#Eat crap Poseidon

[rin-solo]

Hello and welcome to some silly Vengeance Saga doodles including my contribution to the elite "Poseidon and Athena share a hospital room" concept :3

Ft. Traumatized to Unhinged Odysseus and Vlogger Hermes

[gardenmonotony]

meanwhile on Olympus

(Video description: The gods in Athena's hospital room watching Odysseus stab the crap out of Poseidon. Their reactions are a mix of shocked and enthusiastic. Hermes is eating popcorn.)

[chaostroberry1]

Haii can you do a hcs of the Greek brothers (Zeus included but it's fine if you don't want to) to their S/O who is a mortal from the modern era?? I rllyy like your writing especially the Apollo's one ^^

Ofc! I'm sorry for the long wait 🙇‍♀️ I've been eating and rotting in my bed for a while. I dont really know about what you are requesting, there's only very little description. So I'll try my best ^^

RoR Greek bros with modern mortal s/o

Zues

- Mf is old as hell, literally. He'd be asking you all sorts of crap and wonder about the technology you have. He already knows about it, but he does like to stare and wonder what you do all day in that little rectangular piece of technology.

- He also tries to find ways to make you immortal, cus duh, he really likes you. But I think he'd be interested in cute little farm games online when you show him the stuff that you can do on your phone.

- he asks you to buy him a gadget, which you do so. but man, he sucks ass at it. You find him trying to figure out how to use it. Holding it upside down, pressing on all sorts of buttons until you have to lend me some help.

- he's also fond of the slangs and way you talk. He often uses your words too. Like "Lmfao!" Or "LOL!!"

- he wants to learn more about modern society, and everything there is to learn about. Until he found out about google. Mf now keeps on asking the stupidest questions, and even calls his brother's on facetime, just to talk to them about the stupidest shit.

- he'd laugh so loud when it comes to you telling him jokes from your TikTok brainrots and all.

- you talk to him about all the newest things happening, and all. And drama. But I think he's more interested in learning new words.

Adamas

- yes he does use the slangs too. I bet he'd randomly gangsta talk outta nowhere and make the most out of pocket statements.

- give him some love, he's just having fun especially after all the stuff he went through.

- I know damn well he makes yo mama jokes, no matter how old that stuff be. He's older than you bro, he's been alive for a very long time. So you better teach him more to mama jokes.

- your fashion sense was interesting, he wanna dress cool too. So he's gonna force you to show him clothes that he'd like to wear, and he'd pick the edgiest ones. 😭

- he often gets annoyed at how you're always on your phone and not paying attention to him, which makes him wonder what's so good about it.

- you gave him a gadget, which he now likes to watch anime in, or sports probably. Basically anything interesting.

Hades

- he finds you very endearing, and loves you very much. He'd find a way to turn you immortal so that he can care for you forever.

- yes he installed wifi in his place so that you could stay happy, and do whatever the hell you do on your gadgets.

- Bet you bought a TV and watched anime there with him, or maybe TV series or shows. Could even be horror movies. He loves to cuddle up with you whenever you guys watch a horror movie, cus he knows that he'll be the one to protect you when you get scared or tired.

- when you gave him a gadget, he didn't know what to use it for, but you said that he could chat with other people no matter where they at. And even store photos of whatever he wanted.

- it truly amazed him how far humanity had evolved. Now he can just search up anything he had questions about, or facetime his brother's, or buy something for you.

- he likes to listen to songs he finds, and now he's never really bored like he used to be. Maybe gadgets weren't so bad. He knows how to limit himself, and that's why he tries to limit it fro you too. He doesn't want your eyes to hurt, and wants you to get rest.

- there's so many things he wants to learn from you. And how humans do their daily thing. It's amusing to watch.

Poseidon

- Bro he really loves you a lot, he just doesn't show it. But it definitely caught his attention seeing the odd way you talked or acted.

- when you introduced him to a gadget, he just shook it off, not wanting to get into pathetic little things like that, but you insisted. So now there he was.

- he really thought that humans were babied. The fact that they all gotten so lazy over the centuries gave him the ick.

- but he did find some helpful words to use whenever it came to describing stuff. But that's till doesn't help with anything. Like y'all have google, you don't need to waste your time studying when you can just do a quick search and boom, all the answers are there.

- you guys had online shopping, you didn't need to use your legs to do some work when you could just order online. And so much more. Humanity was babied. Everyone was pathetic in his eyes.

- but, you were an exception. Cus he liked you lots.

- I believe that over time, he'd catch himself talking like you, like "it gives me the ick." 💀

- he's such a bitch, but it's ok. Cus it's Poseidon.

[bones4thecats]

haiiii!!

ok so I hope this is not to much but can you mix the two fandoms of pirates of the Caribbean and record of ragnarok but here’s what u want the plot to be like and you can changed it if you like bc this was like the biggest brainstorm I ever had but anyways so the reader is married to William turner but the reader is also fighting for the humans . Most of her/his comrades ( Nikola Tesla, Raiden, Qin, and the other campions on the humans side expect for Adam that knows the reader married but doesn’t know who till the end ) has feelings for them and so does the gods (Poseidon, hades, Thor, hermes, Heracles, and the other campions for the gods side) they have been trying to court the reader cus why not 🤭and the day before the ragnarok officially begins the gods and humans are eating dinner together but sitting in separate tables for obvious reasons, brunhilde surprises the reader by bringing her/his husband (William turner) ( but if you don’t know which movie to follow the plot like this like when William becomes the captain of the Flying Dutchman) you know the reader and William has there reunion like you know them being dramatic the reader runs into Williams arms as he spins her around and kisses her lovingly while tears of joy stream downs there face due to being apart for ten years the gods and humans are shocked and a little heart broken , and like they start asking questions the readers answers and you can do the rest on your own if you like cus that’s all I thought about for the past 15 mins but anyways sorry if this is to much :3

A/N: I decided to write for three humans, if you want any Gods, you can send in a request when my inbox re-opens. Enjoy!

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🦅 Lü Bu had admired your strength for quite a while now

🦅 You were once known as a fearsome pirate that traveled with the once prideful Captain Jack Sparrow, but nobody knew how much your life changed after meeting William Turner

🦅 Lü Bu loved to challenge anybody he deemed worthy to fight, and you were one of the rare few that could give him a bite back

🦅 You could say his admiration evolved into slight, slight, feelings for you, as he never really allowed himself to think of anything outside of battle or friendship

🦅 He was sitting beside his fellow human fighters when he heard Goll shriek in happiness, to which everyone in the area reacted

🦅 A young male stood beside you as he laughed at Goll's antics, that was when he discovered what happened to you after your journey aboard the seas

" Everyone, this is my husband, Captain of the Flying Dutchman, William Turner! Will, these are my fellow fighters. "

🦅 Lü Bu felt his heart tug at the sides, he had no idea you were married, and thankfully, he didn't act on his feelings, as that would make him feel like the biggest piece of crap in Valhalla

🦅 Unlike others, Lü Bu could push his feelings aside like nothing, so when you introduced your husband to your friend, it wasn't hard for him to get along with Will

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🩸 Jack admired you not just for your strength, but for your personality

🩸 You shined a color he had never seen before, at least one he hadn't seen so strongly and so openly

🩸 As a true English gentleman, Jack did not wish to court you without your permission, and he planned after dinner that night, he would ask for your permission

🩸 Jack watched as Brunhilde brought in a young man wearing an old-fashioned pirate outfit, and his eyes widened slightly as you ran up and let him twirl you around before dipping you in for a kiss

🩸 And that kiss hurt his heart so much

🩸 William flushed when he noticed how many people were in the room, to which you laughed and introduced him to everyone there

🩸 Jack knew he wasn't the only admirer of you, but others took the news far better than him

🩸 He's good at masking his feelings, so watching as you happily sit by your husband while speaking to Jack and the others was a time that nobody could tell he was feeling quite down

🩸 William did though. And when he confronted him about it, Jack just answered him honestly, and William accepted it

🩸 Will knew you had these admirers, and he understood why, and since Jack had treated you and him so respectively, despite the hard hit, William just gave him the best advice he could

🩸 Jack watched as he walked away with you, and he couldn't lie

🩸 You and William deserved each other, and while Jack knew you wouldn't feel the same about him, being your friend and ally was a place he could stay and be happy

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🥊 Not gonna lie, Raiden reminded you of Jack Sparrow, a lot

🥊 From the way his determination and arrogance clouded his judgement and led to quite a few people knocking him down a few pegs, it just reminded you of the man you considered to be a brother so much

🥊 Raiden had romantic feelings for you ever since he had first seen you fight against Sasaki Kojiro during a practice session

🥊 The way you held yourself was something he admired and because of that, it evolved into something far more serious

🥊 He leaned back in his chair, and when he saw the kiss you and William shared that night, it made him sit up and ask who he was, along with others, but he was a main person to get a hint angry

🥊 Why did he not realize you were married?

🥊 William was very respectful towards you, and Raiden couldn't help but compare himself to the young captain

🥊 You loved the way he talked to gently and with so much passion for his crew and job, despite the long time he was forced to stay away from you

🥊 After dinner, Raiden sat awake and pondered why he felt this way. And when he realized why, it broke his heart, but, unlike certain people, he pushed his feelings to the front lines and he hid himself away for hours on end

🥊 Once he finally processed everything, he got along with Will surprisingly well, and while his feelings for you may never truly fade away, if this guy makes you happy, it's worth every minute

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Hestia

This is another eternally virgin goddess, so we're doing another pseudo-demigod by adoption (like we did with Athena).

Demigod MC: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena, Hades Pt. 2, Poseidon, Ares, Hestia

Hestia is the goddess of the Hearth, Home, Architecture, Domesticity, Family, and the State. She's high up there (firstborn of Rhea and Cronus), but several factors have led to her falling into the background when compared to the other (flashier) Olympians. She swore to never marry, rejecting proposals from both Poseidon and Apollo, and is something of an antithesis to Aphrodite.

Lucifer

Honestly? He thought they were exactly what they were after. A weak human with no experience in the magical world what-so-ever.

Well… He was half-right.

On the surface, this is a pretty weak human. They don't have super flashy powers or a divine birth from the gods… but they do have a very protective adoptive mother.

The brothers had just settled in for their first dinner with the new human when the goddess herself strolled into their dining room, asked who was in charge, then dragged Lucifer away by the ear!

She's not even his mother, yet he felt the intense urge to apologize and put himself in his own room��� Oh, the humiliation… at least she did the same to Diavolo…

The Prince was only able to calm her down by promising absolutely NO harm would come to her child… on their heads...

By the time the goddess finally let him go, Lucifer was about ready to shackle the MC to his wrist so nothing could touch them but he settled on keeping them with him like an assistant of sorts. They were in charge of helping him with the paperwork so he could keep an eye on them. 

What he didn’t expect was for them to be so… good at it? They could keep his offices clean, they managed his daily schedule, fixed up the House, and still have time to bring him tea and sweets every night!

They could even reign in his brothers somehow… They weren't strong or intimidating, but one or two mildly unhappy words out of them and everybody would be on their best behavior.

Was everyone positive they're only human...?

As much as he hated to admit, he may have a slight deep case of falling for the housekeeper… He would make a move, but well…

He has Beel to contend with first.

Mammon

Okay so, watching Lucifer get dragged out by the ear just like Raphael used to do to him was hilarious!!! The whole room got a good laugh! 🤣

Until Hestia glared at them and suddenly they all felt like they'd disappointed someone important….

And all that fuss over some dumb human??

So what if they made amazing food?

So what if they could clean the entire mansion in a day?

So what if they were the walking equivalent to a warm cup of cocoa on a winter's day??

