#Contempt for A Failed Dimension

[onlyhurtforaminute]

FAITHXTRACTOR=VOMITING PROCLAMATION

[c1qfxugcgy0]

Firstly, I am afraid that the scale of this orbit isn't very intuitive.

Douglas Adams famously said that space is very big. Really big. So mindbogglingly huge that the mind cant grasp it.

So are halo orbits. Here's a diagram of JWST's orbit:

As it says, the dimensions are in km. The circle is the orbit of the moon. To scale, the entire Earth is 2.7 pixels wide.

Along the long axis, JWST's oval is 1.6 million kilometers long. That's 125 Earths. If you wanted to completely fill up the orbital track, but for safety's sake space out each telescope by one Mount Everest you would have room for 340,000 telescopes.

(And that doesn't count just nesting orbits, or sending future telescopes far out of the inner system, which I recommend in the original post...)

Space is empty. There's nothing out there.

Secondly, I have nothing but the utmost contempt for this Green delusion that the natural environment must never be touched. The universe is ours to be used! There's nothing but dead rocks out there! So what if a couple spacecraft fail? What, are they besmirching the nothing? Who cares?

You can argue for preserving land on Earth, where there's an actual functional biosphere, but there's nothing to preserve out there!

[yumenoberu]

Tamaki with a s/o from the Black Magic Club

Tamaki Suoh x gn!reader 

warnings: none!!

published: 11/13/24

author’s note: I’ve been trying to develop this idea for a while but could not (for the life of me) think of a specific scenario for a long-form fic with this setup in mind, so I just decided to write my scattered thoughts as headcanons!! Sorry if its disorganized btw this is basically composed of just my yapping. If you end up liking the idea and have specific scenarios in mind feel free to drop a request 🙏🏻

Tamaki possesses an affable, generally accepting, and even enthusiastic attitude toward things that are unfamiliar to him.

But despite his bearing, it all comes crumbling down at the very thought of the Black Magic Club, Ouran Academy’s fashionable group of occult and gothic enthusiasts. The bunch the Host Club is significantly acquainted with because the former quite literally live within their walls

Due to Tamaki’s natural idiocy, he’s aggravated the Black Magic Club in the past—an unfortunate amount of times. Like when he mistakenly stepped on the Beelzenef, the hooded president Nekozawa’s precious cursed doll, and was made to believe he was banished into another dimension when he took his exams—to name one of many instances.

Falling victim to their wrath left him traumatized. Now whenever their mystic neighbors are concerned, the guy loses all his 5 senses and regresses into a cowering, pitiable toddler

Considering Tamaki’s troubled relations with the group, a romance between him and someone who’s a member would be difficult but of course, never impossible~

Tamaki really strikes me as the perfect candidate for the ‘he fell first and harder’ ‘trope’, especially with this setup

It’d be cute to see him fall for someone even despite fearing their primary interests

It’d likely be a slow start—but it really depends on how his s/o reacts or responds. For his side, he’ll just be doing his best to be open-minded and yet failing to completely embrace it due to his panic.

I can see him willing himself to attend one of their weekly masses but he ends up making a run for the door, his flight senses kicking off in pure terror, as soon as he hears a low-rumbling voice expelled from the distorted speakers.

Just a thought- It’d be kinda cute if s/o was a tease, wouldn’t it? Intentionally or otherwise.

It’s really hard to fault Tamaki though, it’s a world of knowledge completely alien to him. His genuine and loving nature and the legitimate efforts he makes to understand and welcome the occult so he can, in turn, understand and welcome this inherent side of his s/o is something that everyone should admire and s/o should see that!!

Be kind to him T-T ik its fun to tease but there's only so much he can do before he burns himself with the heatwaves of his own love in attempts to accommodate his lover

His acceptance and adaptability will grow alongside his affections, slowly but surely

In due time, I can't particularly see him being immune to all things occult–as squeamish and over-reactive as he is, and I highly doubt he would participate in any sort of black magic activities on his own will

Basically, I imagine Tamaki to be tolerant of it, knowing its something that means a lot to his love, you’ll never find him never going out of his way to strike them down by showing contempt for it; the day he, in his right mind, hurts s/o’s feelings is the day he sends himself into the astral planes

Just hope s/o understands his limits and doesn’t play with his feeble heart too much!

masterlist

[fetznerdeathrecords]

Faithxtractor - Loathing and the Noose

Death Metal from Cincinnati, Ohio, U.S.

Nearing two years since releasing their last album, Contempt for a Failed Dimension, in Jan of 2023, FAITHXTRACTOR are back once again with an even stronger and more expansive effort entitled Loathing & the Noose. From bludgeoning speed to the suffocating weight of expansive doom passages, this album showcases a band that will never stop developing its craft and have proven so on each and every release. Wielding 8 tunes of death & misery, Loathing and the Noose stabs & chokes the listener through its duration. When questioned about the album, mastermind Ash Thomas describes the album as "malice riddled grief". He continues, "From the music to the lyrics it’s a maelstrom of rage & melancholy exploring the many facets of this waking depression called life."

1. Noose of Being 04:49 2. The Loathing 03:32 3. Fever Dream Litanies 03:49 4. Flooded Tombs 04:45 5. Ethos Moribund 04:46 6. Caveats 04:49 7. Beholden to the Nightmare 04:06 8. Cerecloth Vision Veil 06:53

Release date: January 10th, 2025 via @redefining_darkness

@faithxtractor

[swanep0el]

symptoms of narcissism

Red flags are forming:

Suddenly appearing with laser-like attention as if we are soulmates.

Constantly fabricating lies to make you feel close to them - these lies have the mission of establishing a safe bond and making you a reliable narcissistic source (covert narcissists do this).

Example: Hey, I do the same thing as you, we are very similar in intensity. (They idolize you and work as if they are not providing a reliable product.) - They do not respect personal capacity. Narcissists see your limitations as something they must overcome during the process of stopping. If you say you do not eat meat, if you complete this choice, they will offer you 20 varieties of meat to eat instead. They like to be in control. They contain themselves.

After the idealization phase, they quickly approach the dimension and show laser-like attention and you feel like you have your soulmate. In reality, they have conditioned you to be a constant source of supply. This is what is needed to survive. Narcissists do not have self-love. They cannot produce their own structures, they have to get it from others, so you can see them as addicted to attention.

Narcissists love attention, they want to be listened to, they want your time and understanding, they want you to admire their intelligence. Little by little you can see how they start to interact with you as an object. They emit narcissistic signals when they need understanding and attention, and they expect it from you, and they expect you to give them positive attention.

If you confront a narcissist you immediately become an enemy. This is called splitting. Narcissists use splitting all the time. They divide people into two groups. Those who can provide narcissistic resources and those who cannot or do not want to provide. Those who cannot or do not want to provide are worthless and are ignored.

Narcissists may treat you badly when you confront them, you are no longer idealized. When you confront them their fantasies are shattered. They get angry when they see their fantasy resources being destroyed, so they will behave badly. You become the target of their anger.

A good way to understand if someone is a narcissist is to ask them what makes them happy. They will have a hard time answering this question, and you will see that they are making an effort to lie. They may also use this opportunity to lie to you and make themselves more like you.

Another good way to identify a narcissist is by their inconsistency in their behavior towards others. If a low-value person (not a good resource in their eyes) wants to interact with them, they will dismiss them with rudeness and anger. The opposite is true when a high-potential value person approaches.

The tactic of keeping you under control and making it easier for you to fall into their fantasies is gaslighting.

At the same time, people with narcissistic personality disorder have trouble handling anything they view as criticism. They can:

Become impatient or angry when they don't receive special recognition or treatment.

Have major problems interacting with others and easily feel slighted.

React with rage or contempt and try to belittle other people to make themselves appear superior.

Have difficulty managing their emotions and behavior.

Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change.

Withdraw from or avoid situations in which they might fail.

Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection.

Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, humiliation and fear of being exposed as a failure.

So how do I take revenge on a narcissist?

