#Condiments industry

[tubetrading]

Apple Cider Vinegar and Your Metabolism:  A Natural Way to Boost Your Energy

Apple cider vinegar (ACV) has gained significant popularity as a natural health booster.  From aiding digestion to supporting weight management, this versatile condiment is packed with benefits.  Among its many advantages, its impact on metabolism stands out, making it a go-to choice for health-conscious individuals.  If you are looking to understand how apple cider vinegar can enhance your energy levels, you are in the right place.  As a leading apple vinegar manufacturer in India, Modern Food Products brings you insights into the power of this golden elixir.

The Science Behind Apple Cider Vinegar and Metabolism

Metabolism refers to the chemical processes your body uses to convert food into energy.  An efficient metabolism helps maintain energy levels, supports weight management, and keeps your body functioning optimally.  Apple cider vinegar contains acetic acid, which plays a key role in boosting metabolic processes.

1.         Improved Blood Sugar Regulation

One of the primary ways apple cider vinegar influences metabolism is by improving blood sugar regulation.  It helps slow down the absorption of carbohydrates, preventing sudden spikes and crashes in blood sugar levels.  This stabilizes energy levels throughout the day.

2.         Enhanced Fat Burning

Studies suggest that apple cider vinegar can promote fat burning by activating specific enzymes that break down fats.  This makes it an excellent addition to your diet if you are aiming to manage weight while staying energetic.

3.         Support for Digestive Health

Healthy digestion is critical for efficient metabolism.  Apple cider vinegar boosts the production of stomach acids, aiding in the breakdown of food and improving nutrient absorption.  As a key product offered by food processing companies in Gujarat, ACV is increasingly valued for its digestive benefits.

How to Incorporate Apple Cider Vinegar into Your Diet

Integrating apple cider vinegar into your daily routine is easy and versatile.  Here are some popular ways to enjoy its benefits:

Morning Detox Drink:  Mix one tablespoon of apple cider vinegar with a glass of warm water and a dash of honey.

Salad Dressings:  Use ACV as a tangy ingredient in your salad dressings for a flavorful and healthy boost.

Cooking:  Add it to marinades, soups, and sauces to enhance flavors while reaping its benefits.

As an apple cider vinegar supplier in UAE, Modern Food Products offers high-quality ACV that is perfect for culinary and health applications.

Private Labeling Opportunities in Vadodara

With the growing demand for apple cider vinegar, businesses are exploring opportunities to introduce their own branded products.  At Modern Food Products, we offer private labeling services in Vadodara, enabling businesses to market premium-quality apple cider vinegar under their brand names.  Our expertise in the food processing industry in Vadodara ensures that every product meets stringent quality standards.

Why Choose Modern Food Products?

As one of the best food product companies in Vadodara, Modern Food Products stands out for its commitment to quality, innovation, and customer satisfaction.  Here is what sets us apart:

State-of-the-Art Facilities:  Our advanced manufacturing unit in Vadodara enables us to produce high-quality apple cider vinegar efficiently.

Custom Solutions:  From private labelling to bulk supply, we cater to diverse business needs.

Global Reach:  As a trusted apple cider vinegar exporter in United Arab Emirates, we ensure timely delivery and exceptional service for our international clients.

The Role of Food Processing in Enhancing Apple Cider Vinegar’s Benefits

The food processing industry in Vadodara plays a crucial role in maximizing the health benefits of apple cider vinegar.  By employing advanced techniques, Modern Food Products ensures that our ACV retains its natural properties while meeting global quality standards.  This dedication makes us one of the leading food processing companies in Gujarat and a preferred condiments manufacturer in India.

Health Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar Beyond Metabolism

While boosting metabolism is a key benefit, apple cider vinegar offers a range of additional health advantages:

1.         Supports Weight Management

ACV helps curb appetite and promotes a feeling of fullness, aiding in weight management efforts.

2.         Promotes Heart Health

Regular consumption of ACV can improve cholesterol levels and support heart health.

3.         Boosts Immunity

Rich in antioxidants and antimicrobial properties, apple cider vinegar strengthens the immune system.

4.         Enhances Skin Health

When used topically, ACV can help balance skin pH and reduce acne.

The Future of Apple Cider Vinegar in the Health Industry

The demand for natural health products like apple cider vinegar is growing rapidly.  As a top food manufacturing company in Vadodara, we are committed to meeting this demand with innovative and high-quality offerings.  Our position as a trusted food company in Gujarat reflects our dedication to excellence in the food processing companies in India.