So what if they were just the kindest, sweetest thing in this godforsaken hellscape and he would throw himself in front of a bus to keep them safe-

-Wait, when did that happen?!?

Seriously, Mammon's attachment to the MC came out of NOWHERE to him. One day, he was threatening to eat their soul and the next he's freaking out when they stub their toe!

He swears they have to have some kind of magic about them! A charm, or a spell, or… their lovable smile and warm, loving hugs...! 😊

Damnit!! They're too cute!! He needs them to go away but also never leave, thanks. 😒

In all seriousness, though their kind nature puts Mammon's tsundere self at a bit of a disadvantage, his protective instincts shoot through the roof whenever they're involved.

Naturally, that means his day is spent running them away from hungry lesser demons or shielding them from Beel and Lucifer's tug-of-war matches… He's a busy guy these days. 😖

Leviathan 

They're so… so… MOE!!!

That was his immediate thought when Mammon brought them home. He was expecting a defenseless human, but not one that could have stepped out of one of his slice-of-life manga!

To be honest, his instant thought was try and find a place to sit them on his shelves with the rest of the adorable characters he loves… 😅

And that was before they even opened their mouth! Five words into their introduction and he was ready to get their face on a t-shirt!!

Honestly, combine their natural cuteness with their household skills and they made for perfect waifu/husbando material… 

Not helped by the fact they found one of his maid/butler outfits while doing the laundry one day. Not only did they ask if they could wear it, they actually non-ironically liked it and started wearing it around the House!!

Oh he got cornered by Beel, Lucifer, and Mammon separately that day because they thought he was using them for fetish fuel… But it was their idea, he swears!!

I mean… He didn't discourage them or anything either but still…

If Beel hadn't claimed them on Day One, Levi might have eventually thrown his hat in the ring too... Oh well… he can pine from a distance… What else is new? 😔

Satan

He has a video of Hestia dragging Lucifer out of the dining room on his phone and it's one of his most treasured possessions now. 😌

He is perhaps the only person in the House who was not at all impressed with their little human.

So they could cook? So could he. So they can clean? That's not impressive. They could manage a household? Big deal, he's more or less been in charge of the same thing for centuries!

As far as he saw it, there was nothing the MC could do that he couldn't do as proficiently or even better. There was nothing remarkable about this human at all!

… except for one thing.

That maid/butler outfit of Levi's? The one they like to wear around?

It has cat accessories…

Either they don't notice or they don't mind it but they essentially walk around the House cleaning things with little kitty ears attached to their head and a bell on their collar…

Dammit… Why did Levi even buy that?!?

Satan ended up getting in trouble for enchanting their outfit to give them REAL ears and a tail "accidentally..." Lucifer strung him up by his toes, Beel gave him a black-eye, and Mammon still calls him a "perverted cat freak" but it was worth it, he says, worth it!!

Asmodeus 

Oh Beel…

Asmo saw Beel's feelings for the MC coming from a mile away. He didn't even need to confirm it with a sniff check, he had them scented by the end of their first night!

Lucifer, on the other hand, now that was a surprise... 😏

Ask him a century ago if Lucifer would ever consider a human lover, godly mother or no, and he'd have laughed! Yet here he is, giving gifts and sneaking whiffs of their adorable new housemate!

Of course, that's causing some commotion because they're pitted against each other, but Asmo finds it kind of cute honestly. 

Beel and Lucifer aren't fighting, not for real. The whole house knows Lucifer would win in a real brawl, but neither of them actually want to hurt the other… They're far too close for that.

So Beel tosses Lucifer around with kid gloves and Lucifer holds back considerably against Beel. It's pretty much just two brothers who love each other squabbling over the same toy… 🤭

Honestly, Lucifer might have bowed out by now and just let Beel have them but now his pride's on the line… thus an endless tussle between family and the sweet MC is in the middle, clueless to it all!

Tragic, is it not? But it certainly makes things more entertaining around here! (Good thing too since Beel beat him to the punch… If it's a fight against those two, he'll have to keep any of his own affairs with the MC under the radar... 😏)

Beelzebub 

He has claimed this one. Full stop.

For a bit of perspective: when Barbatos needs cooking tips, he calls Hestia. Hestia, the Divine Master of All Things Cooking. Hestia, the goddess who raised this MC… 

Needless to say if they have any magic at all, it's in the kitchen.

If food is the way to Beel's heart, this MC has claimed his heart, soul, and probably all of his vital organs. Their food is astounding!! Always perfect every time and so good it brings him to tears!

It started the night of that first dinner, prepared by MC. He was too busy scarfing down the table to even notice a goddess showed up and then he proposed to the MC with their own pig roast by meal's end!

They said no to marriage, but an instant pact agreement suited him just fine.

Beel didn't waste a single moment before he started treating them like a potential mate, territorial aggression and all, but there was a bit of a catch… He kept the MC totally oblivious to it.

Surprisingly, Beel's can turn the "They're MINE" part of his brain on and off pretty well. He's nothing but sweet and cuddly to the MC when they're around and even with his brothers!... as long as they don't try anything.

The moment he caught whiff that Lucifer might be pursuing them too, it was on. Suddenly the two brothers who almost never fight were in competition against each other! But of course, both have an unspoken rule to never do so in front of MC.

And now poor MC believes it's common for demons to "play wrestle" like puppies and hugs are traditionally supposed to be so hard they could snap spines… 

And it doesn’t look like they'll be backing down any time soon… Oh dear...

Belphegor 

You know what? For once, everything goes exactly to plan for Belphie!

No really, this MC has no hidden powers, no magic horses, not even Demon Nip. They are a helpless, trusting little human who just wants to help their big teddy bear get his twin back!

So, you know how it goes. The charm, the lies, the treachery and all of that. He even gets to kill them!! Oh, happy days!! 😁

Come to think of it, they did smell an awful lot like Beel… But who cares, as long as Lucifer suffers right?? And this whole "living together in harmony" crap fails, right?!

Wrong. 

Beel went ballistic. Lucifer did too, but Beel was what really hurt…

Belphie can safely say that in all of his life, Beel has never physically attacked him. Not once, or at least, not with intent to kill… 

But when the sixthborn's fist went crashing through the wall right by his ear that day, he knew his brother's first instinct was to aim for his head… and his second was to miss, as he still loved him, but only by just a little.

What the hell did he just do??

Thank their father for Barbatos and all the funky time stuff he can do because bringing the MC "back" snapped his angry brothers right out of it. 

Things should have been smoothed over at that point but as everyone was finally settling down for tea, Hestia made another appearance in the House… this time carrying a butcher's knife!

Time fix or no, Diavolo had promised her no harm would come to MC and at least one continuity of them DIED… so punishment was now on Lucifer and the Demon Prince himself!

Belphie, in a rare case of guilt and an expression of brotherly love, offered to take their place since it WAS kind of all his fault. His gesture softened the Goddess of Family juuust enough to lighten his sentence from execution to hard labor.

And thus, the MC had their own housekeeping assistant for a whole year, complete with bitter reluctance and a matching maid outfit! Cat-theme and all!!

He's sending nightmares to anybody who laughs… guaranteed. 😒

[greektravelblog]

Day 4

Today was the day I finally had the "holy crap, I'm in Greece" moment. At 12:30, a small group of us (thank god) departed and made our way to Cape Sounion. Cape Sounion is well known for the Temple of Poseidon that stands on the top of the hill, greeting incoming boats. It is involved in two famous myths. The creation of the olive tree, and the journey of Theseus.

The first one goes like this:

When trying to determine who would be the patron god of the city of Athens, Poseidon and Athena both stood out. They began to fight for the patronage, and when she realized that fighting was futile, Athena suggested a competition. Her and Poseidon would create something for the city, and the inhabitants would select the best one. Poseidon, struck his trident to the ground, and salt water began to flow. His gift to the inhabitants was a salt water fountain. Athena, created the very first olive tree. The inhabitants recognized that they could use every bit of the olive tree for fuel, food, and trade so they named the city after her. However, Athens was a very naval central power. They needed to stay on good terms with the god of the seas if they wished to survive. So to appease him, they built the Temple of Poseidon at Cape Sounion and would travel before every voyage to receive his blessing.

The second is a bit more complex.

In the myth, there is a creature called a Minotaur. The king of Crete held it in a Labyrinth beneath the city, and would hold a blood tax every five years. Since Crete was the power at the time, he would call seven Athenian boys and seven Athenian girls to be brought to Crete to be thrown into the Labyrinth to die. Each boat that left Athens with children held black sails. Tired of the death of children, Theseus, the prince of Athens asked his father to be allowed to travel to Crete with the children in order to kill the Minotaur. Aegeus, his father, was reluctant as Theseus was his only child, but he relented when Theseus promised to return on a ship with white sails, symbolizing his success. Theseus did in fact slaughter the beast with the help of the Cretan princess Ariadne whoh gifted him a magic ball of thread to guide him out of the maze. Taking her home as his wife, they stopped at another small island along the way. When Theseus discovered her flirting with the god of wine, Dionysus, he left quietly, abandoning her there. She was so furious, she cursed him. It wasn't anything seemingly gorey, but her curse of forgetfulness caused Theseus to return with black sails, not white. When Aegeus saw the sails from the cliff at Cape Sounion, he believed his only son dead. In despair, he flung himself off the cliff, killing himself. The sea is now called the Aegean Sea, in honor of him.

While these stories aren't very happy-go-lucky they make sense when you're standing in the same spot. It really feels as if these things could have happened. It seems magical almost. I sat on an ancient piece of marble and I struggled to respond to M as she talked to me about something. I am in Greece. I'm sitting on a chunk of rock that was mined, shaped, and placed thousands of years ago by people who were so technologically and emotionally advanced that they created my favorite thing in the world: theatre. I mean, it doesn't get much cooler than that.

After we left, we drove a bit before stopping at a beach. We got some swimming in before having an amazing lunch that had 6 courses, including zucchini fries and the best calamari I've ever eaten. On the way back, once the ocean is out of sight, I promptly fell asleep. Currently, I'm sitting with my roommate R and eating some chicken kabobs with tzatzikis sauce and that rocking lemonade. Over all, best day so far. And hopefully, you'll see me again Cape Sounion.

Things I've taken away from today:

Yes, the water is that clear.

Don't bike in Greece, you'll die.

No food goes to waste, which is why the strays are so well fed/taken care of/

Greek gelato is the best I've had so far.

The water is really salty, so floating is easy in the Aegean.

I'm in love with this place.

[popculturebuffet]

House of Mouse Reviews: House Ghosts: I Pity the Fool Who Doesn't Like.. He (Commissioned by WeirdKev27)

Happy halloween all you happy people! It’s the spooky season and while i’m knee deep in the evil dead,I still got time for some other spooky stuff along the way. And today we’re looking at one of the three House of Mouse Halloween Specials. Though unlike most months we’re doing things a bit diffrently: Normally, Kev, my finacial backer, usually uses patreon for these episodes. But since he wanted to save it for Mickey’s House of Villians, he’s paying for them himself. This means...

In terms of review quality, pace or any of that, I just felt it worth mentioning at least once. 

Speaking of worth mentioning for some reason the copy of this episode I found online was squished into a small aspect ratio. I had to double up on photos because the screencaps I took were so small they didn’t fill the tumblr screen.  Gee it’s almost like Disney should have HD copies on say a streaming service that has a two year anniversary coming up so we don’t have this problem nor have to go to unoffical sources to watch the show. WHAT A CONCEPT. 

But while the aspect ratio was screwed up was the episode? Join me under the cut and find out. 

