#Embodiment of Balance Phantom

[sil-and-seals-blog-something]

OOOOOOOOOOO

This tags and everything you’ve put down are lovely!

Also, YES YES YES! I like your thought process. I think Danny could be like, the Ancient of Heroes and Space while being the embodiment of Balance (as his ghost half was immediately born within a portal, which we don’t see for the only two other Halfas. Vlad had a slow process and Ellie had no process. Danny could literally be straight up claimed by the Infinite Realms and Living World equally). We also know that there’s a relic that can mind control ghosts/ecto-entities, so we can build off of that and say Vlad got a relic similar but not exactly like it. Like, if Danny goes against an order, then it acts similar to a shock collar (except instead of a shock, it does either something like draining his powers or something worse than a shock) type of thing maybe, and a relic affecting someone’s power would probs mess up a summoning? Add on some blackmail and Vlad’s able to prevent Danny from fighting back in a human way as well!

Also, yeah, the JLD are freaking out most likely over The Balance not being able to be summoned, that’s like, bad bad news, especially because it didn’t feel like a rejection of the summons, it was a full on “this number can’t be reached at this time, try again later” (like improbably-luminescent said earlier), which has much worse connotations than a simple summoning rejection.

(MAGIC SHANK!)

Also, everyone will feel a shiver of dread upon learning that 1- Danny made a way-too-powerful magic sword and 2- gave it to Damian “Stabby Robin” Wayne Al Ghul of all people

Practice Your Skills

“You ever look at someone and wonder how hard it would be to get past their defenses and stab them.

Damian snapped his head to the side, looking at the young boy now standing beside him.

The boy put his hands up in front of him with a wince, “Not that I ever do that. Totally not, whaaaat???”

Damian huffed and turned back around to watch the gala participants.

“It’s just you kinda looked like you were contemplating the logistics of stabbing Mrs.Halterguild for squeezing your cheeks.”

Damian scowled. Then, after a moment’s beat, “It would not be very difficult. She is nearly blind in her left eye, I would be able to approach without repost.”

The kid hummed, turning back as well before motioning to another group to the far right, “What about Mr. Beckensmith, he’s a retired vet right?”

Damian rolled his eyes and scowled harder, “The man has only seen the battlefield of an office as he bribed his way from being fully enlisted and instead managed to pay for increasingly higher ranks and medals. He is a disgrace.”

The kid cocked his head to the side, looking suspicious for a second and then nodding with concession, “Fair enough, I bet I could get close enough too.”

Damian scoffed.

“What, don’t believe me?”

Damian leveled a doubtful glare at the civilian, making it clear by looking him up and down, “Hardly.”

The other smirked dangerously, “If I can get close enough to poke him and get away without being noticed, will you believe me?”

Damian narrowed his eyes but nodded succinctly and watched as the boy immediately took off, making a few loops around other people before finally backing up to Mr. Beckensmith and poking him on the opposite side as a group moved past.

Damian pursed his lips. Interesting. Certainly better than he would expect from an amateur. And an amateur civilian at that.

When the boy returns to his side Damian brushes off the asks of meaningless praise.

“Come on, I did it, now you have to go poke Mrs. Halterguild without getting caught.”

Damian sneers, “And why would I do that?”

“Because I don’t believe you either, the woman’s old but I bet she sees you and squeezes your cheeks again. Old ladies just have a sixth sense for that stuff you know.”

Damian nearly growls but sets off on his task. He makes sure to stay on her left side, but the woman turns at the last second, forcing Damian to use a passing waiter as cover to remain hidden and finally get close enough to poke her gaudy dress.

Then he sidles back up to the boy on the edges and provides his best ‘I am more capable than you’ scowl. The boy simply laughs and says, “Who’s next?”

They spend the night like that, choosing each other’s targets to attack non-lethally as though they were attempting to stab them, and Damian finds the gala going by in a significantly less tedious manner.

Right up until the boy laughs at him when he chooses a target. Only one bark of laughter escapes, but it is enough for Damian to consider stabbing him as well. If only with a butter knife.

Instead, Damian grinds his teeth and asks, “What is so different about Masters, do you really believe you would be unable to succeed?”

The other gives a breathless chuckle, “I’m pretty sure even you wouldn’t be able to successfully stab Vlad Masters,” The boy’s shoulders sag even as his jaw tightens with irritation, “He sees everything.”

Damian narrows his eyes. Something naws at the back of his brain but currently the critique of his capabilities takes precedence.

“I would be capable of stabbing Masters even without my favored sword,” Damian scowls and stands taller with annoyance.

“Sure you can, man,” At this, the boy quirks a sharp smile, “If you can actually get him, I’ll personally get you a magic sword,” he says with an air of amused indulgence. Like he thinks Damian is some insipid child saying he will find a fairy.

Damian grits his teeth and shakes the other’s hand, then immediately sets off after his target. How dare this civilian question him! He is the Son of the Bat, this is not even a challenge!

Damian growls as his approach is thwarted for the third time by the man turning in his direction and almost spotting him. How dare he! He will not fail!

Just as he reaches to jab the man in the side, already poised to make his escape, Masters whips around and clamps his fingers around Damian’s wrist with a vice grip.

“Really Daniel I thought we were over-“ Masters pauses, looking at Damian critically as he glares at the man’s offending hand, “You are not young Daniel.”

“Remove your hand from my person at once,” Damian growls.

Instead of listening to Damian’s very sensible directions, Masters tightens his grip and twists his arm, most likely in an attempt to hurt him.

“Now why is a child attempting to-“

Damian doesn’t wait to hear the rest of the man’s words, sliding a dagger into his other hand and swinging towards him, until that hand is caught mid-movement as well.

“Heh-Hey there!”

Damian snaps his head to the side just in time to see Grayson take his dagger and slide it into his pocket. He ignores the bark of laughter he hears from across the room.

Masters’ hand disappears from his arm suspiciously fast, “Mr. Wayne, what a pleasure!”

Damian looks over his other shoulder to see his father standing behind him, a thin smile on his face, “Vladimir!”

His father’s figure quickly obscures his vision, putting an arm over Masters’ shoulders in a way that clearly makes him irritated but forces him to follow as he is steered away.

“Dami, I thought we talked about the stabbing at formal events,” Grayson says through a strained smile as he looks over the crowd to make sure no else saw.

“Tt, it was merely a demonstration of my skills, he was in no real danger until he refused to release me. I simply sought to correct that mistake.”

Grayson pinchesthe bridge of his nose, “Demonstration for who, Dames? We all already know your skills.”

“Tt,” Damian scowls and turns away.

Instead of pushing it, Grayson simply sighs heavily, “Just stay out of trouble for the rest of the gala okay? We’re almost done.”

Damian scoffed and waited for Grayson to leave. Once he does, Damian finally looks over to where he had been lingering with the boy.

Gone.

Clearly he’d taken the cowards way out when he’d seen that Damian had been accosted by Masters.

Pitiful.

Damian spends the rest of the night scowling from the wall and looking serendipitously for a head of black hair and blue eyes unrelated to him.

Of course it’s not until they are actively leaving that Damian sees him and immediately splits off of from his family.

He approaches with irritation, preparing to grab the other by the shoulder when suddenly he turns around and blue eyes meet Damian’s green.

“You,” Damian sneers.

“Me,” The other shrugs. He has an amused smile on his face, though it was strained at the edges.

They stare in silence for a minute, before the other’s smile grows and sharpens once more, “I didn’t expect you to actually try to stab him, y’know,” A slight laugh escapes him, “Not that it was unwelcome by any means, but still, unexpected.”

Damian scowls again, glaring at this foolish civilian.

“Oh, I never introduced myself did I?!”

The boy exclaims and holds out a hand, smile dangerous, “Daniel Fenton. Or if we’re being technical,” a pause as Damian finally returns the gesture and finds his hand trapped, “Daniel Masters, a pleasure to meet you Damian.”

“Hurry up little badger,” A voice says beside them, and Damian notices that it is indeed Vladimir Masters.

The man approaches, placing a heavy hand on Fenton’s shoulder, making the boy go taut, and then they both step into a dark car, leaving Damian on the front steps.

Damian’s anger flares and he shoots a glare directly to the boy getting into the car. It dies the moment they meet eyes and Damian sees the fear hiding in the other’s eyes.

Fear that Damian is all too familiar with.

Fear that reminded Damian of himself. Reminded him of his own eyes when he’d been under his grandfather.

But why did Fenton look like that?

[surelysilly]

the eleventh age of magic

Not too many folks like Balance, y'know?

my piece for @dpxdc-worldscollide! i did a desktop background, and it and the zine are free to download so go check it out to see all the awesome work everyone did <3

smth smth a post-AGIT au, clockwork's apprentice Danny finds himself embroiled in yet more problems over something called the Cosmic Logs and all because he wanted to embody something as simple as Balance smdh

[yoongle--boongle--pie]

Pechsträhne - Chapter 1

A/N: I can't even describe how excited and proud of myself I am to finally get this out on paper. My brain has been riddled with this story ever since I had a dream that inspired it. I can't wait to share this with y'all! I'm going to be figuring out how to make a masterlist tonight that I will keep updated with the main story, along with any extra goodies like playlists or Pinterest boards if anyone would be interested in any of that stuff. Please enjoy. Lots of love ~ Delyn <3

P.S: I moved accounts! So all further updates will be posted to @yoongleboonglepie! Much love

word count: ~13k

Chapter playlist-Youtube music

Chapter Playlist-Spotify

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You have been invited to celebrate with us! 

The Wörner Hotel and Estate is celebrating 150 years of providing excellent service to all of our guests, and we want you to be a part of it! Built in 1875 by German settlers Matthäus and Felizitas Wörner, it is a nature lover’s dream; nestled between the edge of Michaux State Forest and historic Gettysburg Pennsylvania. This luxury hotel is the perfect balance between historical and luxury. We have everything you may need from live entertainment, multi-room suites, a freshly updated swimming pool, 24-hour room service, daily activities or fitness classes, valet parking, onsite grocery, and more. And with over one hundred acres of gorgeous grounds to explore, you’ll never get bored! Well, what are you waiting for? There’s no greeting warmer than at The Wörner Hotel and Estate!

Y/n’s fingers fiddled with the gold embossed invitation absent-mindedly, her eyes finding it difficult to keep their attention on anything else other than the piece of paper that felt so heavy in her lap. She had fought herself incessantly about what to do with it since it had wedged itself haphazardly into her mail slot, a physical embodiment of what a thorn in her side it was. Its arrival shouldn't have caused as much emotional turmoil as it did. She should have expected it, she had told herself repeatedly in order to calm her nerves, which worked about as well as a sinner praying their way through a last-ditch effort to make it to heaven. And despite what this invitation may say, Wörner Hotel and Estate seemed like anything but heaven to her right now - Hell would be a more fitting name. Seeing the sketched out image of the hotel printed on the bottom shot her back into her childhood memories of sitting short and wide-eyed as she watched different guests all busy up the stairs to enjoy their vacation, or where the tours would disappear onto the different walking trails. Only turning her attention away when she realized they had not noticed her presence, to whatever toys she set up on the front veranda that day- usually animal figurines whose feet and faces had been gnawed off by the family dog, or severely mistreated Barbies.

She floated through all of her memories of growing up in the hotel with great resistance: Stampeding through the gardens with the staff children after cold elementary school days; Guests that just never seemed to leave; Her parents lavish parties in the ballroom; Phantom touches in the lobby; Swimming in the lake up at the state park on warm summer nights with her sisters and younger brother and pigging out on smores late into the evening.

Her younger sister’s death.

Ghostly figures in long hallways, reaching their hands out to grab her. Always watching.

Her friends. Her fight with her parents.

Everything she didn’t want to remember had been stamped with a wax seal and thrown back into her orbit against her will. She hasn’t spoken to her parents in four years as of this past Christmas, and her younger brother Roland has become increasingly difficult to keep on the phone for longer than 10 minutes before he loses interest in their conversations. Her elder sister Amelia, only three years older than y/n herself, has been radio silent since the night Y/N left the hotel and didn’t return. Their relationship was barely kept afloat by obligatory texts on holidays and birthdays. 

All this makes Y/n wonder why they ever thought she would go back and why they even sent this invitation to her? Who still even worked there?  And what in god's name took over her mind to have her bag packed with a rushed explanation to her two very confused roommates, and seated on the first Amtrak train from D.C back to Pennsylvania? Maybe it was the residual emptiness of missing her family from the past holiday season, or maybe it was a nagging feeling in her stomach that told her she needed to. 

The train slowed down as it reached some small station outside the border of Pennsylvania state lines that Y/N can’t be bothered to hear the name of. She glanced out the window to watch a few stragglers shuffle on and off of the train car in front of her thoughtlessly, their impatient and rushed steps of no real interest to her.

With it being mid morning on a weekday, she had just missed rush hour and consequently the train wasn’t as busy. This gave her space and time to think about what to text to her driver-whoever that is-which she hasn’t done yet and probably should. She only had less than an hour before she arrived at the Philadelphia station, and the drive from the hotel was almost triple that. With a gentle jolt, the train begins to pick up momentum again, its grinding metal and loud engine squealing at her to hurry up.

Biting her lip, she pulls out her phone and looks at the messy pen scribble of her mother’s handwriting on the bottom of her invitation: a phone number she doesn’t recognize and a short “Call if you need a ride :)” message next to it. The friendliness of the smiley face seemingly contradictory of the basic impersonal invitation she was sure they sent to anyone and everyone.

 Maybe they didn’t expect her to come and they just felt obligated to send it? Turning the thought over in her head, she shook it away with a shudder. It was too late to have these doubts now-the hum of the train beneath her seat and the “Welcome to Pennsylvania!” sign making that abundantly clear. Punching the number into her phone, she hit the call button before she could give herself time to second-guess it. It rings once. Twice. A third time. Only stopping when the receiver tells her the number can’t be reached and to try again later. 

“Fuck.” Y/N curses under her breath, remembering that she is, in fact, in a metal tube speeding through tunnels and trees that really push the boundaries of her average cell phone line. She types the number in again and waits this time until the train pulls into another small stop right at the southernmost part of Pennsylvania. She had not maybe 30 minutes (if she was lucky) before her train ride would come to its dreaded end. Thumbing the call button, she waited. This time it rang only twice before an overly enthusiastic voice answered on the other line. 

“A warm greeting from The Wörner Hotel and Estate! Front desk and lobby services, this is Seokjin speaking. How may I assist you today?” His voice was smooth and light on the ears, but it hit her as anything but light. The name made her entire form tense up, and a nervous sweat prick at her brow. The reality of what she was doing truly settling into her system as the voice of an old friend forced her to face the consequences of her actions head-on. It's fine, She told herself, he probably doesn't even care. It's been years...

“Hello? May I help you?” He quipped again, a bit less perky than the first time.

Realizing that she hadn’t responded she choked out “Yes! Yes, one moment please!” She mentally face-palmed herself for such a clumsy response. “This is Y/N. Y/N Wörner. Anslem and Mariah’s daughter.” 

A moment of fuzzy silence met her ears causing her to shift anxiously in her seat. She was in the process of checking the phone screen to see if he had hung up when shuffling noises on the other end of the line jolted her phone back to her ear and his silver-tone voice cut through the static. 

“Oh! Yes forgive me-Mrs. Wörner had mentioned you might reach out.” He let out a smooth chuckle before continuing on.  “I assume you are calling for transportation services?” If he was surprised, his tone didn’t show it.

Y/N nodded, before catching that he could not see her with a “Yes, please!”

“Great! What’s the pick up address?” Y/N could hear the smile in his words and she flushed with embarrassment at how not put together she sounded. What a wonderful "first" impression she's giving him of her adult self.

“It’s going to be the Philadelphia Amtrak station.” Her eyes flitted to the trees dotted with new buds outside her window, finding their gentle sway in the wind soothing enough to qualm her racing heart. 

“Awesome... And what time will your train be arriving at the station, Ms. Wörner?” She heard the click of a pen, and the scratch of its ink on the paper. 

“Well, you see about that…” She trailed off as the train began to leave the small station, the pen scratching mimicking her pause. “Maybe 20 minutes or so?” She laughed nervously at her own obvious lack of foresight. If he had managed to scrounge up any good impression of her during their call, she had just metaphorically tossed it out of her train window.

Seokjin guffawed on the other end of the line and openly sputtered out a “20 minutes?! That's an almost 3 hour drive, miss. I will send someone out right away, but will you be alright waiting?” Y/n could tell he was trying his best to cover up his anxious outburst with concern, and the formality in his phrase feeling foreign and uncomfortable to her ears.

“I’ll be fine. I’ll grab something to eat and hunker down on a bench. It’s my fault for not calling sooner…” Y/N’s voice trickled out as she realized how this might make them look to her parents-making a guest wait for longer than they would approve of. She made a mental note to herself that she would just happen to forget to mention it during any conversations with them.

“Alright then Ms. Wörner. Your driver will reach out to you via text to share their information, location services, and a description of their vehicle. " She heard the unmistakable clicking of frantic computer keys as the previous anxiety in his tone faded and his customer service voice took over once again. "Please have your phone on hand with notifications on in case they need to reach you with any questions. Is there anything else I can help you with today?

“No, that is everything. Thank you, Jin.”  The nickname spilled from her lips with a practiced ease that surprised her own self, but he carried on like he didn’t seem to notice. 

“Wonderful! I will see you later in the evening.” She could hear him typing something into his computer before the clacking ceased and a moment of silence enveloped them again. This time the silence felt eerily wrong and awkward. She could almost hear the sharp exhale before his voice drifted through the phone at a volume so quiet she almost missed it.

"I'm sorry- I couldn't catch that." She laughed trying to lighten the sudden shift in atmosphere.

“It’s…” He paused, seemingly weighing the sound of his own words on his tongue. “It’s good to have you back, Y/n.” 

The dial tone signaled that the line had ended, but she still found herself holding the speaker to her ear much longer than she needed to. The way he said her name with so much heaviness had her whole world spinning. It was both nerve-wracking and comforting that he remembered her. It meant she hadn’t been gone long enough for anyone to truly forget as easily as she had wished they could-for she should know better than to expect from them what she could never do within herself-and she couldn’t decide if that was a blessing or a curse.

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Hi there, Y/N!  I am about 15 minutes out from the station. I will park out front in the pick up line- black Hyundai, license plate no. JHP-0613. See you soon!! :) - Hoseok J.

Y/n used a greasy finger to swipe the notification bar down to read the message. So Hoseok ended up staying to work at the hotel too? She tapped the straw of her empty soda cup to her lips in thought. She would’ve bet money that he would’ve at least been working in the live entertainment part of the hotel; destined to follow in his parents’ footsteps more so than one of their chauffeur drivers.

His father, Jeonghun Jung or Mr. Jung, had been an exceptional live swing and jazz singer in the evenings in the main restaurant on the property, the Adelaide, with his mother Misuk Jung performing duets with him on rare occasions. Hoseok had been his mother’s favorite dance partner during her weekly swing dancing classes, and he had done wonderful stage work even at a young age. He should’ve had a straight shot to take their place once they retired, and they couldn’t possibly still be performing these days at the rate they had with their age, Y/n mused. Unless things really had changed drastically while she had been away. It made her wonder if everyone had stayed at the hotel except for her.

She scoffed at the thought. Last she heard the Min’s boy applied to a college up in New York, and Jins cousin always was a smart kid-he must’ve left first chance he could. They had been more of her sister's crowd even though their age gap wasn't that drastic-having grown in distance from Y/n herself once high school made that small age gap seem wider than it was.

Shaking her thoughts away, she wiped the grease of her fast food meal on her pants and typed a simple “Great! See you then.”

She swung her bags onto her shoulders with a grunt, and leisurely strolled through the station, only pausing to toss her soda cup away in a nearby trash can. Y/n pushed through the exit and found a spot for herself near the pick-up line that wasn't too uncomfortably close to other passengers awaiting their rides.

Taking in her surroundings, she eyed the bridge leading up to the station and watched all the pedestrians walking their own beat into the cement. The thing about Pennsylvania is that anywhere in the ungodly large state feels familiar. Maybe it’s the constant stark contrast of natural beauty and old cement monstrosities, or perhaps it’s the feeling that every place in this humid state is haunted with its own age and existence. Being surrounded by the bustling nature of Philly’s atmosphere reminded her of taking trips here with her family, having walked the same sidewalk following the bridge to and from the train station many times. 

A rhythmic vibration grew in volume and stole her attention away from her surroundings as a sleek black car pulled into the spot closest to her. The hip-hop song cut off as the driver's side door opened and a head of long wavy brown hair framing a wide heart shaped grin popped out from within. 

“Y/n! Wow!” He let out a short whistle as he leaped onto the sidewalk with ease, and traipsed over to wrap her in a tight hug before she could protest. “It’s been waayyy too long.”

Her arms loosely wrapped themselves around his small waist, and all she could smell was orange blossom and pine-The latter being one of the signature smells surrounding the estate and the former being purely just how she remembered Hoseok. For a few moments the smell took her back to sitting shoulder to shoulder with him and his mother, a large mug of mulled orange tea,  and their backs bent over a card game with crisp autumn air permeating the room from an open window. At that time it had been nearly impossible to keep him off his feet after he had suffered an injury from playing too roughly with the other boys. He had been practically melting from boredom, and had lost a lot of his usual shine from being sheltered in on himself. A shine that radiated off of him like a thousand suns at the present day. 

“Ugh, not long enough." She lamented, and he released her from the hug with a dramatic roll of his eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah. Save that attitude for your folks, not me.” His eyes trailed from her and the backpack and overstuffed carry on bag digging into her shoulders, before his warm brown eyes found hers again with a click of his tongue. “Is that all you brought? I figured for such a long stay there would at least be a suitcase-hell even a second backpack.” 

Y/n tilted her head at him, confused. “ Such a long stay?” 

Hoseok raised a brow at her response and chuckled. “I mean, yeah. I assume you’re staying for the entire anniversary celebration schedule-are you not?” He gestured to the straps on her shoulder, and she immediately shrugged them off and into his waiting hands. The relief her shoulder blades felt was unmatched at the moment. 

She hesitated in her response, choosing instead to watch him pop the trunk and place her bags in. She hadn’t actually thought about how long she’d be here, she realized. Weirdly enough, her mind felt too fuzzy to bother worrying about another thing today-so she waited for his eyes to glance up at her over the open trunk to give him a shrug. 

“I didn’t think that far ahead, if I’m being honest.” 

He let out a boisterous laugh and slammed the trunk shut. “Seriously, you must not have changed that much.” Continuing to chuckle, he rounded the side of the car to the passenger side, and swung the door open in a dramatic gesture and a flash of his blinding smile. “After you, Ms. Wörner.” 

With a smile and a shake of her head, she settled into the front seat. He closed the door once certain she was fully in the car, and skipped to the driver side door and swung himself in and slammed the door in one swift move. 

“Are you always this casual with all your passengers?” Y/n turned to face him with a teasing smile. 

