#Don't let your memes stay dreams

[redrowantree]

This meme came to me in a dream and when I woke up I had to make it a reality

[daenysx]

i got bored so here are some modern!james potter headcanons;

um- sunshine energy at its finest!!

james is one of the prettiest boys you could ever see in your life

his smile lights up every room he walks in

he has to take extra five minutes every morning to fix his hair because he always puts his head wrong on the pillow and messes the shape of his thick, wavy hair

heavy sleeper!! (cutest though, sometimes he sleeps with his mouth open)

he's a morning person but he usually goes to bed early, claiming he has to get 8 hours of sleep

sleeps naked. to your delight.

he likes getting slow back scratches and massages, he is addicted to get kisses on his neck and his cheeks, he LOVES being babied

always runs hot even when the room is cold. he's generous too, he holds your cold body in his arms until you get warmer

i once wrote that he makes the best iced lattes in the morning, i still stand by it

he'd practice to be perfect at making your favorite drink (mine is iced latte so i had to say it-)

breakfast fan!!

he never leaves the apartment with an empty stomach, the worst he can do is take some snacks or fruits with him if he runs late

loves morning runs, morning walks, morning work outs, morning stretches. anything to wake his body up

and we probably all know this but james potter is the type of man who knows his body well

he looks good and he knows it

he also knows what he should do to take care of himself and his health

i mean he likes waking up early and starting his day, but he'll stay in bed with you if it means he'll get cuddles (especially when it's cold)

he tries to wake you up by bribing you with promises of a shower together and breakfast prepared by him

speaking of showers-

um- if you don't mind me being a little smutty here,

james potter loves eating you out

and he loves it more when he gets to wake you up to his mouth

and he does it again when he convinces you into shower

he does it for his own pleasure really

because it feels so good to keep his mouth on you and rubbing himself to soft blankets at the same time

this man is never- and i mean never ashamed of coming into his pants

like seriously, just think about it

he adores that feeling of falling apart for you, he doesn't even need to be touched

needy. and that's hot.

he makes noises in bed. never stays silent. always tells you how you make him feel.

he likes being called 'my love'

king of getting you flowers because 'they made him think of you'

he makes fun of his blurry sight every time he loses his glasses

he can't read for long (sleepy boy alert) but he likes it when you read a book out loud for him

tries to compete with remus on how many movies he can watch in a row without falling asleep

he loses of course

he complains about sirius' smoking (stop acting like a saint prongs) but he takes a few drags when he's too stressed

now that's the thing- james potter doesn't like to burden others with his stress

he keeps things to himself when he's not joking

his glossy eyes give him away though

precious boy

he blinks a few quick tears on your neck when it gets too much

let's keep going with happy james because i can't handle the thought of him being sad

the best hugger ever!!!

strong arms, broad chest, smells perfect, knows how to squeeze your body with the best amount of pressure

you forget everything when he holds you

he never pulls away from a hug first

just my dream guy

another thing- he is so proud of himself when you laugh at his jokes

has a group chat with remus and sirius

never stops sending memes, sometimes drives remus insane

his spotify playlists are so complicated because his music taste changes with every song

he wants you to choose the music every time you're in his car

guys- james potter brainrot is something else, i swear i love him so much

that's all for now, let me know if you'd like a part 2

[mcflymemes]

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT - THE ANTHOLOGY BY TAYLOR SWIFT PROMPT LIST *  assorted lyrics from the album, some lines slightly adapted for meme purposes but feel free to adjust as necessary

even if it's handcuffed, i'm leaving here with you.

trust me. i can handle a dangerous man.

i love you. it's ruining my life.

does it feel all right to not know me?

i am who i am 'cause you trained me.

quick. tell me something awful.

i loved you the way that you were.

we were just kids, babe.

i can fix him.

you and i go from one kiss to getting married.

you said i'm the love of your life.

way up there, i actually love it.

i just don't understand how you don't miss me.

do you hate me?

did you think i had it in me?

what if i told you i'm back?

i still miss the smoke.

i'm not trying to exaggerate, but i think i might die if it happened.

you look like stevie nicks.

it's hell on earth to be heavenly.

i still can't believe it.

this happens once every few lifetimes.

didn't you hear? they called it all off.

it's happening again.

my friends say it isn't right to be scared.

i might just die.

fuck you if i can't have us.

tell me about the first time you saw me.

are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?

no one's ever had me... not like you.

stay away from her.

there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you.

i don't think you've changed much.

that's where i was when i lost it all.

life was always easier on you than it was on me.

i hoped you'd return.

do you believe me now?

what if your eyes looked up and met mine one more time?

what are the chances you'd be downtown?

is it something i did?

oh, we must stop meeting like this.

they say what doesn't kill you makes you aware.

i'm not a donor, but i'd give you my heart if you needed it.

looking backwards might be the only way to move forwards.

the story isn't mine anymore.

what a charming saturday!

none of it is changing.

wild winds are death to the candle.

one bad seed kills the garden.

i'm bitter, but i swear i'm fine.

this place made me feel worthless.

i didn't want to come down.

everything had been above board.

blood's thick, but nothing like a payroll.

you can mark my words that i said it first.

the professor said to write what you know.

all of this to say, i hope you're okay.

your words are still just ringing in my head.

i built a legacy which you can't undo.

who do i have to speak to to change the prophecy?

the effects were temporary.

no, i'm not coming to my senses.

babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it.

you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart.

i guess a lesser woman would've lost hope.

thought of calling you, but you won't pick up.

you're a professional.

long may you reign.

you're an animal. you are bloodthirsty.

now i seem to be scared to go outside.

i don't believe in good luck.

i hate it here.

if i'd been there, i'd hate it.

only the gentle survived.

i'm lonely, but i'm good.

you have no room in your dreams for regrets.

i thought it was just goodbye for now.

are you still a mind reader?

let it once be me.

i haven't decided yet.

i still dream of him.

i'm so afraid i sealed my fate.

it was always the same searing pain.

i can't forgive the way you made me feel.

it wasn't a fair fight or a clean kill.

she used to say she wished that you were dead.

tell me all your secrets.

they tried to warn you about me.

you're in terrible danger.

i'm the life you chose.

yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine.

no one asks any questions here.

tell me i'm despicable. say it's unforgivable.

i'm running back home to you.

you should see your faces.

you knew the price going in.

was any of it true?

who the fuck was that guy?

i don't ever want you back.

did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?

you don't get to tell me you feel bad.

you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me.

am i allowed to cry?

there's no such thing as bad thoughts. only your actions talk.

they're going to crucify me anyway.

i know i'm just repeating myself.

that's the closest i've come to my heart exploding.

[woso-dreamzzz]

Kid

Arsenal Women x Teen!Reader

Summary: You join Arsenal Women at age sixteen

Moving to England hadn't exactly been your plan when you started to play football.

To be honest, there hadn't been a plan at all, seeing as you were four when your parents first signed you up for your local academy in Sweden. It was just an excuse to keep you out of the house, so your parents didn't have to take time off work to look after you when school finished.

It helped that your school was partnered with the academy so a representative would come and walk all the academy students there and back.

Football may have been a convenience but it was clear to everyone that you were somewhat of a prodigy. Linköping Fc signed you as soon as they could, forcing you to make the move from your tiny town to the city.

Your parents were more than happy to finance the move - the kind of parents that happily parent from a distance but brag to all of their friends about how smart, how talented their daughter was.

You were happy to be rid of them.

You were even happier to get the callup for the National Team for the World Cup.

Your chest thudded in your throat when you received the call. You hadn't thought you would get the call-up, not when you were so young, so you had been at a café with some of your school friends when your phone rang.

You had picked it up absentmindedly and almost passed out from shock when Peter revealed he wanted you on the team.

The World Cup came and went and the bronze medal you won stayed with you. You had flat-out refused to give it over to your parents, who wanted to put it in the trophy cabinet in a house you no longer lived in.

The high of the World Cup bled into the high of getting a call to sign for Arsenal.

You hadn't even really thought about it.

You just accepted.

Which was how you had gotten here, rocking back and forth on the balls of your feet as you waited for Stina to lock her car and walk in with you.

●～●～●～●～

You couldn't help but look at your jersey in awe. Your number combined with your last name on the back of an Arsenal jersey felt like a dream come true.

"There she is," Amanda said when you finally wandered into the meeting room, free from media duty. She pushed out a chair that was clearly meant for you at the table she was sitting at.

You sat in the seat awkwardly, suddenly feeling shy and awkward.

"This is y/n," Amanda said to the others, presenting you to them like you were someone really exciting.

"Hi, y/n. I'm Jen."

You didn't tell her that you already knew who she was, who they all were. You just sat there and let everyone introduce themselves to you because that was the polite thing to do.

"Hi."

"You're young, aren't you?" Asked Kim, even though you knew that she probably already knew that.

You nodded though. "Yeah." Your voice was barely above a whisper. "I'm sixteen."

"But she's a superstar." It was nice of Amanda to butt in. It saved you from having to speak.

"I think we know that," McCabe said with an eye roll," I think we all saw that match-winning goal against Australia."

You winced slightly as you snuck a glance to McCabe's other side where Catley sat, the very defender that you megged before scoring your goal.

Your eyes widened in horror when she made eye contact. "Sorry." You looked down at your lap, hiding your shaking hands under the table.

"Don't sweat it, kid," Catley replied with an easy grin," No hard feelings. It was a good call." She smirked at you. "Though, the deer in headlights look you had after it went in was pretty funny."

Laughter rang out through the group and you relaxed marginally, groaning at the reminder. Everyone you knew had sent that picture to you and you knew for a fact that it was still circulating the internet as a meme.

●～●～●～●～

It was easy to settle into life at Arsenal.

You were still shy and awkward off the pitch but you fit in well with the other girls and Lina, Stina and Amanda were always ready to sweep you away when they noticed you getting too overwhelmed.

Somewhere along the way Catley became Steph and McCabe became Katie.

You weren't really sure when that happened but it was a welcome change from when you first joined.

"Come on, kid. You've been studying too much," Katie said as an arm dragged you away from your laptop to where the others were playing FIFA.

You were dumped between Less and Vic while Lina laughed.

"She's always studying."

You rolled your eyes. "Just because you don't have to go to school anymore, doesn't mean that I don't."

"Online school isn't really school," Cloe said before swearing when Gio scored another goal," It's like...school without the deadlines."

"Except the deadline is before Christmas," You replied with a huff," I have essays to write, Katie! Let me go!"

"Don't let her go, girls," Katie said from where she was curled up with Caitlin.

Alessia mockingly saluted as she bracketed you in her arms while Vic pinned down your legs.

"Less! Vic!" You squawked as you tried to wiggle away from them.

Their holds were unrelenting and made even worse when Kyra popped up out of nowhere, digging her fingers into your side and tickling you like you had personally offended her or something.

"Stop! Stop!" You laughed, tears running down your face as Kyra remained unrelenting. "Cait-Caitlin! Caitlin, help!"

Caitlin looked at you thoughtfully, humming to herself before giving you a faux look of sympathy. "Sorry, y/n, I can't. You see, I'm still holding a grudge against you for grabbing that bronze medal." She winked to let you know she was joking.

"Oh, come on!"

●～●～●～●～

It took you nearly two weeks of being in London to meet the ACL squad and it was only because Kathrine slid in for a tackle at the wrong time and hit your ankle.

You hadn't even been on the ground for that long but it was enough that Jonas sent Gio to take you to the physios to get it taped up with an extremely apologetic Kathrine following after you.

"I'm so sorry," She was saying when Gio shepherded you into the room," I'll make up for it. How does one of those big jelly baby packs sound?"

"I'm not allowed to eat them," You replied," Stina said that they'll rot my teeth."

"Fine, fine, I'll think of something. How about dinner? I'll buy you dinner for your cheat day. Just tell me when."

You rolled your eyes, having no intention of doing so but still nodded.

"What's up with all this commotion?"

You had to admit, seeing Leah Williamson in person made you feel a little starstruck and you immediately retreated into yourself.

Gio jerked her thumb at Kathrine. "Kuhl hurt the kid and seeing as we need the kid, Jonas wants her ankle taped."

"My ankle's fine," You said stubbornly but allowed a physio to usher you onto the bed between Goldie and Wienriother. You gave them both one of your trademark awkward smiles as you let the physio pull off your boot and socks.

You didn't want to look at your ankle, already knowing it was bruised by the way that you saw Goldie wince sympathetically at you while the physio moved away to grab some ice.

"That looks nasty," She said," Does it hurt?"

"Not too bad."

"I'm Teyah, by the way."

"y/n."

"I know." She smiled at you. "It's nice that there's someone younger than me and Naomi now."

You looked down bashfully. "Happy to be of service."

Next to you, Weinriother laughed. "Don't mind Teyah, she's just glad no one will call her kid anymore. I'm Laura, by the way."

"And I'm Beth!" She leaned over Laura to shake your hand before indicating to where her girlfriend was being worked on. "That's Viv, she's a little prickly sometimes but if you ever need some peace and quiet, I'm sure she wouldn't mind you sitting with her."

You nodded, still feeling a little awkward even though the tension had disappeared.

"You're living with Stina, right?" Leah asked," How's that going?"

"Good," You replied, focussed on the way that the physio was moving your ankle," She lets me play music on the speakers while I study."

Leah laughed. "I live right round the corner. If you ever need a break, feel free to pop in. I reckon I'm more fun than Stina anyway."

●～●～●～●～

You hated asking for help.

You hated it even more when you had to ask for help on schoolwork.

