#Finding hope

[nescaveckwriter]

Finding Hope - Warnings, Bruises & Apologies (Part 2) 🩷

Prompt: Bruises - will be in bold,😱

A/N: YAY! My second one for @badthingshappenbingo 🤭, I'm pretty excited about this chapter, it is one heck of a rollercoaster, 😋 buckle up babes😱

Warnings: 18+ Only! Some language, blood and gore, normal Criminal Minds stuff, going into depth off crime scenes etc, anything else I missed let me know💕

Characters: Aaron Hotchner, Dr. Spencer Reid, Penelope Garcia, Derek Morgan, JJ, Emily Prentiss, Meredith Lang.

Cover: Created by me. Also images from Pinterest and Canva.

Words:2589 😅

Chapter Name: Warnings, Bruises & Apologies (Part Two)

"In my office now!" His voice fills the space ,anger and irritation evident. Knowing she'll probably be yelled at, she walks in. He barely looked at her "Close the door now!" Doing as he asked, standing in front of the tall dark haired man, with his cold expression. 

"Agent Lang!" He clears his throat.

"Sir?" Holding her breath 

"What the hell, were you thinking"

"Sir I..." Getting interrupted by Hotch. "Did I say you could speak, I'm not done" just nodding her head, keeping quiet.

He looks at the woman in front of him, trying to remain calm, but struggling. "You have disobeyed a direct order, you have put yourself in danger, you have .." 

Interrupting him "Listen Sir, I just did what I needed to do, if I haven't followed him, he would have killed his ex wife"

His fist hitting the desk, "Agent Lang, you could have gotten yourself killed, we were still busy profiling the suspect and you just went ahead on your own"

"Sir, I just had a feeling it was the construction worker"

"A feeling, a hunch, you're an Agent you work with evidence..." His nostrils flared.

Her green eyes pierced his "look if I hadn't showed up that 6 month old baby boy, would've grown up never knowing his mother, so yeah, I'm not sorry"

He glared at the short woman "Your not sorry? If we hadn't shown up, you ... You could have been gravely injured, the unsub were beating you with a damn hammer"

"I'll admit that he did, but at least he didn't get to kill his intended victim" she gets cut off.

"Are you even listening? I want a detailed report on my desk first thing in the morning, and this" pointing his finger towards her "this is your first warning, your a loose cannon, Agent Lang, get your act together, you need to do better" he shows to the door "close the door behind you" she didn't back down,she didn’t apologise, no she just walked out with the same damn confidence she entered his life.

Running his hand over his face, sighing this woman is different from most agents he worked with. A hunch? Where have you ever heard of such a thing? He needs to find out more about her, opening his laptop he starts to search for her file.

As she walked through the door, the emotion caught in her throat, she was filled with anger, sadness and fear, towards Aaron Hotch who just yelled at her, towards the suspect who almost had overpowered her, beating her, pinching the bridge of her nose, trying to get the image, the feeling of herself feeling so weak, so fragile in that moment out of her mind.

Plunging down to her chair, inhaling some air, closing her eyes, for a mere second, wanting to kick herself for messing up, if only she weren't this impulsive, if only she could listen to authority better, if only she could follow commands, if only, if only, her palm hitting the edge of the desk, muttering to herself "my whole damn life has been a what if"

The 6ft3 man stood behind her, cup of steaming hot camomile tea in his hand, wondering what ever could she mean by that, he knew what she's done, was irresponsible, and Hotch had a good reason for being angry, but something about her, makes him want to console her, maybe comfort her. He began to speak. "Edi?"

Her eyes opened, turning in her chair looking up at him, "Dr. Reid, can I help you?"

He smiles, "please just Spencer is fine" handing her the cup of tea "Camomile tea is known  for its relaxing properties and it being a mild sedative, helps to calm you down both physically and mentally"

Smiling "Thank you Spencer, I really appreciate it, your so kind, I thought the whole team is angry with me"

Removing his hair out of his face, "Oh no, most of them have gone home, they'll be fine tomorrow" clearing his throat "I don't think they're well ... What you did wasn’t right, but I get why you did it"

Taking a sip of the tea "Thank you so much, I just... Well no one listened when I told them it was him" 

"What made you so sure?" 