Partnering with Modern Food Products

Whether you are a retailer looking for a reliable apple cider vinegar supplier in UAE or a brand exploring private labeling services in Vadodara, Modern Food Products is your go-to partner.  With our expertise as a leading apple vinegar manufacturer in India, we deliver products that align with your business goals and customer expectations.

Conclusion

Apple cider vinegar is more than just a condiment; it is a powerhouse of health benefits that can transform your metabolism and energy levels.  By choosing high-quality apple cider vinegar from a trusted condiments manufacturer in India like Modern Food Products, you can ensure optimal results for your health and business needs.

Modern Food Products’ commitment to quality, innovation, and customer satisfaction makes us the preferred choice for clients worldwide.  Whether you need a reliable apple cider vinegar exporter in United Arab Emirates or are looking to leverage private labeling services in Vadodara, we are here to help.

Boost your metabolism naturally with premium apple cider vinegar from Modern Food Products.  Contact us today to learn more about our offerings and how we can support your journey to health and success.

[marutiagrifoods]

Food product company in Gujarat | mfpindia

MFP Products Private Limited – A leading name in the food processing industry in Vadodara. As a renowned food product company in Gujarat, we specialize in crafting high-quality condiments and dips that elevate every dish. Our expertise as a cheese jalapeno dip manufacturer in India ensures a rich, creamy, and flavorful experience in every bite. Committed to excellence, we are a trusted condiments manufacturer in India, delivering premium products that cater to global tastes.

Partner with MFP Products for top-tier food solutions that redefine taste and quality.

[entailglobal]

Why India is the hub of manufacturing and export for mango sliced pickle

India has long been renowned for its rich culinary heritage, and among its most famous condiments, mango sliced pickle holds a special place.  With its bold flavors, authentic spices, and traditional preparation methods, Indian mango sliced pickle has gained immense popularity worldwide.  Over the years, India has emerged as the leading mango sliced pickle manufacturer in India and exporter, supplying high-quality pickles to global markets.  But what makes India the ultimate hub for mango sliced pickle exporter businesses?  Let us explore the factors that contribute to India’s dominance in this industry.

1.  Abundant Availability of High-Quality Mangoes

India is the world's largest producer of mangoes, accounting for nearly 50% of global production.  The country is home to over 1,000 varieties of mangoes, including Alphonso, Kesar, Totapuri, and Rajapuri, which are widely used for pickle manufacturing.  The rich agricultural heritage and favorable climate provide the perfect environment for growing high-quality mangoes, making India a natural leader in mango pickle production.

2.  Expertise in Traditional and Modern Food Processing Techniques

The food processing industry in Vadodara and other parts of India has evolved significantly, blending traditional methods with advanced processing techniques.  Indian manufacturers adhere to time-tested recipes while incorporating modern food safety standards and technology to ensure consistency, hygiene, and superior taste.  Companies specializing in food processing companies in Gujarat leverage advanced machinery and stringent quality control measures to produce pickles that meet international standards.

3.  Rising Global Demand for Indian Condiments

The global demand for Indian condiments, particularly mango sliced pickle, has seen a steady rise.  The unique taste and authentic flavors of Indian pickles make them a favorite among international consumers.  This growing demand has encouraged food manufacturing companies to scale up production and expand their reach in global markets.  Many food processing companies in India now cater to the increasing demand by offering private labeling services and customized packaging for international clients.

4.  Strong Presence of Food Processing Hubs in Gujarat and Vadodara

Gujarat, particularly Vadodara, has emerged as a significant hub for the food processing industry.  The state boasts a large number of food product companies in Gujarat, offering a wide range of processed foods, including pickles, sauces, and condiments.  With well-established infrastructure, access to raw materials, and government support, Gujarat has become the preferred destination for businesses looking to invest in the food processing industry in Vadodara.

Additionally, Vadodara is home to some of the best food product company in India that specialize in the manufacturing and export of pickles.  These companies provide private labelling services in Vadodara, enabling global brands to source high-quality mango sliced pickles under their own labels, further solidifying India's reputation as a leading supplier of pickled products.

5.  Competitive Pricing and Cost-Effective Production

The cost of production in India is relatively lower compared to other countries, thanks to the availability of raw materials, low labor costs, and efficient manufacturing processes.  This cost advantage allows mango sliced pickle manufacturer in India to offer competitive pricing in international markets without compromising on quality.  As a result, Indian exporters can supply bulk orders at reasonable rates, making them the preferred choice for businesses worldwide.

