#ERROR: REPORT ABOVE

[double-ended]

[fideidefenswhore]

Mary was thrilled at this seemingly perfect reconciliation, and the common people, who had always been fond of her, were pleased at the improvement in her treatment; however, Queen Jane's interest did not extend to the King's other daughter, the two-year-old Elizabeth, who had been banished to the Palace of Hatfield and was out of favour following the execution of her mother.

Crown of Blood: The Deadly Inheritance of Lady Jane Grey, by Nicola Tallis

[xqueen-of-disasterx]

How about intersex Natasha x fem reader where Natasha is basically on her hands and knees begging to fuck fem reader. Saying things like, "I'll make you feel so good." or "I only need 10 minutes."

High and dry

Paring: fem!reader x Natasha Romanoff

Warnings: SMUT, begging, pet names, nipple play, switch!reader, switch!Nat, P in V, breeding kink, soft sex

!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional!

Masterlist-

"Please" I heard Natasha beg "Like I said Tasha I need to finish my mission report first" She signed loudly. She woke up from a perfect dream; she had been thrusting in and out your tight heat and then just as she was about to cum- her alarm went of leaving her high and dry. She awoke with you already up and taking a shower, because of both of your latest mission you had opted for a few days of home office together. You only came home yesterday evening as the both of you decided on cuddles instead of a steamy love making session.  

Now you where standing under the hot stream of the shower head, letting the hot droplets of water run over the soft skin of your delicate body. Only with a towel on you reentered the shared bedroom and Natasha felt like she just got even harder.

"I’ll go write the mission report now alright baby?" You leaned down to kiss her. Of course she noticed the big bulge in her pants with a little wet patch from her pre cum. "I hoped for some morning stretches first bunny?" She pulled you on top of her pelvis, you mewled at feeling the the bulge against your own crotch. 

"Natasha not now" It took an incurable amount of will power not to devour your delicious girlfriend, but finishing the mission report would be much smarter. After all a quickie rarely failed to become hours long of passionate love making between the sheets. She groaned rubbing her temples, you had rarely seen her so needy. 

A few hours later Natasha sneaked around the house like an animal searching for prey. "Natasha what’s the matter?" You already knew the answer to the question, but you wanted to hear her say it. "I need to fuck you, bunny, please" she mewled appearing behind your office chair to kiss your neck. "Natasha soon" you pushed her face away "I need to focus" 

"I’ll make you feel so good" She pushed her face into your neck to inhale your sweet smell. She was getting at you it was hard to say no to her anymore "I’ll only need 10 minutes" she cooed against your skin. You closed your laptop before catching her lips with yours. "Fuck Tasha, do it quick" She couldn’t hide her excitement she wanted to kiss every centimetre of your soft skin. She spun your office chair around to lift you up, your wrapped your legs around your waist as she carried you to to the bedroom. 

"Fuck sweetheart, ‘m gonna fuck this tight pussy so good." She threw you on the bed her hands going to the hem of your shirt pushing it up. She groaned in responds of seeing your stiff nipples. Her mouth latched onto your nipple teasing the hardened nub with her exerted tongue. You mewl at the sensation all the thought of the paper work long having left your clouded mind. 

"Fuck Nat I need you inside" You moaned out pushing her head further down your stomach. "let me ride you sweetheart" Nat nodded before laying down on her back. You helped her undress before pushing her boxers to her mid thigh her large penis standing against her stomach. You grabbed her semi hard lengthen before moving your fist up and down her hardening dick. 

You straddled her pelvis your hole hovering above her hardened dick. Her hands went to your hips guiding you down on her shaft. You let out an almost pornographic moan at her delicious stretch. You stilled for a moment to adjust to her length making Nat lose her mind. Your tight velvet walls hugging her shaft so good. Slowly you started to move you hips up and down and Natasha trusts up her into her tight heat groaning at he feeling.

You grab on the shoulders of your girlfriend before your lips meet hers. Her tongue went inside your mouth fighting your dominance, which after a fair fight she woman. Natasha needed more, more of your tight heat. Before you could say anything she had switched your positions pistoling inside your heat like an animal. 

Her hand went to your puffy clit playing with the bundle of nerves making the pleasure almost unbearable. Your wall pulsate around her cock, she knew how close you were and she felt the same. "Fuck baby can I cum inside please" She whined above you and the idea of her sed in your womb turned you on. "Fuck Natty fill me up" She brought you to your peak before having her peak yourself. You felt her hot cum shooting inside your womb as you cream her dick. 

“Fuck I needed that” Natasha laughed before pulling you into a tight embrace. “I’m sure you got time for another round”

:)

[wonderlandwalker]

Second Chances | Eddie Munson x Reader

Stranger Things Masterlist / Inbox Summary: Eddie royally screws up your first date (read part 1 here) Content Warnings / Tags: fluff (i think), swearing, the worst luck ever, no use of y/n, henderson!reader, reader is described to have some freckles idk, prolly a lot of spelling errors that I'll fix later read now at your own will Word Count: 1.4k A/N: so I kinda went through some trauma this past month but I just started ADHD meds and surprise surprise they work. Still didn't proofread this and am purely posting it cause I literally just wrote all of it in one go and I have poor impulse control even the meds can't fix that

He was late, and he only knew he was late because Wayne had gotten home and wondered what he was still doing at home. Now normally Wayne wouldn't have bothered grilling the guy, but Eddie hadn't been able to shut up about this for a week. Turns out this day was the day the kitchen clock had decided to stop working, resulting in a TV remote being flung at it the moment Eddie realised, because, of course, it had to be today, of course, his luck would run out again. But Wayne wouldn't let him give up that easily, because as he said it: "fate can go fuck itself, go over there and grovel", which honestly wasn't such a bad idea. So here he was now, definitely speeding, definitely more nervous than he already was, and definitely praying to any god who would listen for help. Because this was your first date, a date he didn't think would happen in the first place and he has already managed to screw it up without even being there. In an after thought he came to the further realization that he definitely did not want to face Dustin any time soon, the boy had become oddly protective of you once his friends actually clued him in on what was happening, which was obvious to everyone -except as established Dustin- with the way Eddie's eyes would trail after you every time he managed to spot you. He was trying to hype himself up, talk some confidence into himself and find a good way to apologize, not that he thought there were any. But just as he turned the corner to your block he heard it, he heard the worst possible sound on earth at this moment, he heard the sirens to Hopper's car. For a sweet small second, he allowed himself to believe Hopper wasn't after him, there was someone else committing a traffic violation on the other side of the street. Yeah, that's exactly what was going on, on the other side of this very much empty street was a car with a bunch of teens hooking up and Hopper had turned on his siren as a warning so he could put his clothes back on. Thinking about it, that wasn't even such a wild idea, like, that has happened to him before, well, except for the empty street anomaly. Right, time to face the music: Eddie came to a stop only about a hundred meters away from your house and rolled down his window as Hopper approached. Eddie shook out face to rid himself of the nerves and turned on his best smile. "So what's your excuse this time?" The Police Chief began to ask. Eddie quirked up at the question "It's not like the other times Jim I promise." Hopper looked him up and down squinted his eyes at him, cocking his head down just the slightest bit "How many warnings have I given you this month kid?" Eddie sighed, he knew where this was going. "Two" "Which makes this?" "The third" Eddie answered, dragging out his words. "Third warning kid, gotta write you up today" Hopper began to grab the police pad in his back pocket to write up the incident report, but Eddie was not above begging, at least not currently. "Listen, Jim-, Mr Hopper-, Sir, you can give me the ticket but can you please give it to me sometime else-" he was frantically moving his hands while talking now "- I'll even come by the station and pick it up myself tomorrow morning first thing but I have to-" And of course, things had to get worse:

The gods hadn't listened to his hasty prayers, because he could see Dustin in your open front door attempting to push you outside while pointing at Eddie's van. And he could tell the moment you spotted him because he could feel a small nerve entering his system, he could feel your presence connecting with his. And Hopper was asking him to please step out of the car right now. So he did, he stepped out and saw you give him a small wave which he tried to return except Hopper was snapping him out of the trance you still had on him from the other side of the street. So Eddie gave it one last-ditch attempt "Hopper please" "Alright let's hear it, what's your excuse?" Eddie's eyes brightened with the bit of hope he had just grabbed. "I have a date" he tried to explain "A date with who?" The chief wasn't gonna admit it, but the kid had grabbed his interest. So Eddie started rambling about how you two had met and how it should be your first date and then he caught your eyes again and he couldn't hear it but his mind filled in the blanks as he watched your soft giggling while looking at the situation unfold and he felt all his tension drop out of his body at once, he felt at ease from the way your eyes searched his, instantaneously so. "Wait a second, Claudia's daughter?" Hopper was looking over at the porch now too as your mother came out of the house as well. "That's not a great first impression" "Tell me about it" Eddie was trying to ignore reality as hard as he could right now. "Alright here's what's gonna happen, giving you one more warning but it's coming out of your tolerance next month" Hopper had assumed his dad stance, a hand on his hip and the other pointed straight at Eddie, and if he hadn't been oh so terribly grateful right now he would have been tempted to make fun of him for it. "Yes, yes! Definitely that please!" Hopper released one last sigh before he spoke back up "Go on over there then" Eddie took the olive branch and ran away with it before he could change his mind. With his van performing some emergency parking down the road he ran over to you just as you shooed off Dustin, and now he stood face to face with you, he stood close enough to count the fading summer freckles on the bridge of your nose and to smell the perfume he had started associating with you, and he wanted more time to admire how well he could see you right now but he had more pressing business. "I'll make this up to you I promise" He knew his promise probably wasn't worth much, but he had to try anyway. He had already started internally debating if it was worth getting down on his knees to beg as a smile cracked on your face. "This is exactly what Dustin predicted would happen" You were full-on grinning now, and it took him a second to comprehend that you weren't upset, you were amused, and he was confused. "He what?" "When he found out we had a date this weekend he tried to convince me you'd be at least an hour late with the Hopper on your ass I'm just stunned at his accuracy" Maybe this really was his year after all "So you're not upset?" "I'm just upset I owe that nosy dipshit money now" And now Eddie was laughing too because you started asking him if he wanted to just skip his reservation which you guys had missed anyway and go to the drive-in because you had heard they were playing Monty Python. So Monty Python it was as he drove there and got both the sweet and the salty popcorn because he wasn't sure which you'd prefer and spent the rest of the evening what he'd say was the perfect time. But he wasn't done yet, he had promised to make things up to you and this was only the beginning for him, a beginning to many good times ahead.