Sighing "It was the way he looked at me... Like he was surprised I saw him, you know that I was actually seeing him, in the midst of the people, it's like he was amazed that he wasn't invisible so too say"

Spencer smiles "Oh I see... You said on the plane, that he fits in, but his invisible enough to not be seen" 

Tying her hair into a ponytail, "Yeah well, not that my boss sees that point of view" 

"He just doesn't like it if one of his team members put themselves in danger" 

Before she could reply, Hotch walked out of the office, his voice stern as he looked at them "Go home get some rest"

Without saying a word, she got up, mouthing a good night to Spencer, not even looking at Hotch, as she walked out. 

Aaron watched her as she walked away without even saying anything, he sighed, looked at Reid, "Don't say it" he said, sounding sort of defeated. 

She got into her car, turned the key, but nothing happened. It didn't start, she sounded a slightly crude "Stupid piece of junk" her eyes started to water, unsure if it was due to the pain or the events that happened. Hands clenching the steering wheel, her eyes closed, trying to reclaim her 'cool nothing can get me down' composure. 

The knocking on the car window scared the crap out of her, she jolted her head to the side, it was dark and she couldn't quite see who the figure was. Her hands instinctively reached for her gun, she rolled the window down. The figure lowered down, his deep voice "Agent Lang, need some help?"

She flinched when she saw that it was Hotch, "No thank you" 

He smirked "It's a little after midnight, let me just help you, I'll take you home" 

Sarcastically "I don't get into car's with strangers"

He couldn't help it, he chuckled, "Oh so you only get on planes with strangers?" 

It was her turn to smile a little, "I know you think that was a great comeback but it was terrible"

Scratching the back of his head "True... But let me give you a ride home!" 

She felt tired and her body was aching, she mumbled "Thank you"

They got into his SUV, she didn't say much other than giving him her address, well to be honest the tension between them was tight and uncomfortable. He broke the silence when they parked In Front of her apartment, "I'm sorry, I lost my cool with you earlier but..." The way she looked at him right now, made him feel like the bad guy. He went back to his profession demeanour "but don't do it again" 

She just looked at him, simply nodded and thanked him for the ride, got out of his car, grabbed her bag, and smiled "have a good night Boss".

He saw the way she flinched when she picked up her bag. The medics at the scene checked her out, but something tells him that she wasn't entirely truthful about her injuries. He absolutely hates that he can't profile her yet and the fact that her file is sealed even with his clearance drives him crazy, he's always been a man who needed to be in control. He watched as she disappeared into her apartment and then he started driving off, thinking he'll contact one of his old colleagues who is higher up in the Bureau to see if he can't access her files.

She walked into her apartment, letting out a breath that she didn't even know she was holding in. Threw her bag to the ground, kicked out her shoes, took off her FBI jacket, tossed it over a nearby chair, walking towards her bedroom.

Her body was aching, her mind racing, the events playing over and over. She ran a hot bubble bath, with some Epsom salts, to ease the pain a little, her clothes fell to the ground, the steam in the bathroom set a calming atmosphere, the hot water drenching her skin, easing the soreness. Her head resting on the rim of the bathtub, her body soaking in the hot water, her fingers swirling through the soapy bubbles. For the first time in almost 72 hours it felt like she could breathe.

What seemed like hours, she finally got enough courage to get out, she stood there in front of the mirror, her body was filled with bruises of the hammer Blow's, some dark purple, and other spots, you could see the blood underneath the bruised skin, letting out a sigh as she gets dressed in her pyjama bottoms, and a tank top, she climbed into bed, hoping, that she could get a good night's rest, or rather a few hours of sleep before work. Struggling to get a comfortable position she finally fell asleep at 3 in the morning.

 "NO! Drop the weapon now!" She spoke in a stern voice. The man glared at her with rage. Shouting "Why? Why did you come here, how did you know?"

She looked at him calmly, holding her gun in her hand, "listen, I know your wife hurt you when she chose him” tilting her head towards the beaten up man, lying in a pool of his own blood "but this, what you're doing, is not going to make you feel better". 