6.  Government Initiatives Supporting the Food Processing Sector

The Indian government has introduced several initiatives to boost the food processing industry.  Schemes such as the Pradhan Mantri Kisan Sampada Yojana (PMKSY) and the Make in India initiative have encouraged investment in food manufacturing and export.  These policies have helped strengthen India's position as a top mango sliced pickle exporter, providing financial aid, tax benefits, and infrastructure development for food processing businesses.

7.  Rising Popularity of Private Labeling Services

Many international brands rely on Indian manufacturers for their private label food products.  Private labelling services in Vadodara have gained traction, allowing businesses to customize their packaging and branding while sourcing high-quality pickles from leading Indian producers.  This trend has further fueled the growth of India’s mango pickle industry, as companies in the list of food industries in Vadodara continue to expand their export operations.

8.  Adherence to International Quality Standards

Food safety and quality assurance play a crucial role in the export market.  Indian condiments manufacturer in India adhere to global food safety standards such as FSSAI, ISO, HACCP, and BRC, ensuring that their products meet the highest quality benchmarks.  This adherence to quality control has strengthened India’s reputation as a reliable supplier of mango sliced pickles to countries like the USA, UK, UAE, Canada, and Australia.

9.  Expanding E-commerce and Global Retail Networks

With the rise of e-commerce and online grocery platforms, Indian food product company in Gujarat have found new ways to reach international consumers.  Many brands are now exporting their mango sliced pickles directly through online marketplaces, catering to the growing demand for authentic Indian flavors across the globe.  This digital transformation has made it easier for international buyers to source Indian pickles, boosting the country’s export potential.

Conclusion

India’s dominance in the mango sliced pickle manufacturing and export industry is the result of a combination of factors—abundant raw materials, expertise in food processing, cost-effective production, and strong government support.  The well-established food processing industry in Vadodara, along with the presence of leading food manufacturing companies, has positioned India as the global hub for mango pickle production.

With increasing global demand, advancements in technology, and the rising popularity of private labelling services in Vadodara, the future of India’s mango sliced pickle industry looks promising.  As international markets continue to embrace Indian flavors, the country’s role as the leading mango sliced pickle exporter is set to grow even further, making it an indispensable player in the global food industry.

[ippinka]

This  Versatile Cutlery Rest can be used as a condiment dish or as a spoon rest in between bites. It is also perfect for serving small side dishes, desserts, and appetizers.

[sudiptaam]

Global Hot Sauce Market Outlook (2024–2035): Embracing Spicy Flavors

The Hot Sauce Market was valued at USD 3.72 billion in 2024 and is projected to reach USD 8.16 billion by 2035, growing at a CAGR of 7.4% between 2025 and 2035. citeturn0search1 This market encompasses a variety of spicy condiments made primarily from chili peppers, vinegar, and spices, catering to a global palate that increasingly favors bold and spicy flavors.

Full report: https://www.metatechinsights.com/industry-insights/hot-sauce-market-1382

[lykaglobal9]

Best PET Sheet Supplier for Food and Beverage Packaging Worldwide: Lyka Global Plast 

When it comes to food and beverage packaging, quality, durability, and safety are paramount. Packaging not only preserves the freshness and taste of the products but also ensures they reach the consumer in perfect condition. In this domain, Lyka Global Plast has emerged as a trusted name, providing premium PET sheets that cater to the diverse needs of the global food and beverage industry. Renowned for its commitment to quality and innovation, Lyka Global Plast stands as the best PET sheet supplier for food and beverage packaging worldwide. 

Why Choose PET Sheets for Food and Beverage Packaging? 

PET (Polyethylene Terephthalate) sheets have become the preferred choice for packaging in the food and beverage industry due to their superior properties. They are lightweight, transparent, and provide excellent barrier protection against moisture, oxygen, and other external contaminants. PET sheets are also highly durable, making them ideal for protecting food and beverages from damage during transportation and storage. Additionally, they are recyclable, making them an environmentally responsible choice for businesses committed to sustainability. 

Lyka Global Plast: A Leader in PET Sheet Supply 

Lyka Global Plast has established itself as a leader in the PET sheet supply industry, offering high-quality PET sheets specifically designed for food and beverage packaging. Here’s why Lyka Global Plast stands out as the best PET sheet supplier: 

1. Uncompromised Quality Standards 

At Lyka Global Plast, quality is the cornerstone of every product. The company uses only the finest raw materials and employs advanced manufacturing processes to ensure that each PET sheet meets the highest standards of quality and safety. Rigorous quality control measures are implemented at every stage of production, from raw material sourcing to final inspection, to guarantee products that are free from defects and contaminants. 

