#Da Yu Hai Tang

[addictivecontradiction]

大鱼海棠, 2016

[northerngoshawk]

see the sky and sea (and remember me)

IX. storm (风暴)

Story Summary: Sixteen-year-old Katara was about to partake in the most important ceremony of her life: a rite of passage through the human world as a dolphin. But then everything goes horribly wrong, and a boy sacrifices himself to save her. She brings him back to life with magic, but at costs not even she could’ve imagined. AU based upon the movie 大鱼海棠. Multi-chapter.

Chapter Summary:

Dark clouds loomed over all parts of the world, from the North to the South, the East to the West. In the North, those who lived by the way of water emerged from their igloos to look up at the sky, whispering to each other worriedly whether they had upset Sedna and if this was her way of punishing them. In the South, those who breathed fire lit the streets with their flames, praying to Agni to bring the light of the sun back to the world. In the East, those who could bend rocks to their will raised walls of stone and pleaded to Tudigong to aid them. And in the West, those who soared along with the winds evacuated to higher ground on the backs of the great Wind Horses, calling upon Mahakala to protect them all. - As the barrier between the mortal and spirit realms breaks, the White Lotus scramble to find the cause.

...

Iroh looked solemnly to the horizon as an enormous tidal wave of seawater washed over the land, engulfing the world in an ocean. He grimaced as a flash of lightning flashed through the sky among the heavy, dark clouds, followed a split-second later by the roar of thunder.

In all his long years as Grandmaster, he had never once encountered such a catastrophe on such a huge scale, not since the days of the Hundred Year War. He had hoped his reign as Grandmaster would end quietly, that he would pass the mantle on down to his heir and pass peacefully. In fact, he had almost been certain that this was how his reign would end.

So much for that, he thought wryly to himself.

Movement rustled out of the corner of his eye, and he turned to see Jeong Jeong walk up next to him, regarding the approaching tide with a grim expression. "The seawater from the mortal realm has broken through the barrier between our worlds," he muttered sourly. His eyes darkened. "I fear we have displeased the gods."

As if in response to Jeong Jeong's grim proclamation, the ocean crashed against the ledge they were standing on, spraying them all with salty water. Iroh braced himself against the impact, digging his heels into the ground in a stiff stance. A gust of wind tore at his robes, but he slammed his staff into the ground and held firm.

When the ocean waves receded, Iroh straightened. "Whatever is causing this disturbance must be removed," he agreed. He turned to his niece and nephew, Azula and Zuko. "We must find what it is and eliminate it."

read more on ao3 or ffn

[lesbianyaomo]

years later, same takes. stop it!!! none of them asked to be saved!! none of them asked for their loved one's sacrifice!! they did it for each other anyway because of the profundity of their love and the immense debt of being given a life!! qiu sacrifices because he can't stand to see her suffering, but chun sacrifices because she can't stand to see anyone suffering!!

once she saw the damage of her decisions, she died to reverse it, she was ready for that to be the end and her recompense. qiu isn't owed her affection—he made his choice whether he had it or not. y'all were not watching the movie!!!

a lot of interpretations of Big Fish and Begonia don’t work if you don’t take into account that the overarching theme of the story is about the beauty and humanity in self-sacrifice, expecting nothing in return but the happiness of the person you sacrificed for😔

[reinaka42]

Wang Chuan Feng Hua Lu (忘川风华录) Masterpost

Wang Chuan Feng Hua Lu (忘川风华录) is a Vocal synth (Vocaloid and SynthV) music project. It consists of songs themed around different figures throughout Chinese history. The project is a collaboration between different artists and creatives, with music and videos featuring prominent traditional Chinese elements. The project's title translates to "The Records of Magnificence of the Wangchuan" - In Chinese mythology, "Wangchuan" (or River of Forgetting) is a river in the Underworld that can rid one of their past life's memories, similar to the river Lethe.

