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#Did not expect Joi to be this sweet and wonderful~
tennessoui · 2 days
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3 or 60 for the Stacy's mom AU pretty please?
thank you for sending this in <3
[from this list of prompts] / [Stacy's Mom AU]
3. Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.)
honestly as much as they'd both probably enjoy wearing each other's clothing, their styles and color choices are just so different that it's too noticeable and both of them are committed to flying under the radar with their relationship. the most they could get away with is probably anakin dumping his cloaks on obi-wan's shoulders at the slightest shiver from a slightly chilly day. obi-wan now owns like. 12 of anakin's cloaks. he has no intention of giving any of them back.
i imagine obi-wan attempts to give anakin a poorly carved jappor snippet after he reads about the cultural traditions on tatooine. it's really really ugly and it sort of looks like someone's hacked it to pieces and then set it on fire, but master skywalker takes to wearing it religiously.
also i think master skywalker's fascination with obi-wan's hair grows deeper now that he gets to play with it whenever he wants and lace his fingers through it, etc etc, and he takes a lot of calming joy out of playing with it at night if he's awake and obi-wan's asleep, which turns into braiding different sorts of hairstyles into his hair. obi-wan takes to wearing them around the Temple when he's awake - they're much fancier than the padawan braid and much, much more elaborate (because anakin can never do anything half-assed)
60. Who pulls the other closer when they’re sleeping?
lmao ok i think obi-wan's preferred sleeping position is with anakin draped on top of him which anakin is happy to accommodate. but anakin also runs hot, and obi-wan hates being hot in his sleep so anakin often wakes up to obi-wan-shaped fists and feet shoving him away (only to get cold a few hours later and pull him back closer as if he's not a jedi master but obi-wan's personal weighted blanket)
anakin doesn't really mind but he definitely fantasizes about retiring from the Order, convincing obi-wan to follow him, and moving them to some arctic snowy planet where obi-wan is always a little cold and never ever shoves anakin away during the night
snippet (pertaining to question 3)
At first, Obi-Wan is inclined to believe that Quinlan is doing this on purpose, out of some practical joke or in an attempt to tease him and prod at him as if they're still padawans. As if Quin doesn't have a padawan of his own now.
Obi-Wan blinks down at the young girl's upturned face. "Uh," he says, glancing up at Quinlan and resolutely not turning to stare at Anakin, who he can feel shaking with silent laughter beside him.
"Please," Orka adds, placing her hands behind her back. Not for the first time, Obi-Wan wonders how in the Force such a sweet child became Quinlan Vos' padawan.
"Uh, well," Obi-Wan says. "The thing is..." he stares hard at Vos, but the other man just looks expectant and slightly confused, arms crossed over his chest as he leans against the tall duracrete pillar of the fountain behind him. "I think actually Master Skywalker would be thrilled to help you with your hair, Orka."
Quin raises an eyebrow. "Seems unlikely," he mutters, just low enough for Obi-Wan and Anakin to hear. Obi-Wan flushes even as Orka stomps her foot.
"But I want you to braid my hair, Knight Kenobi!" she says. "You have the best hair in the entire Order, all the padawans think so! Please braid mine to look like yours!"
Obi-Wan winces. Behind him, he can feel Anakin's hair traversing up his back to tug teasingly at the end of one of his longer braids. It's incredibly unhelpful. So is the fact that his lover is sitting there and laughing about this whole thing instead of trying to find some way to be helpful.
"The thing is, Orka," Obi-Wan says, clearing his throat. "I don't. Ah. Know how to braid your hair."
Quinlan and Orka both tilt their heads to the side in perfect mirror of each other. It would be cute if Obi-Wan did not feel so incredibly close to humiliation.
"What, you can't figure out how to braid someone else's hair?" Quinlan asks with his eyebrows firmly knitted together. "I'd think it'd be easier than doing your own. Less need to be...you know. Flexible. To get it done. And I mean, I know you're flexible, but..."
Obi-Wan closes his eyes, even as he feels Anakin's chin come to rest on the top of his shoulder. Oh of course, he's no help at all when faced with a youngling's innocent request for assistance, but the moment Quinlan Vos even slightly alludes to his and Obi-Wan's shared sexual history, and Anakin has to say something.
"I braid his hair for him, little one," Anakin tells Orka, reaching out and tucking a longer braided piece of hair behind Obi-Wan's ear. "What Knight Kenobi is too proud to say is that he doesn't actually know how to braid at all."
Orka's eyes widen and she turns to look in between the three of them as if this is an incredible, total betrayal.
Quinlan's own eyes also widen, but he looks more like Life Day has come early. "Oh," he says. "Oh."
"Shut up," Obi-Wan snaps in forewarning. "Whatever you're going to say---"
"But it's always all pretty by breakfast!" Orka protests, eyebrows knitting together. "Do you braid his hair for him every morning? Even before you eat?"
Anakin's Force signature is far too smug. He's enjoying this far too much. Obi-Wan is far too in love with him anyway. It's terrible for his health and his pride.
"Sometimes adults like to have sleepovers just as the younglings do," Obi-Wan says delicately. "Just as the younglings do," he repeats loudly when both Anakin and Vos snort. "And yes, sometimes Master Skywalker enjoys braiding my hair. During those sleepovers."
Mostly, Anakin enjoys braiding his hair either in the aftermath of sex or sometime during the night when Obi-Wan is asleep and malleable and Anakin is kept awake by some nightmare or another. Mostly Anakin enjoys braiding his hair because it's the only sort of claim he can lay on him--not while they're both still Jedi.
And mostly, Anakin. enjoys braiding his hair because he spent years seeing Obi-Wan walk around the Temple with another master's braid hanging down his shoulder, and he'd hated the sight of it.
"Oh," Orka says. She considers this new information before she turns with narrowed eyes to Anakin. "So you can braid my hair."
It sounds like a threat. This time, it's Obi-Wan who has to cover his snort with a cough.
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gay-dorito-dust · 3 months
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Omg I love your benjicot Blackwood fics can you do a x betrothed reader soft fluff please
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There wasn’t many things in life that had brought you happiness, not since you became of an age where it was deemed necessary by your father to start looking for suitable suitors, for you were quick to catch on that life wasn’t fair especially towards the good and honest people of the realm.
They often died too soon, leaving for the rest of the realm to be poisoned and left in ruin by the selfish agendas of the richer and more powerful great houses.
So when you were made aware of your fathers plans, not bothering to ask for your permission in the matter, your initial response was to scream at the old fool of the unfairness of it all but instead you chose to ran for the Weirwoods as though that was going to change anything.
That day whilst terrible as it was, was also the day that you met Benjicot Blackwood or Benji as you liked to call him nowadays.
‘What’s wrong.’ He had asked, kneeling in front of you with a worried look.
‘I’m to be engaged.’ You told the boy with the short dark hair and stormy kind eyes.
‘Do you know to whom?’ He said as he tried his best to figure out what he could do to help, he wasn’t use to this whole comfort thing, but he was more then willing to try and to get use to comforting others for similar circumstances in the future.
You shrug, keeping your eyes downcast so that he wouldn’t see your tear stained face. ‘It is undecided for now but I know in my bones that it’ll be to a gluttonous lord of some unknown house with shady origins.’
‘Why not get engaged to me then?’ Benjicot then said out of the blue.
‘What?’ You looked up at him, unsure you had heard him right the first time.
‘Get engaged to me and you’ll never have to worry about being some shifty lords bed warmer.’ Ben said in a nonchalant mannor, which was soon betrayed by the cherry red blossoming upon his cheeks. ‘We don’t have to be in love it’s just-‘ he was abruptly cut off when you flung yourself into his arms, hugging him tightly as you whispered a million thanks into his shoulder, all the while Benjicot was stiff and awkward as a board before he finally relaxed and rubbed your back.
‘It’s fine, no need to thank me.’ He utters as later that same afternoon the news of your betrothal to Lord Benjicot Blackwood had been finalised, bring about the end before it had even began, and needless to say for the first time you had felt a twinge of happiness for your future.
Now as you stood beneath the very same Weirwood tree you did that fateful day, you sat beneath it with a smile upon your face and peace within your heart. You didn’t think you’d fall in love with Benjicot during your betrothal but you did and you did hard, the man was nothing short of perfect in every way shape and form, you didn’t expect yourself to fall in love with his dark hair, his stormy but kind eyes nor his chapped but kissable lips that withheld the most heavenly laughter you’ve ever heard.
He has made your heart full of happiness and joy that you didn’t know existed in Westeros, he treated you with such kindness, respect and loyalty that you couldn’t help but wonder if you were one of the lucky few to have such a devoted man such as Benjicot. You never wanted to know a reality where you weren’t betrothed to him for every man would fail in comparison, regardless of whether they came from a greater house, for all you ever wanted was a man who was undyingly faithful and wouldn’t dare let his eyes wander and you found that man in Benjicot Blackwood; and ever since then you have been falling for him every single second of every single day.
You had found your soulmate that day without even knowing it as you chuckled to yourself just as a body sat closely beside you, but instead of moving away from it you leaned into it, already familiar with the bodily warmth of your dearly beloved Benji as he pressed a sweet to to the top of your head.
‘You’re smiling today my beloved, is there reason to that or is it just me.’ He joked as you playfully scoffed.
‘I’m merely reminiscing the time we first met, right here beneath the Weirwood tree.’ You told him as you craned your head to look up at the leaves that hung above you both.
‘Still glad you’re not married off to some gluttonous lord from an unknown house with shady origins?’ Benjicot asked as he too looked up at the ruby leaves of the Weirwood, not wanting to admit that after all this time you still managed to make him nervous but in the best ways possible. Your smile widened at your own words being thrown back at you as you looked over at Benjicot and admired his side profile with adoring eyes.
‘I am because my betrothed is the sweetest man the realm has ever seen.’ You told him as you kissed his cheek softly before resting your head on his shoulder. ‘You saved me that day Benji and I am forever grateful.’
‘What did I tell you way back then? It’s nothing that you should thank me for.’ Benjicot said as he looked at you with a soft expression. ‘I’m just glad that I could offer you an alternative solution.’
You looked at him as found yourself smiling as he rested his forehead against your own, closing his eyes as he relaxed again you. ‘You also once told me that we didn’t have to fall in love during our betrothal too.’ You replied as you heard him chuckle lowly, brushing his nose over yours. ‘We did a pretty shit job of that didn’t we?’ Benjicot asked as you giggled and the young lord swore he could hear the heavens sing, for he had fallen first but saw later on that you had fallen just as hard for him in return, which he thought was solely because he had gotten you out of a predicament you didn’t want to be in.
You would later prove to him that that wasn’t the case at all and that you feelings for him were genuine and true as your heart that beats solely for him.
‘One could assume so, yes.’ You replied, kissing him on the forehead before letting your heads rest against one another once more. ‘But I don’t regret a single thing, word or moment that we have shared since for I love you far too much to depart from your side.’ You added as you moved yourself as close to him as you could, wanting nothing more then to be in his arms and listen to the sounds of his strong heart against your ear.
Benjicot didn’t put up a fight as he was quick to bring you into his strong embrace, holding you against his chest as he back remained supported by the trunk of the Weirwood tree, your head pressed to his heart as it sang its song just for you. ‘I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you cry under this very Weirwood.’ Benjicot admitted. ‘I looked at you and thought how beautiful you looked even when you were crying, which hurt my heart to witness. I want you happy and in that moment I wanted to be the reason you were happy and since then I have only fallen further each and every day, aching to one day call you what I’ve always wanted to call you.’
‘And what’s that.’ You murmured against his chest, his warmth providing you too much comfort that you were on the periapsis of falling asleep.
‘Lady Blackwood.’ Benjicot said as he pressed a kiss to your head, finding the same level of comfort you had as he too was fighting his hardest to keep his eyes open to gaze upon you longer, but alas his eyes were already closed and he smile widened as he thanked the gods for weaving your strand of fate with his own that fateful day under the Weirwood tree.
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faeriichaii · 8 months
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hi!! i’ve never requested smth before but your writing is so good im gonna give it a shot💫 could i request a legolas x human reader where she somehow accidentally touches his pointy ears not knowing that they’re sensitive for elves and legolas asks her to keep doing it (fluff/like half smut more like teasing maybe?) and legolas is just this soft baby who begs her for her touch 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫
Sensitive ~ Legolas x Human!Reader
A/N: Thank you so much!! You're like so sweet <33 Oh that sounds very interesting 🤭 I like the idea!! I think I once read like one with a bunch of the elves where the reader accidentally touches their ears and like!! So I hope you enjoy the story <33 (and ngl I was so close to turn it into a smut rip)
⇢ ˗ˏˋ Warnings: fluff, lil bit smut (if you squint your eyes) ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Words: 875 ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Request: Yes (thank you <33) ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Meleth Nin ~ My Love ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Aini Nin ~ My Angel ࿐ྂ ⇢ ˗ˏˋ Gi Melin ~ I love you ࿐ྂ
Summary: You knew that Legolas could endure quite a lot, but what you did not expect is his reaction to touching his pointy ears
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You loved keeping watch during the night. Everything seemed so calm and quiet and it was the only time of the day where you really get the chance to be by yourself. Where you get the chance to think about everything that happened so far and everything that still has to come. Sometimes Legolas joins you during your watch times. These were your favourite moments with him. You always have the most wonderful talks and share your thoughts with each other.
Being alone with him fills you up with joy and warmth. One could almost say you get drunk by his intoxicating charm that he shares specifically with you. Both of you were once more sitting on the logs, around a fire that has been put out for quite some time now, talking about the future ahead. “Do you think your father will like me?” You suddenly asked him, using a stick to draw a heart onto the dirt beneath you. “There is no way he could not. He will adore you as much as I do Aini Nin.”
A bashful smile graced your lips, as you wrote your initial, as well as his into the heart. “I can’t wait to meet your hometown my love. And your father. I want to see everything and get to know all about Mirkwood.” Looking up at him, you caught him already staring at you. His eyes were shining with love and care for you. “And I wish to visit your hometown. Learn all about your family and the customs you share.”
His arm snaked around your waist, in order to pull you into his warm side. Dropping the stick you used for your small drawing, you leaned into him. “Do you think we should take Gimli with us?” A laugh escaped Legolas lips at the thought of the dwarf running around the palace grounds. “I think that would either end up in multiple deaths or banishment on his side.” Chuckling at his response, you leaned your head onto his chest, listening to his heartbeat.
“I love you.” You said, gazing up at him lovingly. “Gi melin, Meleth Nin.” He gave you a soft kiss on the lips, which you immediately reciprocated. You still were looking at him, shining in the moonlight like an angel sent from heaven, as you noticed one of his braids getting loose. “Oh Legolas, can I re-braid your hair?” “Of course.” With that you stood up to take your place on his lap. His hands gently laid on your waist, as you undid his hairdo.
“I wish I had soft hair like you do.” You said, brushing your fingers through his white strands. “Your hair is already perfect as it is Aini Nin.” He softly whispered, as he leaned into your touch. A gentle smile graced your lips. Quickly giving him a loving kiss on his temple, you resumed your work on his hair. Parting the strand into a few sections, you began to weave your fingers through them. The quietness of the forest was interrupted, as Legolas let out a hitched breath. You raised an eyebrow at the sound that escaped him but continued to braid his hair.
His hands tightened around your hips, as your fingers accidentally brushed against his ear. You noticed that his ears slowly gained a red colour by the tips. A smirk played on your lips, as you let your hand brush against his pointy ear once more. Legolas let out another shaky sigh. “Are you alright my love?” You asked him, playfulness evident in your words. “Yes, it’s just… my ears. They are sensitive.” A little giggle left your lips, as you abandoned the braid and instead focused on his ear. You gently let your fingers trail along the pointy form. The elf underneath you let out a soft whine at your touch, slightly leaning into your hand.
His breathing got ragged, hips also moving up into you while pressing you down on him. “Should I stop Meleth Nin?” You innocently asked, playing with the tip of his ear. “No, please. Don’t stop.” A whine followed his words, as you put your other hand around his other ear, massaging both of them equally. Warmth spread through your body at the sounds that escaped your lover underneath you. The elven prince tried his best to keep as subtle and quiet as possible, in order to not wake up the others around you. “Do you love it when I play with your beautiful elven ears?” “Yes.” His breathy answer was muffled, as he hid his face in your neck. “Please don’t stop.” He whispered, giving you a gentle kiss on the exposed skin. Legolas cheeks were rosy and so were your own. You knew that elves could endure quite a lot, but you did not expect them to have wobbly knees after just a touch to the ears.
Suddenly you stopped your little ministration, making the prince underneath you whine sadly. “I am sorry my love, but you don’t want to wake the others now, do you?” You said, smirking slightly at his flustered expression. His hands tightened around your waist, as he brought you closer. His warm breath hit your ear. “You are going to regret this.”
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jjkamochoso · 3 months
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Catching Fire, Catching Feelings, Catch These Hands
Fluff
Kyojuro Rengoku x f!reader
When Kyojuro finds a man bothering you, he's quick to take action.
Warnings: harassment from a stranger
As a high ranking demon slayer, you rarely had downtime so you decided to make the most of it by attending a market while you stayed in your hometown for a few days. You figured it would be wisest to leave your sword at home since they weren't welcome in open spaces and you'd rather not spend the next month in jail for brandishing a weapon in public. You felt bare without it but knew you'd be safe for the time being--it was daytime and you hadn't heard of any demon sightings in the area. Embracing the fact that you were actually able to wear something other than your uniform for once, you set out to get lost among the hordes of people, food, and material items. As you paid for pancakes from a food stall, you spotted bright orange and yellow hair in the distance. There was no way that was Kyojuro, right? He would've told you he was here!
But if he was here, you definitely shouldn't have left home without your sword.
You raced in between the crowd, eager to catch up to your dear friend. Though you weren't a Hashira, you still caught the group's attention as an accomplished Kinoe and found yourself working on missions with them from time to time. You got along with all of them but you were exceptionally close with Kyojuro. He was passionate, kind, and an absolute joy to be around. He was also extremely handsome, but he didn't need to know you'd been harboring a crush on him for a long time.
"Rengoku? Rengoku!"
Your yelling finally caught his attention as you ran up behind him and he turned around, a satisfied smile resting on his lips. When he saw it was you calling his name, the smile grew even wider.
"Y/n! It's always a pleasure to see a friendly face, especially if it's yours!" replied Kyojuro, bowing his head slightly in greeting.
"Same to you. I wasn't expecting to see you here," you said. "Is something the matter?"
"There's been a large increase in demon attacks in this area!" he shouted, earning a few wary glances from passersby. "I'm here to exterminate them!"
"To think I hadn't heard of that at all," you muttered, confusion apparent in the way you knit your brows. "If you need help later tonight, I'll gladly provide backup!"
"That would be fantastic! Thank you, dear friend!"
"Of course," you answered. "Were you exploring this market for work or for fun?"
"For fun! Care to join me in trying these... whatever these are?"
Kyojuro was pointing at a sign that read "Croquettes." Neither of you knew what they were but you were both foodies so you excitedly waited your turn to buy some. Food in hand, you found a place to sit and eat, happy to catch up with each other over snacks. He handed you a croquette as you passed a pancake his way.
"Tasty! You chose a wonderful dish to try," Kyojuro complimented, his mouth full.
"As did you, Rengoku. These are very yummy."
"Please, we're friends, are we not? Call me Kyojuro."
You stopped your chewing in surprise. "Oh! Well, alright then, Kyojuro."
You loved the way his name so easily rolled off your tongue, like it had always been yours to speak. You two fell into conversation about what you had been up to, what he and the other Hashira were up to, and how both of your families were. When your stomachs were full, you continued your jaunt around the market, Kyojuro being a superb shopping companion. You were currently stopped at a stall that sold ornamental hair clips and your attention was completely absorbed by the glittering jewels and vibrant flowers, so much so that when Kyojuro spoke up, you jumped.
"Excuse me for a moment. There's something at that previous stall I would like to buy for Senjuro," he explained, giving you a courteous nod as he left your side for the first time that morning. You smiled to yourself, resuming your browsing. He was always so sweet and considerate and you loved how he never stopped looking out for his adorable little brother. As your mind pondered all the things you admired about the handsome demon slayer, your eyes fell on the most gorgeous hair clip you'd ever seen and you picked it up, carefully inspecting it.
"That's a nice one, isn't it?"
You jumped for the second time in less than a minute, this time due to a stranger's voice in your ear. There was a man standing next to you, much too close for comfort, wearing a grin that made your skin crawl. You didn't want any trouble so you tried to keep the situation as relaxed as possible.
"Yes, it's very beautiful."
"It's not as beautiful as you."
Um, ew.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. Who did this creep think he was?
"I'm flattered, sir," you said, placing the clip back on the table, ready to make your escape, "but I must be going now."
You turned around, eager to find Kyojuro, but before you could get too far, you were stopped by the rough clutching of your wrist by the stranger.
"Hey, where you going? I'm not finished talking with you. I don't even have a pretty name for the pretty face."
You were enraged and wanted to teach this guy a lesson for having such repulsive manners. You instinctively reached for your hip but your hand felt nothing--your sword was at home, discarded on the floor where you'd left it earlier that morning. You cringed internally at your stupidity. Why, of all days, did you decide to be an upstanding citizen and leave your weapon at home? The next thing that crossed your mind was breaking his hand, which you were about to do before Kyojuro was by your side once more.
"If you continue touching my friend, I will not hesitate to cut off your hand!" Kyojuro exclaimed, his voice never losing its trademark cheeriness as he stared the stranger down.
"Yeah, right," the man sneered, "with what weapon-oh."
He spied the sword sitting neatly on Kyojuro's hip, the Flame Hashira's fingers ghosting the top of the handle to show he wasn't messing around. The unwelcome intruder immediately dropped your wrist and backed away, sputtering apologies before practically running from the scene. Kyojuro was no longer smiling as he assessed the aftermath of the situation.
"Are you alright?" he asked, his voice lower than usual. You nodded, trying to calm the blood that was boiling in your veins.
"I'm glad I already ate or that would've ruined my appetite," you seethed. "I just wanted a hair clip. Had I known that man was going to bother me, I wouldn't have stayed over there."
You sucked in a breath as your anger left you, leaving behind a feeling of unease akin to being prey stalked by a predator. "I would like to go home now. Kyojuro, would you mind escorting me? I know I could easily beat that man in hand to hand combat but I'm afraid I just don't feel as safe without my sword."
Kyojuro looked upon you with sadness contorting his features. "Are you sure you want to leave without the hair clip you were so fond of? We can continue browsing the market, I promise not to leave your side again. I will not hesitate to protect you from all threats, human or otherwise, today and all other days."
He sounded so earnest in his endeavor to keep you safe that the idea of you leaving the market early became unfathomable. Also, hearing those words from the man you were falling for left your heart throbbing in your chest.
"Thank you," you said, looking deep into his red and yellow eyes that were practically glowing in the sunlight, "you're consistently there for me and I never know how to return the favor."
He let out a hearty laugh. "Nonsense! Having someone like you in my life is favor enough! Your unshakable character and kind demeanor are incredible. You're a great listener and you give valuable advice. Every day I am thankful that I know you!"
You felt warmth flood into your cheeks at his praise, feeling bashful from his compliments. He just beamed at you, not at all helping to rid you of the giddiness you were feeling.
"Come," he said, offering his arm for you to hold. "I would like for you to show me the hair decoration that has captured your attention."
You enthusiastically locked your wrist around his elbow and led him over to the stall.
"This is the one," you said, picking it up.
"May I?" Kyojuro asked softly, gesturing to the ornament.
"Of course," you accepted, and he plucked the piece from your hand. He tenderly brushed back the hair from your face, tucking it behind your ear. He then placed the hair clip on the side of your head, his fingers gingerly pushing it into place so it wouldn't budge. When he was finished, he didn't take his eyes off you-- his expression held such soft fondness that it was impossible to look away from his magnetic gaze.
"You look beautiful," he murmured. It wasn't the first time you'd heard that today, but it was the only time it mattered. You were so entranced by him that you didn't notice him paying for the clip until it was too late, the money already taken by the vendor.
"Please, let me pay you back," you pleaded as you walked away from the crowded market, finding solace in a quiet garden not too far from there.
"No way!"
"Kyojuro Rengoku!"
"Never!"
"Why not? You must tell me," you demanded.
"Because I want to show you that I..." He hesitated and you noticed that he was starting to blush, his cheeks almost the same color as the tips of his hair. "I want to show you that I can take care of you. In matters of both finances and safety."
You cocked your head. "Wait, why would you..."
All of a sudden, it dawned on you. Was he trying to court you right now?
He noticed you attempting to put the pieces together so he explained further. "Seeing that man disrespect you... I would have helped any woman in that situation but at that moment I knew that I couldn't bear to see another man lay his hands on you."
The Flame Hashira inched forward to be slightly closer to you, his haori swishing in the breeze. "Y/n, I have fallen for you and I wish to be by your side as not just a friend, but as a lover. A husband. If you'll have me."
"Oh, Kyojuro!" You threw yourself into his arms. He stumbled back at the unexpected movement but quickly grounded himself, hugging you tightly.
"I would be honored to marry you," you said, unable to contain your wide smile and thrilled beyond belief that he felt the same way about you that you did for him all this time.
"Wonderful! I am the luckiest man to be able to call you my wife!" he exclaimed.
"So tonight will be our first mission as a couple, then?"
"That is correct!"
You snickered. "Maybe we can defeat the demons with the power of love."
"Hah! My darling y/n, you sound like Mitsuri!"
That was the best compliment you'd received all day.
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dearest-nell · 3 months
Text
here comes your man
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s. harrington x f!reader, 2.1k
summary: you go to pick up your very drunk boyfriend from the bar after a well deserved night out warnings: alcohol consumption, swearing, reader uses she/her pronouns
a/n: i was half asleep when i wrote this so all i can say is my bad, and i hope my three am deleirum brings you some joy
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Hey… you might wanna come pick up your Stevie-Boy. He’s a bit wrecked...
It was a phone call you had half expected, though you didn’t mind admitting that you wished it had not come at 3am on your Saturday night. Steve had been so excited for a night out with the boys – work seemed to be piling onto him more than usual, and more often than not you’d find him half asleep on the couch by 8pm, arm propped uncomfortably beneath his head and back twisting awkwardly. This night came along with the extra TLC you prescribed him this week, taking on a little extra responsibility around the house so he might relax even just for a moment. Steve was a caretaker by trade, and doing things for himself seemed to hark back to a time where he only did things for himself. It took a lot for him to rewire that belief in his brain – self care did not mean selfish, he was a good person. 
You thought that the time out with his friends would remind him of that; how wonderful he was, how loved he was. He could be without responsibility for a night and simply enjoy himself. And enjoy himself he was… you hadn’t heard such an amused lilt to Eddie’s tone for a long time. You spent the drive over pondering just what kind of state your boyfriend might be in, your eyes heavy, body cooling with the iced air that blew through windows opened in an attempt to keep yourself awake. Eddie at least had sounded coherent, so you figured you would not be alone in the battle to try and haul your boyfriend into your beat up car. 
Dressed for the comfort of your own home, it took one disgruntled look towards a stubborn bouncer to let you past without paying an entry fee. You wondered how often this happened – half asleep partners turning up moments before closing to take their inebriated darling home. The thought made you chuckle softly to yourself, body weaving through the stragglers of the night still dancing to a wrapping up DJ. 
Eddie had told you they’d meet you by the lounges when you arrived, though Steve was nowhere to be seen as you approached your tired looking friend, his face pleased, if not a little weary. 
“Where is he?” You questioned, letting Eddie lean down to wrap his arms around you tightly, his weight pressing heavier on you that you had expected under the influence of what you assumed had been many, many shots. 
“At the bar. I thought he’d crashed half an hour ago, but he’s had a second wave.” 