2. Innovative Packaging Solutions 

Lyka Global Plast is at the forefront of innovation, constantly developing new solutions to meet the evolving needs of the food and beverage industry. Their PET sheets are designed to offer superior clarity, ensuring that packaged products look appealing on store shelves. Additionally, their PET sheets are highly customizable, allowing clients to choose from various thicknesses, colors, and finishes to suit their specific packaging requirements. 

3. Global Reach and Reliable Supply Chain 

With a well-established global distribution network, Lyka Global Plast ensures timely delivery of PET sheets to clients worldwide. The company has built strong partnerships with key players in the food and beverage industry, providing them with consistent, high-quality PET sheets for various packaging applications. Their reliable supply chain management ensures that customers receive their orders on time, regardless of their location. 

4. Commitment to Sustainability 

Lyka Global Plast is deeply committed to sustainability and environmentally responsible practices. Their PET sheets are fully recyclable, contributing to reduced plastic waste and promoting a circular economy. By choosing Lyka Global Plast, businesses in the food and beverage industry can align themselves with sustainable packaging practices without compromising on quality or performance. 

5. Exceptional Customer Support 

Customer satisfaction is a top priority at Lyka Global Plast. The company offers exceptional customer support, assisting clients in selecting the right PET sheets for their packaging needs. Their team of experts provides valuable insights and guidance, ensuring that each client receives a tailored packaging solution that enhances product appeal and shelf life. 

Conclusion 

For businesses in the food and beverage industry seeking the best packaging solutions, Lyka Global Plast is the ultimate partner. As a leading PET sheet supplier, Lyka Global Plast combines top-tier quality, innovation, sustainability, and excellent customer support to deliver unmatched packaging solutions worldwide. Choose Lyka Global Plast for your food and beverage packaging needs and experience the difference that quality and expertise make. 

[punitproteins]

Leading Food Processing Company in Gujarat | mfpindia

Discover Modern Food Products, a top-tier food processing company in Gujarat, at the heart of Vadodara's thriving food processing industry. We specialize in high-quality food processing solutions, setting industry standards for innovation and excellence.

[writersdrug]

My brain is open to your bartender Ghost thoughts

Give me them all 🙏

Lordy this au isn't even an hour old and I have so many thoughts

He doesn't really know what to expect when you come in the morning after the interview. At eight am sharp, he watches as you trudge inside, wearing ripped tights, shorts, knock off combat boots, and a baggy shirt that's messily tucked into your waistline. It looks like you had put on eye liner last night and gone to bed, black lines smudged in a perfect "bedhead" look.

"Really?" He asks, arms folded and muscles buddging. "Come t' the interview in a skirt 'n dress shirt, n' show up t' the first shift lookin' like a wannabe biker chick?"

You scoff, pulling your hair up into a bun. "Didn't realize I'd be walking into the asscrack of "The Devil Wears Prada"..."

He huffs and shakes his head. You hve tough skin - good.

He had Soap come in early that day - poor man usually worked between 4 pm 'til whenever Ghost decided to close. He's still rubbing his eyes and yawning when a pen and spiral notepad are shoved into your hands, Simon pushing you towards towards the cook's table with a hand on your back.

"Hey, welcome to the 141." You say, no attempt at politeness in your tone. Ghost huffs fondly, appreciating how you cut through the bullshit. "Any appetizers today?"

"None o' that keech," Soap says, squeezing his eyes shut and pinching his brow. "Canna have a rusty nail 'n th' smash grunded, wel doon 'n with the bun scud - cannae stand th' aoli. Chips oan the side."

You stare at him, eyes wide in disbelief, before turning to Ghost. "Do they all sound like that?"

He grunts. "If they're drunk."

"Are you drunk?" You ask Soap.

"Feck if I know, tryin' tae figure it oot myself." He groans.

Ghost helps you decipher the words Soap had vomited out. You successfully punch it into the POS, only needing a few pointers from the giant over your shoulder. For the rest of the morning amd afternoon, he taeaches you which button on the soda gun was which, the difference between tonic water and club soda, how to run the industrial sanitizer - with a "ye best make sure that shite is rinsed 'fore ye stick em in there" from Soap - where the new kegs go when Gaz brings them in, where to find napkins and condiments in the walkin, how to cut fruit for the bar, and lastly, how to split your tips.

