#Fadel can say whatever he wants

[braceletofteeth]

✨ The first burger ✨

[thasorns]

THE HEART KILLERS (2024-2025) เขาจ้างให้ผมจีบนักฆ่า dir. Jojo Tichakorn Phukhaotong

[secriden]

This line. God, this line! It has been eating me up inside for 2 days now, because let's not forget, this line isn't about love, it's about trust. And that has implications that make me want to scream.

It's a direct reference to this moment earlier in the episode:

At the start of this discussion, Style and Fadel still have a kind of playful air about their conversation:

Style: Oh? Not even me? Fadel: You're at 80% at best. I feel like you're hiding something from me in the 20%.

In this exchange, though, there's a sense that Fadel is issuing a challenge, like there's something specific which Style can do to gain Fadel's full trust. And while Style knows there are things he cannot (yet) reveal to Fadel, I think a part of him is determined to be as honest as he can be, which is why he issues a challenge of his own by asking for more specificity:

Style: What do I have to do to gain your complete trust?

Part of this question is a simultaneously inquisitive and deflective - What (and why) do you think I'm hiding (something) from you? - but there's also a moment after Style finishes speaking where he stills and goes quiet that feels... genuine, weighty. Or, as @airenyah has pointed out in her meta on Style in episode 4, the "grounded[ness]" in Style's demeanour is a signal that Style means what he's saying in the moment. Maybe about his own desire to be worthy of Fadel's trust, maybe about how he genuinely does want this relationship to be real in whatever way that matters to Fadel.

I think Fadel sensed that too, because the moment looses all the lightheartedness it had before. Fadel pauses, and then gets a look on his face that just... breaks my heart. There's a sombreness there, like he knows he's going to have to say something that makes him sad. Fadel looks away, and then down, before he seems to steel himself and says:

Fadel: It'll never happen. No matter how much you love someone, I just don't believe that you can completely lay yourself bare in front of them.

Fadel says this like it's fact. Like what he's expressing is something foundational and true and irrefutable. It's not even about his doubt in Style's honesty, because this statement has no qualifiers or conditions put on it to connect it to Style. Rather this is what Fadel fundamentally believes about relationships and trust: he finds the very concept of being fully known and still accepted an impossibility.

Sure, maybe this is because of the falling out (or betrayal or disappearance) associated with the former lover; but I also think it might be because Fadel is acutely aware not only that he's hiding a rather big and dark secret (not to mince words, but: actual literal premeditated murder), but also about what it implies about Fadel. Because being able to kill another human, coldly and clinically and without remorse, takes a certain type of person. Because, yes, Fadel has lived through an absolutely harrowing and traumatising event (his parents' murder), but it's also undeniable that it changed him. Because there's something about Fadel that twisted dark and which he never quite got back. There's an anger, a hurt that colours every moment of his life; that enables him to look a man in the eyes, smile politely, and pull a trigger.

And at this point in their relationship, Fadel's understanding of Style is that he's... well, kind of innocent. Especially in comparison to Fadel and Bison, and even Kant.

Style, who easily reveals facts about his life which Fadel already knows (winning a car tuning competition), making Fadel doubt his own instincts about Style hiding secrets. Style, who also reveals the things Fadel doesn't know, like the tender and secret pain of a mother lost to cancer (which, now that I think about it, Fadel may also know) and his worries about a father who "lost his bearings for a bit" (which he probably doesn't). Style, who tries to comfort Fadel in his own loss by offering a safe space and a sympathetic ear.

Style, who doesn't just see Fadel for his tragedy, but is asking to be given the chance to accept all of Fadel as a person. Style, who not only wants but has the capacity, to be the only person Fadel needs to rely on. Style who, despite the sea of differences between them, understands Fadel on a level that is so very foundational.

I'm going to slightly segue and mention something that may not resonate with everyone, but really hit me in the gut this episode: because I lost my father when I was 16 after he battled cancer for 2 painful years. And this revelation about Style has totally shifted and coloured everything Style has done in a new light for me. Because not only does this totally explain Style's sometimes almost stubbornly childish demeanour (it's common in adults who've had to 'grow up' too early), but also why Style shows seemingly random flashes of insight and maturity when they are most crucial. Notably, Style has this almost instinctive sense of when he needs to back off a sore point with Fadel that I couldn't quite put my finger on until this episode.

I've seen a few jokes about Style's awkward subject change, but I've actually got a friend who I hold very dear to my heart who was one of the only people to give me a sense of normalcy and comfort when my dad was on his last few days and then at his funeral. And part of that was the instinctive way she would know when I needed to just. Not be a grieving daughter for a few minutes. To get a small respite from the overwhelming hopelessness and sense of impending loss. To get a moment to breathe and gather my strength, because knowing I was never going to see my dad again, or hear his voice, or hold his hand was tearing me apart back then. Sometimes she'd talk to me about college drama, sometimes she'd introduce a new kpop video to me, sometimes she'd just ask me what I wanted to eat and take me to go have a meal with her. And sometimes there really just isn't anything else to say other than "I'm sorry." Nothing you say - nothing you can say - is going to ever, ever make this grief go away, and in most cases, it was better when people (especially those who couldn't really understand) didn't try.

And I think if you look at Fadel very closely, there's a moment of genuine surprise (Fadel wasn't expecting the subject change at all) and then... something that looks like fondness mixed with exhausted relief. Because I don't think Fadel was ready to talk about his parents yet. This was honesty he wasn't ready to give Style, mostly prompted because Style himself had willingly been so vulnerable that a part of Fadel wanted to reciprocate. But further down that path lies not only his darkest memories, but also the connection to the part of his life he is not willing to share with Style yet. So this subject change is a relief, it's a blessing, but it's also Style knowing when he shouldn't push any further with Fadel's fragile heart.

Which brings me back to how well the episode's theme of trust (both deserved and undeserved) was woven in this episode. This is true on multiple levels and characters but I'm not even going to attempt to touch Kant in this post because... Lord, that is beyond me at the moment. Someone else needs to do that, pretty please, so I can reblog it and scream.

It starts, somewhat unexpectedly, with Fadel asking for entrance into the intimate spaces of Style's life.

So, this episode was not about Fadel's fear of his own feelings, desires, or even affection for Style - that appears to be fully addressed in episode 4. I think that's why we see Fadel be so physically affectionate and indulgent of Style in this episode. He's come to terms with his lust for Style's body (hence his comfort in initiating sex), he's accepted Style as his boyfriend and so can enjoy Style's playful teasing (still reluctantly, but Fadel is still an introvert even if he's mostly enjoying Style's rambunctious nature), and give into Style's (and Bison's and Kant's) cajoling with relatively little fuss.

He's even comfortable toying with the edges of revealing his darker and more sinister side by reminding Style implicitly about how violent Fadel has the potential to be. Recall that Fadel knows Style knows some of his capacity for violence; he just doesn't know how very thoroughly Style is aware of the full scale of this truth. It does help that Style evidences no actual fear and, in fact, looks positively euphoric. Like, buddy, pal, dearest one... please control yourself.

And yet something very, very telling is the way the show makes it a point to depict Fadel very deliberately getting drunk during the double date. Even before the date has started, Fadel looks to be about half a beer in and we see him constantly drinking, drinking, drinking during the whole date. From the conversation about trust he has with Style while Kant and Bison are being off key and adorable about it, to after Kant leaves and Bison gets worried. And we've seen Fadel cope with emotional and mental distress with alcohol before, so we know that Fadel is internally fighting some kind of very intense battle even as he is also very clearly enjoying moments with Style on this date (most notably when they're dancing by the bowling lanes and when Style asks him to go home with him).

So here's my take: rather than being about love, this is about Fadel fighting to hold onto his own philosophy on relationships and trust. Because as much as I do believe Fadel believes he's telling the truth when he tells Style that 100% trust is "impossible", I think it's clear that's not what he wants.

