones. Her sleeves rolled up to her elbows and you see that her left arm is a prosthetic like Mr. Davies eye. It is a medical accident law firm so makes sense. 

“Yes Y/n, you sure do have staring problem dear.”, she said pulling her mechanical arm off the desk and under it. 

“Um sorry I'm heading out now.”, you say looking anywhere except at her.  

“Oh, ok thank you for work.”, she says looking back at what looks like a hundred papers. 

“Do you need me to stay? You look like you're drowning in papers.” 

“No I don't want to have you stay longer than you have too.” 

“It’s ok really I have no plans I can stay.”, you assure her. 

“Ok then your help would be appreciated thank you.”, You pull up chair next to her. Her body stiffens but you pretend not to notice. She smells like cinnamon and cigars. 

“Can you gather the papers that say L. Jenkins and M. Smiths on the top. I have a meeting with them tomorrow and need to get their case sorted.” 

“Yes ma’am.” you start to shuffle through the papers looking for the name she said. You both work in silence for about 45 minutes you think you got all the papers but you spot one more on Sevika's side of the desk. And instead of standing up and waking around the table like a smart person, you instead lean across the table putting your breast in her face. You don't notice until you feel her breath on your chest.  

“Oh my god I am so sorry I wasn’t thinking that was wildly inappropriate of me, I’m so sor-” 

“Relax y/n it's not the first time I've had breast in my face.”, she said a little too casually. 

Oh? 

 “Well, I'm still very sorry.”, you say pulling your top up more to try to cover your cleavage. You try to hid your face in your papers, but Sevika's see’s and just laughs at you. 

“Do I make you that nervous?”, she teases. 

“No” 

Yes. 

“You just intimidate me I don’t want you to think that I'm not cut out for the job.” 

“I can assure you are more than cut out.”, she says placing a hand on your forearm. 

“If you weren’t Mr. Davies would've fired you already.” 

“That’s good to know.”, you look at her. 

“So what made you interested in this job?”, she asked. 

“I just have a lot of experience as a receptionist and I went to school for legal studies, so here I am.” 

“I knew you were a smart girl.", she said leaning back in her chair looking at you. 

“Thank you, ma'am, what about you? Why are you in Law?”, you reciprocated. 

“Long story short I got into a pretty bad accident when I was firefighter years and they didn’t want to pay for my medical bills so I became a lawyer so I could sue their ass and help others get the justice they deserve.” 

“Is that how you lost your arm?”, you blurted out without thinking, which caught her a little of guard. 

“Um yea, I didn’t think you’d notice.” 

*It’s kinda hard not too* 

“I think it's cool and unique like some kind of superhero”, you joke to break the awkward tension. 

“Ya you think so? Maybe I should start showing it off more.” 

“It wouldn’t hurt too.”, you respond as you get back to working on the papers. 

She just stared at you in awe. She doesn't usually get the best reactions when people find out she has a prosthetic, especially from the women she’s interested in. It's been a big insecurity of her and you just seemed to wash it away within minutes.  

You work for next hour and a half in silence only asking her occasional questions about the paper work. By 7pm you both are done. She waits for you to gather your things before leaving the building and locking up.  

“Let me walk you to your car.” 

“Oh, you don’t have to it’s just one block down.”, you lied it was actually 4 but you didn’t want to inconvenience her.  

“I’m walking you to your whether you want me too or not.”, she said. 

“Fine be my guest.”, you said before walking. 

You engage in some light conversation about the clients she has tomorrow before you knew it you were at your car. Conversation seems to flow with her. 

“This was more than one block.” ,she said 3 blocks in. 

“I know I just didn’t want to inconvenience you. ” 

“You could never inconvenience me, but Mr. Davies on the other hand.”  

“Ya my presence seem to inconvenience him.” you half joked. 

“He’ll warm up to you, your too sweet not to like.”, she said. Your face heats up and you make it to your car before you could think of anything to say. Thank God. 

“Well thank you for walking me Ms. Verma.” 

“You can call me Sevika.” 

“Thank you Sevika” you smile up at her before getting into your drivers seat. 

“Wait can I ask you a question?”, she asked her mechanical hand stopping your car door from closing all the way. 

“Ya of course Sevika.” 

“So, I have this banquet this Saturday and Silco is bringing his wife and I have no one to bring so I was wondering if you wanted to be my plus one?”, she asked you nervously. It was cute, you've never seen her this nervous before.  

“I would love to!”, you reply. 

“Perfect, let me get your number so I can send you details about it.”, she really could’ve just emailed you but she just really wanted your number. 

She hands you her phone and you put it in and save your contact. 

“Thank you, y/n, I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“See you tomorrow Sevika.”, she shuts your car door for you and watches you drive off before heading back towards her car. She looks down at her phone and see your contact saved as “y/n: )”. 

You're gonna get her in trouble. 

Smut in next part!!! 

[velvet-paradox]

Secured (Part One)

Fandom: Call of Duty Pairing: König x Female reader Summary: wanting a little slower pace in his military career, König takes a calmer, desk job while he recovers. After a bit of a mix up on shifts, König is now in charge of what comes next. (I've been watching The Night Agent and got inspired!) Length: Medium Warnings: explicit content, strong language, eventual NSFW. ENJOY!

König had fully intended to listen to his mother's concerns the last time he visited her cozy little cottage on the hillside. Tended-to garden, trimmed up grass from the helpful lads that lived just down the road. He'd been injured, shot in the shoulder where conditioned muscle met bone, got treated and sent home with strict orders to take it easy.

Relax.

Live a little.

And he did just that.

Enjoying his time with is mother, resurfacing memories of when he was a boy, less scarred and jovial then the man posted up on her afghan covered couch. Physical therapy was bitch, even a pint couldn't stoke off the fire that burned into his joints.

He was also enjoying homecooked meals and not the usual mess hall offerings or freeze dried lumps they'd slap tantalizing names on the plain, brown packaging, as the stuff inside were actually up to snuff.

Ja right!

"You ought to settle down now , König. You have been fighting for most of your life, you should be living, traveling and seeing the world with the love of your life under arm. Don't you want that?"

Of course he did.

Most of his life were acts of service, finished deeds, quotas. Filling out paperwork, signing classified documents, pursuing the worst of the worst, taking down targets, letting his life on the actual line for the greater good.

Did a certain foreign dictator need to be 'rescued' from their senate floor and taken to an undisclosed location and threated, beaten and broken for an extended amount of time until intel was finally given through broken teeth and a bloody jaw? Perhaps.

Was a 'missing' senator maybe not so missing after all under the clutches of the Austrian and with good reason, added sex trafficking was highly frowned upon and under his high ranking position too? Not on his watch.

Yes blood was on his hands, in his hair, in his mouth but those same hands wanted to also be washed clean, to hold another, to touch another.

Sometimes he'd feel unworthy, all these acts, all these years in the military formed the man laying in his bed, the same four walls that molded him, crafted him like clay. That maybe all his hard work wasn't worth all the damage. His shoulder screamed when rubbed his hands over his face.

….

"How she doin'?" Sebastian Krueger asked the following morning, sipping tea from one his mothers' glass cabinets, sitting across from König at a little table and chair set behind the cottage. He'd already eaten two biscuits was not so subtly eyeing the third one of the decorative plate.

"Mother is well, she'll be back from the market soon. You should stay for dinner, I have half a mind that she is trying to fatten me up like some Christmas goose!"

"You know I wasn't going to say any-"

"Then don't!"

Krueger chuckled and broke off half the biscuit instead.

"She must be happy to have you home for a bit, not off on field duty."

"A little too happy," König took a long, hot sip, savoring the honey on his tongue. "She thinks I should settle down, find a partner, live life while I still can."

"Is she wrong?"

"Nein. I want those things as well, Seb. I just don't know where to start! I've been on deployment after deployment, cots, and safe houses since I was seventeen. How do I talk to a woman about a life like that? One isn't going to just fall into my lap, you know?"

"I could set you up with someone if you like?"

"Yeah right," König snorted and finished his tea. "I'm not taking fucking dating advice from you."

"Why not?" Krueger eyed him, expression laden all the way up to his hairline.

"Because smart pants, you don't know any women to set me up with!"

Krueger pondered his words, eyes narrow, mouth opening and closing, lost in thought he just grunted and finished off the rest of that biscuit in defeat.

"It is smarty pants by the way!"

König heard Sebastian shout as he made his way through the threshold of the open back door to refill their cups.

….

Four months.

Four months of softly changing his sheets, helping his mother about the house, going for runs through the jagged hills, splashing his face with fresh creek water, chewing on wild growing ramps. Bringing back little rocks to add to his mother under-window flower beds, he'd done so since he was a knee high boy. She had saved them all of course.

He was starting to lose his mind, the pain meds his doktor had prescribed sat half full on the nightstand, he took them as needed but for the most part he punished himself, testing his own pain tolerance as means of an endurance challenge of sorts. He needed to do something, anything, to get out of the house.

Sebastian suggested he come back to work, take a desk job, fill out reports, that sort of thing to make his life a little more interesting until he was medically cleared for field operations.

"I know of another type of job, real laid back, you don't have to do too much physically." Kruger had mentioned one sunny, yet cold afternoon.

"Like what?"

"Ever heard of Night Division?"

"Nein, I have not." König had answered, a query on his mask covered face. Sounded interesting.

"There is a reason for that, it is a top secret op, need to know basis," Krueger pulled him in close on their walk through the base, stopping by the archway that lead to the rec room. "If you want in, let me know, I'll get you clearance and I'll walk you through it. If not; not harm, no foul."

König considered it, contemplated it for the rest of the day. He was feeling a bit down, his shoulder throbbed something fucking fierce every fours or so, letting him know he was still in the healing stages, still on the mend. But a cushy little desk job, keep him occupied, maybe he could get caught up on a few books he'd started and had to put down or leave behind, relax at a desk like he had when he first started out after basic. He could do something like that.

Sebastian was right; this job would keep dinner on the table and the lights on. It was simple enough as well, answer the phone when it rang and flashed burnt orange (according to Krueger this phone hadn't actually rung in two months). Monitor the actions, pay attention to the caller in need of assistance, ask the appropriate questions in order to render aid.

König brought a thermos and a water bottle full of ice. He was afforded a notepad and pen, a binder in the top right drawer of a silver desk, the left held a rolodex of people who might be calling in need.

He'd been at it for two weeks now, no phone calls, caught up on three books already as he reclined back in the softest office chair he's ever sat his behind in. Ankles locked, boots on the table reading, belly full. Then it happened.

The phone rang, a shrill sound that damn near rocked him right out of that chair! His book fell to the floor, loosing his page instantly. The orange flashed urgently as König scrambled to get out his notebook to take notes and location, the binder that held random question whoever was on Night Division duties to ask to make sure they were truly talking to who they were supposed to. The phone number as Krueger had told him was only given out to military, not a simple phone number one might find scribbled on a folded up post-it or bar napkin.

König cleared his throat and picked up the receiver, holding it tightly to his ear.

"Hallo, what is the color of the day?" König asked, clicked pen at the ready and pressed onto the first page.

"What? I don't know! I need help." A frantic woman hushed her voice into the phone, he could some shuffling and light grunting.

"Ma'am, I need the color of the day before I can assist you."

"I don't fucking know! Please help me." The woman gasped and he could hear something close.

"Miss this is a very secure line-"

"I know that. Night Division, right? My brother said if anything suspicious happened while he was deployed, I should call this number immediately. Which is what I am doing!"

"Without the color, miss-"

"Please, sir. There's two people breaking into the house, their looking for something. I don't want them to find me. There's a crawl space in my brothers' closet, that's where I am." The woman rasped, panic in her voice made König uneasy, things could get messy fast, he knew that first hand.

"I do not know your location."

"There's a rolodex in the top left drawer of your desk, my brothers' name and address are in there. And hurry!" She growled lowly.

"Name?"

"[REDACTED]."

"I'll send over someone."

"What? You're not coming?" The woman almost sounded offended, as if he had stood her up on a date or backed out of a last minute party.

"This is my station, miss. I can't leave my post, another call might come through."

The pregnant pause made him even more uneasy, as he wrote down the boyfriend's name and address with three scratches of his pen below it.

"I don't want to die like this." The woman exclaimed with a sniffle.

….

Much to König's surprise when he told his supervisors that a phone call had come in, he didn't realize that meant he was the one to answer it meant that in the very sense. Another selected Night Division advocate would take his place.

They handed him a standard service weapon, shoved a bullet proof vest to his bulky chest and sent out on his way. He even got to pick which company car from the lot. The SUV handled beautifully, the screen on the dash showing the coordinates to the Division caller. He cut the lights as he turned down the block, a quiet, wet residential street. Most of the cars were put away in their garages, all but one.

König memorized the plate, just in case things got hairy.

He could see movement in the house, shadows dancing in the low light. He narrowed his eyes, and softly exited the vehicle, approaching the house like the thieves already inside. König maneuvered around the back of the house, rolling his bad shoulder before kicking open the back door. He could hear muffled voices from inside, startled footsteps, a new magazine is put into a weapon that stands no chance against the man advancing in the darkness, especially when he flips down his night vision goggles.

