#ELYAN IS HERE!!

[justaz]

one of my fav tropes in merlin fanfic is when merlin gets turned into a child and is literally terrified of the knights and arthur (aka his bestest of friends (excluding gwen whoops sorry my love i adore you i promise)) and they're just like "wtf????" and then merlin's little child self isn't in control of his magic and they just go "oooohhhh that makes sense" and i was thinking about it and i need one of those fics where it happens when they're all just chilling in the woods, not in their armor or anything and they just sit around and tell stories to merlin to get him to relax bc he was a bit frightened when he appeared in the woods with a bunch of random men.

gwaine telling the story of how he met merlin and arthur and the tavern brawl and how they won and little merlins just like "whoaaaa i never win any of my fights" and gwaine chuckles and looks at this like seven/eight year old like "and what fights have you got into?" and merlin just shrugs all sheepishly like "well, maybe not fights, but the kids in ealdor don't really like me. they throw stones and call me names and follow me into the woods to hurt me. i never win those fights, there's always too many of them...will fights for me tho!! he usually also gets beat up but he can actually fight so..." and theyre all just like :((( fuck :(( especially arthur who knows how much will meant to merlin but he never understood why

merlin also mentions how they call him names like freak or bastard but his mom won't tell him what the second one means. gwaine is like "you know, all the kids in ealdor are around our age now. we should go and teach them a lesson" and little merlin gasps and grabs gwaine's arm and is like "no! D: that's so mean!" and the knights are just like yep. that's our merlin. complete sweetheart. anyways what i mean is just them growing closer and maybe little merlin sees a flash of red in the distance and freaks and tells them all to run and hide with him which they do while completely befuddled. when they ask him why he's scared merlin just whispers "it's a knight, I saw him. he's from camelot" and the knights are like ??? and merlin looks at them like their crazy "you know how knights from camelot are! they're cruel. they'll kill us the moment they see us. stay quiet!"

anyways idk where i was going with this. ig i don't really need a fic like this i just wanted to get this idea down and out there. maybe leon tries to calm merlin and is like "don't worry, knights of camelot protect us. i mean, we're knights of camelot and we'd never hurt you." and merlin just turns and stares at him like "you're a knight?" and he nods and merlin turns to the rest and is like "you're all knights? of camelot?" and they nod and merlin stands there for a minute before booking it and hiding in the woods. they spend all afternoon and evening searching for him. merlin refuses to come out. but you know he can't exactly survive in the woods for long so he starts wandering when the sound of their footsteps fade and somehow finds himself in gwen's care. look idk my vision was little merlin sitting with the knights and becoming friends and then the knights seeing merlin terrified of knights of camelot idk what happens next stop hounding me get off my back

[atdawn]

MERLIN | 5.06 The Dark Tower

[bisclavret]

like many who have suffered at the hands of bbc merlin before me, i recently indulged in a thought experiment in which i outlined my own version of seasons 3-5 that stay thematically and tonally in line with the show (except they're less fucking stupid). but then i quickly realized that focusing on details is pointless: all you need is to solve the one Big Problem the show has, and the rest will follow. the problem in question? ✨morgana✨

i like the first two seasons. s1 achieves what it sets out to do and has fun while doing it, and s2, while flawed, sets up a ton of potential that the following seasons unfortunately squander, beginning with the insidious season 3. you can only distract me with cute knights and goblins and fart jokes for so long before i start seeing through you, evil, evil season of television.

my hypothesis is that if the writers had crafted s3 morgana into anything more sympathetic than a violent half-alive poltergeist that can never be reasoned with because she's suddenly terminally off her rocker, everything would've fallen into place. a sympathetic morgana would've made real, valid arguments against uther (and arthur) that wouldn't just be the ramblings of a woman possessed. her betrayal of arthur would have stemmed from her feeling increasingly morally superior to him because of his complacency in the face of their father's tyranny. under morgause's guidance she would stop believing that arthur is capable of change, and the whole point would be that she might actually be right. arthur would have to actively try and prove her wrong, instead of getting praised for doing the bare minimum because the bar is on the floor.

