#Dick Tim and Damian made their own gang of kid heroes

[nenehyuuchiha]

I love reading fanfics with deaging/time travel robin Jason cause it always goes like:

Jaybin: I'm Robin and being robin gives me magic 😊✨

Batfamily: *going through all the stages of grief in a second* 💀

[cephalog0d]

Okay, but like. There's the whole joke about Bruce recruiting children to be his sidekicks, but honestly there's only really one that fits that.

And it's Jason. And the whole story there is, frankly, unhinged. Aaaaand then he died.

(I'm specifically talking about "first post-crisis origin stories" here because Jason and Dick, in particular, have both had multiple major retcons and revisions over the years, and some of them dramatically change how things happened.)

Like okay. Going backwards, you've got Duke who joined/led a whole Robin-based gang at a time when Bruce wasn't even Batman. You've got Damian and Cass, who were both literally born into the world of masks and capes and heroes and villains, so they weren't ever really not going to be part of it. Steph might have taken inspiration from previous heroes but she made her own identity and repeatedly refused to stop involving herself in the vigilante lifestyle. Tim, obviously, basically strong-armed Batman into letting him be Robin, despite Batman's protests.

Dick's a little more complicated just because there's so many versions, because that's what 80 years of comics and multiple universe reboots will do, and there's kind of a general trend that earlier pre-crisis versions were more of Batman being like "hello, child, would you like to be my sidekick" and later versions have leaned harder and harder into the idea that Dick was absolutely going to do this anyway, regardless of what Batman had to say about it. But even in the first post-crisis version, the flashback in Batman Year 3, Dick says he wants to find a way to keep people like that from hurting others again. When Alfred questions Bruce's offer to train him, Bruce says that Dick should learn to do things the right way if he's going to do it. It's not hard to extrapolate that, much like later versions of the origin story, Dick was going to get himself into this one way or another. (Batman (1940) #437)

And then there's Jason. Whose backstory has also had a lot of (sometimes major) revisions over the years (remember when his adoption was, like, some kind of Joker-originated long con? Fucken Nu52, man). But the original post-crisis version is pretty straightforward. Steals Batman's tires, gets caught and sent to Ma Gunn's Secret Criminal School, intervenes when Batman goes to investigate, immediately gets offered the chance to be Robin based entirely on that.

Which is itself kind of unhinged. That Bruce saw this kid who was living on his own stealing tires and went "Hey you would make a good Robin" as his very first instinct.

But if you've never read Jason's post-crisis origin, or it's been a while, it's honestly even more unhinged than that because that arc starts with Dick getting "fired" as Robin specifically for the reason that he got shot by Joker and Bruce freaked out about how the Robin identity has too many enemies and therefore Dick, a legal adult with approximately a decade of training and experience, should not use the identity anymore.

(And it's specifically about the Robin identity, in this version, because when Dick says he's not going to stop the crime fighting thing Bruce's response is basically "I know and I didn't expect you to". Honestly I could also say a lot about this version of the Robin/Nightwing transition vs. later ones and how this one definitely feels like the Heavy Hand of DC Editorial in the fact that they had no contact for so long afterwards, because the interaction really doesn't feel like it warrants that in this case compared to some later versions, but that's a whole other too-long ramble.) (Batman (1940) #408)

And then a few weeks later Bruce turns around and picks up a random kid, a literal child, and goes "Hey you would make a good Robin!"

And I think a lot about how fucking wild that is. And it's not like the people writing just didn't notice. Dick's big argument with Bruce when he finally comes back to Gotham and meets Jason isn't about the fact that Bruce took in another kid, or even necessarily about Dick feeling proprietary over the Robin identity, the thing he's angry about is that Bruce said it was too dangerous for him, an adult, someone who has trained with Batman for a decade and was already highly physically trained before that for his whole life, to be Robin, and now Bruce has turned around and painted that target onto some random new kid. He pushes, repeatedly, trying to get Bruce to justify himself and this absolutely irresponsible decision, and Bruce gives a lot of answers about how Jason was on a bad path and needed this outlet and eventually just admits that he missed having a partner. (Batman (1940) #416)

And like. Dick's right, is the thing. He is 1000% in the right in this argument. If he can't be Robin anymore because of the danger, how in the hell is it anything like a good idea to hand it over to someone way younger, way less trained, way less experienced, and expect that that wouldn't end in tragedy?

And then it did.

And yeah, Bruce, it is kinda a lot of your fault.

[starwarsmum]

Day 18's prompt is singled out!

@maribat-calendar-events

Tim had been working almost nonstop since arriving in Paris and he was pretty sure it was messing with his head. First, he still hadn't tracked down Hawkmoth, which felt like a failure on his part. Damian was being slightly cagey about the details of his investigation, which was hindering Tim's own.

Second, he was having trouble finding Ladybug. She never seemed to hang around after battles and she had started randomising her patrol a lot more. It was a smart move but it was very frustrating for Tim, who had planned to catch up with her during one of them.

The third thing that made Tim feel like his sleep deprivation was hitting a new high was Damian's behaviour towards Marinette Dupain-Cheng, the newly found half sister of their own adoptive sister, Cassandra Cain. Not only was he spending time with her but he had practically declared that he was interested in her romantically. To a roomful of strangers.

“He could be playing into a whole ‘Brucie’ thing while here,” Dick said when Tim voiced his concerns. Tim gave him an incredulous look before going back to typing furiously on his laptop. “Hey, I'm just saying that it's a possibility. The other option is that he's genuinely into her, so tell me which you think is more likely.”

“Whatever, let's focus on what we're covering with B and the gang,” Tim said, dismissing the conversation with a wave of his hand. “Demon Spawn hasn't exactly been forthcoming with the information he's supposedly gathered whilst he's been here.”

“As if you don't keep information back when you're working a case!” Dick argued, giving Tim a look. “He's doing fine, he says he's got it under control. And I'm sure he'll be back in time to cover all of this himself anyway; when has he ever been late?”

But apparently there was a first time for everything, because when the call started, Damian was nowhere to be found. Tim covered as much as he could whilst sending the occasional pointed glare at Dick to let him know he told him so.

It wasn't until twenty-eight minutes later that Damian stalked into the room, making no mention of his tardiness and giving a brief description of the status of his investigation. Before Tim could jump on him, Jason decided he wasn't going to let the kid get away with waltzing in half an hour late without an apology.

“Yo, Demon Spawn, what gives?” Jason demanded, glaring into the screen. “Don't get me wrong, we've all been late before, but since you throw a fit every time it happens to one of us, you could at least explain yourself.”

Damian was silent for a few moments and if Tim didn't know better, he would think that he was coming up with an excuse on the fly. But that couldn't be it because when Damian was on a mission, he lived and breathed for it. So, wherever he had been, it would have been mission related. Why was the kid so dead set against telling them anything.

“I was…speaking with a former temporary hero,” Damian said slowly. His eyes flickered towards Cass's screen in something like an apology. “The girl with whom I was photographed earlier in the week was a temporary hero called in as a last resort. She has not been asked to use the Miraculous since, but she does have vital information for the investigation.”

“And why did Dick and Tim not tell us that?” Bruce probed, showing that he had noticed the lack of information given about his youngest's absence. There was a very telling silence following the question and Bruce sighed. “Damian, you have a team with you to make things easier. You should be telling them what's going on in your investigation.”

“Tt, yes father. I apologise for my tardiness and will make an effort to be more open with the progress of my investigation,” Damian said, although it looked to Tim like he was forcing the words out. “Now, if we are finished focusing on me, perhaps we can return to the problem at hand?”

The rest of the meeting was fairly straightforward, although Tim saw Cass frowning at Damian several times. He didn't want anyone to know that he'd spotted it, so he didn't mention anything amiss and, when the meeting ended with Damian asking to speak with her, Tim made a show of saying he was going to get some sleep.

Dick followed him out of the room, presumably to make sure he did actually go to sleep and not to pick up another cup of coffee. If Tim wasn't so interested in what Damian was going to say to Cass, he would probably be annoyed at the way Dick was hovering over him. 

He made a shushing motion at the older man, who raised an eyebrow at him but complied. They settled next to the vent system in the adjacent room, listening quietly. For the first few moments there was silence but finally he started to pick up Damian's clipped tones.

“...pictures that will be released shortly. Marinette is concerned that you will be upset and I am…apprehensive of the same. I know I have mentioned to you previously that I admired her mental quickness and unwillingness to allow what she perceives to be unfair to continue.”

“You did,” came Cass's tinny reply, and Tim had to strain slightly to hear her. From what he could hear, she sounded amused, and he wished he could see the expressions on both of their faces. “I take it you finally acted upon the attraction you experienced when you first met her.”

Tim blinked at Dick, watching as an elated smile lit Dick's face. He was practically vibrating with joy and Tim had to shush him so they could hear Damian's reply.

“I- yes, I have communicated my desire to pursue a romantic relationship with her,” he admitted, and Tim would put money down that the brat was blushing. “You were aware?”

“Body language,” was the simple reply and Damian released a breath he had apparently been holding. “You mentioned pictures? Has someone else taken photos of you and Marinette out of context?”

“Tt, not quite. Marinette was asked to attend a photoshoot with our lead suspect's son. Whilst there, the photographer offered to take photographs to help set the media straight regarding Marinette's romantic history.”

“And you felt the need to warn me because…” Cass said, trailing off pointedly. Tim snorted involuntarily, remembering the poses Damian had been asked to do with Marinette. He heard Damian freeze in the other room and decided it would be in his best interests not to be found in the act of eavesdropping.

By the time Damian found both of his older brothers, they had relocated to the kitchen in their suite, arguing over whether an extra cup of coffee would send Tim into overdrive. He shot Tim a poisonous look and Tim just grinned broadly back at him. Knowing he had already been caught meant that he could needle his brother.

“A romantic relationship, huh?” Was the only thing he got to say before Damian launched himself over the kitchen counter. Tim cackled as a disapproving - but clearly very happy and proud - Dick pried the younger boy away.

[theogygiaisland]

Reverse!Batkids could be fun if it's made with the characters in mind

This post made me think a lot about REVERSE!Batkids a lot and how the characterization could be backwards and I feel like no one really gets how closer to GoodDad!Bruce it could be. Like it's focused on the Robins, yeah, but it should also revolve around Bruce's reverse characterization from canon (from angry man to caring father).

Like imagine: Damian is the first Robin (or not Robin as it's Dick's nickname) and he's still an assassin trained child-turned-vigilante. This world would show him how awful it is to be Batman and disillusions him from being 'son of the Bat' early on. He takes one look at Bruce's methods, brutal, efficient, cold and it reminds him of the league of assassins.

He didn't think he would upgrade when he came into Gotham, but at least in the LOA he fought opponents who were trained and not homeless men who stole $20 for dinner.

Damian follows the same path as Dick did, warring with his emotions and torn between continuing the legacy but also fighting to be his own person. He eventually leaves because Bruce failed at everything except sending him to the Teen Titans to socialize. Damian socialized and saw the world for its beauty, for the good that came outside of the LOA's brutality and Batman's recurring cynical nature.

Tim would come along when he sees Bruce is lost without Damian and offers to be Robin. Bruce doesn't accept at first (because the kid's not even his), but does so when Damian makes it clear he's close to disowning him until Bruce cuts out the savagery.

Damian hates Tim because how could he try to be a hero without training? Damian is league trained and the streets are still dangerous for him. A snot nosed rich kid would only get himself killed. The Joker sets a trap in Gotham. Damian tells Tim he can't confront the villain because he's not good enough (especially if he thinks Batman is doing good for the city) and Batman needed to gather more information on what Joker is trying to do. Tim tries to join them anyways.

This eventually does get Tim killed, not-killed, and dumped into a Lazarus pit because the LoA didn't see Tim as a leverage on Batman (Bruce didn't seem like he cares enough), but because Tim's mind can be an asset against Damian. Red Hood appears in Gotham, pit-mad, and systematically undoes the vigilante's influence by triggering gang wars and bribing cops. He doesn't do this to drive Batman into a confrontation (Tim doesn't care about another parent that didn't care for him), he does this to destroy the goodness Damian was looking for.

Robin 2's death would send Bruce to the opposite spiral, being more open with his emotions and learning how to be a father through Jason. He didn't know how to handle Tim and it drove him to his death, the next kid should know how valued he is to the family. It's not always perfect, but Jason makes him laugh when he doesn't think he could laugh again.

Jason absolutely is the reason Damian returns, not Bruce and if someone mentions it again he's still got that LOA knife in his pocket-

Damian does not become the older brother to him Dick had been in canon- but he ensures Jason is equipped with the best training to avoid another dead Robin. Jason laps it all up because 'wow someone's actually teaching me to fight good'. If Damian was less harsh in his teachings, well, it's just about time Damian accepted that you can't stop children taking to the streets so might as well equip them like how he failed to do so with Tim.