"But why do I have to pay you?" You ask Ghost, sitting at a table with your calculator app on your phone and a basket of fries between the two of you. "You make loads of tips just pouring liquor."

He chuckles, watching you pop a fry into your mouth. "'N you get a cut of sales from the kitchen, since you're part of it."

You perk up at that. "I do?"

"Seven percent." He confirms. "A decent payout on weekends."

"And Soap doesn't get tips."

"Johnny boy gets paid by th' hour."

"I don't?"

"If ya do well enough, ya won't have to." He says, resting his meaty forearms on the table. "You'll be walkin' out with hundreds."

You chew your lip nervously; Simon's eyes linger on the movement, shifting his weight - the polyester seat creaks beneath him as he observes you fretting silently, the silence only broken by the sound of Soap prepping in the kitchen. "Don' worry too much 'bout it. You're young - jus' keep a smile on 'n you'll be fine. Soap 'n I got your back tonight, but I'm not pickin' up your slack after the week passes."

The fry you're steering towards your mouth falls to the table as Simon stands up. "Tonight?!" You exclaim, shimmying out of the booth.

"Yep. Sixteen hundred."

You glance at your phone. "That's in an hour!" There are kegs stacked by the front door, unpolished and enrolled silverware on the bar top, and half of the chairs are still stacked on the countertops.

"Best get to work then, hmm?" Ghost says, grabbing a container of lemons and moving behind the bar.

[hurtspideyparker]

Thinking about restless spirit Tony Stark who just can't move on to the after life.

The first thing he does once he realizes he's an apparition is check on Pepper and Morgan. True to their word, they're okay. He watches them for a bit but feels this deep unrest pulling him away from the quaint home he yearns for.

There's a deep wrongness within him, some unfinished business that draws him back to New York.

He fears for a moment that it's Peter- but no, it can't be him. He'll be in Massachusetts right now, attending MIT as a freshman. There isn't a doubt in Tony's mind that his little genius is already making his mark.

Still, he follows the pull of his spirit to some dingy Queens' apartment he's never been to before.

It's deep in the night yet the apartment is empty. He looks around a bit, his body phasing through anything he attempts to touch.

It's small and dirty. There's old coffee cups on the desk, alongside a couple GED manuals. Great, the universe thinks he has unfinished business with some broke high school dropout.

He's pondering how he must have screwed up this kid's life; was it the Avengers, Stark Industries? Maybe his old playboy lifestyle is finally coming to bite him in the ass.

His contemplation is cut short by the sound of the window cracking open.

It strikes Tony for a moment that maybe he's stuck on Earth to be a guardian angel, Iron Man living on as some invisible protector against whatever creep is sneaking into people's windows. It doesn't make much sense considering the whole non-corporeal thing, but he still stiffens like he's ready for a fight.

He sees a man- no, a thing? A creature maybe, or an alien. Even in death Tony can't escape being one of Earth's mightiest heroes.

The creature is shrouded in darkness, something slick and bald crawling inside the room with terrifying grace and silence. It shuts the window with a soft kssssh as the seal is formed.

And then it pulls off its mask.

There, with the click of a table lamp, glows the face of Peter Parker.

He's definitely older now; sturdier shoulders, a rugged set of his jaw, hair tamed to something semi-professional. Still present, though, are those gentle brown eyes.

Nothing makes sense right now. Why is his kid here, in this apartment? Surely May wouldn't allow this. How many tenant laws does this place break? Where are his little sidekick friends? And on what planet would Peter Parker ever need a GED?

Tony's getting angry now, watching Peter move around the tiny space. He changes out of his costume and into pajamas. That spider suit isn't Tony's suit, it looks like cheap craft store fabric.

The kid opens a small freezer and pulls out the singular bag of peas that reside in there, pressing it against his ribs while he goes to pop some bread into a toaster.

Tony takes note of every glimpse he gains into Peter's life. Empty cabinets when he reaches for a jar of peanut butter. A fridge housing nothing but condiments and energy drinks when he goes to grab jam. A drawer with two spoons, no forks, and a paring knife which he pulls out and sticks into the strawberry jam jar just as the toast pops.

This is all so wrong.