He snorted. “God, no-I like having my job.” He flicked the turn signal on for only a half second before swerving into the passing lane, immediately keeping pace with the other philly drivers. The hip hop song resumed at a lower volume than before, filling the car with a laid back atmosphere. “I have all my passengers sit in the back whenever possible. They can be really…” He paused trying to find the right word while switching lanes to take a westward exit. “Annoying.” he concluded. 

“And I’m not 'annoying' to you?” Y/n laughed, thinking about the amount of times he had referred to her as such as a child. 

“You?” He let his eyes flicker to her briefly, sliding a sly smile on his face before returning his gaze to the road. “Never.” 

The drive went by quickly with such an engaging driver by her side. He was sure to ask all about her time in D.C., and she readily supplied him with answers. She told him all about her starting school, then in turn dropping out after her first year after feeling like no major fit her goals (if she even knew what those were anymore). A fact she was usually much too embarrassed to share, but he took it with no judgement. Instead taking the conversation elsewhere, like her current hobbies and interests, or prodding into her dislike for her roommates with exaggerated humor. She didn’t realize how much she had missed talking with him. Why didn’t she reach out to him? To any of them? She wondered.

As if her brain liked being cruel her to when she was finally able to slip into states of peace, it forcefully pulled one of her last prominent memories of him.

Her face was hot and wet as she stomped out of the private dining room. The gentle sway of Nat King Cole that used to be her favorite around this time of year had become her least favorite thing in the world at the moment, each note hitting her ears sharply. Her head pounding in retaliation to what was once a subtle volume now seeming like it bounced tauntingly in her skull, telling her to have a ‘Merry Christmas”. If she wasn’t so angry she would’ve laughed at the irony. She didn’t get far down the festively lit hall before she ran face first into Hoseok, his hands still damp from having just been washed bracing her shoulders, and his concerned voice muffled by her own blood rushing through her ears. She met his worried and imploring eyes, his wavy hair only just gracing his brows back then, and all she saw reflecting back in his eyes was her own swollen and disheveled reflection. Then his face fell into the same shape everyone else in the dining room had. Pity.

She hated it. It made her skin crawl, and her stomach bubble in self-defensive rage. He was looking at her the same way Mr. and Mrs. Min just had. Like the Jeon and Kim families had. Like Hoseok’s parents had. It made her sick. 

“Did you know too?” She spat out. 

He stuttered at her sudden intensity. “W-what? What are you-” 

She pushed her finger into his chest sharply. “Don’t you lie to me, Hoseok Jung.” 

A moment of stillness gripped them both in a heavy hand that's fingers were closing in on them, one at a time in a tight fist, trying to take its time suffocating them. His eyes flickered back and forth between both of hers and then she saw it-his chin crinkled just so-and it gave him away to her in an instant. 

She let out a wet angry laugh that sounded closer to a sob. “So you too, huh?” She took a staggered step back, feeling like with every step the floor was pulling her deeper. Like it was trying to pull her through the floorboards so it could swallow her whole. At this moment she wanted it to. “Did everyone know?”

“Y/n, listen I-” His eyes were glassy, saying more to her than his words could.

“Save it.” She shoved past his outstretched hands and began the pathetic walk of shame back to her room. She hated crying in front of people, and it seems like everyone in the house had gotten a front row seat and an encore. She heard him call out for her, but it didn’t stop her. She didn’t have the strength to face any more betrayal than she already had.

“Y/n? You still with me?” Hoseok took one hand off the wheel to playfully wave it in front of her face.

She pushed his hand and her memories away in fake annoyance with a gentle ‘sorry’. 

He shook it off with a laugh.

“So what about you? Your parent-are they still performing at the Adelaide?” Y/n snuck a sideways glance to judge his response. 

He let out a heavy sigh. “Ah…no not really. My dad will sometimes sing some of his old classics on busy weekends, and my mom switched from swing classes to waltzing lessons. But otherwise they’re mostly retired from the entertainment industry and doting on my sister. Old age and achy bones and all that.” 

Y/n nodded along, trying not to ask the burning question of why he hadn’t taken their spot. Before the question could sear it’s way off her tongue he spoke again, seeming to read her thoughts. 

“You remember the Kims 2.0? Not Seokjin and Namjoon kinda Kims. The new Kims." He gave her befuddled expression a brief sideways glance and continued to clarify. "Thinking about it, I guess you probably didn’t get to spend as much time with them before you were sent off to all those different schools. And they were usually gone around the holidays as his parents don’t care too much for Christmas. They were only around for a couple months before they hired their son permanently.”

Y/n’s face scrunched in thought as she tried to remember their arrival. “The Kims 2.0?” 

Hoseok hummed. “Yeah. They were hired after y-” He seemed to catch himself “After I broke my leg-sometime around there. They do stage planning and such. They travel a lot and work remotely from California most of the time though.” 

When Y/n didn’t give him much of a reaction he clicked his tongue and moved on. 

“Well, their son, Taehyung-he’s got this singing voice that’s undeniably born for big band and jazz-they would’ve been a fool not to give him the job the second he turned 21.  It didn’t take much convincing for him to take my dad’s place.” There was tension in his tone that he seemed to be trying to cover with his usual nonchalance. But she could pick up on his discomfort-the a passage of time doing nothing to rust what had once been second nature-and decided to change the topic. 

“Huh. I guess the name sounds familiar…but tell me,” she turned her body to face him and folded her hands in her lap. “Who else stayed behind?” 

“Once a gossip, always a gossip.” He rolled his eyes, but another small genuine smile was breaking across his face. 

When he didn’t start talking immediately, she gave him an expectant look. 

“Alright, I’ll spoil the surprise, geez.” He turned the car onto an exit, signaling their time on major highways ending and the time of battlefield side roads and wooded winding paths etched into the scenery. Satisfied with that, she turned her head to look out her window- she could see the main town of Gettysburg in the distance, outlined by the setting sun. 

“Seokjin works the desk and maintains the lobby, as you are aware. Usually I work as a valet or chauffeur. But sometimes I pick up random jobs around the place when I’m not busy: like working the pool or picking up shifts at the convenience store and gift shop. Pretty much anywhere they need me.” He turned off the main road that would’ve sent them straight through downtown Gettysburg, and veered onto the start of the long scenic back roads that led to the Hotel and Estate. “Sometimes even giving Yoongi a hand with electrical issues when he needs-”

“Yoongi? I thought he went to a university in New York?” Y/n couldn’t contain her disbelief.

“Oh, yeah. He did, but came back about 3 years in. Said something about needing to figure some things out before he went back to finish.” 

“Oh.” 

“Yeah. Anyways, our Jiminie is one of our tour guides and the historian” Hoseok cooed, “You should pop into one of his tours of the property in the morning! I don’t know if anyone has gotten around to telling him about you coming back yet.” 

The way he said coming back with such finality settled heavily in her stomach-like he had expected her to come back-like he was expecting her to stay. She rolled her eyes at her own thoughts; that was definitely just her anxiety speaking. 

“Jungkook works housekeeping right now-but he’s been weighing going into security training. I’m sure he's just ecstatic to hear about you. “ Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows aggressively and gave her a teasing smile. 

“Oh shut up with that, he was always just my good friend.” Y/n flushed lightly, knowing full well Jungkook had not seen her as just a friend throughout their childhood. Always trailing after her like a puppy because for some reason her awkwardness, lack of social skills, and very strict way of organizing her animal figurines must have really drawn him in. He hadn’t ever actually said anything to her about it, choosing instead to be a good friend who was a great shoulder to lean on. But even with obliviousness being a top skill on her metaphorical resume, she had been able to tell. 

“Uh huh. You tell yourself that, Mrs. Jeon~” 

“Oh my god! We were FIVE. Playing house was serious business back then and you know it-we even got divorced twice. TWICE! Does the word divorce not mean anything to you?” Y/n couldn’t contain her laughter by the end of her defense, and neither could he. 

“What was the first one about again?” 

Y/n waved her hand dismissively “Oh-he wouldn’t let me name our pretend pet dolphin Shoeshine or something like that. Said the dolphin needed a more distinguished name.” 

“Damn, that really does sound like very serious business.” He cackled. 

“Don’t act like you’re innocent here!” She spun her entire body in her seat to face him “I also married YOU once. AND Yoongi.” 

He gave a loud overdramatic gasp. “So you admit to cheating on me? All these years I wondered…what a shame.” 

They dissolved into a fit of giggles before a comfortable silence settled in the vehicle. Glancing back over at him to quip another remark about their fake marriage, she paused. He seemed to want to say something else with the way his mouth tightened before opening momentarily-then snapping it shut with pursed lips. He must’ve decided to just say it, his voice breaking the silence.

“Your sister is still off in Europe, so we haven’t seen her since the last time you were both back for the holidays.” He flexed his fingers against the wheel to ease the budding tension from his body. She could tell he was avoiding bringing up what happened during that holiday visit that caused her sister to run to foreign college programs- and she couldn’t blame him.  Their reluctance to speak of the topic made it easy for him to quickly move on. 

“Roland goes to school nearby for now, but I don’t see him often enough to give you much more than that.” He offered with an apologetic shrug. “And last but not least-Namjoon has taken up landscaping maintenance and gardening. He does a great job with it too-It is what he went to school for after all.” Hoseok chuckled, trying to keep the mood light again.

“So he did make it to school?” Y/n quipped in. 

“Yeah, he did some hybrid program that had him in and out of California to study Botany and Horticulture, with a minor in some sort of plant management….something. You can ask him about the specifics.” 

“Huh.” Y/n fell back in her seat, her shoulders sagging against the seat.

“What?” He glanced over at her as he made a right turn onto the gradual hill that snaked it’s way to the front lawn gates.

“It’s just…” She saw the gates of the driveway in the distance and her heart tightened painfully in her chest. “Everyone stayed. I was so sure most of you would’ve banked the second they got the chance.” Everyone but me. 

His grip tightened on the wheel. 

“We tried, but it’s almost like this place-” He paused with a sharp exhale. “-you just feel like you never want to leave.” 

His words were genuine, but his smile was not. It was the first smile she’d seen from him today that didn’t meet his eyes

Pulling into the gate she felt her heart somehow squeeze tighter, and she tried to shake away the unsettling feeling that found a home in her chest at his words. Instead turning her attention to the old metal gates that were always propped open to welcome its endless flow of guests. The long front lawn decorated in hardy shrubs dotted  inbetween with budding nursery plants, the soil around them was still loose and fresh, probably new additions to welcome the coming of spring. Her eyes surveyed the clash of the familiar and unfamiliar. The plants looked different than the usual flora species she remembered them traditionally planting, it looked like someone was experimenting with a new layout-probably Namjoon- she concluded.  Hoseok took the gravel road at a relaxed place, giving her time to take it all in. The outside of the hotel remained the same- A combination of colonial and old European romance. Boxy, yet elegant, and still unimaginably huge. Her eyes flitted from the front stairs and followed to the right around to the side veranda built onto the sloping  hill, so you can gaze down into a heavy tree line and over the-

“What the fuck is that?” Y/n pointed at a rounded protrusion from the right side of the building towards a dome of glass panels where the outdoor pool used to rest. 

“What? The pool?”  He slowed the car to a stop so she could get a better look at it. “They built a greenhouse dome around the outside portion of it to extend its year round use. It’s really nice inside. Next shift I work at the pool, I'll come grab you and you can keep me company while I keep an eye out for drowning children.”  After she had a few moments to take in the new addition, he put the car into motion, snaking his way through the roundabout and stopping at the base of the stone steps. 

“Here we are!” He sang unbuckling both of their seatbelts. He hopped out of his seat the instant he put the car in park, and shut the door behind him without sparing her a glance. She heard the trunk open, and the shake of the car that made her sway in her seat as he pulled her stuff out of the trunk. In any other circumstance, she’d think he was trying to be annoying, a classic move on his part of avoiding her gaze and leaving her in the dust to see who could make it to the front doors first. But this time she could tell he was giving her space to take it in, and for that she was grateful.

She took a deep breath and gripped the door handle with three fingers. She watched through the window as Hoseok started carrying her bags up the stairs at aleisurelye pace, taking his own time in order to give her more. She felt the handle give under her hands, and the rush of chilly early spring air brushed against her skin, and the symphony of bugs and the sound of the tree branches dancing in the breeze met her ears.

The hair on her limbs stood up in succession, sending chills across her entire form. One of her feet met the ground, and the crunch of gravel felt so loud in her ears. It rattled her bones and made every muscle coil up, like an animal preparing to run from danger. She stood, putting both feet on the ground, an intense feeling getting stronger the closer she got to the stairs. Her heart thrummed in time with each one of her steps, and her ears began to ring. Hoseok had already made it to the doors, and was conversing with a luggage boy. Why did he feel so far away all of the sudden? The air suddenly felt as though it was closing in on her with each pace and the ringing in her ears was so loud, she thought they might bleed.

The bottom of her shoes met the first stone step with a thud, and suddenly all was quiet. She froze, unable to move any further. No more bugs, no sway of the tree branches in the wind. The ringing in her ears had ceased. Only the sound of her breathing and her heartbeat remained, which felt so small in comparison to this open ended silence. She couldn’t even hear Hoseok’s distant voice talking to the men standing at the doors; it was like they weren’t even there anymore. Glancing up, she found that they were in fact no longer there.

The space they had occupied showed no sign of life. The doors were still open, yet no light emitted from the windows or the threshold. She was alone. The door was still open, but was now occupied by a pulsing darkness that felt both overwhelmingly alive yet utterly empty.  The silence became suffocating.

The dark blue of the spring night sky no longer felt peaceful-it felt dangerous. It was as though she had a thousand eyes on her from all directions, waiting with baited breath for her to fall right into their hungry, gaping mouths. From her right side, a cloud of cold air curled around her leg and weaved itself between her palm and fingers, coiling itself tighter around them like it was holding onto her and keeping her from turning back. The gravel road gave way with a crunch behind her, and then she heard it. A whisper so quiet it almost blended into the chill breeze. 

“Welcome home.”

Suddenly the world snapped back into motion, nearly knocking her off her feet with its force. The bugs resumed their song, and the trees their swaying dance. Her chest was rising rapidly as her eyes searched frantically at the warmly lit windows, and the once dark and empty door now bursting with a warm inviting glow. In front of it her eyes landed on where Hoseok stood, giving directions to the luggage boy as he handed them her bags. Suddenly wanting nothing more than to be near him and the inviting light of the lobby, she sped up the stairs as fast as her legs could take her. 

“-private estate. You can put them on the second-floor landing. Thank you.” 

By the time she reached him, her heart was beating out of her chest and she had begun to sweat-from nerves or the speed at which she pushed herself up the stairs she couldn’t tell.

He turned his head to speak to her and did a double take. 

“Woah- what happened to you? You look like you might be sick.” His hand gently brushed his hand across her forehead to check her temperature, and his other hand held her forearm to steady her. She was sure it must’ve come back damp but he didn’t comment on it, instead choosing to remain quiet with his mouth twisted in contemplation. His eyes flickered over her shoulder down to the car, and paused there for a moment before meeting hers. Abruptly, he turned and stepped through the front doors of the lobby. 

The high white stone and gold ceiling outlined in ornate crown molding, brightly lit with a large chandelier hanging proud over the lobby seating was as grand as she remembered. Hoseok didn’t give her time to marvel over it, his shoes clacking loudly on the polished floor as he beelined for the check in desk located against the back wall, passing all of the seating and the barreled ceiling hallway to her left that led to the theater hall below them. The large wooden board behind the man behind the counter’s wide frame was dotted with golden keys hanging from their large metal rings- “it keeps the charm!” her father had insisted when they talked about changing to key cards. She watches the man behind the desk reach one and swipe the one hanging under the number 203, handing it to the family he was checking in. Her eyes’s mesmerized by the way the rest of the keys glittered in the yellow glow of the extravagant light fixtures mounted next to it. 

Her father let her sit in during their meeting with staff and other executives during the discussion about what updates they’d like to see in the next 10 years. She had taken the opportunity very seriously- her favorite Clifford the Big Red Dog pencil with a frog shaped eraser gripped purposefully in her small hands, scribbling down notes she deemed worthy in a batman themed notebook. The moment Mr. Jeon had suggested a keycard system, and the room was divided between moving with modern technology, or keeping the surviving key system they’d had since the first guest stayed in the hotel. She remembered the way her father, after sitting with his brows creased deep in thought, turned his gaze to her and grinned. “What does the future inheritor of the Wörner estate say?” 

“I can help the next person.” Seokjin’s clear tone brought her into the present, jolting her heart that had just barely managed to calm itself from whatever happened outside. 

His warm brown almond shaped eyes and friendly smile made her heart feel warm with nostalgia-giving her a much needed distraction. He gave her a once over and his face immediately fell into a look of irritation as he turned to Hoseok, who sauntered up to the edge of the desk. 

“Checking in a Ms. Wörn-”

“What did you do to her? I sent you because I thought you’d be a good fit to make her feel comfortable, not to torture her!” He reached his hand up and gently smacked Hoseok upside the head. 

“Hey!” 

“Hey what? I knew I should’ve sent Namjoon instead.” He turned to his left, muttering something along the lines of sending a clown to do the lord's work as he rummaged through what looked like a mini fridge tucked under the desk. 

“Ugh Jin, pull it together.” He reached over the counter to poke Seokjin’s puffed out cheeks, and the latter immediately brought his hands up to swat him away. “And anyways, I’d give Namjoon five seconds into Philly before he would’ve gotten into an accident. He doesn’t know how to drive in cities.” 

Seokjin stood back up, nudging the mini fridge door closed with his hip, a can of water in his hands and scowl on his face directed at Hoseok’s cheeky grin. Turning his attention back to y/n his face did a complete 180, lighting up in a friendly smile again. He held the aluminum can out for her to grab, and she reached for it with grateful shaky hands, cracking the top open to take a large swig of the cool liquid. 

“Sorry about him Ms. Wörner, you know how he can get.” 

“Please, call me Y/n-don't be a complete stranger.”  and “I didn’t do anything to her!” were spoken over one another.

“Oh yeah? What happened then? Did some other fool talk her ear off for 3 hours?” 

Y/n couldn’t stop herself from nearly choking on her water as she fought back a laugh at the two. The combination of their familiar banter and the refreshing water pulling her back into a more relaxed state. 

“No.” Hoseok plucked a piece of invisible lint from Seokjin’s red jacket. “She tripped.”  Seokjin slapped his hands away again, before eyeing him suspiciously. 

“She tripped?” He straightened his coat off instinctually after he pried Hoseok’s fingers from fiddling with it.

“Yes. She tripped.” 

They seemed to engage in some sort of silent conversation, their eyes following each other as they flickered back and forth to her and the front door behind her. Seokjin relented with a sigh, and turned to Y/n his smile on his lips yet again.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear about that. Be sure to watch your step in the future, we don’t need anything happening to you during your first time back.” He turned to his computer screen for a moment, before moving around to exit the lobby desk.  “Let me show you to your room.”

“I can handle that-” Hoseoks smug smile was wiped off his face by a stern glare from Seokjin. He raised his hands up and surrendered the lead to Seokjin.

 He led the three of them up one of the dual staircases that led to the second half of the lobby ecasing both sides of the front desk, each step feeling more familiar than the last. Once at the top, she saw the convenience store and gift shop to her right, and next to that their small cafe-The Edelweis-with its white floral logo lit up but the seats mostly empty. To her left was a barrelled ceiling hall identical to the one on the level below them, only this one had restrooms lining the left side wall, and a wide red carpeted hallway that led to the right and straight to the Adelaide. She could faintly hear the smooth floating trumpet of a Kitty Kallen song serenading its patrons, and the aroma of the extravagant and diverse menu making her stomach grumble in interest. She’d be sure to stop in tonight if she had time, her mouth practically watering at the thought of freshly made pasta, birria-inspired pot roast, and rustic French bread with their signature gochujang, honey, and herb butter. A melting pot of a restaurant that stands as a physical embodiment of all the different people whose hands helped maintain the hotel to what it is today. 

Seokjin had his hands clasped comfortably behind him as he walking, keeping his back straight. Y/n took this time to inspect his new look: His dark hair not too short but not too long, kept neat and out of his eyes under his cap. His shoulders had widened, and his jaw grew into that which made his face look older and more mature- the last of his boyishness gone in everything except the jovial glow in his eyes. The three of them traversed in silence. Well-what was silence until Hoseok got fidgety. 

“I can’t wait for you to see the estate’s new look. They updated the color so it’s no longer the old dingey red that's in the main hotel. It practically looks like a new building.” 

Seokjin gave a weary look between the two of them, but didn’t comment. He just continued to lead them down one of the side halls on either side of the main elevator, and out into the open square courtyard that the two arms of the back of the hotel wrapped around. Y/n nearly tripped over her own feet to keep pace with how fast he seemed to walk across the cobblestone. Weaving expertly around the small flower garden and seating area where a few guests were lounging about, enjoying the gentle babble of the water fountain. He nodded politely to them and tipped his hat, which they returned.  With swift steps they made it out of the courtyard and up the gravel path to the Estate house. Stopping at the navy blue and gold embellished doors, he pulled out a key from his pocket and slid it in the keyhole. If Y/n didn’t know any better, he seemed to be on edge- stuck in a conundrum of being in a rush yet somehow also reluctant to open the door. But as for why she couldn’t quite piece together. 

The doors swung open and her breath caught in her throat. She had found her answer.

What used to be the old dated, red wallpaper, was now a soft sky blue- brightening up the white molding and making the golden details shine. The wooden floors had been repolished, and a dark blue antique patterned rug ran through the main hall and disappeared into the rest of the downstairs. Everything was fresh, bright, rich, and confronting. Just like she had drawn out when she was a teenager. 

The thought made her both swell with pride, and awakened a dormant rage. Forcing those feelings away she followed their steps, past the large dining room to her left and the study to her right. With each doorway she passed, she could see snippets of the new designs-her designs-sticking to the blue tones and gold embellishments. A nod to the Wörner heritage, and to the tea set brought to the United States by Namjoon’s and Seokjin’s fourth great grandfather that had a permanent home in their dining room display cabinet. Its grayish blue accented cups and saucers are a symbol of the symbiotic relationship between the two families that had been going strong for nearly a century.

Making their way up the grand staircase to the landing, she saw her bags resting on one of two navy plush armchairs. The elegant blue from below continued up throughout the landing and down both halls on either side of her, perfectly complementing the oil-painted mural of wispy clouds and classically painted figures draped across the landing’s ceiling. 

“So, what do you think? Nice right?” Hoseok did a small whistle and a turn. “Makes it feel so much brighter and less like The Haunted Mansion with all of those deep moody reds.”

Seokjin stood quietly, his head slightly down and his neck flushed. He probably knew that this had been her idea. Her design. With his parents being so involved in the affairs of the hotel and estate, they would know everything, and subsequently so would he. Hoseok remained oblivious to the awkward energy in the room, so Y/n plastered a smile on her face in order to save everyone from the lingering discomfort. 