If you think no contact is enough, you are wrong. I say this because you are thinking about this as a NORMAL person. But if you want to win, you have to look at things from a different perspective, a narcissistic perspective. These individuals are ego-driven and their egos are so fragile that it kills them to know that there is nothing in the world they can do to get you to pay attention to them. This may sound 3/10 painful to you (being ignored by a normal person would hurt) but to a narcissist it is hell, probably 10/10. They. Want. Your. Attention. Because it means that you are still somehow affected by them. And it makes them feel good. They want to know that you care, good or bad, as long as you are paying attention, they want it.

Their belief that they can control you makes them feel powerful and dominant.

Don't try to beat them at their game by using YOUR rules. The normal person's revenge logic is to DO something to get revenge on someone. But to get revenge on a narcissist. You should not act according to your normal instinct.

Act like they live for you. Block them. Forever. No contact. Ever.

If you want to win, you have to control your urge for revenge.

You already won because you are a GOOD person. These people are ALREADY LOSERS. They are so shitty that they can't see how shitty they are. Their egos are so big that they are so delusional in their own minds and false beliefs. They think they are so cunning, smart and wonderful that they can hide under their sheepskin and pretend to be a good person and no one knows how bad they are. That's where they are wrong. I have known many narcissists in my life and EVERYONE knows that these people are shitty. No one wants anything to do with them.

But these narcissists DON'T KNOW THAT. They walk around with their giant balloon egos thinking that everyone thinks and thinks they are great, but no one likes them. Yes, there are a few exceptions who are fooled by a narcissist, but I guarantee you that a narcissist cannot wear that mask forever. Everyone will see them for who they are.

God is great and time will tell.

They underestimate the fact that people actually have intuition, brains, and a loving heart, which is something narcissists don't have.

In the meantime, the valuable things you can do are to love yourself, spend time with your friends and loved ones. Pray a lot. Educate yourself about narcissistic dysfunction, and even increase your awareness to protect yourself. ❤

[a-non-ymouswriter]

Naturally, I am Very Interested in hearing literally anything about Remix. But aside from that, the titles of "God's Most Faithful Hater" and "My Son is the Final Boss" are very intriguing!

The later because I read that Webtoon (among many others); the former because I love Tommy angst /and/ religious themes in this fandom can be really fun. There's no telling what direction any given person will go for DSMP gods and thus no telling what new (to me) ideas they might have that I could fall completely in love with.

...And after looking up what CYMK is, I think I'm legally obligated to be curious about "Wandering The Border". Dimension hopping my beloved.

I hope that's not too many? I have so much fun with your stories, it's hard to cut it down from "all of them, please!"

i very much understand, there's a reason why i listed only those when i have a few more dusting away on my shelf lmao. BUT LET'S GET INTO THESE THREE!!

gonna cut this bc it's long

God's Most Faithful Hater - A DSMP Fantasy AU Summary -> Tommy Innit is the most devout, religious, faithful follower Ranboo has ever met. It's hard to believe at first, but everyday without fail, Tommy would pray to XD, hold the silver and green x-cross necklace (the symbol of his religion and his god's crest) whenever he got angry or anxious, and would reprimand Tubbo if he ever jokingly swore by XD or Prime's name.

Ranboo thinks it's nice that Tommy was so faithful to his god, it wasn't for him personally but hey, everyone had something they put their faith into.

Only he finds out that his initial thoughts to be very much, untrue. Well, Tommy is faithful. But he has no love for XD and his religion, no.

He has nothing but contempt and hatred for the malicious God that sunk its divinity into his very soul.

Details and Thoughts -> basically xd cursed tommy to be 'faithful' and be his unwilling follower.

i got this inspiration from Tanya the Evil, both the anime and manga. for those who don't know, it's about a man reincarnated as a little girl in fantasy imperial germany during world war 1 because he was agnostic and 'god' decides that the man needs to be faithful and believe in god. it's a cool anime, i suggest you pick it up.

but i only took 'forced to be religious' from the anime and applied it AND angst to tommy in this au. the more original side of it is that tommy is unwillingly immortal and constantly haunted and 'put to the test' by xd.

those tests are very dangerous, and the only way to get out of them? pray to xd, praise xd and such to save him, the unworthy and unwilling.

of course sometimes tommy can pass those 'tests' or other situations without praying to xd, but as time passes, tommy just ends up praying to xd. mostly after his past adopted family nearly died because he didnt pray to xd. that past family? sbi ofc but thats for later down the line.

the shot would be focused in ranboo's pov in the first part. how he and the others are friends with tommy and talking about how surprisingly religious tommy was. unknowing that tommy kept praying every day for their sake, and to stave off xd's malicious actions.

make no mistake, tho tommy prays and praises xd outwardly, he still fucking hates the damn god. and his internal prayers always, always has him damning xd. which both amuses and annoys said god, but somehow tommy's prayers are at least genuine and stuff, enough that he has to keep his word and not fuck shit up for tommy.

i'd say more but, we need to get to the others lmao.

My Son is the Final Boss - DSMP AU Wilbur-centric Summary-> None Yet

Details and Thoughts -> so this one is very unfinished and was back when techno was alive actually. around then i was reading a webtoon called My Daughter's the Final Boss or something- basically it was about a dad whose daughter, as told by title, became the final boss of a world-ending apocalypse.

it starts w the dad having to confront the daughter that he had abandoned in the past, who grew up terribly and abused and turned into an apocalyptic event boss. The Final Boss. and in that confrontation he...

turns his back on his allies and tries to protect his daughter from them. dying as a result.

but of course, the webtoon continues and the dad is time traveled back to BEFORE he sent his daughter away (he had issues and shit and was an asshole really) so he decides that he was gonna prevent every bad thing that happened to him, his daughter, prevent the death of his daughter's mother, etc etc

so yeah basically that, but with wilbur and fundy. i think i was reading a lot of fundy angst and sbi angst when i thought of it while reading.

i might revisit this shot again, but morph it bc im trying to catch up with QSMP and i love tallulah. and recently read a fic of fundy and tallulah being twins and i just love that. wilbur gets to be angsty over TWO children lol but no promises it's only an idea that hasn't even flourished

Wandering the Border - CMYK AU Dimension Hopping Summary -> Yeah this one doesn't have a summary either sorry

Details and Thoughts -> it says so on the tin; dimension hopping cmyk! EXCEPT

all four of them are dimension hopping separately and are constantly meeting each other... in the wrong order. in different spanning dimensions, and each of them hop dimensions in differing ways.

for example:

T̸̢̧̞̯̠̖̱͖̙͚͎̈́͒̅͑̇̋͐̃͒h̷͙̻̖̞̾̇̂̎̊̀̈̌̏͝ě̶͖̖͂̔͗̿̌̒͗̔̚s̷̛̫͙̤̯̬͕̺͂̐̊̓̐͒̂̕͠e̶̻̓̍̀͋͘û̶̲̾̊͒s̸͓̉͊̇̃̆͛̀͘͝͝ aka Tommy Innit- Chaos Demon currently cursed with dimension hopping because he pranked his dimension's Chaos Demoness Goddess Drista. He cannot stay in one dimension long, pain will overtake his body if he stays for more than a week, sometimes more than a few days or even hours. It's randomized whether or not he can stay or withstand the pain of staying. He is the 'youngest' and 'latest' of the friend group.

Experiment T-U88-Oasis aka Tubbo - A test tube experiment genius, actually the youngest (he's only been alive for 5 years, 3 of them dimension hopping) but technically the oldest in terms of dimension hopping? He always seems to be the one ahead of the curve, meeting others and referencing meet ups that haven't happened yet for the others. Rare instances of other others meeting a younger him that is so unlike the chaotic, hyper Tubbo that they know of. He stole an unfinished experimental device that lets him dimension hop, he keeps fiddling with it, which makes him hop dimensions- or well, it sometimes short circuits on its own and he's gone.

Lethe aka Ranboo - Initially from a superhero universe, Ranboo's powers were mostly about teleportation. Short range, sometimes long range if he could focus and had the stamina for it. He and his superhero mentor ended up busting a villain lair who was messing with powers. Something happened, Ranboo's powers got MAJORLY messed up and he ended up hopping dimensions and losing his memories. He didn't even know his name was Ranboo or his actual superhero name- Tubbo named him Lethe the first time they met, even gave him his trademarked memory journal. Ranboo's powers are unstable, each use has him forgetting all over again, but slowly, over time he doesn't forget. Slowly though.