House Ghosts:

It’s HALLOWEEEEENNN at the house of mouse and Mickey’s dressed up like a dracula, readying the house for their halloween festivties including a costume contest, which includes Timon and Pumbaa dressing up like Donald and Mickey, the closest Disney has ever gotten to justifying this tweet. 

Donald wants to win and thus has a runner going to the mirror from Snow White to ask if his costume is good. It’s fun enough with him dressing as Woody, Buzz and Flick. The resolution is also mildly hilarious as it turns out Minnie was just roasting him this whole time, and really liked his costumes. I don’t know why I just get a kick out of minnie being a bit of a dick. 

There’s honestly not a lot of plot with this one, as it’s mostly an excuse for gags, but given the gags are very funny that’s okay. The most of a plot we get is Pete, who , mad people aren’t accepting him going around in his underwear as a costume and are instead doing this...

Just like his ex wife, he unleashes the hitchiking ghosts from the haunted mansion, who do their little ditty , scaring the crap out of him with nods to the ride I don’t get because I never went on it when I went to disneyland. Still it’s a heck of a number and just because I don’t know the ride, dosen’t mean I didn’t throughly enjoy the song or don’t recognize that it slaps. It slappy slaps

..... okay so it's not my best writing. But your not R.L. Stine’s best writing either you half hearted chucky knock off so there. 

Donald, told by Minnie his costume’s good tries to enter but since the ghosts interrupted the contest that’s not happening, Donald gets spooked, and that’s pretty much the segment. 

There is one bit though that hangs loose from the plot that’s so gloriously batshit I have to comment on it. For some reason Mickey decides to air the screen tests Hades did before he got his roll in Hercules. Which means Hades in a sci fi flick, his own sitcom where he does a murder on a kid and my favorite, him teaming up with 80′s icon mr. t for the hades team. 

The bit itself is just glorious with Mr. T making a crack about pitying fools with flames for hair and giving Hades just.. the biggest shit eating grin imaginable. I want a Disney+ Spinoff about these two yesterday, can you imagine the buddy cop shenanigans? Hades setting people on fire, Mr. T pitying fools, both of them riding jetskis directly at Poseidon. I’m just saying. Also it is the real Mr.T as himself, who showed up for exactly two lines for this very stupid gag which I can respect.

Overall a very good wraparound, not a lot of structure but the gang simply having halloween shenanigans, I didn’t even get to Daisy’s half assed costume of just mickey mouse ears or her hitting on the seven dwarves, is enough to drive the wraparound. Sometimes all you need is a good premise and the rest writes itself. Like that Hades and Mr. T spinoff. Seriously imagine Mr. T giving Hades and his wife Persephone marriage counseling.  If you woudln’t watch that, maybe your on the wrong blog.. or maybe i’m just kind of nuts and your perfectly fine. 

Onto the shorts:

Hansel and Gretel: 

A retelling of Hansel and Gretel with Mickey and Minnie....because making your offical couple brother and sister has never worked out poorly right Star Wars? 

Incest jokes aside, the short is awesome. Set to Danse Macabe it’s a fun retelling that follows all the beats you’d expect.. up until the oven where our heroes not only fall in themselves but have to fight the witch whose become some sort of fire elemental. It’s a damn cool climax. It’s worth a good watch and was likely picked for one of the halloween episodes because i’ts mildly spooky.  I don’t have a lot else to say really so enjoy this song from our musical guest.  Take it away Mr. T!

There is SO much to unpack here I don’t have time to unpack, from the fact his only complaint seems to be 

To the chorus of Moms he seemed to summon on command, to him talking about the pain he gave her in child birth.. actually that’s all I had to unpack. Guess I did have time for it. 

Pluto Fetches the Paper: UFO So normally from these Pluto fetches a paper bit I woudln’t have much to say. Pluto goes for the paper, shenanigans ensue. This time the shenanigans are MICKEY’S DOG PLUTO GETS ABUDCTED AND EXPERIMENTED ON BY ALIENS. 

Yes this actually happened. Pluto gets turned into various things from a paper and pin signing a contract to some sort of stegasaurs inflating dog monster. It’s utterly surreal and thus it’s probably the best Pluto short i’ve seen. The ending is even better. 

Mickey: took you a while pal. Any trouble? Pluto: I have seen horrors you cannot fathom.... things that cannot be unseen I have seen stars beyond measure and the sight of the earth in orbit. I have been to the inky black of space and surivived. I will never be the same. I am more than dog, more than mouse, I am.. god.  Mickey:... so yes then?

You know if more Pluto shorts dabbled in exestinal dread, i’d actually watch them without being paid to. 

How to Haunt A House: At this point it’s well documented how much I love these How To Shorts.  I love the snooty narrator, Goofy’s hyjinks... but this one may be my faviorite period. It’s just that good. The concept is clever, Goofy is killed for the short (The narrator even assuring him he’ll be fine after , having him killed JUST to make this short possible, giving him horrifying powers best not pondered. 

There’s just.. nothing but net here, as Goofy picks a house, picks a victim dating game style, of all refrences, and chooses Donald. Slash shippers, there’s your material. Get after it. And then proceeds to try and fail to haunt him , ending up getting Donald killed when he reveals himself, scarring the guy. So yeah that’s TWO beloved icons murdered for the sake of a joke and i’m here for it. This short is just amazing, It’s on youtube and i’m only being so breif because I feel it’s best experinced for yourself. it’s that funny, clever, and just plain fun. While combining my two faviorites of the sensational six plus pluto was guarnateed to make me love this, injecting Donald into the cartoon itself is clever, giving this short a feel the other How To’s don’t by pariing up this classic duo. It’s a great short and I highly recommend it. 

So while the Aspect Ratio on my copy sucked, this episode slaps and I highly reocmmend seeing it out. Easily one of the best HOM episodes i’ve encoutnered: Fun shorts, a great halloween feel, and some clever gags have earned it that designation. See you for Hades date in a few weeks and thanks for reading. 

[giggly-squiggily]

YEEES HOLY CRAP THAT LINE- and the beat of silence after Ody was all “With only one goal in mind” was so- AHH! The mental image of Hermes eating popcorn and clapping with that wild giggle of his is EVERYTHING 🤣🤣🤣

I’m not sorry for loving you had me crying almost immediately holy 😭 It was so beautiful!!! Sad as hell- but utterly gorgeous (REY- 😭😭😭💀 No cause seriously it’s Jikka-Eizen coded Jay is Hell’s Paradise fan confirmed! 🤣) The vocals for Charybdis were so good?!?! The way he sang the bridge- verse? I’m not musically informed but the “OH BRING IT ON!” Part it was so GOOD! 😭😭😭🙏🏻

THE POSEIDON SONGS!!! The vocals and screams and freaking NWNDNWNS SIX HUNDRED STRIKE AHH! 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 That ending left me jaw dropped and chilled- it was perfection. 💖💖💖😭😭😭

ME TOO HOLY- when he was “You’re gonna call off that storm” I said 👀 And then the sound of him picking up the Trident- 😍😍😍 I could scream about it for hours; this is by far my favorite saga yet! (I feel like I say that for each of them but seriously- this one rules so hard)

Rey girl love of my life dear comrade in arms the Vengeance Saga dropped how we feeling? I for one can’t stop blasting Dangerous over and over and now have an unhealthy obsession with Poseidon (I say that as if it wasn’t there already but shhh)

squiggily my sun and stars my sister in all but blood we are feeling sufficiently devastated and torn between crying and dancing

no fr IT'S SO GOOD I'M CRYING 😭😭 dangerous is such a bop, so glad to see hermes is still around and watching with a bag of popcorn ready to jump in whenever (also "i'm not the one who thought for you"- WHERRRE IS SHE)

but i love alllll the songs, not sorry for loving you rips my heart out every time (jikka singing this to eizen anyone??) and charybdis is so metal AND THE POSEIDON SONGS HOLY- they're so good i love this man so much, his screams in six hundred strike make me BAWL ❤️❤️😭😭

my actual reaction at the "you can't kill me" - "exactly" - *sword sounds*:

[xenodile]

Meanwhile, Poseidon’s buffs all just suck massive shit.  Oh boy I get to pinball enemies around, making it harder to AoE them down or control where they are.  And then his passives are crap like bonus damage during the first 10 seconds of an encounter, like that’s gonna make a meaningful difference in any fight.  Eat shit you stupid ocean bastard.

[jane-the-zombie]

A Wolf in Thief’s Clothing || Ariana (Megan?) & Jane

TIMING: Present

LOCATION: Store

PARTIES: @letsbenditlikebennett & @jane-the-zombie

SUMMARY: Jane runs into Ariana (Megan????) shoplifting at the store.

While impulse control had never been something Megan had been great at, most of her impulses at least didn’t drastically break any human laws. Sure, hunting seasons were a thing, but who the hell was going to tell a wolf they couldn’t eat a deer? That’s right, no one. Well, except maybe a beast hunter, but fuck most of them. The weird thoughts in her head that didn’t feel entirely like her own paired with the amount of stress she was under made it hard to ignore the temptation to shoplift. At first, she’d been a little appalled with herself, but now it was becoming a bit of a game. Their fridge was already full of steak and herring, so she decided to go for hair products today. She was in a crisis and the purple clearly had to go. The reminder that she wouldn’t ask Winston to do it because she wasn’t ready to see Rio yet stung as she looked over the hair colors. This time she’d go for a color she could actually see. Looking through the blues, she opted for the brightest looking one which was Poseidon by Arctic Fox. She still had a bleach kit at home, so she discreetly shoved the hair dye into the pocket of her leather jacket when she heard someone clear their throat behind her. Had she been that distracted? She whipped her head around to see Jane there. Shit. “Jane, hey, hi, how are you?” Smooth, Megan, smooth.

Jane had her hands on her hips as she stared at Ariana Bennett stuff the hair dye in her jacket. She had originally been planning on saying hi to the young woman, to check in, while she was here getting more salt (for French Fry) and nail polish remover (for herself) and yet… Shoplifting. They had all been there at one point or another. Jane herself had done it when she was a teenager, and Lizzie had done the same far past her teens - specifically from clothing stores. Jane plugged her ears and pretended not to listen as she described how to get magnet tags off swimsuits, before dutifully reminding her little sister that she was in fact a cop. Jane stood, looking at Ariana with the best disappointed face she could muster. How many blood bags can go missing this week before someone notices. Wait, what? Why did she keep having thoughts like that? Crap. Jane shook it off and let out a low sigh. “You want to hand me that hair dye, young lady?” She said, feeling like her father. Oh, weird. She hated that.

Eventually, Megan knew this whole shoplifting thing was going to catch up with her. She’d been trying to get whoever was in her head out, but it seemed to be of no use. At least it seemed to be a somewhat widespread thing and she wasn’t the only one experiencing it. Which hopefully meant it would get solved because she sure as hell didn’t know how to fix it. She was a fighter not a thinker. With a defeated sigh, she handed the hair dye to Jane. “Not really, I can just buy it. I don’t normally do this by the way.” She fidgeted nervously with her hair hoping she wasn’t going to get arrested this close to the full moon. “Kinda have someone else in my head right now, it’s a time and half.” She couldn’t stand still. “The full moon is tonight. Please don’t take me to the station.”

Ah yes. The wolves and their little moon problem. “Lucky for you, I happen to have better things to do than fill out the paperwork taking you in, Ariana,” she said, tucking the hair dye under her arm. Besides, none of the ‘scared straight’ crap worked anyway, and Jane wasn’t about to put Ariana through something that anyway - even without the moon problem. “C’mon, kid. Why don’t we go check out,” Jane said pointedly. She glanced at the blue hair dye. “This is a pretty color,” Jane commented as they started walking towards the self check out. “What sparked Teen Wolf Rebel? Is this some sort of moon thing?”

