#Damn y'all there's something here and I can't think for the life of me

[profundcherrylady]

SINGLE DAD!SAE ITOSHI

A/N: This isn't my usual content, but I was thinking about this scenario and I had huge baby fever so I couldn't NOT write it. I love Sae too much y'all. Also sorry for any spelling mistakes english ain't my first language.

Warnings: Mentions of death and grieving, Sae tries forcing his daughter to either eat her vegetables or go to school hungry (he doesn't go through with it)(this is a very brief scene but it could still be triggering to some people). STILL MOSTLY FLUFF I SWEAR.

Contents: Sae being a girl dad fr, y'all can't change my mind on this one, also Rin being an uncle. That's pretty much it. A little ooc (Rin mostly)

"Papaaaa" Mao complained, her voice echoing across the house and making Sae drop the dishes he was washing and walk across the house into her room to see what was going on... this time. Although he had a pretty good idea given her recent tantrums.

"Can't sleep?" he inquired, but he knew the answer as soon as she saw her curling up in her little bed and pouting, her doe teal eyes looking up to him as if to give him pity. "No, Mao, you cannot come sleep in my room."

"Why not?!"

"You've already been sleeping there all week... come on, you're a big girl, you can sleep on your own room."

"But I wanna be with you..." he sighed. It had seemed she had inherited his stubbornness, because sometimes it felt like there was just no way of making her change her mind when she was set on something. He leaned against the door a little, thinking about what to say that may change her mind.

"I know I was away for a while the last couple of weeks and I understand you missed me, but I can't have this conversation with you every single night."

"Why do you go away in the first place..."

"You know why, I have to for work." he countered, "And do not ask me why I can't bring you along, we've talked about this countless of times before. I don't go away for fun. If I bring you with me, you'll want to go everywhere with me and then you'll get fussy and mad because I'll be working all the time, or worse, you'll get bored to death in the hotel. Believe me, staying here is best for you when I go on business trips."

"But I just wanna be with you!!" his eye almost twitched in annoyance at the sight; he knew that tone of voice all too well. It was another tantrum coming his way, but still, he tried to remain calm for her sake.

"You're with me now."

"So can I sleep in your room?"

"No." then she threatened to start crying. He let out a low, defeated huff, holding back the urge to roll his eyes. She just wasn't giving up, was she? Pushing himself off the doorframe, he looked back at her before speaking. "Fine. Come on."

"This is the last time." he knew damn well that was a fat lie, but he still had to at least pretend to be firm. She would grow up to be a spoiled child otherwise, or at least that's what he was used to tell himself.

The little girl beamed, quickly jumping out of bed and running towards her father. She hopped with her arms up towards him asking to be carried, to which he complied. He wrapped his arms around her small frame and lifted her up, watching as she clung onto him as if he just came back from war or something. Could he really blame her, though? She had lost her mother and he was away all the time; it would be strange if she wasn't feeling lonely.

"Papa, sing me a song." Sae reconsidered his life decisions for a moment there, not gonna lie, but how could he honestly say no to those pleading eyes?

"Fine..." he sighed, his voice soft and low as he began humming whatever song he could think of on the top of his head. Still keeping a secure hold on her, Sae began rocking his daughter to further lure her to sleep. He held her with one arm so that he could close the door of her room, the soft click assuring him that everything was in order, and then started walking a few steps towards his.

By this point, little Mao was sound asleep on his arms, and he almost chuckled at the thought of his daughter refusing to sleep until she was with him. He carefully opened the door a few meters away and walked quitely to the bed, trying his best to not wake up the sleeping child on his arms, and set her down to rest. Once tucked in and comfortable, he let out a sigh of relief. Finally, the brat was asleep and he could be at peace. She could be so clingly and energetic sometimes... not that he cared that much, even though her restlessness was exhausting, it showed that she felt safe and loved enough to be her enthusiastic self around him without any regrets.

It was weird to him, like an unfamiliar sense of pride that surged at the sight of her young daughter bouncing around and playing endlessly. He would often look at her and think about how different her personality was from his, and how much it reminded him of her mother. Sae tried not to though, as he despised comparing his daughter to his late wife over and over again, but sometimes he just couldn't help it. From the way she smiled to the color of her hair... they were just so alike each other. He still kept all the memories from her close to his heart, which in a way made him feel guilty. Sae knew just how much his daughter yearned for a maternal figure; someone to talk to and educate her about girly stuff that he may not understand. He would watch her staring at the other kids with their moms and act like it really wasn't a big deal to avoid making him feel like he wasn't enough, but Sae knew better. It was obvious to him that his daughter absolutely adored him, and he was sure she thought he was enough, but he also knew that she missed having a mom. She missed her mom. He missed her mom too.

Normally he would avoid talking about it. It had been hard enough trying to explain to this small child that her mom wasn't coming home that night, or ever, let alone process his own grief at the loss of the only woman he once loved. If he cried, he had to do it when his daughter wasn't looking, because the last thing he needed to add to his worries was worrying his daughter to the point of avoiding everything that may set off a bad mood on him. It wasn't her fault, he just felt his heart break everytime he took her home and she pointed at a framed picture of her mom exclaiming 'Mama!' Or 'Hey mama', 'I'm back, mama', 'Miss you, mama'. He would hold back his tears and take a deep breath whenever she tried asking if she could visit her mom in the place she was at (as he initially had told her it was a place where she couldn't come back), having to explain carefully that she couldn't. She would get mad and ask why a bunch of times, but he didn't have the heart to tell her 'She's dead' straight up. He really tried to just give her an excuse like that she was sleeping forever or something, as if she was in the sleeping beauty, but then she just began asking if a true love kiss from him would wake her up. She was a child, after all, and she hadn't quite grassped the concept of death yet.

He let himself watch her sleep for a few moments, sinking in the stillness of the night. Taking care of a young child made this moments rare, and he treasured whatever rest he could get. He reached out to the nightstand and picked up the heater remote, pressing a couple of buttons to turn it on a bit; just enough to keep the room warm, as he knew nights at that time of the year could become fairly cold and he didn't want his daughter getting sick. And as expected, she got very evidently more comfortable as the room became warmer, falling into a deeper state of sleep. She had only carried her favorite bunny plushie from her room to hold onto and apparently that was all she needed to fall asleep. He plopped himself onto the bed as well and fell asleep almost instantly from the exhaustion of the day, not even caring about closing the door or the half-washed dishes he left on the sink or even the fact that he hadn't even changed his clothes. He was DONE for the day.

Although, the next day he most definitely regretted it.

He had to wake up early and finish cleaning all the mess his daughter had left throughout the day, plus now he had to make breakfast, wake her up and get her to school. Sae was a rather organized person and he would normally not find himself in this type of situation, but it seemed like ever since he became a father he was running short of time for everything no matter how much he tried to plan in advance.

"Morning." Sae greeted his still somewhat sleepy child as she yawned and climbed the chair infront of her to eat. "Slept well?"

"Mhm..." Mao mumbled, rubbing her eyes with one arm while she still clung to her favorite plushie with the other. He placed a plate on the table for her and then one for him, along with his usual morning coffee and the only damned brand of juice that she liked for some reason and that he had to drive for an hour to buy.

"Come on, eat. You have preschool today."

"Can't I skip? It's snowing so muuuuch." the kid dropped her head onto the table and sighed, clearly displeased about going to school.

"Apparently it's not snowing enough to cancel your classes. Now, please, eat."

He watched intently as his daughter took a close look at the food, pouting and feeling now rather down since she wasn't allowed to skip school. She took a couple of bites of her breakfast and she had a few sips of her juice, then she pushed her plate a little to indicate she was done.

"Thanks for the food." she was about to get off the table when she was interrupted by her father's stern voice.

"Not so fast. There is no way you're full with just that."

"Yeah I am..." such an obvious lie.

"Why aren't you eating? And I want the truth."

She pouted, AGAIN, before reluctantly giving an answer.

"It has green peppers on it..." and there you have it; this was the real challenge of Sae's day.

"I told you, they're good for you."

"But they're gross! Can I eat something else please?" this is Sae's life now. Even winning a soccer match was easier than getting his daughter to eat her vegetables.

"Mao, I spent a lot of time making breakfast for you, can you please finish your food? You still need to get ready to go to school. I don't have any time to make you more breakfeast; I have to go work."

"But... I really don't like them... please?" that was the last straw for him. He didn't mean to sound cruel, but he was tired and didn't know what else to say.

"Mao Itoshi, you're staying on this table until the last bite of food on your plate is GONE. If you don't, you'll go to school hungry and I'm not making you anything else after I pick you up. You are eating this one way or another." he almost instantly regretted the harsh tone of voice he had used, as he saw his kid's eyes begin watering. He passed his hands through his face in exasperation, took a deep breath, and walked around the table to pick her up. He exhaled, trying his best to remain calm before speaking to her again, as he could feel Mao's tears on his clothes and the little shudders she made at the effort to hold back tears. Sae patted and passed his fingers through his daughter's hair in a poor attempt to soothe her, but the damage was already done. She was holding thay bunny plush in her arms like a lifeline. "Sorry, okay? I didn't mean to be so hard on you. I woke up early to make your breakfast and you just took a few bites of it... I got frustrated, but that wasn't a reason to force you to eat something you don't like. I'm just saying, green peppers aren't the end of the world; they can be tasty."

"I guess I can eat them..." he sighed.

"No, you'll just be eating them out of guilt. You shouldn't do things you don't want to just because you're afraid of someone's bad mood." he thought for a moment. Mao eating the green peppers wasn't the ideal result now, she was hurt and vulnerable and that would only teach her that she should fear and comply which wouldn't end well on the long run... still, he did spend his time making her breakfast and didn't want it to go to waste. "Tell you what. I'll eat the green peppers for today, if you promise you'll at least try them next time, and I'll find another recipe to try to make them taste better. Sound good?" she nodded, still hiding her face from him by pressing it against his clothes. "Good. Now, I really don't have more time to make you more breakfast, so let's pick out the stuff you don't like just this once, and only this one time. I seriously need you to try to learn to eat your vegetables."

"...'kay."

"Let's hurry then; you still need to get ready for school."

Sae for sure was missing having some help on the raising of his daughter. He would never admit it though, he would try and pretend parenting was the easiest thing in the world when in reality he was fighting for his life everyday trying to shape this little human into a good person, and refraining from helping her while she failed at tying her shoe countless of times before admiting she didn't know how to do it (this is why he only buys her velcro).

He left the tiny sparkling pink shoes on the ground as he heard the doorbell, then looked at the clock hanging from the wall nearby. 8:14am, who in the world was it this early? Sae indicated his daughter to stay still on the couch before walking towards the door, and right after seeing the face on the other side he furrowed his eyebrows in surprise.

"Rin? What are you doing here?" his little brother then proceeded to push him aside and step inside as if it were his own house.

"Move, I didn't come here for you." his eyes traveled the room and eventually fell on the little girl sitting on the couch, and in a blink of an eye he had lifted the little girl up and hugged her tightly. Despite her surprise, she could obviously recognize her only favorite uncle.

To everyone's surprise, Rin absolutely adored his niece. Sure he had problems with his older brother but he didn't have to take it out on an innocent child that had done nothing to him. Besides, she was so adorable and bubbly and so NOT like Sae. Rin sometimes would stare at her in amazement, wondering how it was possible that this was truly Sae's spawn; yet the teal eyes and lower lashes were unmistakable. She was an Itoshi alright.

"Umclw Rwin!" her voice came out muffled, as she was currently being burried on his chest, but the sentiment was there.

"What are you doing here?" Sae was straight to the point, not caring about his cold tone of voice this time. And he says he doesn't have favorites.

"I just came back from my morning run." the younger Itoshi explained, still not looking at him in the eye. "Thought I'd stop by to say hello."

"To her."

"Yes, I didn't want to talk to your pathetic-"

"Language."

"Shut up."

"Don't hug her when you're still sweaty and gross, she just took a bath." he continued scolding Rin, earning a groan of frustration from him.

"Your dad is so annoying." his niece giggled at the obvious beef between his dad and uncle. She didn't really understand it but it was funny from her point of view. "Such lukewarm rules he has."

"Lukewarm!" she repeated.

"Rin, stop teaching her those words. Mao, say bye to your uncle; we have to get you to school."

"Awwwwww, can he come with?"

"Fine, whatever will get you to actually go to school. Rin, let's go."

"Don't boss me around." he complained, walking with his niece on his arms towards the door and setting her down. "Let's put on our shoes, shall we?" he took the shoes Sae had set down earlier and helped the kid put them on with ease. Of course, he had dealt with this countless of times before. Sae had the bad habit of using him as a free nanny for whenever he had to travel, which was often.

