#DID YOU SEE THE NEIGHBOUR THINGS
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riacte · 11 months ago
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Ren: "Hermitcraft isn't Hermitcraft without my friend False close by"
IM GOING TO EXPLODE HES SO SWEEET OH MY GOD OH MY GOD 😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
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kiwiplaetzchen · 7 months ago
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Boop.
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perilegs · 2 months ago
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i am my father's son (enjoyer of irl sidequests)
#i didn't get to do the sidequest i almost got though 😔#i exited my apartment. theres a guy outside and i greet him bc i assumed he was a neighbour#and he greets me back and then hes like im sorry i hopped over the fence as a shortcut idk if that's fine#nd then continued and said he'll check if he dropped something#and i'm like yea ok sure!#bc i was going to lidl and i wanted to get going but i did just stand there for a bit in case the guy needed help or something#then he emerged from the fence area and he was like ''if you find something in there can you pick it up akd put out a note'' and i was like#yea ofc! i'll do that if i see anything#and then he was like this is a very nice area so i trust people will let me know if i did drop something#and i was like for sure#im not great at smalltalk but he was very polite so i tried my best#also he seemed like he wasnt having the best time#he might have been on something bc he was slurring his speech and drooling a lot and there was a certain look in his eyes but honestly that#none of my business#we said bye and i sat in my car and then he was like ''hey actually i live like a minute away super close but my bag is super heavy#can i get a ride there it's super close next to [redacted]''#and i moved my bag from the front seat and was like ''yea sure''#and then he stared at me for a bit and was like ''actually i dont want to bother you have a nice day bye'' and left with a wave#i was like you too and waved back#he didnt look like he had any trouble walking so i came to the conclusion that he's fine and then went to lidl#but honestly i am a bit disappointed he didnt want me to give him a ride after all bc he seemed like he would have interesting things to sa#he was super polite and talked a lot and despite me being a finn i dont always mind strangers talking to me#bc if i have nothing important to do it's like. might as well!#another chat outside my apartment ive had was this old lady and she knew a lot about the history of the area we live in#and it was very interesting and also like i said if im in no hurry to go anywhere i love listening to ppl yap about whatever#i hope both the fence hopping guy and the old lady are doing good#leevi talks
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poisonandpages · 11 months ago
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Every year my village community centre puts on a "Winter Wonderland" that's basically just a Santa's Grotto plus a bunch of mascot characters from kid's tv shows. They were short on volunteers this year so I stepped in to be one of the dogs from Paw Patrol (I only said yes because it was the firefighter, Aunty Anna ain't promoting cops). I spent about three hours dancing and goofing off in this costume I couldn't see out of (there were moments I didn't realise a kid was near me until they ran into my shins), and I sweat so much my clothes were all soaked and a shade darker by the time we finished up, but it was a good night. I really hope it was a memorable time for the kids.
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mallahanmoxie · 1 year ago
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not to be extremely pessimistic during this unsolicited panic attack brought on by the flood of tiktoks i just got on my fyp but i dont think there could be anything more humiliating to me personally than getting killed by a gringo during an invasion to seize our natural resources. which they would do. as they have done so before. christ.
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fingertipsmp3 · 1 month ago
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I love having Thursdays off because I can’t get a single goddamn thing done if I tried
#i’m just going to tally for you all of the people that have disturbed me today#9am my neighbour giving me more red yarn for the community poppy thing#11ish; my stepdad seemingly just wanted to show up and be on his phone at someone else’s house#noon the post arrived#half past 12 the rington’s man showed up selling tea and biscuits (i bought triple chocolate cookies and shortbreads)#2pm my mooncat order arrived ahead of schedule (and none of it broken as far as i can see 🎉🎉🎉)#i’m currently wearing am i everything you fear? from the siren collection and it’s a bit lighter than expected but i still really like it#tried to get a picture but can’t do it justice#on me (pale as fuck but very warm toned skin) it looks like a blue to yellow to pink multichrome shimmer#3pm my meal kit box arrived#4pm my neighbour showed up AGAIN with knitting needles this time and i was like girl i have a ridiculous amount of knitting needles#DO NOT bring any more into my house or they will multiply#then my stepdad showed up again 10 minutes ago#i’m so tired#did i mention my tv’s been acting up all day?#the only things it’s let me watch all the way through with no problems have been two horror movies#one (baghead) was okay and the other (the relic) was dire#it acted up so bad when i was trying to watch the terror and then santa clarita diet that i just gave up#ended up watching the ricky gervais show instead#i literally was like ‘okay awesome i have a day off; i’ll binge a series i’ve been meaning to watch for ages’#and the outside world and also my tv simultaneously said FUCK your binge#at least my nails are done#personal
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homunculus-argument · 9 months ago
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Another worldbuilding application of the "two layer rule": To create a culture while avoiding The Planet Of Hats (the thing where a people only have one thing going for them, like "everyone wears a silly hat"): You only need two hats.
