#DARK SALT 2
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Me and my besties played Gartic Phone Co-Op cookies and some whiteboard, here are the highlights part 1 :) Me and my pals: Orion: @meatcatt (hey thats me) Auto: @skyistheground Ounce: @/lynxmisnomer PeachTabby: @redvelvetscookieblog Animated gif's under cut
#my art#friend art#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#crk#gartic phone#shadow milk cookie#burning spice cookie#mystic flour cookie#eternal sugar cookie#silent salt cookie#pure vanilla cookie#white lily cookie#dark cacao cookie#moonlight cookie#part 2 will be up soon#its gunna be a long post sigh
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MERRRY NEW YEAR CHAT!1!1!1!!!!! Ermm I ran out of space in the tags goes to show how reluctant I am to shut my up fck abt these 2 buffoons [/aff] and in general about anything BUT that's otay. When I say "probably thr most toxic pairing in the game [...]" I mean it affectionately beast×ancient enjoyers would NOT be on my DNI list if I had one you're all welcome here💥💥💥💥💥💥💥 ANYWAYS.. have this ig‼️❕️❕️❗️❕️❗️❕️❗️❕️❗️❕️❕️❕️‼️ its finally not 2am!!
Also have this that was supposed to come with thr smilk design analysis thing aswell however didn't... pretend I'm super smart and know everything abt the French language and France and that I know what im talking abt here
I had to use Pinterest to find jester images because the MOMENT I tried finding ANY on GOOGLE I was IMMEDIATELY faced with AI "art" which PHYSICALLY makes me feel icky and disgusted and uncomfy and i have some strange genuine fear of looking at it or touching it so..
#crk#cookie run kingdom#shadow milk cookie#pure vanilla cookie#am i going to say chat or chattington everytime i adress someone that isnt me? yes#yes.. yes i am and nobody can stop me#cue certified evil laugh#this was supposed to go with the smilk design analysis but ermm it didnt ig ignore that#MERRY NEW YEAR BTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#13 DAYS LEFT ILY JANUARY💖💖#1 whole year of waiting for smilk was so worth it#shadowvani my beloved...........aufh#these 2 keep me awake at night /aff#take this with a bag of salt because im not a crk lore expert so like not 200% sure abt the dark moon magic stuff abt pv..#when i say “widely paired” that is exclusive to tumblr i love every crk fan here that draws crk or shadowvani the art makes me so happy..🫶
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i would let them run the most vile, filthy, nasty, dehumanizing train on me. all day, all night. all of them, no exceptions.
#salt lake crew#tlou#tlou2#the last of us#the last of us 2#my pictures#yes ive used these pics before and theyre really dark shut up#abby anderson#owen tlou#owen moore#mel tlou#manny tlou#manny alvarez#nora tlou#nora harris#jordan tlou#leah tlou#nick tlou#ali’s stupid thoughts 🫧#its 3am
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they should invent a little treat that i dont have to go get. ive earned it so i think it should just be magically presented to me
#i dont want to stop at the store on the way home..... it's gonna be dark :(#im already so tired and it's only 3:40#hello grace here#btw what i did to earn it is have to put up with daylight savings. im still alive and the sunset was at 5:30 last night#yes im going to keep complaining about this. it it takes my body 2 months to adjust to a one hour time change i deserve to be a little salt
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me: damn . wish the amphetamine salts actually did anything
me at 12:25 am having miscalculated my bedtime: i need a new tattoo and chicken tendies and the book sedonas and the book sunrises and the purple books (not sunset) and a different tattoo and sega wot and celeste (video game) and a new apartment and a new wardrobe and some decent goddamn cookies why are they so hard to FIND and
#in conclusion i need $25000 no questions asks#i do actually need to get out of bed again and Do Something until i can pass out again but lmao. lmao. decisions ? that’s salt stuff babyyy#[doechii voice] i can’t even cap no more this is a really dark time for me#you know. tuesdays. wednesdays. etc#talking 2 myself#i just wish anything WORKED#instead i am going to be LISTENING TO A DND PODCAST#and playing DORF ROMANTIK#until i pass out#and then ill sleep for three more hours#and then i’ll do it all over again. new tattooless. new shoeless. good foodless. wah. what’s the point.#forgot to mention i’m on HOUR THREE of just ↪️🔁🔀⤵️🔃🔄↩️🔃🔃🔄🔀🔁↪️↔️🔄🔄🔄
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Leon being able to cook but he can literally only make variations of chicken, veggies, and rice
What’s for dinner? Grilled rosemary lemon chicken, asparagus, and wild rice
The next day? Grilled cayenne chicken, steamed broccoli and cauliflower, ancient grain mix
Day after that? Caldo de pollo con arroz
#leon s kennedy#leon kennedy#literally just chicken veggies and rice#before he discovered the power of seasonings#he would only ever eat grilled chicken with a little bit of salt and pepper#he also discovered there’s more type of rice than short grain white rice#he also started making the time to find out what other vegetables existed#other than frozen mixed vegetables#he became an expert of the chicken veggie and rice combo#but if you asked him to make literally anything else#he’ll either set off the smoke alarm#or it’s way undercooked#resident evil 2#re2#resident evil 4#re4#resident evil 6#re6#re infinite darkness#re death island#re damnation#re degeneration#re vendetta
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finally got a weekend to myself and managed to finish, edit, and upload the latest chapter of my ganzelink fic today, fields of gold. this time with some semi-soulbonding zelink smut and dreams of being a newborn goddess at the dawn of time (and also sickass wolf dreams)
#fun fact that nobody asked for: the 'salt flat' area from Zeldas dream as Hylia is meant to be both the area from the Demise boss battle#and the Dark Link mini boss battle. ive got SO many Thoughts and Feelings™️ about Fierce Deity and a bunch of my own lore cooking#and how beloved they were to both Hylia and Demise that their 'death' changed the world forever. because it changed those 2 forever.#ganzelink#zelink
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Roxas ⚔️🍦
No. 13
#kingdom hearts#kingdom hearts chain of memories#kingdom hearts 358/2 days#kingdom hearts 2#kingdom hearts birth by sleep#kingdom hearts recoded#kingdom hearts dream drop distance#kingdom hearts 2.8#kingdom hearts 3#kingdom hearts melody of memory#kingdom hearts union x#kingdom hearts unchained x#kingdom hearts union cross#kingdom hearts dark road#roxas#organization xiii#sea salt trio
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elden ring is on sale, do i get it lads
#sam.txt#generally i tend 2 shy away from souls-like games cuz i think they'll b too hard 4 me#i've never played a dark souls game but i have played (but not finished) salt and sanctuary + hollow knight + blasphemous#i'm so curious abt it tho 👁️ & ig i could always refund the game if i don't think it's my vibe
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Dark Souls was a massive hit among gamers, and since there was no other game quite like this title, it became a whole new sub-genre of its own: the soulslike. The very facets that people once criticized Demon Souls for became some of the standout features of Dark Souls, and nearly every other Soulslike game that was inspired by this title. Here are some crucial mechanics that lay the groundwork for a good soulslike game.