furthermore, morgana's prophetic dream about arthur and gwen becoming king and queen and her decision to prevent this however she can is a direct parallel to merlin learning about that same prophecy and making it happen by any means necessary. merlin's desires about his and arthur's futures are subtextually fueled by gay love and devotion, so why couldn't morgana's be? why couldn't she properly express her bitterness that arthur gets to be with gwen in a way she can't "took gwen away" from her, instead of suddenly declaring that gwen is nothing more than a servant, after two seasons of demonstrating again and again that she loves, values, and respects gwen more than anyone else in that godforsaken castle?

following this, an angry and emotionally volatile but still sensible morgana asking gwen to stay by her side during the coup of the castle in the s3 finale and gwen going behind her back to help arthur and the knights would've hurt like a bitch. double-sided betrayal! gwen having a real plot! the proper beginnings of a toxic yuri that would shape a generation!

then there's the utter hubris of having morgana shoot arrows at the same civilians she worried herself sick over for 2 seasons — even morgan, her medieval counterpart that was rooted in every sexist trope in existence, doesn't just go around killing senselessly but instead has (often petty!) personal vendettas against gwen, arthur, and the knights. morgana had every right to be sick of the pretensions around chivalry in camelot (she was always quick to mock it, even in s1), and to lash out at the knights and soldiers after years of feeling powerless in a castle full of armed men that blindly followed her oppressor. the show conveniently forgets that morgana was victimized as a woman as well as a sorcerer those first 2 seasons.

but like i said, this is not just about morgana. allowing her to remain a real and multifaceted character even as she betrays everyone in pursuit of her ambitions would've given the rest of the core four more interesting conflict to work with: merlin because he would have to experience real consequences to his actions, arthur because he would watch his sister go against his father (and his knights, and his birthright) and experience some actual internal dilemmas about it, and gwen because she would be forced to choose between morgana and arthur without the pretense that it's an obvious or easy choice for her to make.

even morgause and gaius would come off more interesting as mentors: neither one inherently evil or inherently good, both jaded by events that happened before our protagonists were even born, both heavily influencing morgana and merlin into fulfilling roles that they think are appropriate, but that morgana and merlin may not have chosen for themselves had they not been under their care.

you get the gist. if the show followed its own setup, morgana's mistakes wouldn't lie in cheap and senseless acts of violence but in alienating the people she loves because she is too hurt and jaded to trust them. meanwhile, everybody else would feel guilt over "failing" her and yet they would be too caught up in their own (sometimes flawed!) beliefs of right and wrong to truly see her point of view.

arthur would convince himself it was sorcery that corrupted her. merlin would know that isn't true but he wouldn't be able to argue without confessing everything, which is the defining conflict between him and morgana and it's cheapened when she's just an evil witch caricature and merlin is framed as inherently virtuous in contrast. gwen, too, would become a more active participant in her own life by choosing arthur over morgana and choosing to rule camelot with him instead of just waiting politely to see where things go.

and, of course, uther's downfall and death would be quick, final, and completely earned — when and why did the show even decide he of all people was the sympathetic villain, anyway?

lastly, and perhaps controversially, i think morgana should've learned merlin's true identity by season 4. her being the first of the main characters to find out makes perfect sense considering their shared history and their interconnected and mirrored arcs. even the show seems to agree, considering she does find out a little before arthur. but the narrative itself tried pointing flashing neon arrows towards this way earlier — there is a whole entire episode in s4 where merlin being emrys is repeatedly spelled out for morgana and she still isn't allowed to see it. that episode makes her look like the stupidest person to ever live, which is pretty funny im not gonna lie, but also another frustrating thing in the endless string of frustrating things that make up this show.

morgana learning that merlin has magic would've transformed the source of merlin's anxiety from a crippling fear of being outed someday to the crippling fear of knowing she could out him at any moment. this would make him want to beat her to the punch (perhaps he'd consider killing her for a minute and decide against it because she isn't a cartoonishly insane evil person in my version of events) and maybe he would even feel some tentative excitement at the idea of coming clean, now that it seems inevitable. after all, he always intended to tell arthur eventually! and i think gaius would have to admit outright that he does not want merlin to tell arthur he has magic because he, gaius, simply cannot risk such a gamble. it would be so interesting to see gaius and merlin clash and disagree once it becomes obvious that it's not merlin that isn't ready for the reveal, it's gaius. delicious!