Tony's outrage is coming to a rolling boil. Peter deserves the world- he was gonna give him the world. He couldn't wait to send Peter to MIT and show him off as his protégé. Tony was gonna fund his projects, tease him about pretty girls, maybe even see him step back from Spider-Man and act like a normal college kid. He wanted to see him flourish and grow up. It was all he could think about when Peter turned to dust between his fingers; he should be goofing off with his friends at a mathletes meeting, or building Legos, not fighting an intergalactic war.

Tony couldn't even conceive how much went wrong to end up here.

Alone. Broke. No school. He didn't even have his Stark suit to protect him. Everything that made him him has been stripped, leaving him in this shallow box with scuffed paint and hollow cabinets.

Tony can feel the violent rage burn deep in his spirit as he thinks about it.

This is why he's here. He can't let his boy live like this, wasting his potential to be some villain's punching bag. Where is everyone? Does no one care enough to stop this? The fury that builds in Tony is dangerous, wondering why a dead man is the only one who cares about the teen's life right now.

Without thinking Tony's hand reaches for the GED textbook, a mocking piece of work that laughs in his face, and throws it at the stupid little kitchenette that's mere feet from the bed.

It sails across the room with surprising speed before it's met with a thunk against Peter's palm, hand reaching out to catch it from the air before it collided with the toaster.

Oh.

Peter sets the book down and immediately picks up his web shooters, eyes darting furiously to every corner of the tiny apartment.

"Who's there?"

Tony steps a little closer but Peter's eyes just look right past him.

"C'mon Pete, c'mon. I'm here, I'm right here."

Tony looks for something else to grab. He swats at a hopefully empty coffee cup on the wooden desk, but his hand just passes right through it.

"Shit," the hope Tony felt waivers slightly and he tries again.

Nothing.

Peter is searching his apartment now, making sure the window is secure and feeling around every crevice, bookshelves, under the bed, in the top corners of the room. Searching for something nefarious, tech maybe.

Tony hits the cup, again and again, frustration building up and up and up till-

The cup flies across the room, Tony and Peter's eyes track its movements as it bounces against the ground and rolls to a stop.

"Shit," Peter breathes out.

Tony walks up to Peter now, standing before him.

"Figure it out. Think kid, you've met aliens, gods, magicians, surely ghosts aren't too far fetched."

Peter closes his eyes. His posture straightens, Tony watches him take a deep breath in as the hairs on his bare arms stand on end.

Peter's eyes blink open, and they're looking directly at Tony.

Tony smirks, "that's it."

Peter turns around and picks the cup off the ground, running to his desk with it and ripping a piece of lined paper out of a notebook and scribbling furiously on it.

Tony walks over as Peter places the cup in the center of the paper.

On the left is the word YES in bold print, NO on the right.

"Okay, okay okay. So, move the cup if, if you wanna talk. Um, is there someone in the room right now?"

Tony reaches for the cup, an intense glare as his fingertips graze it gently. It shifts minutely towards the YES.

"Shit! Shit. Sorry, whew. Okay. Are you friendly?"

Tony moves it to YES again.

"Are you a, um. Person? Like not an alien?"

YES.

"Are you wearing tech, invisibility suit or your molecules are uncalibrated or maybe it's a portal thing like, multiverse shit is happening again, a mirror universe! Oh, maybe a..."

Tony let's a frustrated sign. The kid is too practical, logical. He needs to think like a non-genius.

"... could be. Or, or maybe you're just a ghost-"

Tony perks up and immediately swats the cup, causing it to fly off the desk towards the YES.

"Oh. Oh that's... kinda normal. Or maybe really weird? I mean... I certainly have some ghosts in my past."

Peter picks the cup up and puts it back on the desk.

"Do I know you?"

YES.

"You said you were friendly, and I'm not getting any danger tingles from you. I'm gonna start with people I know are dead, cuz I just really hope you're not a... new ghost. Um. M-May?"

The boy's voice cracks on the word and Tony freezes. May is dead? Tony starts to fear that things are a lot more wrong than he previously thought.

Peter's breath catches and Tony realizes he's waiting, dying for an answer, and quickly pokes the cup towards NO.

Peter's shoulders sag.

"Uncle Ben?"

NO.

"T- Mr. Stark?"

Tony grins, "now we're getting somewhere!"

YES.

Tony is going to have his work cut out for him, but being here with Peter just feels right.

Peter breaks out into a matching smile.

"Wow, okay. I think I'm gonna need more paper," he says as the boy gets to work making a more complex system than YES and NO.

