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phantom-le6 · 2 years ago

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Ramble of the month January 2023: A New Year’s Medley of Rambles

We’re now into a fresh calendar year, and it’s going to be my second year of doing these monthly ramble articles in between my film and TV reviewing. This year, I’m kicking off with a few subjects in one go, in large part because a few things have come up recently that I didn’t want to pick between. The subjects in question are;

-The strangeness of wishing a happy new year and why most resolutions are never adhered to.

-England’s World Cup woes and why people shouldn’t have a go at me for noting any poor performance on our part.

-The challenge of Henry Cavill’s latest entertainment franchise, and why nothing I write will ever be for streaming.

Now, without further ado, let’s dive in on the first topic…

New Year’s customs:

As I’ve noted in some comments already made on Facebook, I’m not really one to get certain New Year’s customs. The main two are wishing people a happy new year and resolutions. Now the first is because anyone who understands basic human nature, autistics like me included, know that a happy new year simply isn’t feasible. Human beings aren’t meant to sustain a single emotional state 24 hours a day for 365 days straight, never mind the 366 days of a leap year. Hell, I’d be surprised if anyone could sustain only a single emotion for longer than a few days, maybe a week or two at a stretch.

When I consider this concept, I think about the Star Trek: Voyager TV series I’m currently reviewing. In a season 2 episode called ‘Investigations’, the character of Neelix begins a morning variety show of sorts, and Harry Kim is quick to point out that the program is heavy on lighter topics. He equates it to being a steady diet of desert, which is fine for a while, but sooner or later you’ll want some “meat and potatoes” (or whatever you prefer in the way of proper main courses). That being said, real-world news can often be overly miserable and at times needs to look at substantive news of a more positive stripe, along with the occasional “feel-good puff piece”.

This is all a reflection of the reality that humans cannot sustain a single emotional state long-term. It’s unhealthy, as is also demonstrated in Disney & Pixar’s film Inside Out. The events of that film demonstrate quite clearly that trying to maintain a single emotion just causes more problems, and allowing each emotion to perform its function is ultimately better for us. Now some may read all this and think I’m being too literal. The phrase “happy new year” is probably meant to be in reference to an average emotional state, a net result where happiness is felt the majority of the time. However, there will be a lot of autistic people that won’t quite get that, and even if “mostly happy new year” rolled off the tongue (which it doesn’t really), what are the odds the majority in society will adjust its defaults for any perceived minority? Slim to none.

As such, I prefer to go more old-school and wish people a prosperous new year, since prospering is something that we can all do over the course of a year, regardless of emotional states. What we can’t always do, and the second point of bafflement for me around New Year’s customs, is making and adhering to New Year’s Resolutions. I’ve seen this custom mocked in shows like Friends or Phineas and Ferb, and recently I’ve seen it mocked on social media. By and large, the mockery is around the fact that people often set very common goals which are then not followed through on.

Now as some people I know on social media have noted, real resolutions, real goals, real change only occurs when you have the resolve and determination to achieve something, and quite frankly, I don’t think New Year’s provides that. This is why most people don’t keep to their resolutions. They haven’t made the resolution because they actually want to change, or want to do the things necessary to achieve change. They’ve made the resolution because blind custom, ancient tradition, peer pressure or some combination of these things demand it. As such, my advice to people at this time of year is if you’re not serious about doing something, don’t do it. A date on a calendar is a date on a calendar, not a reason to get fit, find a better job or whatever your goal is. Feeling better and avoiding major health issues is cause to get fit. Earning more or getting away from stressful tasks are just cause to find new jobs. Use your common sense and set reasonable goals that you’ve got common sense reasons to achieve. If you’re just hoping on the New Year’s band-wagon, be prepared to be off it and back to your old ways before January is done.

England – it’s still not coming home for the lads:

Prior to New Year’s, and prior to Christmas before that, the world of football has experienced its first World Cup to occur in late autumn/early winter in order to allow a Middle East country to play host to such competitions. Given the intolerance and ingrained insanity of holding the tournament in nations that foolishly use religious doctrine as a poor excuse for state law, this was probably a questionable decision. However, the next one will be in the US, and let’s face it, they’re no better with how Christianity is eroding America’s separation of church and state, making that nation as much a hostage of faith as Qatar and its neighbours. Either way, the focus of this part of my ramble isn’t going to be how religion assumes a greater role than is its due in some societies.

Being from England and a bloke, there’s always an underlying societal pressure that I have an interest in football. For a long time, I didn’t have an interest in it, but over the years that’s changed. It’s still not high on my list of interests, and by-and-large the most I can stand to watch is the highlights on Match of the Day. However, during European and World Cups, I’ve found a greater interest through the option of doing a sweepstake. This combined with the wider national interest that happens when England plays tends to get me sat down watching a few matches.

Now between watching the matches and checking out Match of the Day during the domestic season, I’m pretty well-versed in football for someone who isn’t inclined to watch it with the religious zeal some apply to it. One of my staple jokes on this subject is that football is the true national religion of England, and that many people pray to the father, the son and the holy goal posts. As such, I find this makes me a tad more objective about our national team performances.

During the recent World Cup, I sat down to watch about three England matches overall, and combined with matches I’ve watched from past competitions and my other past experience that I’ve mentioned, I think I could form a fairly valid opinion on how the Lions did. To be clear, the matches I saw were our final Group Stage bout with Wales, then our matches against Senegal and France. Now the last one did involve a lot of bad refereeing that made things harder for us, but ultimately that’s the nature of the sport. ��You don’t always get fair referees who make the right call all the time. Like the players, the referees are human and thus prone to error, and a good team should be able to accept this, rise above it and try to win regardless. Play well enough and all the bad decisions against you won’t affect the outcome much at all.

Based on our performance under Southgate versus past England managers, it’s fair to say the side has improved; we’re getting further in the major competitions than we used to, and our conduct in this latest World Cup was exemplary. It probably helps that the current team doesn’t seem to contain any major egotists with tendency towards thuggish behaviour on the pitch, as was the case during the eras of Beckham and Rooney. The team has a decent work ethic, and when they deign to play well, the performances we get are entertaining to watch, even as a more casual fan of the sport. However, we’ve still not ironed out every kink, not fixed every flaw, and this brings me to why I feel England didn’t achieve as much as we could have done.

The one thing I noticed about England’s performances is the same thing I’ve noticed in my domestic side Leicester City, and that’s a tendency towards being complacent. On multiple occasions regardless of the score, England had a tendency to play a slow game, often walking the ball out from their end of the pitch rather than trying to play with any pace. There was also a rather high level of back-passing, very often inviting the opposition sides to apply pressure. Combined with some questionable passes at times, these things gave our opponents a lot of chances, which the French ultimately capitalised on to our downfall.

Now given this evident complacency, you can perhaps understand why I’m not pinning all blame for our downfall on the referee. The ultimate aim in football is to score as many goals over your opponent as possible, while conceding as few goals as possible. If you play without pace and give your opponents chances to apply pressure, that goal becomes far harder to achieve. If you play with pace and apply the pressure yourself, the objective becomes easier, even with decisions going against you. This is a lesson I have frequently known Leicester City to make, and instead of learning from our error, the national team seems determined to repeat it.

Worse by far than this, however, is how some on social media will treat you for saying what I’ve said. This is a perfectly valid and common-sense analysis of how England plays, and yet at times when I’ve voiced it, I’ve had my knowledge of the sport questioned or otherwise been insulted. In many ways, I’m not surprised; if football is a religion, it’s one with hundreds of denominations (teams) and heaven forbid anyone should criticise their own denomination, no matter how well-reasoned or constructive. Now leaving aside how stressed and angry I get being insulted for taking a more objective viewpoint on England’s performance, the knee-jerk reaction to mock anyone pointing out England’s flaws is another part of why England keeps not winning World Cups. Ignoring a problem doesn’t make it go away, nor does shutting down anyone who raises it, and if some people are too stupid or too caught up in blind worship of football to see this problem, then frankly their views and responses are the ones that should be shut down, not mine.

The upcoming Warhammer 40k film-verse:

Another recent development that’s occurred in the build-up to Christmas 2022 and the subsequent New Year is that actor Henry Cavill has quickly followed up his exit from DC Comics’ live-action movie-verse with a decision to bring the Warhammer 40,000 hobby game to live-action film. Now to anyone who thinks Cavill’s exit was all down James Gunn taking over from the Snyders as production chief on all things DC, I respectfully disagree. Cavill’s announcement of this project comes too close to the other news to sound like any kind of back-up plan or something. Given how much Cavill loves his Warhammer, my guess is bringing that universe to life is his top choice and he probably came back to the role of Superman as either a back-up or something to do in-between 40k productions.

Now before we get further into this subject, let me just clarify two things. First, I’m not calling Cavill’s 40k franchise a cinematic universe as he has, and I’ll explain why later on. Second, there are two Warhammer hobby games created by Games Workshop; the game known only as Warhammer is medieval fantasy, while Warhammer 40,000 (or 40k for short) is gothic sci-fi fantasy. Now despite how Cavill’s social media announcement was worded, it’s Warhammer 40k he’s proposing to bring to live-action film. Having been a 40k fan since I was in secondary school, this is a franchise I’m fairly familiar with, and to be honest, I don’t relish the challenge he’s going to face adapting this material.

Warhammer 40k is a hobby game with a lot of lore to inform it, and it’s not lore that’s readily translatable to new audiences in a non-literary format. The whole world of the game is set in a far-flung dystopian future, the 41st millennium AD (in real life, we’re currently in the 3rd millennium AD). It’s a world where humans have managed to create technological wonders, explore space, and then regress to the point where advanced technology has become regarded as prized relics, treated with superstition and religious reverence. It’s a world where the bulk of humanity lives in a galaxy-spanning empire known as the Imperium of Man, founded by a being known only as the Emperor around the 30th-31st millennia. In 40k’s present day (as I know it), a vast bureaucracy headed by the High Lords of Terra (Earth) run the Imperium while the Emperor is praised as a god.

The Imperium, in turn, is defended by a multitude of forces, some of which work against each other as often as they combat internal and external threats. The super-soldier knights that are the Space Marines, the common soldiery and battle tanks of the Imperial Guard, the tech marvels of the Adeptus Mechanicus and their allies the Titan Legions, the Battle Sisters of the Imperial church and the myriad arms of the Inquisition. Against them are arrayed various alien races, as well as traitor Space Marines and soldiers in service to the so-called Chaos Gods, who also send Daemons against the Imperium from their home within the Warp.

The last of these concepts entails a huge level of exposition alone; whoever writes a 40k film-verse will have to establish the Warp of 40k as different to Star Trek’s concept of warp drive without any allusion to the latter. They will have to explain how the Warp is a dimension where none of physical laws apply, where travel is as much through time as through space, and how mutated humans are needed to navigate it and communicate through it, despite the Imperium having anti-mutant doctrine in place. You’ve then got to explain the whole idea of Warp-borne psychic abilities, the Chaos gods, etc. All this and we’ve still not dived in on the individual armies, the history of the Imperium and so on. To existing fans, this won’t matter so much, but any film adaptation of an existing franchise has to effectively educate newer fans, while also honouring the lore existing fans hold as canon.

Given this, the biggest challenge Cavill and others will face will be working in enough exposition for new fans without bogging any given film down in terms of pacing, and appeasing existing fans into the bargain. My personal advice to him would be to enlist some of 40k’s existing literary talents that have some TV/film writing experience, as well as possibly poaching writing and directorial talents with a history of working on the MCU; Marvel Studios has wrestled with similar issues in their film work, and while it’s not been as good during phase 4 of the MCU, it’s still a higher standard than DC has achieved.

Now earlier I said I would explain why I’m not referring to this upcoming 40k film world as a cinematic universe. The reason is to be a cinematic universe, at least some of the productions have to be released in cinemas. However, Cavill’s announcement indicated the productions will be done via Amazon, indicating this is being done as streaming fodder. Now as someone who has long grown up with regular TV and films coming out in cinemas, I’ve very much been anti-streaming from the outset of the concept. A large part of this is because my interest in films and TV shows is not tied to a set film studio or TV channel. It’s tied to the films and shows themselves. I like some Disney productions, but not enough to subscribe to Disney+ because most other stuff I won’t be bothered about. I like a few BBC productions like Match of the Day or Death in Paradise, but would I subscribe to the BBC as a streaming service? No.

TV gives a range of channels whereas streaming is about loyalty to a single channel, a single production company. If you don’t have the money to afford all streaming options, you have to pick your company and waste money for only a handful of shows. Under a classic TV set-up, you pick the range of channels you want and get more for your money. In turn, I want the experience of seeing a film for the first time in a cinema to judge it before I commit to paying for it in my house, and I want it in a format I can take round to a friend’s house. That means Blu-rays and DVDs, not a streaming service just tied to my own TV.

For these reasons, I have decided that in the event anything I write in terms of novels becomes of interest to a film or TV producer, one of my main rules will be that it’s never adapted for streaming content, or at least not that alone. I won’t support a media format that I feel fails to consider my own preferences and effectively excludes fans from being able to access it. Amazon will, I’m sure, keep the 40k films and shows Cavill will produce confined to their streaming platform and never put it out where anti-streaming 40k fans like me will see it. As such, if I produce any novels they and other streaming platforms would be interested in adapting, my response to them will be put where I’d want to see it, or go fuck yourself. I’m a big believer in the idea that everything people might want to do, to watch, to read or listen to should always be available in multiple avenues to ensure maximum access. Making anything exclusive to streaming limits access, and as such I will never, ever support that medium unless it is only one of several avenues of distribution.

This effectively concludes my New Year’s medley ramble. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it, and that if you have any comments on the content, you’ll keep them polite and constructive; any trolling will be reported. Until the next ramble, ta-ta for now.

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yurimother · 4 years ago

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The Best Yuri of 2020

2020 was hell in every way, and many of us are looking forward to new possibilities and advances in 2021. However, the year brought us many small moments and gifts worth celebrating. Among these, the explosive growth and change within the Yuri genre are among the most precious and most outstanding achievements. This second century of Yuri opened with a bang, as phenomenal new works, creators, and moments made their mark and helped change the future genre.

This annual list is a celebration of just a handful of the fantastic titles, people, and events in Yuri. There are likely some even greater ones that did not make the list because there is so much content in both English and Japanese that even I cannot keep up. However, among the troves of treasure, these titles stood out as shining examples of Yuri excellence. Some were released this year, others were recently adapted into English, and still, others are established titles that rose to prominence to dominate the conversation and my mind this year, but every one of them is worthy of being on this list and in your heart.

Here is the Best Yuri of 2020!

15: The Curse of Kudan Remastered

Japanese Yuri visual novel developers show no sign of slowing down as they continue to push to new heights and try new ideas. These are the same amazing people who brought us the delightful educational Yuri game The Expression Amrilato and the hilarious and surprisingly queer OshiRabu: Waifus Over Husbando’s. However, this most recent release, The Curse of Kudan Remastered, is their best work yet. Released near Halloween, this game brings a new edge of dark mystery and the occult to Yuri audiences worldwide.

The Curse of Kudan is available on MangaGamer, JAST USA, Denpasoft, and Sekai Project.

14: Adachi and Shimamura

English audiences were finally treated this year to Hitoma Iruma’s long-running and wildly successful Yuri light novel series, Adachi and Shimamura. Although the story struggles to gain traction, dedicated readers’ have their patience rewarded with a sweet tale full of gay pining. Alternatively, you can jump into its stellar anime adaptation, with gorgeous visuals and realized characters you will actually be willing to put up with the annoying Yashiro just to see where the title characters go. The series shows no sign of slowing down either, as the manga adaptation is coming to Western audiences next year.

Adachi and Shimamura is available to stream on Funimation. The light novel series is published by Seven Seas - https://amzn.to/3rTSZTK

Honorable Mention: Happy Go Lucky Days

The OVA adaptation of Fragtime got most of the attention this year. Still, director Takuya Satou and Pony Canyon also gave us this much-overlooked “love is love” anthology movie based on Takako Shimura’s manga (Sweet Blue Flowers, Wandering Son). The first short in the film, “Happy,” is easily the best Yuri anime of the year. It follows the beautiful yet realistic queer love story of two women hooking up at a mutual ex-girlfriend’s wedding, only for the relationship to blossom and warm viewers’ hearts. Sadly, while stylized, the budget demanded the animation cut a few too many corners. Additionally, the subsequent stories are at best tedious and at worst alarmingly problematic, which is why Happy Go Lucky Days only gets an honorable mention.

The OVA is streaming on HIDIVE

13: Mieri Hiranishi

The Yuri scene has many colorful creators with a breadth of different ideas and stories in the genre, yet few have provided as much humor and joy as Mieri. This talented creator spectacularly tumbled into the scene with her manga essay The Moment I Realized I Wasn’t Straight, which embodies the brutal honesty and realism of Nagata Kabi and matches it with exaggerated hilarity. She continues to chronicle her painful struggles of being a butch girl in love with butch girls in the monthly series The Girl that Can’t Get a Girlfriend. Alternatively, you can follow her on Twitter for just as much heart and laughter.

Read The Girl that Can’t get a Girlfriend on Tapas and Webtoon.

12: My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom!

My Next Life as a Villainess has what can only be described as volcanic bisexual energy. Every character protagonist Catarina Claes encounters is entirely enthralled by her. Of course, she is far too preoccupied with her quest to avoid doom flags and change her ultimate fate to notice any romantic interest. The series is rewarding and well structured, as views are just as focused on how Catarina plans to avoid certain doom as they are with the various romantic misses her band of companions cooks up. While the “friendship ending” did not capitalize on its Yuri potential, it was perhaps the most satisfying possibility for this crazy harem, at least until season two comes out, which looks, unfortunately, to be significantly less queer.

My Next Life as a Villainess is streaming on Crunchyroll

11: Love Me for Who I Am

Kata Konayama’s manga series is less Yuri than a general LGBT work, but it has a lesbian character and explores her identity and struggles in great detail. Few titles before have captured the exciting and nervous waves of emotions that young people feel as they explore gender and sexual identities and try to find themselves. This heartfelt and extremely queer series rubberbands between cute moe dress up to tragic and gripping backstory, keeping readers on their toes the whole time.

Love me for Who I Am is published by Seven Seas - https://amzn.to/3rTSZTK

10: A Summer’s End – Hong Kong 1986

Oracle and Bone’s debut visual novel, A Summer’s End, is set in a vibrant and electric 1980’s Hong Kong. Drawing inspiration from classic Asian cinema, music, and fashion. The worlds of Michelle, a young office worker, and a free-spirited woman named Same collide. The two struggle to comprehend and accept each other’s feelings just as they struggle against society’s expectations and prejudices. An incredibly thoughtful and touching adventure, the creators incorporated vital contemporary elements include Asian LGBTQ rights and growing political unrest in Hong Kong, into this illustrious game.

The visual novel is available on Steam.

Honorable Mention: Goodbye, My Rose Garden

In the same vein as A Summer’s End, Goodbye, My Rose Garden is a beautiful period piece that incorporates LGBT views into its shattering narrative. The story follows a bright-eyed immigrant, Hanako, wanting to make a new life in England as an author at the dawn of the twentieth century. She takes a job as a maid to noblewoman Alice, but their relationship takes a turn when Alice asks Hanako to kill her. This poignant tale is beautiful and an honest depiction of love and its conflict with responsibility and society.