Purpled - He's a regular teen and mercenary. He does odd jobs, REALLY odd jobs and somehow he's in every dimension all three of them have been to? Second 'eldest' to the group, he's been at this almost as long as Tubbo has. They have no idea how he's dimension hopping and Purpled refuses to answer it straight, not even Tubbo knows how he's going at it and technically he's the oldest! Purpled's the one with the most mystery, he's 'normal'. Fully human with no powers whatsoever, just pure martial skill, however from his travels that he somehow goes on, he has the most stuff. Weapons, items, etc.

so yeah, dimension hopping cmyk :) again i could go on but this has gone long enough.

maybe ask me again if you'd like to know more. or more about the other shots that are dusting away on my shelves. it was really fun talking about this stuff :DD

[tulipq]

You aren't think in the plato-phallic schema hard enough! There is some other dimension where all the idea of man and the idea of woman are (and maybe even some kind of hierarchy that makes one of them (it's going to be men) better than the other). You, by being different, are just failing to be like that thing existing in another dimension. This just makes you not-good and not-useful.

To be clear, I have a lot of contempt for this way of thinking. It is just something that doesn't get pointed out enough because the guy who originates a lot of the notions I am using for this critique is Derrida, and most people think of him as just some kind of insane relativist.

"you're not man enough, not feminine enough"

so gender is something we can fail?

that means gender is not genetic and absolute and unchangeable

but something we can build and perform, and fail at (the standards they set) but also redefine?

if i can fail at being a woman, does that mean i'm not a woman? so does that make me another gender?

[gbhbl]

Album Review: Faithxtractor – Contempt for A Failed Dimension (Redefining Darkness Records)

A brash, no-nonsense blast of guttural death metal, layered with aggressive speed and dark intent.

Contempt For a Failed Dimension is the new album from death metal two-piece, Faithxtractor. It will be released on January 20th, 2023, via Redefining Darkness Records. Having been around since 2005, it’s safe to say that Faithxtractor are confident in their ability to deliver something dark and dangerous. Something made up of eye-watering speed, monstrous intensity, and hellacious heaviness.…

[ghostcultmagazine]

Anareta – Fear Not (Self-Released) Ashen Tomb – Ashen Tomb EP (Personal Records) Atrocity – Okkult III (Massacre Records) Atsuko Chiba – Water, It Feels Like It’s Growing (Mothland) Autumn’s Child – Starflower (Pride & Joy) Barnabas Sky – What Comes To Light (Pride & Joy) Big City – Sunwind Sails (Frontiers stl) Black Star Riders -Wrong Side of Paradise (Earache) Celestial Wizard – Winds Of The Cosmos (Scarlet Records) Cloudy Skies – Chanbges (Argonauta Records) Cthulhu Dreamt – Precursor (Self-Released) Dark Princess – Phoenix (Out Of Line) Deiquisitor – Apotheosis (Extremely Rotten/Night Shroud) Dryad – The Abyssal Plain (Prosthetic Records) Dying Light – Shallow Grave (Self-Released) Eye – Anthology (Pride & Joy) Faithxtractor – Contempt For A Failed Dimension (Redefining Darkness) Fastest Land Animal – East Coast, West Coast, In Between (Self-Released) Fatalismo – Dominate To Exterminate (Self-Released) Gypsy Chief Goliath/End Of Age – Turned To Stone Chapter 7 Split (Ripple Music) Half Life – Like A Jungle (Club Inferno) Heroes And Monsters – Heroes And Monsters (Frontiers stl) Imperium Dekandez – Into Sorrow Evermore (Napalm Records) Issa – Lights Of Japan (Frontiers stl) Katatonia – Sky Void Of Stars (Napalm Records) Laura Cox – Head Above Water (earMusic) Leaflet – Something Beyond (Rockshots Records) The Mighty Mister Shame – Through Hell (Firecum Records) Mindless Hope – Mental Truancy (Sliptrick Records) Natt – Natt (Edged Circle) Negative Vortex – Tomb Absolute (Sentient Ruin) Nothingness – Supraliminal (Everlasting Spew) Pander – Break The Oath (Argonauta Records) Pyramid Mass – Monolith (Ossien Records) Re-Buried – Repulsive Nature (Translation Loss) Riverside – ID.Entity (InsideOut Music) Sarah Halter – The Doom That Binds Us EP (Sparrow Heart) Scarlatamusic – Skatepunk EP (Self-Released) Seether – Disclaimer Re-Release (Craft Recordings) Slegest – Avstand (Dark Essence) Ten – Something Wicked This Way Comes (Frontiers srl) Tension Rising – The Last Judgment (Self-Released) Tidal Wave – The Lord Knows (Ripple Music) Tribunal – The Weight Of Remembrance (20 Buck Spin) Turbid North – The Decline (Self-Released) Twilight Force – At The Heart Of Wintervale (Nuclear Blast Records) U.F.O. – No Heavy Petting Re-Release (Chrysalis) Varjo-Orkesteri – Seremonia (Inverse Records) Walk In Darkness – Leaves Rolling In Time (Beyond The Storm) Shoutout to some good labels: @centurymedia @NuclearBlastRecords @NuclearBlastVEVO @NuclearBlastUSA @bloodblast @RippleMusic @metalassaultLA @uniqueleader @InsideOutReport @napalmrecords @SpinefarmINT @spinefarm @pelagicrecords @MetalvilleTV ​@metalbladerecords ​@metalbladeeurope @HEAVYPSYCHSOUNDSRECORDS @EasyRiderRecords 💻 Omar Cordy (https://www.instagram.com/ojcpics​​) 🎤 Micaela Superstar (https://ift.tt/eN0mhBb) 🎵 Fahad Syed (https://www.instagram.com/fahanzi​​). Gear we use: (These are affiliate links ) Canon 80D - https://amzn.to/3ye8WqV Sigma MC-11 - https://amzn.to/3brZdU2 Sigma 18-35 - https://amzn.to/3tLlEd7 Tokina 11-16 - https://amzn.to/3bty9Uk Feelworld T7 Monitor - https://amzn.to/2Re9hta Audio: Sound Devices MixPre-3 - https://amzn.to/3tKkJd2 Gearlux XLR Mic Cable - 3 Pack - https://amzn.to/3w3zN6Y Deity D3 Microphone - https://amzn.to/3tRa6W2 Fifine Usb Mic - https://amzn.to/3w8JHEG Lighting: YONGNUO YN600L - https://amzn.to/2QkNrn5 YONGNUO YN300 Air - https://amzn.to/2QjN5gu Dfuse Softbox - https://amzn.to/3uQq4AN Aputure MC - https://amzn.to/3oirFgx NanLite PavoTube II 6C - http://bit.ly/NanLitePavoTubeII Lightstands - https://amzn.to/3uSBl3x 5 in 1 Reflector - https://amzn.to/33KHdjo #preview #sneakpreview #newmusicfriday #newmusic #rock #metal #deathmetal #stonerrock #stonerdoom #blackmetal #hardcore #metalcore #symphonicmetal #industrialmetal

[frightknights-n-monstergirls]

That One Song from the Killers - Ex-Partner!You vs Loki (feat. Sylvie) [Part 1]

You were having a great day. You got promoted within your job, a great position with a lot of vacation time, and not to mention a handsome check. You also managed a free drink at your favorite cafe, a $100 from a lotto scratch off, and compliments on your outfit! You couldn't imagine how this day could be bad.

Until a wormhole sucked you into a plain of existence that you had no idea about. Worse still, the one who pulled you into this place was none other than your ex, Loki.

"Hello, darling." Loki grins at you seeing your face drain of color. "It's been a while. How have you been?"

"What do you want, lie-smith?" You spit out practically snarling at the trickster.

Loki laughs nervously playing with his collar. It's now that you notice his attire. He looks like a postal worker who has a uniform too ironed to fit his form properly. You look passed him to see another person, a slender woman who resembles Loki with some variations. She eyes you with contempt, you couldn't help but size her up yourself.