“It really does. Just makes it more inviting.” She managed to get the words out without sounding too forced, a feat she had to pat herself on the back for. Tearing her eyes away from the walls to look at the two of them, she could practically feel Seokjin’s shoulder’s relax as he bounced to pick up her bags with two hands. 

“Your room has remained mostly untouched at your parent’s request. I’m sure you can change that though if you wanted to.”  Seokjin smiled. Y/n realized as she watched him stand still, that he was probably waiting for her to lead the way to her room. Muscle memory led her there-down the hall on the right-hand side of the split landing to follow the bend to the left all the way to the back corner room.

She could hear their soft footsteps behind her, so she knew she didn’t have time to freeze up now. Gripping the bronze worn doorknob with vigor, she pushed open the door with a bit more force than she had meant to, causing the door to bounce off the door stopper before coming to a slow stop at an angle.

“Geez, what’d that door do to you?” Hoseok remarked, earning a stiff elbow in the ribs from Seokjin.

Ignoring the two of them, she stepped into her old room. It was exactly as she remembered it. The golden bed frame wound with battery operated lights from her highschool years, her comforter a natural forest green, complemented by an array of burnt orange and white leaf patterned pillows. The walls a sage green botanical wallpaper, peppered with photos from her childhood and highschool. Kicking a flipped corner of her patterned woven rug out, she took a slow lap around the room, stopping to run her hands over the calendar, 4 years out of date, still open to December. On the 25th box were a few doodles of trees and cookies she had done in a tipsy haze the night of Christmas eve. Seokjin cleared his throat, startling her. 

“Where would you like me to set these?” 

“Oh! You can just toss those on the bed. Thanks.” she gestured absent mildly in the direction of the bed. 

He did as he was told, while Hoseok just leaned against the doorframe, glancing around the room seemingly lost in thought. 

“Dinner in the estate is still served at 7:30, so you have a bit of time to get settled if you’d like to join us. You don’t have to eat here, you can always go to the Adelaide or wherever you’d like. But I’m sure your parents are looking forward to seeing you tonight.” Seokjin bowed gently, and began to retreat. Without thinking, Y/n walked over and put a hand on his arm. 

“Thanks, Jin. I really appreciate everything today. I missed you all.” Y/n met his eyes, hoping to convey her sincerity. 

“No problem Ms. Wör-”

Y/n cut him off with a playful groan. “ Enough of that- you’re still my friend, no need for fancy titles or anything like that.” 

His ears twinged pink as he gave her a shy nod and smile. The customer service persona was gone, and  in front of her stood the sweet and quiet Seokjin she remembered as a kid. 

“Great! I’ll see you at dinner then. 7:30?” 

He fixed his coat again, and the confident persona took over once again. 

“Of course you’ll see me there. You know me, always on time.” He gave her a small salute and passed Hoseok (who had been silently watching the exchange) giving him a curt nod as he left the room. Hoseok watched him go until he was out of sight, and turned back to face Y/n. 

“You doing okay with all of this?” He asked, gesturing to her with his chin.

“Yeah I am. I should probably wash the bedding though, don’t you think? Four years of sitting in a dusty room probably has them feeling pretty stale.” Y/n laughed dismissively. She unzipped her bag and began to pull stuff out onto the stiff comforter. 

“I didn’t just mean your room, but that’s good to hear. I can let the laundry service know for you on the way out.” She met his gaze again for a good long minute-waiting for him to crack a joke of some kind- but he didn’t. 

“Oh.” She paused, trying to wrack her brain for a good response. How was she doing with all this? Honestly she couldn’t tell, her day had been a complete whirlwind so far. It was like something had drawn the curtains on her anxiety and emotions so she couldn’t feel them at the moment. If she really thought about it, she couldn’t put her finger on why she had been so nervous in the first place. Right now, she felt good in the estate-like she was supposed to be here. “I’m really not sure. I feel fine, I think…” She trailed off with a shrug. 

He hummed in agreement, but he didn’t seem to buy it. 

“Well if you need anything, I’m down the hall on the left side of the landing now.”

“Awww. We aren’t neighbors anymore?” 

His smile came back again, and he laughed. “Oh don’t you wish.” He pushed himself up from the door frame and stretched his arms above his head until she heard something pop. “But fortunately for you, I’m Jungkook’s problem now.” 

“Shucks, what am I ever going to do with all this peace and quiet.” Y/n snapped her fingers in feigned disappointment. 

“Oh I don’t know about that, your new neighbor is a night owl so I’ve heard.” He began to saunter back out of the room with a teasing smile. 

“Oh yeah? And who is that?” She stuck her head out of her doorway to peer at him as he made his way down the hall. 

“Yoongi. He insisted on moving to this hall when he came back so I traded with him.” 

_________________________________________

Hoseok was true to his word, the cleaning service showing up not 10 minutes after he had made his leave. Once she had thanked them profusely and handed them her linens, she made sure to waste all the time she could by puttering about her room and giving it a gentle face lift, doing anything to keep her mind occupied and away from both her parents and whatever the fuck she had experienced out front. Removing the outdated calendar was first, then putting away all her belongings in color order (multiple times), before tucking her bags beneath the bed-which is where she was in the process of doing now- seated on the floor with her bags folded over her knees, and head tilted in confusion. She had lifted the bed skirt up to shove the bags under there to be forgotten indefinitely, when something being in her way stopped her in her tracks.

There, centered under her bed, was a small wooden box that was sure she hadn’t left in that spot. It was her old childhood jewelry box, one of which she purposefully avoided taking with her. With trembling hands, she pulled it out and unlatched the lid.

Laying inside the velvet lined side right where she had left them, were all of the pictures she owned that had anything to do with her younger sister. She picked up the first one and held it up to look at it more closely, even though she knew that she shouldn’t.

Three girls, close in age and wearing a set of matching dresses only differing in color, were lined up on the front porch of the hotel, the front lawn behind them was flourishing with flora and littered with toys. The photographer-she thinks it had been Mrs. Jung- had to have been standing in the open doors of the lobby when it was taken. Posing obediently on the right-hand side was Amelia, the eldest, wearing a large toothy grin and one arm tossed awkwardly over Y/n’s bent form. The 4-year-old Y/n in the photo had her arms wound tightly around the youngest in the photo, Matilda. Matilda’s small hands were clasped around a stuffed horse, and she was sporting the signature awkward and messy grin of a nearly 3-year-old toddler.

Y/n felt her throat tighten as she held up the next photo: the one of Matilda’s last Christmas. No one in the photo had known that at the time of course-so the photo did not reflect the mood it now elicited from most onlookers.

It was teeming with the unbridled joy of over a dozen children posed in front of that year’s lavishly decorated tree, all of them buzzing with impatience to open the overflowing pile of presents spilling into the bottom edge of the photo. She could recognize the faces of a few of both her own distant cousins that had joined in the festivities that year speckled in between her sisters, and the boys who lived in the house, and Hoseok's sister. She spied Hoseok's wild boyish grin standing next to herself, his eyes looking sideways instead of at the camera. Jimin was posed sweetly, sitting sandwiched in the front on the floor between young Jungkook and a boy she didn’t really recognize. One of Jin and Namjoon’s cousin’s who had come to visit for the holidays on occasion? Or perhaps Taehyung, the boy Hoseok mentioned earlier... She wasn’t entirely sure.

Her eyes slid to the Kim boys standing politely off to the right with Amelia. She only just caught Yoongi’s head poking up over Namjoon's shoulder, a small forced smile on his face the most he was able to do for a photo he had adamently detested being in.

Y/n traced Matilda’s small face with the tip of her finger, her arms spread out above her head as she mimicked the star on top of the tree. Clearing her throat of the ball that had formed there, she shoved both photos back in the box, her eyes just catching the photo of a newborn Matilda draped across her own small lap before she shut the lid and slid the clasp back in place.

She only had a few minutes before she had to make an appearance at dinner, and she wasn’t about to go in looking like a blubbering mess.

Shaking her shoulders out and pinching her cheeks, she shoved her folded bags beneath her bed and rose to her feet with the box in hand. Walking over to the large closet, she opened the door and popped the box on the top shelf, promptly shutting the door on both it and the feelings it had dug up. Closing her eyes, she took a few deep breaths before walking into the small ensuite bathroom to freshen her hair and splash cool water on her face. Looking at her own reflection, she tried to give herself a pep talk. 

“It’s just dinner. You can do this. If all else fails, just eat in silence and leave early-but you have to go.” She moved to leave the room but paused, giving heself a stern pointed finger through the reflection. "And keep it together tonight. No matter what happens, don't flip the table."

Giving herself one more affirming nod, she stood up straight and left her bathroom. She grabbed her phone from where she had discarded it on the bare mattress and tucked it into her pocket while she slipped from her room.

Her path was illuminated by golden wall sconces, making it easy to retrace the steps she had taken earlier- not like she couldn’t walk through these halls blind folded if she had to. The distant chatter emitting from the dining room grew louder with each step, causing a nervous burn to bubble up into her throat at the impending reunion.

Stepping quietly up to the archway, she lingered outside the propped doors and peeking around the frame. Her parents weren’t in their seats yet, which made her release a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding at the brief respite the universe had given her. 

The table was donned in a clean blue tablecloth and gold embellished napkins and plates, a glass of chilled white wine at each seat. Hoseok was seated on the opposite side of the table from the door, his glass pinched between a few fingers and leaning heavily onto Namjoon’s shoulder, laughing at something on his phone. Namjoon was also smiling, his dimples on display for all to see. He looked about the same as she remembered- cropped brown hair still damp from a shower, strong yet soft face, and taller than the rest of them. The only thing that seemed different was that his shoulders had almost doubled in width, probably from lugging around wheelbarrows and sacks of soil and compost all day.

To his left was who she had to assume was Jungkook, judging by his rounded eyes and nose. He had her doing a double-take: His hair was much longer than he had kept it when they were younger, and fell in waves down to his cheeks and down the back of his neck. He had also seemingly bulked up like Namjoon, and grown another 3 inches in height since they had last spoken.

The remaining seats were empty. No sight of the Seokjin or the rest of them anywhere. 

Hoseok must’ve felt her nerves leaching from her form, as his eyes suddenly met hers from across the room causing his eyes to light up and a sly smile to break across his face. 

“Oh Y/N! Come sit near me.” He flailed his hand wildly, attempting to beckon her over to join in on the fun. 

Namjoon’s eyes shot up from his phone to connect with hers, and he put his phone into his pocket and came to a clumsy stand. 

“Y/N.” His dimpled smile was overtaken by shock, as he came around the table to pull her into one of his signature bear hugs. 

“H-hey.” Her response was muffled by his sweater as he crushed her to his chest. She could hear Hoseok giggling at her awkwardness and it made her cheeks flush with embarrassment. 

Namjoon released her from the hug and ruffled her hair affectionately. “It’s good to see you again. I didn’t know you were coming back.” 

Y/n laughed uncomfortably and fiddled with the edge of her sweater. “I mean, technically I didn’t either until this morning.” 

He gave her a quizzical look but seemed to go with not asking any questions for now, instead moving to the side so she could wave in Jungkook’s direction. 

“Hi, Jungkook.” 

His eyes gave her a once over before flickering down to play with the frayed edges of his placemat. “Hi.” 

“Oh Jungkook, don’t be shy! She’s just as weird and annoying as she always was.” Hoseok chirped from his seat. 

Y/n let out a defiant sound. “I am not! You said yourself earlier today that I could never be annoying.” 

Jungkook's eyes flickered between the two of them, and let a small smile grace his features. 

“Who, me? I’d never say something so preposterous.” Hoseok held a hand to his chest in mock offense. 

“Preposterous? That’s a big word for you.” Namjoon chimed in, scoffing while he plopped into his seat with a humored scrunch of his face. 

Y/n laughed at Hoseoks sputtered defense, the way they fell back into a comfortable banter eased the ice settling over her skin at the impending arrival of her parents and reminded her of the things she had missed from home and hadn't let herself dwell on for years.

She took a seat across from Namjoon, and slid her chair into place even if it made Hoseok send her a pout at her act of betrayal for not sitting with him. She felt content listening to Namjoon and Hoseok jesting with each other, and let her eyes wander through the royal blue and gold dining room to examine every inch of detail in the room. It filled her with pride to see what she had envisioned come to life, even if she was still mulling over the details of how it came to be. During their journey around the room, her eyes found Jungkook’s, who had been stealing sideways glances at her from his seat since she’d sat down. He quickly averted his eyes, pretending he had been looking at something over her shoulder instead. Or at least, she had thought he was pretending. 

“Do you like the updated design? I’m a bit bummed that I missed getting to show you myself.” Her mother’s voice sounded from behind her. 

She whirled sharply to take her in-and it made her heart squeeze. People don’t talk about the hard parts of not talking to a family member. Everyone likes to talk about the part where they don’t miss them anymore, or when they couldn’t care less about a triumphant praise of their past self's decision making. But they don’t talk about the years you miss out on or the collateral damage of losing connections with those in shared circles- her mother's face carrying just a couple of new wrinkles that weren’t as prominent before a a glaring piece of evidence to the years missed between them. Four years of laughter that etched her laugh lines deeper into her cheeks, or smiles that left permanent crinkles in her eyes that she didn’t get to see. 

Y/n clambered to her feet, and she felt her mother’s eyes following her every movement. 

“I do. They look just as lovely as I’d have imagined.” Y/n managed to force the syllables off her tongue in what she assumed sounded genuine, but she couldn’t tell if her mother saw right through her or not like she used to. 

“I’m glad.” She tilted her head to gaze around the room. “Your father spared no expense to match it to your descriptions as best he could.” She took a tentative step closer, and that’s when Y/n recognized something she didn’t expect: Her mother, Mariah Wörner-one of the most confident, intelligent and strongest women she had ever known-was just as nervous as she was. The way her fingers held onto her own elbows from where her forearms crossed in front of her like a lifeline gave it away. She had expected her to be angry. Hysterical. Enraged. Disappointed. Or even some combination of any of those to take hold of her and spit out insults in fiery waves into her skin or stare daggers into her spine. But instead, her mothers eyes were shaky and uncertain. Scared.

Y/n didn’t know how to answer her, and floundered for a moment in the sudden silence that enveloped the room. The men seemingly distracted by their own devices, trying hard to not look like they were paying attention.

“Your father is cooking tonight, he insisted that he make something for you on your first night back.” Her mother floated over to her usual seat towards the end of the table, and nervously shuffled into her seat. 

“Oh that’s-” Y/n tried to reign in the sudden strong urge to cry, “That’s nice.” She melted back into her seat, feeling like her soul was floating outside of her body. 

“Roland is at a friend's house until Monday. After this spring, we are looking at enrolling him in the same middle school you went to in Hershey.  As such, he’s trying to soak up all the time he can with his friends.” Her mother let out a melodious laugh. “And you know me, I can’t ever say no to you guys.” 

Her sentence hung heavily on Y/n’s consciousness. You didn’t have a problem with that the last time we spoke, Y/n thought to herself bitterly, but she held her tongue to keep it from slipping out.

Her mother occupied herself with unfolding her napkin and resting it on her lap. The silence lingered, the only sounds being the rustle of fabric as people shifted uncomfortably in their seat. 

Y/n wanted nothing more than to both ask a million questions and reignite the argument where it left off, or to run into her mother’s arms and apologize for not giving them another chance to explain themselves. Her conflicting emotions felt overwhelming, feeding into her dissociation. 

Her father burst through the doors separating the dining room from the kitchen, a handful of hot pads stacked in his hands. He looked tired, his brow furrowed as he scanned the room. He stopped looking around when he met Y/n’s eyes, and she saw his own harden in determination.

Here it comes. She thought to herself, bracing herself for him to start reprimanding her. He began to make his way towards her, tossing the hot pads on the table leaving Namjoon to frantically try to catch them before they slid into his chest. 

Y/n began to stand up to greet him, but barely made it six inches off of her seat before her father wrapped his arms tightly around her shoulders. He smelt of butter, garlic, and spices as he held her tightly to his chest- it’s as if he thought the moment he let go she would run.

It took her a moment to realize that he was hugging her, not holding her hostage. Y/n let her arms robotically wind their way loosely around her father's back, not fully conscious of her own movements. For a moment she wondered if she had fallen asleep upstairs and that this was all a dream, or if she had actually tripped out front and hit her head. He surely should be yelling at her by now. After a few seconds of silence he let go of her, and gripped her shoulders tightly in his hands. 

“Dad- what’s-”

“I don’t care.” His voice was warm and firm. 

“I don’t understand what you mean?” Y/ns hands grabbed at her father's to try and remove them. She began to feel self-conscious of the way everyone was looking at this open display of vulnerability. She tried to take his hands off of her shoulders to stop herself from crying at the closeness that she had missed. 

“All of this-” He gestured a finger wildly between Y/n, her mother, and himself, “-I don’t care about that right now. I missed you. Let’s move that aside for tonight and just enjoy dinner, yeah?” 

She felt her eyes burning, and swallowed to keep herself in check. She nodded. 

Her father broke into a giddy smile, and he released her. “Toll!” He spun around and quickly made his way through the swinging door, disappearing with a faint “Wunderbar!”.  Only for his head to pop out again not more than a second later, a stack of cork hot pads in his hands that he tossed onto the table with a flying arc. “Can you guys spread those out? I’m going to bring everything out here.”  With that, his head disappeared into the kitchen again.

 Namjoon began to pass the hot pads around and Jungkook stood up to help him evenly distribute them. Not thirty seconds had passed before her dad came back out-a large tray of German potato dumplings, Kartoffelklöße, and placed them in the center. He winked at her and walked briskly back to the kitchen to carry out an array of what Y/n recognized as some of her old favorites.

Crispy roasted brussel sprouts, honey garlic carrots, buttered corn, and pan seared chicken to go with the dumplings. When he placed the last tray, he sat at the head of the table closest to the kitchen, practically glowing with pride at the feast he had prepared. Her dad didn’t waste his time beginning to fill up his own plate, stacking dumplings and chicken on top of each ether with haste. He looked up at her when he noticed she wasn’t moving. 

“Bitte, iss!” He gestured exuberantly to the display, and picked up his fork to shovel the first bite in. 

The rest of the table began to help themselves, and Y/n followed suit. A more comfortable silence fell over the table now that everyone had distracted themselves with curating their own plates. They had made it into a few minutes of clanking silverware and the occasional clear of someone's throat without so much as a word. But Y/n didn't mind-it gave her plenty of time to dissociate even further from the reality she had naively thrown herself into.

“Will Jin be joining us?” Her mother broke the silence, glancing from her plate to Hoseok as she pushed a carrot around her plate. 

Hoseok looked up from cutting his chicken, the shake of the table cloth near his bouncing leg being the only sign of nerves he let himself show. 

“He was supposed to be, but Jimin roped him into dinner at the Adelaide. He has been trying to find someone to sit with him tonight so he’s not by himself, and after being turned down by Yoongi for the dozenth time he moved onto his next victim.” He shoveled another bite into his mouth quickly, hoping to avoid being the only one speaking.

“What about the others?” Y/n didn’t realize it was her own voice until she felt her mother’s gaze on the side of her face. 

“Last I heard Yoongi was called for an urgent maintenance call about an hour ago, so who knows when he’ll be back.” He shrugged, and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “His parent’s have been back in Korea since the Lunar New Year. They’ve only been coming back for maybe 6 months of the year-if that. One of his cousins had twins last year so, more of a reason to keep visiting.” He paused to take a sip from his glass of his wine. “My folks are down at the Adelaide. They usually eat there for dinner anymore, or they drive to my sister’s place. Something about finally getting to enjoy the environment and not having to be the environment.” 

Y/n nodded, trying to stay engaged with anything other than her confused state of mind at the moment. This is not how she expected her first interaction with her parents to go. 

“My aunt and unc-Jin’s parents-Have been traveling mostly.” Namjoon piped in letting Hoseok have a break, reaching over to grab another dumpling. “They all but retired this past January, and have been trying to make the most of it together. Though they haven't officialy gone through the process to finalize it, and I personally think they are hanging on until this year is over. Mr. Jeon has been off teaching a semester or two up at MIT. He has been trying to convince the architecture professor to bring some students down here to come visit the hotel and estate-he likes to bounce ideas off of fresh minds.” 

Y/n hummed in response, turning her attention to the flavors bouncing off of her tongue. She took a risk and snuck glances at both parents. They were exchanging their own private looks; her mother’s was worried, and her father’s was nothing short of elated. Her father’s hand rested gently atop her mother’s, his thumb drawing soothing circles onto he skin. She caught her father’s gaze and he grinned, his eyes crinkling just like she used to remember, if not even brighter. 

She took another bite of corn to keep herself from crying.

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The rest of dinner was surprisingly uneventful. Her father had been true to his word, and avoided making dinner awkward, while also not acting like he was forcing positivity down everyone’s throats. His laughter was loud and genuine, and he always left discussion open for Y/n to contribute if she wanted to, and didn’t bat an eye if she didn’t. He was, in every sense of the word, beaming. It was as if the idea of her just being at the table with him again made his day. And that realization is what led her to where she is now - huddled damp in her towel on her freshly washed and made bed, sniffling away the last of her emotional breakdown in the shower. They had missed her. They had wanted her here. And she chose not to come back. A new wave of fresh tears built up in her eyes before she could stop them again, as her spiral started its cycle all over again.

Guilt. Hope. Anger. Calm. Over and over again.

She left because of them-what they had done was unforgivable in her eyes. But here they were, wanting to sew back together a rip they made. Should she not give them the chance? 

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock so soft on her door that she just brushed it off as the house settling itself. She refused to let herself linger on anything that might make her heart race, trying to keep her feet planted in reality-One paranormal experience was more than enough for her today.

It did light a fire under her to move, taking it as her sign to pull herself together by tossing on an oversized t-shirt and sleep shorts so she could curl up under the covers for the rest of the night and ignore everything in favor of sleep. Stopping by the cracked closet door to give it a gentle shove closed, and finished the last steps over to her bed.  But just as she was pulling the comforter's edges down, she heard the knock again, cementing the sound as definitely not the house settling. Padding softly over to the door, she opened it just a crack to see who was interrupting her self-pitying time. 

Her mother was standing there, shifting from one foot to the other. Her hair was pulled up and away like she had always done before bed, like she had intended to do the same thing as Y/n before she had found herself outside of her door. 

“Are you…alright?” Y/n opened the door a bit more to get a better look at her. Her eyes were rimmed red, her face was weary and sagged from fatigue. They really must’ve had the same plans. 

“May I come in?” Her mother’s eyes swung from left to right, checking over her shoulder for anyone that may be listening in. Y/n wordlessly moved the side and opened the door just wide enough to let her slip through. Her mother quickly turned to shut the door behind herself, and slid the lock into place. Once she heard the click of the door close, she let out a breath of relief before turning to face Y/n. 

“We need to talk.” Her mother folded her arms over herself. 

Y/n snorted. “Understatement of the century.” 

“I’m being serious, Y/n.” This is truly the most nervous she had ever seen her mother, causing Y/N to reign herself in again with a sigh.