[@saradika-graphics still being my go-to for dividers] Taglist: @vicurious28, @arlxtoa, @em0220, @madyoghurt, @saturnsbxtchx, @maskofmirrors

[cowplant-snacks]

BEWARE OF SIMS USED WITH CRYSTAL CREATIONS

Are you getting this LE? Here's what I have found out from personal testing.

Background: I started getting the LE above after adding the townies for my upcoming drag show to my game. I tracked the issue down to a sim that had jewelry and hidden gameplay traits from the Crystal Creations pack.

Shout out to @toastie-sim for all the troubleshooting suggestions! 💕

Troubleshooting and Things I learned:

Disabling the pack stopped the LE, however, upon re-enabling the pack the issue continued, although I had done a Save As to remove all the Crystal Creations content.

The issue spread to other active households and LOTS as I played them

Bulldozing the affected lots did not stop the LE

Deleting the initial sim and household that caused the LE did not stop LE from continuing to popping up in the households and lots that the issue had spread to

Using MCCC to empty the affected sims household and personal inventories did not stop the LE.

Issue can be caused by trayfiles or sims downloaded from the gallery

Solution:

“Saving” the sims: Using MCCC, I was able to copy and paste the initially affected sim onto a new sim so I could use them without continuing to get an LE. I copied them from a version I had saved with the pack disabled (that way they were not wearing any of the Crystal Creations jewelry and they did not have any hidden traits related to the pack and gameplay).

Fixing the affected sims and lots: I rolled back the save to before I had added the initial affected household.

To keep the changes I had made to the affected lot: I was able to place the version of the lot I had saved without the pack enabled. I did this so I didn’t lose any of the decorating I had done. Wasn’t necessary to stop the LE, I did want to lose the decorating I had done.

Be cautious of adding Sims to your game that have been used with Crystal Creations.

What I Don't Know:

If the error corrupts or ruins your savefile. I am not sure if you can just ignore the LE and your save is fine but I don’t like doing that. And the fact that I could not find a way to stop the LE freaked me out. And the issue seem to be spreading to every household I played.

EA Bug Reports - Go hit me too!

https://answers.ea.com/t5/Bug-Reports/OPEN-CCSP-Cannot-remove-jewelry-LE-generated/td-p/13550495

[camgoloud]

“average ninth house child has over five thousand bones” factoid actually just combination statistical error and misunderstanding of ninth house law. the average ninth house child has 250 bones. the approximately ten thousand exoskeletal bones on the person of the reverend daughter harrowhark nonagesimus at any given moment belong legally to the house in common, not to her specifically, and should not have been counted in this data set. why was this error enough to drag the reported average for all ninth house children so far above its actual value? well,

[genshin-impact-updates]

Web Event "Fragrant Fantasy" Now Online: Embark on a perfume-making journey with Miss Emilie~ Take part to obtain Primogems and other in-game rewards!

>> Click to Take Part in Event <<

Flowers and trees intertwine, mingling together to create a melody of fragrance.

Embark on a perfume-making journey with Miss Emilie~

〓Event Duration〓

July 9, 2024 – July 15, 2024 23:59 (UTC+8)

*Rewards cannot be claimed after the event ends. Please claim them in time.

〓Eligibility〓

Travelers who have reached Adventure Rank 10 or above can participate in this event.

〓Event Description〓

During the event, you can log into Genshin Impact daily, consume Original Resin, claim Commission Rewards, and complete other missions to obtain card packs.

Open the card pack at the workbench to obtain any Plant and Omni Cards. Plant and Omni Cards can be used to blend perfumes. You can obtain different grades of perfume based on the level of cards used.

After successfully blending perfumes, you can obtain Primogems and other in-game rewards based on the total number of perfumes made. Meanwhile, you can give these perfumes to Furina, Navia, and Sigewinne, and they will provide different feedback and evaluations based on the perfumes gifted.

You will receive fragrance reports from different companions for each bottle of perfume gifted. Give out perfume and share your fragrance report to obtain Primogems and other in-game rewards.

〓Obtain Ingredients〓

You can obtain card packs through the following methods and open them at the workbench to receive the corresponding Plant or Omni Cards:

1. Complete the following actions in Genshin Impact and the web event every day: log into Genshin Impact every day, consume 40 Original Resin, and complete other missions to receive the corresponding number of plant card packs.

2. Daily missions refresh at 04:00 (Server Time) each day. Unclaimed plant card packs will also be cleared by then. Please claim and use them in time. Claimed plant card packs will not be cleared.

*If you try to visit the event at around 04:00 (Server Time), which is when the daily missions refresh, you may encounter a brief network error. Please refresh the page if you encounter this error.

〓Make Perfumes〓

1. You need to place three different plant cards separately when making perfume. These plant cards have mutually exclusive relationships. You can open the Perfume Handbook on the left side of the workbench to read the relevant information on perfume blending. Using different plant cards will result in perfumes with different fragrances and colors.

2. Two same basic plant cards can be merged into an advanced plant card. Three advanced plant cards can be used to make a premium perfume.

3. You have the opportunity to draw Omni Cards from card packs. Omni Cards can be used to replace any basic or advanced plant cards. Additionally, when you use three Omni Cards to blend perfume, it will automatically create a perfume that you have yet to own.

4. Failing to blend a perfume does not deduct plant cards and you can try again multiple times.

5. During the blending process, you can visit the Exchange Shop at any time and use available plant cards that you no longer require to exchange for plant cards of the same level that you need.

6. Once you have successfully blended a perfume, you can send it to a companion. The corresponding companion will give different feedback based on the perfume you send out.

*If you exit in the middle of the blending process, plant cards will not be deducted.

*If you try to blend perfumes at around 04:00 (Server Time), which is when the daily missions refresh, you may encounter a brief network error. Please refresh the page if you encounter this error.

〓Customize Perfume Packaging〓

1. You can create perfume packaging for your companions on the page. Depending on the types of plant cards unlocked, different dyes can be unlocked.

2. You can use dyes to create your very own perfume packaging.

3. While designing the perfume packaging, you can clear the dyes you have applied at any time and start over, or undo the last dye application to remake it.

〓Event Rewards〓

Make a total of 12 bottles of perfume, successfully make 1 premium perfume, send 1 bottle of perfume to your companion, and share your fragrance report once to obtain a total of Primogems ×120, Mystic Enhancement Ore ×8, Hero's Wit ×8, and Mora ×90,000.

*The in-game rewards will be distributed via in-game mail. The mail will expire after 30 days, so don't forget to claim the rewards in time.

*This web event is provided purely for entertainment. It is not indicative of any related gameplay features in Genshin Impact.

[electronickingdomfox]

USS Enterprise decks

Updated part 1 here

Updated part 2 here

This post got me thinking about the actual location inside the ship of several areas. Sure, there are many blueprints and reference books that have published complete and detailed layouts of the Enterprise. But ultimately, they're interpretations of different authors, filling in the blanks, and they often disagree with each other.

So this is a list of the bare minimum of facts. All the deck locations that can be gleaned from TOS episodes. Beyond that, it's up to anyone's imagination.

*Feel free to make additions or corrections to this post. This is only in reference to the original ship as seen in the series, not taking into account the refit ship from the movies, or alterations/retcons introduced in later series.

Saucer section (primary hull)

Most locations seen in the series belong to this section (as deduced from the curved corridors). The first version of the Writer's Guide tell us it has 20 decks. The later edition (season 2 onwards) reduced the decks to 11.

Deck 1

-Bridge: Obvious from a simple inspection of the ship's exterior. And also confirmed by the Writer's Guide to be in this deck.

Deck 2

-The Romulan Commander's "guest" quarters: Spock tells the turbolift to bring them to this deck, before leaving her in detention, in "The Enterprise Incident". I don't think we ever see other location said to be here (maybe she got the whole deck for herself; lucky!).