"Um," Loki notices the silent exchange, "This is Sylvie, me from another dimension." You hum in response allowing Loki to continue his story about time, the TVA, another man named Mobius. "Which is why I summoned you here. You are the best in Quantum Physics, you understand this better than Stark." You couldn't help but blush at his comment, he followed up, "We need you help manipulate time on a base level."

"What?" You blanch at him a bit too loudly as Loki tries to pull you into walking with him. You struggle a bit, but start to keep stride with the two Lokis. "It seems like you two have everything you need."

"Yes, but it will be restricted if we don't stop causing disturbances." Loki glances at Sylvie, who scoffs.

"As if I am the one causing them."

Loki shoots her a look, but you see something within his eyes. A softness that you vaguely remember when you two were together. A pang of hurt hollows out your chest. You don't dwell on it too long as they take you to a more secluded room.

"Can you find out how these work?" Loki hands you a device that looks like a remote control.

You turn it in your hands as you study it closely. It looks simple, but you know better at this point to actually judge it without opening it. "I-I'll need time."

"We don't really have that much." Sylvie states glancing from you to Loki fidgeting a little. You gathered that much when they rushed you out of a long empty hallway. Annoyance filled that empty part of your chest, you don't even know this woman and you wanted her dead already. "Loki," She pulls Loki aside a bit of a ways from you.

You glare as they bicker amongst themselves. You watch them fingering the device in your hands like you were still trying to figure it out. What got the worst out of you is when Loki gently touches Sylvie's arm, his thumb caressing lovingly. You fail to notice how hard you gripped the device as it breaks open.

The loud crack gets their attention, you pick at the pieces in your hands noticing some tale-tell components. You've seen some of these things in development from different companies, mainly Stark Industries and OsCorp. You grow more confident in trying to make a end-all-be-all version of this remote.

"You're bleeding." You hear a voice from out of your headspace. You blink taking yourself out of you planning. You see Loki reach out to your injured hand about to use magic to heal you.

You rip your hand away like his touch burned you, "Don't you fucking dare touch me!" Loki looks hurt by your words, his lips pressing together in a hard line, his eyes averting to the ground as he steps back a little.

Sylvie seems to take notice in both your emotions at that moment. You know that she will remember that. She nods to the device, "Can you do it?"

"I cannot say for sure." You murmur taking a coil and a battery out of the device. You let the rest fall from your hands as you inspect the parts you want. "I will need to tinker a bit more. Maybe get a power source more suitable."

Sylvie and Loki look at each other, Loki with a triumphant grin on his face and she cocks an eyebrow. You're chest once again bubbles with something you know is a time bomb. You having to finish this task before you do something you regret.

[frumfrumfroo]

Your answer on fandom conflict was actually helpful and informative. I wasn't trying to "both sides" the issue per se. But from my pov, the resentment/contempt def goes both ways. The difference is one side has more entrenched power/clout (for obvs reasons). And that sucks because I see value in both. Meta is great for enriching your understanding and finding new perspectives. Enjoying lore and "pew pew" doesn't make you a rube. If we could balance/combine them fandom would be a better place.

Oh, glad to hear it!

I do see people being needlessly dismissive of broad subsections fandom as if they're exclusively inhabited by FM dudebros, which isn't cool. And there's nothing wrong with being a lore anorak or with liking spectacle, though I would argue it's still important to understand the story itself if you're going to engage with it actively. The problem comes with people thinking that referencing minutiae is a replacement for plot or with thinking that not caring about story/themes makes you a superior fan because you uncritically accept and celebrate every product with the brand name on it regardless of message or quality. 'True fandom' as knowing every bit of trivia, etc. And 'masculine' fandom tends to fall into that because it is quantifiable, you can compete with other fans and there's a measurable outcome.

Meta and ship fandom does try to have pissing contests, but there can never be any clear winner except in terms of popularity. And you can be the most popular ship without having any basis in canon whatsoever, so that's not much of a 'true fandom' definition. It not being quantifiable gives the whole power struggle an entirely different dimension. To genuinely compete, we'd all have to agree on what the criteria are because we're dealing with something nebulous, and even if we did agree victory would still be a matter of individual judgement.

The sense in which fic/meta fandom tends to be derogatory towards lore/spec fandom is where it has essentially missed the forest for the trees. So you have people who consider themselves superfans of SW but hate and reject redemption and compassion, which is literally what the story is about. But framing this as a problem only ‘masculine’ fandom has fails to acknowledge that there are shippers who are equally uncaring about what the story wants to say and are only here for tropes, dynamics, and images they can appropriate. That there are loads of people writing meta for SW who are so completely missing the point that the point is in another dimension.

To me what needs to happen is for everyone to realise fandom is for fun, it’s not a contest, and however you do it is fine. Even missing the point is your prerogative if that’s what you want to do. The only issue I take is with the hierarchy and the relative treatment different forms of doing fandom receive. And I take issue with people who can’t acknowledge reality. It’s fine to disagree with what a story is saying and decide to read it your own way, but it’s not fine to try to gatekeep and bully the entire world into validating you. It’s not fine to pretend the whole raison d’etre of a narrative doesn’t exist and attack anyone who reminds you it does. It’s not fine to ridicule people who think that it matters and aren’t content with aesthetic trappings.

I’ve hated canon pairings lots of times, but I’m not going to sit  here claiming they weren’t in the text or were actually ‘sibling-coded’ or whatever other nonsense. I’m not going to lie about the thematic content of a text just because I disagree with its conclusions or message. I’m not going to say the essential character of a story, the thing it was created to communicate, doesn’t matter. It’s fiction and we don’t have to take  what we’re given, but at the same time no, not all interpretations are valid. Yes, you can be wrong.

I’ll never tell anyone they have to accept new developments or new instalments they don’t like or that they can’t write their own version of a character, but you do have to acknowledge what the basis of canon actually is if you’re going to play in the sandbox with the other children. You can write whatever fanfic you want, but you can’t demand everyone else cater to you and pretend your version is reality. There’s a big difference between ‘I see what canon is doing but I don’t think it’s done well/I don’t like it/I’d rather it suited xyz preference of mine’ and just… refusing to admit what is front of your eyeballs.

The people angry and threatened by both romance and redemption yelling about how these things have no place in SW are objectively wrong. You can dislike those things and try to minimise them (why not just watch something else? but I digress), but flat out denial they’ve always been central to the narrative and attempting to drive out anyone who mentions them is insanity.

[dramaticviolincrescendo]

The concept of selling your childhood home (which you don’t even live in or provide for anymore) to get money for your own place without giving thought to where everyone else would go, and then describing it as “getting on with our lives” sits wrong with me. It feels like what Fiona did in her final seasons, only rather than distancing from the family for personal ambition, it’s for a new family. I get it: the idea is sound and would work, in theory. But...

What about Liam? Where would he go? He’s a minor. He’s not even in high school yet despite skipping a couple grades. He relies on Carl and Debbie more than anyone else right now, and if they’re scattered, that will be impossible as neither of them make enough to support another dependent.

What about Frank? Where would he go? Sure, they don’t think about Frank a lot (though I wonder if that will change soon), but if you expect Liam to go with him as his father, then Frank will need a place to go. We’ve also seen a general acceptance that he is part of the family and lives with them this season. No one questions him being there, and no one throws him out.

What about Carl? He just started saying how he’s turning the basement into an apartment for himself to make his own space while staying comfortably at home. He started a new career that already put a lot on his plate to think about. Now isn’t the time for him to be hunting for a place too, at least not ideally.

What about Ian and Mickey? They’ve been on a rollercoaster lately, and neither of them have what could be considered stable long-term employment. It was born of monetary necessity and pandemic lack of options. Yeah, the Milkoviches are next door, but the main threat has been neutralized. They don’t have to go, and for the most part, they haven’t discussed it on screen with any regularity to indicate they’re actually looking.

What about Debbie and Franny? Much as Debbie is still using Franny for her own purposes this season, she’s raising her daughter in that house. The utilities are in her name, and she appears to take primary responsibility for their home. The others pay her their shares. Ultimately, no matter whose name is on the deed, Debbie arguably has more say than most of them on what happens to the house because she’s run it for some time. (Not to the extent Fiona did, but overall.)