He laughed, "what do you know about heartache?" Holding his ex-wife in a tight grip, already half-beaten to death, her breathing slow, her head hanging, he gripped her even tighter, pulling the hammer away to get more force on the next blow. "She ruined my life!" 

Holstering her gun, throwing her hands in the air, shifting her stance, bit more, analysing the situation it was now or never, she needed to do something immediately. She ran towards him, kicking him in the face, the poor beaten woman stumbled to the ground, but the unsub just staggered a few steps backwards, she tried to get the poor woman out of danger, that's when she felt the first blow, to her back, then her kidneys, then between her shoulder blades, she turned around, her balled fist meeting his ribs, the man was heavy build, and much larger than what she was, not being able to reach his face, he didn't even move an inch, he reached out and gripped her throat, lifting her , her feet tangling mid air, the hammer blows kept coming, each blow added more pain, her breathing became more and more restricted, that's when she heard the deafening sound of the gunshot, as the man came to a fall so did she, through her blurry vision she saw that Derek fired the weapon.

She woke up, sweat on her forehead, heart racing, her breathing rapid, she clenched her fist, her throat felt tight, closing and reopening her eyes again, she hadn't felt this way in a very long time. Running her hand through her hair, wiping the sweat from her furrowed brows. Glancing over at the digital clock, 04:00, mumbling underneath her breath "Great, a whole hour of sleep," she got out, feeling stiff and in incredible pain, she walked to the kitchen, for some coffee.

He walked into his office, sat down in his chair, he lived for these early mornings, no one to disturb him at work, chuckling down his coffee, placing his fomo cup down, the file caught his attention, he opened it, it's the typed out report  from Edi Lang. Confused, it's not even 7 in the morning yet, and he dropped her off last night, so what, how did it end up on his desk, he didn't see her when he got in. He got up and walked over to her desk, she wasn’t there, so he walked to the kitchen, then he walked into the hallway, he heard some heavy breathing coming from the gym. When he walked in, his eyes widened, it was Edi, she was busy working out.

His eyes lingered on her body, maybe a little to long, she was fit, muscular even, the outline of her body was enough to make any man look a little longer than he should, her dark hair was tied up, exposing her neckline, but what really drew his attention was the bruises on her body, she wore a sports top, which exposed the skin on her abs and back, he flinched, his jaw clenched ,he was furious at the moment, why the hell is she throwing punches and kicking and exercising, while she’s so hurt?. He walked towards her, his eyes even darker than usual, he placed a hand on her shoulder, which he rather shouldn’t have done, because she threw a jab right to his lip, he was in total shock as he staggered a bit back.

Panting now “What the hell?” she yelled at him out of breath, “are you crazy?” 

He wiped the few drops of blood off his busted lip, “Am I crazy? You just punched me out of nowhere”

Wiping the sweat off her forehead, “well you should know better than approach someone from the back, dammit”

He was slightly amused by her, but of course he didn’t show it. He was her boss so he kept his professional demeanour. “Well all I wanted to say is, should you be working out while you're so hurt?” 

Smirking “I need to be better, get my act together, and try not to punch my boss for being a…” she paused, not wanting to upset him further, “you know what nevermind”

He glared at her, he knew exactly where that sentence was headed “you don’t do well with authority do you? Already knowing the answer to that, he looked her dead in the eyes.

She grabbed the nearest towel she could find, dabbing the sweat off of her skin. “Look sir, what I do outside office hours, is my problem not yours” she walked past him, to get to her bag, but he grabbed a hold of her arm, he was about to say something, but her voice sounded somewhere between stern and brittle “touch me again, and a busted lip will be the least of your problems” shaking her arm out of his grip.

He was stunned at that reaction, he was sure, his hand wasn’t that firmly on her. Arm, he felt bad, horrible even, all he wanted to do is stop her, and tell her she should maybe see a doctor again. She threw on a t-shirt and walked out of the gym. He needed to know exactly what it is about this woman that has him so intrigued, she was one hell of mystery that’s for sure.