Tony watches on proudly, reminiscing about all the great Peter was and all the great he still is, despite his situation. Whatever this is, they'll figure it out.

Together.

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

What are the skellies favorite food (besides condiments) ? Main 10 pls

Undertale Sans - Burgers & fries. He could never get enough of them and he's always happy when he has some!

Undertale Papyrus - Oatmeal with dinosaur eggs. He has also an addiction to tiramisu.

Underswap Sans - Honey candies, ironically. Turns out that when they're made with real honey and not bullshit industrial shit, it's really, really good.

Underswap Papyrus - Whatever Blue begs him to please not eat in the fridge.

Underfell Sans - Pizza. He discovered humans are hundred of varieties of them and now he's going crazy about it. He doesn't even have to do them anymore, there's place doing them for him!

Underfell Papyrus - Lasagnas with spinach and ricotta. Edge doesn't like meat but vegetables were really expensive Underground. He's learning to eat again.

Horrortale Sans - Everything homemade. He is not difficult as long as it's good.

Horrortale Papyrus - Everything homemade and without meat. Meat makes him sick, just seeing it gives him a stomachache.

Swapfell Sans - Anything with expensive coffee inside is fine. Nox is very difficult to please anyway.

Swapfell Papyrus - Chicken McNugget. He got so betrayed when they gave him a veggie version once. How dare.

Fellswap Gold Sans - Frozen veggies. You read that right. He doesn't warm them. He eats them frozen.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - CAKES. ALL TYPE OF CAKES. WITH CHOCOLATE.

[phoenixfire-thewizardgoddess]

Silly little headcannon:

Demons / sinners can't have salt because it's one of those pure substances that could dispel them.

It's also a punishment for sinners who enjoyed basic flavour in their meals. Other spices can be obtained in some form, more or less, often smuggled across rings from wrath or gluttony where the main farms can be found.

A few people hankering for Spice get The Real Thing - smuggled by the hellborn who went to earth. It was a very expensive desire to cultivate.

And there was always one idiot who thought that the salt thing was just superstition and asked for it. At this point the hellborn no longer argue, just make a vague your funeral statement, and give the item over.

Can it kill them? If you chug the bottle, sure.

Is it similar to drinking bleach? Yeah. Parts start to melt like they're trapped in an acid rainstorm starting from the inside out.

Sometimes it can warp how they reform. And it's a bitch and a half if you get it on your skin... burns like acid and won't stop til you get it all off.

So imagine if you will, that there's a hell alternative, sourced from the oceans of envy in Leviathan's realm. Supposedly off limits and out of reach to sinners because, well, fuck em that's why.

They're meant to be punished and Lucifer was pretty pissed with the whole cohort so he banned their access centuries back. Only Zestial recalls being able to cook with flavour...

Rumours say he ddid it in response to Lillith's rebellion and the inners that inspired it. Others believe, like the foolish romantic things they are, that Lucifer's life became bland without his Queen and wanted the rest of the Sinners to understand his pain, to know what they cost him.

All utter twaddle, really.

No one ever considers that perhaps it's just Like That here. After all... there's a lot of similar things in hell to their earth counterparts -like chimkin and pyork; hellborn dont know any different but sinners do.

That's the cruelty, that they can have something Like but not close enough. And without salt... a lot of those recipes you would eventually cave and try to make, just for a moecule of serotonin in the pits of literal despair... would be off.

Unless you pay for deliveries from another rings' business and the import taxes could bankrupt someone unwary, that is. Despair was a hell of a currency... and didn't the Vees and the other financially minded overlords know it. Not to mention more industrious hellborne.

Or, unless you had Connections.

One of the little thrills of being at the Hazbin Hotel was Charlotte unknowingly gifting the sinners (staff and guests alike) all access to Envy salt. She didn't see the big deal, and was caught off guard when Angel said that having the condiment available for every meal, was better than any rimjob he'd had in the last four decades.

Vaggie had hurled a plate like a discus at the man, aiming to remove his revolting mouth at the neck, but he'd caught it in a spare arm. Grinning at her.

"Admit it toots, you missed it too. Though I'm not sure how cause, seriously, ya whole attitude is salty." Dissolving into dorky laughter as her anger wavered into begrudging amusement.

"Oh shut up. But uh, we still got salt in Heaven, and there's always been some in the hotel... so I never really got a chance to miss it. "

Charlie interjects, confused in the way she had of being sincerely curious and obliviously privileged. "What do you mean? Aunties Levi and Levy sell it cheap to the other rings. Why wouldn't you have salt?"