There’s a fascinating dichotomy here in how Ian/Mickey is a foil for Lip/Tami. Ian and Mickey had to overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles just to be together. Even when they’re at odds on little things, they’re just that—little. They get past it and move on because they love each other, and for once in their lives, that’s enough. They also come from the same socioeconomic background, which means there is no gap in expectations of standard of living to take into consideration. They don’t want vastly different things out of life, unless we count Ian desiring meaningful roles where he can help people while Mickey is content to fly under the radar with schemes of questionable legality.

Lip and Tami don’t have that. They’re the opposite: they had a kid and ended up in a situation where they’re going to be together when, by their own admission at the time, they didn’t love each other. We still haven’t heard them say those words on screen, although their affection has grown and they’re devoted to each other. They also come from very different backgrounds, which has been a sticking point for them at multiple junctures. Lip doesn’t like the expectations and overall aura that Tami’s family exudes, which makes sense. They’re everything that he’s found contemptible since the pilot. Tami doesn’t like the environment on their street or the things that Lip has done for survival or his own pride, which also makes sense. They’re everything the middle class is generally trained to look down on or even fear as where they could end up if they don’t struggle to maintain their position in society.

I think why Lip is struggling is because he’s never really been one for compromise, so if he can’t figure it out on his own and make things “right” in the way he deems most appropriate, then he feels like he failed. He alludes to that in the garage, and where Mickey was able to navigate Ian’s feelings to support but provoke into action earlier this season when he felt similarly, Lip and Tami don’t have that same dimension yet. She was absolutely right in saying that he fixed nothing because he could go to prison. He needed to hear it because what he did was wrong and stupid. But the support wasn’t really there. Meeting on common ground wasn’t there because they aren’t there yet on the big things, as we’ve seen over and over. With the house in s10, Tami was the one who settled for what Lip wanted to do. This time around, Lip refuses to settle for what she wants to do, even knowing that part of it has to do with helping her dad keep their house too and would definitely benefit everyone monetarily despite the unfortunate nature of the atmosphere.

So, now he’s come up with an idea that he thinks would make her happy and “fix” their situation, only it means driving a wedge into the family because even if some of them agree, this won’t be unanimous and it means taking away their home so they have to scramble to find something else. Yes, Ian and Mickey had thrown around the idea of getting their own place as a married couple, but they’re the only ones. Carl is comfortable at home. Debbie and Franny are. Liam and Frank are. That’s five people being ousted who had no intention of leaving before.

I understand where Lip is coming from and am fascinated to see what the outcome will be, especially considering what they are not yet aware of regarding Frank. But I don’t think he’s making the right decision, at least not for the right reasons or with the right amount of forethought regarding how this will impact his siblings.

[sirowsky]

The Flowers Always Know

Description: When a mad scientist uses you as an experiment while you’re on holiday, the Heroics only just manage to save you. And in your recovery you become very close to the leader of the group. (Slow burn)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Language, kidnapping, torture (not the gory kind), angst, buried trauma.

Link to Masterlist

Comment: You have a woman that seriously hurt you, at your mercy, and you’re struggling with how far to take it. Meanwhile, Marcus realises he’s going to have to save you from yourself, if he can find you in time.

Chapter 43

  You waited for her to wake up for almost thirty minutes, and that was after you’d taken her to the abandoned warehouse, and secured her to a solid metal post that used to connect the floor to the ceiling. You didn’t know exactly what kind of tranquilizer Tech had used, but it sure was potent.   Her feet were still tied together and you’d placed her on her knees with her back to the post. Her arms were strung up above her head on either side of the post, and secured individually, to ensure she couldn’t use either hand to untie the other.   Her head hung low between her shoulders and her body seemed completely limp. If not for her slow and even breathing, you’d have thought she was already dead.

***

  After your phone had gone to voicemail for the third time, Marcus lost it.   He’d been working on dismantling the containers, no longer needed, while he waited for Aidan to finish his task, and for you to call him. He didn’t do well with idle hands when he was worried about something, and there was so much at stake right now.   Then his phone had beeped, and as he’d read the message, his blood had turned to ice. He’d immediately tried calling you back, but he was routed straight to your recorded voice declaring that you were indisposed at the moment.   Desperate to believe that you wouldn’t do this, that you weren’t cruel enough to do what his mind was telling him were the only reasons you would have taken off with the believed head of the entire organisation you were trying to bring down, he tried again.   The third time was just dumb, but he really was losing it.   He ran back to Tech.

  “I need you to track my wife, right now! Her phone, car, fucking watch – anything!”

  “What? Why? What’s going on?”

  “She took off with Kane, we have to find her before she does something she can’t come back from.”

  “She wouldn’t do that, Marcus. She started all of this because she wants the pain and deaths to stop. She’s a good person.”

  “Yes, she is. But Kane very nearly killed our baby, and as much as I hope that she’s strong enough to resist, I know that the mother in her is the most powerful part of her, and she’s gonna wanna hurt Kane. Even if she doesn’t kill her, she might still torture her, and I can’t let her do that. It would never stop haunting her, specifically because she is a good person. Please, Tech.”

  “Okay, okay. Let me see what I can find.”

  Marcus was beside himself with worry, and his mind was grasping at anything it could to distract itself, while there was nothing he could do but wait.

  “Where are we with the operation?”

  Tech answered him at the same time as he typed impossibly fast on his laptop, and various windows were popping up and disappearing on the screen.

  “Only six more cities left to confirm completion. All the others have been successful.”

  “I’ll check on the kid.”

  He walked over to where Aidan sat on the same spot in the grass. The boy was pale and bathing in cold sweat, breathing hard and visibly trembling with the effort it had taken out of him. With so few locations left, he had been able to let go of most of the birds, but he was exhausted and still had hundreds of birds left to direct for a while yet.   Marcus knew that Aidan’s fate mattered to you, and it did to him as well, so he sat down next to him, and put his arm over the kid’s shoulders. He just wanted to convey that he was there and that he cared, and Aidan seemed to feel it, because his discomfort lessened a bit.

  “I found the car!”

  Tech’s voice reached him from across the field, and he got up, but not before whispering ‘hang in there, kid’ to the boy. Then he sprinted back to his friend’s station.

  “Tell me.”

  “I don’t know what the hell she did with her phone, but I can’t see it at all. I had to break into her car’s emergency alert system, and trick it into believing there’d been an accident, to get it to reveal the coordinates. It’s parked on a street on the edge of a warehouse district, but she could be in any one of a hundred different abandoned structures on that lot.”

  “Just send me those coordinates, I’ll find her.”

  ***

  When she finally did wake up, you felt oddly calm. As though something inside you relished the thought that she was about to wake up to a real-life nightmare. Somewhere deep inside, you knew that you should be disgusted with yourself for reacting like that, but your hatred towards this woman was clouding your mind, and darkening your heart. But just knowing that wasn’t enough to make you wanna stop.    Her head twitched first, and then her hands, as she tried to move against her restraints. When she realised that she was unable to, she tried to lift her head, but she was still groggy, and her nerves weren’t responding normally, resulting in a clumsy few bobs of her head before she managed to draw it back to rest against the post.   She was still too groggy to speak, but you saw the recognition in her eyes when they fell on you, and there was surprise in there as well, which pleased you more than it should have.

  “Hi. I’d say it’s good to see you, Emily, but it just isn’t. I don’t even know what to say to you yet. I’ve been sitting here for half an hour thinking about what I wanna say… or just do, to you, and I still don’t know. But we have time. I’m sure I’ll figure it out.”

  “You… have no.. idea… what… you’re doing.”

  “And why is that? Because you experiment on people against their will, and have no problems with being complicit to mass-murder, if not committing it yourself? Or is it because you’re the leader of a covert organisation of hundreds of agents that do all of that on your behest?”

  She was regaining control of her body, and you could see the contempt in her face as it dawned on her just how much you’d already figured out.

  “How?”

  Her tone was demanding and arrogant, and as the façade of the benign doctor fell away, you didn’t even recognise her face anymore.

  “You told me. Through my subconscious. Word of advice: if you’re gonna give people powers, having no idea what they might turn out to be, don’t show them your fucking face.”

  “Those memories... were removed. The super who took them… he never fails.”

  “He left behind just enough that my powers could recreate a single image for me. But that was enough.”

