#FUCK CONSERVATORSHIP ABUSE !!!!

[cringefail-clown]

hateful gaze

[monalisaspears]

BELIEVE MICHAEL OHER!!!!!!

END CONSERVATORSHIP ABUSE!!!!!!!!

[never-quite-buried]

There will be a documentary released soon by TMZ about Britney Spears “post-conservatorship” and i would humbly ask all fans of Britney Spears to NOT watch it. There is clearly a directed attack at Britney’s mental well-being taking place and it is with every effort to lock her in a permanent care plan.

The conservatorship was an illegal and unethical breach of her civil liberties and make no mistake, she is still locked in it. Court documents from mere months ago list her as conservatee and they are in the process of assigning a conservator again to lead her “care plan”.

Britney told us all with no ambiguity that she had every intention of suing every person who harmed her. She told us in her court audio and self posted audios to instagram that her family was “trying to kill [her]”. She had a book slated to release and tmz reported this past holiday that there was a “paper shortage” while the publisher released plenty of other books in the same time and now we’re learning that two celebs are attempting to block its release. At every stop they have silenced her right to speak and move freely.

For some reason we’re not seeing the real Britney out and about and now they’re claiming she’s not fit to hold knives?! They want full control of the person and the estate again and they plan to win it in the court of public opinion.

Boycott this documentary. Britney hates documentaries made without her say or her commentary, don’t let TMZ continue to spew this narrative when they are directly responsible for her suffering.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

cannot get over the IMPLICATIONS of that 'armand was telling the truth' tattoo like:

-in universe fandom for the book

-potentially armand has come out of this whole situation once again portrayed as an innocent victim, and this time he didn't even have to work for it. none of the readers have even gazed into his big beautiful eyes!!!

- everyone thinks lestat is cosplaying as lestat. dear God do you think the armand girls are constantly @ -ing him and daniel on twitter bringing up copyright laws

- do you think daniel has publicly threatened to sue lestat. I Know he has.

- the author, who is perceived to be having an end of life cunty gay era, is convinced to interview the rock star who's cosplaying as his famous character. you KNOW. you KNOW the girls are rooting for them to fuck each other

- discourse about how a hashtag real artist would create their OWN character to embody and also isn't it a red flag that he's idolizing an abusive murderer?!?!?!?! boycott the new album guys!!!

- louis and armand and sam all have burner accounts to constantly shitpost about the book

- claudia girlies showing up to a concert with fanart of her on all of their posters and he has a public breakdown but everyone just thinks it's a regular drug scandal

- anyone remember the armie hammer cannibal situation. yeah.

- lestat says onstage that he ships loustat and he gets booed by even his most loyal fans

- small sector of fans that ship louis and daniel and they refuse to make eye contact about it

- daniel's daughters publicly try to have him committed more than once and some fans preemptively start a gofundme in case his daughters try and get a conservatorship

- (armand donates) (the fans don't even know daniel personally the whole thing is a scam)

- armand prints out and dramatically gazes at any and every piece of fanart drawn of him

- lestat projects hate comments on a screen at his show but like half of the hate comments are by people who think they're talking about a fictional character

- this is getting away from me. I DO wanna see louis in a mosh pit dressed slutty and covered in glitter tho

[raincoat-movings]

My abusive mother is trying to institutionalize me & put me in a conservatorship. Please help me fund my escape plan across a few states.

This is a remake of my original post that lost traction as it gained over 4k notes, but I still need help. Things have gone to shit I need to get the fuck out of here as soon as possible. That means the moving fee will be much more, but if we can get enough I am going to go for it as soon as May (I have to give a 30-day notice to my current landlord before I can leave) or June instead of my original post's estimate.

My mother has sold her house and is bringing her pets to the new house, but she is leaving my cat behind with the new owners knowing that will upset me. She gave me a few options - move in with her and I can keep him in my room, I can let her leave him with strangers whom I don't know or know what they'll end up doing with him, or I can pay the pet deposit on my current apartment of 350 dollars to have him with me instead. I would like to have my cat back as I have been alone in this apartment since I moved, and I am so afraid of her giving him to strangers and something happening to him before I can take him with me when I can move.

Since she is moving she has also informed me today she is also giving me another choice - move in with her to keep rides or stay in my current apartment and not have rides to the grocery store + doctors. Insurance can help me with the issue of the appointments, but I need rides to the city next to me as the town I live in has no store with decent prices on food. Everything is priced to hell here - I used to ride with my mom to Costco or Walmart where I could get a lot out of my food stamps - those are out of my reach without a car. (We do not have public transportation here. It is a small town. We don't even get pizza delivery here unless it's from doordash the city next to us.) As stated in the original post I will be renting an apartment with my beloved, but they are 3 states away so this is not going to be cheap. I am getting my stuff professionally moved as I cannot make the trip myself as it would cost more, be worse on my body, things can happen with me being alone, it will not be insured, etc.