with morgana's knowledge looming, things would inevitably spiral into a magic reveal by the end of season 4. i picture this season as an absolute mess of miscommunication between everyone at camelot, which is, y'know, canon. growing increasingly cunning and vengeful, morgana would use this tension to her advantage, destabilizing the court from the outside while she creates alliances with other sorcerers outside of camelot (instead of living alone in a hovel for no reason — morgana le fay i'm sorry i'm so sorry they gave you agravaine instead of your all-female entourage oh my god).

and here's where the events would change beyond recognition (aka here's where the meta becomes the fanfic i refuse to write). picture it with me: a militia of sorcerers infiltrates camelot and arthur and gwen have to set aside their differences (assuming gwen kissing lancelot and arthur overreacting happens, which it should) for the good of the kingdom as well as for love. picture high priestess morgana in her element, side by side with a bunch of misfit sorcerers that aren't so easily vilified, chopping down camelot's soldiers and knights and assuredly making their way to the newly-minted king.

then, just as it starts to seem that all hope is lost, in swoops merlin (the actual merlin, not his old fart disguise) on dragonback (kilgharrah hates morgana so much i know his sexist ass would stoop to anything to stop her)!!! imagine merlin showing off the extent of his powers in front of everyone and preventing the sorcerers from getting any further, declaring loud and clear that camelot is protected by him, by emrys. imagine that display of power alone being enough to send everyone home.

imagine the loyalties clearly drawn: merlin on arthur's side, morgana on the sorcerers'. imagine arthur, feeling confused and betrayed by everyone at this point, banishing merlin despite everything he's done for him in the angstiest, most emotionally dysregulated scene the show had ever put to screen. imagine merlin starting season 5 free at last but very lonesome, an embittered dragonlord like his father. imagine the absolute mess camelot would become without him, even with gwen — now queen guinevere — there to pick up the slack. imagine arthur actually earning merlin back, finally growing into his role as king as he does so. imagine the reunion.

all this and more could've been not just possible but inevitable if morgana was allowed to remain a complex character that is neither inherently good nor inherently evil: it was undeniably the biased and one-note treatment of morgana's downfall by the writers that set the precedent for literally everything else that happened after merlin chose to poison her. the show wouldn't have even had to jeopardize its tone or the monster-of-the-week vibe, all it would've had to do is admit that even the "good guys" are capable of mistakes and what makes them good is the ability to feel remorse and change for the better. (as opposed to uther, who was miles beyond redemption since way before the pilot and deserved to lose everything and die alone. OBVIOUSLY???)

in a world where morgana remains multifaceted and sympathetic, mordred would get a better arc as well, so if we really wanted to, we could still end on the same tragic note that the show ended on. with so much harm inflicted onto so many innocent people by the pendragons for so long (including mordred and the many druids and sorcerers that raised him), it could realistically end up being a little too late for anything more than one shining glimpse of king arthur and the sorcerer merlin's short-lived golden age before fate catches up to them. glimpsing that reality just to immediately lose it would've been far more satisfying and far more tragic than whatever the writers thought they were doing with all that pointless carrot-dangling.

and finally, an ending in line with morgana's new and improved arc. in this version, rather than bleeding out on the forest floor alone, she would channel the morgan le fay we know from the legends: sobered up by the reality of her brother dying, she would use her high priestess status (and perhaps also her pendragon status) to be granted passage over to avalon alongside arthur on the boat — a one-way ride — just to make sure he gets there safely. this is her penance for the harm she has caused, the same way arthur's penance is to die and leave the true ruler of camelot (gwen) behind to achieve everything he was too slow and indecisive to build while he still had time.

merlin's penance, then, would be to stay behind and watch them cross over without him, waiting and waiting and waiting until they come back or until he can finally join them. which is a bit fucking harsh if i'm honest, so i'd at least make it slightly more faithful to the legends by having him return as an old man and letting him take a long nap under a tree by the shore, his body slowly enveloped by vines like the cobwebbed fisher king in 3x08, never fully sure if he's dreaming or if there really are strange shapes fading in and out of the fog over the lake. still tragic, but nevertheless a little more open-ended and whimsical than [TRUCK NOISES] THE END!

[poisonedfate]

bbc merlin - 04x05 His Father's Son

obsessed with this scene for many reasons, but especially for the fact that elyan got voted class president and is giving this whole speech by himself while the rest of them just stare and nod. i think it's beautiful. additionally - merlin's little pose he pulls in the last gif.