What he wants is to finish this last job so that the only thing he can't be honest about with Style will finally stop being a factor in his life. What he wants is to fully and completely reciprocate the openness Style seems to be giving Fadel. What he wants is to switch off his brain and let his heart lead for once, to stop fighting a battle he has no desire to win anymore, only he can't. Trust (not love) is Fadel's final frontier, and one which he can't quite give up in spite of himself.

Which is why I think Fadel intentionally gets himself drunk here. Because he wants to let his guard down around Style. He wants to open himself fully, he wants to "lay himself bare" for Style, he wants Style to know the full truth and accept him anyway - and he gets so close, but can't quite get there - because he doesn't know that Style already has.

When Style says this, Fadel thinks it's empty words, not knowing that Style has long passed the bar Fadel thinks is insurmountable. And just like Style was able to offer safety and reassurance to the vulnerability Fadel was showing in episode 4, Style instinctively gets to the core of Fadel's darkest fears again:

Style: One day, I'll be your 100%.

This isn't (just) a promise that Style will wear Fadel's stubbornness down, or that Style will be worthy of Fadel's 100% (which, already, has me in tears, ngl). Beyond that, this is Style promising Fadel isn't ruined for this; that it isn't too late, that whatever hurts and wounds Fadel has can be made whole again. That the kind of honest and all-encompassing and unconditional trust which Fadel says is impossible can, in fact, be his. That Fadel still has the capacity to trust and be trusted the way he so desperately, painfully longs for.

I know a lot of people have said Style in this episode is writing cheques he has no ability to honour, but I think it's more layered than that. Because in a very significant and profound way, Style is wholly deserving of Fadel's trust. Because in all the ways that Fadel has ever known he should want, Style actually IS worthy of his trust. Style knows the truth Fadel is hiding, knows what this man is capable of, knows the danger of being in his arms, knows the likely nonexistent future Fadel has to offer him -- and wants him anyway. Style is a man who would stare into Fadel’s darkness and reach out first. Strip away the complication of Kant being blackmailed and dragging Style into his mission, and Style is literally perfect for Fadel. He is exactly what Fadel wants (and possibly has wanted for a very long time). He is, in fact, exactly what Fadel needs to ever experience anything beyond the shadow of a life he's had so far.

But oh, the cruel narrative means that Style is also, simultaneously, painfully undeserving of Fadel's trust; and this is something Style is very much aware of. I think that's why he's trying so very hard to be worthy in all the other ways he can be. Style's awareness of what Fadel is hiding enables Style to (counterintuitively) be completely honest about his feelings for and about Fadel even as he cannot reveal his motivations. So he gives Fadel as much honesty as he can: offers the vulnerability of his own pain and hurts; the comfort of his true understanding and acceptance.

And just as Fadel's vulnerability in the abandoned factory was met with Style choosing a form of physical connection that prioritised Fadel's pleasure (it's made very clear that Style is jerking Fadel off and that all his focus in that moment was on Fadel, not his own pleasure), so too is this moment met with Style very intentionally choosing to worship Fadel's body with all the tenderness and genuine emotional weight that Style wanted Fadel to have in their first time in the storeroom.

Because, crucially, this was Style giving Fadel the chance to lay himself at least physically bare. This is the closest either of them can get to full honesty with the secrets they both are keeping. It's why Style tries so very hard to show the care and adoration and genuine feelings he has for Fadel. Why he makes sure that the vulnerability of Fadel getting himself as drunk and as relaxed and as trusting as Fadel can allow himself to be is tied only to gentleness and tenderness and pleasure.

Because Style actually knows that Fadel can't (and shouldn't) trust him in the way Fadel truly wishes to.

And as much as I believe that Style genuinely means this from the bottom of his heart, the horrifying full truth is that it is Style that has the metaphorical knife hovering over Fadel's chest. He is the one with the capacity to actually give Fadel a new scar that would truly matter. He is, in fact, the only one Fadel wants to fully trust -- and this, along with Style's compromised heart, makes it so that the circumstances will doom them both.

[sunsetsover]

i went back and watched first ep of thk again this time without being psychologically flashbanged every 2 seconds (which was only semi-successful tbh) and my biggest take away out of everything was that bison really gets off on power.

you can see it clear as day in that very first scene with the guy that they're targeting. this is clearly someone who has money and power - he's picking men out of line up like they're nothing more than clothes on a rack. but the reality is that bison is the one who's really in charge. bison is the one who has all the control. bison literally has this big, powerful man's life in his hands, and he really, really likes that.

you can see it in the look on his face when he shoves the guys face into his chest - he's disgusted, clearly, but he's also smiling. he looks so deeply satisfied, and why would he in a situation like that if not for the fact that he knows he has all the power in the world in that moment and is almost a little turned on by it. it doesn't matter that the other guy thinks bison's some weak little guy to be bought and given commands. it doesn't matter he's sitting there all smug thinking he's in control. bison knows the truth. that's enough. it's probably why he can so easily play along - that knowledge. that power. because really, what does it matter how rich or powerful someone is now that bison has him in his clutches? and what is that if not complete and total power?

you can see this desire for power and control bleed into other dynamics too. i think it's why he's so 'difficult' with fadel. fadel clearly loves and cares about him, and his concern is well meaning, but he does treat bison like a child. and to a certain degree it's probably warranted (i mean look at what happened at the karaoke bar). but at the same time between him and the little bit we know so far about their mother, bison's completely smothered. and sheltered (the guy doesn't even know how to cook a burger. they literally run a diner). and i think that has less to do with bison being inherently untrustworthy or reckless, and more to do with the fact that he just doesn't want to do what he's told. and i imagine in turn that made his mum - and by extension fadel - tighten the reins on him.

because bison, at least so far, seems to have really no control or even any say over his own life. he just does what he's told, either his mother or by fadel. he has no other choice really - it seems he has nothing and no one else. he's effectively trapped (which i think will be the catalyst in his and kant's relationship, bc kant is also trapped in a situation he can't get out of, but i digress) so he's rallying against their control over him in whatever little ways he can - causing problems, being difficult, being purposefully obtuse. i think bison is someone who knows he doesn't have any real power, and so uses what he does have to his advantage. he plays dumb and weak and naive and sweet to manipulate people and situations so he can get what he wants for a change. that's his power. and it seems effective enough, and he probably likes the little things that it can get him, but i think what bison really likes is the fact that he can make people bend to his will. sure he has to work for it, but the fact that he can have people dancing to his tune while being completely unaware of what he's doing is what he really likes. i think that's where bison's true power lies. and i think that that power goes straight to his head.

which brings us to kant. kant, who - at least in my opinion - bison thought was just another guy with a big ego who just expected bison to lay down and take it. like idk i just got the impression that bison was not super impressed w kant at first. and bison does try briefly to wrestle kant for the dominance/power that kant obviously thought was his to take (like the tapping to see who was going to go to who, and getting in each others face to see who was going to break and kiss the other first) but soon enough bison just lets him have it bc ultimately it's not that important. they weren't supposed to ever see each other again. he was gonna get off either way. but even so bison gave as good as he's got, making sure kant knew he wasn't just gonna lie down and take it. and i think that at some point bison kinda realises hey this guy is actually listening. hey he's kinda malleable actually. hey he's kinda putting on a lil show for me, taking his shirt off nice and slow. hey this is a lot more fun than i thought it would be. but at the end of the day he doesn't get his shit rocked by kant the way kant clearly gets his shit rocked by bison. bison literally put that man to sleep. kant's lying on his sofa all but twirling his hair afterwards. in comparison bison doesn't even seem particularly bothered about the whole thing until kant shows up at the diner.

but anyway my point is we pretty much know bison's desire for power is going play out in his dynamic with kant bc of the whole bdsm thing. imo this is going to be even more important if it does turn out that he knows/suspects kant's motives - which, after a second watch, i am a lot more likely to believe. it was just so obvious. of all the things bison could've been doing right then, he just so happened to be cleaning the windows? with a big mirror right next to him? yeah ok sure. but don't expect me to act surprised if we find out down the line that bison was behind the scenes puppeteering this whole thing with kant - and with his family too.