Again, I am so sorry for having to remake this post I am sure many of you are tired of seeing me pop up on here, but I want my cat back + this is getting very fucking bad so I need to get out of here soon as I can.

paypal: partange1 cashapp: par1demon wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/37P45EQYVHZZT?ref_=wl_share <- This has cat, medical (I am disabled + get injured a lot), and packing supplies you can directly buy for me in case you can't donate through paypal or cashapp

[sharonisthebettercarter]

Well the comics did a good job squandering any sympathy and shiz for dicklander, and the show too. I only feel bad for his child self. His grown ass can get attacked by rabid kryptonian dogs for all I care.

i disagree.

and look, i ain't gonna tell you how to feel boo, i can't obviously. i can only spew out nonsense and hope i might reach you or someone else who comes along to read my long winded bullshit.

but while both renditions are pieces of shit, i feel so much for comics homie too if not more. he's even more whoobie than show homie but gets dismissed but i digress.

throughout the story, we're made to feel *suspicious* about the claims on homelander or that his story may have more than meets the eye. ennis presents it point blank. he doesn't tell the reader how to feel about homelander, or anything, or anyone. he makes it clear how billy feels, how other characters feel, but he also certainly makes it show that things aren't quite adding up about him and billy's claim. he presents the story and lets *you* the reader feel (which is what real *good* writing does)

BUT it's framed out in a way to make the reader realize he *wasn't* this big bad awful guy he was made out to be, a piece of shit sure, but and not the real monster they were after, that billy was fuckin' wrong (like his dumb ass always is), that his end and final point in the story was manipulated, coerced by outside force, and not truly justified as a result.

leik, this guy got his WHOLE LIFE fucking RUINED, his whole self image, gaslit into fucking oblivion to *believe* he was a bad guy until he *became* a bad guy, after literally never once getting a *choice* for anything, ever, at all, at any point in his whole gotdamn life.

this boi never had a chance... and even after ALL that. people STILL want to control or punish him when he lacks one major vital thing that would warrant him *actually* deserving that.

AGENCY. fucking agency, the answer is agency, homelander has none of it, never has, and still does not have it. (he pretends to but it's not quite the same, the lack of it is what makes him a ticking time bomb)

you seem like someone to really value your own agency so idk, i feel like you should get that??

BUT GOTDAMN LET THE BOI JUST FUCKING BREATHE AT LEAST ONCE PLEASE????

UGH

just try to imagine if every single choice in your life was made *for you* by *someone else*, and that's homelander. and it doesn't stop into adulthood, it just turns into a fucking fucked up conservatorship beside someone who wants to kill you, oh yeah, and stunted growth so you never get a chance to really grow up and feel like or be your own person either.

like i'm not kidding, he might as well be a child STILL in that regard and it is super fucked up how often people exploit and groom him that way. i don't care if he's fucking 16, 40, or in his 70s, the man *ain't* grown like he should be and *needs* the space to actually *grow* before we decide to fucking judge him, else we're no better than his abusers.

and when a kid commits a crime, it's the parents/guardians that are brought up on charges/trial. there is a *reason* for that.

homelander's very clear lack of sanity/mental capacity and vought being his 'guardian'/conservator?? (if he even is a real legal person...) would put him under this spectrum of bullshit, and baby i don't want to say it's ableist not to acknowledge this, but...

i mean if i'm being real, it kinda sorta is...?? wait... HOLD THE--- FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!! OH MY FUCKING SATAN--it IS!! and I JUST GOT WHIPLASH FROM WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE BOYS FANDOM WHEN IT COMES TO HOMELANDER.

this motherfucker is *CRIMINALLY INSANE*, emphasis on that last fucking part, in every sense of the word *CLINICALLY*. and when that happens, even the fucking laws in the fucked ol' U.S. of A. DO NOT 'punish' a mofo by regular 'incarceration', they still order institutionalization but with a HOSPITAL for TREATMENT. (granted there are a whole mess of other problems in this country that still do not handle this properly jesus fucking christ--)

ABLEISM! it's fucking ableism that doesn't let fandom recognize this!! EVEN some of the people who claim to love him!!

except THEN make it WORSE on top of everything *because* of the stunted growth and vought AND limited personal agency and... fuck me... UGGGGGGHHHHHHH--

but THAT is homelander. and uh... yeah. yeah, you'd probably lose your gotdamn mind too, i don't think ANYONE could walk out sane, realistically speaking. pain is easy to say we'd walk out clean from, and then we all turn into pussies the *second* it's our turn to deal.

and the whole point of the twist is to rob you of any satisfaction of his death and make you angry at his circumstances rather than at him. again, ennis doesn't explicitly *tell* readers how to feel because it's more of a graphic novel but...