Try picking two random flat culture ideas and combine them, see how they interact. Let's say taking the Proud Warrior Race - people who are all about glory in battle and feats of strength, whose songs and ballads are about heroes in battle and whose education consists of combat and military tactics. Throw in another element: Living in diaspora. Suddenly you've got a whole more interesting dynamic going on - how did a people like this end up cast out of their old native land? How do they feel about it? How do they make a living now - as guards, mercenaries? How do their non-combatants live? Were they always warrior people, or did they become fighters out of necessity to fend for themselves in the lands of strangers? How do the peoples of these lands regard them?
Like I'm not shitting, it's literally that easy. You can avoid writing an one-dimensional culture just by adding another equally flat element, and the third dimension appears on its own just like that. And while one of the features can be location/climate, you can also combine two of those with each other.
Let's take a pretty standard Fantasy Race Biome: The forest people. Their job is the forest. They live there, hunt there, forage there, they have an obnoxious amount of sayings that somehow refer to trees, woods, or forests. Very high chance of being elves. And then a second common stock Fantasy Biome People: The Grim Cold North. Everything is bleak and grim up there. People are hardy and harsh, "frostbite because the climate hates you" and "stabbed because your neighbour hates you" are the most common causes of death. People are either completely humourless or have a horrifyingly dark, morbid sense of humour. They might find it funny that you genuinely can't tell which one.
Now combine them: Grim Cold Bleak Forest People. The summer lasts about 15 minutes and these people know every single type of berry, mushroom and herb that's edible in any fathomable way. You're not sure if they're joking about occasionally resorting to eating tree bark to survive the long dark winter. Not a warrior people, but very skilled in disappearing into the forest and picking off would-be invaders one by one. Once they fuck off into the woods you won't find them unless they want to be found.
You know, Finland.
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Idk where I heard/read this but I think it sums up Gale's decision in Mockingjay & why he's & Katniss's relationship could never recover after the Capital bombing which is that - Gale never wanted to kill Prim but he was fine with killing someone else's "prim".
Like they were civilians & medics (I don't care where they came from) they didn't desserve to die.
Gale did not kill Prim. He didn’t order the bomb strike and he didn’t drop the bombs. 
He did however create a bomb (with Beetee) that was deigned to pray on human kindness and target medical personal since it was rigged to blow again after help for the first explosion arrived.
At some point, Gale and Beetee left the wilderness behind and focused on more human impulses. Like compassion. A bomb explodes. Time is allowed for people to rush to the aid of the wounded. Then a second, more powerful bomb kills them as well. - Mockingjay page 177
The fact that his bombs killed Prim is very important to the story, but not as a way to resolve the love triangle (bc Katniss would have chosen Peeta, bombs or no bombs but that’s for a different analysis). 
“Beetee and I have been following the same rule book President Snow used when he hijacked Peeta.” says Gale. - Mockingjay page 177
Gale making the bombs that killed Prim is important because it shows the horrors of war. It demonstrates how when you stoop to the level of cruelty and atrocities as your opponent, you hurt everyone around you, especially the people you are trying to protect. 
Gale didn’t mean for his bombs to kill Prim, but that doesn’t matter in the end, because his bombs were designed to target compassion and Prim was the embodiment of compassion. 
Gale didn’t mean for his bombs to murder innocent children but that doesn’t matter because he was willing to do anything to win the war and the includes the mass murder of children. 
It’s important that Gale’s bombs killed Prim because it shows that there are consequences to praying on human kindness. 
It shows that the innocent pay the price of war. Katniss is going to have to live with the knowledge that her best friend created the bombs that killed her sister, and yes he never meant to hurt Prim but that’s war. Gale is going to have to live with the guilt and the knowledge that his need to win the war at all costs lead to the death of the little girl he had promised protect. Gale has to live with the fact that he played a hand in taking away the person Katniss loved the most, and he has to live with the fact that it cost him his best friend forever. 
Gale was just a kid, like Katniss and he chose to create something that would actively target compassion, not really thinking about the consequences it might have because all he wanted was to destroy the Capitol. And in the end, it he’s going to be living with that guilt and those consequences for the rest of his life. 