because really the question is if he suspects kant's intentions - which he clearly did, no matter how briefly - why would he not tell fadel? why would he not seek help? and i think the answer to that lies - again - in the fact that bison wants power. any thread of it he can grab onto he does with both hands, whether that be that killing or domming or pissing people (fadel) off. playing games with people's minds and lives in that way - even those of the people closest to him, even his own - really doesn't seem like that much of a stretch judging by his behaviour so far. i think he'd probably be rubbing his hands together like an evil little fly at the thought of everyone thinking he was dumb or naive or a liability when the whole time he's the one pulling all the strings. he's the one who has everyone's lives in his hands. he's the one keeping all of their asses out of prison while at the same time he's got the guy who's supposed to be his downfall tied up in knots (both literally and metaphorically)

and even if that isn't the case and bison really does have no clue what kant's up to, i still think he's loving the fact that kant is so desperate and eager to win him over. bc ulterior motives or not kant really was sooooo dickmatised by bison. even before chris got on his ass he was telling his bestie abt it like 'i didn't even get his name 🥺️ it's like i slept w a ghost 🥺️ he only exists in my memory 🥺️' like he was down horrendous for bison the moment he got him in that hotel room, and bison KNOWS it. he knows the power he holds over kant, and he loves that shit. he loves that kant ate that shitty burger just to stay on his good side and he loves that kant is so doggedly persistent in trying to be his boyfriend and he loves that when his big brother tried to scare him off kant didn't run or give up but instead asked him 'well how can i get him off our backs?'

and sure we know why. but does it really matter? bison just loves the fact that he can tease kant and not give him what he wants and still kant will just grin and continue to chase him, drooling like a cartoon dog who's just caught scent of a freshly cooked steak. it doesn't really matter why: bison loves power and he loves how eager kant is to give it to him. that's why it's really not that shocking their relationship veers into bdsm territory. kant already seems more than willing to give bison whatever he wants, and what bison really wants is power (and freedom, but we haven't really seen the depth of that particular want just yet). of course kant's going to give him that power, no matter what that looks like.

(but while we're on the topic, i'm really interested to see the dynamics kant and bison adopt the next time they have sex. we know they venture into bdsm territory eventually, but if bison introduces that into their sexual relationship right away (excluding their first time obv) i'm gonna be really side eyeing that little guy bc it's like oh? why are so desperate to be in charge? is it bc you know that guy thinks he's playing you and you wanna see how far he'll go to get what he wants? is it bc the idea of you having this man - this man who thinks he's playing you for a fool - blindfolded and tied to your headboard makes you feel drunk with power? is it bc the idea of hurting this man who's trying to hurt you and him wholeheartedly LETTING you gets you off like nothing else? bc if that really is the case we're reaching unprecedented levels of horny i fear)

anyway this post was just supposed to be a little thing about bison getting off on power i didn't meant for it to turn into a character study/ted talk on his relationship dynamics but here we are lmfao anyway i love bison already i wanna dissect him in a lab <3

[ae-azile]

Untitled Fadel/Style Fic Preview: Post 1x07

Style meant it when he said he deserved to die at Fadel’s hands. He never wanted any of this to happen. He could have told Fadel that he never personally spoke to the cop and didn't even know about Kant being coerced into becoming an informant or Fadel being a hitman until after they started dating. He could say that he simply agreed to seduce Fadel in exchange for a car.

Somehow, that sounds just as bad. And if he puts all the blame on Kant, that makes him more of a snitch. Style never even wanted to be a snitch.

“I really do love you,” Style says to him, keeping his eyes on the road, “Even when you point your gun at me, my heart flutters in my chest-”

“Shut up,” Fadel says, pressing the gun further into his side.

Style rolls his eyes at the order. As if Fadel would shoot him when he's the one in control of the car.

“I can't be quiet on car rides,” Style says, “It makes them go by too slowly. The music is great, but we already established that we have different tastes. Let's talk-”

“Style-”

“Fadel,” Style counters, “I’m bored. Let's talk.”

“I'm not going to talk to some fucking snitch.”

Style groans at that, “Whatever you tell me will die with me! You’ll make sure of that!”

“No.”

Apparently, Style will just have to deal with Fadel’s decision, so he focuses on the road until sunset. It's only when they are running on fumes that he pulls over.

“Did I say you could stop?” Fadel asks as Style pulls into the parking lot of a fuel station.

“I'm sorry,” Style says, hopping out, “I didn't realize your car runs on psychological, emotional, and sexual tension! You should have told me you were this environmentally friendly.”

“Get back in the car.”

“I'm serious. I'm proud of you,” Style says as he pulls his card out. He is a gentleman, after all. He is going to pay for everything on this impromptu trip, “Regular, right? Some people think they are pampering their car by getting a higher quality than they need. It's truly unnecessary. Please tell me you're not one of those people.”

Fadel says nothing. Maybe he is that kind of person and is just embarrassed. Style won't call his boyfriend out on it.

“I got you,” Style says with a grin, “You just relax!”

“Do not use your card.”

Style lets out a scoff, “I am a gentleman! I want to pay, I mean it-”

“So that your location can be tracked through your purchases?” Fadel asks suspiciously.

Oh. Style truly didn't think of that. This is another reason he loves Fadel. He's smart.

“Well, then how else am I supposed to take care of you?” Style asks, “I mean it, Fadel! I am a mechanic! Masculine and tough. A true man! It’s in my nature to take charge-”

“I have cash,” Fadel says, getting out as well, “Walk into the store. I am right behind you. Don’t think of doing anything stupid to try and get away from me.”

“That would be stupid because that's the last thing I want to do,” Style says, putting a hand on his hip. Despite this being the honest truth, Fadel looks unimpressed and continues to look that way until they pay in cash and go back to the car. Then, Fadel gets back in the passenger seat so that Style can take control as every higher being in existence intended. He presses Regular Unleaded, lifts the nozzle, and inserts it into the jeep. He then flicks the lever so it will automatically fill the tank and walks over and rests his arms on the rolled down window before smiling at Fadel adoringly. Because that's what he truly feels. Adoration and love, even now.

Maybe especially now.

“I really do love you,” Style says gently, “I'm sorry if my initially uninformed involvement in spying on you broke your heart and made you think otherwise. This is why I wanted you to tell me about your real career yourself! I wanted to help you out of whatever life you found yourself in! We could have run away together. Fled the country. I think Japan would have been good. I could work for Toyota there. You think they’d hire me?”

Fadel still says nothing. He's a man of such few words. Then again, Style likes that. If Fadel talked as much as he did, they would be interrupting each other all the time. He wishes Fadel would talk a little more though. Share things with him. Be vulnerable with him. Fadel might need a good cry. Once that thought enters his brain, Style knows it to be true. Maybe that should be his mission, to get Fadel to have a cathartic sob-fest where Style comforts him and tries his absolute best not to crack jokes.

“I think they would hire me,” Style continues, “Pa, too. I would need to bring him with us. He really likes you, you know! He likes you better than any other guy I’ve dated and he has happened to cross paths with. I mean…it's not hard. I’ve dated a couple of assholes. But he recognizes a good person when he sees one. He even told me he approved of you and wanted you around more often. He thinks you're a good influence and that you balance me out.”

In response, Fadel points the gun at Style’s face. Style smiles and kisses the tip of it sweetly. It's only then that Fadel jerks the gun back and looks at Style as if he has lost it.

He has lost it. For Fadel. This hiccup isn't going to get in the way of what he feels. He was afraid when he woke up by the pool, but now he has come to a decision. He's spending this trip with three goals in mind.