i personally think the show is aiming to recreate this effect because if they can pull it off (and manage to make an entire population feel like utter ableist shitheads for wanting him dead), then they'll be pulling off some kinda magical MAJOR amazing heist of the feels for the ages that will *hopefuly* be enough to push society in some better directions than its current state (man, we really could not have asked for a better time for this series... holy shit--)

as much as it pains me, *this* was why he was killed in the comics. not just for... ugh, sadness, realism... but because it was *part* of the lesson in exemplifying what was actually wrong.

man i am just way too fucking hyper analytical with this shit and also sometimes SO SLOW i--

[yelena-bellova]

You had the audacity to pretend to be a feminist and care about Pamela Anderson, yet you can't recognize a powerful male abuser like Depp playing by the oldest rules in the book and utilizing DARVO. We are so fucked.

You’re right. The true feminists are you guys.

- Telling Rihanna to go choke and d*e because she put JD in the Fenty show.

- Telling Britney Spears her conservatorship should be reinstated for posting a JD quote on IG and that she deserves to have all her rights taken away.

- Cheering online when a female JD supporter succumbed to a long illness.

- Harassing numerous women online and telling them (anonymously) that they deserve to be SA’d and to k*ll themselves.

- Sending threats to Camille Vasquez, a young woman of color succeeding in a predominantly male profession.

Wow. The girl power is overwhelming.

[trillscienceofficer]

I saw you said in the tags that you don't agree with Seven being about 13 etc, and I could not agree more because it irks me so much when people say how Seven was mentally 6 when they freed her from the Borg, or something to that effect. She was abused by the Borg to the point of not having her own thoughts but she still aged. Maybe she struggled socially after she was freed from that but it didn't take away the years she spent in the collective. It's basically infantilizing and paired with Seven being perceived as autistic by some, or just the fact that she went though the trauma of being Borg, is ableism to me. End of rant.

I apologize for not replying sooner to this ask but I wanted to grab a couple of links before replying because yes, I think you're totally right that saying anything to that effect (that Seven is actually a child, or that 'she doesn't actually know what's best for her') is infantilization of a character who is canonically a physically disabled adult, as well as having a very strong subtext for neurodivergence, and that it plays into ableist stereotypes that contribute to making the lives of real disabled people tangibly worse.

First, I want to make clear that no matter how muddled the metaphors get when it comes to Seven (and oh boy do they, between the cyborg technobabble and the completely absurd way Seven was "dressed" and made up on Voyager, talking about her is always a struggle), she is disabled. She makes use of many prosthetics and she has to regenerate (ie she has to make use of an external device) regularly or there are unpredictable consequences to her health. I realize this is maybe not super clear from the text, which sometimes conveniently forgets about Seven's limitations re: regeneration (see this post) and turns her prosthetics into a sort of superpower; I'm not saying it's an accurate depiction of disability by any means, but it's not something that can be completely ignored when discussing Seven either. In all honesty I've downplayed this aspect of Seven's character in the past and I really regret it because after it was pointed out to me, it's indeed pretty obvious. The trauma of Borg assimilation was disabling, and it's embodied in Seven even more than it is in other xBs, since it happened to her so young. She can never 'get rid' of it and she doesn't exactly want to, either*, even with all her very understandable ambivalence about it ("I am human, but I am also Borg").

(*I think Picard S2 makes this argument more complicated but recent live-action shows have been truly fucking awful at dealing with disability and metaphors thereof so I won't try to make sense of it. What matters is that Seven ultimately couldn't be 'magically cured' there either.)

ETA: I forgot to add, Seven is absolutely an adult. To me there's no question about it; she's played by an adult and none of her storylines, none of her struggles about figuring out how to be an individual in a group, about how to live with the terrible guilt and responsibility about her actions as Borg drone make sense if she isn't an adult. The whole character of Seven of Nine falls apart if she isn't an adult who is struggling with the terrible consequences of trauma.

Second, infantilization is a very real manifestation of ableism. This article defines infantilization as "a nondisabled person having more power than a disabled person and using that power against them to invalidate their thoughts, opinions or experiences. This can show up in numerous ways, such as indirectly speaking to a disabled person or assuming that the individual can't advocate or speak for themselves." In short, treating a disabled person like a child who needs to be directed at all times and who is assumed to not fully understand the ramifications of any independent decisions. It's not a matter of just language, either: the same article points out that 1.3 million disabled adults in the US were under conservatorship in 2018, and that forced sterilization of disabled adults is still legal in at least 31 US states plus Washington D.C. So let me make this super clear: disabled adults having their autonomy revoked, especially their bodily autonomy, is absolutely an issue in our current world. And it all stems from this ableist conceptualization of disabled adults as being like children, incapable of making the right decisions by themselves and for themselves, especially about their own bodies.