Red Hood!Tim would never develop the same morality as Jason because he didn't live as a street kid (outright murder would still be wrong for him), but he'd be hell bent on making sure he's everyone's problem by working with the system, the gangs, the corruption, the criminal underworld if in the end he gets what he wanted. But Tim would find nothing wrong if someone dies because the Riddler's latest bomb was set in someone's apartment. If it ruffles Damian's feathers then you bet Tim would release the Riddler due to a court ruling loophole.

In another world, a replacement Robin would fuel Jason's rage. In this one, Tim turns his anger into himself. When Jason gets adopted, Tim doesn't blink an eye. When Damian is shown on the tabloids picking Jason up from Judo practice, Tim nearly kills himself in rage. Instead, he goes and pesters the Teen Titans by breaching their security over and over again and sending Lex Luthor back doors to their systems.

Jason is still passionate about Crime Alley and hates that Tim does not care about the people he hurts and this is the major reason why Tim almost slits Jason's throat when Robin confronts Red hood.

Jason is still an emotional person. He gets over the hesitation and wariness about his adoption and thrives in the family. He understands Bruce's and Damian's guilt over not saving Tim. Bruce admits his faults. Damian admits to his attitude. Jason is overwhelmed by their (his family's) emotions enough that his bullheadedness shows.

So Jason tries to bring Tim home through various traps (telling the prostitutes down Lincoln ave about an upcoming gang was easy, the warehouse confrontation with Red Hood wasn't). It takes a year before Tim sets foot in the manor, but only for Alfred's cooking I swear to God Jason if Damian is here I'm setting the Brain on his friends-

He stays because Bruce cards his fingers through his hair and apparently it feels nice?

Dick comes along, a little boy who's got a bone to pick with Zucco. He's not rainbows and sunshine- he's a traumatized little kid who wants to kill a man and the motive to do so. Bruce loves him anyways, openly, as much as he can, but still trying.

Damian smiles at him, remembering his own childhood, and finally becomes a big brother. Dick comes into a family, a dad who's vocal about his love for his kids, an eldest brother who's love is shown through his hesitance to stab you, another older brother who has C4 strapped under everyone's bed as a safety net, another brother who will sit on you while he reads but will punch the bully if he finds them bullying you-

But Bruce still doesn't know how to stop him from donning red, green and yellows and taking to the streets.

[sohotthateveryonedied]

so i’m trying to write duke and i don’t think i’m writing him right. how would you describe his personality because with don’t trust fanon lmfaooo

(this was only supposed to be a paragraph or two i swear to god)

1. first things first, duke is a hardcore gryffindor. don’t let the yellow color scheme mislead you, okay. and while most of the time he’s depicted in fanon as “omg this family is crazy and i’m the only sane one,” it’s actually pretty much the opposite? if anything, i think the other batkids would be like “oh finally, someone who can match our level of chaotic energy. HEY DUKE WANNA BUNGEE JUMP OFF WAYNE TOWER—” and an hour later they’d all be in the batcave getting lectured by bruce for leading poor sweet innocent duke astray when really he was already planning on doing that this weekend.

listen, this is the kid who once jumped off a bridge to escape police. this is the dude who decided to fight criminals while they’re still eating their wheaties at 6am in a bright yellow suit. and while duke seems to be the best at following bruce’s command at the moment due to having been trained by him most recently compared to the others and is still figuring out how to be a hero, i’m positive that if bruce weren’t here to guide him, duke would be running around gotham taking down criminals anyway. i mean, he literally did do that with the “we are robin” kids. plus there was the whole thing when he was like ten years old and decided “i am going to singlehandedly stop the riddler in my light up sketchers and pikachu backpack. try and stop me.” 

duke is headstrong and has a strong drive toward heroism. he’s an extremely enthusiastic and passionate person in general, and i try to capture a little of that when i write him, even with mundane things like trying to beat his siblings to the last cupcake. 

2. another thing i noticed is that duke swears like a sailor in comics? seriously, this boy could give jason a run for his money with how many “@#!%” speech bubbles there are. i don’t know if this is just a trend the writers added in the comics i’ve read of him, or if it’s a genuine trait throughout every comic he’s in, but that’s something to make note of when writing dialogue for duke. after all, he did grow up in the narrows, so it makes sense that he’d use a lot of swearing and slang in his everyday vernacular.

3. i would also make a point of noting that duke is fairly young compared to the rest of the batfamily, being the second youngest after damian. duke is still a teenager in high school, and he acts like it. he’s got homework and friends and is eager to make a difference in gotham, trying to juggle everything and make it all work somehow. he’s stubborn and doesn’t give up easily, so it’s important to write him as someone who is trying to save the world while also struggling with finding time to study for his next math test. he's human. he doesn’t get to dedicate all of his time to fighting crime like cass or jason might be able to, since duke is still a mostly normal teenager with teenager problems.

4. and don’t forget that unlike the other batkids, duke still has two living parents. sure, they’re jokerized and might not ever be the same again, but they’re alive and that’s what holds him back from letting himself get as close to the waynes as he wants to. duke won’t be calling bruce “dad” anytime soon, and i think he’d have some internal struggle over stuff like holidays and birthdays with the waynes, remembering what his parents are missing out on and wondering if joining the wayne family is a betrayal to them. duke is very conflicted over this, even if he doesn’t say it directly. stuff like ducking out of movie night early or feeling a bittersweet pang during thanksgiving dinner makes sense for someone in his situation. 

(i usually ignore that aspect in my fics because i want duke to just be adopted and part of the family already, but not everyone does that, and that’s perfectly fine.)

5. honestly, duke is such a caring individual and we as a fandom need more of him being a shoulder for people to lean on because he’s?? so soft?? duke can be so sympathetic and rational when it comes to emotional problems. it seems like duke internalizes every bit of advice he gets from the people around him and uses it to inspire others and help them through their own problems. as tough and hotheaded as duke can sometimes be, he really is good when it comes to emotions.

6. duke is a smartass. he will 100% use sarcasm against any and every authority figure he meets, usually just for the hell of it. 

7. he’s very frank in general, usually the first to be like “okay full disclosure, we’re about to die right now. that sucks. anyway—” in a situation. he’s honest and tends to be upfront about his fears/anxieties, usually for comic relief, but i think it still counts.

8. okay i have to add that duke is also kind of a punk? he and jason have a lot in common because of this: they both grew up in one of gotham’s worse areas (jay in crime alley and duke in the narrows) and they’re both highkey deliquents. duke has no problem getting into fights or talking back to authority figures, and it’s gotten him in hot water on more than one occasion. it’s why he kept getting moved around the foster system before bruce took him in because no one wanted to keep him.

9. he’s also gotten so close with the other batkids and we love to see it!! duke calls cass “sis” and treats damian like the annoying little brother he never had and i adore every second of it. we haven’t gotten a lot of interactions between duke and the others aside from training and stuff, but he and jason have the whole “punk kid who got adopted by batman and is baffled by how rich people live” going for them, so they can bond over that. and duke is a thinker like tim, so they can hang out and do puzzles or play chess or whatever it is that smart people do. (and duke and steph are BESTIES i don’t care what anyone says.)

10. most of all, duke is still learning how the whole hero thing works. he’s young and he’s trying his best, but he also makes mistakes. he will be impulsive and screw up, and he’ll try and merge the lessons batman’s taught him and that his parents taught him and that other heroes teach him until it all makes sense in his own mind. duke isn’t experienced like dick or even damian, so he’s going to be lagging behind for a while until he grows until the role he’s made for himself.

other miscellaneous details to include: 

- duke is dating izzy, who used to be part of the “we are robin” gang with him - he used to live at the manor and now lives with his cousin jay, but honestly i just have him living at the manor in everything i write because i like it better that way - he can control shadows and light now! what a king! - duke secretly writes poetry and is good at creative writing in general  - this:

- duke is super smart?? he figured out that agent 37 was dick grayson without even trying?? i’m so proud of him - his biological father is this supervillain called gnomon so now duke has got four parents: his mom, his dad, his supervillain dad, and bruce (plus selina if you count her as the batkids’ stepmom, which i do) - jason calls him “narrows” and i love that

- and, lastly, the most important panel in the history of comics:

[bigskydreaming]

You're asked to choose one and only one or DC's future stops existing immediately. your choices:

1. Jason Todd the anti-hero who seldom works with only a couple of the bats he doesn't hate, for example Dick and Cass VS. Jason Todd who came back with healed body but broken spirit, folded back into the Gotham gang and learns to be part of the society again.

2. Tim Drake who makes all of his mistakes as canon but realizes he's been wrong and apologizes to people VS. Tim Drake back in his first iteration, a cute little brother character who is a reader insert and a fun teenager.

3. JayKyle VS DickKyle.

4. Jason Todd with a sword VS. Damian Wayne with a sword.

5. Chris Kent VS. Jon kent.

Okay but which DC future? Its omniversal future? Its hypertime future? Its multiversal future? Its Elseworlds future? Its dark multiverse future? Mwahahaha your threat is useless because the sheer wtf of DC's continuities, timelines and conflicting declarations of what to even call their multiomnihyperverse makes it impossible to target simply A future! DC's overly unnecessarily complicated nature renders it functionally immortal and impossible to ever truly destroy, take that Darkseid.

I mean. But anyway. Whatevs:

1) I honestly do prefer the idea of Jason someday fully reuniting/reintigrating into the Batfam as a whole, because fuck it, the found family I'm here for is the one where they actually act like a family....I just think it takes actual work to get to that point and I get irey when people are like we're here! We found it! And its like meanwhile, abusive dynamics still abound. Mmm. No thank you. But even though I've been on a huge Jason and Dick and Cass kick for like, forever, I do still aim for him having a dynamic of his own with the rest of the family.

Like the thing is, I hate playing the favorites card in families, and I think the emphasis on so and so being Bruce's favorite child or so and so being this kid's favorite sibling, etc, like it really does feel like to the detriment of the whole family, because once you start validating the idea of favorites, ESPECIALLY in a found family that is CONTINUOUSLY growing....I think you're kinda shooting yourself in the foot because you're kinda creating a situation where either no future new additions to the family can EVER be Bruce or one of the kids' 'favorite' or else you're innately positing that said fave status is conditional and even a current fave of Bruce or a sibling can be bumped down the ladder by the addition of a later arrival....

Which is LITERALLY the entire essence of the eternal conflict between Dick and Damian and Tim fans. Its not even that Damian is Dick's favorite, allegedly, its that prior to Damian's very EXISTENCE, fans felt comfortable declaring Tim unilaterally to be Dick's 'favorite'.....and then all it took was the addition of a single family member who had specific NEEDS in regards to Dick's attention and focus, largely because of his age and needing a legal guardian while Tim was old enough to literally jet set around the world on his own.....and like, everything went up in flames in large corners of fandom.

So I'm just like, death to the fave family member myth, its just incredibly counter productive to the idea of found family as a whole especially when it usually only exists to prop up a preferred character as better than others via the proof of see, these other characters say he's their fave or whatever...but also like, its not even necessary?

Because the thing is, you can have Jason reintegrated into the whole family overall, and still prioritize your personal narrative FOCUS on characters you like more than others, like say Dick and Cass.....because of course its natural for even people in the same family to have entirely different DYNAMICS with different family members....and these dynamics don't have to come with a ranking system in order to prioritize which ones you just focus on more in a story. Because its not necessarily that Dick has to be Jason's fave brother, y'know, just for Jason to prefer spending time with Dick simply because he's more comfortable with him due to knowing him longer or being more secure in the idea that Dick doesn't judge him based on their greater shared history.

This doesn't mean that Jason doesn't care for his other siblings, that he can't have strong dynamics with them as well, its just about finding a reason for why these two specifically might be in a story without the others that doesn't demand putting a definitive ranking on which one Jason considers his FAVE. Just like Damian doesn't have to be Dick's FAVE just for them to have the super close canon relationship they have, even relative to the other siblings, because there's everything needed in canon already to establish that the mere fact of Dick essentially RAISING Damian for a year, and being the first one in the family to really take a chance on Damian, like, this lends itself naturally to them maybe more naturally gravitating towards each other than other siblings due to comfort level and familiarity, etc, but it doesn't have to be like....oh but yeah, I just like Damian more than you, Tim, y'know?

So my answer on this one is a total cop out of both, both is good. Jason totally reintegrated back into the family, but with dynamics that still lend themselves fairly easily towards story lineups where its just him running missions with Dick or Duke or any other one or two specific family members even if for no other reason than they gel together best in the field, y'know?