“Look mom, I’m really tired right now. I just want to go to bed. Can we talk about this another time?” Y/n tried to keep her tone even. She was just getting out of the angry phase of her cycle, she didn’t need it reignited. 

“No, we have to discuss it now. It’s crucial.” 

Y/n sighed and plopped onto the foot of her bed with a huff. She looked up at mother expectantly, waving her hand for her to continue. “Well, say what you need to say then.” 

Her mother pinched her nose between her fingers. “Y/n, I didn't come here to fight. I came here to….” Her mother paused, choosing her next words carefully.  “I came here to give you some advice.” 

“Advice?” Y/n's eyebrow rose in disbelief. 

“Yes.” Her mother pulled her silk robe closer around her form. 

“And this couldn’t wait for tomorrow because…?” 

Y/n watched as she exhaled sharply through her nose, a telltale sign that she was growing impatient. “I’m sure that you’ve missed all of your friends -and rightfully so- but it’d be in your best interest that you keep some distance between a select few of them.”  

Y/n recoiled at her mother’s words, her own coming out before she could stop them. “Excuse me? And who would the ‘select few of them’ be?” 

Her mother’s eyes met Y/n’s with authority, and her response was short and stern. “Yoongi.” 

“Are you serious?” Y/n gaped at her in disbelief.

“Jungkook too.” 

“I can’t believe you’re being serious right now.” Y/n shook her head, her rage beginning to bubble to the surface. 

“Y/n please listen to me-” 

“Oh yes, please! Share with the class just as to why I can’t talk to my friends.” Y/n gestured to the empty room . 

“I…” Her mother’s face fell, as did her voice. “I can’t.” 

Y/n could’ve heard a pin drop from the front door it was so silent. 

“Get out.” 

“Please, you have to just trust me-” Her mother began to plead with her. 

“No. I don’t have to do anything. You said you didn’t want to argue, yet here you are. Making decisions for everyone else and not bothering to give anyone else your reasoning.” 

“Y/n-”

“God, I was so stupid to think that maybe you had changed based off of one dinner. Nope. Now you're in my room, giving me orders and being secretive just like always.” Y/n’s voice began to rise in volume, and her mother took a cautious step towards the door. 

“That is not true. I care about you. I love you! I’m just trying to protect you,” Her mother tried to reach for her, but Y/n side-stepped out of her reach. 

“Protect me?! Protect me from what?” Y/n was so enraged, that her eyes began to water again much to her own embarrassment. 

Her mother stared into her eyes, opening and closing her mouth repeatedly. 

Y/n let out a dry laugh. “Let me guess, you can’t tell me.” 

“You wouldn’t understand-” 

“Bullshit. I would. You just don’t want to tell me.” Y/ns shoulders began to deflate. 

“That is not true.” Her mother pointed her finger at Y/n with venom. 

“Then tell me.” 

“Why can’t you just listen to me, why must you always make this so difficult.” Her mother threw her hands up into the air in exasperation. 

“ME? I’m the one being difficult?” 

“Yes!” Her mother hissed out from her clenched teeth. 

“You’re the one that sent the invitation to me!” 

“That was your father’s idea- I wanted to-” Her mother started but Y/n cut her off again.

“Oh so you don’t want me here then?”

Her mother’s eyes were alight with fury. “That is not what I said. If you’d let me finish-”

“No, actually I think I’ve heard enough. This is fucking ridicu-” 

“That is enough.” Mariah’s tone was cutting, and final. She stomped towards Y/n and gripped her upper arms in her long hands. “You will listen to me.” Y/n had never seen such rage in her mother’s eyes, not once. “Do not think that for one second turning you away all those years ago doesn’t haunt me, or that a single day went by where I didn’t think of you. You will do as I say, and you will not ask questions. I will not-” Her voice cracked, forcing her to pause. “I can not lose you again. I will not lose another child.” 

The way her mother’s eyes bore into her own, and the way her hands gripped onto Y/n's shoulders with such desperation knocked the air out of her lungs. She was still angry, yes, but she couldn’t find it in herself to yell at her mother-not when she looked so vulnerable and small in front of her. Two words she’d have never used to describe her mother. Her mother’s hands released themselves from her shoulders, and she walked herself with dragging feet towards the door and unlocked it with a trembling hand.

“I can’t tell you what to do, you’re right. But please at least try to listen to trust me, if not even just a little.” Her tired eyes looked at Y/n over her shoulder with so much defeat, that slowly morphed into one that was resolute. Distant and cold. “Keep your door locked at night. And if you think you hear your father walking around the house during the night…” Her mother paused within the threshold, debating her next words. “Don’t get out of bed, and don’t, under any circumstances, open the door.” 

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Next Chapter

Toll- Great!

Wunderbar- Wonderful!

Bitte iss! -Please eat!

[blue-lotus333]

💀Goddesses of death💀

Ereshkigal: Mesopotamian goddess of death, the dead, and the underworld.

Ereshkigal is the queen of the underworld, the keeper of balance, the punisher of evil & maintains order against chaos. She may have also been associated with the earth & the waters of life in Mesopotamian legend. She was associated with the city of Kutha and featured in the myth of Inanna's Descent to the Underworld. She was also connected to other deities such as Nergal, Ninazu, and Ningishzida. Ereshkigal was said to be the sister of Inanna.

Oya: African Goddess/orisha of death, storms, winds & thunder.

Oya is a powerful goddess/orisha in Nigeria who controls storms and death and is married to the thunder god, Shango. She is a shape-shifter who often appears as a mortal woman or animal while overseeing justice and bringing sudden change. She is also a guardian of women and the dead, able to call forth death or delay it. Oya is associated with rebirth and magic, and her favorite colors are maroon and copper.

The Keres: Greek goddesses of Death, bloodshed & violence.

The Keres were female death spirits and goddesses who personified violent death. They were drawn to bloody, intense deaths on battlefields and were daughters of Nyx, Goddess of Night. They did not have the power to kill but would wait and then feast on the dead. They were described as dark beings with gnashing teeth & claws, with a thirst for human blood. They would hover over the battlefield and search for dying/ wounded men.

The Morrigan: Irish Goddess of death, fate, war & sovereignty.

The Morrígan, also called the Phantom Queen, is a bewitching goddess associated with war and fate, often appearing as a crow, encouraging bravery and strength in battle, & foretells doom or victory. The Morrígan is often described as a trio of sisters, representing the goddess's role as a guardian and warrior. She can appear in many forms like an old woman, a crow, a beautiful sorceress, or a fearsome creature.

Mictecacihuatl: Aztec Goddess of death & the underworld.

Also known as the Lady of the Dead, Alongside Mictlantecuhtli, her consort, she rules over Mictlán, the lowest Aztec underworld realm. She guides the departed souls on their transformative journey from life to the afterlife and embodies the profound duality of existence. The Dia de los Muertos is a vibrant festival that allows families to honor deceased loved ones with ofrendas and calavera imagery, inspired by Mictecacihuatl, who is now called Santa La muerte.

Kali-ma: Hindu Goddess of destruction, death, change & time.

Kali-ma is the wrathful & protective force of Shakti (energy), She's a caring mother to her devotees/innocent people and the destroyer of evil, she expresses the dual nature of the destruction that must come before new beginnings. Kali ma embodies the power of all, transcending good & evil to protect her people against negativity. Kali ma is Mother Nature, primordial, nurturing, and devouring, She is vested in freeing beings, granting salvation.

Hel: Norse Goddess of death, the underworld & decay.

Hel, the half living and half dead goddess, is one of Loki's children, and rules over the realm of the dead, she mostly receives those who died of illness or old age in her realm. Hel is often depicted as a fearsome figure, and in Her realm, Helheim, is considered one of the nine worlds in Norse cosmology and is located in the lowest part of the universe. In the events of Ragnarok, Hel plays a crucial role. It is foretold that she will lead an army of the dead to fight against the gods.

Morana: Slavic Goddess of death, winter, magic & dreams.

Morana is a Slavic goddess associated with seasonal agrarian rites based on the idea of death and rebirth of nature. the death of Morana at the end of winter becomes the rebirth of Spring of the Goddess Vesna, representing the coming of Spring, joy & life. She is still worshipped to this day and is often described as a vengeful, powerful goddess. She is married to the spring/love God Yarilo but their relationship is not seen as healthy.

Izanami: Japanese Goddess of Death, darkness & creation.

Izanami is a Shintō creation mother goddess who became the Japanese goddess of death after she died while giving birth. Her name, Izanami, means ''the female who invites.''. She can create many lands and other divine beings, has the power of death and could command gods/spirits of the underworld. Izanami & Izanagi are the creators of the Japanese archipelago and the creators of the powerful deities Amaterasu, Tsukuyomi, and Susanoo.

[yoongleboonglepie]

Pechsträhne Chapter 1

BTS x Reader

Series Masterlist

Chapter playlist-Youtube music

Chapter Playlist-Spotify

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A/N: I can't even describe how excited and proud of myself I am to finally get this out on paper. My brain has been riddled with this story ever since I had a dream that inspired it. I can't wait to share this with y'all! I'm going to be figuring out how to make a masterlist tonight that I will keep updated with the main story, along with any extra goodies like playlists or Pinterest boards if anyone would be interested in any of that stuff. Please enjoy. Lots of love ~ Delyn <3

word count: ~13k

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You have been invited to celebrate with us! 

The Wörner Hotel and Estate is celebrating 150 years of providing excellent service to all of our guests, and we want you to be a part of it! Built in 1875 by German settlers Matthäus and Felizitas Wörner, it is a nature lover’s dream; nestled between the edge of Michaux State Forest and historic Gettysburg Pennsylvania. This luxury hotel is the perfect balance between historical and luxury. We have everything you may need from live entertainment, multi-room suites, a freshly updated swimming pool, 24-hour room service, daily activities or fitness classes, valet parking, onsite grocery, and more. And with over one hundred acres of gorgeous grounds to explore, you’ll never get bored! Well, what are you waiting for? There’s no greeting warmer than at The Wörner Hotel and Estate!

Y/n’s fingers fiddled with the gold embossed invitation absent-mindedly, her eyes finding it difficult to keep their attention on anything else other than the piece of paper that felt so heavy in her lap. She had fought herself incessantly about what to do with it since it had wedged itself haphazardly into her mail slot, a physical embodiment of what a thorn in her side it was. Its arrival shouldn't have caused as much emotional turmoil as it did. She should have expected it, she had told herself repeatedly in order to calm her nerves, which worked about as well as a sinner praying their way through a last-ditch effort to make it to heaven. And despite what this invitation may say, Wörner Hotel and Estate seemed like anything but heaven to her right now - Hell would be a more fitting name. Seeing the sketched out image of the hotel printed on the bottom shot her back into her childhood memories of sitting short and wide-eyed as she watched different guests all busy up the stairs to enjoy their vacation, or where the tours would disappear onto the different walking trails. Only turning her attention away when she realized they had not noticed her presence, to whatever toys she set up on the front veranda that day- usually animal figurines whose feet and faces had been gnawed off by the family dog, or severely mistreated Barbies.

She floated through all of her memories of growing up in the hotel with great resistance: Stampeding through the gardens with the staff children after cold elementary school days; Guests that just never seemed to leave; Her parents lavish parties in the ballroom; Phantom touches in the lobby; Swimming in the lake up at the state park on warm summer nights with her sisters and younger brother and pigging out on smores late into the evening.

Her younger sister’s death.

Ghostly figures in long hallways, reaching their hands out to grab her. Always watching.

Her friends. Her fight with her parents.

Everything she didn’t want to remember had been stamped with a wax seal and thrown back into her orbit against her will. She hasn’t spoken to her parents in four years as of this past Christmas, and her younger brother Roland has become increasingly difficult to keep on the phone for longer than 10 minutes before he loses interest in their conversations. Her elder sister Amelia, only three years older than y/n herself, has been radio silent since the night Y/N left the hotel and didn’t return. Their relationship was barely kept afloat by obligatory texts on holidays and birthdays. 

All this makes Y/n wonder why they ever thought she would go back and why they even sent this invitation to her? Who still even worked there?  And what in god's name took over her mind to have her bag packed with a rushed explanation to her two very confused roommates, and seated on the first Amtrak train from D.C back to Pennsylvania? Maybe it was the residual emptiness of missing her family from the past holiday season, or maybe it was a nagging feeling in her stomach that told her she needed to. 

The train slowed down as it reached some small station outside the border of Pennsylvania state lines that Y/N can’t be bothered to hear the name of. She glanced out the window to watch a few stragglers shuffle on and off of the train car in front of her thoughtlessly, their impatient and rushed steps of no real interest to her.

With it being mid morning on a weekday, she had just missed rush hour and consequently the train wasn’t as busy. This gave her space and time to think about what to text to her driver-whoever that is-which she hasn’t done yet and probably should. She only had less than an hour before she arrived at the Philadelphia station, and the drive from the hotel was almost triple that. With a gentle jolt, the train begins to pick up momentum again, its grinding metal and loud engine squealing at her to hurry up.

Biting her lip, she pulls out her phone and looks at the messy pen scribble of her mother’s handwriting on the bottom of her invitation: a phone number she doesn’t recognize and a short “Call if you need a ride :)” message next to it. The friendliness of the smiley face seemingly contradictory of the basic impersonal invitation she was sure they sent to anyone and everyone.

 Maybe they didn’t expect her to come and they just felt obligated to send it? Turning the thought over in her head, she shook it away with a shudder. It was too late to have these doubts now-the hum of the train beneath her seat and the “Welcome to Pennsylvania!” sign making that abundantly clear. Punching the number into her phone, she hit the call button before she could give herself time to second-guess it. It rings once. Twice. A third time. Only stopping when the receiver tells her the number can’t be reached and to try again later. 

“Fuck.” Y/N curses under her breath, remembering that she is, in fact, in a metal tube speeding through tunnels and trees that really push the boundaries of her average cell phone line. She types the number in again and waits this time until the train pulls into another small stop right at the southernmost part of Pennsylvania. She had not maybe 30 minutes (if she was lucky) before her train ride would come to its dreaded end. Thumbing the call button, she waited. This time it rang only twice before an overly enthusiastic voice answered on the other line. 

“A warm greeting from The Wörner Hotel and Estate! Front desk and lobby services, this is Seokjin speaking. How may I assist you today?” His voice was smooth and light on the ears, but it hit her as anything but light. The name made her entire form tense up, and a nervous sweat prick at her brow. The reality of what she was doing truly settling into her system as the voice of an old friend forced her to face the consequences of her actions head-on. It's fine, She told herself, he probably doesn't even care. It's been years...

“Hello? May I help you?” He quipped again, a bit less perky than the first time.

Realizing that she hadn’t responded she choked out “Yes! Yes, one moment please!” She mentally face-palmed herself for such a clumsy response. “This is Y/N. Y/N Wörner. Anslem and Mariah’s daughter.” 

A moment of fuzzy silence met her ears causing her to shift anxiously in her seat. She was in the process of checking the phone screen to see if he had hung up when shuffling noises on the other end of the line jolted her phone back to her ear and his silver-tone voice cut through the static. 

“Oh! Yes forgive me-Mrs. Wörner had mentioned you might reach out.” He let out a smooth chuckle before continuing on.  “I assume you are calling for transportation services?” If he was surprised, his tone didn’t show it.

Y/N nodded, before catching that he could not see her with a “Yes, please!”

“Great! What’s the pick up address?” Y/N could hear the smile in his words and she flushed with embarrassment at how not put together she sounded. What a wonderful "first" impression she's giving him of her adult self.

“It’s going to be the Philadelphia Amtrak station.” Her eyes flitted to the trees dotted with new buds outside her window, finding their gentle sway in the wind soothing enough to qualm her racing heart. 

“Awesome... And what time will your train be arriving at the station, Ms. Wörner?” She heard the click of a pen, and the scratch of its ink on the paper. 

“Well, you see about that…” She trailed off as the train began to leave the small station, the pen scratching mimicking her pause. “Maybe 20 minutes or so?” She laughed nervously at her own obvious lack of foresight. If he had managed to scrounge up any good impression of her during their call, she had just metaphorically tossed it out of her train window.

Seokjin guffawed on the other end of the line and openly sputtered out a “20 minutes?! That's an almost 3 hour drive, miss. I will send someone out right away, but will you be alright waiting?” Y/n could tell he was trying his best to cover up his anxious outburst with concern, and the formality in his phrase feeling foreign and uncomfortable to her ears.

“I’ll be fine. I’ll grab something to eat and hunker down on a bench. It’s my fault for not calling sooner…” Y/N’s voice trickled out as she realized how this might make them look to her parents-making a guest wait for longer than they would approve of. She made a mental note to herself that she would just happen to forget to mention it during any conversations with them.

“Alright then Ms. Wörner. Your driver will reach out to you via text to share their information, location services, and a description of their vehicle. " She heard the unmistakable clicking of frantic computer keys as the previous anxiety in his tone faded and his customer service voice took over once again. "Please have your phone on hand with notifications on in case they need to reach you with any questions. Is there anything else I can help you with today?

“No, that is everything. Thank you, Jin.”  The nickname spilled from her lips with a practiced ease that surprised her own self, but he carried on like he didn’t seem to notice. 

“Wonderful! I will see you later in the evening.” She could hear him typing something into his computer before the clacking ceased and a moment of silence enveloped them again. This time the silence felt eerily wrong and awkward. She could almost hear the sharp exhale before his voice drifted through the phone at a volume so quiet she almost missed it.

"I'm sorry- I couldn't catch that." She laughed trying to lighten the sudden shift in atmosphere.

“It’s…” He paused, seemingly weighing the sound of his own words on his tongue. “It’s good to have you back, Y/n.” 

The dial tone signaled that the line had ended, but she still found herself holding the speaker to her ear much longer than she needed to. The way he said her name with so much heaviness had her whole world spinning. It was both nerve-wracking and comforting that he remembered her. It meant she hadn’t been gone long enough for anyone to truly forget as easily as she had wished they could-for she should know better than to expect from them what she could never do within herself-and she couldn’t decide if that was a blessing or a curse.

_________________________________________

Hi there, Y/N!  I am about 15 minutes out from the station. I will park out front in the pick up line- black Hyundai, license plate no. JHP-0613. See you soon!! :) - Hoseok J.

Y/n used a greasy finger to swipe the notification bar down to read the message. So Hoseok ended up staying to work at the hotel too? She tapped the straw of her empty soda cup to her lips in thought. She would’ve bet money that he would’ve at least been working in the live entertainment part of the hotel; destined to follow in his parents’ footsteps more so than one of their chauffeur drivers.

His father, Jeonghun Jung or Mr. Jung, had been an exceptional live swing and jazz singer in the evenings in the main restaurant on the property, the Adelaide, with his mother Misuk Jung performing duets with him on rare occasions. Hoseok had been his mother’s favorite dance partner during her weekly swing dancing classes, and he had done wonderful stage work even at a young age. He should’ve had a straight shot to take their place once they retired, and they couldn’t possibly still be performing these days at the rate they had with their age, Y/n mused. Unless things really had changed drastically while she had been away. It made her wonder if everyone had stayed at the hotel except for her.

She scoffed at the thought. Last she heard the Min’s boy applied to a college up in New York, and Jins cousin always was a smart kid-he must’ve left first chance he could. They had been more of her sister's crowd even though their age gap wasn't that drastic-having grown in distance from Y/n herself once high school made that small age gap seem wider than it was.

Shaking her thoughts away, she wiped the grease of her fast food meal on her pants and typed a simple “Great! See you then.”

She swung her bags onto her shoulders with a grunt, and leisurely strolled through the station, only pausing to toss her soda cup away in a nearby trash can. Y/n pushed through the exit and found a spot for herself near the pick-up line that wasn't too uncomfortably close to other passengers awaiting their rides.

Taking in her surroundings, she eyed the bridge leading up to the station and watched all the pedestrians walking their own beat into the cement. The thing about Pennsylvania is that anywhere in the ungodly large state feels familiar. Maybe it’s the constant stark contrast of natural beauty and old cement monstrosities, or perhaps it’s the feeling that every place in this humid state is haunted with its own age and existence. Being surrounded by the bustling nature of Philly’s atmosphere reminded her of taking trips here with her family, having walked the same sidewalk following the bridge to and from the train station many times. 

A rhythmic vibration grew in volume and stole her attention away from her surroundings as a sleek black car pulled into the spot closest to her. The hip-hop song cut off as the driver's side door opened and a head of long wavy brown hair framing a wide heart shaped grin popped out from within. 

“Y/n! Wow!” He let out a short whistle as he leaped onto the sidewalk with ease, and traipsed over to wrap her in a tight hug before she could protest. “It’s been waayyy too long.”

Her arms loosely wrapped themselves around his small waist, and all she could smell was orange blossom and pine-The latter being one of the signature smells surrounding the estate and the former being purely just how she remembered Hoseok. For a few moments the smell took her back to sitting shoulder to shoulder with him and his mother, a large mug of mulled orange tea,  and their backs bent over a card game with crisp autumn air permeating the room from an open window. At that time it had been nearly impossible to keep him off his feet after he had suffered an injury from playing too roughly with the other boys. He had been practically melting from boredom, and had lost a lot of his usual shine from being sheltered in on himself. A shine that radiated off of him like a thousand suns at the present day. 

“Ugh, not long enough." She lamented, and he released her from the hug with a dramatic roll of his eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah. Save that attitude for your folks, not me.” His eyes trailed from her and the backpack and overstuffed carry on bag digging into her shoulders, before his warm brown eyes found hers again with a click of his tongue. “Is that all you brought? I figured for such a long stay there would at least be a suitcase-hell even a second backpack.” 

Y/n tilted her head at him, confused. “ Such a long stay?” 

Hoseok raised a brow at her response and chuckled. “I mean, yeah. I assume you’re staying for the entire anniversary celebration schedule-are you not?” He gestured to the straps on her shoulder, and she immediately shrugged them off and into his waiting hands. The relief her shoulder blades felt was unmatched at the moment. 

She hesitated in her response, choosing instead to watch him pop the trunk and place her bags in. She hadn’t actually thought about how long she’d be here, she realized. Weirdly enough, her mind felt too fuzzy to bother worrying about another thing today-so she waited for his eyes to glance up at her over the open trunk to give him a shrug. 

“I didn’t think that far ahead, if I’m being honest.” 

He let out a boisterous laugh and slammed the trunk shut. “Seriously, you must not have changed that much.” Continuing to chuckle, he rounded the side of the car to the passenger side, and swung the door open in a dramatic gesture and a flash of his blinding smile. “After you, Ms. Wörner.” 

With a smile and a shake of her head, she settled into the front seat. He closed the door once certain she was fully in the car, and skipped to the driver side door and swung himself in and slammed the door in one swift move. 

“Are you always this casual with all your passengers?” Y/n turned to face him with a teasing smile. 