#dark souls#souls like#soulslike#difficulty#open world#elden ring#salt and sanctuary#boss fight#sekiro#sekiro shadows die twice#lords of the fallen#lies of p#nioh 2#bloodborne#blasphemous
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What's an anti-anti? Or an anti for that matter
Oh my friend I am so sorry to introduce you to the shitpile that is antishipping discourse
Anti is short for "antishipper", which is someone who believes certain types of ships are immoral and nobody should ship them or engage with media about them. Exactly what types of ships that includes varies (because morality will always be vague at best and you can't meaningfully categorise anything into "always good" and "always bad"), but people usually take issue with incest, ships involving one or more minors, age gaps, etc.
I consider myself a proshipper/"anti-anti" purely because I think this kind of discourse is extremely inane and potentially harmful.
Antis tend to say "problematic" ships "normalise" harmful dynamics in real life, ignoring that exploring these ideas in fiction is a safe way of engaging with darker topics and sometimes people do so to process personal trauma. Personally I've found that reading fanfiction about dark topics made me wayy more emotionally prepared to handle discussion of them in real life.
And, as I said, it's nearly impossible to draw a solid line between what should be allowed and what shouldn't be allowed. Age of consent is an arbitrary number that's chosen because legally you need a strict number if you're going to enforce the law, but a person 1 year older and 1 year younger than the age of consent aren't actually that much different. Plus the law varies from country to country, but antis tend to choose the US age of 18 because the US dominates the internet. Age-gaps between two non-minor characters get even more blurry!! And let's not forget that a ship between two men is way more likely to be flagged as pedophilia than a ship between a man and a woman. Imo if you can't make a concrete rule about it there's no point in making a rule at all.
Plus it's fiction, and not even mainstream fiction, so it's hardly gonna cause any significant shift in real life culture. These ships get criticised to hell and back in fan spaces and people get properly harassed over it, but there are plenty of professional writers portraying these things in well known media and don't get much flack for it at all - because it's way easier to tear down a fan, your equal, than a creator. It seems to me that the problem isn't really "normalising" these behaviours, because if that was the case mainstream media would be a much bigger contributor than fandom
For some reason, toxic/abusive ships are less commonly criticised despite being objectively harmful to the characters involved, and incest is the one people hate the most despite it being (imo) the one least likely to cause actual harm to the characters. Also depictions of rape and sexual abuse are usually considered off limits but you rarely get the same criticism of, say, depictions of murder. The sexual aspect of the topic seems more important than the actual harm.
AND THEN there's the fact that antis generally only argue against the ships that make them personally feel uncomfortable. Different people have different boundaries for what they consider too far, and I lose my shit every time I see antis shipping something I know other antis claim is the devil. And often the whole thing gets coopted by someone who doesn't like people shipping characters A and B because they ship B and C. ("You can't ship these unrelated characters because they're sibling-coded which makes the ship basically incest" is something I've seen a truly bonkers amount of times)
So yeah. That's the whole mess. Like I said I dont really care about whether or not antis follow me? I'm proship purely because I don't think this is a conversation that needs to be had at all. Like who cares But, go wild, romanticise the hell out of the most repulsive things!! It's nobody else's business but yours. But if I see a mutual who followed me first reblogging "any proshippers who follow me should explode and die teehee ^-^" ONE MORE TIME I might actually explode
#take what i say with a pinch of salt because im obviously biased and youre free to come to your own conclusions but. yknow#also i feel wayyyy safer around people who openly ship filth (affectionate) than people who insist everything they ship is Pure and Correct#because 1) ideas of 'purity' are largely based in unexamined bigotry and you never know when that's gonna jump out at you#and 2) i think it's important to consider the dark aspects of ships bc to some extent youre considering dark things that exist in real life#antis dont want to do that they want to hide it all under the carpet and pretend it's not there#I'd much rather discuss fictional teenagers being groomed and isnt that fucked up? and call things 'groomercore'#because how are you supposed to spot groomer tactics if you dont do that?#ask#shipping discourse
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Dude your reblog on my headcanon -- I didn't even think of that! TvT Poor Osvald I swear to god, and it makes it even worse that I also headcanon that the guy doesn't take praise well and that I imagine that Harvey picked up on that and used it to make himself feel superior.
I hate this dude in canon so much so why the heck am I exploring his character in fic writing??
well in my professional opinion exploring the mind of someone who would go as far as Harvey does for superiority and knowledge is a fascinating delve for any psych student.
but in my personal opinion? We just loooooooove to see toxic yaoi winning 🖤🖤🖤
#Octopath Traveler 2#Osvald V. Vanstein#Harvey Valentine#Unfortunately I don’t care too much for Osvald on his own#But when put in a dynamic with HARVEY#They have the perfect personalities for a dark Looney Toons cartoon. Or a vaudeville act#Of course this is all in my very (un)professional opinion so take it with a grain of salt#Valenstein#Yeah I know Valentine isn’t his real surname. But I like it you know?