A mobile game adaptation has also been developed by NetEast. Unfortunately, I haven't played it so I can't give much insight on it. However, I assume that its premise is similar to that of the idea behind the project as a whole: all these historical figures meeting each other in the Underworld after they died. Maybe.

You can find all the songs on Bilibili. The official Weibo can be found here. The game's website, which includes all characters appearing so far in the game, can be found here, and its Weibo can be found here.

(If you prefer YouTube, I've also put together a handy playlist. Please know that most of these videos are reposts though, so please watch the original Bilibili MVs if you can!)

This blog is where I will be posting everything I feel like I need to say about the songs in this project. A lot of it is lifted from my Twitter account but will be in much more detail. Note that I probably won't touch collab songs, or songs that don't focus solely on the project's own characters.

Disclaimer: I do not speak Chinese, nor am I an expert on Chinese history. Therefore, I cannot reliably translate the lyrics to these songs, nor my words should be taken as gospel. I am merely a nerd gushing about my hyperfixation.

Playlist

多情岸 【Duo Qing An】 ➼ B link

洛阳怀 【Luo Yang Huai】 ➼ B link

易水诀 【Yi Shui Jue】 ➼ B link

山河令 【Shan He Ling】 ➼ B link

簪花人间 【Zhan Hua Ren Jian】 ➼ B link

栖凰 【Qi Huang】 ➼ B link

心上秋 【Xin Shang Qiu】 ➼ B link

祖龙吟 【Zu Long Yin】 ➼ B link

如见青山 【Ru Jian Qing Shan】 ➼ B link

竹林间 【Zhu Lin Jian】 ➼ B link

天下局 【Tian Xia Ju】 ➼ B link

青鸟衔风 【Qing Niao Xian Feng】 ➼ B link

木兰行 【Mu Lan Xing】 ➼ B link

好字唯之 【Hao Zi Wei Zhi】 ➼ B link

不可道 【Bu Ke Dao】 ➼ B link

水叙湖风 【Shui Xu Hu Feng】 (collab) ➼ B link

是非 【Shi Fei】 ➼ B link

风起甘露 【Feng Qi Gan Lu】 (collab) ➼ B link

谓剑 【Wei Jian】 ➼ B link

万象霜天 【Wan Xiang Shuang Tian】 (New Year event song) ➼ B link

千秋梦 【Qian Qiu Meng】 ➼ B link

易安难安 【Yi An Nan An】 ➼ B link

惊鹊 【Jing Que】 ➼ B link

高歌破阵 【Gao Ge Po Zhen】 (collab) ➼ B link

不赴 【Bu Fu】 ➼ B link

西行 【Xi Xing】 ➼ B link

大航海家 【Da Hang Hai Jia】 ➼ B link

牡丹乱 【Mu Dan Luan】 (collab) ➼ B link

倾国 【Qing Guo】 (collab) ➼ B link

相虎 【Xiang Hu】 ➼ B link

补天裂 【Bu Tian Lie】 ➼ B link

此期盈期 【Ci Qi Ying Qi】 (1st anniversary song) ➼ B link

破云来 【Po Yun Lai】 ➼ B link

归钓吟 【Gui Diao Yin】 ➼ B link

始见千秋 【Shi Jian Qian Qiu】 ➼ B link

临川浮梦 【Lin Chuan Fu Meng】 ➼ B link

将军行 【Jiang Jun Xing】 ➼ B link

妄语人间 【Wang Yu Ren Jian】 ➼ B link

数风流 【Shu Feng Liu】 (2nd anniversary song) ➼ B link

问剑春秋 【Wen Jian Chun Qiu】 ➼ B link

起战令 【Qi Zhan Ling】 ➼ B link

人间应又雪 【Ren Jian Ying You Xue】 ➼ B link

旷古回响 【Kuang Gu Hui Xiang】 ➼ B link

墨隐侠声 【Mo Yin Xia Sheng】 ➼ B link

桃源故人 【Tao Yuan Gu Ren】 (3rd anniversary song) ➼ B link

燕双归 【Yan Shuang Gui】 ➼ B link

拜云台 【Bai Yun Tai】 ➼ B link

思华年 【Si Hua Nian】 ➼ B link

承天 【Cheng Tian】 ➼ B link

*Note: The anniversary songs are probably for the game's anniversaries, as the project itself is more than 5 years old.