Megan’s eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. “Wait, who’s Ariana? I mean, thank you for not bringing me in.” Somehow, the adrenaline of being caught brought a satisfying thrill. Fuck, this was not the kind of mind state she needed to be in right now. She had actual problems to take care of. “Yeah, that’s a good idea. I do totally have money with me.” She relaxed a bit when she realized she wasn’t in any real trouble. Jane really was pretty great and she felt bad to have put her in an awkward situation. “Thanks, figured I’d go for a color I can actually see this go round,” she said trying to keep her tone calm. She shrugged and explained, “It’s definitely not a moon thing. I’ve got like… someone else’s thoughts in my head? With how much else I have going on right now, it’s hard to like just ignore whoever the fuck is in there. Apparently like it’s a thing that’s going around though so who knows. This town is wild.”

“Very funny,” Jane replied, looking at Ariana pointedly. “But I have more things to worry about than a little shoplifting…. That gets worse by mind crap.” Jane frowned when she realized that Ariana was having similar mind experiences. Thoughts of hunters and people and blood kept filling her mind, and she was certain that Harsh wasn’t human. He had to be a zombie. Jane shook her head, pushing her hair out of her face as they approached the self check-out line. “I’m actually experiencing something similar. Wouldn’t be fair to bring you in over something like that.” Supernatural related. Her stomach twisted and she let out a low sigh. Supernatural and law didn’t go together, and Jane was still trying to work out what her place was in everything. She glanced at Ariana. The poor girl was so young to be dealing with so much, especially with her sister’s death let alone organ trafficking. Something stirred inside her, and she wasn’t sure what it was. “Let me spot you on the hair dye, hm? And then we can go talk, if you want.”

“I wasn’t joking,” Megan explained as she looked at Jane some incredulously. She didn’t know what her real name, but it definitely wasn’t Ariana. “That makes sense considering well… literally everything that happens in this town.” It wasn’t exactly comforting to know Jane was going through the same thing. While the previous town-wide problems had been taken care of, it always still left her feeling there were things far too powerful for any of them to face. It only further cemented the idea that they needed to stick together. She refused to lose someone else she cared for. “I don’t love that you have someone in your head, too, but I guess there’s not much we can do about it. Trying to see if any of my spellcasting friends know more.” Magic was something that both intrigued and frightened her to an extent, but she trusted the spellcasters she knew. Megan smiled brightly when Jane offered to get the hair dye for her. It wasn’t necessary, but Jane caring and helping was always welcome though she wasn’t too excited to talk about an organ selling ring of all things. “Thanks, Jane. And yeah, we probably should talk. I wish it was better news” She followed her to the checkout counter and offered another thank you as Jane paid for her hair dye. As they made their way out, Megan pointed out a little bench not far off that seemed private enough. “How about here,” she asked.

“What’s your name then, if it isn’t Ariana? Malory?” Jane replied, sarcastically. Kids sure were funny these days, with their memes and their tiktoks “Does everyone in this town have spellcasting friends?” Jane asked, though she wasn’t sure she would call Otto and herself friends. He was more a big thorne in her side. A pain in the ass. She shook her head, running a hand through her hair as they entered self check out. For good measure, Jane grabbed a couple bottles of water and a small bag of potato chips to go along with the hair dye. She could come back for her salt and nail polish remover some other time. She bagged the items, handing Ariana the bag with the hair dye, and walked out with her. “That’ll be fine enough, I think. As they sat down, Jane reached into the bag and handed her one of the bottles of water. She leaned against her knees looking over at Ariana. It was hard - Jane didn’t typically like kids, and she definitely didn’t like interacting with them - though, Ariana was eighteen, and that definitely wasn’t a ‘child’ anymore. Back in Portland, her old partner had always been the one to deal with the child witnesses. But Ariana was so young and had been through so much, and she didn’t have anyone here anymore… Something about that tugged on Jane’s heartstrings. Ugh. “You can start anywhere you want, okay?” Jane told her. “Even if it’s not about what you told me before online.”

“I don’t actually know because my name was stolen, but Ariana doesn’t sound right. You can call me Megan until I get my real name back,” Megan explained even though she realized Jane didn’t quite believe her. It did sound pretty wild if you didn’t know about the supernatural. Hell, she knew about the supernatural and she was shocked to learn that fae could just yoink your name. She shrugged, “I mean, the fellow supernatural folks probably. Humans, I couldn’t tell you. They probably wouldn’t know if they did.” She noted that Jane picked up some chips and waters for them which was a much nicer reaction to being caught shoplifting by an actual cop than she would have ever expected, but she guessed it wasn’t that surprising. In the short time she’d known Jane, she’d always been nothing but kind and understanding to her. It was a warm feeling that reminded her of why she was continuing to push through these days that seemed to grow more and more exhausting. She happily took the bag with the blue hair dye and noted she’d need to message Winston for further hair help. It seemed to be their thing now. “Thanks, Jane,” she said as they walked outside and took a seat on a lone bench. She leaned back and made herself comfortable. She let out a soft sigh, “That’s a tough one… because I don’t want to get the person who’s literally being threatened to do said harvesting in trouble, but I do have a name and was promised more. Kind of started with me sticking my nose literally where it doesn’t belong because I smelled dead werewolves, but apparently it’s not just werewolf organs… ours just happen to be more valuable which like ugh.”

Megan. Jane’s brows furrowed. Name stealing? Not for the first time, Jane thought that White Crest was the bad place. “Megan… got it.” Somehow, Jane didn’t think it would be all that helpful to tell her that Ariana’s - er, Megan’s name was actually Ariana. Something about that whole nonsense made her think that no matter what she said to Megan, she wouldn’t believe her. Jane glanced at her, leaning on her knees as she stared at the young woman. She had her whole life ahead of her, and she didn’t deserve half the crap that was on her shoulders. Jane could at least help take the burden off her shoulders - that was her job, wasn’t it? The whole reason she wanted this job to begin with. Maybe not here in White Crest, but it was still the same. What was an eighteen year old girl doing dealing with organ trafficking? Jane shook her head. “Aria - Megan, I want you to know that I’m going to do everything I can to help you. I know you don’t want to get anyone in trouble, and I’m not going to push for you to tell me who’s harvesting the organs, but I’d like to be able to help them too.” Especially if they were being threatened. “So think about it for me, at least a little.” Jane considered where to go from there, for just a moment, before she sat up a little straighter and looked at her. “But, for now, let’s start with that name.”

[valdez-and-the-argo-crew]

God!Percy fic chapter 2

Previous chapter: https://valdez-and-the-argo-crew.tumblr.com/post/190161565556/godpercy-fic-chapter-1

I woke up to the shimmering form of Annabeth standing at the foot of my bed.

“Di imortales!” I exclaimed, sitting up and pulling a shirt on.

“Rise and shine, Seaweed Brain.” She laughed. She looked more mature than I remember, although that might be because I still remember her as a 16 year old, rather than a 26 year old.

“A little warning would be great, you can’t just Iris message me out of nowhere when you know full well I’m trying to get my beauty sleep.” I pouted.

“Percy it’s like noon where you are, don’t you have like, camp duties to do?” She asked.

“Yeah probably but I haven’t slept in a hot minute, god stuff ya know? Anyways...” I shrugged. “Why are you calling?”

“I just wanted you to know that I’m on my way over, Grover and I left Camp Jupiter yesterday. Had to stop so my pegasus could rest, but we’ll be there probably late afternoon, maybe early evening.” She said.

“Alright cool!” I smiled wide. I hadn’t seen Annabeth in person since the winter solstice, so it was good to finally be seeing her.

The iris message vision started to flicker and fade slowly. It made me kinda sad because now that I’m talking to her, it made me realize just how much I miss her.

“I got to go, but I’ll see you then, Aquaman.” She laughed.

I rolled my eyes at the nickname. “Whatever you say Wise girl.”

She laughed and shook her head as the message faded to almost nothing. “Oh! By the way...you still drool when you sleep.”

With that, the Iris Message faded away completely and I was alone again, but this time with something to look foreword to.

With a very dramatic sigh, I rolled out of bed and grabbed one of my many orange shirts and tugged it over my head. I looked in the mirror I hung over my bed, and noticed my hair was an absolute disaster.

I used my Very Impressive Godly Powers to fix it, since that took absolutely no effort. Theoretically I could look however I wanted, but I chose to look like regular me aging at a regular pace. So basically I look not a day over 25.

After I finish getting ready, I grab riptide off my night stand and I head out the door to the arena. Nothing like a little sword practice in the morning to get me amped up.

I dragged out a training dummy from the shed and start hacking away at it.

I practiced on the dummy until any mortal would’ve been exhausted, but of course I hadn’t broken a sweat. I capped riptide and put the dummy back just as the conch sounded for lunch.

I wasn’t hungry but I walked to the dining hall anyways, sitting at the head table next to Chiron. I grabbed a square of ambrosia and took a bite, washing it down with nectar. Being a god had its perks, like being able to have ambrosia without consequences.

“Afternoon, Percy,” Chiron smiled warmly.

I acknowledged his greeting with a nod as I had more ambrosia.

“Always the appetite,” Chiron chuckled as I finished.

“Hey, don’t judge me I can do what I want.” I laughed. I looked out to all the campers eating and talking at the tables. There were even more campers than yesterday, since more campers keep flooding in. Most of them were claimed right as they crossed past Thalia’s tree, but a few joined Jamie in the Hermes cabin.

Speaking of Jamie, I noticed he looked left out. He was picking at his lunch and hardly talking. I frowned and got up.

“I’ll be back,” I told Chiron, walking away from the head table and over to Jamie. He noticeably perked up when he saw me.

“Percy!” He smiled widely.

“Hey buddy,” I said, standing behind him. I looked at Jacob. “Is there room for me to sit?”

“There’s plenty of room.” He smiled and gestured for me to sit.

I squeezed in next to Jamie, who, once again clung to my arm. He stopped picking at his food and started eating.

I wondered why it was, that Jamie found so much comfort in me, that allowed him to open up. He kept shoveling food down his face, until he finally washed it down with the apple juice in his goblet.

Soon lunch was over. Afternoon activities began, but I went down to the ocean to think. I stepped into the water and walked until my head was all the way under.

As always, I felt calmer here. I felt safer and protected. Thanks dad.

I looked at the passing fish, talking to a few of them as they pass by. Fish aren’t usually very intelligent so it was mostly one sided.

I tread further into the water, the silt and sand in the water swirling around my arms and legs as I walked.

It was silent down here. The only sound was the gentle waves lapping above in a mesmerizing rhythm. The pull of the undertow dragged me farther out, and I obliged, following the current out to sea.

I held out my hands and willed my godly power to flow through my hands and to the water in front of me. I created air bubbles and manipulated the water, just having a bit of fun. I’d never really had a chance to do this before, even though I could’ve done exactly what I’m doing now countless times.

When Zeus told me I was going to be assigned to camp half blood for a while, he took away some of my powers, sort of like a parental control lock (or in this case, divine uncle lock). He said that if I was to be the first god campers interacted with, I shouldn’t have all my powers, because Zeus doesn’t trust me not to loose control. I can’t even tell which camper has which god as a parent, which is unfortunate, because I could’ve helped Jamie.

I focused back on the water, willing it to become a violent raging whirlpool for about a minute, before calming it down again.

What else could I do with my powers?

I didn’t have my own domain like my dad or any of the Big Gods, so as far as I could tell my powers were just my regular Son Of Poseidon powers...but I felt more powerful.

I walked farther into the water and created little ripples of water all around me. I was like Elsa, but less ice-princess-y and more lame-god-playing-around-underwater.