Goodbye, My Rose Garden is published by Seven Seas Entertainment - https://amzn.to/3hFSyaG

9: Shio Usui

Usui’s hit Shaikaijin Yuri manga Doughnuts Under a Crescent Moon could easily take this spot even though it is not even out in English until February 2021. The manga is already making waves and receiving constant praise. The characters and their journey to discover love and self-acceptance are as charming as they are relatable and grounded. However, it is the creator, Usui, who really deserves acclaim. Not just for their work on Doughnuts, but having a second serialized story, Onna Tomodachi to Kekkon Shitemita, in monthly Yuri magazine Comic Yuri Hime simultaneously. It is even more remarkable when you consider these two iconic stories are Usui’s first long-running works, as they only contributed one-shots before.

8: Bloom Into You: Regarding Saeki Sayaka

Bloom Into You is possibly the most iconic Yuri series in the past decade, and while the manga deserves its own place on this list, the best thing to come out of the series as a whole is easily the light novels. This trilogy by Adachi and Shimamura creator Hitoma Iruma dives deep into supporting cast member Sayaka. Readers are treated to a delightful journey as she discovers her sexuality, experiences heartbreak, and finally finds herself breaking free and falling in love. With the help of gorgeous illustrations by Nakatani Nio herself, Iruma masterfully captures Sayaka’s unique voice and emotions in this wonderful series. Whether a fan of the originals or not, every Yurijin must check out Regarding Saeki Sayaka.

The light novel series is published by Seven Seas - https://amzn.to/3hFSyaG

7: Our Teachers are Dating

The best a Yuri can get. This workplace romance follows two teachers at the start of a new relationship taking nervous yet enthusiastic first steps, including saying I love you, going on their first date, and even sleeping together. It is so heartfelt and salacious that readers will squeal the whole time. Additionally, our heroines are supported in their relationship by everyone they know, their students, colleagues, and even the principal. It is a perfect world for these two lovebirds! Our Teachers are Dating would easily be number one or two in any other year, but the competition is fierce in 2020. So even though this is only number seven, it is still a master class Yuri manga.

The manga is published by Seven Seas Entertainment - https://amzn.to/38XY3O9

6: Amongst Us

Who would have thought that a comedy alternative universe story spinoff of a fantasy action series would be the single best Yuri webcomic this year? Shilin’s astounding artwork illustrations the hilarious and irresistible journey of girlfriends Blackbird and Veloce. These two eccentric young women get into all kinds of everyday mischief that bounces between tender and touching romance, completely outrageous comedy, and downright thirst-inducing sorcery. Seriously, you should buy the first volume for Veloce’s back muscles alone. The storyline skips between time, but both their established relationship and their meeting as teenagers are adorkable and captivating.

Amongst Us is available online free on Webtoon and the comic’s website. The first volume is in paperback on Shilin’s site.

Honorable Mention: Éclair

There are a lot of Yuri anthologies out there, and they have done some beautiful things. Many focus on themes like Syrup. Others collect a series of stories by an author into one bound work. However, out of all of them, Éclair is the most successful. ASCII Media Works took some of the genre’s most extraordinary creators and let them do whatever they wanted, and the results are spectacular. The incredible talent behind Éclair somehow packs a full volume’s worth of story and character into just a few pages with every chapter. While the first volume came overseas a few years ago, Yen Press gave Yurijin a gift this year by releasing the entire rest of the series in which readers can get lost.

The anthology series is published by Yen Press - https://amzn.to/38XY3O9

5: I’m in Love with the Villainess

A small trend of isekai Yuri with villainesses emerged recently, and I honestly had few hopes of I’m in Love with the Villainess. The series is pretty popular, but I often find that this does not denote quality, and with isekai having some institutional issues, I suspected this would fall flat. Then the volume three cover showcased an incredible accomplishment, allowing for a lesbian relationship to blossom into a family with children, and it blew me away. Finally, I read volume one and realized that the series has incredible character, some of the best world-building I have ever seen in a light novel, thoughtful discussions of inequality and societal issues, and most impressively, open and frank discussion of queer identity and life Yuri has ever seen! This one is something special.

The series is published by Seven Seas Entertainment - https://amzn.to/3nedvdZ

4: The Last of Us Part II

Yes, I know this one is not Yuri and that a portion of the population despises this game and will likely be exceptionally angry at me for including it. However, I maintain that it was an incredibly challenging masterpiece. Naughty Dog did not take the easy route out and delivered one of the most devastating media experiences I have ever seen. As I said in my article about the game, playing it changed me, and it sticks with me to this day. The Last of Us Part II earns its spot on this list because it pushed boundaries more with LGBTQ inclusion than any other AAA game. From brave inclusion of LGBTQ themes to queer characters and storylines at its center, the game changes gaming and it will never go back.

The Last of Us Part II is available on PlayStation 4

3: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power

She-Ra feels like the culmination of all the LGBTQ progress western cartoons have made over the past few years. From The Legend of Korra to Steven Universe, young people are finally seeing more LGBTQ people represented on the small screen. This epic fantasy concluded with an amazing and powerful lesbian romance, delivering on its queer promise and revolutionized representation in a trope-defying crescendo.

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power is streaming on Netflix

2: The Conditions of Paradise

The greatest single Yuri work of all in 2020 was the English release of Akiko Morishima’s breakthrough manga, The Conditions of Paradise. Initially released in 2007, this anthology detailed the love between adult women. It was in every way a manga ahead of its time, and seeing it finally get a small piece of the recognition it deserves overseas is a true gift. The fact that we can own this legendary piece of Yuri history and Morishima’s other anthologies is nothing short of a blessing from the Yuri goddess.

The Conditions of Paradise is published by Seven Seas Entertainment - https://amzn.to/38bh4xq

Honorable Mention: Otherside Picnic

This eerie sci-fi horror series combines the best of pulse-pounding thrillers, complex and intelligent hard science fiction, and exciting Yuri romance. Author Iori Miyazawa spends as much time crafting a well-paced and intriguing narrative about a mysterious world where occult creatures roam as he does establishing two believable and grounded heroes in Sorawo and Toriko. The romance between the two may be slow to start, but their chemistry is undeniable and as the stakes and story build, so too does their relationship. Not only are the light novels incredible, but the series’ manga adaptation is coming soon to the West as well as an upcoming TV anime in early 2021.

Otherside Picnic is streaming on Funimation. The light novels are published by J-Novel Club - https://amzn.to/3niiv1g

1. Yuri subgenres

For a long time, Yuri was not a genre of its own, but elements of romances or bonds between women found in other works. Now, thanks to an increasing library of works, the advent of social media, and a wider audience, Yuri is a genre on its own, with many creators telling different stories in different styles. However, 2020 saw the continued emergence of something extraordinary, subgenres. Yuri is now so vast, we can actually categorize the works within. Depending on their characters, like classic schoolgirl romances or spicy shakaijin office affairs, their world, such as fantasy or isekai series and thrilling science fiction adventures, and even other elements within. One of my personal favorites is the feminist Yuri that emerges from titles like Sexiled, where women celebrate the accomplishments of other women and dismantle power structures stacked against them. Now, no matter what kind of Yurijin you are, there is something for you to love.

I am happy to leave 2020 behind, but I bring with me a renewed love and admiration for Yuri. 2021 looks to be a somehow even better year for the genre, and I am thrilled to experience every minute of it that I can. Yuri has transformed into something far greater than I ever thought it would be, and let us all enjoy its evolution and expansion together in 2021.

#yuri #manga #anime #top 10 #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtq+#queer #gay #girls love #gl #adachi and shimamura #otherside picnic #lists #2020 #happy new year #2021 #new year

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yannowhatigiveup · 4 years ago

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T.W.A.A: The Eccedentesiast

This is a one shot I started last night and I finished it at around 2 am because I’m an insomniac. Sadly this isn’t the 10k+ word one shot I was talking about (I’m still writing it aaa) but this one is around 4-5k words long so I hope you enjoy. This is rushed, badly written, badly plotted and badly named.

TW: Dark topics such as sexual assault and suicide is mentioned in this piece of writing.

Paris, the City of Love, what a big misconception that was. If anything, Paris should've been labeled as the City of Misery considering the fact it was haunted by a villain who preyed on negative emotions. No one outside of Paris knew though, they were oblivious to the fact hundreds, thousands even millions had died in the city home to the Eiffel Tower, only to be resurrected and tormented with the memories of their death. It was worse for Marinette though, she had watched all the citizens, her beloved citizens, die before her eyes and she was powerless to help them. Their screams of anguish and cries of pain forever ghosted her nightmares. It wasn't just their blood that she drowned in, she was bullied, abused and betrayed in her civilian form by those she trusted the most.

Her classmates. She thought she could trust them but they left her for someone shinier and newer. They all hurt her, destroyed her hard work, verbally and physically bullied her. Nino and Kim, her childhood friends had turned their backs on her too, even joining the others in causing her physical and emotional pain. Alya, her best friend, had become her main abuser. The reporter stabbed the poor bluenette in the back, figuratively. Lila was the one who did it literally. Lila, the sound of the name itself made Marinette sick, after all, the brunette was the one who did this to her. She made her friends turn their backs on her, she made them abuse her and she only watched with fake crocodile tears and a smug smile when no one was looking. And Adrien, he was the worst of all. When Marinette was younger, Adrien was the embodiment of perfection. But now? All she could see was a spineless coward and a predator.

As Chat Noir, he wouldn't participate in the battles, only flirting with her hero persona. He would whine like a toddler when she rejected his advancements. Even when he did join in the battles, he was useless, ignoring anything that Ladybug would tell him and go straight for the kill which never worked. Chat Noir was incompetent and a sexual harasser. As Adrien, however, he was much more. Just two days ago, he had tried to sexually assault the young bluenette. The blonde had underestimated the girl and she managed to get away but nothing could erase her memory of the event.

The ultimatum Lila had delivered to Marinette when she thirteen seemed over-dramatic and seemingly impossible at the time. Yet three years later, she was at the point of no return. Her classmates, her friends, her teachers, the boy she once loved, her partner, her parents. They all left her. Mayor Bourgeois, fearing for his daughter's safety, had sent Chloe to New York with her mother. Luka was on tour with his father so they could build a better relationship. Kagami had a family affair back in Japan that would last for at least a month. She was truly alone. Her parents had fallen victim to Lila's lies and Marinette overheard them discussing about kicking her out. The only one by her side throughout the whole ordeal was Tikki, her beloved kwami. Even Master Fu had to leave her.

Marinette felt shut out by the rest of the world. Sure, Paris adored Ladybug but it felt different. She was fighting battles alone, she stood as the last survivor, the last protector of Paris. She took that title in stride, or that's what the Parisians thought. In reality, she was hiding behind a mask.

The bluenette had suffered endlessly for years, she was ready to break that cycle of torture. Yesterday, she came to the solid conclusion of who Hawkmoth was, who is accomplices were and what his motive was. Gabriel Agreste was the man behind Paris' torment, Nathalie Sancœr was one of his accomplices and so was Lila Rossi. For his motive, he wanted to bring his wife back. Marinette understood the pain he was in but she wouldn't go to such extreme lengths as he did. Many years ago, Marinette made a friend, one of her very best friends who she fell for. But she never told anyone who he was, where he came from or even the fact that she met someone. The reason behind this was the fact she witnessed his murder. That death, of all she witnessed, was the most heartbreaking. Even when all these years have passed, she never truly got over his death. His green eyes always lingered her mind.

The bluenette let out an anguished sigh, she was on the Eiffel Tower, admiring the city's skyline despite all its obvious flaws under close inspection. Though Marinette had drastically mentally changed, she would always put on the same mask, she would always portray herself as a regular school girl. This was the one time she felt a little peace in her chaotic excuse for a life. Her blue eyes stared off into the distance, focusing on nothing in particular when she heard footsteps coming from behind. In her peripheral vision, Marinette could see the figure of Gabriel Agreste slowly approaching. Not wanting anything to happen, she made her knowledge of her appearance known.

"I never expected to see you somewhere so public, Monsieur Agreste" Her voice remained neutral. Gabriel didn't flinch meaning that he had expected her to sense his arrival, it made the young girl slightly unnerved but she refused to show it.

"The Eiffel Tower holds the greatest inspiration, as a designer yourself I'm sure you are aware" Marinette was used to his cold voice by now, she kept her guard up reminding herself that this was Hawkmoth was standing a few feet away.

She hummed, putting the two miraculous users in a deathly silence, until she decided to break it. "You know, you could've just asked" The older man raised an eyebrow in confusion but Marinette never looked in his direction, "It would've saved a lot of bloodshed"

Gabriel managed to catch up with what she was saying. "Are you implying that I am Hawkmoth?" He didn't sound offended or defensive, merely curious.

"I'm not implying anything" She replied curtly, then turning to face him. "I am merely stating a fact"

The miraculous user turned away from her, focusing his gaze on the city's skyline once more. "What are you going to do with this knowledge?"

The question confused Marinette, surely he would've attacked her or try to get her to remain silent?

He must've noticed her confusion. "Even if you wanted to, you wouldn't say anything"

Marinette turned her full body towards the taller man, she was going to end Hawkmoth's reign as quickly as she could. "I can heal her"

"What?"

"I can heal her" The bluenette repeated. "Emilie"

Gabriel also turned to face her, his usual cold scowl was replaced with a staggered expression. "Y-you can? Even after all I've done as Hawkmoth?"

Her head twisted back to portrait that was Paris. "To end it all, yes I will"

"Then please, follow me and I promise I will give you my miraculous as well as Mayura's. Just, heal my wife please" His tone changed from intrigued to pleading, Marinette could see that he meant every word.

"Oh don't worry... I will"

~~~

"I did it!" Tim's voice echoed in the Batcave.

"Did what replacement?"

"I found Hawkmoth's identity!"

Around three months ago, Wonder Woman had noticed Green Lantern trying to delete a video. She stopped him before he successfully did the task and watched the video herself, calling a meeting to express her anger about the situation. Most were shaken since they had never seen the Amazonian this livid before. She briefly explained how her mother was once a miraculous user and how powerful these magical jewelry could be. Aqua Man also shared his concerns, revealing that the fall of Atlantis was due to the miraculous. They knew the logical decision was to work on this from outside of Paris, the villain preyed on negative emotions and they had been ignoring the Parisians' calls for help for four years. Their sudden appearance would definitely trigger the heroes. So in the last month, they had gathered files of nearly every person in Paris as well as all the necessary information about every akuma attack. It was tiring for the Bats but they trudged through it anyway.

Damian had taken a special interest in the spotted-heroine specifically, without the knowledge of any of his family members. She appeared similar to a female friend he had made quite some time ago, the one who had witnessed an assassination attempt on him. He saddened him to no end knowing that the friend he loved thought he was dead. The green-eyed boy became one hundred percent convinced that this hero was his friend.

One day, Dick had caught him in the Batcave observing a recently taken image of the Ladybug heroine. His older brother thought that Damian was crushing on the lady and began to tease him as others entered the cave.

"Tt, that's not true" the green-eyed boy retaliated.

"If you don't have a crush on Ladybug then why are you staring at an image of her?" Dick added more information necessary so that his younger brothers could join in on teasing his youngest brother.

The Robin vigilante sighed and brought everyone's attention to the screen. "See that?"

"All I see is this little lady Demon Spawn" Jason's smirk was quickly gone when he noticed Damian's serious expression.

"She's alone" he stated simply and before anyone could get a word in, her explained further. "There is usually a team with her"

Everyone seemed to lean closer to the screen.

"She's fighting alone. Her 'partner' doesn't participate in the battles anymore, he stays on the sidelines, observing" He let the others catch up to what he was saying. "The attacks have been lasting a lot longer than usual, Ladybug leads a super hero team correct? Then why is she fighting alone this time."

"They could have all been killed... We have to go to Paris to help the poor girl" Dick turned to Bruce. "Who knows how much longer she'll last alone fighting a psycho butterfly man!"

Bruce's fatherly instincts were screaming at him from merely looking at the photo. "I'll announce to the League that we'll be joining the fight in Paris"

~~~

Gabriel lead Marinette to his office, Nathalie wearily watching. Just as he was about to open the double doors, his assistant collapsed in uncontrollable coughing. Marinette was much faster than the older man so she got to the woman first. The bluenette carefully put Nathalie down on one of the chairs available while putting her hand on where she thought the assistant would where the peacock brooch. The blue-eyed girl could sense the broken miraculous' energy trapped in the woman so she did the only reasonable thing she could at that moment, she extracted the corrupted magic, healing Nathalie almost instantly. Marinette ignored Gabriel's relieved expression and gestured for him to lead her to Emilie.

"When this is over, I wish to have a restraining order against your son"

"May I ask why?"

"..."

"...I understand, I'll make sure to tell Nathalie"

The older man stopped before a painting of his wife, his fingers reached for the painted shapes and pressed on them, revealing an elevator to which he went down in. Following his motion, Marinette placed her hand on the painting and allowed herself to descend down the mansion. It lead her to a repository with a catwalk which lead to a circular platform covered in luscious greenery. In the middle on the platform was a class-covered cryogenic pod which the sleeping body of Emilie Agreste lay. The bluenette carefully made her way to the glass casket, placing her hand on the transparent material when she finally reached her destination. Focusing all her energy, a red light erupted from her finger tips and it soaked into Emilie's skin. Gabriel opened the pod, carefully watching his wife as Marinette took a step back. Suddenly her eyes fluttered open.

"G-Gabriel, what happened?"

The man didn't reply, he simply hugged the woman of his dreams before turning the the young girl.

"I... Thank you Mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng, I can give you the miraculous now if-"

"Ladybug will be at the Eiffel Tower soon, I suggest you give the miraculous to her then"

Gabriel nodded and thanked the girl once more as she left. Before she reached the lift that would lead her back up to Gabriel's office, Marinette turned to face the newly reunited couple.

"Enjoy the happiness in your life, Monsieur Agreste, you never know when it may end"

She then turned to leave, not wanting to here what her former idol had to say. When she reached the main floor of the Agreste Mansion, Marinette was greeted by Nathalie. The bluenette acknowledged the assistant with a nod, meaning that Emilie was awake. The assistant let out a sigh of relief and rushed to Adrien's room, not wanting to be around the blonde boy, Marinette promptly left. Once out of the premises of the mansion, she transformed and waited for Gabriel to return the miraculous. What she didn't realise was that the Justice League would also be coming to pay her a visit.

It felt like an eternity, waiting for the miraculous to be handed back to her but the bluenette was patient. She waited four years for this moment, but she had to share the moment alone. It was bittersweet. Soon enough Gabriel arivied, hastily giving Ladybug both the brooches with apologetic eyes and leaving without a word. The spotted heroine presumed that he wanted to get back to his wife and son, she couldn't blame him. Ladybug reached for her yo-yo teary-eyed, she was going to put both miraculous in her weapon before returning them in the miracle box but she stopped when she heard multiple figures approaching where she was standing.

~~~

Batman and his sons were the ones to go to Paris and alert Ladybug of their findings. The five men found themselves in front of the Eiffel Tower, Tim found out that was were the heroes would return to after their patrol.

"We must tell Ladybug right away" Batman pulled out his grappling hook and flung himself to one of the higher levels, all but Robin followed suit.

The vigilante had a feeling to remain on a lower level. He wanted to be reunited with his long lost friend but he couldn't find the words. Simply, he used his grappling hook to bring him onto one of the beams, low enough so he couldn't be seen but high enough to hear any conversation.

"Greetings, Ladybug" His father's voice echoed through the quiet building.

"Monsieur Batman? Wh-what are you doing here?" Her voice sounded almost exactly as he remembered, of course it sounded deeper and more matured but it had a more desolated edge to it.