2) Hmm. I honestly really do love and miss 90s Tim Drake and just....don't see him in a lot of what I read these days. I'm like no, why did he have to go, he was doing so well! BUT I'm also on a big accountability kick, and like, I'm so steeped in fics where Dick GROVELS for forgiveness for every little slight he's ever done real or imagined, with every character but Tim in particular, so its like.....I'm not gonna lie, I really have a preference these days for seeing stuff where its literally anyone actually owning up to shit they've done to Dick and apologizing or groveling or making it to HIM, like, completely unconditionally. In the same manner we usually see Dick apologizing, glossing over any reasons he might have had for doing what he did or feeling the way he did, and saying oh it doesn't matter, putting the entirety of his focus on what HE did and why it was wrong no matter what and he's sorry.....that's what I would kill to see from more fics, just in reverse.

Because so often even in the all too rare fics where we DO see other characters apologizing to Dick for shit, its watered down with Dick volunteering that oh he messed up too, it was a two way street, and its like no! This is Pettiness Hours! I want the unconditional apologies! Give me the groveling! From anyone, I don't care at this point, lol, just show me characters actually PUTTING IN THE WORK to make it up to Dick for harm they've caused him, even if completely unintentionally or via neglecting his feelings or considering the repercussions their actions or words would have on him. Aaaaaaand, frankly, Tim's a good place to start there, because of how one sided all the takes on their conflicts have been for so many years. I mean, if people need a place to start, Batman and Robin Eternal gets enough praise it can't be pretended that people in fandom don't know that story exists, so how about some stories where Tim says he's fucking sorry for punching Dick in issue #4 or #5 of that one, and it was uncalled for and he was clearly just looking for an excuse to unleash some more of his resentment and upset for the Spyral/Forever Evil stuff, and family deciding that its totally okay to punch Dick whenever they're mad at him and need to work off some aggression so they can then finally forgive him (for now) is a trend that needs to die in a fire post-haste? I mean just as an example.

But the thing that kills me about fanfic trends is like....the sameness of so much of it. There's SO much room for variety and diverse takes, and like....I don't actually hate Tim! I'm just cranky because of the imbalanced nature of most content out there for literal years at this point. Push the pendulum BACK in the other direction, create some balance by showing the flip side of things.....and that leaves a lot more room for me and others of like minds to then be more amenable to - and even interested in - other stories that don't scratch this particular itch, but don't need to, because other stories are doing the scratching by then, y'know?

And THEN like, at that point, I would be ALL FOR more stories that are just callbacks to classic 90s Tim who I adore, with his skateboarding and his EARNESTNESS and his go-get-em spirit and also the gumption. All the gumption. I like that Tim. I do miss that Tim. But like, for the moment, like, I want accountable Tim because I am tiiiiiiiired of groveling Dick and tbh at this point its not enough for me to just see people move past putting Dick in that position and just have mutually respective and doting brothers Dick and Tim having adventures together......nah, first I want some reciprocation. Ngl. Gimme the apologies for actual mistakes actually made.

3) DickKyle. Easy question, c'mon, you gotta know that. LOL. ;)

But yeah, I've been shipping these two off their like, two shared pages from way back in the Obsidian Age story years before Jason even returned, let alone was in Countdown together with Kyle, so like, its no contest. I don't mind JayKyle, I certainly prefer it to JayRoy tbh, but there's not a ton of appeal in it for me, particularly in how its usually depicted, because like....the entire basis of JayKyle is that they DO have stories together and spent a whole year worth of weekly issues traveling the multiverse together in Countdown.....but there's like, practically no trace of their actual dynamics from that series or any specifics of literally any issue from that entire comic in most fics I’ve read, so its like.....idk, it tends to come across as more generic, not in the sense that it cant still be interesting, but more in the sense that it feels like just someone paired with Jason just because history between them EXISTS without any interest in exploring what that history actually IS....and at that point, its like, well there's no reason TO prioritize that ship over DickKyle for me personally, when like, I have a shit ton of headcanon reasons for why those two in a pairing specifically. *Shrugs* My logic. Its not for everyone, but it works for me.

4) Jason with a sword or Damian with a sword? I don't understand the question. Both. Both is good. All the characters should have swords. Swords are awesome.

5) Chris Kent vs Jon Kent - oof. I adore Jon, I really do. I love his dynamic with Damian, I love a lot of their specific stories, the parallels between them as friends and Bruce and Clark as friends....its all very bien. But I gotta give this one to Chris, because I'm always gonna have a soft spot for him because I'm a sucker for all abused kid heroes, and I just miss that funky little dude so much. There's so many stories we didn't get with him and were just ripe for the picking, but nooooo, DC's like lol you can't have nice things, here we just rebooted the entire multiverse and now Clark and Lois never adopted the son of Clark's worst Kryptonian rival and raised him with tender love and care awww does that make you sad, were you invested in him, WELL TOO BAD, HE'S GONE NOW AND BASICALLY NEVER EXISTED, NOW GIVE US YOUR MONEY ANYWAY MWAHAHAHAHAH.

Yeah. I'm still not over that. Probably will never be tbh, so I with great grudge-bearing do affirm that I'm gonna go with Chris on this one and like, he is a Priority for me and I'm still very keen on the idea of him and Duke being besties for random reasons that might not make sense to anyone but me, but eh, whatever.

[artxyra]

If you're still taking requests, I got another one! So, Marinette was out getting icecream, but got chased by a guy for a mile. Nobody was near until she reached a park. Damian is by a tree when he saw her. Marinette goes up to him and acts like they're dating and makes an excuse. While pretending to clean his face she explains and Damian decides to play along, but his brothers hear and see everything. After the guy is gone Mari asks to get coffee, they start dating, then explain to the fam.

Note: Alright school is no officially over. Stress levels are down and now I’m battling the mindset of wanting to do nothing when I want to do something (yay summer brain). I hope you enjoy. Might make small changes here and there.  

Have anyone told Marinette that she would find her forever by running away from a stalker, she would have awkwardly laughed in their face and run off into the distant. Well, that is exactly what happened.

Her day was simple, she had a commission that was due any day now, a paper to write for a class assignment, and had to help her parents with the bakery. So, when she began to feel accomplished for the day, she decided that getting ice cream would be the best reward during this nice day. Originally, she was going to invite her closet friends to join her but knowing them they always have plans when she needed them the most, so that made her decision clear.

Walking down the familiar path to the nearest ice cream parlor, Marinette hums the latest Jagged Stone hit song. Had she paid attention to her surrounding, she would have seen a large silhouette off to the distant following her for the past block.

Paying for her strawberry ice cream cone, Marinette was on cloud nine. The cold dessert in her mouth felt like all she did today was worth it. Sadly, that ice cream cone only stayed in her hands for a moment before following to ground.

The ice dessert melts away as a shadow looms in the background.

Had someone told Damian al Ghul Wayne that he would meet is forever by pretending to be her boyfriend, he would have slit someone’s throat and told them to never talk to him again. If only that was the case.

The Wayne family decided to come to Paris, France to talk about expanding the business overseas. Bruce had been in meetings all day alongside Tim which left Damian at the mercy of the most annoying of active brothers, Dick, and Jason. He wishes that his sister would join them, but they opted to stay in Gotham in case their active villains decided to run rapid with the Bats temporarily gone.

Damian also wishes that they had brought Titus, as the Great Dane would have loved the open park to enjoy, but instead, the dog is in the hands of Alfred back at the manor.

Everything was fine until a hand touch on his shoulder causing him to reach for his hidden knife.

“Please pretend to be dating me, someone has been following for that last mile.” A voice told him in French. He turns to see a panic teen around his age looking at him with pleading eyes. Side glancing to the side, he sees a silhouette looming over the fence staring in his direction. Tsking, Damian lowers to her ear and whisper, “Qui.” The girl’s eyes widen, and she grips onto his arm tighter.

“I’m so glad I found you, mon amour. You should have come with me to get ice cream; you would have loved it.” She said loud enough for her voice to carry across the park.

“I’m sure I would have, Angel.” He replies before guiding her over to the picnic set up that Dick had made before chasing Jason when the anti-hero made crude jokes. He glances back over to the fencing; the silhouette is still lingering causing Damian to tsk again.

Picking up a sandwich, he hands it over to the mysterious girl, who takes it with a smile before ripping it apart and pretends to feed Damian. Begrudgingly, Damian takes a bite and pulls the girl closure in the process. Her eyes widen at the sudden gesture, but she relaxes as if it was second nature for her.

“We should do this more often; you know I love a romantic picnic in the park.” She says leaning into his chest. Oh, how much Damian hopes this doesn’t become a public outbreak.

“Angel, I’m sure we’ll have more dates like this. How about a sunset dinner next to the Seine?”

“I would love that.”

Together they pretend to be a happy couple. The stalker never leaving their sight. The girl was growing anxious as they continue to keep up their act. To Damian he wonders why he even agreed to be this girl’s pretend boyfriend, he never does something like this. Maybe it was the hero (excuse me vigilante) in him? He truly doesn’t know. The girl would glance back every ten minutes like clockwork as does he because the minute the stalker was out of sight, they would stop this charade and go on acting like they never meet.

For Marinette, this was a whole new feeling. The moment she felt something was off, she dashed away leaving the rewarded dessert. Looking back, she saw that she was being followed at a similar pace to her own. Her eyes dart around looking for someone that could potentially help her. She found no one. The streets practically dead, an odd sight for a city usually booming with life.

Marinette ran for over a mile, thank kwami for her Ladybug training, as she would have gone off the deep end and crash for how fast she was running. Coming closure to the park, she spots a dark-haired male standing overlooking the park. He was perfect. Glancing behind her, Marinette sees her chaser slowly closing the gap between them. Making a mad dash for the male, Marinette grabs hold of his arm and quickly explains the situation.

A wave of relief past through her when the male replies with a yes in French. Little did they both know, that yes locked their futures together.

Marinette swears that pretending to be someone’s girlfriend had to be the most stressful of jobs. The chaser didn’t leave for over an hour. She and the person she randomly claimed spoke about romantic dates, the scenery around them, and even ate someone else’s picnic meal. To which Marinette feels very bad about it.

Her cheeks flush red that could match her Ladybug suit when she ended up taking a napkin and wiping away crumbs of food. The male became stiff when she did that, but thankfully it was enough to get the chaser away from the park.

“I’m so sorry, I dragged you into that.” Marinette proceeds to ramble, getting a slight chuckle out of the male to which cause a loud gasp from two males from behind them.

“Did she really get the Demon Spawn to laugh?” The tall one in blue asks with wide eyes as if he just saw the biggest moment since whenever.

“Nah, I’m pretty sure she did some dark magic or something.” The one with a strand of white replied causing her pretend-boyfriend to tsk and look away.

“What are you two doing back. I would I thought Todd had killed you or something Grayson.” He said standing up and offering a hand to Marinette.

Marinette looks between the three males and awkwardly rubs the back of her neck. Her phone dings to life. The three males engage in a somewhat heated conversation, well it more like the two males ganging up on the pretend boyfriend.

“Shoot.” Marinette cries out looking over the message. She then quickly turns off her phone and gains the males’ attention.

Walking over to the male she spent the last hour with, she smiles and says, “How about I offer you some coffee as a thank you? But I really need to leave, so if you want some���” She tries to make sense of her conversation but ends up failing, badly.

“Tsk. Angel, I would love to take you on that offer,” He replies sending a chill down her spine, but it was a good chill.

“C’mon.” Marinette grabs his hand and they dash out of the park. “By the way, my name’s Marinette.”

“Damian.”

“Sweet, you’re going to love the coffee.”

Their first official date just so happened to be that Seine date they had pretended to plan just days before Damian was scheduled to return to America. They stayed in contact through Skype calls, text messages, and private social media accounts. It was Damian who invited her to Gotham just a year after dating and countless visits to Paris. Marinette took that moment to get to know his family and she was in a huge shock when she found out that he was the Damian Wayne from Gotham. The family, of course, had a good laugh that would go down in the family history books. Demon Spawn’s girlfriend had no idea who he was for an entire year of dating.

“Well kids, that is how your father and I met.” Marinette says tucking in the twins into their beds. Damian watch from the doorway with his arms crossed and a smile on his face. It was moments like these he is forever grateful for agreeing to say yes on that day. He found his forever just like she found hers.

Turning off the lights to their kids’ bedroom, Marinette takes Damian’s hand and kisses his cheek.

“You know the next time we go to Paris, let’s visit that park again.”

“Of course, Angel.”

Embracing each other, thy walk to the direction of their bedroom for the night.

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[miss-choco-chips]

hey so I had a quick question about twisted soulmates! so tim knows who his soulmates are, jason knows tim is his soulmate, damian thinks tim is his nemesis, but does dick know? do they all know about each other? love the story!!!