Now it's maybe clearer how this relates to Seven's whole deal, both in the show and in fandom. On the show, so many things about her prosthetics and about her looks were decided by the Doctor without consulting her at all, and how ironic it is that the one taking the decisions is a hologram coded with the biases of so many medical professionals, and it's one of those cases when no one, no one challenges the EMH! Sure, the Doctor pretty much saved her by making the reclamation process very smooth, but of course the idea that he can 'shape her' and ultimately 'cure her' of her disabilities (subtextual neurodivergence included) keeps popping up in the show pretty frequently, and she almost never gets a word in edgewise. Seven and the Doctor end up striking up a friendship, and things get a little less eyebrow-raising, but still it's pretty horrifying how the sexism of the production translates into ableism diegetically, though to be fair to Voyager it's definitely not the only Trek show where this happens. It's just that being about Seven, it's a very sustained theme on Voyager, and one I really wish wasn't there.

Off the show, in fandom, I think it would behoove us to at least try to do better than Voyager. Ultimately Seven of Nine is a fictional character that has no real feelings to hurt etc, but again what message does it send to real people when (part of) the fandom insists that Seven is 'mentally a child' or 'doesn't know what's best for her' and can't take her own decisions about her own future, even her own name? Again I'm not saying this to be a scold, and I can recognize that I haven't always been fair in my approach of Seven's disability. There's a lot of work I still need to do, and language is just a very tiny start. But it is a start nonetheless; I'd like it if people could see it as well.

[metalheadsforblacklivesmatter]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but...

Stop with the abelism in reference to Kanye West

Stop saying he needs a conservatorship. Stop calling him "insane". Stop acting like this Nazi stuff is mental health.

Mental illness doesn't make someone a fucking Nazi. Mental illness doesn't make someone a white supremacist.

You know what does make someone a Nazi and a White Supremacist? Fascism.

Fascism does that.

(Also conservatorships are often used to abuse mentally ill adults, infantilize them, and forcev them to stay with their abusers. Or did we all forget about Britney? )

It's real fucking funny how Trump spreads a bunch of fascist rhetoric, and it's "Wow, he's an asshole". But THE MOMENT it's a Black man saying the same thing, it's "mental illness". Pretty sure that's racism.

(I'm not saying Kanye West isn't mentally ill. I'm not his therapist. I'm just saying that we need to stop explaining away his obvious fascist rhetoric as "Lol, mental illness".)

I'm mentally ill, and it's never caused me to me a white supremacist or Nazi. You know what mental illness does to me? Makes me think everyone hates me, I'm unlovable, and give me really bad rejection sensitive dysphoria.

(I'm not saying all mental illnesses are the same, I'm just saying that mental illness doesn't make you a fucking fascist.)

-fae

[monsterfucker-lisa-swallows]

this is going to be a very uncomfortable and potentially triggering conversation so i suggest you scroll past if you have a lot of empathy because this isn't fun at all

also wanna preface this by saying i'm not interested in spreading conspiracy theories or "truther" claims because i feel that's incredibly disrespectful and potentially harmful to the people that need the most help. any allusions to unverified rumors will be presented as uncorroborated, not as fact (only bringing them up because i know that's the kind of rumor floating around and i don't want to seem like i'm participating somehow in dismissing concerns). because we simply don't know. and it's not our business.

i've had this bad feeling about amanda bynes for the past decade. it's the same pattern we've seen with child stars over and over again. the drugs, the mental breakdown, the conservatorship. but i pushed those nagging thoughts away. i didn't have the bandwidth at the time because i was living in an abusive household when her most public battles were happening. i didn't have the time or the emotional understanding to put towards what was happening to her even as i felt it mirrored what i was going through or what my mom was going through. then i found out about dan schneider a few years ago. i didn't really engage with the rumor and speculation about him - i was in my early 20s when this all broke and i didn't know most of the shows he'd been involved with except by the fact that my younger siblings watched them. i'd been an amanda bynes fan - hugely into the amanda show and what i like about you. my siblings watched drake and josh, icarly, and victorious. i didn't have the emotional bandwidth at the time to look into what people were saying. i knew it would upset me if i learned too much. but i couldn't stop thinking about amanda.

i heard about quiet on set from news websites. i saw the headlines about drake bell. it shook me to my core. the things i was reading were horrific and immediately put me in mind of what my sister went through as a teenage survivor of repeated sexual abuse by a man who was trusted with our care. she'd had a huge crush on drake when we were growing up. i wonder if she's heard about this.

this immediately made me think about amanda again. this time i couldn't push the thought away. i guess i'm finally ready to process the way this whole situation has felt to me.

the way people talk about amanda reminds me of how people in the 50s talked about judy garland. child star with incredible talent, far beyond her years, with incredible charm and personality and the whole world at her fingertips. everyone loved working with her. until she became erratic and had a mental breakdown fueled by drugs. (you could even argue there were parallels because both women were frequently typecast as the wholesome girl next door and not really allowed to break out of that infantilizing box.) and no one could ever think why. why does this happen.