You felt the short burst of laughter bubble up, an unsurprised uh-huh leaving your lips at the notion, eyes drifting towards the thinning crowd collected for the last call. Eddie let you go with a shrug, stepping back to let you go. 
“Alright, I’ll go get him. I’ll wave if I need you, ‘kay?” The nod you received was answer enough, and you set off leisurely towards your unsuspecting boyfriend. 
Steve was half hunched over the bar, palm rolling an empty shot glass flatly across the sticky surface as he waited for an already busy bartender. You couldn’t see his face, but you could picture the expression with such clarity – eyes heavy, blinking slowly as they tracked blearily across the back of the bar, that sweet, contented smile plastered on his lips for no reason at all. 
Following suit, you leaned yourself up against the bar beside him, elbows propping you up to rest your head in your palms. 
“You getting another drink, handsome?” 
Steve made a soft sort of mumbling sound, his head lulling to the side as he leaned away ever so slightly. “Mm, yeah… think so.” 
You nodded, smiling at the way he swayed on his feet. “Oh, I see. You wanna have some water with me?” 
Steve rubbed harshly at his face, eyes screwing shut tightly before blinking hazily at you. “No, thanks.” 
His gaze turned away, his grip on the shot glass faltering for a moment, reflexes only just catching it before rolling over the edge. You reached slowly to pluck it from his hand, though he recoiled sluggishly at the contact, forcing your brow up into a curious arch. 
“How about I take you home, then? Seems like they’re wrapping up.” 
Steve sighed, hands running through his hair in that same familiar flustered motion you were so acquainted with. Ordinarily, Steve would have been bouncing out of his skin to see you, but right now, he seemed like he wanted to be anywhere else. 
“Look, it’s nice of you to ask, but ’m taken. My girlfriend’s comin’ to get me.” 
Oh, how sweet. You’d never seen Steve so far gone that he hadn’t recognised you, but now that you focused your own tired eyes, you could see that his own were barely open to begin with. Your smile widened, amusement settling over you at the sweetness of him. 
“Really? You’re not even gonna look at me? Maybe I’m worth breaking the rules for.” 
He scoffed at that, body straightening up as much as his addled state could allow, his feet stumbling beneath him to put another feet of distance between the two of you. 
“I’m sure you are f’someone else, but ‘m not interested.” His tone was more clipped now, friendliness falling away in the hopes of deterring you. “Not another girl in the world for me but her.” 
God, he was sweet, and more in love with you than you could have ever hoped for a person to be. Your heart ached, entirely overwhelmed with adoration for this man who was waiting for you. 
“Well that’s very lovely.” You cooed, turning sideways to look at him, one arm dropping to your side while the other hand continued to prop your chin up, helping to hide that rosy blush that seemed to stain your cheeks. “I really think you should look at me, though, Stevie.”
You watched as the thought crossed his mind, a slow understanding that something about this interaction seemed out of place. It seemed to take another moment for reality to set in, his body turning and eyes widening comically as they came into focus. 
“Honey!” 
It had you in hysterics, the way his arm gave out from under him, narrowly avoiding his torso from smacking down against the bar top as he lurched towards you. Your arms extended out to catch him, meeting him halfway until his body was pressed tenderly against yours, eager hands creeping up to cup your cheeks, holding your face towards his so he might really look at you. 
“You’re here!” 
Your laughter rang out happily, eyes crinkled at the delight mirrored in his own. 
“Yeah, baby, of course I am. Wanted to make sure you got home safe.” 
If an iris could change shape, then you were certain you saw Steve’s melt into delicate hearts just at the thought of you coming out to take care of him. His thumbs ran adoring lines across your cheekbones, trembling slightly with restraint. 
“S’good to me.” He mumbled, words drowning out within the still deafening music that surrounded you. “Missed you.” 
You felt him slump against you ever so slightly, still conscious of weighing too heavily against you even in his inebriated state, though how he was holding himself up anymore was anyone’s guess. It was your sign to wave Eddie over, though, who without fuss looped a supporting arm around Steve’s back. 
“You gonna let your girl take us home, then? I’m gonna pass out, man, I’m so wrecked.” 
Steve’s brow furrowed, alarmed to have been so suddenly pulled back from you to lean on Eddie, and he reached out a hand in a needy sort of motion towards you. “I wanna dance with her before we go.” 
Too sweet for his own wellbeing, you offered him a sympathetic look, slipping yourself under his other arm to help prop him up. 
“We can dance at home just you and me, okay? In our pjs too — won’t that be nice. We just don’t wanna keep Eddie waiting too long; he’s all danced out.” 
You watched the contemplative look cross his features, leaving him distracted enough for Eddie to start guiding the three of you towards the door without much fuss from Steve. 
“Did you have fun though Ed? Really?” Steve asked, genuine concern threading through his tone as he addressed his friend who managed an affirming nod in response. 
“Loads. We’ll all go out again soon, but I’ve gotta give you back to your sweetheart before she gets too jealous.” 
Steve’s nod was so serious as he processed the words, entirely missing the small look of amusement shared between you and Eddie as you pulled yourselves from the establishment. 
“Yeah.” He agreed, his head lulling sideways to rest on the crown of your own. “She needs me.” 
It had sounded like a joke when he said it, but even you could sense the small severity behind the words, almost reassuring himself of the truth behind them. Of course you needed him. 
“Yeah, she does.” You confirmed, kissing at his shoulder clumsily as you tried to focus on your steps, narrowly avoiding toppling the three of you right over uneven pavements underfoot. “I always need you, honey.” 
You did not need to look at Steve to know that he was smiling — you felt it as you held him, felt it in his touch and the heat of his body carefully wrapped around yours. At least this night felt like a success in your eyes. Steve was happy, and you had done your part to make him so. He’d be awfully hungover tomorrow morning, but he’d be happy, and that was all that seemed to matter to you in the moment. 
Eddie managed to hold Steve upright while you fiddled with the lock of your car door, the boy now contently distracted with regaling tales of the night to the man who had witnessed them first hand. Getting him into the car was easy enough, tucking him cautiously into the front seat, your body leaning over him to click his seatbelt into place, his hand lifting to rub at your lower back in thanks. 
“You’re the best, y’know, baby? The real best. The best best.” 
You paused to smile at him, head shaking in amusement before brushing your lips against his cheek, relishing in the way his hand gripped excitedly at you for the briefest of moments. “I could say the same about you, y’know.” 
“Nuh uh.” 
A groan sounded from outside the car, drawn out and exasperated beyond compare. “Jesus H Christ, I’m begging for someone to take me home. It’s so fucking late, guys.” 
You pulled back with a laugh to witness Eddie’s petulance, your hand coming out to gesture to the back seat. “Then get in the car, dingus, and I’ll take you home.”
“Yeah, what she said!” Steve slurred from the front seat, the battle against his weariness now long lost, eyes closed and head resting heavily against its back, unable to hold itself up any longer. 
Eddie clambered into the back with a half assed eye roll, splaying out across the work back seat until he, too, was one with the upholstery. “You guys aren’t gonna be gross and sayin’ i love you’s all the way home, are you?” 
Steve’s eyes widened in horror. “Oh shit, I haven’t said I love you yet!” 
The charming little frown that spread across his face was enough to melt you in your entirety, your hand reaching out to brush his check with affection, his nose nuzzling sweetly into the cup of your palm. “I’m not worried about it; I know you do.” 
“Yeah, but I do love you. I was thinkin’ it the whole time, thinkin’ you’re so pretty n’ all. So pretty that I couldn't remember to say it.” 
Eddie just huffed again in the back seat, his complaints overtly ignored despite the growing expletives.
“I love you too, Stevie. How about we get Eds home and get you some water, then we can be as sweet as we wanna be.” 
Steve’s lips pressed into your palm, his kiss unhurried and uncoordinated as the alcohol hindered his usual grace, a mumbled m’kay tickling your skin as he spoke. 
You looked up into the rearview mirror, dropping your hand to Steve’s knee for the boy to hold, keeping his neediness satiated for the time being as he grasped it between his own eagerly. “You hear that, Eds? You’re in the clear. Let’s get you boys home.” 
A grumbled thank god and the creaks of the backseat window being clumsily wound down was enough incentive to start your travels, a pleased smile gracing your lips to know that Steve had been given exactly the night he deserved after all. 
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incognit0slut · 8 months
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Pretty when you sleep
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As newlyweds, Spencer couldn’t keep his hands off of you. Even when you were asleep.
warnings: (MINORS DNI!) fem reader, consensual somnophilia, unprotected sex, very minimum plot yet very heavy smut. words: around 2k
a/n: In another episode of me getting inspired by a clip that I turned into a gif and wrote something out of it🥴 if you want to read my other attempts at writing a blurb based on gifs, find the hashtag #gifwriting on my page. Also, I can't believe this is my first fic of him as a husband.
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YOU WERE TOO PRETTY TO RESIST. You just looked so goddamn tempting while laying on your stomach like that. It didn’t help when the strap of your nightgown fell from your shoulder, uncovering the swell of your breast.
You were so breathtakingly beautiful. So soft. So irresistible.
Spencer always made sure he had your consent every time he touched you. He grew to understand what you liked and didn't like when it came to sex, and sure, maybe thinking of brushing his fingers along your skin while you were unconscious wasn't the best idea. But he couldn't help it. You were just too inviting to resist, so he placed a hand on your hip.
You stirred at the sudden contact he initiated and unconsciously readjust into a more comfortable position, your toes curling before relaxing once more. When you finally stopped squirming around, he reached out again, letting his rough fingers travel up your exposed leg. He started at your knee before going further up between the apex of your plush thighs, where that sweet little cunt of yours was waiting for him.
You were still asleep, even as he started to carefully stroke you, dragging a single knuckle up and down against your thin panties and suppressed a groan as he felt the heat radiating from underneath the material. Your breathing pattern began to change as he continued with his teasing. By the time he circled your clit and added the slightest amount of pressure on it, you started to pant and push your ass higher into the air in response.
He smiled. You wanted this.
Of course, you did. The way your body reacted to his touch spoke for itself. You were already getting so wet that your panties were turning damp and sticky with arousal. He continued to massage your clit through the thin cotton, and he watched in awe as your breath hitched in your throat, almost as though you could feel his actions even when you were unconscious.
Spencer kept his eyes trained on your body as he moved to dip your panties down your legs, carefully lifting your body up just enough to slide them down your curves, allowing them to sit around one of your ankles. Then he carefully slipped off his own clothes, trying to keep as quiet as possible, before his palms splayed against your body to move you onto your back.
“So pretty," he mumbled under his breath as he took note of your loose nightgown and the way it had risen up, exposing more of your skin to his prying eyes. He moved over the mattress slowly, making sure you were still fast asleep, and slipped between your now parted legs.
God, how had he become so lucky? Having you reciprocate his feelings was already a surprise when he confessed, but it surpassed his expectations when you agreed to be his girlfriend. Ten months of pure bliss was what he felt throughout your relationship, and when he noticed some of your clutter in his apartment, he wanted to see it every time he came home.
And now, miraculously, you were his wife. The word carried a weight of joy and wonder that he couldn't quite fathom. Every morning waking up to your shared life, and every night falling asleep next to you, felt like a dream too good to be true. 
Granted, you've shared intimate nights so much that he should've gotten used to your body by now. Yet, every touch felt as electrifying and exhilarating as the first time and he found himself still captivated by the warmth of your presence. Even now as he fisted his cock, giving himself a teasing tug as he ran his thumb against the tip, his eyes raking your exposed body.
The way your legs parted for him, showing off your wetness and how already swollen you were even when he was barely touching you. His gaze swept over your exposed breast that slipped out of your nightgown and he brushed a thumb against one of your stiff peaks, feeling the way you trembled beneath him.
The way you shuddered made him jerk his hips against yours erratically, pushing his cock against your mound. Your body reacted to his touch, even in slumber, as your hips arched off the bed. His breath hitched when he rutted his hips forward. The sight of his cock against your abdomen showed him just how deep he would be inside you.
He then eased his hips back to drag the thick, swollen tip through your outer lips. His eyes focused on the way your pussy spread for him, as though inviting him inside. Your arousal coated his swollen head as he focused his attention on your clit, pressing down on it with his cock as he listened to the increased pace of your breathing.
He moved his cock back up as he let the underside split your folds open, resting his girth between them snugly as he let out a low groan at the heat radiating from your core. You were so fucking pretty it was unreal.
“You’re so wet,” he murmured, holding onto the base of his cock as he started to drag the tip through your wetness again, grunting softly as it caught against your tight entrance. “Look at you swallowing me.”
Spencer exercised restraint as he gave soft, subtle thrusts into your aching cunt. His gaze flickered between your face and his cock splitting you apart as he continued pushing himself forward, feeling your body begin to resist his entrance as he tried to change the angle.
"I'm sorry, Angel," he whispered. His chest rumbled with a groan as he felt you clenching around his thickness, causing his eyes to snap up to your face in surprise, thinking that he’d wake you up. But you were still very much asleep. "I can't resist you."
He let out a sigh as he managed to thrust his hips further. He paused for a second to cherish the feeling of his cock being completely buried deep inside you, running his hand over your abdomen as he tried to feel himself inside you, pressing against your pelvis as he throbbed at the sensation.
He held your hips and slowly dragged his thick cock from your cunt, leaving the tip to keep you stretched out before plunging back inside. The restraint he once had now long gone with the way your body hungrily sucked him. His pace increased as he leaned forward, hovering his body over yours with his hands splayed on either side of your head. He sucked in a breath at the way your body adjusted to him, clenching around his cock as he kept rutting his hips.
And then you suddenly stirred. You moved slightly, your chin tilting upward, and your lips parting to release a breath. Your eyes slowly flutter open from your slumber as you feel the warmth of his body, the subtle shift of his weight, and the aching sensation between your thighs.
"What..." Your voice cracked as you turned to see him, only to let out a low groan at him thrusting a bit harder against you.
"Shh, it's just me," he whispered. The haze of your sleep lifted, and your gaze met him at the same time he leaned down, pressing his lips onto yours. 
He captured your lips in a slow, passionate kiss. His tongue swiped over your bottom lip as your hands pressed to his chest, feeling his flushed, hot body against your own. You let him devour you while his hips increased in speed, rolling against yours as whimpers began to spill from your lips. Your thighs instinctively tightened around him, curses spilling beneath a heavy breath as the bliss filled your body.
"Spence..." you whimpered. You were breathless, eyes screwed shut, legs now parting even further to give him better access. Throughout the time you were in a relationship with him, you never imagined being woken up like this, but you weren't complaining. Not when you could feel his cock stretching you so deliciously.
Spencer was often embarrassed when it came to dirty talk, but once he realized how much you relished those whispered, filthy words, it became a personal mission to keep you thoroughly satisfied. Knowing how much you loved hearing those filthy words became a secret thrill for him, which was why when he leaned closer to whisper in your ear, you became a whining mess.
“You're always so tight,” he began, his voice deep and raspy, right in your ear before he nipped at the lobe, sending a gasp spilling for your lips as you reached for him in an overwhelming burst of arousal. “Look at you taking me so well. It's like your pussy is made for me.”
A rush of burning heat filled your body, his words affecting you with heat spreading from between your thighs to reach even your toes and fingertips. He buried himself between your neck while thrusting inside of you with rising desperation, pushing himself further, his body rolling against yours.
“Faster,” you begged him in a breathless whimper, all before your teeth sank into your lip, brow wrinkling, moans filling in your chest. It only took him a second to comply. The thrusts of his hips created a loud smack as drove his cock deeper inside of you. You couldn’t help but cry out, overwhelmed by the pleasure, squeezing yourself so tight around him that he let out a grunt.
“God, you feel amazing,” he groaned in your ear, having the proximately to tell you the dirty, nasty things on his mind. His lips brushed over your neck as he increased his pace. “I love fucking you like this.”
“Please… don’t stop—” You gulped with a brief pause. “Feels so... so good.”
He shook his head against your shoulder.
"I'm not stopping," he continued to whisper in his gruff voice, earning goosebumps on your quivering body. “I love feeling you this close.” He pressed an open kiss on your skin. "I love making you desperate."
“Fuck,” you cried out, body weakening with his every word. The sounds of him pumping into your slick, wet arousal became louder the quicker he thrust into you. “I-I’m getting c-close."
You continued to warble out broken sentences, trying to form any coherent thoughts but all you felt was the searing pleasure that flowed through you. The lewd sounds continued to fill the room as your essence dribbled down your ass and onto the bed, staining the sheets. "I-I'm gonna—"
“Come for me,” he encouraged, lips pressing to your skin between words. “Go on, come on my cock.” The choice words sent a shiver down your spine as the heat bubbled between your thighs. 
“I'm coming,” you cried out, voice straining and struggling to speak from him leaving you so breathless. Your body tensed as the pleasure swelled through your body and his final confession toppled you right over the edge.
“I love this so much,” he groaned between you gasping as the first wave of pleasure surged through you, “I love you.”
You finally let go, toes curling in ecstasy as you arched your back, legs growing further apart. Your head spins from the warmth filling every inch of you as he fucked you through your orgasm. You gasped his name, overwhelmed with the bliss he offered, the emotions that drove you at his words. You wanted to say them back, but you couldn't even think properly as the wave of pleasure washed over you.
He continued to thrust, eyes closed, brow creased, lips parted, huffing and groaning and holding you tighter until he reached his own peak. The moment a heavy exhale left his lips, his hips slowed and his cock twitched, signaling the pleasure filling him as he released inside of you. You moaned at the sensation before he eased himself and collapsed on the bed, bringing you along with him as you settled on top of his body.
The two of you lingered in the aftermath of passion for a few seconds too long—breathless, hot, sweaty, and tired. When you lifted your head to look at him, you noticed the softness in his eyes, your heart fluttering at the sight. 
"Well, good morning to you, Dr. Reid," you teased.
He laughed, his hands absentmindedly stroking your back. There was a warmth in his gaze, filled with affection as you continued to stare at him. "Good morning, Mrs. Reid."
You couldn't help but smile at the endearment as you placed your head on his chest, finding solace in the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. With a contented sigh, you let his warmth envelop you, singking further into the arms of your husband.
a/n: If you have a specific clip you want me to be inspired by, come and drop me a message. But please be specific so I would know which scene you're talking about.
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heegyukeluv · 1 month
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... and a bit more (sjy)
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EXTRA FOR "A HUNDRED SUNSETS" (read it here)
pairing: jake x afab!reader
synopsis: It's been years since you and Jake started dating, now dealing with adult life, which became an easy thing as you both shared it together, full of love and support. Yet, years in a relationship can make you wonder if your loved one still sees you with the same intensity. So you decided to reassure Jake that no matter how many years you stay with him, your love and desire will remain as passionate as ever.
my's note: i’m so obsessed with these characters AND SO ARE YALL WTFFF!! I’M THRILLED WITH ALL THE SUPPORT I’VE RECEIVED FOR THIS WORK i did NOT expect this to get this many likes and reblogs and comments and stuff 😭😭😭😭 sooooo here’s a lil gift as a THANK YOU!!! thank y’all for every word of appreciation towards my writing and my work. i really meant it!!! hope you enjoy this one as much as “a hundred sunsets” 💖
warnings: established relationship (does this count as a warning?), jake is a bit insecure in this one, teacher jake (as a job!! he’s not y/n’s teacher), pet names (it’s them. how could they not.), smut w plot! (MINORS DO NOT INTERACT) - oral sex (f. receiving), slight choking (j does to y/n CONSENSUAL. SHE ASKED. and please for god’s sake don’t do it if you don’t know how to do it properly), reader kinda suffocates jake (but he likes that lol), j. cums inside, unprotected sex (don’t do it !!), car sex (oral only!! f. receiving). lmk if i missed something!!
wc: 7.5k
NOT PROOFREAD. 
taglist 💖: @yvnempire
Jake’s head was aching with the amount of highschoolers he was dealing with everyday.
Choosing that career path was a childhood dream come true; to be able to teach other people about what he loves the most – after you, of course – brought so much joy to his life, he was constantly on cloud nine. Having you by his side to celebrate every little achievement with him played a big part in that as well.
However, as with every other job, there were some days he wished to erase from his memory in order to forget not only how stressful it was, but how annoying some teenagers can be. 
Jake knew he didn’t had to worry about your feelings for him in any way.
You showered him with love and affection in every single action of yours and that was pretty much enough. You would pack him lunch with cute little love notes, you would stay with him until late while he read his articles and prepared his classes, you would pick him up every now and then to get him to a date – even after years, you both still loved watching the sunset together, whispering love promises until nightfall, only to continuing saying them under the moonlight. 
Your big smile and shining eyes greeting him whenever he got home acted like words unspoken, but just in case you made sure to say them constantly.
But sometimes there are things that some teenagers say that can really hurt your ego and hit you directly in your insecurities if you let them in. And the words he heard that day echoed through his mind the whole afternoon. 
You were working on some work papers in the living room when you heard the front door unlocking. Quickly you stood up to greet Jake with a hug.
You never understood how you always managed to miss Jake even now, after you both started to live together, but at some point you just gave up trying to figure it out, accepting your fate of never getting enough of your amazing boyfriend. 
“Oh, hey there, professor,” you welcomed him with a sweet smile, already cupping his face with your hands and placing a tender kiss on your favorite lips, the same plump, red and soft ones you always loved to feel on yours.
“Hey, babe.”
You tilted your head, confused. Although Jake reciprocated your kiss, the mood wasn’t right. 
You never expected Jake to be bright and cheerful all the time, never, especially when coming home from such stressful work. Alongside that, his intense studying sessions in order to get better at his job and eventually become a university teacher helped him to get overwhelmed from time to time, so you respected the moments he vented out about his burdens, listening with all your heart and asking him if he wanted some advice or just to be heart.
Most times he just asked for a warm hug and a kiss, and of course, you under no circumstances would deny such a heartwarming request.
You knew it was the minimum, but you appreciated how Jake never discounted his stress on you. Actually he would be always saying you were his stress reliever, so you really weirded out with his actions today. 
Not only was his demeanor quite off, kindly pulling you away without deepening the kiss to leave his bag and coat beside the door, but his face expressed something you read as concern and sadness.
You watched Jake walking quietly to your room without explaining a thing, so you followed him right away, heart hurting in worry. 
“What’s with the frown, my love?” You asked softly when you both arrived at the room almost at the same time, you behind Jake, who was now starting to get undressed. 
He said nothing as he took off his glasses to put on the nightstand and unbelted his dark blue trousers, sitting on the bed to unbutton the first buttons of his white dress shirt, not fully finishing any of his actions like he was in some internal dilemma preventing him from working properly.
Your concerned gaze followed his every move until you finally heard his voice. “Do you love me?”
Now was your time to frown as you approached him. “What’s this question, Jakey? Of course I love you,” you sat beside him and your hand almost instantly grabbed his to gently squeeze it, playing with his fingers.
He was glancing at a random spot on the floor while you tried to read his face. 
“No, but like, do you still think I’m attractive? Do you really feel desire for me or do you fake it?”
You could see he was a bit embarrassed for asking that so you, again, reassured him with your words and actions. “I’m really confused right now, my love. Of course I do feel desire for you, you’re the hottest man I’ve ever met. And yeah, you are attractive as fuck, Jakey,” you lifted his chin with your fingers to face you. “What’s with all that? Tell me what happened, mhm?”
Jake locked his eyes on you for a second, already feeling a bit better meeting his favorite two orbs looking at him with so much love, warmth and reassurance. However, although he appreciated every genuine feeling from you, he wasn’t asking you for any of that at the moment.
He needed to know if you still saw him as an attractive guy,  so he averted his gaze as he started to spill what was on his mind all day. 
“Some random kid told me that you’d easily leave me for a hot guy if I don’t treat you right, and I don’t normally care about what some of them say because y’know, teenagers and their full of nonsense minds, but–” He sighed, pain starting to drip all through his words. “I– I know that you love me, and I love you too. But what if– What if I don’t pleasure you enough?” His eyes searched for yours again, eyes a bit red like he was about to cry. “What if you realize you can find some other person that can fulfill your fantasies and desires in a way I can’t?”
Jake let everything out all at once, every corrosive thinking that dwelled him throughout the day, knowing he was in a safe space, that you were his safe place. You got a bit surprised with the sudden rant, but listened with care and attention to know what to do whenever he stopped, but your head was already spinning with all the information he was giving you. 
How could he think that? Jake was an incredible boyfriend, in a way that you worried to give him love enough to keep him close, because the thought of Jake leaving you frightened you too much.
You always felt like no action or words of yours could show him how much you loved and needed him around. To imagine he thinks a similar thing made your heart pound in pain.
“You’re hot and young and beautiful and so easy to love. Everytime I ask myself how I managed to bag a goddess like you. I can’t bear the idea of losing you, Y/N–”
You had to shut him up with a kiss, and then another, and another, until you felt him relaxing under your touch. You moved your body to sit on his lap, his hands looking for comfort on your hips right away. “You will never lose me, Jake,” you whispered, his warm breath brushing against your skin as you admired each feature of his pretty face. “I love you. I want you. Only you,” you pecked his lips again before continuing to speak with a small smile, your hands resting on his shoulders. “You’re everything I've ever wanted, you’re everything I need, my love,” and one more sweet kiss. “Don’t ever doubt that, okay?”
And then you finally kissed him properly, sighing when you felt his tongue searching for yours, touching you so intimately, so passionately, so full of love. Your hips were moving in little circles on his lap, already feeling yourself getting wet and his dick getting hard. 
You thought about sharing your own insecurities keeping the same theme, but that was Jake’s moment of being loved, and you were willing to let him know in every breath, touch, kiss, word of yours how much you cherished him, how much you adored his presence, how much you treasured every single moment with him, and of course, how aroused Jake could make you feel just by being close.
You never spoke directly to him about that, but Jake was magnetic. Your eyes always searched for him, observing how his movements seemed meticulously calculated to leave you wanting more, all the time making you lose your mind doing the simplest things.
Seeing him walking around the house wearing nothing but loose gray sweatpants that showed the hem of his boxers with his study glasses and messy hair always made you squeeze your thighs together and swallow hard on your seat.
Same thing whenever he got ready for work in the morning, getting all dressed up in his dress shirt with coats/blazers or just a casual long-sleeve shirt, never forgetting his black specs – everytime you had to hold yourself from tossing him back in the bed to ride his face with that fucking glasses. 
Or when he was focused on his studies, deep in thought with furrowed brows and lips pursed a bit, from time to time biting his tongue, making you worder how hard he could fuck you while looking at you like that.
And not to mention whenever you were in the car with Jake being the driver, his hands gripping on the wheel and his veiny arms popping out looking so unnecessary hot, to the point you almost had to ask him to pull over to fuck you deep with his slender pretty fingers.
You were so sure that your craving eyes shamelessly undressing him was noticeable, but now you got to know that maybe you should start to show off how he affected you more often in order to make Jake understand that his breathing near your ears alone could make you go wild.
You bit his bottom lip and pulled away while grabbing one of his hands from your back to lead it down to the hem of your shorts. “Feel that, Jakey?” You asked after forcing his hands to touch your clothed cunt, smirking. “Can you feel how wet I am just by kissing you, pretty boy?” Jake nodded dumbly while open-mouthed moaning on your lips just by feeling your already dampened panties, hooded eyes looking at you with nothing but passion and lust, his own dick growing hard in his pants. “That’s how much you affect me, my love.”
The whole atmosphere had switched and none of you complained, because the main reason for Jake's down feeling was the idea of losing you due him being unable to satisfy you, which you decided right away to tell and show him he was doing way more than you expected, and always so right.
Jake always surpassed your expectations. You were so fucking lucky.
“Let me love you, okay?” You quickly locked your lips one more time, addicted to his taste, before pushing him down to lay on his back on the sheets, hands leaving your warm, clothed pussy, to hold you still on top of him. “Let me show you how good you make me feel and how much I want you,” and your mouth searched for him again as if it never felt enough. 