"Uncle Rin, how do you go running with all this snow? It's so cold!"

"When you run, you sweat and then it doesn't feel so cold." he finished tying the kid's shoelaces and took her by the hand, then Sae picked up a scarf wrapped it carefully around her neck.

"Don't take it off." he warned, watching as she began squirming to get away from the scratchy scarf. "It's cold out, I don't want you getting sick."

"Okay, papa." he gave her a quick kiss on the forehead before taking her free hand and not so subtly making Rin let go of her as he finally opened the front door. They were quickly hit by the cold winter air, and Mao shuddered a little at the sudden change in temperature.

Stil, Sae made sure his hand was holding hers tight and that she kept herself on his field of vision. There would be someday in the future where she wouldn't need him to hold her hand; he had to treasure these moments and not let her go while he still could.

[xbraveheartx]

New reaction meme-- 3, 2, 1, GO

[solaireverie]

cl16 | salute to me, i'm your american queen

pairing: charles leclerc x f!sargeant!reader

summary: [ social media au ] what the fuck is a kilometer?!?! or: charles and his girlfriend's adventures

warnings: language

faceclaim: elle fanning + pinterest

author's note: i can't explain this except that it was funny in my head. i should probably be working on the next part of deep blue but ehhhhhh. enjoy!

liked by charles_leclerc, logansargeant, vogue and 763,913 others

yourusername Overjoyed with becoming an official @.tiffanyandco ambassador 🩵 Shop the Formula 1 Commemorative Grand Prix collection on their website, now available worldwide.

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charles_leclerc so this is why you couldn't come to monza? 😨

↪ yourusername sorry babe it was scheduled in advance 🥲

user damn tiffany's marketing department really popped off with choosing THE y/n sargeant to rep this line 💅

↪ user like if you think about it it's really smart, y/n isn't just one of the most popular models rn, she's also directly connected to the sport bc of logan and charles

↪ user she is literally all i want to be in the best way 😤

logansargeant where's my charger y/n? i know you have it

↪ yourusername this could've been a text message logie boy

↪ logansargeant wtf don't call me that

↪ logansargeant also you haven't unblocked me yet from that time i stole your life-size cardboard cutout of charles and brought it to williams hospitality

↪ yourusername you're not helping your case here 😒

↪ carlossainz55 silvia was looking for that y/n 😱

charles_leclerc has added to their story

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694,332 likes

f1wagupdate @.yourusername is in the paddock today for the US GP after being spotted yesterday in a hotel near the track! She has been seen in the Ferrari garage.

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user uhhh why isn't she in the williams garage???

↪ user uhhh probably cause she's dating a ferrari driver???

↪ user chill 😭 i'm sure she'll drop by

↪ user just say you're a hater and move on bro

charles_leclerc has added to their story

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yourusername has added to their story

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logansargeant replied to your story

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tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc Happy birthday my love 🥳❤️ I'm glad you had fun at your party 😉

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yourusername DELETE THE THIRD PICTURE

yourusername HOW COULD YOU

yourusername WHAT IS THIS BETRAYAL

yourusername count your days, charles leclerc

↪ logansargeant she just left the restaurant, i think you need to take her threats seriously dude

user charles is just like all the other sassy boyfriends out there 😂

user damn the road's looking real comfy tonight (i want what they have)

↪ yourusername oh dear don't do anything rash please 😭

↪ user this is why i love y/n lmao even when she's pissed at her bf she finds time to be the nicest human being ever

liked by charles_leclerc, logansargeant, yourbestfriend and 6,129,320 others

yourusername just a bit older 🤟

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gigihadid happy birthday darling 🥰

↪ yourusername thank you gigi!

logansargeant happy bday sis :)

↪ yourusername AWWWW LOGAN 🥹

user is charles still alive??? 😭😭😭

↪ yourusername who knows? 🤷‍♀️

↪ charles_leclerc i already said i'm sorry!!!

↪ yourusername do y'all hear something?

↪ charles_leclerc we're literally on instagram y/n... 😐

carlossainz55 y/n, charles says that he'll do anything if you'll talk to him again...

↪ yourusername he knows what i want 😪

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tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc Thank you for making my life so much better just by existing in it. I love you more than words can express. At the end of the day, you're who I want by my side. I'm so glad that I'll get to call you my wife for the rest of my life 🤍

💍 11.11.23

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yourusername je t'aime 🤍

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masterlist | taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora

[chuplayswithfire]

Damn some of y'all bitches can't take a break from hating on woman for one fucking week!!!!!

Damn. It's crazy how women are not allowed to make fun of and get stressed about a class of people that oppress us structurally on the REGULAR

And what's wild as hell is how some of y'all have finally understood that making fun and clowning on white people is okay, but you don't think that making fun of men is okay, and it's like what the fuck do you think is the difference here buddy? Being a man is as much a social construct as being white is, if we gonna make fun of the white people for their shit and their white supremacy and the colonizing that is taking place all over the world to uplift white people for the sake of white people...

THEN WHAT THE HELL makes you think we're not going to make fun of men who have benefited tremendously across human history by the patriarchy, which is not something that is considered every time and place in HISTORY, but sure is something that existed every time and place now???

Miss me with that not all men bullshit, I don't understand how so many of y'all can grasp that a hit dog will holler when we talk about white people being ain't shit, with folks recognizing that if it don't apply to you then it ain't being said to you,

but if women want to express frustration about men and the patriarchy, and the ways in which misogyny affects every woman's life, suddenly we got to be tiptoeing around going oh no, it can't hurt the men's feelings cuz if we hurt the men's feelings some of them will get radicalized and want to kill us all

miss me with this bullshit. i remember a time when we correctly identified not all men as the same bullshit as white lives matter, but times change huh

[gorebonk]

Monsterblr dashboard simulator

🥩 Sam-is-barking Follow

Some of y'all be forgetting that cur is literally a werewolf slur?? Can you stop appropriating it???

🩸 Bloodluster1226 Follow

We'll stop saying cur when you stop calling us vampire's leeches

🥩 Sam-is-barking Follow

Wow another entitled vampire getting involved in something because it's not about them for once

🧹 Witching_hour Follow

Damn I thought vamps and weres were chill

🥩 Sam-is-barking Follow

You thought wrong 😭😭

(1.2k notes)

🦴 Pansy-pup Follow

In my A/B/O breeding era rn

🐶 Certifiedpuppyboy Follow

I have a knot right here 🥵🥵

👻 Ghoulish-tendencies Follow

(36 notes)

🧛 Dracruella Follow

I feel so guilty I fully just ate one of my coworkers 😥

🧛 Dracruella Follow

Ok I think I'm gonna turn him 😓

#I know his girlfriend really well I don't wanna make it awkward #Drac.txt

(3 notes)

💀 Skelesbian Follow

Butch4Butch Vampwolf relationship end post

💀 Skelesbian Follow

Easy website

(34.6k notes)

🍖 Warriorwolf-fan6672 Follow

Just saw a post supporting Vampire/Werewolf relationships, I can't believe some people still advocate for that kinda shit

🔮 Crystalballsaysyougay Follow

You know if they're both consenting adults there is literally nothing wrong with it and you need to stop putting people down with stupid outdated ideology. I bet you're one of those monsters who think vampires can only drink virgin blood aswell

🍖 Warriorwolf-fan6672 Follow

Ok come crying back to me when your impure blood turns out to be killing you

🔮 Crystalballsaysyougay Follow

Op get a grip challenge??? You are literally proving how outdated your views are??

(351 notes)

💡 Monster-shower-thoughts Follow

Do you think you can fuck a ghost so hard they come back to life?

#Monster shower thoughts #Ghosts

(16 notes)

🐺 Moon-luver69 Follow

On this edition of todays pups are alright I saw some pups today walking out of the forest, proudly holding six dead pheasants and the shorter one said "That guy won't be calling us mongrels again." So yeah, good for those little guys for standing up for themselves and I hope that guy gets wooden staked ❤️❤️

🪦 actuallyundeadXD Follow

Aww thats so cute good for them and I hope we can move on from the idea that all of todays pups are soft and weak!!

(2.3k notes)

🌗Thatswhatshewoofed Follow

I turned last night and pissed all over the kitchen 😭😭😭

(2 notes)

[vrmxlho]

-ˏˋ ur socials as sae's gf ˊˎ-

-`♡ ´- liked by karasu, mikage and 876 others

yn: why is this man making me gym im already hot enough 😒😒😣😣

tagged: sae

sae: may i remind you that you came willingly ?

↳ yn: that doesn't make a good caption tho does it?

↳ sae: whatever

↳ sae: but you're right, you are hot enough

↳ yn: oh 😏

itoshi_rin: how you are able to deal with someone so flippant and rude is bewildering

↳ karasu: charity work fr

↳ sae: this is why isagi's better

↳ itoshi_rin: bitch ass

↳ isagi_11: ty bae 🫶 🫶 🫶

↳ sae: never speak to me directly again

-`♡´- liked by itoshi_rin, mikage and 987 others

yn: literal love of my life

location: disneysea, tokyo

sae: why am i competing with a little green man?

↳ itoshi_rin: cuz he has a better personality than you ❤️

↳ sae: do you have a death wish?

↳ isagi_11: rin using emojis is gonna haunt me forever

↳ 666666: fr i crange 😧

sae: i'm never taking you to disneysea again...

↳ yn: yk i love you so so much, right?

↳ yn: but u being jealous is saur funny 🤭

↳ sae: i'm not jealous

↳ yn: you're so cute

↳ sae: shut up

↳ itoshi_rin: oh my god just blind me already

-`♡ ´- liked by eggod, mikage and 1.6k others

yn: 🖤💖

tagged: blackpinkofficial, sae

eggod: man’s is literally sulking at the concert of the century smh

↳ kaisersexc: he’s sad they’re more famous 🤣🤣

↳ 666666: LMFAOOOO

↳ sae: strikers think they're so cool when they can't even score goals without a midfielder

↳ yn: pls stop being a football nerd, love...

↳ eggod: why are y'all still replying i don't wanna see any of this

yn: @sae you're pretty even when you sulk 🫶

↳ sae: i wasn't sulking

↳ itoshi_rin: must've been difficult not getting yn's attention

↳ yn: rin ily but pls stop fighting under my posts this is why they invented dms!!

↳ 666666: you HWAT 😱😱😰

↳ yn: nagi stop instigating 🙁

-`♡ ´- liked by mikage, isagi_11 and 2k others

sae: here i posted you now will you hop off my dick??

tagged: yn

666666: pls keep your bedroom activities to yourself??

↳ sae: stop being a perv nagi

↳ 666666: YOU KNOW MY NAME???

karasu: never thought i’d see a man ask for this

↳ eggod: ong he must be crazy!

↳ karasu: nah ur just a touch-deprived loser

↳ eggod: dawg 💔😞

yn: SAE???? WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT CAPTION

↳ sae: did you not want me to post you?

↳ yn: yeah but you could've written something cute or smth 😒

↳ sae: i'm not writing something corny i dont like pda

↳ yn: wtf 💔

↳ sae: i still love you

↳ yn: OKASGJDBFS THIS MAKES UP FOR EVERYTHING

sae: yn told me she likes calvin klein so i became a calvin klein model

tagged: calvinkleinjp

yn: UR SO HOT FOR THIS 😭😭

yn: come home rn

↳ sae: i'm training

yn: i wanna make out w you

↳ sae: nvm i finished early

↳ yn: thought so 😇

yn: in those 😏

↳ itoshi_rin: oh for fucks sake

666666: what the fuck are these prices?

↳ yn: bffr nobody's looking at those prices

↳ 666666: you're the only person alive attracted to that ogre

↳ itoshi_rin: i'm in love with you

↳ 666666: oh damn 😏

[dixons-sunshine]

Saw your birthday post and I’m here to say dad!daryl especially during pregnancy would be act like a caveman. You’re growing his child? He’s hunting for a mounting of food (more specifically animals especially deer) and presenting them to you like he’s at an altar. You want something. He’s already got it. Craving something that’s lots to the old world? Don’t worry he’ll do his best and if not he’ll find a suitable replacement. Dad!daryl would do anything for you already, and now you’re with his child… you really get to see how far he’d go.

Let’s not mention if you were ever in a position where he thinks you’d be in danger because he’s animalistic ensuring that you and his baby are okay.

Thank you for listening to my ted talk

Also happy early birthday!!

No because I think about this on a daily basis. You'd think I'm lying but I'm not. The amount of times I think of Daryl as a dad should be illegal lol. My own thoughts under the cut. (Sorry this isn't a proper fic. I didn't know how to write this in a way that would be in a way you deserve, but I loved this so much and didn't want this to go to waste, so I'm doing this. Hope it's okay!)