Katniss doesn’t cut off Gale because she’s not in love with him or whatever. Katniss can’t be around him at the end because she’s unable to ignore or tolerate the things Gale was willing to and justify do to win the war and how that lead to the death of her sister. Katniss and Gale reacted very differently to the war and their different perspectives and approaches were always going to get in-between anything they ever had (friendship or relationship). 
There is no winning a war without getting blood on your hands and Suzanne Collins showed it perfectly when she had wrote the arc with Gale, Prim and the bombs. 
Gale is not a villain, war isn’t black and white. He was young and trying to win a war but his actions have consequences and one of those consequences was Prim’s death.
Gale didn’t kill Prim and that makes it all the more tragic that he played such a big role in her death. 
#it's like the harma thing in atla#she didn't desserve to be kidnapped & tortured#and if her revenge was only towards the people who did that to her#or like other fire nation soldiers then yeah that would make sense#but she sperfically went after innocent villgers#like jet did#because in her truma she had convinced herself that anyone associated with the fire nation had to pay for her & her people's suffering#which is just not fair or logical#people can't control where they're born#& random civilians can't realistically stop their country's dictator from starting a genasidel war#and shown throughout the show it's not like everyone in the fire nation gets treated great either#cue 13yr old zuko being burned by he's dad in front a huge crowd for daring to be......kind#and he was litrually royalty#we see it with pollacks to#came from the capital#still had to work underground for 5 years with zero sunlight#probably due a minor transgression or some form of debt#or the president's own cousin fired from her job for becoming too ugly#katniss later even seems to realise that they're are economic layers to the capital and not everyone is super villan rich#like it was always portrayed on tv#because that's exactly how snow wanted the districts to think#look at our brightly coloured paradice that you can never be a part of#things are perfect here (outside of like morality obviously lol)#& things are awful were you are#because that's what the ancestors of tratiors desserve#and us “gracious” winners desserve perfection#but like irl#the west isn't a perfect becon of wealth or morality either#i can understand somone from a 3rd world country looking at us thinking we have it so easy#but it's like no the government lets people starve here to coz the 1% will let thier neighbours die if it means increasing thier money/power
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coffeeaddictandinsomniac · 5 months ago
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for those of you who read alstroemeria! might be a hot minute before another chapter comes out (even longer than normal) because i am rewriting the plot, kind of. more like adding in missing scenes and the like but planning those out instead of getting them mid scene write like i have been. i originally wrote alstroemeria for nanowrimo so it's pretty bare bones as that's what i thought i could achieve in one month. now that i'm not trying to do that, i feel like expanding on some things that didn't make it into the original (and fixing up those that did).
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seat-safety-switch · 2 months ago
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When we were kids, we didn't have access to cool power tools. Every summer, when the soapbox derby race was coming, we'd break into my neighbour's garage while he was at work. Then, we'd use his drill press, lathe, table saw, all the fun tools. Over the course of a week, a race car was produced, which is more than the workshop ever made during the rest of the year.
Sure, we could have asked him if we could have borrowed his tools, but no doubt he would want to be there to supervise. And then he'd want to help. We'd never get done while we were busy indulging the suburb-tinged fantasies of someone who didn't take wood shop and chose instead to idly worship at the altar of Television Presents: The Fantasy of Bob Vila in adulthood.
One year, Old Man Garrett got a security system. Probably this was because Ted (fucking Ted) didn't clean up the sawdust that one time like we asked him to. The old man must have seen the footprint, and realized that he did not wear size-seven Nikes. Child thieves, casing his precious table saw! Now, our humble breaking-and-entering had become significantly more difficult than "reach a coat hanger under the door and pull the emergency release."
With the help of some of the high-school kids who were taking electronics class, we managed to defeat the security system. We did so using an ancient Japanese technique known as "distract Old Man Garrett while he's setting it, and then cut the wires to the panel." I think it loses something in translation, but you get the gist of it. That year's car was especially sweet.
In adulthood, I got drunk and bragged to some work buddies about our little scam. They responded in abject horror, because I was still occupying the weird hump in the middle of a normal distribution of "acceptable crimes." It was terrifying to them to see one of their own, one of the suburbanites, speak openly about largely-harmless property crimes. What if we had been hurt, they shrieked. Around the water cooler, I would become a pariah, unless I could make amends.
I did hunt down Old Man Garrett after that, still feeling the sting of rejection. He was still on the property, and he still had a beautiful collection of immaculate cabinet-making tools in the garage. I rang his doorbell and, when he answered, I told him the whole story. He laughed.
"I knew it was you dumb shits from the beginning," he bragged. "Fucking Ted -"
"Fucking Ted," I echoed, unconsciously.