Every touch of your sensitive area on his bulge was making both of you groan between the messy kiss you were sharing, the taste of his tongue on yours working as a drug, making you wonder if you could stay like that forever.
Unwilling you parted away again, getting out of the bed to start to undress yourself as a little show for Jake. That night fate designed you to choose to wear his favorite black set of lingerie, so he was watching you with hungry eyes, devouring each curve of your body with his eyes, like you were his favorite meal – and just to add, he would watch you the same way even if you were wearing torn clothes. Jake was so in love and obsessed with you, anything about you made him feel insane.
You gave him a smirk before removing your panties and climbing on him again, loving the way his eyes were glazed on your chest, the bra of the lingerie set making it squished together and too pretty for him to handle. He bit his own lip as if he was holding himself, breath growing heavy, the dim light of your shared bedroom making it look even hotter, with his messy hair, glistening, red, swollen lips and eyes full of adoration and desire for you. Only for you. 
“I need to eat you out,” he uttered in a hurry, almost sounding drunk when his hands touched your bare hips, caressing your warm skin and making you shiver. You smiled cheekily.
“Of course you do, pretty boy,” you planted a tender kiss on his nose, both of his cheeks, his chin and on his forehead, “That’s why I’ll be sitting on your pretty face right now,” and then a final kiss on his lips as you watched his eyes sparkle in joy and enthusiasm in anticipation, you couldn't hold a little laugh. 
Jake had a not so little oral fixation, always finding a way of placing his lips on you, nibbing or sucking any part of your skin he was able to, your pussy being his favorite. And who were you to deny such things? You always let him use your body for his own satisfaction, because you knew how hard he could get just by the thought alone of eating you out, and there were many times he came untouched while doing it. 
It was a win-win situation, with you hitting your best orgasms every single time, making your pretty noises just for him, dripping all over his tongue.
Jake’s heart fluttered with the view of you getting on your knees, hovering yourself while touching your dampened folds with your own fingers just to place your cunt directly on his mouth. He was in heaven, eyes instantly closing as he exhaled your scent, getting drunker and drunker on you.
You sat slowly on him, a little afraid of suffocating your cute boyfriend who now had his arms hugging your legs, pushing you down without a care in the world, like suffocating himself on you was everything he ever wanted. 
Jake always began with a big, long lick, collecting all you arousal just to feel your taste and mix it with his own saliva, drawing out a moan from you, before starting to suck you with passion, almost like he was slowly making out with your pussy, the tip of his nose constantly rubbing your sensitive clit as he went faster, the ragged breath tickling your skin while he was focused on you. 
Your hand searched for support on the headboard, the other unconsciously grabbing Jake’s hair just like you knew he loved, giving it a little pull once and while to show him how much pleasure he was giving you. 
“You always make me feel so, so good, Jakey,” you said with a gasp, your body reacting out of lust, hips rolling back and forth trying to match Jake’s rhythm. 
The whole visual underneath you showed a forbidden scene that only helped your arousal to increase; Jake’s sweaty hair was getting stuck on his forehead, eyes closed and arms holding you closer with his veiny hands squeezing your thighs, pushing you even more into his face. “And you look so fucking hot right now, Jaeyun. Shit.”
You threw your head back and rolled your eyes when he started to intercalate his movements to tongue-fucking you, lewd wet sounds now filling up the room. “Your mouth does wonders on me, you know that?” Your breath was heavy, your whole body on fire, the only thing coming across in your mind right now was to cum all over his face. 
You wanted to make sure Jake understood how fantastic of a job he was doing, like ever, and how much you loved the way he guided you through your pleasure, giving you everything you needed. “You always eat me so good, my pretty boy–” You interrupted yourself with a loud whimper when he focused on your clit, sucking, flicking his tongue on it. “I’m close, Jaeyun– fuck. I’m really close,” you could feel your orgasm building up on your core, Jake also noticed how your body was reacting by you avidly riding on his face, legs tensioning a bit, you already caring less about suffocating him or whatever – he always told you to go hard on him, and loved every time you did.
Jake was so in heaven.
He himself started to moan on your cunt, intensifying his attention on your clit, his mumbles vibrating in your sensitive area.
“You’re my precious boy, isn’t that right?” You said with your voice weak and heard a little muffed ‘mhm’ as a response. “So make me cum, yeah, Jakey?” 
To get you off was always Jake’s own pleasure, especially when he was using his mouth to do so. God, Jake loved to hear your pretty sounds, how you would moan his name so pleasing, your body trembling by pure lust, you losing yourself when you were close to your climax, overwhelmed by all his stimulus. 
So Jake focused even more to make you to cum. At this point you were a whimpering mess, rushing over to achieve your orgasm so desperately that small tears started to form in the corner of your eyes and your hands tightened on Jake’s hair when you finally did, spilling your juices all over his mouth.
Jake maintained his tongue working on you, passionately collecting all of you, groaning with delight as he felt your taste melting on his tongue.
You tried to catch your breath for a bit before removing yourself from Jake’s face, hissing when you felt your thighs burning due your own work and the position you stood for so long. You flopped on the bed besides Jake to recover yourself, listening to him gasping for air as well, but with a satisfied grin adorning his glistened, attractive lips.
“You are insane,” you whispered, smiling before propping yourself on your elbow to give him a sweet kiss, opposite to all the sexual atmosphere that drifted around the room minutes ago, your hands searching for comfort on his neck, deepening the touch.
“Yes, for you,” Jake replied between the kiss, shifting a bit to be on his side so he could give you proper access to his mouth, and also to rub his fingers on the bare skin of your waist, pulling you closer. When he did that, you felt his hard bulge brushing against you and startled, parting away from him to give a questioning expression.
“Jaeyun,” you touched his still clothed and neglected cock.
“Ah–” 
“Why didn’t you stop to at least remove your clothes?” You asked genuinely worried, already moving yourself to do what you just said. “This must be hurting so bad, my love,” you watched how his dick jumped out of his boxers when you took it off.
“It is…” He whispered, face contorted in pleasure and relief when your warm, soft hands started to pump his shaft. “But you’re always my priority, sugar,” he said with a smirk, looking down to watch you for a second.
You loved how Jake managed to make you smile and your heart flutter in moments like those, constantly ensuring that you felt loved before anything else.
You collected the precum leaking out of his tip with your fingers, to ease your movements as you accelerated a bit. Due to his sensitivity, he almost instantly opened his mouth with a loud moan and started to buck his hips into your touch, wanting more of it while whispering “P–Please...”
You kept giving the attention he needed, cupping his tip with your hand to move it in circles. Jake whimpered, voice cracking a little ‘fuck’. He was melting under your touch, so sensitive, his body slightly squirming beneath you, needing more of you.
Although you were enjoying the view and how reactive he was just by your hand alone, you wanted more of him, so you voiced it out in a serious tone “I really need you to fuck me,” as you moved away, leaving him missing your warmth around his dick so you could lay on your back on the bed.
Jake immediately understood the assignment, positioning himself over you, his necklace dangling near your face. You smirked as you pulled him closer so your mouth could meet his, but he broke the contact before you could do so.
“Let me just get rid of this shirt bef–”
“No!” You rushed to say, grabbing his arms to interrupt his attempt of removing his dress shirt, “Don’t, please,” you said quietly, feeling your cheeks burning by the shyness that hit on you, averting his curious gaze.
“Hm?” Jake lifted an eyebrow, puppy eyes trying to understand why you were reticent all of a sudden.
He decided to not undress himself fully as you asked to do so without questioning it much, leaning to kiss your neck, his soft lips already knowing every sweet spot of yours. His goal was to make you relaxed, reassuring you that whatever you said he would respect and listen with all the love he had for you.
“I have this fantasy…” You started to speak after a while, enjoying his light, still hot touches, now you being the one melting for him. 
“Yeah?” He whispered, keeping sucking, biting and kissing your neck, jawline and collarbone area, shivers spreading all over your body. He was thrilled with the idea of you sharing more from that side of yours, knowing damn well how hard to say it out loud was for you. Jake would always give you all the time in the world, though. 
You took advantage of his face being buried on your neck to keep talking with a slight lack of confidence. You were afraid of how Jake would react. “I–I always wanted you to– To fuck me wearing a dress shirt,” you stuttered a bit, but finally voiced out what have been on the back of your mind for a while, gulping nervously while your hands tried to find comfort on his hair, playing with it as a habit of tension.
You heard a little chuckle from Jake, which made you worry that he might find you a bit pathetic. 
But it was Jake, after all. The one that managed to surprise – and most important, to respect – you every single time. “You’re so cute,” wasn’t what you expected to hear. Jake pulled away, gently holding your chin for you to face him. “Does my gorgeous girlfriend get turned on by me wearing a dress shirt?” The sultry tone and the charming grin decorating his lips made you blushing even harder, not to mention the fluttering excitement in your stomach. “Did I get it right, sugar?”
You saw Jake shirtless countless times, yet the view right now of his chest showing just enough because the first buttons being undone alongside his dangling silver necklace was driving you insane, breath growing heavy as you licked your lips, not saying anything.
Every reaction of you being catched by Jake’s sharp gaze. “I need your words, my love,” he whispered, teasingly brushing his lips on yours.
“Yes, Jakey,” you whispered back, trying to push your embarrassment away. “You look so hot on it.”
“There you go,” he smiled proudly at you, but also confident by your compliment.
He finally kissed you properly, sucking your bottom lip and then immediately deepening the touch by adding his tongue, messily kissing you just how you wanted. 
One of his hands slowly found its way down your body, fingers brushing your folds before inserting two digits without a warning; due to your wetness he had no trouble in doing so. Your moan got lost into his mouth, your own fingers messing his hair even more, nails scratching his nape and scalp. 
Jake’s lips traveled down to your neck while his hand continued its job on your entrance, in and out in a slow, painful pace. He kept going down with his kisses, stopping on your still clothed boobs.
“Can I remove these?” He asked, pointing to your bra and you nodded, breathing heavy as you helped him to undress you fully, missing his fingers inside you.
Jake would constantly ask permission before removing any piece of your clothes, and in particular, your bra. You once told him how much more comfortable you felt wearing a bra during sex, especially if you were riding him. At the same time, you were totally aware of his love for your whole body, so alongside that, you gave him the consentment to remove the piece whenever he felt like it. And every time he questioned if he could.
Jake straightened his back for a second just to appreciate your beauty.
He questioned how he got so lucky to have you like that, all naked just for him to touch, gorgeous body just for him to glorify, your face, in a perfect blend of love and lust, just for him to see. Everything. Just for him. How?
“Only you can have me like this, Jakey,” you spoke softly with an equally gentle smile, like you were reading his mind tripping over insecurities again – although you felt a bit shy under his intense gaze. “You’re the only one I love.”
He sighed. A lovesick type of sigh, the one he let out whenever he realized – once more – how much in love he was with you, the one that always came with a cute smile, the one with a devoted gaze.
Then he leaned down again, giving you a quick kiss before continuing his work, focusing his mouth now on your tits, gently swirling his tongue on your hardened nipples while sucking on it. You gasped, hands rushing to tangle your fingers on his silky hair. He gave the proper attention to both of your boobs, making you even more wet, before moving down to kiss the interior of your thighs. 
“Please, Jaeyun– I wanna feel you inside of me, please.” You pleaded, already feeling impatient.
You heard him let out a soft laugh before trailing his lips all over your body, up to your lips, whispering with a sweet, yet alluring tone. “Your wish is my command, princess,” and he aligned his cock on your entrance, slowly entering you. He gave you little kisses all over your face, capturing all your expressions of pleasure and then said “I love you.”
Your lips curved with the tender, sudden confession, moaning when you felt him finally moving, your hooded eyes looking for Jake’s to whisper “I love you too, my love..”
And you also loved how Jake filled you up so good, so deep inside you, thrusting his hips in the pace he already knew both of you enjoyed.
Normally Jake would be willing to let you take control all over him, especially if you were using him to reach your own high – riding his face or his cock, coming all over his body, making a total mess. He loved that. But from time to time you would silently ask for him to take over, laying down on the bed and letting him be the one in charge of using your body. And he had to admit that he also loved that. 
To watch your eyes rolling whenever he hit your g-spot, the little frown of delight mixed with your mouth open, chanting his name in between moans in such an endearing, alluring way without even realizing it, fully surrendered. He could cum just by watching it.
The room quickly was filled with groans and moans from you two, Jake intertwined your fingers together and lifted both your hands above your head, holding himself steady as he kept thrusting harder and faster into you, wet sounds mixing with your names being whispered by each other’s mouth, lost in pure ecstasy. 
“Choke me,” you whined at some point, wanting more and more of that addicting feeling. “P-Please, choke me, Jakey,” you managed to move one of your hands still interlocked with his, positioning it on your neck, letting it go for him to do what you asked for, his movements slowing down a bit as he was trying to fully understand your request. 
Jake’s eyes gleamed with a bit of shock and excitement. Wasn’t your first time asking him to choke you, but everytime he got somewhat surprised. He placed his hands around your neck, gently squeezing the spot he learned from you that is the right one. Jake was always very cautious with the act, observing your reactions and never taking more than a few seconds, doing just enough for you to feel the pleasure you wanted to. And you so did. 
Your mouth fell open with a loud, choked moan when your air got stuck in your throat. The view of him with his white dress shirt holding you like that made your mind go dizzy for a brief moment. You gasped for air as soon as Jake released the tightness on your neck, feeling him kissing you right after but you couldn’t kiss him back, your orgasm near the edge already making you too messy and out of your mind, so he went down to bite and kiss your neck.
Jake’s hot breath on your skin, he sounding so gorgeous, lascivious groaning your name, together with all the overwhelmness your body was going through and his dick deep into your pussy the way you loved, was enough for your second orgasm to hit.
Without a proper warning you screamed Jake’s name while your walls clenched around his cock, he himself moaning with your tight cunt making it difficult to move. Your hand squeezed his when you hit your climax, and it took just a few more pumps until you felt Jake’s warm liquid filling you up along a groan. You hissed.
Jake fell on your body, panting hard and burying his face on your neck. You chuckled when your mind got back to yourself, remembering what all of that was about. “Does this answer your questions?” You asked, out of breath. 
“What?” Jake whispered, lips tickling your skin when he did so.
“That I’m not leaving you anytime soon.”
Jake hummed against your skin, now understanding what you meant. You felt him smiling right after. 
“I think I need a few more reminders, just in case.”
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So on a random morning, while staying loyal to your job of making Jake fully aware of your deep need for him and how profoundly he affected you, you watched him getting ready for work with you still on the bed. 
You two always woke up almost together, while Jake took a shower and brushed his teeth, you made breakfast and prepared his lunchbox together with a cute note – it wasn’t an everyday routine since some days Jake had lunch with you at home or on a little date.
After eating, you would go watch and help him with his clothes whenever he needed it. You loved to watch him like he was your favorite show, especially because your day started a bit later than that so that was kind of the quality time you two shared every morning. 
But today the show was a bit… different.
Jake looked like a lost puppy, shirtless in front of his wardrobe trying to figure out something to wear, barely noticing you hungrily eyeing him up and down not caring much about his whole dilemma. 
He turned to you to ask. “This one or this one? What do you prefer?” 
You quickly eyed the options and pointed to the red and white striped long sleeve – one of your favorites, so it was your honest opinion, actually.
However you had other ideas running through your mind, so you went closer to him, hugging his warm body from behind before he wore the shirt. “But you look better without any of them, y’know that?” You glanced at him from the mirror in front of you both, your hands caressing his toned chest faking an innocence. Jake’s eyes caught yours showing your clearly second intentions, shifting to a darkened atmosphere right away. 
“You think so? Should I go shirtless then?” He asked playfully with a smirk. You giggled mischievously, turning him over so you two could face each other, your hands on his waist while he cupped your face.
“You’d definitely turn some heads,” you teased, leaning in closer, voice turning into a low whisper. “But I’d rather keep the view all to myself,” and with that your lips met his to share a passionate kiss, your small giggles and smiles getting lost in between.
Jake’s body pushed you to start walking backwards while his hands moved your head to the side to deepen the touch. You stumbled your legs on the bed, falling over it without breaking the contact, Jake hovering you as you felt his bulge hardening against your thigh. 
He broke the kiss to pick his phone from the nightstand, tilting his head. “We have about fifteen minutes,” and glanced back at you with a smirk, diving into you once again.
“More than enough,” you murmured, shivering with the feeling of the tip of his nose and lips brushing against your neck, giving little kisses on there, your panties dampening just by that. 
You sighed, letting out a quietly whimper as Jake’s lips gently sucked a sensitive part of your skin. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer for you both to kiss. You tried to undress him quickly, removing his sweatpants and boxers in one go with his help after he removed your shorts and panties, leaving you with only your oversized shirt.
You felt his hands traveling down your body until his fingers touched your folds just to collect your arousal to make you nice and ready for him. Jake jerked himself off for a bit, spreading his precum all over his shaft to finally replace his fingers.
He moaned in your ear when he finally felt your tightness around his cock, the action alone making you quiver. You loved to hear Jake’s pretty noises, especially this close. But you wanted more – and time was running out. 
“Faster,” you whispered while softly dragging your fingernails all over his back, annoyed by his slow pace not increasing gradually as you expected and wanted. 
However, Jake was in the mood of teasing you for a bit – as if you both had plenty of time – by keeping his movements the same, slow and steady, taking his sweet time to watch your frustrated frown. “Jaeyun…” He giggled against your cheek, kissing you afterwards and then he started to go faster, just how you ordered. 
Although he was a teaser sometimes, Jake's favorite thing to do was to comply with your wishes; anything you asked him to do he would be willingly doing it. And during intimate moments, he would take his sweet time to observe and understand every reaction of your body whenever he was touching you, at this point of the relationship already knowing how to read you and how to make you feel even better. 
So when you started to moan his name in between whimpers, one of his hands slid under your shirt to give your boobs a gentle massage, rubbing your nipples, making you squirm underneath him. 
“You’re so pretty,” Jake said tenderly, staring at your face contorted in lust. So gorgeous and just for him. 
His fingers let go of your boobs to rush down to rub your clit when you whispered “I’m close, please, don’t– Don’t stop,” with a ragged breath, pulling him closer in a messy, hot kiss. The well-known wave swept through your whole body as your warm liquid coated Jake’s dick. “Fuck,” you rolled your eyes, enjoying your high before coming back to reality to watch Jake focused on now achieving his own climax. “You always fuck me so good, pretty boy,” you whispered while panting and caressing his sweaty hair, a bit overstimulated by his thrusts into you. He groaned and you felt his dick throbbing inside you. “Always fill me up so good, isn’t that right?” 
“Fuck,” he whimpered, lips parted while his whole body trembled on top of you, his release inside of you making you moan due your sensitiveness. 
“I guess we– We went too intense for a quickie, sweetheart,” he said in between heavy breaths. You laughed, kissing the top of his head. 
“You’ll need another shower.”
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You persisted in carrying on your plan whenever possible, loving Jake in all the ways you could, showing him how much of an amazing, attractive, irresistible and captivating man he truly was. 
Jake was thrilled with all the affection you were showing, not that you never did it before, but he noticed you being more obvious and confident about sexual talks; whenever you got turned on by him doing minimal things, you demonstrated through your words and actions. He knew how hard for you it was sometimes to be so open about your own desires, and he was genuinely happy that you were trying for him, but also unconsciously getting better for yourself. 
You were confident, so was Jake. You both created a bound so unique and powerful that could be scary sometimes, but worth it every second.
Jake appreciated every moment you voiced out your needs, now that you knew that he wanted to know any thoughts of your fantasies about him. 
On the other side, Jake maintained his whipped self as evident as ever.
Your smell all over the house, your gentle touches whenever you both decided to cook together, your laugh sounding far better than any tracks on the car radio, your cute pout when he had to go to work instead of being on the bed with you for a few more minutes, your presence being so notable when you both went out – and Jake feeling lucky to be the one holding your hands and making you giggle – and, of course, your lips always tasting like heaven, like home. 
Jake made sure that you felt needed, loved and cared as well.
And on that day he made one important decision, which was making him a bit more nervous than the normal as he drove you both to a little date on a distant beach you two discovered during one of your many car travels together. 
Paramore’s “Still into you” was playing on the radio and you were singing with a bright smile as if it was for him. He was so in love with you, soft eyes watching you whenever he got the chance, smile never leaving his lips. 
Jake was glad you couldn’t notice his heart beating fast – not only because of how gorgeous under the sunlight you looked, all happy, but due to his nervous self as well.
When he stopped the car, far enough to avoid any possibility of people seeing you two, he had one thing on his mind before putting his whole plan on work, breaking down the romantic atmosphere.
“I know it’s totally out of the blue, but I need to–”
“Eat me out?” You huffed a laugh, holding his hand. “Yeah, I’ve noticed you’re a bit nervous today, my love. Is it because of your presentation next week?” You asked, watching him pause his moves to give you a flabbergasted expression, making you laugh. “I know how to read you, pretty boy,” and with that you gave him a cute wink. 
Jake bit his bottom lip before stepping out of the car. You watched with a smirk as he walked around to open the door for you, just to pull you into a kiss and drag you eagerly to the backseat. 
You giggled in between the kiss as Jake leaned you fully on the seat, hovering you the way he could due the limited space. Both of you were glad that you chose to wear a skirt that day, so things should be a bit easier.
You felt Jake’s hand sneaking into your clothing piece to slowly rub your clit over your panties the same moment he trailed down his lips to nibble every sweet spot of your neck, the one near your ear making you whimper, your hands scratching his scalp gently.
“You have no idea of how much I’ve been craving you. All day thinking about your pussy on my mouth,” his low tone made you shiver.
“I’m all yours, my love,” you replied in a similar tone and heard him letting out a groan.
Jake took your answer as a green sign, his impatient fingers moving your panties to the side so he could start to pump it into you. He observed your soft features turning into lustful ones and  couldn’t hold back his urge to capture your lower lip with his teeth before smirking and going down on you.
“Legs on my shoulder, princess,” Jake said as he positioned himself between your thighs, mouth watering as if he was going for his favorite meal. With your help he moved your panties down just enough for him to dive into you with passion.
Your hands found comfort on his hair, as always. Not only did you loved to grab it, feeling the silky strands running through your fingers, but Jake enjoyed it as well, groaning with pleasure whenever you pulled a bit harder or guided him to ride on his face.
Jake’s mouth made its work on your cunt by sucking, licking and flicking his tongue every once and a while, his nose rubbing on your clit whenever he shook his head purposely to create that friction, hearing your pretty moans filling up the car. Your back arched, your hips bucked forward and your thighs tried to close every time Jake gave more attention to your sensitive clit. His name being the only thing voiced out by you in between moans. 
The sensation of Jake’s hair tickling your thighs worked as a stimulus as well, your body always responded to any of his touches with such intensity, as if you were made just for him. And you strongly believed you were.
“I’ve got you, sugar,” Jake said muffed when he noticed your walls clenching more around his tongue, you threw your head back, breath growing heavier and heavier, your mind doing a full spin because of how good Jake was working on you. “Cum for me, yeah? All over my mouth, babe.” 
And as if he gave you permission to have your orgasm, you did, your juices being drunk by Jake fervently while you screamed his name. You were panting when he leaned over to share your own taste with you. Jake helped you to get yourself together, giving you water and a tender kiss on your forehead. 
After you both recovered – mainly you –, you got out of the car to watch the sunset. As you normally did, you sat on the car hood with his help, and since the car was facing the horizon you both could watch it together in a hug, with Jake between your legs.
“Y’know what I was thinking of?” Jake murmured against your cheek. 
“What?” You asked back, gently playing with his hair. The sound of the waves crashing on the rocks soothing the atmosphere. 
“When I once said I could watch a hundred sunsets with you, you’d still be the prettiest view,” he looked at you with tender, lovingling eyes. 
“Oh,” your lips curved in a sincere smile because of the reminiscence. “The first time we said I love you.”
“Yeah, I still agree with the last part,” he whispered, planting a small peck on your lips as you giggled. “But–” Jake sighed nervously, hesitant on his words. 
Your heart started to beat faster since you noticed a shift in the mood. “Yes, my love?”
“I don’t think a hundred sunsets will be enough, Y/N,” he said seriously and you noticed how his cheeks got colored by a light shade of pink. You blinked, confused. You watched Jake get a little box from his pockets, opening and showing you two rings, one of them having a moon and the other a sun. “Would you let me be with you for a bit more?”
Your lips parted in shock. Your eyes began to burn and before you could even stop it, tears ran down your face as you hugged him tightly, laughing in pure joy, repeatedly saying “yes”. 
Jake once promised you a hundred sunsets – and a bit more. 
Now you promised him your heart. A thousand times, if necessary. 
368 notes · View notes
readychilledwine · 1 month
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What Once Was Lost
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Rhysand Week Day Three - Loved Ones
Summary - Your baby shower should have been the happiest day of your and Cassian's life, but you and Rhysand just can't shake the feeling that something, or someone(s), is missing
Warnings - Loss of parents and siblings, discussion of mourning and grief, brother/sister bonding moment, pregnancy, angst, fluff, implied favoritism from a parental figure
A/N - Happy @officialrhysandweek day 3. Rhysand's love language towards his family screams gifts. I had something like this planned for a girl dad Cassian fic, but doing it with Rhysand just felt so right as things flowed together. I was pretty excited for this to be a prompt for this week because it gave me an excuse to finally write, revamp, and post this.
✨️Rhysand Week Masterlist✨️Rhys Masterlist✨️Master Masterlist✨️
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You were being irrational.
At least you repeated that to yourself over and over as you hid on the balcony. This should have been one of the happiest days of your life. A baby shower to celebrate the life you and Cassian had made after many centuries of trying and trying with no results. Yet, you found yourself a mess of tears and makeup, face buried in your hands and you cried. 
Every celebration came with a feeling of emptiness. It always had and for some reason, you felt it always would. It had been years since the night you woke up to your father's pained screams, since he then clinged to you, holding his last remaining baby girl for dear life, then you lost him too.
You wanted to move on, yet you still felt stagnated, unable to move forward. Something was missing today. Someone. Multiple someones, actually. Your mother, your big sister, your father despite his cruelty. It seemed like a joke to be celebrating without them.
The door opened and shut softly, followed by the scent of salty citrus, “Sister! There you are," Rhysand's face fell as he saw you crying. "Is it that bad,” he asked gently. “Did I mess up planning this that badly? Is it the cake? The white? I promise its-”
“It's not any of that, no,” you interjected. “I- its.”
“Oh.” He knew. Rhysand knew. He had felt it on his own wedding day, after the birth of his own son, after every milestone he accomplished. “You know they would want you happy-”
Those words made you sob harder, hugging yourself tightly. You felt this level of mourning wasn't healthy after so many years, so many heartaches, but it was as if your life had adapted and grown around the murders of your mother and big sister instead of moving on from it.
“Y/n, the depth of your mourning does not determine how much you loved them. What determines that is how we honor them.” Rhysand moved to lean next to you on the wall, “And have we done that. We've changed things mother felt would remain the same until the end of time, we rebuilt the Rainbow in honor of Stel, we ensured their stories were heard, written into the Night Court's history. We even honored our father through alliances, trade, and the crowns we wear.” 
He wiped his own eyes before continuing, “We've honored them by becoming the male and female they expected us to be. By becoming the husband and wife to our partners that they expected us to be. By loving each other and pushing each other to be better the way they expected us to. We've honored them by being happy, by cherishing each other. You, my starlight, have been my treasure since they left us.”
You only smiled slightly, “Until you had Nyx.” Your nephew, your light. He was the source of happiness for the Inner Circle you all had never seen coming. He had spun everyone's world, but mostly Rhysand's. Nyx filled a void with his sweet squishy face and bright blue eyes filled with wonder and joy.
“No,” your brother said the word with such gentleness but firmly. “You are still my treasure. My son is my world. And when i see you with him, I feel complete.” He meant that. You could tell by the little look of pride he had.