~~~

"We apologize for not intervening earlier but we didn't know how well we needed to control our emotions" Red Hood watched as Nightwing brushed a hand through his hair nervously.

"But we can help now!" Red Robin's excited voice came out of nowhere, Ladybug looked at the vigilante in surprise. "We found out Hawkmoth's identity so we can finish this once and-"

Ladybug put a single hand up, a small smile on her face, silencing Red Robin's rambling. "That's very considerate of you, all of you" Her gaze landed on each vigilante one at a time. "But I... have things sorted" She pulled out two brooches from behind her back to show the men before putting the miraculous in her yo-yo. "I appreciate all you've done, truly I do. But can I ask one for one more favor?"

"Of course, what is it?" Nightwing asked, clearly wanting the spotted heroine to be gleeful once more.

"Could you... help the other heroes to help the Parisians to heal?"

"It's the least we can do" Batman replied. "Will you be there too?"

"I'm afraid not" Ladybug turned around and leaned forward on the banister. "You know how Hawkmoth prays on negative emotions, so I've had to deal with my emotions in an unhealthy manor but now... Hawkmoth is no more. I can be free"

"Wh-"

"Thank you, truly" Ladybug jumped up on to railing, facing the group of vigilantes. Her sad smile faded as she stared at the floor.

They didn't even get a chance to process what was happening before it did. A bright light surrounded the young hero and they were forced to close their eyes. As the light died down, Red Hood saw a small bluenette. She looked so weak, so pretty, so... fragile. It hurt the vigilante's heart seeing someone like this being the sole protector of Paris with no one by her side.

"Hey little lady-"

"I'm sorry Tikki"

The girl looked at all the vigilantes slowly, mouthing a 'thank you' before letting herself lean backwards.

Gravity took the Parisian heroine and she fell.

A small creature holding something shiny stared in horror as its owner fell."MARINETTE!" The small creature's anguished scream seemed to bring the vigilantes back to reality.

~~~

"MARINETTE!"

Robin's head shot up, that name was all too familiar. Suddenly, he took note of a figure falling fast from above, her raven hair flowing in the wind. Without giving a second thought, he bounded down the ledge he was on, landing on one of the platforms and had his arms out ready to catch the fallen angel. The bluenette was close enough for Robin to grab her and he pulled her in so that her feet landed on the platform, her body still looming over the edge of the building. His brother and father landed not far from him, bounding over to help the bluenette but Robin took no notice of their presence.

"Why didn't you just let me f...all" The girl's voice trailed off as her eyes widened in recognition, the air in her lungs escaped from her lips. "...d-Damian?"

The two friends took no notice at how the vigilantes behind Robin stiffened. Her eyes developed a watery sheen as the situation began to really hit her. Tears threatened to spill as her lip quivered. Robin pulled her away from the ledge and she jumped into his arms, she was heavily touch-starved. Much to his family's surprise, he didn't push her away. In fact, he hugged her back. They heard what she said next.

"I... I thought you were dead, Dami"

"...why? What made you do this, Malaki?"

They didn't hear what she said next as her mumbling was muffled in Robin's chest. Nightwing walked up to the two first, kneeling down to be eye level with the girl.

"Hey Sunshine... we don't know what you've been through but we're willing to help you though it okay?" The girl looked at his sincere gaze, her eyes were so round with innocence, Nightwing thought he would melt.

"I... thank you, I'm sorry for worrying you when I... jumped" No one failed to notice when Robin ran his fingers through the bluenette's hair.

"Don't apologize Little Lady" Red Hood walked over to where Nightwing was kneeling, sitting next to his older brother. "Hawkbitch forced you to bottle up your emotions, you were just strong for too long."

Marinette looked between the two men, a grateful smile on her face while she wiped the tears of pure happiness running down her cheeks. "Thank you, I- this... this is the nicest I've been treated recently"

"If you don't mind me asking," Batman walked over and Marinette felt slightly intimidated you his presence as well as his tone. The dark knight must have noticed this since he cleared his throat and began talking in a softer manner. "What happened to cause you to go to such extremes? You're obligated to not having to talk about it right away if the subject makes you uncomfortable"

"Well I guess I do have to talk about it eventually..."

Recognising the bluenette's discomfort, Red Robin stepped in. In his palm was the shaken kwami who flew straight for Marinette once the vigilante got close enough. "Since you know Robin's identity, and we already sorta know yours, it's only fair if we tell you who we are, right?" He looked at his two older brothers and then at his adoptive father. "My name's Tim Drake nice to meet you"

Marinette was about to take his offered hand when the vigilante she presumed was Red Hood took it instead, "Jason Todd, Robin's most charming and handsome brother" She giggled at Damian's obvious annoyance.

"Well I'm Richard Grayson, Robin's favourite brother, but you can call me Dick" The vigilante in the suit who comforted her first, introduced himself.

"It's nice to meet all of you"

Batman soon came over as well to aquatint with the young heroine, offering out his hand for a handshake. "Bruce Wayne"

She returned the hand shake and brightly smiled, it blinded nearly all those near. "Thank you, Mr Wayne. Wait..." she turned to face Damian, one of her eyebrows raised. "Wayne?"

"I may have failed to mention that part" To Robin's surprise, Marinette started giggling so he huffed in taken offense.

"Sorry it's just- a girl in my class as been boasting about dating you and about the Wayne Family seeing her as their 'honorary member'. I knew she was lying I just didn't know that I would bump into the people she was lying about"

Bruce hummed. "We'll have to do something about this girl you're talking about. In the meantime, why don't you come back to the hotel with us? You and Damian can catch up" The older man saw the hesitation in her eyes but he also saw the willingness that shine through the most. "If you're living in a bad environment then you do have to escape" His sons nodded along.

"I'll come, can I bring some overnight clothes? It's been a long day..."

"Of course, you go get your belongings and you can meet us at the Grand Paris Hotel"

"I... thank you again" She transformed and headed in the direction of her house, leaving Robin at the mercy of his brothers.

"You like her, Brat" Red Robin spoke up first.

Nightwing pretended to wipe his tears. "Baby Bird's all grown up now"

"That means you can't adopt the little Pixie, don't think I haven't seen the adoption papers"

~~~

When Marinette destransformed on her balcony rooftop, she quickly went inside, packed some clothes as well as some essentials. When she was satisfied with her belongings, she gave a macaron to Tikki before heading downstairs where she was met with two disappointed looking parents.

"Is something wrong?"

"We've decided," Tom began. "We're kicking you out for what you've done to your lovely classmate, Lila"

"We don't recognise the person you've become, Marinette. You are not the daughter we raised" Sabine added

"May I pack my things in the morning?" Marinette inquired, her eyes void of emotion. When her parents nodded, she left the bakery and down to the hotel where Damian was waiting in the lobby. As she approached, he took her bag and intertwined their hands together. She blushed at the contact but leaned into his embrace.

When she entered the hotel room she was greeted by the vigilantes who were now changed and unmasked. The bluenette was welcomed with open arms, she felt the warmth in her heart for the first time since Lila's Tyranny. She briefly explained Lila's lies, what she had done to Marinette and how the bluenette was able to protect Paris. She would've carried on longer if it weren't for the hotel phone ringing. It was the receptionist, saying that someone had asked to see Marinette. Confused, she went down with Damian, Jason followed closely behind since he had grown quite attached to the little fairy. Waiting at the front desk as a woman, Damian and Jason recognised her instantly as Mayura. Damian tried to step in front of his friend but she completely ignored their futile attempts to keep her in reach.

"Ah, Hello Mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng"

"Hello Nathalie, we're you the one who asked for me?"

"Yes, I just need to clarify a few things"

"Go ahead"

"You're request for the restraining order has been fulfilled" the bluenette nodded, waiting for Gabriel's assistant to continue. "May I ask what did he do to make you request for it?"

The two notices how Marinette stiffened. She contemplated before sighing. "Attempted sexual assault. If you look at the camera footage outside of the Louvre from two days ago, seven pm onwards, you'll see your evidence." Marinette turned away from Nathalie and walked back to Damian who, once in range, pulled her in for a hug.

"I'll never let him near you again, Angel"

~~~

The next day, Bruce had shown up with Marinette at her parents' bakery. Upon hearing about the young bluenette being kicked out, he had asked for her permission for him to be her Guardian until she was old enough to live in her own. Marinette accepted his offer. When they had entered the building, her parents had greeted their customers kindly before recognising Marinette. Bruce turned to the young girl next to him and smiled.

"You go pack your things I'll deal with this" She smiled and bounded upstairs, leaving Bruce to talk with the bakery's owners.

"Hello Sir, how may we help you?" Sabine began, wanting to know who this man was.

"I've come to gain guardianship of your daughter, Marinette Dupain-Cheng"

"Why should we give you guardianship?" Tom asked.

"I'm sure you know the liability for child neglect, Mr Dupain" With his words, both adults seemed to turn white. "I will file the necessary and submit it with the court, I'm sure you'll be willing to give your approval"

Both Marinette and the mystery man left, true they were glad that their mistake of a daughter had gone but they wondered who she had gone with.

~~~

Later that afternoon was a charity event which the Waynes were supposed to attend as they were invited by the mayor himself, the plus side was that the Akuma class would also be attending and they had no clue the Wayne Family would be there.

"...And finally I'd like to thank the Wayne Family for joining us this evening" Mayor Bourgeois finished his speech and all heads turned to the table the Waynes and Marinette were sitting on. As his speech was over, a teenage girl with glass and a very pale brunette came over to the table.

"Hello Mr Wayne, My name's Alya and I'm your honorary daughter's best friend and I was hoping-"

"Marinette" Bruce began, cutting off the aspiring reporter. The Alya girl only then seemed to notice that the bluenette was sitting at the table. "Is this girl you're friend?"

The bluenette took one hard look at Alya before shaking her head, "No"

"Marislut what th-"

"It would be appreciated if you did not talk about my honorary daughter and future daughter-in-law on that manner" Both Damian and Marinette turned red, one much more than the other. "In fact we should be leaving" Bruce and the rest of the family got up. "Miss Rossi, I will not tolerate your lies. You will receive a lawsuit for defamation and slander. Have a good evening" They left, leaving a reporter, a liar and a class speechless.

When they reached the hotel room they finished packing up, they would be leaving that night. Marinette made a few phone calls, telling her friends that she would be moving to Gotham. They had their belongs taken to the limo downstairs and had a few snacks before making their way down. In the lobby were many different people around the bluenette's age, she recognised them as her classmates and continued walking beside Damian until Alex came over.

"Marinette... we're sorry. We understand that you probably won't forgive apps but we wrote you letters anyway" the skater girl gave Marinette a pile of enveloped letters, ones she put in her bag straight away.

"Thank you for your apologies but I don't think I can forgive you just yet, goodbye Alix" the bluenette got in the limo and let out a breath she knew she was holding.

Her eyes glanced out the tinted window, she smiled knowing that she was leaving Paris for a better life. A better life with a friends, a better life with a new family. A better life with Damian.

~Bonus~

The harsh blizzard outside was definitely being felt from inside the manor, leaving a cold and tired Marinette on the couch. Damian, noticing his girlfriend's state, went to grab a blanket to cover both Marinette and himself. She snuggled into the green-eyed boy, taking all the warmth she could get, and slowly she drifted off to sleep. Damian too felt drowsy so soon followed his girlfriend into dreamland.

Jason came in a few moments later to find the sleeping couple, he was then reminded by how tired he was so he went on the couch and leaned his back against his youngest brother, himself too falling victim to slumber.

The next person to walk in was Dick, he had just finished training so he was exhausted. But he couldn't help to coo when he came across the scene in front of him. The eldest son then got on the sofa and carefully leaned against Marinette, similar to what Jason had done with Damian. It didn't take long for him to join them in dozing off.

Tim arrived with a big cup of freshly made coffee, one which he was about to drink until he noticed his siblings all curled up on the couch sleeping. The co-CEO went back to the kitchen, left his cup of coffee then went to grab a blanket to join his family. Wrapping himself in a blanket burrito, Tim placed himself on the floor pressed up against sofa.

When Bruce returned home safely, he went to the main living room to see his children, and his future in-law who was basically his own by now, sleeping soundly with the TV still running. Reaching for the remote, he turned the television off and grabbed his phone to take a picture. He planned on printing it out and having it framed in his study. Bruce sat on one of the armchairs, taking a book to read. If there was peace in the house, he might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

#daminette #maribat #maridami #marinette x damian #damian x marinette #damianette #mlb x dc #ml x dc #This is so bad I hate it and it started out good as well aaaaaaaa

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realcube · 4 years ago

Text

CRYBABY (1 / 2) | tsukishima k

♡ alt fluff ending (1 / 2) of jealous — alt angst ending ( 2 / 2 )

♡ tw crying, unspecified injury, reverse hurt/comfort, mentions of violence, swearing, rude nicknames & set in a hospital

“Kei, hello? I know I’m probably the last person you want to see right now but Yamaguchi told me that you were here and..I just wanted you to know that I, uh, am really sorry and I hope you get well soon.”

tsukishima felt like shit. he woke up with a splitting headache, which was only worsened by the bright beam of the LEDs which hung right above his hospital bed. it took him a few moments to become fully conscious but when he heard the irritating beeping of the ECG, his first coherent thought was, ‘wow, i can’t believe a fist fight with the king still has me hospitalised. how embarrassing.’

little did he know, kageyama was in the infirmary room right next to his own, being treated for his broken ankle and nose.

tsukishima wasn’t spared another second to pity himself as his sore head snapped around to meet the gaze of whoever was lingering at the door, “hello?” he called out, squinting to try make out the looming figure before feeling around the side table for his glasses, “come in.”

That voice was unmistakable.

his blood ran cold, suddenly feeling extremely dizzy and sick. “(y/n).” he muttered under his breath in disbelief, as he was finally able to get a clutch on his glasses and push them up the bridge of his nose, easing his headache slightly.

“oh, thanks.” he croaked, his throat dry from both waking up and your presence. if he being completely honest, he hardly processed a word you said; as soon as he realised it was you talking, his mind was just flooded with emotions, feelings and memories alike. hardly any of them were bad — except for the more recent ones — yet he still felt an overwhelming wave of sadness which he had no choice but to hide.

“so are you just going to stand there or are you going to come in?” he inquired, concealing his regret with sass, which was all to convincing since it was a usual practise for tsukishima by now. in fact, that’s exactly what had gotten him into this situation.

you inhaled sharply, shocked by the fact that he actually wanted you to stay as you’ve been under the impression that he hates you, which is understandable considering his recent actions. hesitantly, you emerged from behind the curtain that separated the bed he lay in from the door, your heart sinking upon seeing the state he lay in; out of the many years you had been friend with him, this is the worst you’ve ever seen him. pasty, chapped lips, bloodshot eyes, messy hair and extremely scrawny, yet you couldn’t help but admire him for pushing through none the less. in your eyes, he’s still beautiful — but he’d never believe you if you told him — and he thought the exact same about you.

“how, um, how are you?” you stuttered, shuffling awkwardly as you took a seat in the chair that was already placed beside the bed. the same chair that his brother had sat in yesterday and him mother the day before that.

“what do you think?” he scoffed, gesturing to his current state and injury that was highlighted by the thick, white cast.

your eyes widened, being hit once again by the harsh reality that he was no longer your friend. “i- i don’t even know why i asked.” you murmured, voice meek and shaky enough to catch the attention of tsukishima, who also forgot that he was supposed to dislike you.

his comment wasn’t intended to be rude but in context, he could completely understand why you thought that — however, that’s just the type of guy he is. looking at your disheartened expression, he felt his own fall to resemble it. maybe kageyama did knock some sense into the blonde as he was now able to thinking clearly, recollect on how poorly he treated you and wonder why he did those things.

truly, he wanted nothing more to apologise. to tell you how awful he was and that he doesn’t hate you, quite the opposite actually! he needed to let you know that you did nothing wrong and everything bad that happened was his fault and he was willing to take full responsibility. but of course, his pride didn’t let him. all he was able to utter was, “did you check up on kageyama?”

it was a harmless question, or so he thought. just innocently inquiring about the wellbeing of his teammate and your ex, so why were tears rolling down your cheeks? and why did he feel the urge to cry too?

“yeah, but it was really awkward.”

tsukishima cheek heated up with both annoyance and at the fact your hand was now resting upon his, “why are you crying then?!” he snapped, angrily intertwining his fingers with yours, not thinking much of it, “you made it seem like he died or something!”

“why are you crying?!”

“i’m not fucking crying!” he was crying. crystalline tears running down his cheek tickling his pale skin.

outstretching your arm, you brushed your finger against his face to wipe away his tear then proceed to show him how the pad of your index finger glistened under the intense room light. “yes, you are, crybabyshima!” you half-cried, half-laughed, resulting in tsukishima hunching over to cackle at the nickname.

“i’m crying at how stupid you are!” he tired to hiss but he really couldn’t take himself seriously, involuntarily punctuating each word with a chuckle or wheeze.

“watch it, kei. the stupid one of us is in a hospital bed.”

he quirked a brow, breathing frantically from having just laughed his lungs out, “uh, yeah. because of stupidest one’s boyfriend.” he didn’t even know if what he was saying made sense or not, as his main priority was trying to catch his breath.

“ex boyfriend.” you corrected, both of you becoming uncomfortably aware that you were still holding hands at the same time, yet neither of you dared to move an inch. you sniffled while wiping your cheek with the sleeve of your jacket, “kageyama told me what happened. it was vague but he said that you attacked him because he cheated on me, is that what really happened?”

his memory of the event was as hazy as that description. although, that sounded about right but now that he heard it aloud, he realised how pathetic it sounded so obviously he didn’t want to admit to that sort of behaviour. “i don’t remember.”

“it doesn’t sound like you.” your voice was hushed, as if he was going to scold you if you spoke up. “so what do you remember?”

the headache that was previously preventing him from doing any deep thinking had now somewhat dissipated, allowing his to avert his gaze onto the hospital floor as he hummed in thought, “the last thing i remember clearly was walking to school the night after you-” he gulped, the horrible memories suddenly flooding into his mind, making his lips twitch into a frown as he recalled all the nasty things he said to you, “the night after you called me.”

you nodded, the memories not treating you kindly either as all you were able to do was mouth an ‘oh’.