He snorted. “God, no-I like having my job.” He flicked the turn signal on for only a half second before swerving into the passing lane, immediately keeping pace with the other philly drivers. The hip hop song resumed at a lower volume than before, filling the car with a laid back atmosphere. “I have all my passengers sit in the back whenever possible. They can be really…” He paused trying to find the right word while switching lanes to take a westward exit. “Annoying.” he concluded. 

“And I’m not 'annoying' to you?” Y/n laughed, thinking about the amount of times he had referred to her as such as a child. 

“You?” He let his eyes flicker to her briefly, sliding a sly smile on his face before returning his gaze to the road. “Never.” 

The drive went by quickly with such an engaging driver by her side. He was sure to ask all about her time in D.C., and she readily supplied him with answers. She told him all about her starting school, then in turn dropping out after her first year after feeling like no major fit her goals (if she even knew what those were anymore). A fact she was usually much too embarrassed to share, but he took it with no judgement. Instead taking the conversation elsewhere, like her current hobbies and interests, or prodding into her dislike for her roommates with exaggerated humor. She didn’t realize how much she had missed talking with him. Why didn’t she reach out to him? To any of them? She wondered.

As if her brain liked being cruel her to when she was finally able to slip into states of peace, it forcefully pulled one of her last prominent memories of him.

Her face was hot and wet as she stomped out of the private dining room. The gentle sway of Nat King Cole that used to be her favorite around this time of year had become her least favorite thing in the world at the moment, each note hitting her ears sharply. Her head pounding in retaliation to what was once a subtle volume now seeming like it bounced tauntingly in her skull, telling her to have a ‘Merry Christmas”. If she wasn’t so angry she would’ve laughed at the irony. She didn’t get far down the festively lit hall before she ran face first into Hoseok, his hands still damp from having just been washed bracing her shoulders, and his concerned voice muffled by her own blood rushing through her ears. She met his worried and imploring eyes, his wavy hair only just gracing his brows back then, and all she saw reflecting back in his eyes was her own swollen and disheveled reflection. Then his face fell into the same shape everyone else in the dining room had. Pity.

She hated it. It made her skin crawl, and her stomach bubble in self-defensive rage. He was looking at her the same way Mr. and Mrs. Min just had. Like the Jeon and Kim families had. Like Hoseok’s parents had. It made her sick. 

“Did you know too?” She spat out. 

He stuttered at her sudden intensity. “W-what? What are you-” 

She pushed her finger into his chest sharply. “Don’t you lie to me, Hoseok Jung.” 

A moment of stillness gripped them both in a heavy hand that's fingers were closing in on them, one at a time in a tight fist, trying to take its time suffocating them. His eyes flickered back and forth between both of hers and then she saw it-his chin crinkled just so-and it gave him away to her in an instant. 

She let out a wet angry laugh that sounded closer to a sob. “So you too, huh?” She took a staggered step back, feeling like with every step the floor was pulling her deeper. Like it was trying to pull her through the floorboards so it could swallow her whole. At this moment she wanted it to. “Did everyone know?”

“Y/n, listen I-” His eyes were glassy, saying more to her than his words could.

“Save it.” She shoved past his outstretched hands and began the pathetic walk of shame back to her room. She hated crying in front of people, and it seems like everyone in the house had gotten a front row seat and an encore. She heard him call out for her, but it didn’t stop her. She didn’t have the strength to face any more betrayal than she already had.

“Y/n? You still with me?” Hoseok took one hand off the wheel to playfully wave it in front of her face.

She pushed his hand and her memories away in fake annoyance with a gentle ‘sorry’. 

He shook it off with a laugh.

“So what about you? Your parent-are they still performing at the Adelaide?” Y/n snuck a sideways glance to judge his response. 

He let out a heavy sigh. “Ah…no not really. My dad will sometimes sing some of his old classics on busy weekends, and my mom switched from swing classes to waltzing lessons. But otherwise they’re mostly retired from the entertainment industry and doting on my sister. Old age and achy bones and all that.” 

Y/n nodded along, trying not to ask the burning question of why he hadn’t taken their spot. Before the question could sear it’s way off her tongue he spoke again, seeming to read her thoughts. 

“You remember the Kims 2.0? Not Seokjin and Namjoon kinda Kims. The new Kims." He gave her befuddled expression a brief sideways glance and continued to clarify. "Thinking about it, I guess you probably didn’t get to spend as much time with them before you were sent off to all those different schools. And they were usually gone around the holidays as his parents don’t care too much for Christmas. They were only around for a couple months before they hired their son permanently.”

Y/n’s face scrunched in thought as she tried to remember their arrival. “The Kims 2.0?” 

Hoseok hummed. “Yeah. They were hired after y-” He seemed to catch himself “After I broke my leg-sometime around there. They do stage planning and such. They travel a lot and work remotely from California most of the time though.” 

When Y/n didn’t give him much of a reaction he clicked his tongue and moved on. 

“Well, their son, Taehyung-he’s got this singing voice that’s undeniably born for big band and jazz-they would’ve been a fool not to give him the job the second he turned 21.  It didn’t take much convincing for him to take my dad’s place.” There was tension in his tone that he seemed to be trying to cover with his usual nonchalance. But she could pick up on his discomfort-the a passage of time doing nothing to rust what had once been second nature-and decided to change the topic. 

“Huh. I guess the name sounds familiar…but tell me,” she turned her body to face him and folded her hands in her lap. “Who else stayed behind?” 

“Once a gossip, always a gossip.” He rolled his eyes, but another small genuine smile was breaking across his face. 

When he didn’t start talking immediately, she gave him an expectant look. 

“Alright, I’ll spoil the surprise, geez.” He turned the car onto an exit, signaling their time on major highways ending and the time of battlefield side roads and wooded winding paths etched into the scenery. Satisfied with that, she turned her head to look out her window- she could see the main town of Gettysburg in the distance, outlined by the setting sun. 

“Seokjin works the desk and maintains the lobby, as you are aware. Usually I work as a valet or chauffeur. But sometimes I pick up random jobs around the place when I’m not busy: like working the pool or picking up shifts at the convenience store and gift shop. Pretty much anywhere they need me.” He turned off the main road that would’ve sent them straight through downtown Gettysburg, and veered onto the start of the long scenic back roads that led to the Hotel and Estate. “Sometimes even giving Yoongi a hand with electrical issues when he needs-”

“Yoongi? I thought he went to a university in New York?” Y/n couldn’t contain her disbelief.

“Oh, yeah. He did, but came back about 3 years in. Said something about needing to figure some things out before he went back to finish.” 

“Oh.” 

“Yeah. Anyways, our Jiminie is one of our tour guides and the historian” Hoseok cooed, “You should pop into one of his tours of the property in the morning! I don’t know if anyone has gotten around to telling him about you coming back yet.” 

The way he said coming back with such finality settled heavily in her stomach-like he had expected her to come back-like he was expecting her to stay. She rolled her eyes at her own thoughts; that was definitely just her anxiety speaking. 

“Jungkook works housekeeping right now-but he’s been weighing going into security training. I’m sure he's just ecstatic to hear about you. “ Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows aggressively and gave her a teasing smile. 

“Oh shut up with that, he was always just my good friend.” Y/n flushed lightly, knowing full well Jungkook had not seen her as just a friend throughout their childhood. Always trailing after her like a puppy because for some reason her awkwardness, lack of social skills, and very strict way of organizing her animal figurines must have really drawn him in. He hadn’t ever actually said anything to her about it, choosing instead to be a good friend who was a great shoulder to lean on. But even with obliviousness being a top skill on her metaphorical resume, she had been able to tell. 

“Uh huh. You tell yourself that, Mrs. Jeon~” 

“Oh my god! We were FIVE. Playing house was serious business back then and you know it-we even got divorced twice. TWICE! Does the word divorce not mean anything to you?” Y/n couldn’t contain her laughter by the end of her defense, and neither could he. 

“What was the first one about again?” 

Y/n waved her hand dismissively “Oh-he wouldn’t let me name our pretend pet dolphin Shoeshine or something like that. Said the dolphin needed a more distinguished name.” 

“Damn, that really does sound like very serious business.” He cackled. 

“Don’t act like you’re innocent here!” She spun her entire body in her seat to face him “I also married YOU once. AND Yoongi.” 

He gave a loud overdramatic gasp. “So you admit to cheating on me? All these years I wondered…what a shame.” 

They dissolved into a fit of giggles before a comfortable silence settled in the vehicle. Glancing back over at him to quip another remark about their fake marriage, she paused. He seemed to want to say something else with the way his mouth tightened before opening momentarily-then snapping it shut with pursed lips. He must’ve decided to just say it, his voice breaking the silence.

“Your sister is still off in Europe, so we haven’t seen her since the last time you were both back for the holidays.” He flexed his fingers against the wheel to ease the budding tension from his body. She could tell he was avoiding bringing up what happened during that holiday visit that caused her sister to run to foreign college programs- and she couldn’t blame him.  Their reluctance to speak of the topic made it easy for him to quickly move on. 

“Roland goes to school nearby for now, but I don’t see him often enough to give you much more than that.” He offered with an apologetic shrug. “And last but not least-Namjoon has taken up landscaping maintenance and gardening. He does a great job with it too-It is what he went to school for after all.” Hoseok chuckled, trying to keep the mood light again.

“So he did make it to school?” Y/n quipped in. 

“Yeah, he did some hybrid program that had him in and out of California to study Botany and Horticulture, with a minor in some sort of plant management….something. You can ask him about the specifics.” 

“Huh.” Y/n fell back in her seat, her shoulders sagging against the seat.

“What?” He glanced over at her as he made a right turn onto the gradual hill that snaked it’s way to the front lawn gates.

“It’s just…” She saw the gates of the driveway in the distance and her heart tightened painfully in her chest. “Everyone stayed. I was so sure most of you would’ve banked the second they got the chance.” Everyone but me. 

His grip tightened on the wheel. 

“We tried, but it’s almost like this place-” He paused with a sharp exhale. “-you just feel like you never want to leave.” 

His words were genuine, but his smile was not. It was the first smile she’d seen from him today that didn’t meet his eyes

Pulling into the gate she felt her heart somehow squeeze tighter, and she tried to shake away the unsettling feeling that found a home in her chest at his words. Instead turning her attention to the old metal gates that were always propped open to welcome its endless flow of guests. The long front lawn decorated in hardy shrubs dotted  inbetween with budding nursery plants, the soil around them was still loose and fresh, probably new additions to welcome the coming of spring. Her eyes surveyed the clash of the familiar and unfamiliar. The plants looked different than the usual flora species she remembered them traditionally planting, it looked like someone was experimenting with a new layout-probably Namjoon- she concluded.  Hoseok took the gravel road at a relaxed place, giving her time to take it all in. The outside of the hotel remained the same- A combination of colonial and old European romance. Boxy, yet elegant, and still unimaginably huge. Her eyes flitted from the front stairs and followed to the right around to the side veranda built onto the sloping  hill, so you can gaze down into a heavy tree line and over the-

“What the fuck is that?” Y/n pointed at a rounded protrusion from the right side of the building towards a dome of glass panels where the outdoor pool used to rest. 

“What? The pool?”  He slowed the car to a stop so she could get a better look at it. “They built a greenhouse dome around the outside portion of it to extend its year round use. It’s really nice inside. Next shift I work at the pool, I'll come grab you and you can keep me company while I keep an eye out for drowning children.”  After she had a few moments to take in the new addition, he put the car into motion, snaking his way through the roundabout and stopping at the base of the stone steps. 

“Here we are!” He sang unbuckling both of their seatbelts. He hopped out of his seat the instant he put the car in park, and shut the door behind him without sparing her a glance. She heard the trunk open, and the shake of the car that made her sway in her seat as he pulled her stuff out of the trunk. In any other circumstance, she’d think he was trying to be annoying, a classic move on his part of avoiding her gaze and leaving her in the dust to see who could make it to the front doors first. But this time she could tell he was giving her space to take it in, and for that she was grateful.

She took a deep breath and gripped the door handle with three fingers. She watched through the window as Hoseok started carrying her bags up the stairs at aleisurelye pace, taking his own time in order to give her more. She felt the handle give under her hands, and the rush of chilly early spring air brushed against her skin, and the symphony of bugs and the sound of the tree branches dancing in the breeze met her ears.

The hair on her limbs stood up in succession, sending chills across her entire form. One of her feet met the ground, and the crunch of gravel felt so loud in her ears. It rattled her bones and made every muscle coil up, like an animal preparing to run from danger. She stood, putting both feet on the ground, an intense feeling getting stronger the closer she got to the stairs. Her heart thrummed in time with each one of her steps, and her ears began to ring. Hoseok had already made it to the doors, and was conversing with a luggage boy. Why did he feel so far away all of the sudden? The air suddenly felt as though it was closing in on her with each pace and the ringing in her ears was so loud, she thought they might bleed.

The bottom of her shoes met the first stone step with a thud, and suddenly all was quiet. She froze, unable to move any further. No more bugs, no sway of the tree branches in the wind. The ringing in her ears had ceased. Only the sound of her breathing and her heartbeat remained, which felt so small in comparison to this open ended silence. She couldn’t even hear Hoseok’s distant voice talking to the men standing at the doors; it was like they weren’t even there anymore. Glancing up, she found that they were in fact no longer there.

The space they had occupied showed no sign of life. The doors were still open, yet no light emitted from the windows or the threshold. She was alone. The door was still open, but was now occupied by a pulsing darkness that felt both overwhelmingly alive yet utterly empty.  The silence became suffocating.

The dark blue of the spring night sky no longer felt peaceful-it felt dangerous. It was as though she had a thousand eyes on her from all directions, waiting with baited breath for her to fall right into their hungry, gaping mouths. From her right side, a cloud of cold air curled around her leg and weaved itself between her palm and fingers, coiling itself tighter around them like it was holding onto her and keeping her from turning back. The gravel road gave way with a crunch behind her, and then she heard it. A whisper so quiet it almost blended into the chill breeze. 

“Welcome home.”

Suddenly the world snapped back into motion, nearly knocking her off her feet with its force. The bugs resumed their song, and the trees their swaying dance. Her chest was rising rapidly as her eyes searched frantically at the warmly lit windows, and the once dark and empty door now bursting with a warm inviting glow. In front of it her eyes landed on where Hoseok stood, giving directions to the luggage boy as he handed them her bags. Suddenly wanting nothing more than to be near him and the inviting light of the lobby, she sped up the stairs as fast as her legs could take her. 

“-private estate. You can put them on the second-floor landing. Thank you.” 

By the time she reached him, her heart was beating out of her chest and she had begun to sweat-from nerves or the speed at which she pushed herself up the stairs she couldn’t tell.

He turned his head to speak to her and did a double take. 

“Woah- what happened to you? You look like you might be sick.” His hand gently brushed his hand across her forehead to check her temperature, and his other hand held her forearm to steady her. She was sure it must’ve come back damp but he didn’t comment on it, instead choosing to remain quiet with his mouth twisted in contemplation. His eyes flickered over her shoulder down to the car, and paused there for a moment before meeting hers. Abruptly, he turned and stepped through the front doors of the lobby. 

The high white stone and gold ceiling outlined in ornate crown molding, brightly lit with a large chandelier hanging proud over the lobby seating was as grand as she remembered. Hoseok didn’t give her time to marvel over it, his shoes clacking loudly on the polished floor as he beelined for the check in desk located against the back wall, passing all of the seating and the barreled ceiling hallway to her left that led to the theater hall below them. The large wooden board behind the man behind the counter’s wide frame was dotted with golden keys hanging from their large metal rings- “it keeps the charm!” her father had insisted when they talked about changing to key cards. She watches the man behind the desk reach one and swipe the one hanging under the number 203, handing it to the family he was checking in. Her eyes’s mesmerized by the way the rest of the keys glittered in the yellow glow of the extravagant light fixtures mounted next to it. 

Her father let her sit in during their meeting with staff and other executives during the discussion about what updates they’d like to see in the next 10 years. She had taken the opportunity very seriously- her favorite Clifford the Big Red Dog pencil with a frog shaped eraser gripped purposefully in her small hands, scribbling down notes she deemed worthy in a batman themed notebook. The moment Mr. Jeon had suggested a keycard system, and the room was divided between moving with modern technology, or keeping the surviving key system they’d had since the first guest stayed in the hotel. She remembered the way her father, after sitting with his brows creased deep in thought, turned his gaze to her and grinned. “What does the future inheritor of the Wörner estate say?” 

“I can help the next person.” Seokjin’s clear tone brought her into the present, jolting her heart that had just barely managed to calm itself from whatever happened outside. 

His warm brown almond shaped eyes and friendly smile made her heart feel warm with nostalgia-giving her a much needed distraction. He gave her a once over and his face immediately fell into a look of irritation as he turned to Hoseok, who sauntered up to the edge of the desk. 

“Checking in a Ms. Wörn-”

“What did you do to her? I sent you because I thought you’d be a good fit to make her feel comfortable, not to torture her!” He reached his hand up and gently smacked Hoseok upside the head. 

“Hey!” 

“Hey what? I knew I should’ve sent Namjoon instead.” He turned to his left, muttering something along the lines of sending a clown to do the lord's work as he rummaged through what looked like a mini fridge tucked under the desk. 

“Ugh Jin, pull it together.” He reached over the counter to poke Seokjin’s puffed out cheeks, and the latter immediately brought his hands up to swat him away. “And anyways, I’d give Namjoon five seconds into Philly before he would’ve gotten into an accident. He doesn’t know how to drive in cities.” 

Seokjin stood back up, nudging the mini fridge door closed with his hip, a can of water in his hands and scowl on his face directed at Hoseok’s cheeky grin. Turning his attention back to y/n his face did a complete 180, lighting up in a friendly smile again. He held the aluminum can out for her to grab, and she reached for it with grateful shaky hands, cracking the top open to take a large swig of the cool liquid. 

“Sorry about him Ms. Wörner, you know how he can get.” 

“Please, call me Y/n-don't be a complete stranger.”  and “I didn’t do anything to her!” were spoken over one another.

“Oh yeah? What happened then? Did some other fool talk her ear off for 3 hours?” 

Y/n couldn’t stop herself from nearly choking on her water as she fought back a laugh at the two. The combination of their familiar banter and the refreshing water pulling her back into a more relaxed state. 

“No.” Hoseok plucked a piece of invisible lint from Seokjin’s red jacket. “She tripped.”  Seokjin slapped his hands away again, before eyeing him suspiciously. 

“She tripped?” He straightened his coat off instinctually after he pried Hoseok’s fingers from fiddling with it.

“Yes. She tripped.” 

They seemed to engage in some sort of silent conversation, their eyes following each other as they flickered back and forth to her and the front door behind her. Seokjin relented with a sigh, and turned to Y/n his smile on his lips yet again.

“Well, I’m sorry to hear about that. Be sure to watch your step in the future, we don’t need anything happening to you during your first time back.” He turned to his computer screen for a moment, before moving around to exit the lobby desk.  “Let me show you to your room.”

“I can handle that-” Hoseoks smug smile was wiped off his face by a stern glare from Seokjin. He raised his hands up and surrendered the lead to Seokjin.

 He led the three of them up one of the dual staircases that led to the second half of the lobby ecasing both sides of the front desk, each step feeling more familiar than the last. Once at the top, she saw the convenience store and gift shop to her right, and next to that their small cafe-The Edelweis-with its white floral logo lit up but the seats mostly empty. To her left was a barrelled ceiling hall identical to the one on the level below them, only this one had restrooms lining the left side wall, and a wide red carpeted hallway that led to the right and straight to the Adelaide. She could faintly hear the smooth floating trumpet of a Kitty Kallen song serenading its patrons, and the aroma of the extravagant and diverse menu making her stomach grumble in interest. She’d be sure to stop in tonight if she had time, her mouth practically watering at the thought of freshly made pasta, birria-inspired pot roast, and rustic French bread with their signature gochujang, honey, and herb butter. A melting pot of a restaurant that stands as a physical embodiment of all the different people whose hands helped maintain the hotel to what it is today. 

Seokjin had his hands clasped comfortably behind him as he walking, keeping his back straight. Y/n took this time to inspect his new look: His dark hair not too short but not too long, kept neat and out of his eyes under his cap. His shoulders had widened, and his jaw grew into that which made his face look older and more mature- the last of his boyishness gone in everything except the jovial glow in his eyes. The three of them traversed in silence. Well-what was silence until Hoseok got fidgety. 

“I can’t wait for you to see the estate’s new look. They updated the color so it’s no longer the old dingey red that's in the main hotel. It practically looks like a new building.” 

Seokjin gave a weary look between the two of them, but didn’t comment. He just continued to lead them down one of the side halls on either side of the main elevator, and out into the open square courtyard that the two arms of the back of the hotel wrapped around. Y/n nearly tripped over her own feet to keep pace with how fast he seemed to walk across the cobblestone. Weaving expertly around the small flower garden and seating area where a few guests were lounging about, enjoying the gentle babble of the water fountain. He nodded politely to them and tipped his hat, which they returned.  With swift steps they made it out of the courtyard and up the gravel path to the Estate house. Stopping at the navy blue and gold embellished doors, he pulled out a key from his pocket and slid it in the keyhole. If Y/n didn’t know any better, he seemed to be on edge- stuck in a conundrum of being in a rush yet somehow also reluctant to open the door. But as for why she couldn’t quite piece together. 

The doors swung open and her breath caught in her throat. She had found her answer.

What used to be the old dated, red wallpaper, was now a soft sky blue- brightening up the white molding and making the golden details shine. The wooden floors had been repolished, and a dark blue antique patterned rug ran through the main hall and disappeared into the rest of the downstairs. Everything was fresh, bright, rich, and confronting. Just like she had drawn out when she was a teenager. 

The thought made her both swell with pride, and awakened a dormant rage. Forcing those feelings away she followed their steps, past the large dining room to her left and the study to her right. With each doorway she passed, she could see snippets of the new designs-her designs-sticking to the blue tones and gold embellishments. A nod to the Wörner heritage, and to the tea set brought to the United States by Namjoon’s and Seokjin’s fourth great grandfather that had a permanent home in their dining room display cabinet. Its grayish blue accented cups and saucers are a symbol of the symbiotic relationship between the two families that had been going strong for nearly a century.

Making their way up the grand staircase to the landing, she saw her bags resting on one of two navy plush armchairs. The elegant blue from below continued up throughout the landing and down both halls on either side of her, perfectly complementing the oil-painted mural of wispy clouds and classically painted figures draped across the landing’s ceiling. 

“So, what do you think? Nice right?” Hoseok did a small whistle and a turn. “Makes it feel so much brighter and less like The Haunted Mansion with all of those deep moody reds.”

Seokjin stood quietly, his head slightly down and his neck flushed. He probably knew that this had been her idea. Her design. With his parents being so involved in the affairs of the hotel and estate, they would know everything, and subsequently so would he. Hoseok remained oblivious to the awkward energy in the room, so Y/n plastered a smile on her face in order to save everyone from the lingering discomfort. 