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going sugar free on april 1st so i can be a skinny legend for my bday but luckily for me today is march 27th so im bout to absolewtly fuck up this dairy free ice cream baybeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Prettiest catch
Yandere!Merman x Fem!Reader
Bunni’s Monstertober Event
Oct 3rd
Oct 2
Oct 4
warning: dubcon, yandere behavior, breeding, kidnapping
summary: you explore a cave by the beach and find an isolated spot to swim, but little did you know a merman that has been watching you for a while is waiting for you beneath the surface.
Hanging out at the beach in early October wasn’t the most fun activity you could have done, but it was either walk along the beach and pick up shells during the fall when no one was around, or go home and watch TV.
Getting some air was good for you, that’s what your therapist had said. A little adventure was something to get you out of your rut and help you explore new possibilities.
So that’s why when you saw a cave by the water, you decided… why not! You were bored, wanted to explore and if something happened, at least you didn’t have to go into work tomorrow.
You were glad you wore your wetsuit when you felt a wave crash against you up to your thighs. The cave didn’t seem to be that big, so you figured you’d take a peak then leave and go eat something warm before going back home and washing your shell collection.
The ground was slippery, so you hugged the wall and moved slowly. You knew you were clumsy, and as you moved further and further into the cave, you were beginning to question yourself.
Why had you gone in there?
No one knew where you were and if you weren’t careful, you could hurt yourself and possibly die. Your body would never be found, and your family would be left wondering where their daughter was for the rest of their lives…
But your mind cleared of these doubts almost instantly when you reached the end of the cave.
It was lit up by glowing plants, perhaps mushrooms growing on the walls. A pool of water, clear and clean was at the end… though the dark side at the end of the pool did spook you a little, you couldn’t help but be captivated by the beauty of it.
Little fish and sea creatures swam and floated in the pool, some bioluminescence. “Aren’t these type of fish usually very deep in the sea? I’ve only seen them in videos…”
You marveled at the creatures, dipping your finger into the pool. Some of them approached, giving your hand a light touch before swimming away.
“Aww…”
They seemed friendly enough, and the water was pretty warm! It made sense, the cave was humid enough.
So this led you to make a mistake. You stepped into the water, sighing in relief as the chill of the October day fade into a pleasant warmth.
But you noticed something… off. While wading through the water, suddenly all of the little creatures began to scurry away and hide. Had you scared them? Now you felt bad…
It hadn’t been you that scared them, though.
You felt eyes on you, a predatory gaze of some hungry creature. You were being measured up…
“… hello?”
You glanced to the dark corner, seeing the water ripple slightly. Suddenly, you saw a pair of yellow eyes, the light reflecting off of them.
“F-fuck!”
You’d heard of salt water crocodiles, they were aggressive and territorial, you certainly didn’t want to be in the water with one!
But within seconds you were pulled under water. Whatever was after you was fast enough to get across the pool of water and pull you under before you could even think.
Just as fast as you were pulled under, you were pulled back up. Something pushed you into the rocky surface of the cave, and your ass felt cold as your wetsuit was torn.
Were you about to be eaten alive? You’d rather drown than feel teeth sink into your flesh and tear you apart!
But instead your legs were being spread, something toying with your hole in an amateurish way as if studying you.
Moments later, your thigh was being lifted up and pulled to the side, rotating you just enough so you could see what had you in its grasp.
The creature had scaly skin, but a humanoid appearance. His teeth were sharp and bared in what almost seemed like an aggressive display, his dark eyes staring down at you with a predatory look.
“Quiet…”
Something rubbed against your cunt, covering you in a sticky, almost gooey slick. “Mine…”
A strange purring sound rumbled in his chest as he rubbed his webbed hand along your belly. “Little mate… watching you for so long… mine…”
You cried out as you were speared with his fat cock, teeth sinking into the sensitive flesh on your neck. It felt sticky and cold, being fucked by this strange merman creature…
“My pretty little thing…”
He had been watching you for months, biding his time until he had you close enough to take, to breed you and keep his pretty little catch all to himself.
Now he was cumming inside, his scaly body rubbing against you as he continued to fuck you through his high. Your warm, gummy walls felt more amazing than he could have ever thought.
And he would never let you go.
After you were nice and exhausted from being bred, he nipped at your through, his long tail swaying in the water as he carried you to a far away island.
No one would find you there, and he could keep you trapped while you grew his young in your soft belly.
——————
NSFW TAGLIST: @sunset-214 @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @unforgettablewhvre @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljra @zyettemoon1800 @exodiam @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @binnieonabike @enchantedsylveon @mysticranger575 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @kittenlover614 @filthybunny420 @annavittoria-mm @makimamybelovedwife @blubearxy @omglovelylaila @toocollectionchaos-universe-blog @fruk-you-usuk-fans @wil10wthetree @hammerhead96-blog @slightlyusedfloormat
#cw dubcon#cw breeding#monstertober#bunni’s monstertober#merman x reader#merman imagines#mermaid x reader#merman x human#merman smut#mermaid x human#mermaid smut#monster fucker#monster lover#monster fudger#monster boyfriend#monster fic#chubby!reader#chubby reader#x reader#fem reader
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𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡, 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞.
┊ count orlok x fem!reader.
✠⠀༷ ゜ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒: intended to be a sacrifice for the strigoi haunting your village, your escape brings you face-to-face with death incarnate.
read part 2 here.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 5.4K.
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: smut, dubious consent (mild hypnosis/dreamlike state), loss of virginity, monsterfucking, vampire antics (scent kink, bloodplay), stockholm syndrome, mild title kink (heavy use of my lord), shadow sex/fingering, female masturbation, voyeurism, extreme possessive/obsessive behavior.
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: this is arguably the most enjoyment I’ve had writing a fic in a long time. I really hope that you love it as much as I loved writing it! any support is greatly appreciated! I would absolutely love to write more Count Orlok after this, for sure!