The transition from Rhysand as a full-time workaholic to almost stay at home dad had been a rough one, but one he would not undo. Feyre practically ran the Night Court now, while Rhysand enjoyed a life of fatherhood and solitude unless necessary. No one outside of the Inner Circle knew that fact, of course, but slowly, they would.
“Nyx will reshape the world some day,” his hand moved to rest on your stomach, his body moving to face you as it did, “And this little life you a carrying, this little being who is already so celebrated, so loved, who has already brought so much joy, this is his sibling. The closest thing he will ever have with Feyre's choice to never have a child again.”
Rhysand's hand felt your bump, trying to find where the soul growing inside of you was resting. “It's time to stop the circle of grief, dear sister,” he made you look at him. “To live. To love freely. To hold tight to the things we both cherish most. You are carrying the greatest blessing you could ever give this family.”
His eyes were still on that swell of life, a soft smile as he thought out his future niece or nephew, “Two more months,” you reminded him. “You can hold them in two more months.”
“It's forever,” he pouted before placing both hands on your tummy. “Have you two picked names?”
You could only nod as you two held eye contact. You searched those comforting eyes for any sign or hint of the gender you'd be giving birth to. He was the only one who knew the gender of the baby, information he carried so close to his heart he had not even told Feyre. You and Cassian had wanted to be surprised at birth, but your mate's anticipation made it impossible to wait 61 more days.
Rhysand had planned this whole party around that fact. The garden was filled with white flowers. The house had white linens and decorations. He’d gone as far as having enchanted white flowers spread throughout Velaris. 
After the overly extravagant dinner being served, you and Cassian would be moved under the flower arch he'd constructed with Elain. Then, when you both indicated you were ready, the flowers would change to pink or blue. Cassian, Feyre, Eris, and Azriel were all supporting pink, praying for a sweet baby girl. You were in black, matching your brother, in a silent message that you both wanted healthy. Mor, Amren, Elain, Nesta, and Lucien all Sported accents of blue, using old fisher wife stories to say you were carrying a baby boy. 
Rhysand pulled your mind back to the present, to him, with a soft kiss on your forehead. “You look so much like Mother. When I miss her, I look at you and find peace and comfort. I am reminded of the way she looked at me because your eyes look at me the same.” 
He hugged you the best he could, letting there be silence as your tears finally stopped. Rhysand had dedicated his life to Velaris, to the found family you two shared, to you. Your heart and mind knew that dedication would pass to this baby, to raising them to be strong willed, confident, humbled. “People are waiting for us,” he whispered into your hair. “Your husband is waiting for you two. Let's go eat.”
It was a gentle pull of your hand, bringing you to the center spot of the table next to Cassian. Lamb, chicken, prime rib. Rhys had spared no expense to make sure this day was special for you, and the meal filled with all your favorite proteins and sides was proof of that. Food was enjoyed with laughter, final wagers placed between the Inner Circle and Vanserras. 
The time had finally come, faelights guiding you and Cassian to where Rhysand wanted you to stand. Smaller lights had been woven into the arch made from roses, peonies, and wisteria. 
Cassian was a ball of energy, smile growing as he held both of your hands, “Ready, starlight?” 
“Ready,” you confirmed, and before your eyes, shades of pink filled the garden. Pink daisies, pink roses, pink asters and tulips. It bathed the room in promises of gentleness, compassion, beauty, and kindness, the qualities your mother and father raised you to have as Princess of the Night Court. Qualities Rhysand had continued to teach you long after their deaths. 
Cassian lifted you immediately, crying as he held you against him, mumbling into your neck how you had honored him. How you were giving him the most precious thing he'd ever have. Whispering his promises to protect her, to love her, to be a good father to his angel.
The celebration in garden was slowly drowned out by the loud party that had erupted through the streets of Velaris. Fireworks going off, music playing at the highest volume, bells chiming from the temple. The only sign of something different was the wisteria, fading to its soft purple shade, your older sister's favorite flower, your mother's favorite color. Rhys made a confused face at the sight of it before smiling. 
“That's not supposed to be happen,” Feyre seemed almost panicked, moving to fix them.
Rhysand grabbed her hand, stopping her in her tracks, “That's my mother and sister,” he said quietly. “They're letting us know they're here.”
“How would your dad indicate he's here,” Feyre joked. 
Rhysand only pointed to where a crow sat watching from the tree. Its dark eyes were on you and you alone as the Inner Circle rushed to take turns holding you and Cassian as you both cried out of joy. “Same way he watched her when she was little. Always playing favorites.”
Rhys moved to you then, playfully pushing Cassian away to take his turn. “You have my blessing,” the sentence needed no further details, no explanation. He was letting you use your mother's name. Your lip began to tremble, Cassian nodded as he and Rhysand looked at each other. “I can't wait to meet sweet little Astra."
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ceesimz · 5 months
Text
Golden Key To The Sweet Life - PT2
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Adjusting to life with a child was as daunting as expected; having a whole human being depend on you was quite possibly the most terrifying thing in the world. Yet, when wide brown eyes stared up at you in the dead of the night and ten little fingers gripped just one of yours, it felt like you were made for it.
Newborns were possibly the laziest species of all, and you loved it. The first few weeks of her life, all Anaís did was eat, sleep, eat, and sleep some more. That left plenty of time for you to marvel at every little thing about her; the few wisps of dark brown hair she had, her perfect button nose, her tiny feet that were ever-moving, and her hands with the most adorable nails you'd ever seen, if that was possible. Not to mention the smell of her, which you thought was a myth, how women were obsessed with the smell of their baby, but you weren't embarrassed to admit it was entirely true. Alexia loved to tease you about it, but when one time in the middle of the night you'd caught her doing the exact same thing as you, she reluctantly gave in and joined you in your opinion.
The beauty of parenthood unfolds in countless ways, and the wonder of seeing the world anew through your child's eyes is unparalleled. You'd come to learn that even the simplest things made to be the most incredible memories. But the thing that got you the most though, was not only the prospect of all the memories your family were going to make, but what life Anaís might live.
Would she follow in Alexia's footsteps and become a football legend? Would she follow your path instead, a more educated and business led one? Would she become a doctor and save hundreds of lives, would she become the first astronaut to land on Mars, or would she spend her life living at home with you and Alexia? You didn't care what she would grow to be, your first rule of parenting was to never hold expectations against them beyond the normal ones of being kind and whatnot. The pride you felt towards her at such a young age was so extreme and overwhelming, you couldn't begin to process what it would be like when she came into her own as a person. Truly, there was no greater joy than being a parent, that much was true, and you hadn't even experienced any of the larger milestones yet.
There were moments over your life, before Anaís, where you worried about how much you'd be able to handle a child. Sometimes you wondered if you even wanted kids, but the thought of not having Anaís in your world now was... god, you couldn't even imagine it.
Even when she was screaming at the top of her lungs, refusing to sleep.
"Anaís, mi chiqui, por favor. Go to sleep." You begged, slowly stepping around the room whilst rocking a crying Anaís in your arms.
You'd tried it all by now, and nothing was working. Diaper change, feeding her, soothing her, cuddling her, everything you could think of. But nothing was good enough. There were tears brimming in your own eyes, thoroughly exhausted due to the restless night Anaís had had so far, and it seemed the end wasn't in sight yet.
"Please, please, little one." You sniffled, your emotions finally consuming you as one of your tears fell to merge with Anaís' own on her cheeks. "I don't get what's wrong!"
For all you knew, Alexia was in the bedroom a few feet down the hallway, soundly asleep. Blissfully unaware of the difficulties you faced in the next room over. Selfishly, the thought only made matters worse. A strangled shout escaped you before you could stop it, stressing both yourself and Anaís out inexplicably more.
By the grace of something your shattered mind couldn't name, that last call out from you had awoken the Spaniard, and she soon came stumbling into the nursery, instantly sobered from her sleep upon the sight she walked into.
Your face was red from stress and sobs, Anaís' tiny little cheeks matching yours as her face scrunched uncomfortably with each scrike she let out, and you only cried more at the sight of Alexia.
"Mi amor, what's happening?" Alexia rushes over to you, cautiously taking Anaís from your arms as her eyes flick worryingly between you both.
"She won't stop crying!" You sob, hiding your face into her neck. "I've d-done every- everything, she just won't stop."
"Okay, okay. Hey, what time is it, amor? Can you check for me please? Just that one thing, my love, that's all." Alexia asks, hoping there was a remaining part of your overwhelmed mind that was still lucid.
"Um, it's- it's almost four, I think." You choke out, slumping into the rocking chair and crying into your hands.
"Thank you, amor, that's all I needed. Stay right here, can you hold our mija for just a minute whilst I get something? I will be right back, I will be really quick."
You nod, and Alexia presses a firm kiss to your forehead before placing Anaís back in your arms. The 8-week-old had almost fully exerted herself now, no more loud cries coming from her, only a few upset whines that broke your heart nonetheless. Wiping your face on the shoulder of your shirt, you cradle Anaís closely and rest your forehead against hers gently.
"I'm sorry I can't figure it out. I'm so sorry." You mutter exasperatedly, a few tears falling onto the baby's head.
Thankfully, Alexia races back into the room, holding something that would hopefully be the solution to Anaís' problem. The realisation of what was most likely wrong with her struck your heart.
"She is probably feeling unwell from her injections, amor. Let's give her some of this, it should make her feel better."
In her hand was a bottle of medicine for young infants, made for specific times like this. The previous day, Anaís had had her 8 week jabs and the doctor had suggested that she may feel a little under the weather afterwards, something that was completely normal, and the medicine Alexia held more often than not worked in the same way paracetamol did for people with cold symptoms. Anaís didn't seem to be running a fever, much to your relief, but she was obviously in some discomfort and it killed you that you hadn't thought of it.
"Yes, yes, give it her." You respond shakily, standing up as Alexia measures the right amount into the small syringe.
It takes a little while to give Anaís the small dose of medicine, having to give tiny amounts in quick intervals since she was so young, but a few minutes later she'd had it all with little fight. She's still very unsettled, but her tears have fully stopped now, instead letting out a few grunts as she wriggles restlessly.
"Hopefully she will feel better in a few minutes. Do you need anything, amor? Anything at all?" Alexia offers quietly, her hands coming up to rest on your cheeks as she wipes your tears away so delicately.
"No, I'm okay. You can go back to sleep now if you want." You tell her, not meeting her eyes.
"Hey, I'm staying with you and chiqui. Let me know how you are, s��?" Her eyebrows furrowed anxiously as her eyes assessed your face.
"I'm fine." You sniffle, but she instantly shakes her head.
"Mi amor, you seem so tired and stressed. Let's get back to bed and relax. I can text our friends that we won't make it to lunch later too?"
"No, we can still go. It'll be fine." You give her a tight-lipped smile, hoping it'll convince her, but your eyes are bloodshot and weighed down by some dark bags, and she sees straight through you.
"They know that parenting is never perfect or straight-forward, amor, we can just reschedule. You need the rest and so does Anaís, okay? I will text them. Come on, back to bed." She wraps an arm around your shoulders and guides you out of Anaís' room.
Once you're back in your shared bedroom, you sit back against the headboard and Alexia sits on the edge of the bed next to your legs. One of her hands rests on your bare knee as you wore a t-shirt and shorts in the hot summer weather, and she gazed at you with no love lost.
"She's tired herself out I think. With all the crying." You stated, unsure what to say when she's looking at you like she was. Alexia simply smiled and nodded, watching as Anaís' eyes finally fluttered shut.
"Look. She's okay now. We're all okay." She says, shifting a little closer and pressing a kiss to you cheek. "I love you. You are the best Mama that Anaís could have."
You don't reply, overridden by worries and doubts and tiredness to even consider the statement she'd made, so you just shrug and feel Anaís properly settle down, now asleep.
"Could you put her in her cot, please?"
Alexia nods immediately and stands before picking up Anaís, careful not to wake her, and murmurs a few words in Spanish to her followed by a feather-light kiss to her cheek, then she places her in the cot beside the bed. You watched the scene in front of you, it never failing to put a smile on your face even in the worse moments of parenting.
As Alexia makes her way back into bed, you shift to lay on your side facing Anaís, a position you lay in almost every night as it's reasurring to be able to see her so close to you whilst she sleeps due to the netting on the side of the crib. Alexia shifts up behind you and leans up on one elbow to press a kiss to your cheek, before hugging you tightly back into her.
"I'm proud of you. I love watching you being a Mami. It's my favourite thing ever." Alexia whispers, her thumb stroking over the soft skin of your hip under your shirt.
"Really?" You laugh humorlessly. "Even when I'm screaming and shouting and crying because I'm so fucking stressed? Because I can't help my own baby?"
Alexia frowns and rests up on one elbow again, using her other hand to press you onto your back so she can get a look at your face.
"Why would you say that?" Alexia asks in a voice that came across more stern than she wanted it.
"You saw the state of me when you walked in. It was such an obvious solution, what she needed, and it did not cross my mind at all. She was feeling poorly and I didn't notice. I couldn't figure it out." Your ranting voice trailed off with the last two sentences, your worries all-consuming in the moment.
"Oh, mi chica." Alexia sighs, laying down and urging you to curl into her side with your face hidden in her chest. "Don't say things like that, it breaks my heart. I believe in you as a parent more than anyone in the world, there's no one I trust more with our chiqui than you, amor. It is your first time being a parent, I do not blame you for anything. Nothing at a-"
"So why are you so perfect then? It's your first time too, yet you handle everything so much better than me." You cut her off with an argument that sounds more accusing than it actually was. Thankfully Alexia knew you didn't mean it maliciously, the only nasty thing in this situation was the doubtful devil on your shoulder.
"I just try my best, as do you. I still overthink every little thing I do and I still worry all the time. It's been a long and emotional day turned night and you're exhausted, it's fine that you didn't think of her feeling poorly because the doctors said it's a fifty-fifty chance she'd even fall ill. This is why we co-parent, because when one needs the other, we're always there. And when we need to rely on each other, that's absolutely fine. When we need help, that's fine too. I'm not perfect, neither of us will ever be the perfect parent, but to me you are perfect. I promise there is no one else I'd rather raise children with. Anaís loves you so much, and I love you so much."
She rambles on, words of devotion and appreciation seemingly spilling from her like it's second nature. At some point during her impromptu speech, her free hand had travelled up to your head as she lightly stroked through your hair.
"Do you hear me, amor?"
With a shy nod, you bury your face in her chest and sigh shakily.
"I love you." You mumble, your hand that rested on her waist squeezing gratefully.
"I love you too. Put that irrational voice in your head to the side and let's sleep as long as possible before she wakes up again. Then, we can relax all day. Even if that means staying in bed the whole time, and you know I never let that happen." Alexia jokes, relieved to hear the short, quiet giggle you let out. "I will always be proud of you. Comprendo? Always."
"Sí, Ale. Thank you." You murmur, taking one last glance at Anaís who is still sleeping soundly now that she's feeling better. Then you lay back down against Alexia's chest, loving nothing more than falling asleep cuddled up to her. "Is it okay for me to sleep like this?"
"More than okay, amor. Rest well."
Despite it not being the comfiest position for her, Alexia happily lays there and holds you until you fall asleep, which happens fairly quick. With a little readjustment and a disgruntled noise coming from you, she shifts to a better position before falling into a slumber soon after.
All the lows of parenting were miniscule in comparison to the highs, because when Anaís smiles so brightly for the first time in her life the next day, the events of the previous night were almost entirely forgotten. It happened whilst Alexia was downstairs making breakfast, you'd just dressed Anaís in her nursery and as you were smiling down at her, albeit tired and slightly delirious, she just returned the smile like it was something she'd been doing all her (short) life.
When Alexia made her way back upstairs, a filled breakfast tray in her arms, her heart dropped when she walked past the ajar door to Anaís' room to hear you sniffling once more. She thought it was something to do with the previous night, so she quickly set the food down in your room before racing back.
"What's wrong?" She asks tenderly, gently placing her hands on your shoulders as to not scare you.
"She, she smiled at me." You stammer, overjoyed at such a beautiful milestone.
"She what?" Alexia lightly moved you over so that she could stand beside you at the changing table, looking down at your daughter where she wiggled happily.
"She smiled at me! A big, gummy smile!" You repeated, Alexia laughing giddily.
"Really?!" She cried out. "How?"
"What do you mean, how?" You giggled, to which she lightly nudged your side and rolled her eyes.
"How did it happen?"
"I don't know, I was just looking at her and smiling at her little outfit and she smiled back." You recounted, a few sly tears leaking from the corners of your eyes.
"Mm, who wouldn't smile at a face like yours, amor?" It was your turn to roll your eyes, this time at her charm. "Let me see if I can make her smile."
You watch on as Alexia delicately takes hold of Anaís feet with one hand as the other comes up to dance her fingers up and down the bottom of her feet. The reaction is almost immediate.
"Oh my god, she did it again!"
You giggle at the grin offered up by the little girl in front of you, your cheeks aching as the happiness of the moment is worth everything that you'd gone through and more. And the look on Alexia's face too? It's priceless.
All in all though, one of Alexia's biggest loves was of course football, which meant there was only so long she could go without playing. However, she also couldn't bare the thought of leaving your side for too long now that Anaís was in her life, so she opted out of the international pre-season camp that the team had organised and instead chose to stay back at home to do her own specialised camp at the Barcelona training facilities. Training days were longer compared to the little and often gym days she'd had over the last few months, but for her there was absolutely nothing better than knowing that you and Anaís were waiting for her with open arms, no matter how her day had gone.
Her new way of life gave her a completely different perspective for her career, and it felt like her motivation for, not only football, but her life in general had been completely redefined. She had a tiny human being to care for now, and everytime she kicked the ball, everytime she stepped on the pitch, every pass she completed, everything she did was done so with an urgency to be as perfect as possible. And no, that wasn't a toxic mindset, because as the past couple weeks had shown her, there was hardly such a thing called perfection. Undoubtedly she was annoyed at herself whenever she made a mistake, that would never change, but as long as Anaís still greeted her with that infamous gummy smile of hers everytime she saw Alexia, it was hard to be so negative when the meaning of her life gazed up at her like Anaís did.
However, the prize that was her career came at the expense of sometimes missing out on moments that tore her heart in two.
Ever since Anaís had first smiled, Alexia had been on a mission to achieve the next milestone: hearing her giggle for the first time. The happiness of her little girl was addictive, and she was sure that when she heard her laugh for the first time, she'd want to hear it every second for the rest of her life.
Unfortunately, timings weren't on her side.
In her hotel room, hours away from her family, she checked her phone for the first time since she got back from her game that evening to see a video you had sent. And what she was met with was so beautiful, but so heartbreaking.
With your friend behind the camera, you were stood in front of the TV screen with Alexia's game playing, holding Anaís over your head and slowly lowering her down until you can blow raspberries on her tummy. Her reaction? Letting out the most adorable, high-pitched giggle. Otherwise known as the sound Alexia had been dying to hear. With that, she dropped her phone to the bed beside where she sat and covered her face in her hands.
Of course she was over the moon at such a milestone, but she found herself moved to tears at the fact she wasn't there to witness it for herself. The person she'd go to when she was down was obviously you, but when she checked the time on her watch, she saw that it was about this part of the evening that you started Anaís' nighttime routine to get her settled. It was a precarious process and the less distractions, the smoother it goes. So instead, she turned to the the other woman of reason in her life, her own Mami.
"Hi mija. How are you?" Eli answers within two rings, herself back at home in Barcelona too.
"Hola Mami, I'm okay. Did you see the game?" Not quite possessing the willpower to open up yet, she started up a light and easy conversation.
"Of course I did, it was very good. Was Keira okay after the game? She went off, right?"
"Ah, yes, she did. Just cramp, I think." Alexia murmurs, a frown on her face as she messes with the corner of the pillow and concentrates on not falling apart so quickly. But after all, it is her own Mother she's talking to.
"And how are you, really?" There it is. That's the phase that breaks anyone who's on the verge of tears.
"Um, overall I'm okay, but tonight... a bit... not okay." Her voice cracks as she speaks, her frown more prominent as a single tear sneaks out.
"Why's that, mija?" Alexia hesitates. "You can tell me anything Ale, you know that. No matter what it is."
"Well, it's not really a secret that I'm not a big fan of travelling for football. It's always been that way and you've known that." Eli hums in acknowledgement down the line. "But now, it's... so much harder. Leaving my family at home. Anaís, she changes everyday and I'm missing that."
"And you rang me because you're too afraid to ring home, aren't you?" As ever, Eli could read Alexia inexplicably well, even hundreds of miles apart.
"Yes. Because it's not their fault, it's nobody's fault. I know it is just life and it's my choice, nobody is forcing me to continue playing, but now I'm starting to wonder if it's all worth it when I'm missing out on something so incredible. Anaís laughed for the first time this evening, and I was hours away, in a different country, on a football pitch, doing what?" Alexia scoffs, bringing a hand to her forehead with a quiet groan.
"You were out on a football pitch doing your job, achieving your dream, earning to provide a great future for your family, Alexia. It's not all for nothing, it's for everything. It's for Anaís' future and how well she gets to live, that's a privilege. It's for your future child's life and how well they get to live too. This is your dream, your Papi's dream, this is everything you've worked for all your life. Your children will get to reap the benefits from it, and you'll get to watch them grow up and lead beautiful lives because of the opportunities you will provide for them." Eli reasurres her, and Alexia begins to feel better by the second.
"I know. I know. You're right, Mami. Always."
"Sí, siempre." Eli agrees with strong conviction, making Alexia laugh quietly. "Think of how many more laughs you will hear from Anaís, Ale. You have a lifetime of laughter with her. Her first laugh, it was caught on camera, I got sent the video too. So you didn't miss it, you can watch it all night long tonight. Don't get so clouded about this, I know you and how your mind works and when your nena is back in your arms tomorrow, all this will be forgotten. But if we need a longer conversation about it, you can speak to me whenever."
"You... you get me everytime, Mami." Alexia smiles, Eli laughing heartily. "Thank you. You are right. I will get over all of this. T'estimo, I will see you tomorrow?"
"Mhm, at dinner. Ring your corazón tonight, escuchame? Hablar con ella, she will want to know. Then get some rest, sí? Mi hija, jo també t'estimo. Bona nit."
"Bona nit, Mami."
Before she got herself settled for the night, she fired off a quick text to you that asked for you to ring her when you had a moment. She knew it could be five minutes or five hours until you rang her, and she would happily accept either.
Once she had done her own night routine, she gets into bed knowing she will probably not get a lot of sleep tonight, even if she's not got to get up for a unhappy baby. With that knowledge, she grabs her phone again and watches the video from earlier. Before, she'd only gotten to the part where Anaís had giggled for the first time. What she hadn't seen though was the next few seconds of it, where the match broadcast had shown a close-up of herself. Stood to the side of the screen, your friend zoomed in on Anaís' face who had recognised her Mami on the screen and let out another burst of giggles before hiding her face in your neck.
It warmed Alexia's heart to no end, and all her thoughts from earlier flew out the window at the footage she'd just seen. Whether it was physical or not, she had been there in the moment of Anaís' milestone, and she had been there in the mind of her daughter at such a time. In fact, she had also made her laugh in the moment, and that meant the world to her. She just needed to experience it in real time now.
A little later, when she was watching some junk on the hotel TV, her phone finally rang with an incoming call from you.
"Hola, amor. Thank you for ringing me." Alexia breathes out as she lays on her side in bed.
"Of course, Ale. I watched the game, it was a good result. How are you after it? Feeling alright?" You whisper, sat up against the headboard and watching Anaís as she sleeps soundly.
"Sí, todo bien. How are you? Did Anaís get to sleep okay?" Alexia's eyes shut as she asks, picturing her daughter laughing to her heart's content.
"We're all good here, she's snoozing away beside me. Bedtime went as smooth as possible." You smile and resist the urge to reach out to take Anaís' hand, not wanting to disrupt her sleep. "With a few giggles here and there."
"I saw the video. Qué niña tan increíble es, no?"
"Isn't she just?" You sigh contentedly. "Did you see the part where she giggled at you on the TV?"
"I did. I just wish I was actually there to see it." Alexia mumbles, and you can easily detect the sadness in her voice.
"I know. I... I was in half a mind whether to send the video to you or not. Because I knew it would probably upset you, that you weren't here for it. I know how much you wanted to see it."
"No, no, I'm so glad you did. Forget the football game, it made my night. I will get to see her tomorrow, it'll be fine."
A few things you'd learnt in your time with Alexia: one, she was great at shunning her feelings to the side if it made other's lives easier. Two, she would reach a point where that habit of hers would cause a meltdown. And three, you were her weak point, and she could never shy away from pouring her heart out for too long to you.
"I know you, Ale." You state softly. "I know you're more upset than you let on."
"Mm. I was but I rang my Mami and I feel better now."
"You promise?"
"I promise." Alexia smiles, because she knows that tomorrow she'll have her daughter and the love of her life back in her arms, and it'll all be okay.
"Okay. Let me know if you want to talk about it, anytime at all." Alexia hums in acknowledgement. "I have an idea."
"What's that?"
"Tomorrow, instead of getting the coach back from the airport, why don't Anaís and I pick you up?" You suggest, knowing exactly what she needs, which is to see her daughter.
"I would love that. That would be amazing." Alexia replies breathlessly a few moments later. "I would really love that."
"Then it's a plan, hm? We'll be there, waiting for you. Might even make a sign. 'Welcome home, Mami! '" You tease, grinning when Alexia chuckles shyly.
"I have been gone for a few days only. I'm not coming home from prison, amor."
"Hm, don't lie, I know you'd love it if I did do that though. I see right through you, Alexia."
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever." You hear her stifle a yawn, and though it's not late, playing 90+ minutes of football whilst caring for a young baby are two things that are already exhausting in itself.
"Get some peaceful sleep while you have the opportunity. I'm jealous." Alexia huffs.
"You know I don't sleep after a game. Even worse when you're not with me." She complains.
"Okay, then I'll stay on the phone whilst I have a bath and I'll wait until you fall asleep." You hear the smirk before she even replies.
"And how will I sleep if I know you're in the bath?"
"You would think that now you've got a child, you'd be somewhat more mature." You roll your eyes but there's a hint of a smile on your face. "I'm not going to video call you because I know for a fact you wouldn't sleep then. I'll just talk your ear off. You normally reach a point where you stop listening when I do that."
"Anaís does too. You talk her ear off a lot."
"It's good for her development! When she starts talking at eleven months instead of twelve, you'll be thanking me."
The pair of you continue to chat and joke for long into the night, you deciding to ditch your plans for a bath and Alexia more than happy to listen to you discuss whatever came to your mind. For the whole duration of the call, there's a soft smile on her face that doubles in size when she hears you gently shushing and soothing Anaís when she fussed a little in her sleep. It was safe to say she was more excited for her airport pickup the next day than she was for anything in her life.
Because the sight of her little girl in your arms the following afternoon was a thing she didn't know it was possible to miss so dearly over a short period of time. You didn't have a sign, but in one of Anaís' tiny fists was a small Barcelona flag that matched the jersey she wore too. As soon as Alexia caught sight of you both, she ditched the conversation she was in the middle of and broke off into a light jog towards you. Anaís was turned away from her at first, but when she got closer, you shifted the little girl in your arms and pointed towards her Mami running over.
And what did she do then? At the sight of Alexia, running with her luggage and her laptop in her arms with a shy grin on her face, Anaís giggled.
"Ay, dios mío. Mi chiqui." Her voice was quiet and shaky when she spoke, immediately placing her bag down and her laptop on it before reaching out for Anaís. "Hola, nena. Hi!"
You wrap an arm around her waist and rest your head on her shoulder, laughing when Anaís reaches a little hand out to grab at Alexia's nose. The rest of the team stay back and watch the moment, Mapi having filmed it all as she knew it'd be a memory Alexia would want to keep. They had never seen this side of Alexia, where her heart was merely a puddle on the floor due to the love she held for her daughter. Anaís didn't know it yet of course, but she had Alexia wrapped around her finger from the minute she was born, and that was never going to change.