"Whoever the hell you are, you owe me a new door asshole!" A raspy man calls in the dark.

"Sorry. Are you [REDEACTED]?" König asked, already knowing the answer.

"Who?"

"Didn't think so!"

König held his gun steady as rain, aimed true at one of the intruders. The man before him was crouched and steadily raising to his feet in the foyer, hands up.

"Do not do anything stupid, well more stupid than breaking into someone's house."

"Easy big guy, [REDACTED] is my brother, he asked me to check on the place while he's on vacation."

"Vacation, ja? Where to?"

"Uh Spain I believe he said." The man mumbled something.

"Then why are you in the dark? Go ahead and turn the lights." König suggested.

The man reacted by reaching behind him and swiftly pulled out a blade, the metal glinting in the darkness.

Big mistake.

Though König is on the larger scale in terms of height and weight, he is quite agile, a superb trait and bonus to his career. The blade came right at him but was easily slapped away by his gloved hand, the man reached back for another but ever the observant Austrian, he located the light switch panel next to him, flipped up his goggles and whacked the room into brightness, exposing everyone to the white hot lights. A woman tried to bum rush him and failed as she made a distressing sound when she hit the floor, her loosely held gun skidded away.

The second attempt at throwing a blade stuck to the wall beside him, König ripped it out of the dry wall and threw it back at the man in the foyer, landing perfecting in the shoulder. The man wailed out in pain, the woman scrambled for the gun only to slide it further out of reach.

König pointed his gun and undid the safety.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," the woman looked up at his towering frame, her head jerked slightly and she slowly put her hands up. "Get your little friend and leave, you wish to wake up tomorrow do you not?"

They left without a fuss while König cleared the rest of the house. Not too much damage, the office behind the French doors was a mess though and going to be a bitch to put back in order but that wasn't his problem.

"Miss?" König called out after finishing his sweep of the first floor.

"Miss you can come out now. We talked on the phone. Night Division. You're safe now."

As he made his way up the staircase, lined with paintings of landscapes and bodies of water, the door to his immediate right swung open and the woman appeared.

"Oh!" She was startled, no doubt by his mask and head coverings, by the way he was steadily putting away his service weapon. His size in comparison to hers.

Her eyes went wide and she slightly hugged the doorframe, a baseball bat in hand. Her expression ranged from frightened, to skeptical, to calm in an ease of seconds.

"I didn't mean to startle you." König apologized.

"It's not.. sorry. You're who I spoke with. Are there more of you?" She asked peering around him, or at least what she could, clutching her cellphone and bat.

"Just me I'm afraid."

"Oh. Did you kill them?"

"Maimed."

"Good. I don't think there's enough peroxide to clean that up."

"You've cleaned up blood before?"

"You do see that I'm a woman, right? I've been cleaning up blood since I was twelve." The woman cocked her head to the side with a snort and dropped the bat down to her side.

König got the OK to clear the rest of the second floor, just in case. All was well and he followed her down the stairs, pointing out the mess the intruders had made of the office.

"You mentioned they were looking for something. Did you hear what exactly?" He asked from the doorway, watching her side steps and tip toe about the space, moving a crooked lamp, picking up a few pillows from a small futon in the corner, a woven blanket.

"Something called Eden. Does that mean anything to you?" The woman asked, putting her brothers' things back in order. The sound of shuffling papers being neatly stacked once more made for a delightful background noise.

"No but I'll look into it. You should get ready."

"You certainly cannot stay here, miss. Those two dirt bags might come back with more firepower and back up. Nein nein, you shall come with me to a safe house after a debriefing at the base." König explained, watching her face rise and fall with understanding that the man before her was right. "My superiors will want to know what you have told me."

"Oh. Yeah. Right."

König waited patiently in the office, looking at childhood photos of the woman who was pounding the floor upstairs, gathering some belongings. Her brother's Marine portrait, certificates of accomplishments and replica swords lined the wall behind the wood stained desk.

She knocked on the side of the office doorframe soon after, giving him a thumbs up.

….

"You said Eden, correct?" Kim Hong-jin or another masked man by the codename Horangi sat down with König and his charge. He was used to the cold conference room, the woman beside him, shivering and rubbing her hands before sitting upon them, did not.

Mid conversation, König shouldered off his jacket and draped it over his shoulders, dwarfing her in size. She gave him a nervous smile before continuing.

"Did they mean to hurt you, the duo?"

"I don't know. They just broken in through the side door, my brother, [REDACTED] has three entrances to his place, I got a Ring notification and hid. I'd never seen them before but they were adamant that my brother had something they wanted."

"Hmmm. We'll look into it, see what rocks we can over turn," Horangi scribbled down some information, circling a few keywords from your statement. "König; take her to the old farmhouse on 84th, hasn't been used in a beat, could use a tune up. Keep yourselves occupied until further notice." Horangi shook the woman's hand before gathering up the folder and notes. "Oh and König?"

"Ja?"

"Don't let her out of your sight."

The ride to the farmhouse was a bumpy one, the cabin of the SUV jostled the pair around, rocks and pebbles no doubt threatening with good merit to get lodged into the tread of the tires. The crooked place came into view from just the headlights, on bright of course, started to appear along the empty dirt road. There wasn't a neighbor for miles König and his partner noticed once they took their exit ramp from the highway, making sure they weren't being followed.

He held the door open for her, taking the duffel bag from her lap, flipping it over his shoulder like an afterthought.

"I never did get your name," the woman said, walking up the rocky driveway to the creaking porch as König took out the keys Horangi had given him on their way out from base. "Suppose I ought to know who I'm being shacked up with."

König snorted and put the key into the lock. "You can call me König ." "Hmm, nice ring to it if you ask me." She said, fumbling along the wall until the lights came on, showering the cozy house in a nice warm glow.

"And you are, miss?" He asked and placed her bag down on a stiff looking couch.

She spun on her heel and held out her hand in salutations. "I'm Y/N."

Even in the country light and glow of the almost yellow/orange lighting, you looked great. Not that he thought you looked bad; at all. He realized you were incredibly attractive the moment you popped out of your brothers' room, weapon and phone in hand. Hair mussed, face contorted with relief at his presence, stroking his ego.

You looked around, checking the rotary phone on a polished side table. Lifting the pewter Eiffel Tower, the fake flowers were dusty and the place reeked of mothballs.

The kitchen was decent, a little round table with a cheap plastic table cloth, four chairs with matching tied cushions.

"Not too bad," you announced after rummaging through the empty fridge. "I could live here."

"How long do you reckon we shall be out in the sticks?" König asked, more so out loud to himself than to you.

"Who knows. We'll need to go to the store in the morning, fuck all is in this place. Not even a water pitcher!"

"We will just have to take it day by day, I'm scared."

You snorted. "You're scared? You. All what? eight fuckin' miles of you. You're scared."

"I mean uh… I'm afraid. You'll forgive me, I tangle my words sometimes."

"Clearly! We should check out the rooms, I call first dibs!" You shouted, brushing past him like a child or wobbly infant, thundering your footsteps to the second floor. He could hear you exclaiming up there, bouncing on one squeaking bed in favor of the other as he locked up the house.

"Found mine, fend for yourself big guy."

He took the third room, at the top of the landing, it's bedspread reminding him of sweet grass summers. He laid there for awhile on top of the covers, telling you to keep your door open just in case. He could hear you snoring lightly, could picture the rise and fall of your breaths, timing them on his watch before he crept down the stairs, taking sudden notice that the fourth stair from the bottom creaked at just the right spot to the right.

He propped himself into an armchair by the sheer curtain covered window by the door.

Ever cautious.

Hyper aware.

He knew he wouldn't sleep and had planned on being awake as soon as Horangi sent you on your way from base.

He didn't mind.

He was being useful which filled his head with light, happy thoughts.

[milkteabinniechan]

♡stoned love - jeongin

MINORS DNI 18+ ONLY commissions/m.list

pairing: college student jeongin x afab reader

warnings: marijuana use, some angst, fingering

a/n: this is thanks in part to @simply-trash5 and how much she inspired me to write my first jeongin fic! I hope y'all like it :)

Jeongin held the lighter to your mouth, the unlit joint dangling from your lips.

"breathe in." He whispered. His thumb flicked the metal wheel of the lighter. Gas ignited and fire filled the bleached white paper.

You inhaled deeply, perhaps too deeply, and held your breath for a few seconds. You glanced at Jeongin who seemed to be mouthing the seconds; two, three four...

You exhale, your chest deflating dramatically. Your eyes start to water as you feel a warm burn building from your lungs. Bees started to buzz in your brain and empty, echoing fashion. What if you passed out? Jeongin would think you are so stupid if you pass out. Don't. Pass. Out.

Jeongin lifts himself off the bed and moves in closer to you.

"You doing okay, ace? That was a big hit." His cocky smirk was undeniable.

He had started called you ace when you scored highest in your class and made all the other students hate you. But Jeongin didn't hate you. He loved how smart you were. He just smiled and called you Ace.

You nodded your head and tried with all your might not to cough. No one had ever asked you to get high in highschool. And now you were in your last year of college, finally smoking a joint. You wanted to look cool, like you knew what you were doing. But the burning and tingling in your lungs was threatening to expose you for the inexperienced bookwork you really were.

"It's okay to cough, ace. It actually gets you higher. Just let it out." Jeongin's cocky smile turned to a genuine one. His hand landed softly on your back, rubbing up and down.

You eventually let your chest cough headily and a full laugh followed suit. You both laughed so hard you could feel your entire body start to lift up and off the bed. You were above your body now, watching yourself laugh silly. Your body flipped and flew through the ceiling until fluffy clouds welcomed you to your new home in the sky.

"Good shit, huh?" Jeongin's voice echoed through your clouded kingdom and skyrocketed you back down to your dorm room. You blinked rapidly to gather yourself back to your surroundings.

You sluggishly turned your head towards him to agree. But all you could think was he's so hot, God he's so hot, so HOT. You had had a crush on Jeongin for a few months now. Watching him lean back in his chair during class, closing his eyes and daydreaming about anything else besides the lecture in front of him. He was so effortlessly cool. So effortlessly charming. So effortlessly HOT.

Something in your brain was screaming NOW OR NEVER while your face leaned closer to his. By the time Jeongin realized what was happening, your lips had found his in a clumsy but affectionate display. His eyes widened at your bold first move. You had always been so shy and quiet towards him. He had absolutely no idea you could be so-

His lips were warm against your own. Your eyes fluttered back as you willed yourself not to come undone so easily. Jeongin took the lead and pressed his face harder into yours. His teeth grazed your bottom lip and bit down softly, sending a tinge of pain through your body. He pulled back and watched your face. But the empty space left between you was unbearable. You couldn't hold back anymore as you felt an untamed beast starting to show itself. You threw your body on top of Jeongin and continued the kiss that had so cruelly ended a moment before.

Your sudden thrust on top of him caused Jeongin's cock to swell and grow uncomfortable in his jeans. He pressed his hips into yours for release from the building pressure. Your hips moved against his groin at a seductive pace. The feeling of his bulge against your clothed cunt was almost enough to bring you to climax. Selfishly you continued to grind into him.

"Tell me what you want, ace." Jeongin growled into your open mouth.

"Mm-want to come..." You whimpered. You had never said that before. Not out loud. You had had boyfriends before this, but you had never said out loud what you wanted. Was it the weed? Was it Jeongin? You only knew one thing for certain, you couldn't ignore this orgasm. You needed it. Now.

Jeongin chuckled softly at the desperation in your sweet voice. His cock now tripled in size and threatening to burst the zipper of his jeans. He slid one hand lovingly down the front of your pants. His long fingers gingerly inching towards your slick folds. Your clit was already prodding out and begging for contact. Jeongin's fingers swirled light circles around the wet bundle of nerves. Your stomach tightened as his fingers leisurely moved in and out from inside of you, innocently pushing through your hole bit by bit, inch by inch. You were so tight and pulling in his fingers with every thrust of your hips.

Jeongin's fingers were coated with your delicious juices now. Your cunt had flowered and bloomed for him and his middle finger had made his way inside and curved up towards your spongey walls. You felt heavenly and he couldn't help but imagine how effortlessly you would swallow up his rigid length.

"Gonna cum!" You muffled into the crook of Jeongin's neck. Your body had fallen limp on top of his. His muscular chest the only thing supporting you as you fell deeper into a Nirvanic ecstasy. Your orgasm was so close you worried you might break before you reached it.

Your hips bucked one finally time as your hands reached for something to hold onto, something to ground you. Pleasure poured out of you in coarsing, ferocious waves. Jeongin held his hand over your core while you caught your breath. He meditated in the warmth of your body. Both of your chests rising and falling in unison.