Albums

Vol 1: 溯洄 【Su Hui】 Includes character songs from Duo Qing An to Zhu Lin Jian. Features human vocals.

Vol 2: 踏浪 【Ta Lang】 Includes character songs from Tian Xia Ju to Yi An Nan An + Shui Xu Hu Feng.

Vol 3: 数风流 【Shu Feng Liu】 Includes character songs from Bu Fu to Yan Shuang Gui, and the two anniversary songs.

Visual character guide:

PRE-QIN | QIN | WESTERN CHU | HAN | THREE KINGDOMS | JIN | NORTH & SOUTHERN DYNASTIES | TANG | FIVE DYNASTIES & TEN KINGDOMS | SONG | YUAN | MING | QING | DREAM

[shookethdev]

a o e i i er ai ei ao ou an en ang eng ong i ia iao ie iu ian in iang ing iong u ua uo uai ui uan un uang ueng ü üe üan ün a o e er ai ao ou an en ang eng yi ya yao ye you yan yin yang ying yong wu wa wo wai wei wan wen wang weng yu yue yuan yun b ba bo bai bei bao ban ben bang beng bi biao bie bian bin bing bu p pa po pai pei pao pou pan pen pang peng pi piao pie pian pin ping pu m ma mo me mai mei mao mou man men mang meng mi miao mie miu mian min ming mu f fa fo fei fou fan fen fang feng fu d da de dai dei dao dou dan den dang deng dong di diao die diu dian ding du duo dui duan dun t ta te tai tei tao tou tan tang teng tong ti tiao tie tian ting tu tuo tui tuan tun n na ne nai nei nao nou nan nen nang neng nong ni niao nie niu nian nin niang ning nu nuo nuan nü nüe l la le lai lei lao lou lan lang leng long li lia liao lie liu lian lin liang ling lu luo luan lun lü lüe g ga ge gai gei gao gou gan gen gang geng gong gu gua guo guai gui guan gun guang k ka ke kai kei kao kou kan ken kang keng kong ku kua kuo kuai kui kuan kun kuang h ha he hai hei hao hou han hen hang heng hong hu hua huo huai hui huan hun huang z za ze zi zai zei zao zou zan zen zang zeng zong zu zuo zui zuan zun c ca ce ci cai cao cou can cen cang ceng cong cu cuo cui cuan cun s sa se si sai sao sou san sen sang seng song su suo sui suan sun zh zha zhe zhi zhai zhei zhao zhou zhan zhen zhang zheng zhong zhu zhua zhuo zhuai zhui zhuan zhun zhuang ch cha che chi chai chao chou chan chen chang cheng chong chu chua chuo chuai chui chuan chun chuang sh sha she shi shai shei shao shou shan shen shang sheng shu shua shuo shuai shui shuan shun shuang r re ri rao rou ran ren rang reng rong ru rua ruo rui ruan run j ji jia jiao jie jiu jian jin jiang jing jiong ju jue juan jun q qi qia qiao qie qiu qian qin qiang qing qiong qu que quan qun x xi xia xiao xie xiu xian xin xiang xing xiong xu xue xuan xun

NAKU 🫵

[eyenaku]