"Fucking Ted left his library book on building race cars behind on the workbench that first year. You didn't let him drive, did you?"
I shook my head. "We ran the car into him if the hockey-stick brakes ever failed."
We had a good laugh about the whole thing that evening, and I returned to work with my soul cleansed. It's just a pity Ted didn't know how bad he actually was at crime, before he tried to knock over that liquor store and all.
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readwritealldayallnight · 26 days ago
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“-other than that, wasn’t so bad.” Simon says, readjusting the material of the balaclava across the bridge of his nose with his free hand. His other hand is busy, keeping yours warm as you lead him down sidewalk after sidewalk.
The two of you have just finished having Sunday morning brunch at a local cafe, something you insisted was becoming ‘tradition’ after the second time it happened. And according to you, after finishing eating, (Simon never wanting to hear a word about you paying for a thing) the next part of this lazy morning routine calls for strolling about at a pace that he would normally find pointless, if not downright frustrating. But for you, he slows down.
“Butcher’s an interesting first job.” You reply, nodding along in thought. You picture a younger Simon, fresh out of school, probably fresh faced as well. He was likely as tall, though not yet as muscular as the military would make him. A meat clever in hand, bloody apron around his waist, he was likely still inadvertently intimidating people back then the way he does now. “I was mostly just taking babysitting jobs until I graduated. Liked it well enough.”
“I actually had to babysit a neighbour one time, when I was younger. Actual baby at tha’ too.” He tells you with a chuckle, slightly shaking his head at the memory.
“What?” You laugh as well, the image in your mind now swapping out the meat clever in a teenaged Simon’s grip for a drooling infant. “How did that work out?”
“Neighbour comes bangin’ on our door, she’s carryin’ the thing, it’s screamin’ its bloody little head off,” You roll your eyes at the way Simon refers to the child, swatting his arm playfully but listening on. “She tells me her husband thinks he’s havin’ a fuckin’ heart attack. None o’ the other neighbours are home or answerin’ the door. ‘Fore I know it, she’s passin’ me the kid, askin’ if mum can watch her while she drives him to the hospital. Next thing I know she’s gone and I’m left with the thing.”
“Oh my gosh! Well where was your mum?” You ask, in disbelief that you’ve never heard this story from him before, half wondering if he’s pulling your leg.
“She wasn’t home, I can tell you that! Only me and the new lil’ orphan were.” He utters, strengthening his grip on your hand as you start to hunch over with laughter.
“Okay so wait, you were home alone? Oh no! How long did you have to ‘babysit’ for?” You giggle.
“Well technically Tommy was there but he would’ve only been a hindrance, told him to stay in his room.” Simon adds, pulling his hand out of yours, only to wrap it around your shoulder, now that you’ve come to a standstill at a crosswalk, waiting for the light to change. “Fuckin’ nearly 4 hours went by before mum came home and took over. Longest hours o’ my life. I think that might’ve been the day I enlisted actually.”
You elbow his side as you continue to laugh, seeing that he’s teasing you at the end now. You open your mouth to tease him right back, but your eye catches sight of the shop you’ve been standing in front of, jaw dropping wider.
“Simon!” You’re pulling him with a strength he would otherwise be impressed by if he wasn’t so suddenly caught off guard, senses kicking into high alert now as his head swivels in search of the cause of your distress. “How have we never seen this before??”
Oh.
He should’ve known better.
He actually had been avoiding taking you down this street for a little while now, but had been too caught up in his story telling to notice the direction you’d taken in him. His subtle effort of wrapping his arm around you to tilt you away from the storefront obviously hadn’t worked out. He opens his mouth to answer, but can only sigh when you’re already making your way towards the entrance of the pet store.
“We’re only lookin’, right?” He asks loud enough for you to hear as he follows you in.
Wrong.