Deck 3

-Recreation room 6: Rand offers Charlie to come here, in "Charlie X".

-Recreation room 3: Spock says Bele is chasing Lokai in front of this place, in "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield".

-Crewmen's lounge: Same as above.

Deck 4

-Environmental control: Scotty says power's been shut down here, in "The Ultimate Computer".

-Living quarters: Kirk confirms this, in "The Ultimate Computer".

Deck 5

-Sickbay: Kirk brings Spock to this deck after ordering him to report to sickbay, in "Amok Time". He does the same with Elaan of Troyius. Strangely enough, most blueprints place sickbay in deck 7 instead.

-Kirk's quarters: Confirmed in "Journey to Babel", which also shows the cabin number (3F 121). The same number was first seen in "The Conscience of the King", but without specifying the deck.

-Recreation room 3: Spock says Bele is chasing Lokai in front of this place, in "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield". May be a script error, since a moment ago he had said this place was in deck 3.

-Transporter room: As Lokai seems to run directly here, we may assume it's also in deck 5 (though there are probably many more transporter rooms throughout the ship).

Deck 6

-Briefing room: Sargon calls McCoy from here, in "Return to Tomorrow". May be the same briefing room from other episodes.

-Guest rooms: Bele and Lokai are assigned quarters here, in "Let That Be Your Last Battlefield".

-Living quarters: Kirk confirms this, in "The Ultimate Computer".

Deck 8

-Auxiliary control: The android Norman hijacks the controls here, in "I, Mudd".

-Evaluation laboratory: Seen on a plaque, in "And the Children Shall Lead". Kirk and Spock arrived on this deck in search for Auxiliary control, so it should be in deck 8 as well.

Deck 12

-Janice Rand's quarters: In "The Enemy Within", after seeing Rand attacked by evil Kirk, a crewman reports they're in deck 12. The number of her cabin is also visible (3C 46).

-Kirk's quarters: In very early episodes ("Mudd's Women" and "The Enemy Within"), Kirk's quarters were here, instead of in deck 5. Since the number of saucer decks was reduced to 11 in season 2, the change makes sense.

Deck 14

-Transporter room: In "Dagger of the Mind", Dr. Van Gelder is locked in this deck, after arriving inside a cargo box.

-Personnel Director office: Seen on a plaque during Van Gelder's escape.

-Science Library: Same as above.

Unknown deck

These are some locations, likely from the saucer section, but with unspecified deck. There are plenty of such examples, so this isn't an exhaustive list.

-Impulse engines: The Writer's Guide confirms that the impulse engines are in the primary hull, in case of saucer separation. I think the impulse engines are only seen in "The Doomsday Machine", when Scotty is working aboard the identical Constellation. Though they look just as a reused set from Engineering.

-Spock's quarters: The cabin number is seen in "Amok Time" (3F 125). Possibly, it's in deck 5 near Kirk's quarters, considering the similar numbering.

-McCoy's quarters: Only seen in "The Man Trap" (I think), which also shows the number (3F 127). Again, it's probably near Kirk and Spock's cabins.

-Mudd's quarters: The number is barely legible, but looks like 3F 125, in "Mudd's Women". This happens to be the same as Spock's cabin. The likely explanation is that they didn't have a design for Spock's quarters so early in the series. The fun explanation is that they evicted Spock just to make room for Mudd.

-Uhura's quarters: Seen in "The Tholian Web", and adapted for Elaan in "Elaan of Troyius".

-Scotty's quarters: Seen in "By Any Other Name".

-Life Science Section - Botany Department: Seen in "The Man Trap".

-Gymnasium: Seen in "Charlie X".

-Officer's mess: Seen in "Space Seed".

-Botanical garden: Seen in "Is There in Truth No Beauty?".

-Briefing room: Different from the usual briefing room, it's seen in "Space Seed" when they decide Khan's fate.

-Biochemistry lab: Seen in "The Deadly Years".

Since I've reached the picture limit, the continuation with the Engineering hull sets will be in another post, here.

[rebeccathenaturalist]

Okay, y'all, it's rant time again. Buckle up.

A new report just came out from Public Citizen highlighting the dangers of using apps and AI foraging guides for identifying mushrooms, particularly when mushroom foraging. It's the latest in a string of warnings that are fighting against a tide of purported convenience ("just take a picture and get your answer instantly!")

I've ranted about this since last August, and I also wrote up a detailed post on how to identify an AI-generated foraging guide. I'm also including info on the limitations of apps and AI in The Everyday Naturalist: How to Identify Animals, Plants, and Fungi Wherever You Go. I'm not just saying this to toot my own horn--it's because nature identification, and teaching it to others, is literally what I do for a living. So this is a topic near and dear to my heart.

I teach a very, very specific sort of identification class; whether we're focusing on animals, plants, fungi, or all of the above, I walk people through a detailed process of how to observe a given organism, make note of its various physical traits and habitat, and use that information to try to determine what it is. I emphasize the need to use as many sources as possible--field guides, websites, online and in-person groups, journal articles, etc.--to make absolutely sure that your identification is solid.

And every year, I get people (thankfully, a very small minority of my students) who complain because my two-hour basic mushroom hunting class wasn't just five minutes of introduction and one hundred and fifteen minutes of me showing slide after slide of edible mushrooms. There are so many people out there who just want a quick, easy answer so they can frolic in the woods and blithely pick mushrooms like some idealized image of a cottagecore herbalist with a cabin full of dried plants and smiling frogs or something.

While I do incorporate a bit of information on getting started with the app iNaturalist in my classes, it is as only ONE of MANY tools I encourage people to use. Sure, it's more solid than most apps because, in addition to the algorithmic I.D. suggestions it initially gives you, other iNaturalist users can go onto your observations later and either agree with your I.D.s or suggest something different and even explain why.

And yet--even as great as iNat is, it and its users can still be wrong. So can every other I.D. app out there. And I think that is one thing that the hyper-romanticized approaches to foraging--and nature identification in general--miss. In order to be a good forager, you HAVE to also be good at nature identification.

And nature identification is an entire process that requires you to have solid observational and critical thinking skills, to be able to independently research using many different types of tools, and be willing to invest the time, patience, and focus to properly arrive at a solid identification--if not to species level, then as far down the taxonomic ladder as you can realistically manage. (There's a reason even the experts complain about Little Brown Mushrooms and Damned Yellow Composites!)

People mistake one single tool--apps--for the entire toolkit. They assume any book they find on Amazon is going to be as good as any other, and don't take the time to look up the author to determine any credentials or experience, or even whether they actually exist or not. It doesn't help that the creators of these products often advertise them as "the only [book/app/etc.] you need to easily identify [organism of choice]!"

I mean, sure, the world isn't going to end if you never question the birdsong results on the Merlin app, or if you go through life thinking a deer fern is just a baby western sword fern. But when we get into people actually eating things they find in the wild, there's often no room for error. There are plants and mushrooms that can kill you even if you only eat a tiny amount. And even if they don't kill you, they may make you wish you were dead for a few days while you suffer through a whole host of gastrointestinal nastiness and other symptoms.

There aren't any shortcuts if you want to be safe in your foraging. You HAVE to be willing to do the work. And any teacher, author, or product that says otherwise isn't being ethical. I'm glad to see more people speaking out against the "fast foodization" of foraging in regards to overreliance on apps and the existence of AI foraging books; I just hope it's enough to prevent more people from getting sick or dying.

[coochiequeens]

Doctors and nurses who are not willing to listen to their patients should be replaced

BY VICTORIA SMITH

The third time I went into labour, I was determined to avoid getting told off. With both of my previous births, I had somehow managed to get things wrong. My errors the first time: going to hospital too early, then, when I returned three hours later, “leaving it so late”. The second time: ignoring assurances that I didn’t need to come in yet, then giving birth in the car park — an event I later discovered was being used in antenatal classes as an example of women “not planning ahead”.

“My previous births have been fast,” I said, when I went into labour with my third, “so I’d like to come in now.” I was speaking to the woman at the midwife-led unit that is the only option where I live. (If you need a caesarean section, you have to be transferred to next town.) “Third babies are notoriously difficult,” was her response.

What an odd thing to say to a woman already in labour. The “notoriously” suggested it wasn’t based on any actual evidence, but rather a kind of folk wisdom. It felt as though I was being warned not to tempt fate, not to assume that this baby would just pop out. I saw myself being categorised as one of those arrogant women who presumes to know her own body, only to be taught a harsh yet much-deserved lesson. “Third babies are notoriously difficult” sounded not unlike “third-time mothers shouldn’t get above themselves”.

In fact, I have never been particularly cocky about childbirth. When I was pregnant with my first child, back in the days when the Right-wing press were still obsessed with famous women being “too posh to push”, I wondered if I might be able to get an elective caesarean myself. I did not particularly care about childbirth being a wonderful experience, or about “doing it well”. I didn’t care if the Daily Mail thought I was a joke.