  “Well, congratulations, you figured it out. You’ll never stop us; our organisation has grown exponentially.”

  “The Society of Inferiority Complex, yeah, we know.”

  “How mature…”

  “An acronym that spelled SIC (sick) was just too appropriate to pass up.”

  “I don’t give a fuck what you call us. Before long, you’ll be introduced into a world where everyone is just as powerful as you. You won’t be so smug then.”

  You got up from the crate you’d been sitting on, and stepped right up to her so you could squat down and face her at eye-level, mere inches away from her.

  “Tonight, hundreds of our operatives have kidnapped hundreds of yours, just like I did with you. We’ve been monitoring your activities for months, mapping your movements, documenting your labs and temporary offices all over the world. You never even knew how many supers live covert lives in today’s society, did you? Well, we found hundreds of them, and after hearing what you did to me, and to those children, they all volunteered to help us. Your own actions created an army of superpowered people hellbent on destroying you. Did you really think you’d be able to beat us? All you’ve done is unite us.”

  “Aren’t you clever, little Rainbow. But, tell me… If you’re such a good girl – why’d you bring me out here? All alone. Where no one can hear us.”

  You pulled back just a few inches, but her question only managed to wake all the anger inside you back to roaring life. If she really wanted to know the answer, you’d happily show her.

  “Because you tried to kill my baby.”

  You dropped all pretence, and allowed your powers to flare freely. The concrete under your feet snapped and cracked, sending long trailing crevices through the floor. Time and erosion had created flaws from underneath, that meant that large sections dropped several inches in some places, sending thunderous rumbles through the whole area. But you didn’t care.   Ordinarily, your mind automatically shielded anything living, standing in your vicinity, when you flooded this dimension with the denser energy of the others that you had access to. Otherwise, you’d destroy every living cell around you by forcibly compressing them until they were crushed. And, ordinarily, that wasn’t something you wanted to be responsible for.   But not this time.   You merely sat there, hands clenched into fists, staring at her, seeing only those eyes that had looked at you with such fondness while you worked with her. Those eyes that had fooled you so completely. You wanted to rip them out of her head.

  “Good show. But we both know you don’t have what it takes to…”

  Your stillness was an illusion. You were slowly gathering an increasing amount of energy into the air around her, and as the space got more and more crowded, her whole body was slowly being crushed.   She fell silent mid-sentence when she realised that your stare was in no way harmless, and a minute later, the first scream escaped her.

***

  The car was unlocked when Marcus got to it. The keys were still in the ignition, and on the front passenger-seat he found a contorted piece of metal and plastic and glass that had probably been your phone. All the materials had melded together as you’d forced them to compact more than they were actually structurally able to.   That was a bad sign, if he’d ever seen one.   There was nothing else in or around the car that could indicate which way you’d taken your prisoner, and the odds that you’d have stayed close enough to be able to hear him if he shouted for you from there, were non-existent.   Using his current, he tried to sense your energy, and was almost startled at how strong a trail he discovered. But, of course, he should’ve known that you’d use your ghost hands to move Kane, to prevent leaving marks on the ground, as well as make it easier for yourself.   He started following the signature of your powers, so familiar to him by now, and it led him into the very heart of the labyrinth of old run-down buildings and factories.   But when he got to a certain point, the energy suddenly quadrupled, snaking off in four different directions.

  “Oh, for god’s sake, woman… Give me a chance, at least.”

  A terrifyingly loud rumbling, accompanied by what very well could’ve been an earthquake, but wasn’t, came from his left, and without hesitating he ran towards it.   The ground was split open and uneven and half-collapsed buildings lined the roads that he followed to get to you. But he still had to run for hundreds of yards until he reached the structure that it seemed to be coming from, based on the directions of the cracks under his feet.   Realising how far you’d allowed your energy to reach, he was once again amazed at just how powerful you were, but also petrified that it might mean he was already too late.   As he made his way inside the lightly trembling warehouse, he heard blood-curdling screams coming from somewhere inside, and his heart fell. But if she was screaming, she was still alive, which meant he still had time.   When he got to the right place, it was like walking into a nightmare.   There was no ceiling above you and no lights were working, leaving the room basking in nothing but the pale and ghostly moonlight. You’d somehow twisted the whole room so that nothing was straight anymore. Posts and beams and even the walls, were all bent or curved or twisted around themselves or something else. The ground had risen in some places, and fallen in others.   It felt like he was walking into a physical representation of what your mind looked like right now. And in a way, he supposed it was.   Kane was still alive, but whatever you were doing to her was painful to the extent that she was shaking uncontrollably against her restraints, pleading like a child for you to stop, in between fits of vomiting and convulsing.   And you were so calm. So viciously calm it was heart-breaking to him. You just sat in front of her, one knee resting on the ground, the other under your elbow, watching her as though you were a cliff and she was the ocean, thrashing against you with all her might, but unable to move your solid frame even a single inch.   If he hadn’t known how much this was actually hurting you, he might’ve found it fascinating. But he knew you so well that all he could see, was his beloved wife being destroyed.

***

  “Hermosa.”

  His voice came to you like a butterfly against a hurricane. Like soft whispers carried on those wings, so faint, but still able to drown out that howling wind in your ears.   Your eyes automatically turned to find his, and the pain that was already overwhelming your heart, seemed to double.   This wasn’t who you were, you knew that. Every fibre of your being knew that, but you’d forced them into silence with your anger. Used your pain as a shield against all those voices telling you to stop.   But Marcus… seeing him look at you with that much fear…   Not the fears you’d seen before, when he’d thought he was losing you, or when you were injured or being threatened, or the fear that you wouldn’t love him anymore after he walked away from you.   No, this time he wasn’t afraid for you – he was afraid of you. Of just what you were capable of, how far you were willing to go, how much darkness you were willing to let into your heart to try and be free of the pain that festered in there.   Your powers were draining you fast. You’d made no attempt to hold them back at all, and if you stopped now, all that exhaustion would come crashing over you, and you’d be unable to finish what you’d started.   But what had you started? What was it you were hoping to achieve here? You’d wanted to hear her scream, and you had. You’d wanted to hurt her like she hurt you, and you had. But did you want her to die? Were you willing to become a murderer just so that you didn’t have to see the falseness of her face ever again?   Confused, but no less angry, you forced your gaze away from your husband, and refocused on Kane, pulling even more energy out to thicken around her until one of her shoulders was pushed out of alignment with the amount of force bearing down on her.   The harsh popping sound was loud enough to reach Marcus’ ears, and her resulting scream made him close the distance between you, while he started begging you to stop.

  “Please… this is wrong, you know that, mi amor.”

  “You know, I remember thinking that if there had just been someone there to stop my torturer, I could’ve been spared so much pain and fear. And then I found out someone was there, but she did nothing to help me. She just watched and enjoyed the show. So, why should I treat her any better? Why should she be spared that pain?”

  Your energy already filled the room, and half the damned district, so when the images started appearing, they didn’t just show up around you, they flooded the whole area. Every memory you had of every moment that had hurt you, throughout your whole life.   There were hundreds of them.

  “The tears I’ve shed could build a lake. Tell me what I’ve done to deserve that. How could anyone do anything bad enough to deserve all of this?”

  “You’ve done nothing wrong, hermosa. Life just doesn’t work like that.”

  “Then I should at least get to avenge myself!”

  Her other shoulder popped, and she squealed and wailed until her voice gave up and she just sobbed instead.   Marcus moved even closer, just a few yards away from you now.

  “You should. You should get to avenge all the terrible things that have been done to you, but you never can. All you can do, is hurt yourself instead. I know you’re forcing yourself not to feel it right now, but this hurts you. You want it to feel good, to make you feel better, but it won’t, because you’re a good person. You are a good person, hermosa. That’s why I married you, that’s why you’re carrying my child, and that’s why my daughter loves you.”

  Missy. Fuck. Why’d he have to mention her?

  “Please, sweetheart. Don’t make me watch you destroy yourself. I already lost one wife… I need you to let me keep you.”