Basically everything you said is so freaking true. As far as I'm aware, aka on what I've seen in movies and what my mom has told me, the correct meat is an essential part to a pregnant woman's diet. Oh, boy, once you're pregnant and the doctor says that you need protein? You be rest assured that Daryl is not resting until he finds you the best goddamn venison he can. No rabbit or squirrel meat for the love of his life and his unborn baby. Y'all deserve only the best. He'd even fight tooth and nail if he could only find a small deer and there wouldn't be enough venison for everyone in the community and everyone wanted some. You needed it more than they did, and he'd hold someone at gunpoint if he needed to.

I've also wondered a lot about Daryl finding whatever you're craving. A few nights ago, I was really craving chips (fries) but I couldn't go buy any, so I had to make my own. While making it (at 3am if I may add) I thought about Daryl making you what you're craving during your pregnancy. If he can't find what you're craving outside the walls, he's gonna try his damn best to make it. Fries? He's picking potatoes out of the community's garden to make you that. You want a sandwich? He's gonna make you a sandwich. You want some crisps (chips)? He can't make it, but he's not gonna rest until he finds you some. It may be stale, but he doesn't care. Anything for you.

I've seen a couple of videos where the guy stands behind his pregnant partner and raises their belly to relieve some pressure. Daryl would do that! I read it in my favourite dad!Daryl series (Blood Ties by @celtic-crossbow. If you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend it!) and I was like “yes, he would totally do that!” Anything that would help make you even the slightest bit more comfortable, he'd do it. Also, I feel like it would bring a sense of comfort to him when he does that. It'd make him feel more connected with his baby before they're born, y'know?

Don't even get me started on Daryl being extremely overprotective of you. He doesn't want you to be in any sort of danger in general, but the need to keep you safe when you're carrying his baby increases by a tenfold. Your escapades beyond the walls are put on a hold for the foreseeable future. Anything you need beyond the walls, he'll get it for you. And if you don't want him to leave you, he'll get someone else to do it for him. He wouldn't ever let you willingly put yourself in danger, and if you ever were in danger, the people responsible for it would pay dearly.

I have a lot of thoughts on this but my brain isn't working with me right now. Thank you so much for sending this in! I really loved this so much.

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#50: The Dream Come True (1.05)

gif cred: @machonnes

This moment is a dream come true for Rick. A dream come true for Michonne. And a dream come true for many of us. 😭

It's also a top 10 all-time Richonne scene to me. 😭 For a long while my favorite thing Rick had ever said to Michonne was “How’d I get so lucky finding you?” And then TOWL came along and Rick was saying some of the most romantic lines possible throughout this miniseries. And in this breathtaking scene right here, Rick says my official favorite thing he’s ever said to Michonne. The whole moment is the epitome of beautiful 🥹💍...

Before we even get into this breakdown, you know I gotta dance and shout because Won't 🎉 He 🎉 Do 🎉 It...

Y'all, I am so grateful that our captains ensured this ship and this fandom stayed blessed and highly favored at every possible turn. 🙌🏽😇And this scene right here is an all-caps BLESSING. 🥳

After taking out Jadis, Richonne is back walking in the woods and Rick points out where her helicopter is ahead. He then says, “What you said to me before in front of her, it wasn’t just for her.” I like how Rick already knows Michonne was not bluffing with Jadis.

And Michonne replies, “You couldn’t have changed them by yourself, Rick. But together - 'the whole damn world.'” It always makes me smile hearing Michonne say this in ep 5 after hearing Rick say it in ep 4 because Dream Michonne said it in ep 1. 😊

Rick’s mind really does know Michonne well because what he imagined her saying is something she’s now saying in reality and believing wholeheartedly. She knows the two of them together can make the world the good place they believe it should be.

I also think it’s sweet how Michonne doesn’t think Rick should have to try and change them alone. She’s never felt Rick should have to carry anything alone. 🥲 And now that she’s back with him, she’s with him all the way, so now changing the CRM is their shared mission. See, even Dream Michonne is always right 😌...

Michonne says, “I see how we could make it better, and if we can, Rick, we have to.” Thats Richonne for you. 😌 When called to step up and help others they always do. 👌🏽 I love that they know what they’re capable of and care to make it their responsibility to fight for others.

And now they’re taking a more balanced approach because before, Rick thought he’d have to essentially give up his life to fight for future generations - but now they know they can stop the CRM and still go home and live life together with their family as well.

As Michonne speaks, Rick turns to her when she says his name, and when she's finished talking, she continues walking forward. But then Rick stops her. 😍

And y’all...I’m already twirling my hair and kicking my feet just from the moment he takes her arm and says, “Michonne, wait.” 🥲

gif cred: @nat111love

The moment before he takes her arm you can see Rick looking at Michonne like he truly doesn't want to let one more second go by without proposing to her. He's waited practically a decade for this moment and he can't wait any longer. 🥲 Especially with the hefty undertaking they're about to do with stopping the CRM, I love that he wants to make sure they have this private moment between them before all that happens.

When talking about the proposal dream in episode 1, I had said that Rick’s thought process was “Before we make the world ours, I want to make you mine.” And I feel like that’s also what plays out in real life in this scene. Because before they go and save the world, he first wants Michonne to know just how much she saved his, and that he’s forever hers. 🥹

So Rick stops her and then they face each other and Rick says, “I’ve been wanting to say something.” And y’all, the little nervous breath he takes after he says that. 😭 It makes my heart melt that Rick is nervous for this proposal moment. Similar to his nervousness in the Say Yes proposal moment.

He and Michonne have already been through everything together and he knows they’re committed to each other forever, Michonne has literally said yes to creating life with him already - but Rick is still nervous in these woods because this is still a big important moment for them. 🥹

gif cred: @nat111love

Seeing Rick’s endearing nervousness, it's like you can see a glimpse of the boy he likely was in high school who, while Shane was probably running game and smooth-talking all these girls, Rick was being more reserved. It also makes you see the man who only ever wanted to give all that love in his good kind heart to one woman, the right woman, and now he's found her - he finally found the perfect woman for him who loves the way he shows love and loves him back just as fiercely. 🥹

It’s sweet how much Rick feels like he hit the ultimate jackpot getting Michonne. And his energy both in the dream 'proposal' and in this irl proposal depicts how he still feels like this woman, whose heart he has so completely, is someone he truly lucked out in finding. It’s like even after all these years, he still can’t believe he got so lucky finding her. And not just finding her, but finding that she wants him as much as he wants her.

Michonne is an extraordinary gift to him and Rick knows it. He’s known it for years. That’s why when he tells Michonne that he’s been wanting to say something, he means not just for the last few hours or days, but for nearly a decade he’s been wanting to tell her exactly what he says in this proposal - a proposal he’s thought about and dreamt about often.

Rick takes the ring out of his shirt pocket and I love how even part of why it takes him a minute to get the ring out is because he’s staring at her. Still as entranced as ever. 😋(Also it’s cute how the blood on his forehead even looks like an 'm.' He’s hers for real.😇)

gif cred: @riickgrimes

I love the way Michonne looks at Rick as he takes out the ring. She has this moment of just looking at him so adoringly before even shifting her focus down to the ring that he holds up.

And then when she sees the ring, her face softens and she has this little smile and quiet breath and once again it just melts my heart. 😭

gif cred: @nat111love

I always get so reflective on Richonne's overall journey with scenes like this. So I think about how Rick took out mints from his pocket and that ushered in Richonne's romantic relationship, and now here he takes a wedding ring from his pocket, wanting to further cement that Michonne is his wife. The best. 😭

And then because he’s the greatest loverboy to ever exist, Rick holds up the ring and says, “It’s a broken world, Michonne, and you’re the only thing that puts it back together.” 🥹🥹🥹

If you think I’m squealing like a fool every time I hear this…you are correct. 🫠🥳 It’s so perfect and so powerful hearing Rick say this.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Part of what makes Rick and Michonne’s love story so special is that it depicts how a love so healthy and whole can grow and blossom even against the backdrop of a broken world. 

Andy really summed Richonne up perfectly in saying that they’re perfect partners in an imperfect world. And that was beautifully illustrated in this special ep 5 scene and all throughout Richonne's TWD/TOWL journey.

Also, after all those CRM folk tried to take credit for saving Rick’s life, it’s great that in his proposal he gives Michonne the credit for being the only one to put his world and the whole damn world back together. 

The way there’s so much emotion and sincerity as he whispers this. And I love how he says the only thing. Like the way this man constantly gives Michonne her flowers and acknowledges her as the greatest influence on his life is really something. 👏🏽🥹

gif cred: @sharpesjoy

And as many have already noted, this wording is especially special when thinking back to season 3, when Rick was going through an extremely tough time mentally after the death of Lori.

Rick imagined speaking to Lori on the phone and there he became emotional saying that he couldn’t put the pieces back together. And it is just beyond beautiful and full circle that now Rick can look into Michonne’s eyes and tell her that she is the one who was finally able to put it all back together for him and with him. 🥲

gif cred: @riickgrimes

I always say Rick and Michonne didn’t just find a second love in each other but a supreme love. The best love. They found the one. 💯 And particularly, they found the one who helps them make the world make sense and make life so worth living.

In plenty of TWD scenes between Richonne, it's clear that Michonne makes all the sense in the world to Rick and that she makes his world feel intact. Even pre-canon, as soon as Rick and Michonne realize they can trust each other, Rick has so many moments where it's clear he wants and needs her safe because she matters a lot to him and she's the North Star in his world.

gif cred: @michonnegrimes

And no matter what else was going on, no matter how much was going through his head, Michonne could always reach Rick and he’d always hear her and resonate with what she’d say, what she thought, and where she’d lead him. She both repaired his broken world and made it so much brighter.

When Rick says Michonne is what puts the broken world back together, you just know he’s been wanting to say this exact thing for such a long time because he’s been aware of it for such a long time.

I think about how in season 7 Rick was aware that Michonne was the one who had led him this far and reinstilled in him the will to fight back.

gif cred: @michonnegrimes

And now in The Ones Who Live, Rick gets to share that he’s aware that even despite the vast darkness and the heavy brokenness of this apocalyptic world, the world still hasn’t entirely fallen apart. And why? Because she puts it back together. 🥹

gif cred: @sharpesjoy

I love how he doesn’t even just say his world, but the world. Rick has always felt like Michonne can bring everybody to the light like she’s done for him countless times.

When I think about how much Rick and Michonne have been through it fully warms my heart to think that Rick reflects back and feels it’s Michonne that kept their world together.

And it makes sense. From the moment she showed up in Rick’s life, she began putting pieces back together.

She provided formula for his baby girl. She became the best friend his son needed. She saved his life against the Governor. She became wholly committed to being a part of Rick and Carl's family as they healed and traveled on the road to Terminus and she gave Carl and Rick warm lighthearted moments even despite this dark world. She co-led with Rick and led team family to their longest-standing home ASZ. And she became a fantastic mother to the Grimes children.

Then through Rick and Michonne’s romantic relationship, she gave Rick something personal to have and enjoy for himself that wasn’t strictly about leading, protecting, providing, but really living and loving too.

She gave him the strength to fight back and free themselves from the Saviors, and particularly instrumental was the way she built Rick back up after the devastating loss of their son Carl. ❤️‍🩹

I don’t think Rick survives that incredibly painful loss the way he did without Michonne being by his side, and I think Rick would cosign that.

And even after that loss, where Rick’s world could have easily gone completely dark and bleak, instead he found a way to honor Carl’s memory and be present with the family he still has in his wife and daughter - so much so, that Rick even had enough hope in both the future and his love with Michonne that he and her planned to have a baby. 🥲

Then, Rick's world actually did go dark only once he’s taken from Michonne. 💔

And it’s dreaming of her that keeps him going and keeps his world from ending. But when he can’t get to her anymore in dreams or reality, he forces himself to die while alive because he believes there is no scenario where he can be alive in this world without her.

But then she showed up again.

Michonne reentered his life in real life and fought so hard for him even when he had convinced himself that he’s stuck and not worth fighting for. Her love helped him see the light again and made him come alive again.

And after the CRM broke Rick's world and his heart by taking away the image of Carl, Michonne even restored one of the most vital parts of his world - his son - to him with the phone portrait of their beloved boy. 🥹

And now that they’re finally on the same page about going home together, Rick gets to actually look forward to being a father again to both his daughter and the son Michonne gave him. 🥹

Like if this isn’t the epitome of Hershel’s lovely sentiment that 'things break but they can still grow' and a whole new plant will arise, I don't know what is. Because even while Rick was away and feeling alone in the CRM, his family was still growing and his legacy was still living on and expanding through RJ. 😭

I just say all this to say that when Rick tells Michonne she is the only thing that puts the world back together, he means that from the bottom of his heart. Because it’s a scientific fact. 