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hiddenworldofmary · 10 months ago
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my neighbour is singing abba again and it brings me so much joy that i’m considering trying to hunt him down to tell him he’s cool if i hear it again because third time’s the charm
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rackartyg · 11 months ago
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to imitate how animate dead works in tabletop i've installed a mod that makes its summons permanent and then every morning when the wizards are setting up everything else (mage armor, longstrider etc) i have cairie fire off a couple upcast ice knives to get rid of the spell slots she would've used for reasserting control. we're finishing off act 2 now so she's amassed a nice little squad of eight skellies, kept around for the price of two third level spell slots each morning. fun fact you can cast longstrider on summons
#origpost#arctic plays bg3#the ruined battlefield is full of old skeletons obviously and most of them are raiseable#thought i'd have to make it to the thorm mausoleum to complete cairie's army but nope#picked up the last two on the way to oliver with halsin and i do wonder how that would've gone over#cairie's perspective on it is like. she sees dead bodies as fundamentally a different thing from the living#that's not a person anymore so the concept of 'desecration' doesn't get through to her#except you know she's not as intellectually pure as that and mainly it's actually about Liking Necromancy For Nerd Reasons and being#perfectly willing to discard a few moral qualms that get in the way of practising it#so she still does imbue her thralls with some emotional significance#enemies are fine to raise because like we already killed them! is this really so much worse??#also: if you can't beat me join me bitch lmao get wrekt#(we had great fun with goblin zombies back in act 1)#and for the skeletons from the ruined battlefield she'd feel she's giving them a (second) chance to fight back#or if they were sharrans she's making them pay for what they did by having them help her fix it#but like. these may be halsin's old comrades or neighbours she's raising#and even disregarding the corpse desecration#halsin cares about The Natural Order and in FR lore necromancy is depicted as *vile* from that pov#otoh it doesn't seem like halsin has any personal animus against necromancy even with his personal history with the shadow curse#idk i'm not a Halsin Knower i was just Struck By Thoughts#i'm going to romance him this pt maybe i'll feel more secure in my thoughts after that#dunno if it'll be canon for cairie but i wanted to try it
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hedgehog-moss · 5 months ago
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I saw an astronaut walking on the side of the road today, which is the kind of thing my brain will placidly accept at first, only to go "Wait, an astronaut" a minute later once I'm done with my previous train of thought. By then I felt like it might be too late to stop my car, but I ended up stopping anyway because I didn't want to spend the rest of the afternoon wondering.
I waited for the astronaut to catch up with me since they were going in my direction, but they didn't. Eventually I got out of the car and retraced my steps, and after a bend in the road when I saw no one walking towards me I decided the visitor must have gone back to their spacecraft and I would never get an explanation for this—and then in the distance I caught a glimpse of the white space suit disappearing into the forest.
I managed to catch up with them and they turned out to be a distant neighbour of mine (let's call her M.), and what looked like a space suit when I was driving by was a beekeeper's outfit! (Sorry for the pointless suspense but I was taking you on the same little journey my brain went through.) M. was tickled when she learnt that I mistook her for an astronaut—she told me she'd borrowed her husband's too-big shoes which made her drag her feet, hence why she looked like she was having trouble readjusting to Earth's gravity.
Then she said that one of her hives had swarmed, and she was pretty sure she knew where the swarm was. I had no idea how swarming worked so as we walked in the woods she explained that when a hive becomes too crowded, the queen will get replaced by a new one, and the old queen will leave along with half of the bees. After this split, the swarm will cluster somewhere nearby and wait while scout bees fly away in search of a new hive location. "That's when you have to catch them—if you can find the swarm. But here it is!"
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I wasn't expecting quite so many bees!! I'm pretty scared of all flying creatures so allow me to pat myself on the back for what came next—I thought I was about to learn how to catch a swarm from a prudent distance, but M. asked if I could give her a hand, seeing as her husband was supposed to be here to help but clearly wasn't.
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The first step of catching a swarm was spraying the bees with sugar water, and I was glad not to be asked to help with that, as it seemed like something that could make bees angry. ("On the contrary, it makes them less agitated!" I was told, but that remained to be seen.) Step 2 was pulling on a rope tied to the tree branch in order to lower the swarm into the new hive, and that was the job I was recruited for. The rope was long enough that I could stand several metres away to pull on it, but my role in this swarm-catching business was still all too clear to any angry bee looking for someone to blame.
I remembered reading that bees can sense the electric field of flowers, so I thought there was no way they wouldn't sense the staticky nervousness coming from the rope-puller, but thankfully they completely ignored me.
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M. was offering one fun fact about bees after the other, in a very relaxed voice, which was very interesting and very soothing for both me and the bees. She said this particular colony was very sweet ("some bee colonies are meaner than others?" "yes of course"), and that swarming usually happens a bit earlier in the year "but it's been raining so much lately, the bees had to postpone all their activities, just like us" and also "swarming involves quite a bit of planning ahead of time; for example worker bees have to put the queen on a diet so she won't be too fat to fly. Did you know that?" I did not!
Unfortunately our first attempt to catch the swarm failed. The bees entered the hive, had a quick look around their new home, then left in disgust and formed a thick, angry, buzzing cloud over our heads, while I tried to think nothing but bee-loving thoughts to make my electric field harmless and friendly.