  His voice was so frail by the end of that sentence that you feared a mere breath might break it apart. And yet, his words held so much power. They forced their way under your skin, cooling your blood and pushing the anger out.   But the pain was still just as strong.   Desperate to get rid of it, to be free of everything that haunted you, you collapsed on the ground, and enormous quantities of your sparkling dust poured out of you, flooding the room in every direction, flowing unhindered through all that energy that you’d pumped into it.   The images were still there, snapshots of the worst moments of your life, the one’s that caused you more pain than you could ever voice, and you wished that you could make them solid. That you could pull them out of yourself completely and leave them behind in that room.   The dust pulled the images apart, turning them into three-dimensional representations of themselves, while you watched, actually seeing the magic happen for the first time.   When the sculptures were finished, they solidified, just like before.   A single tear escaped your left eye as you saw your very worst memories turned into some sort of bizarre museum-exhibit all around you. It rolled swiftly down your cheek, and with the way you were sitting, it should’ve hit the top of your left hand, holding you up from the ground. But it never landed.   Instead, it hovered mid-air for a few seconds, before splitting into dozens of smaller drops, that each flew away to one of the sculptures. And as the drops made contact with them, the sculptures turned to stone. Transparent, and still sparkling in every colour on the spectrum, but unmistakably more solid than just the dust.   Once again, your powers had tried to give you what you asked for, what you needed the most. If only the memories could’ve been trapped inside those statues as well. If only you actually could get up, walk away and leave them behind forever.   Strong arms encircled you as Marcus pulled you off the ground and into his chest, and you finally gave in. Now that you allowed yourself to feel it, you were completely spent. You wanted to say something to him, but he didn’t need an explanation, he understood everything, you knew that.

  “Marcus… I’m sorry…”

  He just kissed your forehead and held you closer, but if he said anything, you passed out before you could hear what it was.

Author’s Note: As always, I love criticism, please don’t be shy to let me know if there’s anything you like/don’t like/have questions about.

@allmyspideys​​ @blueeyesatnight​ @hrk-fic-recs​ @strawberryperegrine​ @lucrezia-thoughts​ @computeringturtle​ @sarahjkl82-blog​ @giselatropicana​ @ayamenimthiriel

[turtlethon]

"The Incredible Shrinking Turtles"

Season 2, Episode 2

First US Airdate: October 8, 1988 First UK Airdate (TMHT): January 10, 1990

Shredder uses an alien crystal to downsize New York landmarks - and the Turtles.

The second season of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is somewhat different than the one that preceded it and the season after. It begins with an episode that helps re-establish the status quo for this year ("Return of the Shredder") and ends by shaking things up again ("Return of the Technodrome"). The remaining outings from this season can be split into two distinct runs. S02E02 through S02E05 form the Eye of Sarnath arc and have a loose continuing storyline throughout. From S02E06 to S02E12 we get self-contained tales, often with a horror B-movie vibe.

All of this is a long way of saying that the next couple of episodes - The Eye of Sarnath Arc - are a trial to get through. This is very much the definition of a filler arc, adding nothing of value to the series or its mythos, but I'm going to persevere and try to see if there's anything here worth writing about. Notably, "The Incredible Shrinking Turtles" is the first episode not credited to David Wise in some fashion, and he won't return until season 3's "The Maltese Hamster".

This episode opens with the Turtles in the middle of a training exercise. Some of the visuals in this sequence will be burned into the memories of viewers of Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles, as they were used as "fill-in" clips in place of the supposedly objectionable scenes in the Ninja Turtles opening. They make no sense in the wider context of the series - particularly glaring is the use of Michelangelo dressed in a shoddy Shredder costume.

The Turtles witness an alien spacecraft crash nearby - very convenient that it should happen to land in the laps of our heroes, but whatever - and rescue its passenger. He tells them that they need to collect the fragments of the Macguffin to end all Macguffins, The Eye of Sarnath, and that whoever should possess all the parts of the eye would become incredibly powerful. The alien gives them a tracker to help them find the fragments, then disintegrates before anyone can ask any follow-up questions.

The real Shredder is watching the Turtles from the bushes nearby - which seems kind of pathetic considering he supposedly used to have a network of spy cameras he used to track Splinter - and upon overhearing all of this naturally wants to find the pieces.

Contacting Krang in Dimension X, Shredder stresses his need for Foot Soldiers, but his demands fall on deaf ears. Krang is decidedly unimpressed with Saki throughout this episode, and so Shredder goes out of his way throughout this story to prove his worth.

It must be said though that we're only two episodes into the second season and already Shredder's credibility as a villain is beginning to crumble. He can't even get through a conversation with Krang without ending up covered in Baxter's ice cream.

The Turtles reluctantly rustle through some trash to find the first fragment of the Eye of Sarnath, but Shredder is spying on them again. He quickly defeats them once more, in a fight scene that I'm pretty sure we only saw half of in the Hero Turtles edit.

The upside of Shredder being less overtly evil is he's free to do more goofy one-liners.

Armed with the first Sarnath fragment, Shredder uses it on the Turtles, causing them to shrink (yes, we're doing THAT trope). Forced to flee, they evade the various dangers of the city and eventually make it back to the sewer, where they meet up with Splinter.

Meanwhile Shredder is shrinking New York landmarks, including the Empire State Building. Somehow only the buildings shrink, not the people or presumably the contents. I can't figure out the logistics behind this and it's probably best that I don't try.

Splinter and April are driving around in the Turtle van, and so the Turtles are left to their own devices in the sewers. They end up going toe-to-toe with various foes, including a sewer snake, before being flushed into a river.

Back at (checks notes...) "H Cheese Co.", Shredder unsuccessfully attempts to impress Krang with his collection of tiny buildings.

"What is this? A centre for ANTS?"

Krang demands that Shredder find the Turtles. Fortunately, Baxter has built a turtle tracking device and uses it to catch them, sparing them the fate of being swallowed by a particularly vicious fish.

Splinter knows the Turtles aren't in the sewer though, because he has Sensei Senses. I wish I was making this up.

At the cheese factory, Shredder is about to squash the tiny Turtles with a crowbar - a particularly gruesome way to go - when Splinter crashes through the door in the Turtle van.

Splinter pretty much wipes the floor with Shredder, only very briefly losing the upper hand, while April uses the eye fragment on the Turtles a second time. The theory here is that if one dose shrunk them, surely a second dose will revert them to their normal size. Nobody ever stops to wonder if it would actually disintegrate them completely, but of course as it turns out that's not a problem, and moments later the Turtles are their regular selves again.

Shredder gets a fleeting quasi-win by escaping with the first fragment. When Leonardo suggests they've failed him, Splinter kinda dickishly suggests "Yeah well, you'll know better next time, won't you".

Back at the lair, we get the already obligatory pizza gag finish. Splinter has ordered tiny meals for his pupils "to remind them they still have a long way to grow". They all stare daggers at him, and for once I can't blame them.

I can't really hide my contempt for this arc, and after re-watching this episode my stance hasn't changed. The shrinking trope had been done a million times even by 1988 and in general it feels like we're spinning our wheels. Next time, the Turtles will take on a big plant. Will that turn the Eye of Sarnath storyline around? We'll find out next time, as Turtlethon continues!

[kimjoongs]

Where We Went Wrong ; Ateez Diary Film Series

For them, it was easier to pretend that nothing was wrong, it was easier to ignore their problems rather than face them head on. Together, they were the happiness surrounded by sadness. Apart, they were the sadness surrounded by happiness. Eight stories. Eight beginnings. One ending.

disclaimer: this series contains no romance whatsoever and is centered around the members and their interactions with each other as seen in the diary film. *links will be added as stories are posted*

I. INTRODUCTION - MEMBERS’ LOGS

II. MEMBERS’ FILMS

faded dreams and forgotten memories - p.sh

— Like shattered pieces of a mirror, Seonghwa was broken; he was lost. with nothing else to go by but an abandoned bracelet and a lingering scent of someone familiar, he spent his time wandering. His feet took him down the path which connected his dreams to his reality, unaware of the fact that they were one and the same. He racked his brain for something to hold onto– a memory perhaps, and was surprised to see that memory appear in the flesh. Seonghwa was lost, until he wasn’t.