"You're full of surprises, ace."

taglist: @simply-trash5 @sugawhaaa @trixiekaulitz @chrizzztopherbang @cassidymb121 @roanns-posts @staysinbloom @yaorzu-blog @bubblebisk @cotton-candycloudz @domicaru @doohnut @strawberry31 @slxtmeri @newhope8 @tinyelfperson @dandelions-143 @stayyyyyyyyyyyy21 @msauthor @fun-fanfics

[imogen-rhitt]

Where: Theo's Apartment Who: @theoxkent

Her shoes weren’t even actual shoes, they were just the weird kind of half decent slide on slippers that fancy hotels provided to all their guests, but Imogen didn’t notice. She’d just shoved her feet in the first thing she saw, having the smarts to grab a cardigan from the back of a chair even through her haze of impulsive action. Phone still clutched in her left hand she didn’t even think to bring her room key with her as she raced out into the hotel corridor. Moving swiftly down the fire stairs because the elevator would just be too slow, she didn’t want to stand there and wait for it, she didn’t want that moment to stop and be with her own thoughts because it ran the risk of her changing her mind. Imogen couldn’t change her mind - she knew what had to be done as she burst out onto the street int the cold night air, much in the confusion of the doorman who hadn’t been expecting that at two in the morning. “Good Evening, Miss Rhitt.” He greeted her politely, but she didn’t even notice just flagging down the first taxi she saw coming towards her. 

The conversation with Theo had been a million times easier when there was a phone between the two of them, neither could see the other’s face, like a barrier to negate the aspects of their new lives so they could instead connect how they used to. Be who they’d been back in London before Imogen fucked everything up. She’d found herself unable to stop the grin that was playing on her lips as she’d laid in her hotel room bed reading the dumb replies Theo had sent back to her equally stupid texts, but it had been the photo of her ex laying in their bed not far across the town that had been the final straw. Coupled with them so easily playing into her madness which is something her fiancee had never done - instead accusing her of being childish when she behaved like…well a child. Even in jest. It had always made her feel like she was being told off, but Theo didn’t do that. Five years had gone past and they still embraced Imogen for the little weirdo she truly was underneath the thirty year old exterior. 

As the taxi pulled up in front of Theo’s building she distractedly tapped her phone against the card reader - thank god for Apple Pay - without even looking at the total. Right now she couldn’t have cared if it was three hundred bucks she’d have paid it without a second thought. Her memory of the night they’d been back to Theo’s place after she’d shown up at the restaurant was a little hazy but as she pushed into the building it all started flooding back as she saw the familiar surroundings. Breathless by the time she got to their door with both exertion and adrenaline the brunette knocked loudly a few times, standing there like a deer in the headlights preying the knock would be heard, and door would be opened. That Theo wouldn’t look through their peephole and tell her to go away through it. Blinking at them silently when the door did finally swing open to reveal her ex on the other side.  

[luvzshy]

Okay this involves actor Billie

What if she is secretly dating a cast member (reader gf) and at the interview (press for the movie) they are asked questions about their relationships and they answer describing each other but not enough to know it’s each other, but based on their body language and eye contact and the way they admire one another the fans start putting it together online. Billie and gf fuel the fire later that day when gf posts a pic wearing Billie’s sweatshirt.

Or something along those lines. Ik I made it super specific🤣

Silent Signals

The press junket was in full swing, the room buzzing with anticipation. You sat next to Billie on the interview panel, both of you well aware of the rumors swirling around you two for weeks. Being cast together in this major film had sparked endless speculations—about your chemistry, your close friendship, and what exactly was going on behind the scenes. But up until now, both of you had kept things professional, playing the part of co-stars perfectly. No one knew you were more than that.

You stole a quick glance at Billie from your seat, her hands casually resting on her lap, fingers drumming softly against her thigh. She caught your gaze and gave you the smallest of smiles, a private look only you would recognize. It was enough to make your heart race, but you quickly looked away, hoping no one noticed the exchange.

The interviewer smiled, leaning forward. “So, Billie, we have to ask… fans are dying to know—are you seeing anyone?”

Billie straightened up in her chair, her eyes twinkling with amusement. You could see the corner of her mouth lift in that mischievous grin she always wore when she was about to play things close to the chest. “Yeah, actually, I am,” she answered smoothly, and the room seemed to hold its breath. “She’s… incredible. Smart, talented, everything you could want.”

You couldn’t help but smirk a little, trying to hide your reaction from the cameras pointed at you. Of course, she wouldn’t give too much away. Billie was good at this, teasing just enough to keep people on the edge but never revealing the full picture.

The interviewer wasn’t satisfied with that. “Interesting… and how did you meet her? On set, maybe?” There was a laugh in her voice, like she was fishing for something specific, knowing there was more to uncover.

Billie shook her head, still smiling. “Well, I can’t say too much. But she’s someone who understands me, you know? It’s been… really good.”

Your chest fluttered at the words, knowing exactly what she meant by ‘understanding her.’ It was something only the two of you shared, in quiet moments away from the spotlight, tucked in her trailer or late at night in your shared hotel room.

Before the interviewer could press further, she turned her attention to you. “What about you? There’s a lot of curiosity around your love life too. Anyone special?”

Your mind raced, but you kept your expression calm. “Yeah, there is.” You hesitated, feeling Billie’s eyes on you. “She’s… kind of everything. Really supportive, keeps me grounded when things get crazy.”

There was a brief pause, the interviewer raising her eyebrows, clearly intrigued by the vague yet intimate answers. “Seems like both of you are very happy in your relationships. Must be nice to have someone who gets what you’re going through.”

“Yeah, it is,” you both echoed at the same time, and you had to fight the smile threatening to break out on your face.

The rest of the interview moved on to typical press talk—questions about the movie, working with the cast, and upcoming projects. But the subtle exchanges between you and Billie weren’t lost on the fans. As soon as the interview clip hit social media, they were quick to pick up on the shared glances, the way Billie’s eyes lingered on you whenever you spoke, and how your body language seemed to mirror hers without even realizing it.

“Did you see the way Billie was looking at her???” one fan tweeted, attaching a zoomed-in photo of Billie watching you, her expression soft and adoring.

“Them answering the relationship question like it’s not super obvious they’re talking about each other 😭” another wrote, attaching a gif of the two of you laughing together.

By the time the press junket ended, the internet was buzzing with theories. Billie’s name was trending, as was yours, and the hashtag #BillieGF started gaining traction as fans began dissecting every interview and behind-the-scenes clip for more clues.

That night, as you both relaxed in the hotel room, you were scrolling through Twitter, laughing at how fast fans had put the pieces together. Billie was stretched out next to you on the bed, wearing her usual oversized hoodie—the one that always looked comically big on her but felt perfect when you wore it.

“Think they’ve figured it out?” she teased, glancing at your phone.

“Maybe,” you replied, showing her a particularly convincing thread where fans had matched your hoodie to the one she was wearing in old Instagram photos. “I think this might have given us away.”

She snorted, shaking her head in disbelief. “They’re too good.”

Feeling a little bold, you leaned over and snapped a selfie of yourself in the hoodie, making sure to catch the recognizable logo on the front. You posted it on your Instagram with the caption, “Comfy after a long day ❤️”.

The photo was barely up for an hour when fans started freaking out, sharing side-by-side comparisons of you in Billie’s hoodie and Billie wearing the same one in a throwback picture.

“GUYS SHE’S WEARING BILLIE’S HOODIE!!!”

“They’re definitely together omg 😭”

By morning, the internet was on fire. Fan accounts were dedicated to piecing together every subtle hint you and Billie had ever dropped about your relationship. And, of course, Billie couldn’t resist fueling the flames. She commented on your post, “Looking good in my favorite sweatshirt 😏”, making it all but official.

[nethhiri]

Slipping and Falling

Security Guard! Zoro x Mermaid! Reader

One Shot - Modern AU

Warnings: none

I'm really proud of this one and I think it's so stupidly cute <3

The only thing worse than a mall cop was a nighttime security guard, even worse: a nighttime security guard at an aquarium. Not even a museum. Zoro had been the daytime security guard until he dozed off one too many times, then he was demoted. His boss, Mihawk, said that if he couldn't wake up for the day shift, maybe he was more suited for the night shift. He didn't say it was a demotion, but Zoro wasn't an idiot. This was probably his last chance before they canned him.

He breezed through the doors, already 5 minutes late. He threw open the door to the small security office, apologizing and straightening his uniform. "Sorry. My stupid roommate baked my keys into a loaf of bread again." 

"That's either the weakest excuse you've had yet, or your roommate hates you." King already had his jacket on, ready to leave.

"The second one. Please don't tell Mihawk I was late." Zoro threw down some rice balls and chips from the convenience store down the street, his snack for later. 

King snatched one of the rice balls. "Deal."

"Oi!"

King gave him a peace sign and flicked him off.

Zoro let out an exasperated sigh. His shift had just started and it was already off to a terrible start. He plopped down in the shitty folding chair and threw his feet up on the flimsy desk, watching the small black and white monitors that overlooked the exhibits. Only a few couldn't be seen, one of them being the new mermaid exhibit. The tech guys hadn't come to install the camera yet. Which meant that Zoro had to walk the halls every so often, making sure everything was fine. If something happened to the mermaid, he would definitely be fired. 

He grabbed his flashlight from his belt, which also had mace and a nightstick. What the hell was he gonna do with some weak-ass pepper spray and a glorified baton? He walked through the aquarium, shining his light around the places that weren't illuminated at night. He jumped when he saw two eyes reflecting back at him. The mermaid's exhibit wasn't lit at night either. She was basically a person, she needed to sleep too. He tapped on the glass.

You covered your ears and frowned. The noise was amplified through water and it hurt your sensitive eardrums. 

"Oh shit. Sorry!" Zoro put his hands up to signal he meant no harm. "I didn't mean it." The mermaid swam up to the glass and mimicked his movements.

As far as he knew, it didn't talk. The mermaid did understand language though. He watched you copy him. Zoro did a few more poses to see if you would copy those too. He ended with making some kind of funny face, pulling his cheeks out and his lower eyelids down. Zoro was disappointed when you didn't copy that, and could swear you were laughing at him. Huh. He continued his rounds and returned to the office. The rest of the night was uneventful. 

The next few nights were more of the same. Each night when he stopped by your tank, he tried to make you laugh again, mostly to prove to himself that's what you were actually doing. Even though you didn't talk, you were obviously an intelligent creature. Tonight, he had a new game. Zoro wanted to see how smart you were. He also felt bad that you were stuck in that tank without anything to do and maybe this would be entertaining. He took three Solo cups and set them upside down on a cardboard box he brought over. Then, he showed you a piece of candy and put it under the cup. Zoro mixed up the cups slowly.

"Where is it?" Zoro watched as you pointed right away to where it was. "Nice. Ok." He grabbed the candy and backed away from the tank. It was nearly floor to ceiling. It was huge. There was a gap at the top where people went in and out to perform tank maintenance. Zoro aimed for the top and threw the candy into the tank, observing as it sank down and you swam to grab it. He laughed when you put it in your mouth and spit it out. "That's a sour one. Give it a chance." He laughed again as your face contorted with the sourness, relaxing a little as it got sweeter. You pointed at the cups. "So you liked that? Let's try faster." He went a few more rounds, giving you candy every time. Then, you disappeared, returning with three shells. You plucked a scale from your tail and stuck it to the bottom of one of the shells. You repeated his actions and looked at him expectantly. Zoro pointed at one of the shells and you turned it over, revealing no scale. "I meant that one." He pointed to the shell next to it and you flipped it. You grinned and took the scale out from under it, swimming to the top of the tank and leaning over the glass above him. Zoro caught the scale and looked at it in his hand. It was iridescent. He couldn't really say if it was blue or green or purple. It was kind of all three at once. “Thanks. I have to go now, but I’ll be back tomorrow, ok?” Zoro flipped the scale over in his hand, watching the colors melt together as he patrolled the corridors. He wondered what else he could entertain you with. You seemed to enjoy it a great deal. He wondered if you responded like this to any of the keepers or the guests of the aquarium. 

Unfortunately, Zoro had to call out sick the next two days, some kind of stomach bug. The next time he came around to your tank, you were nowhere to be found. He was tempted to tap on the glass again, but he knew you didn’t like that. Instead, he threw some candy in, the kind he knew you liked. Zoro waited for several minutes, opening a bag of chips that he had brought with him and popping a handful into his mouth. You emerged, drawn out by the candy, after a few minutes, darting out to grab it and go back to your hiding spot.

”Oi! Where ya goin?” Zoro yelled through a mouthful of chips.

You shot him a look from around the rock you hid behind. 

“What?!” Zoro was at a loss. “Did I do something?” 

You pointed at him, then to where he stood, then behind you. 

It took him a minute to remember, but he did. “You’re mad because I wasn’t here?”

You gave him a curt nod. 

“Aw man I’m sorry. I did say I would be back, huh?” He ran a hand through his hair. “I was sick. I couldn’t come to work.”

You stayed in your spot, eating the candy.

”How can I make it up to you?” Zoro would hate to piss off the only company he had during these long nights.  You coyly peeked around the corner and pointed to the chips in his hand.