ICE-LADEN GALES NIPPED AT BARE FLESH, LIKE THE COLD PRICK OF A KNIFE — ONLY TENFOLD. ROPE CHAFED RAGGED AGAINST SOFT SKIN, AND YOUR FEET SEEMED TO CARRY YOU FAR AWAY, INTO THE DESOLATE HILLSIDES OF TRANSYLVANIA.
A sacrifice — a sweet, mourning lamb, given to the butcher, bound together to keep the darkness from devouring your village. That was what you were, some pious creature to be torn apart by a wolf that prowled through shadow.
Only the cruor of a virgin would expunge the evil that lay within the mountains, your blood, offered to the devil.
Many girls had come before you, maidens that willingly succumbed to their fate, screams snuffed out with the trees as their witness. There was not an ounce of subservience within you, no desire to meet your end alone, to become another notch on the post.
Tears stained your cheeks, liquid salt chilled as it settled upon your features, now steeped in dirt as you stumbled through forested wilderness. Winters were dangerous — the biting ice gnawed at your bones, threatening to rip away your extremities.
Before your fellow villagers could put you to the blade, you fled — naked, bitten by frost, alone with only monsters to nip at your heels.
Their desperate cries echoed into the night, the sound of begging — pleading to be spared without their tribute. Groomed to become an inevitable feast for the creature that tormented your village, you could no longer sit idly by and wait to die.
Beneath your breast, your heart clenched, pounding like that of a drum as it howled within your ears. The whiplike scratch of the wind raked across your body, leaving you heaving, fighting against encroaching exhaustion.
In the distance, torchlight grew dim — those who knew of Nosferatu did not dare venture into the woods or the nearby mountainside. Strands of garlic and crucifixes shrouded the borders of your village, superstitions workings to keep the creature at-bay.
Twigs and undergrowth beneath the snow scraped across your feet as you continued to blindly stumble through the forest, emerging onto the other side, where the bridge rested. Beside it, an obelisk — holy relics, strands of garlic, a sign.
‘TURN BACK, OR MEET DEATH’, it read, the script having weathered with the passage of time. The bridge led to a winding path, a path that could only lead to your inevitable demise. Blood began to ooze from your soles, flesh agitated, lips becoming chapped by the wind.
The Carpathian Mountains stood vigil, an impenetrable wall of ancient rock that kept you from the castle that lay between snow-laden peaks. Wisps of snow fluttered from dusky skies, illuminated only by silvery slats of moonlight.
A haze surrounded your vision — exhaustion coupled with the inevitable shroud of frostbite, and yet, something propelled your forward. Respite awaited you in the form of cold earth and maggots if you continued, the spectre of death hovering above you.
With weak steps, you crossed the bridge, hands still bound together, rope having ripped away at the velvety flesh around your wrists. Shadows became listless, alive, as if something moved within the forest, and still, you wandered forth.
There were worse creatures than wolves and bears in the forests, mere fodder to something archaic, an ancient evil feared by your village for decades. Old maids whispered tales of the Castle Orava, home to a den of monsters considered to be servants of the devil, a harbinger of hell.
Foul magic was at-work, they claimed — and yet, you felt drawn for reasons unexplainable. It was as if you were being lured into open waters, dark and treacherous, as black as a bottomless pit. Despite the heaviness of your body, you carried on, bare and blistered.
The path became even, a seemingly-endless stretch of black woodland that broke away to reveal a gate, as ancient as the landscape itself. Even through your blurred vision, shapes danced within darkness, as if they were grinning.
A wheeze of exhaustion bubbled up within your throat, parched and hoarse, flesh beginning to submit to the earth below. You could not recall when you had fallen, crawling toward the gate as if it would be your salvation.
Hoofbeats crackled against the dirt, a distant dream, like the wisp of a memory that soon dissipated — only, it was reality.
Before your body gave way to the blissful kiss of death, a shadow approached, casting its oppressive hand across you. It was veiled by darkness, a presence most enigmatic, something that you hadn’t experienced before.
Nails as sharp as talons ghosted above your satiny flesh, now marred by bruises and by nature’s cruel sting. Your breathing became shallow, strained by a sudden wave of nauseating terror as this shadow swallowed you whole, blanketing you in what you believed to be eternal darkness.
Oh, how you longed for it — for death’s final caress.
Dreams muddled themselves with waking nightmares — and you were trapped, the lamb screaming in the woods, unable to run free. It was the same stretch of dark forest, eyes following you from penumbra, a gloom so dour and terrifying that it rattled your spine.
Running, running, running — it was all you could remember, falling to your knees in the chilled earth, stone biting at your flesh, bones begging for rest. The gleam of torchlight and the shimmer of the blade still haunted you, the executioner preparing to give your blood to protect your village.
In the howl of your terror, the wood seemed to close in around you, like a wrought-iron cage, its thorns drawing blood from your ragged skin. You wanted to scream, to cry out, beg for a savior — and yet, no sound emerged, only ash.
There, in the endless obscurity of a long night, was he — the creature.
Claws that extended from ashen digits reached for you, took hold, and you felt his grasp close in around your throat. No pleas of mercy escaped your tongue, now turned to stone. Death was what you expected in the maw of this shadow — and it never came.
Its hands did not squeeze, with no intent to snuff the air from your lungs. It wasn’t the hold of one desiring death, like that of strangulation, but the embrace of lust. It was unfamiliar — cold, exhilarating, unyielding — and yet, you never wanted anything more.
No visage ever emerged, only the sheen of crimson-stained fangs that sought your breast, the stench of something foul permeating your surroundings. There was no pain — his bite was akin to the caress of a lover, lacking maliciousness, lacking the gnash and tear of a predator.
Hunger — you could feel it burning like an open flame within your throat, his famine. A creature that starved, with an appetite so unorthodox that it was your blood he craved.
With a strangled gasp, you awoke.