[msphagime]

Season 4 has been a giant "spot the ship interactions" game for me (and also appreciation for the horrors Merlin goes through)

Season 1 part 1 || Season 1 part 2

Season 2 part 1 || Season 2 part 2

Season 3 part 1 || Season 3 part 2

Season 4 part 1 ||

[whenyouhearthedoorcreak]

aoliversval;enChapters: 1/3 Fandom: Merlin (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Merthur, Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen/Lancelot (Merlin), Knights of the Round Table & Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin) Characters: Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin (Merlin), Gwen (Merlin), Gwaine (Merlin), Elyan (Merlin) Additional Tags: Pining Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Friends to Lovers, situationship? maybe? kinda?, Best Friends, lancelot and gwen are actualy so important to me, elyan is my favourite, and so therefore him and gwaine are besties, First Kiss, slowburn, Get Together, Touch-Starved Arthur Pendragon (Merlin) Summary:

I've been thinking about Merlin and Arthur and the royal crown again, and touch-starved Arthur Pendragon.

merlin and Arthur have always been close, years of being together every day have grown their fondness for each other.

Merlin takes great pride in Arthur's achievements as king, but a year into his rule Merlin is troubled by the weight it has cast on the man's shoulders, alongside his growing affection he struggles to balance his love for Arthur with his desire to support Arthur as the friend he has always been. Arthur worries about stepping too far and scaring Merlin away, but with the strain of the crown weighing heavily on him he finds himself drifting into daydreams of him and Merlin ruling side by side, or better yet leaving all the troubles behind them.

thanks to everyone who encouraged me and helped make this fic a reality! 

@regulusrules  

@valentinerose529

@olivers-pocket-reality

@amariram

@an-entity-i-think

@helloimawitchwannaseemycauldron

@linotheghost

@slmkaider

@cleversky48

@marcskywalker

[merlinssaggyyfronts]

i just think theres so much more to that time merlin was freeze-dying (get it? like freeze drying? im funny i swear) from the dorocha attack. like what if after those events, hes become extra sensitive to the cold??

like that man absolutely cannot STAND the cold, it not only brings back bad memories (and, unfortunately, reminds him of lancelot) but his body as an in general is weaker to it. so hes always looking for warmth- im talking sitting practically inches away from the fire, stealing blankets, jackets (particularly arthur-), cloaks (particularly arthurs)- you get the gist

and the others catch on, obviously- though they dont realise the severity of it til merlin nearly lights his arm on fire on a particularly chilly night on a hunt (“MERLIN what on EARTH DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!” “im cold” “you’re ON FIRE” “im cold :(” “?!?!”)

after that arthur, the knights and gwen start gifting him little things- an old cloak arthur insists is too damaged and fugly to wear (its in nearly perfect condition), one of elyan’s old jackets he’d long since outgrown from gwen

and the knights, well their gift to merlin is their physical body heat (gwaine in particularly enjoys holding onto merlin like a koala with the excuse of keeping him warm. the only reason arthur doesnt kill him for it is cause of merlins content smile at being warm)

[kissme-withyour-cherrylipstick]

You guys. It's the penultimate chapter 😭 Except not really, because I added an epilogue, so there will now be two more instead of one more :D

[kashilascorner]

New entry for @queer-ragnelle May Day Parade!

Prompt: May 10-16 Month of May {Free Space/Flower Festival}

Behold --my attept at a comedy! You can read it here if you prefer. This is probably the last short story I write for this challenge. Enjoy ^^

He was meant to be someone's uncle, maybe. Definitely not someone's father at any rate. As the hot midday sun shone above his head, Sir Bors wondered what it was about him that he had ended up surrounded by kids. No, not kids. Kids were cute, with their chubby cheeks and their untamed opinions. What he had attracted was far worse: teenagers.

It was a beautiful day in mid-May. Flowers were blooming, birds were singing, horses were happy, and he was not being paid enough for this job. Actually, he was not being paid at all! In fact, by not being in his lands, he was losing money by the minute –but alas, he was not good at accounting anyways, that was work for his brother and his sister-in-law. It's not that Bors didn't like the lads, but he was beginning to understand Sir Kay's irritation towards the world at large given how much he dealt with youngsters all day, every day.