You were smart. You knew you were smart. If there were two things that a lack of parents in your life gave you, it was excellent football skills and the ability to solve your own problems.

But this maths section in your textbook was causing you more pain than a Katie tackle in training ever could.

You glanced around the room. The media room was almost always empty at this time of day - the two and a half hour window between morning training and the gym session.

Almost everyone lived close so headed back home to rest before coming back. Stina had asked if you wanted to head back home with her but you decided not to, needing to finish your maths homework.

Lina had asked if you wanted her to drop you off on her way to her own place as well but you didn't relent.

You hunkered down in the media room with your textbook and, after just over an hour, your eyes stung like you hadn't slept in three days.

You glanced around again and finally swallowed your pride.

"Frida?" You asked the least intimidating person in the room," Can you help me?"

She looked up from her phone. "What is it?" She dragged your textbook towards her. "Oh! I can help!"

Despite her optimism, within a few seconds, it became clear that Frida could absolutely not help you. The more she read through your problems, the deeper her frown got until she was holding a pencil between her fingers and mouthing the question to herself as if that would help her understand.

She looked positively ill when she looked up at you before she cleared her throat. "Lia? Do you know how to do fancy algebra?"

Lia, from across the room, sighed as she approached. "I used to be quite good at algebra," She boasted," What's the problem?"

"Algebra," You deadpanned, shoving the textbook and your notepad at her," Help."

To her credit, she got further than Frida did, jotting down her working out before falling at the last hurdle - just like you did. She frowned. "Give me a second."

She rewrote all of her work but still ended up stumped at the same place as before.

"Kim? Jen? How were you at maths in school?"

Kim and Jen tried to help as well but it was like the blind leading the blind. You were going around in circles.

"When are you going to need this in life?" Kim said, drawing a line through her most reason equation and sighing.

"Unless you want to be an engineer, never." Jen sighed and flipped the book shut. "You don't want to be an engineer, do you, kid?"

"I'm happy playing football."

●～●～●～●～

If you weren't doing schoolwork at every spare moment, it was safe to say that you napping.

Back at National Camp, it wasn't uncommon to find you curled up in bed or with your head in Frido's lap while everyone watched a movie.

It seemed that your need to nap every moment you weren't occupied had carried over to England.

It got a little embarrassing the first few times you had been caught napping in the communal space. It was even worse when you woke up to Viv staring down at you with an unreadable look on her face, taking in your form curled up under your travel blanket.

You had smiled nervously as she stood in front of you, unmoving.

When Beth appeared through the door a moment later, Viv shushed her sternly and tucked your blanket up over your shoulders again, taking a seat nearby with a book.

Beth, it seemed, hadn't been able to keep her mouth shut about it so your constant naps had just become an expected thing and, after Leah had accidentally woken you up and gotten yelled at by Viv for it, the team tended to just leave you alone.

You were slightly delirious and warm when you woke up from your nap, eyes fluttering open and then shut again.

The low murmur of chatter let you know that contrary to when you started your nap, you were now no longer alone.

You were still quite confused, brain still thick with sleep, but you could recognise Sabrina's Canadian-accented English so you gathered that the keepers had finished their morning practice and had found you asleep in the media room.

You also recognised that your head was now slightly elevated so one of them must have moved your head into their lap while you slept. That was nice. Sometimes you would wake up with a crook in your neck from sleeping on the beat-up sofa that Leah swore she was one bad back away from replacing herself.

Your eyes fluttered open again, blearily blinking.

Across from you, Naomi laughed. "The kid's awake."

"I'm not a kid," You said stubbornly even though you were," You're not that much older than me."

"Still older," Naomi replied.

Next to her, Sabrina laughed.

That meant that Manu was sitting with you, your head in her lap. She laughed as well, jolting you slightly as you clutched your travel blanket tighter around your body.

You yawned.

"How long until gym?"

"Hour and a bit," Came Manu's answer.

You hummed and yawned a second time.

"Don't tell me you're going back to sleep," Sabrina said.

"Fine. I won't tell you."

●～●～●～●～

You spent the first few matches stuck on the bench.

You were young and not as experienced as your teammates so it made sense that you would be stuck there for the time being. Besides, it made you feel a little bit better that Kyra was stuck on the bench as well so you had someone who acted younger than you to muck around with.

"Chin up," Laia said with a grin, an arm thrown over your shoulder as she walked onto the pitch with you for warmups," You're starting today. Aren't you excited?"

"You look more excited than me," You replied a little sourly," I...I feel a little sick if I'm honest."

"You'll do great."

"So long as you tie your boots correctly and don't trip," Noelle said in way of greeting.

Your cheeks lit up in flames instantly at the reminder of training a few days ago when Beth had snuck up behind you and made a stupid sound in your ear. You had jumped into the air in shock and your laces weren't tied correctly so you tripped over your own feet and went tumbling to the ground in a way that made you look clumsier than Alessia.

"Don't be mean," Lotte chastised as the four of you passed a ball around," y/n knows how to properly tie her laces." She sent you a teasing smile and a shrug. "Besides, I'm sure she'll have some of the older girls lining up to make sure they're done properly."

You huffed as you kicked the ball back to her. You spun on your heel. "You're all mean," You declared," I'm gonna warm up with Vic and Less."

●～●～●～●～

The ninety minutes of your debut match were gruelling.

The ball went back and forth between the teams. Every shot that went in was equalised quickly. Everyone was growing tired, especially when five minutes of extra time was awarded and Katie was one dirty tackle away from earning herself a yellow card.

You took a moment to catch your breath, pulling up your socks before breaking into a sprint.

The opposing team's defence was in shambles and you could see their goalkeeper getting antsy.

A long ball from Katie fell neatly into Alessia's feet and she began her run.

You followed after her quickly as the opposing defence broke their line. It was carnage for a moment as you both approached the box.

The goalkeeper came off her line ever so slightly as the defence mobbed Alessia, who passed quickly to you.

Your foot moved automatically as you chipped the ball over the goalkeeper's head and into the back of the net.

Your instincts got you the goal so when your brain finally caught up, you were sporting the same look on your face as the one you had when you won against Australia.

The final whistle rang out as you stood there in shock.

Half a moment later, the team crashed into you.

Less made it to you first, pulling you in for a tight hug before everyone else converged on you.

You felt a bit like a dog, with the amount of head pats you were receiving but the blinding smile on your face more than made up for it - especially when Viv meandered over and gave you a hug and congratulations.

"Come on, l/n!" Katie cheered as she dragged you through the victory lap. "Party tonight! I'll pay for the drinks!"

"She's sixteen," Lina reminded her.

"I didn't say we had to go out to a pub! It's legal for sixteen-year-olds to drink at home! What do you say, kid?"

You laughed. "Good luck getting Stina to agree."

[emo-gremlin]

SFW Mr. Puzzles x Reader!

PDA IS A MUST. He's always holding your hand, hugging you, tapping his screen against your forehead, arm around your waist (only after you've made it clear that he can do so)

Was never in a real relationship (platonic or romantic) until you. He definitely pulls stuff he saw in romcoms when you first got together. You admired his gestures, but you did eventually sit him down and explain not every romantic relationship is like the stuff on TV.

After you guys have that conversation, he tones it down a little, but he's still quoting the cheesiest lines and he will not be stopped

Tries to spend as much time with you as he can.

Have a dream of stardom? He's doing everything he can to help you get there. Prefer to stay in the shadows? He's fine with that too.

An absolute doting sweetheart.

Very nervous about touching you at the start, he knew enough from TV that consent is key in a relationship, and didn't want you uncomfortable. So once you clarified PDA to him, he never breaches those boundaries unless you say it's OK.

He still has his temper, but has not, and WILL NOT use his power OR raise a hand against you. He told you at the beginning if he ever does that to kill him, he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he did that. He usually holds himself up in his office. You can tell he's upset if his voice glitches and he reeks of cigarette smoke.

It takes a while before he opens up to you about his childhood, and what drove him to the 'Transformation' as he calls it. It's an extreme sign of trust that he tells you about it. He tries to remain a puzzle to his audience, you are the first to get the tools to solve it.

Watching anything with him has stages.

1st time watching something: Remains quiet unless you don't understand a plot point, or need help identifying an actor.

2nd time: Fun facts about production, the tricks they used to get certain shots, gets more in depth with the Lore and explains symbols if there is any.

3rd time: Starts pointing out errors, plot holes, starts talking about how HE would have done it if he had been on the crew.

He usually stays in these guidelines unless the movie is GODAWFUL or is TRYING to be so bad it's good.

Loves having your input on his scripts, costumes (you may end up being a living mannequin for him at times if he's having trouble), set design, etc.

Will list you in the credits, but if you prefer a nickname to be used, he will use that instead.

CUDDLEBUG. My boy didn't get much physical affection as a child, and it shows. He's also a big spoon.

Absolutely adores everything about you, and it shows when he talks about you. Smiling wide, very energetic, so in love with you that you wouldn't be able to keep it a secret.

Loves being able to just slow down and enjoy being with you. Even if he's working on a script at his desk, he loves hearing a soft giggle while you look at memes on your phone on the couch.

Wanna watch something but afraid that there's content in it that might trigger something? No problem! He has no issue listing off what it includes for you. (If you still have interest in the plot, but wouldn't be able to see the media, he'll spoil the plot so it saves you the trouble.)

Always up before you, and definitely a malewife when he isn't working. He tries his best to be there when you wake up before he goes to work. If he can't, he leaves a note and fresh made coffee/tea in the pot.

You have to pull him away from watching the negative reviews, otherwise he WILL obsess over them and work himself to death trying to make them happy.

He's ready to commit various warcrimes if anyone so much as looks at you funny if you asked him to. You're the first person to actually stand by him and he's not letting anyone hurt you.

Definitely will set up private dates on his more romantic sets for the two of you. He turns all the cameras away from the set, as a way to show that this is all for you and you alone.

Will bring you with him if he's filming something in an exotic place. He makes sure you two get enough time together to see the sights.

Has invited at least one of your favorite actors/directors/writers to a birthday party. If you ask him not to, he will be a little disappointed, but respects it. (As long as he can AT LEAST get you their autograph)

Gets invited to an award show? You are going with him, but will try to convince the cameras not to point in your direction if you feel uncomfortable. He wants to share his success with you.

While he can't get props from your favorite movies, if you show interest in a particular prop from his sets, the second filming is done, it's yours. Same with costumes.

I love him your honor

[rainystarters]

💫 love is cosmic ! a collection of dialogue + action prompts inspired by red velvet's album cosmic. some prompts usfw. add +reversed for the muse receiving the meme to perform the action instead. adjust as necessary.

dialogue :

meeting you as the stars would have it.

i can't get you off my mind.

what did you do to my mind?

i want to know you.

how about you stay a little longer?

perhaps we're travelers searching for orphaned dreams.

come with me.

discover things no human eyes have seen.

i just can't say goodnight.

your love is cosmic.

you got me hypnotized.

i saw you hiding.

what are you? my god.

honey, i give you my all.

i'll find you in my dreams.

summer, autumn, winter, spring: the whole world is you.

my memories are floating away.

the beautiful times are leaving me, stealing you away.

this isn't the end ...remember.

i will gladly stay by your side.

it's you who kept me through the long nights.

no one knows where a fading star goes.

and i'll fly light-years to find you.

to you, my universe, the only reason i exist.

i'll always be here for you.

is it love?

i remember the first moment i saw you.

you feel the same way, right?

we can't play no game the right way.

it doesn't matter 'cause you're my prize.

i saw the same moon.

i want to dream every day.

i want to whisper in your ears the things i couldn't say.

we're not that young anymore.

i still remember the summer days when i first saw you.

believe in us more than anything.

i don't mind staying up all night, my love.

let's talk like we did when we were young.

i'm your friend. i'll be there.

take my hand and run.

sweet dreams, my love.

our story continues even in dreams.

when the moon shines bright, i'll tell you my story.

close your eyes and lean on me, my love.

oh, you've grown so quickly, kid.

we were always young and fearless.

we're together and we have the same dream.

actions :

crash-landing. sender chases a falling star but finds receiver where it fell.

stargaze. sender lies down next to receiver to stargaze.

daisy chain. sender weaves flowers into receiver's hair.

hypnotize. sender falls under receiver's spell, hypnotized.

zodiac. sender asks for receiver's sign.

bubble. sender blows/magically creates bubbles that surround receiver.

string. sender sees an invisible string of fate tying them to receiver.

chase. sender chases receiver through the woods.

arcade. sender loses a game to receiver while at a neon-illuminated arcade.

last drop. sender pours a drink into receiver's mouth.

hallucinate. sender finds receiver hallucinating and talking to inanimate objects.

memory. sender steps into one of receiver's memories.

sunburn. sender kisses receiver's skin and leaves behind a burn mark.

far-flung. sender wakes in another world to receiver staring down at them.

funny story. sender watches receiver trespass on a fairy ring and join the dance.

sunset. sender kisses receiver against the setting sun.

peek. sender doesn't notice receiver watching them dress through a hole.

honey. sender sends a bee to sting receiver.

stars align. sender fails to stop receiver from completing a ritual.

cosmos. sender and receiver feel each other's heart beat despite being apart.

night drive. sender and receiver drive through the night in a convertible.

butterfly. sender catches receiver transforming into [magical girl/werewolf/etc].

long-lost. sender reunites with receiver who has no memory of them.

sunflower. sender tucks a flower into receiver's lunch/purse/etc. to find later.

tarot. sender draws a card and waits for receiver to reveal its face.

flight. sender bridal carries receiver as they fly.

sweet dream. sender and receiver snuggle in bed below glow-in-the-dark stars.

may queen. sender crowns receiver queen of the spring festival.

turbulence. sender trips receiver, sending them falling.

carousel. sender grabs receiver's hand as they ride on a carousel.

moonlight. sender and receiver bathe naked in the moonlight.

astral. sender astral projects to receiver's location far away.

cat's cradle. sender performs a spell with receiver using cat's cradle.

night. sender and receiver walk through an illuminated night festival/market.

ride. sender sits on receiver's lap, straddling them.

see you. sender kisses receiver before they part forever/for a long time.

electric. sender teases receiver, brushing their lips across intimate skin.

cosmic love. sender and receiver break the bed during sex.