"Oh, I have missed her so much." Alexia sighs, resting her forehead against Anaís' cheek and repeatedly pressing kisses to the soft skin there. Quickly, the baby's attention inevitably falls elsewhere - being in such a hectic public space like an airport was just so intriguing for her.
"She missed you too. Look at that smile! She's dribbling all over the place." You state, Alexia shrugging nonchalantly.
"I don't care. Anaís, oye, mírame." Alexia leans back and gently pokes her daughter's cheek to gain her attention back. However, the young girl was seemingly stuck in a giggly trance as Mapi creeps closer, pulling a different face with every step she takes. "Mapi! Basta, pendeja! You are distracting her!"
You laugh at Alexia's jealousy and Mapi's subsequent pout, quickly wiping away Anaís' drool with the bib she had on.
"Ay, Ale, don't swear in front of your child." Mapi tuts, a smug grin on her face as she lightly tickles under Anaís' chin and pulls yet another giggle from her. It's simply music to Alexia's ears.
"María, come on, leave them alone." Ingrid takes Mapi's hand and pulls her away but not without a grumble from her.
Finally, now that Mapi and her childish tendencies are gone, Anaís decides to turn her attention back to Alexia.
"There is my chiqui." Alexia bops her nose lightly, eliciting her new favourite sound from her. "Shall we go home?" Anaís grins, her little tongue poking out as she does so. "Mhm, home time! Venga, Mama, let's go so we can cuddle on the couch."
With another laugh, this time at Alexia's eagerness, you pick up her laptop as well as the Barça flag that had fallen from Anaís' hand at some point, and place them both in the backpack Alexia was wearing. With Alexia holding Anaís, you go to grab her suitcase but she gets there before you.
"I have it, mamacita." Alexia smirks as she says it, and you roll your eyes and start walking. "Hm, hola to you too. I missed you also, by the way."
"Come on, my favourite groveller. Let's get dribbles here back home, she needs a nap soon."
Before she knows it, Alexia is dead to the world asleep with her head on your lap as you comb through her hair delicately and Anaís sleeps on her chest. It was a sight you had missed more than you realised, and you of course had to pull your phone out and document it. For Alexia, there was truly nothing better than being at home.
In a baby's first year of life, first-times and milestones come thick and fast. Foremost is the first feed, the first diaper change, the first sleep. Changes in both their behaviour and their appearance happen so quick, it's hard to keep up. Those initial milestones may be seen as minor, if you look past the sentimentality to them, because when the 'proper' developments start happening, that's when it gets special but utterly hectic.
Three major things seem to happen at once for Anaís. Two of them are fine, amazing actually, as they're the first step of leaving infancy: sleeping in her own room and starting to be introduced to solid food. But it's the third one that catches Alexia completely off-guard, something that happens out of the blue, and it has the Spaniard panicking like nothing else.
One moment, she's changing Anaís' diaper, the next minute, her child has vanished.
You were elsewhere in the house, probably using the valuable alone time to be productive with house chores, so you were none the wiser. Alexia had turned away for hardly a second, but Anaís was long gone.
How, one may ask?
Well, the little girl just decided to up and crawl away on her own accord.
To be honest, she didn't get very far, and neither did Alexia's panic last too long because only a few seconds later did she hear the familiar grunts of her daughter and the quiet slaps of her hands against the wooden panels of the lounge floor.
So when Alexia got up and walked towards the sound, there Anaís was, casually crawling around like it was nothing.
"Dios mío, Anaís, you scared me!" Alexia sighs, relieved, as she picks her up and puts her on her hip. "Eres tan descarada, pequeña. Honestly."
Then Alexia turned, leaving the room and wandering upstairs to find you. Anaís' nursery was empty, nor were there any sounds of life coming from any of the other rooms, so she knocked lightly on your shared bedroom door before walking in. She let out a short burst of laughter when you scrambled up off the bed, slightly embarrassed at being caught laying unproductively in bed on your phone.
"What is it?" You blurted out, cheeks a little red.
"Amor, we have a problem." Alexia sighed dramatically, worrying you slightly.
"Okay, are you going to tell me, or..?" You asked, stepping closer and smiling at the dribbling baby in Alexia's arms. She greeted you with her now toothy grin, almost like she knew the chaos she was soon to cause.
"You will never guess what just happened." Alexia laughed, as did Anaís, consequently making you laugh too.
"Tell me then!"
"I was changing her, and I looked away for one second to bag up the dirty diaper, and she was gone. She crawled away, amor. So quick." Your jaw falls in shock, eyes flicking between Alexia's slightly fearful face and Anaís' blissfully unaware one.
"You're joking." Alexia shakes her head.
"No. We have a little explorer on our hands now. We will have to tape our eyes open, otherwise we could blink and she will be gone."
You stay frozen for a little longer, eyes wide and mouth agasp, before your body deflates and you slap your palm against your forehead with a deep groan.
"Welcome to the start of toddler life, amor!"
The chaos of having a small child that now possessed many worrisome abilities wasn't all bad, because after all, there were still many moments that continuously proved everything that parenthood involved was 100% worth it.
Any challenges or difficulties that life threw at you and Alexia were almost always temporarily forgotten whenever Anaís was around. That was the best thing about having a child; they are so young and innocent and cheerful, it's hard to feel down for too long when they're giggling in your face or squealing at nothing or even just sleeping in your arms.
That's where Alexia found herself today.
Even with her newfound confidence and willpower for football, sometimes that all slipped out from underneath her feet. That was the case with the game she'd just arrived home from. Anaís had had a small sleep regression recently, causing the both of you to be up and down constantly all night. Ultimately it took its toll on the both of you, but with you still on maternity leave whilst Alexia travelled around Spain and Europe for match after match, she was inexplicably exhausted.
Everything had caught up with her it seemed, because no matter how hard she tried and how frustrated she got, nothing went her way in the game. So much so that she was taken off at the 60 minute mark due to her performance, something that hadn't happened to her in... well, she couldn't remember.
The only positive from the day was the fact it was a home game, meaning she'd be able to crawl into bed and hide from the world for sometime with her little family. She wouldn't be lying if she said she had never desired anything more.
When she got back to the house, you were in the kitchen having just eaten a late dinner as Anaís was lay in her mobile swing, the saving grace to her sleeping issues as it seemed to be the only thing to get her off to sleep at night now. There was a plate of food waiting in the microwave for Alexia, but her appetite was completely gone at this point.
"Hola." She whispered when she walked into the room.
"Ale." You smiled sadly at her broken demeanour, immediately opening your arms. With a slight hesitation, she comes over and allows herself to let go in your embrace, and the tension you feel under your arms tells you everything you need to know about her current state of mind. "I know you're probably frustrated with yourself about today, but I want you to know I'm still proud of you. For everything, absolutely everything."
"W... Why?" Alexia mumbles insecurely.
With a frown, you lean back slightly and bring up both hands to rest on her cheeks. She doesn't meet your eyes until you raise her chin up a little, and it opens up a world of emotional complexity.
"Why am I proud of you?" You repeat and Alexia nods. "Because you are playing football at the highest standard in Europe and achieving so much, whilst also being the best Mami for our little girl. That's hard, Alexia, two very difficult things to juggle at once and you just do it. I can't ask anymore from you. That is why I'm proud of you."
She makes a noise of uncertainty, almost like she can't believe you'd say such a thing. At that, you sigh and urge her to bury her face back into your neck, to which she does so instantly. One of her hands comes up to clutch at the back of your neck as the other wraps tightly around the small of your back, and you let her stay like that for as long as she needs.
Some time passed before she decided to pull back, to which she rested her temple against yours for a few seconds until she looked down at you.
"Thank you." Alexia breathes out, turning slightly to look at where Anaís was fast asleep in her swing. "I... I know she is asleep, but can I pick her up? Please?" You pull a face at the question, wondering why she's asking to pick up her own daughter, but Alexia interprets it differently. "I just need to hold her, amor. If I wake her up, it's my fault and I-"
"No, Ale, of course you can pick her up. Of course you can." You tell her, and she moves instantly.
This version of Alexia you unfortunately knew too well. Even as a senior, veteran player, her whole self-worth completely crumbled whenever she gave a poor performance in a game. It was something about her that would probably never change, so you had grown accustomed to it over time. And tonight was one of those especially bad occasions, but it's the first time it had happened since Anaís had come into your lives, so you were sure that the little girl's presence was involved in the buildup to Alexia's current mindset, but she could also be the exact solution the Spaniard needed.
With your worries for your partner in the back of your mind, you watched as Alexia delicately unclasped the buckle keeping Anaís secure before picking her up.
"Shh, mi nena, sólo soy yo, tu Mami." She quietly soothed her, one hand holding Anaís up against her shoulder as the other rubs comfortingly across her back. The little girl immediately turns her face into Alexia's neck, mewling at the disruption before she soon settled again. "Te quiero mucho, preciosa."
"Why don't you go through to the lounge and I'll heat up your dinner for you?" You suggest, watching as Alexia nods wordlessly and leaves the room.
Seeing her like this, it's unexplainably difficult. You know there is not much you can say that'll make a difference to how she feels right now, it's something Alexia has to work through on her own, a classic case of time heals all, but that acknowledgement doesn't soften the blow at all. However, you hope that spending time with you and Anaís will make her feel a little better before the night is over.
You get a hint of that when you walk into the lounge a few minutes later; Alexia is sat stiffly upright against the sofa, the uncomfortable position of her contrasted by her closed eyes as Anaís lay across her shoulder. Alexia had her face turned to the side into Anaís, and under the dim light of the room, lit up only by a lamp in the corner, you notice a stream of tears running down her cheek.
Wasting no time, you put the plate you were holding down onto the coffee table before sitting down beside them both. Careful not to disrupt the peace either of them had created, you wrap an arm around Alexia's shoulders and press a gentle kiss to her jaw. The midfielder shifts slightly so that she's leaning against you, keeping Anaís in place as you raise a hand to brush her tears away.
"Okay?" You whisper, resting your head against hers.
"Mhm." Her voice cracks slightly even as she hums, so you hug her a little tighter.
All three of you settle into silence, comforted by the sound of Anaís snoring lightly. Nothing needs to be said, nor could you think of anything, so you allow Alexia this moment to decompress from the day, wanting nothing more than for her to feel better. It doesn't matter to you how she gets there, whether that's by staying on this sofa all night long with you and Anaís, or forgetting to eat her dinner in front of her, whatever it takes you'll let her do. Because you think the world of her, and when she's feeling down, it offsets everything around you.
Until, some time later, Alexia breaks the silence with a sentiment that causes you to tear up too.
"I wish I could stay here forever."
She spoke so quietly, you would have missed it if you weren't waiting for it.
"Here, with you and with Anaís. Nobody watching us, no one asking anything from us. Just us three." It was clear from the tone of her voice that she's getting a bit teary again, and it tugs at every one of your heart strings. "Nothing can match this. I never want to do anything else again."
"Ale." You sigh shakily, suppressing cries of your own as her shoulders shake with silent sobs.
In her mind, she had to be completely silent, because if she woke up Anaís now, you don't even want to think about what her mind would tell her. It would be lethal. She couldn't handle failing at another thing, couldn't handle disappointing the two people she loved most.
"Go put her to bed before I wake her."
"Are you sure?" She nodded and shifted away from you.
"Don't want to wake her up."
With that, you stand up and watch Alexia place a final kiss to Anaís' forehead before she gives her to you. You move as quickly as possible without waking your daughter up, delicately placing her down in the crib in her room and grimacing as you do so in case she wakes up with a cry, but the universe must be on your side today because she stays asleep. A relieved sigh escapes you as you flick on the baby monitor, grabbing one of them and leaving the room. Heading back downstairs, you cautiously make your way back to the living room, not really sure what sight you'll walk into.
What you see is equally as heartbreaking as every time you'd looked at Alexia this evening.
She's seated in the same position as before, but this time her head is thrown back against the cushions of the sofa, and her face is completely stoic and devoid of emotion. The exception that gave her away were the stuttered breaths coming from her and the damp lines down her cheeks.
You join her again, wrapping both arms around her this time and pulling her fully into you. One of her hands comes up to grip your upper arm as she cries a little harder into your shoulder.
"We both love you, Alexia, so much. Please don't forget that." You remind her, stroking up and down her back as you embrace her. "You're more than good enough for us, no matter what your mind is telling you."
That seems to hit a sensitive point for her, because she only sobs harder into you. The only thing you can do now is be there for her, so you decide against speaking anymore to wait for her outburst of emotions to simmer down.
It takes longer than you expect, but eventually it does happen, and she falls quiet again whilst slumped against you. Casting your mind back through the years with her, you can't recall a time seeing Alexia as distraught as she was tonight. So, at that revelation, you gently urge her head back up from your shoulder and properly look at her. With your hands on either one of her cheeks, you lean in to press the softest kiss of mankind onto her forehead. It pulls more tears out of her, the tenderness of it, but her shoulders aren't wracking with sobs and her breathing is almost entirely normal.
"What's going on?" You question, gazing up into her normally piercing eyes, but tonight they were half-lidded and filled with defeat.
"No sé." She rasped. Her mind is way too convoluted to unravel everything going on at the moment, so she finds the words to say and pieces them together. "Not tonight. Please."
"Okay, that's okay. We don't have to." You reassure her, and you can see the relief flood her as her body deflates. "Can I talk though? I have some things to say."
"Sí." She shrugged, taking one of your hands with both of hers and fiddling with the rings you wore.
"Hey, you gotta look at me." You demand softly, tilting her chin up. You meet her eyes and smile a little, an act that rids her mind of one of the dark clouds over her. "I don't care how soppy and cliché this is, but meeting you is the best thing that has ever happened to me."
Alexia chuckles at that, something she's done thousands of times in front of you, but this one perhaps means the most.
"That is cliché." She comments, grinning half-heartedly when you roll your eyes.
"I already said it was, you can't claim that one. Let me finish." You push her shoulder lightly before composing yourself again. "You are the only person I want, Ale, and you mean so much to me. I can't even put it into words, so that's all you're getting for that part."
She laughs again, this time a little more tearfully as your loving words are fighting off all her doubts.
"To Anaís and I, it doesn't matter how many goals you get in a game or how many trophies you get in a season. I just want my Ale to be happy, and Anaís just wants her Mami to be happy. We will love you no matter what, and I'll be here as I am now to remind you, and Anaís will remind you the next time she's sick from you making her laugh." Alexia shakes her head at the reminder of an incident she had certainly learnt her lesson from a few months ago, the pair of you laughing quietly about it again. "You've seen the way Anaís looks at you. She's infatuated with you, Ale. And it's possibly my favourite thing in the world."
She sniffles a few times but nevertheless nods when you finish talking, feeling indefinitely better than she did when she got home. Raising your hand, she lightly kisses your ring finger before leaning forward to envelope you in a tight hug. It's an embrace that conveys all the words she can't verbalise right now, something you instantly understand as you know the woman in your arms better than she knows herself at this point.
"You're all we both will ever need. You just need to remember that more often."
There was a conversation that you and Alexia had had during the time you were trying to get pregnant, one that all same-sex couples most likely have at that stage. But it was resolved fairly quickly, and that was that you would be Mama and Alexia would be Mami. Ever since then, you and Alexia had endlessly teased and bantered each other about what Anaís would say first out of the two options.
What you weren't expecting though, was Alexia's reaction when Anaís eventually did say her first word.
Anaís bellowed her first word at you one random morning when you walked into her room where she sat waiting for her parents in her crib. Alexia was a few steps behind where you froze in place, overcome with about every emotion one could name at the fact Anaís had not only spoken, but said Mama too.
Alexia's excitement kicked in immediately, so she skipped over to Anaís' crib and picked her up, holding her in the air and grinning up at her.
"What did you just say, chiqui? Did you say... Mama?"
"Mama!" Anaís squealed loudly, giggling when Alexia rewarded her with a barrage of kisses.
You were still stuck in place, the only difference was that there were now tears of joy dripping onto the carpet by your feet. Alexia turned with your daughter in her arms, laughing when she brought her over to you.
"Hola, Mama! Let's wipe these tears, right Anaís?" She takes one of Anaís' hands and uses it to brush the tears off of your face. "Say the magic word, nena! Mama!"
"Mamaaaa." She shouts and to add to the sentiment of the moment, she points right at you as she says it, indicating that she does actually know what she's saying.
"Yes, well done! Oh, we are so proud of you, chiqui, aren't we?" You nod and cover your face with your hands, curling into Alexia's side. It's a struggle for her to hug you whilst also holding a wiggly Anaís who is always giddy in the morning, but she makes it work. "Sí, we are, Anaís. Mama, are you okay?"
"Yes, yes, perfect. I just can't believe she said it." You sniffle, removing your hands from your face but staying at Alexia's side.
Anaís grins as you reach out to cup her cheek, turning her head to blow raspberries against your hand. The three of you laugh together, you and Alexia forever enraptured by every display of Anaís' ever growing personality.
"I always knew she would say Mama first and I'm so glad she did." Alexia admits, chuckling at the confused face you pull.
"Why?" You wonder, leaning forward to kiss the tip of Anaís' nose.
"Because you deserve it. You did all the hard work with her, being pregnant and then giving birth like a campeona, and you do a great job being her Mama. It was only right for her to say it first."
You had no idea she felt such a way about the situation, and it only caused you to get emotional again. It wasn't that Alexia never voiced her gratitude towards you, she did it daily, it's just that hearing her speak so highly of you as a parent meant far more to you than you could ever voice.
"Thank you, Ale. That's unbelievably sweet of you to say." You giggle, thumbing away a few tears and leaning your head against her shoulder.
"Buena, it's the truth. Oye, Anaís?" Alexia calls back Anaís' attention, smirking when her daughter looks up at her. She raises her eyebrows expectantly, waiting for her to say the inevitable. "Ma..."
"Mama!" Anaís grins at you again, jerking forwards towards you.
"Woah!" You catch her, holding her tight against you in a loving hug. "You are crazy, Anaís."
The little girl seems surprisingly outraged at that as starts to babble away unabashedly in your arms, her hands gesturing wildly as she did so, a trait she'd clearly picked up from her Mami. You giggle at her unintelligible ramble, blushing when Alexia randomly places an affectionate kiss on your cheek.
"Loca como su Mama, amor!" Alexia comments with a poke at Anaís' leg. "She even loves chattering away like you."
"Sí, nuestra paralanchina pequeña."
You tickle Anaís' tummy, interrupting her ramble. She turns to you with an angry face that is scarily similar to Alexia's, and the pair of you have to stifle your laughter at the sight of it out of fear of whatever terrible consequences she'd release upon you both.
"Enojada como su Mama también." Alexia mutters.
It's your turn to fix her with a warning glance. She instantly backs down with her hands up in surrender, stepping away from the fury running through the veins of her two favourite girls.
"Mama?" Anaís turns back to you with a questioning glance, and you take advantage of that.
"Sí, Anaís, Mami needs to run away right now, doesn't she?" You smile politely at your daughter, one she returns, before you both look back to Alexia with those menacing grins. A second passes before she sprints out the room. Anaís laughs and you chuckle too, walking out of the room in a much calmer fashion.
If there was one thing you'd learnt about parenting so far, it was that you should never take things for granted. There's a seemingly infinite number of firsts in a person's life and being there to witness them all as a parent was an experience that couldn't be conformed to a few measly adjectives. Sure, you would hear Anaís say 'Mama' countless times in your life, but you wouldn't ever get to hear it for the first time again. Sometimes, when you thought about that, you were consumed by sorrow, but that was part and parcel of parenthood. No matter how harrowing it was, you had no choice but to accept it.
The thing that easily made up for it was spending the rest of your life as a parent to Anaís, and in the grand scheme of things, that was the biggest privilege you could ever have.
Not so long after the beautiful experience that was Anaís' saying her first word, she turned a whole year old. One year of having a little plus one with you everywhere you went, one year of seeing the woman you love grow into an amazing parent, one whole year of nothing but the absolute best memories you've ever had the honour experiencing. To say it had been the best twelve months of your life was a complete understatement.
Obviously due to your work and Alexia's games, you had a very low-key day between yourselves on her actual birthday, and 'day' was a generous word. It was more of a frantic celebration because of course Anaís chose her birthday to be the day she had her first ever lie-in. When she finally woke up, it meant you only had less than an hour to spend as a family before Alexia had to leave for training which doubled into media day that she couldn't avoid. Fortunately, the team had organised it so that she was first so she could get home as soon as possible, but she had still grumbled about it everyday since it was arranged.
The short hour was enjoyable nevertheless, if not a little emotional, and you practically had to push Alexia out of the door so that she wasn't late. You understood her defiance, knowing that if you were in her shoes you would be wrecked at having to be away from Anaís on her birthday, but it was only for a few hours and that was enough persuasion for her to go.
When she did return, she hardly let Anaís out of her sight. That was until her closest family and childhood friends came over for a calm dinner to celebrate your daughter. It was turning out that Anaís was quite the social butterfly, so she was happy to be passed around all evening to the ones you and Alexia loved most. The day completely exhausted her though, and that night you and Alexia spent far longer than normal stood over her where she slept in her crib.
The midfielder was behind you with her arms around your torso, her chin on your shoulder as you both gazed at your daughter's sleeping form. This time a year ago, you were in a hospital bed with a tiny, wrinkly baby in your arms as Alexia lay beside you. Now, a year on, that little newborn had completely grown into her own and was fast on her way to walking. It was a bittersweet contrast for sure, but you were well adjusted to how fast time moves and how to accept things, so it didn't plague you in the same way things had in the past.
To Alexia, not that she had made you aware yet, this day wasn't just about Anaís, but you too. Because a year ago today, she had graced her eyes upon the greatest wonder in the world, and that was all down to you. You, who had gone through agonising pain for much longer than just the time you were in labour, and managed to deliver her daughter perfectly healthy. Never would she take that for granted, and she had a little trick up her sleeve to make sure you knew that.
"Amor, come to the lounge with me." She whispered, pairing it with a kiss to your bare shoulder beside your vest strap.
After a last moment of admiration, you nodded and allowed her to lead you to the living room, your hand in hers as you trailed after her. When you got there, she urged you to sit right in the middle of the sofa in front of the TV before she walked off to grab her laptop. She came back in a few moments later and turned the TV on, then mirroring her laptop screen to show up on the bigger screen. You watched it all with a curious frown, none the wiser to what you were about to see.
"I wanted to make something for us to remember the past year by." Alexia said, pausing as she searched for the right file. "It is also a gift from me to you because we should celebrate you too today. You gave birth to our little girl, and that is no easy feat. So this is just a small way for me to express my gratitude to you since words will never do you justice."
You'd be lying if you said your heart wasn't beating about a hundred miles an hour by now. Alexia hadn't even shown you what she had organised yet, but you had an inkling that in a few moment's time you would be emotionally ruined.
Alexia pressed play on the video she had pulled up and came to sit beside you. Before the first image had even come on, it was still just a black screen, you scrambled to find her hand and clutched it tightly in your lap.
In the next couple minutes, numerous photos and videos of your little family of three were displayed on the screen, a compilation of all the best documented moments captured within the last year. Some of them were taken by you obviously, but the larger majority of them were from Alexia's point of view and you had a sneaky feeling that was the point of it. A lot of the things in the montage you hadn't even seen, like the video of you singing a Spanish nursery rhyme to Anaís one night when she was still a newborn, or the picture of you fast asleep with Anaís on your chest with two fistfuls of your t-shirt, and way more of the same value that had you crying almost instantly.
Next to you, Alexia had a pensive look on her face, anxious as to what your thoughts were. Obviously she noticed you were crying, but she stayed unmoving until the video ended and you reacted first.
And due to a lack of better words in the moment, you accidentally give Alexia a momentary heart attack...
"Alexia, what the hell?" You cried, one hand over your eyes. The Spaniard froze beside you because out of all the thing she expected you to say, that was not one of them.
"Did you not like it?" She asked in an insecure voice, to which you turned to her in shock.
"No, I loved it, Ale." You told her, and she left out perhaps the biggest sigh of relief you had ever seen someone do. "Why did you do it though?"
"Because I just appreciate you so much, amor, and I need you to know that. Seeing you and watching you with Anaís is a magical thing to witness and I wanted you to see it through my eyes. It is the greatest honour of my life, being able to love you both. The second greatest honour is being alive to witness you with her." She explained earnestly, her free hand that wasn't held by yours coming to cradle your face. You leaned into it immediately, the image of you with your head tilted to the side with a soft pout and tears on your cheeks drove Alexia crazy. "Look at you! I can't get enough of you, you make me go crazy."
With a wet laugh, you raised a hand up to rest on the back of hers on your face and turned to kiss her palm.
"You drive me crazy with your grand gestures like you just did! You need to tell me who made that for you so that I can get them to do one for your Christmas present." You say, Alexia chuckling and shaking her head.
She manoeuvres you so that you're sat on her lap with your back to her chest, and she hugs you tighter than ever like that.
"You see what I see now?" She murmurs into your ear, and you're unsure if the hand that settles over your stomach is a subtle hint.
"What's that?" You wonder innocently, leaning your head back to rest against her shoulder. With you like that, she turns to place a few gentle kisses to the new skin on show.
"I see the most incredible, beautiful, and caring Mami in the world. One that loves so whole-heartedly, you leave an imprint on everyone you come across. When I first met you and I fell victim to that effect, I knew I had to have you. But I had no idea quite the impact you would have on my life. I find myself doing the stupidest things in the world just so I hear two people laugh." She huffs, grinning when she hears you giggle. "I also find myself loving the two most amazing people on the planet. These two people happen to love me too, and I have to think of myself as the luckiest person in the world to say that. My fortune far precedes my most ambitious dreams, because with you and Anaís in my life, what more could I want?"
Oh, what a fool you would be to deny her of that.
Later that same summer came the World Cup, and this time around it was held in Brazil. If it wasn't for Anaís, you would have of course tried to get over there for at least one of Alexia's games. But that would be too challenging and complicated to do with a one year old, so Alexia didn't even blink twice when you fearfully brought up that fact to her on one of the last nights you would spend with her before the summer turn of games started.
Before Alexia left though, you had a small present in store for her. The morning of the day she would be leaving, you were adamant at being the one to dress Anaís because there was a vital piece of her outfit that she needed to wear.
That key item was a Spain jersey of course, with Mami 11 printed on the back. So when you walked into the kitchen where Alexia ate her breakfast, she gave you a funny look at the weird way you were carrying Anaís. But that look was wiped off her face when you place Anaís on the ground for her to walk over to Alexia. The midfielder's jaw dropped as she noticed her daughter's shirt, but it wasn't until she spotted the detail on the back that she was overcome with emotion.
"Amor, you did this?" Alexia asked, abandoning her breakfast as she crouched down and held her arms out for a wobbly Anaís to wander over to her.
"I did." You replied proudly, watching as Alexia hugged her daughter tightly before turning her around so she could get a good look at her jersey.
"Dios mío, pingüino. Look at you." Alexia whispers in amazement, then she picks up Anaís and walks over for a family hug. "Thank you, thank you. That's amazing."
And of course, for every one of Spain's matches that tournament, you and Anaís were watching with your jerseys on in full support for Alexia. Before each game, you would take a photo of you both and send it to Alexia, which she told you was what empowered her to walk out onto the pitch for every game. You and your daughter missed Alexia of course, but it was much harder for her since she was halfway across the world from her family.
It was that much harder when her team were knocked out of the tournament in the semi-finals.
...But, when she arrived back to her hotel room later that night after that dreadful game, she sensed a spark of her excitement in her chest, because the loss meant she could come home. It meant she could finally see you and Anaís after what felt like a lifetime apart, and she focused all of her energy on that eagerness she felt instead of the effects of the defeat.
