#Figured I'd punch a few other people while I'm at it

[revenantghost]

Sometimes I think I'm okay and then I remember Trimax exists

[trippinsorrows]

through your eyes + au future

a/n: i had this idea and needed to write it. it's a bit into the future, much past where i currently am, so feel free to skip. i'm still posting the next part later this evening, but i just needed to get this out of my head and figured i'd share lol

*gif courtesy of google*

words: 1.6k // warnings: solana is sad, roman is pissed, and their families ain't shit

taglist: @fearlesschimera @sayyestoheav3nn @annfg8 @cyberdejos2 @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @trentybenty @empressdede @tshepisho @southerngirl41 @callmekayd

Solana should have listened to Roman. 

Should have known better than to ever think this was a good idea.

To think that they could have both of their families in the same vicinity and everything would go fine. Granted, the type of division she was expecting has been relatively tame. There hasn’t been any violence, largely due and thanks to the weapon deposit bins by the entrance.

Weapon free establishment and all. 

Yet, she’s not naive enough to think that the lack of guns, knives, and other unmentionables could stop her or Roman’s family from throwing down if they wanted. But, they haven’t. No punches have been thrown nor bones broken. It’s been more of a clear separation. Roman’s family only interacts with each other, and her family interacts with each other.

Not the kind of cohesion she was hoping for but a much better alternative than what it could be.

But, while conflict and violence between the in-laws has, so far, been avoided. There’s still another major issue that has Solana locked in one of the back rooms, sitting on a random chair, crying her eyes out.

The bullying. 

Towards her. 

Towards Roman.

Towards their baby.

It started out light, Solana having to politely shut down a near fight between her brother and Roman.

Wes lifted the beer to his lips, eyeing Roman. “So, how many people have you killed today, Reigns?”

“Wesley!” Solana’s sharp use of his name was conjoined with a disapproving expression. He’s too old for the petty jabs.

Roman, however, simply smiled coldly, scratching his beard as he delivered a chilling warning. “So far none, but you keep fucking talking, and I can change that real fast.”

Thankfully, Solana was able to de-escalate, her sister-in-law, Hazel, prying Wes away before any violence could commence. 

Then there was the conversation Solana unintentionally walked into while conversing with two of her older cousins she’s not as close with.

For good reasons.

“Aren’t you at all worried?”

Solana frowned. “About?”

Her cousin leaned forward, lowering her voice. “Roman as a dad. I mean, he’s not capable of love. Do you really expect him to be a good father?”

There’s no words to describe how much hearing such a thing about the man she loves hurt Solana. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Her other cousin, however, simply rolled her eyes. “I’m just saying, everyone knows that man is a sociopath. You’re better off cutting your losses now, taking the kid to Mexico with your mom’s side of the family, and praying he doesn’t turn out like his psycho dad.”

Solana had to excuse herself for that one. She had nothing nice to say in that moment, but beyond that, she just needed to get a few tears out.

And she did, hoping that would be the last of it, but no, that was just too good of a hope to be true. 

It was the comments overheard by some of Roman’s relatives, however, that did her in.

“I just can’t believe out of all the women, the respectable options who come from more established families, he chose her.”

The other woman snorted, shaking her head. “Right? It’s obvious she was looking for a sugar daddy. What is she, like 25?”

“I heard her father’s not doing well financially and told her to seek out Roman.”

“Makes sense. Look how easy she was. Didn’t waste any time opening up her legs and trapping him with a baby.” The woman rolled her eyes, adding, “at the very least, he could have found a Samoan woman. It’s bad enough he’s afakasi, but this child of theirs? The girl is Mexican and Black. He’ll hardly have any Samoan blood running through his veins. Our Bloodline could die out because of her.”

The first woman to speak snorted, smirking almost as she suggested, “that’s assuming it’s his baby. Roman’s smart though. I’m sure he’ll have a paternity test done as soon as she pushes out that bastard.”

“Assuming ICE doesn’t deport her first.”

The two women fell out in laughter at the same time Solana darted off, desperate to get away and have a safe space to cry. 

It’s all just been too much. Too much hatred spewed for something that should be filled with love and excitement. 

It’s been anything but, and it hurts. 

It hurts a ton. 

The knocking on the door is loud and borderline erratic, Solana quickly wiping her eyes and clearing her throat to inform that she’ll be out in a minute. But, a deep, familiar voice beats her to it.

“Solana.” It’s Roman, and he doesn’t sound happy. “Open the door.”

She blows out a deep breath and does her best to feign a ‘normal’ voice. “Just—just a second.”

“Now, Solana.” Before she can ask why, he adds in a calmer voice,“I know you’re crying.” Damn. 

“So you either let me in or I’ll break this goddamn door down.”

He’ll do it. She knows he will. There’s nothing ever stopping Roman from comforting or being there for her when he knows she’s upset. 

And this would definitely be one of those times. 

Solana sniffles, trying to gather herself as she carefully stands up from the toilet seat. Wiping at her eyes, she flips the lock and is barely able to turn the knob when Roman is opening the door. Stepping back, he closes it behind him and moves his hands to her face, gaze locking with hers.

“What’s wrong?”

So many things, but this isn’t the time or place, so she shakes her head. “N–nothing. I’m just—baby hormones.”

“Bullshit,” he scoffs, voice still surprisingly gentle. “Baby, talk to me. What happened?”

Solana looks away, hating how just that question, coming from him, tone so understanding and soft almost, is enough to pull the truth out of her.

And it does.

“You were right. This was a bad idea. I should have never—” She stops herself, taking a deep, shaky breath. “I just wanted…..I thought….I thought they’d be happy for us.”

“Sol, you know it’s not that simple.” Though his words could be seen as insensitive, the way he says it is anything but. “Who said what?”

She closes her eyes, grasping onto his white button-up shirt. “It wasn’t just…..one person….it’s everybody.” He wipes at her tears, as she continues to feel the emotional weight of it all. “My family saying cruel things about you—”

“Sola—”

“Your family saying things about me, about our baby—”

At that, all gentleness drops and is replaced with something else. Something she knows Roman knows well. 

Anger.

“Who?” It’s one word. One single word that means a multitude of things and none of them good.

Solana shifts her weight, shrugging, “I—I don’t know who they are. Some….some cousins of yours. But, it doesn’t—it doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does fucking matter.” Roman drops his hands from her face to instead take her right hand in his, holding it firmly. “And we gonna address this shit right now.”

Solana's eyes widen a bit. That’s….that’s not what she wanted. “Wait, Roman—”

He’s not listening though. His stride is purposeful and determined, as he leads them out the bathroom, down the hall, and into the main section of the venue where most of their families are gathered. 

Roman guides them over to where the DJ has his setup, Solana gasping as Roman uses his free hand to yank a set of chords out the wall, effectively stopping the music. 

The DJ looks just as confused as most of the guests but cowers away in fear when Roman ‘iffs’ at him, like he’s going to hit him, before snatching the microphone. 

The abrupt ending of the music has attracted most gazes to where Roman and Solana stand, him moving them to the middle where all can see and hear.

He never once releases her hand. 

“Imma say this one time, and one time only.” She swallows, her eyes landing on her parents. Her mom looks confused, while her dad wears the same expression he’s worn since the moment Solana finally came clean about her relationship with Roman.

Disappointed. 

“Cause if I have to address this shit again, it’s not gonna be verbally.” Chills move up and down her spine. There’s not an ounce of her that questions if he’s bluffing or not. Roman doesn’t bluff. If he says it, he means it. “I don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks about me. That includes her family and mine, but I’ll be damned if I let any of ya’ll disrespect her or our child.” Solana’s hand naturally moves to her belly, her bump that’s pronounced and especially visible in her white bodycon dress. “We’re together. We’re having a baby. However way any of you feel about it, keep it to your fucking selves, because there’s no reason Solana should be crying at something that’s supposed to be a happy occasion.”

She swallows, noticing how the entire room has gone silent under the deep voice of Roman’s address. There’s not a person who looks uninterested or annoyed. It’s just a sea of various scared and nervous expressions. 

“So, the next time you find yourselves talking shit about her, and especially our baby, understand it will absolutely be the last thing you ever fucking do.” Solana watches Roman begin to hand the microphone to the flabbergasted DJ before he snatches it back, turning once again toward the onlookers. “And one more thing……when you address her, make sure you do it properly.”

Solana’s throat goes dry.  She shakes her head. He can’t be doing what she thinks he’s about to do. “Roman—”

“It’s not Solana Miller.” Oh my God. “It’s Solana Reigns.”

The sea of silence quickly morphs into an ocean of various gasps, exclamations, and even shouts. 

Meanwhile, Roman simply smirks as he sticks the nail in the coffin before dropping the mic on the ground. “—we’re married.”

[reythenerdypisces]

things that I overlooked in PJO the first time / small, funny things I noticed during my reread

Part 3: The Titan's Curse

The truth was I was kind of disappointed to hear that she liked her new school so much. It was the first time she'd gone to school in New York. I'd been hoping to see her more often.

I tried to concentrate on little things, like the crepe-paper streamers and the punch bowl - anything but that fact that Annabeth was taller than me, and my hands were sweaty and probably gross, and I kept stepping on her toes.

"The General?" I asked. Then I realised I'd said it in a French accent. "I mean... who's the General?" I want this part to be in the show

"Sweet! Let's go! [to CHB]" said Nico. this breaks my heart. he was so excited in this book

Tyson thought Annabeth was just about the coolest thing since peanut butter (and he seriously loved peanut butter).

"How would you kidnap an immortal goddess? Is that even possible?" "Well, yeah. I mean, it happened to Persephone." "But she was like, the goddess of flowers." Grover looked offended. "Springtime." you tell him grover

"That's some serious danger you're facing." Connor Stoll said. (I liked how he said you and not we.) I'm just imagining the rest of the campers not bothering to go on quests cause it's always the same few demigods and they don't care, they're just chilling safe at CHB while Percy and Annabeth do their things

The creature looked at me sadly. "Moooo!" But I couldn't understand his thoughts. I only speak horse. Percy Jackson speaks two languages: English and Horse

With a shiver, I realised that five hundred or a thousand years from now, Bianca di Angelo would look exactly the same as she did today. She might be having a conversation like this with some other half blood long after I was dead but Bianca would still look twelve years old. ouch

"It wants to kill us!" Thalia said. "Of course." Grover said. "It's wild!" "So how is that a blessing?" Bianca asked.

"That's us," he said. "Those five nuts right there." "Which one is me?" I asked. "The little deformed one," Zoe suggested.