[billythesimp]

Yo! Your work has interested me very much. I'm also glad that the rules are detailed, it makes it easier to make a request.

Can I request Wise and Belle (separately) with reader who likes to cuddle? The reader literally becomes a koala ; on a walk he loves to hold hands or just be close. It is true happiness to be in the arms of a loved one~If you don't like the request, then feel free to skip it !

[Stares lovingly at a photo card]

Oh to cuddle the babies. But it is just a dream~

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎…

I always like to do the little domestic pieces with characters, you can really explore how they would act. Also love giving Wise and Belle some attention!

Wise /Belle x gn!reader

𝑃𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡…⋙

tw: none

✦ Wise is the perfect height to be clinged on. I don’t think he’ll mind being pressed up against, if anything he’d pull you closer if in public. His excuse is so you don’t get lost or that other pedestrians can walk by without running into you both. But you don’t mind, in fact you’ll play with his fingers when he does this, clutching his sleeve or swinging his arm beside each other. The physical contact makes him happy, tightening his hold on you,afraid you’d grow cold if he lets you go.

✦ When cuddling, I find that Wise’s room is very relaxing and would probably have speakers around so while you both are laying together on his large bedding, you could play some relaxing ambience noise that help you both fall asleep. That or he plays his documentary on his Tv, allowing you to crawl up on his chest and wrap around his waist to stay close by.

✦ His slim fingers run through your hair, scratching at your scalp in a soothing rhythm before traveling down to your neck and back. Rubbing circles over your shirts before pressing kisses on your forehead and temples. You can’t see it but he’s just staring fondly at how peaceful you are, should you snore he chuckles to himself and wipes away any drool you might have. 

✦ When he’s the cuddler, he’s a grumpy riser so his defense is to groan in your ear and curl up around you so don’t have a chance to leave. He could pin you to his chest, your back to him so he can tickle your sides and wrap around your stomach, his hands warm on your exposed skin. Taking in your scent as he nuzzles into your neck, complaining about how it’s too early to get up and that he wants to stay like this a little longer.

✦ Sweet girl, she’s hold your hand as she drags you around to her favorite shops. Fingers intertwined before occasionally leaving kisses on your knuckles, a joyful smile on her face as you laugh at her mannerisms. Skipping side by side, whenever you want to go somewhere you’ll wrap an arm around her shoulder and gently lead her away, seeing how she’s shorter than you so she willingly follows your lead.

✦ Personally, I love Belle’s room as it’s a fun vibe all around. Though messy, with the two of you guys cuddling on the bed, she can’t help but think she’s constantly showing you memes on her phone or any news update on inter-knot. You both are wired in together, sometimes Eous joining the both of you on the bed for a mild recharge, Belle teasing his ears while you squish his little arms. 

✦Belle is a deep sleeper, so should she fall asleep on the couch while you both are watching a movie, you can carry her back to her bed. Though in her sleep, she’ll pull you in and have you sleep in with her, forcing herself into your chest as she feels secure in your arms and yawning loudly with a smile on her face. Sweet dreams for her, surrounded by your embrace and smell.

✦ Between the two of you, your both kinda starfish sleepers. The difference being that Belle will lay on top of you, your arms holding her like a plushie that breathes and is warm. She’s always the little spoon, trapped in your arms that you both always decide that you aren't getting up today. But she’ll never miss the opportunity to wake up beside you, lovingly starting as she tucks your hair back from your face.

[sucrows]

Can I have D, M and V for Shu, Jun and Niki nsfw alphabet please 🙏

Requests are closed actually you know what fuck it we ball. why not. im in the mood for an alphabet ask. nobody request anything else this guy right here will be the only exception

(NSFW UNDER CUT)

[D] DIRTY SECRET

Morning wood. All the time. He hates it so much like you wouldn’t believe. It’s not actually that big of a deal but for some reason he’ll get hard no matter what he was dreaming of. Dream of his art winning an award and getting displayed in a gallery? Bricked up. Dream of going to a shrimp themed amusement park with the other eccentrics but it turns into a shopping mall where he gets lost in the bathroom? Hard as a rock. The worst thing to consistently happen to him. 

[M] MOTIVATION

Trying to get Shu riled up for sex is like playing a game of operation. It’s very easy to mess up and make him clam up and dismiss you. There is no surefire way to get Shu in the mood, but one thing he cannot resist is being worshiped by his partner. Praise by anyone else? Who cares. Getting treated tenderly and receiving loving encouragement from someone he cares about? Well... He is just a man after all. 

[V] VOLUME

He tries to stay quiet, but he always ends up making some noise. He’s generally speaking a panter and a grunter over a moaner. Just like everything regarding sex, he can be quite shy and quite particular about his performance, he struggles a lot in regards to feeling shame over making any sound during sex so be sure to give him plenty of reassurance (but not too much lest he feel coddled)! 

[D] DIRTY SECRET 

Wants and I mean WANTS to smell your underwear soooooo bad. It’s crazy how badly he wants to do it. He has too much respect and self-discipline to give in and do it but if you were to even so much as hint to being okay with it... well, he might just offer to do your laundry from then on.... totally not to hide the evidence of what he’d get on the fabric. 

[M] MOTIVATION

His own hormones and any piece of visible skin. All he has to do is look at someone he’s into for long enough and he can get turned on. If he already has a sexual relationship with someone then oh boy is he even worse. Cleavage, thighs, hands, necks, anything can catch his eye and get him going if it’s exposed. 

[V] VOLUME

Naturally on the quieter side of things. He tends to grunt a lot and is a fan of dirty talk sometimes, but he’s also more than content to just silently make you feel good without feeling the need to vocalize. He doesn’t have much shame about making noise or not making it at all, truly an unbothered king. 

[i don't have access to my main pc rn forgive me for not using niki's banner i only have so many of them]

NIKI SHIINA

[D] DIRTY SECRET

You know those “hey babe I passed out 7 times but your cinnamon rolls are ready” memes? He wants to actually give it a shot. Either on the giving or receiving end, he’s down. He recognizes it’d probably suck but will that stop him? No. Would totally try cooking something with his/your cum if you’d like. 

[M] MOTIVATION

Knowing someone else wants him is usually what gets him going. As long as he has the free time, Niki is usually down for a quick fuck but knowing someone else's eyes are on him makes him all the more excited. Sometimes hunger also gets him to feel in the mood. There’s a fine line though, if he gets too hungry, he’ll need a break to go eat or he might pass out lol. 

[V] VOLUME

He’s generally noisy. He doesn’t really try to hold himself back unless he’s worried about disturbing his neighbors. Sometimes he can even get chatty during sex. He’s a bit prone to getting distracted and letting his mind wander so sometimes, when you check in on him, he’ll start saying something completely unrelated like “We need to buy more eggs” while you’re having sex. 

[c0smoshit]

hi hi i just wanted to say that i ADORE your fanfics omg… if you don’t mind / if it’s not too much of a bother, i’d be curious to know how the metal gear men would take care of their s/o during her period? mainly solid snake, big boss, and venom snake but feel free to include more if you’d like! really going through it with that rn lmao but i hope you’ve been well! stay hydrated and take care of yourself! <3

Thanks for the compliments dear!!

And ofc your wish is my command ;))

Damn Periods

⋆ ࣪. ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤 ≫ Solid Snake, Big Boss, Venom Snake and Raiden

⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ≫ none, pure fluff!

⋆ ࣪. 𝔸/ℕ ≫ thank you guys for these requests, they are so cute😭

Solid Snake (David)

★ At first he wouldn't mind your periods that much since he really didn't know how they worked

★ But if he sees you in any kind of pain be sure that this man is 24/7 on you

★ Want to be alone? That's alright with him. Want to cuddle all day long? Perfect. Want to go out? Let's go. Want to stay inside? He's already bringing the covers

★ He'll adapt, so don't stress too much about it

Now that you were here in Alaska, back with him again, the cold wasn't really a burden with such good company.

Waiting for him under your two heavy blankets that couldn't compare to the heat of his own skin, you craddled your arms closer to you, lower stomach cramping.

"Where were you? Off to Shadow Moses again?"

You whined as you saw him bringing a steamy cup with him, which you knew you had to share with him. He smiled as he pried the two blankets from your surprisingly still cool body, seeing you curled up.

"Wouldn't even dream about it darling"

You planted your feet against his bicep, chuckling as he hissed, goosebumps forming on his skin almost immediately.

"How are you still that cold?"

You smiled as you giggled at his stunned expression, grabbing the cup that was being handed to you, sighing at the feeling of his arms wrapping around your middle.

"This morning wasn't enough for you? Greedy girl"

He pinched your cheek as he smiled and you recalled the moment he was talking about; you wrapped on one of his fluffiest sweaters, forcing him to cuddle you in bed before he had to head off to take care of his dogs.

You pressed your back further into his chest, lolling your head to the side and resting it on his shoulder bone. Only your heads were visible as the dawn cascaded through the creaky wood.

"Still hurting?"

"Yeah"

You muttered out as you went to grasp your belly, feeling a pair of bigger hands already soothing the skin there, kneading softly and rumaging through the expanse of your skin.

You sipped your favourite warm drink he knew you loved, almost melting at the way he choose the perfect options for your taste buds.

"You're the best, really"

You nuzzled your cheek into his jaw, smelling his aftershave, the one you had bought him not long ago. Lifting your shirt, he finally felt the softness of your skin, massaging now your lower belly as he felt you melt under his touch.

"Better?"

You nodded, already feeling yourself close your weary eyes, nape resting on the expanse of his shoulder, legs resting between his own.

Big Boss "Naked Snake" (John)

★ I see him definitely being the meme of "What size pussy do you wear, woman?" When buying you pads

★ But jokes aside, he would be such a sweetheart with you

★ Will buy you any sweets too whenever he had to buy tampons or pads

★ Belly rubs are a MUST

Curled up on the bathroom floor as your cramps had gotten even worse when you had left the bed to change, stained cheeks that you tried to rub off and finally get up.

"Lets go back to sleep sweetheart"

You had already started to avoid questions like how the fuck was he able to sneak on you like that when the answer was pretty obvious.

He was indeed big boss

Hooking an arm under your knees and the other by your back he lifted you up easily, cringing at the way fat tears still rolled down your cheeks. He hated seeing you in pain, he hated your damn cramps even more than you did.

"It's okay"

He wiped your cheeks with his thumb as he laid back down on the bed with you, not even letting go of the princess carrying as he laid back down on your many pillows.

"Cmon sweetie, you're with me now"

You pressed your face on his chest, trying to surpress your incessant cries you didn't even know where they were coming from. He melted as you muffled your words into his naked chest.

"Didn't want to- wake you up"

Interrumpted by a hiccup you felt even more tears falling down your cheeks, making you separate your wet and hot face from his chest, rubbing your eyes.

"Don't waste such a pretty voice in such fool words"

He whispered out, grasping your hair and pressing your face into his neck. Your hands now hugged his neck as he laid down a bit, finding a comfortable position and pecking your head on the process, rubbing soothing circles with his thumb on your knee.

You both fell into a comfortable silence and when he looked down he saw his wet chest and your beautiful pout as your lips were pressed tightly into his pectoral.

"Sweet dreams"

Venom Snake "Big Boss"

★ His overprotectiveness definitely goes up to a 100%

★ He doesn't want to see you moving a muscle, and less if your periods are painful

★ Cuddles, baths, belly rubs, pills, pads, whatever you ask for, he is giving

★ Will stay in the bath with you, doesn't care if he ends up all bloody, he's used to it anyway

You were out again, after he had told you multiple times to stay back at your shared home. He found you trying to fix one of his guns you knew he used a lot in missions, fumbling with it on the desk.

He always thought you looked way too cute to be holding such weapons and he couldn't help but smile at the sight. But then he saw that you were hunched on the chair, remembering why was he here on the first place.

"Works over, you're coming back"

Turning around you didn't even have the time to greet him before he had you scooped on his arms, dragging you back to your room with him.

"I can still walk yknow"

He chuckled, opening the door with his foot.

"Yeah, but you love my arms too"

You sighed as he ploffed you down on the bed, bouncing a bit by the impact and you almost immediately felt the pain again as you got comfortable.

"This is why I hate having no distractions"

You muttered as you hid your face on the pillows, letting him take off your pants for you, lifting your hips so he could slide them off.

"Well, I sure am having a distraction right now"

You didn't even look at him as he patted your thigh. Letting him lift you up to take off your jacket and shirt as he made sure you didn't have to move a muscle while putting your pijamas on. You heard some shuffling behind and you guessed he was getting ready to bed too, already getting yourself comfortable under the covers as you waited for him.

"See? All nice and comfy here, not out there getting yout hands dirty for me"

He pulled you into his arms immediately after laying down on the matress, rubbing your back with his thumb.