“listen, (y/n).” tsukishima started, the sight of your dejected aura prompting him to finally, partially, speak his mind. “i’m sorry about what i said. i don’t even know why i said it so i don’t have an explanation..i’m just sorry.” he didn’t expect forgiveness, in all honesty. if the roles were reverse, he was unsure as to whether he’d forgive you or not. well, he probably would but still, that’s just because he’s fallen so he doesn’t expect the same leeway from you.

but to his surprise, your expression softened as you cooed, “it’s fine, kei.” with a shrug, absentmindedly stroking the back of his hand with your thumb. “i somewhat forgive you.”

his eyes basically popped out of their sockets, “what?” he almost instantly blurted out, looking at you as if you had gone mad. “why?” there was slight disgust laced in his voice, but that was as expected of him so you didn’t read to much into it.

“because you’re hot.” you joked with an eyeroll, taken back by the audacity he had to question your decision, “why do you care? just be thankful that we can be friends again!” you chirped but his grimace wiped the smile clean off you face.

he genuinely would’ve been more content if you had just stopped after your first statement. i mean, you looked at him like he was your world, even when he was laying beaten on a hospital bed, and the way your thumb gently stoked the back of his frail, calloused hand like it was treasure resulted in butterflies erupting in his stomach. was that just you being friendly?

“you really are stupid.” he tutted, averting his gaze from your watery eyes as it would do nothing more than evoke unneeded and unappreciated emotions within him. “i think i’ve made it exceeding clear that i don’t want to be your friend.” despite his efforts, his words still sounded unsure and a light blush kept creeping onto his features.

a gasp escaped your lips, your eyebrows furrowing as you immediately felt a surge of impenetrable rage shoot through your body, “why not?! i thought we were getting on like old times.” after the initial rush of adrenaline subsided, you found yourself sulking, slumping back in your chair and crossing your arms over your chest like a child. you just wanted things to go back to the way they were before, was that too much to ask? or did he truthfully detest you? and if that’s the case, why was he holding your hand so tightly, refusing to let go?

“idiot, i mean i want to be your boyfriend.” the last word was spoken meekly, as if it was a curse. “i didn’t think i’d have to spell it out for you but i guess i shouldn’t have overestimated your intelligence.” ironic, considering that you didn’t have to be a genius to figure out that he was joking. you had known him for long enough to be aware that he was physically incapable of giving a compliment without following it up with sarcasm or an insult.

it was as if someone had lit a blast furnace underneath your chair as you felt your whole body heat up to an uncomfortable extend, instantly aware of your hand in his you felt your palm become clammy — or perhaps that was his — either way, you were quick to yank away, leaving tsukishima extremely confused and oddly offended.

“kei..” you breathed, mind completely blank, “why?”

“what do you mean? i don’t know why.” this whole week has been a roller-coaster of emotions for him and now he was trying to finally bail himself out but you weren’t making it any easier, but at the end of the day, he only had himself to blame as you’d probably be a lot more forthcoming if it wasn’t for his past attitude.

there was a part of him that was ready to gush on to you about how warm you make him, how your touch sends butterflies through his body, how your general demeanour makes him feel as though he could entrust his whole life to you but his pride wouldn’t allow him to express said thoughts.

but fortunately, he didn’t need to elaborate as your finger found his jaw, tilting it upwards so he’d meet your reassuring gaze, “i’d love to. we could go to that dessert place near your house and get that couple’s discount! well, when you recover, of course.”

poor, simp tsukki didn’t even try to resist the smile his lips curled into as your minty breath tickled his skin. “i ask you out and the first thing you think about is dessert? typical.”

smirking, you leaned in to pinch his cheek but immediately jerked backwards when he winced, “ah, i’m sorry! old habits die hard.” you chuckled awkwardly, feeling a resurgence of the previous heat when he kissed the back of your hand to show no hard feelings.

“it’s fine. but as an apology, stay with me for a while.” he said, his eyes fixated on the window by his bed. his hand subconsciously finding it’s way into yours once again.

#haikyuu x gender neutral reader #tsukishima scenarios #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima oneshot #haikyuu x gn!reader #tsukishima imagine #tsukishima fluff #hq tsukishima #tsukishima x y/n #tsukishima x you #tsukishima x reader #hq fluff #haikyuu!!#👾fluff

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shihalyfie · 3 years ago

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Some things to know about the upcoming 02-related movie

As someone who seems to be known for being a 02 metablogger now (and 02 lover in general), and who’s been closely following Kizuna’s development and is generally fond of the movie itself, I figured I’d probably need to address the elephant in the room that is the announcement of the upcoming (unnamed, as of this writing) 02-related movie. This is also especially because I’ve personally been on the record saying that I absolutely did not want a Kizuna sequel. And, well, on top of that, to be a bit blunt about it, a lot of us, especially 02 fans, have a lot of reason to be skeptical of Toei right now given some of the things they’ve done with this series in the past, and 02-related things in particular (trust me, the wound is still extremely fresh), so it says a lot about what it took for me to get even remotely positive about this prospect.

Well, here’s the good news: while I of course still think there’s good reason to be apprehensive, and while I wouldn’t say everyone should be getting their expectations up for it to be guaranteed fantastic (which is something I would say about anything, regardless of whether it even has to do with Digimon or not), I don’t think there’s too much to be panicked about with this movie. Again, it took a lot for the staff to gain my trust in this respect, so it’s not something I say lightly. But if you’re a 02 fan and you’re extremely apprehensive, here are my reasons for feeling this way, and, hopefully, they might make you feel a little better too.

The reason this movie exists to begin with

One of the most striking things about this movie’s reveal was that they’ve literally only just started production on this movie. This was to the point that, at DigiFes, where this was revealed, even the voice actors stated outright that they knew absolutely nothing more than what the audience knew from the trailer. Katayama (Daisuke) only knew anything in the sense that they had him record those few lines for it. So even though it’s been a whole year and a half since Kizuna released to the public, it had only just been decided to make a new movie like this. All of the statements between Kizuna and now stating that there was nothing particularly in the works at the time were completely accurate. Of course, there are obvious hints that they were setting up for this possibility (many, many people noticed the suspiciously favorable position the 02 group was in during Kizuna, and the press releases were carefully worded so that having a movie about “Daisuke and his friends” would allow any statement about Kizuna being “the last adventure of Taichi and his friends” to still be technically truthful), but for all intents and purposes it seems like there had been no actual commitment to making this 02 movie until now, and that they’d at least wanted to gauge the surrounding climate and fanbase reactions for what people were looking for before they decided to go ahead with this.

The obvious reasons as to why this movie exist involve the fact that Daisuke and co. are pretty much the only “out” you can have to continue the Adventure universe without constantly defaulting to Taichi’s group yet again, because at the very least it’d be something that you can’t deny hasn’t exactly had the best representation in recent years. Of course they’re trying to capitalize on this! I’m not going to pretend they aren’t! But producer Kinoshita left a very interesting comment about a particular goal they have with this movie:

This time, the core behind the movie is everyone from 02! Daisuke’s group has their own different kind of charm from Taichi’s, and we want to express that precisely because we’re in the times we’re in right now.

That comment alone has a lot to unpack. (For a frame of reference, Kizuna released in Japan in February 2020; development had already long finished by the time the pandemic first hit, and it was unfortunately one of the first victims of the initial lockdowns because of how bad the timing was.) Acknowledging directly that there’s something different about Daisuke’s group and their dynamic, which makes them especially suited for what we need in “the current times”...hmm, what could that be?

The implied answer is one that many 02 lovers will know very intimately: the 02 group’s particular specialty is in uplifting others and giving each other emotional support. While Adventure had traces of these themes, 02 was the one that went really hard on the themes of dealing with grief and loss, the existential crisis of what to do with oneself in a world placing heavy pressures on you, and how to move on from hardships with the help of others. The fact that the 02 group specializes in this more than anything else is probably one of the most distinguishing factors between them and their seniors, so there’s a very heavy implication here that they understand what distinguishes 02 from Adventure, and what it uniquely would bring to the table in this kind of movie. So this isn’t just “we’re relying on the 02 kids because they’re part of the same universe”; there’s some degree of substantial understanding of what makes 02 as a series unique, and a desire to use this to its fullest extent.

Still don’t believe me? Well, how about this...

This staff really likes 02 a lot

Seki Hiromi, the original producer of Adventure and 02, was involved as a supervisor on Kizuna’s development. Seki was personally involved in the creation of these kids and 02 itself -- she’s the one who noticed the story of the nine-year-old boy skipping grades into Columbia University, the one that formed the basis of 02 itself and eventually came back for Kizuna -- and even personally vetted Kizuna’s script to make sure everyone was in character, gave her thoughts on what the kids would be like in 2010, and was (repeatedly) commented as seeming to love the kids like her own children. As of this writing, it hasn’t been confirmed whether she’s involved on the new movie, but even if she’s not, this means that the staff on Kizuna that is returning all listened closely to those discussions about what the characters are like, straight from the mouth of one of their own creators. The new character song releases had a brief mention in Lounsbery Arthur’s interview that there were apparently extensive discussions with the staff on what the characters should be like at this time, so while Seki’s involvement with that is unknown, at the very least, a lot of conscientious thought seems to be put in at all times into maintaining these characters’ integrity.

Of course, just having an original creator alone on it doesn’t necessarily do it by itself, so here’s another interesting thing: Taguchi Tomohisa, director of both Kizuna and this movie, is also very fond of 02.

I suspect we’ll be hearing more from him as this new movie goes further into development, but Taguchi himself implied that 02 was actually the one he happened to connect with in particular, and when you really think about it, given the circumstances surrounding Kizuna, it’s not actually surprising that a movie trying to be conscientiously aware of 02′s position in the narrative would have someone with a particular fondness for it on its staff. (Reason being: a lot of Adventure fans don’t care much for 02, but you’ll almost never meet a 02 fan who doesn’t also adore Adventure.) The really fun part about this, however, is that Taguchi has repeatedly stated that 02′s first movie, Hurricane Touchdown, is his favorite Digimon movie -- in a climate where everyone else was talking about Adventure. The expected answer for the majority of Adventure fans in terms of “favorite Digimon movie” is almost always Our War Game! by knockout, but no, for Taguchi, it’s Hurricane Touchdown, and not only has he said this, he won’t shut up about it. He’s been saying this since 2019. Even Seki noticed. A whole article got made about this. He brings it up whenever he has a chance to. To top it all off, when a Kizuna event asked everyone present about their favorite characters, and everyone gave Adventure-related answers, Taguchi’s response was instead Terriermon and Daisuke. And I mean, look at Kizuna itself -- its entire plot revolves around having to move on from unhealthy nostalgia, represented by kidnapping people and turning them younger and an antagonist swallowed by their own negative emotions, which, well, is literally the plot of Hurricane Touchdown. (Yeah, that Wallace cameo is very, very likely to be sheer self-indulgence.) And considering that Taguchi said his favorite human character was Daisuke, not Wallace, it means that he understands what Hurricane Touchdown brought out of Daisuke, what his interactions with Wallace meant for both characters, and how Daisuke’s best strengths lie in his ability to support and uplift others.

And, finally, we have Yamatoya, who was responsible for penning both Kizuna’s script (and, thus, being privy to Seki’s corrections) and the bonus drama CD that came with it, on the script, and he personally said that he enjoyed writing for the 02 group because he felt they were important to lightening up the mood of the heavy story Kizuna was becoming. In fact, every comment from this staff about what the 02 group brings to the table in particular has showed a good understanding of what their appeal is -- that they have to be “fun”, that they were “healing in a heavy story”, and Taguchi himself said that he got the impression that the 02 group had more straightforward paths to their epilogue careers (which is interesting, considering that I’ve also personally pointed out that the 02 group seemed to have careers with significantly lower bars than their seniors’ due to their difference in priorities). All of these things are observations you make when you know this group and the importance of the story they came from.

Extend it even further to the rest of the staff members and you’ll find there are a lot of 02 fans on there, including the animation staff, who made some very neat observations about 02 and its finale. Miyahara Takuya is a particularly amusing case, because he seems to love Imperialdramon so much that in the thanks booklet for the deluxe edition for the Blu-ray, he drew a picture of Daisuke and Ken with Imperialdramon Dragon Mode because he didn’t get to be in the movie. (As in, he actually said, point-blank in the caption, that he loves Imperialdramon and wanted to draw him because he wasn’t in the movie.)

Of course, even if you’re trying your best, things may not always work out, so I’m not saying having love for the characters will necessarily guarantee that the product turns out for the best. However, considering that historically a lot of our fears come from the idea of them milking the name value of the characters without really caring about their integrity or understanding what the series was about (especially since a lot of people in the fanbase itself don’t tend to read 02′s nuances very well), I think, at the very least, we don’t need to worry about the staff for this movie not being conscientious, nor the idea that they’re making this movie without understanding or caring about 02.

Furthermore, one thing I appreciate is that they’re actually leading the advertisement with a premise that is distinct from Kizuna’s. Of course, it covers a similar topic of “partnerships”, and it’s very possible it’ll cover the issue of the solution to Kizuna’s problem (especially since the answer was already hinted to have a heavy relationship with 02), but nevertheless, it’s an actual premise that’s not just “Kizuna’s story, but more of it”. It’s an understanding that something 02-related should be allowed to stand on its own rather than just tacking it onto an Adventure-related thing. Beyond that, while I think it’s generally expected that a side story like this should have an original character, I think it’s actually very good this time in particular that there’s a new element/character for the 02 group to interact with; again, as with Hurricane Touchdown and Daisuke, these kids often have the best brought out of them when they’re supporting others, and honestly, because the kids suffered so much in their own narrative, I’m not particularly fond of the idea of seeing them having to go through too much more trauma themselves (it’s a big reason I don’t like the idea of a 02 reboot). So while I’m sure a lot of 02 fans feel a bit antsy that the actual group itself wasn’t advertised first, I actually consider it a positive sign that they have an understanding of what context this group performs best in, and, moreover, well...the last time they unveiled something that was so focused on advertising the return of old characters that it forgot to actually be straightforward about the premise, I don’t think that ended well. So to speak.

In general, the track record is good

It’s easy to just smile and nod at the portrayal of the 02 quartet in Kizuna, because in general everything from them is in-character, but I just want to point out how significant it is that they were portrayed so conscientiously when it is really easy to mess them up. (As I like pointing out very often: even official has not historically been very careful with Daisuke’s character.) There are so many easy pitfalls you could have fallen into and pigeonholed the kids into, but Kizuna absolutely demonstrated the quartet at their best, showing off all the nuances of their character and bringing up all the parts that were most important, especially Daisuke’s best quality being “positivity and cheerfulness” and not all of the other things about him running in circles or having a crush on Hikari-chan. This even goes down to the casting; Katayama Fukujuurou sounds terrifyingly like Kiuchi Reiko in terms of all the little nuances and pitch shifts she had in her performance, and the cast themselves spoke of all the nuances present in their characters as they were studying for their roles. These are things that even fans of the series tend to miss, but the voice actors for the quartet nailed their roles so well that it’s very easy to tell that the direction understood exactly what they were looking for and needed, and casted accordingly. Even those who didn’t care for the movie much had a very hard time disputing the voice casting for the quartet (and this is saying a lot given how much voice actor changes are often a really sore point among Japanese fans).

But while the 02 group had a limited amount of screentime in Kizuna, the staff also had a lot of opportunities to prove themselves with the drama CD and the new character song CDs, and every single aspect of these reflects something that was represented in 02 itself -- again, things that often go over the heads of people who aren’t paying as close attention. The drama CD captures a lot of the essence of the dynamics between the group in only short lines, and all of the statements about the characters in the character song interviews are accurate (and remember: Arthur said directly that there were discussions with the staff about keeping them true to character). On top of that, not only do the lyrics in said songs directly mirror each character’s development from the time of the original Best Partner series, there are also a lot of things in said songs that demonstrate a nuanced understanding of each person’s character and what they got out of the events of 02. Someone with only a surface-level understanding of Ken or Iori’s character might think that Ken should only have a soft song, or that Iori shouldn’t want to do anything ridiculous, but the series goes ahead and gives Ken one of the most passionately emotional rock songs in the batch and Iori outright rap with Armadimon, which are both fitting decisions in light of Ken actually being one of the more emotionally assertive people in this group, and Iori only being stoic because he’s strict with himself and being willing to let loose in certain circumstances (especially after the events of 02).

As of this writing, I don’t know if the new movie is going to be featuring the entire group in a major role, and I’m not sure if I even want it to; as much as I do strongly feel like the group should always work together at all times, one minor personal complaint I had about Kizuna was that it tries to do too much in too little time, and I’m personally fine with this new movie being more Daisuke-centric or something if it means it can just get a nice story on the table (after all, if I wanted something that more evenly represents the entire 02 group, I’d just go back and rewatch a very nice anime series called Digimon Adventure 02). There’s also the very thorny question of what to do about Tokumitsu Yuka, since I don’t personally really like the idea of still dragging her out of retirement like this (but I also wouldn’t want them to awkwardly write around her just for this, and I’m wondering if Sonozaki voicing Tailmon in the reboot would let people accept her as a replacement without much fighting).

Nevertheless, I think Kizuna’s staff has proven more than well enough that they understand the essence of 02 and its characters, so, again, regardless of how it turns out, I at least expect that this can be made with some degree of conscientiousness, and at this point, that’s all I can ask for. I don’t think it’s fair to expect or want this movie to be the second coming of 02, because, again, if we wanted that, I think it’d be better for us to all go back and watch that lovely little 50-episode anime called Digimon Adventure 02. But in terms of being something that can add a little nice thing to the mix, I think, so far, this movie at least has positive signs of turning out that way -- and, remember, think about what I just said about initially being very against this idea; as a diehard 02 fan who has a lot of very picky feelings about how to best represent it, it took a lot for the staff to earn my trust in this sense.

#digimon #digimon adventure 02 #digimon adventure last evolution kizuna #kizuna spoilers

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yopsocs-illus · 3 years ago

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Writeblr Intro

**edit: moved to @paradisiacalshroud

So, since I'm intending to post more of my writing on here, I've decided to join writeblr.

My name's Franklin. I'm 10 days away from turning 17. I'm trans and aroace. I use he/they pronouns and prefer he/him. Ig I could consider my self a "gifted kid", but I really I just have adhd. I wasn't sure if I should join writeblr honestly, but I do follow a good amount of writers on this account and my main account and I do write more often than I draw, so....

More About Me & My Writing:

I've always enjoyed reading a lot and storytelling. I really want to tell stories, and I'm very passionate about my writing, but it isn't something I could ever do as more than a hobby, even if I want to get anything published.

World building is my jam. I absolutely love world building. Many of my stories explore that world building, as all of them (except one) take place on the same planet, Dirt, in different countries. World building is so fun!!!

My biggest audience in my writing is myself. I do share my writing with others sometimes, but a lot of what I write is written to cater specifically to myself.

My writing style is influenced by how many of my favourite writers go about storytelling. It's hard to describe what my style is like though. I find my writing gets influenced by whatever book/writing I read last that inspires me. It also depends on what sort of vibe I'm trying to create in a piece. A collection of short stories I'm working on, for example, has a more old sort of vibe to the writing, in a way. The stories in it are sort of like fairytales, and I take inspiration from older, fairytale-esque books I read as a child to create that nostalgic fairytale feeling in my writing.

In my writing style, I also really enjoy playing with phrasing and how I use words. I like to create pictures with my writing, and I like placing words in specific orders to evoke a specific feeling in the reader. Especially in my more fantastical and fairytale-esque pieces, I like to play around with unconventional phrasing. (Google Docs hates me for it lol.)