Ji ji fu ji ji

a o e i i er ai ei ao ou an en ang eng ong i ia iao ie iu ian in iang ing iong u ua uo uai ui uan un uang ueng ü üe üan ün a o e er ai ao ou an en ang eng yi ya yao ye you yan yin yang ying yong wu wa wo wai wei wan wen wang weng yu yue yuan yun b ba bo bai bei bao ban ben bang beng bi biao bie bian bin bing bu p pa po pai pei pao pou pan pen pang peng pi piao pie pian pin ping pu m ma mo me mai mei mao mou man men mang meng mi miao mie miu mian min ming mu f fa fo fei fou fan fen fang feng fu d da de dai dei dao dou dan den dang deng dong di diao die diu dian ding du duo dui duan dun t ta te tai tei tao tou tan tang teng tong ti tiao tie tian ting tu tuo tui tuan tun n na ne nai nei nao nou nan nen nang neng nong ni niao nie niu nian nin niang ning nu nuo nuan nü nüe l la le lai lei lao lou lan lang leng long li lia liao lie liu lian lin liang ling lu luo luan lun lü lüe g ga ge gai gei gao gou gan gen gang geng gong gu gua guo guai gui guan gun guang k ka ke kai kei kao kou kan ken kang keng kong ku kua kuo kuai kui kuan kun kuang h ha he hai hei hao hou han hen hang heng hong hu hua huo huai hui huan hun huang z za ze zi zai zei zao zou zan zen zang zeng zong zu zuo zui zuan zun c ca ce ci cai cao cou can cen cang ceng cong cu cuo cui cuan cun s sa se si sai sao sou san sen sang seng song su suo sui suan sun zh zha zhe zhi zhai zhei zhao zhou zhan zhen zhang zheng zhong zhu zhua zhuo zhuai zhui zhuan zhun zhuang ch cha che chi chai chao chou chan chen chang cheng chong chu chua chuo chuai chui chuan chun chuang sh sha she shi shai shei shao shou shan shen shang sheng shu shua shuo shuai shui shuan shun shuang r re ri rao rou ran ren rang reng rong ru rua ruo rui ruan run j ji jia jiao jie jiu jian jin jiang jing jiong ju jue juan jun q qi qia qiao qie qiu qian qin qiang qing qiong qu que quan qun x xi xia xiao xie xiu xian xin xiang xing xiong xu xue xuan xun

[tiaracinta]

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Sub - Full Episodes

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Subtitles

Kudi Liu Li and Pei Xing Jian have a harmonious marriage. When he is demoted from his position, she follows him to Xizhou where they encounter the young noble Qu Chong Yu. Qu Chong Yu is very wary of Pei Xing Jian who has suddenly been assigned an official post and purposely makes trouble for the new arrivals. The couple shares the same mind and heart in doing what's best for the people. Their sincerity eventually moves Qu Chong Yu thus turning an enemy into a friend. Meanwhile, Su Hai Zheng who is the Anxi Grand Protectorate have detained Pei Xing Jian for their own benefit. Liu Li mobilizes the people of Xizhou to write their pleas to help her husband return home. When danger looms, she once again uses her ingenuity in ensuring the safety of the people of Xizhou. (Source: ChineseDrama.info) ~~ Adapted from the novel “Da Tang Ming Yue” (大唐明月) by Lan Yun Shu (蓝云舒). Edit Translation

⬇️⬇️Watch Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 Eng Sub - Full Episodes⬇️⬇️

Website : https://tinyurl.com/2ubkuhe6

Related Content Weaving a Tale of Love (Chinese prequel)

Country: China

Episodes: 37

Aired: Nov 4, 2023 - Nov 25, 2023

Aired On: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Original Network: Youku, ZJTV

Content Rating: Not Yet Rated

Native Title: 风起西州 第二部

Also Known As: Weaving a Tale of Love 2 , Feng Qi Xi Zhou Di Er Ji , Feng Qi Xi Zhou 2 , 风起霓裳 第二部 , 风起西州 2

Director: Chan Ka Lam, He Zhen Hua, Yang Xiao Bo

Genres: Historical, Romance

Tags: Married Female Lead, Married Male Lead, Historical Fiction, Enemies To Friends, Smart Female Lead, Tang Dynasty, Adapted From A Novel, Friendship (Vote or add tags)

[oliviapurwanti]