Just for laughs, I made a snowman out of sand, but it quickly fell apart. I laughed and sent a wave over where it had been to dispel the sand.

I created a few more waves just to see if I could. Each one was bigger than the next, though they always fell away before reaching the shore.

I felt free. I miss being able to harness the water while fighting some giant big bad evil person or monster. But quests are reserved for demigods. Maybe I’ll go off and slay some monsters for fun.

I willed a giant wave to form. The kind that knocks you under and spins you around and you’re left directionless with salt water in your nose and mouth. I wasn’t going to let the wave loose, I just wanted to see how big and dangerous I could make a wave.

But a dumb fish distracted me and caused me to let go of the wave, causing it to head directly for Camp Half Blood.

Crap.

That wave was like 10 feet tall and fast moving.

I propelled myself foreword in the water, trying to catch up with the wave. I could tell people at camp had already noticed it, and had started to take cover.

I broke through the wave and ran to the shore, yelling at a few stray campers to get out of my way. I finally got to a good enough distance away and turned around, my hands extended, willing the wave to break apart.

The wave wasn’t listening.

It barreled towards me and the few campers who weren’t smart enough to scram.

“STOP!” I yelled at the wave, using every ounce of power I had to break the wave.

Still nothing.

I started to panic. I’d created a tidal wave that was about to destroy part of camp.

I closed my eyes and braced for the wave to hit, but it never came. Instead came the last voice I’d expected to hear.

“You have an explanation for this?”

I opened my eyes and saw a middle aged guy in a Hawaiian shirt. My dad. He didn’t look happy.

I was about to start talking but Chiron walked over, arms crossed and disappointment evident. I feel like I’m back at a parent teacher conference.

“My bad?” I said with a weak laugh.

“Percy you sent a tidal wave at your camp.” My father scolded. “Why were you making tidal waves?”

“I was just bored.” I mumbled, looking down at the sand.

“My boy, when you’re bored, you make sand castles, you talk to the local fish, you don’t destroy your camp.” Poseidon said firmly.

“I know. I’m sorry.” I said, trying to look him in the eye.

I noticed a few campers starting to gather around, including Jamie.

“Perhaps we’d better take this to thenBig House,” Chiron suggested.

“I agree, though I can’t stay for long.” Poseidon nodded. Chiron and I walked to the Big House while Poseidon just teleported.

Inside, I sat on a couch, trying to take the glare of the god and centaur who were currently mad at me. It wasn’t easy.

“Tell us again what happened, Percy.” Chiron looked at me.

“I just wanted to have a little fun, and to see what I can do.” I explained.

“But you’re smart enough to know what you’re doing. Why the tidal wave?” Poseidon crossed his arms.

“I promise I never meant to send it towards camp. I was going to make the wave go away after I finished forming it but some little minnow distracted me.” I said.

“What I want to know is why you were making a wave that big.” Chiron looked at me for an answer.

I shrugged and sighed. “I miss the adrenaline of a fight, one where I can just call upon everything I have and take down a monster with my power and sword. I’ve just been here for 10 years with nothing to do.”

“But you happily agreed to train sword fighting,” Chiron said.

“And I love it, but it’s not enough. I want to just battle monsters...but all the quests go to the demigods.”

“Percy, you will have plenty of time in your life to experience fighting with all your strength. The next time a great prophecy is issued, I know we gods will have to get involved.” Poseidon said. “Be patient my son. And try to contain yourself, okay?”

“I know, I really am sorry.” I said sincerely.

A moment of uncomfortable silence passed between the three of us.

“Right, well I’d best be headed back to my kingdom. It was good to see both of you.” Poseidon smiled, going back to his usual warm demeanor.

“We can see you out,” Chiron said, opening the door for my dad and me.

To my surprise, someone was leaning against the porch railing, polishing her dagger absentmindedly. Just the sight of her made me completely forget about what had happened.

“Annabeth!” I smiled wide and ran forward to give her a hug. “Where’s Grover?”

“In the woods with Juniper. Talked about her the whole way back.” She laughed, and then noticed my dad behind me.

“Lord Poseidon...? What brings you here?” Annabeth asked, looking between him and Chiron. Great, my dad is going to humiliate me in front of my best friend.

“Oh nothing, there was just a mishap off the sound so I came here to assure everything was alright. Percy can tell you about it later.”

Annabeth raised an eyebrow, turning her head towards me. I felt myself go red so I looked away.

“Anyways, it’s good to see you seaweed brain.” Annabeth smiled.

“You too, Owl head,” I quipped back. “We were just gonna walk back to the shore. Come with?”

“I see no reason not to.” She shrugged. The four of us started walking back to the beach. We were almost there when Poseidon paused.

“While I’m here, I suppose there is one thing I need to do.” He said and turned to look at the crowd of campers that were following us. He pointed right at Jamie, and I knew what he was going to say in an instant. I can’t believe I didn’t see it before.

Annabeth noticed too. I could see out of the corner of my eye that she was looking between me, Jamie and Poseidon.

The jet black, windswept hair, the sea green eyes, the fierce expression and inquisitive smile, and even though my skin tone was slightly darker than his, we both had the same beach-y tan look...

“Jamie Reed,” Poseidon smiled and beckoned him forward. “It’s nice to meet you, my son.”

A collective gasp arose from the campers who had tethered around. Poseidon put his hand on Jamie’s shoulder and a sea green trident lit up above Jamie’s head. The little boy was awe struck.

Chiron stepped forward. “All hail Jamie Reed, brother to Percy, and Son of the ocean, the earth shaker; Poseidon”

[ussthunderquack]

Merfolk AU

Natasha Romanoff: A classic siren. Lures men to their deaths, often ripping out their hearts and eating them. She feels guilt for her bloody past, and now focuses on saving innocent humans from drowning, and only rips hearts out of vicious pirates and assholes who deserve it. 

Valkyrie: Similarly, a professional siren who lures men to their doom. But her heart hasn’t been in it for a while. It’s just a job for her. She mainly keeps doing it so she can loot rum from the pirate ships she totals. 

Gamora: No interest in the usual siren-crap. She just wants to defeat the evil sea-king Thanos.

Nebula: Blue-skinned, fin-headed mermaid. Much more hostile towards the humans (and everyone) than her adopted sister. 

Mantis: A siren of the innocent and largely clueless variety. She lures sailors and puts them to sleep with her empathic powers, and drags them to the bottom of the ocean because she doesn’t understand that they can’t breathe underwater. 8\

Shuri: The mermaid with all the shells and pearls and crab claws and whatnot woven into heir hair. Often carries enchanted magic-blasting fish skulls on her hands. Like Skuttle, fancies herself an expert on the humans, but gets a few things hilariously wrong. 

Tony Stark: Flamboyant red and gold lionfish merman, with a glowing blue sand dollar fused into his chest to keep poisonous puffer-fish ink away from his heart.

Used to take pride in the storms he conjured, until he realized how many innocent humans were getting harmed by them. Then he devoted himself to saving humans from drowning, and, bing a diva, revealed himself to the land-lovers, basking in the adoration of the bedazzled humans. 

Wanda Maximoff: the Scarlet Siren. Her parents were killed by human mer-hunters, and she blames Tony Stark for revealing himself, and thus, the existence of merfolk. 

She conducts the waves and wind with her hands, and drives sailors mad with illusions of their worst fears, as she drowns them. 

Pietro Maximoff: He swims really fast. 

Thor: A rare mer-man who excels at conjuring lightning storms on the sea. Carries a tridant that only he is worthy to lift. 

Falls in love with a human woman named Jane, but she isn’t willing to trade her legs for fins to be with him. She eventually breaks up with him. He gains some weight, and hangs out on the beach with his big Poseidon-beard and sunglasses, drinking beer. 

Loki: Powerful seawitch. Er, sea-warlock. Male siren, male sea-witch. Illusions, transformations, destruction, glam, he does everything your typical siren seawitch does, but better. Or anyway he thinks. 

Ava Starr: Sea nymph/Sister of the Air. Once a regular mermaid, she died trying to save her parents. Because of her heroic sacrifice, she did not entirely dissolve into seafoam, as most dead merfolk do. Instead, she became a Sister of the Air, a mer-spirit who can alternate between solid, wind and liquid form. 

Steve Rogers: The Siren of Disappointment. After you’ve stupidly attempted to cut corners by sailing through a hurricane, or go through siren-infested waters with cotton in your ears (because you forgot that it’s less the singing that lures men and more the boobies), as you drown, he will appear, with his blue tail and merman beard, holding a giant sand dollar shield with a starfish in the center, and the last thing you will hear is his song: 

“SO.... you tried sailing through a hurricane. You weren’t patient. And now, all you have is disappointment....” 

T’Challa: King of the most powerful undersea kingdom, that still remains a secret from the humans. Black tail that glows with purple patterns in the dark, wears a necklace of sealion tusks. Can transform into an all-black killer whale.

Nakia: Mermaid who has visited surfaces all around the world, is fascinated by the land-lovers, and wishes her King would allow his people to reveal themselves to the humans as well. 

Bucky Barnes: One arm is a shiny plated crab-like appendage with a claw at the end. He wears a red starfish on the shoulder. 

Carol Danvers: A mermaid transformed into a human and given amnesia. Eventually rediscovers her fishy origins, and unlocks her weather-related powers.

Bruce Banner: Alternates between a docile merman and a giant green hammerhead shark. 

The only humans he’s comfortable around are the Beatles, who he once met as a child when they sailed through his sea in their Yellow Submarine.  

Stephen Strange: Bright red and blue stingray merman, and the most powerful sorcerer in the seven seas. 

The Ancient One: Not all mermaids need long pretty hair. This one taught Strange everything he knows. 

Thaddeus Ross: Mer-walrus 

Clint Barton: Foul hunter. Humans have fishermen, and merfolk have bow hunters who swim to the surface and shoot down seagulls and other tasty treats. 

Scott Lang: He’s a minnow-merman chillaxing in your martini, or the giant Poseidon crashing up from the waves who everyone on the boat is trying to snap pics of on their phone  

Hope Van Dyne: Flying-fish mermaid. 

Olivia Octavius: Octo-mermaid with neon-green tentacles 

Storm: Just another white-haired, white-eyed, mermaid controlling the weather. 

[shy-magpie]

RQG 146

[Author’s note: Sorry about the long break! I caught a bug and haven’t been able to edit for love or money. I have been writing the live blogs as the episodes come out but I suspect I will have to edit the stuffing out of them to get something that is both coherent and not twice as long as the show. Also I’m going to try to remember to toss a cut at the top of these things so it doesn’t take up so much of the dash etc.]

I love when they go auctioneer because they want to get to the content faster. Ooh reminder that the party have slightly conflicting goals. I almost spaced that Zolf's priority is the info to save the world while Cel is more narrowly focused on taking out the threat to their village. 