1. Find Kant - preferably not dead or seriously injured - and ensure he makes it home safe.

2. Find Bison and talk him down. He's pretty sure Bison is more dangerous than Fadel is. His prettiness and petite stature are both incredibly disarming and work in his favor. Style respects it.

3. Make it clear to Fadel that Style is unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him, like Bella was in love with Edward in Twilight. Their relationship probably isn't even as toxic as theirs. There is no creepy, Italian vampire council or ninety year age gap, although Fadel may currently thirst for his blood. But that doesn't matter. If Bella and Edward can overcome all those things and magically conceive a child, then Style and Fadel can too.

“Why are you just staring at me? Why did you kiss my gun? What is wrong with you?”

Style snaps out of his dreamy thoughts and ambitions as he meets Fadel’s glare.

“I was just thinking of us magically conceiving a baby.”

Fadel’s glare turns into a bewildered, slightly disturbed gawk. He's warming up to him again. Style is sure of it.

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers: Character Interviews (Kant/Bison Focus)

So this proved to be super interesting. Let us see what can be gleaned from these brief little interview segments with Kant and Bison.

Immediately, I'm struck by how serious and stoic Kant comes across. He has a very mature aura, and is quite hard to read (which I guess is a plus considering what he gets up to). I didn't expect this, based on how flirty and forward he appeared to be in the trailer, and that makes me wonder if it's all part of a persona he's playing. Or whether the real Kant is in fact more measured and introspective, and Bison just brings out his playful side?

A notable trait that gets signposted repeatedly is Kant's care for his brother Babe. I believe Khao has made a similar comment about him being family-oriented. It makes a tonne of sense to me as to why Bison would be drawn to a 'family man'; someone who has strong family values, when Bison's essentially been rejected by his own.

"My goal in life is to make sure my brother grows up into a good man. I want to make sure he doesn't feel like he's lacking anything. We're all we've got right now." "I just live day by day, just keeping with my goal which is making sure my brother grows up well." This is so telling of Kant's mentality. Not only does it suggest that Kant is a stand-in parent of sorts, but that he doesn't live for himself. (Which could be something of a parallel to Bison - who is unable to live by his own rules). His goals centre entirely on his loved ones' needs being met and supporting them. This definitely gives provider with self-sacrificing tendencies.

"I feel like my goal is just to make sure my loved ones get to live their dreams. For now, I just want my brother to have a good life. But one day, if someone comes into my life and I love them, my goal would be to make sure they get to achieve their dreams." And yet another selfless, touching sentiment. The desire to aid your loved ones to actualise their dreams, possibly before or over your own. I expect Kant will be a very doting, nurturing soul. (Lucky Bison).

I wonder if Kant and Fadel will empathise with one another over their respective little brothers, and the sense of responsibility that comes with it. Bonding opportunity perhaps?

The most mysterious thing Kant says is "One more thing I'm not a big fan of is the beach." (The reason is personal). Curious. First has specifically talked about filming on the beach, where they were able to do a lot more improv. Any speculations on the above are wide open.

Now let's move onto our resident Murder Kitten. I've always said that Bison reads as a real sweetie-pie based on everything we've seen thus far. He's very animated and expressive. Khao very deliberately uses a softer, lighter vocal register as Bison, which just accentuates this cute, darling image. A real child at heart who wants to make up for a life he didn't get to lead. "I go out, I'm just trying to live outside the burger shop." His childhood dream about seeing the northern lights is just another example of a boy who has daydreamed of escape, and welcomes any excuse to be as far away from his actual life as possible. He also mentions being fond of a stray cat who resides near their burger bar, who he enjoys feeding and playing with. This precious boy, I cant. (Note: I need to have scenes of this in the show PURR-LEASE).

Everything about Bison as a person feels at odds with his violent lifestyle, which seems to be a central conflict in Bison's character arc. It does beg the question of what if Bison had never been adopted, what kind of life would he be living instead? And I think this drives Kant's desire to fight for Bison's chance at a new start. A boy with big dreams meets a man who wants to realise them. What a match.

Another comment we've heard before in the pilot is "I also don't like liars", no doubt foreshadowing the fallout when he finds out Kant did exactly that. I do think it's likely that whatever drives Kant to take the detective job has reasons to do with his own brother. He may wish to clear his record of anything untoward for his brother's sake. Based on this premise, when Bison does find out why Kant did what he did, I think that will help soothe any hard feelings.

On a side note - I've seen a comment mention that Kant apparently calls Bison 'kitten' in the novel. ERM HULLO?!! I will allow one spoiler, and that is whether this is true or not. And if so, I DEMAND that it is a featured pet name in the show, because why on earth would you miss an opportunity like that?!

You can keep tabs on bird-inacage’s BL meta directory for other long-form posts around The Heart Killers, which I'll be updating as the show airs.

[bubbipond]

My favorite character thus far is Style and let me explain why. The main reason is that he is ridiculous and being used as a foil, for now. Granted he may have more depth to come, but as of now, he’s a foil to all three main characters. The most he has in common is that he’s a liar and does what he wants. But the difference is, he doesn’t do it for some big thing that is detrimental to his livelihood. He thinks it’s some kind of game where he can be the winner and doesn’t care that it could mean hurting Fadel. In comparison to his bestie and their killer babes, Style isn’t really anything like them. He doesn’t have some huge ulterior motive that leads him to being a dick, he hasn’t gone as far as Kant to make Fadel like him, he doesn’t even have some heinous job. For the most part, he’s the most normal character we have seen so far. But how long can his character last this way? Foils don’t necessarily have to stay foils the entire story, and I’d argue, when the character isn’t a villain, they rarely stay foils. So when do we start to see this character break down?

Interestingly, his bravado only seems to work in a setting where he has the highest upper hand. Before learning the truth, he had all the juice in the world to do whatever he needed, but now he’s falling apart. Maybe all four characters have a connection or maybe Style is just meant to be the character in the story that brings in some light. Either way, he is a fun addition to a dark world. Sure, he now plans to help Kant but, how much of that is laced in actually caring about subject matter? We have already seen that he is nosy and just wants information no matter the cost (a big one at that, you dumbass). But we have yet to see Style in a place where his vulnerability plays a role in his character.

Now that he knows the truth, I believe we will start seeing his characters bravado fall apart even more. There is no way Fadel is going to be painstakingly in love just over sex and him showing up everywhere. If anything I find it suspicious that Fadel caved so fast. Kant seems to think his bestie is just shameless because that’s how he is. But I have a sneaky suspension that Style isn’t meant to be a foil for long and so I can’t wait for this character to open up more.

But also I just don’t wanna have to listen to yall complain for the 3rd year in a row that dunk is such a terrible actor because it’s exhausting. And quite frankly some of yall be in his comments being bullies but that’s all imma say about that. 🤡

[foundhomehere]

I don't believe in Fadel's confession or him agreeing to being Style's boyfriend that easily.

First things first, he was telling Bison against dating literally like a day ago, and then suddenly someone like Fadel becoming someone's boyfriend is definitely sus.

Also before this scene, he was actually mad at Style for showing up to the grief support group, yet again. Not to forget that he brought Style all the way to the woods and disappeared for a good while before the whole "confession" happened.

Also as per his words, he "hated having to miss Style". However, at the gym scene later he was absolutely unfazed and unbothered that Style insisted on leaving suddenly (the same Style who has been all up Fadel's business all this time).

picture receipts as added:

It's not possible that he'd not even question this act of Style once but be calm about it.

Also, Fadel as a character is not that simple. He has closed off thinking with his heart a long time ago, knowing how it can negatively affect (and potentially endanger) his life. For him to suddenly be all lovey and emotional with a person he doesn't really trust, is beyond his character. Not to forget the fact that he knows Style and Kant are friends, and he 100% doesn't trust Kant, no matter what Bison says. Oh and also, with Keen looking out in whatever Fadel Bison does (and Fadel knowing this), you'd bet Fadel will be a lot more careful than we are show in today's episode.