Again, I'll forever love that Rick is utterly in love with the woman who changed his mantra from ‘We’re the Walking Dead’ to ‘We’re The Ones Who Live.’ Michonne changed his life. She saved his life. She brought him back to life. She put his world back together.

And it makes sense that Rick put an asterisk on their motto and felt he's only the one who lives if he lives with her - because an intense element of soulmates is now part of your very heart and soul lives outside of your body. They are that one. And I love the way Richonne operate as one throughout the flagship show and this miniseries to the point that they can both declare belonging to each other.

So y’all, clearly the "It's a broken world, Michonne, and you're the only thing that puts it back together" line alone was enough to have me reveling for days. But once again Richonne reminded me that there is no ceiling on how beautiful their love story can get as Rick then tells Michonne:

“‘Til my last breath, I am yours.”

gif cred: @sharpesjoy

PERFECTION. My heart can’t even handle it. 😭

That line is breathtakingly beautiful for so many reasons but especially for how Rick wants Michonne to know she’s the one for him past, present, future, forever. I adore that Rick so happily belongs to Michonne. And til his last breath. That couldn’t be more romantic. 🥹

It’s also so fitting because he’s saying that so long as he’s breathing he’s hers. And we visibly saw that play out. Because along Rick's years-long journey, he’s been alive, he’s been dead, and both versions still were madly in love with Michonne. All versions of Rick love Michonne. So truly as long as there is air in his lungs, he knows that any version of him will be hers. ♥️

And my heart is so happy for both of the characters to see Rick finally get his dream of directly telling Michonne, his North Star, that she’s the only thing that puts this broken world back together and he forever belongs to her. I love the way Rick always is aware of, vocalizes, and appreciates Michonnes immense importance. He knows there is no other that mends the world quite like her.

Then Rick just makes my heart burst even more when he gets down on one knee while holding up the ring. This perfect scene just kept getting more perfect with each second. 🥹

gif cred: @nat111love

I absolutely adore that Rick stayed wanting to wife Michonne up any chance he could. Whether it's over dinner on their Say Yes honeymoon run, with a priest on a bridge like he was planning, in a dream on an idyllic park bench, and now here in reality, on one knee in a forest. 🥹

And I also love that this proposal comes in the fifth episode too. 5 Episodes & A Wedding Ring. 😊

I'll forever celebrate that we really got pretty much every single thing we could have ever wanted from The Ones Who Live. 😭 Like they really knew our Richonne wishlists and said...

A huge thank you once again to Danai for being the one behind this decision to have a Richonne proposal moment. And of course, Andy delivered this whole moment flawlessly. 👏🏽 Those two are a true gift. 🎁

I know for many of us we consider that Say Yes dinner scene to be a Richonne proposal. And I still do view it like that, but I also love that in TOWL we get an even more direct and clear-cut proposal moment. Richonne was already so married but it’s great seeing them want to solidify it even further.

And I call it a proposal moment since there’s the whole Rick on one knee giving Michonne a ring, but I also really like how it feels like a proposal between a couple that already knows their husband and wife. A vow renewal of sorts.

We kinda get the best of both worlds too with Rick clearly saying a muted “Will you marry me?” in the scene. I don’t mind that it's muted because we get to visually see him say it while also knowing that it doesn’t even really need to be a question. The beautiful words that Rick said just before getting down on one knee are almost more of a vow to the woman he knows is and has long been his wife. And this is his reaffirming vow to be her devoted husband forever.

And I adore how this all goes to show that part of why Rick always seems so determined to give Michonne the world is because he knows she’s the one who put his back together. 🥹

gif cred: @riickgrimes

So this part already did me in but y'all, it's not done because now we get to see Michonne's lovely reaction to her man's heartfelt declaration. And after 50 of these RIR posts, I think it's clear I'm extra as all get out, so of course I have to do a Part Two of this lovely dream-come-true scene. 👌🏽😌

[mmhcs]

Miguel O'Hara x Tall!Reader

A/N: (I haven't seen many fics covering this topic so I thought that I'd throw my hat in the ring today). This is dedicated to all the tall girls out there! Y'all are beautiful and amazing!

Warnings: Slightly suggestive, but mostly SFW focus on legs, reader is female(if you'd like to see a gender-neutral version, please let me know!), reader is described as having a curvier lower body (only at one point, though), Miguel is absolutely head-over-heels for reader (pun-intended!)

Okay, y'all. Look at this man. He is 6'9". Big. Very big. Often times, he's the biggest person in the room. Tall and intimidating. And while he likes that (he is the big, scary boss. Hear him roar!), there are times in which he wishes that there was somebody who could relate to him. Like, do you know how hard it is to find shoes at 6'9"?

Now, don't get him wrong, Miguel loves women of all shapes and sizes. Short, tall, average height, skinny, chubby - he doesn't care. But when he saw you? It was like he had a spiritual awakening. Seeing you walk down the hallways of the Spider Society, suit hugging your curves...It did something to him.

Especially when he saw the mold of your legs. For the first time in a long time, Miguel felt himself getting a little nervous. Never had he seen another Spider dominate the room like you did. During your first few days, people used to stare whenever you entered the room - not out of fear as they did with him - but out of awe. You were gorgeous but your height - it just took you over the top.

From your first day forward, all Miguel would hear about is you.

"Did you see the new Spider?" "Yeah, she's really tall! What do you think she does in her professional life? Model?" "Oh my gosh, look at her! She looks good in that suit!"

Whenever you and Miguel would have conversations, he found it hard to focus. First, you have a stunning face but those legs? Oh, he was a goner. Though he had only seen you with in your Spider-suit, Miguel couldn't help but take a liking to your legs. Your thighs, though comprised of muscle - jiggled when you walked, and your calves looked as firm as his demeanor on a bad morning. Miguel had never had a thing for legs before (or at least not to his knowledge) but now he found himself fascinated by your legs and their length and angles. He could spend days worshipping the curvature between your calves and thighs.

When Miguel finally does see you out of uniform? He needs to leave the room. Don't ask why, he just does.

When you two finally start dating, Miguel can't take his eyes off of you. All he can do is stare (mainly at your legs) and thank Padre Dios that he managed to pull you into his life.

But, while what initially made you stand out to Miguel was your height, it actually doesn't play that big of a role in your relationship. As time goes on and lust simmers into love, you and Miguel are just a regular couple.

Though he doesn't spend much time in his home (or didn't until you), Miguel's space is tailor-made for him. Meaning chairs, couches, tables, and shelves big and high enough to accommodate him and his height. While a small thing to note, he's glad that he finally has someone doesn't find issue with it all.

Miguel is aware of the of the stereotypes and jabs thrown at girls of your stature and so he does his best to constantly remind you that you are beautiful, attractive, feminine, etc.

If you're shorter than him (doesn't even matter if it's an inch), he likes to crack short jokes with you here and there.

"Bebita, come look at this!" Miguel yells from his in front of your bedroom's television. "What is it, Miguel?" you ask, peaking your head out of the bathroom. "They say it's going to be windy today," He juts his chin towards the TV screen before refocusing on tying his tie. "Take precaution." "Miguel," you scoff. "What? I don't want you getting swept up by the wind." "Okay, firstly, you know damn well-"

If you're taller than him, Miguel also has jokes for that.

"Bebita, could you please pass me that plate over there?" Miguel asks, pointing his chin at a cabinet shelf that is directly at eye level with him. "Miguel," you give him a pointed look. He shrugs at you, continuing to wash the dishes. "Hey, don't put things up so high if you don't want me to ask you to get them." (For the next week, you started putting all the dishes in the bottom drawer)

The jokes, however, are only reserved for him. If anyone else makes a joke about your height, Miguel gets upset. Just ask Hobie. One time, Hobie asked you how you couldn't tell him what the weather was like from up there (all in good fun) and Miguel, who had no context of the conversation and walked in at the wrong time almost crucified him.

Miguel secretly loves how you two look together. As the head of the Spider Society (again, he likes to be the big, scary boss man), he enjoys the presence that you two create together. Domineering, commanding. Whether you two are in uniform or formal clothing - when you two talk, people listen.

If you work out, Miguel loves to go to the gym with you. Not only because he likes to see you in workout gear (though trust him, that is a very, very, very big plus) but because he finally has somebody who understands the struggle of putting on (visible) muscle.

Miguel loves kisses with you. He's always been very big physical touch in relationships but never before has it been so easy to just steal a kiss. And so, it has been become his favorite pastime.

Miguel loves to see you in dresses and shorts and heels. Anything that accentuates your height. Sometimes when you come home, you see a dress or a new pair of shoes that you've been wanting. However, other times, you find an article of clothing or shoes from a brand that you didn't even know existed. But if it's jeans or a maxi dress, they always cover your legs, if it's a regular shirt, your stomach isn't exposed, and whatever it is always looks good on you.

Sometimes when cuddling, Miguel will just start tracing and/or kneading random parts of your body because there's just so much of you to love and he doesn't know where to start.

At the end of each and every day, no matter if you're taller or shorter than him, Miguel likes to make you feel safe and protected. He likes to play the role of protector/provider and makes you feel taken care of and comfortable.

Bonus: "Your children are going to be some stallions, ain't they?" Hobie says, looking between you and Miguel. You laugh but Miguel glares at him with a scowl that would make most start running for the hills. "Stallions, eh?" you repeat later that night, in bed with him. While not a fan of you slowly assimilating to Hobie's humor, Miguel chuckles dryly and pulls you closer to him. "Indeed," he says, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

[alwayslurkinginthebackground]

Get in the Truck - A Pedrotober Drabble

Day Five of Pedrotober: Esquire Outtakes Pedrotober hosted by @norththelemon and @alyssamariag. View the full prompt list HERE and view my entire Pedrotober drabble catalog HERE.

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Rating: E because this is mostly just filth. With a hint of angst. I can't not write angst apparently. Unprotected p in v, oral, they fuck in a truck here, y'all. Honestly probably could have made it hornier but I had to go touch grass after writing it.

Word Count: 1324

a/n: WHEW It's been 8 million years since I last wrote smut but this Esquire outtake would not let me rest until Joel was written into it. This one is dedicated to the wives of Joel Miller. You know who you are. <3

"Get in the damn truck."

You cross your arms in refusal, standing your ground as Joel glares daggers at you, one arm slung over the side of the truck bed, the other braced against the open door. You can see the tension in his shoulders, you always can when you fight, but you're not about to give in. Not this time.

"Make me."

"For the love of god, why are you so fucking stubborn?" He walks back toward you, but you're practiced in the art of Joel Miller, and you don't move a muscle even when he's right in front of you. His broad frame towers over your much smaller one. "Get. In. The. Damn. Truck." he grits out again, teeth clenched.

He'd called you stubborn, but truthfully you'd learned from the best. "I'm not getting in that truck until you tell me what the fuck we're doing." His expression shifts to something unreadable, just for a moment, but you catch it, the way the pain flashes behind his eyes.

"LET'S GO!" Ellie interrupts as she plows into the garage with her backpack in tow, hopping in the front seat and shattering the tension between you and Joel. He holds his position for a moment and then you both resign to the excitement of the young girl left in your charge. Joel opens the back door so you can slide onto the bench seat. You ignore him as you slip in.

"Get in the damn truck."

His voice is as rough now as it was the first time, even when it sounds as a harsh whisper against your ear. Your gaze flickers to Ellie's sleeping form on the other side of the smoldering fire, and when you look back at where he'd been just a moment ago, you realize he's already halfway to the truck.

He's opened the door to the backseat by the time you catch up to him and you slip inside, the space becoming crowded the moment he joins you. "What the fuck are we doing, Joel" you ask him again once the door is closed, but he leaves you in an odd silence that feels suffocating.

"We're taking her to Tommy," he returns as though it's the simplest of tasks. As if crossing the country would be easy without the presence of infected and raiders and FEDRA in every major city across what used to be called a country. As if he has any idea of where his brother actually is.

"And you just expect me to be okay with this? With risking my life to go on this wild goose chase?" you inquire, your voice quickly rising in volume and intensity. "Joel, you know how often people talk about a cure. It never pans out. What if we do all of this, put our lives at risk, put her life at risk, only for it to be for nothing anyway?"

"We don't know that," he insists. "We owe it to Tess to..."

"Tess is dead, Joel."

Quiet hangs between you, and you wonder why you used to find solace in its intensity before the outbreak. Back when you'd sit in your car before work trying to compose yourself before going in.

"Tess would have wanted us to see this through," he grumbles, the same ache in his voice that you'd heard earlier.

"And she also wouldn't have wanted us to die trying."

You sit in silence again, and you can't tell if he's being stubborn or if he's actually contemplating your point.