 (2/2)  I also love how you call ra’s a cheap kazoo at the end it really fits him

---

Hey sweetie! I’m glad you liked it. Twisted Soulmates has a very special place in my heart, it’s the first long-ish fic I wrote for the fandom and it’s received so much love, it amazes me. And yesss Ra’s totally is. I read that in a post I saw in Pinterest about someone saying that to “play someone like a fiddle” isn’t a fitting insult cause fiddles are hard to play and should instead say a kazoo, and I thought Tim would think so too.

So to clear the soulmate mess a bit.

….This got really really long so I’m gonna put it under the cut. Also, beware of spoilers of the possible second part!

 Dick knows Tim is his soulmate, but it doesn’t get directly addressed in the fic by anyone else than Tim, and that was on purpose. Dick didn’t get his mark at the same time Tim did. Or rather he did, but he was in costume and didn’t see his own wrist, and then his parents died and the trauma kinda fucked things up and the name got erased. Like, he repressed the whole thing so hard he forcefully forgot about Tim and removed him from his own body. That is, until Tim went to ask him to be Robin again, and when Dick touched him he was bitchslapped by the feeling of the name appearing on him.

But the thing is, Dick is a young man, emphasis on the ‘man’. And this weird little kid is, soulmate or not, a *kid*. Dick is uncomfortable as fuck in this situation. He gets fond of Tim with time, they become friends and he mentors him to make sure what happened to Jason won’t happen to him, but he’s very carefully keeping him at arm’s length in anything soulmate related, because he won’t ever see a twelve year old as some romantic partner just because some cosmic force says he’s destined to be that. Maybe in the future, maybe not, but certainly not when there is this age difference that creeps him the hell out. He has his relationships with other people, which Tim respects because he doesn’t think he has any say on the matter, and they honestly love and care for each other (Tim is crushing hard but he’s a teen and Dick is his hero, that would be expected even without the soulmate thing), and everyone kinda turns a blind eye to the whole thing (except from some of the Young Justice gang, but that’s another thing entirely). Sure, Dick’s girlfriends (or at least the ones that are in the know) look a lil uncomfortable when Dick takes them home and they meet this tiny, starry eyed kid who does his best to be polite, but except for that it might as well be a taboo. The most Dick does is when any danger comes near Tim and he outright freaks out, like when he got Ra’s mark and he flew all the way from San Fran just to fret, but, again, the do love each other, so that might or might not be because of their bond.

Jason as explained gets the mark when he’s attacking Tim at Titan’s Tower. He already had the Joker on his other wrist, so there was no place for doubt. That’s why he left Tim alive, instead of finishing the job like he intended to. The second attempt on Tim’s life was made under Pit influence, because Tim rejected his offer to be his Robin, which Jason’s highly damaged mind translated to rejection to him as a soulmate, which in turn made him really mad, and… yeah. He *does* want to get to know Tim properly and apologize, he felt awful about it all once his mind got cleared up, but like… regret doesn’t just erase all the pain he brought his soulmate, a fact he’s perfectly aware of. So when shit hits the fan with Tim and Dick, Jason is away on a self-discovery trip with the outlaws where he works through his issues, hoping to get himself to a place from where he could start a new relationship with Tim (only if Tim is cool with giving him another shot; he’s hopeful but not going to press, the decision will be firmly in Tim’s hands). He doesn’t know about Dick and Damian, but he does know about Ra’s because he once heard Talia ranting about his father being too ‘soft to his nemesis’, which got him curious enough to investigate. It makes him feel even worse, because the poor kid’s nemesis AND soulmate actively tried to hurt him, which… is really fucked up. So Jason is a hot mess right now, but he’s on the path of redemption.

Damian’s thing was another mess altogether. Damian hasn’t met his nemesis yet (I’m still not 100% sure who is gonna be for him), so when he gets to Wayne Manor and gets his mark as he’s hitting Tim… well, the kid’s been groomed to think of his Father’s other kids as enemies already, its not too much of a leap to consider Tim, his direct predecessor and the one he has to live up to, as his ultimate foe. He also knows about his Grandfather having Drake’s name, so his proud little head gets a high at the idea of having the same nemesis as Ra’s, like some kind of validation to him, like he could someday be equal to Ra’s if he has his same nemesis. Tim tries to correct him, but he’s also busy dealing with the fact that a ten year old is another one of his soulmates, and a murderous one at that, so he’s probably not explaining himself as well as he could, and Damian walks out of that encounter totally sure that Tim is his nemesis (he didn’t see Tim’s wrist, so as far as he’s aware, he’s on the same wrist as Ra’s and thus Drake’s nemesis). He doesn’t know about Jason, but he learns about Dick later on, after he becomes his Robin. They are bonding one night and Dick tells him about his soulmate and nemesis (he’s probably trying to explain something about morals and whatnot to him using that as an example), and Damian can’t even suspect of Dick having it wrong, because the one he claims as his nemesis is one of his worst foes, and no matter how bad, Tim couldn’t be worse than him, so, by elimination, Tim IS Dick’s soulmate. This freaks him out, badly, and he does his best to avoid telling Dick about his mark, because he is still sure about Tim being his nemesis, and that means he is destined to hate the one dick is fated to love; Dick would never choose him above Tim if he was aware of this. He’d never love Damian more than Tim, and that makes the child in him even MORE mad at Drake because jealousy.

So by the time Tim says ‘fuck it’ and basically elopes with Ra’s, Dick is unaware of Jason and Damian; Jason is also unaware of the other two; and Damian only has half the information.

They will find out about the others though (and in Damian’s case, about Tim being his soulmate instead of nemesis), when they find out about Tim’s disappearance (he’s with Ra’s but he’s not exactly advertising it so not a lot of people know where the fuck he is) and join forces to look for him. But that will happen in the second part, if I gather enough brain cells to write it lol

Also, a bit about Tim, if you’re interested!

Tim knows they are they soulmates- even when things get twisted when Ra’s, who is his nemesis, treats him better than the people supposedly destined to love him. Its very confusing, and while a part of him is sure of it, the other is like… maybe Ra’s is his destined one, after all. In the end, Tim decides it doesn’t really matter. Ra’s can be his nemesis, soulmate, whatever- he’s taking him down, hence the last scene where he smiles at having deceived him. And Dick, Jason and Damian might or might not be his soulmates- he doesn’t give a fuck either, he’s not gonna forgive them just because Fate winks at him and pushes him towards them. Oh no, hell no. He’s basically giving up on love, soulmates and all that jazz. He’s gonna use his unique position to do his best to take Ra’s down, even if that means he goes down with him, because he’s a very depressed boy who only feels something when in immediate danger, and sadly the most danger he can be in is inside the lion’s mouth- travelling around the world with Ra’s.

This got really long, anon, sorry! Hope you’re having an amazing day!

[taliaquinn]

Why Me!? Chapter 15

A/N: Sorry I took a while to update my peeps. Fun fact this chapter was originally over 2,500 words so I split it. After going through a massive edit it was still long anyways:). So Enjoy the fact that Chapter 16 is going to come out very soon, also more one shots will be posted. Check out the most recent one if you guys haven’t :)

“NO WAY,NO, ABSOLUTELY NOT,” Marinette yelped “SCREW SOCIAL INTERACTION!!!” leaping from the chair she immediately started pacing around.

“Marinette you have to go to School, you’re too smart and can't always be cooped up here.” As much as Bruce would love having his children to stay in the relative safety of the house “Besides you wouldn’t be alone Tim and Damian both go to Gotham Academy”

“B-but Bruce” he allowed shock to flood his body because finally his daughter wasn’t calling him Mr.Wayne. Uck. He knew Stark was still dealing with that problem with his own protege. “Gotham Academy is one of the most prestigious schools in the States not to mention expensive”

“Marinette, do you realize that the cost is nothing to me?” Oh god he went through this with most of his children, the whole "please don’t waste your money on me” routine. “it’s my job as a father to make sure my kids are safe AND are receiving a great education”

“The cost means a lot to me-hold up don’t they offer scholarships?” She asked a glimmer of hope in her eyes

“Yes but they are mostly for kids who otherwise wouldn’t be able to attend, The Wayne foundation offers a few, anyways you won’t be completely alone Tim and Damian both go to Gotham Academy” Bruce explained, Jesus all of his kids were so weird about money, well most of them, Damian and Tim were something else.

“Ugh Fine, what about my parents? Will they be okay with it?” No way would Maman and Papa allow it.

“Oh they already enrolled you, your mother just thought that I deserved the honor of telling you” he said rolling his eyes.

“WHAT!!!!”

Oh boy maybe he should have let Dick and Alfred handle this.

Cesaire Apartment                                                                                      Paris, France                                                                                            5:00pm

“Come on Think about it Nino, Marinette’s gone what could she do anyways?” Alya asked her boyfriend on facetime, unfortunately she and Nino couldn’t go out, both were stuck taking care of their siblings. Joy.

“Alya im not sure…... the article seems a bit too far, I mean Chat Noir hasn’t exactly been helpful lately, plus he HAS been acting rather childish lately,” Nino Responded, He might need glasses but that doesn't mean he was blind to the Chat Noir situation. He’s been distracting Ladybug and he hasn’t bothered showing up a few times to the Akuma Battles!!! Some hero. “Why not post the video of your interview with Adrien? That will instantly attract all of his uh eager fangirls” he offered

“Apparently sunshine boy has to ask his Dad for permission, so this article is the next best thing” The article she was referring to was in response to the video of Marinette lecturing Chat Noir. It wasn't as much fact based but opinion based

“Why are you still hung up on Marinette so much? She used to be our best friend”

“She's a bully, who constantly attacks Lila, and still hasn’t confessed to what she has done”

“What if it’s Lila who is lying?” Nino asked cautiously, he never knew what would set Alya off these days.

“Not you too, you know what? Maybe you should just switch classes like the rest of the traitors if you believe that” she scowled. “Go be on their side”

“Sides What sides? Alya there isn’t any sides”

“Yes there's the right side and the wrong side”

“What makes you so sure that we're on the right side?” Nino finally asked. He has been having his doubts. Something about Lila’s stories just wasn't adding up.

“You’re being Ridiculous Nino, You know what? I don't want to talk to you right now, you obviously won't listen” Alya screeched ending the call. Nino Stared at the dark screen with his jaw open in shock.

He’s being ridiculous?

It's his fault?

These last few weeks, Alya has been borderline unbearable. Nino found himself having to resist calling Marinette and asking her for advice.

On one hand it was out of guilt on the other hand some part of Nino already knew what she would say. She would tell him to break up with Alya. The relationship was getting far too toxic. He turned on his phone and clicked on Alyas contact. Thinking out his Message he finally typed the message he's been wanting to send for the last few days

Nino: Hey, I just don’t think this is working. This relationship is bad for the both of us. Ask Lila for help instead. Goodbye Al

Message Sent

Message Received

Wayne Manor                                                                                      Gotham,USA                                                                                                      8 pm

“Trust me Pixiepop Dick is the last person to ask for advice concerning school, Dickhead was smart, sure, but he also dropped out of college ” Jason explained to Marinette, who was mopping about school “He decided to enroll in the Police Academy instead, believe me Bruce was pretty pissed about that”

“B-ut it he quit to do something he actually likes, I doubt he actually wanted to be a businessman,” Marinette retorted. “speaking of which do you think he’s doing alright in Bludhaven?” She asked her voice laced with concern.

Jason knew for a fact that Dick wasn’t doing that great, he was pulling overtime as Officer Grayson and working the night as Nightwing, Bruce and Tim weren’t fairing that great either. The impending gang war was keeping most of the local vigilante community busy.

“I’m sure he’s fine pixie pop”

He was absolutely not fine.

Unbeknownst to them, Nightwing had walked right into an ambush inside a warehouse right next to Bludhaven Bay. With a few more hours of sleep Nightwing might’ve had a higher chance of winning , unfortunately he was running on 3 hours of sleep a night so he was getting quickly overwhelmed.

After one too many punches Nightwing finally put out a distress alert.

“Master Jason, You have a Call from Bludhaven Bay, Your friend there seems to be in need of your help”

“I’ll take it, Sorry Maribug seems like I have to head out right about now.” Jason he quickly answered. Fuck. Dick was in danger.

“Why?” Marinette asked puzzled, why not just take the call here? “Cause This dingwatt friend of mines only calls me if he’s in trouble or about to be”

“Can I come w-” Marinette was cut off by her phone chirping crap akuma.

“Actually you know what? Better not keep you” she said walking backwards towards the door “Stay safe Jay, see ya, toodles~”. She quickly exited and quickly walked towards her room.

“She's hiding something isn’t she Alfie?” Jason said after witnessing Marinette's strange departure

“It is blatantly obvious Master Jason, although I do believe she is permitted to do so seeing as how we all have our small secrets” Alfred said with a huff. His hopes for a normal grandchild have just been dashed. Maybe he will have better luck with great-children? Shaking his heads to clear his thought he and Jason quickly made their way towards the Batcaves entrance,

Jason stopped mid stride an odd feeling overcoming him “You feel that?” Jason asked feeling a rush of warmth

“Feel what Master Jason?”