And in the end, this damn expression of his. The slight subtle smirk. This man is not blind in love. He knows what he is doing and knows what he wants.

In conclusion, Kant should not be overconfident about his plans and actually be careful & mindful of what he is doing. Cause let's be honest even if they are in on the same plan, Style's chances of surviving Fadel Bison's wrath is much higher than Kant.

[fadelstylist]

Can't even talk about how sad and offended I am for how the characters handled the situation with Kant. I understand that Style wants to save his friend and that Kant wants to save himself (even if I don't believe a single word he says) but I'm so mad at Bison.

Why does he keep thinking it's all about him? Kant offended both. Not only Bison. He can't choose what Fadel is allowed to feel after all the problems he caused.

1. Kant almost sent him and Bison to jail. Yes, this betrayal affects Fadel too because it's more than a love story.

2. Kant put Style in danger, facing extreme situations (like getting shot) as consequences of Kant's lies. And yes, I know Style ended up accepting but he literally didn't have other options because Kant said "he can kill you if you leave now" and then "you are all I have".

3. Kant's plan triggered Fadel's past trauma and fears of:

a. Letting people in.

b. Betrayal.

c. Losing someone he loves.

Even if he could heal from a and b, he still needs to suffer from the c. Because, he knew since the beginning of the show, why he shouldn't dream of love. Because his lifestyle doesn't let him, because if you love someone you don't put them in danger. He can still lose Style and the cycle will start over and over again. It's crazy how little this show cares about mental health. Bison's is non-existent.

And after all of that, Bison decides that he will still put himself first, and make this whole scene (which is a clear emotional reaction after all the trauma) about himself as if this was always about not letting him get a boyfriend. It was never about that. The audacity of pointing a gun to Fadel and say "It's my life" as if it wasn't Fadel's too. Did Bison ever care about Fadel? Because Style is the only person who respects his feelings. Did he ever think about him when he did all of this? He literally ran away out of anger to "kill" Kant and didn't even tell him where. He not only didn't kill Kant but also teamed up with him.

And then he only says "I'm sorry, I was angry".

It's crazy.

Then you can tell me Bison isn't selfish and self-centered. How can't he never think about Fadel after doing anything? And when he could, he just pointed a gun at him because he chose himself. And let me tell you: Bison never had enough reasons to believe Kant was truthful. Fadel has reasons to believe because he knows that, somewhere in the middle, Style didn't even know about all of this (not to mention that their development was more realistic and coherent). Why still choosing Kant over Fadel? And I know it's not like he would've killed him but that action was a whole statement.

And even after all of the things Fadel had to face for Bison, he still chooses Bison. Fadel celebrated Bison's birthday (while being angry and hurt) and decided to forgive Kant. What Bison ever did for Fadel? He's just ungrateful for his protection.

It felt so wrong to see how Bison never take any of Fadel's feelings seriously. Like he doesn't matter because he's just a sad and bored brother. He probably doesn't know about any of the things Fadel went through because Fadel only told some stuff to someone who proved to care about him. And that's Style. And that's why I think Style was right when he said he's the only one who really wants the best for him.

Fadel was mocked off again during the "almost shooting" Kant scene. Whatever hurt Fadel felt, it doesn't matter because we only care about Bison's. Fadel gets to put the gun down and make some joke????? about the seafood????? And then you want to tell me the show takes Fadel's feelings serious? I literally can't rewatch that scene because I can't stand it. It feels so wrong. So much hurt untold and unhealed for the sake of the "plot".

[deliriousblue]

there's so much in bison's reaction to kant in the caddie scene. we don't see kant explain his plan in detail before putting it into action — there isn't time — but it becomes clear very quickly, and really how many options were there anyway?

but seeing kant perform a point for point mimicry of the way he hit on bison that first night at the bowling alley — if not quite as overtly sexualized, of course explainable by any number of contextual distinctions — what is even going through bison’s mind there. i think the amount of jealousy probably is not literally zero but i don’t think that’s really the center of it.

especially when the show’s literal opening scene was bison on a honeypot mission, which he later tells fadel explicitly he doesn’t want to repeat. bison watching kant flirt with someone else the exact same way he flirted with bison, bison watching kant do a honeypot (adjacent?) mission same as bison has been ordered to, bison watching kant do all of this for bison…..so much wrapped up in there all at once.

and then the scene in the pool. bison opening with a comment on kant always being charming and kant teasingly asking if he’s jealous (always going for deflection!). again i do think there’s any jealousy involved there but it isn't about just that. it's about bison knowing exactly what these kinds of missions are like, knowing exactly what lilly is asking, realizing that this cannot be the first time kant has done this. and kant saying ‘our next job will be easy’ in light of all that….

thinking too about how this time it isn't just kant pushing his own desires and preferences to the side but explicitly lilly as well. (i am once again asking. does bison even know that that night in the bowling alley happened before kant had his marching orders? does it matter?)

and so bison gives kant an out; says he and fadel can manage from there. and i think kant's answer is in some sense just as predetermined as anything else he's done (he's already told bison that as far as he's concerned whatever happens to them they'll do together) but it matters that this time it's his choice and it matters that bison cares about giving it to him.

[massy2ly]

PART 1: Let’s talk about what i would love to see in episode 9 with Style, because there’s so much potential brewing here. (PART 2 is about KantStyle)

First off, I love my chaotic baby Style—sass, unhinged charm, and all—but maybe it’s time for him to dial it down just a notch. That wild, unpredictable personality is exactly what makes him who he is, and honestly, it’s why we root for him so hard. But if he really wants Fadel to take his feelings seriously, he’ll need to show another side of himself—one that proves he’s more than just sparkles and antics.

That doesn’t mean his attitude in episode 8 was wrong. Far from it. What Style did in ep 8 was perfect as the first step in cracking through Fadel’s icy defenses. Before he could even start unloading all those big feelings or fighting for Fadel’s heart, Style had to remind him that the man he fell for is real. No masks, no pretending. The same Style who flirted shamelessly and annoyed the life out of Fadel when they first met is the same man standing there now—loud, brave, and utterly unapologetic—even with a gun in his face. Fadel needed to see that. And judging by his confused, flabbergasted reactions throughout the episode, it’s working. You could practically hear him thinking, “This guy is crazy. He’s really like this. Even now, he’s still treating me like he always has, driving me up the wall.”

But now that the groundwork has been laid, the people saying Style should get a little more serious in episode 9 aren’t wrong. The first step is done—Fadel’s clearly more at ease around him—but now comes the heavy lifting. Like Bison said in the preview, Style needs to prove his love in a way that goes beyond the playful energy we’ve seen so far. This isn’t about throwing himself at Fadel like he did in the early episodes. Lust might’ve been enough to break through when Fadel wasn’t interested, but now? Now Fadel is deeply in love with him and is so hurt that he has a hard time looking him in the eyes. Ofc, the man still clearly wants Style and knows that Style is aware of that—look at that moment in the bathtub when he avoided the kiss. But Fadel’s heart is in the mix now, and with that comes pain, mistrust, and a mountain of unresolved feelings.

Words alone aren’t going to cut it here. Fadel’s already made it clear that talk is cheap to him—he’s an actions-speak-louder kind of guy. Style’s going to need to show, not just tell, that he’s serious. And honestly? I’m not too worried. If the preview’s anything to go by, Style’s already set to put his heart on the line in a way that proves he’s not playing around.

Still, I hope we get to see more of that vulnerable, earnest side of him too. I want some talking too. That’s why I adored their dance scene in episode 8. For a moment, we saw Style getting real—no jokes, no distractions—and Fadel listening, even if he was holding on to his fear and mistrust. There was hope there too, and love, buried under all the hurt. I want more of that—more conversations where Style lets his guard down and speaks from the heart. Because as much as I love his playful, messy personality, Fadel deserves words to match the actions. Words that show he’s serious, that he’s in this for the long haul, and that he’s willing to do whatever it takes to heal the rift between them.So yeah, let Style stay Style—flirtatious, loud, and uniquely him—but give Fadel the serious love confession he deserves. Actions may prove love, but the right words can be just as powerful. Kant knows a thing or two about that, lol.