Galahad was a quiet boy. He thought of him as good nephew although he was a second cousin. That was good, with that he could deal. Perceval, on the other hand talked too much. He talked all the time. But there was someone who talked even more: his sister Dindrane. Good lord how much she spoke! Why was she even there in the first place? he wondered. And then there was the elephant inside the room. An enormous elephant all the way from India that definitely had no business in Britain’s forests: Elyan. His son. His actual, real, blood-of-his-blood son. Bors had never had much of an idea of how he should speak to him, so at some point he had decided to talk to him as a fellow comrade. It was his brother's advice: become friends with the lad, he said, get him to trust you, he said, all will be fine and follow the natural course, he said. Well, probably not the best idea to take advice from a man who had not yet been a father and had lost his own at a tender age. But alas, he didn't have much better opinions to go by. Who else was he going to ask for fatherly advice? Arthur? Lancelot? So Bors took the advice at face value. If Elyan had been a child maybe he could have worked out something, but no, of course none of the Lord's designs could ever be that easy. He was (almost) fully grown by the time they met. He even had a shadow of a shadow of something that kind of resembled a beard.

Elyan seemed content enough by the treatment, Bors thought with some relief. A good lad he was. His mother had made a good job, Bors nodded to himself, she should be proud. But Galahad visibly cringed every time they interacted. This angered Bors. Was he doing it so wrong? He felt very judged, negatively, by Galahad's gaze. And who was Galahad, of all people, to judge? And why did Bors even care about his opinion? Bors thought of himself as a competent enough father, even if not a good one. Sure, he had not provided for his son, but only because he didn't know he existed at all! Come think of it, maybe only God was a good enough Father, and still his main fathering method was throwing His children into the world without warning and with only thin skin as their protection. Not even scales or a thick poisonous tooth or two to defend themselves. Bors did better than that: he’d given his lad an armor, and a seat in the most prestigious knight order of the age. So, actually, he had done fairly well by comparison, had he not? Even if the reasoning was a bit sacrilegious in nature.

“Say, Uncle,” spoke Dindrane. Bors, at the head of the party, had to fight his innermost demons not to roll his eyes and let out a long, long sigh. Her excessive familiarity annoyed him. Lads he could deal with, but how in Heaven was one even supposed to deal with a fifteen-year-old girl? “Who would win a fist fight, Sir Gawain or Sir Lancelot?”

“Obviously Gawain!” retorted young Melehan, with a tone that informed Bors the kids had been, no doubt, arguing about this one thing all morning. Obviously Melehan was going to defend his uncle. Bors had not intended to travel with a band of teenagers, but least of all had he planned to borrow Sir Mordred's eldest son, a boy of twelve, as a squire while they went to meet with the rest of the knights. How much he missed his loyal Achilles! Should have never knighted him, honestly, but it was too late to regret it now. Bors had never realized how hard it was to get a good squire until he lost a great one –which Melehan, certainly, was not.

“They would never fist fight in the first place.” Bors said, trying to sound very grave. “And knights don't fist fight.”

“But if they did,” insisted Dindrane, Elyan and Perceval in unison.

“He's going to say Lancelot, he's not impartial.”" complained Melehan, very softly for them to pay attention.

“Obviously Lancelot would win if he ever happened to lower himself to such standards,” commented Galahad, who, even by his standards had been astonishingly quiet.

“Are we talking midday or night fight?” Asked Perceval all of a sudden, like he had just realized it was an absolutely crucial difference.

“Gawain at midday, definitely,” said Elyan, trying to sound very serious (or had his voice really become this deep?) “But at night...”

“Still Gawain!” insisted Melehan.

“No way, not at night.” Galahad scoffed.

“Oh, so you admit he would lose in the morning?” Melehan smiled. Bors turned slightly to look at the little blond boy. Damn, did the boy look like his father.

“Knights don't fist fight.” Insisted Bors.

“I know you have fist flighted,”" said Perceval, cryptically, disconcerting Bors and forcing him to turn his body on his horse to look at him, like an owl turning its head.

“When?”

“You have a brother, sir Bors,” said Perceval, “and brothers fist fight all the time.” he added, in unison with Dindrane, like it was an obvious fact everyone knew. What kind of relationships did the offspring of Pellinore have? Bors thought with horror for a moment, what horrors went behind those walls--then he thought of how Lamorak had turned out. Ah, it made sense.