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Then one after the other all the bees returned to the exact same spot on the branch where we'd first found them. ("Because it smells like the queen" said M.) We examined the near-empty hive and found that a mouse had made a nest in there! She was no longer here but the traces of her passage were evident (some of the comb was very nibbled.)
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As we were removing the supplies brought in by the mouse (sticks, hay), M.'s husband joined us and he had brought a spray bottle containing some sort of bee-attracting liquid (pheromones?) (I didn't have a close look at the bottle because I made sure to stay far away from the bee-attracting liquid, while he sprayed it inside the hive.)
He had also brought a white sheet which he spread under the tree, explaining that the bees will want to get away from the bright surface and look for darkness, thus hopefully getting inside the box. Another thing I learnt is that once the queen enters the hive, the nearest worker bees will spread the message by turning round and fluttering their wings to send a chemical signal in specific directions, which will be picked up by other bees farther away; at strategic intervals some bees will light the beacons of Gondor turn round and fan their wings to relay this scent-message until the entire colony is informed of the queen's new location.
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We were more successful the second time around! This time the bees who went in didn't immediately get out again to return to their branch. Well I say "we" but I didn't volunteer to pull on the rope again, so I can't claim any role in this victory. But my personal victory was that I stood quite a bit nearer this time so I could watch everything closely, and I felt more intrigued than nervous. Bees were constantly zipping past me but it had become clear that my electric field was pure and they bore me no ill will. I was always fond of bees from afar and happy to see them do their thing in flowers in the spring, but today's adventure got me interested in their daily life as well, so I think I'll read some books about bees this summer!
I was reading last month about the morality of termite colonies (Maeterlinck's La vie des termites) and I had a feeling this man must have written some poetic stuff about bees as well—and he did. Here's a translated excerpt from his book "La vie des abeilles" :)
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pandoraspurgatory · 1 month ago
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What Friends are for
Bakugo Katsuki x Fem!Reader. Katsuki cant masturbate, and it’s up you to help him out<3
I’ve been utterly obsessed with this headcanon since I saw it on AO3, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do
Cw: Masturbation, FWB, BJ, Ball play, Slightly Submissive Katsuki, only slightly MINORS DNI
Being insatiably horny with no release, was a frustrating situation for anybody, though for Katsuki it was worse, bordering on making him insane. He heard it all the time, his friends constantly spouting “just jerk off, it’ll calm you down!” And similiar nonsense that made his blood boil. As if jerking off could change the course of the planet like his classmates chalked it up to be.
It was hard to ignore though, the United Alliance dorms had been a cesspit of horny young adults since the 1st year. Though now the class were in their 3rd year of Class 1A and were all 18; Sex was the hot topic of the year.
He didn’t understand the logic behind it, but somehow once everyone became legal adults, the taboo flew out the window and immersed itself as casual conversation.
It was only last month that Denki and Kirishima made an attempt at the infamous ‘No Nut November”. Katsuki never bothered to ask how long they lasted, though was tempted to join the class betting pool on who would loose first.
Though in hindsight the NNN betting pool was a horrific idea, with half the class trying to set up Kirishima, and half the class trying to set up Denki. Katsuki is confident he never wants to see Mina dressed up as Midnight again after that ordeal, or Mineta in a maid costume.
He wouldn’t admit it within an inch of his life, but Katsuki had never successfully touched himself. There were multiple attempts of humping into his mattress, grinding himself against his pillow and even a weird porn meditation thing he found that was supposed to make him ‘cum with his mind’. It failed miserably, he doesn’t like to think about it.
The issue is his quirk, he can only stroke and pump himself for about 30 seconds until his palms start to spark and he ends up with burns all over his shaft. There are the options of hand free masturbating tools made for people with the same predicaments, though he couldn’t bare the humiliation if his classmates ever found out about it.
It wasn’t until he bit the bullet and tried to do it again. It happened like clockwork every few months, and it always ended the same unsatisfying and painful way.
It was 1am in the morning. Katsuki was rarely up this time of the night, but this particular morning he woke up with a painfully hard erection and his dick dripping precum from a rather erotic dream he had.
A wall away, you slept soundly in your bed, covers snug up to your chin as your heated mattress protecter added extra comfort to your needed slumber. Though that peacefulness was soon interrupted by the sound of small explosions and a frustrated groan coming from the wall opposite your bed.
Having Bakugo Katsuki as a dorm room neighbour was usually pleasant. Though despite his crude personality and edgy nature; he was a clean, quiet and reserved person. Respecting the quiet curfew of the dorms.
Hence why hearing him in distress was out of the ordinary, you shot up in bed, listening for more noises as you quickly emerged from your warm sheets.