“These?” Zoro held the bag out and you nodded. He couldn’t very well toss those to you. They would get soggy. He walked up the ‘employee only’ spiral staircase that went to the top of your tank. He didn’t like being up that high so he focused on looking into the water and not at the ground. 

You swam up to the rim of the tank, hands grabbing for the chips.

”Okay. Okay. You have to eat them here though or they’ll get mushy.” He handed the bag over. 

You carefully inspected the chip before biting into it, delighted by the crunch. 

Zoro hadn’t been this close to you previously. He noticed the different tones in your hair, how it flowed around you. He saw the slightly different colored speckles in your Y/E/C eyes. Your skin looked so soft and there were freckles he hadn’t noticed from behind the glass. There was a slight grin on his face as he watched you enjoy chips for the first time. You were particularly fascinated by the crunch, biting them slowly to listen to the noise they made. Zoro sat with you and took the empty bag when you were done.  “So am I forgiven?”

You looked him up and down before nodding slowly.

Zoro smiled. “Good. How about I come back with more tomorrow? Really this time.”

This time he kept his promise. Each day he brought you a new flavor. He figured out you didn’t really care for the spicy ones, probably because spice was a bit foreign to you, also explaining why human snacks were so intriguing. Maybe you would like the spice eventually. He would find you waiting at the top of the tank for your special treat. It was weird to watch you eat in silence, so he would tell you about his day or his roommate. Occasionally, he would tell you something about himself. You were a great listener since you didn’t talk. 

Several weeks passed like this. Zoro had to take a brief vacation to help his other roommate recover from eye surgery; there was a tragic accident involving a stag beetle. When he came back, Mihawk was none too pleased. King had taken over Zoro’s shift, but kept falling asleep since he was usually a day shifter. Every morning during this time, Mihawk would come in to take over and find that the snack counter had been raided. It looked like raccoons had gotten into the packages. Curiously, the cameras hadn’t picked up anything. They moved periodically, panning around. It seemed like whatever or whoever was stealing, could avoid them. Nothing else was tampered with or taken.  “Hey, shitbag. Hope you get the rat problem under control. Or Mihawk is gonna have your ass,” King slapped Zoro’s shoulder on the way out. 

“How is this my problem?! It happened on your watch!”

”And now it’s your watch.” King laughed as the door shut behind him. 

Zoro stopped at your tank, as was his routine now, and explained he didn’t have anything for you since he couldn’t get to the grocery store to restock. His eyes couldn’t be torn away from the disappointed pout that crossed your features. He was a bit ashamed to admit he really liked looking at your face. He wasn’t alone. Part of the attraction to the mermaid exhibit was your beauty. He didn’t like the idea he was the same as the people who paid to ogle you. He actually cared about your well-being. 

That night the thief struck again. Zoro didn’t see a thing. Oh, but he heard about it the next day. Mihawk lit his ass up, calling him as soon as he managed to fall asleep at home after his shift. He accused Zoro of falling asleep on the job again. That wasn't true, but it's possible that he was distracted, daydreaming perhaps. He would have conversations in his head with you. He imagined what you might sound like and how you might speak. He liked spending time with you and he wanted to know more about you, but couldn't do that if there was no way you could communicate with him. 

Zoro purposefully waited for King to leave before going in the back entrance. King would definitely taunt him over his shortcomings and he really didn't want to start the night that way. He was already in a bad mood since Mihawk woke him up just to yell at him earlier. Zoro sat heavily in his uncomfortable folding metal chair and slid down, knees pointing to opposite corners of the room, glaring at the monitors. He wasn't going to take his eyes off the screens for a second. He would get to the bottom of this just to rub it in Mihawk and King's faces that he could. 

When it came time for his nightly rounds, he checked every door and every window to make sure they were all locked. There wasn't any evidence around them that pointed to someone coming in from those potential entry points. He looked up at the air conditioning ducts. Is someone really going to go all spy movie just for some snacks? There was a noise in the direction of your tank that alerted him to the fact that he wasn't alone. Quickly, he ran in that direction, putting his flashlight in his mouth so he could hold his baton in one hand and his mace in the other. The large, open room came into view and he caught movement in the corner of his eye. Before he could react, he suddenly lost traction under his feet and was tumbling backwards. The last thing he remembered was hitting his head. 

His head was throbbing. Zoro groaned as he came to. Why am I wet? His entire back was wet, not damp, wet. He opened his eyes to soft light and a blurry, dark shape hovering over him. He blinked a few times, each blink making his vision clearer. A person? But there's not supposed- He pushed himself back, feeling around for his mace. 

"Who- Who are you?" He made contact with his flashlight and flicked it on, pointing it in the direction of the shadow. Red eyes flashed back as the light from the flashlight bounced off the back of your eyes, reflected to him. His eyes slid from yours, down your body, and landed on your tail. "Mermaid?" What was she doing out of the tank? 

You scooted closer, using your arms to pull you across the slick floor. 

Zoro looked at the water all over the floor and back at you. Your hair was plastered to your body where it was still wet, but he could see some parts that were fluffier and strands that were blown around lightly by the air conditioning. That made him think you had been sitting here with him for longer than a few minutes. How long had he been out for? He looked at the ceiling, which was partially made of glass, so that the mermaid could have natural light. The sky outside was the dusty purple color of early dawn. His shift would be over soon. And King would be coming to take over. King is coming! Suddenly, he was panicking. 

"We have to get you back in the water!" If King saw the mermaid like this, Zoro's ass was going to get canned. Zoro crouched in front of you, about to slip his arms under you so that he could carry you back to the water. He paused. "Oh... Um. Is it ok? Do you mind if I...?" 

You opened your arms up to reach for him.

He took that as an invitation, scooping you up bridal style. Your arms wrapped around his neck for support. Zoro didn't want to slip again, but he had to hurry to get you in the tank and all of the mess cleaned up before King got here. He jogged up the stairs to the top of the tank and gently dipped you down in the water. "Stay." He had no fucking clue how you got out, but he needed you to stay in. He zipped back down the stairs and hurriedly grabbed a mop from the janitorial closet, getting all the water dried from the floor. Zoro ran around the rest of the aquarium, making sure nothing happened while he was knocked out. Everything seemed to be fine. 

Zoro had just headed back to the security office when King came in to take over the shift. Just in time. He breathed a sigh of relief and then immediately started thinking about how the fuck you got down to where he was. Did you jump out of the tank? Crawl down the stairs? He was thinking about it until he went to sleep for the day. 

He came in early the next evening. The aquarium was still open and he went to see what your exhibit looked like when it was still open. The tank was big, but he wasn't quite convinced it was big enough for a creature like yourself. He watched as some guy banged on the glass with his hand. Zoro instantly frowned, knowing that you hated when people did that. He walked over and grabbed the man's wrist, pulling it away from the glass and thrusting it into the man's own chest. 

"Stop that." Zoro glared at the man. "She doesn't like that."

The man looked him up and down. "Who the fuck are you? Her keeper?"

"Actually, yeah. I am. So cut it out or you'll be escorted out." 

The man grumbled but didn't do it again.  

Zoro stood in front of the glass, eyes searching for you for a moment, finding you with a sweet smile on your face. You made the slightest nod in his direction, thanking him for putting an end to the horrible noise. Zoro stuck around until the people cleared out, making sure it didn't happen again. The last two people were a couple, who couldn't be bothered to stop their heavy petting after the two minute closing warning. You were staring curiously at them. He shooed them off and waved at you as he went to clock in and trade off with King.

There was some paperwork he had to take care of which delayed his usual stroll to your tank. It was about an hour past his usual stop in his loop. As he approached, he could hear shuffling and some crinkling. It stopped suddenly when his shoes make a squeak on the tile flooring. He cursed under his breath, inching forward slowly. There was the hurried sound of crunching followed by the slap of feet against the floor. 

"Stop! Thief!" Zoro yelled after the footsteps, nearly eating shit on the wet floor again. "Where the fuck is all this water coming from?" He ran down the hallway, then back up the hallway, then did a full loop, and stopped. He didn't hear the footsteps anymore. "Dammit." He snuck around more quietly on his way to get a mop. The thief had to be somewhere. He cleaned up the mess without any further sign of the intruder. Curiously, the snacks that were eaten included some of the flavors of chips he had brought you. That just meant the thief had good taste in snacks. Only two bags were eaten, so he wasn't worried about actually continuing his hunt. He could cover that up. Mihawk could shove it. All he cared about was getting to your tank. Zoro sighed. Now, he was really late. You were going to be mad at him. 

As it turned out, you weren't. Especially since Zoro had brought you something new to try. He was beginning to feel guilty. What if these foods were really bad for you? What if they made you sick? He also couldn't resist seeing the way you lit up when he came around with your nightly snack, or your pout when he pretended he forgot it, so he would continue to spoil you. Zoro climbed to his spot at the rim of the tank. You were already there waiting with your hands held out in a bowl-shape. 

"Didn't we talk about begging?" Zoro tsked at you. 

You held your hands out more demandingly and furrowed your eyebrows.

"Jeez. Okay, here you go." Zoro placed some incredibly misshapen small chocolate chip cookies in your hands. 

You gave them a curious sniff before putting all of them in your mouth at once, filling up your cheeks. 

Zoro chuckled. "You remind me of my roommate, who I had to fight off by the way, to get these to you." He averted his eyes for a moment and his cheeks turned pink. "I, um, made them myself." At the cost of shining his other roommate's work shoes for a week, he helped Zoro out with the baking. When he turned back, you were holding your hands out again and licking the crumbs from around your mouth. He grinned. "So you liked them?" 

You nodded. Reaching your hands out further. As he leaned down to put more in your hand, you caught sight of the pink in his cheeks. Reaching out curiously, you poked and pinched at his cheek. You didn't know humans could change color. 

Zoro jerked back. Not that he was afraid of you, he was just taken aback by your sudden interest in something other than food. "What? Is something on my face?" He only turned a deeper hue, cheeks burning red. 

You placed your palm against his cheek, feeling the warmth in it. Humans were a lot warmer than you thought. With the other hand, you continued to munch down cookies. You offered the last one back to him, noticing that he didn't eat any. 

Zoro wasn't aware that you knew the concept of sharing. "Thanks." He popped it into his mouth, stretching to swat a crumb out of your hair. 

You leaned forward and pressed your lips to his, just like those people from earlier. 

He pushed you, very gently, back. "Whoa! Hey, what are you doing?" If Zoro's cheeks were red earlier, now they were purple. "That's for- That's just for people who um-" He saw a hurt look on your face. "No, don't do that. It's okay!"  He patted your hand and explained. "You can't just do that. That's called a k-kiss and um, it's for two people that really like each other." 

But you did like him. Did he not like you? 

You still looked hurt. "Um, here, okay." Zoro knelt by the tank, getting his knees wet from where you had dripped. He held his arms out and waited until you copied him. "We're friends. So this is what friends can do. It's called a hug." He circled his arms around you, very lightly squeezing. You did it back, except you were not very gentle about it. "Oh, wow, you're a strong one huh?" Zoro let go, waiting for you to do the same. He waited some more. "You can let go now." There was a funny look in your eyes, and your smile was awfully sinister for a sweet mermaid. 

You pushed back from the edge of the tank, dangling his car keys in front of you.

Zoro felt his back pocket. "What the-?" He laughed. "You little shit." He motioned for you to come back. "Give those back!" 

You shook your head. 

"Please!" 

You looked at him expectantly. 

"I'll bring you more cookies tomorrow?"

You threw his keys back to him with surprising accuracy and he caught them in midair. 

Zoro shook his head to himself, walking back to the security office. He couldn't stop thinking about how soft your lips were.

For the next few days, nothing eventful happened. Zoro had racked up multiple weeks of doing Sandi's chores, just so he could learn to make a few more different cookies for you to try. Why was he doing all this? He told himself it was because he felt bad that you were trapped in a tank for the rest of your life. And he did feel bad about that, that part was true. Selfishly, he wanted you to like him. Tonight's batch hadn't gone well. He wasn't looking forward to breaking the news to you. Zoro hated seeing disappointment on your face. 

He was shocked when you were nonchalant about it, and a touch suspicious. Later, Zoro remembered that he stored an extra snack in his backpack and retrieved it to give to you. Again, he heard the telltale crinkling of a chip bag. This time, he would get the thief. Zoro must have startled them somehow even though he didn't make a sound because the thief took off running. He kept up this time, barely making out a shadow in the dark. As soon as he got close enough, he tackled the person, fingers brushing against bare, wet skin. What's with everything always being fucking wet!?.This person was... nude? What kind of sick pervert-? His thoughts were evaporated from his mind when he saw that it wasn't just any random naked person. It was you. "MERMAID?!" He looked down. "But there's legs and- a-and-!!!" Zoro got up faster than he'd ever moved and covered his eyes. "S-stay right there." He turned around and ran to his backpack, where he had a change of clothes for the gym. 

Zoro came back with a T-shirt and boxers, practically throwing them at you. From the top of his head to his neck was red. It turned out that your bottom half could turn into a human's, in every way. Funny, when you had a tail, your naked top half, covered by your long hair, didn't seem scandalous. With a naked bottom half, the naked top half was painfully obvious. 