During the day he watched her, she had this joyful personality when she spoke to some of the other people or her co-workers, he did notice that she formed bonds, rather quickly with Garcia and Reid, he waited in anticipation for his old colleague to send over her uncensored file. When that email notification pinged, he clicked on it, his eyes went through the pages, his breathing hitched as he read it…  

@jackles010378 @k-slla @winchesterwild78 @bookishtheaterlover7 @angelbabyyy99 @pia-bartolini

[lizzle-the-edu-gamer]

Chapter 7 of Living in B Minor is up.

Crescendo!

If you've wanted to read some more My Hero Academia fic and like the idea of Shinsou and Monoma as a pair, try on this story filled with hurt, comfort, and a little (lot?) a bit of classical music.

As we reach the climax, the fateful night that indefinitely changed Monoma is revealed as Shinsou seeks him out to help him through one of the toughest days Monoma has been trying to hide from.

Lots of sad, with a touch of sweet.

[curatedbyondrea]

Although the elections did not go as I hoped I feel rejuvenated in my desire to continue spreading love and care to my fellow neighbor. The election can’t take away my impact on my community, the smile I share with a person at the grocery store, the encouragement I give to a friend, or the compassion I give to a stranger. Alas it is on me to make my version of “make America great again”.

[justahopelessssromantic]

Finding Hope (Mayans MC Fic)

Hey guys it's been a minute, more like four years yikes 😬. I've thought about this story through the years, it's always held a special place in my heart and recently after reading the first three chapters and some of the wips I had for the sorry I got a little spark to pick it back up and try again.

Now I don't know how well this is going to go, how far I might get in the story (although I really hope I can keep momentum on it 🤞🏻) or if I ever know how to write anymore. I have some off and on the past few years but it hasn't been the same as when I first started but I'm hoping things can be better going forward but anyway I'm rambling some when the point is I hope to bring this story back to life and tagging all the blogs I could find still that were on the tag list for the story in case any of you are still interested in the story. If not no big deal but I would love it if you are interested if you could comment on this post or send a message if you want to be tagged and if I don't get a message I will remove you from the tag list for future posts.

I hope you all have been doing well 😊 I've missed writing and the community it brought me too and all of you and am forever grateful for your support in the past ❤️

@jad3djay @carlaangel86 @starrynite7114 @knowles-morgan @woahitslucyylu @everyhowlmarksthedead @brothersofmayhem @vsfavs @scuzmunkie @chibsytelford @blessedboo @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @toni9 @briana-mishell24 @sammskellington

[soulinkpoetry]

Dreamers know where to look and it’s not the ground, but the sky. They hold their head up high because they know the stars hold all the hope they’re seeking.

.

. #are you a dreamer?

.

.

[for-narnia-and-the-north]

Hey…. Hey you,

The one sitting in the corner watching the world pass by.

I know that look. I know that face. I know the posture of someone staring into the mirror and seeing the void stare back.

I know how hard bad days can be. I know how dark it gets, when it feels like the physical sunshine is blocked by your hopelessness. I know the pain of holding back your tears until you’re alone, when they burst out with such raw emotion it hurts your chest.

I know the thoughts that run through your mind as you pass a sharp object. I know the inexplicable guilt and shame that comes with someone seeing your scars. I know the need to feel something, anything, to know you’re still alive.

I need you to hear me,

I see you.

Somewhere out there in the wide world is a person, who’s seen similar storms. Somewhere out there in the wide world is a person whose scars match yours.

You’re not alone, and I’m not the only one like you. There are millions who’ve walked this road before, and are walking it now with us.

Are you going to lay down and watch them as they travel the road to hope? If you want to sit in the ditch and turn your back on life, I won’t stop you, you have that right.

But if you decide you want to see what’s around the bend, I’ll go with you.

Here, take my hand.

Let me dry your tears.

Let me help you get up.

Ready?

Let’s go look for tomorrow.

[abusedunicornia]

I am a writer at my core, if nothing else, I can do that, maybe

[cowardly-bread-reactor]

look at this pwwwetty duck!1!!!

[rms-writes]

Last Line Tag / Heads Up, Seven Up

tagged by @primroseprime2019 thank you!!

Last seven lines written from Finding Hope rewrite.