“It really does. Just makes it more inviting.” She managed to get the words out without sounding too forced, a feat she had to pat herself on the back for. Tearing her eyes away from the walls to look at the two of them, she could practically feel Seokjin’s shoulder’s relax as he bounced to pick up her bags with two hands. 

“Your room has remained mostly untouched at your parent’s request. I’m sure you can change that though if you wanted to.”  Seokjin smiled. Y/n realized as she watched him stand still, that he was probably waiting for her to lead the way to her room. Muscle memory led her there-down the hall on the right-hand side of the split landing to follow the bend to the left all the way to the back corner room.

She could hear their soft footsteps behind her, so she knew she didn’t have time to freeze up now. Gripping the bronze worn doorknob with vigor, she pushed open the door with a bit more force than she had meant to, causing the door to bounce off the door stopper before coming to a slow stop at an angle.

“Geez, what’d that door do to you?” Hoseok remarked, earning a stiff elbow in the ribs from Seokjin.

Ignoring the two of them, she stepped into her old room. It was exactly as she remembered it. The golden bed frame wound with battery operated lights from her highschool years, her comforter a natural forest green, complemented by an array of burnt orange and white leaf patterned pillows. The walls a sage green botanical wallpaper, peppered with photos from her childhood and highschool. Kicking a flipped corner of her patterned woven rug out, she took a slow lap around the room, stopping to run her hands over the calendar, 4 years out of date, still open to December. On the 25th box were a few doodles of trees and cookies she had done in a tipsy haze the night of Christmas eve. Seokjin cleared his throat, startling her. 

“Where would you like me to set these?” 

“Oh! You can just toss those on the bed. Thanks.” she gestured absent mildly in the direction of the bed. 

He did as he was told, while Hoseok just leaned against the doorframe, glancing around the room seemingly lost in thought. 

“Dinner in the estate is still served at 7:30, so you have a bit of time to get settled if you’d like to join us. You don’t have to eat here, you can always go to the Adelaide or wherever you’d like. But I’m sure your parents are looking forward to seeing you tonight.” Seokjin bowed gently, and began to retreat. Without thinking, Y/n walked over and put a hand on his arm. 

“Thanks, Jin. I really appreciate everything today. I missed you all.” Y/n met his eyes, hoping to convey her sincerity. 

“No problem Ms. Wör-”

Y/n cut him off with a playful groan. “ Enough of that- you’re still my friend, no need for fancy titles or anything like that.” 

His ears twinged pink as he gave her a shy nod and smile. The customer service persona was gone, and  in front of her stood the sweet and quiet Seokjin she remembered as a kid. 

“Great! I’ll see you at dinner then. 7:30?” 

He fixed his coat again, and the confident persona took over once again. 

“Of course you’ll see me there. You know me, always on time.” He gave her a small salute and passed Hoseok (who had been silently watching the exchange) giving him a curt nod as he left the room. Hoseok watched him go until he was out of sight, and turned back to face Y/n. 

“You doing okay with all of this?” He asked, gesturing to her with his chin.

“Yeah I am. I should probably wash the bedding though, don’t you think? Four years of sitting in a dusty room probably has them feeling pretty stale.” Y/n laughed dismissively. She unzipped her bag and began to pull stuff out onto the stiff comforter. 

“I didn’t just mean your room, but that’s good to hear. I can let the laundry service know for you on the way out.” She met his gaze again for a good long minute-waiting for him to crack a joke of some kind- but he didn’t. 

“Oh.” She paused, trying to wrack her brain for a good response. How was she doing with all this? Honestly she couldn’t tell, her day had been a complete whirlwind so far. It was like something had drawn the curtains on her anxiety and emotions so she couldn’t feel them at the moment. If she really thought about it, she couldn’t put her finger on why she had been so nervous in the first place. Right now, she felt good in the estate-like she was supposed to be here. “I’m really not sure. I feel fine, I think…” She trailed off with a shrug. 

He hummed in agreement, but he didn’t seem to buy it. 

“Well if you need anything, I’m down the hall on the left side of the landing now.”

“Awww. We aren’t neighbors anymore?” 

His smile came back again, and he laughed. “Oh don’t you wish.” He pushed himself up from the door frame and stretched his arms above his head until she heard something pop. “But fortunately for you, I’m Jungkook’s problem now.” 

“Shucks, what am I ever going to do with all this peace and quiet.” Y/n snapped her fingers in feigned disappointment. 

“Oh I don’t know about that, your new neighbor is a night owl so I’ve heard.” He began to saunter back out of the room with a teasing smile. 

“Oh yeah? And who is that?” She stuck her head out of her doorway to peer at him as he made his way down the hall. 

“Yoongi. He insisted on moving to this hall when he came back so I traded with him.” 

_________________________________________

Hoseok was true to his word, the cleaning service showing up not 10 minutes after he had made his leave. Once she had thanked them profusely and handed them her linens, she made sure to waste all the time she could by puttering about her room and giving it a gentle face lift, doing anything to keep her mind occupied and away from both her parents and whatever the fuck she had experienced out front. Removing the outdated calendar was first, then putting away all her belongings in color order (multiple times), before tucking her bags beneath the bed-which is where she was in the process of doing now- seated on the floor with her bags folded over her knees, and head tilted in confusion. She had lifted the bed skirt up to shove the bags under there to be forgotten indefinitely, when something being in her way stopped her in her tracks.

There, centered under her bed, was a small wooden box that was sure she hadn’t left in that spot. It was her old childhood jewelry box, one of which she purposefully avoided taking with her. With trembling hands, she pulled it out and unlatched the lid.

Laying inside the velvet lined side right where she had left them, were all of the pictures she owned that had anything to do with her younger sister. She picked up the first one and held it up to look at it more closely, even though she knew that she shouldn’t.

Three girls, close in age and wearing a set of matching dresses only differing in color, were lined up on the front porch of the hotel, the front lawn behind them was flourishing with flora and littered with toys. The photographer-she thinks it had been Mrs. Jung- had to have been standing in the open doors of the lobby when it was taken. Posing obediently on the right-hand side was Amelia, the eldest, wearing a large toothy grin and one arm tossed awkwardly over Y/n’s bent form. The 4-year-old Y/n in the photo had her arms wound tightly around the youngest in the photo, Matilda. Matilda’s small hands were clasped around a stuffed horse, and she was sporting the signature awkward and messy grin of a nearly 3-year-old toddler.

Y/n felt her throat tighten as she held up the next photo: the one of Matilda’s last Christmas. No one in the photo had known that at the time of course-so the photo did not reflect the mood it now elicited from most onlookers.

It was teeming with the unbridled joy of over a dozen children posed in front of that year’s lavishly decorated tree, all of them buzzing with impatience to open the overflowing pile of presents spilling into the bottom edge of the photo. She could recognize the faces of a few of both her own distant cousins that had joined in the festivities that year speckled in between her sisters, and the boys who lived in the house, and Hoseok's sister. She spied Hoseok's wild boyish grin standing next to herself, his eyes looking sideways instead of at the camera. Jimin was posed sweetly, sitting sandwiched in the front on the floor between young Jungkook and a boy she didn’t really recognize. One of Jin and Namjoon’s cousin’s who had come to visit for the holidays on occasion? Or perhaps Taehyung, the boy Hoseok mentioned earlier... She wasn’t entirely sure.

Her eyes slid to the Kim boys standing politely off to the right with Amelia. She only just caught Yoongi’s head poking up over Namjoon's shoulder, a small forced smile on his face the most he was able to do for a photo he had adamently detested being in.

Y/n traced Matilda’s small face with the tip of her finger, her arms spread out above her head as she mimicked the star on top of the tree. Clearing her throat of the ball that had formed there, she shoved both photos back in the box, her eyes just catching the photo of a newborn Matilda draped across her own small lap before she shut the lid and slid the clasp back in place.

She only had a few minutes before she had to make an appearance at dinner, and she wasn’t about to go in looking like a blubbering mess.

Shaking her shoulders out and pinching her cheeks, she shoved her folded bags beneath her bed and rose to her feet with the box in hand. Walking over to the large closet, she opened the door and popped the box on the top shelf, promptly shutting the door on both it and the feelings it had dug up. Closing her eyes, she took a few deep breaths before walking into the small ensuite bathroom to freshen her hair and splash cool water on her face. Looking at her own reflection, she tried to give herself a pep talk. 

“It’s just dinner. You can do this. If all else fails, just eat in silence and leave early-but you have to go.” She moved to leave the room but paused, giving heself a stern pointed finger through the reflection. "And keep it together tonight. No matter what happens, don't flip the table."

Giving herself one more affirming nod, she stood up straight and left her bathroom. She grabbed her phone from where she had discarded it on the bare mattress and tucked it into her pocket while she slipped from her room.

Her path was illuminated by golden wall sconces, making it easy to retrace the steps she had taken earlier- not like she couldn’t walk through these halls blind folded if she had to. The distant chatter emitting from the dining room grew louder with each step, causing a nervous burn to bubble up into her throat at the impending reunion.

Stepping quietly up to the archway, she lingered outside the propped doors and peeking around the frame. Her parents weren’t in their seats yet, which made her release a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding at the brief respite the universe had given her. 

The table was donned in a clean blue tablecloth and gold embellished napkins and plates, a glass of chilled white wine at each seat. Hoseok was seated on the opposite side of the table from the door, his glass pinched between a few fingers and leaning heavily onto Namjoon’s shoulder, laughing at something on his phone. Namjoon was also smiling, his dimples on display for all to see. He looked about the same as she remembered- cropped brown hair still damp from a shower, strong yet soft face, and taller than the rest of them. The only thing that seemed different was that his shoulders had almost doubled in width, probably from lugging around wheelbarrows and sacks of soil and compost all day.

To his left was who she had to assume was Jungkook, judging by his rounded eyes and nose. He had her doing a double-take: His hair was much longer than he had kept it when they were younger, and fell in waves down to his cheeks and down the back of his neck. He had also seemingly bulked up like Namjoon, and grown another 3 inches in height since they had last spoken.

The remaining seats were empty. No sight of the Seokjin or the rest of them anywhere. 

Hoseok must’ve felt her nerves leaching from her form, as his eyes suddenly met hers from across the room causing his eyes to light up and a sly smile to break across his face. 

“Oh Y/N! Come sit near me.” He flailed his hand wildly, attempting to beckon her over to join in on the fun. 

Namjoon’s eyes shot up from his phone to connect with hers, and he put his phone into his pocket and came to a clumsy stand. 

“Y/N.” His dimpled smile was overtaken by shock, as he came around the table to pull her into one of his signature bear hugs. 

“H-hey.” Her response was muffled by his sweater as he crushed her to his chest. She could hear Hoseok giggling at her awkwardness and it made her cheeks flush with embarrassment. 

Namjoon released her from the hug and ruffled her hair affectionately. “It’s good to see you again. I didn’t know you were coming back.” 

Y/n laughed uncomfortably and fiddled with the edge of her sweater. “I mean, technically I didn’t either until this morning.” 

He gave her a quizzical look but seemed to go with not asking any questions for now, instead moving to the side so she could wave in Jungkook’s direction. 

“Hi, Jungkook.” 

His eyes gave her a once over before flickering down to play with the frayed edges of his placemat. “Hi.” 

“Oh Jungkook, don’t be shy! She’s just as weird and annoying as she always was.” Hoseok chirped from his seat. 

Y/n let out a defiant sound. “I am not! You said yourself earlier today that I could never be annoying.” 

Jungkook's eyes flickered between the two of them, and let a small smile grace his features. 

“Who, me? I’d never say something so preposterous.” Hoseok held a hand to his chest in mock offense. 

“Preposterous? That’s a big word for you.” Namjoon chimed in, scoffing while he plopped into his seat with a humored scrunch of his face. 

Y/n laughed at Hoseoks sputtered defense, the way they fell back into a comfortable banter eased the ice settling over her skin at the impending arrival of her parents and reminded her of the things she had missed from home and hadn't let herself dwell on for years.

She took a seat across from Namjoon, and slid her chair into place even if it made Hoseok send her a pout at her act of betrayal for not sitting with him. She felt content listening to Namjoon and Hoseok jesting with each other, and let her eyes wander through the royal blue and gold dining room to examine every inch of detail in the room. It filled her with pride to see what she had envisioned come to life, even if she was still mulling over the details of how it came to be. During their journey around the room, her eyes found Jungkook’s, who had been stealing sideways glances at her from his seat since she’d sat down. He quickly averted his eyes, pretending he had been looking at something over her shoulder instead. Or at least, she had thought he was pretending. 

“Do you like the updated design? I’m a bit bummed that I missed getting to show you myself.” Her mother’s voice sounded from behind her. 

She whirled sharply to take her in-and it made her heart squeeze. People don’t talk about the hard parts of not talking to a family member. Everyone likes to talk about the part where they don’t miss them anymore, or when they couldn’t care less about a triumphant praise of their past self's decision making. But they don’t talk about the years you miss out on or the collateral damage of losing connections with those in shared circles- her mother's face carrying just a couple of new wrinkles that weren’t as prominent before a a glaring piece of evidence to the years missed between them. Four years of laughter that etched her laugh lines deeper into her cheeks, or smiles that left permanent crinkles in her eyes that she didn’t get to see. 

Y/n clambered to her feet, and she felt her mother’s eyes following her every movement. 

“I do. They look just as lovely as I’d have imagined.” Y/n managed to force the syllables off her tongue in what she assumed sounded genuine, but she couldn’t tell if her mother saw right through her or not like she used to. 

“I’m glad.” She tilted her head to gaze around the room. “Your father spared no expense to match it to your descriptions as best he could.” She took a tentative step closer, and that’s when Y/n recognized something she didn’t expect: Her mother, Mariah Wörner-one of the most confident, intelligent and strongest women she had ever known-was just as nervous as she was. The way her fingers held onto her own elbows from where her forearms crossed in front of her like a lifeline gave it away. She had expected her to be angry. Hysterical. Enraged. Disappointed. Or even some combination of any of those to take hold of her and spit out insults in fiery waves into her skin or stare daggers into her spine. But instead, her mothers eyes were shaky and uncertain. Scared.

Y/n didn’t know how to answer her, and floundered for a moment in the sudden silence that enveloped the room. The men seemingly distracted by their own devices, trying hard to not look like they were paying attention.

“Your father is cooking tonight, he insisted that he make something for you on your first night back.” Her mother floated over to her usual seat towards the end of the table, and nervously shuffled into her seat. 

“Oh that’s-” Y/n tried to reign in the sudden strong urge to cry, “That’s nice.” She melted back into her seat, feeling like her soul was floating outside of her body. 

“Roland is at a friend's house until Monday. After this spring, we are looking at enrolling him in the same middle school you went to in Hershey.  As such, he’s trying to soak up all the time he can with his friends.” Her mother let out a melodious laugh. “And you know me, I can’t ever say no to you guys.” 

Her sentence hung heavily on Y/n’s consciousness. You didn’t have a problem with that the last time we spoke, Y/n thought to herself bitterly, but she held her tongue to keep it from slipping out.

Her mother occupied herself with unfolding her napkin and resting it on her lap. The silence lingered, the only sounds being the rustle of fabric as people shifted uncomfortably in their seat. 

Y/n wanted nothing more than to both ask a million questions and reignite the argument where it left off, or to run into her mother’s arms and apologize for not giving them another chance to explain themselves. Her conflicting emotions felt overwhelming, feeding into her dissociation. 

Her father burst through the doors separating the dining room from the kitchen, a handful of hot pads stacked in his hands. He looked tired, his brow furrowed as he scanned the room. He stopped looking around when he met Y/n’s eyes, and she saw his own harden in determination.

Here it comes. She thought to herself, bracing herself for him to start reprimanding her. He began to make his way towards her, tossing the hot pads on the table leaving Namjoon to frantically try to catch them before they slid into his chest. 

Y/n began to stand up to greet him, but barely made it six inches off of her seat before her father wrapped his arms tightly around her shoulders. He smelt of butter, garlic, and spices as he held her tightly to his chest- it’s as if he thought the moment he let go she would run.

It took her a moment to realize that he was hugging her, not holding her hostage. Y/n let her arms robotically wind their way loosely around her father's back, not fully conscious of her own movements. For a moment she wondered if she had fallen asleep upstairs and that this was all a dream, or if she had actually tripped out front and hit her head. He surely should be yelling at her by now. After a few seconds of silence he let go of her, and gripped her shoulders tightly in his hands. 

“Dad- what’s-”

“I don’t care.” His voice was warm and firm. 

“I don’t understand what you mean?” Y/ns hands grabbed at her father's to try and remove them. She began to feel self-conscious of the way everyone was looking at this open display of vulnerability. She tried to take his hands off of her shoulders to stop herself from crying at the closeness that she had missed. 

“All of this-” He gestured a finger wildly between Y/n, her mother, and himself, “-I don’t care about that right now. I missed you. Let’s move that aside for tonight and just enjoy dinner, yeah?” 

She felt her eyes burning, and swallowed to keep herself in check. She nodded. 

Her father broke into a giddy smile, and he released her. “Toll!” He spun around and quickly made his way through the swinging door, disappearing with a faint “Wunderbar!”.  Only for his head to pop out again not more than a second later, a stack of cork hot pads in his hands that he tossed onto the table with a flying arc. “Can you guys spread those out? I’m going to bring everything out here.”  With that, his head disappeared into the kitchen again.

 Namjoon began to pass the hot pads around and Jungkook stood up to help him evenly distribute them. Not thirty seconds had passed before her dad came back out-a large tray of German potato dumplings, Kartoffelklöße, and placed them in the center. He winked at her and walked briskly back to the kitchen to carry out an array of what Y/n recognized as some of her old favorites.

Crispy roasted brussel sprouts, honey garlic carrots, buttered corn, and pan seared chicken to go with the dumplings. When he placed the last tray, he sat at the head of the table closest to the kitchen, practically glowing with pride at the feast he had prepared. Her dad didn’t waste his time beginning to fill up his own plate, stacking dumplings and chicken on top of each ether with haste. He looked up at her when he noticed she wasn’t moving. 

“Bitte, iss!” He gestured exuberantly to the display, and picked up his fork to shovel the first bite in. 

The rest of the table began to help themselves, and Y/n followed suit. A more comfortable silence fell over the table now that everyone had distracted themselves with curating their own plates. They had made it into a few minutes of clanking silverware and the occasional clear of someone's throat without so much as a word. But Y/n didn't mind-it gave her plenty of time to dissociate even further from the reality she had naively thrown herself into.

“Will Jin be joining us?” Her mother broke the silence, glancing from her plate to Hoseok as she pushed a carrot around her plate. 

Hoseok looked up from cutting his chicken, the shake of the table cloth near his bouncing leg being the only sign of nerves he let himself show. 

“He was supposed to be, but Jimin roped him into dinner at the Adelaide. He has been trying to find someone to sit with him tonight so he’s not by himself, and after being turned down by Yoongi for the dozenth time he moved onto his next victim.” He shoveled another bite into his mouth quickly, hoping to avoid being the only one speaking.

“What about the others?” Y/n didn’t realize it was her own voice until she felt her mother’s gaze on the side of her face. 

“Last I heard Yoongi was called for an urgent maintenance call about an hour ago, so who knows when he’ll be back.” He shrugged, and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “His parent’s have been back in Korea since the Lunar New Year. They’ve only been coming back for maybe 6 months of the year-if that. One of his cousins had twins last year so, more of a reason to keep visiting.” He paused to take a sip from his glass of his wine. “My folks are down at the Adelaide. They usually eat there for dinner anymore, or they drive to my sister’s place. Something about finally getting to enjoy the environment and not having to be the environment.” 

Y/n nodded, trying to stay engaged with anything other than her confused state of mind at the moment. This is not how she expected her first interaction with her parents to go. 

“My aunt and unc-Jin’s parents-Have been traveling mostly.” Namjoon piped in letting Hoseok have a break, reaching over to grab another dumpling. “They all but retired this past January, and have been trying to make the most of it together. Though they haven't officialy gone through the process to finalize it, and I personally think they are hanging on until this year is over. Mr. Jeon has been off teaching a semester or two up at MIT. He has been trying to convince the architecture professor to bring some students down here to come visit the hotel and estate-he likes to bounce ideas off of fresh minds.” 

Y/n hummed in response, turning her attention to the flavors bouncing off of her tongue. She took a risk and snuck glances at both parents. They were exchanging their own private looks; her mother’s was worried, and her father’s was nothing short of elated. Her father’s hand rested gently atop her mother’s, his thumb drawing soothing circles onto he skin. She caught her father’s gaze and he grinned, his eyes crinkling just like she used to remember, if not even brighter. 

She took another bite of corn to keep herself from crying.

_________________________________________

The rest of dinner was surprisingly uneventful. Her father had been true to his word, and avoided making dinner awkward, while also not acting like he was forcing positivity down everyone’s throats. His laughter was loud and genuine, and he always left discussion open for Y/n to contribute if she wanted to, and didn’t bat an eye if she didn’t. He was, in every sense of the word, beaming. It was as if the idea of her just being at the table with him again made his day. And that realization is what led her to where she is now - huddled damp in her towel on her freshly washed and made bed, sniffling away the last of her emotional breakdown in the shower. They had missed her. They had wanted her here. And she chose not to come back. A new wave of fresh tears built up in her eyes before she could stop them again, as her spiral started its cycle all over again.

Guilt. Hope. Anger. Calm. Over and over again.

She left because of them-what they had done was unforgivable in her eyes. But here they were, wanting to sew back together a rip they made. Should she not give them the chance? 

Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock so soft on her door that she just brushed it off as the house settling itself. She refused to let herself linger on anything that might make her heart race, trying to keep her feet planted in reality-One paranormal experience was more than enough for her today.

It did light a fire under her to move, taking it as her sign to pull herself together by tossing on an oversized t-shirt and sleep shorts so she could curl up under the covers for the rest of the night and ignore everything in favor of sleep. Stopping by the cracked closet door to give it a gentle shove closed, and finished the last steps over to her bed.  But just as she was pulling the comforter's edges down, she heard the knock again, cementing the sound as definitely not the house settling. Padding softly over to the door, she opened it just a crack to see who was interrupting her self-pitying time. 

Her mother was standing there, shifting from one foot to the other. Her hair was pulled up and away like she had always done before bed, like she had intended to do the same thing as Y/n before she had found herself outside of her door. 

“Are you…alright?” Y/n opened the door a bit more to get a better look at her. Her eyes were rimmed red, her face was weary and sagged from fatigue. They really must’ve had the same plans. 

“May I come in?” Her mother’s eyes swung from left to right, checking over her shoulder for anyone that may be listening in. Y/n wordlessly moved the side and opened the door just wide enough to let her slip through. Her mother quickly turned to shut the door behind herself, and slid the lock into place. Once she heard the click of the door close, she let out a breath of relief before turning to face Y/n. 

“We need to talk.” Her mother folded her arms over herself. 

Y/n snorted. “Understatement of the century.” 

“I’m being serious, Y/n.” This is truly the most nervous she had ever seen her mother, causing Y/N to reign herself in again with a sigh.