What I cared about was not having a child who would face the same difficulties as my brother, who was starved of oxygen at birth. This has had serious consequences for him, and for the rest of my family. Just how serious is hard to gauge. He was born traumatised; there has never been a before to compare the after with. What there has been instead is the hazy outline of an alternative life, one that runs parallel to the one he has now. It’s a life that began with the problem being identified sooner, with him being delivered quickly, perhaps by emergency caesarean. The difference between this and his actual life comes down to something small: mere moments, mere breaths.

I was born three years after my brother, in a larger hospital, where my mother was induced and monitored carefully. There is something very strange about being the sibling who had the safe birth. It feels as though I stole it. There is a constant sense of guilt, as if my life — my independence, my choices — constitutes a form of gloating. “This is what you could have had.” Everything I do feels like something owed to my brother (do it, because he can’t) but also something taken from him (you shouldn’t have done that, because he should have done it first).

Still, my family were fortunate, insofar as my brother didn’t die. Current reports on the Nottingham maternity scandal reference 1,700 cases, with an estimated 201 mothers and babies who might have survived had they received better care. What strikes me, reading them, is the enormous gulf between the cost of a disastrous birth and the trivial, opportunistic way in which childbirth is so often politicised — with mothers themselves viewed as morally, if not practically, to blame if anything goes wrong.

As a feminist who concerns herself with how the female body is demonised, my interest in debates about birthing choices is more than personal. I have read books railing against the over-medicalisation of childbirth, aligning it with a patriarchal need to appropriate female reproductive power. I have also read books protesting the fetishisation of “natural” birth, suggesting that it infantilises women, that it implies women deserve pain. To be honest, I find both arguments persuasive and dismaying. Both are right about the way in which misogyny and professional arrogance can shift the focus away from meeting the needs of women and babies. I feel a kind of rage that we are told to pick a side.

Representations of the labouring woman are so often negative: the naïve idealist, the “birthzilla“, the birth-plan obsessive, the woman who is “too posh to push”. This latter stereotype has gone hand-in-hand with a veneration of vaginal births, and stigmatisation of caesareans, that has had sometimes disastrous consequences. Midwives at the centre of the Furness General Hospital scandal were reported to have “pursued natural birth ‘at any cost’”, referring to one another as “the musketeers”; at least 11 babies and one mother died. But their approach was sanctioned by their employer: the 2006 NHS document “Pathways to Success: a self-improvement toolkit” explicitly suggested that “maternity units applying best practice to the management of pregnancy, labour and birth will achieve a [caesarean section] rate consistently below 20% and will have aspirations to reduce that rate to 15%”. Proposed benefits to this included “a sense of pride in units”.

Responses to maternity scandals now express horror that such an anti-intervention culture ever arose — responses in the same press that denigrated women such as Victoria Beckham and Kate Winslet for not giving birth vaginally. Instead, newspapers now stoke outrage over “natural” treatments during NHS births, such as burning herbs. Women have been shamed for having caesareans, but they have also been shamed for wanting births with minimum intervention — as though they are selfish and spoilt for seeking control over such an extreme situation.

In his memoir This Is Going To Hurt, former doctor Adam Kay writes disparagingly of women who arrive at the delivery suite with birth plans:

“‘Having a birth plan’ always strikes me as akin to having a ‘what I want the weather to be’ plan or a ‘winning the lottery’ plan. Two centuries of obstetricians have found no way of predicting the course of a labour, but a certain denomination of floaty-dressed mother seems to think she can manage it easily.”

Wanting to have some control over your experience of labour — which will hurt you and could kill you or your baby — is not akin to some messianic aspiration to control the weather. And in his mockery of the woman who wants whale song and aromatherapy oils, ironically, Kay deploys the same silencing techniques that might intimidate a woman out of seeking the very interventions he so prizes. What he and others do not seem to grasp is that their arrogance is a problem, regardless of which course of action they champion. It makes women feel they can’t speak, for fear of inviting hostility at their most vulnerable moments. It’s true that none of us knows our body well enough to know how we will give birth. But, looking back, I find it utterly insane, not least given my own family history, that one of my biggest worries during labour was “please don’t let anyone get cross with me”. Then again, I don’t think that fear is unrelated to the desire to remain safe.

Birth is not a joke. It is not a place for professional dick-swinging or political one-upmanship. I cannot describe — and, as I am not my mother, cannot fully understand — the shame of feeling that you “let down” your child before they drew their first breath, that they will forever suffer because of it. You watch an entire life unfolding and that feeling is there, every single day. This is the fear of the women in labour who are characterised as either idiots mesmerised by fantasy homebirths or cold-hearted posh ladies who can’t take the pain. If things go wrong, they are the ones who will bear the consequences, reflecting every day on what might have been, if they’d only done more.

When people discuss their siblings, my mind does wander to the one I don’t have, the one who was born safely. Perhaps he would have a job he loved, or one he hated, but in any case a job. Perhaps he would have a partner. Perhaps he would have children, and I would be their aunt. Perhaps we wouldn’t get on, wouldn’t even speak, but he’d have a life of his own. I know he thinks about this too. I wonder if the professionals who presided over his birth have thought about him since.

My third labour was not, by the way, “notoriously difficult”. My third son arrived into the world safe and well. No one can say why him or me, and not my brother. Mothers may long for control over birth, for which we are mocked; but we do not have it, for which we are blamed. Politics still takes precedence over our needs, and the needs of our babies.

[hederasgarden]

The Astronaut's Wife AU | Bob Floyd x F!Reader

At 2:36 pm, 125 miles above Earth, astronaut Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd lost contact with NASA for two long minutes. The official report lists a simple electrical error, but when mysterious and bizarre things begin to happen to the rest of Bob’s crew, his wife suspects something is terribly wrong. Eventually, she uncovers the horrifying truth: whatever returned from space isn't her husband, not anymore.

[lunarw0rks]

Through The Ashes | Chapter One

Summary: You've been given an offer to join the 141 Task Force. Upon taking it, you find yourself ensnared with the mysterious masked man who won't take his eyes off you.

Warning(s): none for this chapter. just canon-typical activities.

A/N: This is my first post! I hope this is a decent first chapter. Lightly edited, so I apologize for typos/grammar errors. | Word Count: 2.7k

꒦꒷ MAIN MASTERLIST ꒦꒷ GHOST MASTERLIST ⋆ ⚘ 🕊 ˚✧ ₊˚ʚ next chapter | requests | ao3 ver. | playlist

He's a Good Soldier

The situation at hand was all very cryptic. A mysterious phone call offering you a job, and a location to meet. Everything about it was abnormal. What type of job were you sinking yourself into?

The faint R&B music rang through the bar you were seated in. You wondered if the unknown caller was going to show up at all. Maybe this was all a waste of your time. Anxiously, you glanced around, seeing only a few tables filled with patrons, and their conversations were only muffled clatters by this point.

You looked down at the glass in your hands, using the swirl of the ice as a distraction from your fried nerves.

A faint ding snaps you out of your thoughts, the bell above the entrance. Before you could look at the door, there he was. The contact. He was older than you expected, but well kept. Everything about him screamed that he was polished. Perhaps this wasn’t a fool's errand afterall.

He takes a brief glance around the bar before he speaks. The gruff voice catches you off guard at first, and so does the accent.

“John Price,” you expect him to extend his hand for a shake, but he doesn’t. “I’m the one who called about the job. I think my Task Force could use your skills for our high-profile operations.” He says, almost in a mutter, as if he was speaking through his beard.

You nod and examine the file he slides across the wooden table, opening it. 

Inside, the military files of his Task Force are inside, giving you a brief idea of who you’d be working with. None of them ring a bell to you, but why not keep an open mind?

It’s tempting to ask what the jobs will be, but you notice how cagey he’s being with his information already. 

You were given the offer, they obviously think your training and skills are useful, so why not give it a shot?

“When do I report, Sir?” You ask, finishing off your drink.

—

You were never one to let your nerves overcome you, but today they were. As you stood outside the base, you had to force yourself to push open the doors and walk inside. No one seems to bat an eye at first. You figured your best bet was to meet the contact from the bar, him being the only person you knew within this odd situation.

After a few minutes of wandering, your bag was beginning to strain your shoulder. Finally, you found what you were looking for. A room with the plaque, “Cpt. Price” on the front. You gave three quick knocks.

“Come in,” the voice from the bar calls, only this time muffled through a thick door.

You open the door slowly. His gaze shifts from the paperwork in front of him and then to you.

“You made it.” He attempts a warm smile and stands up to shake your hand, something he didn’t do during the secretive meeting in the bar.

“This place feels like a maze, Sir. But yes, I did make it.” You comment, trying your best to lighten the mood in the room. He was your superior now, and you needed to get a feel of the way things ran around here. He looked like a strict man, but it wasn’t obnoxious.

He walks around his large oak desk and motions you to follow. “I’ll take you to meet the rest of the team. Better do it now before they all scatter to God knows where.” He lets out a dry chuckle as he leads you through the corridors. Finally, after following for a few moments, he opened the double doors into the “Briefing Room”, or so the chalk label on the front stated. Upon the doors opening, you were greeted by a multitude of personalities all sitting together, all their eyes glued to their own paperwork, or a laptop or tablet.