"A-are you covered up?" Zoro peeked to make sure before dropping the hand over his eyes. "I'm so sorry for- for seeing and um... Sorry!" He felt bad about tackling you even though you weren't hurt. He offered you a hand to get up. Now it made sense. Every time he forgot a treat or was late in getting to you, the thief struck. It had been you all along. And the legs explained how you were able to get out of the tank, too. 

You were wobbly upon standing, as you always were when you got your legs.  You grabbed his shirt for balance as you stumbled unsteadily forward. 

Zoro gave you his arm to hold while you slowly gained control of your legs. He tried not to think about how cute you looked wearing his clothes, leading you toward the fish tunnels, where there weren't cameras. "I think you already understand, but you can never let anyone else see you like this, okay?" There was concern in his eyes. Zoro was certain they would turn you into an even bigger sideshow attraction than they already had. "And you have to stop stealing food or I'll be fired." Zoro held out the chocolate bar he had found in his backpack, yanking it back when you reached for it. "Mermaid, show me you understand." Zoro only relinquished the candy when you nodded.

Tearing into the packaging, you discarded it on the floor, holding the chocolate in your bare hands. 

"Oi! You're gonna get it everywhere." It was too late, as he saw the brown staining your hands. He sighed. "Never mind." 

You laughed at his alarm. 

"So you think it's funny, huh?" 

You nodded, popping another piece into your mouth. Your hand reached playfully to smear some on his cheek.

"Don't do that!"

You giggled again. 

He really couldn't be mad when your eyes were glittering with joy and your giggling brought a stupid grin to his face. He wiped off the chocolate and licked his finger. 

After the last bite, you looked at the mess on your hands and wiped them on your shirt, to Zoro's horror.

"Oi! What's wrong with you?! Quit that!" He grabbed your hands. "What are you? An animal?" He dragged you to the bathroom to wash your hands. 

You thought about it and nodded. 

"No! You're a person." Zoro stood behind you and guided your hands. It made sense that you had never washed your hands before. 

Watching the water made you thirsty. You bent down to drink out of the sink.

Zoro practically jumped backwards when your hips moved back against his. "H-hey. We'll get you some water. Come on." He knew you were unaware of what you were doing. It wasn't on purpose. He was ashamed at the thoughts that entered his brain at that second. Pushing them away, he grabbed your hand again and brought you to the water fountain, where he demonstrated how to use it. 

After that, he followed you as you walked through the nearby exhibits, the ones without surveillance. Zoro watched as you excitedly pointed towards some fish. You stopped in front of one of the larger tanks, putting your hands against the glass and smushing your face against it. This tank was much larger than yours because it held whale sharks. Your smile slowly fell into something more somber as you yearned to go back home. You missed the wide open ocean. 

As dawn approached, Zoro led you back to your tank, gesturing for you to go back. 

You shook your head.

"What do you mean no? You have to." Zoro hadn't seen you like this before. You weren't your normal perky, sweet self. "What's wrong?" 

Your lip quivered. You pointed to the doors and yourself. 

"You want to leave?" 

You nodded.

Zoro scratched his head. "You can't leave. I- I wish I could help you."

Tears spilled over the rims of your eyes. 

"Oh no. No. No. Don't do that." Zoro looked around as if there was someone else that could comfort you. Relenting, he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into him. "I'm sorry, mermaid. I really am." He felt you shake with sobs, gently sitting down with you on the floor. He ran his hand over your hair, thinking about how much of a loser he felt like. He let Mihawk and King walk all over him. Zoro hated this job. The only thing that made it tolerable was you. So why did he care so much about keeping it? Money and the ability to see you. He could find another job, but he couldn't find another you. "Mermaid, give me some time. I'll think of something. Okay?" 

You pulled your head away from him, with a sliver of hope in your red-rimmed gaze. You nodded. 

Zoro helped you out of his shirt, which you got stuck in trying to take off. He shut his eyes and turned around while you slid his boxers off and jumped back into the water. He squatted down and put his hand on your cheek, rubbing it with his thumb. "Stay." He said it tenderly, but he meant it. Zoro couldn't have anyone else finding out about your secret. 

Over the next few days, Zoro thought about how he could smuggle you out. If you disappeared and he never came back, it would be pretty obvious who stole you. If you disappeared, he would be fired anyway. He put that plan on the back burner and thought about how he might be able to improve your current living situation. 

"Don't you think the mermaid should be in a bigger tank?" 

Mihawk looked over his newspaper at Zoro. "Oh so you're a marine biologist all of the sudden." He was about to leave for the night but wanted to finish his articles first. 

Zoro rolled his eyes. "No. I just think the mermaid looks kinda sad lately." 

"You won't have to look at her sad face much longer." 

"What? What's that mean?" 

Mihawk lowered his paper once more. "Oh. You haven't heard? She's being transferred to a government facility." 

"Why!?"

Zoro's boss eyed him suspiciously. "Why do you care? Have a crush?" 

"Oi! Shut up, man. A guy can't feel bad for a creature that's nearly human being imprisoned? How would you like it?"

"I think if you feel bad for imprisoned creatures, this job isn't for you." 

"Yeah you're fucking right about that." Zoro was heated. 

Mihawk threw his paper on the desk. "Because you care so much, they want her for research." Before Mihawk clocked out, he tossed over his shoulder. "Say goodbye to your little fish friend. She's leaving tomorrow." 

Zoro was sweating with this new information. Tomorrow! He hadn't come up with any kind of plan. Maybe he could ask Luffy and Sanji if they would help. No, he couldn't ask his roommates to be accomplices. He avoided you until the last remaining hour of his shift, unsure how to tell you what was happening. Seeing you cry again was going to break his heart. Hell, his heart was already breaking because he knew he had no way to save you. He couldn't break you out of here, and he certainly couldn't steal you from a government facility. 

Zoro found you in your usual spot, waiting for him. You seemed to be in better spirits, which made it harder for him to tell you. He sat on the edge of your tank, setting his backpack down. He had planned to leave right after. "Listen." He let out a deep sigh. "I don't know how to tell you this but they're moving you out of here t-tomorrow." Your face brightened and you pointed to the door. He smiled apologetically. "No... not out out. You're being transferred somewhere else." He could see your eyes get glassy. You pointed to him, then yourself, then the door. "I- I can't. There's no way." Zoro held his head in his hands and apologizing over and over again. 

You pushed yourself up to sit on the edge of the tank as well, wrapping your arms around him. The two of you sat like that for some time. Zoro ran his hand through your hair, trying to memorize the way it felt before he had to say goodbye. You leaned your head on his shoulder, staring into his gray eyes. He shifted so that you could face him better. Leaning forward, you paused, as if asking permission, and Zoro didn't stop you as you pressed your lips to his again. His hand tangled in your hair, pressing you deeper into the kiss. He let out a startled noise when you bit him on the lip and you felt heat rise to your cheeks as you broke the kiss and looked away bashfully. 

"No. No. It's- It's okay." Zoro's voice was low and raspy. "Do it again." 

You did as he asked, lightly biting him on the lip, and he returned the favor. You pressed your tongue into his mouth, running it alongside his own. He groaned. Now! When he was fully distracted, you tugged him into the water with you. His eyes widened in terror as you pushed him to the bottom of the tank, sucking the rest of the air out of his lungs. You broke the kiss and touched the side of his face lovingly, watching him flail as he fought to break free from your grip. You petted his hair as he had done to comfort you. Only a minute or two more before he became unconscious. It hurt you to do it, but you couldn't live like this anymore. You had waited for him, though that didn't mean you couldn't also think of a plan in case he failed. 

When King came in, not long after, he immediately noticed something wasn't right. None of the lights were on. The power was out. He rushed to the emergency generator and powered it on. All the pumps to the tanks were connected to it in case something like this happened. Without the backup power, it would only take a few hours for creatures to start dying off. With it on, some of the lights flickered back on. The generator only powered the most important electronics, not the cameras. Naturally, the first thing King did was check on the most valuable assets. While his eyes scanned your tank, trying to find you, they instead found Zoro floating at the top of the water. 

Within 15 minutes, the aquarium was swarming with first responders. In the chaos, no one noticed someone in a gym shirt and boxers run out the front doors, all their attention on Zoro. Nor did they notice the drying puddle near the main circuit breakers, located unwisely next to the mermaid's tank.  

Zoro had no fucking idea what happened. He thought it was just a nightmare until he woke up in a hospital. They said someone broke into the aquarium and stole the mermaid. They shorted out the main power so there was no security footage. It was assumed that Zoro was defending the mermaid when the attacker got the upper hand on him. Mihawk had left him a message wishing him a speedy recovery and to take his time coming back to work, in fact, maybe he shouldn't come back at all. He was cleared for discharge after a day with some antibiotics to prevent pneumonia from setting in. 

When he came back to his apartment, Sanji greeted him from the kitchen. "Hey, assface. Your girlfriend has been waiting for you for a whole day now. What the fuck is wrong with you? Making a girl as pretty as her wait? I don't even know how you managed to pull someone like her." He was half-pouting as he said this.

"Girlfriend?" Zoro didn't have a girlfriend. 

"Yeah she was in your clothes. She's your girlfriend isn't she? While you were busy laying your lazy ass in the hospital, she showed up looking for you. Well, I assumed so. She doesn't talk much." 

Zoro didn't wait for the blonde man to finish before running into his room. 

Luffy piped up from the couch, calling after him. "Tell her to quit eating all my snacks!" 

When he opened his door, you were sitting in the middle of his bed, surrounded by empty snack wrappers. His previously white shirt, now on you, was covered in orange and brown snack residue fingerprints. Your entire face lit up upon seeing him. You jumped from the bed and ran to him, throwing your arms around him and peppering kisses all over his face. 

"Oi!" He pushed you back lightly. In a quiet voice he hissed, "You drowned me!" 

You nodded happily and bounced on the balls of your feet in an excited way. You pulled him back down and rubbed your nose against his.  

The pieces gradually fell into place. "This was your plan." He grabbed your face as you nodded again. "I knew you were fucking smart." He pulled you in for a hug before kissing you. 

You pulled away, grinning. You were hyperventilating with excitement and working up courage. 

"Easy. Breathe. " Zoro could see you were trying to communicate something. "What is it?" 

"S-s-s." You furrowed your brows. 

Zoro's eyes widened. He didn't think you could speak. 

"S-stay." You pointed to yourself, soft, hopeful eyes tilted towards the green-haired man. "Stay?" 

A reassuring grin crept across his face. "Stay." He pulled you in for another hug, resting his chin on your head. 

[auraisereigh]

"Conflicted"

chapter eleven

Brennan Sorrengail x Riorson reader Blurb: After her agreement with Brennan, she seeks her brother out to sort her own feelings out wc: 7.3 ☆ SPOILERS FOR THE EMPYREAN SERIES. Talk about conflicted feelings. Grief. Uses pronouns: she/her. i use Star as a nickname as y/n sounds weird, and i'm awful with names.

Masterlist ☆ Dragon guide ☆ Star's story ☆ Empyrean guide ☆ Support me

I find my brother in the mess hall during dinner, he's sitting with Liam, I know Liam from his mother but I've never actually had a conversation with him.

I sit down next to Xaden once I reach their table, he doesn't seem that tense anymore, I suppose the healers gave him some soothing cream or painkillers.

I shift a little closer and lean my head on his shoulder and then it hits me, he's back. He seems to notice the shift in my emotions as his head turns to me, away from his plate. "You okay, little sister?" He asks as he raises a brow. I roll my eyes at the nickname. "Yes, I am, matter of factly okay. Best I've ever been in two months." I say sarcastic and he lets out a small huff of a laugh at my answer.

I look over to where Liam sits and he smiles bittersweet. He has a little sister, of course he would want to see her. My heart aches for him.

I sit back up straight and look at Xaden. "We need to talk." I say quietly. He looks my way and he raises his brow again on question. I give him a pleading look and he gives him.

"Give us a minute." Xaden tells Liam. Liam all but smiles. "Totally fine." He says, his voice understanding.

Xaden grabs my arm and pulls me up from my chair to my feet, letting go once we start walking. We don't speak, I don't even look at him. All I'm doing is going over what I wanna say to him once we're behind closed doors.

We walk up the stair case to the second floor and he opens the door to the family quarters for me, waiting for me to go first as he holds the door open.

I walk through and he follows closely, closing the door behind him. I stop at the couch, not sitting down but leaning against it.

The first time I saw my brother earlier it didn't last long as my anger took over but now I feel calmer, more relieved that he's here.

"How did the healers go?" I ask softly. I don't wanna remember what I saw on his back. The cuts, some healing, some not. "Good, they just cleaned them up again. Told me to come back again tomorrow for a check up." He shrugs. I shouldn't have expected anything else.

He steps closer, his much taller from towering over me. "Are you okay?" He asks with a raised brow. "You stormed out of the assembly room like you were going to light something on fire." I look away. How am I supposed to explain to my brother that the son of the woman who cut in his back is here, living, and that after I stormed out I yelled at him?