She analyzed him, moving in a slow circle, anticipating his next move. His face contorted with rage, and he swung. She dodged and he swung over her head. She threw a punch to his jaw, staggering him. He sent her a heated glare and dazedly swung again, barely missing her. She landed another hit on his cheek, flinching at the pain that shot through her hand and wrist. He grunted, throwing himself forward and tackling her to the ground. She vaguely heard Tyler shout something but couldn’t make it out.

@zmwrites, @eli-writes-sometimes, @the-stray-storyteller, @pen-for-sword, @blind-the-winds, @inkspellangel, @covenscribe

[nescaveckwriter]

Finding Hope - Street Corners, secrets & Comfort - Chapter 4 💕🐞

A/N: Oh wow y'all 🤗 it's been to long but life has been busy lately, with moving😅 but I'm back and got plenty of ideas, so y'all are in for a treat, I hope y'all enjoy this chapter,💞 but goodness me, as I were busy writing this, my heart were beating out of my chest😱. So sit back and enjoy. Love y'all so much.💞 Also part of @badthingshappenbingo 💕

Prompt: I'm Fine - will be in bold.😅🐞

Warnings: 18+ only please. Violence, A body, in detail description of the victim, mentions of drug, using drug, hallucinations, weapons, blood, anything else 😱 please let me know.

Words: 2643 😅

A/N: All work is mine, please do not copy my writing, but feel free to comment, like and reblog. Thank you🐞🧡

Pictures: Pinterest, Google etc.

Chapter Name: Street Corners, Secrets & Comfort.

The sweat rolls down her delicate face, it's not that the temperature spiked, no! It's simple from the scenes, no the visions, okay let's face the nightmare she had, his eyes, his cold blue eyes, eyes of steel, hardened and lifeless, unless he, watched them, she bit her lower lip, she didn't want to go there, everything is going well, at work, finally at a good place with her parents.

But what! Why now? Why all of the sudden did she had a nightmare of him again, something must've triggered it, but what! Closing her eyes, falling back on the bed, the pillows feels a little uncomfortable, and the blankets heavy, ever since that day, she'd hold onto a blanket as if it's a lifeline, like it's the one thing that saved her. She opened her eyes, sat upright rubbing her temple's, glancing at the radio clock 2:45 , 5th May... Letting out a heavy sigh, "no wonder, I feel this way" she says to no one there, it's the day, 14 years years ago, she and Hope got taken. Quickly blinking the tears away, she threw the covers off her, got off the bed, then started pacing up and down, wound up, it's days like these, she craves ecstasy so much, its happy drug, ya know .. it's the kind that puts you in another dimension, well if your fine with spiders, that is... Letting out a humourless chuckle "damn I am losing it again," walking towards the kitchen, opening the fridge door, then closing it, and opening it again, it's empty, of course its empty, got to busy to do shopping. Maybe she can go for a jog? Maybe cross that corner, to just buy one packet, just one... Glancing at the clock at 2:57, whispering to herself "if I take just one now, it takes approximately 45 minutes to start working, then I'll feel better for 3 hours, I'll be off my high by the time I have to go to work, right?".

Before she knew it, she was out by the door, hoodie on, walking down the street, crumpled up money in her hand, she sees the sketchy looking guy there, just by the corner, approaching him, the guy looked at "move, nothing to see here little girl" her emerald green eyes piercing his "a packet of 'X'" he chuckled "damn girl," he hands her the packets, and she gave him the cash. 

With trembling hands she took the packet, and practically ran back towards her flat, and up the stairs. Closed the door behind her, slid down it, pulled her hoodie down, taking the pill between her point finger and thumb... Contemplating whether she should give in to the urge or not, her phone ringing startled her, without looking at the caller ID... "H-Hello?" 

He could hear it, in her voice, she didn't sound like herself, but he ignored it, it's just a little after 3 in the morning so "we got a case!" The urgency in Aaron's voice could tell her that it was important, "see you in 10 mins" she didn't wait for him to answer, she ended the call, got up from the floor, made her way to her closet, grabbed a pair of jeans and a button up shirt , she started dressing, and put her up in a ponytail, slipping the ecstasy into her jean pocket. No, of course she'll never use it on the job, but somehow it makes her feel better knowing it is there, even if it makes her feel guilty for thinking of actually using it again. Grabbing her keys, she can't think of that now there's a case. 