Their eyes lifted, but only for a few moments. They were very intense when working, you could already tell.

“Attention everyone,” Price clears his throat, before moving his frame to reveal you to the group. “This is our newest addition. She’s going to assist us on our mission tomorrow, and possibly more in the future. Make her feel welcome.” Before you can speak, the Captain has left the room, assuming he went back to being nose deep into his paperwork.

You shuffled in your stance, feeling exposed. Now you are on your own. You hoped that you made a good first impression, or maybe they would forget you were there and carry on, either way would be more favorable than making enemies on the first day.

You set your bags down next to an empty chair at the end of the table, purposely seating yourself in an isolated spot. You looked around at the members of this Task Force, examining each of their bearings.

A voice snapped you out of your examination.

“You can sit over here, Lass.” A Scottish accent. Based on the files you examined in the bar, this must be MacTavish, if you were to go off their surnames. Your gaze shot up, seeing the man with a mohawk gesturing toward the chair next to him. Flashing a meek smile, you grabbed your bag and sat next to him.

“So… this is the whole Task Force?” You asked curiously, taking another glance at all of them.

He gives a nod and purses his lips, beginning to point at each of them as he named them off. If you were to pick the friendliest based on appearance alone, probably Garrick, or “Gaz”, as Soap told you to refer to him. 

Least friendly… Probably the burly man at the other end of the table, who’d been giving you an icy glare since you arrived. “Ghost”, they called him. What a strange codename, you thought to yourself. However, you weren’t about to tell him that to his face.

“We’re all pretty friendly here.” Soap continues, looking around with you. “Just don’t touch anyone’s things without permission, not talking from experience or anything.” He lets out a chuckle, and you could tell he was only trying to make you feel comfortable.

“I will take your word for it, Soap.” You state, giving a slow nod. He offers to show you your dorm, and you gladly follow, just wanting to get settled in as quickly as possible.

Soap takes your bag for you, carrying it the whole way there, though you felt like protesting it at first.

The room is smaller than you expected, but not awful to look at. There’s a simple bed, nightstand, and desk. Not having to share a bathroom is a plus, too. Soap nodded when he saw the tension in your shoulders reduce when the room was less distasteful than you expected.

“If you need help finding anything, I’m down the hall.” He sets your duffel bag on the bed and starts towards the door.

You stop him, having only one thing on your mind. “One question.” He stops in his tracks, raising his brow curiously. “That man in the mask… Is he always so…?” Before you can even finish, a grin spreads on Soap’s face, as if it wasn’t his first time answering this question.

“Yes. Ghost is always that way. But he’s a good soldier, and he won’t let you die out there.” Soap replies, before he closes the door behind him, leaving you to get settled into your new living situation. 

—

After unpacking your things into the small dresser, and setting out the minimal decor you brought along. You figured it was time to learn about this “operation” that brought you here in the first place.

When you reached the main workspace, some desks had computers, others didn’t. You sat at an empty one and scrubbed through the files Price gave you at the bar once more. You hadn’t looked at them since the plane ride, and that was many-hours-jetlagged-ago.

The intel describes Task Force 141’s known information on “El Sin Nombre”,  who is the end target. You furrowed your brows as you skimmed the intelligence. Las Almas? A cartel? What exactly were you getting yourself into? This wasn’t the military operation you were expecting, especially working with this specific team.

—

You sat in the mission briefing room, surrounded by your new team. This was the day, your first operation with the 141. You turn your attention to the projector screen in front of the table, where Captain Price is standing, preparing for today’s assignments.

“We’ve received a tip off from a reliable source about the whereabouts of one of El Sin Nombre’s warehouses.” Price begins, taking a coarse sip from his coffee thermos. “We are going to stealthily infiltrate the facility and place a bug devices on El Sin Nombre’s escort vehicles. You will not have execute authority, so stay undetected.” Price says it like it’s nothing, like that’s not a terrifying instruction. And of course, the stealth mission had to be your first with this team.

He scoops up the paperwork he had sitting on the table. “We’re heading out in an hour. Prepare yourself accordingly, soldiers.”

Price’s footsteps grow quieter as he leaves the room, forcing you to make an attempt to plan something with your squadmates. You turn to Soap, but he’s already made plans to work with Gaz. Fuck. Only one more option.

You curse yourself in your head and take a deep breath, before turning to Ghost, who hasn’t uttered a word to you yet at all. “So, I take it we’ll be partners out there…” You want to punch yourself for being so stiff with him. You’re a soldier, he’s a soldier, you’re working together. Get it together. 

He offers a grunt in response, his brown eyes scanning all the way to your bones, before he shifts his gaze back to the folder in front of him, as if he can’t bear to look at you any longer. You almost scoff. All that effort and overthinking for a grunt.

You begin to doubt what Soap told you about him. 

Maybe he’ll intentionally get you killed out there, since you’re clearly so unbearable to have a decent conversation with. At least that’s how Ghost was making it seem.

—

“Ghost, how copy?” Price’s voice rang through the radio attached to Ghost’s vest. You looked over, waiting for your cue to infiltrate the warehouse.

“All clear. Ready to breach.” His rough voice replied into the mic, before he advanced toward the perimeter, sneaking around the side of the building. He barely looked your way, unless to make sure you were keeping up with him.

Sweat formed on your fingertips, daring you to drop the rifle in your hands, but you were determined to get through this without mistakes.

“Two hostiles at the entrance,” you speak in a low tone as you peak around the corner you’re posted at. Ghost has no reaction, and waits for the hostiles to pass. Then, without a word, he slips around the corner, moving toward the entrance.

“The vehicles are down the dirt path. Stay with me.” He says plainly, sprinting down the hill, following the path. 

You use every ounce of energy to stay with his pace, placing your backs against a fence and waiting for the lot with the vehicles to clear. When the enemies disperse, you both split off, pulling the bug devices from your gear. You give a signal nod as you place them discreetly on the vehicles. In seconds, you’re both ready to move on.

Unexpectedly, you hear the footsteps of a hostile approaching the very spot you’re standing. If he sees you, this mission is over, and so are your lives. You contemplate taking him out silently, but you remember Price’s words during the briefing; You will not have execute authority, so stay undetected.

The enemy’s treads are getting closer. The gravel under his boots crunches louder as he’s approaching the car you’re standing beside. You feel a rush of dread course through you.

Just when you think you’re dead meat, Ghost’s gloved hand clamps down on your forearm, dragging you underneath the van he was beside. He gives a cold glare as you’re both sandwiched in your hiding spot, shoulder to shoulder, leg to leg. He’s watching the enemy’s feet pass you by as walks along. When it’s clear, you scoot out from under by your belly, feeling the gravel dig through the fabric of your shirt.

Ghost must’ve noticed the look of panic still written on your face. “Keep your head on, we’re not out of here yet.” His monotone voice yanks the overthinking away quickly.

You continue to follow him, making your way to the fence along the perimeter. Lucky for you, this location didn’t have very strong security. Not even a patrolman going along the fence. Ghost pulled out bolt cutters and cut his way through the chainlink, making a hole big enough for each of you to slip out.

Ghost reaches for his radio once more, not skipping a beat as the both of you jogged from the compound. 

“Mission success. Meeting you at the evac location now.”

—

One part of you wanted to celebrate a successful mission, but the other knew this was beginners luck. It’s a rarity for missions to go that smoothly. If Ghost hadn’t been there, and you were performing that stealth mission alone, you would’ve gotten caught, and that was weighing on you. 

Luckily, Ghost didn’t seem like much of a talker. For once that was going to be in your favor.

“Good job out there everyone. As long as the devices aren’t destroyed, we’ll be able to have surveillance on El Sin Nombre’s shipments and convoys.” Price states in a boastful fashion, giving everyone a supportive grin.

There was no point in dwelling on your mistakes out there. Everyone was content with the outcome, even if some didn’t show it much. Or at least one of them didn’t.

As you're seated on the sofa in the lounge, a beer bottle is handed to you from over your shoulder. “How do you think you did out there?” The accent hits your ears again, making you give a nod as you open the bottle.

“I think everything went… well?” You were unsure. 

Ghost almost looked as if he had a cheeky smirk under his mask as he watched the conversation from afar, but you couldn’t be too sure. His eyes didn’t give much away either. At least you knew it wasn’t just you he stared at. Each time you looked over, his eyes were glued onto something or someone else, as if he was examining everything around him, but not interacting. Like a phantom in the room, which you see move past the corner of your eye.

“Oh, come on. You did well. Nobody’s had any complaints about you yet.” Soap reassures you, maintaining the same friendly tone he had when he first offered you to sit next to him. 

At least you had one person who made an effort to talk with you each day. Price was your boss, so he had to. Gaz was welcoming too, but introverted. And Ghost was… living up to his name. A ghost. At least socially, he was.

You chuckled at Soap’s comment, because it was true. You were overthinking your decisions in the field, and there was no reason to.

The celebration didn’t last long. Some had a few beers and went off to bed, others stayed awake but went back to working. You were exhausted from your first day. New experiences, new people you were still getting used to.