“Nevermind let's go save Dickie-bird”

Welp I hoped you enjoyed today’s update :). Also I hope you guys have been taking care of yourselves. I know that it has been a bit different lately due to well everything. Please feel free to message me if you guys need to. Stay safe and healthy ❤️

Also if the text is a bit wonky i’m sorry, still learning all the tips and tricks

Taglist:

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[darkxknight]

IC INFO

Character Name: Bruce Wayne Alias: Batman Age: 45 Face Claim: Matt Bomer Species: Human Home Earth: Earth-49

History:

▸ Born the only son and child of Dr Thomas Wayne and Martha Wayne (nee Kane) in Crest Hill, Bristol Township, Gotham City, New Jersey. His parents were well respected within the community and gave Bruce a life of privilege as well as tried to instill a good moral code within him. His early childhood was quite idyllic until one night when his parents took him to the Monarch Theater where they saw The Mark of Zorro. After the film, a mugger named Joe Chill attempted to rob them at gunpoint, and panicked, shooting both Thomas and Martha dead.

▸ After the death of his parents, Bruce was raised by the family butler (and Bruce's godfather), Alfred Pennyworth. He was also checked in upon by one of Thomas' friends and co-workers, Dr Leslie Thompkins. He was allowed to remain in Wayne Manor under Alfred's care. He continued to attend school and excelled in his studies, but Bruce's primary focus was no longer that of a young boy. Tragedy had stolen what innocence he had.

▸ As time past, he became obsessed with learning the meaning behind his parents death. At the age of 18, Bruce used the relationship he had with a girl - who was the daughter of a mob boss - to locate Joe Chill. Bruce learned that there was no deeper meaning to his parents' deaths, Joe just simply needed money.

▸ Bruce took an avid interest in martial arts and sword fighting and after discovering what he had from Joe Chill, he decided to travel the world and expand his knowledge. At 21, he spent a great deal of time studying martial arts off masters like Shihan Matsuda in the Himalayas. He studied the ins and outs of technological gadgetry under the guidance of a brilliant inventor, Sergei Alexandrov. He also learned how to drive cars in life-or-death situations from Brazilian criminal, Don Miguel. Bruce also delved into criminology, chemistry, and even acting to hone his skills in becoming a one man army to bring justice back to his home city. He was gone for three years before he returned to Gotham.

▸ Upon his return to Gotham, Bruce wanted to keep it a private affair but his Uncle, Philip Kane, had other ideas. While Philip appeared happy his nephew had returned home, he was also dubious of the young Bruce and plotted against him behind his back. Bruce was able to obtain his inheritance, which was not only the Wayne family fortunes but also controlling power over the family's main corporation, Wayne Enterprises. Bruce had idealistic goals on how he wanted to run the company, which was a huge shake up to how the business had run since his parents death.

▸ Bruce Wayne became Batman. He took the fight to the Red Hood Gang and was immediately successful in defeating the criminals at the A.C.E Chemicals factory. During the fight, Bruce's Uncle, Philip Kane, was found out to be a secret member of the Red Hood Gang and was unfortunately killed in the battle. Red Hood One was also believed to be killed in the fight, falling into a vat of chemicals below where he and Batman had fought. 

▸ Despite leading a double life, Bruce kept up many public appearances so people were completely unaware of his nightly habits. One such outing was to The Haly Circus, where a fun night out turned into tragedy for the acrobat family known as the Flying Graysons. The only survivor of the family being the Grayson's son, Richard (or, as he preferred, Dick). Being able to sympathize with Dick's tragedy and knowing that the crime committed against the boy's family was no accident, Bruce came forward with an offer to become Dick's legal guardian.

▸ The relationship between Bruce and Dick didn't get off to the easiest of starts and one night Dick ran away to try and solve the case of his parents' murder on his own. Bruce went out as Batman and managed to pick the boy up and brought him back to the cave, where he then revealed himself as Batman. Bruce offered Dick the chance to become his partner and train with him but Dick had to play by his rules. Dick accepted and took on the mantle of Robin.

▸ Over the years, Batman and Robin were a formidable duo against the criminals of Gotham but one night Robin was shot by the Joker. Despite all they had been through, Bruce called an end to Dick's career. This put a huge strain on their relationship, which had grown more than that of partners but also father and son. Dick left - he would still return to Gotham as needed but there was a definite tension in the air.

▸ Sometime later, Batman catches a bold kid trying to steal the tires off the Batmobile. Jason Todd was a little punk but Bruce was impressed with his spirit, cleverness, and tenacity. After an attempt to place Jason into child protective services failed, Bruce stepped forward and took Jason in as his ward and later adopted son.

▸ Bruce trained Jason to be the second Robin and it is clear from the very beginning that Jason was a completely different style of Robin to Dick. Jason was a fighter and knew how to handle himself in a brawl but his finesse and detective skills needed work. When Jason was 15, he ran away after hearing that his birth mother was still alive. Bruce was too late in working out that it was a well laid trap for the young man and barely arrived in time to see the building Jason was held captive in explode. Devastated, Bruce took Jason's body back to Gotham and buried him in the Wayne family's plot - vowing to never take on another Robin.

▸ In the wake of Jason's death, Batman became more ruthless. Just teetering on the edge of the "no kill" rule he had established for himself. Several allies the Batman had worked with along the way (including the Justice League, which he had founded along with Superman, Wonder Woman and other heroes) noticed the change in Bruce but seemed to be clueless on how to curb the rage the Dark Knight felt.

▸ Tim Drake had been following Batman's career as long as he could remember and it was the 13 year old that picked up on the problem. Batman needed a Robin. After a failed attempt to get Dick to come back and be Robin, Tim offered himself for the role. Bruce refused - afraid that tragedy would strike again. Eventually though, Tim - with the assistance of Dick and Alfred - stole the Robin suit and managed to save Batman. This action spurred Bruce into considering Tim to be the third Robin.

▸ Out of all the Robins, Bruce trained Tim the hardest, sending him off to exotic places to develop his martial arts skills and partnering him with other Batman allies to push him further. Tim never backed down but he also had a level head and a maturity that was beyond his years that made him a valuable partner. Unlike the other Robins, Tim still had parents when he started in the vigilante life but as was the way with heroes, tragedy has its way of catching up. After Tim's father was killed by Captain Boomerang, Bruce made the offer to adopt him. Laws had changed that he couldn't just make Tim a ward like Dick and Jason had been, so adoption papers were filed and Tim became Bruce's legal son.

▸ Talia al Ghul, daughter of the demon and long time enemy of Batman's, Ra's al Ghul, dropped the 10 year old bombshell of a son in his lap. 10 years before, Batman and Talia had a lustful affair which ended abruptly and with Bruce having no knowledge that a child had been conceived. Damian was an assassin without remorse, a fact his mother took great pride in, and was originally unimpressed with Bruce and didn't understand the "no kill" policy his father had adopted in regards to his enemies.

▸ Things have returned to normal for Bruce and his family for the moment. As normal as they get when you're a family of vigilantes. As always, Bruce has several different cases on the run and as long as crime doesn't sleep, neither will justice.

Positive Traits: Focused, strong moral compass, protective, extremely sharp mind Negative Traits: Closed off, secretive, rarely shares true emotions or feelings

[adreamfromnevermore]

Shadows on the Rooftops

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20196670/chapters/47862427

Chapter 2 - Whispers in the Dark

Gotham, couldn’t be that different from Central. And he was looking for exactly one hero. One that going off his name, dressed as a giant bat. It couldn’t be that hard for the fastest man alive right?

Barry was practically vibrating with excitement. Tugging at the sleeves of the leather jacket he’d decided would help him fit in, he tried to school his face into a scowl. Glaring into the mirror on the wall as Hal laughed behind him. Barry swung around with a huff, glare slipping before returning twofold.

“If you aren’t going to help, then why are you even hear.” Ok so maybe he was really just whining but hey, he’d been tasked with an important job! Intel gathering! He was never tasked with intel gathering. Diana always said he didn’t quite have the mannerism for it. Too chattery.  

“Nah man, I’ll help, I’ll help.” Hal tugged his own jacket off as he stepped forward to lean against the wall. “Just uh, when exactly are you planning to go down there? Cause it’s getting kind of late man.”

“Well, as the newspapers said, the Bats only seen at night!” Swinging back towards the mirror he shuffled through the pile of newspaper clippings he’d printed the night before. “See! If you’re hunting something nocturnal, like our Bat here, you have to go out at night.”

Swinging around once more before Hal could even respond Barry was off. And back again a second later, a baseball cap clutched in one hand. “Do you think the hat’s too much?”

Hal shrugged, smirk pulling into wide grin as he leaned back. “Man, I’ve never been to Gotham. I’ve got no idea what they wear up there.”

“Up there? You’re on like, the opposite coast bro, I don’t think up there cuts it.” As Barry turned towards him, newspaper clippings quickly tucked away into a drawstring back that he slung across his shoulder. Hal laughed again.

“Better start heading down there man. Don’t want to miss anything cause you’re up here right?” And he was off.

Gotham watch out, Flash was on his way!

“Well? Have you finished your homework?” Bruce’s voice echoed through the cave as he slipped up behind them. A chorus of affirmative following it before the lot of them turned towards him.

“So, who’s going out tonight boss man? Spoiler getting to see the light of day? Uh night? Moon light? Whatever.” Stephanie was on her feet, cloak and uniform already on.

“Spoiler will be out tonight. You’ll be running with Red Robin, I need the two of you to look into any rumours about Scarecrow. He may still be locked up in Akham but word on the street agrees that he has something planned.” Turning away from Stephanie as she punched a fist into the air he instead looked towards Damian and Dick. Both already in uniform and clearly waiting for the go ahead to head out.

“Dev says Jason isn’t patrolling for the next 3 days. Remember that, Barbara won’t be out tonight either, so if you have need for backup Kate and Bette will be on standby.” Turning away Bruce slipped through the doors to the locker room as the chatter started up once more.

“Steph, you’re kidding. You spilled coffee on Superman? Superman.”

“What else was I supposed to do? Walk up and ask if he wanted an interview?”

Barry had barely arrived before the sun was well and truly down. The moon rising to take its place in the sky, and Gotham’s criminal underbelly slipping out of the woodwork. Not that they didn’t have a presence in the day time, he just hadn’t been there to witness it. And well that was moving beyond the scope of why he was in Gotham just after the sun had gone down to begin with.  

His subtle questioning of people on the streets had slowly led him further and further into the city. And now, standing under the only working street light on the block Barry couldn’t help his own unease. The gang of what he was pretty sure were thugs that seemed to be wandering the other alley seemed just as nervous.

Eyes searching the sky every time someone so much as whispered, and hands clenched in their pockets. He was thinking guns. Maybe a knife or two, it was hard to tell in Gotham. Back in Central most thugs he dealt with stuck to knives or bats, guns were rare when they expected him to pop up.

Then again, maybe they didn’t expect a hero and were waiting for another gang to fight?

Oh well. That was unimportant, what was important was finding the Bat. Then again, maybe this was his ticket?

He’d been waiting nearly an hour before something changed. The truck that pulled up was empty, and well that was fairly disappointing up until the moment when they started filling it and then Barry was well and truly interested. The odd canisters looked like oxygen but, from the way they were handled he figured they were probably much more dangerous.

And well, he was here to find the Bat yes. But it wouldn’t be an issue if he stepped in? It would only take a moment for him to change and then he could-

The street light above him flickered once, twice, and went out.

The sudden terrified scream put a halt to any and all plans he may have been making. A thin twisted creature seeming to slip free of the shadows at the same time as an odd piercing howl filled the air and a creature dressed in a purple cloak seemed to appear out of thin air atop the truck.

Hooded and cloaked all he could see of it was a void where the face should’ve been. And then it was gone moving amongst the suddenly panicked thugs as the other creature rose, limbs bending and twisting in what might have been a poor imitation at humanity. Before it rose to full height, and he caught a glimpse of what may have once been a boy. Skin pale and pitch black eyes surrounded by blood and dirt that streaked across its face.  

Maybe he had missed something.

As its mouth opened, revealing what looked like sharp teeth, an odd inhuman chirp echoed through the air. And the howl returned, the purple cloaked figure pinning a man to the ground in seconds and rising slowly a moment later.

The void where its face should have been twisting and changing as a face seemed to form across it. Male and pale with terror. Barry felt his breath catch in his throat as he froze staring in his own sudden burst of terror at the face of the thug the creature had pinned to the ground, and then the mouth began to open. Almost grotesque in the way it seemed to shift and show the void beneath.

Twisted english echoing through the alley as it turned towards the thugs still standing. “Who?” And cut off with another vicious howl as part of the face almost seemed to tear and twist and then the cloaked figure was gone. And the one in red and black was all that was left.