[ropebunnykant]

Your post about Babe makes me think this is a safe space to vent briefly! I love this show dearly, it's hands down my fave show of last year, I foresee much rewatching in the future, and though it's clearly imperfect, up until now those imperfections haven't interfered with my enjoyment. But - and maybe it's because there's only one ep left so the prospect of certain things/conversations happening is looking increasingly unlikely, or maybe it's because for the first time I felt the screentime/writing apportioned to each couple this ep felt noticeably unbalanced - post ep-11, I'm feeling a little wistful/frustrated at opportunities missed. Babe is a super obvious one - it feels like Style's dad has had more screentime than him, and even though Style's dad is awesome, in terms of importance to plot/character motivation, Babe clearly comes out on top, and yet as you mentioned, the writing hasn't really reflected that. But I think Kant and Kant/Bison in general have sporadically been curiously underwritten - in their post-truth scenes, imo, they've never really been given the space to explore their feelings to the same depth that Fadel has. And I think I just sort of ignored it before cos all the other stuff (not just the kissing!) was so delicious, but then in this ep, the contrast tween the burger joint scene and the tattoo scene (which seemed almost truncated) just felt so stark that it thwacked me over the head. The obvious exception is the beach scene (and maybe the swing scene?), the meat of which we now know was improvised. Which makes me wonder if it's partly because they think they can get away with it or don't feel they need to write as much detail cos FK are there to do the heavy lifting for them? And yes, FK can speak volumes with eye contact alone cos they really are That Good, but some stuff DOES actually have to be verbalised!!! And I'm not necessarily saying their scenes needed a lot more dialogue, but maybe just to be given a little more time to breathe? I remember thinking that about the opening of ep 9 with the memory box - yes, the deflection and flirting is probably in-character to a degree and most definitely the latter is a lot of fun to watch, but even just giving them a moment longer to reflect on their pain/loss before they diverted to daddy kink would've made a big difference imo.

Again, I can't necessarily point at anything in particular and say that's what should've been cut out to make room for xyz, so maybe it really is just a matter of not quite having enough eps to fully cover all the material they were working with (think that's definitely the case with Keen and Lilly, but they are fundamentally side characters, and it's side characters who always get shafted! Whereas Kant/Bison...). And yes, again, that's what fic's for, I know that. But still...the what ifs are always the worst! What if we got actual onscreen acknowledgement from another character that Kant, too, has been a victim of grooming/coercion/exploitation/whatever you want to call it, and also deserves to engineer a reckoning for the person responsible (and I'm not counting the blackmail scene cos he's still not in a position of power there given the stakes)? What if we got Bison bringing up their first encounter (since there's absolutely no reason for him to think it wasn't part of the scam) and Kant getting the chance to reassure him that night was 100% real? What if we got recognition from Fadel that Kant is basically just another tired older brother doing what it takes to protect his nong? What if we got actual follow-through on the Captain's threats after Kant returned from their torture island getaway? Imagine the parallel we could have had tween him coming home in ep 7 to find Babe with Bison vs. him coming home in ep 10 to find Babe with the Captain! What if we got just one scene where Kant finally gets to be the one who breaks down and is comforted? What if we got anything explicitly BDSM-related (okay maybe still holding out hope for this one!)? Now I'm more than happy to eat my hat if any of that comes to pass in the finale, and don't get me wrong, I'm still very much enamoured with the show and with these characters and am delighted at the prospect of prison hijinks cos I thought we'd be getting a time skip! And tbh the main reason I want to vent is just to get it out of my system so I can return to my previous state of blissful indifference to the niggles and the quibbles! ...Which is really unfair on you, I am realising at this late stage in the game! So apologies for the (tempered, not full-blown!) negativity and if you'd rather steer clear feel free to delete and ignore! I do think part of it is just the risk you run watching a show week to week when there's SO MUCH TIME to speculate and analyse and headcanon - you're virtually always going to be disappointed in one aspect or another, whereas when you binge-watch there's just no time for expectations to even be formed let alone undershot! But then of course you lose out on the sheer bananas entertainment and mass hysteria that is the collective experience of watching something real-time, and, after all (at least for those of us on tumblr I suspect!) the obsessive speculation/analysis/headcanoning is a large part of the fun!

first of all, i'm glad you consider this a safe place to vent and i totally get having frustrations about certain choices and what not, i obviously have vented my own about the whole situation with babe and the way it could have been very easily handled differently. which, my main gripe with that is that it was a very easy change to make, and a lot of my other complaints about this show i feel in general just come from them not having enough time. the babe situation would have been very easily solvable had they thrown in even ONE line referencing that kant had called babe and he was fine. no need for a whole scene or anything that would take up too much time! just a brief mention, maybe in the scene when kant checks in on style in ep9, and style asks if he's gotten to call babe. that is literally all i would have needed to feel better about that situation.

however, truthfully i don't feel like there's actually that much of a disparity in terms of how kantbison are written versus how fadelstyle are, especially not in ep11, but i have seen this take a couple of times now! i can understand why it may come across that way because fadel and style were having a lot of vulnerable conversations, whereas kant and bison weren't as much, however, i also think it comes down to what each of the brothers needed on that last day. fadel does not trust as easily as bison does, he has a LOT of self doubt and fears that style will leave. what fadel needed on his last day was the reassurance that style was gonna be there and that he wasn't gonna leave while he was in prison.

whereas bison, i feel like he needed the hope of them having that future outside of that one night. it's why he and kant talked about getting married and traveling and talked about their dreams when they were younger. we also have to remember that bison and kant reconciled a whole episode before fadel and style did, so of course they had more time to have those conversations - which we do get to see between ep8, 9, and 10. they have plenty of conversations about their past, about their future, plenty of moments reassuring and affirming their relationship. fadel and style i think are kind of playing catch up before they have to be separated in that regard, which is why it seems more unbalanced. i'm sure if you asked someone that was more into fadelstyle, they'd probably say that ep8 and 9 felt unbalanced but for fadelstyle in that regard. we have to remember these couples and these characters are not only different from one another, but in different places.

and look, that's not me saying that there aren't things i DO wish we'd gotten to see kant and bison talk about more, and i do certainly have my complaints about the fact that firstkhao had to improvise most of the reconciliation scene. i just also think because kant and bison had a lot more lies and deception between them, it's going to feel more like we're missing things when they DON'T talk about things on screen, and i again think a lot of the things we haven't seen have been an unfortunate fact of them not having enough time for everything. cause like i would have loved to see everything you mentioned here, especially kant getting the chance to have a proper breakdown cause he deserves it. i do think it's possible we'll get some of those things next week, though, as i am for sure holding out for another proper bdsm scene until the final moments

i think in general final judgements do kind of need to wait until the show is over because if we don't have a full picture, how can we really judge? that being said, i do adore this show even with the complaints i have and what i would want to see, and while watching live can be stressful and lead to some disappointment and fandom wars, it is VERY fun to get to watch and analyze and theorize live so i really wouldn't change it for the world sjdskjf

[includedisco]

FadelStyle Short One-shot 2

Title: Knocked up (By Reality)

Characters: Fadel, Style

Pairing: Fadel/Style

Fandom: The Heart Killers

Tags: Fluff, Post canon, Established relationship, POV alternating, Domestic fluff, The fic is literally Style trying to convince Fadel to get him pregnant, Domestic boyfriends, pregnancy discussion, Sex talk, Implied/referenced sex, Flirting

warnings: none

Word Count: 778

Summary: Style just wants to get pregnant, okay? If only Fadel would cooperate

or

Style just wants Fadel to understand that if they try hard enough, one of them can get pregnant

“I mean if we tried hard enough-”

“Stop it!” Fadel cuts off the rest of whatever Style wants to say. 