Honestly, I don't tend to write with an audience in mind, or with a much of a genre in mind. I mostly write fantasy and science fiction, sometimes a combination of both. Even in my one piece of contemporary fiction, there are elements of science fiction and fantasy. Fantasy is a genre I cannot live without. There's so much you can do within the fantasy genre.

I try to explore different themes and genres within fantasy and sci-fi settings. Like coming of age, superheroes, murder mysteries, heists, magic, found family, corruption, nature. And like mental illness, abuse, addiction, gender, sexuality, different forms of love, and different societal norms.

I also write the occasional bit of fanfiction. I recently lost like all of my work on one of my fanfic wips, so I haven't been working much on any fanfics recently...

In addition to all that, I write poetry and prose. Mostly to process emotions and events in my life. A lot of it is pretty personal and I don't post it on here. A lot of it is also pretty incoherent and unedited. Currently, the only prose I have posted is a piece I wrote about my mum and what it's been like being out to her as trans.

I'm still exploring what mediums I want to tell different stories in, but I largely work in short stories and novels.

Current WIPs:

(* = I haven't settled on the names of some of these still... but here's what I refer to them as.)

Waldosia: After seven long years at sea, Waldo Fischer returns to the Do:chaut port town of Val:dosja to finds things gave changed just as much as he expected, and the people have changed even more than he expected. There is little time to dwell on it, or how much his ex, the smuggler Shia Grimm, detests him, with the plot that brews on the horizon, however. Waldo and Shia must team up, however reluctantly, and work together with a mysterious woman on the inside of this plot if they want to keep their loved ones (and Shia’s smuggling enterprise) safe and tidy things up before Shia’s wedding turns the corner. | High-fantasy, heists, pirates, forgiveness (or lack thereof), anger, mystery, corruption, queernorm

Timekeeper Kiddos*: After a group of teens stumble upon a VR gaming arena in a cave in the mountainside, the magic of the game begins to bleed into their lives unexpectedly. | Contemporary with elements of sci-fi/fantasy, queerness, drama, friendship, mystery

JMG*: Sora Yazuqi and his brothers learn to live and let go in a world that doesn't wany them with the help of Akira Krikorian and her found family. | High-fantasy, sci-fi, found family, abuse, healing, necromancy, corruption, love, queerness

Double A Batteries: After an accident in his dad's lab, Kesh C. McInke discovered his superpowers, and after three years of avoiding his parents while sleeping on his friends' couches and delivering vigilante justice on the side, his friends force him to get his life back together as a new rival rolls into town. As Kesh, under the name Double A, fights this new villain, he unearths the bigger, more serious plots of a villainous organization and falls unexpectedly for his new roommate. | High-fantasy setting, sci-fi, superheroes, enemies-to-lovers, corruption, drama, queernorm

Of Sea Jewels and Great Lords: A collection of short stories regarding the Astellean legend of a mage trapped beneath the Heart of Astelle and the sorcerer who put him there. And regarding the side of the story untold in Astelle, of a sorcerer and a made-mage fell in love on a journey to the Heart of Astelle. | High-fantasy, fairytale-esque, queernorm, love vs. duty, dragons

Shielda × Dlade*: A young made-mage in the Iroman military, Shielda von Bauble Kate, never intended to become the fated bearer of a high-ranking armare. (I haven't decided the plot beyond that, but this story is an exploration in friendships, love, and Iroman society. Probably some ethics as well because military.) | High-fantasy, queernorm, love, friendship, societal norms, magic swords, military

Rosy*: Rosy's already crumbling life falls apart when she gets turned into a vampire. After being thought dead for months, she works to reconnect with her fiancée and family, and to get her life into some semblance of order. With the help of those around her, she learns to heal and take care of her mental health. | High-fantasy, mental health, queernorm, healing, vampires, hurt/comfort, personal growth

Camilla Marie & Co.*: The life of a young mage coming to terms with her heritage. | No plot (yet), high-fantasy, friendship, queerness, found family, nature, corruption

Bentley*: The story of how a girl found love but not a happy ending, and the tragedies that occurred. Or: Bentley’s villain origin story. | High-fantasy, love, queerness, mystery, rivals-to-lovers, corruption, mild insanity

Finished Works:

The REX Scandal: When the country of Randia opens an easy immigration program, the Randian Emigration Exchange (or REX, for short), Janine Rognue signs up, hoping it isn't too good to be true. Which, of course, it is. She ends up stranded in a new country as part of an emigration program that works as a scheme to get more of Randia's large male population married. However, she is able to find help and safety in a similarly scammed member of the exchange, Turgul Dolx, and maybe a bit of love along the way. | Low-fantasy, strangers-to-lovers, queerness, homophobia

Future WIPs:

Seeing Ghosts*: Realyn Lockworth moves in with a new roommate, Madden Livry, in Calderine City and he’s perfect—kind, caring, gentle, a great housekeeper—but he’s not really Rea’s type. Not that it matters because she’s not in the city for long; once she’s done her practicum as a research assistant for Professor Octem, she’ll be moving on to bigger and better things than a cheap shared apartment. But when Rea begins getting haunted by literal ghosts from the past, her quiet roommate may be her only hope. | High-fantasy, ghosts, some sci-fi, hurt/comfort

So yeah. If any of that interests you, please interact! Tbh I'll probably stalk through your blog if you do. I'd love to find more writers to follow and interact with! :)

#writeblr intro #new to writeblr #looking for blogs to follow #yop.writes #yopsocs jmg #yopsocs waldosia #yopsocs #ocs #writeblr introduction #wips #about wips

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wisteria-lodge · 3 years ago

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bird primary (system in progress) + burnt badger secondary (really loud bird model)

Howdy! I’m still trying to figure out my own houses and was wondering if you could provide some insight. I haven’t exactly mastered the system so I don’t know how accurate/inaccurate my claims are, so bear with me.

The “why”/Primary: I am extremely motivated by knowledge. I want to know things, not just out of intrinsic curiosity (though that does play a role), but because knowing why things work helps me protect myself more effectively.

One of the trickiest things about this system is separating motivation from method. Because yeah, they are related, but they're also really different. Like this example: "I protect myself by learning things." That's a how, that's secondary stuff. (Bird secondary of course.)

A recent example is this— a group of my former friends all ditched me because I discussed a heavily stigmatized mental disorder that I show symptoms of. And my first response (other than bawling) was to ask them why. And when I got the answer, I was hurt, but I understood. I don’t say this for you to show me pity, but rather because it illustrates this model in action.

This is a really interesting example. Your friends acted in a way that emotionally hurt you. First you processed your feelings (which you talk about in a dismissive, lighthearted, jokey way) then you asked them for more information... which hurt you, but also made you more secure. This is very Bird primary. You feel feelings, but they're whatever. What actually bothers you is not having the data.

(I suspect you're going to end up being a Double Bird. And Double Birds are unique in that their morality and problem-solving are SO interconnected, that they think I'm crazy for saying that for most people, they are in fact two very different things.)

When I got the why and processed my emotions, I cut off ties and realized that their severe judgy-ness had hindered my life for 2 years. And now that I know the “why”, I won’t bring up said disorder again until I know it’s safe. It might never be, but I still have hope.

You updated your system, and you cut away the parts that aren't serving you anymore. Bird primary.

Morally-speaking, I am very sensitive to the views of others around me.

External primary.

I’m not proud of this. In fact, it’s a detriment.

A lot of Birds feel this way. It's a big part of why they tend to like Lion primaries. Lions are much more able to dismiss things with "sounds like that's a them problem."

I won’t go into details, but my parents are… bad. Not wholly, but they are bad. I’ve tried for years, and still do, to escape their opinions because I know it’ll influence mine.

Parents are sticky. They do that. I've been a happily UnBurnt Lion primary for a while now... but I still sometimes hear that voice in my head that sounds like my mother.

And, much like them, I tend to get over-passionate in what I stand for. Unlike them, I’m willing to change if evidence supports this change. I always, however, carry the burden of my former hatred. I always feel guilt over my old beliefs. Even if I’ve changed, the pain I’ve done can never be reversed. And this guilt eats me alive, this shame of being fundamentally wrong.

Okay. You got really emotional on me really quickly here. This could mean a couple things. Your parents sound like fairly toxic Idealists, either Exploded Lions or Exploded Birds (I'm sort of leaning Lion due to the more emotion-heavy words like "passion" and "hatred.") Birds can feel bad, feel guilt, feel shame when looking back at an older version of themselves that they now consider morally repugnant. (Birds are human.) Idealists struggle with the angst of worrying that they are fundamentally wrong about the world. So you could be a guilty Bird, especially if your emotions feel wrong or unhelpful somehow. But you could also be a very Burnt Lion modeling Bird - because Bird seems safer, and you don't want to be a Lion the way your parents are.

When the friend-event happened, I thought that I was in the wrong, and that I had once again fucked myself over because of my passion and sureness in what I have.

"I thought I was wrong because I was acting like an Exploded Lion primary." Yeah, I'm thinking there's some sort of outside influence here that needs to be unpacked.

It took a lot of convincing and evidence for me to see that they were the assholes (albeit I wasn’t pure either— I was their friend, after all).

I'm definitely leaning Bird for you. A bird surrounded by Lions maybe, who sometimes uses Lion terminology. But Bird.

I am a planner and system-lover at heart. I’m not proud of it, but it’s just part of me.

What's with all this negative language? Being a planner and a system-lover is a wonderful thing to be. There's some Burning here.

The caveat— I have autism, so I’m not sure if it’s due to that or not. Hence the shortness of this section. Take it as you will, regardless of if it’s evidence or not.

I have autism and I'm a Lion Badger. People are different. The only real pattern I've observed is the way nerodivergent people disproportionately build Bird secondaries as coping strategies.

Honesty is maybe not the best policy, it’s still an admirable one. I wish, frankly, that my moral system was more honest. I feel like I have no set morals. That it all comes from elsewhere. Lion primaries have this set, intrinsic morality that I envy. My friend is a lion primary, and while my views have radically changed, hers haven’t inched. She’s always been honest about herself and what she holds true.

I'm doubling down on Bird primary for you. This is the perspective of a Bird looking in on a Lion. Lion morality isn't set or intrinsic - it's built, and it changes, but it builds and changes differently than a Bird's does (more slowly, usually). But there really is a pattern of Birds seeing it as more moral/easier/better.

And I’m still trying to figure out what “truth” means to me. I mean, yes, I’m a dry and blunt asshole, but that’s not really the same as gut morality. Internal honesty is what I want, and external honesty is what I have to some extent.

It sounds that you are going though a lot of very intense shifts in your life right now. You've got a diagnosis that has you questioning your place in the world. You've followed your parent's system all you life, and are now deciding that you don't want that. But now comes deciding what you do want, and that's a lot harder (especially for a Bird, who has to build it from the ground up.) You like the way Lions do things, but Lion primaries do not feel accessible.

I’m very clear with who I like. I can admit their faults, and even get annoyed or angry at them, but not even betrayal can stop me from loving them. I’d compare myself to the Twelfth Doctor from “Doctor Who” and Ponyboy Curtis from The Outsiders in that regard.

So maybe you are building a system with very Snake values.

Loyalty is one of my weaknesses. I get overly-attached to people, and so if/when they leave me, it shatters my world. But my brand of loyalty is mostly to people, not philosophical ideas.

... but you're not *really* comfortable with Snake either, if you consider it to be a "weakness."

I would consider myself somewhat philosophical (well, as much as a fucking teenager can be)

Teenagers are *extremely* philosophical, stop being so down on yourself.

but I can be somewhat vague in my beliefs.

Because you're still building them, give yourself a *second.*

If I were to rate the likelihood of what primary I think I am, it’s something like this:

Bird: 9/10 probability (maybe burned)

Snake: 7/10 probability

Badger: 6/10 probability (maybe burned)

Lion: 2/10 probability

What is it with Birds and numbered lists?

The “how”: I feel like I change in order to fit in. I mean, to some extent, we all do, but it’s far more drastic for me. With the lion primary friend, I act as a “Jason Todd” to their Batman. I challenge them, egg them on, crack jokes and become violently passionate and act like a nerd, and she simply watches, usually adding her own comments but mostly sitting on the sidelines by choice. We also joke that I’m the Ferris Bueller to their Cameron Frye. But, with another friend, I’m a parent figure. I listen most of the time, and sometimes jump in with creative ideas and we talk for hours about it.

I'm guessing Actor Bird, both because you can specifically list out the qualities that you "act" out. And because you're invoking and basing your performance off specific [fictional] characters. Which is a HUGE Actor Bird thing.

I go with the flow of a given situation as best as I can (with the added caveat of being autistic, because that does affect how well I can read a room). However, that’s where the adaptation ends.

Huh. I'm hearing Burnt secondary language here. "I'd like to go with the flow and read the room - but I can't, because I'm autistic." You can definitely *learn* how to read a room. Why do you think I'm so interested in (and good at :) personality systems? This is how I learned to use my Courtier Badger. I used to model Bird secondary like crazy, and I kind of don't bother anymore. I don't need the training wheels.

Planning: like I stated before, I’m a planner. I try to learn the most about a situation before jumping in. Sometimes, however, I stall the inevitable and miss my chance, so I jump in and wind up nearly drowning. And this dichotomy repeats. I overcompensate for a lack of knowledge in a situation by micromanaging, or I wind up sitting bored when I’ve already done everything I need to do. And yes, stress and boredom are equally as destructive for me. I try so hard to plan to avoid both of these outcomes, but it only works half the time. So, I guess I’m a bit of a “planster” overall.

I want to learn about a situation... but sometimes I "stall" or "drown" (Burnt language.) But planning also leads to "micromanaging" and "getting bored" (model language.) I think you've got a really loud Bird secondary model... but there might be something else underneath.

Collecting things is fun. Postcards, candles, lighters, crystals, rocks, 1940s hats, knowledge, stories, music, (original) characters, the list goes on. I’m a collector of whatever I can get my hands on. Hell, by this point, I can’t tell what’s my special interest and what I just enjoy (again, autism).

Oh my goodness gracious 'my special interest' and 'what I enjoy' are not two different categories!

But my systems and collections are my coping.

Figured.

I can’t say, though, that they hold any weight outside of emotional release. There’s nothing practical about knowing how they shot The Outsiders movie, or how crows have a flat tail and ravens have two main sections on theirs. All of this knowledge almost feels useless to me. I mean, sure, I’m great at school, but what else? Nothing, it seems like. And being good at school and nothing else makes a person go crazy when they can’t achieve their academic goals. But that’s a bit besides the point— I’m a collector, but I’m unsure how well this really fits into a secondary beyond a model.

Bird secondary model.

I invest in others more than I care to admit.

Oh man, are you a Badger secondary like me?

I genuinely believe in the goodness in humans, no matter how impossible it becomes. Even those who I don’t see any good in aren’t wholly evil. My perception isn’t law.

^ That's primary stuff. Maybe a more Badger-flavored system is going to work better for you than a Snake-flavored one.

But some people trust me: with their secrets, with homework, with relationship issues, with their religious struggles. And I try to help. I might not be good with it, but I do try to help as best I can.

Kinda sounds like a Badger secondary.

I use my planning and my categorizing skills and my knowledge to benefit others. I show up, I do what I need to do, and I don’t usually expect much to come of it. It’s nice when something does, but it’s not expected. And sometimes, these investments into others' lives and grades and relationships do pay off. I make friends. Those friends stick by me, and I trust them. I continue to invest in others, because I am a lover even though I’m cynical.

I think you're a Badger secondary.

And when that trust is broken, like the example in the beginning, I go to people who won’t abandon me to get a second opinion. When I say that I love someone, I mean it. So it hurts when they leave. It always does.

Oh that's your friends leaving hit you so hard. It's not an abstract morality thing at all, it's practical. You're a Badger secondary, and they were your base of support.

I’ll be frank on this— I’m almost entirely sure that I’m not a lion secondary. I’m fiercely efficient and some people see me as a good leader, but that’s it.

Lion and Badger are the two Inspirational secondaries. They're the one who sort of manage to collect armies or families as a side effect of existing.

Even with the leader example, I prefer interpersonal relations or to be alone. I’m not a big fan of group settings.

That's fair. I am also a Badger who really, really likes my own company. Or small groups of interesting people.

If I were to rate the likelihood of what secondary I am, it’s like this:

Bird: 7/10 probability

Badger: 6/10 probability

Snake: 5/10 probability

Lion: 0/10 probability

Other systems for comparison: I’m aware that MBTI and enneagram are, at worst, pseudo-science, but I still enjoy them regardless. At best, they’re fun self-help tools, and that’s how I try to use them.

MBTI: INTJ (Ni-Te-Fi-Se)

Enneagram: 5w4, tritype 514

Sagittarius sun libra moon cancer rising in astrology

FLEV or LFEV in attitudinal psyche

sx/sp (sexual and self-preservation) in instinctual variants

MBTI, Enneagram, and astrology are all fun in their own ways. (I don't actually know the last two!) And I can talk about them on their own terms. But this system was the best, and the most useful, when I went looking for words to describe myself.

I hope this is enough information, and thank you again if you do happen to do this! If you don’t, that’s totally okay. Have a good day!

Thank you for writing in. That was a journey! Thanks @thesketchykid for the submission.

#sortinghatchats #sortme #wisteria sorts #bird badger #birdpri #badgersec #bird secondary model #badger secondary vs bird secondary #autism stuff

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utilitycaster · 4 years ago

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What’s your thoughts on tm9 suggesting working with Trent? Do you think tm9 are being “bad friends”? I have seen a lot of discussion on it and I was wondering what your thoughts are. Apologies if you have already shared your thoughts.

Hi anon,

I have shared at least some of my thoughts but, as always, give me an inch and I will take one thousand miles and then take one thousand more. If you wanted a normal answer, please click on that link and then feel free to stop reading. If you want me to yell about behaviors in fandom that fill me with rage (and also some additional thoughts about the Mighty Nein in this episode, to be fair, which I’ve marked so you can skip to it), read on.

GOOD FUCKING LORD I AM PRETTY SURE A CERTAIN SMALL BUT LOUD PORTION WITHIN FANDOM, AND THIS IS ABOUT FANDOM IN GENERAL AND NOT SPECIFIC TO THE CRITICAL ROLE, ACTUAL PLAY, NOR D&D FANDOM, HAS NEVER HAD A FUNCTIONAL FRIENDSHIP OR RELATIONSHIP IN THEIR LIVES WHAT WITH THE WAY THEY TALK ABOUT CHARACTER INTERACTIONS. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.

I don’t think that any of the Mighty Nein were being at all inappropriate during this conversation in the first place, and more on that below, but also like, people say insensitive things to their friends all the time! It’s impossible to account for every situation that could potentially upset someone, and sometimes people need to have difficult conversations! I’ve said this before with people in private conversations but there is an exhausting amount of discourse for CR (but also, like, in general about fictional media by people who are Way Too Online) regarding who really understands and cares about whom and it’s like. They are all friends. They have all referred to each other as found family. They all care about each other. And with that in mind, it’s also true that if you or anyone else were to give me literally any pairing of two characters in the Nein, romantic or platonic, I can without considerable effort name an interaction in which one of them said or did something hurtful or insensitive to the other, because this is a thing that happens when different people with different perspectives and experiences talk to each other for any length of time.