When she smiled at me, just for a moment she looked a little like Annabeth. I know everyone talks about this part but I can't help but bring it up again, they are so cute

"Woah, first of all, I never said anything about love. And second, what's up with tragic!" little does he know. also, Percy is so incredibly insightful in this book but he's also so jealous of Annabeth and Luke and so upset about the idea of her joining the hunters yet still can't figure out that he likes her

"Seven hundred feet tall," I said. "Built in the 1930s." "Five million cubic acres of water," Thalia said. Grover sighed. "Largest construction project in the United States." Zoe stared at us. "How do you know all that?" "Annabeth," I said. "She liked architecture." I cannot explain how much this little bit means to me.

The girl I'd just tried to slice in half yelped and dropped her Kleenex. "Oh my god." she shouted. "Do you always kill people when they blow their nose?" Rachel's here!!! I love her

Five minutes later, Zoe had me outfitted in a ragged flannel shirt and jeans three sizes too big, bright red sneakers, and a floppy rainbow hat. someone draw this and tag me. what an outfit

Suddenly it occurred to me: this had happened to her before. She had been cornered on Half-Blood Hill. She'd willingly given her life for her friends. But this time, she couldn't save us. How could I let that happen to her? he is the most empathetic, wholesome guy, I love Percy

"Can't this go any faster?" Thalia demanded. Zoe glared at her. "I cannot control traffic." You both sound like my mother." I said. "Shut up!" they said in unison. I kind of wish we got more Thalia and Zoe interactions... they would've made such a great enemies to lovers dynamic, if Zoe didn't die

"Get away from my daughter!" Dr Chase called down, and his machine gun burst to life, peppering the ground with bullet holes and startling the whole group of monsters into scattering. "Dad?" yelled Annabeth in disbelief.

Grover went off with his satyr friends to spread the word about our strange encounter with the magic of Pan. Within an hour, the satyrs were all running around agitated, asking where the nearest espresso bar was.

"No," I said. "I choose the prophecy. It will be about me." "Why are you saying that?" she cried. "You want to be responsible for the whole world?" It was the last thing I wanted, but I didn't say that. I knew I had to step up and claim it. "I can't let Nico be in any more danger." I said. might I remind you this boy is 13/14 and has the whole world on his shoulders (both literally at some point and figuratively)

I feel like these are just getting longer and longer but again, I will be back for part 4!

[empressgetou]

YOU'RE MINE, I'M YOURS

boyfriend senku x reader

hours after both of suika and y/n who went across to shore to the island where senku and the others were supposed to be. luckily for them ryusui managed to throw suika overboard who was cleaning the docks and y/n who was nearby the kid just in time for the petrification by a second.

y/n stayed behind the island to look for senku as suika went back to the ship to check up on the others and just as night the night falls ibarra and kirisame's group came checking up on the ship making the woman worried about the poor girl on her own in the ship.

"the lab!" echoed through the island.

i recognized that voice anywhere, kohaku! senku and the others must be near. as i look up on the side of the island there they were in a gather with a few people i don't recognized, i was about to ran up to them then i saw kohaku kissing senku...

KISSING SENKU??

i was never the type to be the "im jealous" girlfriend, even before the petrification my relationship with senku is actually great than the usual couples around. that's because he never gave me a reason to over something minor. sure, i may or may not have been a little jealous over the whole marriage thing that was set up with ruri back a few months but that was in the past and now i see this? boy you better have an explanation to this too or i might cut your–

i ran fast as i could to catch up, as i can already see the mobile lab who im assuming suika managed to drive through up to the mountains. as soon as the vehicle stopped they too have stopped their tracks and managed to spot me in my place.

"y/n! you're here! you weren't petrified?" gen asked surprisingly and his eyes went to the leek head whom im not naming.

"nahh ryusui managed to throw me into the ocean just in time with suika" i laughed a little remembering a few hours ago how pissed off i was thinking he has even the audacity to throw us like we're a rock or something but im glad ryusui did managed to save us.

"kekeke somehow i had a feeling you survived that thing though i never expected you'd be here on the island" senku already on my side and had a little smirk on. oh how i wanna punch that handsome face so bad right now.

i rolled my eyes, "course i did. m'not really and idiot ya know." i smirked back.

"good job, you two!" praised senku.

we managed to get out of the villagers hair and went to the underwater cave to hide in the meantime while we prepare in infiltrating the harem and well that includes getting kohaku ready for the act.

"the ingredients are simple!"

"honey, lemon and coconut?"

"ahhh you're making a conditioner?"

"that's ten billion points for you, my dearest!" senku pointed at me as if ive won the lottery.

"you mind leaving me some for my hair?"

and then here's amaryllis having the greatest idea i never would've thought i'd come up with. but men dressing as women? specially senku? i never thought i'd see the day.

"pftt"

"yeah, yeah laugh it while you can honey. you don't know what's coming next for ya." he said while having an obvious annoyed face.

gen however pulled it off but his height was a bit much for an average girl. then there's soyuz, yeah i dont even wanna explain how he looks. and then lastly ginro, well he passed, perfection i might add.

"well that's that. obviously we know who is coming to the harem" i said as i was about to go back to the mobile lab, kohaku spoke.

"we're not done yet y/n, you're next!" and managed to pull me to her side.

"waittt! im not–"

"no buts! come on, you're a candidate yourself if i say so myself plus we could totally infiltrate the harem without a problem if both of you and me work together inside."

"ughhh nooo i don't wanna. too much workkk"

kohaku and amaryllis managed to dress up y/n nicely and while doing so senku's eyes never left her figure and her hair specially. he realized that y/n never actually leave her hair down just like before the petrification maybe because they were always busy working back at the village it would be distracting having her long wavy hair in the way, he only saw her hair down whenever she'd take a bath by the river and whenever she would sleep beside him. amaryllis also put make up on y/n and it definitely just made her even more beautiful and vibrant much to senku's pleasure. he was falling all over again.

"looking good there", he complimented

"thanks. i thought you'd never notice", y/n sarcastically said.

"been a while since i've had make up on too. does it look weird?" she asked worriedly.

"nahh you're good. you're beautiful." he said almost whispering.

"alrightyyy y/n, you're coming with us right?", kohaku asked

"huh? but i'm not really needed there right? hehe", y/n tried to convince her friend.

before y/n and her group went to the harem selection she managed to get inside the mobile lab and talked to senku.

"so i was thinking since ya' know could be a few days or weeks before we'd succeed in the infiltration but i just wanna clarify something." fiddling her hands thinking maybe she just misunderstood what kohaku did to his boyfriend.

"yeah, got something to say before you leave me here all alone?" senku joked still doing his science work.

"i saw kohaku kissed you last night." and went silent, it made y/n think maybe she was stupid to even conclude at that idea.

"ah yeah she did"

"what! why?"

"easy tiger, that was unexpected for me as well, we have to get a distraction from the enemy. gen's fault he included me."

silence again.

"but i guess that made you uncomfortable huh?" she nodded still fiddling her fingers.

he saw this and went to holding her close.

"m'sorry if it made you feel bad, i take full responsibility of how you're feeling right now. tell you what i'll give gen an earful about that and maybe after this whole infiltration thing, we spend time more together after, hmm?" trying to apologize the woman.

"mmm, i see.."

"i understand i just want to know why it had to be done." she said faintly smiling.

"m'sorry if you understood that way. there's nothing going on. m'still yours forever and always" he tried to cheer up.

she then hugged him and he immediately reciprocated. silence engulfing them once again while enjoying the company of each other.

"i love you"

"me to honey. i love you so damn much. i'm yours. okay?" reassuring her and gently pushing his lips into her sweet candy flavored ones.

masterlist

"mmm, you're mine and i'm yours" she giggled.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not telling my partners I'm a system?

💚🐻

To preface this, I don't use Tumblr and I'm using my partner's account, so I would rather ask this anonymously. Forgive any non-tumblr-isms 😅.

This happened a while ago, but to be honest I can't let this go. I feel so horrible about it despite being reassured and I figured Tumblr, who has a lot of systems/people with DID/OSDD, would be able to give me an unbiased (as much as I can give an unbiased account, anyway) answer.

I, (24M), am a system with one headmate, P, (??). (Neither of us are sure how old he is, since it seems to change on the day). I don't want to get into exactly how I got him, but I believe the term for what we are is "traumagenic"? Sorry, again, I'm not really familiar with everything.

Anyway, I've had him since I was 8, and he's been... well, a real pain in the ass, to be frank. I understand now that he's a defender by nature and was trying to protect us, but when you get expelled from middle school for several physical attacks and almost get sent to juvie you start to resent the guy a bit. He's a bit like a sleeping bear, except if the sleeping bear had one eye open and killed you before you could hurt him.

Back when I got out of my abuser's house and went no contact at age 20, I moved in with my current partners, Bonfire (24M) and Greenhouse (25NB) (names changed for privacy, obviously.) At the time I didn't know them, but they were looking for another roommate and I desperately needed somewhere to live.

So I moved in with just the clothes on my back and my wallet (bad move, I know, but I didn't have anything anyway). I didn't care to interact with them all that much, not wanting P to get defensive and attack them for no reason, but they just kept pushing and eventually I relented and hung out with them some.

"Some" turned to "often," and then "often" turned into "sleeping-in-their-bed-and-sharing-our-clothes." At that point I was too far into it and embarrassed to admit I'd been hiding a whole other person from them in my mind. I wasn't sure if they'd even like me after, what with P's history of violence.

...so I never told them. I did my best to forget about anything that ever happened and tried to just enjoy the future I'd always wanted for myself. Bonfire and Greenhouse are lovely people and I was finally, maybe just a little happy. I'd never been a happy person and I was content to bask in it for as long as I was able.

This, of course, backfired immensely. P and I didn't have the best relationship at the time, with both of us wanting to do very extreme things to get away from the other. He wanted to kick me out and be by himself in my body, and I wanted to kill myself to be rid of him. We've since reconciled and made strides in accepting ourself for who we are- it hasn't been easy by any means, but that isn't the point.

I recognize now that he was afraid of being hurt again, not wanting to get out of that survival mindset in case Greenhouse and Bonfire turned out to be super-secret mega abusers taking advantage of our trust, but I also know what he did after was wrong.

He got physical with Bonfire, screaming at him and threatening to kill him if he got any closer. I don't have any memory of this happening, so some details may be incorrect, and I apologize for that. Bonfire, not knowing that P was not, in fact, me, (coupled with the fact that he's a fucking idiot (meant with affection)), he got closer and tried to talk me (him) down. P punched him in the face and broke his nose, after which he ran out of the house and left me to "wake up" a few miles away curled up under a tree.