i've come to believe that mental illness always has a cause. brain chemistry fucked up by trauma, whether that's long-term stress or a singular event or repeated traumas stacking on top of each other. the mind can't cope. i really, truly believe something horrific happened to amanda bynes. and i know people will say, well, maybe it wasn't dan schneider. she was doing fine for years after she stopped working with him. i want to make one thing very clear. trauma doesn't always manifest symptoms immediately. not everyone comes out of a trauma looking shell shocked. i know from my experience because i didn't have my breakdown until a year after my abuser was exposed and i'm still feeling the consequences to my psyche to this day. and i think it must be difficult for child stars to process this trauma. the pattern i've seen is the child star endures something terrible, gets incredible fame and begins taking on more and more pressure, then when this isn't enough to make them happy they turn to drugs. you think because they got out that it would all just go away? no. they were raised to play characters so they played those characters. there was incredible pressure to just play those characters because that's what the fans want. having struggles isn't part of the brand. it had to be especially rough on nick stars because there wasn't much separation between them and the characters they played. it was the amanda show. drake and josh used their real first names. the separation between who they were and who the character was was probably a very blurred line.

i wonder how long this documentary has been in production. tracking down these people and petitioning courts had to have taken ages. amanda was supposed to be at 90s con last year but cancelled due to illness and had another psychotic episode. 90s con itself may have been a trigger for her, but if someone had reached out to her or if she'd heard about this production...i could see that triggering her and making her relive the horror she went through. there are so many unsubstantiated rumors floating around. i can't speak to whether she was high on adderall during that interview when she was 12 (she could've just been a hyper child but they could've been pulling a judy garland on her and i don't trust these people plus she's said she got hooked on adderall when she was a teenager for weight loss but she may not feel comfortable disclosing if the studio has her under NDA). i can't verify if that side twitter actually belonged to amanda. it could be some sicko thought it was funny to accuse her boss of knocking her up and forcing her to get an abortion at 13 or accusing her father of various things.

but i get why she wouldn't speak up because people won't believe her no matter what she says. i went through something and people in my hometown still debate whether i'm crazy or lying for attention. my family did everything they could to put me under control and get me diagnosed as paranoid or delusional so they wouldn't face justice. (really don't get me started on how the mental healthcare system is used by abusers to cover up their sins.) i wouldn't put it past her parents to do that, especially considering amanda had a bad relationship with them as a teenager which sent her further into that groomer's clutches. she doesn't owe us anything because it'll start a firestorm that could retrigger her as people debate if she's delusional or scrutinize her past mistakes to determine if she's a perfect enough victim to deserve sympathy.

which brings me to drake bell. i knew he was the victim before i watched the doc but it still gave me chills when he sat down in that chair. like it felt like the air drained from the room. it was so obvious that what he went through has affected him so deeply and that he had no one to turn to. my abuser had so much community support, so many people making us out to be lying opportunistic bitches. i can't imagine having to carry that secret. i wonder if the people around him can pinpoint it in retrospect when he started being different. i want the other kids on set to know that it's not their fault they didn't know and that they had a bad opinion of him at some point. my sister and i were pitted against each other by the man who assaulted her and it's only with context later that i can see what was going on. i have no doubt that schneider employed these tactics so no one would feel comfortable disclosing what happened to them.

i admit that i cried watching the drake bell episode. that had to be incredibly difficult for him to open up about it after all these years and i hope he can get some closure and that someone starts a support group for these former nick stars.

and to drake bell himself. you were a child. you had no idea what grooming looks like. most grown people don't seem to know what grooming looks like based on how they talk about these issues. you are not at fault for what that man did to you or not knowing how to handle it. you didn't do anything to encourage this and you're not at fault.

and to his father. i appreciate that you did what you could to try to protect him. my mother had a similar experience trying to protect us from my abuser but everyone assumed she was psychotic and had her put away. try not to blame yourself when you were the lone voice of reason and everyone else insisted you were in the wrong. i do have fault to throw on amanda bynes' parents to some degree depending on what part of all this is true, but i can't find fault with drake bell's father who did try when he saw something wrong.

and i'm sorry but dan being super nice to drake afterwards seems like an attempt to make himself look better and get another hit show. i don't believe for a second that dan didn't know anything or that he had any motives beyond making his own star rise. he wanted to churn out product, and couldn't have that product if drake bell was visibly distraught.

i want to know how many people have known it was drake for 20 years and said nothing. how many people were in peck's side of the courtroom and yet still had the audacity to think this child was at fault in some way. that's vile and utterly unforgivable.

i just want to end this by saying to leave these people alone. don't harass anyone who hasn't spoken up because they may not be in a headspace where it's healthy of them to say anything. they don't owe us any explanation of why.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

complain about autistic tiktok hour again

(okay to rb just note i get very angry in this)

love seeing a tiktok by late diagnosed person saying “don’t compare late dx & early dx experiences” and “don’t come on my video talking about late dx experiences & tell me it would be so much harder for early dx people”

which like without context, yeah! late dx ppl early dx people have different experiences with their dx! and don’t derail other people venting about their own experience with your own! without context this critique sounds very warranted!