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Sub - Full Episodes

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Subtitles

Kudi Liu Li and Pei Xing Jian have a harmonious marriage. When he is demoted from his position, she follows him to Xizhou where they encounter the young noble Qu Chong Yu. Qu Chong Yu is very wary of Pei Xing Jian who has suddenly been assigned an official post and purposely makes trouble for the new arrivals. The couple shares the same mind and heart in doing what's best for the people. Their sincerity eventually moves Qu Chong Yu thus turning an enemy into a friend. Meanwhile, Su Hai Zheng who is the Anxi Grand Protectorate have detained Pei Xing Jian for their own benefit. Liu Li mobilizes the people of Xizhou to write their pleas to help her husband return home. When danger looms, she once again uses her ingenuity in ensuring the safety of the people of Xizhou. (Source: ChineseDrama.info) ~~ Adapted from the novel “Da Tang Ming Yue” (大唐明月) by Lan Yun Shu (蓝云舒). Edit Translation

⬇️⬇️Watch Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 Eng Sub - Full Episodes⬇️⬇️

Website : https://tinyurl.com/2ubkuhe6

Related Content Weaving a Tale of Love (Chinese prequel)

Country: China

Episodes: 37

Aired: Nov 4, 2023 - Nov 25, 2023

Aired On: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Original Network: Youku, ZJTV

Content Rating: Not Yet Rated

Native Title: 风起西州 第二部

Also Known As: Weaving a Tale of Love 2 , Feng Qi Xi Zhou Di Er Ji , Feng Qi Xi Zhou 2 , 风起霓裳 第二部 , 风起西州 2

Director: Chan Ka Lam, He Zhen Hua, Yang Xiao Bo

Genres: Historical, Romance

Tags: Married Female Lead, Married Male Lead, Historical Fiction, Enemies To Friends, Smart Female Lead, Tang Dynasty, Adapted From A Novel, Friendship (Vote or add tags)

[yukyuknisa]

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Sub - Full Episodes

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Subtitles

Kudi Liu Li and Pei Xing Jian have a harmonious marriage. When he is demoted from his position, she follows him to Xizhou where they encounter the young noble Qu Chong Yu. Qu Chong Yu is very wary of Pei Xing Jian who has suddenly been assigned an official post and purposely makes trouble for the new arrivals. The couple shares the same mind and heart in doing what's best for the people. Their sincerity eventually moves Qu Chong Yu thus turning an enemy into a friend. Meanwhile, Su Hai Zheng who is the Anxi Grand Protectorate have detained Pei Xing Jian for their own benefit. Liu Li mobilizes the people of Xizhou to write their pleas to help her husband return home. When danger looms, she once again uses her ingenuity in ensuring the safety of the people of Xizhou. (Source: ChineseDrama.info) ~~ Adapted from the novel “Da Tang Ming Yue” (大唐明月) by Lan Yun Shu (蓝云舒). Edit Translation

⬇️⬇️Watch Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 Eng Sub - Full Episodes⬇️⬇️

Website : https://tinyurl.com/2ubkuhe6

Related Content Weaving a Tale of Love (Chinese prequel)

Country: China

Episodes: 37

Aired: Nov 4, 2023 - Nov 25, 2023

Aired On: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Original Network: Youku, ZJTV

Content Rating: Not Yet Rated

Native Title: 风起西州 第二部

Also Known As: Weaving a Tale of Love 2 , Feng Qi Xi Zhou Di Er Ji , Feng Qi Xi Zhou 2 , 风起霓裳 第二部 , 风起西州 2

Director: Chan Ka Lam, He Zhen Hua, Yang Xiao Bo

Genres: Historical, Romance

Tags: Married Female Lead, Married Male Lead, Historical Fiction, Enemies To Friends, Smart Female Lead, Tang Dynasty, Adapted From A Novel, Friendship (Vote or add tags)

[nadnadayu]