P left me a note a few days later that said he didn't mean to break his (Bonfire's) nose, but that he was lucky he hadn't done worse. This, in P speak, is probably the most sincere apology I could get at the time.

To try and keep this as short as possible, I'll summarize what happened next. I told Bonfire and Greenhouse about P because at that point the cat was basically out of the bag. They said they'd wished I'd told them sooner, and that they were a little uncomfortable being in the same house as "the lean, mean, stabbing machine" (- Bonfire) but that they were willing to help me manage him if I promised to tell them everything I knew about how he worked.

I did, and it's been years since then, and now P and I are, as stated before, closer than ever. I recently asked my partners whether or not they were still upset with me for not telling them, and they just said that they weren't entitled to my medical history and trauma (which, yeah, but he did break Bonfire's nose) and that they didn't care because, "hey, we basically got a free dog out of it" (- Bonfire), and "we made a promise to love you, including all the less-than-savory parts." (- Greenhouse).

Sweet, yes, but I think I might be TA because, um, P LITERALLY BROKE BONFIRE'S NOSE AND THREATENED TO KILL HIM? AND IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN PREVENTED IF I HAD TOLD THEM?

TL;DR: I didn't tell my partners about my headmate that's prone to violence and he did violence on them and I feel bad.

AITA?

(P says hi, by the way, and he also wants me to tell you that he isn't like this anymore and much prefers soft blankets and eating fruit to breaking his family's noses.)

What are these acronyms?

[genderqueerdykes]

Heyyy so I've very much travelled across several different corners of the queer interwebs and along the way I've seen a lot of different perspectives on controversial topics that have helped me form my own opinions, but theres always been one I never really understood. Is "femboy" offensive?? Like, I've heard from, unfortunately, anyone except trans women that it's offensive to use because of the way it's used against trans woman to misgender them, but I've also heard from a lot of people that people who say that are just chronically online.

It's just bothered me because as a trans guy (one that often gets mistaken to be a trans girl by strangers, might I add) I've been on the end of people using a femboy as an insult by people who know I'm a trans guy and people who thought I was a trans girl and honestly upon further consideration..they're not wrong and I'm perfectly okay with that, but I don't know if it would be a problem to call myself a femboy so I guess I'm just looking for a second opinion. I've heard "rosboy" as an alternative but I think I'd rather punch a wall bare handed than call myself a rosboy, just doesn't feel right.

Sorry if this ask is too rambly or somehow rude :[

i've gotten a few questions about this that i haven't answered due to how divisive people are on this one, but i figured it's probably time to give some feedback on this one since people are. extremely heated about this term. and it's not the hill to die on.

i felt like i didn't have a right to talk about this for a while, but as a transfeminine & transmasculine intersex person, i really need people to understand that queer labels, especially slurs, are way more complicated than that. now i feel like i DO have the right to speak about this, because i actually ended up having to stop being friends with a few people, and even leave my own queer discord server because of this very conversation topic.

believe it or not, this is one of the things that made me fed up with my old server. i was, at the time, friends with someone who kept pushing this narrative and would not stop to listen to anyone who pointed out that this term affects multiple groups of people. at the time, i forced myself to agree with them because they were so adamant, but as time passed i realized it was a bullshit take that was negatively impacting our server members. it is an extremely chronically online take, i agree with you. this mentality was cooked up by people who spend way too much time behind a screen theorizing about hypothetical offended trans people that don't exist.

femboy is an insult and slur that does heavily target trans women, but that does not mean its the only people it's used against. much like how queers other than just gay men qualify as fags in queerphobes' minds, there are many people that they are willing to call effeminate cis men, trans men, intersex people, genderqueer people, and so on femboys. i unfortunately used to hang out with 4channers and i have seen it used to misgender trans women a lot, but i also saw it being used to misgender cis men and trans men, as well. the amount of trans men i was seeing misgendered by this term was 1:1 with the amount of trans women being targeted by it.

it's a strawman argument. who are these hypothetical trans women they're talking about, here? where are they? i'm transfem, and the wild thing to me is, i have a lot of IRL transfem friends and i have never, once, in my life, had the "only transfems can use femboy if anyone else uses it they're transmisogynstic" conversation... ever. like i've literally even had my irl transfem friends ask ME why people are so fucked up over the term femboy. like. my other transfem friends have come to me to ask why people are so riled up over trans men and other queer people using femboy. the very people that folks think are super pissed off have asked me "wait, since when was this a big deal?" of course there will be transfems who believe the term should only be reclaimed by transfems, and i see the logic- but it only makes sense in a vacuum. in practice, the use of the slur is much more varied and complicated.

the thing people don't seem to realize is that someone throwing around a slur does not know how the other person they're targeting identifies. they're not going to sit there and go "oh you're a trans man so i can't call you a femboy. i guess i need to come up with a new insult" like. that is not how slurs work. and i just kinda find it bullshit that for some reason, this one term is special, whereas every other queer slur (save for intersex slurs) can be reclaimed by people of other identities if they're targeted by it. like, for example, butch lesbians, especially butch4butch couples get called fags all the time, and are allowed to reclaim that. why the hell is this one special?

i honestly hate that people forced transmascs to come up with an entirely different word (rosboy) in order to express the basically the exact same identity. honestly all this smacks of is people wanting to shit on trans men and transmascs and police our language. like. the friend i had to part ways with was. really fucking transandrophobic. i actually ended up hating myself for being a trans man for quite a while and tried to stop identifying as one because this person was just. so fucking shitty and rude to the transmascs in our lives, and in the discord server i used to be in. this basically just boils down to people wanting to shit on trans men and finding every excuse to do so. this take was born from people who scrutinize every single little thing trans men do in order to demonize us.

like i do NOT see people getting mad about the idea of an effeminate gay man using femboy... but they always target trans men and tell us we can't use it. why are trans men the ONLY people who are excluded, here? hmm. smells like transandrophobia to me

anyway, you're free to use the term. you shouldn't have to settle for an alternative that feels wrong and doesn't suit you, especially if you've literally been targeted by this slur to misgender you. as a transfeminine person, myself, i don't give a fuck, it's not going to hurt me if you want to reclaim something that you have been targeted by. like. if this is something that you have personally dealt with, you shouldn't have to pretend it didn't happen because some chronically online people decided they make up the rules of the queer community.

this will never be a hill to die on. it's dumb as fuck. it's made up bullshit internet drama that doesn't ever come up outside of internet discourse.

[ragnarokhound]

hey i saw ur tag on the executive dysfunction post where u said ur meds allow u to punch a hole in the wall and access the internal well of motivation or some such. can i ask how that works as in can you just do things after that?? you like have a task you gotta do and you up and do it? sorry to break into ur askbox like this i was just very curious because my executives do not function

Hi! Sure, I don't mind :)

Short answer: yes. :') I take my meds in the morning, and over the course of the day, it is much easier for me to add tasks to my mental list and then knock them down like the most dutiful Sim in the world. I forget to do things sometimes still - but those are usually due to other barriers like 'I would like to schedule this appointment, but I'm at work right now so I can't do that yet.' and then hours later I will have forgotten that I needed to do that. WHOOPSIES. Not necessarily an ADHD problem, just an average human one.

Also, the meds make it easier to access the well. That doesn't mean I always CHOOSE to use the well, haha. Sometimes I am just sooo comfy in bed and think 'i should get up. But I bet I could get away with another 25 minutes of dozing UwU' and then after my alarm goes off because my 25 minutes are up, I'm cursing my past self for being a hedonistic sloth because I really do have to get up now or I'll be late. I CAN choose correctly. That doesn't mean I do.

Long answer getting into the nitty gritty of my ADHD med journey below the cut:

So just remember that I'm not a doctor, I'm a stranger on the internet, so I don't know quite how it works, and not all medication will work the same for everyone. Executive function is huge for folks with ADHD, but it might be something else! ADHD often shakes hands with other conditions.

BUT - in my experience, I was diagnosed with combined ADHD (both the hyperactive bouncy kind and the laser focus, sit still for 12 hours doing one thing kind). A lot of my own executive function problems stemmed from not being able to choose what I hyper focused on, for how long, or if I even could. :')

There's a few different medications available to choose from once you get a diagnosis, including a fast-acting stimulant and a slow-release stimulant. The one that helps me is a slow-release - I take it in the morning, and it'll start to kick in after an hour and gives me a steady stream over the course of the day, wearing off about 8 hours later.

People with ADHD don't make as much dopamine on their own, and stimulants help your brain produce more of it. If you find yourself feeling calm and more able to focus or task-switch after drinking coffee, or soda, or other uppers, you might be self-medicating, and a diagnosis and meds may be helpful (but definitely talk that out with a doctor).

It took a while for my "storage" of dopamine to build up, and it wasn't pretty the whole journey there. There were multiple days in a row that I had to force myself to eat because the meds suppress appetite, so it was easy to skip meals I shouldn't have. (I embraced snacking over the whole day as a solution until my humors were balanced and I'd built up the habit of prepping a lunch hours beforehand lol)

But the benefits were immediate. Some things are normal, and habits are something every human has to figure out how to build regardless of whether you make enough dopamine - but I was immediately calmer. I would think 'i need to take out the garbage. I will do that now' and I would, in fact, take out the garbage? I'd just get up? And do it??? It was that easy. I find it much easier to stop in the middle of what I'm doing without getting annoyed, and to task switch without it completely breaking my flow. I'm CAPABLE of task switching at all. It's easier to remember that mug I left in the microwave. I can sit or work in silence and it's fine, I don't need music to be playing in the background to focus.

I still have to convince myself sometimes to do things when my executives don't want to function - a big coping skill I like is giving myself a crossroads moment. If I'm reading, the crossroads moment is at the end of a chapter, or a scene break. If I'm playing a game the crossroads moment is when I lost or won a round, or when I completed the task I was in the middle of, or reached a safe area.

At a crossroads moment, you can either choose to keep doing whatever you're doing, or do something else. It's why being on Tumblr and other social media is difficult to get away from, because there is no natural stopping point if you haven't turned off infinite scrolling. If that's hard for you, see if you can change your dash settings to only load a page/set number of posts at a time. You'll get a crossroads moment every time you reach the bottom of that page.

This is all my own experience with ADHD and stimulants, so again, I encourage you to think about whether this sounds like you and bring it up to a doctor if it's having a really big impact on your life.

I hope this helps! I also suggest this video from Jaiden Animations - she talks about her own experience getting an ADHD diagnosis, and funnily enough, this video dropped within the same week as I got mine, haha.