And the reunion was so worth it, because this time you and Anaís did greet her with a sign at the airpot this time, and the Spaniard all but collapsed into the arms of you both when she saw you.
You thought the biggest shock of your summer would be Spain getting knocked out in the semi-finals, but unbeknownst to you, there was a whole other storm coming.
After the World Cup, Alexia whisked you and Anaís away on a holiday to escape from the world and spend time together as a family without the pressures of life. But when you were lounging on one of the outdoor beds on the balcony of your hotel room one day of the holiday, you heard a statement you were not expecting.
"I'm going to retire from the national team."
Alexia was wandering aimlessly around the balcony, trying to bounce Anaís to sleep for her mid-day nap when she had said it.
"What?" You sat up and raised your sunglasses to look at her properly, wondering if you there was a chance you had heat stroke and may had hallucinated it.
"I said I am retiring from the national team." She repeated nonchalantly, as if she hadn't just revealed huge news.
"I'm not quite sure we're on the same page, Ale. Could you explain a little?"
With a chuckle, Alexia tugs Anaís' hat further down so that it blocks the sun from her eyes when Alexia sits on the edge of your sun bed.
"I have decided to step down from the national team, for good. I have much more interesting things to do with my time now." She shrugged, glancing down at her daughter. "When we get back from vacation, I have a meeting with the federation to tell them. Nobody knows, it's a decision I made for myself."
"Are you sure?" You're a bit speechless, caught off guard by the sudden admission.
"Very sure. I'm certain that this is what I want to do. I'm content with everything I've achieved for the team, so now is my time. I'm not ready to retire fully, that's a while off yet, but I don't want to spend so long away from you both again. It's just not worth it. I'm not missing that much of Anaís' life again." Alexia explains.
You take a moment to process the sudden declaration, before you lean forward to wrap an arm around her and hugging her carefully, mindful of Anaís in between you both.
"Well, I guess that's that. As long as you're sure, Ale, then there's not much to say. I'm grateful you've made that decision, who would I be to get upset at the fact we're going to have more time together?" You say, noticing the relieved smile on her face. "You don't want to, I don't know, discuss it a bit more? With anyone, doesn't have to be me. I just don't want you to regret it."
"No, I'm completely okay with it, amor. I think I had already made this decision before Brazil. It was something I needed to figure out on my own, and I have had long enough to process it and now I'm fine with it. I think I am actually excited."
Now that she mentions it, she does have a lighter look in her eyes, like this is a weight off of her shoulders. She had come back from the tournament with that look, and it irritated you that you couldn't figure it out at first, but now you completely understood it. You smile at her, filled from head to toe with pride and love for the woman in front of you, and you lean forward to kiss her softly.
"I'm happy to hear that." You whisper, and she can't help but lean back for more.
One more thing about parenthood to add to the list, was that children had the worst timing in the world.
"Oh no. Ay dios. I'm sorry, amor, I would really love to continue this but I need to go change her diaper right now."
Before you could open your eyes, Alexia was scurrying off into the hotel room, and you didn't even want to know what had just happened.
There soon came to be a very special occasion for Alexia, one she had been dreaming of for as long as she could remember. For some time now, you and Alexia had had multiple discussions about when Anaís would go to her first game, and finally the pair of you had landed on an option.
Barcelona were due to play in the final of the Super Cup in Madrid, and you, Anaís, and other members of Alexia's family were travelling to attend the game. You were beyond excited for it; since Anaís had come into your life, you had hardly been to many of Alexia's games, something you adored doing before you had a child to care for.
Alexia, on the other hand, was encumbered by nerves as she lined up in the tunnel for the game. She can't remember the last time she had been nervous for a match, so she didn't really know what to do with herself. For the few minutes she was in the tunnel, her mind was almost in overdrive - would Anaís be okay? You and her family were there for her, she had to be. Would she kick up a fuss? She was still only young after all. Would she hate the amount of people there and the noise of it all? Well, that one couldn't be possible because Alexia had bought some baby ear defenders that she demanded you pack, so at least there was one surefire solution. She couldn't spiral for any longer though because Cata shoved her from behind when the captain didn't move.
The game went off without a hitch, and when Alexia did her pre-match tradition as she hopped onto the pitch, her mind clicked into concentration. That didn't stop her from glancing up at the section of the stadium she knew her family was in though, desperate to catch a glimpse of her daughter. She finally did spot you both as she was walking off the pitch at half-time, almost melting on the spot when she saw you holding Anaís who of course wore a Barcelona jersey on top of her jumper so that she stayed warm. With an eager wave, she admired the view for a bit longer, before jogging off to the tunnel.
She was glad to find that her nerves didn't affect her performance, bagging two assists to help the team win 3-1. It was a great match to watch as a fan, and you were thrilled for Alexia and her team, and the cherry on the cake was the fact that Anaís had been no trouble at all throughout it. For about twenty minutes of the first half, she fell asleep, but was startled awake by the crowd (and you) when Barcelona scored their first goal. Since then, she had been wide awake, and as good as gold.
From your place in the stands, you watched on with pride as the trophy ceremony carried out, forever happy to see Alexia with a medal around her neck and a trophy in her arms.
But perhaps the most exciting moment of the day for Alexia was when you walked out of the tunnel a little while later with Anaís in your arms. Alexia ran over as soon as she spotted you, knowing this was the plan all along if Anaís had coped well. She laughed giddily as she approached you and wrapped you both up in a tight hug, flooded with pure happiness.
"Well done, Mami!" You grin, patting her cheek a few times before offering Anaís out to her.
"Mami!" Anaís shouted in Alexia's face, before her attention inevitably falls to the shiny metal hanging from her neck, She tries to pick it up, but it's a little heavy for her, meaning it thumps Alexia heavily in the chest.
"Oof, Anaís." Alexia huffs, taking off her medal and putting it around your neck instead.
"Ale." You roll your eyes, cheeks slightly red, and when you try to take it off her hand reaches out to stop it.
"Leave it, amor." She smirks, kissing you quickly as you go to argue again. Leaving you a tad flustered, she turns back to her daughter. "Oye, Anaís! What's that?"
The midfielder points to one of the footballs off at the side of the pitch, and Anaís' face immediately lights up.
"Ball!" She grins, reaching a grabby hand out towards it.
"You want to play?" Alexia wonders, going over to collect the ball and walking it further onto the field before placing Anaís down in front of it. "Kick it, chiqui!"
Rather unceremoniously, Anaís does kick it but not without falling afterwards. You laugh as she tumbles down, Alexia rushing over and doting on her.
"Ale, she'll be okay, don't stress her out." You tell her, to which she nods and rights her daughter again before coming back to your side. "She doesn't quite have your elegance yet."
"I know." Alexia snickers, and the pair of you follow to wherever Anaís toddles off to. "Look at her go though. Not really a waddling little pingüino anymore."
The nickname, 'pingüino', had come about back when Anaís took her first steps just after she turned a year old, and it had stuck since then.
"No, she isn't." You hum in agreement, throwing an arm around Alexia's waist as you continue trailing after your little girl. "Uh oh."
There wasn't any real danger when you uttered that, it was just Mapi.
"Hola nena! Wow, look at you!" Mapi ran over to her and swooped her up off the ground. "What name do you have on your back... oh, boo! Boring! I think you should have my name, sí Ale?"
"Over my dead body." Alexia grumbled, elbowing you when you laughed at her grumpiness. "That is an emergency shirt, we didn't have time for a name because we didn't realise her other one was too small for her jumper."
"Blah, blah, blah... no wonder you are always sleepy, Anaís, her talking is tiring me too!" Mapi teased, wincing dramatically at the disapproving huff Alexia gives. "Oh no, nena. We need to run. Let's go play before Mami kills me, huh?"
You shake your head at Mapi's antics and watch as she steals your daughter away to play football with her. Alexia has a subtle smile on her face, and you giggle quietly when you see it, knowing she's trying to act like the captain she is but can't resist the cuteness of her daughter.
"Cálmate, Capi." You bump your hip into hers, smirking when she looks down at you with a suppressed grin. Now you take the medal off and place it back around her neck, silencing her complaints in the same way she did to you earlier. "You have too many medals and trophies now, campeona, I'm not sure our house can stand the extra weight."
"Behave." Alexia muttered lovingly, pulling you in for a proper hug. "Thank you for coming, and thank you for bringing her too."
"Of course. I loved being at a game again, and Anaís handled it perfectly. She had a little nap in the first half but stayed awake for the rest of it."
"Really?" Alexia said, her eyebrows shooting up in surprise as her face contorted to one of shy excitement, an adorable sight to see.
"Yes, she did. She didn't cry once, she was very settled." Alexia nodded and casted her eyes back over to Anaís. "Told you she would love going to your games."
At that, she finally lets herself break out into a whole-hearted grin, and she hugs you tight to her side as you watch Mapi and a few others dote over Anaís.
"I need her at every game. She is my good luck charm." She mumbles, swallowing down the lump in her throat. "Mapi is going to injure our mija."
She wasn't exactly wrong on that part; Mapi had started passing the ball softly to Anaís and urging her to kick it, to which she did but not without falling over again. The defender can't help herself: she passes Anaís the ball over and over, and Anaís tumbles down each time. Mapi would burst out laughing, before helping Anaís up and giving her the ball once more. Luckily Anaís saw the humour in it too, giggling almost just as much as Mapi.
Alexia let it happen once more before marching over. You were a little out of earshot, but you saw Alexia pick Anaís up from the floor and brush off the grass from her clothes, then she turned to Mapi with an accusing point and most likely the sternest voice she could muster. From your viewpoint, you could tell Mapi was stifling yet more laughter, but she kept up the innocent act in front of her friend. And when Alexia turned away from her with a shake of her head, Mapi looked over at you with a huge grin that you matched, letting her know she wasn't actually in trouble like Alexia tried to establish.
"That woman is the bane of my life." Alexia complained when she came back over to you, a slightly damp and grassy child in her arms.
"Mm, you love her really." You retaliate, flicking a blade of grass off of Anaís' arm.
"So what." Alexia huffed, cradling Anaís closely to her chest and swaying a little. "Oh, dios. She's so grown up."
"I know." You pout at the sight of Anaís in her arms, now calm and a bit tired. "Already kicking a ball about."
"We must buy her some football boots soon." You shake your head and laugh.
"She's not even two years old yet."
"Doesn't matter, amor. Project Putellas starts now."
The night before Anaís' second birthday was a turning point to remember; you and Alexia, in the spur of the moment, agreed on having another child in the very near future. When she initiated the decision, you hadn't even hesitated to affirm your willingness to her. It was an easy choice for you because both of you had always wanted two children, but in the past two years the topic of making that happen had hardly been brought up. You knew the time would come, and now it was here.
For the rest of the time you spent preparing the cake for it to go in the oven, the pair of you revelled in the coy anticipation that lingered in the air. Separately, your minds were running wild with the limitless possibilities that could occur in the next few years, until you stood up from placing the tray in the oven and Alexia was there, gazing at you with the softest smile she could muster.
"Another baby, huh?" She commented quietly, taking hold of your hand.
"Apparently so." You matched her smile, both of you watching the other before Alexia pulled you in for a tight hug. "You sure?"
"Amor, que pregunta tan estupida." She said bluntly, making you laugh. "I have never been so sure of a decision before. I believe now is the time for us to have another, as long as you are sure."
"Oh, what a stupid thing to say." You teased her, grinning when she grumbled and lightly hit your waist. "I'm more than ready to have another."
"Hm, good." She smirks, and her hands travel a little lower on your back. "We can go try if you'd like?"
"Really?" You scoffed, swatting her hands away and stepping out of her grasp. "Come on. Help me make this icing. And don't make any inappropriate suggestions."
From that day on, the pair of you delve yourselves into the process of IVF again. After last time, you both were more than happy with it all and how the process goes, so you chose the reciprocal type again and were there for each other through it all once again. It was a little trickier trying to do injections with an investigative toddler who wanted to be involved with it too, never straying far from you two, but you made it work.
However, not all things can go to plan. Perhaps the first time with Anaís had been too good to be true, because conceiving this time was much more difficult.
Over and over, yours and Alexia's emotions were tugged from left to right, one day on cloud nine and other days plunged into the deepest melancholia. It was a ruthless and relentless cycle of hope, anticipation, disappointment and frustration. Your self-worth took a gut-wrenching blow each time, your mind overgrown with blame and guilt and inadequacy. But, as someone wise beyond their years once said, your fortune far preceded your hopes because each and everytime Alexia and Anaís were there to pull you back up out of your pit of darkness.
"Amor." Alexia whispered gently one morning, sitting beside where you lay in bed and placing Anaís in her lap. "Wake up, mija, it is a big day, we need y-"
"Mama! Up, now!" Anaís shouted, pushing against your shoulder.
"Anaís, no! That is not nice, I told you to be gentle. Gentle, sí?" Alexia scolds quietly, about to warn Anaís again when you rolled over with a tight-lipped smile on your face.
"Morning." You muttered, bracing yourself when you saw Anaís stand in Alexia's lap. "Oof, chiqui, good morning to you too."
"Feliz navidad, mis amores." Alexia said, resting a hand on Anaís' back as a reminder for her to stay calm.
"Christmas, Mama." Anaís grinned down at you, placing two heavy hands on your cheeks, smushing them together, and giving you a quick kiss.
"Mhm, happy Christmas, bebíta." You sat up and gave her a hug that lasted about a millisecond due to her very limited attention span.
"Anaís, why don't you go get your stocking from your room? We will open it in here." She didn't need to be told twice - she leaped off the bed, briefly scaring the life out of you and Alexia, before racing out of the room. Alexia turned to you when she left, looking over you with a watcful eye. "How are you, amor?"
The previous day, cruelly on Christmas Eve, you both had found out that the third IVF attempt had not resulted in a pregnancy. What should have been a day filled with fesitivies and joy and tradition, was instead another day of grieving. After you had gotten home from the appointment, Alexia had quickly dropped Anaís off at Eli's for the afternoon so that her full attention could be on you. Not much was said or done, this had occurred one too many times now for any words to be of gratification. You both just needed time together, away from any other worries, to be able to process it. The healing process wasn't a straightforward one, you didn't magically feel better this morning, but knowing what day it was made it just a tad easier.
"Not bad, but not great. I just don't want to think about it. For one day at least." You answered, and she nodded instantly.
"We can do our best. When that little rocket is around, I think we'll be swept off our feet." Alexia said, glad to hear even just the breath of laughter you give her. "Don't hesitate to tell me if you need a break though. You let me know how you're doing, alright?"
"I will. Thank you, Ale." You told her earnestly, offering a semi-genuine smile to her.
"Te amo mucho, siempre. Siempre, amor." Alexia whispered when she wrapped you up in her arms.
Then Anaís came steaming back in, her Christmas stocking dragging along behind her unceremoniously, and you giggle when Alexia tells her off for it. The little girl sassed back a reply and Alexia can't help but laugh too, helping her lift it onto the bed. Watching your daughter's face light up with every gift she opens and how she hugs you both tightly after every single one, it's hard to be enveloped by the gloom your mind tried to subdue you into. Anaís was the best gift of all, and if a second child wasn't meant to be, you still had this beautiful girl that made you numb to all the problems life threw at you.
In the midst of this ongoing IVF journey came Alexia's birthday, and to distract yourself from the difficulty of the past few months, you had set yourself and Anaís a project to do as a gift. It was a minor token of appreciation for the woman who had been nothing short of perfect throughout it all, forever there to lean on and pick up the pieces when you need her to.
The day had come for you both to show off what you'd done for her, and though you'd already spent the morning at home with Anaís and Alexia, as well as giving her a few other gifts, this was the part you were most looking forward to. And as you pulled up to the Barcelona training facilities where you would see your hard work for the first time before surprising her, it was safe to say you hadn't felt such excitement in a long while.
"So, frecas, are you ready to surprise Mami?" You smile at Anaís through the rearview mirror of your car just as you pull into a parking space.
"Mamiiii!" Anaís sings from her seat, her little feet swinging excitedly.
"Sí, Mami!" You repeat back, turning off the car before hopping out and walking to Anaís' door. "Vale, mi niña pequeña, what do we have to remember whilst we're here?"
"Be nice, hold your hand, and... smile!"
You laugh at that last one, because you and Alexia never have to remind her to smile as it's something she is always doing anyway. The pair of you love to tell her how happy she makes everyone around her with her cheeky smile, and from then she'd taken it upon herself to do it, somehow, even more often.
"Yes, everybody loves it when you smile." You tap her nose lightly, delighted to hear her giggle. "Do you remember how today is going to go?"
"Tell me?" Anaís asks as you help her out of the car.
"Yep, I can tell you." You reply, taking her hand and leading her to the reception. "We're going to be taken to an office where we can finally see the gift you made for Mami. Then we can give it to her, and maybe if you're up for it, we can have lunch with everybody. Are you excited?"
"Mhm." Anaís mutters quietly, indicating she was feeling a little uncertain about something. When you're away from the car park and outside the main doors, you turn to her and crouch to her height.
"What's up, mi chiqui? Is there something bugging you?" You question softly, taking both of her hands and squeezing them.
"Nervous." She admits, shuffling forward in a silent plea for a hug, which you immediately engage in.
"It's okay to be nervous, isn't it? Mami and I get nervous still and we're old." You joke, hearing her giggle slightly into your shoulder. "What's making you nervous?"
"The people." Anaís tells you, to which you nod understandingly.
"That's alright, thank you for telling me. There might be a lot of people today, most of them you will know though. They're all Mami's friends, aren't they?" She nods shyly when you move back to look at her face. "They are. You just stick with me and Mami when we see her, we've got you. Always. And if you don't want to stay for dinner, let me know and we can go home. Okay?"
"Okay." She smiles brightly up at you, an image you wished you could treasure forever, and you lean forward to kiss her forehead.
"Perfecta, mi amor. Venga!" You take her hand again and press the buzzer to be let into the building. "Do you know what Mami says when she gets nervous?"
"Mami asks for your besitos!" Anaís answers with a grin, catching you off guard. The question was more of a rhetorical one, but you had underestimated your daughter's cheekiness.
"Well, she does, but that's not what I was going to say." You laugh, cheeks red, opening the doors when they unlock. "Mami says that most of the time she doesn't need to feel nervous because the thing she was worrying about is never as bad as she thinks. Do you understand?"
"No." Anaís shrugs bluntly, again making you laugh as you lead her into the reception.
"Okay, chiqui, forget I spoke." You say with a light eye roll, the small girl giggling to herself beside you.
Signing both of you in, you make small talk with the receptionist who hands you two name stickers. Anaís was currently in a phase where she just could not get enough of stickers, so you gasp excitedly for her.
"Pegatina?" She looks up at you with a giddy face, politely snatching the sticker from you and putting it in the center of her sweater.
"Sí!" You smile at her excitement, and an idea comes to mind. You turn back to the receptionist with a plan. "Existe alguna posibilidad de que tengas una hoja extra de pegatinas en blanco? Mi chiqui los adora."
"Claro! Aquí tienes." The lady smiles brightly at you and hands over a sheet of blank stickers. She waves at Anaís, who returns the gesture shyly before you turn to her and show off the item in your hand.
"Mirar, Anaís! More stickers!" Your daughter gasps loudly at the surprise, gazing up at you like you'd just given her the best gift in the world.
"Gracias, Mama!" She squeals, moving to hug your leg tightly.
"No problem, mija. You can draw on them at dinner if you'd like." You say, ducking down to kiss the top of her head. "I'll put them away for now, Mami finishes training soon so we need to go."
With Anaís' hand in yours, you lead her through the building and towards the meeting room you had been informed to go through. Nowadays you were more than familiar with your way around the facilities, having been here numerous times, but you can tell Anaís is still a bit apprehensive. And as a result of yours and Alexia's healthy parenting habits, she didn't hesitate to tell you again.
"Mama, I'm scared." She says, tugging on your hand and coming to a standstill outside the office just as you go to open it.
"Scared about what?" You frown, bending down again and brushing a few wisps of her out of her face.
"Mami will not like her gift."
That broke your heart, because you could already picture Alexia's reaction when she saw what Anaís had done for her. You made a bet with Eli and Alba that she would cry when she received the gift, something they instantly agreed with.
"Anaís, I promise you, Mami will love her present. I know she will, you don't need to worry or be scared. She will really love them. I pinky promise." You hold her hand out for her to link fingers with you, and after a moment of careful consideration, she nods and seals the promise.
"Ready now." She says confidently, so you smile and stand up again.
Knocking twice, you open the door to find a few members of staff there - a few from Barça and a few from the team you'd worked with at Nike. In the middle of the table was the box that contained the surprise, and Anaís' eyes widened so far they almost bugged out of her head.
"There, Mama." She said in a loud whisper, the others in the room smiling brightly at her excitement.
"There they are! Let's go sit down and look at them."
You lead her to the table and sit down in a middle seat, keeping Anaís on your lap. One of the Nike staff talks you through them briefly, giving you an update on the process, and the whole time Anaís bounces giddily. She was getting a little antsy and you figured it was a bit of an odd situation for her to be in; sat in a room with unfamiliar people, one holding a camera to film the day, all whilst the thing she'd been desperate to see for over a month sat waiting in the middle. Somehow she had managed to keep the whole thing a secret, Alexia to your knowledge none the wiser about the whole thing. There were nearly a few slip-ups, but so far so good.
"Okay, that's all I think. You can look at them now."
Anaís grins as you reach for the box and pull it closer, putting it within reach for her to open it.
"Go on, Anaís, you can look."
You watch her face rather than look at the gift at first, your heart clenching at the utter joy and awe on her face as she lifts the lid off of the box. She lets out an adorable gasp, reaching a hand out and delicately picking up one of the things in there.
"Mama... I love them." She states, turning to look at you and showing off the item in her hand.
"They are amazing, aren't they? They came out perfect, wow." You take the other one out from the box, examining it closely. "Mami will adore them."
"When is she coming?" Anaís wonders, and you look up to the Barça staff.
"Training will finish any second now. They'll text when she's on h-" His phone pings as he speaks. "Ah, she is on her way now."
"Great! Anaís, let's put these back in the box so Mami can open it for herself." Anaís nods eagerly and carefully puts them back in, before turning and hugging you unexpectedly. "Hey, what's this for?"
"Mami will love her gift. I know it!" She squeals, pulling back and placing a sloppy kiss to your cheek.
"Thank you for that! How lucky I am to have such a kind, cute little girl, huh?" You smile at her, leaning forward to kiss all over her face. She squeals again and hides herself in your shoulder, pressing kisses of her own to your shirt. "Do you remember what to say when Mami walks in?"
"Umm... felicidades?" Anaís says, and you nod proudly.
"Perfect! Bien, mi niña."
No less then five minutes later, you can hear footsteps and a familiar voice coming down the corridor.
"-are you making me do media without showering? It was hot today, I'm all swe-"
Alexia cuts herself when she opens the door to see you and Anaís there. It's a far better surprise than media.
"What are you two doing here?" She asks with a huge smile on her face, frozen in place at the door.
"Say it, Anaís." You whispered in your daughter's ear.
"Felicidades, Mami." Anaís says shyly, and Alexia bounds over to her to pick her up and hug her tightly.
"Thank you, princesa! What a lovely surprise!" She exclaims, looking over at you for a bit of context.
"We have a better surprise for you. Come sit down." You tell her, patting the chair next to you.
Everyone else in the room stands back and watches, and Alexia takes her seat with Anaís curled into her side. With a quick kiss to her forehead, she gestures to the box in front of her.
"This?" She wonders, and before you could get a word in, Anaís pipes up.
"Open it, Mami! It is the best gift ever!" She urges, patting her leg to try and hurry her up.
"Alright, alright. Cheeky." Alexia tuts jokingly, reaching around Anaís to flick the lid open. Her jaw drops when she looks inside, and of all things in the world, she wasn't expecting them.
Inside, were two completely customised football boots, designed by Anaís with help from you and a team at Nike.
The design of the boots were fairly similar, except for a few tiny details that were special to each one. They were mainly white, and on each toe end of the boots were Anaís' hand prints in the blaugrana colours. Under the Nike tick on the outside of each boot were Anaís' initials with a penguin beside them. Additionally, under the logo on the inside of the boots were the words 'Vamos Mami' written in Anaís' squiggly handwriting. Every single detail, from the heartwarmingly poor stick figure drawing of Alexia on the back of the boots with the words 'My Hero' beside them, to the one of Alexia's favourite flowers and the other little contextual family inclusions, sent her into an emotional frenzy.
They were obviously majoritively designed by a small child, Anaís, but that was what made them so very special to Alexia. To her, they were probably the best gift she could've received purely based off of the sentimental value of them, and she had had tears in her eyes the moment she saw them.
"Anaís... wow." Alexia choked out, hastily wiping away one that slipped out. "You made these?"
"I did! Me and Mama!" Anaís claimed proudly, grinning up at Alexia and helping her to brush her tears away. But the sight of her crying confused her, and her smile quickly turned into a frown. "Oh. Not happy?"
"No, no, I'm so happy, Anaís, so happy. I love them so much that I'm crying, how silly?" Anaís giggled at her Mami, and the whole thing to you was ineffably adorable. "Oh wow. I really love them."
"Can you wear them for your games?" Anaís wonders.
"Well, I will, but only for my most important games. I don't want to ruin them and get them all muddy."
"We have a replica pair at home so you don't need to worry about that." You tell her, and she reaches over to take your hand, squeezing it gratefully.
"Thank you both. You really thought of everything." She shakes her head and sighs shakily, unable to tear her eyes away from them. "Anaís, is this a picture of me?"
Anaís giggles and nods as Alexia points to the stick figure of herself.
"I drawed it." Anaís says, and you stifle a laugh at the ridiculousness of the drawing. It is definitely easy to figure out it's done by an almost 3 year old.
"These are the best present I've ever got." It's then that she notices even the shoelaces are customised; red and blue hearts drawn by Anaís are patterned up and down the laces, and even the aglets of them have Anaís' name written there. "You both really thought of everything."
"We did our best." You affirm, leaning into her side when she holds her arm out. The arm of the chairs make it a little uncomfortable, but it doesn't take away from the moment.
"Tengo la mejor familia, eh?" Alexia whispers, kissing Anaís' forehead again, then your cheek. "Mis amores, are you staying for lunch?"
"Anaís was a little bit nervous about that earlier." You reveal, and the little girl nods sheepishly.
"Hey, that's okay! You can stay with me and Mama if you need to, everybody just loves seeing you smile, mi sol pequeña." Alexia says to Anaís, and the girl follows through immediately with her big, cheesy smile. "Exactly like that. Shall we go now? I'm hungry and I want to show off my amazing gift to everybody."
After that, the three of you make your way round to the cafeteria. Anaís sits on your lap throughout, eating a bowl of her favourite meal, tomato pasta, before drawing personalised name stickers for everyone she knows. Her tiny mind gets blown away when she finds out Mapi's last name means lion, so she of course has to sit with her for the rest of dinner to discuss such an outrageous topic. It gives you and Alexia a moment alone after it all, and she shuffles your chair closer so that she can whisper endless amount of soft words to you. She can't believe her fortune at having two people do such an act of kindness for her, and she makes sure the two of you know it.
The only thing is, those one of a kind boots aren't the sole surprise of the day. And the next one shocks you too.
Later that evening, as Alexia is in Anaís' room reading her a bedtime story and you do your skincare in the ensuite, something catches your eye in the back corner of the cupboard when you go to get your cleanser. It's a box you haven't paid any mind to since the first round of IVF for the second baby, as it had unfairly gotten your hopes up. But now it piques your interest too much, and whilst Alexia is busy elsewhere, you decide to do it.
You're not expecting anything, having been let down too many times, and that's why you scream so loud.
"Oh my fucking god!"
About half a millisecond later, Alexia comes running in with a disgruntled and half-asleep Anaís in her arms.
"What's wrong!?" She asks desperately, noticing your trembling shoulders as you faced away from her and your teary eyes in the mirror.
