#Fire me???
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THIS IS WHY WE DON'T TELL PEOPLE AT WORK THAT YOU KNOW HOW TO PICK LOCKS NOOOOOOOOOO-
#my boss overheard and i didn't know they were there#i#am embarrassed......#but what can they do#fire me???#sometimes i cringe at my eagerness to talk about my hobbies
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Okay so I'm a security guard, right
And part of why I like my job is cause I'm pretty good at deescalating conflicts without violence or police involvement
And that *might* be because my primary coping mechanism for stress is humor, and if the guy in the uniform isn't stressed out, usually nobody else is either
But anyhow today I witnessed a crime, which 911 had already been called for
And I'm telling the guy, you know, as he's running away, that nobody's gonna touch him, we don't do that here, I don't have any weapons and he can totally walk on out if he wants to
And he gives me this 'go-fuck-yourself" type answer, right? As you do
And I fucking
I fucking. Start danCING
I DONT KNOW WHY
I WAS JUST LIKE "aight guess I'll go fuck myself then, cheerio" AND START FUCKING DANCING
LIKE MY BRAIN WAS LIKE "Cool not being attacked, gotta keep the witnessed calm, gotta stay chill and breezy" AND THE PHYSICAL RESPONSE FOR THAT WAS TO SYART DOING THIS SASSY FUCKING JIG
I DIDNT EVEN REALIZR I WAS FDOUNG IT UNTIL SOMEONE POIU TED IT OUT AFTER
and it all ended fine and the dude is in custody and I get a call from my boss like "Yeah we're gonna need to send footage to police"
AND
FUCKING
THIS IS GOING TO BE SHOWN IN COURT SOMEWHERE
IM DOUNG A SRUPID LITTLE DANCE ON CAMERA AS THIS GUY LOSES HIS MIND AND ITS GONNA BE ON COURT SOMEWHERW
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST FUCKING THING IVE WVER DONE
I HATE MYSELFD
#Details changed for privacy reasons obvs#But Jesus Fucking Christ#I saw the video I look like an idiot#Please Jesus God don't fucking fire me#Teablart#Well guys it's been nice I guess#Time to die in a hole
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RIP David Lynch (1946-2025)
#David Lynch#Fire walk with me#Dune#Mulholland drive#Twin peaks#Blue velvet#Lost Highway#Wild at heart
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Poorly drawn Turtwig line
#I DON' WANNA DRAW THE FIRE ONE#AWHAHAWWWUWAAWUAW#Apes/humaniods are just difficult for me to draw in the style wheuaeaaee#my art#pokemon#Turtwig#Grotle#Torterra#[Poorly drawn Pokedex]
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No but the Hunger Games really said "what do you hate more- the atrocities or the people who commit them against you? Because like it or not there IS a difference. If you hate the people who commit acts of pure evil more than you hate the acts themselves, what will stop you from becoming just like your enemies in your pursuit of justice? What will keep you from commiting those very same acts against THEM when the opportunity arises? And what then? The cycle of pain and suffering will never stop. Round and round it'll go. Nothing will ever change. But. BUT. If you hate the atrocities. If you hate the vile, senseless acts MORE than you hate the people who did them to you. If you are able to see that evil is evil regardless of who does it... The cycle ends with you. No, you may never get justice. But you will never be responsible for making others, even your enemies, suffer the same crimes you have. The atrocities will never be committed by you, never by your hand. And that's the way you change the world. It's the ONLY way" and that's why I am sure it will never stop being one of the most relevant works of fiction ever created
#the hunger games#thg#suzanne collins#katniss everdeen#peeta mellark#catching fire#mockingjay#“i hate my enemies for what they did but i refuse to become like them”#← one of the most difficult stances to take but nonetheless worthwhile#my boy peeta knew what was up#current events got me thinking
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welcome to the world
#crowcraft#dc#kon el#superboy#so many ideas for the tube exit#I KNOW this isn’t how it happened but let me have this. I have things I think about and art is how I get them out before they eat me#this one’s about the moments of dazed confusion. he’d never even felt AIR before do you ever think about that. I think about that all the t#how strange would it be to Know so many things without having experienced them#the few seconds of disconnect here. his brain is firing all his knowledge and a startup ‘hello world’ sequence#but he’s never FELT. ANYTHING before#conner kent#so many strange sensations before it clicks as a ‘huh. so this is air. this is breathing this is thinking this is seeing hearing smelling-‘#ETC. sure babies do this but babies can’t remember shit#IDKK. I JUST THINK AHOUT IT A LOT
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LINKTOBER DAY 7: goron hot springs!