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Sub - Full Episodes

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Subtitles

Kudi Liu Li and Pei Xing Jian have a harmonious marriage. When he is demoted from his position, she follows him to Xizhou where they encounter the young noble Qu Chong Yu. Qu Chong Yu is very wary of Pei Xing Jian who has suddenly been assigned an official post and purposely makes trouble for the new arrivals. The couple shares the same mind and heart in doing what's best for the people. Their sincerity eventually moves Qu Chong Yu thus turning an enemy into a friend. Meanwhile, Su Hai Zheng who is the Anxi Grand Protectorate have detained Pei Xing Jian for their own benefit. Liu Li mobilizes the people of Xizhou to write their pleas to help her husband return home. When danger looms, she once again uses her ingenuity in ensuring the safety of the people of Xizhou. (Source: ChineseDrama.info) ~~ Adapted from the novel “Da Tang Ming Yue” (大唐明月) by Lan Yun Shu (蓝云舒). Edit Translation

⬇️⬇️Watch Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 Eng Sub - Full Episodes⬇️⬇️

Website : https://tinyurl.com/2ubkuhe6

Related Content Weaving a Tale of Love (Chinese prequel)

Country: China

Episodes: 37

Aired: Nov 4, 2023 - Nov 25, 2023

Aired On: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Original Network: Youku, ZJTV

Content Rating: Not Yet Rated

Native Title: 风起西州 第二部

Also Known As: Weaving a Tale of Love 2 , Feng Qi Xi Zhou Di Er Ji , Feng Qi Xi Zhou 2 , 风起霓裳 第二部 , 风起西州 2

Director: Chan Ka Lam, He Zhen Hua, Yang Xiao Bo

Genres: Historical, Romance

Tags: Married Female Lead, Married Male Lead, Historical Fiction, Enemies To Friends, Smart Female Lead, Tang Dynasty, Adapted From A Novel, Friendship (Vote or add tags)

[aulianadd]

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Sub - Full Episodes

Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 English Subtitles

Kudi Liu Li and Pei Xing Jian have a harmonious marriage. When he is demoted from his position, she follows him to Xizhou where they encounter the young noble Qu Chong Yu. Qu Chong Yu is very wary of Pei Xing Jian who has suddenly been assigned an official post and purposely makes trouble for the new arrivals. The couple shares the same mind and heart in doing what's best for the people. Their sincerity eventually moves Qu Chong Yu thus turning an enemy into a friend. Meanwhile, Su Hai Zheng who is the Anxi Grand Protectorate have detained Pei Xing Jian for their own benefit. Liu Li mobilizes the people of Xizhou to write their pleas to help her husband return home. When danger looms, she once again uses her ingenuity in ensuring the safety of the people of Xizhou. (Source: ChineseDrama.info) ~~ Adapted from the novel “Da Tang Ming Yue” (大唐明月) by Lan Yun Shu (蓝云舒). Edit Translation

⬇️⬇️Watch Weaving a Tale of Love Season 2 Episode 28 - 29 Eng Sub - Full Episodes⬇️⬇️

Website : https://tinyurl.com/2ubkuhe6

Related Content Weaving a Tale of Love (Chinese prequel)

Country: China

Episodes: 37

Aired: Nov 4, 2023 - Nov 25, 2023

Aired On: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

Original Network: Youku, ZJTV

Content Rating: Not Yet Rated

Native Title: 风起西州 第二部

Also Known As: Weaving a Tale of Love 2 , Feng Qi Xi Zhou Di Er Ji , Feng Qi Xi Zhou 2 , 风起霓裳 第二部 , 风起西州 2

Director: Chan Ka Lam, He Zhen Hua, Yang Xiao Bo

Genres: Historical, Romance

Tags: Married Female Lead, Married Male Lead, Historical Fiction, Enemies To Friends, Smart Female Lead, Tang Dynasty, Adapted From A Novel, Friendship (Vote or add tags)

[addictivecontradiction]

大鱼海棠, 2016

[freakuotes]

"¿Creen en los milagros? La..." - Chun (Big Fish & Begonia (Da Yu Hai Tang))

http://freakuot.es/1mQwoS

[foxie-wolfie]

Năm tôi 17 tuổi. Tôi bắt đầu yêu bạn mình. Năm đó con mèo chết và ông mất. Có sự chấn động khá mạnh khi ngồi nhìn ông thoi thóp cả tuần chờ bố về. Ông về 2-3 tuần thường tranh cãi nhiều với chú rồi sau lễ tang đi tiếp. Sáng sớm đó đi đường mờ sương tiễn ông. Tôi biết mình mãi mãi không cần một người cha nữa.