[vilevenom]

I am fully convinced that Shadow really is a hugger, for people he's close to, and that he enjoys physical affection. He's just averse to allowing it, since he's, y'know, traumatized.

Here's a quick little ficlet I wrote in a bit of a rush, since I haven't posted anything in a while ❤️

Shadow hadn't been expecting it. The urge to comfort hitting him suddenly, as Sonic's knees buckled and he fell to the floor after a rather harrowing defeat.

Shadow had only managed to show up for the very tail end, having been otherwise preoccupied when the distress message from Rouge had come through his communicator. But, he had seen his rivals friends captured and whisked away, along with his own teammates. Apparently Ivo had some nefarious purpose for the capture, and Sonic had been otherwise incapacitated while the others had been shoved into a cage. He'd noticed Tails had been injured, and Omega deactivated, which would help to explain why team Sonic and team Dark had failed.

Shadow growled as he stalked forward, fully intent on ignoring his traitorous hearts desire to sooth, and instead kick the blue hedgehog into action. However, as he approached he could hear Sonic muttering to himself, causing the hybrid to slow so he could try and make out the others wretched sounding murmuring.

"This is all my fault," Sonic whispered to himself, face tilted down and shoulders shaking, "if I'd just listened...If I had've been more aware, this wouldn't have happened..."

"What happened, hedgehog?"

Sonic's head whipped up at Shadows words, the other obviously not having realized the hybrid had shown up at the end of his battle. His eyes were rimmed with red, obviously withholding tears, and his posture was slouched, even as his quills bristled from being startled. "Shadow..."

"I..." Sonic took a deep breath, though it came back out stuttered at best, "Tails warned us all that Eggman's new Heavy's were tougher than before, and that his recon drones found out that there was some new weapon Eggman had been fitting on his hover chair. I didn't think anything of it. Y'know how Eggman is, always coming up with stupid new weapons that don't work." He paused to wipe at his eyes, though no tears were forthcoming. "I got too far away from everyone else while fighting Eggman, and Tails got hurt."

"Tell me what happened."

"What happened to Omega? I would have thought he'd be more than a match for the new models."

"I-I'm sorry, I don't know," Sonic admitted, shaking his head, "I was distracted when I heard Tails yell when he went down, and Eggman hit me with his new ray gun thing. I...I can't run."

Shadow paused, frowning as he stared down at Sonic, who in turn stared off into the middle distance. "What do you mean, you can't run?"

"Exactly that," Sonic said with a shrug, curling into himself further on the ground, "Whatever that thing was, it stole my speed. My legs feel weak, and I can barely walk, let alone run. I can't...I won't be able to save anyone."

There it was again. That incessant urge in the center of his chest to comfort the despondent hedgehog in front of him. It reminded him of how Maria would sweep him into a hug any time he spoke ill of himself while on the ARK.

With measured steps, Shadow approached Sonic and knelt next to him, the blue hedgehog flinching away at his approach.

"I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean to get everyone captured. I'll figure out some way to fix it-" Sonic began to ramble, only to be startled into silence, as instead of the punch he was expecting, Shadow wrapped his arms around his shoulders in a gentle hug.

Sonic shook slightly in his arms, a few tears finally dripping down over his cheeks as he lifted his head, offering Shadow a watery grin. "Right. Together."

"We'll figure this out, hedgehog," Shadow murmured, squeezing Sonic slightly, as Maria had once done for him, "Together."

Shadow couldn't help the tiny curl of a smile that graced his lips as determination was restored to Sonic's eyes as he returned Shadow's hug. Apparently Maria had really been onto something.

[endlich-allein]

If you could describe Till with just five qualities, what would they be?

Till has many qualities, even if he doesn't always realise it himself. I could tell you that he's perfectionist, hard-working, sensitive (even if he hides it very well), thoughtful, intelligent, independent but also attached to the group, supportive, down-to-earth, full of humour (ironic and often dark, very teasing), extremely loyal in friendship (I specify in friendship because in love he's not, in his own words), very very creative (I'd even say that artistic polymathy describes him perfectly), ultra charismatic, etc

But I'll choose five to answer your question :

• Humble : Till is often described as "a humble human being" (Olaf Heine). Despite his fame, he shows a great deal of humility, confessing that he welcomes success "with a lot of humility. And it also scares me a little. It brings responsibility and extreme pressure". He also knows that he is nothing without others, without his friends at Rammstein, without his teams, without the many people he works with, and he never hesitates to put them forward, to recognise their importance and their contribution, to make them feel good and to make sure they don't need anything. As Flake says, "He never pretends to be a great artist who needs to express his deep feelings. He prefers to think about what else can be lit on stage." It reminds me of when Joern Heitmann was doing the video for "Mutter" and Till didn't want to be alone in the video before giving in and saying "Why me ? I'm not special"... Yes, Till, you are special !

• Generous : A man with a big heart, Till shows generosity in his life as an artist, but also in his personal life. As Zoran says, "Till has a heart bigger than a football pitch". Till is very committed to charities and various social causes: sick children, the fight against cancer, Ukraine, refugees, LGBT rights, and so on. He also supports young artists by offering them opportunities to make a name for themselves and by encouraging them. Till is also very generous to us fans. One of the things that means the most to him is giving us the best shows possible, and he puts his heart and soul into them, a true conductor and master of scenography. And this has been the case since the beginning of his career, as Flake says: "An effective and well thought-out stage show was always more important to him."

• Dedicated and willing : Till is extremely dedicated to his art, even if it means compromising his well-being. We've already talked about the fact that he's done a few shows while ill or injured, that he'll do anything to make his videos as realistic as possible, even if it means getting punched in the face. He puts a lot of time and energy into making sure that everything he does is a unique experience. Till is a man of action, he's very pragmatic and prefers to act rather than talk. He is able to turn ideas that were initially theoretical into tangible facts. It is no doubt thanks to this pragmatism that all his projects come to fruition with varying degrees of success. Man of action, he is also very strong-willed. Admittedly, Rammstein has no leader and Till has never wanted to take over the leadership of the band, but we know that he is an authority figure and that when he speaks out, he is listened to. He's capable of making decisions when others are still dithering. Paul said : "We are very lucky with him - I should actually kneel down every day and thank him that we have him."

• Resilient : Throughout his life, he has faced and overcome a variety of personal and professional challenges, including criticism, controversy and media pressure. From an early age, Till has faced major challenges. First the swimming school, separation with his family, long training sessions, iron discipline and intensive doping. Then came the serious accident that put an end to his swimming career and plunged him into uncertainty. The various jobs he took on, and his rebellious and provocative behaviour, didn't help him to find stability. His eldest daughter, Nele, whom he brought up alone, dropping her off at school in the morning before going with his friends to steal and sell cars on the border with the Czech Republic, and picking her up again in the evening. His career as a musician, playing wherever he was needed, sometimes bass, sometimes drums. His violent relationship with his father and their inability to understand each other. And then there's Rammstein. A band for which, despite his shyness and introversion, he occupies the roles of singer, frontman and songwriter. Roles that he assumes, despite the enormous pressure and violent criticism, for better or for worse. A band he believed in from the start, and during the second concert he shouted : "Remember the name Rammstein !" And there's everything else we don't know, many other things, and of which Paul said : "We are lucky to have a man with life experience at the front. He went through things that none of us want to experience. Very bad things, but they are useful to us now." Yes, we're lucky that you're here, Till, that you're still here.

• Authentic and unconventional : Till is someone who, off stage, is known for being himself, not conforming to the expectations of others or society. He addresses you with polite honesty, his clear gaze plunged into yours, never twinkling. This honesty is very frank, sometimes sharp but always realistic. Till shows himself as he is, unpretentious, sincere, passionate and sometimes vulnerable. He remains a simple man, attached to his roots, his family. Gitta, his mother said : "Home, that's Mecklenburg. His homeland, his roots, his source of strength." He does not give in to the commercial demands of the music industry, preferring to retain his artistic freedom. And this artistic freedom is expressed with the provocation that has always stuck with him. But this provocation is never gratuitous, it always provokes reactions and reflection. Till is an artist and a man who doesn't fit into any box, prizes and awards leave him indifferent, what he prefers is to do what he loves in his own way...

[mickimomo]

Time Machine - Attuma x Okoye

I figured I'd write out my headcanon since you peeps liked it so much. 🤣

Enjoy

Today was the day. W'Kabi was finally being released from exile out of the kindness of council's heart.

M'Baku was apprehensive, but figured the man would be too powerless to cause any issues for the time being.

The last thing he expected to see, however, was a tipsy W'Kabi singing at the top of his lungs at 4 in the morning.

"Glory to Hanuman." He huffed as he approached the small crowd of people standing around Okoye and Attuma's home that sat on the edge of the Border Tribe. "What is he doing?" He groaned as he watched W'Kabi sing slightly off-key.

"One! I wish I never fell in love!" He shouted before holding up two fingers. "Two, I wish I never fell for you!" He dropped to his knees. "Oh, three! If I just had one more wish, I'd go back and do it all over again. If I had a time machine-"

Aneka chuckled as she watched W'Kabi spin around like he was Usher before he began to do a drunk moonwalk as he bellowed the chorus of the song. "I heard that someone told him Okoye had gotten married."

"I hope he does not think he has a chance." M'Baku groaned.

"I think the liquor gave him courage."

"If he continues, the bald headed demon will release her shark."

Aneka shrugged. "I'm hoping I get to see that."

He arched a brow. "Are you recording?"

"I am."

The regent king watched Okoye open her window while dawning a robe. "W'Kabi. Go home!"

"You are my home!"

"We're divorced! Move on!"

"How could you move on!?" He sobbed. "We had something special!"

"You did not care when you betrayed Wakanda!"

"I betrayed Wakanda for you!" He snapped. "For us!"

"We are not doing this again!" She snapped. "I'm giving you five seconds to leave or I will come through this window and end you with my spear!"

"Okoye please!"

"FIVE."

M'Baku blinked before grabbing an abandoned chair to sit on. "Count me in."

"FOUR."

Aneka snickered as she watched him yank a carrot out of his pocket to munch on before offering a banana.

"Thanks." She hummed before she began to eat.

"THREE."

"What's going on!?" Ayo frowned as she approached with a few members of the Dora Milaje.

"W'Kabi is about to get his ass beat." Aneka answered her wife as she took a bite of her banana. "Want a bite?"

"No."

"TWO."

"Why are you two just sitting here eating and watching?" She frowned.

"I wanna see Attuma beat his ass." Aneka shrugged.