A not-insignificant amount of discourse, in my opinion, has nothing to do with how real interpersonal relationships work and is entirely "this is my favorite/least favorite character (or ship) and I think everyone should also think they are flawless/terrible” and if I had to guess this is probably more of the same. But even if it’s not just that, the idea that the only “good” friendship is one devoid of arguments, slip-ups, and even the most minor of transgressions and anything else is “bad” or “toxic” is so divorced from reality I absolutely cannot engage with it without wanting to scream. Which is not to say that a single action by a friend, even a close one, could never be enough to invalidate the friendship. But it has to be a pretty significant and deliberate violation, and in my opinion the events of this episode do not even budge the needle.

With that out of the way before I return to it at the end: I think the overarching attitude of the Mighty Nein on the whole is “this is going to be an incredibly difficult fight, and we need to discuss all of our options, even distasteful ones that none of us particularly like.”

The linked post talks a lot about why I think Fjord brought it up in the first place, but from there, I would say that Yasha was the only one who was consistently on the side of “No,” which is in line with her character. We know Caduceus is fairly sure they’re going to die without additional help and has seen by far the most terrifying visions of what happens if they fail; that Jester likely has some similar ideas to Caleb regarding “if Trent’s with us, at least he’s not going after Marion”; and while Beau brought up the downsides of working with one’s abuser it’s highly worth noting she was still entertaining it: she floats that maybe this could kill two birds with one stone [2:01:10-ish on the Twitch video].

Veth strikes me as the one who came closest to “pushing” Caleb, and this has been a theme recently. I’m not fully sure about this - Veth is often a character I struggle to get a handle on - but I think it’s a combination of her family being at risk in the same way Jester’s is, her own feelings of guilt or shirked responsibility about leaving the Nein after this before Caleb has achieved his goals particularly given how instrumental he was to achieving hers, and a little bit of still seeing Caleb how he was earlier on, when they first met. That last reason is definitely frustrating when it happens in real life, but it’s a very real phenomenon, the first one is wholly understandable, and the middle one is both. Basically, are those actions a little selfish? Yeah, but people are selfish sometimes. There’s a reason why even when I don’t understand her Veth (and, tbh, all the Mighty Nein) feels like a wholly realized person, and it’s because of things like this, where she has real reactions and emotional turmoil in response to an incredibly stressful situation instead of being blandly understanding.

On top of that, anything that denies that Caleb was not entertaining it, particularly after he quite literally says he’s considered it, feels like ignoring his response because it doesn’t fit a particular narrative. It ignores the entire conversation with Essek, in which Caleb is the one who brings it up first, Caleb is the one who continues to argue for it after Essek expresses his discomfort, and Caleb is the one who says he’s frustrated that his attempt to persuade Essek fails.

Returning to the generalized rant but at what point do you (the abstract you, not you the anon) stop overlaying how you think someone should react and actually listen to people? One of the things in this world that genuinely angers me the most that isn’t, you know, atrocities, is when people assume how someone feels instead of asking them and persist in doing so even when told otherwise, and this is probably why the whole “the Mighty Nein are bad friends” statement has prompted such a strong response from me here. I don’t think I’m saying anything revolutionary here but all the arguments in favor of that statement are stupid! If you don’t ask for a hug, sometimes you won’t get one! If you don’t say you’re uncomfortable you can’t assume people will be aware of it! The realest distinction between good and bad friends, actually, is whether they listen to what you’re saying or if they just project what they think you should be saying, and whether they tell you what they want from you or if they make up elaborate unspoken rules that you’re supposed to magically intuit and follow. Not whether they never make mistakes, or disagree, or bring up difficult topics.

Uh, anyway, this is probably a whole lot more and maybe not even related to what you were looking for but really, the idea that a deep friendship can be reclassified into a binary from good to bad based on two conversations, and the related idea that every interaction that isn’t perfectly harmonious must have someone to blame instead of acknowledging the full depth and breadth of normal healthy interpersonal interactions, are both absolutely terrible ideas and I would love if people in general would immediately stop having them.

#long post #i should state again on the record i've been scrubbing down my kitchen all day and also my blood is full of spike protein mrna #and i already love yelling about my opinions #critical role #critical role spoilers

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footballcloud · 4 years ago

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Familiar - Anyone You’d Like

Unlucky today baby, when do you think you'll be home? xxx

delivered - 17:58

read - 18:02

It was a familiar feeling for you. Being ignored. It'd begun to become the norm meaning that loneliness had also begun to seep in. His team had suffered a heavy defeat, something else that was also becoming familiar for him and that meant you spent a large proportion of your time with him feeling like you were treading on eggshells. Although, you spent very little time together anymore, so at least he spared you that feeling. It was past 2 o'clock in the morning when he arrived home, from the 3 o'clock kick off but he seemed to be arriving back later and later each week which meant you were at home by yourself for longer and longer each week with only your phone for company. God knows what he was doing between leaving the ground and getting home. Your friends back home didn't cheer you up on FaceTime the same way a night out did but those had been few and far between recently.

As soon as he arrived home, he dropped his rucksack with a heavy thud by the door and closed it behind him. Brushing past you, he drank quickly from a glass of water that you'd left out for him in the hope it'd settle him down. You watched him as he drank it with his back turned to you, contemplating whether you should break the silence to try and console him but risk getting your head bitten off if he hadn't calmed down yet, or leave him to simmer for a while and speak to him in the morning. It wasn't a rarity for the two of you to go for days without speaking to each other despite living under the same roof and sharing a bed. You were working or he was training, away with the team or on his Xbox.

"How are you feeling?" You asked tentatively, being able to feel his anger radiating off him even with is back still turned to you. "Fucking fantastic thanks", he made a snide, sarcastic remark and wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve before refilling up his cup, "and don't tell me that bollocks about 'it's always better to talk things out', because not. You're the last person I want to speak to". He added abruptly, imitating your voice for a second or two before slamming his glass down on the kitchen worktop. His word stabbed through you like a knife in your back, but it was the last sentence that provided the fatal blow. It wasn't like you to lose it with him, you were definitely the calmer one out of the two, but even you were on the verge of losing it.

"If you don't want to talk to me now, when were you planning on speaking to me?" You raised your voice slightly as he turned round to face you and gave a pathetic shrug as if to say 'I don't know'. "Because if you're not planning on talking to me, then there's no point in me being here. You dragged me half way across the country for what? For you to ignore me, stay out until stupid hours of the morning and throw a tantrum like a child when I ask where you've been?" You snort scornfully, feeling your temper rising in your stomach but you didn't feel the need to suppress it given that's all you did around him.

"Jesus fucking Christ, lay off it will you? If it's so much of a chore to be here with me then go back home!" He folded his arms over his chest, vein pulsing prominently on the side of his neck which showed his heart rate pick up as his bit back at you. "Why can't you see the position that I'm in? Take yourself out of your stupid footballer bubble and see the bigger picture for a second. I've dropped everything for you to be here. Friends, family, degree, but you haven't even got the decency to acknowledge me!" You were somewhere between tears and about to erupt with anger. You needed to stop yourself from saying something you’d regret in a few hours time but there were some things that you needed to get off your chest because they’d be brewing in your head for a while. He’d certainly changed since he’d moved clubs, you weren’t sure if it was the bigger pay cheque, larger media following, heavier pressure on him from playing at a higher level or possibly a mixture of all of them - but he definitely wasn’t the same person you’d started dating almost three years ago now.

“All I see is someone being needy for attention”, he snarled which was the final straw for you so you took yourself off to the spare bedroom, not even able to look at him without his face making you distraught and a little teary, let alone share a bed with him. Your relationship had never been perfect, he’d blow hot and cold with you occasionally, dipping in and out of commitment without a second thought leaving you feeling like you were on the outside, never really knowing where you stood with him from time to time when he would give you the cold shoulder but cuddle you for a hour the next day. You weren’t perfect either, not being able to grasp how someone was so carefree, causing you to occasionally making a decision out of impulse rather than thinking through the consequences before hand, meaning an argument would escalate even more when he frustrated you. It was times like that when you had your biggest doubts. Lying in bed, staring at the ceiling for hours on end, trying to work out what you’d done to irritate him that time. The fact he was so carefree was beginning to become a reoccurring theme, possibly the root of the problem was that was he didn’t really care, or at least he acted like he didn’t. He was becoming inconsiderate and you were becoming tired of it.

The morning after wasn’t much better. The atmosphere was still heavy with tension that could you virtually cut with the knife you were buttering your toast with. He was across the kitchen from you, making a mug of tea with his back turned to you but you could tell from his posture alone that he was tired with his shoulders slumped. After last night’s fiasco, you’d learnt not to break the silence and get your head bitten off, you’d said all you felt you needed to without going too far and really doing some damage.

“Did you mean what you said last night?” He spoke, sleep evident in his voice as he threw the teabag in the bin. “Which bit?” You asked, not entirely sure as to which part if the argue argument he was picking at, there was quite a lot to go through. “When you were going on about the point in you being here?” He reminded of the events that’s you’d spent hours trying to block out your mind. You had two options: say yes and risk World War 3 taking place over the kitchen island or say no and bottle up your feelings again like you’d been doing for months. “Yeah... I did”, you confessed, chose the first options and watched his face sink. ‘Oh fuck’, you thought, ‘that wasn’t the answer he wanted’ - his emotions plastered on his face flung you into a world of guilt as he stared solemnly into his mug.

“Would you go back home?” He asked, not breaking his gaze with his drink to make eye contact with you. You wanted him to know how you truly felt but without hurting him, even though he’d spent months unintentionally hurting you. “I’ve considered it”, you spilt to him, “only occasionally when I’m overthinking things. You know when your deep in thought in the middle of the night and everything seems a billion times worse than it actual is”, you added, trying to reason with him to soften the blow and being careful not to add insult to injury. Yet last night, thinking about it didn’t make it any worse, instead just putting things into perspective and you were seriously considering taking a break and going back home. “I don’t think either of us are in a state to talk about”, you watched him yawn as your eyelids felt heavy, the adrenalin rush from the argument clearly took a told on your quality of sleep.

“We can’t just keep brushing it under the carpet”, he said matter-of-factly as if he hadn’t been acting like a child 8 hours ago, he was hardly a martyr. “Why are you so desperate to talk now?” You impulsively blurted and then instantly regretted it. It sounded far more facetious than you intended whilst he lent against the kitchen island as you waited for his reaction. ‘Fucking hell’, you scolded yourself for being such a bitch, whilst your boyfriend stood opposite you - practically a ticking time bomb with the end result probably him throwing hands and storming off again, but on this occasion it was probably deserved after the snide comment.

“I can’t be under a roof with you knowing that your unhappy with me, something needs to change”, he took a sip of his tea and nodded calmly, changing the subject, not giving the reaction you expected but you certainly weren’t complaining. “Tell me, what is it specifically that you makes you unhappy because I can tell somethings wrong”, he made eye contact with you, with bags under his eyes and glaze behind them that told you he was upset too. “It’s the blowing hot and cold, staying out late, mood swings...”, your voice tailed off towards the end. You could’ve rambled on and listed a whole host of things that annoyed you but you didn’t want to overwhelm him given that sensitive conversations like that were few and far between.

“The team’s been struggling at the moment, you know I haven’t quite got the hang of a work - life balance yet. I try not to bring it all home to you, babe, I swear but sometimes I can’t help it”, he babbled on aimlessly for a bit but it was the nickname that softened you, making you relax in your seat and smile slightly. At least it had given you some clarity that it was nothing you’d done to upset him. “It’s fine, calm down we can work through it”, you reassured him as he started to get worked up about what he had and hadn’t been doing over the past few months, and whilst the situation hadn’t been ‘fine’ the fact he wasn’t totally oblivious to your feelings anyone made things better. The two of you sat in silence for a while, him sipping on his drink and you nibbling your toast which had gone cold by that point.

“You gonna eat that?” He asked, eyeing up the half eaten piece of toast on your plate. You just shook your head which he basically took as an invite to finish it for you. “I love you, you know that right?” He whispered and swallowed the toast before giving you a kiss on the side of your head, no doubt leaving toast crumbs there as well. You leaned your head on his shoulder for a few moments, enjoying the blissful silence between the two you that, for once, wasn’t awkward or tense.

“You know the first thing we can sort out?” You lifted your head and faced him, who nodded eagerly

“What?”

“Your morning breath, go and clean your teeth”, you held your nose mockingly and pointed to the stairs, telling his to go to the bathroom. He furrowed his eyebrows in dismay and kissed your lips despite your resistance although it hadn’t being particularly strong given you’d had very little physical contact, that you were oh-so familiar with, it was definitely something you’d missed.

~ tell me who you imagined it with, hope you enjoyed it 💕

#ben chilwell #jack grealish #jason sancho #kai havertz #dele #james maddison #harry winks #dominic calvert lewin #eric dier #marcus rashford #mason mount #christian pulisic #footballer imagine #football imagine #premier league

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movedto-erodasghosts · 4 years ago

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the Holiday | timothée chalamet

chapter one: The Prince and the Pauper. (prince.)

↳ read Iris’ version here and a little bit of Timmy (Tom Holland fic)

I’ve had so much fun working on this Christmas series, hopefully people enjoy! This series will have 2 fics in 1, so there will be two story lines. I will be writing this Timmy version and @peeterparkr will be writing a Tom Holland version. This series is based off of the movie the Holiday, where two women with recently broken hearts decided to switch their homes over the holiday. Both of our fics will be reader insert, but for the sake of less confusion when writing about Nancy’s character I will use “Iris” and when she is writing mine she will use “Sophia”. Both fics are connected! read @peeterparkr‘s version to get the whole story!

story summary: Two women troubled with guy-problems, one who’s in love with love and one who doesn’t believe in it are both suffering from a broken heart, with little reasoning and nothing left to lose, they swap homes in each other's countries for the holidays, where they’ll meet a local guy who will probably change their destiny.

chapter summary: the heartbreak of an apathetic lover.

pairing: timothée chalamet x y/n

warnings: mentions of cheating

word count: ~7.1k

a/n: you do not have to read both, but it does make for the best experience to! please don’t feel pressured though :)

masterlist

Love was something that seemed so simple and straightforward. How could it not be? There were set guidelines for everything, rules to follow in any event. There were rules for love, rules for relationships too. Rules that were simply that, rules. Relationships didn’t have to be complicated, so long as the rules were followed. And it wasn’t like there were many rules, or that they were even complicated in themselves. Really, the biggest and most important rule was to simply not cheat, that's all. How hard could that be?

What are you supposed to do when rules are broken though? Sure, there are rules to follow if those rules are broken, but they never seemed to be rules you would need to know. So where did this put you now?

It didn’t feel so straightforward anymore though, it felt more like a whirlpool just washing away at you. Love might’ve been more complicated than you thought. Was it worth the complications? Honestly, you couldn’t say. Things never seemed to be too terribly complicated for you, it was simple enough to make most decisions. You found that people often made things far more complicated than what seemed necessary, too many feelings attached. Why did things need to have so many strings attached? Why couldn’t people just realize what was best and move on?

Then again, you were even sure you knew what was best anymore. It had seemed that you found love, that all the rules were being followed. Things seemed to be so simple, so orderly. So why did he have to go and break the rules? And what did that make everything mean?

Maybe love wasn’t even real. How could it be? If it was, why did Danny ever do that? It was a direct violation of the most basic rule, and it was just downright cruel.

Love, if it existed, wasn’t supposed to hurt. It was supposed to be supporting one another, working with each other to make life simpler. Love was meant to be just taking your partner in, sharing your interests with each other. It was removing stress and worry off the other’s shoulders.

What love wasn’t, was going behind one another’s backs. Betraying all of what you built. Love wasn’t breaking each other's hearts, and it was not breaking the rules.

Love also wasn’t meant to be a distraction, and yet you were letting it whisk your thoughts away all morning. How could you not? You couldn’t stop yourself from this non stop wondering if it was true. Had Danny really cheated on you? And if so, why? How did he expect you to react? Well, that you knew the answer to.

“Come on, y/n. What was I supposed to do? She’s new to the job, she needed some help from someone.”

“So, so what? She needed help getting laid?” You scoffed, “Don’t play that card on me. It’s not like there is much to figure out about a receptionist job.”

“I didn’t sleep with her, I swear.” It was completely unconvincing.

“On my life?”

“What?”

“Do you swear on my life?” You repeated. “If you’re so sure that you didn’t do it, swear on my life.”

You could see as his brain scrambled for answers, he was stuck in a corner.

“Y/n, come on. I’m not going to do that, I won’t swear on your life. That’s ridiculous.”

You rolled your eyes, “It’s not, it’s simple. If you could just do it then this would be over.”

“You’re being irrational.”

“I am not!” You tossed a pillow at him, “You broke the rule! You slept with her, and for what? Just so you could gaslight me about it?”

“I’m not gaslighting y—

“Oh, of course you aren’t.” You marched over to the closet, taking all of his things out. “Unbelievable, Danny. All you had to do was not cheat. It was that simple.”

“What’re you doing?” He watched you tossing everything on the bed. “Hey, don’t do this. C’mon, we can talk about this. We can work it out, right?”

“No!” You threw the last shirt. “No, Danny, we can’t. You had to go and throw it all away. You wanted her so bad, and well now you can have her.”

“It wasn’t even her! I mean, really. I just… can’t take it with you anymore. It’s always something, you know.” He sat on the bed, folding his things up as he expected them to be put back.

“Always something? Really? What does that mean?”

“Don’t act like you don’t see it. You can’t talk, you’re too busy with work. You can’t have dinner, you’re busy at the shop. You can’t just tell me how you feel instead of beating around the bush, your emotions are too sensitive to talk about apparently.”

You started walking away, “I’m not taking this from you.”

“Oh, of course not! That’s another thing,” he followed after, “it’s always about you. It’s about your schedule, your needs, your damn rules. It’d be a true miracle for me to have any input.”

“So that’s why you decided to sleep with her? Because you couldn’t work up the nerve to tell me you needed some alone time with me?” You turned around, arms crossed. “You know how much I care about the shop, and you should know that a lot of work goes into running it.”

“Maybe I just got tired of this never ending schedule built around your world.” Danny shrugged, “Was it really so bad of me to want some attention on me for once? I mean, come on!”

“It was horrible of you to break the ru—“ you stopped yourself, there was no way he would be winning the argument. “I just can’t believe you expect me to be okay with you cheating on me. You’re talking about it like, like I was supposed to expect this to be coming? Like I don’t have the right to be monumentally pissed at you right now?”

“You’re always at that damn bookstore,” he lamely fought. “I don’t know what to tell you. It’s not like we can’t work through this.”

But what made him think you wanted to work through it? Really, that was the last thing you wanted at the moment. And it wasn’t like he even deserved that much from you. He broke the rules.

He broke them, and blamed you for it. You couldn’t even see what you had done wrong, it didn’t make sense. Yes, you worked a lot, but being a shop owner is demanding. It requires a lot from you. Danny always tried convincing you to share the workload with Tom, who had been working in your shop from nearly the start. You completely trusted Tom, and yet there was this part of you that couldn’t just let him do that out of worry that things just wouldn’t be the same if it was him instead of you.