BUT. adding back in context which the late dx person make their video in…. you realize how much conversation shift.

the late dx person literally say “it would have been better if we had known earlier”—if they diagnosed earlier. and go on to say how much better it would be. so now you see how the “hey early dx people have it fucking hard too” is genuinely fucking reasonable, a much needed reminder.

“if you are early dx, it means that your autism was affecting other people to the point they need support dealing with you, and you may or may not have your support needs actually met, but us late dx people had to internalize our autism and not have support blah blah” AKA a subtle way of saying “but i have it worse” directly after saying “don’t compare experiences.”

it’s so fucking clear that some late dx, high masking (& lower support needs & level 1 autistic) have no fucking idea what autism spectrum actually means, because they think all early dx people are is someone who look exactly like them, who experience their autism the exact same way as them, who disabled by their autism the exact same way as them (maybe even with more privilege for example white & male)—but essentially exactly the same but only difference is just happens to be early diagnosed.

sure, some early dx people may be like that. but i guarantee you many many early dx people are not. fucking. like. that.

the reason why i say some late dx ppl think early dx ppl are exact same as them just diagnosed different times is because the rhetoric of you only early dx because your autism “affect other people to the point they need support dealing with you…” fucking consider. some people are early diagnosed because they fucking have speech delay, because they don’t talk until much later, or because they are still fucking nonspeaking as a teenager as adult maybe probably whole life. because they aren’t potty trained pass typical age. because they so disregulated they have daily violent meltdowns they harm self harm others. because they elope run into traffic. sure, these actions affect others, but consider: they affect the autistic person too. intensely. severely. have you considered that some autistic people need more support for themselves?? in “dealing” with themselves????? have you ever fucking experienced not being able to communicate any fucking want desire (yes, maybe even nonverbally!) and no one understand you (even if they try their best! which many don’t!!), how fucking frustrated they may be? because THAT is the reality of many life long nonspeakers who didn’t get access to communication through AAC later in life adolescence or adulthood.

have you ever fucking considered that people have different experiences because people are fucking marginalized to different degree and some people may be more marginalized than you??

you snarkily add the “may or may not” to “early dx people may or may not get their support needs met because severely affect other people blah blah” but we all know your tone and context means you actually mean to imply early dx people get more support while ALL late dx people don’t get any support. which is so fucking blatantly ignorant and false. who gets disproportionately dumped to neglectful abusive ableist group homes because their family either can’t or don’t want to deal with them, abusive conservatorship that strips you from all basic autonomy, who gets disproportionately restrained, sent to seclusion, institutionalized, heavily drugged, murdered by their family, given bleach to “cure autism,” etc? have you fucking looked at the autism industry the ABA industry in early 2000s 1990s or earlier, when many early dx people who are now adolescents or adults are born?

some late dx say “don’t compare struggles! don’t trauma olympics!” to any early dx person or higher support person yet imply or directly state “but i have it worse than you uwu” it’s fucking hypocritical. like please get off your ass and reflect on your own trauma and privilege.

(emphasizing on the some on some late dx people)

saying this as a not-early-diagnosed person (due to birth country etc unrelated reasons)

i’m so fucking angry i hate you

[spaceumbredoggos]

Rant time!

Crimes my ABA therapist team/father did on me:

Locked me in my room due to my violent autistic meltdowns (The lock was turned around on every door of every room I lived in.) This caused me, out of my own anger, to smear shit in the carpet, break my window, kick a hole in the wall, and scribble all over my walls. Yeah… But what else were they supposed to do with my violent meltdowns? Tumblr, can you tell me? I clearly showed signs of PDA autism or even ODD.

After I had scribbled on the wall, they had made me clean the wall (natural consequence) but to make sure that I would do it, they took away my tv. I eventually just adapted to life with no TV so my dad just painted over the scribbles and patched up the walls with me. Good thing my dad worked in real estate and knew how to patch drywall.

On the subject of no tv, if u did anything remotely violent, I would have my tv (and to an eventual extent, my electronics) taken away for a week. When I stopped having violent meltdowns, it was changed so that any hint of grumpiness had one prompt to get corrected otherwise, no electronics for two days. I would have fucking panic attacks over losing my electronics for two days because that was my special interest livelihood.