Slowly, you turn around, another hCG test in you hand.
"This s-says twenty-six, Ale." You stutter, your free hand coming up to cover your mouth.
The pair of you stare at each other in disbelief, eyes wide and jaws to the floor. You're probably an image to behold, with two under-eye masks on and spot cream dotted around your face, and Anaís in Alexia's hold looks less than pleased at the events that have occurred with her wild bed-head.
"It says what?!" Alexia cries out, breaking the stand-off and coming over to you so she can catch a look at it. "It does say twenty-six!"
"Ale..." You breathe out, looking up into her eyes and shaking your head. "I'm not falling for this again."
"Amor, don't start stressing. Let's take this as a good thing for now, and we will go to our appointment tomorrow like normal. Okay? Don't stress, please, this is a very good sign." Alexia reasurres you, wrapping an arm around you and rubbing your shoulder comfortingly. Anaís still has no clue what's going on, but she sleepily puts an arm around your neck too, always one for a family hug.
"Last time though, it gave us a good score and it ended up being nothing." You sighed, closing your eyes in her hold.
"But last time wasn't as high as this. This is much better, this is an amazing sign. The only thing we can do is wait to see the nurse tomorrow, okay?" You nod reluctantly, sighing in frustration and pulling away. "Is it alright if I go put Anaís to sleep? Or do you want her to stay with us for a bit?"
You look at your daughter in Alexia's arms and instantly make a decision; you could never deny cuddles with her.
"Take her to bed with us."
For a little while, the three of you cuddle closely together in your bed, a film of Anaís' choice playing on TV even though she had fallen asleep less than ten minutes into it. Once it had finished, Alexia went to put her in her own bed before coming straight back to you. You try to settle into sleep, but it evades you due to your clouded mind, and Alexia notices. She spends an unknown amount of time reasurring you, also talking about everything and nothing to sooth you, until you eventually do fall asleep. It takes a while for her to get to sleep too, but she does with a smile on her face.
And she was right to have that smile, because the next day at your already scheduled blood test with the nurse, it's confirmed that you are pregnant. The relief is overwhelming, because it's not just the fact that you are finally pregnant, it also erases all the doubt and guilt and whatnot from the past eight months, finally clearing your head from it all. It's a huge weight off of your shoulders, and an almost equally large on off of Alexia's because the heartbreak she felt everytime, not only when a transfer failed, but when you loathed yourself after each one was so heavy, it nearly broke her in two. But here you were, healthy and happier than ever with a baby growing and a smile on your face.
Being able to tell family and friends a little while after was an incredible experience, somehow even better than telling them about Anaís, because they all knew the struggles of the past months and how difficult it had been for you and Alexia. Your favourite part though was telling Anaís, even if it was a little anti-climatic, because she simply shrugged and said 'about time' before asking to go to the park.
There was one little worry. Not a problem with your health or the baby, but with Anaís. Because she was so excited about having a sibling, except she often would say...
"It better not be a boy." She would huff grumpily, and she would say it unprompted too whilst doing things like drawing a family picture and adding a baby to the tummy of your stick figure or as she played with her dolls.
And it was certainly a worry because the baby did end up being a boy. It was yours and Alexia's plan to tell Anaís the gender on her birthday, but after finding out it was a boy, that didn't seem like such a great plan. Out of fear of possibly ruining her birthday, you told her the day after, and it went much better than you expected.
"Will he play dolls with me? And like stickers? And like drawing?" She had asked after a few moments of silence.
"He probably will, yes." You responded.
"He might even like football too." Alexia grinned, and Anaís easily matched her with a cheeky smile of her own as you rolled your eyes.
"I guess that's okay then."
As you months rolled on and you moved from trimester to trimester, Anaís fell more and more in love with her little brother. She loved talking about him, as well as talking to him whenever she was given a chance, her hands moving around your bump to feel his little kicks. With each one-sided conversation she had, she would end it with a kiss and a whisper of 'hurry up, chico!'
Your hormones had kicked in a little stronger this pregnancy, because every time Anaís would interact with your bump, your reaction would range from a lump in your throat, to full on tears. Alexia loved it, teasing you every so often, but she quickly figured out her limits after your tears of joy at Anaís soon turned into tears of pain when the baby dealt you a hard kick to the ribs. The Spaniard's face immediately paled when you screamed at her so furiously, it sent Anaís running for the hills through the house. Thankfully, the next day, the little girl forgot all about the night's events, until one day a while later she brought it up in front of her Tía Alba, and your face turned red with embarrassment.
Your little boy decided to bring himself into the world a tad early in September that year, with a bit of a longer labour and more complicated birth. But, in the end, her arrived safely and healthily, and the same went for you. Alexia had sat there, biting her nails anxiously as the doctors did their checks, but they ultimately gave you the all-clear and the nausea left her stomach.
"We still don't have a name." You huffed tiredly when Alexia took him from one of the nurses and brought him over to you.
"That's okay. We will figure it out. For now, just look at his cute face." Alexia smiled brightly, sitting beside you carefully and showing him off.
"He is cute." You sighed contently, resting your head on her shoulder. This birth had thoroughly taken it out of you, and it was a miracle you were able to keep your eyes open.
"He is chubby." Alexia hummed, and she winced when you lightly slapped her hip.
"Be nice to him." You scolded her, but Alexia was just glad to see the smile on your face that you failed to fight back.
"I am being nice, he just has very big cheeks." Alexia defended herself, raising a hand to lightly run the back of her finger along his cheek, a gesture you remember her doing for Anaís.
He was clearly much more fed up with the day then Anaís was when she was born, because he was already fast asleep. His little mouth was open, and sometimes when he fidgeted in his sleep, his tongue would poke out momentarily. Alexia laughed quietly whenever he did as you watched them both, already absolutely infatuated with the sight.
"I can't wait for Anaís to meet him." Alexia stated, and you nodded in agreement. "Can we ring her? Or do you want to rest some more?"
"No, let's ring her. I miss her."
For obvious reasons, it had been over a day since you'd last seen Anaís, the longest you'd gone without being with her. Alexia passed your son over to you and got her phone out of her pocket, going onto it and getting up her Mami's contact.
"You're sure?" She checked, and you nodded.
Within three rings, Eli answered the FaceTime call, and before she could even speak, Anaís' face took over the whole screen.
"Is he here yet, Mami?" She asked quietly, and Alexia couldn't resist.
"No, not yet, I'm sorry chiqui."
"Ale! Don't be mean, tell her."
As soon as Anaís heard your voice, she gasped excitedly, hoping she had correctly interpreted your words.
"He is here?"
"He is. There he is." Alexia turned the camera so that you and the baby were in view for Anaís to see, and her face was adorable.
"Oh my... he is so cute." She whispered, noticing he was asleep and speaking as quietly as she could. "I love him."
"You do?" Alexia said, her heart filled with more love than she ever thought possible.
"I really love him." Anaís smiled brightly. "Is Mama okay?"
"Yes, I'm okay, thank you mi niña. I am very, very tired, but I'm alright." You told her, and she nodded, glad to hear it.
"Does he have a name?" You shook your head and saw her eyes light up. "I have a name!"
"Go on." Alexia prompted her, not really expecting anything that could be a good suggestion.
"Oriol!" Anaís said proudly.
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, wondering where on earth she got that from, but happy with it nonetheless. It was already on the name list you and Alexia had, and it was actually one of your favourites. But the pair of you just couldn't choose, so you decided to shortlist a few and to wait and see until he is born. Oriol was indeed a name on the shortlist.
"Yes, that is a good name." You nodded, looking at Alexia to see what she thought.
"I really like that name, well done chiqui." Alexia replied, and the pair of you share a glance.
Speaking with Anaís for a little longer, you both notice her getting progressively more tired as it got closer to her bedtime. With the promise that she can visit tomorrow, you say goodbye to her and let her take one final look at her brother before she goes to the room she was staying in at Eli's. You stay on the phone with Eli for a few moments, smiling at all the praise she offers you, before she bids you both farewell and hangs up.
"So..." Alexia started, looking down at your son. "I think we have a solution to our problem?"
You look down at him too, knowing what Alexia was talking about, and nod.
"I think we do."
When Anaís visits the next day, she hugs you and Alexia tightly first, having missed her two favourite people in the world for the short time she was away. Then, Alexia gets the baby out of the hospital cot and shows him to her, and she's fascinated by him. She quickly has a moment of overwhelming excitement, and she jumps around on the spot away from him so that she can, in her own words, 'get it all out' before she holds him.
Sitting on the chair beside your bed, pillows scattered around her, Alexia carefully places him in her arms that hold him securely. Unsurprising to you, you immediately well up at the sight, wanting to burn the image into your mind forever. She makes sure she holds him properly, asking Alexia every so often if she's doing it right, before she leans down and kisses his hat-covered head softly. Alexia shows her a special 'trick', where she offers her finger out to the baby and Anaís gasps quietly when he wraps his hand around Alexia's finger. The moment only forces more tears out of you, and Alexia looks up at you and flashes you a teasing smile. Her attention is drawn away from you not a second later when Anaís asks something.
"Does he have a name yet?"
Just like last night, you and Alexia share a glance, before you turn back to Anaís.
"His name is Oriol."
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thewulf · 5 months
Text
Whispers in the Night || Jake "Hangman" Seresin
Summary: Request - Can i request a jake x reader where they're partners/married and she's pregnant (maybe like 6 months) and he has to go on a mission. when he gets back she's just super clingy because 1) she was worried and scared and 2) she just missed him. and maybe he snaps at her
A/N: TY for the request. Love Jake sm!! Enjoy!
Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Female Reader
Word Count: 2.4k +
T/W : Angsty in the beginning
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The house felt different without Jake. His absence echoed through the rooms leaving a void that seemed impossible to fill. As you sat on the couch the silence of the house felt deafening in Jake's absence. Your fingers absentmindedly traced patterns on your swollen belly seeking comfort in the life growing inside you. But despite the reassuring kicks and movements from your unborn child there was an undeniable sense of unease that settled deep within your heart.
Each day without Jake felt like an eternity. The minutes dragging on as you counted down the moments until his return. You tried to distract yourself with mundane tasks, but the worry and anticipation gnawed at your insides like a relentless tide. Jake made sure you weren’t completely alone though. His mom came to stay with you for a few weeks. Your mom popped over as she could as she lived a few hours away. Even friends would come over keeping you busy, and mind occupied when he wasn’t there. But the nights were always hard. Always when you craved his touch and sweet whispers. Six weeks was a long time for him to be away in the middle of your pregnancy, but you knew what you signed up for when you married him a few years ago.
Being accustomed to Jake's dangerous line of work did little to ease your anxiety this time around. If anything, the realization that you were six months pregnant only amplified your fears. Every news report, every phone call filled you with dread. You mind always seemed to imagine the worst-case scenarios playing out. To add insult to injury you couldn’t even call him or write him. They were on a no contact mission. Your least favorite.
You longed for his presence, his reassuring touch, his calming voice. But as the days turned into weeks, the void left by his absence only seemed to grow larger, consuming you with a sense of longing for the man you called your husband.
Perhaps it was just your maternal instinct kicking in, but the fear of the unknown loomed over you like a dark cloud. It cast a shadow over even the brightest moments. You tried to stay strong for yourself and for your unborn child, but deep down the uncertainty gnawed at your heart with every passing moment. Fortunately for you it was coming up on six weeks and thankfully it had been radio silent. That was the best-case scenario for these types of missions.
The familiar sound of the front door opening stirred you from your slumber though you remained in that hazy state between sleep and wakefulness. As you shifted slightly in bed you felt a pair of strong arms enveloping you pulling you into a warm embrace. Startled by the touch your eyes fluttered open. Y you were met with the sight of Jake, his beautiful face illuminated by the soft glow of the moonlight filtering through the window.
"Jake?" you murmured, your voice heavy with sleep and confusion.
He smiled over at you with his eyes filled with tenderness. "Hey, sweetheart. It's just me. Go back to sleep love." he reassured you. His voice a soothing melody in the quiet of the night.
You blinked trying to process the sudden appearance of your husband. "You're home early though," you observed, your heart fluttering with a mixture of surprise and joy. You were supposed to pick him up from the base in a few days’ time. This was a wonderful surprise though.
Jake nodded as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. "The mission ended earlier than expected. Everyone was eager to get back home.  We all voted on coming back. I just couldn’t wait to see my beautiful wife." he explained. His voice tinged with relief as he watched you with the utmost love in his eyes.
You melted into his embrace. Feeling the warmth of his body against yours, the familiar scent of his cologne enveloping you like a comforting blanket. Despite the initial shock of being awakened from your sleep there was no place you'd rather be than in Jake's arms. As you nestled closer to him you became acutely aware of the changes in your body since he had left. The baby had grown significantly in the six weeks of his absence. Evidence of the new life growing inside you.
He shifted slightly in bed his hand finding its way to your larger belly now. With a tender touch, he traced gentle circles on your skin, his touch sending shivers down your spine. "The little one has grown a lot," he whispered, his voice filled with wonder and awe as he held you close to him revealing in your heartbeat. It was always a silent comfort he craved and missed so dearly while deployed.
You smiled feeling a surge of affection for the man lying beside you. "Growing big and strong just like his or her daddy," you teased while running a hand through his now shaggy hair. The two of you opted to keep the gender a surprise.
He chuckled softly as he pressed another kiss to your forehead. "I missed you, angel" he murmured. His words a silent promise of his unwavering devotion. And as you lay entwined in each other's arms the worries and uncertainties of the world faded away leaving behind only the overwhelming love and warmth that bound you together.
As the next day wore on, Jake couldn't shake off the feeling of being overwhelmed by your presence. Not that it was your intention. But the sheer intensity of your need for him seemed to permeate the very air around them. You craved him, your every move mirroring his own as if you couldn't bear to let him out of your sight for even a moment.
At first Jake found your clinginess endearing. It was a testament to the depth of your love and longing. A quiet declaration of your desire to be close to him after his long absence. He welcomed your affection. Your constant need for his presence filling a void he hadn't even realized existed.
But as the hours stretched on your constant proximity began to grate on his nerves. Every time he turned around you were there watching him with worried eyes. Your need for him palpable in every touch, every word. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate your affection – far from it. But the intensity of your clinginess seemed to smother him leaving him gasping for air in the suffocating embrace of your love.
Jake's time on the carrier had left him overstimulated. He was constantly surrounded by noise and activity. Now back in the familiar confines of home the silence seemed deafening, yet your presence felt like an onslaught of sensory overload. He longed for solitude, for a moment of peace to collect his thoughts and decompress after the chaos of his mission.
Your concern for him only heightened the pressure he felt. The weight of your worry pressing down on him. He knew you meant well, that your clinginess was a manifestation of your love and longing for him. But right now, he just needed space. With every touch, every word, he felt the walls closing in around him. The need for air becoming more desperate with each passing moment. He tried to push down the rising tide of frustration. To swallow the bitter taste of guilt that lingered on his tongue. But it was a losing battle.
As he retreated into himself seeking solace in the quiet recesses of his mind, he couldn't help but feel a pang of remorse at the hurt he knew his words would cause you. But in that moment he couldn't bear to think about anything except the overwhelming need to be alone. To find respite from the constant barrage of emotions threatening to engulf him.
No sooner had he settled on the couch trying to catch up on some much-needed rest. He felt your presence hovering nearby. You stood at the edge of the room. Your eyes never leaving him. Your need for his attention a silent plea that echoed in the silence of the house.
"Y/N, can't you find something else to do?" Jake finally asked. Unable to contain his frustration any longer.
Your heart sank at the sharpness of his tone, the hurt evident in your eyes as you took a step back. A tear welled up in the corner of your eye showing him the hurt you felt inside at the words he just spoke.
"I'm so sorry, Jake," you whispered. Your voice trembling with emotion. "I think it's the hormones."
Jake's heart sank at the sound of your voice. The weight of your words hitting him like a ton of bricks. He could see the hurt etched on your face. The vulnerability in your eyes tugging at his heartstrings.
His expression softened at realization of the pain he had caused evident in his eyes. "No, angel, it's not your fault," he murmured. His voice filled with regret. "I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I was just... overwhelmed."
He reached out to touch your hand, but you pulled away feeling self-conscious over your sudden clinginess to him. With a heavy heart you turned away walking out of the room despite his profuse apologies. Jake watched helplessly as you retreated into yourself. The distance between you growing with each passing moment.
Jake felt a heavy sense of regret weighing on his chest as he watched you retreat away. Despite his apologies he couldn't shake the feeling that he had let you down. That he had failed to provide the comfort and reassurance you needed in that moment of vulnerability. He wanted nothing more than to reach out to you. To wrap you in his arms and soothe away the hurt he had caused, but he knew that he had to give you the space you needed.
As the hours passed Jake found himself pacing the empty rooms of the house. The silence you had grown accustomed to weighing heavily on his shoulders. He tried to focus on the tasks at hand to distract himself from the gnawing sense of unease that lingered in the back of his mind. But no matter how hard he tried he couldn't shake the feeling of emptiness that seemed to permeate every corner of the house. Was this how you felt when he was gone?
Meanwhile, you lay curled up on the bed. Your thoughts consumed by the events of the day. Despite your best efforts to push them away the hurtful words and the sharpness of Jake's tone echoed in your mind. You couldn't help but feel self-conscious of your actions, second-guessing every word you had spoken and every tear you had shed. Even when Jake checked in on you with his concern evident in every word and gesture you couldn't bring yourself to face him. Your need for solitude outweighing the comfort of his presence. You were embarrassed. How could you not pick up on the signs? Of course, he needed space. Missions were a drag. You knew that better than anyone.
And so, as the sun dipped below the horizon and the darkness of night descended upon the house you remained cocooned in your own thoughts. The distance between you and Jake stretching on indefinitely.
But as night fell and the quiet of the house enveloped them, Jake couldn't bear it any longer. He found you in the bedroom where you’d been all day, curled up on the bed. Your tears staining the pillow beneath your head. Without a word he crossed the room and pulled you into his arms holding you close as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.
As Jake held you in his embrace he felt the tension in your body slowly begin to melt away, replaced by a sense of warmth and comfort that washed over him like a gentle tide. He knew that you were pretending to be asleep, your breathing steady and even, but he also knew you too well to be fooled by the facade.
"I know you're awake, angel," he murmured, his voice a soft whisper in the darkness of the room.
You remained silent. Your eyes closed as you listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. The warmth of his body enveloping you like a protective shield. Despite the hurt and the distance that had grown between you, you couldn't deny the overwhelming sense of relief that flooded through you at his touch. The knowledge that he was there by your side, ready to mend the cracks in your fragile heart.
"I'm so sorry, angel," Jake whispered, his voice filled with sincerity. "I never should have snapped at you. I shouldn’t have taken that out on you."
You opened your eyes meeting his gaze with a mixture of sadness and longing. "I'm sorry too," you replied. Your voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't mean to be so clingy. I don’t know what’s going on with me." And with that you felt more tears falling.
Jake shook his head. His expression softening as he cupped your face in his hands. "No, baby, you have nothing to apologize for," he insisted, his voice gentle but firm. "I love how much you care, how much you need me. It's what makes us work. I let my own stress get the better of me rather than talking about it with you. I should have leaned on you instead of pushing you away."
As his words washed over you, a sense of relief flooded through you, the weight of guilt lifting from your shoulders. You realized that despite the challenges you faced, the love and understanding between you were stronger than ever before.
Jake's thumb gently brushed away the tears that still lingered on your cheeks. His touch tender and reassuring. Pulling you close, he wrapped his arms around you, holding you as if he never wanted to let go. His hands drifted down to cup your growing belly, whispering sweet nothings to the baby growing inside. The sensation sent your heart into overdrive with a surge of warmth spreading through you at the sight of Jake's adoration for your little one.
And as Jake leaned in to capture your lips in a tender kiss, you felt the steady emotion of love wash over you. The barriers that had kept you apart crumbling away in the face of your shared love and forgiveness.
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thisblogisaboutabook · 7 months
Text
Rainy Season - Part 5
I Want Crazy
Azriel Eris x Reader
After a promotion to an emissary position by a meddling Tarquin, Y/N and Eris get much, much closer.
A/n: There will likely only be a couple more chapters of this fic. For those of you concerned by the previous chapter, please continue to trust the process. Our girl is intelligent.
Part 4 Part 6
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Warnings: Language, brief mention of fertility struggles
Our first date, the seasons changed. It got washed away in a summer rain
He wasn’t what I expected, Eris Vanserra. Not that I ever fathomed what to expect or even considered it. In fact there was only a very short list of things I knew prior to the day we met:
-He was a High Lord.
-He’d been a secretive ally of the Night Court prior to his father’s demise.
-Azriel fucking hated him.
And after that day I knew everything I needed to:
-He was warm beyond the fire in his veins
-He was a just ruler
-He had a dry wit that sat well with my soul.
-I wanted to see him again.
After dancing that night, we ran back to Tarquin’s palace in the rain. It was the first time I’d been unable to contain my joy in far too long. I laughed, and skipped, and spun in circles the whole way back. Eris grumbled the entire way but I could see the amusement lit in his eyes. The next morning he met me for breakfast and found me again before he left for the Autumn Court.
He began finding reasons to visit the Summer Court more frequently and sought me out every time. It was no time before Eris became a close friend.
Tarquin - ever the cheeky, wonderful bastard - only gave me knowing smiles when he’d catch us walking the palace grounds. According to Cresseida, The High Lord of the Summer Court was quite the romantic and had a knack for playing matchmaker. I was inclined to agree considering that after a month of spotting Eris and I around the grounds, Tarquin made a proposition to me. I could still teach my classes but he needed a temporary emissary to the Autumn court as they negotiated border, trade, and tariff agreements. Given my recent closeness with the High Lord of Autumn and overall wonderful (debatable) disposition, he found me to be the perfect candidate. With that, I found myself on official court business in the Autumn Court.
Who cares if you’re all I think about?
I was nervous on the first visit to Autumn. I knew things were different under Eris’ reign but the stories of Beron’s cruelty within his own keep were enough to warrant a bit of caution.
My worries were quickly cast aside when Eris personally escorted me from the border and to his keep. The Autumn Court was stunning. The leaves on the trees were brighter than I’d ever seen. The hues ranging from gold to red absolutely stunning. I’d love to have Feyre one day paint it for me.
Smells of roasting chestnuts, hickory smoke, crisp leaves, apple cider, and autumn air filled my nose. On the way, Eris stopped by a small farm where the owner allowed us to pick what Eris called the finest Honeycrisp apples in all of Prythian. I’d never had that variety before and though I had nothing to compare them against, the apples had the perfect crunch and just the right ratio of tart and sweet. He paid the farmer handsomely for a bucket of them and several pie pumpkins for his kitchens.
The Autumn Keep was far from the drab stone castle that I’d pictured. Eris clearly went to great strides to ensure the ghost of Beron Vanserra had no hold here. The grand rooms were filled with maple accents, rugs and tapestries with hues greens, golds, oranges and reds. Fires roared in massive fireplaces and autumnal spices filled the air.
And despite the beauty of the keep. I couldn’t seem to keep my eyes off of the tall, handsome redhead walking alongside me.
Once I was settled for the stay, we did meet to discuss political matters which took countless hours, but I was rather impressed with the ease of our negotiations. He and Tarquin had similar visions for the economic future within their courts.
We enjoyed dinner together, indulged in autumnal wines, including a hot mulled wine that flushed my cheeks. Or so I told Eris that was the reason for the blush on my features, and certainly not the way way he’d refer to me as “my lady” or “little fox.”
We’d stayed up late, sitting by a bon fire outside beneath the Autumn Skies. There was music and dancing, spiked ciders, and caramel apples. I could see why Eris loves his court.
We, of course, kept respectful distance from eachother as not to spark any gossip of anything more than friendship between he and I. Yet somehow, hours later, we found ourselves in a private courtyard - a small fire burning as we lay back on a blanket together. I began to shiver as the evening chill grew cooler. As I went to bid Eris goodnight and head for the warmth within Castle Walls, he halted me.
“Come here” he spoke. His voice low.
I scooted a bit closer.
“Come closer, little fox. I won’t bite.”
He refrained from adding “unless you ask me to” but that was readable enough in his heavy lidded gaze.
So I laid beside him, my head nestled between his chest and shoulder as his heat warmed my body. I showed him various constellations that I’d learned of during my time in the Night Court and he did a terrible job of visualizing them. He tried though. He told me how he used to wish on shooting stars, how he still found himself occasionally wishing upon them. I teared up when he told me of the wishes he’d made back then for his mother and Lucien, for himself, to one day escape Beron’s cruelty. For a better life. A better Court.
When we saw a shooting star later, he made a wish and told me it was bad luck to tell someone else the wish.
And I, despite everything that had turned upside down in life, found myself struggling to ask for anything more than what I had in that moment.
When we finally said goodnight I realized his own suite was right next to the one he had set me up in.
I woke in a sweat sometime hours before dawn. Pain ripping through my chest. Azriel once again pulling on the fucking bond with no regard for the feelings of despair he was shoving to me. This time was worse than usual, the waves of grief continuing to grow stronger and stronger all the time. It wasn’t fair. I didn’t deserve this. This was a bed of his own making and yet I still had to suffer beyond what I’d already been through. Sleeping through it was futile and the room’s darkness began to suffocate me.
I padded from my room to a common area outside of the suites, sat before the fireplace and worked on breathing through it.
Though I tried my best to remain quiet, Eris apparently had a sharp sense of hearing as he wandered into the room, seating himself on the floor beside me. If I hadn’t been in such a sorry state, perhaps I would have noticed the low slung gray sweatpants and broad muscled chest of the half-naked High Lord- no, friend - beside me.
He took my hand. “Hey, fox, look at me.” I lifted my gaze to his. “You’ve got this. Breathe for me.” I took a shallow breath. “Can you breathe deeper for me, little one?” He placed a hand on my shoulder while the other remained on my hand. I took a deeper breath and let it out slowly.
“Good girl.”
Eris sat with me in silence on a plush couch once my breathing steadied. Still too worked up to fall back asleep, I nestled myself against Eris’ chest while his fingers ran through my hair in soothing, repetitive strokes.
It was hours later that I awoke, finding that I’d fallen asleep on him. I tried shifting away slowly but a sleeping Eris only held his arm around me tighter as I pulled. We slept like that a while longer.
The rest of the trip went by uneventfully. We discussed further trade options and Eris spent the evenings working with me on how to close off the bond to Azriel’s feelings. While I was already excellent at shutting down sending my feelings down the bond, cutting off his feelings was what I needed help with. By the end of the stay I could only feel his emotions slightly.
I expressed my gratitude to Eris who only waived off my thanks. “Anyone would have done it.” Yet he was the only one who tried. What I didn’t tell Eris was that as Azriel’s end of the bond silenced and the depths of my soul went from overflowing to filled with contentment, my thoughts began drifting to happier things, drifted to him.
Front porch and one more kiss. It doesn't make sense to anybody else.
The fifth month after I left, my grandparents held an outdoor feast for our family and friends in celebration of a holiday of one of the lesser Summer gods they worshipped.
It was far from a religious event. There was always wine, dancing, and lively conversation at these celebrations with none of the boring sermons that typically came with such events.
I invited Eris, and to my delight he came. My drunken sister made plenty of comments over how pretty of a pair of “friends” we made, with overemphasis on the word. My sweet, protective nephew took to Eris right away, deciding that after what Azriel put me through, anyone was better than him. He had no tolerance for cheating or sympathy for adulterers from the time he was old enough to understand what it meant and that his father had cheated on my sister during her pregnancy (real stand up guy) though my sister was so far out of his league that he’d have to reach the stars to find someone better. Obviously she’d left him immediately and she and my nephew were better off for it.
My family tried their best and failed miserably to act normal with the High Lord of the Autumn Court in their presence. Fortunately, Eris paid no mind and had won everyone over by the end of the night.