Moving towards the thugs it seemed almost to twist in and out of reality, and then it was on them. And in seconds the thugs were down. All of them save one on the ground unconscious and injured as it turned towards the last.

“I uh, I don’t know what that meant man?” Stumbling back the thug almost seemed to weigh his own loyalty, or his life, before meeting the creatures eyes. “Crane, boss said he thought the job mighta been for Crane but I don’t know! It was done through a middle man!” And as he spoke the creature froze, head cocked to the side like a bird.

And then its head jerked forward in what Barry thought might have been an imitation of a nod, and it was gone. Seemingly slipping into the shadows it had come from as the man screamed and was pulled upwards by his feet. Wire coiled around his ankles as he hung, suspended in mid air.

Barry had barely calmed his racing heart when a hand grasped the back of his jacket and he was spun around and slammed to the ground. A purple cloak swaying above him as his eyes locked onto a twisting void where a face should of been. And he blinked, screwing his eyes shut as an odd chirping sound came from his left and the figure above him shifted. Shaking him lightly as he forced himself to look once more at the creature above him and bit back a yelp as his own face stared down at him.

“Leave.” The voice was twisted and broken, his face seeming to break even as the words were uttered and the void once more filled the space where the face should have been.

“Unwelcome. Unwanted.” And that was the other one. A pair of inky black eyes in the darkness as it crept forward, drawing back before it had reached the light. Voice odd and twisted, almost too young for the face that watched him.

Clark had been right. There was no way these things were human, and no matter what Diana said they were beyond terrifying.

He blinked and they were gone, leaving him flat on his back just in time to hear the sound of sirens drawing closer and stumble to his feet. Glancing over as he stepped back and into the shadows behind him, he was almost surprised to see the first man the purple one had taken down beginning to shift only to slump back to the ground as the first cop cars arrived.

Stumbling back and further into the alley Barry forced himself to breath and turned. Taking off a second later without a destination in mind.

Well, there was technically a destination. He was getting the fuck out of Gotham, and then maybe he’d take a breath and pause and think through whatever had just happened.

There had been two of them, and if he was honest with himself he didn’t think either of them matched what they knew of the Bat. Which meant there were three in Gotham. Three, how the hell had they missed three new vigilantes popping up?

Sliding too a stop Barry let himself fall heavily against the side of a building as he surveyed his surroundings. Metropolis, made sense. Maybe he could snag Supes and they could talk about whatever twilight zone Gotham was.

And he’d thought Supes ghost girl had been wild. The purple one had stolen his face, what was even the purpose of that? Aside from the scare factor?

Sliding to a stop two rooftops away Steph let herself lean into TIm’s side. “You are terrifying and I will never get used to whatever contortionist crap Nightwing’s been teaching you.” As the other stilled beside her and turned, face mostly obscured by the mask of grime he’d applied.

“Like you’re one to talk, your mask copies faces well enough that they can be recognized now. Its fucking terrifying Spoiler.” Grinning back she leaned away for a moment to watch the streak disappear. And then almost laughed as she remembered he couldn’t see her face. “I’m laughing at you behind the mask you know.”

“Bat, the Flash is gone. Spoiler and I warned him away.” And Tim was back on track and completely focused on their task.

“We’ve tracked Crane’s supplier down, but the goons moving it didn’t even know for certain whether they were working for Crane or not they only guessed.”

“Yes. We’ll head back to the cave, we’ve run out of leads for the night. And I want to un-encrypt the chip I picked up at the first location.”

Leaning against the wall Stephanie was silent as she listened to the chatter over the comms and watched the cops swarm over the newest location they’d tipped them off too. As the comms fell silent once more Tim joined her in watching.

“Ready?” His voice was barely a hiss as he stepped up onto the small ledge.

Laughing Steph stepped passed him, and let herself fall. Already activating the grapple to swing herself back up as she heard him leap off behind her.

Barry didn’t have to wander long before he caught sight of Superman. Hanging high above him, almost as if waiting for a crime to occur.

“Supes! Down here!” And maybe shouting hadn’t been necessary but Barry was pretty sure he was still shaking from earlier. As the other swung around and then easily dropped down to join him, raising an eyebrow as he got closer.

“I thought you would be in Gotham for the night?” Barry was shaking his head before Clark had even made it halfway through the sentence.

“No, uh uh. You thought your bloody ghost girl was bad? Try a face stealing void creature!” For a moment Clark stared down at him, seemingly lost for words before dropping the last few feet to the ground.

“Did you say face stealing void creature? Is that what the Bat is?” And once more Barry was shaking his head.

“Oh no, no, no, that isn’t even the half of it.there was this, this, well, it was, I don;t even know! It was kinda like a bird I guess? Kept chirping like one, and well I don’t think english was really either of their suits.” Ringing his hands he couldn’t help but glance upwards as if expecting one of the two to appear once more. “It almost looked like it had blood all over its face, and its eyes were pitch black! All the way, no white’s at all. Everything else it wore was black and red, and you know now that I’m thinking about it. I think it had some kind of cloak er, maybe wings or something?”

He wasn’t surprised when Clark watched him silently for a moment before nodding slowly. “There were two? We haven’t heard anything about a second hero. We’d barely heard about a first.” Shaking his head with a frustrated sight Clark turned away for a moment.

“We’ve been looking into this Bat for barely a week, and it’s already thrown how many curveballs at us? Barry, I’ll call another meeting for tomorrow.” Lifting off the ground once more Clark paused before letting out a soft curse as he swept one hand up and through his air. “Who ever can make it, and then we can discuss what our next step should be.”

Nodding Barry took a few steps back and shrugged. “Sure, sure Supes. See ya then I guess.” And Superman was gone leaving Barry alone in the alley.

“Welp.” Turning around Barry shook himself out, and took off sliding to a stop just inside the small forensic lab of his precinct. He had time to take care of a few things, might as well get it done if he wasn’t spending the night in Gotham.

And besides after that? He sure as hell wasn’t sleeping.

Diana had only just returned to her apartment, nearly one in the morning when the alert was sent out. A meeting scheduled for the next day, though not a pressing one.

And that was enough to tell her just what it was about. Her phone was by her ear before she’d finished reading the message on her comm. And unsurprisingly, her call was answered after precisely 3 rings.

“Diana.”

“Bruce.”

“Is something-”

“What did your kids do to Flash and how traumatized is he going to be tomorrow?”

And well, that wasn’t quite how she’d meant to word it. But the startled laugh she recieved was worth it.

If only for the fact that she’d startled a laugh out of the original Bat himself.

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

To Roast or Not to Roast

It’s been a hot sec since I wrote a DC fic but I got an idea about the batkids being asked to participate in a schwanky roast of Bruce and it turned into this! Some light internal angst with a happy ending.  Gen Rating: PG Words: 1856 AO3

Dick frowned down at the invitation. The thick envelope made of paper that cost more than most kids in Gotham paid for their notebooks had fallen out of the pile of bills and magazines and postcards when he’d grabbed his mail. It was heavier than anything else in the stack with the cardstock it contained and slipped right out when he’d grabbed everything. He had carried it as though it were likely to explode at any moment or contained deadly poison or was a carrier of smallpox and living in Blüdhaven and having a return address of Gotham those weren’t wholly out of the realm of possibility.

When he’d finally reached his kitchen Dick dumped the rest on the counter and just held the cream envelope in his hands, studying it with narrowed eyed suspicion that only increased as he read and reread “Gotham City Chamber of Commerce” in the upper left corner.

Finally, Dick opened a drawer, pulling a steak knife from within it and tore through the top of the paper. He slipped the invitation out and carefully read the script.

You are cordially invited to a night honoring Gotham’s great businessman and philanthropist Bruce Wayne

The night will feature a four-course meal and conclude with a roast of our guest of honor.

Please RSVP with the card enclosed.

Dick felt his eyebrows raise as he read the invitation again. A roast. Bruce was getting a roast. Bruce agreed to a roast. Bruce agreed to a roast after Alfred pressuring him into it and making the Chamber of Commerce agree to donate a rather large sum of money was more likely. And running his own investigation to make sure he wouldn’t wind up literally on a spit Dick was sure.

He chuckled and shifted the cards to find the RSVP and hope they hadn’t skimped on return postage when he noticed something odd. There was another piece of paper, nicer still than anything he had in his printer but not the same thick cardstock of the invitation. He unfolded it curiously and frowned as he read.

Dear Mr. Grayson,

We hope that you are well and hope to see you in attendance. We are writing to ask if you might consider being one of our special guest speakers for the night. As Mr. Wayne’s eldest son we thought that you might bring a unique and entertaining perspective to the stage. We have also reached out to Mr. Drake-Wayne and Miss Cain-Wayne and greatly hope the three of you would consider speaking.

We await your reply on the matter.

The Gotham City Chamber of Commerce Lucy Plumber Events Chair

As he finished reading Dick let the paper fall onto the counter. He went to collapse on his couch, fishing his phone out of his pocket. They wanted him to speak at Bruce’s roast. They wanted him to roast Bruce. Not that he couldn’t, he did all the time it was quiet easy after all these years and well brooding in a dark cave while dressed as a bat kind of made you an easy target. The question was did he want to roast Bruce in front of these people?

It was one thing to tease Bruce and make fun of him when they were in their masks because that wasn’t Bruce, that was Batman. Batman deserved it more often than not and had bigger things to worry about than Nightwing making fun of him in front of a gang of would be arsonists. Batman was used to having his protegee complain about him with various members of the Justice League and Titans, most of them had just about as much right to complain.

It was another thing to tease Bruce to his friends and family. They got it. They either grew up with the guy too or had been sidekicks themselves. There was a something that came from growing up in the shadow of heroes and really only people who had done that understood it. So yeah, him and Babs or Tim or Cass ragging on Bruce in the cave was allowed. They’d earned that right. Bitching about him with Wally or Roy or even Jason and Steph – when they were on speaking terms – was allowed too.

Standing up in front of a room full of Gotham’s elite and making fun of the man that, to them, saved Dick? Yeah, no. Ok, yeah he did save Dick that was true but he didn’t need a bunch of rich snobs thinking he was some ungrateful circus brat, he’d dealt with enough of that those first couple years after high school thanks. Besides, they didn’t deserve to hear Dick’s jokes. Not the ones about Bruce. They wouldn’t understand. He didn’t want them to understand. Those were personal.

Besides, what was he going to say? “You know how you grow up and people tell you you’re ‘one of a kind!’ and all? Yeah, Bruce never said that and for proof please let me point to the three others who are apparently just like me and even with changes to the costume some still think we’re a singular person!” Or, “People always tell me ‘you’re so well adjusted!’ and yeah I am for a kid who watched their parents die. For a kid who was raised and trained to fight crime by a man in a Kevlar furry suit? Well the verdict’s still out.”

Dick could just say no, he wouldn’t do it. Hell, Dick should just say no. It just… He didn’t know. It bothered him. Everything about being asked bothered him.

He kept playing with his phone, spinning it around in his hand, as he thought when he finally remembered why he’d gotten it out in the first place. He checked the time as he unlocked it and yup, Tim should definitely be awake by now. He hit the call button, lifted it to his ear, and waited.

“Nnngh. Whu?” Tim’s voice was muffled when he picked up and maybe Dick underestimated how late the kid could sleep in on a weekend.

“Good afternoon Timbers,” he couldn’t keep the tease out of his voice, not that Dick tried.

“’M on the west coast. ‘S still mornin’,” he protested. Dick winced a bit, he hadn’t realized it was a Titans weekend so yeah maybe Tim got some slack.

“Sorry.”

“’S fine. What’s up?”

“Well I was going to ask you about something interesting I got in the mail-”

“If Steph sent you a live bat it you should blame Jason,” Tim interrupted quickly and Dick paused.

“Um. No. What?”

The younger boy sighed and Dick could just see him scrubbing his hand down his face before pushing it back up to push his long hair back. It was a movement he did often and one that often prompted a remark about haircuts from Alfred. “I dunno. Harper got her and Cass really into Les Mis and then she and Jason ran into each other on patrol the other night and he caught her belting out One Day More or something? I really don’t know. She was talking really fast, you know how Steph gets. Anyways, they started talking and Jason told her something about how Victor Hugo sent his fiancée a live bat in the mail and she thought it was hilarious and well we all remember what happened when she found those websites were you could send people glitter and gummy dicks and poop.”

Dick had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. He did remember that, vividly. Tim and Cass both had a fine coating of glitter over their apartments for weeks after that, though with all the pranks and Cass being Cass there was normally glitter coating their apartments. Dick had gotten the gummy dicks sent to him and work and truth be told they’d been pretty good. Bruce had received the elephant poop. At the office. And Tim had seen and told Kon who’d told Clark and then there was an article in The Daily Planet and Bruce had been forced to give an interview to a very amused Viki Vale about the whole thing when she made a very compelling argument about the failings of a Gotham paper not being able to report on Gotham news and the importance of the press and well there’s a reason she and Lois go toe-to-toe on scoops.