"Tommy, then? Think this is the way to find him?" You wince at the sound of your own voice, aware of how much his brother's disappearance has hurt him. Made him feel so undeniably unworthy of any kind of love.

"Fuck no," is his response, followed by a low growl. His hands find your waist in a grip that makes you want to wince and pull away. But you can't. Not now. Not when you can already feel the heat pooling between your legs.

"Then what is it?" There's a sense of finality to your tone. An unspoken ultimatum stands as the only barrier left between you. He has to tell you or this is as far as you'll go. There will be no more getting in the truck. No more protecting the girl. No more of whatever the relationship you two share is. "Joel?" you ask again.

Instead of an answer, his lips are on yours as he shifts you back against the passenger side door. Your hands are collected in one of his calloused palms as he pins them above your head, the glass of the window cool against your skin. Your mind screams at you to stop him, to remind him that this isn't why you're here, but your body disagrees.

This is exactly why you're here.

It's already hot in the truck despite the chill in the air outside, and your mind flashes to your high school boyfriend and the shit job he'd done of getting you off in the back seat of a truck not unlike this one. You're thrust back to the reality of something much better as Joel works his way down your jaw, chapped lips against smooth skin. You struggle against his grip, a silent request for him to let your hands roam his body the way you want them to.

He refuses, instead guiding your hands to the headrests on either side of your shoulders. "Don't move them," he instructs, and you can do nothing but obey.

Your mind is fuzzy as you struggle to remember why you were angry with him in the first place. It's hard to recall when he's between your legs, dragging your jeans down your thighs. Impossible to remember when he's there, fingers pressed against your center, gathering the slick and pressing inside. A distant memory when he drops down to eat you out like it's what he needs to survive.

And maybe, you consider for a moment, it is.

His name falls from your lips again when you come, dulled by the sound of your heart beating in your ears. Your shoulders scream in pain from the awkward angle and the way the door handle presses into your back, but you can only focus on the way his tongue continues to circle your clit.

He laps at you until your hand falls from where he'd placed it to push him away from your overstimulated body. It's dark in the truck, but you can feel his eyes on you when you realize your mistake.

"I told you not to move."

Joel hauls you against him, your knees digging into the worn seat on either side of his hips as he forces your hands on the headrest behind him. "Keep them there." This time, you follow his order, even as he lifts you just enough to pull his cock from his jeans so you can sink down onto him, your body shuddering as he fills you.

"Please," you whisper, your head falling to his shoulder as his hands sit firm on your hips, preventing you from moving the way you want to. He holds you there, stretching you until you feel like you've forgotten everything. Forgotten why you were mad, what you were doing, where you were going.

Why you were going.

"I need you," he grunts out, one hand slipping between you to rest against your stomach. "I need you here." He presses his hand against you and your fingers dig into the headrest behind him, nails biting the fabric as you feel him filling you. "Do you feel that? Here."

And you do. you finally understand. It doesn't matter why or how or where or when. You'd do anything for him if it meant you got to feel this. He might be willing to risk his life for a lost cause, but you'd simply be willing to risk your life for his.

[marengogo]

Are You Sure?! - #1: A Vampire’s Utopia

Who by Jimin focused playlist 

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

–🐺–🐺–🐺–

Hello my JM & JK Loving Gurls, Bois and Enbys! 

How have we all been since Thursday? 😌 Who’s watched both episodes at least 3 times? 🤡 Who’s gonna keep watching the episodes until Thursday? 💜 Who’s been left marvelling, yet again, about how intricately beautiful human beings are 🙋🏾‍♀️…

Oh! Only me?! 👀.

... Well what can I say? If it weren’t for my undying love for movies I would have definitely chosen a job related to psychology. Now whether I would have turned out to be a help or a menace to society, is anyone’s guess, after all, there is no sense, or point, in speculating things that have no way of presently happening due to decisions made in the past. However, do y'all know what we can speculate on? The present based on actions that actually happened in the past.

I’ve admittedly rewatched both episodes of AYS for the fourth time yesterday for research purposes obviously, and what brings me here is that now very infamous moment there are presently ao3 books being written on this particular moment ? The one when my cutie-patootie twin-flame very concisely summarises his and JM’s “solo/chapter 2 relationship”, up to that point (which to be precise, is the period of time between 14 July 2022: Hobi’s Listening Party and 13 July 2023: AYS in USA… exactly 1 year: DAMN!) as per below:

First time I saw this part, the first thing I did was snort and then I immediately thought: DRAMA QUEEN and trust me, I would know. Oh, and let it be clear, I can only attempt to speculate on my twin-flame, especially in cases like this when I strongly feel that my boi has been … misunderstood. If it weren’t clear enough from the title, this is indeed a JK post you know JM-blood thirsting vampire etc etc etc.

Let's start with the fact that I beleive that JM was simply trying to start a simple bit of banter when he said:

And I would sincerely like to apologise to JM cause, indeed, this simple type of banter would have warranted a just as simple type of reply. Something like what JK eventually ended up saying after he allowed his thoughts to come forth and take the stage, but we will address this in a second:

But no.

You see, homeboi over here seems to be the type to hold on to things and will not let go until he’s cleared things, or situations, in the way he has known and/or perceived them to have happened, which tend to happen a lot when you are a very emotional person, who isn’t necessarily as eloquent. The most important thing to understand here, however, is the fact that whatever topic such people decide to discuss is all according to their most sensible account of facts and perceptions. They don't mean to offend or distort truths, they just ... emote for lack of better words. For example, it is a fact that, during that period, JK & JM were both busy, it is apparently also a fact that JK didn’t call, but according to JM it is not a fact that he himself didn’t call. 

Does that make JK a liar? In my opinion, not only can't I know what actually happened, but in fact, that is absolutely not the point of the case at hand. The way I see it, this is simply how JK has perceived this particular absence in his life, during that particular period. In fact, let’s dive even deeper.

Because of those two sentences, you’d I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT MANY DO ... think that JM and JK actually never met each other during that particular period of time 14 July 2022 - 13 July 2023. Now, I am sure we all remember him sorta/kinda pining on weverse during the period from 3 February 2023 and 14 March 2023, right?:

But let’s quickly look at a timeline of the 14 July 2022: Hobi’s Listening Party and 13 July 2023: AYS in USA period. Below are dates when they definitely met, with other members, that we are aware of. I’ve also inserted his most relevant weverse pinings, and the period of time they were busy at the same time, just for me to have a time reference:

・14 JULY 2022: J-HOPE’S LISTENING PARTY - OT6 (Yoongi was sick)

・1 SEPTEMBER 2022: JUNGKOOK BIRTHDAY - JM waint with Hobi to celebrate his birthday

・15 OCTOBER 2022 - BUSAN CONCERT - OT7

・12 DECEMBER 2022 - JIN’S ENLISTMENT SEND-OFF - OT7 

・most likely FEBRUARY-MARCH 2023 - LIKE CRAZY DANCE PRACTICE - JK went to see JM practice

 3 Feb 2023 - 14 Mar 2023 ——— LIGHT WEVERSE PINING - The above collage period

・25 MARCH 2023 - MEMBERS MEET WITH JIN DURING HIS HOLIDAY - OT7

27 March 2023 ——— HEAVY WEVERSE PINING - JK posting “I miss you”, then watching Suchita and reacting to JM content.

・18 APRIL 2023 - HOBI’S ENLISTMENT SEND-OFF - OT7

April - May ——— both JK & JM are travelling around the world for work and/or pleasure.

・25 JUNE 2023 - D-DAY in SEOUL ‘DAY 2’ - VMINKOOK at Yoongi’s concert 

・13 JULY 2023 - AYS in NYC - JK & JM (and staff) have dinner at ANTOYA 

… If you asked me, it would appear that JK’s issue is actually the fact that they didn’t get a chance to go out alone, just the two of them. Yeah … My twin-flame seems to always have had strong, almost impulsive, reactions when it comes to anything concerning JM, it is actually probably the most vocal he becomes for a non-talkative guy that is.

Can you recall any other member, other than JM, he was ever upset about because he didn’t get to hear their music? Can you think about any other member other than JM, who JK would most likely be spending time rehearsing, eating, doing nothing during band activities? Can you think of any other member other than JM, for whom he’s made a bit more of an effort during birthdays and special dates? Once again ... If you ask me ... JK truly values his time alone with JM, which is why I think his perception felt so fatalistic/dramatic we all know that for example, JM did go to the Golden Listening Party in October ... 

And don’t get me wrong, I definitely don’t believe it to be a one-way affair. Are You Sure?! exist exactly because JM would seem to also appreciate his alone time with JK, be it in front of a camera, in a hotel room, or whreever. After all, they were supposed to only go for one trip, but not only did they magically whip out time to go on two more Jeju and Sapporo, but they are now talking about doing this until they are 50. LOL I’ll be in my 60s but I’ll tune in! . And then, to top it all off … They ended up enlisting together. The way JM wanted to “make a video of their adventures and freedom” before enlistment, you’d think they’d be apart for the following 18 months because of said enlistment 😒.  

It’s actually quite funny if you think about it. Between the two of them JM is most definitely the shiest, but JM is most definitely the better one at expressing himself. Y’all can obviously disagree with me, but from where I stand, my twin-flame is actually smart as hell one day people will finally acknowledge that, but he is not the best with words. I’m sure in JK’s Utopia, the world is a place where people sing to each other in order to communicate, instead of spoken words. Alas, this is not JM-blood thirsting Vampire Utopia, and in the world where we presently live, JK seems to be the type who’s first reaction to stressful situations is finding the funny side of things and when that fails then he needs to do something about it; anything.

Now, as always, everyone is entitled to their opinions, in fact, many have made it very clear that to them JK was feeling “off” in these episodes, but to me, not only he was being his typical weird self, but I also I discovered a few new aspects, for example, when he truly cares about something, his devotion has really no limits. But let me use some images, and some words, to better explain how I perceived JK in these two episodes. Remember how JK once substituted the word Love with Jimin, in a Boy with Luv lyric Jimin nothing stronger? Well I’d like to do the same thing and sub the word Love with JK in the following very famous biblical paragraph and associate specific moments in both episodes to each line:

JK is patient, 

If this is not the testament sequence of a man who’s been waiting to spend time with you, no matter what, then I don’t know what else is.

JK is kind.

He does not envy, he does not boast, he is not proud.  

He does not dishonor others, he is not self-seeking, 

LOL … one day JK will be able to pull a prank on JM; I believe in you.

He is not easily angered, he keeps no record of wrongs.

I shouldn’t have to say this, but ... there are no “wrongs” done between JM & JK, what they do with each other is joke, have accidents and play around - but gotta say this just in case!

Last but not least, though JK was coughing like there was no tomorrow, wouldn’t you think that JM being vehemently sick, would be grounds for the whole show to be cancelled? In fact, we didn’t even know there was going to be a show, so nobody would have missed anything and at some point they could have used the footage in a bangtan-bomb, or during Festa, or something. … The fact that they were willing to keep going and even show us themselves in such a vulnerable state, the fact that because of it JM was so worried and doubting almost everything, and the fact that JK ultimately wasn’t worried and regretted nothing, kinda reinforced for me just how much they truly wanted to be together on that trip at that time it was basically overdue. 

In conclusion, though my Twin-flame’s strongest suit isn’t communication, and his recollection of events may or may not be as accurate due to emotional perception, his heart is ALWAYS in the right place, sturdy, confident and ready to let JK be the best he can be, at all times. I mean, you don’t have to take my word for anything I've just said but below is JK a mere 10 days after they separated from NYC/Connecticut ... look at him ... giddy AF and hella playful if you ask me and once again … weverse pining.

I guess one alone trip wasn’t enough after all 😉.

Always respectfully yours 🫰🏾💜,

Marengo.

[adambja]

Basically I am gonna be direct I am always direct in everything

basically I am gonna do the silva method 2 yes I entered the void state before it was somehow by the help of myself (my subconscious mind) and @rosellesworkshop she really helped me a lot

And..... the first void state story is here

I didn't post anything about what I manifested but basically I typed everything on my google notes and I put an affirmation "I have everything on my void list" and I affirmed in my void state it was pretty easy but such a vivid experience it's so special so peaceful to me but at the same time it was just normal because that peaceful vibe I have been always feeling it my whole life because of my self-concept

what I manifested I can literally say everything but it's almost a lot of things it would take me 2 hours to say it all but gonna make it simple because someone messaged me here asking if it's life-altering?