"I do it because you deserve it"

Raiden (Jack)

★ this man is an absolute vamp so he isn't grossed out by some blood

★ uses your period just to give you belly rubs, he loves massaging your skin sm

★ like solid, if you are in any kind of pain he is going to be 24/7 on you

★ periods with Raiden definitely consist in constant massages, movies and many, many cuddles

He was sitting on the other end of the couch, watching the movie he couldn't stop telling you about. Looking at you to see your reaction to a particular scene, he saw that something was wrong.

"Do you not like it? We can watch anot-"

"It's not that, I just, well..."

You cut him off and now you were both looking at each other and he could see ypu grasping your belly as you laid down, making him finally figure things out.

"Oh, so It's that again"

"Don't worry I want to watch it either way- what are you-?"

You said between giggles as you felt him move over the small sofa, lifting your body so you were now sitting on top of him, his surprisingly soft hand landing on your chest, motioning you to lay down further into him.

Your lips let out a little whimper at the feeling of new added preassure to your tummy.

"Tell me if you want me to stop or something"

He whispered into your ear as his eyes still danced through the screen and soon, the preassure had became a new soothing feeling.

"Please don't"

He smiled into your hair, hands still rubbing slow but firm circles, trailing lower and then back up, all over your soreness.

You soon found yourself actually watching the movie, placing your hands on his tattoed arms as your nape rested almost on his chest now. Feet supporting yourself on his thigh, you were almost laying completely on him.

[kayuripax]

A Bloodborne Guide for Newbies - How to Hunt and not get discouraged

Heyo! I'm Kayuri. I am a relatively okay Hunter, and played Bloodborne a few times now, and got it Platinum'd. I am by no means an expert, but I noticed people have gotten Bloodborne this christmas, and we have a large new load of Hunters. And this is why I decided to make a guide for the new flesh among us, so they may stay for the long haul.

THIS GUIDE CONTAINS SPOILERS, ESPECIALLY IN THE BOSS SECTION! BE AWARE OF THAT!

Things I will cover:

Things you can do with and without online

General tips and tricks

Caryll Runes (specifically the Oath runes)

Weapons

Builds?

What does scaling mean?

How and where to farm

Tips for Bosses

This will be under a cut, because things can get long here.

Things you can do with and without online:

Bloodborne has an online mode. It costs money to play online. An unreasonable amount, frankly, so don't worry if you don't have it! But not having it removes some options for you, so let's see what having Online allows you to do and what not having online does to you.

The realities of having Online:

You can summon other people to help you in boss battles. This leaves you open to Invaders. Invaders want to kill you. This starts happening once you reach Blood Level 30. If you want to have reliable summoning, I suggest checking out r/huntersbell here!

You can leave and read messages by and for other people. If they rate your note "Fine", you get a health top-up and a notif.

You can see the spectres of people, that show you how others died. Very useful to avoid your own death.

You gain access to online chalice glyphs, like the infamous Cum Chalice. Yes, that name is unfortunate, but it is THE place to get useful echoes.

The Realities of not having Online:

You won't get invaded when you summon an NPC to help you, but you cannot have the help of actual people. If there is no NPC summon, you will need to figure out the boss yourself. See the tips I have further down.

You will not see messages or specters.

You will not be able to use the Cum chalice. That makes grinding for items substantially harder.

Generally, you can play the game entirely on your own! That is possible, and largely what I did! In some instances, playing offline is a boon, even. Namely in the Nightmare Frontier and the first part of the Nightmare of Mensis. In those two areas, if you are playing Online, you are automatically entered into the Invasion pool, and you cannot return to the Hunter's Dream while this is active. You need to find the Bellringer to kill her before you can return. Consider playing in offline in those areas until you are right before the boss.

General Tips and Tricks

First off, this game is huge. There is a lot to do, a lot to do wrong, and how to do things seems overwhelming at first. Let's see if we can't order that a bit, eh?

First things first, don't be afraid to look things up! I personally endorse the Bloodborne Wiki here. It isn't the Fextralife wiki, but it has a lot of data, extremely detailed pictures, and good breakdowns of the weaknesses your foes will have. It also has extremely good guides for chalice dungeons, and where to find things. There is no shame in looking things up, and anyone who tells you otherwise needs to get a grip.

Second! You will die. You will see this a lot.

It's a meme for a reason. Don't worry about it, death is meaningless and teaches you how to do things. It may get frustrating at times, but if you take death personally, you won't have fun. If you die too much in a single region, there may be cause for you to go and grind a bit somewhere else until you are at the spot you want to be. Maybe you need to get more familiar with your weapon. Maybe you need more echoes. Go and grind a bit somewhere, and get familiar with movesets - both yours and your foes'. You will lose echoes. That happens. It will become less and less of an issue over time. Try not to use all your coldblood dew in one go, it's nicer to have a solid stock of echoes to have for when you are maybe a hundred or a thousand echoes off from the next big level up.

Third up: Before you do anything else, level up your vitality. That's your health. You need to be able to tank at least one or two hits, or you'll go down like a wet sack of flour. Attack power can come later, you need to be able to survive for now. Your first order of business once you get access to Miss Doll is to level up your vitality to at least 20 if not 25. Then you may focus on the attack power. Don't be me and level up one of your attack stats to 25 and stay with your health at starting level until you get to the Bloodstarved Beast. I mean, you can. But it will make things more dangerous. Endurance is useful too, that is what you use to hit and to run. I personally consider vitality a bit more needed though, I did two game runs with barely leveling endurance and only really got to it now in ng+2.

Fourth: Get out of the starter clothes, but feel free to have fun with dressing up. Clothes have stats, yes, but the clothes will not save your life. It is better to dress how you want to than to dress for stats. There are very few instances where those will actually save your life. The few points I can think of are when poison is involved, and when you need to avoid Frenzy. Aside from that, just have fun with it! There is no fashion police unless you are invaded by them. Style goes hard, and fashionborne is a thing.

Fifth: If you are coming in from Dark Souls or Elden Ring, I have to tell you that you need to forget that shields are a thing. They will not save you. There are two of them in the game. One protects against magic and is dlc only. The other one is less than useless and even described as such in the item description

You parry with the power of Gun. The timing is roughly equal to Dark Souls 1 parry times, and it is easier to do it than you think! If you parry shoot someone, you have a chance to go in for a visceral, which will deal a good chunk 'a damage to your enemies. Viscerals primarily scale with Skill, so consider leveling that up a bit. ^^ A Visceral is essentially a riposte. After you shoot an enemy by using L2 or hit them with a charged R2 from the back and it is staggered, if you get close and tap R1, you get a Visceral attack. This works from the front or the back on general mobs, but bosses tend to have specific spots to Visceral.

Sixth: Don't go into the DLC as soon as you can. It is brutal. You will die. It is end-game scaled. I have seen recs that say to do it after you killed Micolash. Others even put it after the Wet Nurse. Generally, don't do this until you are at least at Blood Level 80, better yet 90, and have a well upgraded weapon.

Seventh: You will see NPCs die here. You will not like that. Sometimes the best way is to never engage them, but you will learn their fates the first time. it will happen. It will hurt. If you want to save as many as you can, look it up on the wiki. It's going to be okay in the end. But it will not be fun at all times. If people can be spared, try to do that. There are too few friendly faces in Yharnam already.

Caryll Runes (specifically the Oath Runes)

You will get access to an item called the Rune Iron after defeating the boss of Hemwick Charnel Lane. This allows you to equip Caryll runes of varying effects. Most of them enhance a stat or allow you to carry more items. Experiment a bit with them until you find something you like. I won't dictate which runes to use. No, what I want to talk about are the Oath runes.

If you come in from Dark Souls, you are likely aware of Covenants. These runes work similarly. Depending on whether or not you have the DLC, you have between 4-6 covenant runes. Two of these are in complete opposition, one may result in increased pvp.

I will let this picture make the work for me, and elaborate a bit on best uses after that.

As seen, there are six runes:

The Cainhurst Vilebloods, also called Corruption, obtained by talking to Queen Annalise. If equipped, you will enter pvp when summoned by an Executioner, or if you summon one yourself. The rune will heal you a bit as you are near death, and this mechanic doesn't rely on being online.

The Executioners, also called Radiance, obtained by letting Alfred kill Queen Annalise. This rune does the same for pvp as the vileblood rune. This rune increases the percentage blood vials recover your health by by about 2%.

The Hunter of Hunters, the Hunter rune, obtained by finishing Eileen's questline. It speeds up the stamina recovery rate by 6%, and if you summon, there is a low chance that the one you summon or are summoned by is declared blood mad, making you an adversary. You will need to defeat them.

The League, also known as Impurity. Impurity heightens your hp by 2% during cooperation, and makes it easier to find help during summoning.

Beast's Embrace, a rune that transforms the hunter into a more bestial state, obtained by defeating Laurence the First Vicar in the DLC. This rune doesn't affect pvp, but enhances the moveset of the beast claw weapon.

Milkweed, a rune that transforms the hunter into a Lumenwood, obtained by helping the npc Saint Adeline in the DLC. This rune heightens discovery, making it easier to find items, and enhances the moveset of the kos parasite weapon, a dlc exclusive.

WEAPONS

Aaaah, the Trick Weapon. The cornerstone of a Hunter's arsenal, and something you need to pay attention to!

Your weapon can break. If you see the "weapon at risk" notice, it's time to go into the dream. Your weapon does half damage at that point, and you do not want that. You need every chunk of damage you can get.

Weapons can, as the name trick weapon implies, trick. They have two modes, and these modes differ. Most of the time, not just in the moveset, but also in how they deal damage. This is important, but not to the point your preference for one weapon type will ruin the game for you.

Weapons can broadly be divided into three categories, which can be useful for builds: strength, skill, quality. They will scale with one of these majorly, and you will want to level that stat more. Quality builds rely on both strength and skill just about equally. They are the everyman's weapon. It is the more esoteric ones that rely on Arcane and Bloodtinge.

Don't lock into one weapon from the start, dear hunters. Don't give a rat's arse about some other person's tierlist of weapons and their stats. Just about everything is viable if you build it for yourself. I personally use a saw spear the most, and for my first run, used a Chalice Gylph to get early access to a Burial Blade for large-scale crowd control. These days, I have exchanged that one for multiple other weapons, each of which is good for a different purpose. You don't have weight limits. Carry what makes your soul sing, and use whichever weapon makes you happy.

Blood Gems can make or break a weapon, sometimes do both, and at times do so literally. Some blood gems make your weapons break faster. They hit like nothing else at that point though. Blood Gems can be found all over, but primarily so in Chalice Dungeons, and they extend the ways your weapons can be used. Experiment a bit with them, but pay attention to the shapes they have. Some can only be used in certain slots.

Upgrading your weapons is crucial in this. You need Blood stone for that. It takes 16 items per upgrade material tier. 3 for the first, 5 for the second, and 8 for the third upgrade of the tier. 16 Blood Stone shards to get a weapon to +3, Blood Stone Twin Shards to +6, Blood Stone Chunks to +9, and then the final price are coveted Blood Stone Rocks, which allow the final upgrade to +10. Depending on whether or not you have the DLC, there is a limited number of them you can get per game cycle. They can be farmed, but they are rare. Think carefully about which weapon you want to get to +10.

Weapons come in variants. These Lost and Uncanny variants are found in Chalice dungeons, and they have different blood gem layouts. Use that to get some variety, or to acquire a weapon early. ;)

Builds?

I bet you heard the word Builds before. It carries weight, and it tells you what your character is good at. Now, don't worry. You don't need to make those from scratch. The wiki I linked before has a few build guides. Often, builds decide which weapons you can use best. There is no shame in experimenting a bit, in mixing and matching.

Generally, builds are very useful for pvp. It makes you pvp optimized, and the pvp level rests at around 120. You can of course level higher! In fact, the cap is at 544, so 99 in each stat. The return for stat investment you see diminishes at a certain point, the hard and soft caps. That's okay, it is expected.

I personally tend to run skill builds. Strength builds are just as viable however, as are bloodtinge or arcane builds. They are all damn useful, and they are all fascinating to play. Your starting class can help, but in the long haul, it barely does anything.

First and foremost, have fun with it. Do give a look to this site though if you want a few build ideas.

What does scaling mean?

Weapons scale. That means that they depend stronger on one stat than another. The scaling of a weapon improves as you upgrade it. A weapon with a D scaling in strength is going to rely less on it than a weapon with an A scaling. Scaling determines bonus damage your weapon does, and it's shown by a + symbol next to the raw damage number.

Does higher scaling make a better weapon? Technically. And yet, despite that, someone with a fully upgraded Simon's Bowblade can and will die to someone who is naked and running in with a broken, not upgraded saw cleaver that yells cowabunga. It's the player that makes or breaks a weapon.

How and where to farm?

Farming is essential. You need vials, and you need bullets. And you sure as hell need echoes. You gotta get that off the ground before you can get a Chalice to use the unfortunately named Cum chalice, and if you don't have Online, you can't rely on that. Farming can and will get easier once you got a steady supply of Bold Hunter's Marks too, since they allow you to respawn without losing your echoes, so consider investing in some of those! This site has a few guides, but here is a short list of my favorite places to farm some stuff:

Blood Vials:

These drop from Scourge Beasts and Large Huntsmen a lot. Brick Trolls are practically guaranteed to drop between 2-3 of them. Those are not easy foes at first. If you have opened the shortcut to Gilbert's house, you can farm them somewhat easily from the scourge beasts on the bridge by luring them towards the entrance of the house leading to the Bridge. just clear the people inside first. The scourge beasts don't fit through the door, and if you have the axe or cane, you can safely dispatch them one at a time.

Large huntsmen are vulnerable to being parried when they have their arms raised the highest, but if you have a reasonably fast weapon, you can stunlock them. If you manage to sneak up to them from behind, do a charge attack (long r2) and they immediately become vulnerable to a visceral. Use that window to get 'em!