As you laid in your bed, you thought about the moment you almost compromised the mission again. Ghost grabbing you without a second thought, saving your ass. Perhaps, it was as awkward for him as it was for you - the way you two were shoved against one another beneath the van. Or, it was instinct for him to save you, because he’s so experienced in his field.

You nearly physically shook the thoughts away as you rolled over, forcing yourself to get the rest your fatigued body was begging for.

[poordeadsejanus]

TBOSAS gave an intense look at the map of panem pre-president snow era, so I pieced it together to make a more official map than anything i've seen thus far. plus, i'm insane about fictional maps for literally no reason. [keep in mind, this is shitty screenshots that i've put together and the screen the map appears on (during lucky's weather report) appears to be rounded, so some of the proportions and such might be off. ] more stuff under the cut

so, these are the images i used to make this:

and i pieced them together as best i could, some of the borders, like the bottom right of 12 and the bottom of 5 became sort of a guessing game because they were covered up/hard to see.

doing that and cropping/pasting them together gave me this image (same as at the top of post)

red lines are clear country borders, yellow are district borders, purple is any of the areas i was unsure about. As we can see from this, districts 7, 10, and 13 (not labelled on this map because at this point in canon-time, it's 'gone') have no definite ending borders, so it's hard to even guess where they would end at. using this i made this more polished map using each district's colours that are listed on fandom dot com

the unclear edges are left blurred because really i don't know where they end...

we know that panem is formerly north america, so i laid the image over a map of north america and got this:

it took a little adjusting because again, my map is based off of a warped television screen, but, we end up with something like this. some interesting things to note is that a lot of coast has presumably eroded away as time passed -- we lost all of baja, and most of florida and socal, and some of virginia and north carolina, and many pieces of the mexican states, though none in their entirety . the places where panem extends over NA water spaces (districts 6, 7, 13) are either from receding water levels or translation issues from the warping of the in-movie screen... or, my own personal error, i guess lol.

again, as far as 7, 10, and 13, their end borders are up to speculation, but i'd imagine 7 extends up to near the edge of the northern canadian borders and maybe into alaska -- though i can't say because that's a huge chunk of space (it is the lumber district, though, so it probably goes as high as the trees are...). same goes for 10: i'd guess it goes south a bit more to near the nartual borders, but likely in any low-elevation areas (near the southern provinces) the sea has swallowed up the land. as for 13, it likely extends more near norther quebec and out toward the maritime provinces (though i'd estimate that most of those are either completely underwater or complete above it, so there's no islands going on). truly though, it's anyone's guess, so let me know your thoughts on it if you made it this far down!

future-panem, like during the events of the hunger games, definitely has changed district borders. we knows there's fencing and forbidden area, so the districts are definitely far smaller and there's space between them (no man's land) so that there is little-to-no communication between districts.

anyway, thanks for checking this out, i spent too much time on this to come out with very little practical use, but if you're like me and you like knowing where fictional locations are/how they're laid out, this is for you

[lisharchivez]

Hi! its me Fay

Personal archive for Chats or post replies or dialogue responses from our beloved Zayne/Li shen / Rei / Lee Seoeon from love and deep Space

and occasionally from Others as well

Its hard to keep on track since i do all these by myself

Feel free to help me out! I would be grateful!

guide

❄️Zayne ⭐Xavier 🐦‍⬛Sylus 🐚Rafayel

same cube coded ones are part of same occasions.

Archived chats so far

❄️Doctor's order

❄️Dry humor

❄️Key case

❄️Special dessert pt 1 pt 2

❄️Sophora

❄️Emoji trick

❄️Kitty Cards Bet

❄️waiting room

❄️new habit

❄️Magic and Miracle

❄️no sequel

❄️bouquet of ballpoint & pen(unfin)

❄️Masquerade ball

❄️Notes

❄️Tail tales

❄️Minty (mint meow badge)

❄️Examination report

❄️Aromatherapy

❄️Feed the Squirrel

❄️snowman's trip(plushie)

❄️A Vote

⚠️bonus

❄️Who keeps the mug[Event]

❄️Left on read

🐦‍⬛ Countdown reminder

🐦‍⬛ special reminders

❄️Wind Field Impact[GLINT PHOTOBOOTH]

🐦‍⬛Extreme Sports[GLINT PHOTOBOOTH]

🐦‍⬛Just a little Joke 2.0

🐦‍⬛Electronic pet

❄️Romance Advisor

❄️saying goodnight 💞66

Emoji edition

Snowman laying down shaking head "NO" caption pt 1 pt 2

not listening

time for meds

Tea

....

Archived posts so far

Moments -

❄️the snow stopped

❄️Traffic jam

❄️Dusk or Dawn

❄️Cat's blessing

❄️Rabbit escaped

❄️it's fun and easy (first plushie)

❄️let's go home (3 plushie)

❄️angry mc obtained (No plushie)

❄️goodluck (1st SSR meow badge)

❄️has anyone seen my socks

❄️haggle through Language barrier

❄️Queueing [aff 62]

❄️Trial and error

❄️Diseased Mind

❄️Drink Plenty of water

❄️Stroll on the road

❄️surprise

❄️someone said we were only taking picture-

❄️Earbuds are broken[snapshot same pose]

❄️Reminders

❄️Philosophers[snapshot specific duo pose]

❄️I'm now accustomed to [snapshot follow up]

❄️Squirrel brought a friend[related to feed the squirrel chat]

❄️Power suddenly went out

❄️Medium rare

❄️Three notification for light meal

❄️Captchas aren't scientific

1️⃣Jenna,Tara,Greyson,Thomas pt1 pt2

❄️between the results of medical exam and theoretical exam-

🟪 🐦‍⬛tweak smile

🟪❄️learned a lot of weird trivia

🟪⭐the book from beginner to expert

🟪🐚time to graduate

🐦‍⬛just woke up

🐦‍⬛ sunset

🐦‍⬛ Ammo Box Grill

🐦‍⬛ Not a Tiger[aff 23]

❄️ Fun thing [aff 77]

🐦‍⬛Goblet [aff 31]

❄️ paper penguin [aff 58]

⭐holding hands can shock U

🐦‍⬛Auction[aff 27]

🐦‍⬛mechanical crow likes shiny things

❄️waiting at the concert

🐦‍⬛ MC's birthday - Sylus

🐦‍⬛ heatwave

❄️Mild myopia

🐦‍⬛lil S pet store

🐦‍⬛most fun part of kitty card

🐦‍⬛Crows aren't actually black

EVENT edition -

[ Twinkle.Co HeartworkRoutine]

Ready to row [Event chat]

After you get your first plushie at soul catcher [post]

🟠After you finish chapter 2 [posts]

After the rain

Parterre day trip[Rafayel]

Great for a relaxing run[Xavier]

Yunshan's Charm

Trip invitation [event chat]

Limited edition pack design

Partner Go Go

Adventure Above Clouds

Moonlit Orchid Day

[taralen]

Why I draw Spamton the way I do and in defense of the "Tumblr sexyman" Spamton G. Spamton. An ESSAY.

EDIT 2/3/24 - Fixed some grammatical errors, changed font colors to make them easier to read against a white background, and reframed some of my arguments, especially regarding the "Yaoi style" portion, as it came across as ignorant and spiteful.

I follow the #spamton tag here, and I hate to say it, but it's full of artists jabbing at other artists who so happen to draw Spamton handsome. I see comments like, "No, he's a middle-aged sleazeball who is grungy and dirty." Often, these depictions show him with graying hair, ratty clothes, and covered in filth and grime. While there is nothing inherently wrong about drawing him this way, I find it disingenuous that the same people who draw him this way criticize people who draw him more handsome and or clean-cut because this depiction is even less based on his canon appearance than someone simply drawing him more realistically proportioned and with a pleasing visage (the definition of what this is varies by artist, but they're all often reduced to just "tumblr sexyman.") I see similar comments by people who draw him in what they may describe as "disgusting" or a "dirty scammer."

If Toby intended for Spamton to look dirty and gross, he would have simply gone with a similar design route to this character as an NPC in Undertale.

Toby or other official arts never depict him with the following, even though I see it in fan art all the time:

Ball-jointed hands. Some artists draw them properly and make them look super cool. Simple lines aren't how they look in reality, but I get why people do that. Either way, it's not canon.

Dirty with tattered clothes. Spamton is only ever shown with a black blazer. It's debatable if he wears pants, but Toby has also drawn him with a collared shirt and tie.

Graying hair. Should be obvious. He's only ever seen with jet-black hair.

Overweight/Fat. While some fan depictions of this are cute, it's not canon. Spamton is always drawn thin but not necessarily in shape.

Buff. Same as the above. It looks really good in some fanart but is also not canon.

Tail. It can look really, really cute, but not canon for him or any of the Addisons.

Feathers. Only Swatch and the Swatchlings are depicted with feathers in Cyber World.