“-we can do it.” Style continues like he hasn’t just been interrupted. He is casually seated on the countertop in Fadel’s kitchen, absently swinging his legs while watching Fadel wash vegetables at the sink.  

“You can’t get pregnant.” Fadel gently reminds his boyfriend, briefly glancing at him.  

Style pouts, “You’re supposed to support my dreams. That’s what good boyfriends do.”

A faint, amused smile plays at the corners of Fadel’s lips. “I’m far from good boyfriend material. You’ve known that about me from the start.”

“Are you just saying that to discourage me from wanting your babies? It won’t work.” 

Fadel finishing his work at the sink, the sound of running water ceasing as he turns off the tap. After drying his hands, he takes a few steps towards his boyfriend and steps between his parted knees, wrapping his arms around Style’s soft and small waist that’s peeking out from under his crop top.

“Why do you want to get pregnant so bad?” Fadel interrogates

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“You want to carry our child?”

“What? No.” Style refutes quickly and vehemently, visibly surprising Fadel

“What then?” Fadel asks with a furrowed eyebrow and slightly tilted head, eyes wide with a mix of confusion and curiosity.

“Pregnancy glow would look amazing on me. I mean, I look this good now, so imagine how irresistible I’ll be in these streets.”

Fadel shakes his head with a grin, unable to supress his amusement at the ridiculousness of this entire conversation. Fadel’s hands slide up from Style’s waist to delicately cup his face. He kisses Style on the lips, intending to stop him from saying any more nonsense.

Style’s hands instinctively rest on Fadel’s waist as he tips his head back, deepening the kiss.

As they pull apart, Style wraps his arms around Fadel’s neck, saying, “Shall we get me pregnant on this kitchen counter or shall we go somewhere more comfortable? I’m actually not that picky. I might look soft and princess-y, but I’m quite hard. Note the pun there.” Style gives his boyfriend a salacious smile and a wink.

 “We’re not having sex in my kitchen and stop talking about babies. You’re a boy.” Fadel’s eyebrows knit together, lips pressed into a thin line, and eyes narrowed with disapproval.

 “My determination is bigger than my limitations. If we add your determination to mine, I really think we can get this done.”

Fadel can’t help but chuckle, despite himself. “That’s not how that works.”

“Biology is overrated.”

“Biology is a fact.”

“So, no?” Style asks with a crestfallen look on his face.

Fadel almost feels bad about disappointing Style even though the entire thing is ridiculous to begin with, but he shakes his head. “No.” he gently kisses Style’s forehead, his lips lingering for a moment before moving to his pouting lips. The kiss is soft, something Fadel hopes will console his boyfriend.

Silence.

“Then let me get you pregnant.” Style suggests

Fadel lets out a heavy sigh, his shoulders slumping as his eyes soften with a sense of defeat. Slowly, he reaches for Style’s forearms, gently sliding them away from his neck. With a final, weary glance, Fadel steps away announcing that he’s going to get some ingredients from the pantry.

Style jumps off the counter and follows Fadel into the pantry while still talking.

“How about this? You keep doing what you do in bed and I’ll do the rest.”

Fadel shakes his head because what the fuck is wrong with his boyfriend. “What does that mean?”

Style ignores the question and goes on to rant about the next thing. “For starters, we need a strategy. I looked up the best sex positions for baby-making. I know that you hate missionary but we have to put it back on the table.”

Fadel stops abruptly, style almost ramming into him. “Enough! Say one more word about getting pregnant and I’ll throw you out of my kitchen.”

Style obeys for all the 10 seconds it lasts before he suddenly says, “After we already had hot sex in a storeroom in the past, you expect me to believe you came in here for ingredients?” Style smirks. “Admit it, you think it’s hot that I want you to get me pregnant. You want to do it in here, don’t you?”

Fadel groans in torment, the sound echoing through the room.

Style laughs out loud. At this point he’s just fucking with his boyfriend and he loves every second of it. Getting his grumpy boyfriend flustered and annoyed is so easy and it’s fun.

-End-

If you enjoyed this story, here is my AO3

Thank you for reading☺️

[secriden]

Just going to cry again (see: my previous post about the parallels between the storage room scene and the abandoned factory scene) about parallels and juxtapositions in the store room scene vs the one in Styles bedroom:

Both these scenes have such a tone of desperation and are characterised by an overflowing of emotions, but in drastically opposite directions.

(Note, some of what I say in this post directly relates to concepts and themes I talked about here, so it may not wholly make sense without that context.)

The scene in the storeroom is filled with frustrated desire. Fadel kisses Style because he wants Style's body and also wants to take his frustrations at Style out on his body. He doesn't need to look Style in the eye (and in fact very intentionally only does so only in small snatches) because this isn't about a connection as much as it is about a release. Fadel's kisses come fast, hard, and are intended to bruise more than to adore.

But episode 5's scene is filled with much more quiet and tender sort of desire. Style is kissing Fadel so much more slowly and purposefully. He keeps looking back at Fadel, checking in to see how he feels and whether Fadel is enjoying it. Everything Style wanted in Episode 3, he now gives to Fadel here, pours the secrets of his knowing and choosing Fadel anyway into the way he presses his lips onto Fadel's skin. His kisses linger, they carry a weight but are somehow infinitely gentle still; Style's kisses contain a purpose that Fadel's kisses couldn't in Episode 3 because in all honesty they were relative strangers back then.

There's also the way there's such a ferocity and carelessness in the way Fadel starts the encounter in episode 3 that is juxtaposed beautifully by the slow, tender, almost hesitant way Style slides his lips onto Fadel's. Both of them are in such different headspaces, between these episodes and its especially evident in the way they care so much more about the other person's comfort and how intentionally they showed that to the audience.

There's hunger present in both scenes but what this hunger is focused on is so drastically different. In the storeroom, they're both mainly focused on a physical release; its primal and visceral but lacked emotional resonance. Fadel gives Style what he knows Style wants (that hint of danger, with the hand on his neck), but its not because he really cares about what Style wants on anything more than a physical level. In Style's bedroom, however, Fadel is drunk (intentionally and by his own design) and desperate to open himself up to Style on an emotional level. Meanwhile, Style wants that desperately too, but knows that Fadel shouldn't because of his own terrible secret. So this kiss is what they both will allow themselves - an honesty and a hunger for this deeper connection they can only share in act but not in words.

In the storeroom, Style wants Fadel to want more than his body but knows (or thinks) he can't push for it yet, so he remains passive, lets Fadel do whatever he wants, lets him turn and shove and place Style how he wants because at this point, this is all Fadel will give him. Here, Style is passive in spite of what he wants. But in the bedroom, Fadel is passive because it's what he wants; he wants to let Style do whatever he desires to and with Fadel's body. He wants to lay himself as bare as he possibly can, which is only physical, and so he does.

And because the encounter in Episode 3 lacked that emotional connection, the focus is merely their respective releases. There's a sense of two people trying to find pleasure and 'finish' while remaining emotionally disconnected despite actively having sex with each other. Because in some ways, they didn't really need each other in that moment to get there (there's actually a lot of truth in what Fadel says about it being easier to just jerk off alone). In sharp contrast, the scene in Episode 5 isn't focused on the destination but on the journey. Style is taking his time and Fadel is letting him - Style is choosing to worship Fadel's body, with his fingers, with his lips, to respond to his vulnerability with gentleness and tenderness and adoration. The goal has stopped being about finding a release, it's about allowing both these men to revel in the giving and receiving of pleasure.

The point of these scenes is to show to us the ways in which Fadel and Style have grown to care for and, dare I say it, love each other in ways that are so purposefully portrayed by showing the nature of their physical connection. Because the ways in which these scenes are the same and yet so wholly different showcases how their touches are now no longer merely tied to their senses any longer, but also to their hearts as well.