Yes entering the void state and manifesting in general is life-altering but it isn't that special like it's normal you have been manifesting everything your whole life based on your thoughts your imagination and your feelings also I felt that I am worthy of entering it and manifesting thru it because i just want it and why wouldn't I be worthy of it? No damn reason so yeah I deserve all my manifestations and I deserve to feel good about myself my worth is literally the whole universe with all the people and everything in it

Let me make it so clear

I am gonna do something like getting the limiting beliefs I saw here + the ones I didn't have out and flip it

Basically

Astrology-planets-saturn-saturn in retrograde-mercury-mercury in retrograde doesn't stop me from entering my void state / Astrology-planets-saturn-saturn in retrograde-mercury-mercury in retrograde doesn't stop me from waking up in my void state / Astrology-planets-saturn-saturn in retrograde-mercury-mercury in retrograde can't stop me IT CAN'T

religions doesn't stop me from entering my void state/ religions doesn't stop me from waking up in my void state / religions can't stop me (in fact everything about LOA in every damn religion but people can't simplify every word to understand it fully in every book of the three religions I read QURAN I read THE BIBLE I even read THE TORAH) - I am not religious at all HEY DEAR MUSLIMS Law Of Assumptions isn't haram and Law Of Assumptions isn't shirk at all it's about changing yourselves which is the self which is halal in Islam as their god says it all in here so Dear Muslims wake up and realize your own religion and understand (not just read) your own book I am not even Muslim and I know more than y'all HOW DARE YOU PUT YOUR FELLOW MUSLIMS IN THE DARK when it's actually all there in YOUR QURAN anyways NOW Hey Dear Christians lets get to the bible it's all in here and FINALLY Hey Dear Jewish People almost every part of the torah is full of self-concept Jewish people will understand what I mean and the answer about LOA is here

the void state is real it's me not the void state isn't a place outside of me

Everything/everyone outside of me isn't real everything/everyone is defined by me

My subconscious mind is always helping me and loving me

Nothing from my new self-concept can be deleted damaged destroyed erased or removed or even gone because i did anything wrong when actually nothing is wrong or right it can't be deleted damaged destroyed erased or removed or even gone

Everything lasts forever btw but you don't have to attach to it or control it just let it be what you want

Time isn't real every process is instant in every reality such as entering the void is already instant for me

Just let every thought go you don't have to even do anything to it or flip it just let it be breathe then after a while think ABOUT the reason you have that thought

I am in control of what version I am and of who I am and of what I want to experience and of how I want to experience it!

Assume success as it happened period

I am ALREADY CALM AND COMFORTABLE I JUST live and trust my own subconscious because I know it's just giving me what I want why? I already reprogrammed it to do it I already know it listens to me I already know it loves me too I already know it is me WHO DECIDES ALL THIS! MY SUBCONSCIOUS MIND IS A PART OF ME NOT ANOTHER PART of something that's away from me

Everything i want is meant for me why would i even think about it In the first place?? Because it's already mine

LET IT GO it's easier

I assume that i already got it

i assume that my void state is already mine I can do what I want with it THE VOID IS MINE ITS ME I AM MINE EVERYTHING I WANT IS MINE EVERYONE I WANT IS MINE NO ONE CAN STOP ME

Nothing is actually hard it's MY choice to CHOOSE MY OWN DESTINY AND I CHOSE THAT EVERYTHING IS EASY

The void state isn't hard the void state is easy

The void state isn't your imagination at all it's just you with a deeper sense of self aka it's a deep mediative state

My subconscious mind always accepts everything I want instantly

my subconscious is always listening until i die and my subconscious always makes everything I think of and say or affirm as true

My subconscious mind doesn't have an opinion of me

My subconscious mind is just like a bitch who gives me what I want instantly no matter what and my subconscious mind is so smart my subconscious mind always has a way of making things happen magically period

My conscious mind is full of my good affirmations and my perfect self-concept and just like a bitch AS MY SUBCONSCIOUS MIND

My feelings are stable and I feel safe everywhere with everyone and within myself

The void state is for everyone not for a specific amount of people or like a chosen people it's for everyone

The void state is life-altering

I am the god of my reality forever

I don't have to control anything outside of me i am in control of myself and that's enough because it's all me nothing exists outside of me

Delusional?? I call it imaginative and the imagination is the core of the reality I always love living in my imagination

I am not gaslighting myself - I am not even lying to myself I feel like I am saying the truth to myself because my subconscious always accepts everything I say and think about as true I don't even have to worry about anything!

spirituality doesn't matter calmness and breathing and focusing on nothing and the self matters more than anything

The old story is old let it go the new story is actually who i am so I would call it my current story

My chakras are already aligned and open my chakras can't be blocked or closed

I am already aligned and ready for everything I want

I am already what I want to be instantly

I am love my heart chakra is open I feel love

My desired reality is already mine

I always claim everything as mine because it is mine and my subconscious mind always makes it as true and I am fearless and I know so well I already have it inside of me in my imagination and outside too aka (everything I want is already mine)

There isn't anything such as blockages lmfao bruh I already don't have blockages period

Law of assumptions is assuming that the thing i want is already here with me and I already got it also assuming i already have that perfect self-concept i already have everything I want I already entered my void state instantly easily and effortlessly the same thing with everything you already have your sp or whatever you want

I just focus on controlling what is inside of me and as a result the outside already changed as my thoughts changed and my feelings changed

I can and I always enter my void state/wake up in my void state in any room in any house in any place and at anytime even if it's after midnight I am always able to do what I want because I want to do it

My body is already ready to wake up in my void state / My body is already ready to enter my void state - My mind is already ready to wake up in my void state / My mind is already ready to enter my void state

I don't give anyone my energy or my power and my energy is mine and my power is mine and no one can take my power/my energy from me finally I can't give anyone my energy or my power

I can't give anyone my own self-concept because they don't deserve it it's mine and I deserve it more than anyone because I worked for it I affirmed for it I listened to tapes for it so it's mine no body deserves it even if I love them they don't deserve my self-concept

I always focus on myself and helping myself only I don't have to help others at all helping others isn't my purpose in life forever in every reality helping others isn't good if it takes my time away

Everytime I talk about any manifestation of mine that it already happened to anyone it already happened and it was instant no matter what and telling anyone my manifestations can't stop my manifestations from happening because it already happened and because that's what I want period and my manifestations can't be damaged and my manifestation can't be destroyed and my manifestations are already protected by me and my smart subconscious mind

To understand #46 better WATCH THIS

What is the lesson from #46? Don't be like Cher when she let Tai have her moment and that made cher feel unwanted and unpopular LISTEN STAND UP GIRLS AND GUYS REMEMBER WHO TF ARE YOU YOU MADE THIS THING/PERSON/WHATEVER THAT BIG YOU CAN MAKE THING/PERSON/WHATEVER NOTHING AGAIN IT'S A CHOICE! DON'T EVEN PUT YOURSELF IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS NO ONE DESERVES WHAT YOU HAVE BUT YOU PERIOD YES HELP THEM YES GUIDE THEM BUT NEVER LET IT BE ON YOU! cause they are nothing but assumptions in your subconscious mind period!

I guess I said everything but another question think with me

If you can memorize that memory from your far past how can't you enter your void?? Ofc you can

Assume that you entered it everytime you slept all those years since you were born but you were just unaware now you are aware of it period and wake up there I tried it many times after manifesting my void list it's simple, easy also i understand and realize that my subconscious mind is always listening until i die and my subconscious always makes everything I think of and say or affirm as true and basically use the breathing that @gorgeouslypink put as a technique which is Wim Hof technique it's A M A Z I N G

So I am gonna try the silva method because I made another void list to manifest it thru my void state again but I just wanna try another way to enter and I always wake up in my void state everyday btw because it was written in my first void list it's all for fun now nothing else

Read "my void doc" by @rosellesworkshop

Read this and this by @gorgeouslypink

It might seem so simple and that's seriously it

That's the void state it's simple as hell but some people here and on Twitter just complicate it because of their own feelings and this brings us back to 1.how you breathe daily and 2.your self-concept add to those two things 3.emotional intelligence which is basically choosing your own feelings period!

Have fun with the silva method I bet it already works because everything always works for me instantly!

I know thanked u a lot but thank you again Rosie and everyone @rosellesworkshop @gorgeouslypink @littlemissprettyprincess @angelria111 @voidbaby111 y'all are amazing seriously everything y'all posted helped me in my journey generally

also seeing success stories from @voidsuccess @voidsuccessarchive was very helpful to me I defined all the points ABOUT what did those people who entered or woke up in the void state have and I started defining it as me and as WHO I AM NOW! And I Just Said "That's Me Now" and that's was a change of state inside of me you can check law of states too ;)

Happy pride month to the LGBTQ+ - Y'all are loved

And y'all have a great day/night depends on y'all's time zones GOODBYE!!

Update: I already entered using it too it was too easy I entered while doing it 😭😭

Also like I already wake up in my void state everytime I nap/sleep so basically it was too simple and easy for me

[overnowsfcb]

even if they talk; trent alexander-arnold smau

pairing: trent alexander-arnold x nepobaby knowles!model!reader

face claim: taylor russell

summary: people will criticize everything, but there is someone who will never fail you, and that was trent.

warnings: mostly fluff, angst (bit of hate and critics towards reader).

note: this is my first smau i hope it's not too bad! i would love to hear your thoughts or suggestions, also requests are open! — venus 🫂💐🫧

INSTAGRAM!

liked by ynknowles, virgilvandijk and 1,199,023 others

trentarnold66 🤷🏽‍♂️

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user1 the best out there

user2 unreal 🔥🔥🔥

user3 let's go reds!

ynknowles congrats! is there some secret routine helping you before the game to be that amazing? 🤔

↪trentarnold66 Maybe.. But I can't share any details here 🤫

↪user4 ARE WE MISSING SOMETHING????

↪user5 whats so interesting??? share with the class????

user6 yn and trent interacting??? i- wow

↪user7 if i hadnt seen it with my own eyes id say everyones tripping

user8 are they implying something or is just me

↪user9 I THOUGHT EXACTLY THE SAME

user10 YOU BETTER EXPLAIN YOURSELF ynknowles

user11 LET HER COOK

↪user12 girl i think they've already had a feast

user13 wtf is yn doing here

↪user14 she ruins everything good

user15 i hope trent doesnt distract w this... cant even say it

↪user16 yeah we know what she did to her exes so...

↪user17 put some respect on beyoncé's daughter's name and inform yourself before talking, mind you

NEWS!

comments

user trent can do so much better than yn. she just wants to stay relevant

user shes using trent because she has no talents to show

user i've heard rumors about how yn's exes have ended. trent, watch your back, my man.

↪user you talk as if she murdered them??? plus she never did anything to any of her exes you're just talking bc it's free

user i just hope that trent can open his eyes asap

user what a disappointment from trent. i thought he was better than dating a spoiled kid with too much time and money in her hands

user y'all are just jealous that she has what many desire 1. money 2. fame 3. beauty 4. trent's dick

user why is everyone jumping to conclusions though? we should give them the space to tell us whenever they feel ready

user i love how haters act like they know everything about yn's life and they dont know shit

TWITTER!

INSTAGRAM!

liked by zoeisabellakravitz, trentarnold66 and 2,763,548 others

ynknowles paris you are the vibes ⭐️ so damn proud of my little blue and this mind-blowing tour, i love you momma beyonce !

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beyonce Love you endlessly, my angel. You know how much your support means to Blue. 💙

bellahadid Prettiest fairy in the world.

troyesivan mmm alright??? why are you so perfect???

user18 no trent here though 🤷‍♀️

user19 this is the confirmation about how yn just uses trent

user20 ugh. i hate these nepobabies who think the world revolves around them

ynknowles has restricted the comments for this post

TWITTER!

INSTAGRAM!

liked by ynfan34, trentfan78 and 18,905 others

ynknowlesupdates Yn Knowles in Anfield today with friends! This is the first time we've seen her in public in three months.

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user1 i cant stand her 😒 smile or smth if youre gonna see your "boyfriend"

↪ ynfan1 if you cant stand her then poke your eyes with a spoon and dont bother 😁

ynfan2 omg this will be the first match that she attends. i hope she enjoys it!!!! (win please)

ynfan3 I MISSED HER SO MUCH IM GLAD SHES WELL

ynfan4 baby looks tired of people taking pics of her 😕 i wanna hug her

↪user2 but shes there for that??? she loves attention

↪ynfan5 or maybe just MAYBE she wants to support her boyfriend??

ynfan6 TODAY I WAS MISSING HER MORE THAN ANYTHING SHE LOVES ME

trentfan1 WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING THERE?? i though we had gotten rid of her 😩

user4 if we lose today you know who is to blame...

trenfan2 over and over again i will repeat it until trent leaves her, shes with him for fame

↪ynfan7 yeah cause trent is soooo worried about what you think right???

user5 i bet shes there just for the cameras

trentfan3 yn trying to be a wag is so cute and laughable. she doesnt even measure up to the real ones.