“We could say that sometimes it can happen, yes,” he conceded. "But I never in my life fist fought Lionel." He had, indeed, fist fought Lionel and broken his lip in the process multiple times, but no reason for the youngsters to know that. It seems like they had enough examples about it not to need any more.

“My cousins and I once had a very big fight, I don't see how it would not be the same between brothers.” Melehan commented.

“And who won?”

“Florence.”

“Ah.” Bors nodded. The boy was a marvel. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree –especially if the tree is Gawain. Right before breaking a smile, he remembered he was trying to give a good example. “Well, you should try to avoid those things. One day you will be knighted, so you keep your hands to yourself and use your sword and your lance honorably, as it is meant to be.”

“Ha! Tell that to the boys, I will throw punches my whole life.” Dindrane laughed, tilting her chin up petulantly. Galahad all of a sudden seemed very uncomfortable. He had grown in a monastery, had he not? He probably never saw a woman talk so shamelessly. Had he ever even seen a girl his own age at all? Probably not. Women could be terrifying, Bors had to give him that. And Dindrane, it seemed, was at least half savage. Melehan had made the horse trot a little faster so now he was on Bors' left side, blushing, instead of nearer Dindrane where he had been riding all morning. He blushed a lot when it came to Dindrane, Bors realized. Maybe he didn't like her? Only the Lord could tell, these youngsters were a mystery.

Bors stole a glance from Elyan, on his right side. Come think of it, perhaps they shouldn't be knighting boys this young. Then he thought of how Perceval was a good two years older than his Elyan and still had much less common sense, so maybe it didn't have anything to do with age after all. Bors smiled at his son, and got his horse a little closer to his. Elyan smiled back, shyly, but pulled out his chest in a show of being a great horseman.

“Who do you think won when they fought, my Lord the King or the Seneschal?” asked Perceval, breaking the silence.

“The King,” said Dindrane and Elyan.

“The Seneschal,” replied Melehan, Galahad and Bors. The lads stared at Bors, and Dindrane smirked maliciously. They had trapped him.

“So who would win, Uncle, Sir Lancelot or Sir Gawain?”

“Who would, who would?” all of them asked.

There was no escape. Bors took a deep breath.

At least this would only go on for a couple more days, then they would meet with Gawain and Lancelot's parties, switch members and begin the quest proper.

But as things were going, he wondered: was the Grail and its promise of divine redemption even worth this much effort? Maybe he should turn back to tournaments and rescuing ladies. It was certainly a more reasonable line of work.

[someguyinc]

also just bc i realized there are 6 of them and i've had my little pony brainrot since i could see shapes and colors i'm assigning the elements of harmony to the bbc kotrt

arthur: magic/friendship

lancelot: loyalty

gwaine: laughter

percival: generosity

elyan: kindness

leon: honesty

[ashesforart]

I'M SORRY WHAT THE FUCK IS THE END OF 04x10 OF MERLIN WHY AM I CRYING MY MF EYES OUT

[estrel]

hey um. i forgot my letterboxd url..... so sorry to do this but to any of my letterboxd moots (which i THINK include @calamitysong @ispyspookymansion @redleavesinthewind ) tell me what it is so i can log back in lmfao 😭 i need to log american psycho....

[minscofrashemen]

There’s an autism episode that my brother is watching for pbs kids show and he fucking points at me and says, “That sounds like sissy!! Autism,”

[xanfeursel]

the world is harsh and cruel. minsc of rashemen's boobs are warm and soft.

[queerofthedagger]

Microfic: Elyan/Gwaine + Lighthouse

Gwaine has never been a guiding light for anyone, no beacon of hope, no candle in the night. Perhaps it is not in his nature, he thinks as he looks at Elyan, tired eyes and tight jaw, his sister's seat empty to his right. He's tried, gods knows he did, but his hands don't know how to be gentle, and he never seems to find the words, never the right stepping stones to cross the growing chasm between them in the aftermath of Gwen's banishment, of a Druid child's spirit, of Lancelot's sacrifice. Gwaine has never been harbour for anyone—always more lighthouse than shelter, more warning and jagged cliffs than a place to rest. As it turns out, all the love eating him up from the inside does not change this either, no matter how hard he tries and tries and tries.