"40+ years old" - There is zero evidence of this in-game or in official merchandise or media. This assumption apparently comes from people assuming that his birthday would be the same as the first "spam email," which (at the time of this writing) was 46 years ago. This is a false equivalency since there is no indication that Spamton has any associations with our real-world history of spam emails. It should also be noted that this was not a true spam email. The only thing closest to Spamton in association with real spam email history may be his favorite year, 1997, in which spam marketing emails became frequent nuisances. However, actions to stop spam mail started in 1996, and it was by the 2000s that they became a serious concern because technology had since advanced. If he were truly born in 1978, he would only be 19 by 1997. While not impossible, it's not how most people see him in his Big Shot years of barely just entering adulthood. Also, as someone who has lived through most of the 90s, I can attest to a lot of this. Spam stuff existed, but news reports only heavily got into it by the 2000s.

100% Inorganic or Robot. While a cool idea, there is more evidence against this, like his ability to eat, sleep, and genuinely feel pain.

Boobs. I get most people who do this are doing it for fun, but it's not canon to his design, lol.

Tall. The most obvious one. Spamton is below average height, as made evident by his nearly 1:1 scale with Kris, a teenager.

Toddler-sized. Same as above. I won't lie that it can be drawn super cute, though. Haha!

With all that being said, why is it such a contention among his fans to depict him as handsome?

There is evidence to support that Spamton is at least, to some degree, good-looking but unconventionally attractive based on several sources. It should be noted that people often use his shop sprite as the best representation of his head, but this isn't accurate, either. In Undertale and Deltarune, because of its cartoonish sprites, it shouldn't surprise anyone that Spamton's are the most inaccurate and change frequently. Another user posted an entire comparison of all his sprites and how drastically inconsistent they are. I tried searching through my likes for this, but I can't find it. If anyone finds this, please link or reblog it to this post. Anyway, the intent of the post was to show artists that there are numerous different ways you can interpret Spamton's design with what's provided in the game, alone.

Stuff people often miss that is canon:

Lips. Believe it or not, this bastard's got kissable lips. Toby's recent art and his Neo attack are proof of this.

Eyes under the glasses. Seen in his sprite of going "BIG SHOT" the first time with Kris. It also hints at heterochromia because they contrast in color with yellow pupils under the pink and pink under the yellow.

NEO has no visible jaw hinge line. Only puppet Spamton does. Big Shot Spamton doesn't have one, either.

NEO's glasses' colors are reversed, and they are pince-nez style.

Androgynous sense of fashion. This is the least missed one, but it's worth mentioning. Spamton has no issues wearing pink, a color nowadays associated with women, and the NEO body has fabulous heels in addition to mostly being a magenta pink. The dress on the mannequin that greatly resembles him (and may hint at him being a white Addison before) shows a pretty dress that mirrors the one Mettaton wore in Undertale.

So then, WHY is he being depicted as handsome or unconventionally good-looking a BAD thing?

There really shouldn't be an issue with it at all. It's less offensive and technically more canon than many of the supposed depictions of him being a sleazebag who looks like he hasn't showered in a century and is hooked up on drugs or booze. You don't become a media darling without a charming personality. Mettaton only got successful in Undertale before he got his EX body because there was literally nothing else the people could watch. Spamton, on the other hand, was competing against many, so he had to stand out and look good even with the help of Mike (and possibly Tenna).

I often see people make this very reductive argument that it's a "yaoi style." This is by far one of the stupidest arguments I've ever seen. Drawing good-looking men is NOT equivalent to liking Yaoi. There are plenty of other genres of Asian-origin or Anime-styled media that feature pretty boys that have nothing to do with Boy's Love. Even Shounen anime has some bishies. Drawing bishounen-style male characters is a design choice and does not indicate someone's interest in Yaoi media. I swear, I have never seen this problem with Eastern fans. It's rude to lump people with similar art styles under something most people who make this claim don't even understand. I've seen people make upset comments about other people calling their style stuff like "Cal-Arts" even if they never went to Cal-Arts or like the media produced by them. It's the same principle. Stop lumping entire artists under one umbrella.

I draw him handsome because it's simply the way I see him. I love many other depictions of him, undoubtedly, and I even have a sticker set that depicts him with the graying hair, but it looks really good anyway. My point is, the fact that people who draw him dark and handsome shouldn't be scrutinized any more than people who draw him way more off base.

My personal contentions with the assumption he is a "dirty sleazebag old man."

I find this absolutely hilarious because this is a genuine stereotype and stock character of people similar to him. The douchebag salesman is a trope that's been around for a long time, but people don't seem to realize that this is a caricature and not representative of real salespeople.

Go to any @$%^ing department store or even an electronics one. Do you ever see anyone selling you stuff looking like they crawled out of the trash? Most are lower-class people who can't find any other job, meaning they are stuck with sales. It takes skill to be a good salesman, and I hate to brag, but I can probably sell you a #@$%ing soap bar and convince you that the extra $10 you're spending on it over a drugstore brand is better for your hands by deeply moisturizing them through herbal extracts and only "naturally" derived cleansing agents. Your hands are dry from the cold, drawing moisture out of them, so the investment would be worth it for the health of your skin during this harsh winter season. Why risk a drugstore brand that will only make your hands feel even rougher, flakier, and cracked? Stuff like this requires you to look someone in the eyes and observe who they are—their body language, way of carrying themselves, and the cadence of how they respond to your words. Does it always work? No. However, do you think anyone would $%^&ing buy ANY LEGAL PRODUCT if a salesperson looked like they were a shady crack dealer who was suspicious as %^&( to deal with? NO. It's a stereotype caricature for a REASON. It's meant to demean the reality of the salesperson who is forced to peddle a stupid product for a living. It's hard, and if anything, GET MAD at the people who are the ones making the crappy product! Yeah, some salesmen are bad at their jobs, but do you really believe that Cyber City's #1 RATED SALESMAN got there from being mediocre?! He may have gotten outside help for something that Toby never made clear, but he definitely does NOT lack the personality to make a great salesman. And believe it or not, there is plenty of evidence to prove he WASN'T bad at it! The other NPCs sell stuff that was once his goods but with his labels removed, and based on his statement of wanting to "make his own deals," this heavily implies he was NOT selling products he wanted to sell before he became a Big Shot. He has a strong sense of pride in the way he sees and presents himself, and I think this may be overlooked by people who make him look as ratty as possible.

I will also CLEARLY state this but this depiction overall does several of the following, which I KNOW many people will say is bad:

Ageism. Why do so many people, mostly Zoomers, assume that a man in his 40s is washed-up, gross, or even considered old? I've seen hotter men in their 40s than some young men in their early 20s.

Downplays his mental health struggles. One of the best things about Spamton is how he DOESN'T play into just the "sleazebag" stereotype. Once we go into his shop, we see that he is truly just a very broken man. His theme song is a FARCE to try and convince you that he's tougher than he really is.

Classist/Poor-Shaming. The assumption that a homeless person has to have no sense of cleanliness. Please, for the love of all that is good, meet actual homeless people. Not all of them are like this. Spamton clearly keeps himself rather clean for someone who dumpster dives. He is trying to stay true to himself, and his sense of self is one of pride. There is no dialogue or description to imply he smells or lacks proper hygiene.

Again, while there is nothing inherently wrong with drawing him this way, I just want people to be more aware of why they draw him this way. Think of it like a thought experiment to reflect on why you see him the way you do. How I draw Spamton comes from a place of deep empathy, love, and life experiences I've had in sales in addition to ALWAYS being customer-facing, meaning I know what works and what doesn't for over a DECADE. It's rather bizarre to me that people who claim to be big fans of him draw him in such a demeaning way that goes beyond the canon depiction and lowers him to absolute dirt, almost like beating this character with the ugly stick just because it's "funny." Is he a tragic character to you? Or is he simply a clown to laugh at for his failures and hardships? How we depict and see people is utterly fascinating because it reflects in real life, too.

You can take the exact same person and show them to different groups of people, and they will all see the same person differently. They don't have to be artists, but they tend to vary if you ask their opinions. For example, I think the actor Mads Mikkelsen is very attractive, but I know many who wouldn't understand why. A guy I've had a crush on for years is one of the hottest men ever to me, but a friend of mine called him "just a guy."

I fully understand that some people find the way I draw him stupid. It is what it is. I can't force you to like it.

I'm simply trying to point out my reasonings for why I draw him this way, and I would like others to think about their methods, too, and NOT to bash other people outright or go "ewww Yaoi tumblr sexyman" just because someone doesn't depict him with stereotypical traits or as "100% canon style" (which is mostly just copying the game's sprite style.)

[judesmoonbeauty]

Ghost House Report: A Requiem For You - Harrison Gray Premium End

Fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors. Cybird owns everything. Feel free to re-blog, but please do not post my translations elsewhere. If you'd like to be added to my translations tag list, please comment below. Thank you, for you support! ☾.

Harrison: So, what is the head butler be searching for in his master’s hidden room?

Robert formed a small circle with my fingers.

Robert’s Ghost: It’s a ring about this big.

Robert’s Ghost: It was to be a gift for my lover.

(…….My chest tightens…….Robert’s regret…….feelings for his girlfriend…..)

Robert’s Ghost: That is what I held onto on the promised day.

Robert’s Ghost: I was going to propose……after we escaped the mansion.

Harrison: …..That so.

Harry looks around the room.

Harrison: If it’s something small like a ring, then it’s got to be in this chest.