Brick trolls kind of suck to parry at first, but they drop blood vials rather reliably. They are easy once you get used to their timing, but they are intimidating. Don't be afraid to land potshots, and run away if it gets too dicey.

Bullets:

Your thighs. Don't be afraid to stab yourself via Up on the d-pad to get 5 extra bullets, especially if you have a surplus of vials.

Any mob with a musket will drop bullets. If you feel like chancing murder alley, there is one near a carriage pretending he is asleep. kill him, loot him, to the nearest lantern, rinse and repeat.

Bloodstone Shards:

Those drop from the sewers and the large huntsmen there about as often as blood vials. Be careful and you won't waste for getting your weapon to +3 before you know it.

If you haven't done the sewers, Old Yharnam has a good spot. It makes me feel a bit bad because I like Djura and he says beasts are people, but the area he can't see, near the church and over the bridge has about 4-5 scourge beasts and a lot of beast patients that you can kill relatively easily. they drop a lot of echoes and shards, and you can use those. They drop vials too, and sometimes even beast blood pellets.

Echoes

Broadly said? Everyone and everything. That doesn't help you, I know that. So let's see what I can go with that will help y'all in actual places...

Central Yharnam: The house behind Gilbert's. You need to open the shortcut for it, yes, but it's good farming. You got slow yharnamite hunter mobs, and you can easily get them down, and then there is the bridge right at the top where you can lure the scourge beasts to the entrance of the house. you will be inside and can kill them cheaply. Do not go to Murder Alley, aka the long bend at the start. That is hubris talking. Also consider the bridge at the aqueduct. if you go to the middle and then run back and go somewhat down the ladder, the huntsmen get bowled over, quite literally. Bowling for beasts nets you a fair bit of echoes for little effort.

The Cathedral Ward: There are three church servants and some fat crows in the back area of the chapel. If you kill those, you learn the parry timing of the servants (when they raise their staff), and you get echoes. The servants drop bullets and vials. It's good. Then go to the outer courtyard. two more servants. one to parry, one to let walk by and sneak up on with a backstab visceral. Beware the amygdala in the corner, it's grabby.

Old Yharnam: Don't focus on going through this area the first time without damage. Just try to survive, and if you gotta kill beasts, it happens. DO NOT GO UP ON THE TOWER! That way is Djura. Djura can be befriended if you stop hunting the beasts of Old Yharnam after defeating the boss Darkbeast Paarl. I like sitting with Djura, he's cool. Anyways. If you get through Old Yharnam, you will eventually reach a church where a beast bursts through the doors. Go inside and up the stairs, and you unlock a shortcut all the way back to the start. now you got an area for the easy farming of echoes, about 3-4k per run. you go down the church, and then go at the 3 scourge beasts on the bridge as well as the three beast patients coming in. Then you turn around, sneak up on the screaming beast patient in the fog, and backstab-visceral her. Try not to get poisoned by that scourge beast there. rinse and repeat as needed.

The Forbidden Woods: Why do you want to farm here. This thing has poison. It has snakes. eugh. That said, once you get the shortcut to valtr open, he has a thriving snake habitat next to himself. It's a decent farming spot. I try not to be here, I don't like this place.

Hemwick Charnel Lane: Your best bet to farm here are actually the mobs right in front of the boss room. Once you got the Witches down, you can go back up and take care of the 3 grave women, the executioner, and the dogs there. that gets decent echoes!

Yahar'gul: No. (you can get twin stone shards there. the chance for it is abysmal. don't be me. Do not farm there for 18 hours only to give up without the shards you wanted. You can get twin stone shards elsewhere.)

Cainhurst Castle: You should probably not grind in an area with little guardrails and open roofs, but you do you. If you can deal with potentially being stunlocked by enemies screaming at you, the library is a decent spot.

If you have Online, discard all of these after getting the Pthumeru Chalice. Once you have that, and can use Chalice Glyphs, you will want to enter the Glyph code CUMMMFPK. This will generate a chalice dungeon that will, without fail, drop you nearly 90k echoes for doing nothing but standing in the entrance area for like 5 seconds. I advise using those echoes to buy items rather than to level up, but that choice is yours entirely.

BOSS TIPS

Here we are at last. Took me a good while, but here we are! I will try to do this with some pictures to break up the monotony. Gotta announce them in fashion, after all.

Cleric Beast

This bastard. Utter Tool. screams like the damned. Here's the rough sitch and the damage breakdown:

Hates fire. Is a beast, and thus vulnerable to it. Pack molotovs if you can.

Gets extra damage from serration due to being a beast. The saw cleaver and saw spear are your best friend if you are a fresh player, as is the transformed threaded cane.

Get Father Gascoigne's help if you can and haven't fought him yet. He does decent damage against it, for all that he doesn't heal himself. He will play meatshield quite well! He is found at the fountain near his house, where you can see a brick troll bang away at a door.

When the beast screams, it won't attack. you can use that to whale on it. Don't get too comfy though.

It is surprisingly fast, but turns slowly. If you are behind it, you can slash at its ankles.

It can be parried. isn't easy, but it can be done. Sometimes you get insanely lucky and do it with a throwing knife. Don't focus on the visceral. Slow and steady wins the race.

Father Gascoigne

Congratulations, you met the first mandatory boss. Congratudolences if you are like my dear girlfriend and his voice does it for you. You will get your shit kicked in summarily.

He has two and a half phases. Yes, i mean that as i said it. He has a Human phase, and a beast phase. About one-third in, he will transform his axe. that extends his already ridiculous reach, and it will be announced by a voiceline. You'll know it when you hear it. He can still use his blunderbuss despite the transformed axe. The computer is a cheating bastard, I guess. The beast phase kicks in at a point between half and a third of his health being left. He will hold his head, shriek, and transform into a beast. At that point he drops his weapons and will go for claws.

Gascoigne is a mirror boss to the Hunter. He fights like you. And it is meant to be hard. He is in a crowded arena, and that is not easy to navigate. But just as you can get stuck, so can he. Use that to your advantage to get healing in. Don't get greedy attacking him.

If you found his daughter, you will have a music box. Using that will make him stop attacking for a bit and howl in pain. You get four uses of that total. Three in human form. After the third usage, he will transform into the beast prematurely. His beast form only weakens from it once. He will howl in pain, and you can slash in. If you have trouble using the box, go up the stairs and towards the roof, but do it carefully, since you still want to be able to hit him after it works. This will go for beast and person both.

He is far more mobile as a beast, and can destroy the gravestones. If you are careful with that, you can get yourself some room to maneuver. I do not recommend that, frankly.

His human form doesn't have a particular weakness you can exploit early on, unless you want to stagger him. In taht case, use the kirkhammer. I have it on authority that it makes him stagger like a drunken man. After transforming, he is weak to serration and fire like any other beast. Don't waste molotovs, he is liable to dodge that.

If you need breathing room, up the stairs and down to the roof, and back into the graveyard. he tends to follow you, and that can buy you good time because he needs a bit to get down on the roof.

The Bloodstarved Beast (or as I call it, Old Raghead)

This boss won't win beauty awards. what it will win is your annoyance.

This beast is weak to serration and fire, business as usual.

It does however deal poison damage. It's blood is poisonous, and it is fast and likes to make grabby hands.

You should in fact try to bring in Alfred as a meat shield. It will raise the boss health, but he can distract it well enough.

You need to dress in poison resistant clothes. Gascoigne's garb has superb poison resistance and is good for this.

Pack antidotes. As many as you can. For the worst case scenario, the back of the arena has about 3 more. You will need them.

Keep molotovs handy, and the fire paper cooperating with Alfred gives you. You can find two more at the top of the shortcut church in old yharnam. They coat your weapon in fire for about 60 seconds each, and that is hella valuable.

This thing is quick. If it screams and the skin flaps, haul ass backwards because it is about to let out a cloud of poison

the third phase has not-so-fun gimmick: permanent poison aura. get fast, know when to use your antidotes, and have blood vials handy.

the hunter torch you can find near the shortcut door can make a decent substitute weapon here if you ran out of fire-paper. it won't do much, but it does fire, and that is sometimes just enough. If you have the flamesprayer, that is very neat too.

In theory you can parry this dude. I never managed it. props if you do.

You may get frustrated at dying. That happens, and is a part of it. I can't tell you much aside from the fact that you may wish to dodge forward rather than to the side or backward when it goes in for a swipe, because that allows you to go under it and gives you access to the back. You got this.

Old Hunter Henryk

Henryk is technically not a boss. He sure as fuck still feels like one. He is sitting at a horrendously high blood level for the point you find him at. If you don't want Eileen to die, you have only one true shot at this. So here is my list of tips for this crochety old bastard.

Just like Gascoigne, Henryk is a Hunter. That means he will fight like you. Unlike Gascoigne, Henryk comes with a you-sized hitbox as well. On one hand that means he can't reach you as fast. On the other hand, you can't do it either. You win some, you lose some.

Henryk packs a pistol, unlimited throwing knives, and a saw cleaver. Said saw cleaver has been upgraded so it hits harder.

Henryk is very prone to shooting and parrying you, especially if you go in with r1 attacks only.

You can save yourself some runback if you don't mind having a longer run through the Cathedral Ward. Before opening the gates for Eileen to come in, spawn in at the Tomb of Oedon. The initial runback if you die before engaging Henryk is longer, but if you die against Henryk, you'll respawn right in his face. Consider that worth it, especially if you want to keep Eileen alive.

I would advise you to try and learn to sneak up and visceral attack. If you come in from Oedon Chapel, and you walk slowly, you can drop onto the roof where Viola's corpse is, and can sneak to the back of Henryk, as long as you practically hug the gravestones. If you then charge and r2 him, you get a free visceral to start this battle off with. That can make or break it.

Henryk's health bar remains reduced if you die in the fight.

Eileen will jump in after like a minute. Henryk is highly likely to visceral her. Once eileen joins, shoot henryk. use all your ammunition on this. Shoot him. shoot him and make sure he doesn't visceral her. Take potshots with your main weapon if you can, but once eileen is there, focus on harrying him. bleed yourself for bullets if you have to, use throwing knives, and if you got some from the cathedral ward, poison knives work on him too.

If you die against him, that isn't the end of the world, but it will make things difficult. try to keep Eileen alive, shoot henryk. That and the entrance visceral tends to do the trick as far as i have learned. Maybe use fire paper or bolt paper if you have that, but don't activate that right behind him. do it from a bit away. He can hear the application, and doing that ruins the entrance visceral.

Darkbeast Paarl

Paarl here is a fun boss, as far as I think. It is also prerequisite to befriending Djura. Paarl is also a bit of a hard nut to crack, especially if you lock on to it. The camera is a bit of a bastard.

First off, you need Lightning resistance. I'd personally suggest doing Paarl after you help Eileen take care of Henryk. He is right above Paarl in this, because Henryk does practically work as a boss in his own right. Why do I suggest Paarl after Henryk? Because you can buy his set from the Insight Messengers after you kill him, and it has the highest Lightning resistance in the game. I know I said fashion likely won't save you. In this case, the lightning resistance will however afford you at least one more hit to tank, so wear that. You will be blindingly yellow, but it's better.

Paarl, as a beast, is weak to serration and fire.

You can have summoned NPC help for Paarl. Depending on what you have done so far, you can get either Defector Antal or Confederate Yamamura the Wanderer. Yamamura is available if you freed/killed him in the DLC, and when you wear the Impurity oath rune. Antal is slightly better in this instance, because he has a flamesprayer. You can only summon one of them, they are mutually exclusive.

Don't lock onto Paarl, it moves quickly and it is large. That means chaotic camera movement.

Paarl screams a lot, and those screams tend to herald it doing a lightning explosion. Be aware of that.

if you stand underneath it, that tends to be relatively safe until it starts to explode.

Molotovs and oil urns are your friend, as is fire paper. Use them if you can.

After killing Paarl, use the lamp to go back to the dream. then, open the doors and run towards djura's tower without killing the beasts. You will get the chance to spare the beasts. spare them, and he will stop shooting at you and give you the powder keg badge and a gesture. Friends are rare in yharnam, and the top of his tower is a nice spot to relax for a bit.

Vicar Amelia

Amelia is not as hard as one thinks.

She is a beast. that means serration and fire. you know the drill by now. ;)

You can summon Old Hunter Henriett to help here. She has a kirkhammer and a repeating pistol. She pulls her weight, and does a good job! Summon her if you got insight to spare.

Vicar amelia has large telegraphed swipes and can be dodged into. If you have Henriett, she reliably goes and becomes bait.

If you did well with the Cleric Beast, this all applies to Amelia as well. She is after all a cleric beast as well.

Amelia tries to heal in her later phase, when screaming. She gets a white-ish glow, but you can easily outpace her healing with damage. If you aren't confident in it, throw some Numbing Mists at her.

I... don't have many tips for her, she is, all things considered, a bit of a "repeat what you learned" case of a boss. Not that hard, but also not really introducing new mechanics, y'know?

The Witch(es) of Hemwick aka granny wants your eyes

This boss can be cheesed if you are willing to get rid of all your insight.

If you have insight, they summon Mad Ones. The easy way to circumvent that is to enter the arena, see the boss, bold hunters mark out, and then spend all your insight in the dream. that way, the witches can't summon mad ones, and on their own they are relatively harmless. They go somewhat invisble, but that isn't a big issue when you run close.

Once you kill the first, a second witch shows up, and if you let her, she will revive the first. The second one doesn't really do stuff for the boss health bar for some reason, but you do need to gank them both.