Woodlands were exchanged for the frigid, stone interior of an ancient castle, fixtures remarkably old, possessing macabre decor. Your gaze flickered to the ghoulish countenance of a gargoyle hanging above a roaring hearth, heart nearly leaping from your chest.
Whatever dream you awoke from, you could not discern it from reality, a thought that frightened you to no end. Surrounded by the thick, cured hide of a grizzly, you found yourself bare, still lacking a scrap of clothing. The hide was large enough to preserve your modesty, if you had any left.
The rope that had shackled your wrists together was no more, nonexistent — only raw wounds remained. This castle was cursed, a place of horrors beyond your imagination; you could not explain the semblance of reprieve that you felt.
Licks of comforting heat soothed your icy bones, the simmering fire bringing you a semblance of peace, no matter how threadbare. This newfound environment seemed haunted, decrepit — the furnishings were covered in a layer of dust.
It was luxurious, fixtures fit for that of nobility, a lifestyle that eclipsed your own existence back in the village. Now, you belonged to nothing, with no home to return to. Your traitorous actions would be met with punishment, if you were to return.
The floor beneath you was crafted of stone, covered in a layer of dust. Tangles of cobwebs stretched across the mantle above the hearth, roused only by the ghost of a draft that fluttered throughout the room.
Beside the hearth, sat a tub — the gold had tarnished, making it appear dilapidated, as if it were weathered by the elements. Steam rose from the water inside, as still as a silent pond.
A soft groan escaped you, body wracked with the frigid sting of agony, one that made your stomach turn as you approached the bath. It was unusual, the placement — your desire for cleanliness outweighed your skepticism.
Wobbling legs trembled like leaves upon a windswept branch as you sank into steaming water, causing you to hiss at the intrusion against your wounds. The heat did wonders, offering relief from the stab of ice, from the cruelty of the Carpathian cliffsides.
It was still dusk, the hour of the bat, a night that left you with a constant presence of dread. The creature, the man you saw — his shadow had not left you, as if pieces still lingered within your heart as you scrubbed yourself free of grime.
The groan of withered hinges gave way to the weight of the cast-iron doors, adorned with the heads of snarling hounds. Light pooled in from the crack in the door, causing gooseflesh to rake along your spine, followed by a shiver.
Something pulled you — like a puppeteer orchestrating a show, strings that bound you to some medieval presence beyond the doors. The flames within the hearth began to flicker, their light diminishing, waning to little more than smoldering embers.
Fear took root within your heart, its tendrils seizing within you, filling you with a wave of disquiet. Despite the warmth of the water, your flesh screams with an icy chill, throat growing thick as you reached for the bear’s hide.
Shame rippled through you, still bare and exposed beneath the mountain of fur. Firelight illuminated the next room, far more vast than the one you awoke in. Shuffling forward, you grasped at the edge of the door, benumbed iron firm beneath your palm.
A dining hall stretched before you, an ornate table lined with tall chairs that were made from the finest of pelts, yet worn by time. In another lifetime, this castle might’ve been beautiful — instead, it was a mausoleum of the damned.
An ornate candelabra sat atop the table, wisps of smoke drifting from extinguished wicks. A sizable pitcher sat beside a pair of wine glasses, glass contained within some metallic design that twisted around the base.
Two chairs had faced the roaring fireplace, a hearth that dwarfed the size of the one in your quarters. Your footsteps were feather-light as you crossed the threshold, carrying yourself closer to the table.
“Hello?” Whispers to an empty room stirred something within the shadows, accompanied by the garish bark of hounds. Icy dread coalesced within the pit of your stomach as you looked around, fearful of your intrusion.
A door opposite of you opened, moved by a nameless shadow, whose frame eclipsed all slivers of light — an ominous void, as black as pitch. Two hounds snarled at the spectre’s heels, leering through the corridor’s darkness.
Strigoi — the revenant of pestilence, now standing before you. You should’ve been terrified, thrown yourself at its mercy, but instead, you remained petrified where you stood.
For the briefest of moments, your eyes fluttered, and the shadow no longer occupied the space within the hallway. The door slammed shut, the thunderous crack of iron reverberating throughout the room.
The hounds paced forth, growling at you as they settled somewhere along the fringes, laying down alongside scaling stone columns. You swallowed the growing lump within your throat, chewing at the inside of your cheek.
Flames shuddered in the wake of an archaic presence, akin to an icy gale, and with it, the aura of something horribly foreboding. The shadow appeared at the head of the table, each ragged breath evoking a low, guttural growl.
“Sit.”
It was inhuman, his voice — akin to thunder shaking the mountains, like the roll of a dark tide, dragging sailors into its unforgiving seas. He spoke your native tongue, Dacian, and yet it sounded harsher from his lips, wrought with blades.
Through pools of dim firelight, you caught a glimpse of his visage — sharp and pointed, stone-faced and garish. His features, whilst gaunt, possessed all of the markings of a nobleman, attire bearing sigils of royalty, crafted of fine pelts.
With trembling hands, you lowered yourself into your seat, shrouded by the warmth of the grizzly’s hide, ensuring that you were concealed from his view. That pang of hunger you felt in your dream, a ravenous appetite — you could feel it again.
The plate placed before you is nothing more than a generous portion of bread, somewhat stale from constant exposure to acrid air. Your stomach gnashes with hunger, the sting of starvation — you dared not touch it.
“Eat,” His command reverberates throughout the hall, enough to cause a wave of gooseflesh to permeate your skin, dancing along your spine. “Thou shall refer to me as thy lordship.” You had not yet extended your gratitude — he must’ve plucked you from the snow.
Without an ounce of hesitation, your teeth greedily sank into bread, pulling it apart with the fervor of some wild animal. You were not a noblewoman, nor a maiden with any title or dowry — merely the daughter of a carpenter.
“My Lord,” What did one say to a creature that once terrorized your home, to a myth now manifested into flesh? “I — I must thank you, for your hospitality.” Reduced to a mere shrew in his presence, you chewed whatever piece of bread lingered in your mouth.