[motelroomjesus]

whooo I finished ep 4 and 5 of The Heart Killers

I still don't like Kant, I'm warming up to Bison, still obsessed with FadelStyle, and I want Style carnally.

I'm also really interested in how they're using the music and soundtrack to emphasize the emotions of some scenes.

This post is about to be longer than my usual since it's covering two eps but anyway

Spoilers under the cut !

Me when I overanalyze my BL:

First and foremost, that pat down scene in ep 4 where Fadel maintained eye contact with Kant as he searched him... How do u put that there and expect ppl to not imagine things, Jojo..... 😫 Even the goofy music in the background couldn't dissuade me from thinking they should hate fuck ☝️ but anyway

It's very obvious that while Style isn't fully committed and his feelings for Fadel are just starting to bloom, he definitely wants that man. Atp where we are in ep 4 he's obviously lusting after that man (face economy, body tea). I mean he gave him, apparently, the best sex of his life in a grief meeting storage room. He let the man cut his little crop top off. The lust of it all is so real. But I think now, after the chase, after spending more time with him, especially after hearing how Fadel was asking where he was, he's pursuing Fadel with more sincere intentions and I think he truly wants to know Fadel more. And lord have mercy, that scene in the woods.

That scene in the abandoned warehouse in the woods, aside from the iconic "I don't like that I miss you", is when I first noticed the soundtrack specifically highlighting the emotions. Now, I know soundtracks are meant to do that but I think they're doing it in a really fun way IDK They put a lighthearted cute, and low-key hopeful, little tune over a heated make out and handjob. It felt like it reflected their emotions in that moment really well and how the audience is meant to see the scene. It's not just a hot and heavy make out session because yay official, it's an indicator of a turning page, especially for Fadel. It's a signal that he can get butterflies in his stomach too, even with his enormous walls and stoic mask (defense mechanism), and I'm sticking to that interpretation. I love u my emotionally and sexually repressed little hitman.

And then Kant came in and decided NOW is the perfect time to finally tell his friend that oh yeah ur new bf is a hitman. It's not even that part that actually annoyed me, it's the little quip when Style says gunman instead of hitman. Like I'll kill u with a gun Kant. 😭

I fear I may never truly warm up to him, he is so annoying to me. 😔

Okay so ep 5, I kind of warmed up to Bison. He's cute he's fun, he's totally ignoring his instincts about Kant even tho he knows better. He seems less than helpful in most scenarios though, but whatever

There were two scenes that caught my attention and they were obviously meant to:

1) Kant and Bison post coital cuddles

2) Style and Fadel's intimacy towards the end of the ep

I'm mostly talking about the music again and the intentional use (or absence) of it. During the KantBison scene, when Bison is being so gentle with his kisses and telling Kant tender words, the music reaches a subtle crescendo once Bison says he feels like his life is changing since he met Kant and the camera lands right in Kant's distressed face. It was a great way to signal that Kant is gonna face the music very soon. I found that fun and I had to rewind a couple times just to make sure I wasn't making it up in my head. Could just be a transition sound choice, but I'm reading into it.

The KantBison scene felt like a big contrast next to the FadelStyle scene to me. At this point I think they're both feeling more than they're letting on for each other. Fadel and Style's night is, mostly, quiet. There's no backtrack for the most part. Fadel is splayed out in the bed just watching Style take his shirt off, exposing himself more than Fadel, and caging Fadel in by crawling on top of him. Style is on top of him kissing him, doing what he wants to, and Fadel is letting him. Style is telling Fadel that he wants to be trusted, he wants more from Fadel and he's willing to wait for him to be ready. He means it. And I know there's the component of this all starting for some car and Style now being aware of the reality of the situation but I think that's the point. That's the point of doing this specific scene with the absence of a backtrack until Style starts getting actually frisky. When Style is saying all of this and kissing Fadel's scar, we only listen to his words, their breathing, and their kisses. It's bare bones, but that's the point. To bare it all.

Did I read into that too much? Maybe! but idgaaaaffff. I'm eating this shit up and having fun dissecting things that maybe don't need dissecting. :P

I think it's obvious I'm more invested in FadelStyle than KantBison.... zorry! They put me-targeted drugs in FadelStyle. It's not my fault. 🧍

[ae-azile]

Fadel/Style "One-Shot" (or probably longer 🙄) Idea

Impulsive one-shot idea that I should not start because I am that person with 59496492 WIPs. But here is the general idea:

Three years into Fadel's and Bison's sentence, their relationships with Style and Kant are still surprisingly strong. Style and Kant visit every Wednesday, volunteer on Saturdays and Sundays, and write and send packages so often that they rarely come back to their cell empty handed when the mail arrives. It's hard, but they are past the halfway point and this is finally starting to feel doable.

And then - on visiting day - Style doesn't show up. Fadel doesn't get called back to the visitation room like he always does. Bison does, but Fadel is left alone. He tries his best to not be upset. He has told Style countless times he does not have to come every single visiting day, especially now that he's volunteering. But it's the first day he has ever missed and he never even gave Fadel a head's up. When Bison comes back, he just says that Kant told him Style isn't feeling well and that he's very sorry he couldn't be here. That worries Fadel enough and makes him feel guilty. He spends the rest of the week beating himself up over not being able to tend to Style while he gets over a virus. He's hoping that Style will call. That way, Fadel can let him know to just take it easy until he is completely better and to not feel guilty if he can't visit until that happens.

But he doesn't call. When Fadel gets a turn with the phone, Style doesn't answer. He tries again the following day with the same result. He tries not to assume the worst. Style is sick, so maybe he just isn't up for talking. He just wishes Style would tell him that, even if it is croaked out and they aren't on the phone for more than thirty seconds. Fadel would take it, because he is now jumping to other conclusions.

Maybe Style met someone else. Fadel always told him he could and that he would understand. That always resulted in Style throwing a fit and calling and writing even more, just to tell Fadel off for undermining his love and devotion. Sometimes, Fadel will get multiple letters in one day when Style is riled up like that. He finally got to a point where he understands that Style isn't going anywhere.

But if he isn't answering Fadel's calls, maybe that has changed.

When Saturday comes along and Kant arrives to volunteer, Style is nowhere in sight. Since he can't talk to Style, he corners Kant. He does his best to be reasonable. He even tells Kant he won't be mad if Style found someone else. He just needs to know so he isn't left wondering.

Kant doesn't tell him much of anything. All he does is look at Fadel sadly and hand him a letter. As soon as Fadel finds a private area so he can read it and not become targeted if he bursts into tears, he's glad that he did. It's a single page, just one, long paragraph. He's used to Style writing at least three pages front and back. But he still gets his point across.

I was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia last week. Same as my ma. My 5 year survival rate is about 30%. I am in the hospital now, but I will come back as soon as I am out if you still want to see me. If you don't, I completely understand. I'm sorry I'm not telling you in person, and I'm sorry I didn't answer the phone. It just isn't looking good, and I didn't know how to say it without trying to make light of it. That pisses Pa off, and I figured it would piss you off too. I don't know when I will be discharged. I also don't know when I will lose my hair. Probably soon. Fuck. I don't know if I can pull it off. Whatever. My sex appeal had a good run. Kant can give you updates on that and everything else if you get curious. Again, I understand that you probably don't want to be a part of this. Just write, tell Kant, or give me a call. As long as I am awake, I promise to answer this time. I've been sleeping a lot, but I told Pa to watch my phone Saturday and Sunday in case you do call so he can wake me up.

I love you,

Style

Or...

Style gets diagnosed with cancer while Fadel is in prison and has a bleak prognosis. Fadel feels like his world is completely falling apart as he becomes more and more desperate to find a solution.

I hate it when I get one-shot ideas, especially depressing ones like this LOL. And also, idk if I could make this work as a one-shot. It will probably be very angst heavy if I ever do start it, and I have several KinnPorsche fics I need to get back to. But if anyone is interested in seeing where this could lead, feel free to let me know!