Really, just do yourself the favor and spend the insight, it makes this all so much easier.

Shadows of Yharnam

These proto-nazgul are not all that fun. There are three of them, and they have different weaknesses. We have Candle, Sword, and Mace.

You can summon for this, if you have the Impurity Rune equipped. You can get the Younger Madaras Twin or Henryk. I would personally go for Henryk, as he has higher health and also intelligence. Younger Madaras Twin can and will get lost in the forest. Henryk doesn't.

Your best bet is to focus on one of them at a time. For all that they have three health bars, they share a trigger pool, and when one of them reaches a certain threshold or their combined damage does, they go into phase two and sprout snakes. You will want to have gotten rid of one of the pyromancers at that point, or at least have them close to that.

I would suggest spending some insight to get shaman bone blades. If you did that already, excellent! they are a close quarter item, and if used on enemies, makes them attack other enemies for a bit. That is tide-turning here, so use them. You can have three of them, and they are worth it.

The one with the fireball has the least hp, the sword only one the most.

When they enter phase two, they have a vastly extended reach. try to move in close and be quick, and be liberal with using elemental paper, it's a small bonus. I would personally suggest bolt, but fire does it just as well.

Once two shadows are dead, the third gets the power to summon snakes. they are large. they hurt. Be quick as you can be once the other two are down, because he won't wait that long to summon them.

All in all, divide and conquer is your main strategy. Get Henryk to help you, he is really good here. Good luck.

Rom the Vacuous Spider (photo a stand in because arachnophobes)

Rom is... well, she is a summoner.

Rom is weak to Bolt and fire does a nice chunk of damage too. If you have it, use the Tonitrus. She also takes extra damage from Kinhunter gems.

You can summon for this fight. The options are Henryk, The Younger Madaras Twin, and Mensis Scholar Damian. All of them have their uses, but they are mutually exclusive. You can summon Henryk AND the Madaras twin, or Damian. Henryk is a good damage dealer, but Damian uses the Choir Bell, which means an additional source of healing. You need to decide which you value more in this case.

Rom will not attack you the first time you enter the arena. That gives you some time to prepare. Your first strike will not damage her, it will merely aggro her.

Rom teleports three times. During her curl-up animation, you can still damage her.

Rom will summon a horde of her children to fight you. Their front is hard to damage, because their faces are practically stone. This holds true for Rom too. Going in from the side is your best bet.

After she teleports the first time, Rom will begin to summon meteors. Meteors deal arcane damage and it sucks. When she teleports the second time, she gains access to ice spikes. they also do arcane damage.

Rom is a war of attrition. You should go in from the side, and if you have it, use your flamesprayer buffed with Bone Marrow Ash. that can eat through her health quite well!

I strongly encourage summoning someone to help, that makes the romlings manageable. their health isn't affected by the summon, unlike rom's own.

When you approach Queen Yharnam after the fight, you will transition into the Blood Moon Phase. I strongly suggest you save who you wish to before that, and tie up loose ends. You can teleport back here via the lantern at any time.

Amygdala aka The Surveillance System of Yharnam

This is the Amygdala. It is a Great One proper. Despite that, it isn't all that difficult in this instance. It only gets bad in the Defiled Chalice.

Amygdala is weak to Fire, Bolt and Arcane. It does not get bonus damage for Beast or Kin.

Amygdala has a huge lower area where you can stand practically unmolested. If you hang around behind it, amygdala will eventually jump, and try to land on you. If you take two steps forward and have a weapon like Ludwig's Holy Blade or the Burial blade, and charge the r2 in full, you will nail it right in the head after it lands. That deals a shitton of damage, and is in fact the best way I can tell you to damage it.

Amgydala will summon a laser in a zigzag pattern. Not the most fun attack, but when you get close enough, that isn't a problem anymore.

When you damage it enough, it will throw a tantrum and tear out its arms to use as clubs. The jump-bait will still work though, so keep on using that.

The One Reborn

The One Reborn is very weak to Bolt. It does not get bonus damage for beast or kin.

You can summon for this fight. Options are Defector Antal and if you freed/killed him in the Nightmare and wear the Impurity Rune, you can summon Confederate Yamamura the Wanderer. Both are viable in this fight, and you may go for whoever appeals to you more. They are mutually exclusive. Antal carries a church pick and flamesprayer, Yamamura a piercing rifle and a chikage. He can potentially cause rapid poison damage, antal may be better if you want elemental damage.

Heavy weapons will do well, but blunt damage weapons less so. TOR has decent blunt defense, so the Kirkhammer will not do all that well.

TOR has six bell ringing maidens on the ramparts. You need to kill these first, because they will heal it and support it. Once they are down, feel free to have a go at this disgusting mass of putrid flesh.

Both up close and far away has its hurdles. It can stretch to reach you, and it vomits up acid if you are too close. Focus on dodging and keeping yourself alive. Keep the electricity on your weapon, and things will work out.

This boss is more annoying than bad. You can do it!

The Celestial Emissary

Weak to Bolt and Kin gems. This is a failed great one experiment.

This is a bit of a puzzle boss. At first you merely see a lot of walking Kin, with no specially distinguished boss. It will be the one keeping at the back, so try to ignore the ones rushing for you. Keep taking care of them, but go for the one in the back.

After a while, it will grow huge and grow tentacles from the head. This boss does not deal well with thrust damage either, so consider using a transformed saw spear, the rifle spear, or a stake driver equipped with kinhunter gems.

You can use the arena to your advantage to get the smaller kin into a bottleneck near the entrance of the arena, and pick them off one by one. The do respawn eventually, but all in all, this isn't too difficult of a boss.

Ebrietas, Daughter of the Cosmos, aka the big unknowable Girl

Ebrietas is a Great One, and is weak to Bolt, Kin, and Fire.

Her reach is long, and your patience needs to be longer.

You can summon Mensis Scholar Damian for this. His use varies a bit and depends on RNG, but he is decent for this. Use him if you feel like it!

Like with rom, your first attack on her will not deal damage. She is non-hostile at first and at the back of the arena. Damian will not walk in until you aggro'd her.

Phase one she crawls towards you slowly, and goes for tentacle lashes and head slams if close enough. Every once in a while she discovers her inner speed demon and rushes towards you. if she spits blood, have a sedative ready, because it will almost always max out your frenzy meter unless you managed your insight and outfit well.

Come phase two, she will begin using what is a scaled up version of A Call Beyond. She also has an aura that will damage you whenever you are in the vicinity of it.

You can in theory be behind her back and between her tails and continuously deal thrust damage, be it with a fully charged r2 stake driver or a holy blade. This runs the risk of you getting locked in a corner and her killing you though, so use that trick with caution.

Ebrietas is a boss I personally struggled with, and that I don't look forward to fighting again. Just... try to wear her down slowly. Don't get greedy.

The Bloody Crow of Cainhurst

Another member of the "not technically a boss"-squad, like Henryk.

Like Henryk, he hits like a truck. Unlike Henryk, you got unlimited attempts with this one. If you killed Henryk, you will face the Bloody Crow. If you didn't help Eileen, you will face her. I don't know how to fight Eileen, because I got very good at killing Henryk.

He uses Quickening, which means he essentially teleports rather than dodges. He is a bitch. He also uses a Chikage, so he can inflict rapid poison on you. You can poison him too, though. It won't be easy, but you can.

He uses a Chikage (Fully upgraded), a Repeating Pistol, an Old Hunter's Bone for Quickening, and a single Blood Vial. when you get him to half health, he will heal himself up. You can stop that with Numbing Mist if you feel like it.

This will be rough. I won't even pretend you won't be in for the long haul here. This Hunter has more HP than some bosses you faced so far, and he has rather good defenses. He seems to be somewhat weak to Bolt.

He is fast and a bastard and good at inflicting viscerals on you. You need to dodge, and if you are good at parrying, be ready to be disappointed. He teleports away.

You just kind of... Need to be careful here and be ready to dodge. If you got a blue elixir, you may be able to come closer to him than otherwise right at the start, and with some luck and skill, you can possibly get a starting visceral off. That isn't a guarantee, but it's worth trying.

Good luck. Remember, you got all night for this. Unlike Henryk, he can't kill Eileen, and you won't stay dead in any way that matters. If needed, throw everything and the kitchen sink at him. Knives of all kinds, oil urns, molotovs, whatever works. Try it all.

Martyr Logarius, the Corpsicle

Martyr Logarius is a fight where you gotta watch the environment. The roof has no guardrails and you WILL fall off if you aren't careful.

The corpsicle is weak to all sorts of physical damage, and has resistance to all sorts of elemental and poison damage. Just hit him.

You can't summon npc help, but if you can, i support using online to get yourself a proper cooperator.

He is fast and agile, and occasionally he flies, but he is also highly predictable in his attacks.

Phase one he will summon skull spheres. if you run past them and at him, he often doesn't get off more than two, and his scythe telegraphs well. You can stagger him. Just in general, dodge towards him and through the attacks, that works wonders.

Once he drives his staff in the ground, go for that to destroy his armor and stagger him.

When he summons phantom swords, you reached phase two. Phase two means this bastard flies like a pastor on wires.

He becomes more aggressive and chases you down, but that only means more parry opportunities. Single shot firearms work better here than the blunderbuss.

when he flies, attack the sword in the ground, that dispels the phantom weapons.

when he tries to cast a spirit wave, go back. you can't interrupt that. otherwise, parry, parry, parry.

Micolash, Host of the Nightmare, aka Soggy Todd Howard

Welcome, dear hunter, to the worst fight in the game. This is a walking simulator combined with a rage simulator.

Micolash may be a fucking twink, but he hits like a truck. Do not be deceived. He has an augur of Ebrietas, and will use it to nigh on instakill you. He also has A Call Beyond. Be really, really careful.

He is relatively susceptible to poison. If you got poison knives, you may cheese him a little. If you hit him with a throwing knife before getting into his range and poison him (should take 2-3 knives), he will start a cycle of "run, disappear, come back at first spot, rinse repeat"". This will go on as long as he is poisoned. It's slow, but it will help.

Remember to take care of his marionettes, they do hit like hell and can also respawn.

After a while he will go into a single room where you can whale on him until he is at half health, after which he will run again. Not exactly fun to deal with. He will summon two marionettes, so take care of them, and stagger him if you get the chance.

Once in second phase, you can absolutely cheese him, should you have Simon's Bowblade. After giving him the run-around in the upper arena area, you can drop into his end room ahead of time, and approach him from behind. If you stand in the entranceway, you can shoot him in the back again and again, and he won't run into the room you are in, or attack you. This man doesn't deserve the honor of a fair fight. Kill him.

Mergo's Wet Nurse

Congratulations! Depending on the Ending you are going for, this is your final boss. This is Mergo's Wet Nurse. She is a Great One proper.

You may find the music a familiar tune. It is the full melody of the one Gascoigne's music box played.

The Wet Nurse is horrendously weak to fire, bolt and rapid poison. If you have dirty blood gems or a chikage, now is the time to use them.

You can make relatively light work of her by staying behind her and using charged r2 attacks. That aside, beware that she likes to twirl.

This is a war of attrition. She will summon fog and doubles after a while, but the doubles go down to a single hit. once this aptly named Nightmare Fog is over, go back to the grindstone of hit and run with charged r2 attacks.

She is NOT all that threatening, all things considered. The biggest issue is visibility.

After defeating her, wait a while to see the Nightmare Slain message. Congrats, you killed your first higher god! If you go back to see Queen Yharnam now, she will bow to you in thanks.

Gehrman, the First Hunter

This is it. This is the second potential final boss, depending on whether or not you consumed the three cords.

Gehrman is another Hunter Boss. He is distinguished by long reach and rapid burst movement, yet also has relatively slow limping speed otherwise. He has about three phases.

Like every human, he is rather allergic to being electrocuted or set on fire. Bolt and Fire are your friends, as are parries and Arcane damage.

At first, his burial blade is transformed. he will dash in to try and reel you in, and he is really good at that. However, he telegraphs, and that allows you to parry and visceral him. Use that.

After a while, he will transform his burial blade and go in for close combat, This is the point he brings out his own gun to shoot and visceral you. Be aware of the distance his gunfire covers, and dodge with it. Try not to be greedy, he is good at interrupting you.

After a while, he will get to phase three. He will rise into the air and absorb energy before releasing an energy blast. This blast reduces your health, but you can attack him somewhat unimpeded while he gathers the energy. This is where things get tricky, because he will now have an aerial projectile attack, switches between weapon modes at will, and has a bit of super armor. He gets more aggressive, and you need to be able to adapt to this.

If you defeat him and are low on resources, but consumed the umbilical cords, Bold Hunters Mark out. Restock. And then go back in, because you have one more boss to kill.

The Moon Presence, Flora of the Moon

Your last Great One. The final Boss proper, should you have found and used the three cords and fought Gehrman.

You will kill her. That is not optional. You have consumed the cords. You felled bigger foes than her. She is merely the last on the menu and she knows it.

Flora is weak to all elementals. Be it bolt or fire or arcane. Poison will do nothing to her. She is the only entity in the game where it will never proc.

You will want to carry the Choir Bell. She can stop you from healing, and the choir bell negates that.

Flora has less health than Gehrman and the Wet Nurse. She is frail but fast, and uses that. She will jump around the field to fell you.

Her head is her weak point. Aim for that if you can.

Do NOT get greedy. leave yourself the stamina to dodge backwards and escape from her swipes to heal up.

Standing behind her tends to be the safest spot, unless she winds up for a spinning whip attack.