“There was no live animals, though that would have been preferable,” Dick admitted once he was sure he wouldn’t burst out laughing if he opened his mouth.

“What did you get then? A dead bat?”

Dick snorted. “No. At least not today. I got an invitation to a roast for Bruce. And to roast Bruce.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Apparently, you did too.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t know how I feel about that.”

“Neither do I,” Dick admitted. “I don’t know what I’d say. I don’t know what I’d want to say.”

“You could say no,” Tim said levelly. “I haven’t even seen it yet but I’m probably going to. Too bad they can’t ask Jason since he’s legally dead and all, he’d love this. Or Barbara. Let her roast him, she’s good at that.”

Dick smiled and shook his head, imagining those two tag-teaming. It wasn’t hard, they did it on the comms some nights and it was some of the most vicious and scathing remarks he’d ever heard. Thankfully, it was rare they were levelled at him. There had been times though and those had been rough.

“I don’t think any of what they’d say is fit for the general public,” he said dryly.

Tim gave a noncommittal hum. “Steph and Harper. They’d just rip into him for being a rich white guy.”

Dick sat up straight. “That’s not a bad idea Tim.”

“What? Have Harper and Steph do it? Um, I still haven’t seen this thing but I’m fairly certain they asked us cause we’re his kids but not like an actual child like Damian.”

“No, I know exactly who it should be. Thanks. Have fun with your friends this weekend, I’ll come to the Manor for dinner sometime this week.”

“Um ok? Bye?”

“Bye!” Dick hung up with a smile.

He pushed himself up over the back of the couch and grabbed the letter off the counter. There was an office number under the signature and while there was a chance she wasn’t in today Dick figured that being Events Chair meant you worked weekends. Besides, it’s not like he couldn’t just leave a message.

She picked up on the second ring and Dick’s smile grew. “Hi Lucy,” he pushed as much charm as he could muster into his voice, “this is Dick Grayson. I just got your invitation to Bruce’s roast and while I’m honored that you invited me to speak I just don’t think I’m the right person for the job. However, I do think I could put you in contact with someone who is. Have you reached out to Bruce’s cousin? Kate Kane? She’s a delight and if her barbs at holidays are anything to go by I think she would be perfect.”

[wearetakingthehobbitstogallifrey]

14, 17, 20, 21,23, 26, for the salty asks? Thank you!

Hi!!!  Sorry it took me so long to answer this!  As you requested, this is about the DC fandom (and because I am me I am pretty much gonna focus on the Batfam) :)

14.  Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

I don’t know if this is really unpopular or not but I firmly believe in the power of cherry-picking from comics…I am the type of person to scream both NO LISTEN THIS IS CANON and also CANON CAN DROWN IN GOTHAM HARBOR 

17.  Instead of XYZ happening, I would have made ABC happen…

*drags fingernails down my cheeks* instead of the Batcat wedding falling apart :( Bruce and Selina would have gotten married, left their honeymoon after like two or three days because they missed their kids there wasn’t any crime to fight and the blue of the ocean was only spectacular the first thirty-six hoursand then we could have had it all, Bruce and Selina learning to live and love as a married couple, with all the difficulties and joys that entails, and all the Batfam having to adjust in their own ways, what would that mean for the rest of DC, villains and heroes alike, and will Bruce and Selina have any kids together and how does that effect Damian everyone and DANG IT WE COULD HAVE HAD SOMETHING REVOLUTIONARY, THIS COULD HAVE BECOME ICONIC IT COULD HAVE CHANGED EVERYTHING BUT NOooOoOoOooOOOO BRUCE HAS TO BE UNHAPPY TO BE A GOOD BATMAN AND IF HE MARRIES SELINA HE WILL BE TOO THRILLED WITH LIFE AND THERE GOES GOTHAM AND THE UNIVERSE AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN BEING BATMAN MAKES HIM HAPPY OR THAT HIS GANG OF CHILDREN MAKE HIM HAPPY OR THAT FRIENDS LIKE CLARK MAKE HIM HAPPY SHUT UP YOU’RE SPOILING EVERYTHING *ROLLS EYES*

20.  What is the purest ship in the fandom?

Tim Drake x A Good Night’s RestTim Drake x Knowing He Is Important and LovedJason Todd x Eating All of Alfred’s Good CookingJason Todd x Healing His Relationship with Bruce and Calling Him “Dad” or “Pops” Dick Grayson x Bruce Hugging Him and Carding His Hands Through His Hair @camsthisky Dick Grayson x Quality Time with His Family and FriendsDick Grayson x Reuniting with ZitkaDick Grayson x me

Damian Wayne x A Room Full of KittensDamian Wayne x Befriending a Cow and Whatever Goliath IsDamian Wayne x Peacefully Drawing in the Sunlight While Dick Melts with Love for His Little Bro @preciousthingsareprecious

Barbara Gordon x Being Valued for Herself and Not Just for What She Can Do

Stephanie Brown x Getting Some Damn RespectStephanie Brown x All the Waffles She Wants

Cassandra Cain x Bruce Treating Her Like His PrincessCassandra Cain x Receiving Everything Good and BeautifulCassandra Cain x Being the Coolest/Wisest/Most Empathetic Sister Ever

Duke Thomas x Being the Only Sane Member of the Batfam

Bruce Wayne x Being a Good BatdadBruce Wayne x Being Compassionate and Kind to KidsBruce Wayne x Adopting Every Lonely/Lost/Orphaned Kid He Meets

Alfred Pennyworth x Getting Some Peace and Quiet for a Change

21.  What are your thoughts on crack ships?

Not really my cup of tea

23.  Unpopular character you love?

Well I have seen that there are a fair amount of people who seem to think that they can’t love certain members of the Batfam unless they dislike or even hate on other members.  Like people who hate Tim and love Damian or vice versa, or people who think Jason is a saint and Bruce is the worst or vice versa.  I’m not here for any of that.  I love all my sons and daughters and though they all make mistakes, though they hurt each other from time to time, they are all very precious to me and I can understand why they say and do the things they do.  I just want them all to be happy and at peace with one another and to have each other’s backs no matter what

26.  Most shippable character?

I think Bruce and Dick are probably the most shippable, and the comics seem to think the same, which is fun and understandable considering their good looks and strong personalities and general moral character, but also kinda sucks because there are sooo many love interests and ship wars happen and then also certain comic writers that will not be named here refuse to let Batcat be happily married think they have to keep to the status quo 

also i know comics are many and writers are many and canon is varied but CERTAIN writers seem to think Dick can’t be happy or content in a long-term relationship because obviously he must sleep around they need to go read that tumblr post with comics citations about how Dick–whatever his faults–really does take relationships seriously and is not a one-night stand kind of guy sorry this was a tangent but I had to say it

[camsthisky]

Hi! Bat Fam fic rec? Love your blog! Have a pleasant day!

Of course! I did just make another fic rec post, which you can find here, but all of the ones listed here are specifically Batfam. I didn’t include any that I’ve already recommended in my other post, but I thought this would be a good idea to include the ones that didn’t make the cut last time (mostly because I was dead tired and posting at two in the morning).

You can also look at my fic recs tag!

Again, just a fair warning, a lot of these are going to be Dick Grayson centric.

Keep Losing Sleep by incogneat_ohWords: 2,893Summary: “When’d you last sleep?” Jay asks, curious.“Eleven years ago,” Tim says, at the same time as Dick says, “Tuesday.”My Comments: The batboys trying to help Tim with his insomnia? Heck yes.

Come One, Come All by incogneat_ohWords: 2,047Summary: He sits on the end of the bed, watching the slow expansion of Dick’s chest, frowning slightly. Tapping his fingers on the knees of his jeans absently.Or, the fic where Dick is injured and the family are sticking close by.My Comments: I’m a sucker for Dick getting hurt and his family doing their best to take care of him. This is one of THE best I’ve read. I seriously read it all of the time.

Kill your darlings by ShariArunaWords: 2,476Summary: Fic Prompt!: Brainwashed evil Dick with Batbros to the rescue!My Comments: Man, this fic hits hard. The boys have to fight their brother after he’s dosed with fear toxin and I just feel for them so much.

Manus by ShariArunaWords: 2,002Summary: He knows his family, he knows which people are important to them. And Dick’s been at war with Bruce for the first place in every Robins’ heart for a long time now. Winning, for the most part.My Comments: Okay, so the thing I love about this fic is that it shows that Jason cares for his family without ever really stating the fact. Dick’s injured and Jason feels like it’s all his fault. My heart breaks just reading this fic! Also, check out @unavenged-robin​ for more because they’re amazing!

The Name Game by RascalJoy (DarkQuill)Words: 1,610Summary: Duke Thomas doesn’t have a hero name yet. The Robins (read as: Jason) decide to fix that.(“If you say ‘Robin,’ I will cut you,” Damian growled.“He will,” Tim agreed. “He’s crazy.”)My Comments: This is kind of crack-ish, but I think it’s pretty funny, and it’s such an accurate representation of how done Duke is with the batkids.

Mistlefoe by strikeyourcolorsWords: 10,158Summary: With forced house arrest, a poisoning, a charity holiday lights display, last minute shopping, accidental lipstick drugging, and mistletoe based violence, chaos reigns supreme in the days leading up to Christmas. But the Batfamily? They thrive in chaos. In other words, pointless holiday humor and fluff with some feelings mixed in.My Comments: Okay, so I can hear you asking, “Why are you recommending a Christmas fic?” and my answer is because this fic messed me up. Badly. I thought I was in for a funny, light-hearted fic, but it gets kind of angsty towards the end (like a good kind of angsty that hits you right in the feels).

April 27th by mitch23kWords: 2,694Summary: Just five days before the fifth anniversary of Jason Todd’s death, Dick Grayson gives a risky answer to an interviewer question about his brother. Jason thinks it’s funny, and suddenly, the family finds themselves in a competition to see who can be more dramatic about their brother on TV.My Comments: I love reading how Jason slowly comes to realize that he’s a part of the family and this fic does it really well! It’s a good read!

The League of Extraordinary Bowling Bats by chibi_nightowlWords: 5,065Summary: “What did Dickiebird do? Steal all your other shirts?”The shirt is bright green with wide yellow stripes pretending to be a pin stripe running vertically across it. On the back, in bright red letters, “Timmy” is spelled out.“You’re next,” he spits out, shooting Jason the worst glare he could muster. “He’s got one for you too.”My Comments: A fluffy fic of the family doing ridiculous things like renting out an entire bowling alley. Amazing.

Bruce texts instead of talking, and Dick learns to deal with his home situation by narfiffiftic (maladictive)Words: 1,100Summary: Dr. Hurt shot Dick, and now he has to deal with the aftermath: Make sure you check the stitches before you go to sleep, I saw you for ten minutes today, you realize what nearly happened? Just do as I say, B, they’re on the back of my head, you come check on them. Use a mirror, Dick. Be careful,My Comments: Set between Batman and Robin #16 and #17, where DIck has brain surgery. It really makes you think of how Bruce really hasn’t changed a bit. I feel for poor Dick here, but he’s always got his brothers!

Meet the Family by autumnangelwritesWords: 1,610Summary:It was rare that Bruce got called to handle ‘dad issues’ and, well, Clark honestly couldn’t resist.My Comments: Bruce is so done with the Justice League in this and it’s pretty funny. It is angsty, though, and it makes you think that maybe Bruce actually does know how to parent.

Talon’s Grasp by lowflyingfruitWords: 78,187 (23/23)Summary: Dick Grayson was kidnapped by the Court of Owls. Talon escaped. With no known way to undo what has been done, and the Court trying to reclaim their assassin, is there still a place for Nightwing in Gotham? Is there still a place for Dick in the family?My Comments: I don’t usually read Talon!AUs, but this is a really cool fic and I got sucked into it. It shows how the whole family would react to Dick getting captured and they try to scramble to turn him back, and it’s honestly really good.

So those are all on ao3, but here are a few on ff.net:

Altruism by paganpunk2Words: 4,800 (2/2)Summary: Dick’s day volunteering at a BPD fundraising car wash takes a turn for the delightful when Alfred stops by. T for language.My Comments: A fluffy one-shot where Alfred just wants to support Dick, even if Bruce won’t. This is one of my favs, but of course, all of paganpunk’s stuff (especially the Spark in the Dark series) is absolutely amazing!

Bumper Stickers by FinalArcWords: 3,080Summary: Bruce is back from the “dead”, and not especially tolerant of some of the changes made in his absence. Dick couldn’t care less.My Comments: Someone on ff.net was asking me for a prompt and they rec’ed this to me. And honestly? It’s really good. Bruce has to come to terms that life basically moved on without him, and it’s kind of hard to swallow for him. A really good read.