Final bets on whether: 1) the timelines are simultaneous 2) its the same room 3) who(or what) is in the chair ~Hamid time~ Another stealth check and I think Alex rolled something secret. I love these nerds, I don't think they even noticed they slipped into the more precise language of math to describe the place, always makes me feel trusted when people don't hide that kind of thing. Bulk head doors are a good sign. Alex might be trying to build up to it but Bryn wants to get a description of the figure in the chair as badly as we do if not more. Full blank-masked male, cables from the chair to the organ. Ben, sweetie, we aren't going to shoot-first-ask-questions-later, or even take that as your serious suggestion moments after you reminded us Zolf is aiming for capture. "Could be another one of the dead bodies" Pardon me while I glitch on the idea that it being another member of the doomed party is the only thing that I can't recall being proposed over the last week. Am I forgetting or did Figgis actually come up as a suggestion but not that? Alex adds a ladder, to save Hamid one of his last spells "Tension, tension, tension" I can't parse how many of them are chanting but who ever that is, know I adore you. I should be vibrating from stress and instead I'm grinning like a fool. Thats my boy! Hamid's spell slots might be running scary low but his mind is sharp as ever, he remembers his potions! Oh dangerous game, but the extra time invisible as he gets closer sounds worth it. Picked up a few things from Sasha. "Think" Alex is actively trolling. The lights are bad? You choose to do that, Alex, put away the "victim of circumstances" tone. Oh the organ! I needed a better description of that. Lydia might be the only one who loves this description more than me. A pipe organ that makes potions instead of music? Bryn has heard of one where each key is an alchemical symbol. I might need to hunt down art for that if its a known pathfinder thing. Hamid recognizes it but is the wrong school to understand this, both by training as a wizard and as sorcerer. The pipes are actually full of various fluids and powders. Yes Cel needs to see this. Thank you Helen! How much money has he spent on this? Where is he getting the money? I need that clipped! (tension chant evolved) Oh hell of a bet Hamid Sasha would be proud. The table is so proud of him. FTR I think that was Ben not Bryn saying "I stroke his cheek", because Bryn wouldn't risk Alex making that joke canon and using it to hurt Hamid. (naturally there was such no risk if Ben made that joke) Cable to the back of the neck, in clerical robes (crap I remember a “Shoin the healer painting”(?) but I thought he was an alchemist? Is this an assistant? Mini boss? Or is he multi classing), a party mask? Back to that theme. Its a prop corpse and its not the same room, I'm going to scream. Hamid don't you dare! Dollars to donuts its going to stand up and be some kind of creepy corpse robot Hamid waves Skraak in Speaker time, Shoin sounds worse maybe off script. ~~party time~~ Oh Cel has to lose most of the beast voice. Never mind! Smaller pencils acquired! I love this description even better the second time around. Oh bless Lydia for giving the fuller description. 55 HP! 14 Con! Comfort beard. Ooh Azu has a potion to make her even further stronger than Zolf. (iirc she had 1 point over him already) Yes he is in fact lawful evil and no he doesn't ever let them rest. Wise Cel/Lydia! I love Azu's auras! Aura of courage sounds especially useful. Yes yes Azu is good, brave, and resolute. Oh poor Zolf can't prep without either sleep or knowing for sure the fight is coming. Cel actually has 59 HP thank goodness! Another hall? Its circling the dome Hamid is in. It better be the same dome! I feel a bit like I'm betraying the party to enjoy the set design when the set is designed to kill them. They go as fast as they can while checking for traps. I refuse to parse that any other way. Oh poor Alex, we appreciate the set design even if the characters don't. Next door has a porthole to look through. Bless Helen/Azu for reminding them to check for traps. Cel can still disable it! It was a hand buzzer? Oh, to waste spells. Missed an in laid wood image of Shoin as a saint. This guy has too much ego and money. Anyone else thinking of that old joke where a guy has to become a monk to be allowed to find out what is behind a ridiculous number of doors and the punchline is you have to become a monk to find out what he saw? Ok it is a good thing its not the right door ~Hamid time~

Alex you troll! I refuse to concede we needed something to bleed to the stress levels. Shoin’s voice officially probably not a pre recording. I love Hamid! Hangs a handkerchief over the corpse's eyes. Poseidon? Couldn't be any god other than Zolf's ex? Ok doesn't seem in good enough shape to be a necrobot, but the organ might change that. Metal chairs sized for the party bolted to floor. I think Hamid is officially having fun not following Shoin's suggestion to sit at the table. Look at the leader in him collecting the paperwork Official connection between blue veins and the simulacrum! Also a spot for the power source Liliana was working on? Red string joke! ~break~ He Acid Blasts a speaker and it pisses Shoin off. Yeah "young man" was exact wrong thing to try. Were you trying to hit his daddy issues? I love one troll and 1 Kobold! Minion this! If Hamid speaks up? Shoin’s sense are fallible, might come up later Hamid is the best! Might die of being the best, but if he has to go its fingers up. Halfling, Dragon and troll, not a damn inch of leverage except what he gets Shoin to give him by refusing to follow orders. Pretending to attempt to comply is so much more frustrating (and better listening) than if he simply went "shan't". The party comes in! A swear! Not really another way to put it. The corpse explodes! Is Shoin the organ itself? A hug! A Cel & Hamid hug! Zolf backs Hamid's play, and  joins in Shoin baiting. Hamid hugs Azu and Zolf! Finally a proper Zolf hug! Cel finally gets to check out the organ. It prioritizes looks over efficiency and isn't just a potion maker. Some of it goes over Cel's head. Cel blocks the outlet. Lydia still thinks slightly sideways like me, and I love it. The cylinders are near boiling. Hamid orders Skraak to safety! Cel tries to hug Skraak, but Skraak doesn't recognize them. Poor brave little guy tried to attack before they can explain. Cel takes chatty!Skraak well and they have another little bonding growl exchange. They get ready to skip Shoin's game and go to the next room. Bad sounds. Fist sized drops of luminous green liquid from the top of the room that don't act right. Zolf attempts open the door to the next room, Hamid sprints towards it. Thank goodness someone wants to live. Natural 1? But its initiative, so that shouldn't hurt too badly right? Right? No effect thank goodness Homing blobs? I am torn exactly between that being cool and not something I want the party to deal with. How many fire balls does Hamid have left? I think Cel is out of bombs, and if we remember nothing else from Kew its that swarms require explosions. Zolf! Its the big brother of the buzzer door and is locked to boot. Azu attacks the goo nearest Zolf. Helen is too wound up to remember how to roll. Bryn and Ben couch her through it in that RQ way. Cleave! More blobs and the existing ones move towards people. Magic missile! 4 pews! 2 at the nearest to him, 2 at the one nearest Cel. I'd say squishy solidarity but Cel is pretty tough for once. Cel shoots the nearest 3? Then flies up 10 feet up and towards Skraak. Zolf blesses the party! Fair Alex! Not everything has to have a mechanical effect. Azu attacks again. It explodes, if Azu hits it it will die.  At least one person should be safe. Skraak! He froze! Worth a shot Ben You'll see? It tries to blob Skraak and isn't big enough to hurt them. Is Skraak safe from collateral damage? Hamid and Cel both protect Skraak. Hamid tells Skraak to use his spear, Skraak runs instead. Thank god he might not die trying to be a hero. Something drains into the pipe organ and the pipe organ attacks! OMG it is a 50ft tall brain soup drinking electric monster! Yes Ben! Perfect! Shoin Mr Ceiling-ed himself theory has player buy in! Bye! Also I will eat my hat if the drop blobs aren't able to merge into something more dangerous.

[itsshortfurball20]

Percy Jackson, The Avenger

A/N: This is already posted on Ao3 and ff.net but figured I’d post it here as well. Enjoy.

Summary: Percy has an encounter with Nick Fury. A year later, he’s being called on to help protect the world… again. He’s not alone in this Avengers Initiative. A genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist; a super soldier; a green scientist; a Norse god; and two secret agents. What could go wrong?

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson nor Marvel (Just wish I did)

This is unedited.

This chapter has 3,032 words

1 – The Pegasus wants a Donut

The week had been a long one for Fury and it wasn’t showing any signs of stopping. Even the week after the incident in Budapest hadn’t been this tiring. Just within the span of a few days, the director of SHIELD was dealing with unmovable hammers falling into deserts, General Ross pestering him about the manhunt for scientist-turned-fugitive Bruce Banner, and dealing with Tony Stark who was just being… Tony.

And then he got the call about the horse.

“You’re telling me that you saw a horse flying around the base?”

“Yessir,” the agent said on the other side of the phone. “At first, we thought it was some type of missile, but it moved too fast. Once I figured out what it was, I ordered for it to be tranquilized and brought to the labs.”

Fury pushed aside the paperwork he had been working on and picked up a file that he had been the topic of many debates with the World Council recently. Project P.E.G.A.S.U.S. He knew a flying horse was called a Pegasus from Greek mythology. Was this some kind of sign for them to go ahead with the project? A warning to stop?

“Give me the lab number.”

Fury knew that whatever this was, it was just the beginning.

\~*~/

Percy silently cursed Blackjack down to Tartarus and back. He’d had a demigod dream of the pegasus getting captured, prompting the demigod to go and rescue him in the middle of finals week. Not that he wasn’t glad for the excuse to get away from the mind-numbing hours of sitting around and studying, testing, and eating too many snacks and not enough meals, but this wasn’t the break he was looking for.

He was outside a huge, government-looking facility. The building was big, with a guard monitoring the gate that allowed people in and out. It had been hard to find. The place was in the middle of nowhere, with only a single road leading up to it. Surrounded by a forest and hills on all sides, the only way in or out undetected was through the sky.

Schist.

He wished desperately that Annabeth was with him to help him come up with a clever plan to get in, but she was too busy taking tests this week for her to accompany him. And now Percy was glad that she didn’t come. On the high chance that something went wrong, she wouldn’t get dragged down too.

Percy fiddled with the pen in his pocket. Several ideas were racing through his head. He could always crawl through the vents, spy style. Or come up with some kind of lie that would get him into the building. The son of Poseidon wished he could shadow-travel like Nico, or that he could have Mrs. O’Leary jump him in there, but Percy figured that having a hellhound larger than a tank appearing out of nowhere might cause some trouble, even if the mist made her look like—

A new idea hit Percy like one of Tyson’s hugs.

There were several things that were missing, like what he would do once he got in, if he got in, but it was the best plan he had and would manage to come up with. Now all he needed was a car.

\~*~/

Fury thought he had seen everything. He should've known better, working in this line of work, that even when you thought you've seen everything, there was something new lurking around the corner.

Including a horse with wings.

The pegasus seemed relatively unharmed. One of its wings was folded over its stomach, which rose and fell steadily. The other was spread out behind it, showing its massive wingspan.

Fury stood behind a glass panel staring at the sedated equestrian while scientists ran around, prepping blood tests and taking DNA samples. He motioned over the head scientist.

"Give me a full report."

"Well we, uh, we, um..." She fumbled over her words.

"Get to it."

"We don't know. All tests so far have been inconclusive. No one knows what it is. It isn't a horse or bird—the DNA doesn't match. It's its own breed."

"It's a pegasus." Fury told her.

“Well, yes. But the thing is, pegasus don’t exist.” She started explaining.” Their fairytales, myths, something you tell your kid in their bedtime stories. Nothing before today has shown any indication of the existence of a pegasus species so for one to just pop up out of the blue… it has to be the result of experimentation, but nothing is adding up.”

Fury watched the pegasus. "So you mean that no one can tell me anything about it?"

“No sir, but we're working hard on it." She amended. "We'll have results by the end of the day."

"I want them in an hour."

He gave one last look to the pegasus before leaving the lab, not seeing the stressed face of the scientist.

\~*~/

If anyone were to ask Percy, the official story was that he got in, got Blackjack, and got out without a hitch.

He wished it had happened like that.

Things started off smooth. He'd gotten the car and driven his way up to the road, wondering the entire time if his idea would work or if he’d get hauled away. There was only one way to find out.

He approached the gate, rolling his window down. Percy tried to look confident. The guard eyed him warily. “How can I help you?”

Percy had never really used the Mist before, but he figured he could wing it. He looked the man in the eyes, focused really hard (he hoped he didn’t look like he was about to fart), and snapped his fingers—making a loud, clear snap. Mustering his most confident voice, he told the guard, “I forgot my key card. You will let me in and not tell anyone about me.”