"And I'm not getting punched again." M'Baku huffed.

Ayo shook her head. "The council is going to lose their minds."

"Not when they see the footage." Aneka snickered. "You should have been here earlier. He was singing Micheal Jackson and Mariah Carey."

"On key?"

"No."

"ONE."

They all turned to see Okoye try to climb out the window before she was yanked back in by a pair of blue arms.

Everyone was silent as the window remained empty for a moment.

W'Kabi watched Attuma jump out the window, dawning nothing more than his loincloth and rebreathers as he moved forward with hellfire in his dark brown eyes.

The shorter man stepped back as Attuma began shouting in his native tongue.

"You're the other man!?!" W'Kabi stared in disbelief. "I can take you!"

Ayo closed her eyes as the shorter man ran forward and threw a series of punches into talokanil's chest.

Attuma looked at his chest, completely unfazed, before he chuckled.

"I bet it'll only take one punch." Aneka offered.

M'Baku took another bite of his carrot. "I think Attuma will be nice and let him endure a few more. He seems like the type who likes to play with his enemies before killing them."

"You two are awful." Ayo sighed before accepting a bite of banana.

Attuma swung, and W'Kabi took it like a champ as he crumbled to the floor.

It was like watching a tree fall to an axe.

Slow and cumbersome.

"Damn." Aneka wrinkled her nose as they watched W'Kabi struggle to get back up. "I can't believe you were right."

"The man got his ass kicked a lot in exile. He can take a few hits."

"You knew that before making the bet."

"I did."

"Cheater."

"It's called research."

"No. It's called cheating."

They watched W'Kabi grab Attuma's leg to support himself as he tried to get back up.

"Glory to Hanuman. Have some shame-" M'Baku shook his head before feigning a wince as the warrior kneed the dazed man in the face.

"I'm stepping in." Ayo grumbled.

"No. He's still fighting." He gestured to the sobbing man. "Let him get up. Let him get up."

"My king. If he is killed, it will be a breach in the treaty."

"Attuma knows his strength." He waved off her concern. "He'll be fine."

"I..... I-" W'Kabi slurred as blood spilled from his nose. "I wiiiiiiiiiill win baaaaack my wiiiiiife."

Attuma yanked him up by the back of her shirt and stared.

"You say, your wife. When she is mine." Attuma furrowed his eyebrows. "Do not insult the mother of my child."

"CHILD!?!" W'Kabi panicked. "O-Okoye is pregnant!?!"

"Yes. If she were not, I would have considered letting her beat you herself." He narrowed his eyes. "But maybe I would have handled you still, even if she wasn't. Just so you would know that you will never have a chance."

"NO! OKOYE!" He tried to look past the warrior as tears blurred his eyes. "OKOYE!"

Everyone gasped before they began to whisper.

"Oh-"

"Girl-"

"He's bout to be sick."

"I'm telling you. He's gonna be sobbing and fasting for days."

"He is living out a nightmare I tell you."

"Damn."

"OKOOOOYEEEEEEE! PLEAAAASEEE!"

Aneka smacked M’Baku's shoulder as she tried to contain her laughter.

"I was not prepared-" Ayo covered her mouth.

"Is he crying again?" M'Baku cackled.

"Yes." Aneka laughed.

W'Kabi continued to shout. "OKOYE! TELL ME HE'S LYING!" He squirmed. "OKOYE!"

"Do not call for her. She will not answer you." Attuma tightened his hold on him. "You have come here and disturbed her rest and now you wish to stress her further." He frowned. "If you are a problem to Okoye, you are a problem to me. I will not let my wife endure anything." He growled. "Something you failed to do."

W'Kabi was shaking in the man's hold.

"So, let me make myself clear." He narrowed his eyes. "If I learn that you are bothering Okoye ever again, I will serenade you until you fall into the sea and have my sharks rip you apart." His eyes were darker than the ocean's abyss. "I say this in english... to be clear. I can also say it in Xhosa to be clearer." He grabbed the man's face roughly with his other hand. "Do you understand?"

He spat in Attuma's face before shouting. "OKO-"

Attuma cracked his head into the other man's and tossed his body before turning around with a grunt of disgust.

"And see- he did better than me." Aneka shook her head as she ended the recording. "Because I would have stomped his head in after he spat in my face."

"I think he remembered the treaty." M'Baku offered. "I wouldn't have stopped him if he chose to. I think he was being pretty nice until he spat."

"Alright. This is done." Ayo smacked their shoulders before moving in to grab W'Kabi's limp body.

"That was an uneventful fight." M'Baku sighed. "But it was still good."

"What? You expected him to fight back?" Aneka laughed. "The man was drunk. A baby could wield a spear better than a drunk man."

"I was hoping it would give him a power up. Like uh.... super strength."

"He's not that type of drunk."

"I can see that." M'Baku got up. "Send me a copy of that video. I must show it to my people in the Jabari Lands."

"You got it."

Bloopers:

Okoye sleeping peacefully while her man handles business:

Everyone watching W'Kabi lose:

In another AU, Oni and Attuma jumping W'Kabi:

[blarrghe]

so far veilguard has not really hooked me, which is very new for me with a dragon age game. I'd say it's because I'm growing up and developing less obsessive habits, but I played the sims for like 6 hours straight the other day. I'm not very far in so this crit will be very minor and I'm still giving it the whole game (probably twice) before I actually put down Opinions, but I think I'm getting the vague sense of that "shallowness" that I am trying to avoid actually seeing people complain about already...

The biggest thing for me right now is something I'm going to throw to "pacing" or maybe "narrative buy-in" because, while it starts pretty much exactly like Inquisition, it somehow does even less to grip me and make me believe the threat. Inquisition already had the weakest plot so far imo, but the big bang at the beginning put a very visible mark on the sky from everywhere you went, and there was a lot of urgency in the makeshift refugee camp that was Haven. There's no urgency at the lighthouse. There's not even really urgency at the Arlathan forest camp. There's definitely no urgency in the cities, even though Treviso is under occupation and Tevinter just suffered a demon attack. Again, maybe that will change, but even though the maps are smaller I feel like the few beginning areas are still giving me that hinterlands effect where I can just get stuck wandering about doing minor sidequests and chatting with my companions and the TWO ALL POWERFUL ELVHEN GODS are just like. somewhere. chillin. I guess. Every time someone in my party casually says "the gods must have promised them something" or "the gods must be involved in this" I'm like. Oh right. That's what this game's villain is. Ok. At least in Haven we met Corypheus and he said a sick ass line?

So the big bang at the start is kind of anticlimactic. Solas is fine, just stuck in my head. Varric is fucking fine?? Like it's nice that he's not dead, I guess, I had real suspicions he'd die in that opening scene from the trailer and while I would have been sad it would have been a very good gut punch to get me motivated. By the time I was playing I did not really believe he'd be killed there, but he's just... idk. Sitting on a bed making little comments when I walk by (which I never really do because he's like, over in a room you don't need to go into unless you want to change your appearance). It's. Fine. Again, I'm sure story stuff will pick up and he'll have something important to say at some point. But right now it's. well it's boring. sorry.

I am enjoying the companions, but other than Harding whom I liked already they do not have their claws in me yet. I am the biggest defender of "quirky" female characters but Bellara's couple of personal dialogue scenes so far have fallen so flat for me. She's cute, don't get me wrong, but something in her scene being starstruck by Neve felt very unnatural, as did her emotional outburst and then reveal about her brother. It's a fine character backstory, it's not her voice actor or writer's fault (ok, I think actually maybe it is a little her voice actor, for me. sorry again.) but I just. Meh. And I mean, I might come to really love her. I came to love several other DA characters I did not like the first time around (including some polarizing fan favourites like Anders, Zevran, and Leliana, and some more universally disliked characters like Wynne and Vivienne)

I'm really... not loving the Crow content so far. Why are they good? Why is it portrayed like a cool, good underdog thing that they "rule Antiva"? I don't mind playing with Crow pride as I'm playing a Crow, but last I checked they're literally the mafia. And I enjoy the telenovella style family drama, I do, but it does seem a little... well. it's very telenovella, which is a fucking stereotype, yknow? idk. It feels, and here's that word, shallow. Also Lucanis' cousin is so obviously in cahoots I might just stab him before we figure it out.

And a lot of this actually goes back to Rook. I have seen the complaint that you are shoehorned into plucky hero, and I had this complaint about Inquisition with Responsible Hero and made it work by building a very Responsible character and I am invested in him, so that can work. Hawke also was distinctively Hawke and that's a fan favourite (although you can play a red hawke and it is notably different from purple and blue, but you can't exactly be whoever you want). Anyway, I made a pretty sassy Crow Rook, because I tend to like a sassy rogue (they're a mage, but, you know, spellblade) the first time through a game anyway, but the lack of control over tone is real and I think it's half of why Bellara is not hitting. Like why would she tell me any of this stuff I'm literally just some cool kid with tattoos and a criminal past she met the other day. I honestly miss the heavy mantle that Wardens and Inquisitors have with their companions. Rook's just some guy in the least just some guy way and it's weird.

Anyway. I don't know. There are things I really like. The combat is obviously very fun, and I like the definite missions and kind of streamlined quest approach. I like Varric's foreshadowy narrations that let me know things might actually pick up in the later acts. I like the more definite "act" structure, which was of course the most well-reviewed part of DA2. I see the potential for a cool story, especially with these trips into Solas' past, and I'm sure there will be new lore revelations for dwarves, too. But overall it's just. I don't know. I can put it down. I can put it down for days and days, and I'm 12 hours in to a game that probably has like a 30-40 hour playtime depending on how much you sidequest. I should be more hooked. I am also only 12 hours in. It will probably get better. But also. 12 hours! I've been home alone with it for almost a month!

[gonzo-rella]

Not Right | Ellie Williams

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Pride Month 2024 #6

Requested by: Anon

Hi!!! Can I request a ellie Williams (the last of us) x sibling!reader who comes out as non!binary but also like aroacd if OK? If it's a double request I'm sorry if it turns into that

Note: Anon requested that the reader be Ellie's younger sibling, but I decided to make it ambiguous, so the reader can be read as being older or younger.

Relationship(s): Ellie Williams x nonbinary!aroace!sibling!reader (platonic)

Summary: Ellie's the first to know when you realise something's not right.