↪user6 ikr? shes trying so hard poor girl

trentfan4 the fact that she goes with her friends 💀💀 i bet no wag would want to be seen with her

INSTAGRAM!

trentarnold66 Just clever people can handle how flawless my queen is. Happy first anniversary, my love. I love you madly, always. No need to demonstrate anything on social media when we're tellin' each other how much we love at every hour. ❤️

tagged: ynknowles

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ynknowles i love love love you so fucking much you dont have an idea

↪trentarnold66 i love you more more more than you could imagine

ynknowles thank you for being the most perfect man ive ever known t ❤️❤️❤️❤️

↪trentarnold66 i just try my best to be on your level, lovely

beyonce You are such a gentleman, Trent! Grateful for the way you take care of my angel.

liked by trentarnold66, ynknowles and 21,234 others

ynfan8 A YEAR??? BUT IF WE FOUND OUT FOUR MONTHS AGO

↪trentfan5 i feel so stupid how did they hide it so well 😦😦

trentfan6 shut them up trent

trentfan7 THATS A GOOD MAN!!!! men just take notes rn

bellahadid Thank you for taking care of the purest woman in this world, Trent 💖

ynfan9 not bee and bella thanking him 🥺🥺

↪trentfan8 im gonna cry he must be so cute

↪ynfan10 no bc she surely spent some tough months with the hate towards her and he sure was the supportive boyfriend as he should 😭😭

trentfan9 WHY NO ONES TALKING ABOUT THE BATMAN KEYCHAINS???

↪ynfan11 nonononooooo i love them best couple in the world

ynfan12 the pics he takes of her, the caption, everything 😪😪😪 god send me a man like that

trentfan10 the people who said they were going too fast must be regretting it 🤭

ynfan13 im afraid we'll find out they have kids when they're in uni, lmao. happy anniversary you two!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[bonezone44]

Pretty Is As Pretty Does (18+)

Uncle!Ezra x F!Reader x Uncle!Tommy

Summary: The best part about Uncle!Ezra and Uncle!Tommy is that they always smile when you walk in.

Word Count: 2883

tags: spitroast, double creampie, praise kink, southern accents, being called 'pretty', two men talking about you as if you aren't there. nicknames for Reader: angel, niece, baby, honey, sugar.

------------

It's late at night and you can't sleep. Been tossing and turning for what feels like hours. You finally decide to get out of bed and do something, anything, rather than lie there counting endless sheep.

You make your way to the kitchen with sleepy bare footsteps. You hear murmuring out the back door--deep, smooth voices and soft laughter. You figure Ezra has a friend over. You bite your lip. You want Ezra to yourself for some quality time. Maybe if you let him know you're up, he'll send his friend home. It's worth a shot anyway. You've got nothing better to do.

When you step out onto the screened in back porch, you see Ezra reclining in one chair and his friend in the other. Theyre silhouetted by the blue light of a bug zapper hanging in the corner. It's been a hot summer, but tonight the air is cooler and drier than it has been in weeks. The wood floors creak as you step further onto the porch and both men go quiet and turn to you.

"Hey, angel," says Ezra with a wry smile on his face. "What're you doin up this late?"

"Can't sleep," you answer with a shrug.

"Aww, you poor thing." He holds his hand out towards you. "Me and Uncle Tommy are out here shootin the shit. Why don't you come sit with us for a while?"

That's when your whole body goes hot. You look over and realize it wasn't just any of Ezra’s friends. It was Tommy. And Tommy’s got a nice little smile on his face, too, as his eyes rake over you in your pajamas and bare feet.

" Damn, girl," says Tommy. "You get prettier and prettier every time I see you."

Your cheeks burn and you fidget. "I don't know about that--"

"Shit, I do. I bet you gotta beat them boys off you with a stick."

You wave him off. "No way."

"Aww, look at her bein shy," says Ezra, turning further toward you in his chair. "There is no need to be so timid around your uncles, angel."

"That's right, honey," says Tommy. "It's just us. You don't gotta worry bout nothin around us." He smiles. "We'll keep you safe from all them boys out there. We'll have 'em runnin off. Don't you worry about that."

You roll your eyes with a smile.

"What? You don't believe us?" asks Ezra with big, puppy dog lookin' eyes.

You shake your head. "Y'all are just sayin stuff."

"Oh, c'mere, honey," says Tommy as he reaches out and grabs your hand. "Why don't you come sit by Uncle Tommy and let him show you how pretty he thinks you are?"

Tommy's one of the most handsomest men you've ever seen in your entire life. He's got beautiful wavy hair that curls beneath his ears. His voice is so smooth and syrupy compared to Ezra's deep rasp. He's always wearing nice blue jeans and cleaned-up cowboy boots. Ezra almost never tries to dress nice to the point where you've given up on ever looking nice, too. And right now, you're standing in your sleep clothes and Tommy's offering you something that you weren't even trying for.

Your heart races in your chest and you gush between your legs. Your face is on fire--the whole situation makes you so nervous. What if they're lying? What if they're just playing tricks on you? What if this is all one big joke? Your history with Ezra didn't matter. He could change his mind at any minute and go running off leaving you all alone. You were tired of being abandoned by the people you trusted most.

Ezra rests his large hand on your hip. You can feel the heat of him through the thin fabric of your shorts. "Go on, angel. Uncle Tommy ain't gonna hurt you none." You glance at Ezra nervously and he nods. "Go on," he says again.

You decide to give in. Ezra's been around long enough. He knows you. He knows how anxious you get. And if he's there, it does feel safer. You've at least got one person on your side if Tommy doesn't treat you right.

You take two steps towards Tommy and the two men immediately relax. Tommy spreads his legs and guides you by your hips to sit between them. He pulls you back against his warm, broad chest. He feels so solid and sturdy behind you. And he smells like something clean and bright--waking you up even more, making you more aware of just how much of his body is touching yours. His hands slide up and down your bare shoulders.

"Now what's makin you think you're not the prettiest thing on two legs, sugar?" says Tommy.

"I-I don't know," you answer. You did know, though. It was all the movies and TV and magazines. All the clothing stores and boutiques where the clothes never quite fit you right. It felt like the whole world was telling you that you weren't pretty enough to be loved.

"Too much TV," says Ezra and you roll your eyes.

Tommy chuckles into your skin as he presses light kisses into your shoulder. Each one excites you and soothes you at the same time. "You know all that stuff is fake, don'tchu?" His hands slide down your arms, squeezing you just above your elbows. "You can't be thinkin ya ain't pretty just 'cause ya ain't fake, now, sugar. 'S not what men like anyway."

"Not any man worth a damn," adds Ezra.

"That's right," says Tommy. His hands move from your arms to your waist. "Men know a real thing when they see it, sugar." His hands slide up to your breasts and he gropes them in each hand. "And we got ourselves a real one right here."

Your hands grasp tight onto Tommy's knees next to your own. You glance over at Ezra with hazy eyes and Ezra sits so casually as if nothing unconventional is going on.

"'S about what's on the inside," says Ezra, flicking dirt off his ankle as he goes to cross his legs. "That's what counts."

"That's right," says Tommy. He squeezes your nipples through your shirt. "And I'm proud to say that our little niece here is pretty on the inside and out."

"She sure is, ain't she?" says Ezra.

You don't know how to respond. You're not sure what to do. All you know is that there's a pool of slickness growing between your legs and it's enough that you wonder if you're gonna leave a wet spot on the chair beneath you.

"What? You still don't believe us?" says Tommy.

"She can be real stubborn when she wants to be," says Ezra.

Tommy chuckles. "How 'bout this? Don't you feel this, sugar?" One of Tommy's hands slides down the front of you to cup you between your legs. He pulls you flush against him and that's when you feel it. That's when you feel how hard he is. You're not sure how you missed it before. It feels like a steel rod against your back. "You feelin' what you do to your Uncle Tommy, baby?" He rolls his hips against you. "'M about to burst and we ain't even done nothin, yet. We're just sittin here talkin."

Part of you wants to laugh at that. There's a hell of a lot more going on than just talking.

"I think she's grown weary of conversation, brother," says Ezra.

Tommy chuckles again. "Ya think?"

"Yeeeeep," Ezra groans and stands from his chair. "And you did promise to show her how pretty she was."

"I sure did, didn't I?"

Ezra walks over and stands in front of you. You feel surrounded--caged in. But not unsafe. "Whatchu thinkin', angel?" Ezra cradles your face in his big hands. He leans close enough to you that the whole rest of the back porch disappears. "Want me to get you ready for Uncle Tommy?"

Oh fuck. Does Ezra mean what you think he means? "O-Okay," you say.

"Good girl." He grins briefly before his eyes go wide and serious again. "Uncle Tommy's big. I don't want you gettin hurt."

You nod. "Okay."

Ezra sinks to his knees before you. He reaches for your waistband and you lift your hips as he tugs your shorts down and off your legs. "Mm-mmm," hums Ezra, staring between your thighs. "Our little niece is pretty everywhere." His large fingers poke and prod at your lips. "She's wet, too." He spreads your pussy apart with both hands. "Soakin," he says.

"Is she now?" Tommy says. His breathing's picked up. Both his hands back on your chest. You can feel his whole body rolling into you, even if just in the smallest way. Ezra's touch has you responding in kind.

Ezra's head tilts upward with his fingers still on you. "Remember that job on Breyer street? The house with all those cat paintings?"

Tommy stills a moment. "... y-yeah?"

"Remember how that faucet on the side of the house wouldn't stop leaking?"

"...yeah?"

"That's about what she looks like right now."

Tommy laughs and holds you close, grinding against you. "Fuck, man. You can't be sayin shit like that to me, man. What the hell?"

"I am merely trying to be honest with you," says Ezra with a shrug. He thrusts two thick fingers inside of you with one hand and with the other, he rests his thumb against your clit. Unmoving. Simply applying pressure as you and Tommy's bodies move together.

"Oh my god," you moan as Ezra's fingers stroke inside you and Tommy whispers in your ear.

"'S Uncle Ezra makin you feel good, sugar? 'S he touchin you just right?"

"Mm-hmm," you whimper. "So good. So good."

"You feel how pretty we think you are, honey?" asks Tommy.

"And it's not just because you're our favorite little niece," says Ezra.

"That's right," says Tommy. "'S because it's a fact, sugar." Tommy grunts. Ezra's fingers squelch inside your wet walls. "It's a fact that you're the prettiest goddamn thing we've ever seen."

"Our pretty little angel inside and out," Ezra says with a smirk as he adds a third finger inside you.

"Oh fuck" you moan and writhe.

Tommy chuckles. "Even if she got a dirty mouth on her."

Ezra laughs, too. "Oh she's filthy."

"Is that right?"

"I-I don't know." Your dizzy with desire. You're surprised you can register anything they're saying to you.

"How 'boutchu get that filthy mouth on Uncle Ezra's cock while Uncle Tommy gets inside this pussy, huh, sugar? How's that sound?"

"Yeah, okay," you slur.

Ezra pulls his fingers out of you and stands. Tommy scoots you forward so he can undo his jeans. He and Ezra situate you so that your feet are on the floor with your ass hovering above Tommy's lap. Your hands grip the arms of Tommy's chair. Ezra pulls his own cock out of his pants and it bobs in front of your face.

You and Tommy both hiss as he pierces your cunt. Ezra was right. Tommy is big.

"Shit, man. You didn't tell me it was like this--" Tommy chokes out through panting breaths.

You bite your lip and groan.

Ezra chuckles as he strokes himself. "I tried, brother, but some things are best experienced for yourself."

"You got that right," says Tommy. He moans and curses as he guides you up and down his shaft, providing you with the rhythm and speed.

Once you feel steady enough, you open your eyes and Ezra's cock is hard and ready for you. You open your mouth, eager to hold its weight on your tongue. He doesn't thrust or move--merely lets your rhythm on Tommy's lap provide all the back-and-forth action.

"You're doing perfect, angel," says Ezra as he caresses your cheek. You've given him much better blowjobs before but he's looking down at you like you're giving him the high of a lifetime. "You look so pretty."

"Prettiest fuckin thing we ever fucked," grunts out Tommy.

"Play with that clit and she'll cream all over ya," says Ezra.

"Goddamn," curses Tommy. And he does what Ezra says. He reaches one hand around and presses hard against your clit. Four fingers rubbing back and forth just above where his cock is thrusting in and out of you.

Syrupy warmth begins to flood between your legs and seconds later your spasming between the two men--thighs twitching and toes curling.

Tommy curses again. "If she wasn't my favorite niece before, she sure as shit would be now."

"Told ya," says Ezra.

Tommy continues to thrust into you as you bounce onto him. "Yeah, suck his cock. Suck Uncle Ezra's cock, sugar."