“Look mom, I’m really tired right now. I just want to go to bed. Can we talk about this another time?” Y/n tried to keep her tone even. She was just getting out of the angry phase of her cycle, she didn’t need it reignited. 

“No, we have to discuss it now. It’s crucial.” 

Y/n sighed and plopped onto the foot of her bed with a huff. She looked up at mother expectantly, waving her hand for her to continue. “Well, say what you need to say then.” 

Her mother pinched her nose between her fingers. “Y/n, I didn't come here to fight. I came here to….” Her mother paused, choosing her next words carefully.  “I came here to give you some advice.” 

“Advice?” Y/n's eyebrow rose in disbelief. 

“Yes.” Her mother pulled her silk robe closer around her form. 

“And this couldn’t wait for tomorrow because…?” 

Y/n watched as she exhaled sharply through her nose, a telltale sign that she was growing impatient. “I’m sure that you’ve missed all of your friends -and rightfully so- but it’d be in your best interest that you keep some distance between a select few of them.”  

Y/n recoiled at her mother’s words, her own coming out before she could stop them. “Excuse me? And who would the ‘select few of them’ be?” 

Her mother’s eyes met Y/n’s with authority, and her response was short and stern. “Yoongi.” 

“Are you serious?” Y/n gaped at her in disbelief.

“Jungkook too.” 

“I can’t believe you’re being serious right now.” Y/n shook her head, her rage beginning to bubble to the surface. 

“Y/n please listen to me-” 

“Oh yes, please! Share with the class just as to why I can’t talk to my friends.” Y/n gestured to the empty room . 

“I…” Her mother’s face fell, as did her voice. “I can’t.” 

Y/n could’ve heard a pin drop from the front door it was so silent. 

“Get out.” 

“Please, you have to just trust me-” Her mother began to plead with her. 

“No. I don’t have to do anything. You said you didn’t want to argue, yet here you are. Making decisions for everyone else and not bothering to give anyone else your reasoning.” 

“Y/n-”

“God, I was so stupid to think that maybe you had changed based off of one dinner. Nope. Now you're in my room, giving me orders and being secretive just like always.” Y/n’s voice began to rise in volume, and her mother took a cautious step towards the door. 

“That is not true. I care about you. I love you! I’m just trying to protect you,” Her mother tried to reach for her, but Y/n side-stepped out of her reach. 

“Protect me?! Protect me from what?” Y/n was so enraged, that her eyes began to water again much to her own embarrassment. 

Her mother stared into her eyes, opening and closing her mouth repeatedly. 

Y/n let out a dry laugh. “Let me guess, you can’t tell me.” 

“You wouldn’t understand-” 

“Bullshit. I would. You just don’t want to tell me.” Y/ns shoulders began to deflate. 

“That is not true.” Her mother pointed her finger at Y/n with venom. 

“Then tell me.” 

“Why can’t you just listen to me, why must you always make this so difficult.” Her mother threw her hands up into the air in exasperation. 

“ME? I’m the one being difficult?” 

“Yes!” Her mother hissed out from her clenched teeth. 

“You’re the one that sent the invitation to me!” 

“That was your father’s idea- I wanted to-” Her mother started but Y/n cut her off again.

“Oh so you don’t want me here then?”

Her mother’s eyes were alight with fury. “That is not what I said. If you’d let me finish-”

“No, actually I think I’ve heard enough. This is fucking ridicu-” 

“That is enough.” Mariah’s tone was cutting, and final. She stomped towards Y/n and gripped her upper arms in her long hands. “You will listen to me.” Y/n had never seen such rage in her mother’s eyes, not once. “Do not think that for one second turning you away all those years ago doesn’t haunt me, or that a single day went by where I didn’t think of you. You will do as I say, and you will not ask questions. I will not-” Her voice cracked, forcing her to pause. “I can not lose you again. I will not lose another child.” 

The way her mother’s eyes bore into her own, and the way her hands gripped onto Y/n's shoulders with such desperation knocked the air out of her lungs. She was still angry, yes, but she couldn’t find it in herself to yell at her mother-not when she looked so vulnerable and small in front of her. Two words she’d have never used to describe her mother. Her mother’s hands released themselves from her shoulders, and she walked herself with dragging feet towards the door and unlocked it with a trembling hand.

“I can’t tell you what to do, you’re right. But please at least try to listen to trust me, if not even just a little.” Her tired eyes looked at Y/n over her shoulder with so much defeat, that slowly morphed into one that was resolute. Distant and cold. “Keep your door locked at night. And if you think you hear your father walking around the house during the night…” Her mother paused within the threshold, debating her next words. “Don’t get out of bed, and don’t, under any circumstances, open the door.” 

_________________________________________

_________________________________________

Next Chapter

Toll- Great!

Wunderbar- Wonderful!

Bitte iss! -Please eat!

[knightofhylia-sageofthetriforce]

Hyrulean Force Cultivation

This is to be the beginning of my writings on basic Force Cultivation.

In The Minish Cap, we are first introduced to the concept of Force in the form of the Light Force as a power contained within Princess Zelda. In Phantom Hourglass, we learn of Life Force which is a sacred power within all living things. In the Japanese versions of the games, both are referred to simply as Force.

As has been said before, all living things contain Force. This Force powers our bodies, minds, and spirits. Some naturally contain more than others, some less. It is possible to cultivate this Force into greater vitality and power.

Force flows through our entire being and is centered in points within the internal subtle structure of the body called Force Gates. In these basic practices, we will focus on three primary gates.

Gate of Power: Located just below the navel

Gate of Courage: Located in the center of the chest near the heart.

Gate of Wisdom: Located in the area commonly known as the Third Eye.

These gates are heavily energized during the Embodying the Triforce technique and balanced. Once so Force is flowing through the body, it is important to bring it back down to the area of the Gate of Power in order to remain calm and rooted. This excess Force that has been brought into the navel can then be consolidated and stored. This will over time cultivate a container which will hold consolidated Force that can act as a battery to continue powering the body.

I like to call this container my Force Gem. Force Gems are introduced in Four Swords Adventures as crystallized Force that powers the Four Sword. The Sand of Hours in Phantom Hourglass is made of ground up Force Gems. They also appear in Spirit Tracks and empower those titular tracks.

This Force Gem you cultivate, rather than being pyramidal like in the games, will more likely be round like a ball. The process is begun by sitting in as upright a posture as the body can manage. Preferably with crossed legs on a cushion or the floor, but accommodations can be made for level of ability.

Begin by breathing through the nose deeply into the abdomen, allowing it to inflate. Exhale slowly through the nose, allowing the abdomen to deflate. Settle into yourself and find a comfortable rhythm. Raise the arms with the palms facing downward. The Force Gates in the hands serve to move and work Force like a guide. Start above the head. My favorite way to position my arms is like Rauru preparing to fire his light beam

As the arms are positioned above the head, breathe deeply. Allow the Force to sink from your head, down into your chest. Spend as long as five minutes in this position if you have the time.

Next, drop the hands to just above the chest. This will push the built up Force lower again towards the navel. Spend time in this position as well, breathing deeply.

Finally, drop one hand above the abdomen and one below, like you’re holding a ball. This will focus the Force into the abdomen where it can be consolidated.

During deep breaths, fill the abdomen with Force during inhalation. During exhalation when the abdomen is compressing, so is the Force. With every breath, fill the area of the Gate of Power seated in the center of your being with Force, then compress it with exhalation. Over time, this will begin to form the Force Gem that contains Force as abundant as the waters of Lake Hylia.

Expect this beginning step to take months or years. The Force Gem will form and grow over time until it overflows, increasing vitality and spiritual aptitude.

May the Goddess Smile Upon You

-Florian Knight

[thehollowprince]

A good Screenrant article? Color me surprised.

"Most viewers assume Qui-Gon was right to believe Anakin needed to be trained - but surprisingly, George Lucas seems to think it was a mistake.

"George Lucas believed Qui-Gon was wrong to decide to train Anakin Skywalker in Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace. Many viewers see Qui-Gon Jinn as the perfect Jedi, the embodiment of everything the Order was supposed to represent. He is a rebel against the Council, alone and uncorrupted, a champion of the underdog who recognizes Anakin Skywalker's potential. The reality, of course, is that Qui-Gon is a lot more nuanced; he's as flawed as any other Jedi, and in fact, George Lucas considered him even more flawed.

"Lucas expressed his own view in an interview with Cut Magazine in 1999 (via David Talks SW). In his view, Qui-Gon shares the same faults as Anakin; he is spontaneous and reckless, with Obi-Wan Kenobi providing him a sense of balance. What's more, Lucas surprisingly suggested Qui-Gon made a mistake in insisting the Jedi should train Anakin.

"I think it is obvious that he [Qui-Gon] was wrong in Episode I and made a dangerous decision, but ultimately, this decision may be correct. The 'phantom menace' refers to the force of the dark side of the universe. Anakin will be taken over by dark forces, which in turn destroy the balance of the Galaxy, but the individual who kills the Emperor is Darth Vader - also Anakin."

"It is certainly ironic that Lucas believes it "obvious" Qui-Gon shouldn't have trained Anakin. The modern consensus is that Qui-Gon was the one Jedi who could have saved Anakin, the only one who truly understood the prophecy of the Chosen One.

"The general view is that the Jedi Council was wrong to initially reject Anakin. Lucas takes a different view, though, suggesting Anakin's training was, in fact, the mistake that doomed the order. It's fascinating to imagine how the Star Wars saga would have played out if Anakin didn't join the Jedi; the most likely scenario is that he'd have been taken in by the people of Naboo as a hero, and no doubt he and Padmé would have gotten together anyway. Padmé wouldn't have held Anakin back when he began dreaming of his mother's death, so this Anakin would never have built up the fear of loss to the cataclysmic degree seen in Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith. Amazingly, this is probably the happiest path Anakin could have taken - and he was denied it because of Qui-Gon Jinn's choice.

Personal Note: I don't like the insinuation that the Jedi "held Anakin back" from pursuing his visions to save his mother because by his own admissions, they were just dreams. By the time he himself finally decided to do something about it, it was too late. But aside from that, I agree with everything else.

"It's significant that the will of the Force had Anakin brought up on Tatooine, a world outside the Republic, where he wouldn't be found by the Jedi. In his impetuousness, Qui-Gon insisted the Chosen One should be trained by the Jedi - but there's nothing to indicate the prophecy of the Chosen One suggested any such thing. Unsurprisingly, Lucas' perspective on the Star Wars saga is entirely convincing, even if it does run against the general view. Things worked out in the end, of course, but only after a whole lot of chaos on a galactic scale."

[lovehotelreservation]

Escort

Summary: There’s strength in numbers, but sometimes being alone is what you need most.

Rating: R

Pairing: F!Reader/Sonny

**Warning: contains themes of stalking, unhealthy/possessive behavior, & groping!**

lord free me from the australian

---------

The reassurance of another presence.

City life was an experience of being surrounded by a mass of people yet still managing to feel lonely regardless. Not clicking with colleagues at work, savoring what little personal space that a packed and busy subway allowed, the noise of neighboring families and roommates within the entirety of an apartment complex building–to be enveloped yet still experience isolation.

But there was balance, as you had come to experience while living alone in the city.

After clocking out for the day and saying your goodbyes to the friendly security guard, you could enjoy a latte with adorably crafted foam art by the ever jovial barista, Alban. During your daily commute on the subway, you were texting back and forth with Uki–a friend from college–on plans for an approaching hang out and the interpretation of a recent psychic reading. The noise that often plagued your apartment never bothered you much anyhow since you could always find refuge at the downtown library where the kind yet teasing archivist Fulgur could offer you new recommendations.

By this, you weren’t fully isolated from all human contact.

Yet it was during certain moments of loneliness that made you feel unnerved.

While parting ways with Alban as he closed up the cafe, it was the sensation of someone peering at you from the evening shadows.

As you texted Uki on the subway, it was the phantom touch of fingers creeping along your waist or the hem of your skirt that felt too targeted to simply be an accident or a random groper.

Wandering through the library was meant to be a leisurely adventure, yet as of late, you were instinctively hurrying your steps to Fulgur’s office, gripped by the thought of being followed.

Those were the moments when you craved to be alone, to be free of the fascination of those prying eyes, this obsessive presence.

You knew this building anxiety was soon going to drive you mad–this was no way to live after all.

And so, on a day when there was a downpour, the city swept with shadows and gloom, you blurted out a plea for company as you left work, your face flustered, your fingers digging into the strap of your bag.

By contrast to the moody gray clouds above, the friendly security guard of your company office was a needed ray of sunshine.

He pretty much embodied such radiance, with his bright blonde locks, the gentle look in his amethyst eyes, and the warm smile he showed as he nodded in response to your request.

Sonny Brisko was someone you could trust.

And what a blessing his presence served. He loomed so much taller above you and even out of his work uniform, he still looked so mighty and strong even in a cap, a white t-shirt and black jogger pants. Somehow, during this one trek back home, you felt peace at last from those creeping eyes, perverse fingers, and haunting presence.

The shining armor of your knight was a blue athleisure jacket and a black face mask and you couldn’t be more thankful.

Soon, your apartment complex was within sight at last. By now, night had completely swept over the city and with the stormy weather above, the light of the entrance lobby was blacked out as was the green light for the electronic passcode keypad.

A sign of a power outage.

It was a minor inconvenience, but one you could work around as you drew out your key to open the side door manually.

Your intention was to navigate your way up the stairway with the light of your phone on your lonesome.

Sonny’s hand reached for your wrist.

Gently, of course.

It was too dangerous to go alone, he remarked.

He did not mind escorting you further and the low dulcet timber of his voice was something you couldn’t resist.

You lived a few floors up, but he remarked how he was used to climbing a similar set flight of stairs.

All the while his hand rested along the small of your back as he ushered you through the darkness, the light of his phone and yours guiding your path.

He was close enough that you could feel the warmth of his body heat.

It was comforting at first, but as you got closer to your apartment, you couldn’t help but feel a chill that was slowly clawing its way into your body.

Something within your mind told you that loneliness was absolutely necessary as soon as possible.

Your front door was within reach soon enough.

You whipped out your key as quickly as you offered your thanks to Sonny, right as your eyes caught his.

Where there was once warmth and comfort was something crazed and dark.

Your door was barely open when his hand reached for your wrist once again.

Possessively, of course.

His large and daunting frame of his once brought a sense of protection and security earlier.

Now it was being used to make his way into your home, your sanctuary, all while his fingers reached for your cheeks, cupping them lovingly as he hummed with an all too sweet smile,

“You look lonely, love. Why don’t you let me in?”

[leonawriter]

If you think about it, the Yaldabaoth Deal Ending of the base game is basically Akira’s version of Maruki’s reality.

No one has to worry about anything, because god [Akira] solves all of their problems for them. While Maruki adjusts reality through cognition, Joker, under the name of the Phantom Thieves (regardless of whether the others are still around or if they’re still locked up in the Velvet Prison), continues to change hearts.

But while it’s the ultimate end of Akira’s saviour complex, playing into the darker side of his wanting to save and reform the world practically single-handedly, and how he can summon what’s basically a demon, it also goes against his principles as someone who’s been going through the Fool’s Journey, growing and learning past himself.

If this had been anything like the previous two entries, this would have been the turning point where the Fool Arcana undergoes some sort of transformation, and after this point reuniting with the Phantom Thieves would unlock Judgement, but Judgement was already taken up by Sae for the sake of framing the story up until the end of November.

So, effectively, it’s out of character (sorry to those who like it!) for the True Ending, just as the Accomplice route in P4G is OOC for Yu’s true ending.

I use those terms because some thoughts came to mind on seeing it referred to as the ending where he “saves all his friends but two, Akechi and Mona” and then talking about how it affects Morgana, as the incarnation of humanity’s hope (Morgana isn’t seen in that ending at all).

The way it relates to Morgana is - to me - simple and straightforward, because in a reality where everyone is relying on a higher power, and they’ve all given up free will and the ability to choose for themselves, the idea of “hope” (which Morgana embodies) is no longer needed. He... likely disappears the same way the Thieves do before Yaldabaoth’s deal is offered.

Akechi, though, is more down to interpretation, but I think it’s like this-

Akechi’s entire purpose in the plot up until this point has been to be the antithesis of what the Phantom Thieves represent. He goes on TV and says to the world “The Phantom Thieves are wrong for forcing someone’s mind into a shape they prefer, and effectively brainwashing them.” 

During the events of the game, many of targets - not all but many - are beyond the reach of the law, and there’s literally no other way for the victims to gain justice other than through “sacrilegious acts” for the sake of their own justice. And yeah, I’m implying Akira has at least some understanding that Changes of Heart aren’t things good, decent people do. But just as Arsène says, he’s willing to get his hands dirty.

Left unchecked, the Phantom Thieves can let things go to their heads, as we see prior to the Okumura arc, and it’s only by having someone who stands against them, that they’re balanced out, and that we can reach January. We SEE how Akechi fights against Maruki, and everything he stands for. 

So with that in mind, where IS Akechi in the Deal ending?

In my eyes, either he’s dead (possible, especially if you didn’t max his confidant in time, or if you go with “he was resurrected with the power of gay when reality got fixed in February”), or... he’s left in disgust, because Akira has become the very thing that Akechi hates the most. Someone who brainwashes people, who forces others’ hearts into a shape he prefers, and who takes away their control and free will.

It’s easy to imagine that the Yaldabaoth deal where, in spite of Akechi being the god of control’s original choice, and is the one where Akira works with Yaldabaoth, is actually one of two ways you can effectively reverse Akechi’s Confidant. One would be by taking Maruki’s deal (he even says “the deal’s off” when he leaves) and another would be here, because what is “confidant” other than “one you can trust in confidence,” and how can you call a person that if you can’t trust them anymore?

[skywommp]

My AU of the members of Ghost as an epic the musical inspired by The Odyssey :D

Ever since I heard the musical in class this morning, I felt inspired to create something of my own. I poured everything into this, hoping to shape it into something special.!!!

Odysseus: Mountain. He longs to return to his husband and child, who await him in Ithaca.

Penelope: Rain. he stands resilient, unwavering, as her husband Mountain approaches once more.

Polites: Swiss. A steadfast companion to Mountain, a figure of great importance to him.

Eurylochus: Aether. Not as close to Mountain, yet ever cautious and wary of the choices his friend makes.

Athena: Cirrus. A figure of wisdom, she guides and assists Mountain on his long-awaited return to Ithaca.

Hermes: Phantom. The divine messenger of the Papas, he offers Mountain the Holy Moli to conquer Circe's magic. (I think randy would say 'Blackpink in your area.)

Circe: Aurora. The guardian of the nymphs, wary of Mountain's intentions. She weaves deceit, attempting to sway him and safeguard her nymphs.

Telemachus: Cowbell. The courageous son of Mountain, steadfast and resolute, patiently waiting for his father's return to Ithaca.

Aeolus: Cumulus. The god of winds, who grants Mountain a bag containing the storms of the seas, offering both a blessing and a challenge on his journey to Ithaca.

Zeus: Papa 0. The all-powerful king of the gods, master of the heavens, whose command determines the destiny of both gods and men.

Scylla: Sunshine. Once a beautiful nymph, now a creature of terror, cursed by her own envy, her form forever altered to reflect the jealousy that consumed her.

Tiresias: Sodo. The blind oracle, whose wisdom spans across time, guiding Mountain with cryptic prophecies to navigate the perilous road ahead.

Hera: Sister. Regal and relentless, she stands as the divine embodiment of loyalty and vengeance, her gaze ever fixed on the balance between love and justice.

Calypso: Lake. A lonely goddess dwelling in still waters, he longs for companionship and tries to keep Mountain by her side forever.

Ares: Omega. The ruthless god of war, a relentless force in Zeus’s grand game of gods, reveling in bloodshed and divine rivalry

Aphrodite: Terzo. Lover of Omega, and a cunning participant in Zeus’s divine game, she weaves desire into every move she makes.

:DD

ODYSSEUS OF ITHACAAA!!!

[dragongodshomebrewhoard]

The False God

False Gods are living embodiments of faith. Whether they were once ordinary mortals whose cultlike following exalted them, or mysterious constructs born from an “original seed” of divine energy, False Gods derive their powers—and even their forms—from the beliefs of their devotees. Their appearance, abilities, and even personality can drastically change depending on what people revere (or fear) them for.

False God Traits

The following traits are common to most False Gods, though individual manifestations might vary wildly. Work with your DM if you want to tweak details to match your character concept.

Creature Type

Your creature type is Humanoid, though your nature is undeniably touched by the divine (or pseudo-divine).

Ability Score Increases

You can distribute a total of +3 among your Ability Scores. No single score can receive more than +2 from this trait.

(Alternatively, if your DM is using the optional rules from Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything, you can follow those guidelines for customizing your ability scores.)

Age

False Gods can appear at any age or stage of life. Once “ascended,” their apparent aging often slows or halts, their form maintained more by faith than biology. However, if the worship that sustains them declines, they may wither or revert to mortal aging.

Size

False Gods might stand scarcely three feet tall or tower over giants—faith defies conventional limitations. You can choose to be Small or Medium. With DM permission, you may even choose Large.

If you are Small or Medium, your base walking speed is 30 feet.

If you are Large (and your DM allows this option), discuss with them any implications for reach, carrying capacity, and cramped dungeons. A typical baseline might keep your walking speed at 30 feet but increase your carrying capacity and push/pull/drag limits.

Shifting Resistance (Divine Aspect)

Your quasi-divine essence grants you a supernatural tolerance. When you create your False God character, choose one damage type that reflects the core domain or nature your worshipers believe you embody (for example, firefirefire for a wrathful sun-god, coldcoldcold for a frost deity, necroticnecroticnecrotic for a death idol, etc.). You have resistance to that damage type.

With your DM’s permission, you might change this damage type later if your worship base shifts radically (e.g., you go from a fire-cult to a night-cult), but it’s usually a permanent choice at character creation.

Ascendant Locomotion

Your followers’ belief can manifest in remarkable modes of movement. Choose one of the following:

Winged Flight. You sprout ephemeral wings or otherwise hover on currents of faith. You have a flying speed of 30 feet. To use this speed, you can’t be wearing heavy armor, and you can’t be over-encumbered.

Aquatic Grace. You are revered as a sea-god or water spirit. You gain a swimming speed of 30 feet and can breathe both air and water.

Arachnid/Beastly Climb. You are worshiped as a bestial or spider-like deity. You gain a climbing speed of 30 feet and can climb difficult surfaces (even upside down on ceilings) without needing to make an ability check.

(DM’s Approval) Other Movement. If your theme suggests a different movement method—burrowing, phantom teleports, etc.—you can work out a balanced alternative with your DM (e.g., a short-range teleport a limited number of times per rest).

Divine Expression (Choose 1 of 3)

Faith grants each False God a unique “signature” ability, often reflecting their domain. At 1st level, choose one of the following expressions. You can use your chosen ability a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus per long rest.

Benevolent Boon.