Warnings: Coming out scene(s). Implied dysphoria. (Let me know if I need to add any)

Word count: 0.5k

(A/N: So, just a warning, I haven't watched the Last of Us since it came out (other than a few rewatches of Long, Long Time), and I haven't played the game at all, so this is based purely on the show version of Ellie. I wasn't 100% confident that I'd be able to do the setting right so I decided to be as vague as possible- apologies if it's distracting! I'm just more interested in writing characters and their interactions, so I try not to worry to much about setting. Anyway, I watched some compilations and rewatched my favourite episode Long, Long Time yet again to help me get back into the character(s) and the world (I know Ellie's barely in the episode but I just needed to watch my sad gay love story again). If people want me to write for this show more, I 100% am up for that; it'll be the incentive I need to rewatch it. If anything, I want to write more Ellie fics where I can pretend I'm her cool (lameass) older sibling/older sibling figure.)

Something about your body felt cumbersome today, like your clothes had bricks in the pockets. Throughout the school day, you’d barely been able to concentrate, and you were too distracted to care when it got you in trouble. You couldn’t retreat to your room fast enough, and all you could bring yourself to do was curl up in bed. You had a few hours to yourself before your roommate would be back, and you soaked up every second of it that you could.

The silence was as peaceful as it was unsettling. And, of course, you should’ve guessed who would disturb it. Without warning, the door slammed open and you jolted upright, as though waking up from a bad dream.

“Jesus fucking Christ, El!”

“Nice to see you too.”

“Could you close the door behind you at least?”

She rolled her eyes and did as she was told.

“Did you need something?” you asked.

She shrugged.

“I wanted to check in on you. You’ve looked totally out of it all day.”

“I’m fine.”

“Do I have to punch someone in the face?”

You huffed.

“No. And, even if there was someone, I wouldn’t let you get yourself into trouble again.”

“Then, what’s up?”

“I’m just not feeling great. That’s all.”

“You’re not gonna, like, blow your brains out or something, are you?”

You glared at her.

“No.”

She held up her hands defensively.

“I’m sorry for making sure you’re not gonna do something stupid.”

Despite the words ‘I’m sorry’, she didn’t sound at all apologetic.

You didn’t say anything. She sighed and sat down on the edge of your bed, then she pushed herself back to rest against the wall.

“Come on. Talk to me.”

You closed your eyes and breathed in deeply.

“I don’t know. I guess I’ve been feeling a certain way for a while now.”

“What certain way?”

“Like something’s not right. With me.”

“Like what’s not right with you?”

You rolled your eyes at her questioning, despite knowing it came from a good place.

“Like… I’m not who my body’s telling me I am.”

“Oh. So… who are you?”

“Not a boy or a girl.”

“Right. Cool. Good for you, sib.”

You looked up at her with furrowed brows.

“That’s it?”

“What, do you want, like, a party?”

“A hug would be nice.”

“If you insist.”

She grinned and crawled across the bed and threw her arms around your shoulders. You collapsed under her weight and were pinned to the mattress in a vice grip.

“Okay, I regret asking now.”

— — —

The night felt special, despite the anxiety and tension. At school, you hadn’t been allowed out at night, and neither of you had been to the woods before, yet here you and Ellie were, camping out under the stars. You lay down on the ground, side by side, looking up at the stars through the gaps in the trees.

“Hey, El?”

She hummed in response, and turned her head to look at you.

“I’ve never been in love before. Is that weird?”

“No, of course not. I don’t think there’s many people around here worth falling in love with anyways. Slim pickings, y’know?”

You chuckled.

“Maybe someday you’ll find someone,” she suggested.

“Would it be okay if I didn’t want that?”

“Sure. It’ll be a bummer to miss out on giving the whole ‘if you hurt my sibling, I’ll fucking kill you’ speech. But, if that’s not what you want, that’s okay.”

You rested your head on her shoulder.

“Thanks, El.”

[charaznablespeteevee]

Would you share your thoughts on the Gundam you've seen? I added the first one to my list based on your posting about it (mostly the transition Char posting, he sounds like a fascinating character) and am not on Twitter to see your liveposting

Good question!! It seems like you want to know if I'd rec them so I'll answer based on that.

The original Mobile Suit Gundam (1979) absolutely I would rec to literally any anime fan. Both because it is a genuinely good anime, but equally because it's like. You know how people say you have to read the Bible to get all the references to the Bible in literature? It's like that. Gundam is one of the Bibles for anime. It's in everything. And you won't realize this until you watch it.

It's also a very good science fiction show just in general. The major characters are all great, the drama is compelling, and while some of the animation has not aged well, the newtype stuff has some super neat effects that are gorgeous to see on a big screen to this day.

It's also super accessible, the full show is available on Crunchyroll or if you don't want to commit watching a 43 episode show the three compilation movies are on Netflix and are a very solid alternative.

Mobile Suit Zeta Gundam (1985) - they got a big budget upgrade so everything is Bigger and More. More robots, more character drama, more romance, better music, and some bizarre segues into how men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Absolutely worth a watch if you liked the original Gundam because it continues to follow a lot of the original characters.

Mobile Suit Gundam ZZ (1986) - technically "skippable" if you consider 0079, Zeta, and Char's Counterattack a trilogy, which it kind of is. ZZ focuses on an almost entirely new cast of characters and the first half of the show is VERY heavy on the comedy before jumping directly into some of the best anime I've ever seen for the second half. The mood whiplash is kind of divisive among fans. Personally I like it and the characters are great. Worth a watch if you like what you've seen so far.

Char's Counterattack (1988) - caps off the gayass Amuro/Char rivalry and is just an amazing movie in general. Gorgeous visuals, and the final 15 minutes or so are a series of emotional gut-punches the likes of which I've rarely experienced in media. Must watch IMO.

War in the Pocket (1989) - six episode OVA featuring entirely new characters. This is a truly fantastic little series that lets you into the lives of a small handful of likeable characters and how their lives are affected by war. It's Gundam so guess how that goes. I liked it a LOT and recommend it. BONUS: This is a GREAT "starter" Gundam. It's short, it's very good, and you don't need to know anything about Gundam going in. There's a few references to prior lore, but they aren't anything major and a newcomer could easily figure it all out from context.

Mobile Suit Gundam F91 (1991) - this is a movie that was originally going to be made into a TV show and it shows, they stuffed far too much into too little time and it suffers for it. So unfortunately this is the first thing on this list I probably wouldn't rec. That said the characters are pretty fun and the ending is very good, so you can do a lot worse if you're bored or a completionist.

Mobile Suit Victory Gundam (1993) - this is what I'm watching right now! I'm a little over halfway done with it. This is all new characters and there are some interesting new concepts. For example the first twenty or so episodes were set on Earth so you got some really gorgeous scenery during mobile suit battles that made those scenes really visually distinctive compared to say, a battle in space. That said it's yet to really "pull me in" the way most other Gundam series did. For now I'm still waiting to see if it will do that or not.

Witch From Mercury - I'm assuming everyone knows what this is. It's gay as fuck, what can I say, and it's the entire reason I fell down into this Hell to begin with. 10/10

[originalcollectionartistry]

Goodbye Always Hurts

Yeah this is gonna be sad. I am sorry for punching y'all in the feels with this but this was the only way I could process what's happened.

If losing pets and lack of self care triggers you, I'd turn back now. I wrote this to help process my grief, and I'm posting it to maybe help others with their own grief.

Trigger warnings: Pet loss, severe depression, lack of self care, severe grief and grieving process

Content: Hunter being the empath he is, the whole batch comforting reader as she grieves and taking care of her with grace and patience

Word count: 2796

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“We should check on her… right?” Omega looked up at Hunter. “She hasn’t come out of her house for days.”

Hunter looked to the young girl, before darting his eyes back to your home. You had been the Batch’s neighbours since they settled on Pabu permanently, and they all absolutely adored you. You were bubbly, kind, and you adored animals. You were so loving to everyone around you. You were social, loving to be around people, yet always withdrew yourself with grace.

The fact that you hadn’t left your house for two weeks worried the Batch. You’d always leave the house at least three times a day for a walk. You’d take your furry companions with you and would greet everyone with love and politeness, while your pets would smother everyone with cuddles and attention.

“Well, has anyone seen her pets?” Crosshair piped up. He tried not to show it, but he’d grown fond of you. He’d often walk Batcher with you, and you missed two weeks of evening walks. He was worried for you.

Every clone had mentioned something in your life that had come and gone and wondered if that was the reason. You had your brother’s wedding on Corellia but that was three months ago. Wrecker had been your date that week. Then there was your best friend’s wedding, but Crosshair had attended that with you and that was two months ago.

“She visited her parents on Stewjon a few weeks ago. Could she have caught something?” Tech asked. “There are reports of an influenza outbreak on the planet.”

“No, cause she would have asked us to walk Bandit if she was really sick. She hasn’t commed us at all.” Crosshair said.

Crosshair knew Bandit’s habits as the collie was hyperactive and would often play for hours with the lurca hound. Batcher would be exhausted, and Bandit would be barking and herding the poor thing to play more.

“Well what else is there?” Hunter asked. “There’s no reason for her to have disappeared! She has to still be on the island!”

As her brothers kept trying to figure out what was wrong and what happened to you, Omega looked out the window and noticed something was off with the picture. From their kitchen window they could see across to your kitchen window. Usually they’d see you cooking, baking, cleaning; and normally, there would be a black and white cat sitting by the window while a black and white dog played with your broom.

“Has anyone seen Charlie? He’s usually sitting on her windowsill there…” Omega pointed to the window she’d often seen the little tuxedo sunbathing.

Hunter looked over and sure enough there was no black and white feline. That meant something was off, really off. Sick or no, you’d always be tending to Charlie in that windowsill, offering him grass or treats. Feeding him breakfast or dinner. He may have been an older cat, but he acted like a spoiled kitten all the time. He was a prince, and he acted like one. He’d never run away. Something was very wrong in your home.

“I’m going over there.” Hunter declared before walking out the door, Batcher following closely behind thinking it was playtime.

Hunter knocked and called your name about ten times before trying the door and letting it swing open. Bandit ran over, whining and whimpering, submitting to Hunter and showing her belly. Hunter bent down to give the collie some pats and scratches before searching for you.

The two dogs ran off into the yard to play as Hunter entered your home calling your name and Charlie’s. It wasn’t like either of you to not come greet people. You’d always drop whatever you were doing to come answer the door. And cat or not, Charlie acted more like a dog. He’d run over to greet guests, meow to go walks with Bandit and Batcher, and demand treats afterwards.

A small noise caught Hunter’s attention. He couldn’t quite tell what it was. He skulked throughout your home before coming to the hallway. There, he finally recognised the sounds. Quiet sobs coming from your room. He followed the noise to your bedroom and knocked gently.

“Can I come in?”