Tôi tìm đến nhà bạn, cũng một người con bị cha bỏ rơi. Ngồi ở đó xem bạn cười và rộn ràng, rực rỡ. Năm đó bạn đã có bạn trai. Tiền dù ít nhưng mỗi năm tôi đến thường sẽ mua áo đẹp tặng tôi. Như một đứa trẻ, tôi biết đã yêu rồi. Ngày sinh nhật cũng tặng người một bài hát tên Angel. Tôi tự gọi bạn là Angie. Biết người đó không bao giờ yêu mình. Biết rằng mình sẽ không được đáp lại.

Lên đại học, gặp một cô gái khác, tôi đã rất thích cô ấy. Hơi nam tính. Mùa hè có thể đưa tôi ra biển rồi chạy rú ga giữa trời đêm tám chục cây. Hai bên đều là đồi cát và trời sao. Tôi thích cô bạn đó đến mức, tôi quyết định bỏ rơi cô ấy. Lẩn trốn và cắt liên lạc. Tôi không phải đồng tính. Tôi không có dục vọng với con gái và cả con trai. Angie sẽ không bao giờ yêu tôi. Bạn sẽ luôn thương tôi, luôn luôn cho tôi đủ cái ôm rồi.

Tôi đã gần như tự nguyện độc thân trọn đời ở tuổi hai mươi. Vì tôi không biết mình là gì. Phim heo chưa xem bao giờ. Đàn ông ra sao không hiểu sự khác biệt rõ rệt. Bạn bè cả nam lán nữ tiếp cận đều như nhau. Có thể mời họ đến nhà qua đêm ngủ chung giường không vấn đề gì.

Tôi đã mời một người bạn hàng xóm nữ qua chơi như vậy. Không ngủ chung mà chỉ được phép vào nhà tuỳ thích lúc nào cũng được. Cửa nhà cũng chỉ có khoá ngoài không có khoá trong.

Một hôm đi cà phê, cô ấy đè tôi ra hôn. Tôi không hiểu. Cô ấy còn nữ tính hơn tôi. Tại tôi sai thích Angie, chứ con gái thì tại sao lại thích tôi. Một hôm tôi nhậu say, cô ấy vào nhà, cửa không khoá, rồi cứ thế cưỡng ép tôi trên giường. Mỗi sáng đều qua, cưỡng ép hôn vuốt ve, chỉ cho tôi thấy cơ thể đàn bà là như thế nào.

Tôi đã quen kẻ cưỡng hiếp mình gần hai năm. Bạn bè nữ đến nhà, cô ấy không cho phép. Tất cả số điện thoại nam giới đều xoá đi. Cô ấy ghen tuông la hét ngay trước mặt họ. Đến trước cửa công ty tìm khi tôi làm việc. Luôn gợi ý sẽ đến kể với mẹ tôi chuyện tôi ngủ với cô ấy.

Ngoài việc quấy rối đó ra thì cô ấy rất giỏi trên giường và dạy tôi tất cả về tình dục. Chỉ là đến một lúc, cô ấy báo đã có thai với người khác. Một kẻ cưỡng hiếp và quấy rối người khác. Lại được tôi hỗ trợ tài chính, gửi tiền nuôi. Lại mang bầu.

Tôi đã biết cách hủy hoại cuộc đời mình rất giỏi từ tuổi hai mươi. Chỉ là không hiểu, tôi ghét chính mình nhiều vậy, sao không tự sát sớm hơn? Không, tại vì tôi là một kẻ hữu dụng trên đời. Một vật hữu dụng chứ không phải một con người.