When she makes it rain blood, your healing is being blocked. Use the choir bell, because oh man will you need it. When she uses her Doom Gaze attack and a red shockwave runs out, you reach one hp. no fail. if you can't heal then, you are fucked. HAVE THE BELL.

sidesteps are a good way to survive phase one. Flora has a tendency to attack straight forward.

Good luck. She too will fall.

DLC BOSSES

Ludwig the Accursed/Ludwig the Holy Blade

You have the DLC. That means you have a whole new frontier to fight in, to dismantle. This includes this former Church paragon, Ludwig. He has two phases that are drastically different.

His first phase, he is a beast proper. Serration, fire, the works. He howls and shrieks, and moves erratically.

You can summon for this fight. In the Nightmare Church, you can find Henriett. Slightly hidden in a corner near Ludwig's cave, you find Valtr, should you wear Impurity. I suggest Valtr, as he carries the Whirligig Saw. It doesn't matter much if he is Master of the League or the Beast Eater. Either way, he will work better than Henriett. Furthermore, should he survive, you can gain a Vermin.

Ludwig will swipe and jump in phase one. He will move erratically, try to run you over or kick you, and after a while, the second mouth on his shoulder will spew milky arcane vomit that has a long reach. Ludwig is deceptively fast. Try to stay on his sides to immobilize him, and try not to be backed into a corner.

When you reach the halfway phase, he will transition into the Ludwig the Holy Blade phase. He now fights completely differently. Furthermore, the Beast gem bonuses no longer apply, and serration no longer damages him extra. The game no longer sees him as a beast.

Ludwig now fights with the Holy Moonlight Sword. He has long reach but is slower, and it is in fact possible now to duck under them and anticipate which ones he is liable to use.

If he raises his sword straight up, be ready to dodge to the side. He is about to summon a blast of energy right in front of him. If he holds his sword down, dash back as he is about to unleash an aoe blast.

He is no longer susceptible to side damage, but if you break his super armor in front, he will stagger and you can visceral.

If it gets dicey with blood vials, there are five at the back of the arena, behind the railing. Get them if you need to.

Laurence, the first Vicar

You can summon Valtr for this fight as well. If that is useful depends entirely on whether or not if he wants a dunk in the lava or not. First phase is worth it, third not so much.

Laurence is the only beast not susceptible to fire. He is on fire. If you want elemental damage, go for Bolt.

He is a reskinned Cleric Beast that occasionally explodes into fire. The first two phases are essentially the Cleric Beast again. I would suggest wearing the Charred Hunter garb to avoid burning painfully.

He may be largely the Cleric Beast all over, but that fire explosion hurts like hell. it will come and you will need extra vials for that. Be prepared.

Phase three, his legs dissolve into lava and he turns the floor into a hazard as he crawls after you and vomits up more lava. This is where Valtr's pathfinding ai will suffer and he is liable to get himself killed.

Lead elixirs can make it so you won't flinch from the lava, but it doesn't reduce the damage you can get. Use with care.

In phase three, try to keep to his side, and stay away from the back.

The Living Failures

These fine gentlemen are Kin and failed celestial emissiaries.

They are weak to bolt, fire, kinhunter gems, and susceptible to rapid poison.

They share a healthpool. Being able to inflict rapid poison is a fast way to kill them. The available League summon, Yamamura the Wanderer, may inflict this status. He is a valuable ally, both as a meat shield and fighter.

There are four on the field at all times. two melee, two mages. They will come at you even so. Divide and conquer.

My suggested weapon is a decently upgraded whirligig fully equipped with Kinhunter gems. a transformed, charged L1 or R2 is going to tear through the individual failures and make them need to respawn. In that time, you can go for the next one and reduce them relatively well.

You can use a shaman bone blade to make them attack each other. Enjoy with caution.

When they raise their arms, seek shelter under the lumenflower. They are summoning meteors. Take cover, then right after, shred their health some more.

All in all, don't get greedy and you'll be fine.

Lady Maria of the Astral Clocktower

It's her. The face of the DLC. The former apprentice of Gehrman.

Maria is another Hunter type boss. And by god by golly does it show.

She changes weapon types at leisure, and transforms her rakuyo freely. She is agile, and can visceral you. The animation for that differs depending on character gender, btw ;)

However, you can visceral HER too. She is rather susceptible to it too. You can parry her, be it with the gun or the augur of ebrietas, and shear through her health until she enters phase two.

Phase two starts with her stabbing herself to coat the rakuyo in blood. she now has about double to triple her old range. Be careful of that. She remains fast, and she practically dances around you. You can still parry her, but be aware that she can reach you from halfway across the arena now and deals blood damage rather than primarily physical.

She uses quickening, which makes her rather good at dodging you. Be aware of that.

Come phase three, she will rise into the air and culminate into a fiery explosion. Cheers. Her blood is now on fire. You will be in pain. Like in phase two, her reach is extended, and it isn't really safe anymore to quickstep through her attacks or rest behind her. There is about a second delay between the blood and the fire.

You will want to move in quick and fast at this point, and may consider using the beast roar to stunlock her in combination with a quick weapon like the blades of mercy.

Good luck.

The Orphan of Kos

This boss is a Superboss.

It is a Great One. Unlike its remaining kin, this boss does not get all that much damage from Bolt, and is weaker to Fire.

This boss has two phases and no NPC summon. I would advise to try and get summon help online if you can. If not, that is fine too. Godspeed tho, you madlad.

The orphan is highly aggressive, but won't start attacking until you are halfway into the arena.

The arena has water. I would encourage to stand in there, because you can't fall off, and it is more even than the beach.

The orphan likes to jump and has more range than you think. You can parry it, but I would honestly focus on surviving more. If it jumps, dash forward so it sails over you. Try to stay on its left side, that way the attacks won't hit you as much.

It can be ranged by throwing globs of its placenta. That will explode and have more side range than you think. Don't dodge into it, sidestep. This will still happen in phase two.

Slow and steady wins the race here. This Great One may be freshly born, but it fights almost like a Hunter and it hurts.

I can honestly only really say that you should use firepaper, keep oil urns on hand, and also some molotovs. Some throwing knives too, in case you run out of bullets and vials.

Once it reaches phase two, it grows and becomes even more aggressive. The weapon can't reach as far anymore, but it jumps like a kid on energy drinks and sugar now, and is more than intent to grind you into paste.

When it screams, be aware that the corpse of Kos is now summoning Lightning. Dodge those waves, they hurt. Don't try to attack the orphan, just stay clear.

Don't get greedy, and take it slow. I can't tell you much more. Godspeed. You can do this.

That is it! Good hunting, and may you stay with us for a long long time!

[ravenstargames]

I have to ask since the Grandfather Pride question was asked and melted me: the LI’s age-old meme reactions to the “I want a baby” text 😂 and then their actual feelings about having kids (and how they are with them 🥰)?

FINALLY I have time to answer the second part of your ask, anon! Sorry for making you wait this long, the Kickstarter page is hoarding all my time T_T 💜

✦ The LIs' / ROs' feelings about having kids and how they are with them!

✦ Amon: Kids love him—he's one of the pack, after all! The cool guy with the eye patch! And Amon loves them back, of course, but only for a short while. He gets easily overwhelmed. He'd be fine having one or maybe two kids of his own. Being a parent is difficult, which doesn't mean he wouldn't do his best to be the greatest dad to ever exist, but it'd be a bumpy ride for him for sure.

✦ Raeya: She's used to be a role model for kids, so when they meet her in person, she's slightly nervous about giving a good impression, so it's hard for her to let go and just have fun. She has thought about having kids in the past, but she's not confident she'd be a good parent.

✦ Gael: He dreams of having a family as wonderful as his own. He's very sweet to kids, can read them very well, and would be an amazing, understanding and loving parent. He's a worrywart, though, and tends to pamper and overprotect kids in general, so you can guess that'll become "worse" with his own kids.

✦ Envy: Kids make him nervous and they usually don't like him because of their looks. Also, in general, kids fear him because of what's said of him. He's not cruel to kids in the slightest, but they put him on edge. They don't really like the idea of having kids of their own, unfortunately.

✦ Ara: Ara is the best sister in the world (quotation needed), and kids are obsessed with her because "her hair looks like a cloud and smells like candy." She has a lot of experience with kids and can make the naughtiest child behave like an angel. Wouldn't mind forming a family of her own in the future!

✦ Xal: Scared of kids, uncomfortable around them. He has this perception of kids being usually mean and he thinks they are always judging him. He tends to stay away from them, but that doesn't mean he's not nice to them, or tries to be. Doesn't imagine himself being a parent, but he doesn't dislike the idea.

✦ Father Pride: Well, he has raised six of them, so what can I say! He loves kids. Unlike Amon, Pride has all the patience in the world, never gets tired, and sees kids as little people everyone should learn from. Having more kids, though...........maybe he has had enough of that!

[crosshairs-dumb-pimp-gf]

Thank @feral-ferrule for reminding me of this little aside. Now ya'll gotta deal with it.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Dosing the Batch Boys: (Glitterstim)

In Disgrace (ch3) Crosshair and Tah'nyem are dosed with Glitterstim, a psychoactive variant of spice made by the spiders that live in the caves of Kessel. It lets you read minds...This results in their minds slamming together in new an confusing ways, which is fun for their chapter but it even occurs to them that it might be even funner in bed, let's explore that a little.

Though glitterstim is canon it's underutilized and definitely not utilized the way that I do, so this is very HC based. We're also going to assume that the drug doesn't affect the health of the boys in anyway. (Echo, sweetie I worry about you other wise.)

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Hunter-

I think what would get Hunter off the most about being in your brain is the complete confirmation that all of your praise is genuine. All the boys might be surprised at just how attracted clonethirst girlies are to them but Hunter is particularly susceptible to the flattery of it. Ego boosted, the next aspect he would utilize is the direct feedback for how pleasurable his actions were. You'd probably not get to actively participate as much because he would get wrapped up in feeling what heights he could drive you to.

Wrecker-*let me in meme goes here*

What is going on in there? I can only imagine Wrecker's brain being a kind of messy place, sparks flying back and forth, complex equations drawn in crayon... What would be hot about it is just how overwhelmed with his emotions you would get. With practice he might be able to hold back but without it your brain is getting flooded. Joy, exuberance, and of course the sexual pleasure on a feedback loop. Actually, don't do this with Wrecker, you two are gonna fry.

Echo-

You'd have to ease Echo into this, he'd feel a little self conscious that you might feel any discomfort his implants and prosthetics might cause him, and you would, but having that open map would guide you to new ways to comfort him and make him feel good. He'd also find himself enjoying a type of relief basking in your mind. Like Hunter, he'd be enamored with feeling what he does to you and would try to heighten your experience more than focusing on himself.

Crosshair-

Cross isn't a selfish lover, but unlike Hunter and Echo he's very of the mindset that pleasure is a two way street. He'd more than likely take advantage of the connection by doing things that are mutually beneficial and might yield crazy results via feedback a la 69ing. More closed off and focused, Crosshair would have more control over holding your mind on task, easily keeping you away from parts of him he wouldn't want you to see.

Tech-

Where do I start?

Absolute dog shit at staying on task, once you let this little gremlin loose in your brain he'll start to rip you apart like an engine. Good luck keeping him out of your deepest darkest secrets, your half forgotten ruminations, dreams, and whatever other threads he gets his hands on. Not like it'd be much better, but you can also step into the whirring whirlwind resting in his brain pan. A single calculated thought releases so much mental energy you're floored immediately. There's not even sex yet, and since you'd be a helpless kitten of an rc car hooked up to the power of a jet engine you might as well let him run wild kriffing you within full efficiency.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Not that it moves the plot much besides being way too comfortable with each other too quickly, there are lasting effects of the Glitterstim on CrossXTahny.

She never gets a clean slate with the rest of the Batch Boys since she was exposed quite strongly to Crosshair's opinions of them. His opinions of them directly after Kamino. Yeah.

Also more of a fun fact, in case of alternative dimension shenanigans, Tahny would always be able to pick her Crosshair out of a line up. Even if it's between other Crosshair's that had Glitterstim experiences with other Tah'nyems.

Kids got little tan lines in the shape of each other burned into their brains.

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Queen can I please request prompt 1 from your new prompt list with Xavier Thorpe. (‘’I'm always on your side.’’)

Found myself humming to 'I know places' while writing this 'Just grab my hand and don't ever drop it, my love They are the hunters, we are the foxes and we run Baby, I know places we won't be found And they'll be chasing their tails tryin' to track us down 'Cause I, I know places we can hide' Ah, I love this song!

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

The moment you heard that Wednesday had her accusatory finger set on Xavier, you ran to his dorm to warn him. You had to get him into safety. You had to take him to a place where she — and the police — wouldn’t find him. 

Out of breath from sprinting across the academy, you banged on his door, not caring about getting caught in the boys' dormitories. His neighbors probably hated you at the moment.

When the door opened, you didn't let Xavier place a word. ‘’You gotta get out of here. Wednesday went to Sheriff Galpin’s office and she has all these evidences pointing at you.’’

‘’But I’m not—’’ he began to say.

You shook your head. ‘’It doesn’t matter. We have to leave, Xavier. Now.’’

He slipped on his shoes and grabbed a jacket and followed you into the woods. It didn’t matter to you if he was the hyde or not. You loved him. 

You let go of his hand once you arrived at the small cave. It was cramped and cold, but you doubted the Jericho police would search the woods this deep at night. And since you didn’t take your phones, no one could track you.

‘’We’re gonna stay here until the coast is clear at the academy. I know it’s dirty and cold, but the police are probably gonna search your art shed, so we can’t go there yet,’’ you explained, wishing you had taken a warmer jacket with you. 