"I'm.... Confused- more like conflicted." Even my voice comes out confused. "Why?" It's a simple question yet I stay quiet, searching for the right words to explain it.

"What would you do... If you're friends with someone who you don't know at all, only to find out that he is not the person you thought he is but the person you know think he is isn't him either?" That has got to be the worst explanation the lord has ever heard. His brow stays raised. "You're talking about the Sorrengail." He states. Wait, he knows? "You're aware of it." I state back.

"Yes, they wanted me to know in case I would find out the way you did. Which is, what I'm assuming, your conflict?" He asks but it's clear in his eyes that he already knows the answer.

I stay quiet, not knowing what to say. His mother cut into Xaden's back, yet he seems to have less conflicted feelings than I do.

I take a deep breath. "Naolin died..." I start, my voice instantly starts wavering, emotions building up. His eyes soften. "I'm sorry, Star."

I ignore his apology, it's not his fault anyway. It's dad's. "Brennan was dying and Naolin gave his life for Brennan's. Naolin was smart, he wouldn't just do that for anyone..." I sniff a few times before continuing. "Which let me to trust Brennan. Until I found out who his mother was and ever since i... I can't look at him the same anymore. All I see is the son of the woman who did so much harm to us, to our people..." I feel a few tears fall down my cheek but I wipe them away. "I want to trust him, to know him and his connection to... Naolin. But everytime I try something happens like you coming back and she cut into your back and all the effort I put in to look over who his mother is just crumbles. Shatters in a thousand pieces that I can't put together anymore." I finish. And by the end of that I'm hugging myself in an attempt to comfort myself. I let out a deep breath.

After a moment of silence he speaks up. Unlike him, usually I just vent to him, he comforts me and that's that. Not advice. "And you're judging him because of his mother? Or because your gut tells you something is wrong with him?" He ask patient. He knows there's no point in rushing me.

"His mother." I admit in a whisper. It sounds awful, judging someone based on their parents and their actions even when a child cannot control what their parents do and it doesn't mean that you're your parents child that you're like them. He doesn't even need to say anything, I know where my mistakes lie but how to fix them...

It's like he can read my mind, not so abnormal for siblings to know each other but still. "Talk to him." He says encouraging. "Ask him what you need to know, what you need to start figuring things out when it comes to him." He keeps his voice slightly encouraging and reassuring.

Well Brennan had scheduled a... Date? Meeting? Whatever it is. It's now Wednesday, and he said he'd come pick me up at Friday night. So that means that Friday night I can try again to put the pieces back together when it comes to him.

I nod at him, showing him that I understand what he's saying and that I will take the advice.

☆

Later that night xaden and I sit on the couch of the family quarters, quiet, while we're eating. It's handy that the family quarters has its own kitchen, downside, almost all the food was expired. I still managed to find some things in the kitchen of the mess hall and one of the employees told me she'd bring some food up tomorrow so we could cook here. Not that that's the best idea, I'm pretty sure I would burn down the kitchen if I tried.

I look Xaden's way again, he hasn't said a word. He's just quietly eating his food. I know it's selfish but I need to know. I build up my courage and speak. "Did you still see dad? You know, after... he got captured." My voice is a quiet whisper.

He stops with what he's doing. He doesn't look at me, he just stares at his plate and it's clear he won't say anything. "M' sorry." I mumble. I stare at my plate, my mind hollow. The ache in my heart still hurts and it feels as if the wound in my heart still bleeds.

"I got to say goodbye." Xaden mumbles from the other side of the couch. "It wasn't much, not long but enough." His voice stays a mumble. Tears prick in my eyes and the ache in my heart hurts more. "What did he say?" I ask and my voice wavers over the question.

Xaden sits up straight and places his plate on the table. "Not much, that he loved us, that we had to take care of each other. The stuff you would expect." His voice takes a hint of coldness and I know I'm pushing. I know I shouldn't push him, it's selfish but I need to know. "He told me he has two letters in his office for us." I blink at that, I spend the first week back cleaning almost everything out, just to make sure I wouldn't miss anything for a possible future rebellion. I never found letters. Maybe I put them in one of the sorted boxes? Maybe he moved them and forgot it? He had been interrogated and... Tortured... Xaden probably saw him after that happened.

I can't help but reach out with my hands to his head, like a memory reader would. The red veins of magic appear on my hands. "Don't." He bites and I automatically retreat. "I know what you're gonna do. You don't want to see it." He says, his tone as sharp. I stay frozen in my spot, I'm used to Xaden not being the most emotional person but he was never this cold with me. I pushed too far too soon and the guilt seeps in, my heart starts hurting for another reason, that I had pushed my little brother to talk about things he wasn't ready for, after everything he'd been through and every burden he had to carry because I wasn't there for him. "I'm sorry." It's not enough but it's the only thing I can offer right now.

"I know why you wanna see it, you want to be sure but this is not something you need to see." His voice is a little softer but there is still an audible hint of cold. I can't blame him.

I get up from the couch, putting my plate on the table as well. I walk past Xaden, giving him a small goodnight kiss on his forehead and walk away but not in the direction of my room, but not that far away either.

☆

My hand trembles when I reach for the door handle and open it, the strong scent that I always associated with my dad still hangs in the air and emotions, just like the last few weeks, threaten to overwhelm me. I walk in the room and close the door behind me. Everything about this room reminds me of him, it's why I've avoided this room like the black death.

I don't bother to look for the letter, I'm too tired for that. Finding those letters will be something I'll do another day.

I make my way to his bed, he probably has the largest bed of all of us, the silk, beige sheets are neatly placed on the bed, pillows puffed up. His night stand holds normal things for a nightstand, unlike mine. A few candles, a book, a picture from when we were little. I know he keeps more pictures in the drawer.

I lay down on his bed and my body relaxes immediately. The scent of sandalwood, mint and vanilla hit hard. I pull at the sheets to cover myself. The warmth providing a protective barrier. His window is closed but the moonlight shines through. I stare at it until I fall asleep.

And dream of memories with my dad.

☆

Taglist: @honethatty12 @smashee0789 @awkardnerd @randomperson1234sblog@bangtanxberm@hyperactive-bookworm-0 @littowl @thebreadisthetruevillian

[oliversrarebooks]

Have you considered what Oliver would be like as a vampire? I think he would be nice, with an aura like when you’re all cozy in bed and don’t have to get up, you can just enjoy the coziness. Treating any thrall he picked up with respect and intelligence, like a student and their favorite teacher.

Masterlist

September 1925 - In another universe...

TW: mind control, hypnotic induction

Pines Rare Books and Curiosities was probably Lex's greatest find since he'd arrived in the city.

It was a tiny shoebox of a store in a run-down district, but every single inch was packed with the most unusual and fascinating books. Not only did Mr. Pines stock hard to find imported books and gorgeous editions of classics, but many eclectic volumes of the kind Lex would never find in his university's library. Books on vampires and werewolves, on witchcraft and magic, on alchemy and sorcery and divination.

Lex was starting to suspect that the nervous-looking, unassuming proprietor might actually be a wizard.

"Good evening, sir," said Mr. Pines -- he always called Lex 'sir' when greeting him, even though Lex was barely twenty and Mr. Pines must be at least a decade older. "Is there anything in particular you're looking for?"

Lex felt a bit guilty about spending so much time in the shop and only occasionally buying anything, but Mr. Pines didn't seem to mind. If anything, he encouraged the company, offering books he thought Lex might enjoy and even allowing him to sit in one of the plush chairs behind the counter to read. Lex couldn't resist, drawn to the books and the comfortable chair and the always-roaring fireplace like a moth to the flame. It was such a peaceful retreat from the loud commotion of campus life.

There was a strange look in Mr. Pines' eye as he pulled something from behind the counter. It was a notebook bound in blue leather with no title on the front. "If you don't mind..." he said. "I've been working on writing some stories of my own. I'd like some opinions on them, and I know you have a discerning taste in literature."

"You want me to read your stories?" said Lex, surprised. "Well... I suppose I'd be happy to." Just because Mr. Pines was smart and well-spoken was no guarantee that his writing would actually be good, but Lex felt flattered that he'd asked, and it was the least he could do considering how often he used the bookshop as a sanctuary.

"Then please, have a seat," said Mr. Pines, gesturing to one of the plush chairs near the fire. "I do appreciate the help."

Lex took the notebook and settled himself down. The fire was warm as usual and smelled especially nice today. "What's that scent from the fire, Mr. Pines?"

"Oh, I added dried herbs tonight. The weather has been gloomy, so I thought some nice calming herbs would improve the mood."

Lex took a deep breath. It was so relaxing in the bookshop, as though he could simply let his cares melt away. The notebook had beautiful creamy paper that was satisfying to touch, and Mr. Pines had written out his story in neat script that was easy to read. Before long, Lex was starting to be engrossed in it.

The story followed a vampire, alone and starving in the city after his sire had died, fighting his urges to drink from humans even as he was haunted by the threat of starvation. While it was a straightforward plot, the way it was written was riveting, as though he was actually there, experiencing the feelings of the vampire. At one point, he vaguely wondered how much time had passed, but he couldn't even bring himself to look away from the book long enough to check his watch.

The vampire was giving into his urges, now. He'd lured a young man from a cafe and was ensorcelling him, binding him to the vampire's will. The book described in loving detail how the young man began to succumb slowly but surely to the vampire's hypnotic spell... his mind dulling and slowing, his eyelids growing oh-so-heavy, helplessly getting sleepier and sleepier as the vampire pulled him deeper under his power...

Lex yawned. The descriptions of the young man getting so drowsy were starting to make him feel drowsy, too. The smell of the calming herbs and the pleasant heat of the fire were also lulling him asleep. He'd been here a while, he thought. He should check the time. But he wanted to keep reading.

The young man's eyes began to flutter closed against his will as the vampire drew him so close. "It's too late for you to fight," said the vampire in the story. "You belong to me."

"Yes... master..." said the poor human victim, his mind struggling against the words, trying to fight off the sleepy haze and escape. But it was no use -- the vampire had him utterly at his mercy.

The human's eyes shut tight as he swooned in the vampire's arms, exposing his tender neck for the monster to drink, to feed, to replenish himself off of the victim's life-force...

Lex startled awake. It wasn't as though the book was boring -- on the contrary, it was fascinating -- but the quiet, peaceful shop and the subject matter had him half-asleep. He wanted to finish the story, but he wasn't quite sure where he'd left off. Maybe he should reread the entire part of the vampire enthralling the human, just to make sure he hadn't missed anything...

"What are you doing to me?" said the human in the story. "I feel so strange... so sleepy..."

"Oh, you poor helpless soul," said the vampire, stroking his cheek and directing the human's gaze into his eyes. "You will sleep. You will obey. You will not resist."

Lex swallowed. He didn't understand why he felt so drawn to the victim in the story, why he wanted to be in his place. Why he wanted to read the passage over again. Why it was so hard to think of anything else. Surely that was an insane thought -- no one of sound mind would want to be captured and fed on by some supernatural monster.

"You're getting so sleepy, so helpless, so vulnerable," said the vampire, on Lex's fifth or sixth reread of the passage. 

The words blurred before his eyes. He was... he was so sleepy...

"Shhh, Lex," said a gentle, kind voice at his ear, as a hand tousled his hair. "You're so sleepy, aren't you?"

"Mr... Mr. Pines..." said Lex, so groggy, like he was trying to rouse himself from a deep slumber. "I'm -- your book --"

"So quiet, Lex. You're so very quiet, aren't you? So still and silent while you read."

Quiet... still... silent... yes, that was it... he'd always cherished the quiet...

"Your mind is so quiet. So utterly still. Falling asleep with a good book by the fire."

"Mmmm," he said, with a sleepy smile on his face.

"Let me take this," said Mr. Pines, removing the book from Lex's hands. "You're going to fall asleep now, Lex. And your mind is going to go completely quiet."

Lex didn't even register that something was wrong, that maybe he should resist. He felt completely at ease, peaceful and warm and comforted. As his drowsy eyes fluttered closed, a wool blanket was being wrapped around him, cocooning and immobilizing him. He was being picked up with a strength that may have worried him if his mind weren't falling asleep.

He didn't want to ask where he was going. He wanted to be quiet.

"Sleep, Lex. Sleep deeply in the dark and the silence."

Lex felt as if he were being gently rocked to sleep as he was carried, the creak of stairs giving the only indication of where he was being taken. 

He was set back down again in a few minutes. "You're going to be completely still, Lex. Completely asleep. You won't make a sound. You're going to feel a little pain, but it won't wake you up. And then you're going to drift even deeper asleep."

Lex may have nodded his assent if he weren't so still.

The blanket was being moved, his shirt unbuttoned and moved aside. Something sharp grazed his neck, and then punctured. And then he was falling, falling so deep asleep, so deeply drowsy and still and silent --

He flickered very briefly back into consciousness as he was set onto a bed, before sleep dragged him under once more.