Blessing Touch. As an action, you can touch a creature (or choose one creature within 30 feet that can see you, if your theme is more about emanating divine presence). That creature regains hit points equal to 1d8 + your proficiency bonus.

Alternatively, you could grant it advantage on its next attack roll or saving throw (your choice), lasting until the start of your next turn.

Once you choose which effect you’re using (healing or advantage), that specific usage counts against your limited uses.

Wrathful Manifestation.

Divine Smite. As a bonus action, choose a creature you can see within 30 feet. It must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw (DC = 8 + your proficiency bonus + your spellcasting ability modifier, if any) or take 2d8 radiant, necrotic, or another thematically appropriate damage (depending on your domain). On a failed save, the target is also Frightened of you until the start of your next turn. On a successful save, it takes half damage and is not frightened.

Miraculous Trickery.

Veil of Divinity. As an action, you wrap yourself in illusory faith-energy. You become invisible until the start of your next turn, until you attack, or until you cast a spell (whichever comes first). Alternatively, you can extend this illusion to one willing creature you touch (but not both you and them at the same time).

While invisible via this ability, you have advantage on Stealth checks, and attacks against you have disadvantage if they rely on sight.

(Feel free to re-flavor these abilities or design your own to match your specific “godhood” theme. Just keep them roughly equivalent in power.)

Languages

You can speak, read, and write Common and one other language that fits your background or domain (for example, Celestial for a light/dawn cult, Deep Speech for an eldritch horror cult, Primordial for an elemental cult, etc.).

Playing a False God

Roleplaying Tips:

Ego or Humility? Do you revel in the worship of others, or does it unsettle you?

Ever-Changing Form. Because faith shapes your being, you might subtly alter appearance, personality, or even powers if your followers’ beliefs shift.

Followed by Rumors. Is your cult big or small? Do common folk whisper your name in fear, or do traveling pilgrims spread tales of your miracles?

Adventure Hooks:

Crisis of Faith. What happens if your followers lose faith or are scattered? Do you lose part of your power, or does it unhinge your sense of self?

Cult Rivalries. Other false gods or actual deities might see you as a threat—or you might siphon worshipers from them.

Guardian or Menace. Mortals who know your true nature may worship you, try to exploit you, or attempt to destroy you for “playing god.”

Balancing Notes

Flight at 1st Level (or other alternative movement) is strong but not game-breaking if you keep armor restrictions or have certain environmental challenges.

Limited-Use Abilities scale with your proficiency bonus to stay relevant but avoid overshadowing full spellcasters.

Resistance to a single damage type is roughly in line with many official races (e.g., tieflings, aasimar, genasi).

Size Flexibility can introduce unusual scenarios if you choose Large. Discuss with your DM about space, reach, and potential mechanical hiccups (like grappling).

Use this framework as a starting point, then flavor and tweak it to fit the exact concept of your False God character in your campaign. Enjoy wielding the power of belief on the tabletop!

[gorekissed]

unprompted starter for @chainsofguilt

The neon-soaked streets of Tokyo were Sayuri’s kingdom. Not the shimmering, tourist-trap side, with its perfectly-lit ramen shops and chirping advertisements, but the underbelly, the festering wound of the city. Here, where shadows clung to rain-slicked concrete like second skins and the air vibrated with a different kind of energy.

This was a labyrinth of shadowed alleys, where chipped paint peeled from damp walls, and the stench of decay mingled with the metallic tang of rain. Ghouls hunted here, the most desperate and broken, their hunger for life manifesting as a raw, barely-contained violence. The scent of fear, thick and cloying, was as potent as the savory steam rising from the ramen stalls on the main drags; a constant reminder of the stakes in this grimy ecosystem.

Sayuri's reputation, a carefully constructed mosaic of whispered warnings and chilling anecdotes, preceded her around these parts of the city. Here, in the loose confederation of alleys and forgotten corners, the whispers went silent, choked in the throat, when she passed. The petty squabbles over scraps and territory ceased, freezing mid-sentence, like a forgotten melody. Even the most desperate ghouls, their eyes glinting with madness and hunger, dared not cross her path, their instincts screaming of the danger she embodied. 

She moved with a predator’s grace, each step deliberate and silent, her dark hair falling like a cascade of darkness around her pale face. The pallor of her skin accentuated the razor-sharp angles of her cheekbones and the unsettling intensity of her gaze. Tonight, the air thrummed with a restless tension, a low vibration that resonated deep within her bones. It was a familiar hum, but tonight, it felt… different, like a discordant note in a familiar symphony. The usual balance was subtly disturbed. She found the source of the anomaly near the dilapidated warehouse she’d claimed as her own – a skeletal structure of rusted metal and crumbling brick. A figure, lean and wiry, his form outlined against the faint glow of a distant streetlamp, was kicking at a rusted metal door, his movements jerky and agitated. He was muttering to himself, low, strangled growls that bordered on madness, each syllable laced with desperation. His words, indistinct and swallowed by the night, hinted at a turmoil that mirrored her own.

Sayuri watched from the deeper shadows, her gaze unwavering, a flicker of amusement – cold and sharp as shattered glass – momentarily lighting her usually icy stare. This wasn’t another hapless human prey, lost and bewildered, stumbling into the wrong part of town. No, this was... something else entirely. A dangerous current ran beneath the surface of his ragged appearance, a volatile cocktail of rage, desperation and a simmering pain that resonated with an uncomfortable familiarity. He exuded a potent energy, the raw, untamed kind that was both fascinating and perilous.

He finally managed to wrench the door open, the screech of metal echoing in the oppressive silence of the night like a scream ripped from the throat of the warehouse itself. He stumbled inside, disappearing into the inky blackness within, and Sayuri followed, drawn by a morbid curiosity. She moved like a phantom, her footsteps soundless on the damp earth, her presence veiled by skilled ease.

She found him in the center of the warehouse's ruins, pacing like a caged animal. The vastness of the space only seemed to amplify his restlessness, his every movement echoing in the emptiness. His spiky, two-toned hair, a chaotic mix of black and blonde, was a disheveled mess, each strand a testament to his inner turmoil. His eyes, wide and bloodshot, darted around the space with a frantic, almost manic intensity, searching for an escape that didn't exist. They were like the eyes of a wounded animal, caged and desperate, capable of both self-destruction and unpredictable violence. And then, in the dim light leaking from the open doorway, she recognized him. Kazutora Hanemiya. The notorious ex-member of the Tokyo Manji Gang, his name a hushed, cautionary whisper on the lips of the city’s underworld, a byword for chaos, unbridled violence and a darkness that seemed to precede him. He was freshly out of prison, his freedom still a tenuous thing, and the scent of confinement – stale cigarettes, disinfectant and a lingering hopelessness – clung to him like stale smoke.

Sayuri leaned against a support beam, her form blending effortlessly with the shadows. She let him rant, a torrent of curses and frustrated yells directed at the empty air, each word a jagged shard of pain and anger. The warehouse held him captive for now, but Sayuri knew, with a chilling certainty, that the storm brewing within Kazutora was far from over, and she was strangely compelled to watch it unfold.

"So, you're always this entertaining?" Her voice, like soft velvet, eventually broke through the darkness, hinting at amusement. She emerged from the shadows, her shape now clear, effectively ending his energetic display. "I think I'll keep you around for a bit."

[haikuprajna]

Space knights save the Queen, // the fate of the galaxy // balanced by the One

... Star Wars - Episode I: The Phantom Menace ... Haiku Prajna [Book Review]

Read online

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Hello reader,

Been on a Star Wars binge, reading the novelizations for the Skywalker Saga and other books featuring Anakin/Vader, starting with Terry Brooks’s “The Phantom Menace”, a story about a boy liberated from the desert planet Tatooine who finds himself in the middle of a sci-fi fantasy with knights protecting the Queen of Naboo from an assassin in league with the living embodiment of darkness.

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Thank you for reading,

Until next time!

Allen W. McLean

...

PS.

Rest in Peace, James Earl Jones.

...

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Share, subscribe or leave a comment, it means the world to authors and is the easiest way to support the work you read, as your comments will reach other readers! @HaikuPrajna @ElectricArmchair

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These poems will be collected in future editions of the HaikuPrajna Collection.

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[ekat-fandom-blog]

Masterpost thingy

Unless stated otherwise these are prompts. Not all are explained.

Welcome Celebration - Jason becomes a Lord/Knight of the Infinite Realms because of the All Blades.

Cass's Secret - Dragon au w/Cass & Dora

Haunted House - DannyxDamian go on a date. It ends poorly.

Best Memory, Worst Memory - Soulmate au w/ Barry and Danny

Soulmate Song - DanxDick

Meets me, Meets me not - Soulmate au w/ JazzxBruce

Fairy Tale Curse - 6 characters from DP and 6 characters from DC get cursed and have to complete 13 fairy tales.

Halfa Jason meets Jack Fenton

Whoopsie - Dick becomes a halfa.

Ghost Forms - My theory on how ghost forms work (at least for halfas)

Peter Pan AU - Danny becomes Peter Pan. JL become pirates.

Disappearing act - Justice League and Young Justice disappear. The Teen Titans (& Team Phantom) are left behind.

Electrical Trauma Fic - Nightwing triggers a trauma response in Danny.

Alternate Ric Incident - Dick becomes a halfa and meets Danny.

Date Week - Bruce and Selina go to Amity Park for a nice week off from the batkids. It doesn't go as planned.

Vlad Finds a Baby - Vlad finds a baby batkid.

Jason's Weird Day - Jason has a weird day. Dani's day is fine until she meets Jason and makes it weird.

Prompt - Danny guards some mythical beings in the watchtower

Shifter AU - Tim and Jason are cat shifters.

Immortal Enemies - Danny causes Vandal Savage's and Immortal Man's immortality.

Creepy sentence prompt

Part 1 Part 2 - Fic where sleep deprived Danny and Dani catch Klarion. Has the prompt attached.

Hogwarts Escape Room - The entire extended Justice League gets transported to a Hogwarts themed escape room and the Shazamily are the only ones that remember that fact. Edit: Might re-write this so I'm not using terf content. I haven't kept up with the Harry Potter bs and didn't realize it was that problematic until a few hours after it posted. The reason I'm leaving it as-is is because where this prompt takes place isn't too integral to the plot, but I haven't found a suitable replacement yet as it (preferably) still needs magic school ties. If anyone has suggestions, please let me know.

Batboys Boyband

Bounty Hunter DCxDP - Danny's a bounty hunter and he and his bounties run into DC heroes and villains.

Fear Toxin - Fear toxin gets an unexpected side effect.

Batfam Mythical Au Part 1 - Bruce is a dragon.

IDK What to call this one - Dani gets adopted. The Wayne's get curious. The Fenton's visit Gotham.

Bounty Hunter AU - Danny's a bounty hunter and the ghosts are his bounties.

Medieval Royal AU - Vlad is king of Wisconsin and Amity Park. This leads to Danny becoming a prince after some shenanigans.

Gods & Goddesses AU - What if the ghosts were gods instead.

Sleep Deprived Gala - Danny , Tim, and Jason go to a gala.

Adult - Captain Marvel needs an adult.

Flash meets a ghost - Flash runs into Cujo then Danny.

Proxy - Danny becomes Pariah's proxy and has to deal with anything that Pariah normally would if he was sane and awake.

Half Sibling - Prompt created by the prompt wheel. Tim is Jazz and Danny's half sibling.

Sleepy Time - Jazz, Sam, and Tucker force Danny to go to sleep. The Justice League freak out.

Dragons and Ghost - Batman's a dragon. Danny is a (half) ghost. The two are surprisingly similar.

How Monarchs are Chosen - Ghost King Danny. Dani's next in line. (I might add more in the future)

Supernatural Au - Dean!Danny and Sam!Jazz. I wouldn't say it's a crossover but I've been wrong before.

Angy Baby! - Dani finds Match and brings him to Amity Park.

Memory Loss Billy Batson - Captain Marvel forgets everything about Billy.

Stuck in the Ghost Zone - One of the DC heroes gets stuck in the Ghost Zone.

Constantine Bingo - Short fic I wrote based off the prompt. (prompt included)

Milk Blood - Based on the writing prompt of everyone being born with milk white blood and every time you break a law your blood gets darker.

Balance Au and (my and @wildcardjoey's) Additions - Danny is Lord(or embodiment, the additions focus on 'lord' tho) of Balance.

Memory Loss Danny - Danny loses his memory and joins YJ.

Uncanny Valley - Danny moves to Gotham. He looks like the Batboys. All of them.

Unholy amount of Holidays - Headcanon about how the batfam celebrates every holiday in December.

Luthor Adopts Conner - Luthor fights Superman for custody of Conner.

[metaphysicalpistolsoraclemine]

Multidimensional Communication

On earth we exist in a blended reality system that is enduring bifurcation. The progressive disentanglement of two main organizational templates in the earth body, has manifested a blended reality system that is competing between artificial intelligence timelines and organic creator code timelines. The artificial machined layers are running metatronic coding designed to fully mutate the original human DNA into genetically engineered AI blended bodies. The artificial machined layers are fully inorganic to humanity, are technologically based and stacked in a phantom matrix which is projected out into false holograms by an artificial core manifestation template, or Artificial Tree of Life.

Therefore, when multidimensional awareness is activated into subtle energy field perceptions, it then becomes critical to comprehend how to discern the difference between these forces – artificial impostors and organic creator code source. What is the source field of these mental reality pictures or multidimensional communications, and how do they make your body feel?

Activated individuals using remote viewing or multidimensional communication will be required to reach spiritual adulthood quickly, by developing the emotional maturity to seek truth in these matters or suffer the consequences of succumbing to Archontic based deceptions. There are consequences from engaging in multidimensional communication with AI driven entities and their sophisticated mental holograms that are used as consciousness traps, as many traps use astral glamour to generate egoic programs of spiritual ambition and hero-savior-messiah complexes to continue to loop and perpetuate the victim-victimizer software. The consequence of AI entanglements instigates a lack of energetic coherence which increases mental fracturing, emotional fragility and a lack of empathy, as AI nano encoded downloads will substantially weaken the mental body and lightbody functions into a downward spiral of erupting chaotic forces and erratic behaviors.  What is imperative is to focus upon building energetic coherence through heart-based centering, and strengthening personal balance within multidimensional orientation, in order to hold a strong neutral still point. Harmonizing the inner and outer energies that you are being exposed to through maintaining strong observer consciousness, especially during energy sessions and multidimensional communication. Otherwise stated, this is the ability to hold inner peace and calm no matter what you perceive, while in the midst of external forces erupting into utter chaos.  

The lack of understanding and mental confusion about the nature of the reality and the war over consciousness on earth is what blocks awakening individuals from perceiving the larger truth in the matter. When we gain a larger awareness of the macrocosmic view, this allows a vantage point by which to connect more of the dots into a cohesive whole, that makes sense to a clear and sane mind. The more perceptual awareness we gain through integrative spiritual embodiment of our higher consciousness bodies, the more energetic coherence we also gain to perceive the macrocosmic picture of what is really happening on the earth. When we perceive the macrocosmic picture, it includes the war over consciousness, and then when we encounter strange energetic phenomena, we are equipped to discern more easily what is based in artificial intelligence, imposters or organic creator code. Sometimes it contains a mixture of all of it, which will help with finding stronger discernment of the content in the message.

The war over consciousness on earth uses sophisticated artificial intelligence and alien machinery for mind control and perceptual interference for the purpose of psychological and spiritual warfare, to subjugate the population of earth to submit to consciousness slavery. Thus, the ability to discern false information being used in deceptive narratives, enforced by the imposters to manipulate and control perception, requires the individual clearly understand the motivations behind those committing military grade psycho-spiritual warfare. With this deeper knowledge, along with the cultivated ability to access energetic coherence through the synthesis of the higher heart-brain, gives rise to receiving more authentic information from the living crystal heart of the truth spirit. Our inner spirit communicates from our heart complex with much higher accuracy, to give us a proper assessment of the downloaded information or the current energetic conditions we find ourselves in. Gaining knowledge about the macrocosm protects and strengthens us as we have access to information that allows us to make more informed decisions about where we place our intent, consent and authority.

When we do not understand the mechanics behind multidimensional communication and perceptual awareness of the energetics in the environment as a natural process of bio-spiritual ascension, then it is extremely difficult for the individual to be able to decipher and discern the source of the energy contact through which these higher sensory functions actually emerge. This vulnerability is exploited aggressively by the Controlling forces and dark entities who employ every level of psychological warfare and sophisticated false flag manipulation tactics, through mental holograms that target awakening individuals to mind control and manipulate their perceptions into falsehoods or twisted half-truths.

Reading Energy Fields

The multidimensional language of light, sound and symbols are the carriers through which interdimensional communication can take place, between any kind of living consciousness entity and energetic structure that exits across dimension and beyond time.  It is important to understand that this is how multidimensional communication is transmitted and exchanged throughout the layers of energy fields, such as when communicating with interdimensional entities or reading intelligent information that is contained within timelines. Interdimensional entities that are benevolent, hostile and neutral all use this same form of multidimensional communication, the language of light and sound. The NAA have fused the native language of humanity with artificial intelligence technology in order to clone, replicate and mimic human biology and the human soul-spirit anatomy on multiple artificial planes, in which they exert control over this language to interfere with perceptual awareness.

Thus, the dark entities abuse this method of false light cloning of DNA signals with assorted electromagnetic technology, as a method of directing artificial machinery for the purpose of psycho-spiritual warfare. These are the silent weapons used in a quiet war to target awakening humans in order to keep them confused, fearful, distracted from the truth and believing in the controlled narrative. Assorted nanotechnology, vaccinations and chemical sprays combined with electromagnetic consciousness sweeps are used to suppress consciousness levels, by targeting demographic areas of the earth in which swaths of people are known to be awakening. Many that activate their innate abilities are told that they have mental illness and require pharmaceuticals, in order to turn off the genetic switches that enable the DNA’s natural function of reading and sensing energies in the environment.

This higher sensory skill set is generally automatic and even pre-loaded for those individuals that are natural intuitive empaths, as they have retained more of their energy receivers and transmitters within their lightbody, that allow them to more easily sense and read an assortment of energy fields. Millennials and younger children that have not undergone puberty, tend to retain their empathic skillsets until they are over vaccinated or indoctrinated to forget while in the educational system or working environments. Telempathic children have been used in the black military operations for nearly 80 years as psychic intuitives to gather intelligent information for carrying out an array of secret projects. Thus, this higher sensory ability is well known to be naturally occurring in human beings and is purposely hidden and vilified in the mainstream by the Controllers to prevent mainstream knowledge of the fact. The public has been brainwashed through extensive gaslighting tactics and fear, to deny their own consciousness experiences, while also denying the validity of other human being’s perceptions when activated to read energy fields. All of these higher sensory experiences are classified in the 3D narrative under unapproved topics and they attempt to punish those who openly talk about it. Since the NAA invasion, humanity has been mind controlled and socially engineered to delegate power to an outside authority of control, which intentionally withholds knowledge of multidimensional anatomy in order to enforce blind obedience and hijack this natural ability, which is a full attack made against personal self-sovereignty.

As individuals awaken their spiritual bodies, more of these natural abilities to read multidimensional energy fields and sense entities and their structures becomes available. It is further developed through cultivating the observer point and directing single minded focus through the higher mental bodies that are inherent in the mental matrices that are comprised in the spiritual body layers. As an individual intends to develop their consciousness and spiritual bodies, along with their unique DNA signature, it is possible to experience consciousness transport activities that include remote viewing and sensing a variety of energy phenomena that co-exist in the many different layers of dimensional fields. This can include an array of various entities of human or nonhuman origin and their energy structures, as well as machinery, implants, architecture, and entire realities which can be sensed as artificial or organic to this creation. The potentials of what can be sensed and explored energetically in the dimensional fields are indeed limitless. The caveat is that the mind must be incredibly strong and stable, fearless and anchored in the truth spirit, in order to withstand the immense pressure of knowing truth. What we fear controls us.

The intention, skill and accuracy through which an awakened individual can activate the natural ability to ‘read the field’ is relative to the removal of fears, the full dedication to Service to Others, and placing total single-minded mental concentration to discipline and transcend the dysfunctions of the negative ego mind. While sensing the field, to regain discernment and increase accuracy of sourcing a variety of phenomena, it becomes critical to understand the war over timelines, and to be able to identify artificial technology projections of mental holograms, versus authentic communication with organic creator code and organic consciousness sourcing from the truth spirits. The information is still filtered at the consciousness level the individual embodies; however, the source will be much more pristine and spiritually healthy, as truth spirits always advocate for full consciousness freedom and support personal sovereignty for every individual.

[rawliverandgoronspice]

In Descant, how does Ganondorf command monsters? By turning them loose in a direction of his choosing, by using magic to enthrall them, through negotiation, or varies depending on the intelligence. I remember reading lizalfos warred with the Zora in BOTW and had structure enough to have a general

So... To be honest, I kind of decided to be a little sparse on the magical worldbuilding to avoid causing myself a concussion given this is originally a side-project and not something meant to consume my every waking thought (this is not going great right now but I'll stir it back under control eventually). I do have one, however, and it's loosely related to this.

(I kind of infodump about my magic system instead of really answering the question sorry sorry)

I decided to use the basis of the different "realms" of magical abilities embodied by the Sages in OoT: so Light, Forest, Fire, Water, Shadow and Spirit. Each of these elements encompass both a very literal manipulation of this element (whenever possible, right Spirit :) :) :) ) and a more complicated manipulation of energies associated with this element. For example: Shadow magic involves manipulating darkness directly (making a place spookier or shrouding oneself), but taken to an extreme it also encompasses decay, fear, everything dissimulated --and also, because of the nature of what is most hidden, truth. Fire is about arson, and it's also about drive and consumption; Forest is about the neat little trees, and it's also about growth and patience and ancient knowledge, etc etc. Part of mastering a given element is deepening your understanding and of just everything it really encompasses and the very complex web of how it truly affects reality, and how you can inject your own input of energy to affect it to your liking.

So a lot of basic monsters in Descant are kind of bound to being fueled by a given type of magic --and so sometimes it's just that there's Vibes in a place and so monsters appear there as a coproduct, and sometimes (and Ganondorf loves to do this) through upsetting said Vibes of a place, you can mess up the internal balance and generate an "infection", aka drastically and brutally change the magical ecosystem and invoking a bunch of things by doing so. In this kind of situation, Ganondorf isn't bound to these creatures like an invoker would be (like they don't have to obey him through a magical contract or anything), but given he generally is the person in the room with the most mastery over the type of magic that fuels the monsters he encouraged the proliferation of, the loose alliegeance happens pretty naturally. They serve his purposes, even if half-consciously and not in a way that he can use to make complex strategies like he would with actual soldiers or more complicated creations (like his phantoms).

Then, for more complex cultures where the monsters are not gohmas or redeads or things like this, I think there might be negotiations or something of a higher caliber going on but it's not a part of Descant I focused on a lot and I mostly brushed over it for the sake of uhhh narrative simplification, because it was already spinning out of control!!!

Thank you so much for your curiosity!!