As soon as she got in her little car, she checked the coordinates of the crime scene, and then adjusted the mirror, but catching a sight of herself made her wince, some days as she looked at her reflection, the only thing she saw, was the broken lonely girl, not the woman she was today. With that thought she started the car, and drove to work.

She parks at the scene, and gets out, her FBI badge hanging around her neck, walking towards the scene. It's a public park, so the grass is short and neat, and green. Instantly smiling as she the scrawny, tall man with his brownish curls, "Hey Spence,".

He looks down towards her, she's so short and friendly, she is so kind always and a good agent, he likes her, maybe a little more than he'll admit, but she's not the type of woman who'd be into a man like him, a nerd! An awkward man, who's not good with the ladies like Derek would say, he smiles "Eddie, morning" as she looked up at him, he could tell something was wrong, her emerald eyes is troubled, his very perceptive, one of his strong suits, well that and having a eidetic memory and reading 20,000 words per minute. Concern evident "you okay?"

Nodding "I'm fine". She hated it when people asked that, so she got down to business "what happened?" He could tell she was far from fine, but also she didn't want to talk about so he spoke in a more professional tone "neighbourhood watch, saw something glistening and took a closer look, a woman wrapped in cling film, there's not a single drop of blood, so it was just a dumping ground" As he enlightened her she walked closer, crouching down, looking at the girls face, young about 17 maybe 18. 

Putting on a pair of gloves, she tilted her head side to side, her thumb at her chin, she had to check, tilted her head backwards, there it is .. "no" she whispered, she saw the small incision, in the crease of her neck. She took out her knife, and cut the cling film open. She didn't wait for the forensic team, she heard Reid say something but it sounded like he was underwater... She laid there, naked exposed to the whole world to see, her fingernails filled with her own skin, scratching marks everywhere, "bastard!" She kept repeating, as she looked at her feet, there it was the small needle marks. It's him! "The Collector" all of the sudden Meredith felt sick like she was about to puke, the sinking feeling in her stomach even worse than this morning, the unshed tears burning behind her eyes.

She stumbled to her feet,  shaking and trembling, her eyes wide as she looked up at Spencer, he looked down at her "Eddie? Are you okay? You don't look so well!" She couldn't form words, the collector's face, his eyes, his voice, his smell... Her breathing became ragged, sweat trickling down her face, her chest feels tight... Spencer placed his big hands on her shoulders, he knew she was having an anxiety attack, why he didn't know, yes this scene is bad, but they've seen worse, his voice calm and soothing "just breathe, in and out". 

It took a few seconds for her to register that someone was touching her, she didn't realise it was Spencer, when she went hysterical, "NO! No! Leave ... Me ... Leave me alone!" She said between gasps. 

Spencer immediately threw his hands up in the air "It's me, Spencer" but he could tell she was somewhere else caught up in a nightmare. Honestly he never saw her like this so scared, vulnerable looking, it's like she saw a ghost. 

Just then Aaron Hotchner arrived on the scene, he didn't get very far when he saw the concerned look on Reid's face, and when he saw Lang, he took long strides towards them. He saw the trembling, in her small body, the scared look on her face, without having to know the details he knew it had to be something with her past, and all if the sudden he felt this protective fatherly urge come over him, he embraced her, yes she struggled and mumbled something, but when he whispers in his low gruff voice "I've got you, your safe" it was the sentence Gideon said to her the day they found her. 

It's like she got out of her trance and then looked up at him, softly "Gideon he...he always said that" he looked down, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips, "I know". 

As she looked at him, realising, he looked familiar not his facial features but his eyes... She pushed him away, "you... You were there, weren't you!" Before he could reply, she started to stumble backwards, “get away from me…. Get away dammit!” tears streaming down her face, mumbling “I… I can’t believe this.. No… No… this can’t be happening”.

Aaron took a slow step towards her “Meredith listen to me, it doesn’t change anything, let us help you, your family, I know you don’t trust anyone, but you can trust me, trust Reid and your team, we’ve got you”. Her breathing were ragged and everything was a blur, nothing made sense, she could barely hear the words coming out of his mouth, she looked at Spencer who stood there, with a shocked expression, confusing written over his face, and at that stage it felt like her world came crashing down, she ran towards her car, she needed to get away,she needed to wake up from this nightmare, wishing - no praying she fell asleep and this isn’t real. 