They held my special interests over my head with strict screen time (tv was an exception) regulations where I had to earn the time. Taught me how to do personal hygiene but at what cost? I still struggle with excessive screen time use to this day. I also wasn’t allowed social media, but I snuck that. It just taught me to sneak my electronics and not get caught, and the times I did get caught, they would take them away for two days. They also had so many parental controls on my phone to the point where I didn’t have google or access to games on my phone, and arguments would start over whether to have google or internet access on my phone. The only reason how I knew my environment was toxic was because I snuck internet access and looked up signs of abuse.

Autistic shut downs were considered “noncompliance” and were punished severely. It started with taking my electronics away for a week, then two days, then everything would be taken out of my room. I was having really bad mental health issues that caused autistic shut downs in high school due to PE (story for another time.) Dad pulled me from school when there were dozens of other solutions (even the people at the school suspected something going on at home.) I couldn’t keep any of the friends I made from high school and then the pandemic hit. My shut downs got worse, so my dad took my mattress out of my room, sometimes right from underneath me. Of course, I didn’t stop shutting down, so my dad finally resorted to dragging me outside for me to lay on the ground, then berating me by saying things like I was gonna “end up like a fucking homeless person” and shit like that. This escalated to him throwing my then nine year old sister outside simply for stomping her feet. Long story short, my therapists backed him up.

One time, I was having severe suicidal ideation the day before my eighteenth birthday because of the abuse. I also wanted to report my dad’s abuse (nothing was done when I reported it a few months later, although I did get out of that environment, but who’s to say he’s not abusing my ten and six year old sisters and my step mom? I mean, he’s shown that he is willing to abuse them before (more on that later) so what’s stopping him from doing it? Oh well. Pointless worrying) but nothing was done. My dad was a transphobic bigot and he only would let me transition if I were, with the therapists’ advice, sign over my entire rights as a person through power of attorney. Yeah, first off, power of attorney doesn’t really do that. That’s a conservatorship, which is what Britney Spears had. Also, of course I had my electronics and phone taken away because they didn’t want to “cloud my thoughts” aka access vital information for escaping abusive relationships.

The icing on the cake for all of this is that they left me home alone for two weeks (read my one shot Breaking Point, which is a little more exaggerated version of what happened. I might make another draft that’s more in line. I added some things for shock value, but yes, Penny the dog did chew her beds and the couch. Yes, my dad had blamed me because even though I walked and took care of that dog, I still was sneaking electronic time (no one was there to really enforce that rule) on character ai, which pissed him off. I did try to k*ll myself with a knife, and some meds and alcohol. Wound up hospitalized for a week, then in a crisis home for two weeks. It was there where I was finally able to escape the abuse by reporting it to adult protective services. Even after I left and moved out to my gran’s house, my dad still withheld my Nintendo switch and laptop, and only gave them back after an angry call from APS.)

That’s also not to mention broken financial promises. My dad had promised me $50 usd for every A I got. Got straight A’s since halfway through my junior year and I was on a quarterly system, so I had accumulated well over $1000. Plus, I got $560 dollars in cash graduation money presents from my family that I had put in my wallet. My dad never gave me back my wallet after I moved out, even though I had lost it. So that’s why I am flat broke.

Finally, after I had left the psych ward after a week in it (in May of ‘23) my dad refused to let me have any access to birthday presents or any sort of contact with my mother’s side of the family (my gran, who is my savior, and my aunt and uncle, who have helped me out immensely.) He wouldn’t even let me text them and had parental controls on my new phone (which I never got back after I moved out.) Yeah, he was very controlling. I am now shunned by my entire dad’s side of the family sans some of my step mom’s family.

[fingertattoos]

apparently radical opinion but i do not care if GRB “feels bad” about her part in her mothers murder. i’m so exhausted by all these conspiracy theories about how long she actually knew she could walk or her shoplifting or her online “personas” she would dress up as for nick, none of that detracts from the fact that her mother medically tortured her for years and intended to do it for the rest of her life and was attempting to get a conservatorship over her as she was “turning 18” despite the fact that GRB was in her 20s and had no idea how old she actually was. all of that still happened no matter what GRB did behind her mothers back in the background. it’s not enough that victims suffer through abuse, but everyone always wants them to suffer after or else none of it was real.

frankly i could not give a fuck less if she gets caught on camera dancing on her mothers grave. if she had been a victim of kidnapping and medically tortured nobody would be questioning her choices.