Despite his aversion to the sand, Eris accepted my invitation to camp on the beach so we could enjoy my favorite part of the night, the fireworks shooting off over the bay.
As the finale approached, I pouted.
“I hate when they end.”
Gesturing toward himself, Eris replied. “It’s a good thing you have a High Lord at your disposal to light up the night any time you wish.”
Before I could reprimand him for the crude comment, he began shooting small orbs of fire toward the water in a rainbow of colors.
My eyes sparkled watching the vibrant flares. Soon enough the orbs into butterflies of fire flying through the air, some circling around me. One brushed my cheek and there was no pain, just a gentle flutter.
“That’s… Just wow, that’s incredible, Eris!”
He gave a shrug of nonchalance in return.
“I bet you do that for all the ladies, don’t you?”
Eris looked me in the eyes, something unreadable in them.
“Only the ones I want to kiss.”
A moment passed before I realized that he was entirely serious.
And that I WANTED to kiss him.
So I did.
We kissed under the stars. It was a hard, passionate kiss, our shared breaths riddled with desperation, a profession of the unspoken words between us, “I’ve been waiting for this.”
And when we eventually pulled apart, I looked into his eyes with a smile, genuine, full of adoration, and Eris gently grasped the back of my head, pulling me into another searing kiss.
We shared many more before dawn.
You can’t undo a fall like this.
When Eris returned to the Autumn Court, I tried feeling any remorse for what we’d done. I was technically still a mated female, though I’d left and due to Azriel’s infidelity nobody expected me to honor the bond.
The guilt never came.
Eris had to travel so I wasn’t able to see him for the next couple weeks but we wrote back and forth often through enchanted notes. Curiosity or concern must have gotten the best of him because eventually he asked:
“Do you regret it?”
I knew exactly what he referred to.
“I regret many things, Eris. None of which pertain to you.”
I sent the letter to him with confidence. I did not regret a single thing about the night our lips collided on the beach.
“Thank the Mother, because I need to kiss you again.”
Heat radiated through me at his admission.
But then reality struck. He was the High Lord of the Autumn Court. I was the - separated, yes, but still - the mate of the Night Court’s Spymaster.
“Eris, I love spending time with you and will never regret it. You’ve helped me heal in ways I will never be able to repay you for. But this… how can this work? It’s messy.”
I sent the letter. My own heart crushing at the words. I didn’t want this to end but I couldn’t risk it going further just for reality to come crashing down on us.
Some time passed, the unease in my gut growing when his response appeared.
“If I wanted easy, I’d have married the daughter of some Autumn Lord. Nothing about my past has been easy and despite what some may believe, nothing worth having has come easily to me. Every second spent with you is worth it. Do not, Y/N, doubt that for one single moment. And perhaps this is crazy, but I would not want it any other way.”
It was that moment that I knew I wanted, I needed Eris as more than a friend.
“Then let’s be crazy, Eris Vanserra.”
I don't want "good" and I don't want "good enough"
The thing about immortality is that six months can bring more change than six decades or even centuries.
Six months ago I would have never dreamed that my mate would take the life we’d built over the years and tear it into shreds with those once sacred, beautiful scarred hands that I held reverently. The hands that placed the lovely mating band crafted from one of his own siphons on my finger after he’d made his vows, the hands that lovingly caressed my bare thighs through restless nights until sleep took me, hands that held me pressed to his chest and wiped away the tears of grief after yet another failed fertility cycle.
Those hands that held another and damned it all, the hands that came home and stroked my hair as pretty lies fell from his mouth, the hands that took my glass heart and dropped it.
I especially wouldn’t have dreamed that six months later I would be laying in the bed of the High Lord of the Autumn Court with his strong, warm hands holding me like this heart of mine that he’d forged anew was the most delicate, precious possession in his keep.
I want "can't sleep, can't breathe without your love"
We’d spent the night together making love. The kind of love making that shifts something intrinsic within a person, the type where no matter what happens, a piece of you is forever changed. It was more than just giving my body to him, it was a claiming of the soul.
We lay in bed all morning, his long fingers tracing along the arch of my bare back as he pressed soft kisses along my shoulder and neck. Between kisses, his low voice whispered quiet hopes and dreams for the future.
I was just about to speak those three words that I’d only ever spoken to one other male when a loud knock came on the chamber door.
“For fuck’s sake” Eris muttered before shouting “Come back later!”
“We apologize, High Lord but this is urgent.” a muffled male voice replied through the closed door.
Eris growled, shifting out of bed and throwing on his sweatpants not bothering with a shirt. I enjoyed the view.
“This better be worth my while, lads.” Eris hissed in a tone that conveyed “I’m very fucking inconvenienced right now but understand that you are doing your duty as my sentries.”
“Apologies again, High Lord, but we’ve….”
The male outside the door cleared his throat in attempt to communicate that the matter should be discussed privately.
“It’s fine.” Eris grumbled. “Just get on with it.”
“We, well, High Lord, we’ve apprehended the Shadowsinger. He was making an attempt to infiltrate the keep.”
———————————
@going-through-shit @kalulakunundrum @lisanna2000 @fxckmiup @sheblogs @emryb @one-big-fangirl @historygeekqueen @isa1b2h3 @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @theravenphoenix26 @sidthedollface2 @i-am-infinite @caraaaaugh @evergreenlark @darkbloodsly @piceous21 @anxious-study @chessebookgirl @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @crazylokonugget @mysticalfuncollectorus @starsinyourseyes @b0xerdancer-writes @inloveallthetime @thegirlinshadows101 @viistrength @grunchwench @starryhiraeth @macimads @feiwelinchen @acourtofbatboydreams @nebarious
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coralinnii · 9 months
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Congrats on 2.7k! The villain(ess) saga is my bread and butter hehe.
Anyways Id like to request borderline desperate Jamil trying to figure out Readers fav food as they can and will literally eat anything without complaint(even Lilia's cooking lol). Thank you 💖
‧₊˚✧A Dash of Sweetness ‧₊˚✧
↳ Reader S/O who eats anything
feat: Jamil  genre: fluff (like shojou manga level sweetness) note: no pronouns used with the reader, idiots in love, kinda oblivious!reader, roughly 1k words,
Random storytime, my big bro once got hungry and cooked himself eggs while the rest of us were out, and no one told him the eggs went bad. He was absolutely fine the entire day and none of us would have known if not for my bro saying it’s weird that the egg he ate was green. Yet, he said the french toasts I made once were bland T_T
Anyway, this took a while because I honestly didn't know how this story will end up, hopefully you enjoy it ^_^
2.7K Followers Writing Event 2023
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Jamil can deny all day and night, but he really likes to see you enjoy his cooking. For all the times he told you that he already has his hands full with Kalim, there was suspiciously always a warm lunchbox filled with aromatic meals made by yours truly. All for that bright smile of yours whenever you would finish off the “leftover” meal that Jamil would generously share with you. 
When Jamil realized that others have fed you, his hidden competitive nature rose. While there were many competent students with skills in the kitchen, within Jamil was a desire to see a special shine in your eyes when he cooks your favorite dish, a visual only for him.
But be it due to pride or embarrassment, Jamil doesn’t seem to be the type to be upfront with his intentions, nor does he take the straightforward tactic. Instead of asking you directly, he would ease his way through conversations with your friends just to find out your most favored dish per chance. But that turned out that that was harder than he expected. 
Day after day, Jamil would hand you a new type of dish and watch your reaction for the slightest hint of preference. Perhaps a raise of your eyebrows, a slower time to take in the taste, anything. He's racking his brain and looked for every sort of dish and recipes from all parts of Twisted Wonderland for the slight chance he comes across a dish to your absolute liking. But each time, you simply smiled graciously and thanked him for sharing with you, not that he disliked it since he did get to spend more time with you through all of this. 
But each attempt makes him all the more impatient, and curious. If you looked this beautiful just eating something good, Jamil wondered how you’d look if he served you your most favored dish? Would he see your eyes light up with joy, your body shaking with excitement, your cheeks so cutely puffy and full with every bite, maybe even bring him into a spontaneous embrace filled with so much gratitude, perhaps even a kiss…  
“I’m getting ahead of myself.” Jamil hid his face in embarrassment, but the burning ears and racing heart revealed how much he wanted to see that side of you.
You found it odd how often it’s been that Jamil was offering you leftover food this past week. You’re certainly not complaining but it’s always something new everyday. Sometimes Jamil would hand you a meal mixed with aromatic spices, other times an array of sugary sweet treats and pastries. It could be a simple stew that warms your soul one day, or it could be a unique cuisine with a variety of paired side dishes. 
But every day, you would notice that he would glance your way occasionally as you partake in this gracious meal, and it’s making you a bit antsy. 
“You’ve been watching me for a while.” Your voice seemed to break whatever concentration the Scarabia student had. “Is there something you’re expecting me to say?” 
Like a deer in headlights, Jamil flinched and felt a small wave of embarrassment when he realized he was caught watching you. He was sure that he was being discrete, but he supposed that as days went on he had gotten a tad bit restless and hasty. He got sloppy, he cursed to himself.
Quickly shaking his nerves away, he replied with a smile to ease you. “I’m simply glad the food is to your taste.” 
You were hardly convinced by that. Was he experimenting with dishes, you wondered. You tried to offer some insights and compliments which seemed to satisfy the long-haired upperclassman, but you felt a sneaky suspicion that he was hoping for something else. 
“Jamil, I’m really happy that you’ve been sharing all this food with me.” You said as you settled the lunchbox to your side. “But I don’t think I’m the best person if you're looking for a detailed review on food.”
Ah yes, Jamil was aware of your generous palate. While trying to discreetly find your preferences, Jamil first assumed you had a sweet tooth when you praised the Heartslabyul vice-housewarden for his sweets. But then, Jamil overheard you enjoying your visits to Mostro Lounge so perhaps you had a pension for seafood…Then, he was thrown for a loop when he heard from a giddy Lilia that he was delighted to see you have such a rigorous appetite, having tried and finished the beef-seafood-fruit stew he made for his dormmates. 
You...were not picky, to say the least.
You felt a pang of shame for your lack of refined judgment in cuisine. “Your food is really good. Sorry, I don't know what else I can say about it that is helpful to you.”
That’s it. Jamil saw an opening. “Perhaps, I could make your favorite food,” his voice sounded as though it was a spontaneous thought. “Then it would be something you can speak more on a personal level.” 
All other attempts to learn your food preferences failed in the past, but now there was an opportunity to learn firsthand from the source. It wasn’t strange, was it? It was simply the flow of the conversation, and all the long-haired upperclassman did was offer an option. What an auspicious break for Jamil.
But when Jamil looked to you to gauge your reaction, you surprised him. 
You stared at him, eyes wide with shock. Your lips quivered and shook, as though your body was nervously processing his words, which deeply worried Jamil. Has he somehow offended you? How?! 
Finally, you spoke. “You would make something…just for me?” 
“Yes, if that’s something alright with you?”
All this time, you were under the impression that Jamil was offering you food that couldn’t be finished, and you were content with taking whatever was offered, happy that the vice-housewarden thought of you in some way. But having Jamil make something homemade purposely with you in mind… to think of you as he makes the effort to do something, hoping you will enjoy it. A sweet gesture made for you, and you alone.
Feelings of butterflies filled you as your cheeks felt hot at such thoughts. You felt your lips quiver as a goofy smile crept its way onto your face, but you tried to hide your giddiness behind your fingers.
You thought for a bit, then softly you replied. “Curry would be nice.” 
Hmm? Jamil was surprised. That’s his favorite…  
“Then, we can eat together.” You smiled nervously. “I think sharing with someone you like makes food taste better.” 
Such a lovely sight of two shy fools. One was grinning oddly while the other was hiding his shamefully burning face behind his hood.
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wonijinjin · 5 months
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happy birthday
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author’s note: a little fun fact about me, my birthday is actually on svt’s debut date, may 26th, so it is always an exceptionally special day for me hehe
synopsis: you expected a mystery cake, but your thoughtful boyfriend surprised you even more.
word count: 0.6k | genre: fluff, humour/crack | pairing: wonwoo x gn! reader | warnings: reader is shorter than wonwoo, mentions of cake and sweets, one curse word
“what flavour is the cake?” you asked excitedly when you spotted wonwoo with the big box upon exiting the bright doors of the bakery. the two of you came to pick up your pre placed order of a surprise mystery cake for your birthday, since you wanted to have a little fun this year with it. “i won’t tell you, you will have to guess it.” wonwoo replied mischievously, a little smirk evident on his face. “come on, don’t be such a meanie on my birthday!” you huffed to which he burst out in giggles and stepped towards you, towering over you. “sorry sweetheart, no can do, you will have to wait.” he whispered into your hair while kissing the crown of your head. “but i am so curious!” you pressed further with puppy eyes looking up at him, really trying to see if you could make his defenses crumble. “nuh uh don’t give me the sad puppy eyes, i won’t ruin the fun because someone here is a little curious.” he stated, determined to keep his mouth shut for the time being. “you are no fun.” you said while sulking and walking towards the car in the parking lot. you could tell he felt a bit bad about it, although he was absolutely right for trying to keep the promise he made to you before getting the cake, in which he swore to keep it a secret until you got home. when arriving next to the vehicle he realised he had no way of getting the container into the car by himself since his hands were full. “could you please open the car door for me?” he asked while still balancing the big cake in his hands, trying to avoid tripping in his own long legs. “tell me the flavour and i will.” you bargained even though you knew it was in vain; your precious boyfriend was way too good at keeping secrets. “fine, i will open it myself then.” as soon as he put the box on top of the car to free his hands you didn’t hesitate for a single moment and grabbed the sweet treat, opening the container to see the round ball of joy in its full glory (which by the way definitely looked too familiar, just like the flavour you loved), and to have a swipe from the delicious frosting on it. you almost managed to raise your coated finger to your mouth when a firm grip on your wrist made you freeze. “you are so bad today. what did i tell you about waiting?” wonwoo questioned with a serious look on his face; you didn’t dare move, afraid that he was actually mad, however your doubts faded away quickly when he started shaking his head in disbelief with the expression of amusement. you had a genius idea to get back at him and with a swift motion the mentioned frosting landed on his nose, looking cuter as ever. “you look exactly like a little cat, baby.” you laughed while he tried to get rid of the sweet coat and eventually tasted it. “hmm, not bad.” he smiled, satisfied with the taste. you did the same, confirming the fact that it was indeed tasty, and your favourite flavour suspiciously enough. “i wonder how the mystery cake ended up being exactly what i said i wanted before deciding on going with the flow.” you wondered out loud. “do you mind explaining it, my dear boyfriend?” you stood with hands on your hips, a playful glint in your eyes challenging him to reply. he shrugged his shoulders. “what can i say, you must be one hell of a lucky person sweetheart.” he grinned while giving you a sweet kiss on the lips. “happy birthday.”
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swiftiethatlovesf1 · 2 months
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Maxing Out on Emotions
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The opportunity to work as Red Bull's PR assistant was a dream come true, even though you had heard stories about Max Verstappen's fiery personality and grumpy attitude towards the media. When Christian Horner offered you the job, you were hesitant at first. However, you weren't one to judge based on gossip, and the chance to work in Formula 1 was too good to pass up.
Your first day didn't go as planned. Determined to make a positive impression, you decided to introduce yourself with a friendly gesture. Armed with boxes of doughnuts, you made your way to Max's driver's room, hoping to break the ice with a sweet treat. You knocked on the door, expecting a warm welcome, but there was no answer. Puzzled, you knocked again, a bit louder this time. The door swung open, and a less-than-happy Max stood before you. "What?" he said harshly, his eyes narrowing as he took in the sight of you. "Hi, I'm Y/N, your new PR assistant," you said nervously, trying to muster a smile. "I thought we should introduce ourselves since we're going to be working together this season." You held up the boxes of doughnuts with a hopeful grin. "Ah, and I brought doughnuts!" Max stared at you as if trying to decipher a complex puzzle, silence hanging heavily in the air. Finally, he spoke, his tone flat and unyielding. "I can't eat those doughnuts. They're against my diet." His bluntness made you feel foolish. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry," you stammered, your face flushing with embarrassment. Max continued to scrutinize you, his expression unreadable. "Look, I'm Max the driver, and you're Y/N the PR assistant. That's all we really need to know about each other." With that, he closed the conversation and the door to his driver's room, leaving you standing there with the untouched doughnuts.
Your subsequent interactions with Max weren't much better. He gave you short, curt responses and seemed to avoid you whenever possible. You often wondered if you had done something wrong, but you couldn't pinpoint what it might have been. Thankfully, you found solace in befriending other members of the team and the paddock, especially Daniel Ricciardo. His infectious energy and easygoing nature made him a joy to be around, and you quickly became close friends.
The paddock was buzzing with energy as the race weekend was in full swing. You were sitting with Daniel in a quiet corner, discussing his favourite Australian snacks, and his enthusiasm was infectious.
"Y/N, how is it possible that you've never tried them? Next time we go to Australia, I'm taking you with me to try them," Daniel said, his eyes twinkling with excitement.
You laughed, enjoying the light-hearted conversation, when suddenly the door to the lounge swung open. Max walked in, his expression immediately darkening when he saw you with Daniel.
"What are you two laughing about?" Max snapped, his tone harsher than usual.
You glanced at Daniel, who raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Just talking about snacks, Max," he said casually. "You should join us."
Max ignored Daniel's invitation, his eyes fixed on you. "Y/N, shouldn't you be working? We have media obligations today."
The mood in the room shifted instantly. You felt a pang of frustration and decided you couldn't take his attitude anymore. "Max, can I talk to you for a minute?" you said, standing up and gesturing towards a quieter corner of the room.
He hesitated but followed you, his demeanour still cold. "What is it?" he asked, crossing his arms.
"Why have you been treating me like this?" you demanded, your voice a mix of anger and hurt. "I've tried to be nice and helpful, but you keep pushing me away. What did I do wrong?"
Max looked taken aback, his eyes searching yours. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "You didn't do anything wrong, Y/N. It's just… I honestly don't know how to act around you, you're always so happy and nice to everyone. And then there's me. People think I'm rude, and maybe I am. I just… I didn't know how to handle you."
You frowned, not understanding. "What do you mean?"
He looked down, his usual confidence wavering. "I like you, Y/N. More than I should. And I thought you were too good for me. You're always smiling, making friends with everyone, and here I am, this grumpy guy who doesn't fit in with that."
You stared at him in shock, the pieces slowly falling into place. "Max, you can't just push people away because you're scared. I didn't know you felt this way. If you had just talked to me…"
He finally met your gaze, his eyes softer now. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I didn't know how to deal with it."
Your heart skipped a beat at his confession. "Well, you could start by not being so rude," you said with a small smile. "And maybe we can figure this out together?"
Max's tense posture relaxed, a hint of a smile appearing on his face. "I'd like that."
You nodded, feeling a sense of relief and excitement. "Good. Now, let's get back to Daniel before he starts planning our trip to Australia without us."
Max chuckled, and for the first time, you saw a glimpse of the warmth beneath his tough exterior. As you walked back to join Daniel, you couldn't help but feel hopeful for the future, both professionally and personally, with Max by your side.
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queenslackerr · 3 months
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"Sleep." (Astarion x reader pov fluff)
After nearly 200 years without any real respite, Astarion felt annually pampered by the tranquility his dead-life brings now to him. Sleeping. And he’s discovering this wonder.. while sleeping.
He turns a lot, quickly and very suddenly. To the point where his subtil, but rough movements gave you the scares once or twice. Sometimes, he mumbled things, some quiet garbled sentences, often ending on a random word.
His lips slightly parted, his cute but dangerous fangs pointing out as a quiet purr escaped his mouth. Those nights were more or less enjoyable, but you weren’t against the idea of being with someone, being with him. He never touched you. Contact we’re silently forbidden. You got it. You knew it was hard for him. You never expected anything, or waited after him for something in particular, which was, by all means, making it easy to shift the tense atmosphere to one where it felt almost tender and sweet. The only thing you wished for silently, was for him to stay with you. So many years of baggage trailing behind you, a boulder written loneliness on it, a silent burden that you never dared to talk about to anyone.
The first nights with him were calm and cold. Astarion masked often, pretending to sleep, anchored firmly by himself in the corner of the bed, closing slowly his eyes for the simple sake of relaxing them. He was simply not ready to allow himself to feel so vulnerable in this state, not next to you or whoever else, something that you had a lot of respect for. He stopped pretending, shifting his attention to you when he realized you weren’t sleeping most of the time. And when you did, he found himself staring at you when you whimpered quietly through the night in your dreams. Sometimes, he realizes he stops breathing until you cease your littles shakes and those sad little sounds. Not that he needs to breathe, of course.. But the fact that he does it with.. such.. no.
Despite his own denial, his words became gradually less mean, harsh and without him noticing, or at least, not on the spot. He often stayed awake with you, and you whispered to each other about anything and everything. Your dreams, fears, needs, stories, gossip.. He discovered one thing leading to another, such a sweet, nice and patient person, full of dreams and ambitions. Although, he easily recognized the sorrow twitching at the corner of your lips sometimes when you spoke, late at night, a little bit more open, a little bit more vulnerable next to him. A connection settled it between the both of you after your laughs, little screams of joy and even your fights - only to know who would take the pillow tonight (him, lol).
Once Astarion understood that your intentions were, frankly, far from being vile and that you never asked or expected anything from him, trust began to sprout rather quickly to this point. With more nights and more time spent with him, there are two things the vampire was in hunt for : heat and comfort your body provides.
Oh! And now that a well-established mental and physical comfort zone was made for both of us, Astarion had no respect for your personal space, having his leg on your back while he slept in star-shaped, an arm over his eyes as he snored quietly.
That night, you woke up, dreamless, sleepless like a countless time before. You blinked softly in the middle of the night, watching a small and soft dancing light at the back of the tent on the pretty nightstand. Astarion adopted a new habit : keeping a small candle lit so he could sleep properly. The reasons are obvious, even if he never spoke about it, not that way. That was the only way he could allow himself to finally sleep next to you, safe and sound, unafraid. It was a favorable environment, because you gently leaned and lifted a pretty book of his off the ground, deciding to distract yourself as your favorite rogue snored quietly, sweetly, half sleeping on you with no remorse.
You were used to him moving a lot, but that night, he was unstable like a kid that ate too much sugar before going to sleep, his muscles moving by reflexes in his dream state. He groaned a lot, grabbed your leg, holding it almost as a side pillow, then woops - never mind - turned around, pulled the covers to wrap himself firmly, throwing it away after only two single minutes. You tried to hold back some snorts and some quiet giggles. But you sometimes glanced back at him with worry, figuring out if he was having a nightmare. You nodded gently after a while. He was just a very light and maybe a tad violent sleeper. Well, that’s what you tought of the whole thing, at least. But for him? He was simply longing unconsciously for something to hold.
You were reading his book, turning the pages so quietly as you tried not to wake him up. Everything was sweet and quiet for at least a small second before you heard the sheets shifting. You turned very slowly towards him, lowering your book, holding it next to your waist. You blinked nervously and had a shy smile as you saw him, dropping it as quickly as it came as you saw the facts:
Astarion was sitting in the bed, rubbing his eyes with both of his hands for a moment. He stopped as he lowered his hands and glared at you. Frustrated. Angry, even. You wondered if you woke him up as you shyly watched him, not sure what to do. You started to stutter some apologies and a small, very quiet :
“-..is everything alright..?”
He still watched you, the same gaze on his beautiful and perfect features, not doing anything at all. After a while, he exhaled a loud sight, noticing the uncomfortable position he left you in. His leg graciously lifted off your back and his feet stomped the ground once, making a loud thud that made you shivered. A moment passed as you both watched each other. Suddenly, he shifted slowly, lazily towards you, his eyes wandering on your body for a moment. His gaze found yours again and he blinked slowly, almost as if he were asking a question without talking. You raised gently an eyebrow as you smiled shyly again. He suddenly shoved an arm under yours, making you yelp as he yanked your arm, your book falling, Astarion leaning back with you in his previous position. He sighted happily as you half-fell on him and turned so you could lean on the bed as he faced you. Everything next happened so softly it almost made you cry. He wanted to hold you, so he moved your limbs gently but still firmly so you were more comfortable this time. He shifted close to you, a hand on your back as he cradled your head, pulling you closer to him. He boldly pulled a leg over yours, just for his own personal comfort, grinning a little. He softly whispered as you fluttered your eyes shut.
“Sleep.”
Hello, i'm new and probably not very good at writing and this is the first thing i've done since a couple of years (i'm not speaking english very well also lol) but it's just a sweet tought i had of Astarion aw a pov. Very cute and funny in my little hamster mind. That's it!
ta-ta!
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cod-fishing · 10 months
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Thinking about Price being possessive over his boys. Not romantically or sexually (he likes to tell himself), but any time Soap starts chatting about some bear he met in a bar during leave, or Gaz mentions a girl who gave him her number, he can feel himself bristle. He tries to bury it, but it only gets worse after Las Almas, their bonds forged in far too much blood, and he struggles to bite down discouragement for any connection outside their little family.
When soap and ghost finally get together, he can’t figure out which of them he wants to throttle, but the sensation is intense nonetheless. Enough that he can’t stop himself from ordering them to his office and dressing them down so meticulously his old drill Sargent would be proud. They both look defiant. At perfect attention, military perfect in their stance, but fire in both of their eyes. It’s only when Soap, jaw clenched, demands if Price is going to transfer them that the Captain falters.
He sits heavy into his chair, and orders his boys at ease.
“I could never let go of either of you,” he finds himself gritting out through cigar smoke and choking emotions, far too unfiltered, “I just don’t want you boys to get hurt.”
He sees them soften, understanding. Not expecting a real answer, Price asks them their intentions with one another. He doesn’t want either of them to hurt the other, and while he knows they both have hearts of gold, they’ve got a lot of thorns as well. But they talk, and Soap is his usual genuine self and Ghost- Simon, really - is more honest and open than Price has seen him be ever, so…
He says okay. But keep me updated, he says. The good and the bad. They nod, and he assumes he’ll have to pry information out of them, and they move on.
Miraculously, they do keep him updated. Soap comes knocking one day, and Price asks about those reports he sent him off with and Soap says, aye, captain, got those for you, but ah…can I tell you something sweet Ghost did for me today? He’s bursting with joy when Price looks at him properly, and how can he say no to that?
Ghost, too, comes in one day, and asks to speak with the captain. Need some advice, sir. Johnny wants to take me home to his family for the holidays and I’m feeling real conflicted, he says. And they talk it out, fingers playing with the rims of their whiskey glasses. Price gets this feeling in his chest, likes he wants to reach out and trace his fingers somewhere else, but he ignores it.
It keeps happening that way, Price getting deeper and deeper in their relationship. He knows everything about the two together - almost everything. Ghost is on a solo mission one day and soap is moping, and so price pulls him into his office with the intention of getting him plastered and making him go to bed.
Instead, Johnny gets talkative. He should have known.
“God, Price, you wouldn’t believe the things he can do with his mouth. His fingers, too, lord knows where he learned it, but it’s like he took a fucking class on making me cum just from the teasing alone.”
“You’ve heard his voice captain, I mean no wonder I was creaming my pants to be with him so bad, and boy was I right. Downright evil how good it sounds during and early morning shag.”
And, even worse than all that, somehow…
“Well you know me, I like to be the best. So I told him we should start training my throat, so I can actually take his monster cock, the bastard. Did pass out the first time but we’ve been taking it slowly but surely ever since.”
And Price just…he should shut him up, but instead, he just takes it. Just lets the lad ramble about his love, like some lass back at home pinning for her deployed soldier. He hates it, he hates it, he tells himself. But he takes it for Johnny, and for Simon, and for the trust they have put in him.
And when he fists his cock in his quarters later that night, aching from being hard for so long, he can’t help but picture all those filthy things Soap told him.
Maybe, all this time, he was just jealous.
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