Even if you worked too much, that was no reason for Danny to do what he had done. It just didn’t make sense. Why were you even letting it eat away at you? That was the kind of thing you would typically consider to be a waste of time, so you were unsure as to why you were so caught up in it now.

“Y/n, hey,” Tom poked your side. “You okay? You’ve been putting the books up the wrong way.”

“Hmm?” You glanced at him before looking back to the books in front of you. “Shit…”

You hadn’t even noticed, not a single one of them.

He chuckled, reaching out to help you fix them. “You seem lost in the clouds today.”

“I know, sorry. It’s just… Danny and I had a fight last night and this morning. I guess I’m just trying to figure that out.”

His brows furrowed, “What was the fight about?”

You stacked up the books and let out a long and heavy sigh. Running a hand down your face, you chuckled, “He fucked his receptionist.”

Simple, straightforward.

“Oh wow,” Tom’s eyes widened. “Umm… did he…” he cleared his throat, “did he confess?”

“Indirectly.” You shook your head, “He blamed me for it. Said he needed some attention, and that I fail to give it to him. He told me I spend too much time here, and that I make everything about myself.” You started shoving the books back into place, Tom handing you a new one each time.

“So he thinks he’s justified?”

“Completely, and he expected me to just move on from it and maintain our relationship. I mean, how the hell do I just move on from that?” You looked at Tom.

He shrugged, pointing to the shelf, “Still not put up right.”

Looking over, you noticed they weren’t. Some books were placed upside down, or even backwards. It wasn’t like you to mess up something so minor or to get that lost in your own thoughts.

“Fuck…” you started taking them out again.

“Let me,” he stepped over, taking the books from your hands. “Go on about Danny, though.”

He didn’t need to tell you twice, “He’s made it all complicated. It wasn’t supposed to be this way. I could’ve sworn to you a week ago that we loved one another. You know, we just… we seemed to work so well together. He didn’t seem to mind my busy schedule, it’s like that came out of nowhere. I just thought he was more understanding.”

“So he’s upset the balance?”

“More than that, he’s thrown me completely off trail. He broke the rule, Tom!” Your voice was louder than you realized, for once you had forgotten you were even in your shop.

“It sounds to me like he’s not worth the worry,” He put the last book in. “Don’t let him eat away at you like this, it’s not like you.”

“Exactly, so why does it bother me so much?” You pulled yourself up onto the counter.

“Well… you loved him. You’ve been together for so long—”

“We were together,” you corrected. “I kicked him out this morning.”

“Right, sorry.” He started placing clearance stickers on some books, “You were together for a long time, and it’s still so fresh to you.”

“That’s the thing, we were together for so long, and yet he still did that.” You jumped down, beginning to put away more books. “I just… I want to shake him off, pretend he never happened.”

It would be much easier to just ignore him, even if you knew it wouldn’t actually solve anything. Maybe it could, though. If he was never a part of your life, you would’ve never felt this pain.

“It’s just not so simple to move on from love like that. I wish it were, believe me, but it’s just not.”

“How could’ve that been love, though? I mean, isn’t love supposed to be this grand thing? Where you meet ‘the one’ and you care for one another deeply. You do whatever you can to help each other, to be there.” You scoffed, “There is nothing like that that exists.”

“Ouch,” Tom rested a hand over his heart, “does our friendship mean nothing to you? Would I not do those things for you?”

“It’s a completely different context, and I’ve known you for most of my life.”

“Okay, okay… but you shouldn’t just give up love because of this one bad experience. You know, I’m sure there are loads of other opportunities out there for you to see better examples of love.”

“Oh yeah? And how do you suggest I would find such ‘love’?” You raised a brow, he sounded so childish.

“I don’t know… I just think that love can happen anywhere, at any time. It’s not something that needs to be planned or to follow some schedule. It just… happens.” Tom smiled softly, “And love shouldn’t hurt, no, but sometimes it does. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth the pain. Don’t get me wrong, Danny’s absolutely not worth the pain himself. But I don’t want your image of love to be ruined from just one guy.”

Tom was right about one thing, Danny wasn’t worth the pain. But that pain wasn’t love, and your relationship with Danny apparently wasn’t either.

“It’s a fantasy, Tom.” You turned away, “I mean, maybe some people find love, but it has to be rare. Most people probably just settle out of being tired of looking.” You felt that was true. “Love doesn’t just come waltzing through the door.”

“Well, no,” he sighed. “But that doesn’t mean love isn’t out there. It has to be, you know? And finding love is just that much more precious, because it’s so much harder to come by, if that’s what you believe.”

It sounded like a fairytale to you, how could he believe in such a thing? Maybe he was right that love existed, but it wasn’t like everyone was finding it. In your mind, there was simply no way it could be as common as Tom seemed to believe.

“Aren’t you just the love expert, what with your relationship with Destiny?” You teased.

His relationship with Destiny didn’t seem to be one of love to you, not that it was really any of your business. You worried for Tom and didn’t want him to end up in the same boat as you, though you hadn’t seen it coming before. Destiny just seemed so disinterested in him, which you hated for him. You never really said that to him, as you felt that would be completely overstepping. Still, you had hinted the thought at him, because you felt like you couldn’t just let it happen. She seemed like trouble.

Maybe your experience with Danny only gave you a better ability to see when someone was going to hurt someone in a relationship. That, or you just didn’t like her from the beginning, as Tom claims. Destiny seemed nice enough but you weren’t sure how much she cared for him. That was between them, though.

“I’m not an expert,” Tom denied. “I just think that you could find love again.”

“I don’t think I ever really did, and I’m not sure that I ever want to. It seems to be more of a waste of time than anything else.” You were so set on that idea.

Tom couldn’t understand why someone wouldn’t want to believe in love, what was to hate about it? He understood that you were likely trying to process countless emotions, but there was something about how you pictured love that he could never fully understand. Your version of love seemed to be somewhat more of a business transaction rather than what he believed.

“So, how are you going to magically get over this?” He straightened up his pile of books.

“I should just… leave. Get away from here.” You started to fix a random display, “It’s what I need, a break. From him, from this, from everything.”

“You? Take a break?” He laughed, “Right, sure. Y/n, it would be a true miracle for you to take a break.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” You snapped.

You knew exactly what he meant. Anyone who talked to you for more than ten minutes knew what that meant, that didn’t mean you weren’t mad at him for pointing it out. Work was important to you, and you spent a lot of time in your shop. It took more to run it than people realized. Danny never understood.

“I just…” he shifted his gaze to his feet. “I just mean that… you’re a hard worker. A very… very hard worker.”

“Which is why I deserve a break!” You made your way back to the counter.

“You do deserve one,” he assured you. “I just meant it’s unlike you. But, you had planned to go on holiday with Danny, hadn’t you? You could still go.”

“Oh god,” you groaned. “I forgot about that. We were meant to come up with an entire plan for it, we had already put my flat up on Airbnb.” You were mentally beating yourself up for that one, suppose you’d have to take it down later. “We hadn’t even figured out where we wanted to go, we were so caught up in work. Well,” you scoffed, “I was caught up in work, and he was distracted with his receptionist.”

Tom offered a sympathetic smile, “You could still go on holiday. You said you wanted to just forget about it and that would be the perfect opportunity.”

He made a good point. It did seem to be the obvious answer to your problem. You could get away, clear your mind of Danny completely, and come back to move on with your life smoothly. Danny didn’t have to be a complication anymore, he didn’t even have to be a thought. Yet, at the same time, there was a part of you that felt like it wasn’t the best idea to just run away from your problems. But was it really running away?

“No one has reached out about the flat anyway,” you stated quietly. “Maybe it’s not such a good idea. Maybe that’s my sign to stay?” But were you even one to believe in signs? “I don’t know. I think I’ll just go to bed, do you mind locking up? You’ve got the keys, right?”

He jangled them in your direction, “Yep. See you tomorrow.”

You gave him a wave before making your way up to your house, just above your shop. Going on holiday seemed to be what you needed. Like he said, the perfect opportunity. It wasn’t like you though, he was right about that too. Maybe what you really needed was to create a new routine for yourself, one without Danny. To create a life for yourself where there was one less thing to focus on.

Opening your laptop, you went to check on your Airbnb account. No one had reached out still, which only pushed your thoughts more towards staying. After all, it was a possible sign to stay.

It felt ridiculous, to think anything like that was a sign. You didn’t listen to signs, you listened to facts, to what was right in front of you. The truth of it was that no one had reached out, you needed to just remove your home from the sight and continue on with your typical life. So you did, staring blankly at the screen after.

What was your typical life now? Were you supposed to just move on? If that was what you were really meant to do, you didn’t know if you could. You couldn’t lie, deep down you knew it hurt, and maybe that’s why you wanted to leave. But leaving would really do you no good, even if it was what you wanted to do. Instead, you would do what? Ignore them in a different way? Pretend it never happened, that Danny never existed.

Yes, that is what you would do. He didn’t deserve more of your time to be spent on him, he deserved to be forgotten. You didn’t know how you really could forget, especially as you sat surrounded by a life you built with him. How many trinkets around your living room were his? How many things did you get because that was what he wanted for his home? The pile of CDs in the corner were his own taste in music, most of which you could never really get into. Suddenly, everything around you felt wrong, like it wasn’t even your home at all.

Maybe you needed that holiday after all. You weren’t really sure what to do. Where would you go? Would you be able to leave the shop to Tom? Would it even really be worth the trip? What if it only stirred up some new form of emotions? You couldn’t go.

Your account popped up with a notification, someone was actually reaching out to you.

A woman named Iris messaged, “Hey, I was interested in your house! I don’t know if someone else rented it but I thought it was worth the shot. Is it still available? I’m sorry if it’s not. I just really liked your place! It’s okay if it’s not! Sorry! Thank you!”

Could be another sign, you thought. It still wasn’t something you really believed in though.

“Oh, sorry! I was renting it because I was planning to go on holiday with my boyfriend but plans changed. We broke up recently so I won’t be going anymore.” It was a fair enough explanation, though you weren’t sure that a stranger cared to know the reasoning.

“Oh, I’m sorry! why did you break up with him?” Or maybe she did care.

Another message came through quickly after the other. She felt as if she had overstepped, “I’m sorry you don’t have to answer that. I don’t know why I asked.”

You hadn’t really minded, a part of you wanted to completely vent to her. It wasn’t like you would ever meet her, so why did it really matter? Keeping to yourself was the wiser option, though, and it wasn’t like you had much to say about the situation.

“No, don’t worry! I guess it’s pretty complicated but long story short, he cheated on me.” Simple enough.

Iris’ reply caught you off guard, “Men are trash.”

She was right. Men are trash, and not worth anyone’s time. No use in crying over spilled milk, yet here you were with a shattered heart being held together by Paw Patrol band-aids.

“To say the least” you laughed to yourself.

God, were you really letting yourself sit in that pain? Furthermore, were you really letting yourself vent to a stranger on Airbnb of all things? You weren’t being yourself, not really. Not that you had been for a majority of the day though. Everything seemed off.

“I’m really sorry, I know how it feels. I was actually looking at your place to escape from a man myself. The love of my life, Chad, just got engaged.” An Iris fell in love with a Chad?

You couldn’t help but laugh again, at least someone else was going through some similar pain. His name was Chad, falling for a Chad was pain in itself. A part of you wanted to know more about Iris’ situation.

“Chad?” you wrote back.

“I know. It’s my fault for falling in love with a Chad. Lives up to his stupid name.” Though you had never spoken to this woman, you could hear the regret in her voice.

At least you hadn’t ended up with a Chad, but you weren’t sure that Danny was much better. “Well, I’m sorry that ‘Chad’ had to be the love of your life. It sounds like we both need to get away.”

You really had needed to get away, that was something you now knew.

“Definitely, but I’m gonna keep looking. I need to be at least 500 miles away from him.” She replied.

You couldn’t believe what you were about to say, and a part of you hoped that she would just sort of brush you off. Another part of you was hoping that she would reach out further. It did seem like a possibility, since she had reached out after it was removed.

“Maybe we could work something out?” You figured if you could at least commit to renting out your place that you would then commit to taking a holiday.

“Let’s switch lives like in The Parent Trap, although we’re not twins we’d be switching breakup lives.” You thought it could just be a joke, but it also seemed like an intriguing idea.

“Sounds interesting! Where are you from?” You asked, a bit hopeful.

This was not much like yourself, it seemed like such a crazy idea. You hadn’t traveled in a long time, and even then you had never traveled alone. Suddenly, it was all you could think of doing. It would mean escape, a new setting and a chance to give yourself a fresh start. You just hoped she lived far, far away.

She replied, “Astoria, Oregon. Pretty boring compared to London I guess.”

You gave it a quick Google, just to get an idea of what it was like. You hadn’t heard of it before, and it would put a pretty good distance between yourself and Danny. It was far, small, and unknown. The only things you really cared about.

“Not at all! All I care is that it’s far from here.” It was the perfect distance, really.

“Me too.” She replied.

You hesitated, unsure of what you were about to ask. “So, should we switch?”

“You’re serious? My place is nothing like yours.” So it was great then? Maybe the polar opposite of your current situation.

“Surely it’s not too horrible.”

“I have a kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, living room. That's it. And I’m not near a romantic location like yours. I do have a dog, though.” She was only making it more and more appealing to you. You wanted to leave the “romance” and you couldn’t imagine why she would want to run towards it.

“That’s perfect, I want far away from romance.” You had, really. You were never a big fan of the romance part of it all anyway, it seemed overrated at this point.

“Well, this is your chance.”

You paused to think, was this really the choice you wanted to make? You had been thinking about it all day, but having it suddenly becoming a reality was different, overwhelming almost.

“Can I ask you one thing?” It was the most important question you had.

After a brief pause she responded, “Sure.”

“Are there any men in your town?”

“Honestly? Zero.”

So it really was turning out to be the perfect escape. “When can I come?”

“Tomorrow too soon?” She seemed just as eager as you to get away.

You considered it, would it be an irrational decision? You knew that if you declined you would likely never really break away. Besides, Iris seemed to need it just as much as you did, if not more because of Chad.

“Tomorrow’s perfect actually.” Had you really just sent that?

Apparently you had, as she replied, “wait wait wait but like are you for real?”

Maybe? “Absolutely, or would it be too crazy?”

It was completely insane, but you were going for it. Like you had said, you would likely never have to talk to this person again, why not make yourself seem crazy?

“It is but I’m down for it, but like, okay do you want pics of my home or something so you don’t think I’m a creepy old man who might kidnap you?” Not the response you were expecting.

Still, you decided to roll with it. “Umm, yes actually :) that would be great”

“Okay, wait, want my phone number so we’re not talking over air bnb?” she asked.

You nodded gently to yourself, “Yes, I feel like that might be better.”

It felt strange to be doing such a thing. You were talking to a complete stranger, from a completely different country, about switching homes. And switching the next day, no less.

You weren’t really sure how, but your conversation had somehow managed to become more personal as it went on. After texting for a bit longer, and seeing pictures of her house, you both had decided to give each other a call over facetime. It was nice, kind of, in it’s own strange way, to be talking to Iris about it all. Sure, she seemed to have more faith in love than you did, but she still could understand where you were coming from to at least some extent.

So, yes, maybe you were ranting to a complete stranger about how your boyfriend had cheated on you. To be fair, she was also ranting to you about how the “love of her life” just got engaged to someone else. He seemed like a dick, truly. It made you wonder why either of you were letting men like Chad and Danny hurt the both of you, and they still were hurting you, really. It didn’t seem fair. If there was such a thing as love, why did you have to love them?

Iris seemed to have a tender heart. She spoke so delicately about love, and you swore she seemed to still want it even after what she had just gone through. You couldn’t imagine, you wanted to run from love. You wanted to leave it behind and forget that it was ever a thing. Yet Iris seemed to want to hold it close, and to possibly find it again. It was interesting to you, how differently the both of you viewed it.

The call had been going for what felt like hours, and you seemed to be learning more about Iris than you had ever truly known about Danny. She was a writer, and surely a lovely one at that. Apparently, Chad took advantage of that, though, among other things. He seemed to only care about Iris to the extent that she was there at his own convenience. Your heart broke more, you thought, but this time for Iris. Because, no, you didn’t believe in love. But she did.

Iris had this idea of love that you couldn’t understand. It seemed too fake, like it was pulled out of a movie or book. Iris thought that love was complex, that it could be found and more than once. Her idea of love seemed so far from your own, and you couldn’t picture why. Why would she still believe in something like love after what happened with Chad?

Really, it didn’t matter much. Maybe it was your vastly different views, but talking with each other seemed so easy. It was almost as if you were just talking to an old friend.

“So how long were you with him?” Iris asked.

“About four years.” It was a waste of four years. “What about you? How long have you loved Chad?”

You couldn’t help but poke fun at his name. Chad.

“Oh god it does sound super stupid,” she groaned. “But… Three stupid and miserable years, it’s a low point.”

You chuckled, “No, it’s not stupid. But, I can imagine how it would be a low point.”

“But like you told me—He blamed it on you?”

“He did.” You let your head rest in your hand, “He said I worked too much, and that I didn’t give him enough attention.”

Iris rolled her eyes, once again tired of Danny, a man she had never even met. “Fuck him, honestly, you’re successful bet he was intimidated by your success.”

“Hmm, I doubt it. He just seemed… bored of me.” You reached for your glass of wine, “I mean, he was right about one thing. I do spend most of my time at work, but that doesn’t give him any right to do that.”

She sat on her couch, wine in hand. “No. it doesn’t. Why—Why are men—Like—No, never mind that’s my question,” she pursed her lips jokingly, “why are men?”

You laughed, “Why are men indeed.” You couldn’t help but grin, “More specifically, why is Chad?”

“Ugh, don’t even mention him.” Iris let her head fall back, “He’s an asshole, can you imagine just a week ago he wanted to sleep with me?”

Chad was an asshole, and so his name fit him well. It was still hard, almost impossible, to see what she ever saw in him. Iris seemed so soft, and kind. You could tell that, sadly, Chad had really hurt her.

You spoke truthfully, “What I really have trouble understanding is why you ever wanted to sleep with him. Maybe his personality, but he seems like such a wad.”

She paused to consider, and it then left you in your own thoughts about it. A Chad was never deserving of an Iris, so you couldn’t help but wonder why. You figured, though, that she was like you with Danny. She likely didn’t know that Chad was a jerk, how could’ve she? Though the signs seemed obvious to you, you weren’t the one living that experience.

“Look—I—I believe in love at first sight and I don’t know, I guess—I saw the fantasy, you know?” She seemed to be lost in thought almost, like it was just coming out in full truth. “Thought we could—I don’t know, he was charming.” Aren’t they always? “I guess I wanted that, you know the whole love story, and he made me believe he could give it to me and then he just never—He only wanted sex and I fell in love. Pathetic right?”

You didn’t think it was pathetic at all. If anything, it was sweet. She truly seemed to believe that love existed, and if that was the case then she was speaking from a place of vulnerability.