Xavier sat down on the dirt and leaned against the stone. He thought Wednesday was his friend. How could she betray him like that? 

You leaned against his shoulder, huddling close for warmth. ‘’I'm always on your side. Even if you’re the beast.’’

‘’I'm not,’’ Xavier said. ‘’I see it in my dreams, but it’s not me. I would tell you if I could turn into a hunchbacked monster with sharp teeth and claws.’’

—

 Wednesday taglist:  @partyfly @hoodforcalum  @achoo---uu @not-leaprvt @xaviersgf  @dragon-chica  @wrldofsage @eddiemunsonsluvrrr @capriaura @officialsaturn  @kelloggs-world @whosljt @ajpanda181 @belovedrey @emerycrt @elizabitchsshit  @lilithlikestoread @est-liber @moonisu @dessxoxsworld  @bellblake121890 @kaldurahms-lover  @nephilimsss  @sweetheartlizzie07 @watermelon-18 @snixx2088 @555stargirl555 @robinscardigan @chumchum19 @lilttblog @aphex2winn @heizenka @mystargirl-interlude @hwrtsiren @babygirljay20  @strangersomeone @charlottelaffin @iheartmaddyperez @starless-starkov @ali-r3n  @poppet05  @ell0ra-br3kk3r  @rhaenyraswife  @teaganthemorningstar  @oliviah-25 @spenglerslime @wetwilliam02 @yellowcupcakes @haileyismoo  @wrldofsage @manofworm @supersanelyromantic  @toylewestinnyc @meme-queen-1999 @rottenstyx @mxxny-lupin @idli-dosa

 @silenzju  @sweeterheartxamerica @renaissancewhxre @jordierama @lilppsblog @harrystylesfp  @katsuki420 @ravenssh1t @kenzi-woycehoski @katsukis1wife @momoewn   @hawkegfs   @mommyruuetrue   @lucassinclairsgf  @starrrslove @marissapearle @sshesang @scarxvodka   @illf4iry  @leoluvsur-pappy  @wenvierismycomfort @pedrosprincess @luvvtxinityy @targaryenmoony @icarly23  @red1culous @kattybug  @slytherinambitious @tommysaxes @adaydreamaway08  @lynbubble @pumkinnroses @under-seasoned-pasta  @hoeforsirius @gizmodecaprio  @tristanswildcat  @niktwazny303  @simonessolarsystem  @rehead1180 @heavenly

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE *  assorted (and slightly adapted to suit this meme format) dialogue from the book by casey mcquiston, adjust as necessary

on purpose. i love him on purpose.

i've always thought of myself as a problem that deserved to stay hidden.

i'm going to have you offed. you'll never see it coming.

take anything you want and know you deserve to have it.

get in there.

you're literally putting your dick in the leader of a foreign state.

before you, i was all right letting everything happen to me.

i can't believe even mortal peril will not prevent you from being the way you are.

sorry, are we not? did i skip ahead again?

you've been warned.

he died as he lived: avoiding plans and sucking cock.

my life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person.

hey, have i told you lately that you're brave?

i honestly have never thought i deserved to choose.

we're gonna make it work. you and me and history, remember?

if you finish that sentence, i'm gonna spend tonight in jail.

but the truth is, also, simply this: love is indomitable.

i actively wish for the sweet release of death.

yes, good, carry on.

i won't hear a word against it.

we're gonna do it together.

i said you look great, baby!

i meet you in every dream, and when i wake i cannot close my eyes again for ruminating on your sweetness.

i'm so in love i could die.

you can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse.

i wonder if it's too late to swan dive off the roof.

i'm learning all your hidden depths today, sweetheart.

you must invent an entirely new system.

a curious thing about grief is the way it takes your entire life, all those foundational years that made you who you are, and makes them so painful to look back on.

he's proof that it doesn't matter where you come from or who your family is.

i've bloody well had it!

we can unpack the ironic symbolism later.

that's beyond our sense of decorum!

i'm not afraid of anything i feel. i'm afraid of saying it. i'm only afraid of what happens when i do.

aw, you do care.

if there's any legacy for me on this earth, i want it to be true.

straight people probably don't spend this much time convincing themselves that they're straight.

the moment you first called me a prick, my fate was sealed.

you are the absolute worst idea i've ever had.

should i tell you that when we're apart, your body comes back to me in dreams?

can you perhaps stop putting your sodding life in danger now?

what are we even defending here?

history will remember us.

when i sleep, i see you.

i hate this so much.

every person who bears a legacy makes the choice of a partner with whom they will share it with.

we're just gonna fucking fight.

he is my choice.

i can appreciate that maybe this isn't your fault.

i've been gay as a maypole since the day i came out of mom.

when i wake up in the morning, it feels like i've just been with you.

i can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache.

your spine's a ridge i'd die climbing.

for a few moments, i can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all.

the phrase 'see attached bibliography' is the single sexiest thing you have ever written me.

i promise you, one day we'll be able to just be, and fuck everyone else.

give yourself away sometimes, sweetheart. there's so much of you.

i want to set myself on fire, but i can't afford for anyone to see me burn.

you see, for me, memories are difficult.

never tell me the odds.

i wish there weren't a wall.

jesus christ, it's like they can see into your soul.

you're it, okay? i'm never gonna love anybody in the world like i love you.

i'm finished. i don't care.

god, i want to fight everyone who's ever hurt you.

the whole world watched, and history remembered.

are you quite finished?

just so we're clear. i'm about to have sex with you in this storage closet to spite your family.

you insane, hopeless romantic little shit.

[xcerizex]

"interest"

Take care, and good night. Make sure to hold me tight and never let go.

"I said not to let go of me...didn't I?"

(doll(?)!cael, cael x little painter, little painter in 2nd pov, tragedy, slight yandere cael????, simple, word vomit idk what happened, inspired by Rope's "Interest Meme", 1.2k words)

You are happy everyday, and it's all thanks to the pretty doll your mother gave you.

"Happy birthday!"

In her hands, a silver fox doll sits obediently within her palms. As if saying hi, you see its ears rustle.

"Thank you, mom!"

You take the doll from her hands and hold it tight to your chest, saying;

"I'll be sure to take good care of it."

You don't ask her where she got it from.

Whatever the case is, you'll be sure to play with it. Holding it up to the sky, you make your future plans, one tea party a day, and a new coat to be sewn by your hand every week, so that this doll may never be bored.

"I think I'll name you...Cael!"

You press your cheek against the doll, breathing in the scent of fresh fabric and flowers, and you giggle.

"Let's have lots of fun together no matter what okay?"

"Hey Cael, today was awful."

You pout, lying over the table as you set him up facing towards you. He sits there silently, listening to your woes without a sound.

"Two of my closest friends fought with each other, I couldn't take it and started crying. Then they started blaming each other again."

You've never liked conflict, and thinking about how your friends are probably never going to talk to each other again, you tear up.

"What if they ask me to pick a side?"

You lament to him without reservation, and the mere presence of him is more than comforting so you continue to talk with no signs of stopping.

"What if I lose all of my friends?"

The side of your head is pressed against the table and you look up to see vaguely see his button eyes shine and gleam. Maybe it's a trick of the light, you think, and don't give it another thought.

"But everything should be fine!"

You stand up energetically, balling your fists and lifting your head to the sky.

"Because no matter what, I'll still have you!"

'No matter what, I'll always be your friend.'

You don't stop talking to him just yet.

"I'm afraid of nightmares."

You hold Cael close to your chest, and your voice is the most despondent that it has ever been, as you express your greatest worry.

"Mom hasn't been feeling well. She says that she'll be fine, but I saw her coughing up blood the other day."

You tighten your grip on him, asking him for comfort as you always have.

"What if she dies in my dreams? My classmates like to say that dreams can make the future come true so if that really happens..."

You can't stop the tears from flowing down your cheeks. So you sniffle, trying to hold everything in but you can't and start sobbing.

"I don't want to lose her, she's my only family. I have no one else."

Your tears stream down in waves for hours and by the time you're done, your pillow is soaked.

But for some reason the silver fox doll remains dry.

"You'll always stay with me, right?"

You're tired, and finally doze off as you ask him a question you know you won't hear him answer for the nth time, but as your eyes close, you hear something.

"Yes."

You wake up tomorrow not remembering a thing.

Every day, you have tea time with Cael and prepare strawberry scones and jasmine tea, before every tea party, you dress yourself up and bow in a curtsy, greeting him like the princess of a castle.

Every week, you sew him new suits and coats of all colours, and most of your favourite combinations often include white and purple. You think it makes him look elegant, and spare no effort in each design.

But soon, those coats and suits will gather dust, and the tablecloth over the tea table shall be replaced with a new pattern to accommodate your new toy.

You are happy every day, and it's all thanks to the pretty doll your mother gave you.

"Happy Birthday."

Your mother presents to you your 13th doll with a weary smile. Her youthful vigor had long been replaced by the wrinkles of time, but even that doesn't explain the exhaustion and effort in which she speaks with.

"Thank you, mom."

You try your best not to cry as you take the new doll from her arms, and toss your old one into a box filled with forgotten friends.

At the very least, you shouldn't worry her and put on a smile.

"Do you want to know why your mother died?"

You stare up at the mysterious man in front of you, his white hair and amethyst eyes contrasting the gloomy scene drenched in black, rain, and white flowers scattered over a coffin. He is beautiful, ethereally so, reminding you of a fairy from the storybooks you'd read aloud to your dolls every night.

"It was because she invoked my curse."

He bends down to look you in the eye at an even level, speaking gently and softly, and you think it is the sweetest sounding curse you have ever heard.

"It is as the old legends say, those who betray the fae are sentenced to have their lives cut short, and your mother–no matter how powerful she was–is no exception."

He lifts your chin up with one finger, treating you as gently as you did with him.

"I'm sorry."

Your voice is hoarse from crying, and you sincerely apologize to him. But he shakes his head.

"I'm grateful to your mother. Even though I had spent many years trapped inside that doll, meeting you was the greatest thing in my life."

His eyes are filled with affection, and he strokes your hair in warm, comforting movements, expressing his adoration for you.

"So it's my turn to make you happy."

"Good night."

You are happy everyday, and it's all thanks to the old doll your deceased mother gave you.

"Happy birthday."

He brings you over to a tea table filled with fresh scones and your favourite drinks. You sit down wearing a gown he designed specially for you–white with purple laces, his colour. As tea time starts, Cael bows to you like a prince from a fairytale. He takes a seat.

"Did you know that faes mate for life?"

He smiles at you from across the table, resting his chin on his folded hands as he stares at you endearingly.

"So please be assured, I have no intentions of ever leaving you. But even then..."

He leans forward to hold your hand.

"You're still afraid of me aren't you? That I'll abandon you the same way you did to me."

Finally, you show signs of life and flinch imperceptibly. Guilt bears down on you like a heavy chain of sin, and you lower your head even further.

"I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have treated you like that."

"What are you talking about?"

He comes over to you and holds you close, presses his cheek against yours the same way you did to him when you first met.

"Well, you shouldn't think about that right now, you must still be in grief." And when he brings up your mother, tears well up in your eyes again as he hugs you, trying to comfort you.

"You can hold me tight, and dream a nice dream."

[richeeduvie]

That visual you shared of Roman with lipstick all over his face made me go AHHHHHHHH 👹👹👹

Anyways, I thought of that meme that’s something like “to be loved is to be changed” and it’s absolutely Roman after Baby, once they get to be happy ofc

I thought of a drunken newlywed Baby and Roman, they’ve had quite a bit of champagne at the wedding reception and it’s around that time where everyone is dancing and tipsy and he has Baby’s lips tip everywhere.

My most pathetic boy deserves that!!! 😭

He has to be the most beautiful groom ever. You don't think anybody can compare.

Roman's perfectly red.

"Can we like? Can we go to Maine, now? Let's get out genitals pinched by lobsters. I had a dream about that when we decided our honeymoon."

"I know, Rome. You told me."

"Why the fuck would I remember? I'm drunk."

"Was is it erotic or more like a standard nightmare?"

"...I'd rather have you pinch my dick."

You smile, kissing your lipstick stain on Roman's cheek. He wipes his neck, smudging the stain there.

"Sorry."

It's a tipsy, mumbled apology.

"Just an hour or two more for that."

"Fuck yeah."

You've got a tipsy head too, but you know Roman would be just as beautiful in the tux and lipstick if you were sober. You'll wake up and it'll hit you well. Your arm comes around his shoulder blades to rub his shoulder, head leaning into his neck.

"You've given me a slutty variation of chicken pox."

"What do you say?"

"Thank you, wife. I find it super agreeable." Roman looks around, hands pressing against each other. "Are we supposed to dance?"

"We can. Or you can just stay here. Get even sluttier."

"...Well, there goes that supposement."

"Not a word, Rome."

"You might as well finish the job and-hey!"

Roman giggles this high, hyena giggle when you peck your lips soft on the underside of his jaw.

"Jesus fuckin-" And he giggles, it fills you up like warm champagne. "Stop poking me!"

"Can I bite your neck?"

You just want him so badly. You deserve him, it's your wedding, after all.

He makes these noises, watching nobody on the floor.

"You want to go all the way with blood? That's psychotic-ow!"

He moans and grunts and groans, eyes squeezing.

"I'm really glad you're my wife. I've got you locked in. You're not going anywhere, good fucking luck with that."

You kiss Roman's bite mark with a smile, leaving him in high groans.

Nobody else gets to bleed by you. That's the least Roman fucking deserves.