Thoughts swarmed through your mind, was Bakugo sick? Having a nightmare? Lost control of his quirk?Did a villain get him?? You two were particularly close, and you came to the conclusion he couldn’t be too mad if you barged into his room at this hour. For all you knew, he could have lost control of his quirk and charred half the room by now.
Throwing on your warm oodie and a pair of slippers, you exited your dorm and walked the few metres to Bakugos door. Hesitating for moment on whether to knock or not, eventually deciding it was futile, how could he open the door and greet you if he was being attacked by a villain?
Despite expecting the dorm room to be locked shut, the door swung open after you gripped and turned the handle. Katsukis room was pitch black, only slightly lightened by the sparks emerging from his palms every few seconds.
The sound of fabric rustling and panted breaths filled your ears as you felt for the light switch, ready to activate your quirk any second incase there was actually a villain hiding somewhere around you. You finally found the switch and hit it, bright light encased the small room, revealing Katsuki sitting up on his bed.
Before you could properly stare at his horrified and bewildered face and red cheeks, your eyes caught on to the sight of his hard cock. Leaking precum into his sheets and bouncing back against his abdomen as he tried to shove it down.
He felt his aching dick twitch, he only felt himself grow harder as he looked at your face. It was grossly perverted and Katsuki damn well knew it. However it couldn’t be controlled after his vivid dream of pounding you into the mattress, the dream which brought him to his exact situation. The meek sound of your voice tore him from his racing thoughts.
“Bakugo… I’m so sorry… I thought you were in danger”
He swallowed, if he wasn’t in danger before then he definitely was now. Only god knows who you could message and call about this later, for all he knew he could go downstairs tomorrow only to be relentlessly teased for gawking at you as he sat there stark naked. He had to say something, before you-
Fuck… what? Why were you? He couldn’t believe his eyes as you walked up to where he was and sat beside him. You placed your hand over his with a small smile creeping onto the corners of your mouth. His throat felt painfully dry like it was filled with cotton.
“Kats… spill it”
“Spill what idiot? That you’re creeping into my room like a crazy woman, how dare-“
“Seriously, people don’t get hard and decide to explode their room at 1 in the morning.”
This was it, the moment of truth he had spent his teenage years dreading. To top this shitshow off, he would have to tell the truth to the person who got him all hot and bothered like this in the first place. Fuck, he couldn’t say it, he couldn’t admit that-
You interrupted once again.
“I’ve heard of this before, that some people get too… excited and set off their quirks when trying to pleasure themselves… is this the first time it’s happened?”
He swallowed his pride, there was no getting out of this one no matter how hard he tried.
“Try every time, I’ve never been able to fucking do it”. He growled, looking to the opposite side of the room to avoid meeting your gaze.
He began to mentally prepare himself to get the ridicule of a lifetime. Katsuki was what everyone wanted to be - strong, resilient, determined, and yet he couldn’t even jerk himself off.
“Can I help? If that’s okay…?”
The word please escaped his mouth before he could even think of a reply. He groaned as he realised how desperate he sounded for you to touch him.
Only moments later you pushed him down onto his plush mattress, wrapping your hand around his achingly hard length as it throbbed under your touch. His quiet groans quickly turning into a desperate moans as you started to stroke him at a slow pace.
The dream that awoke him only minutes earlier played back in his mind, his dick pulsated as he relished in the vision of you fucked out of your mind while his fat cock was stuffed into your soaked tight pussy.
He met your gaze through half lidded eyes, you smiled at him, signalling that it was okay. He finally felt himself relax into your warm and comforting touch, low moans escaping from his lips as you focused on rubbing his tip.
He would’ve thought by now he would’ve blown up his whole room, he wasn’t sure why his palms weren’t sparking and igniting. Though he chose not to dwell on it. Out of sight, out of mind he figured.
You stroked him slowly, trying to execute a confident demeanour despite the fact your mind was racing in a thousand different directions. You had your hands around the fat cock of Bakugo Katsuki, your only weakness and crush… no obsession of three long years. You had yet to be pushed away or blown to bits, so that had to be good news of some sort to indicate he was entranced as you were.
Your panties grew increasingly damp as you listened to his strained gasps, as much as you wanted to hop up and eagerly jump on his dick and have him make you his bitch until morning, this was about him and making him feel good.
Though it was now or never if you were going to tame the beast, slowly but surely you opened your mouth and wrapped your lips around his shaft. Without any warning, he bucked his hips into your face, his eyes rolled back into his head, your touch earning a whine from the back of his throat.