“No, I don’t think it’s pathetic…” you took a breath in, “I think… well, I’ve come to the conclusion that love isn’t worth any cost. Not really, especially since it doesn’t even seem real.” And it didn’t, how could it? “Love makes people get their hopes up. It makes us… give too much of ourselves to other people, when we don’t even know what our future with them looks like.” And that was what you thought of it. Love was a chore, a fairytale, a loss. “But I don’t think it’s pathetic that you wanted to believe in something that only seems to come from fairytales, I just think that’s what most people do.”

“Love is worth it, though.” You likely seemed heartless to Iris. “It’s men who are the problem.”

That was something you could agree on. “Suppose you got me there…”

“But you like really don’t believe in love?” she wondered. “Then why were you with Danny? Didn’t you love him?”

Well, Danny. Your relationship with Danny seemed like love, but you weren’t so sure anymore. It couldn’t have been love if it only led to him cheating on you, no. Love wasn’t meant to have those sorts of complications.

“You know, I thought I loved him, and I thought he loved me.” You stared blankly, “But, I guess he just… didn’t. And it just made me realize that, even if love is real, it comes so rarely that I don't believe I would ever find it.” Which hurt a bit to say out loud. “I just don’t think most people do.” Your eyes flickered back to Iris, “Why have you put so much into it if you were hurt?”

“I think… I dunno, love isn’t a one time thing.” She sounded like Tom, which wasn’t necessarily bad. “I think the problem is I suffered from unrequited love, but I think I… I dunno, I think we get chances, not me though,” she scoffed and you offered a small smile, “but it’s… I don’t know, I think I’ve always read about love and I’ve always wanted that, and love is complicated, that’s it, I don’t think you can easily-I mean I do believe in a sort of thing like love at first sight but I mean, I believe in second chances, but like not for everyone. I guess I… I think there is such a thing as love I’m just… super unlucky and maybe that sweet fantasy of any Julia Roberts’ romcom isn’t for me, I’m destined to be a side character who gets no… attention.”

It was disheartening to hear her saying that. You didn’t believe in things like that, and you were normally so quick to fight Tom about it, but it just hurt to hear her talking about it. Iris believed in this full on Shakesperian love, so hearing her say something so somber was odd. You thought it couldn’t be true, because she seemed to be the main character, really. Her disheveled hair, multitude of snacks, and her glass of wine. While it may not be the “picture perfect” main character, it was a real one. That was exactly what you pictured when it came to a main character, so what made her think otherwise?

“Oh, come on Iris, that’s not true.” You sat up in your bed, “I mean, if you do come here then you’ll have plenty of opportunity to live a Julia Roberts movie. People seem to find this place so thrilling… I don’t seem to know much about love, or to really be the one to talk to about it, though…” You paused, this conversation was starting to sound too familiar. “You know, you should talk to my friend, Tom, if you come. I think you’d get along well, he gushes on about love all the time.”

She really might make good friends with him, they seemed to hold some similar beliefs.

“It is thrilling. I mean, it’s near Notting Hill,” you could hear the excitement in her voice, “I just need Hugh Grant and that’s it but…” Yeah, but. It was another thing that was out of reach. “You might come here and hate on love with my brother, he hates everything related to it.”

It didn’t come as much of a surprise to hear that yet another man hated everything related to love. It wasn’t that you thought all men did, but it did seem to be something you noticed in quite a few. And, honestly, you didn’t blame them. You were right there with them.

“Really?” You smiled, “He sounds better than most men already.”

Iris let out a laugh, “He’s not.” Big surprise.

“Aren’t siblings meant to support one another?” You asked.

She scoffed, “You’d think that. But no, he’s a man.” That was a fair point. “I don’t know who’s worse men who hate love or men who pretend to love love. Your friend is probably the second one.”

You knew what she was saying. You had been with a man that pretended to love love, sort of at least. And Tom, well, he was nothing like Danny at all.

“No, I don’t think so,” You shook your head. “He seems to really believe in it, maybe more than you.” Though you weren’t sure how he could more than her. “He’s really sweet, typically… I mean, he is a man so he has his days,” you joked.

“Oh,” she closed her eyes, “so… Right, right, but you don’t believe in love and…” whatever she was saying, you didn’t understand. “Right, right, Perfect setup, see?” What did that mean? “This town is perfect for you, nothing that has to do with romance. It’s a great way to get away from everything romance.”

You were a bit confused by her reaction, but decided to shake it off. “Then I can’t wait to go, really. I mean, it seems perfect for you here, too. You can surround yourself with things to remember the ‘fantasy’ of love again,” because that’s what it was, a fantasy. “So, are we really switching tomorrow?”

The question of the night. It still didn’t seem real, like you were just going to wake up the next day and your life would go back to normal, or whatever the new normal was going to become. Yet here you were, planning to swap houses with a… stranger?

“You think there are any flights?” Iris questioned.

“I’m sure there have to be some,” you shrugged. “Should we check?”

“Definitely.”

“Wonderful.” More like terrifying. “How long are we doing this for?”

Another thing to worry about. Overall, it wasn’t that you had this sense of panic. You felt more excited than anything if you were being honest, but a part of you recognized how irresponsible this entire situation was. Nevertheless, you pulled your laptop closer to you.

“Uh, depends, holidays are coming soon…” she made another good point. “So, even though I have no interest in spending Christmas here, what’s your idea?”

You wanted to get away. You didn’t have much family, nor did you want to gain pity from them about Danny. The entire point of leaving was to escape the basic thought of him. Tom typically had takeout with you and Danny on Christmas Eve, but that was something you could do in the states on your own if you wanted.

“Nothing is really keeping me here for it, honestly,” you said plainly.

“I’m just-- you’re okay with dogs, right?” She adjusted her camera to put a small pug in the frame. “Because little Tommy here is going to miss me.”

You smiled brightly at the puppy, “I’d love to take care of… did you say…” you held in a laugh, it was a bit funny considering, “L-little Tommy?”

“Yeah, his name is Tom.” Iris came back into frame, “He’s the only male that matters.”

“Oh, I love that.” You grinned, “I would love to trade Tom’s with you.”

She chuckled, “As long as I don’t have to feed that one.”

“I do hope that you don’t have to, he seems somewhat capable of caring for himself,” you joked. “Oh, by the way. He’ll be running my shop for me while I’m away, sometimes he stays later for work so if you hear him downstairs don’t worry.”

You had nearly forgotten to even mention that, would’ve been quite the surprise. And, you had also nearly forgotten that you would have to eventually tell Tom about this situation. Which would happen pretty soon, if you were to leave so soon. He’d surely think you were crazy.

“I probably won’t notice, honestly…” she looked off camera, “Okay so here’s a flight, can you believe there’s actually one for tomorrow?”

You scrolled around, “I found one too, shockingly enough…” Suddenly, it was real again. It was back and forth between the reality of it, and just the idea. “Are we really going through with this?”

It was a crazy plan. There wasn’t even an actual plan in place, not really.

“I think we are.” Iris sounded just as nervous you did, which was comforting in some way.

The feeling of excitement for a new beginning was what you were trying to stay focused on.

Still, you were a bit hesitant. “Well, alright then…”

“On three then….”

Were you really going through with this? It was completely crazy. When you were talking to Tom before about needing a break, this wasn’t exactly what you imagined. You seemed so nervous, and yet you continued to go through with it. You figured that it must’ve been what you truly needed.

“One…” were you really counting down?

“Two…” that was a yes, apparently.

“Three!”

It was too late to go back. You bought the ticket, it was happening. You were officially going to the States for holiday, and at Christmas no less. A part of you felt this wave of relief, while another part of you was still feeling very conflicted. But it was done, that was it. You just swapped houses with a complete stranger.

read iris’ version here

next chapter

#timothee chalamet x reader #timothée chalamet x reader #tim chalamet x reader #tom holland x reader #christmas fic #timothée chalamet imagine #timothee chalamet imagine #timothée chalamet one shot #timothee chalamet oneshot #timothée chalamet x y/n #timothee chalamet x you #timothee chalamet x y/n #timothée chalamet x you #timothée chalamet #timothee chalamet #timmy chalamet #tim chalamet

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band--psycho · 4 years ago

Text

Fred Weasley x Reader (Hurt/Comfort)-A Kiss At Sunset

A/n: My sixth entry for @girl-next-door-writes bingo challenge, I hope you enjoy!

(Credit to the photo owners)

Warnings: Talks and feelings of depression

Y/Ns POV

Depression. Some people understand it and some people just think it’s a cry for attention. For some people, it starts with a traumatic event for others there’s seemingly no reason for it. I was one of those people who fell into the later category. There was no apparent reason for her depression, it was just there. It started with feeling irritated over small things or issues, I didn’t look forward to spending time with anyone so I avoided it at every possible chance, I didn’t feel like studying at all, I just wanted to stay in my bed away from everyone. I was losing enthusiasm for life and no one really noticed because I was able to paint on a fake smile every day and act like I was fine. And if I faltered in the act I’d just tell people I was having a bad day or something like that to stop them from asking questions, I made sure to always have a book in my hand even if I wasn’t reading it.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Third Person POV

“Ladies,” Fred and George greeted Angelina and Katie in a charismatic tone as George threw his arms around the two girls.

“Morning guys,” They responded in an equally cheery tone.

“Where’s Y/n?” Fred asked, his smile faltering slightly when he couldn’t see her.

“Still in bed, she said she said she had a headache,” Katie answered, with a sympathetic smile on her face.

“Again?” He asked, remembering how often she’d used this reason recently.

“It’s probably all the studying she’s been doing,” Angelina added, with a small sigh.

“Yeah,” both of the red haired boys agreed. But something was playing on Freds mind. He had known for a while that something was wrong with Y/n, he didn’t know what but she was different now. Even when she was reading her favourite books, he noticed that her eyes wouldn’t light up the same way as they did before. Her smile wasn’t as large and carefree as it was a few months ago, it was smaller, forced. She seemed distant; normally she’d be the first to plan something to do on the weekends, the first to have the idea of throwing a party for any special occasion, Gryffindor winning a Quidditch match, finishing exams, birthdays, now if she had a day off she just stayed in her room. He needed to know what was wrong, he needed to know how to help..

“You guys go on ahead, I forgot my potions book,” Fred said quickly before turning round and heading to the common room.

~~~~~~~~

Y/Ns POV

Scrunching my eyes shut I mentally sighed as I heard the door to the room open, dread washing over me at the prospect of having to interact with another person, I wanted nothing more than to remain tucked safely beneath the covers away from the world. But it would seem I couldn’t be that lucky.Having fully expected to hear Angelina or Katie’s voice, I prepared myself to put on a smile and a cheery disposition, the very thought invoking the opposite of what I set to achieve however, but the familiar tone that filled my ears was far too masculine and low to be Angelina or Katie.

“Y/n/n,” it was gentle, but expectant. The familiar voice alluring enough that I found myself lowering the duvet from over my head. Propping myself up onto an elbow, I turned to look over my shoulder and true enough there stood Fred in the process of shutting the door, effectively locking us away from prying eyes and ears; an action which I was extremely grateful for.

“Fred? What are you doing here?” I had no doubt that the confusion was evident on my face, though with Fred I didn’t mind that he saw behind the mask I had made for myself. It was a subconscious habit of mine, one that I hated, though I knew that no matter how much effort I put into trying, he’d see the real me regardless. He always had, ever since we were young.

“Katie said you had a headache,” and there it was. His tone and expression were enough to tell me he knew it was a lie, he wasn’t buying my excuse for a second. Part of me wanted nothing more than to tell him the truth, tell him about everything I’d kept bottled up inside. I wanted to be honest with him, like we always had, but at the same time I didn’t want him thinking any less of me.

“Okay?” Maybe if I just played it cool he’d take the hint and leave me be.

“I didn’t believe her,” narrowing his eyes, I watched as he steadily closed the distance between us both.

Why couldn’t he just take the hint? It wasn’t his fault, I knew it wasn’t.

“What?” I cursed myself for how wobbly my voice was. Coming to stand by the side of my bed, crossing his arms as he studied me, his eyes searching mine for the truth.

“You always seem to have a headache recently,” he pointed out, tilting his head to the side, pressing his lips together. I could see his thoughts racing behind his eyes, mind racing to put the pieces of the puzzle together.

“Cos I’ve been reading a lot that’s all,” I mumbled, attempting to stir him away from what he was thinking but it was half hearted, even for me.

“That’s a lie and we both know it,” I noticed how his eyes grew soft, though I could also see the determination in his gestures.

“Fred I don’t know what you’re talking about,”

Please Freddie, stop, I thought to myself. I couldn’t do this. Not now, not with him...

“Yes, you do,” sighing through his nose, he watched as I pushed myself up into a sitting position, straightening out the covers to rest over my lap as I looked up at him. “You’ve been different for a while now, sadder,”

“Fred, I’m fine,” I lied. I wasn’t. I really wasn’t. All I wanted to do was curl up back into a ball, tucked away into the darkness that was offered to me whilst under the duvet. The curtains were still drawn, and finally I had some time to be alone.

“No, you’re not,” with a groan I sighed running hand through my hair in frustration, though not a moment later my head shot up at the feeling of a weight dipping the side of my bed. I just wanted him to stop...I could feel myself reaching my breaking point and the last thing I wanted to do was breakdown infront Fred.

Fred had sat himself beside me, and I could feel the tears brimming in my eyes as the following words left his mouth, “Y/n/n, I’ve known you since we were eight years old, I know when something’s wrong,”

Eyes widening, I noticed as the panic flooded over Fred for all of a few seconds as the tears cascade down my cheeks. I’d been fighting them off for so long now, pushing them aside in a desperate bid to collect myself and not breakdown.

Of course he knew, he saw me, he always had. I wasn’t used to it, Katie and Angelina, they were good friends, but they didn’t really understand me. They didn’t see behind my mask, they didn’t know anything was wrong. But Fred, he saw me, the real me, the me behind the mask I so desperately tried to hide behind.

“I can’t do this anymore Fred… I just, I feel so alone. I feel so unmotivated and, and I don’t…” not knowing how to express the overwhelming emotions, I could feel my voice trail off as the sobs took over me. My breath caught momentarily in my throat as Fred leaned forward and drew me into his embrace.I couldn’t remember the last time someone had held me, nor the last someone had looked at me- really looked at me. He pulled me into his lap and I let him, clinging onto his shirt and he does nothing but rub a hand soothingly over my back, whispering words of reassurance and comfort into my hair as my tears soak into his shirt

It felt like hours had passed, though, really it couldn’t be more than five minutes, but when I pulled away, with a trembling lip, I furiously wiped away at the tears still staining my cheeks. I felt better for getting it out of my system, but at the same time embarrassment washed over, I hated myself for breaking down on him the way I did. This is exactly what I wanted to avoid,

“I’m sorry,” I apologised, though my voice was quiet, I knew it was thick with emotion that was overflowing through me, but he seemed to hear me loud and clear. Not a second later a hand reached out to my chin, lifting my face towards him. His touch was gentle, but firm enough that I allowed the action, more out of shock

“Don’t you dare, you have absolutely nothing to apologise for.” His eyes soften as he gazes down at me, “Why didn’t you tell me?” I feel his breath fan over my face as he speaks.

“I didn’t know how, I couldn’t just randomly bring it up in conversation,” talking to someone, was so much easier said than done. And Fred, he was always so cheerful and witty, I didn’t want to bring him down, nor did I want to burden him with my feelings. Feelings that not even I could properly explain, let alone expect someone else to understand.

My gaze drops to his collar, eyes whipping away the few stray tears that I could feel running down my cheeks before I put the lid back onto my feelings, though before I could even consider it I felt him gently nudge my back.

“Come on,” he urges softly with a short nod towards the door

“Where are we going?” I asked, with a furrowed brow, turning to look at him, my eyes clearly saying what I didn’t trust my voice to ask.

“Outside,” the two syllables were enough to send pure terror into my veins, my heart skipping a beat, my mind firmly against the idea of wandering from the security that my dorm room offered.

“Fred I really don’t-”

“Don’t want to, I know but we’re going to,” brushing some stray strands of hair back from my face as he smiles down at me with a twinkle in his eye.

“Trust me,” he whispered softly, intertwining his hand with mine. I wanted to say no, part of me wanted to pull my hand away from his and go back to hiding under my duvet, but when I looked into his eyes, I felt my heart swell, knowing in my heart I was going to do what he wanted

~~~~~~~~

Third Person POV

Y/n couldn’t remember the last time she went to the lake nor the last time she watched the sunset but she couldn’t deny the beauty of the scene before her. The sun had set, but the afterglow from the sunset was continuing to flood through the sky. A mixture of ever changing shades of orange and red coloured the sky. It was breathtaking. And for the first time in a long time, Y/n was smiling. It wasn’t a fake smile, it was real and pure. She found herself feeling completely at peace with the world; the tranquility of the scene seeming to momentarily wash away the negativity she’d felt.

“It’s beautiful,” Y/n breathed.

“I thought you might like it,” Fred cooed, squeezing her hand lightly. It wasn’t until this simple action that she knew she was still holding his hand, that she hadn’t let go of his hand since they were in the common room. The pair stayed like that for a while, watching as the fiery shades of the sky faded into shades of violet.

“Thank you for bringing me here, Freddie,” she whispered, turning around slightly to hug him.

“ Anytime,” Fred whispered back, his arms wrapping around her waist, hugging her back. When the pair pulled away from the hug slightly, their eyes locked with each others; after a short time Freds eyes wandered down to her lips, his heart was beating so fast he was surprised Y/n couldn’t hear it. He wanted to kiss her. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. They’d always been close, ever since they were children but it wasn’t until last year that he began to fall for her, but he didn’t want to ruin the friendship that they’d had for so long if she didn’t feel the same. But in this moment, he felt a surge of bravery he hadn’t felt before, so he leaned down to kiss her but as he did so, she pulled away.

“Are you sure?” Y/n asked, the anxiety evident in her voice as her eyes flicked between his lips and his dreamy brown eyes.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything, love.” she couldn’t deny the way her heart fluttered as his soothingly soft voice said those words. He delicately moved his hand to her face, reassuringly caressing her cheek as he closed the gap between the two of them. As soon as his lips touched hers she felt like all time had stopped, instantly reciprocating his actions and kissing him back. A mixture of giddiness and passion erupted in the kiss, their lips moulding together in perfect synchronisation. A joyful smile was on both of their faces when they pulled away from the kiss, placing their foreheads together.

“You’re not alone anymore, love. I’m always going to be here for you and I’m always going to love you,” his words were not just a declaration of love, but a promise also. A promise that no matter how dark the days seemed, he was always going to be by her side, whether she needed to cry, scream or just sit in silence, he would be there with her, he would remind her every day how strong and brilliant she was. And that gave her hope, hope that her darkest days might not be so dark anymore with him at her side.

Tagging those who might be interested:

@loony-loopy-lupinn @probably-peeves @darthwheezely @whizboingies @xacatapelsyx @sassycatlady99 @itstatigallegos @ohmyitsfaith @gcdric

#Girl Next Door’s Make Me Feel Bingo #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley x oc #fred x oc #fred weasley fluff #fred weasley imagines #fred wealey x y/n #fred weasley x original female character #fred weasley x you #fred weasley #harry potter era imagine #harry potter era x reader #hp imagine #hp era imagines #hp fred weasley

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