It was you, his lamb — intended to be his sacrifice, his sated hunger, sparing your village from the terror of his curse.
Another snarl emerged from him, accompanied by each rasp of his breathing, a noise that perplexed you to no end. Strigoi were dangerous — servants of hell itself, creatures born of dark sorcery, ones that had no place in the natural world.
Akin to a mere wisp of shadow, he manifested at your side, pouring a goblet of wine for you, the liquid a dusky crimson. Your gaze never dared to look him in the eyes, feeling the ghost of his finger dance across your cheek.
Such warmth, such feebleness — the beating of your heart only seemed to race with a pang of exhilaration. His flesh was akin to an endless winter, as cold as ice, like roughened leather, decaying beneath the earth.
“Drink.”
Your lips had not tasted wine as lavish as the chalice he presented you with, and it felt saccharine upon your tongue. Greed consumed you, prompting you to drink as if it were your lifeblood.
Long had this castle stood, many centuries of history contained within walls as old as time. A Count, a nobleman he had been in life, a black sorcerer. You, this enchantress, maiden of nothing — you would be his bride, his obsession, his unmaker.
From the rotten gloom of his fortress, he had preyed upon your village for years — years spent in-fear of this serpent, feeding upon the young and old. Blood was blood, and it did not matter the age, so long as his appetite was satiated.
“What do you intend for me?” Your voice was little more than a trembling mewl, expecting to be submitted to dark magics or something far worse. A low grunt stirred within his throat, nail dragging along the curve of your jaw.
With great restraint, his hand recoiled, leaving your warmth as he considered your inquiry in silence. You were intended for him — not as a sacrifice, but as something more, if you were willing.
Centuries spent in his eternal tomb, centuries spent waiting for you — Orlok had crossed oceans of time, wading through endless night to find you.
“Thou must rest — no blade shall find you here.” He rumbled, looming like some dark cloud above your head. It was your scent that drove him to madness, drowned within the concoction of oils placed into the bath. It was a scent he would covet fervently.
A hitch formed within your throat, and your terror had diminished, but only enough to keep you from shaking with dread. You did not understand what he wanted from you, why he did not tear you limb from limb, the fate that had befallen many of your kin.
No blade that wasn’t his own, you pondered, chewing at the inside of your cheek until the flesh was raw. Blood coalesced, sanguine drops attracting the sudden, sharp ire of your host, whose black eyes glittered with bewilderment.
“My Lord, I — I do not understand …” Uncertainty began to permeate your tone, cadence wrought with a newfound fright. Your blood ran cold, heart leaping into your throat as your chest tightened with a great and terrible worry.
“Rest.” His growl ripped through him, reverberating from his chest like the snarl of a feral beast. You skittered from the chair, still swathed in bearskin as you retreated to the room you came from.
Perhaps, he had mistaken your fear as something ungrateful. He had not slaughtered you yet, making you an unwitting guest within his home — you should’ve been offering your gratitude without protest.
The flame within the hearth had dissipated in one fell swoop, as if some storming gale had swept throughout the hall, stealing all light with it. Darkness swallowed your surroundings, and the Count had disappeared entirely, as if he had manifested into shadow.
A shudder coursed along your spine, sending you clamoring into the false comfort of your chambers. The door had shut before you, as if propelled by some unseen force, prompting you to move towards the bed behind you.
Not even the velvet curtains could offer you security, as if they were transparent, or nonexistent. You could still feel the chill of his breath against your cheek, the sensation of his claw tracing along your jaw — you should’ve been repulsed.
Instead of abhorrence, you felt a deep-seated yearning — a blistering desire that you hadn’t experienced before, a tether that anchored you to this being. You feared yourself, the amalgamation of sensations rousing within you as you crawled beneath the sheets.
Sleep would not find you — not here.
Your dreams were no longer yours, bound to him — whatever slumber you could find, you were subject to these visions, lascivious in nature. Whatever rest you could find was disjointed, interrupted by dreams so real that you were convinced of their tangibility, as if you could reach out and touch.
It was him you dreamt of, coming to you at an ungodly hour, claws raking across your bare flesh as he unraveled your sheets. The constant penumbra kept him concealed from you, and yet, you burned to see him fully.
He touched you in your dreams, appearing between your legs as you bared your soul to him, a figure so impossibly large and intimidating. It was guilt and trepidation you should’ve felt, laying with the scourge of your people, a baneful serpent.
Instead, it was euphoria — a desire to bind yourself to him, to cage yourself within his grasp. Spindly digits caressed along your body, nails ghosting above your breasts, traveling to the plane of your stomach.
Unclean — that was what you were, piety now stained in his shadow. Even that did not perturb you as you reached for him, wisps of air being stolen from your lungs as he leaned closer, teeth scraping against your sternum.
“Please,” You had begged him to continue, to bring you a pleasure that you had not yet experienced. “Do not stop.” Whatever pleas fell from your mouth had been for naught — and you awoke with sweat-slick skin and startlement.
As your eyes fluttered open, you were flustered to find the heavy warmth of arousal between your thighs, sheets tangled around your body. Embarrassment turned to frustration, throat dry as you adjusted yourself to the darkness of your chambers.
“Thine body yearns, starved for embrace,” Like the clash of thunder, his voice shook the room, emerging from the pitch surrounding you. You did not know where he was, but he was here with you — physically. “A lamb seeking the shepherd.”
An icy breeze fluttered throughout your quarters, moonlight glistening along the curtains surrounding the bed — and you saw his shadow beside you. Exposed, you drew the sheets around you, with a shame so sharp, and yet your skin gave so easily.
That familiar knot of dread bubbled within your stomach, gooseflesh crawling along your body as you wrapped your arms around you. “I feel your shadow upon me — I should not want you.” You whispered into the gloom.
A growl stirred from the strigoi, and he burrowed into your shame, settling into your bones. “Thine will is your own — it is in your nature,” He rumbled, and that was when you saw him, lingering at the foot of the bed. “Give thyself to me.”