Link and zelda are sent to death mountain to “deal with the problem” via Purah. Yunobo is tired.
(Recasting Death Mountain to be slightly on fire! I love it when things are on fire.)
More of my zelda au here! (It’s totk without the time travel)
My patreon’s here if youd like to support my crimes :0
#critdraws#familiar familiar au#lonks diary#art#botw#zelda#link#breath of the wild au#tears of the kingdom au#tears of the kingdom#breath of the wild#death mountain#gorons#yunobo#goron#totk au#totk#botw au#totk link#totk zelda#botw link#botw zelda#linda (its the new zelink tag trust me)#anyways what if i set death mtn back on fire and gave it floating rocks#totk did the eldin region and the goron story line a dirty#legend of zelda#loz#tloz#the legend of zelda#tw swearing
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69 + personal delulu
#the hunger games au?#its a coping mechanism believe me#but tbh while reading gtn I periodically remembered catching fire…god….i miss thg#tlt#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#gideon nav#harrow nonagesimus#palamedes sextus#dulcinea septimus#camilla hect#griddlehark#fan art
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"You're too big for that now, sweetling."
Dany and Viserion portrait because I miss my girls
#daenerys targaryen#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf#viserion#game of thrones#daenerys stormborn#asoiaf fanart#illustration#hi it's me again#my art#october/2024
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David Lynch, selected paintings and lithographs.
“When I’m not painting, I’m thinking about painting.”-David
#art inspo#david lynch#dark art#dark artist#dark and moody#dark and beautiful#twin peaks#fire walk with me#twin peaks fire walk with me#laura palmer#wild at heart#the straight story#blue velvet#inland empire#mulholland drive#eraserhead#the elephant man#the art life
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Day 15: Spark
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#jorm scribs#inktober#october24#fullmetal alchemist#fma#fma: brotherhood#fma brotherhood#fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood#roy mustang#fmab#fma fanart#fma art#I missed october 3rd so I wanted to make up for it a bit#It's one of my top 5 anime/manga ever so it's about time i did some proper fanart#the fire fought me a bit but I'm very happy with the rest of this#flame alchemist
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i love laura palmer
#laura palmer#twin peaks#twin peaks fire walk with me#twin peaks spoilers#fire walk with me#meanwhile#david lynch#audrey horne#dale cooper#special agent dale cooper#shelly johnson#mark frost#twin peaks the missing pieces#stars hollow#fall aesthetic#funny memes#lynchian#the secret diary of laura palmer#just girly thoughts#just girly things#you like your girls insane#tumblr girls#girlblogging#girl blogging#female hysteria#female manipulator#female experience#girl blogger#girl interrupted#girls icons
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a smile so rare, it counts as a disguise :)
#one piece#luffy#trafalgar law#lulaw#honestly the marines would probably just fire anyway but oh well#i saw a pic of law smiling when he was a kid and it made me lose it#actually my work day made me lose it. but drawing this kept me together#sorry all i draw is lulaw anymore 😬
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This is like if Mona Lisa posed in-front of the Mona Lisa holding a copy of the Mona Lisa…
#sheryl Lee#laura palmer#twin peaks#fire walk with me#twin peaks fwwm#david lynch#kyle maclachlan#dale cooper#special agent dale cooper#twin peaks autumn#80s#90s#movies#film
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randoms
#messyr#2nd pic is bc of the post i did in tiktok and apparently the comment section was set on fire#and majority of em are russian ultrakill that were just spreading hate on it lol. I love both media!! theyre both cool!!!!!!#it's just a drawing. leave me alone!!#doodle#artists on tumblr#murder drones#ultrakill#ultrakill v1#v1 ultrakill#md nuzi#nuzi#murder drones n#murder drones uzi#serial designation n#uzi doorman
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