You made a noise of assent, and he opened the door to find you in bed, clinging to Charlie’s blanket. Rushing over, Hunter noticed 3 boxes of used tissues surround you in bed. Your water bottle was empty, you hadn’t eaten in days and your eyes were puffy and red and stained with tears.

Hunter gently brushed hair away from your face and saw your hand gripping Charlie’s collar. Looking around, he saw all of your cat’s things in bags and boxes. The bowls were cleaned and set aside. Toys taken apart and put into give away bags. Scratching posts disassembled with sold signs on them.

“Cyar’ika… what happened?” Hunter whispered, fearing the worst.

You took a breath and sputtered out “He- He’s go-gone. My baby boy is gone Hunter!”

You broke down into sobs again, struggling to breathe. Hunter sat you up and pulled you into his chest. Soothing you as best he could, he sent a comm to the others to let them know you were alive but to come over. Within minutes, Wrecker, Tech, Crosshair and Omega were over and comforting you. Wrecker tried to get at least some rations into you, gently urging you to eat something. Crosshair took the dogs on a walk for you, to give you one less thing to think about. Omega refilled several bottles and cantinas with water, so you’d have fluids available. Tech went about cleaning the house and organizing so you wouldn’t have to worry about chores later on. Hunter just continued holding you, cooing in your ear and hoping you could feel you weren’t alone. He eventually helped you into the fresher. He was about to leave to let you shower alone but he could see you were gripping that teal collar with white knuckles.

“Cyar’ika.” He tried to pry the collar from your hands, but you shied away from him. “Sweetheart, I know it hurts but you need to shower. Look, it’ll be right here on the counter. You’ll be able to see it through the glass.”

You eventually relinquished the collar to Hunter and stepped into the shower. As you undressed and washed up, Hunter got a nice fluffy towel and clean pajamas for you to change into before leaving you to shower in peace.

You all reconvened in the living room. Wrecker was holding you close, warming you up with his body heat. Tech handed you a mug of caf before settling beside you and Wrecker. Hunter and Omega were across from you and Crosshair was on the floor with the dogs, giving extra love to Bandit who was whining into Charlie’s old bed.

Your hands were back holding the collar and blanket for dear life. You weren’t crying anymore but your eyes had a faraway look that meant you weren’t present.

“Cyar’ika? Can you tell us what happened?” Hunter prompted softly. It was quite clear your dear kitty had passed but the poor thing was so healthy last they saw it which was just a week ago!

You moved your gaze to the tattooed man before looking down to the collar.

“Charlie, he… Um, he went into heart failure last week. I came home from work and noticed his breathing was fast and erratic, so I rushed him to the vet. He was hospitalised for 3 days in an oxygen tank before he came home on heart medication.”

Your throat started to feel tight, and you felt tears spring to your eyes again. You swallowed, trying to push the tears down. You failed in the end and let the tears flow. You explained how Charlie hadn’t been home for a week before he went into failure again. For three days you were strict on maintaining his medication schedule. You had timers and skipped work to watch him and monitor his breathing rate. In the end, on the morning of the fourth day, you noticed his breathing was rapid and shallow. Charlie was wheezing again and so you rushed him to the vet again. His lungs were filled with fluid and his chest cavity wasn’t far behind in becoming filled. His heart wasn’t pumping, his body temperature was low and there was a clot that was about to go. The critical care vet gave you a choice. You could hospitalise again and hope for the best or you could consider saying goodbye.

“I- I didn’t want hi-him to suffer any more. So, I let him go…” you trailed off, trying to remember how Charlie’s fur felt in your hands.

You remembered when you first brought him home. He was an older cat, around 7 years old, but he had the energy of a kitten. Bandit had been so scared of the old cat. She had only been about a year old when you introduced them. She refused to be in the same room as Charlie for about four months before deciding he was safe. The two would become like siblings. Often Bandit would have a go at Charlie, and you’d scold her only for Charlie to start it right back up again. They wouldn’t cuddle, but they’d sleep right next to each other. If one was on a walk, the other was waiting by the door. Eventually you got Charlie his own harness and carried him with you on walks. You were all inseparable as a family.

“You know the worst part about all this?” you sniffled, gazing at the tag on the collar. “Because of the Empire’s new travel laws, my family couldn’t come say goodbye. Mum and Dad couldn’t get tickets quick enough before they closed the hangar. My brother and sister couldn’t get the time off from work either. I’ve been alone this whole time.”

“You didn’t have to be!” Omega said, wanting to help in some way. “We were right next door this whole time!”

Hunter hushed the young girl, understanding what you were saying. You didn’t want neighbours through all this. You wanted, no, needed your family beside you.  Sure, you may have been friends with the Batch, but you needed your family. You needed your mother holding you, your father comforting you, your brother and sister crying with you. Sadly, circumstances prevented you from having the support system you needed.

“Mesh’la, what Omega means is you’re not alone anymore. We can help you out. We’re here for you. You’ve had a busy few months and you need to rest now.” Hunter soothed.

The boys nodded in agreement. You needed rest. You needed a good night’s sleep, a good meal, and probably three days’ worth of water.

“Recounting your past schedule, you had your brother’s wedding, your friend’s wedding, your sister in law’s baby shower, your work banquet, your parent’s anniversary party and now the passing of Charlie,” Tech listed. He listed quite nearly everything you had going on the past three months. You’ve barely had a moment to breathe.

“Not to mention that boyfriend of yours packing up and leaving ya,” Wrecker chimed in.

“Ex-boyfriend technically,” Crosshair sneered. He had never liked the guy; started despising him after you cried on a walk because you caught him cheating in your bed. “He’s lucky to be in one piece after pulling that stunt.”

Hunter rolled his eyes. He didn’t know your mind, but he was sure you didn’t need a recap of your life this year. You’d been through enough.

“Anyways,” Hunter interjected pointedly to his brothers, “You don’t have to suffer alone mesh’la. We’ll be right here until you kick us out. You’re not alone in this anymore.”

Omega nodded frantically. “Yeah! We’ll stay the week with you! Help you with chores and walks and cooking!”

Tears sprung to your eyes as you felt warmth envelop you for the first time in weeks. These rogue clones may not have been your flesh and blood, but they had become part of your heart in a matter of hours.

For a week, they took turns sleeping alongside you, allowing you to cuddle and cry without judgement. Nothing more than friends allowing you time to grieve and rest. Omega helped you become more yourself by encouraging you to play with her and Lyana. Crosshair practically dragged you outside for walks again. Three times a day, there he was, leashes in hand, bags in his pocket, taking you and the dogs outside for walks.

Wrecker cooked most of the time. He made new recipes to encourage you to get back to your experimental cuisine by trial and erroring different herbs and spices. Tech was honestly a godsend when it came to household chores. He created tools and contraptions to do simple tasks like loading the dishwasher, moving laundry from one machine to another, and your favourite of them all: he combined your vacuum and mop to move as one. Self-propelled in patterns for optimal clean.

Echo and Rex would call and check in between missions but you were most thankful for Hunter. The poor man had been through so much himself and yet he remained soft and sweet. When you had first met, you thought the man was so shy. Now you knew better. He was a sweet and loyal man who did everything for those he cared for and now he was taking care of you.

“Thank you Hunter. For finding me and helping me through this. It’s been so hard the past week. You guys being here has been a huge help.” You both were curled on the couch, drinking caf while everyone went about their morning routine.

Hunter smiled, pulling you closer into his side. “Of course, sarad. Anything for you.”

Smiling back, you both sat in silence before you both heard Bandit whimper. You looked over to see the poor collie sniffing and pawing at Charlie’s blanket. You’d set it on his favourite chair as a way to make you feel he was still there. Now, you watched as Bandit whined and whimpered, yipping as she smelled Charlie’s scent but couldn’t find him. Your heart broke all over again as you watched Bandit search and smell out for the cat. Once she gave up, Bandit skulked over and set her head in your lap, looking at you with big sad brown eyes.

Tears came to your eyes again and you sobbed into the pup’s fur. “I know bubs. I know, I miss him too. I miss him too.” You gave some pats and scratches on her nose before Bandit decided to curl under your side of the couch.

Looking over to Hunter, you sniffled and wiped your eyes. “I’m sorry. You all must think it’s so silly of me to grieve so hard over an animal.”

Hunter shook his head, taking your hand and putting it to his heart. “Aliit ori’shya tal’din.”

“What?” you asked in confusion. You’d never heard Mando’a in person and it was an odd sounding language but beautiful, nonetheless.

“Aliit ori’shya tal’din.” Hunter repeated. “It’s an old Mandalorian saying we were taught by the Jedi and our older brothers before we were deployed. It means, ‘family is more than blood’.”

You sat with that knowledge for a moment, processing Hunter’s words. You liked that saying. It showed no judgement in your little family and allowed you to learn a little of Mandalorian culture.

“In other words, sarad, it doesn’t matter if your family is your flesh and blood or little furry animals you care for. It’s your family. You choose who is a part of it.”

The door opened and you saw Tech holding a small object in his hands. He handed it to you before taking the collar off your wrist and securing it to the object. You smiled, mourning, seeing the little cat shaped urn.

“I’ve painted it, so it looks similar to Charlie’s markings. That way, he’s truly still with you. I just thought the collar tied it all together.”

You let tears fall down your cheeks as you held the small urn in your hands. Your boy may be gone now but you took comfort knowing he wasn’t suffering anymore. His spirit was probably curled up on his blanket as you and the Batch gathered in your living room. You may not have had your family with you, but you had found a new family to help you through this difficult time. You weren’t alone anymore.

You knew the grief would always follow you. It would always hurt. Yet, you also knew, in time you would open your heart to another furry friend. For now, you’d remember your little Charlie.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sad thing is, everything in here is true. My parents couldn't come home, my brother was stuck up north, and my sister was filming a series. My partner didn't cheat on me but he was away at work as well. I was truly alone throughout the past two weeks.

The house is quieter and my poor Bandit is struggling to adapt without her sibling. She whines and searches the house for Charlie until I settle her in her crate for the night and is very cuddly once I come home from work as she has no kitty to cuddle with during the day.

On October 7 I came home from work to find Charlie wheezing and struggling to breathe. I rushed him to the vet and he spent 2 nights in an O2 tank. He came home Wednesday night and he seemed better. HCM is a sinister thing and cats are so good at hiding when they’re sick.

Sunday morning, October 13th at 9:42am, I had to let my baby go. He was only 10 years old and I've only had him for 3 years. He was a foster fail and one of the best decisions I ever made was to bring him home.

Rest in peace my little familiar. You'll be sorely missed.