It was your agonizing shame that kept you from crawling to him on all fours like some beast, starving for any scrap of touch. You wanted him, in your own twisted way — wanted him to shield you from your kin, to take you, to live within your ribs.
There was no life left for you in the village — the kin that amassed to put you to the blade, left in the woods for him were not your friends. Perhaps, that was what drove you all along, pushing you into his embrace.
His tendrils wrapped themselves around your mind, no thoughts left untouched, each crevice now surrendered to the Count. He could taste your burning lust, your desire to belong, to belong to him — and he craved such sentiments.
“What little life you had, now belongs to me. Give thyself, willingly — I shall satisfy this craving, and your flesh will be mine alone.”
In the slim fade of silver, you saw him — gaunt and pale, like that of an apparition. In life, he might’ve been called handsome, comely — your disgust should’ve kept you away, made you flee. You were rooted to the bed, able to meet his stare.
Hues as black as pitch, swirling with a hunger unending, an eternal appetite that demanded to be sated by you. He watched you hawkishly, his shadow descending upon you, the phantom sensation of fingers dancing across your collarbone.
Enraptured by the Count, your enticement only seemed to blossom, unfurling from your chest with a wave of want. Instead of hiding yourself from him, you sluggishly allowed the sheets to drop, breasts pebbling from the chilled air.
“I am yours — and only yours, my Lord.”
With a breathy declaration of your devotion, a snarl bubbled from his throat, a sound that sent shivers cascading down your body. Your legs untangled themselves from the sheets altogether, nakedness now exhilarating instead of humiliating.
It was as if you were eased down by some unseen presence, as clawed, shadowed hands bid you to recline into the feathered bed beneath you. The Count did not move from the foot of the frame, leering at you with an ugly obsession.
“Think only of me.”
Whatever supernatural abilities he possessed, he used them, as if you were placed back into the vision you’d had before. His tone rattles your insides, a booming timbre wrought with something dark and enigmatic.
Phantom sensations drift along your body, the touch of another foreign to you. You have used your own hand before, but this feels exhilarating, like a gale of frigid wind ghosting across your frame.
Arousal coalesces between your legs, a slick heat that oozes onto the sheets. It is your scent that vexes him so, the scent of a siren, the call of your sanguine soul.
Without a thought, your hand shyly drifts to your chest, kneading into one of your breasts. Your skin prickles when he makes a sharp, throaty growl of satisfaction. His ghostly claws rake along the supple flesh of your thighs.
A moan escapes you, one of delight as you begin to sink into his presence. For now, he is content to observe, his shadow partaking instead of his physical being — it will not be that way for long.
Soon, your flesh would join — you would become bound to him, and he to you, a union abhorred by many. He reveled at the thought of you, flesh eternal, revealing yourself to him like the unfurling petals of a flower.
No longer shrewd beneath his covetous glower, you freely touch yourself, squeaking out a myriad of sounds from your throat. “Take all of me, beloved.” You exhale, the pad of your thumb flicking across your swollen nipple.
The use of such an intimate title evokes a ragged, strained exhale from your paramour, whose obsession rages like that of a tempest. His phantom claws trace along your body, circling your unattended breast.
It kneads just as you do, sharp talons continuing to tease the pebbled bud, drawing out a mewl from your sweet lips. Gooseflesh erupts across the back of your neck, another wave of arousal flushing through your frame.
A heated ardor burned between your thighs, soon to be soothed by the ghost of gnarled digits. Spectral claws continue to revel in your velvety flesh, seeking your arousal as the shadow traces across your cunt. It makes you writhe, one hand grasping desperately at the sheets.
A strangled whimper emerges from you, back beginning to arch into his salacious embrace. He continues to watch from his place at the foot of the bed, breathing unnaturally hoarse, strained with a wanton need.
Warmth exhumes from you like the lick of an open fire, extinguishing his gravely chill. The Count’s gaze greedily consumes your contorting form, able to hear the erratic beating of your heart, your mouth torn open, his name upon your lips.
No curse had befallen you, save that of devotion.
Phantom digits find the pearl of your cunt, teasing the clutch of nerves before vigorously circling it. Your knees buckle, eyes fluttering shut as you succumbed to such unholy appetites.
“Give in to thine own desires.”
That gravelly purr coaxes you to seek your satisfaction, and you mechanically obey, as if transfixed by his voice alone. A sharp exhale splits your ribs, and the hand that once grasped the sheets soon finds its way between your legs.
An unnatural sheen permeates his black hues, one that seems appeased with your subservience. No dead heart could beat — his skeletal frame had not felt such fervor for centuries.
Again, you look to him, as if wanting him to witness your lust, fingers dancing along your swollen folds. Your digits seek to roll across your slit, eliciting a whine from you as you begin to touch yourself.
Dragging your legs against the sheets, you keep them parted, two fingers sluggishly rutting against your nethers. A phantom hand caresses along your stomach, nails raking from navel to sternum, and then to your throat.
The pressure sends a spike of adrenaline through your body, the sensation unfamiliar, but not unwelcome. You think of him in an untoward manner, unbecoming of a maiden, lascivious fantasies that make you sigh.
Ghostly caresses layer themselves across your chest, and you swear you hear him shift throughout the room, drawing closer to you. Your thumb languidly circles your pearl, teeth gnashing at your lower lip.
A throaty moan rips from your diaphragm, wrought with ecstasy as you pleasure yourself, one palm kneading at your breast. The other is spirited, ministrations laced with desire as your digits find your entrance.
His shadow is oppressive, a force that blankets itself across your body, and for a moment, you see a vision of him, crawling over your flesh. Your thoughts are molded to him, able to be toyed with — your Lord makes you see his own whims.
It became difficult to discern dreams from reality, imagining his hands roaming your form, claws sinking into your flesh, his brand. You call out to him, a whimpering plea that begs him for release.