Masterlist Next

I was happy with how this AU scenario turned out! There will be a part two.

@d-cs @latenightcupsofcoffee @thecyrulik @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @wanderinggoblin @whumpyourdamnpears @only-shadows-dwell-where-we-are @pressedpenn @pigeonwhumps @amusedmuralist @xx-adam-xx @ivycloak @irregular-book @whumpsoda @mj-or-say10 @pokemaniacgemini @whumpshaped @whumpsday @morning-star-whump @shinyotachi @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @pirefyrelight @theauthorintraining-blog @whump-me-all-night-long @anonfromcanada @typewrittenfangs @tessellated-sunl1ght @cleverinsidejoke @abirbable @ichorousambrosia @a-formless-entity @annablogsposts @ghost-whump

[alotofpockets]

Off limits | Leslie Shay | 18+

Pairing: Leslie Shay x Severide!Reader & Kelly Severide x Sister!Reader Reader pronouns used: she/her Summary: You meet a girl in a bar, what happens when you find out that she's your brother's best friend?

Warnings: 18+, minors DNI

Masterlist | Chicago Fire masterlist | Words: 2k

It has been years since you’ve called Chicago home. You decided to move away from the city after the death of your father, Benny Severide, he was everywhere you looked. Mourning him while being surrounded by everything that reminded you of him was impossibly hard. Your brother Kelly, completely supported your decision and had even helped you move. Now that you had fully processed his death, you thought it was time to move back. You decided to call Kelly on your drive over. 

“Hey, sis, what’s up?” He said as he picked up the phone, by the loudness of his surroundings you knew he was on shift. “Is now a good time? I can call back later.” You should’ve known by now that he would make time for you no matter what. “You’re all good.” You stop at a redlight and continue your conversation with your brother. “I’m moving back to Chicago, actually I just started driving.” You could hear the happiness in his voice, “I’m so glad you’ll be closer again. Have you found a place yet?” He asks. “No not yet, I figured I would just stay at a hotel until I find a place.” Kelly was quick to respond, “Don’t be ridiculous, you can stay with me and Shay until you find something.” You hear a muffled voice on the other side of the line and then a response from Kelly, “Otis, stop it, she is my sister!” His next words are aimed at you, “Just so you know, 51 is off limits for dating, understood?” You laughed, “You’ve got it. I’ll see you later, bye Kelly.” 

You arrived in Chicago after a couple of hours, you felt like walking around for a while before heading over to the address that your brother texted you. It was good to be back, you had always loved it here. You were nearing the cemetery where your dad was buried, contemplating whether you should go visit his grave, ultimately deciding that you were ready. It was the first time you had been here since the day of the funeral, you noticed that the grave was well kept and fresh flowers were standing in a vase next to the headstone. It did you well knowing that Kelly came to visit him, when you weren’t able to. Your next stop was your favorite bar, you needed a drink after this big step. 

The ambiance in the bar was exactly as you remembered it. The string lights on the ceiling, the pictures of the locals on the wall, and the laughter and conversation filling the room. You spot a free chair at the bar and claim it. You order a beer, a burger and some fries. “Here you go.” The bartender hands you your beer, “The food will be out shortly.” You smile and thank him. Sipping on the beer, you look around the bar, you love to people watch and what better location than a busy bar? There was a group of older men playing a card game, the table filled with pints of beers. At the pool table you spotted a group, you assumed to be twenty five years old, playing an intense game of pool. You move on to the next part of the bar where you find a woman your age playing a game of darts with a fifty year old man, your eyes linger on the blonde woman. She throws her last dart and cheers, “You owe me a drink, Frank!” You miss the rest of the interaction as your food gets placed in front of you. 

You start on your burger and after a few bites the woman stands next to you at the bar. “A beer, please, and can you add it to Frank’s tab?” The bartender looks over to Frank, after a thumbs up he places a beer in front of her. “Smart way to get free drinks.” You comment. “Right?” The woman laughs. “Mind if I sit with you for a moment?” You pretend to think for a moment. “Depends, will you be tricking me into buying you drinks as well?” You joke. The woman is quick to respond, “Don’t worry, I don’t trick pretty girls into buying me drinks.” She raised her beer to cheers it with you. A small blush reaches your cheeks, “Then please take a seat.” She smiles and takes a seat. “I’m Leslie, by the way.” You shake her hand and introduce yourself as well, “Pleasure to meet you, Leslie, I’m y/n.” She smirks, “The pleasure is all mine.” 

The two of you fall into conversation easily. You watch as Leslie takes one of your fries, you don't mind at all, but you think it's funny that she just started eating your food. She realizes your eyes on her and realizes what she did. "Oh, I'm sorry. I don't know why I did that without asking you first." You place your hand on her knee, stopping her from rambling. "I don't mind, eat as many as you want." Leslie smiles your way, "Okay, but let me buy you your next drink. Another beer?" You tell her that she doesn't have to buy you a drink in return for eating your fries, but she insists. "Okay, but something non-alcoholic like a club soda or something. I have a feeling this will be an evening that I'd like to remember." You say with a subtle wink. Leslie smirks, and orders "Two club soda's, please."

You have just finished your food when Leslie’s favorite song comes on. “Come dance with me, please. This is my absolute favorite song!” Her enthusiasm pulls you over the edge to say yes. She takes your hand and guides you to the middle of the bar. While keeping hold of your hand she starts dancing around, once again her enthusiasm is contagious and you start dancing with her, the whole crowd at the bar disappears and it’s just you and her jumping around, dancing, and laughing. When the song comes to an end Leslie pulls you close, you’re both still breathing hard from the exercise you just did, but neither of you cared and crashed your lips together. You had been thinking of kissing her since the moment she took the seat next to you at the bar, but nothing you had imagined could amount to her lips actually being on yours. You each got carried away in the moment, but got pulled back to reality by the bar crowd cheering and whistling loudly. You look around the room wide eyed, not having expected so many people to watch you make out with someone. Leslie notices and takes your hand once more, “Come on, let’s get out of here.” 

After making sure you’re okay with it, she takes you to her apartment two blocks over. Once inside she takes your hand and guides you to her bedroom. She closes the door and pushes you against it, she wastes no time and starts kissing you again. This time without any crowd interruptions you deepen the kiss and soon your hands are exploring each other's bodies. You unbutton her flannel and drop it to the floor, she does the same to your shirt. Next thing you know she’s laying on top of you in her bed. You weren’t typically one to kiss on a first date, let alone go home with a stranger, but with Leslie it was different. The way she was pleasuring you felt more special, more meaningful than a one night stand. You hoped that she felt the same way. When you were both catching your breath, laying down next to each other, Leslie is quick to let you know that she feels the same way. “Please stay the night. I know we did things kind of backwards but I’d love to take you on a breakfast date in the morning.” You smile wide before kissing her softly, “I’d love that too.” 

You’re awoken the next morning by Leslie cuddling into your side. You smile with your eyes still closed and wrap your arm around her, cuddling her back. “Good morning.” She says in a raspy morning voice. You say good morning back and the two of you lay in bed cuddling for a little while longer, until Leslie offers you some coffee. Leslie gets out of bed first and grabs a shirt from the floor and puts it on, she looks down and laughs, “This is yours.” You laugh with her, “It looks good on you. Give me your flannel, please.” Leslie walks out of the room in just the shirt and her underwear, so you follow her lead and leave your pants in the room. You follow her into the kitchen and stand next to her at the counter as she fills two cups with coffee. That’s when you hear a door open somewhere in the apartment, you hadn’t exactly gotten as far as talking about roommates last night. You quickly button up the flannel some more, mentally thanking Leslie for the oversized flannel, covering you until mid-thigh. Nothing could’ve prepared you for the next moment, your brother walked into the kitchen. “Kelly?” You question out loud, confused as to what was happening. “Y/n? What are you  doing here?” Leslie looks confused between the two of you. Kelly walks closer and asks another question before you can even answer the first one. “And why aren’t you wearing any clothes?” He then looks over to Leslie, who is also not wearing enough clothes. “Oh no, no, no. I told you not to date anyone from 51.” 

Leslie is starting to connect the dots of Kelly’s sister coming to visit and the two of you knowing each other. A laugh escapes her mouth, but she quickly holds it in as Kelly sends her a stern look. “Just so we’re all clear, I did not know she was your roommate or worked at 51. Actually, thinking about it, you told me your roommate's name was Shay, this is Leslie.” Leslie steps closer to you and extends her hand, you take it with a confused look on her face. “Leslie Shay.” She says the laughter she’s holding is still present on her face. “Y/n Severide.” You say defeated. “Okay, now we’ve got that all figured out, I’m going to put some clothes on. Excuse me.” Leslie goes to follow you but is stopped by Kelly grabbing her arm. “Shay, you’re my best friend but she’s my little sister. I don’t know what your intentions are but if you hurt her..” Leslie stops him before he can finish his sentence. “Look, I don’t know what the future holds but I really like her. I’ve never felt this strongly about a person from the start, she’s special, and my intention was to take her out for breakfast this morning, please join us.” She doesn’t leave room for Kelly to respond and walks to her room. She knocks on the door before entering, she finds you sitting on her bed, staring at the floor. “Hey, it’s okay. He might kill me if I hurt you but I don’t intend on hurting you. He’s just being protective, he’ll be fine.” You take a deep breath, “Yeah, you’re probably right. This just wasn’t at all what I expected this morning.” She sits down next to you on the bed and hugs you tight. “I invited him to join us for breakfast, I hope that’s okay. He can’t be mad over food, trust me.” 

She was right, Kelly saw the way the two of you were interacting and his worries for you getting hurt eased. He trusted both you and Shay, you were both adults. You just also happened to be the two people he cared the most about in this world, but maybe that was a good thing, his two favorite people meeting and getting along so well. Kelly insisted on paying for breakfast, despite Leslie’s insisting that she’s got it. Leslie leans into your and whispers, I’ll take you on an actual date next time.

💗If you enjoyed this fic, please consider buying me a coffee💗 

[puzzled-pegasus]

The Demigods Discuss: Man vs Bear

(tw for implied SA topics in dialogue)

Literally the demigods just talk abt the man vs bear question and why girls choose the bear

“Annabeth,” Percy asked, “do you know about the Man vs. Bear internet debate thing?”

Annabeth and the rest of the Seven Demigods sat in conversation on the Big House porch at Camp Half-Blood. Piper sat next to her on the porch swing, and Percy was in a chair on her other side.

“Yeah,” Annabeth answered. “What about it?”

“What do you think about it?” His green eyes contained no judgment, just curiosity.

“Like, which would I choose?”

“Yeah.”

“Well…I suppose it's different since I’m not mortal,” Annabeth said thoughtfully. “I could technically defend myself just fine if the man was mortal. And since I’ve killed so many monsters, a plain old bear probably wouldn't scare me much. In a fight, I’d probably choose the mortal guy. Especially if I don't have any weapons.”

“Oh, true,” Percy said. “What about, uh. Demigod man versus…like…one of the magic bears Artemis hunts?”

“Then, yeah. Bear.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“Well, it’s easy for you to pick the bear,” Leo butted in from his conversation with Jason. “You could just think up a way to kill it, easy peasy. Or punch it in the snout and send it crying home to its mama bear.”

Annabeth considered that. “That's true,” she said. “The point is that the man is still more dangerous, though.” She noticed Frank, Hazel and Jason were suddenly quiet, and everyone was looking at her now.

“What if he's a less powerful demigod?” Jason asked. “Son of Iris or Baccus or something?”

“Well…part of the hypothetical is that you don’t get to pick the man. It should be the same for a demigod; you don't get to pick whether they're powerful or not.”

“Hmm. I guess that makes sense.”

“I’d still choose a bear over a random mortal guy,” Piper joined in. “Mortals can still hurt and kill demigods.”

“Yeah, they technically could,” Annabeth said.

“And I don't have my dagger?”

“Nope, no weapons.”

“Okay. I mean, I guess I could charmspeak the mortal guy into leaving me alone. But like, what if they sneak up on me? I’d have nothing.”

“I’m pretty sure a magic grizzly is more dangerous than a mortal guy,” Percy said skeptically. “Can you even charmspeak a bear?”

“I’m…not sure, actually,” Piper said. “But, I mean…the worst the bear could do is maul me to death.”

“But the mortal’s just…some guy,” Jason argued. “What's the worst he could do to a girl like you?”

Leo’s expression changed so severely that Annabeth thought he was going to start his deck chair on fire. Annabeth knew exactly what he was thinking, but she was surprised—and a little impressed—that he was the first one to give Jason a scolding look.

“What the fuck do you think, man?” Leo snapped. “Pipes, you want to burst his bubble, or should I?”

“Yeah, man,” Percy growled, “what the hell?”

“No, I know!” Jason held up his hands, looking at Leo warily. “I just meant that Piper could fight him off, easy. Couldn't she? And there's a good chance that the guy doesn't even want to hurt you.”