There was a tense second where Percy was sure that the man was about to haul him away, but then a calm expression settled over his face and he pressed a button. A second later, the gate rolled open. He contained his jump of joy and instead nodded at the guard and drove off.

Percy felt a little bit of relief. Using the mist had been a bit of a wild card, the last time having used it, it didn’t work. But that was just the first part, he reminded himself as he saw people dressed in suits and business outfits. He felt underdressed in his Camp Half-Blood shirt and jeans.

It was after he snuck in through the maintenance door that things started getting rough. The building looked bigger on the inside than it had on the outside. Before him laid a maze of halls, designed to trap anyone who didn’t know their way around (maybe not literally but either way it felt like an attack on Percy). Somewhere inside the mortal version of the Labyrinth was Blackjack, alone, probably scared, and most likely wanting a donut.

And Percy had to find him.

\~*~/

It wasn’t too long after Percy had set off in the building that Fury became aware of the intruder. Video feeds showed a young man manipulating the guard at the front gate to let him pass. After talking to the guard who had no memory of the incident, Fury ordered for the man to be brought to him so he could interrogate him.

Percy couldn’t tell something was off. He was wondering the halls, searching for Lab 28 where he had figured out a knocked-out Blackjack had been brought to. It made him furious to think that his pegasus was being used as some sort of lab rat.

He was in the right area, if the BLA sign had been any indication (and that’s all science sounded like to him anyway—bla, bla, bla).

I can’t believe they gave me this horse crap. A faint voice entered Percy’s head. I need sugar cubes at the least.

Blackjack? Percy tried reaching out. Blackjack? Can you hear me?

Boss?

Definitely Blackjack.

Blackjack, thank the gods. Stay put, I’m coming to get you.

 Thanks boss. I couldn’t’ve moved anyway. They have me tied to a table. They also gave me this stupid hay that horses eat. Can you believe that?

 Percy followed Blackjack’s voice as a homing beacon. It got steadily louder and louder.

Blackjack, you look like a horse. You are part horse.

You wouldn’t happen to have donuts with you, would you?

The son of Poseidon opened a door. Blackjack looked over at him, kneeling on the floor.

No donuts, I see.

“This is a rescue mission,” Percy told him as he moved to free the pegasus from his restraints. “Why would I bring donuts with me?”

Percy got the first latch undone and started working on the second one.

Maybe we can get some later then.

“Sure. Later. After we get out of here. I almost got you. Just another minute and—”

Behind you!

Blackjack had shouted the words too late. Something hit his back, causing a burning sensation to flow through him. He fell to the floor with a thud and was unable to move. Percy could see Blackjack struggling to get his attacker, but he couldn’t hear him or anything else. His own heartbeat was too loud. The last thing he saw was a pair of boots stepping in front of him before his head fell to the floor and the world faded to black.

He couldn’t tell how long he had been out, but judging from his stiff shoulders and the small ache in his neck, it had probably been a good while. Percy tried to make himself as comfortable as possible. His hands had been cuffed to the table, which didn’t surprise Percy, but the addition of gloves did.

It wasn’t much longer before the door opened and a man walked in and hold up. The first thing Percy noticed was the spy/pirate-ish look—a black trench coat, don’t-mess-with-me attitude, and, as the final touch, an eye patch. Percy hoped that the man knew Halloween had happened seven months ago.

“Mr. Jackson,” the man said in a way that made him hate the name almost as much as when monsters called him Perseus. “I must say, it was a surprise when I was alerted that someone had broken into a facility more secure than the White House.”

Percy swallowed uncomfortably. “You might want to update your security.”

“We will. And this time, we’ll take into account mind control.” The demigod frowned in confusion. He couldn’t mind control peo… the mist. Looking down at his gloves, he realized that these people thought that he could manipulate people. “But I’m not here to talk about that.” The pirate-man continued. “What I want to know is how you knew about this.”

He slid a photo of Blackjack across the table. Percy couldn’t help but wonder what was going to happen to his pegasus now that his only shot at rescue now needed rescuing himself. “Why should I tell you anything?” Percy eventually told the man.

“I’ve had a long week, and the sooner you’re gone, the sooner I can get back to other, bigger problems.” The man explained. Percy was surprised that the man was going to let him go, and suddenly thought that this might be a trap. But the chance that this man would actually let him free seemed like a better deal than he would get otherwise.

“I had a dream,” Percy said lowly. “That may sound strange, but I swear to Hades its true. I saw—”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Pirate-man held up his hand to stop him. “Did you just swear to Hades?”

Percy froze, realizing that he had messed up. “Well, uh, you see, it’s—” he started back-pedaling, but the man wasn’t paying attention to him anymore.

“First the pegasus, then the mention of Hades,” Pirate-man mumbled under his breath. “Let me guess,” he turned his attention back to Percy. “The Greek gods are real? Hades, Zeus, Apollo—all of them?”

Percy wondered if he could get away with saying no before remembering that the man could probably give him some truth serum if they had any and he’d be forced to tell him. His shoulders slumped. “Yeah,” he mumbled. “Yeah, they’re real. That pegasus you captured—” he pointed to the picture of Blackjack. “he’s mine. So when I had the dream of you guys capturing him, I had to come rescue him.”

The man stared at Percy, trying to determine if he was really telling the truth or not. Percy started to grow uncomfortable when the man dropped his gaze and rubbed his head, like soothing a headache. “If the Greek gods are real,” he started asking, “why haven’t we seen any proof of them?”

“The mist,” Percy answered. “It’s a mystical force that stops mortals from seeing our world. I used the mist to get past the guard at the front gate. Some can see past it, like my mom. It’s how she met my dad.”

“And your dad is…”

“Poseidon.”

“And that makes you what. A god?”

“Demigod, actually. Half mortal, half god.”

The man was taking this all exceptionally well, Percy thought. A sudden thought struck Percy. “Hey, uh, this doesn’t change our little agreement, right? About you letting me go?” When the man didn’t respond right away, Percy’s fear grew. “Please, I gotta get back so I can take finals tomorrow, and if I don’t my girlfriend’s gonna kill me and nothing, not even you, could stop her.”

Pirate-dude held up his hand. “I’ll let you go,” Percy’s shoulder’s sagged in relief. “Just on one condition.”

And there’s the catch. There’s always a catch.

“I’m assuming you can fight,” When Percy nodded, he continued. “If ever needed, I want you to come fight for us.”

Percy paused. “Who’s ‘us’?”

“SHIELD.”

The son of Poseidon considered the offer. On one hand, he really didn’t want to fight anymore. He’d seen and done enough fighting to last him a lifetime. The thought of fighting for this government agency or whatever they were didn’t sit too well with him.

But saying no didn’t sit well either. Saying no meant he wouldn’t get to leave, and Blackjack would be stuck here. He couldn’t fail his family, who were so excited for him to finally be at college. Percy couldn’t fail Annabeth, who was waiting back in New Rome for him.

“Okay.” He said a beat later. Percy wasn’t sure if he was ever going to regret that, but right now, he knew it was his only choice.

The man nodded. “Now that that’s settled,” he reached over the table and unlocked Percy’s handcuffs. Percy rubbed his wrists a little and took off the gloves. “I’ll have someone take you to your… pegasus.”

“Aye aye.” Percy mocked saluted the man whose glare seemed to grow. “Oh, I’m sorry, that was insensitive of me. Aye.”

“Let’s hope you never meet Stark.”

“Who?”

The man ignored him and led him out of the room. A woman was waiting, tapping away on a pad. She looked up when they walked out, eyeing Percy. Percy gave a small wave. She tilted her head a little before addressing the man. “Director Fury, your plane is waiting.”

Pirate-man, or Fury, nodded. He started walking away, leaving Percy with the woman. “Wait,” Percy called. Fury paused and turned around. “You wouldn’t happen to have any donuts, would you?”

\~*~/

When Percy arrived back in New Rome, the sun had started setting. Blackjack took his time, moaning about how awful his day there had been. The woman, whose name Percy didn’t get had led him to Blackjack who was happy to see him (especially with a box of donuts in his hand). Before they left, Percy had asked the woman if they needed his contact info. All she had said was “We’ll find you” and left, which didn’t exactly reassure the demigod.

Blackjack dropped Percy off on the street in front of his apartment. “Stay safe buddy,” Percy told him. “Don’t get caught by any more secret government agencies.”

I wasn’t plannin’ on it boss.

The son of Poseidon smiled. “Alright. Now go get some rest,” Blackjack gave the demigod one last farewell before taking off towards the stables. Percy waited until Blackjack had flown out of sight behind the buildings before heading inside.

Annabeth was waiting on the couch. She had notes spread out all over the coffee table and on the cushions next to her. Percy remembered that she had her final test tomorrow, and it was her one for her major architecture.

She looked up when Percy entered. A smile spread across her face as she rose to greet him. “How’d it go?” She asked, giving him a small peck on the cheek.

“Without a hitch,” Percy lied. “Blackjack’s fine, he’s off to the stables right now to rest.”

“Wonderful.” Annabeth’s smile made Percy feel guilty for lying to her, but he told himself that she didn’t need to be concerned for him. If SHIELD ever decided that they needed him, then he’d cross that bridge when it came time. But for now, as far as Annabeth would know, everything was fine. “Come on, I know you might be tired, but you have your final tomorrow and I want to test you.”

Percy let her lead him to the couch while she quizzed him on Marine Biology. Soon, the thought of SHIELD left his head as he started worrying about his final tomorrow and reassuring Annabeth that she would do fine and that she didn’t need to be worried.

On the other side of California, Nick Fury was looking up research on Greek Mythology. He looked down at the two files that sat next to him. One was Percy Jackson’s file, filled with every school he had attended, who his friends were, even if he had a dental plan.

Next to Percy’s file sat another, thicker file. This one had the SHIELD logo stamped across the front.

And underneath it were the words AVENGERS INITIATIVE.

2

[thedrowsydoormouse]

@anangelamuse-castiel-spnfam told me to answer all the god/goddess questions so here goes nothing!

Anubis: How do you feel about death? 

It depends on the situation. I’m not good at dealing with other people dying but I myself am not scared of it. 

Atum: What are your greatest imperfections?

I’m a little too OCD sometimes to the point where I have a hard time leaving the house. 

Bastet: Do you have any cats?

I wish but I can’t because people I live with are allergic.

Hathor: What brings you joy?

Music, Disney, glitter, dancing, being weird with my friends. It’s a very long list.

Horus: What is one thing you’ve had to fight for in your life?

I’m very lucky because I haven’t really had to fight for anything super major. And even the stuff I had to “fight” for was more just like me having to give a really convincing argument.

Osiris: Do you believe in the underworld?

Yes. And there’s a good chance I’m gunna wind up there some day.

Ra: Do you have any major responsibilities or importance?

*laughs* God no! And I like it that way!

Thoth: Do you like to read/write?

I did a lot when I was younger but lately I just haven’t had the focus or inspiration to sit down and write or read.

Arawn: What is the most terrifying thing you’ve ever done?

Several people I know think I’m a witch because weird things tend to happen around me like my evil 1st grade teacher dying after I put a “curse” on her for treating me like shit. For someone who was maybe 7 or 8 at the time that’s both impressive and terrifying!

Bran: How is your health?

Shockingly really good considering I spend almost all my time sitting on my ass watching movies and eating crap!

Brighid: Tell us about your relationship with your father.

With my birth father it’s really good because we basically have the exact same personality so we get along really well. With my adopted dad it’s ok but he gets on my nerves a lot and does it on purpose just to piss me off because he has the maturity of a 12 year old.

Cernunnos: What is your favorite animal?

I love cats! I mean I also love all animals pretty much equally but cats in particular! 