Aaron tried to talk her out of it but she quickly reversed, and sped off. Before she knew it she was at her apartment, her safe space or rather her only place where she could regain focus, a sense of balance… She ran upstairs, opening the closet, looking at the evidence board, anger evident “Why now, you bastard, why strike after all these years?” She paces up and down, papers and flies flying through the air, as she goes through all the gathered evidence. “Why now?” she repeated out loud. 

The images of that girl in the park, that could have been her, fourteen years ago, she always did feel so guilty for surviving. And now to find out her new boss Aaron Hotchner was the second agent who found her, who saw her as that broken little girl. Screaming “How the hell am I supposed to face him again, arghhhh!” she threw a punch towards the sketch of the ‘collector’s’ face. Shaking out the bloody knuckles she fell to her knees crying “why… why the hell do you have to ruin my life still, you bastard” grunting as her back hit the wall, Her hands in her hair, she hated feeling helpless, scared and damn vulnerable. She rubbed her hands together, then brought her knees to her chest, the holstered 9 millimetre,uncomfortable so she unclips it. Removing the shiny metal object, clocks it and places it down next to her.

Removing her belt with the holster, her fingers brushing against the jean pocket, remembering the pills, “yes… yes I need it” the fingers fumble with them taking two… “The hell with staying clean” she mumbles before pushing it in between her full sweetheart lips, “I’ll feel better right? I have to” mumbling waiting for the effects to take place “I need to forget, I want to forget… why can’t I forget.?”   

She sat there, trembling, crying, clenching and unclenching her fists “Please I need to feel something else” she practically begs for the drugs to work. She grunts in frustration ‘Why isn’t it work, it needs to work dammit” Looking around the room, then up at the evidence board, she tilts her head to the side, out of her closet comes a big spider, carrying on his back about a 100 little black spiders, all of the sudden it starts to crawl up her boots, to her legs towards her thighs, up to her torso, then finally covering her arms. She can feel it on her face, her body everywhere. It’s been so long that it’s scary again, there’s so many and they keep coming and coming. Big and small… so many. “Get it off me… go away…” she begs. “Go away… get it off me” she starts slapping the non-existing spiders, clawing at her arms, neck. Then came the laughter, his laughter. “No… No… Please Go away. Don’t hurt me again please. Don’t please” His face was right in front of her and she punched into the air.

Spencer walked into her apartment, the door was unlocked and he could tell something was wrong, the grunts and frustrating sounds coming from upstairs sent a chill down his spine, weapon in hand he quickly but silently went up, his long legs only catching every third step. As he entered the bedroom, papers scattered everywhere, but what really shook him, was that 5ft2 woman rocking forward and backwards like she was a trapped little child, her whimpering and begging, “Go away, leave me and Hope alone” it was a chant, a desperate, heartbreaking chant. He catches a glimpse of the service pistol next to her, and then a packet of what must’ve been drugs, she sure is strung out of her mind. 

He slowly and softly approached, his voice soothing and calm “Eddie? Hey it’s me Spencer Reid” he repeated the same sentence a few times over, before she looked up at him, her pupils blown and in a swift motion she picked up the 9 mil and pointed it in his direction, his hazel eyes widens “Eddie, please don’t do that” hysterically she shouts at him “did he send you? Are you here to take me to the chamber?” the weapon swayed. He knew he looked intimidating so he slowly crouched down on his knees and spoke softly “It’s me Spencer” softly she replied “Spencer?” he nodded a compassionate smile on his lips “It’s me, your friend remember” she lowered the gun. “S-Sorry” he looked at her and despite the fact that he doesn’t like physical touch he pulled her towards him. Snaking his long arms around her, as she kept repeating “He’s here, his here” and he just cooed “You’re safe, I’m here I won’t let anything happen to you” and he meant every single word. The way she looked up at him, with tears streaking down her freckled cheeks “promise?” that one word broke him, the way she sounded, his own voice laced with heavy emotion “yes I promise” he went to sat down, not breaking the emotional embrace in fact he might’ve pulled her closer towards his chest, and she let out a sigh as her head rested on his chest as she found comfort in this, closing her eyes as her hands gripped his arm, he didn’t mind the slight pain, she needed him and he will always be there for her.