One by one, Harry opened the drawers, starting from the top and rummaged through them.

(……Ugh….something’s wrong, I’ve been in pain for a while now.)

(It’s more than just Robert’s feelings…..)

Robert’s Ghost: …..Tss.

Harrison: As expected of a nobleman, it’s packed with jewelry.

Harrison: Robert, the ring you had…..is this it?

Harry holds up a simple ring box and opens it.

There shining was an elegant and pretty ring.

Robert’s Ghost: ….Yes….yes, that’s it….ahhh…

Harrison: What’s up?

Robert’s Ghost: ……It’s a little hard to breath…….

(….Haa, Haa……..ha, I need to stay calm….)

Harrison: Oi, is Kate alright?

Robert’s Ghost: The young lady is very kind….she’s attuned with my emotions.

Robert’s Ghost: It’s an odd reaction……Perhaps, because she is kind

Robert’s Ghost: The painful feelings that I’ve shared have been amplified…..I think it’s affected her body.

Robert’s Ghost: …..I’m like this….I’ve never possessed a body for this long….this is completely unexpected.

(…..Harry….)

Unable to stand, my body collapses.

Harrison: Kate!

Holding me in his arms, Harry desperately calls out to me.

Harrison: Kate! Can you hear me? Kate!

Harrison: Damn it, Oi Robert! You said Kate wasn’t in danger?!

Robert’s Ghost: …..Ha, I…..I’m trying to leave the young lady’s body…..

Robert’s Ghost: The Misses feelings…..are too linked to mine…..my soul has become stronger…..

Robert’s Ghost: …Tss, because of this….the young lady’s soul has weakened…….to be expelled from her body….

Harrison: ! Kate! Hold On! Kate!

Harry keeps calling out to me as he holds me tightly.

(….Harry’s voice….is distant….)

Robert’s Ghost: We have to give…..the young lady’s will power back….

Robert’s Ghost: Something…..something that will move her heart….that’ll prick her…

(”…..Losing you would leave a bad taste in my mouth. Do your best.”)

(…..Robert…..?)

Harrison: Kate!

I feel a slightly warm sensation on my cheek.

(….H…arr……y’s……lips….?)

I can feel his brushing back my hair, the warmth of his skin as he repeatedly kisses and rubs my cheek, as if through a thin veil.

Harrison: Kate, stay strong!

Harrison: ……Don’t……leave me all alone in the darkness….

(……That’s right….)

I decided not to let Harry’s hand go, the moment I decided to stay at Crown Castle.

I’d hang on no matter what and live by Harry’s side.

(….H, how …..could I….let go….of….this place….)

Harrison: Kate….please….please come back…..

(Mmm……)

Spurned on by Harry’s earnest feelings, I struggle to regain my consciousness.

Soon after, I could clearly feel Harry’s warmth —.

My body feels so much better.

(….Ah…..my body’s sensations are returning….)

Kate: ….H…arry….

Harrison: ! Kate!

Kate: ….Harry…I’m sorry….for worrying you…

He held me tightly.

Harrison: ….No, it’s fine. More importantly, is your body okay?

Kate: …..It’s alright….your voice helped me Harry……Thank you.

Harrison: …..That’s good.

Harry's arms felt like they were trembling a bit as he answered while still holding me.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Well, I’m glad I was able to escape.

Kate & Harrison: !

When I heard a voice coming from above, I looked up and saw Robert’s ghost in a butler's uniform floating in the air.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Very good. Personally, I had no desire to spend the rest of my life in a woman’s body.

(…….Although you say such rude things.)

Kate: Robert, thank you……for encouraging me.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Thank you? Haha, what are you saying?

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Don’t mistake me. If you weren’t safe, my wishes wouldn’t be fulfilled.

Harrison: …..Robert, you’re a really crafty guy.

Contrary to Harry’s words, his gaze was kind.

(Harry must know Robert’s words were a lie.)

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Hehe, I’ll take that as a compliment.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Well, your lover seems to be safe, I hope you’ll fulfill my wish as promised.

Harrison: Oh, what should I do with the ring?

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Naturally, I’d like to give it to my love.

With Harry supporting me, we followed after Robert -

As we moved closer to the portrait of the young woman, sobbing could be heard.

Harrison: …..Right, I get it.

Harrison: In reality, Robert you wanted to give it to her yourself.

Harrison: Since you can’t hold this, I’ll help you.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: ….Thank you for your time.

Harry takes the ring out of the ring box and holds it up towards the portrait.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: My Lady….I’m so sorry for hurting you.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: I couldn’t give this to you on that day, but now - These are my honest feelings. Will you please accept them?

Touching the ring to the portrait -

Harrison: ….!

The ring Harry held suddenly disappeared-

A ring of the same design appeared on the left hand of the portrait, which hadn’t been there before.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: ….Seems like she’s happy with it.

Kate: Ah…..her sobbing stopped….can you hear her calm voice?

Harrison: …..Yeah, I can hear it too.

Lady in the Portrait: ……Robert, I’m sorry for doubting you.

Lady in the Portrait: ….I’m very happy….thank you…..

Robert’s Floating Ghost: This time, let’s be happy together….in the new world where no one can get in our way.

Lady in the Portrait: Yes….this time….please take me with you……as long as we can be together……anywhere…

Then something like white smoke came out from the portrait -

Robert hugged her lovingly.

(The girl’s…..ghost?)

Robert’s Floating Ghost: …I won’t make my lover said anymore.

Robert whispered softly and then turned to us.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: Thank you. I’m so grateful to have met you both.

Robert’s Floating Ghost: ….I’d like to thank you for your kind hearts.

Robert hugged his lover’s spirit even tighter, and eventually they became one -

Suddenly disappearing.

Harrison: ……They’ve both, gone away.

Harrison: What’s wrong?

A thin plume of smoke was rose by my feet.

When I looked down, I saw an old silver coin on the floor that was about to disappear.

Kate: Oh, this silver coin….Robert possessed me when I first picked it up.

Kate: Maybe it was a piece of Robert’s soul.

Harrison: …..That guy really doesn’t have anymore regrets or attachments in this world.

Kate: Yeah, you’re right.

The silver coin along with the smoke would eventually completely disappear.

Looking beyond the smoke, the lady in the portrait was smiling.

Kate: ……The lady, she has such a lovely smile. She’s happy.

Harrison: Yea, so it is. Her long-held wish has come true.

Kate: ….This time, they’ll be happy together.

As I uttered my prayer, Harry’s hand tightened around my waist.

Afterwards, we met up with the others, we investigated the hidden room once again, and collected any evidence that could reveal the secrets of the mansion.

It seems that the "human experiments" that Robert was talking about were related to cursed research -

Roger was so delighted that he said, “Yes, I’ve found valuable information!”

Harrison: ….So, any problems with your body since then?

Harry offered me a warm cup of milk tea and sat down next to me on the bed.

Kate: ….Thank you. Thanks to you Harry, I’m fine.

(….. I feel like I haven't fully regained feeling in my limbs yet.)

(It’s my body after all, so it’ll recover in no time.)

As I took the cup with slightly trembling hands, his hands wrapped around mine.

(…It’s warm.)

As I feel the warmth, I start to relax -

Harrison: …I’m sorry. I knew it was impossible.

The cup was snatched away.

Kate: Huh? Ah.

Harry grabbed my hands still in mid-air and trapped me in his arms.

Harrison: I wanted to help you so much during your rough time…..but didn’t have the luxury of doing so.

Harry's heart beats faster as he whispers, and my own heart also speeds up and overlaps with his.

Harrison: …I was terrified when I thought you might disappear.

Harrison: That is some kind of lie or threat.

Harry's voice was painfully serious as he spoke.

( - All this time.)

(Harry’s desperately trying to stay calm.)

I wasn't just imagining it because Harry's arms were trembling slightly.

My lover - he’s a kind person who’s good at lying and saying, “It's okay, it’s not a big deal.”*

I hug Harry back with my still weakened arms.

Kate: Back then….just as I was going to black out, I heard your voice Harry.

Kate: Harry it was….your warmth, your touch and thoughts …that brought me back.

Kate: ….Because of you, I’m still here. So don’t worry, I won’t leave your side.

Kate: Because aren’t I like the sun that shines upon you Harry?

Harrison: …….

( - It’s embarrassing to say that myself.)

Kate: Sorry, I got carried away, forget I said anything - Whoa!

I was suddenly pushed down, the bed creaking.

The mint-colored eyes looked down at me wavering slightly.

Harrison: …You really won’t leave?

Kate: Of course, I’m going to stick to you Harry, no matter what.

Harrison: Right….well then.

As his eyes grew with heat, my hands wove with his and the sheets.

Harrison: Prove it to me. Don’t leave me Kate.

Harrison: Right here, right now. Until I’m satisfied.

Harrison: ….Be prepared for tonight.

*Since we've had their second wedding event, I was really hoping that they would use the term husband/wife for Harry & Kate in this event, but there is no indication this event is following that event, and that verbiage is never used, so I chose to stick with lover for the entire translation.

[Master List] [Epilogue]

Tag List: @theimaginativelyreticent @sapphire-323 @sh0jun @letter-from-afar

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