[cousmemes]

dialogue starters from DOCTOR WHO SEASON 8. feel free to edit for context / continues under the cut.

"I'll wager you've not seen anything like this before."

"Listen to me. You need to calm down."

"I'm not flirting, by the way."

"What have I done wrong?"

"Are you judging me?"

"Just because my pretty face has turned your head, do not assume that I am so easily distracted."

"Whatever it takes, I will keep you safe. You will be at home again."

"I'm cold. There's no point in us both being cold. Give me your coat."

"Are you cross with me?"

"You were talking about me?"

"What is happening right now to you and me is more important than your egomania."

"Nothing is more important than my egomania."

"You've redecorated. I don't like it."

"You can't see me, can you? You look at me, and you can't see me. Have you any idea what that's like?"

"I was being funny. I just do that."

"How long have you been there?"

"Are you going to look that terrified when you take me out for a drink?"

"You were smiling at nothing. I'd almost say you were in love."

"I need you."

"An anti-climax once in a while is good for my heart."

"We cannot waste this chance. It won't come again."

"Isn't the universe beautiful?"

"I think you're probably nice. Underneath it all, I think you're kind and you're definitely brave. I just wish you hadn't been a soldier."

"I don't know if you're a good man. But I think you try to be and I think that's probably the point."

"Old-fashioned heroes only exist in old-fashioned storybooks."

"Do people ever punch you in the face when you do that?"

"Well then, draw your sword and prove your words."

"People are so much better at sharing information if they think the other person has already got it."

"Right, you do that again and you'll regret that."

"We can't just let them kill him!"

"She should not have told you any of that."

"Perhaps others will be heroes in our name. Perhaps we will both be stories. And may those stories never end."

"I wasn't making assumptions about you."

"You just have to squeeze through."

"How did you get in?"

"You know, you should have more than one chair. What do you do when people come round?"

"The deep and lovely dark. We'd never see the stars without it."

"I mouth off when I'm nervous and I've got a mouth on me. Seriously, it's got a mind of its own."

"Tell me the truth - because I know when people are lying to me."

"I am not going to leave you in danger!"

"Sorry, who put you in charge?"

"However this goes, whatever happens, don't let me end up like that."

"They have no power over you now. You can do exactly what you want to do now. Exactly what you've always wanted to do."

"Go and enjoy yourself. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"There's no way out of this. We're going to die here."

"Why are you being nice?"

"Every time I see you, it's like you're in a rush."

"The next few days are all about you. I promise."

"Human beings have incredibly short life spans. Frankly, you should all be in a permanent state of panic."

"How can you think that I'm her dad when we both look exactly the same age?"

"He's my boyfriend. I thought you'd figured this out."

"Why wouldn't I be okay? I was fine till you blundered in."

"It's funny, you only really know what someone thinks of you when you know what lies they've told you."

"Please, tell me how I fix this."

"I'm bored. Let's go somewhere fun. What do you say?"

"I know men like him. I've served under them. They push you and make you stronger, till you're doing things you never thought you could."

"Is there some sort of fancy dress thing on this evening?"

"I am so sorry. I've had a wobble. It's a big wobble, but it's fine. Forget about it."

"Where are you and are you in trouble?"

"Lying is a vital survival skill. And a terrible habit."

"Do you want the good news or the bad news?"

"We're in the bad news! I'm living the bad news!"

"Why can't you just say it? Why can't you just say I did good?"

"You are enjoying this just a little bit too much."

"Don't make me say it."

"I don't want to be the last of my kind."

"I don't want to see more things. I want to see the things in front of me more clearly."

"I just want to know the truth. I don't care what it is. I just want to know it."

"Shut up, shut up, shut up. I need to talk to you."

"Oh, everything is better when you're here."

"Please speak to me. This is - this is killing me.

"I love you. And you are the last person who's ever going to hear me say that."

"By now, I'm sure you've heard the rumours, and it is with great sadness that I must confirm them to be true."

"He was alive, and then he was dead and it was nothing."

"Don't. Be very, very careful with that."

"I know what you're doing. You're trying to take control."

"I am in control. Do as you are told."

"I was curious about how far you would go."

"You betrayed me. Betrayed my trust, you betrayed our friendship, you betrayed everything that I've ever stood for."

"Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?"

"Speak for me again, I'll detach something from you."

"This isn't possible. The dead don't come back."

"Be strong, even if it breaks your heart."

"Say something only you could say. Tell me something only you would know."

"Whatever it takes, I will be with you again, I swear."

"So you know who I am, right?"

"Look, are you going to help me? Because I can't do this alone."

"And didn't all of those beautiful speeches just disappear in the face of a tactical advantage?"

"I wasn't very good at it, but I did love you."

"There's something that I have to tell you and, er, it's not good news so just - just listen, okay?"

"Never trust a hug. It's just a way to hide your face."

"Thank you for making me feel special."

[puptoy]

The following fantasy includes: a little bit of piss, werewolves, cnc, outdoor sex, stalking/voyeurism, facefucking, talk of breeding, possessive behavior, musk/scent marking, humiliation, gender play (a sub with a pussy who likes to crossdress/present masc, referred to as "bitch" a lot, "wife" one time, "boy", and with female anatomical terms), size kink

Imagine you're a werewolf (or some other pent-up and feral beast of your choosing) and I wandered too far into your territory. There's nobody out here in these beautiful woods as the sun starts to set, but I'm new in town, so I figure it's a lucky coincidence. I think I'm extra safe because I'm wearing masculine clothes; people don't tend to bother me for hiking alone when I look like a guy. Big hoodie, cargo pants, my hair cut short but grown out a little shaggy.

But you don't care about any of that. You can tell just from my scent that I'd be easy to breed. And more than that - you can tell I'm lonely. Can't smell any other humans on me. You don't normally do this, but you're so pent up yourself... Something about me is driving you to desperation. You follow me at a distance for a little while, just to be sure it's me that has you reacting this way, aching, your cock heavy and swollen half mast just from thinking about it. And as the full moon rises higher, you keep thinking: this little human is here for me. Why else would they come here? Has to be for me. Your instincts keep telling you I'd be a good little mate.

Finally, you see me looking around a little clearing, the ground padded with soft clover. I check over my shoulder to make sure I'm alone and can't see you (humans have terrible night vision, poor things). You watch me pull my hoodie up and hold it between my teeth, exposing my tummy, the place where my hips curve up to my waist, the little trail of hair that goes down from my navel. I unbutton my pants and push them down along with my boxers, stepping out of one leg, then the other, bent over, exposed. You see the way I carry weight on my soft, plump ass and thighs and you think about mounting me.

Then I squat down low to relieve myself. And I just look so vulnerable like that, my thighs spread out wide, a hand braced against a tree for balance as I try to keep from stepping in my own mess. You can smell things I don't even know about myself; you know I'm ovulating. Your eyes fix on my pink pussy, on display for you, and your instincts take over entirely.

By the time I hear your low rumbly growl, it's way too late to run.

I make a pretty cute effort, though. You chase me for a few yards, easily catching my arm and pulling me against you. I freeze for a moment, feeling you solid and hot against my back. You're huffing against my neck, licking and grazing your sharp teeth against my shoulder, making me shiver.

You're so keyed up at first, it's hard to get words out, but you've heard communication is important in relationships. You manage a low, "Bitch. Wife. Mine."

Shocked out of my freeze, I jerk and shake my head, coming up with the first panicked excuse I can think of. "No, ah, oh fuck, I'm not- I'm a boy, not your wife, wrong person, sorry-"

You don't see how that should matter when I was clearly made to be yours. You push a hand up under my hoodie and touch me all over - my belly, my waist, my soft little tits - while I squirm and gasp and try to get away. Twisting me around so you can kiss me, you lick into my mouth until I've settled and then speak against my lips. "My boy. Bitch boy," you insist.

I make a noise that's half shame, half gut-punch arousal. I didn't know being called names like that would turn me on so much. Amused, you lick my neck. I moan. As far as you're concerned, that settles that.

You pin me down hard under your heavy body so I can barely move, but I still thrash when I feel you pushing one of my knees up to part my legs. My heartbeat is pattering so quick I sound like a prey animal. You slide a hand down my hip, between my thighs, laughing softly when you feel it, murmuring, "So wet." And then you're rubbing little circles into my clit, honing in on what makes me wetter until slowly I go from struggling and kicking to softly whining and spreading my legs a little wider for you.

You purr, "There, that's right, good boy." You tell me you're gonna take me right here. That you're gonna keep me in your den and breed me over and over. Mate me, keep me. I'm out of my mind, but I nod and say "Yeahhh" as you let your fingers dip lower.

You feel my slick entrance, watching the way I lift my hips to chase the touch. I spread my legs even wider. Your fingertips press into me, and even that is a snug fit at first. Even as wet as I am, it'll be a struggle to fit your cock in me. You can see it when we grind against each other - your thick, monstrous breeder cock bobs down under its own weight, the length of it going up past my navel. You tug my hoodie up and lap at my sensitive tits to soothe me, but you think it's cute how tense and tight I get around your fingers when I notice how big you are, how deep you're going to get inside me. "Oh god," I breathe, "It won't fit, we can't, I can't-"

You grind against the crook of my hip, getting off on the thought of making it fit. Your mate is so cute, so soft, so easy to push around. You pull your fingers out of my pussy and shove them in my mouth, growling, "Suck." When you feel my tongue moving obediently, you nuzzle my chest, proud. "Good. Mine. Gonna be a good bitch, use your lil' cunt, train you t'take it. Mount you every time I need it. My cocktoy, good boy, mine..."

Perfect. It's all perfect and you love me, love your mate. You could fuck me right here but you're too impatient, so you just keep going, making possessive promises and playing with my mouth while you frot against me. You rub and hump against my belly, my thigh, my hip until you cum with a feral whine, long ropes of thick cum landing on my skin. And that's... Mm. You like that.

Oh. Fuck. You don't know what it is, but you like that a lot.

You gotta make sure I smell like your bitch.

Making me kneel on the ground, rubbing your cock on my face, making me lap against and worship your full, heavy nutsack. Rubbing you cockhead against my lips, smearing them with pre until I open up and suck. At first enjoying the way I suckle and swirl my tongue around the tip, then grabbing a fistful of my hair and sighing in pleasure when you push into the tight squeeze of my throat. I'm trying my best to swallow around you but it's just too thick. Such a mess, drooling down my chin, tears in my hazy eyes.

Cum against my open mouth and tell me not to swallow until you say so. Bite an obvious mark into my neck, and then finally stand back up pick me up. Take me to your den and keep me.