“Okay, listen,” Piper said. “Take it from someone who's been surrounded by mortals for my whole life. They can be as smart and vicious as any demigod. There's plenty of them who are stronger than me. If the only thing I have is my charmspeak against some guy who really wants to hurt me, demigod or human…all they’d have to do is cover my mouth.” She gripped the edge of the porch swing she was sitting on.

“And if you were mauled by a bear,” Annabeth added, “at least people would believe you.” She threw a pointed glance in Jason’s direction, and he flinched a little, giving Annabeth a glimmer of schadenfreude.

“Yeah,” Piper said, “that, too.”

“I suppose I shouldn't underestimate mortals, either,” Annabeth reflected. “I mean, it’s not like I have any powers besides wisdom. I’m generally pretty confident in my ability to defend myself, but…I don't know. Hubris is dangerous. And I haven't spent enough time around mortals to really know what they're capable of, like you, Piper.”

“Annabeth, you're way tougher and smarter than any mortal,” Percy said. She could tell he was trying to be reassuring, but he also didn't really get it. How could he?

“I know, Seaweed Brain,” she said. “Thank you. I do still think a bear would be easier. I wouldn't even have to kill it, just get it to run away. And it wouldn't come back to retaliate with the sickest torture it can think of. It wouldn't pretend to be my friend and care about me, and then hurt me when I least expect it.”

“That's…very true.”

Annabeth noticed Hazel hadn't said anything. She sat between Frank and Leo, watching the conversation. Her expression was hard for Annabeth to read.

“You okay, Hazel?” Annabeth asked her.

“Mmmhm, fine.” Hazel nodded.

“What do you think?” Piper asked. “About the argument.”

“What's the argument?” Hazel asked. “What are the man and the bear from?”

“A hypothetical that people on the Internet are talking about lately,” Annabeth explained. “If you were alone in the forest, would you feel more scared coming across a man you don't know, or a bear? Women keep choosing the bear, and men keep getting angry because they don't understand why.”

“Oh, alright. That's really interesting.”

“Yeah,” Piper said. “It kind of…puts into perspective how much more afraid women are of men than men realize we are.”

“That's definitely true.” Hazel tapped her fingers on the arm of her chair. “I actually would rather be alone with a bear than a strange man. That's crazy. Like you said,” Hazel looked over at Piper, “the worst the bear would do is kill me. And even then, just because it thinks I’m either food or a threat. It won't hurt me just because it wants to.”

Annabeth observed Frank, who was sitting next to Hazel. He’d been quiet, maybe afraid he’d say something insensitive on accident, like Jason had. The thought made Annabeth like him even more than she already did. His expression, listening to Hazel talk about her fears, was full of sympathy and worry.

“That's terrifying,” he said finally. “Is that something you guys think about all the time?” He glanced at Piper and Annabeth.

“We have to,” Piper said with a dejected shrug.

“She's right,” Annabeth agreed. “If we don't stay cautious, bad things happen. You know how many horrible things happen to women in Greek and Roman stories. The tricking, the violence, the blame getting pushed onto the women for mens’ bad behavior or mistakes.”

“Yeah,” Percy said. “Dark times.”

“But those things still happen,” Annabeth continued. “The specifics change, but…humans don't, really.”

The demigods were quiet for a moment. The only thing disturbing the silence was the cool breeze rattling the porch’s wind chimes.

“For what it's worth,” Hazel said, “I’d choose to be with any of you boys in the woods, over a bear.”

“Aw, shucks, Hazel,” Leo grinned. “That is high praise.”

Frank kissed his girlfriend’s hand like they were an old married couple. Percy was smiling the cutest smile Annabeth had ever seen—besides the one he’d given her at the picnic table after their first proper kiss. His cheeks were pink. Jason blushed and smiled, too, a little uncertain.

A genuine compliment from Hazel Levesque could make anyone’s day, Annabeth supposed.

“Hazel’s right,” Piper said, “after all we’ve been through together, I’d trust each one of you guys with my life. Even Leo, I guess,” she teased.

“Hey, now!” Leo said indignantly.

Piper laughed.

“Same here,” Annabeth agreed. “Despite how annoying or ignorant some of you can be,” she said in Leo and Jason’s direction with a playful smile, “you guys are alright.”

[olive-fics]

⸸ .Pointed Passion. ⸸

Not proof read (ofc),SFW,Nerd/Loser Ellie.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Ellie was a neighborhood ‘friend’ (mostly just an acquaintance to you since she was kind of weird..) You were invited over for some shitty Barbecue with your parents and Ellie’s 'dad', Joel. Ellie being the only person around your age you decided to hang out with her, even though you’d much rather just talk with some old lady in the backyard about what she saw on CBS or how her cats are doing..

You sat on Ellie's bed quietly as she showed off all of her knives, deeply explaining on which does what and how each work.

"It’s actually different because this one has these grooves- Are you even listening??” Ellie asked through the sound of shitty country music and laughter from the backyard.

The truth was,you were at first but it got tiring, real fast.

“Yeah but like.. They all look the same..Like a shaft then a blade. Duh..”

“They’re all different! Don’t you see?! The bowie knives are longer and have better grip, these switchblades are shorter and more concealable. This ones the only one with a serrated blade! Do you need me to make it any more simpler?!”

You stayed quiet,wanting to laugh at her anger and how easy she got upset over her knives but you stayed calm and silent so she didn’t stab you or something..

“Uh..and serrated means..?” You felt somewhat dumb for asking, but you knew she would tell you regardless of hating your guts right now.

“It means the teeth on the blade make it more effective at cutting through flesh, but also if it’s not sharp enough it can jam. So, depending on what I’m gonna cut, either the switchblade or the Bowie knife would be the best option. It’s not as simple as you think..”

“Mhmm..okay.. well uh..why do you have so many anyways..?”

“Why do people collect stamps? Or coins? It's the hobby I happen to have.” Ellie snapped at you making you laugh quietly..

“Alright then..and..why don’t you like my rocks??” you laughed slightly trying to ease the moment so Ellie didn’t explode.

“You’re not seriously comparing your little rock collection to my knife collection are you? Rocks don’t kill people.” Ellie snapped back.

“And stamps do..?” Your tone was teasing, referring to her last point on 'stupid' stamp collections.

“Don’t get smart with me. My collection is useful, yours is just..rocks.” Ellie mumbled,she could feel her palms getting clammy and her voice trembling in anger.

“Are you getting upset Ellie?” You laughed at her and scoffed.

“..what?! No. I’m not upset-..do I look upset..?”

“yes. Alright.. then.. I’m getting a hotdog."

You started to leave Ellie’s room to go down to the backyard to try and leave this awkward situation..

“..H-Hey! Wait for me! I want a hotdog too!”

Ellie hops off the bed and followed you after shuffling to put her knife away and regaining her composure.

“Copycat..” You laughed at her for following you.

Ellie pushed you a bit and scoffed, “Whatever. Maybe I’m just hungry..The world doesn’t revolve around you y’know?”

“Jesus, are you always an asshole? Maybe that’s why you don’t have many friends.”

Ellie pushed you out of the way snatching your hotdog plate and storming off to her room angrily.

“Okayy then.” You rolled your eyes at her and sat outside on one of the fold up chairs by the fire.

. . . 

Sitting outside with the elders made you just as bored,you couldn’t wait to go home and just sleep everything off. Getting so bored though made you doze off in your seat and take a small nap next to the fire in the crisp breeze.

Ellie couldn’t help but glance small looks at you in your sleep, how could she not.. She liked the way the fire had a soft orange glow on your face, the way your hair moved so slightly in the breeze, How your nose and cheeks were a soft pink from the air getting colder.. Ellie noticed the temperature dropping the later it got, she couldn’t leave you asleep out there in the dark so Ellie decided to use all her might and pick you up, draping you over her shoulders like a kid, trying not to wake you.

“Huh..? Dad..that you..?” You mumbled being disrupted from sleep.

"It's Ellie." Ellie whispered, her voice barely above a murmur laying you down into her bed carefully..Her hands tracing soft patterns on your arms and the marks on your body..

She covered you with a warm blanket, tucking it around your shoulders with care. The touch of her fingers against your skin sent shivers down your spine..

She glanced at your face, her heart racing as she saw the slight confusion and sleepiness in your eyes.. "You fell asleep out there, and it's freezing..I couldn't just let you freeze to death out there.. Just thought I'd make you comfy.." Ellie spoke quietly with a gentle smile.

"You're too kind." You yawned and snuggled up into her bed reaching to hold her hand gently.

Ellie froze and let everything happen, she stood there and rubbed your hand gently and getting into her bed next to you.

"You..want to watch anything..?" Ellie whispered to you, barely awake.

"mm..n..no.." You mumbled quietly, leaning into Ellie's chest and closing your eyes..

Ellie took her hands and ran then through your hair massaging your scalp gently till you were fully asleep.

"Goodnight doll."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

okkk...Sorry I know this sucks. Ive had this in my drafts for at least 3 months now. Maybe I'll re-write it idk.. LOL

Sorry for being on a small break I've had like no ideas for fics so if you want anything specific use my Anonymous request thingy and I'll answer it if it's SFW. <3

[kittyamore0]

Slashers find out their S/O has killed:

[Part 2]

A/n: IM SO UPSET BECAUSE I DONT HAVE MY REGULAR FONTS 😭 😔 A/n: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH A:n: I COULDVE JUST COPIED AND PASTED OFF THE INTERNET BUT IM TOO LAZY TO RE DO EVERYTHING 😖

CW: Murders, Sexual themes and GN! Reader.

Little note: I was going to add Lester and Bo to part 2 but I was busy while making this so I have to add them in part 3

Billy Lenz 🎄🎅📞

He’s more excited at the fact that you’re just like him, crazy!

He instantly got aroused 😃

Definitely stole some of your underwear’s (or bras) and returned them all sticky, and damp…

the way he found out was when you helped him kill Jess

”Jess, [Name], the caller is in the house,”

but you knew that

you’ve always known

so when Jess started panicking, you found it a good time to surprise her and Billy

It frightened you when she had a weapon, she could’ve killed your Billy!

So, you took the other fire poker

you stabbed Jess in the shoulder when she got dragged by Billy

I cackled when Billy yanked her hair through the stairs railing 💀

And before she could react, you slit her throat

“it’s okay, Billy,”

damn, you were always hot, but with blood on you? 😍

“[Name] saved filthy Billy…?”

you’re smart ass pinned it on Peters and he got arrested

you sneaking back to the sorority house to see Billy - 🏡 ⬅️ 🏃‍♀️💨

Tiffany Valentines 👰‍♀️❤️🧸

[this goes for her human body and doll body]

She honestly wouldn’t care, you kill, she kills, you’re even hotter when you kill.

wait, wha-

she finds it adorable and hot of you when you kill

will literally pull up a soft chair, some snacks and a face mask and sit there watching you take your anger out

“Go baby!”

”You got this, hun’!”

“They went that way!”

“Good job, woo!”

Very supportive

you were a killer when you met her

That’s how she fell in love with you!

“How many people have you killed?”

“34,”

“Hey, you know, you’re kinda cute…”

”I know,”

fell in love with you instantly.

Carrie White 🔥👩‍🎓🩸

You never kept it a secret from her, but instead of telling her that it’s innocent people, you told her that it was people that use to mock and taunt you

she doesn’t think it’s okay, but because it’s you and because they were ‘awful’ people, she pushed it away

also doesn’t judge because she did kill people with her powers, but in her defense, she was so pissed

Also accepts you because you helped her run away from her abusive mom.

every time you come home from committing mass murder, she already sets up a bath and tries to cook

her mom didn’t care about her, so she’s only learning how to cook just now

hey, at least she’s trying 🥰

you end up cooking, but she repays you with nice cuddles after !

Jennifer Check ☆💉🩸

how you met was…interesting…

you always had a crush on her

and would always get pissed whenever some boy or girl hit on her

so when someone flirting with her actually kissed her cheek

you lost it.

let’s say that they didn’t have their happily ever after

when she found out, she became infatuated with you

a really devoted, smart, and pretty/handsome person? Sign her up

she definitely confessed first

like Tiff, she also doesn’t care

you kill anyone, she kills boys, no exception

and if you’re a boy, you’re an exception

will cheer you on as well

just more lazily than Tiff

After your killings, she’ll invite you to a lake

you obviously say yes, not thinking too much of it

until you see her naked in the murky waters

definitely pushes you in

mocks you for how flustered you get

yall definitely had a good time 😏

Vincent Sinclair 🕯️🔪🔥

Vinny just finished working and he was looking for you.

a bit worried when he couldn’t find you

then he heard footsteps, your foot steps.

don’t ask me how he knows your specific footsteps

and Jesus, you were a literal bloody mess

you had about 4 limp, lifeless victims

“Vin-ny!~”

you were awfully happy

blushed a little when you happily sung out the syllables to his nickname

pointed to the 4 bodies

“well, I’d thought I’d help you with work and it’s a thank you, for um, uh, everything…”

the silence was loud

really loud

but he nodded and huffed

making you plaster a grin on your face

he’s definitely blushing under hat mask

big bear hugs after work ! ❦