[tigercallalily]

so i’ve been listening to the audiobook of britney spears’ memoir the woman in me and rather than rant at one person with massively long texts or at my parents i just gotta throw everything out incoherently, even tho i’m not quite finished yet

so like, first things first, the writing is not stellar. honestly about what you would expect and it fits if it is a bit slow in the beginning. i saw a review that it reads like a high school girl’s diary which i’d say is pretty accurate for the beginning but less noticeable the farther along

next, we hate justin timberlake and kevin federline. when i was talking to my parents about the book and her relationships, they both said that they already didn’t like jt bc of someone else he cheated on i think and then federline bc he’s a scumbag. they both suck and also the blatant double standard for men and women specifically in hollywood/fame but also just every where. which she points out several times

next, its sexist as fuck and also a problem, but in child custody, if both parents want custody, it’s usually ruled more favorably for the mother. but federline smeared britney’s reputation so fucking well that they gave him more custody of their two sons under the age of 5. like tabloids did such a number on her entire reputation and seems like absolutely no critical thinking was entertained by anyone that hey maybe some of this other shit we’re doing is causing these problems and she can’t get away from any of it

so i was 10 when she walked into that hair salon. i knew approximately zero things except that i was being told that she was going to rehab for drug abuse i think. and i don’t know what was known then but she talks about being swarmed by paparazzi and taking care of two babies by herself and her husband being closed off from her and like??? then she gets her reputation smeared in their custody battle and it’s all very public and i’m sitting here like “yeah, no shit she snapped. that’s a fucking lot to deal with”

finally, holy shit there had to have been some sort of bias, if not corruption, in the courts for her custody and her conservatorship. or potentially the courts were overrun (which is likely) and britney’s case is the one that got the least effort. i don’t know if it’s what i’ve been told or the actual general public opinion, but there was always the dumb blonde, ditz, butt of the joke directed at britney. it always came across as she was stupid. she made some stupid mistakes, which she admitted, but she wasn’t stupid. specifically about the conservatorship, she was lied to by plenty of people and didn’t know who to trust that would tell her the truth or if they would lie for her parents because they were paid by them. sidenote but law is confusing and pretty much everyone is stupid about one part or another which is why laypeople shouldn’t represent themselves. anyway, she knew the conservatorship was fucked up from the beginning but when she said she went along with it because it let her see her sons, it was a lightbulb for me.

again, the writing isn’t stellar but then we get bangers like “At what point did I promise to stay 17 for the rest of my life?” and “My freedom in exchange for naps with my children — it was a trade I was willing to make” britney you can’t make me emo about these things while i’m driving. looking back on my vague memories, it feels insane that the tabloids picked her to completely ruin. bc it doesn’t seem like there was anyone else who ever got focused on quite so harshly.

[owlet]

i truly do not want to hear SHIT about britney acting “bizarre” on instagram. like no fucking shit she doesn’t act “normal.” no part of her entire life has ever been “normal.” and the first reactions i see after she does anything even mildly eyebrow raising is “OMG she’s insane!!! she needs to still be under conservatorship!!!!” when the behavior in question is literally just… posting thirst traps? stop being so obsessed with this abused woman’s personal life or there is something WRONG with you

[stephaniedola]

Top 5 films?

[rubs hands together]

ok im not gonna count my like all time fav memey comfort movies (see: the lorax, popstar: never stop never stopping) im gonna try and go with like real films. also my taste changes all the time so this is not a hard and fast list

Love & Mercy - biopic about Brian Wilson from the beach boys, portrayed in a really unique way bouncing between his 20ish year-old self at the height of his career and developing drug-induced psychosis, and his 50+ self meeting the woman who would someday be his wife while still in the clutches of an abusive conservatorship. i've never seen a movie depict either a famous persons life OR a cluster B disorder so well and with such love, mercy, and respect. if you long for better biopics, just watch love and mercy. i wasnt even a beach boys fan and i still watched it. the movie converted me and now pet sounds is like my fav album. oh and paul dano plays young brian

Fight Club - yeah yeah i know this seems like a weird choice but im just obsessed with the lore of fight club, both the book and the film. i think it was really well done and if you actually read it the way its meant to be read its just such a good time. fuck capitalism, fuck consumerism, DID is a bitch. also my main man Eddy Nortz is there so need i say more

A Clockwork Orange - this is another one of those "the book is better but the film still killed it" kind of situations. i just really like the themes and cinematography. sometimes you just want to sit down and watch some good old fashioned ultraviolence with a side of fascist overthrow and government brainwashing. ive yet to find another novel/film to truly dig into what "bad" and "good" really mean and whether forced reform is possible if the persons mind never truly changes. also i stan malcolm macdowell

RRR - right now im really just vibing with it. it ticked all the boxes i love in an action movie and in a drama. not the mention the absolute banger of a soundtrack. the friendship/romance between rambheem is so iconic and i can tell its gonna be one of those films i return to time and time again. if anyone has a link to the telugu dub pls lmk i cry that i can only find it in hindi (the songs r so much better in telugu)

The Princess Bride - arguably just my #1 never-changing favorite movie, but honestly its so ubiquitous it feels weird to give it that title. how can the princess bride be my favorite movie when its just a part of who i am? i know almost every line verbatim. i've seen it more times than i can even count. its a classic. i adore it. but, at the end of the day its not the kind of movie that can move me because it barely even feels like a movie at all. its more like just, a way of life