➤ listen to | falling apart by michael schulte ✐ read here | faded dreams and forgotten memories

have mercy on me - j.yh

— Yunho was loving and compassionate– an absolute gem to anyone who’s ever had the pleasure of being in his presence. He was a dreamer, a believer in all things whimsical and wondrous. Yunho supported everyone’s endeavours, especially his older brother’s. But then a single moment came in and changed Yunho’s life for the worst– tearing the love and compassion right out of him, leaving behind a hollow shell of what once was in its wake.

➤ listen to | i’ll still have me by cyn ✐ read here | have mercy on me

what do you do with false hope? - k.ys

— Yeosang’s followed a roadmap his entire life, venturing to places his parents never had the chance to. His routine was strict and to the point, not a single detail out of place. Except for one. What Yeosang’s parents failed to take into consideration was that their son was a free spirit, and keeping him on the beaten path would only do more harm than good. Yeosang knew that too, which was why he decided to ditch the road map and follow the stars instead.

➤ listen to | mercury by sleeping at last ✐ read here | what do you do with false hope?

unspoken promises - c.s

— San can count on two hands the amount of times he’s moved houses. A cycle of packing and unpacking, making friends just to leave them a few months later– he was sick of it. He craved permanency. San didn’t belong anywhere or with anyone, and he thought it was about time for a change. All he had with him were the clothes on his back and a note with an address scrawled onto it.

➤ listen to | always by by the coast ✐ read here | unspoken promises

don’t let it slip through your fingers - s.mg

— Dreams were a luxury that Mingi couldn’t afford. For years, he lived off the idea that he was simply meant to live his life with no purpose. What use did a spiritless boy have in a world filled with dreamers and chasers? Mingi was content with waking up, going to school, coming back, and repeating it all the next day. Dreams were a luxury that Mingi couldn’t afford, but it didn’t mean that having one would cost him anything.

➤ listen to | feel something by jaymes young ✐ read here | don’t let it slip through your fingers

to be alone in this world - j.wy

— Bogged down by the desire for acceptance, Wooyoung was a force to be reckoned with– a blazing inferno wreaking havoc both interiorly and exteriorly. His choices were more so impulsive rather than premeditated, and they only served to further fuel the fire in his eyes and the determination in his fingertips. But like all uncontrollable flames, it was only a matter of time before something came in and extinguished it.

➤ listen to | blue by keshi ✐ read here | to be alone in this world

just one more chance -c.jh

— It was all right there in front of him. But due to the lack of consideration for himself and his surroundings, he lost everything. The people around him showered him in words of encouragement, but instead of gaining strength from those words, Jongho’s contempt and deep-rooted self-doubt continued to grow. He was a prisoner, locked up in the confines of his own mind, secretely wishing there was someone or something that would break him out.

➤ listen to | days gone quiet by lewis capaldi ✐ read here | just one more chance

where did i go wrong? - k.hj

— Hongjoong played a critical role in the game called Life. He switched back and forth between two dimensions: dreams and reality. In his dreams, he witnessed despair and tragedy. In his reality, he also witnessed despair and tragedy. The only difference between the two, was that Hongjoong’s reality was covered in hope; hope that he would one day recover those who had given themselves up to the darkest parts of their overworked hearts.

➤ listen to | are you with me by nilu ✐ read here | where did i go wrong?

III. CONCLUSION - MEMBERS’ LOGS

[dwellordream]

“...That young people had a predilection to join or embrace new heresies is to some extent uncontested. Protestantism in its early phase made headway in university circles, and the audience for lectures by young masters were undergraduates, adolescents aged between 14 and 18. Among London apprentices, new religious ideas were probably disseminated with relative ease as well.' But there are difficulties in gauging the precise dimensions and significance of this phenomenon. Conversion to Protestantism was by no means an experience exclusive to the young; some of the leaders and most ardent followers of the early Protestants were in their thirties when they converted to Protestantism.

Moreover, it is impossible to know the precise age structure of either the first generation of Protestants, or any other religious group in the sixteenth or seventeenth century. If we include people in their mid- and late twenties among those described by contemporaries as 'young', it is hardly surprising that the young were the most likely converts to any religious doctrine - what appeared to contemporaries as a predominance of youths among these groups may have been no more than a reflection of the fact that the majority of the population in this period was under 30 years old.

…And despite occasional references to religious meetings designed especially for young people, there is no evidence that there were permanent associations exclusive to the young. Most other accounts of the sermons, preaching and gatherings in which writers of autobiographies took part suggest a lack of age segregation. Piety, religious observation and fraternity based on doctrinal persuasion appear to have transcended age differences and even to have cemented ties with adults rather than with peers and other youths.

…The descriptions of the profanity and sins of the playmates and young companions of these autobiographers accord well with the complaints of moralists, magistrates and clergymen about servants, apprentices and 'idle boys', who 'spen[t] much time in playing', swearing, cursing and disturbing the peace, and who passed their Sundays playing games in the churchyard and disturbing the preachers in their sermons. Patrick Collinson pointed out that preachers also accused ballad-singers of seducing the youth of the parish out of church and into the Sunday dances. 

And S.J. Wright has shown that attempts to compel the young to practise their religious duties in the post-Reformation period were dilatory: many people escaped confirmation, and the enforcement of the duties to catechise children and of legislation regarding first communion varied considerably from place to place and over time. People over 14 years of age were required by law to attend morning and evening prayers, but this was enforced haphazardly at best. 

Martin Ingram has also shown that the mobility of servants placed great limits on the ability of the church courts to enforce legislation on major sexual offences, such as fornication and bearing illegitimate children. He has established that those guilty of such offences were for the most part young, unmarried, and often in service, and some of them cared little about spiritual courts, sin, damnation or hell. Youth may well have been the stage in the life cycle when official religion had the least impact.

Yet it is doubtful that this in itself fostered the emergence of a youth culture based on distinct religious sentiments or values. Conduct books and books of advice and instruction for the 'pious prentice', 'youth' and 'young men and maidens' were sometimes purchased by adolescents and youths; and while many youngsters consumed chapbooks of romance and adventure, others must have bought the godly chapbooks and ballads that were sung, and listened to, by the young. 

Clearly quite a few young men and women, servants and apprentices, did attend church. The evidence on new seating arrangements in parish churches shows some age segregation: young women were separated from their mistresses, and servants stood at the back, but clearly they all did come to church, and the servants stood among adult labourers, rather than being completely separated from the community at large. Some adolescents repeatedly disturbed their fellows at church, but there were apprentices who followed the sermon intently and even took notes.

And while many among the young rejected or avoided confirmation, not a few participated in this formal acceptance into the established church. Some were confirmed when they were in their early teens, but others entered church membership during adolescence and afterwards; that is, when they were older and quite capable of making up their own minds on such matters. It is difficult to know what motivated them; there were the social pressures and dictates of adults or preachers, but attachment to religion may have played its part as well. Moreover, many also took their first communion, and, if they were servants and earned wages on their own, they then began gradually to take up their religious duties, especially the obligation to assist in running parish affairs.

As with adults, it is difficult to know how widespread and with what regularly the young attended church. While some adults went to church regularly with their children, other parents themselves failed to attend. In some places, many of those presented at court for failing to take communion were married men and their wives rather than and, like their younger counterparts, adults sometimes went to church for company; nor did the always listen attentively to sermons on Sunday afternoon. 

Still other adults cared little about their servants' whereabouts on Sundays, or were unable to send their children to church. Edward Barlow's father could not provide him with clothes 'fitting to go to the church', so he and his brothers and sister went very irregularly, if at all. Given what we know today about religious attitudes and practices in society in general, there was bound to have been not only leniency towards the young and their predilections, but shared values and beliefs as well.

Although historians differ in their assessment of the degree of piety and religious feeling of the vast majority of the population, the picture that emerges from their analyses is one in which most adults during this period adhered to a range of more or less pious ways, rather than to a strict discipline or deep devotion and religious zeal. A measure of laxity in religious practices, and occasional contempt for or indifference to religion, could be found, too. Despite some differences owing to age or to youthful preference, there was room for basic agreement between young and old in matters touching on religion and the church.”

-  Ilana Krausman Ben-Amos, “Spirituality, Leisure, Sexuality: Was There a Youth Culture?” in Adolescence and Youth in Early Modern England