It took all his restraint not to fuck your throat until you were slobbering all over him like the slut he was going to make you. But his quirk hasn’t activated yet, and he wasn’t going to risk it happening in a moment like this.
You bobbed up and down, savouring his musky scent as you began to bring your focus to his throbbing tip yet again. Hollowing your cheeks as you sucked and swirled your tongue over him, tasting his slick precum.
An unexpected, high pitched whine filled your ears as you began to fondle his balls slowly, squeezing every now and then to truely give him the height of pleasure. Feeling increasingly proud of yourself as each ragged gasp emerged from him.
Katsuki couldn’t focus, completely blissed out at the exhilarating feeling of you pleasuring him with your lewd mouth. He always anticipated himself to be rough and dominant in the bedroom, though you had him trembling under your touch.
“Hnngg… feels so fucking good… keep- mhhmmm… going pretty girl”.
His husky voice was all you needed, sucking in a breath as you deepthroated his cock as you cupped and grabbed at his balls. You tried not to gag, his length was average but his girth was intense for a beginner like you. The corners of your lips aching as you struggled to envelop all of him into your mouth.
Katsuki suddenly grabbed a fistful of your hair as to try and suppress the urge to immediately spill himself down your tight throat. Where the fuck you leant this, he didn’t know. His face was flushed and his hair disheveled as you continued to suck him dry.
He hoped he’d have more warning to his impending orgasm, though as he felt his legs tremble and cock pulsate in your mouth. He could only manage to mutter a heads up.
“Fu… fuck.. nhgg… cumming”
You didn’t need to think twice, you wanted to feel his thick cum in your mouth as soon as the universe would will it, but it was no fun not seeing the action. Parting your lips from his dick, you gave him a few quick pumps as he quivered, spilling over the edge.
With a final grunt and a slight convulsion, he began to shoot his cum onto your face. The feeling of how his cock pulsated with each load made you weak. He knew there was nothing more fucking beautiful than the erotic look on your face as he ejaculated onto your lips.
His climax hit him like a freight train, shockwaves calming down in his body as his cock finally finished spilling itself. He looked at you, a dorky smile on your face as you gripped his hand.
He understood it all now, and there was no fucking way in hell he would ever participate in No Nut November with you around.
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fingertipsmp3 · 6 months ago
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I swear to god everything from the weather to my equipment to my neighbours to my own fucking body is conspiring to make sure I don’t get a good run this week
#let me see if i can get the timeline right here#tried to run on sunday but my treadmill was acting up by making the loudest knocking noises i have ever heard in my LIFE#after some consultation with google and the manual and my mother (who i assume knows everything) i realised i hadn’t oiled it since i bought#it in uhhhhhh fucking september. so i oiled it. couldn’t run on it same night because i was worried about oil#so i was like fine okay. postpone one day. that was monday. my period arrived 4 days late and with a ferocity that had me hiding#under a blanket and praying for death. fine. postpone one more day#tried to run yesterday and my leggings kept falling down. so much that i rage quit. i think i ran 5 minutes in total#i didn’t even think oh let me get changed and try again. i just decided it was all over for me#postponed until TODAY. the hottest fucking day i have experienced since last summer. fab#tell me why i was 100% in the zone and my neighbour came and BANGED ON THE WINDOW AND SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME#we are all very lucky i didn’t fall off. if she’d caused me to dislocate my knee (my recurring body problem 🙃) i would genuinely have killed#her. she would be an ex-person#and the kicker is ALL SHE WANTED TO KNOW WAS IF I WOULD FEED THE HEDGEHOG AND WATER HER PLANTS WHILE SHE IS GONE#this isn’t a personal pet hedgehog or anything like that mind you. this is a wild hedgehog. it can feed itself#i was like yes of course i will IF you promise me you’ll never surprise a person on a treadmill ever again#she slunk off home like a kicked dog. like i’m sorry but if you don’t want to be yelled at about the consequences of your actions#don’t be a dick#i’d be less mean if she hadn’t witnessed me this time last year hobbling around with a cane#if she didn’t know the absolute MONTHS OF AGONY i went through just to be able to stand long enough to do normal activities like cooking#and showering; i’d be a little more lenient. but woman you can see me running on the treadmill i bought TO TEACH MYSELF TO WALK#WITHOUT A LIMP AGAIN. back in september i was stumbling along on that thing at 2km an hour. do you want me back there??????#drove me a little insane tbh#anyway i did finish my run. i wouldn’t say it was a GOOD run. almost having a heart attack kind of took me out of the zone#and i never got it back again. count your FUCKING days jean#personal
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