Ezra does his best to keep his cock inside your mouth, but he doesn't seem too concerned about your performance there. It seems to be enough to watch you getting fucked so hard by your Uncle Tommy. Hearing your thighs slap each other and his cock squelch inside you is like music to Ezra's ears and dick. And your whimpers--goddamn!--you got the prettiest little whimpers he's ever heard in his life. Add in Tommy's desperate grunts and Ezra's careening toward the edge and nearly sent over it. He has to take a step back to get control of himself.

Without Ezra's cock to muffle you, your whimpers turn into shouts and Tommy grits his teeth. "Where do I cum?" asks Tommy through strained breaths.

"Fill her up, brother." Ezra's eyes sparkle at you. "Then I'll take my turn inside our pretty little pussy."

Tommy curses some more. He wraps his arms around you and taps on your clit, hoping to make you come along with him. And you do, it's hard not to. His thrusts were hitting all the right spots in your inner walls and Ezra's standing in front of you and watching you with tender focus. Your legs twitch and your toes curl all over again.

"Alright, now, hold it all in, angel," says Ezra with a stern expression on his face and you know what he means. You reach between your legs as Tommy pulls out and you do your best to keep all his cum inside you.

Ezra sits and then lies down on the floor, his cock hard and at attention. He waves you over with the flick of his fingers. "Come ride your Uncle Ezra, baby. Come show me how it's done," he says.

And something animalistic has been triggered inside of you as Ezra casually reclines on the hard wood floor. His elbows are bent and his head rests in both hands. He dons a simple smile and it almost drives you crazy. You want him as desperate for you as you are for him. You want him aching and writhing for your touch. He's been too relaxed this whole time and you almost hate him for it.

Tommy's cum is beginning to seep from between your fingers so you hustle to sit on Ezra's cock. Ezra's facial expression doesn't change as you sink onto him--but you notice the way his hips curl ever so slightly into you. He's holding back and you wanna make him give in. But you know Ezra, just as much as he knows you. And riding him how he likes it isn't going to get you anywhere. He wants you to use him--make yourself come by whatever means necessary. And that is certainly something you can oblige by.

So you do. Your hands grip his chest and you find the right angle that allows you to roll your hips into him with your clit pressed against his skin. You decide to take. You take and take and take your pleasure from him--you don't give a shit what makes him feel good. This one's all about you. And eventually he does give in. You see the way he grits his teeth and bites his lip. His hands fly to your waist, but you don't let him guide you at all. This is your ride and your orgasm. Even if you've already had two and Ezra's yet to have one.

But it was just what Ezra wanted--he was getting off on you getting off and some kind of feedback loop developed into both of you getting off and your panting and he's snarling and then suddenly there's another burst of hot liquid inside of you and seeping out of you. And you don't know it, yet, but Ezra loves when all the juices and cum are soaking his lap and he's filthy with the remnants of a well-and-good fucking. And if he could suck his own dick after all of it, he would. But instead, he pulls you up his body and has you sit on his face and he gives your pussy the most tender and loving kiss with tongue and all. All while your trembling and dizzy from overstimulation.

Once you finally take a moment to breathe. You find Tommy watching with lazy, tired eyes from his chair, his own cock already tucked back in. But there's a smirk on his face that tells you he appreciated the show you and Ezra just gave him.

"Alright, angel," says Ezra with a messy mouth. "Let's go put you back to bed."

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a/n: wow. so horny. jesus christ.

tagging: @neverwheremoonchild @xdaddysprincessxx 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

[bluespiritshonour]

Oh my God!

I just caught up with World's Finest: Teen Titans and I absolutely have to write this out:

First of all, I love this cover:

The thing that caught my eye: “you're grounded.”

Not the dramatic “you're fired” as if the motherfucker didn't raise that damn kid in his own damn house for YEARS.

(I know. I know. Bar on the ground, but what would you?)

Also, the anger palpable on Bruce's face and Dick's absolute disregard for it. I'm laughing here y'all. This is what teenagers act like. This is what fights between parents and children look like.

Also. Dick Grayson, I've been missing. You're back from war!

I love how curt he is. The “Get lost” hits in all the right places. We love a strongly-principled character that stands for what he believes in. With all the lukewarm Dick Grayson writing floating around I felt like walking into a coffee shop while it's snowing outside.

More of this writing, please.

I'd been waiting for this moment all through this series.

This conversation.

I compare things all the time. It might not be the right thing in every field but I think it serves well when it comes to comic books. We all have personal “canon criteria”—for example, mine are “Darwyn Cooke wrote this Bruce so I'm taking it as valid characterisation ” or “Every version of Bruce played by Kevin Conroy is valid”. (Minus Bruce Timm bullshit!)

Which was what cinched my hatred for Bruce after reading a Robin short story that Cooke wrote and alluded to Robin: Year One in it. I mean, I might not fuck with Dixon, but am I going to call even Cooke's Bruce OOC? No. It means Bruce is a jerk. Full stop.

Waid is one of the writers I respect (excluding Kingdom Come. I hate it and I can't put my finger on the why. But I just do: I hate it. I hate it for Clark. I hate it for Diana. And I'm a professional Bruce-hater so let's not even go there. I hate it for Dick too.)

And Dick and Bruce's relationship has a lot of baggage from the fact that a) Bruce is himself traumatised and fails to meet Dick's emotional needs b) he wasn't ready to be a father when he adopted Dick c) Dick simply suffers from being the eldest—the test child.

And very rarely have I seen writers manage to walk on the thin line of complicated-but-dedicated-and-strong.

Young Justice cartoon did it. Dick and Bruce's relationship is going strong. But they fight and have different values. And Dick can see all that is wrong with Bruce's approach to vigilantism in particular and life in general.

Grimm (Legends of the Dark Knight #149-154) did it right. Where Bruce hurt Dick deeply and made him feel unwanted all the while overthinking about Dick's well-being. Way to go, buddy! You can see the repercussions it has for Dick while simultaneously stare at this man who's tying himself into knots trying to think how best to parent.

I think that's what most Bruce and Dick comics miss: the excessive worrying. They don't show the worry, make them fight for drama, never address it apart from throwing out a “it's because Bruce's worried” (bitch, where?) and have Dick running back to Gotham at the first chance. It sounds an awful lot like “your parents hurt you 'cause they love you” bullshit.

I think World's Finest manages it well because foremost, Bruce says, in words, that he's worried about Dick's well-being. He's taciturn, he's putting constant pressure on Dick all in the hopes of making him quit Titans. All this makes him a jerk. But I don't hate him for it.

It's between Dick's “you don't trust me” and Bruce's “no, I don't trust them.”

Most teenagers clash with their parents. It's normal. That's what Waid has shown here and I love it. It feels very—normal?

Especially when the Bats aren't normal! Bruce sure as fuck ain't a normal parent. But there was something very bitter-sweet coming-of-age in this conversation.

Bruce does all those things that are bad for Dick and his growing independence. You're not supposed to handle teenagers like that.

He's worried and taking desperate measures. “If I punish him, then maybe he'll obey me and quit Titans and then he'll he safe”—lots of parents who don't know how to deal with teenagers do it.

But the sequence of it: Bruce is worried → Bruce wants Dick to quit Titans → for Dick it means proving himself to be better, to not get hurt (as if he can control that beyond a certain point) → Bruce being alarmed at Dick's insistence to stay with the Titans and taking desperate measures like benching him.

At least it makes sense.

Compare it to Dixon's Nightwing origin story, which honestly, personally I think was lazy writing. Drama for drama's sake. “You’re fired because you're spending too much time with the Titans.” The same writer also had Bruce say that he did it because he wanted Dick to strike out on his own. Blah, blah, blah.

And no matter whatever happens he'd never ever say it to Dick's face that he's worried about him because—well, reasons.

Robin: Year One logic:

I'm worried about Dick's health so I fire him. He runs off and can get hurt? He joins a school for assasins? None of my business. He can get hurt on his own, I don't care as long as it is not on my conscience. Peace.

—Bruce “professional narcissist” Wayne.

So, yes. When faced with this book(WF: TT), I'd call Dixon's writing lazy.

I'm also comparing this to several other instances when Bruce verbally says (never to Dick, mind you) that he loves that Dick's a better person and better vigilante than him. But in the same book he'd yell at Dick for exactly the same thing. (I consider that lazy writing, since BTAS made sure to show a shot of Bruce smiling whenever Dick was happy/not like him).

I like this thing here where he says it to Dick's face. He's still grounding him for “discipline's sake” or whatever—very, very IC for Bruce.

But he also lets Dick know that he appreciates his values, that are different—better—than Bruce's own.

I can stomach that.

Honestly Bruce's writing in this book felt like BtAS writing (pre-Bruce Timm fuckery). That's a compliment.

P.S. Waid's a good story-teller overall. His Superman: Birthright was one of the first Superman comics I read and I fell in love with Clark right away.

Peace ✌️😂

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey, steph! how are you, like, genuinely? not the small talk. i wanna listen

Hey Lovely 💜🖤

I want to apologize for putting this off for so long... which should be a clue as to how I am actually doing.

Honestly? Not good, but I'm trying my best. It's been... a time. Will put under a cut for those who don't want to read about the tagged items.

TL;DR – my real life is a bit chaotic, and I hide a lot from y'all because I REALLY try not to be negative here since my blog is where I come to be happy AND because I am a very private person, but I try my best to just keep going day to day as the chaos settles down slowly.

I've got some good things coming though, so I hope a week's rest next week when I'm off (and will probably take a break from here too) will reset my brain.

Work has been insane, and is most of the cause of my mental distress for the past few months. From Easter until Canada Day Weekend at my job is lovingly referred to as "Silly Season" simply because of how on-the-fly, balls-to-the-wall our workload is until summertime downtime officially begins for us. Without disclosing too much, it's basically non-stop, long hours for me until one of the 3 break weeks we get during the this long stretch happens where, incidentally because of the nature of my job and the team I work on, it actually gets BUSIER for us.

It actually ended earlier than we expected this year (yesterday) and we'll be "quieter" until the end of September now. See an opportunity, I actually took next week off between the two long weekends because my mental health has taken a severe hit and I'm having trouble just... enjoying things? I'm haven't gamed or drew in a few weeks, and blogging and writing feels like a chore. I literally just come home, file this blog, reply to one or two asks, and then go to bed, and do it all over again the next day. Day in and day out, for 3 months. On weekends I have to force myself out of my apartment because I KNOW I will sink lower if I don't leave.

On top of that, my brain has convinced me that literally everyone hates me: friends, coworkers, family, you guys, my damned plants. I just feel very alone these days and... I'll be real here, I've almost abandoned this blog a few times in the past few months. I feel like I make fic lists that no one reblogs or likes and tell me they're all shit. I post my art and I barely break 20 notes. I write something and I get maybe 2 likes. I can't really answer any thoughtful asks because my mental state's been in the shitter for months. I desperately want to reply to the few sexuality asks I have and I physically can't. Being on my computer – after working ON a computer for my day job for 12 hour days everyday – feels like too much, so I try to limit my time on the blog now too.

I just try to keep carrying on, encouraged by the once-in-a-blue-moon testimonial ask I get thanking me for still being here. I thank YOU guys for reminding me that people still like coming here.

Stressed about money and food and rent just like everyone else, and just getting frustrated at other things.

And finally, my uncle (my dad's brother and my godfather) hasn't been doing well health-wise, and he's being moved to assisted living next week. His health has been declining since Easter, so it's been a bit of worrying time for relatives.

Having my therapist helps a lot. She talks me through a lot of my complicated feelings, my sense of self and ways to cope with my anxiety and stress. I'm talking to her again next week, so no worries, gang. As I said, I just keep on keeping on.

Some positivity though:

I booked next week off to try to just... recenter myself. To forget about everything and TRY to get back to doing the things I love. I will probably take a break from this blog as well during that time to limit my social-media time. It's not ideal but I need a break from my computer, I think.

I go to the gym a lot more these days, which has helped with the seething annoyance I constantly have at work. Usually feel better after it.

And because of the gym and getting out more, I've been slowly feeling better physically, better than I have since before 2019. The break from work is for the mental health, LOL.

I'm getting my hair recoloured next week. Can't afford it, really, but I just REALLY need to feel better about myself again, and I always feel so different when I colour my hair. I was doing so good for awhile. I want that again.

Anyway, I'm sorry to bombard y'all with my complicated mess of a brain. I really do appreciate you asking, so THANK YOU. I rarely get asked in real life if I am okay because I keep very private due to past people betraying my trust. And I don't like seeing people unhappy, so I feel if I tell people about my problems, then I feel I am a burden, so I just... continue existing.

Thank you for letting me be a burden just this once.