The coroner called Aaron Hotchner over, after the autopsy of that poor girl, the coroner explained that she was drugged, malnourished with multiple broken fractures, and that all the blood was drained out of her body, with her thyroid bone missing, he also told Hotch that he found a photo in her mouth with a inscription on the back, as Hotch took the photo he recognized the blonde much older woman from the framed photo on Meredith Lang’s desk it was Hope… he turned to read the message on the back. ‘Meredith Lang, you think you’re better than me, but I know what you did, so let’s play a game. You’re the little mouse and I’m the big bad cat. I’ll pounce when you least expect it. - love The Collector.’ Aaron clenched the photo in his fist, concern on his face. Somehow Meredith feels like his daughter and he’ll make sure that this bastard will never lay a finger on her again, he whispers underneath his breath “I’m coming for you.” 

[thegratitudecoach]

Finding Hope in the Hopeless: Exploring What Hope Means

[patience-hope-strength-courage]

I realise that healing and recovery is a conscious choice, it’s not an easy one but it will always be worth it. ❤️‍🩹

[harmonyhealinghub]

Embracing the Power of Hope: A Guiding Light in Challenging Times

Shaina Tranquilino

September 18, 2023

In a world that often seems engulfed by darkness, hope emerges as a powerful beacon of light, offering solace and strength to those who choose to embrace it. It is an intangible force that ignites our spirit, propels us forward, and empowers us to believe in better days. Regardless of the circumstances we find ourselves in, hope remains steadfast, reminding us that even amidst adversity, there is always room for optimism and possibility.

The Essence of Hope:

Hope is not merely wishful thinking or blind optimism; rather, it is a deep-rooted belief that things can improve despite the current challenges. It enables us to see beyond present difficulties and envision a brighter future. Hope fuels resilience within us, allowing us to weather storms with unwavering determination and perseverance.

Finding Hope in Adversity:

While life undoubtedly presents its share of trials and tribulations, it is precisely during these trying times that hope becomes most crucial. In moments of despair and uncertainty, holding onto hope provides comfort and reassurance. Even when faced with seemingly insurmountable obstacles, hope whispers words of encouragement and reminds us that every setback can be transformed into an opportunity for growth.

The Ripple Effect of Hope:

Hope possesses an inherent ability to inspire change not only within ourselves but also among those around us. When we radiate hopefulness through our actions and attitudes, we create a domino effect that uplifts others' spirits. By embodying hope as individuals, we become catalysts for positive transformation on both personal and collective levels.

Nurturing Hope:

1. Cultivating gratitude: Gratitude acts as fertile ground for growing seeds of hope. Appreciating the blessings in our lives nurtures an optimistic outlook on the future.

2. Surrounding oneself with positivity: Surround yourself with hopeful individuals who exude positive energy. Engage in activities that bring joy and inspire creativity, fostering an environment conducive to hope.

3. Setting realistic goals: Hope thrives when we set meaningful objectives for ourselves. Breaking down larger aspirations into smaller, achievable milestones allows us to maintain a sense of progress and accomplishment.

4. Embracing resilience: Recognize setbacks as temporary roadblocks rather than permanent failures. Resilience helps us bounce back from disappointments and fuels the flame of hope within us.

Hope is not a passive state but an active choice — a decision to believe in brighter days, even when circumstances may suggest otherwise. It empowers us to rise above adversity, embrace change, and work towards building a better future. Remember that hope is a renewable resource; it can be found within ourselves and shared with others through acts of kindness and compassion. By nourishing our own wellspring of hope, together, we can illuminate the world with its transformative power.

[ashhere1]

baby it's 3am, had you on my mind it's not the first time we've been through this..🤍

[oyemaggi]

"Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful means recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciating small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familiar things we know. And maybe we're thankful for the things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate."

– Meredith Grey / On Being Grateful

[livelifeintentionally]

Depression: The Big Black Dog and My Fight to Overcome