Arousal mounts, burning heavy within the pit of your stomach as you squirm, pushing two fingers into the tight heat of your cunt. The noises are sinful, a myriad of strained moans intermingled with crass strokes of your digits.
The Count’s phantom hand continues to squeeze at your throat, nails digging into the silken flesh of your neck. A sharp exhale emerges from your lips, toes beginning to curl at the concoction of sensations assaulting your body.
You alone had grown intimately acquainted with your own body, and yet he handled you as if you had been lovers for centuries. Ghostly digits begin to toy with the pearl of your cunt, causing your muscles to twitch.
“Please,” A supplication to the shadows, wanting some release for your overwhelming pleasure. It swarms you from all around, senses invaded with his dominating presence. “My Lord, please!” Your cunt clenches around your fingers.
A growl erupts from the pitch, his gaze fixated upon you as he looms closer, hovering above your writhing frame. The scent of your cruor ensnares him like a wolf to a rabbit, and he finally moves to perch beside you.
His garb only makes him seem impossibly statuesque, hand hovering above you as his sorcery intensifies. Your back arches, feeling his shadow purse around your pearl, enough to make you fist at the sheets.
Ecstatic digits piston themselves in and out of your nethers, coated in a thin layer of slick, thighs shifting together in an attempt to relieve any ounce of friction.
Higher — you climb toward your release, chasing after it with a thinly-veiled desperation. Shadowy sensations move across your body like liquid smoke, squeezing beneath your jaw, continuing to circle around your clit.
You are temptation incarnate — his devotion to you is a powerful thing, just as yours is to him. Sharp, jagged teeth hover above your breast, and the Count succumbs to his hunger, at last.
Pain blossoms throughout your breast, and yet you hadn’t felt an ecstasy quite like this. It was blinding, white-hot as it consumed you whole, swallowing you within the abyss of lust. Teeth break flesh, tasting your cruor upon his tongue.
No drink could compare to that of your sanguine ichor, no sensation — the Count drank from your breast, a possessive snarl ripping through his chest. He bristled at the feeling of your warm palm cupping the nape of his neck.
A crescendo of moans tore through you as you approached your peak, digits continuing to dip inward, curling within your cunt. It became strained, body trembling with an onslaught of ecstasy.
Claws begin to stroke along your tresses, as if easing you into submission, coaxing forth a release that makes you scream. Your body curls toward him, cunt slick with your mess as you find your satisfaction, at last.
A warm rush of your essence soaks the sheets, the scent enough to drive your paramour to madness. It furthers his bloodlust in a way that entices you, another wheezing exhale leaving him.
A rough tongue slithers against your sternum, stained in crimson as he openly feasts from you, and you do not recoil. Your peak seems to work in-tandem with his appetite, feeling his claws ghost above your breast.
Muscles ache with spasmodic twitches, chest flourishing with the sting of agony as it spreads throughout your sternum. Instead, you invite him closer, digits stroking at the greying, decayed flesh, allowing him to sup upon you.
His gravelly voice seems to intensify within the recesses of your mind, speaking to you through a distant haze. “Thine flesh belongs to me,” He rumbles, and you hold him closer. “As this flesh belongs to thee.”
He does not touch you, leaving you with some aching void that can only be filled by him — he alone will satisfy the craving.
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Olympic Chocolate Muffins! (since the recipe is paywalled on WaPo)
Cool the muffins and ganache completely before assembly, about 30-40 minutes
Makes 12 muffins
Muffin Ingredients:
¾ cup (180 ml) whole or reduced fat milk
¼ cup (60 ml) water
2 teaspoons instant coffee powder
½ cup (50 grams) unsweetened cocoa powder
4 tablespoons (56 grams) unsalted butter, cut into pieces
½ cup + 1/3 cup (145 total grams) bittersweet or semisweet chocolate chunks
2 cups (250 grams) AP flour
1 tablespoon baking powser
¼ teaspoon fine salt
½ cup (110 grams) packed dark brown sugar
½ cup (100 grams) granulated sugar
¼ cup (60 ml) neutral oil
2 large eggs, room temp
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/3 cup (60 grams) chopped milk chocolate, plus more for topping
Ganache Ingredients:
2/3 cup (115 grams) bittersweet or semisweet chocolate chunks
½ cup (120 ml) heavy cream
1/8 teaspoon fine salt
Directions
Position rack in the middle of the oven, preheat 400 degrees Fahrenheit. Line a regular sized muffin pan with liners.
In a small saucepan over medium heat, combine milk, water, and instant coffee. Bring to a simmer, whisking occasionally.
Add cocoa powder and whisk.
Decrease heat to low, add ½ cup (85 grams) of the chocolate chunks and butter, whisk until melted and smooth.
Transfer to a large bowl and cool slightly
In a medium bowl, whisk flour, baking powder, and salt.
To chocolate mixture, whisk in brown sugar, granulated sugar, oil, eggs, and vanilla.
Add about 1/3 of the flour mixture, whisk until incorporated
Add remaining flour, folding with a spatula until no streaks remain.
Fold in remaining 1/3 cup (60 grams) chocolate chunks and chopped milk chocolate, until just combined. Do not overmix.
Using a ¼ cup scoop or measuring cup, divide batter among 12 muffin cups, filling to the top of the pan.
Sprinkle additional chocolate chunks on top.
Transfer pan to oven, and immediately reduce oven temperature to 375 degrees Fahrenheit.
Bake for 22-24 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean. Start on ganache now
Let muffins cool in pan for 10 minutes, then use a knife or piping tip to cut an approximately ¾ inch wide hole in the center of each muffin. (use the centers as ice cream topping or eat now!)
Let muffins cool completely.
GANACHE: in a small saucepan over medium-low heat, combine chocolate chunks, heavy cream, and salt. Cook, stirring frequently, until melted and smooth. Remove from heat and let cool completely.
Once muffins and ganache are completely cool, spoon or pipe ganache into the center of the muffin, until slightly overflowed. Serve immediately.
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