Tối qua đọc ngôn tình đầy cảnh cưỡng hiếp. Da thịt lại mẫn cảm y như lúc xưa mỗi sáng bị cô ấy tấn công. Tình yêu có thể có với kẻ khác, còn tôi đã từ chối tình yêu thật, tìm đến một kẻ dạy mình làm tình. Làm sao có thể có hạnh phúc?

Tại sao tôi lại kết hôn? Vì tôi muốn. Vì tôi biết trước sau mình cũng sẽ kiếm lại một kẻ bạo hành cưỡng hiếp mình như xưa. Nếu những cậu bạn tử tế tôi từng hẹn hò biết điều đó, chắc họ sẽ vừa giận vừa thương. Hoá ra tôi chỉ là một cô gái bị mắc kẹt với nỗi đau bị cha bỏ rơi và được đồng tính nữ cưỡng hiếp. Nếu họ đủ kiên nhẫn tháo mắc ra, tôi vẫn chỉ là một cô gái. Tôi không đủ mạnh mẽ làm một người đàn ông.

Tôi thích Yu vì em ấy biết điều đó và không bao giờ cười. Rốt cuộc một cái xương sống với đầy đinh có thể giúp em hiểu định kiến của loài người đóng lên bản thân thật vô cùng khó chịu. Chúng ta không cần điều đó.

[northerngoshawk]

see the sky and sea (and remember me)

V. soul (灵魂)

Story Summary: Sixteen-year-old Katara was about to partake in the most important ceremony of her life: a rite of passage through the human world as a dolphin. But then everything goes horribly wrong, and a boy sacrifices himself to save her. She brings him back to life with magic, but at costs not even she could've imagined. AU based upon the movie 大鱼海棠. Multi-chapter.  

Chapter Summary:

Just as Adlartok, Katara, and Sokka were growing in their own ways, so too were the storms plaguing the land. Downpours that once rarely lasted past two days could sustain themselves for weeks at a time. The rolling thunder booming overhead increased in intensity, and the roiling storm clouds had darkened to a near black that worried even the White Lotus. During one such stormy day, Katara had dashed towards her room after an onslaught of freezing rain disrupted practice with her mom. Automatically, she went for the spot where she usually Adlartok: a niche she carved out herself, placed down on the ground and behind the door so that when someone walked in, it would hide him. She got to her hands and knees and eagerly pulled out the bucket. But when she peered into it, all she saw was water. No. Panic slammed into her chest, knocking the air from her lungs. No. - When Adlartok goes missing, Katara and Sokka embark on a rescue mission.

...

Weeks passed, then months. Katara spent most of her waking days training with her mother, learning new waterbending forms and refining the precision of her techniques. Bit by bit, her powers grew stronger, which only meant more time spent on training to make sure she could control them.

Sokka was often off splitting his time between Kanna’s tutelage as a shaman-in-training and Hakoda’s trips to complete tasks. Sometimes it was shoring up the snow wall surrounding their tiny village; other times it was hunting for fish; and still others it was making trips to meet with the leaders of other villages. Whatever it was, their various tasks often kept them from crossing paths during the day.

But at night, when both their parents were in bed and the flame of their oil lamp was put out, Katara and Sokka would sneak away to let Adlartok leave his bowl and swim around in the air so he could stretch and exercise.

Katara was surprised at how quickly Sokka warmed up to Adlartok: grumbling and reluctant to tag along at first, his stony face soon gave way to genuine smiles whenever Adlartok peeped out of his bowl, chirping excitedly. And while Sokka still complained about it from time to time, Katara knew he was only really doing it for show.

In that time, Adlartok kept growing and maturing. After just a few short weeks, Katara had to move him into a bucket, the ceramic bowl too small to hold him. His skin was now taking on a pale orangish tint, the blue arrows starkly contrasting against it. His eyes, which had once seemed so big, were beginning to look more proportionate to his body.

And as she spent more and more time with him, she began to notice the little things.

read more on ao3 or ffn

[mexicangirlfox]

Big Fish and Begonia Icon set 1