Danu: What is your relationship with your mother?

My adopted mom is like one of my best friends but my birth mom is an evil manipulative psycho bitch who’s basically dead to me.

Morrigan: What do you think happens when we die?

kind of a cross between purgatory and reincarnation where part of us moves on and becomes a new person but the main part of us that makes us who we are stays behind as a ghost.

Olwen: What is your favorite flower?

I actually hate flowers because the smell gives me headaches and makes me nauseous.

Rhiannon: Have you ever been betrayed?

Multiple times by multiple people in some really horrible ways (like the ex who cheated on me with my own sister then dumped me because I wouldn’t go down on him but she would).

Bragi: What kind of music do you listen to?

Pretty much everything but mostly rock and alternative. As I’m typing this question I’m listening to Iron Man by Black Sabbath from this spotify playlist https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2fhB2uO04lD24DZBMEOb8S?si=pd6oDln_RM2bUTTPe94R6Q 

Freya: Have you ever been in love?

I currently am in love and I’ve been in love in the past. Lets hope this time it ends up working out better for me than last time! 

Freyr: Do you have any children?

No. And I don’t want any. 

Hœnir: Are you a silent or talkative person?

It depends on who I’m with. With some people I don’t say a word but with others I never shut up.

Iounn: How old are you?

24 going on 25 in November.

Loki: What is the best trick you’ve ever pulled on someone?

I actually don’t pull tricks or play pranks.

Odin: What is your family like?

Complicated. I was adopted and have a very large adopted family (most of whom I don’t speak to anymore for one reason or another but mostly bigotry) and I also consider my birth dad's side of my birth family to be part of my family but have no contact with my birth mom’s side.

Thor: Would you consider yourself pretty powerful?

I would hope so. Or else all the ghosts I’ve pissed off are going to come after me when they realize I’m defenseless!

Tree: What have you done with your life? What are you going to do with it?

So far I’ve done nothing but drop out of college and almost wind up hospitalized for anxiety related stuff. But hopefully in the near future I’ll be doing something in the entertainment industry.

Aphrodite: What do you think of yourself?

I love myself and I’m really proud of the person I’ve become.

Ares: Are you an easy person to anger?

It depends on the situation. Most of the time no. But if you’re a close-minded bigot I will unleash hell.

Athena: Would you consider yourself an artist?

I should hope so considering I went to art school and want to do something in a creative field!

Apollo: Do you play any instruments?

I used to take guitar lessons but I sucked. Now I just sing because it’s way easier!

Dionysus: Do you drink?

Regularly!

Hades: Do you have a bad reputation?

It depends on who you talk to. With most people they only every have the nicest things to say about me but with certain people who know who they are they won’t even talk about me.

Hekate: Have you ever tried to communicate with the dead?

I have tried and succeeded and do it fairly regularly.

Hermes: Have you ever stolen anything?

When I was like 3 or 4 I stole a tube of lip gloss that was like $3. 

Poseidon: Are you a moody person?

It depends on a lot of factors. I try not to be but some things just send me over the edge.

Zeus: Are you a confident person?

Some may say a little too confident. But I love my body and i love who I am and it shows and if you can’t handle that then that’s your problem and not mine.

Jupiter: Would people say that you are intimidating or fairly approachable?

For the most part I’m intimidating (I’m over 6′ tall with vibrant dark red hair and usually dressed in all black because goth). But I try to be somewhat approachable to an extent.

Pluto: Where do you think we go when we die? I kind of touched on this in a previous question where part of us moves on to another life and part of us stays behind as a ghost.

Apollo & Dianna: Do you prefer to be up during the day or at night?

I’m pretty much nocturnal at this point. 

Mars: Have you ever gotten into a fight?

Multiple times. And I always win!

Minerva: Do you generally give good advice?

I’d like to think so because a lot of people ask me for advice and they wouldn’t keep doing it if I gave bad advice.

Proserpine: Have you ever felt trapped?

Multiple times. And it gives me anxiety just thinking about it!

Plutus: Do you have a job?

Not at the moment.

Venus: Have you ever had your heart broken?

Too many times for my liking.

Vesta: Do you like being home or do you try to get out whenever you can?

I’m a home body. I love chilling on my bed in my jammies!

Morpheus: Do you daydream often? Of what?

I’m in a pretty much permanent state of daydreaming and the subject of them is constantly changing!

[waveypedia]

Aunt/Mom Selene AU

who’s ready for a flood of spear of selene content from me?? :D This was originally going to be an Aunt Selene AU, but then @donaldtheduckdad came up with the amazing idea of Selene being the triplets’ godly parent (she’s a goddess. It’s Greek mythology. I’m pretty sure there’s a demigod in Trials of Apollo with same-sex parents. It WORKS okay.) I already came up with a lot of these ideas yesterday but I had a bunch of stuff going on, but a lot of these would work for Mom Selene as well as Aunt Selene so just take it. Take it and let me immerse myself in godly parent/aunt headcanons. :P

So Selene somehow finds out Della died/disappeared and had kids who are living with Donald soon after, and she, being the parent/Della’s BFF just decides to kind of adopt the kids. She doesn’t take them away from Donald or anything, she just gives them a new parent.

She doesn’t have any adopting intentions the first time she comes around, but crap these kids are so cute and they need a mom in their life here I come

She doesn’t live at the houseboat, of course - she’s a goddess with her own family and homes all over Greece as well as Mount Olympus. But she comes by quite often. 

I like to think they have a weekly tradition of all eating dinner together, but Selene probably comes by more often on most weeks (provided she’s not dealing with some sort of godly emergency)

Selene is there to pick the kids up from school when Donald can’t, be a babysitter when Donald can’t find one (or, you know, she’s their auntie she’d be a good babysitter even when Donald can find one), and she’s always there on their birthdays and stuff

Donald doesn’t want Selene giving him money, he’s much too proud for that (it drives her nuts), but sometimes when he’s in a really tough spot she’ll bring dinner by and he’ll find a couple hundred dollars and maybe some Greek currency on the counter and he just can’t say no

It kills Selene that Donald won’t let her tell any stories of Della adventuring with Scrooge, but she does her best to tell them tamer tales that don’t involve Scrooge like Della crashing planes for fun

When Zeus finds out he’s really pissed off, especially if it’s Mom Selene, but Selene and the other gods (who’ve either fallen in love with or grown really annoyed by all the stories Selene tells of her adorable mortal triplet babies) won’t let him anywhere near them, and since they’ve cut ties with Scrooge he reluctantly stays away. When they reunite he’s really pissed, but somehow maintains self-control and waits until they crash on Ithaquack to let his rage out

Zeus is also really pissed since he keeps trying to get revenge by making the Sunchaser crash (since ya know planes are in the sky and that’s his domain), but Launchpad does that just fine without him 

Speaking of the other gods, Selene would totally invite them to meet the kids! Donald would be really pissed at first because she brought these all-powerful dangerous beings in to play with his babies but Selene gave them a strict lecture beforehand and everyone is fine. Mostly.

Ares still isn’t allowed in Donald’s house, though.

Poseidon and Athena visit most often. Poseidon was immediately taken with the family because they live on a houseboat and Donald was in the Navy. Donald is reluctant to kick out Poseidon because he could easily get angry and upturn their houseboat, but Poseidon is good with the kids

Athena visits mostly because of Huey, and because of her rivalry with Poseidon, but she loves all of the kids. She was a bit miffed when Huey asked about Thoth, the Egyptian god of knowledge, though. (But they pulled some strings and Huey got his visit.)

Hermes also visits a lot (he likes Louie), but he’s really busy. He feels a bit responsible though, because there are all these dark gods and entities attracted by Louie’s morally greyer side.

So basically, everyone in the family has a god. Poseidon for Donald, Athena for Huey, Selene for Dewey, and Hermes for Louie.

Scrooge gets Zeus

Also, Storkules! Since Selene found out, so would he. Selene visits more often then him, simply because she’s a goddess and has more flexibility, but more often than not he’s there for Friday family dinners

He’s also there when Donald’s not in a horrible mood, giving them time to strengthen their friendship

Donald is worried about letting Storkules babysit the kids at first, since he doesn’t know his own strength, but after one afternoon when he could find no one else (Selene, surprisingly, was busy), he realizes that all his concerns have been in vain and Storkules is amazing with kids

Selene tries to take the kids in her moon chariot.

Donald does not agree.

Dewey sneaks out anyway.

When the canon timeline rolls around, Storkules and Selene show up at the houseboat for their Friday family dinner to find it gone and freak

They’re running around Mount Olympus and heading off to other god hangouts trying to find them

Selene is really scared Zeus did something 

Finally Poseidon shows up and tells them about the Atlantis adventure, but he doesn’t know about their current whereabouts

Finally Hestia, goddess of the hearth, looks through the hearths in Duckberg and finds Huey, Dewey, Louie, and Webby chilling in front of the one in McDuck Manor (none of them checked McDuck Manor because they know how diligent Donald was about avoiding Scrooge, and they didn’t want to anger Zeus)

So they head off to McDuck Manor and Donald/HDL are so mad at themselves because they freaking forgot Selene and Storkules!

Scrooge is really wary at first, but Donald tells him about how they’ve been part of the family

Storkules gets a room in McDuck Manor, but he spends a lot of time in the houseboat with Donald. Selene, being a goddess, doesn’t need a room, but she spends a lot of time in Della’s old room, and it becomes hers

Selene gets along really well with Mrs. Beakley, and Storkules with Launchpad (demigod bros theory incoming)

Selene also gets along really well with Webby, as does Storkules, but Selene and Webby have a special bond

Webby has Mrs. Beakley, but despite being thousands of years old Selene appears nearer to the age of Webby’s mother, and those little details can do wonders

Also, Webby’s a lot like Della, in ways Dewey isn’t, and Selene and Webby just immediately click

Plus, Selene is beautiful and gives Webby fashion advice and rides on the moon chariot and advice on her girlfriends Lena and Gosalyn in the future (as well as Debbigail and Loubby and anyone Webby dates, but you bet if they hurt one feather on Webby’s head Selene will destroy them)

(as will Storkules, Donald, Mrs. Beakley, Launchpad, Scrooge, and the triplets)

(Webby’s lovers better watch out)

(She’s got a lot of people who care about her)

Because Selene is lesbian mom passing her lesbian advice onto her young bi adopted daughter

 When Dewey and Webby discover the Spear of Selene note, Dewey is heartbroken because he thought Selene didn’t know anything about what happened

They still go to Greece, wanting to confront Selene as much as they do Donald and Scrooge

Storkules just happens to be staying on Ithaquack when they crash and is overjoyed to show Huey and Louie his home and father, but Zeus kinda gets in the way of that

Selene wants to go help, but then she notices Dewey and Webby, her mini-Dellas, are missing and goes off to look for them

The monster guarding the Spear of Poseidon recognizes them and says hello

Selene meets them in her garden and is just as confused as they are. Webby finally confronts her, and she tells them there isn’t a spear of selene

whether Selene really is as in the dark about Della and the Spear of Selene is yet to be seen, but she doesn’t really hang around for the investigation. She just tells Dewey and Webby she’s told them all she knows/can tell, and shepherds them back to the group

the one bad thing about Selene being Mom Selene is that I was thinking since she’s not related to the triplets, she can have a special bond with Webby that’s not interrupted by the I’m not family train, since she isn’t family with any of them

But I love Mom Selene too much

Most of my AUs couldn’t happen in canon, but if Selene and Storkules decided to show up at McDuck Manor and be the new aunt/mom and uncles you wouldn’t see me mad! 

frank pls

give me goddess mom/aunt and demigod uncle fluff