A Robin’s Gotta Eat by RomanianDollarWords: 3,631Summary:When Jason gets injured in a gang fight he heads to the one person who will receive him: Tim Drake. While there he finds his kid brother doesn’t have the best diet habits, and decides to take matters in his own hands.My Comments: Jason cooks and the family eats together! It’s pretty fluffy, and Tim’s reactions in this are pure gold.

Hope you enjoy reading!

[dxathstrxke-archives]

your honest opinion on the batkids?

“Shit, the batkids? Alright. You’re gonna want to sit down for this one.”

DICK GRAYSON -  DICKY and I go way back. We’ve got a lot of history together. We had some good times, fighting him and the Titans, and some bad. My son JERICHO, Joseph, even joined the Titans, but like I said. There was the good and the bad, and THAT was the bad. But Dicky disappointed me down the line. I have to say he was kickin’ ass and takin’ names as the leader, he had a good fight in him back then, what happened Dicky boy? You run off and become NIGHTWING, you’ve grown soft on me. You know … he used to be my favorite. Oh well, they’re nothing like fighting the Batman, am I right? @ncghtwing

JASON TODD - JASON … shit, that kiddo’s a ghost. I know a lot about a whole lotta people, but Jason I don’t know anything about. Well, I know a couple of things. For one, somehow he keeps running into the Batman and the rest of the batkids. I’ve seen it, and I can tell ya, he’s one of them. He goes by RED HOOD. He’s not like the rest of his brothers and sisters. There’s something about Jason, that I can’t shake. I feel like there’s some pain there. Something made him angry … and I understand that. Believe me, I do. Because when someone’s that cold, it ain’t for no reason. I’d love to adopt him! Shit, I don’t think he’s such a bad kid. And I don’t think Jason and I are all that different. @jvsntodds

TIM DRAKE - TIM drake. The RED ROBIN himself. Listen, when I called him a smartass, I meant it! Think of it as a term of endearment. A compliment, drake should be thanking me. I guess he was one of Batman’s robins, I don’t know they all start to look alike, but the kid’s good. A little birdy told me, he’s pretty smart. Probably the best of the robins but, sue me … Dicky was too good to pass up. I’m all for a kid who’s smart and can stand his ground in a fight. Moves and counter moves, Drake could use that head of his to do anything. But why did he have to hold hands with Batgirl? No, hold on, Spoiler. Kid was stupid to give himself down to her. @tiimdrckes

DAMIAN (AL GHUL) WAYNE - Well, fuck me sideways, it’s the little asswipe, DAMIAN. You can’t hide from your al Ghul name, you little brat. You should remember who you’re the spawn of. A product of the League of Assassins, Ra’s thought to put this little shit in charge of the League instead of me?! The kid can’t even wipe his own ass without someone knowing about it. I’m just jealous. Good thing Wayne decided to take your tiny ass in. You might think you’re 3 ounces of whoop ass, but remember, I know your mother. And I can’t wait for the day you piss somebody off enough to write a contract on your head, or any other al Ghul. Then it’s time to do my job. @birdbladed

BARBARA GORDON - BARBARA GORDON. BARBARA GORDON … isn’t she the Commissioner’s daughter? James Gordon? Well, I know she’s BATGIRL and like Tim, she’s a nerd. All us nerds got to stick together, right? Since the super soldier experiment made me hella smarter, too. How Tim’s been called the best Robin? I’d say she was the best Batgirl. At least she didn’t start a war like Spoiler - how stupid can that girl get? I’d say good luck to Gordon. I’m not the hero type, but, for her peace of mind, she better hope nothing bad happens to her. @fkabatgirl

STEPHANIE BROWN - STEPHANIE. Here comes the dim-witted one. The useless one. The one Batman should’ve given up on because she’s a waste of time. She shouldn’t be allowed to breathe the same air. Who is this girl? Why is she still here? Other than being Tim’s little chick on the side, who cares? She eventually became SPOILER, we’re just going to forget her little stunt as her time as Batgirl. Shit, Barbara should be ashamed. She started a fucking GANG WAR in Gotham. Why? I don’t know … but it was probably a dumb reason, because the girl’s the worst! Does this chick even go here?  @sp0ileralcrt

CASSANDRA CAIN - CASSANDRA – oh I like her. Like Damian, but much better, this girl was raised in violence. It took a long time, a couple of killings, and a lot of people to talk to, but I found out a little bit of information on her. Found out she’s the kid of Lady Shiva and that bitch, Shiva, she don’t play. Even if Shiva’s worked with Ra’s, I’ve gotta respect the woman. Her kid, not so much, but I’m a fan. Cain is BLACK BAT. And I have to say, the girl is a machine. Let’s just say it’d be better for her to work with me, not against me. @orphvncd

[comickergirl]

Hi Comicker! I was wondering if you could tell me what's going on in the DC comics world? I'm a fan (more of the TV show/film end of the fandom tbh), but I do try to keep up some with the comics and... Convergence lost me. Lost me hard. And I have no idea who Johnathan Samuel Kent is and I- yeah. Yeah. So...help? Please? Who and what is happening? P.S. I thought I saw you answer this for someone recently but I couldn't find it, so I apologize if this is one of those "FAQ" things for you ^^"

Hello! :D

Oh, no, I actually don’t get a ton of comics questions. (Like. Current continuity stuff. I’ve done a handful of recs but otherwise, I think this is the first I’ve been asked about what’s going on with DC right now!)

Okay, this is going to...probably be long, and there will be SPOILERS for stuff, so I’ll hide it under a ‘read more.’

Update: Yeah. It’s long. And I spoil like. A good chunk of the DC universe titles out RN.

Right, so. Convergence.

Don’t know how far you got into Convergence, BUT, basically: Brainiac does what Brainiac does best. He steals a bunch of cities, bottles ‘em up, and screws with ‘em. (Oh, there’s also like, this Telos guy or whatever but...yeah. IDK.)

The cities were basically pulled from the DC multiverse so there was Moscow from Earth-30 and Metropolis from Earth-2, that sort of thing. And while the cities were bottled up, or whatever, the superheroes were without powers. (I’m gonna recommend checking out Jeff Parker’s and Doc Shaner’s Shazam Convergence title, just because I can.) 

Also the cities had to fight? For some reason? Because comics?

Anyways, that ‘without powers thing’ is kind of important, BECAUSE!

On one of those worlds/cities/what-have-you was a pre-Flashpoint Clark and Lois.

And Clark, being a bit more human due to that no powers thing, was able to have a kid with Lois.

THUS. JON KENT WAS BORN.

And then once Convergence was over (stuff went down, IDK what exactly, I too was frustrated with this whole thing and stopped reading) pre-Flashpoint Lois and Clark basically got to pick a universe to go to (because their home went ka-plooey I guess) and they picked Earth-0.

AKA, The New 52.

And I’m sure there were other things goin’ on but let’s just skip ahead to what really matters and that is:

Totally-not-a-reboot-guys REBIRTH

So, Rebirth kicks off with this big ol’ oneshot thing that kinda boils down to (white) Wally West returning to the New 52 Universe and kinda making everybody go, ‘whoa, hey, did we like, experience a line-wide-reboot that erased a bunch of continuity to get that sweet, sweet new-reader $$$?’

...Alright so they didn’t say that exactly but basically Wally showing up is screwing with everybody’s perception of the known universe, or whatever. He brings HOPE and LIGHT to the grim, joyless New 52 world.

(Grim and joyless here referring to the actual DC editorial mandate that the heroes cannot be happy. I’m not trying to be snarky, that was...that was a thing.)

So NOW we get to the part where I tell you that I am not reading every single Rebirth title, because who has the time, really. So I can only catch you up on a handful of characters, but hopefully that will be...sort of helpful:

THE SUPERFAM:

New 52 Clark finally died. (This was a storyline that started before Rebirth.) And when he did, Lois and Lana (the new 52 versions) were caught in the weird explosion and seemed to absorb some crazy energy coming off of Dead!Clark.

Spoiler: They did, in fact, absorb that crazy energy.

So that’s how we get to SUPERWOMAN, which everyone thought would be a Lois book but it turned out to be a Lana book and I don’t wanna really get into the crazy plot stuff, so all you need to know is this: Nu52 Lois is dead, Lana has superpowers, but they’re killing her. Also, she’s dating Steel. And Lena Luthor went off the deep end in a HUGE WAY. Like. Bald, disembodied head being kept in the basement of Lexcorp way.

Over in Action Comics, Lex is running around wearing the ‘S’ shield because of course Lex would decide to become Superman once Superman died. Also running around in Action Comics is our good friend Pre-Flashpoint Clark, who fights Doomsday for a hot second?

(Confused yet?)

And ALSO ALSO running around in Action Comics is a THIRD Clark Kent! A seemingly a totally human Clark Kent! For a long time, he was an enigma, wrapped in a mystery, or however that quote goes...

Well, now we know that this third Clark is Mr. Mxysptly...Myx...the little imp guy in the purple hat.

There was like this whole...thing. Where he was captured and he thought Clark would save him but he DIDN’T so to escape, Mxy had to basically mind-wipe himself and make himself believe he was really Clark Kent (and this kinda helped a little bit with that secret identity snafu the nu52 Clark had going on...) but now he remembers that he’s NOT Clark Kent and that Clark Kent didn’t save him so basically he’s OUT FOR REVEEEEEENGE.

But IN THE MEANTIME, Superman (the comic, not the guy) is focusing on this pre-Flashpoint Clark/Lois/Jon family. These guys don’t go by ‘the Kents’ BTW. Because when Clark and Lois and Jon arrived in this universe, there was ALREADY a Clark Kent so. They are the SMITHS.

Also, Krypto is alive and well. Thank goodness. 

Jon sometimes hangs out with Damian Wayne in Supersons. When Damian isn’t leading the Teen Titans, that is.

Supergirl is blessedly free of all of these intersecting story lines. She’s off on her own, fighting her robot dad. And also rehabilitating Kryptonian Werewolves. NBD.

THE BATFAM

I am. Sooooo behind on most of the Batbooks, ngl. All I know is that Detective Comics is leaning in to the actual ‘Fam’ part of ‘Batfam.’ The gang’s all here: Dick, Tim*, Harper, Cass, Steph**, Kate, Clayface for some reason, Duke...and oh, right, Bruce.

*Tim is presumed dead but ACTUALLY, he’s been abducted by the ominous figure pulling all of the strings surrounding Rebirth and he’s probably a Watchman dude? The guy pulling the strings I mean. This all appears to be leading up to merging the Watchmen universe w/ the DC universe.

**Steph is having a hard time right now, my poor child. She’s frustrated with Bruce (but then, who isn’t) and honestly she just needs a hug, okay?

So then we have Batgirl. Babs spent some time in Asia, but now she’s back in Burnside fighting gentrification dating the Penguin’s son getting a degree in library science.

You know. When she’s not paling around with Black Canary and Huntress in Batgirl and the Birds of Prey.

WONDER WOMAN

...I only started reading the new arc for Bilquis Evely’s art. I know, I know, I am a horrible person.

GREEN LANTERNS

Jessica’s anxious and Baz needs to calm down a little but otherwise they are doing an okay job at fighting off intergalactic threats. Also something about cooking?  

THE FLASH

IDK man I’m bitter about what went down with Meena. 

(Ugh, okay, now I have to talk about it: So, apparently, Barry was not dating Iris. He was BRIEFLY dating this woman named Meena. And how he met Meena? Well, some bad guys messing with the Speed Force manage to grant random citizens w/ speed powers. So there was a bunch of speedsters and Meena, a doctor at Star Labs, was one of them. She became Fast Track, and helped Flash, but ultimately bit the dust because we can’t have nice things. 

And neither can Barry, apparently. You know.

Because DEATH.

Because COMICS.

...Also Barry’s partner got powers and became the supervillain Godspeed.)

EARTH TWO SOCIETY

JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA

Bruce is putting together a team of superheroes because people are afraid of the Justice League proper...because they’re viewed as ‘Gods’ or whatever? 

(But I mean. Bruce gets a woman who can magically take on the attributes of animals, a giant space bounty hunter, a woman who steals heat/energy from people by touching them, a guy who can shrink, a guy who glows, and Black Canary so. I mean. They’re kinda scary too?)

...

Okay, I think...I think that’s it. Those are the titles I’m either caught up on, or that I at least started/tried out. There are a few books that I’m waiting on the trades, so I have NO CLUE what is happening w/ them right now. (New Super-Man, all of the Bat books, Green Arrow. Trinity.) 

I hope this kind of helped. And I apologize if it only made the confusion worse. 

BUT WHAT ARE COMICS WITHOUT CONSTANT CONFUSION?