Sensing a chance to educate and be a bit of a bastard about the king, Alastor interjects. "Why, my dear, haven't you heard your father decreed that Leviathan salt is banned to sinners? Its a silly little punishment designed to distress, because without it a number of meals that remind one of home just miss the mark. Insidious... i would almost be impressed if it was employed by anyone else."

Charlie deflates.

"Chin up, at least there's some here to bring something to the table. Unfortunately the spices are running a tad low so Husker will have to go and see if there's any of our dear hellborn contacts available to pop up to earth for a shopping spree "

"Wait, I can get dad to make us some?"

"And let him poison us? No thank you dear. You would absolutely survive anything he hides in the spice, he would make certain, but you know quite well sinners mean nothing to him."

"Thaaaaaaat's not... entirely true. He wouldn't kill you or make you sick deliberately, I dont think."

"He is the devil my dear Charlotte, and you know he will do anything to keep you safe from whatever he perceives as harm. Including even such innocuous creatures as dear Niffty."

Said sinner was being stopped from eating her plate by Angel and Husk. They were offering nonceramic options to limited success.

"Smiles, little help here?"

"Niffty, do drop that and I shall let you have the liver of the next sinner I hunt. You may adorn it with your beloved ketchup all you wish and I shan't even point out how it ruins the flavour, even once!"

Her pupil expands ominously. She squeals and drops the plate.

"Delightful. Now if you'll excuse me, Im afraid Carmilla wants a meeting with us about ensuring all the weaponry was returned. Vagatha, do you wish to come see your mentor?"

"Not my name..." she grumbles, following after with less hostility than she might have shown previously.

....

Charlie is left to wonder after why her father would make it so hard to cook non-bland foods.

He, after arriving to the dining area with great flair, explains that why not? It's meant to be a punishment. The memory of never quite tasting things the same as they were remembered and the despair of trying anyway was a punishment sinners enforced on themselves.

Charlie snaps that it wasn't okay, and that even little kindnesses like a positive memory of life reinforced through a good meal, could be instrumental for changing a sinner for the better.

Lucifer points out that no amount of paprika sprinkled on a sinner corpse was going to redeem her pet overlord or his friend Rhododendron.

Charlie pushes back saying it just might. How would he know? Had he tried before?

Her father pauses, considering, and she really should have paid attention to that odd expression as he asks if Al put her up to asking.

Charlie rolls her eyes. No, but he did do most of the cooking and he'd mentioned that the spices were low.

Ugh, the fucker was cooking for them? Are they sure it was really pyork and not sinner? Lucifer's disgust was obvious. Of course he'd eaten sinner before, eternity was a long time and you wanted to try new things on occasion. But it wasn't a, you know, hankering. A Need.

Charlie countered easily, if with a thread of frustration in the tone. Yes dad, they were very sure. Al cooked lots of stuff, not just sinner... and hey, even Lucifer had enjoyed some of the meals.

The king had to begrudgingly give him that. He cracks his knuckles, having an awful funny little idea. "Well, if that's the case and you trust him, I suppose theres no choice but to wa-bam! Spices restocked and a few new ones added! Straight from Earth to our pantry... let's see what the snarky fucker thinks about that."

Charlie beams at ber dad, hopeful that someday the pair might be friends... but understanding that it would be a matter of one small concession at a time.

....

Later, after the intrepid duo of Alastor and Vaggie returned from Carmilla's fortress of a territory, having been thoroughly negotiated with for future use of the steel... and royal favour if possible, the pair seem to head tiredly for the main sitting area.

Charlie greets them at the door like a labrador bursting with love for an owner that left an hour ago and they just weren't sure the person was ever coming back. Out of the kindness of her heart, Charlie offers to cook; and the overlord finds he suddenly has a burst of new energy, because no. Not again.

Niffty had just gotten the last attempt off the high vaulted ceilings.

Angel, lounging about on a rare day off, offered to help make something. He was struggling to find non drug and alcohol related activities now he had free time. And you could only play with yourself so many times in a day when it was what you did for work yknow?

Cherri was blowing up his phone with party deets, begging him to come over and play... and he was being so brave about it.

The sound of music filled the kitchen, helping a little. Filling in the gaps in his brain where the Wants crept in with sound. His twitchy hands put to use grabbing out equipment and ingredients as Al instructed.

Cooking was easy enough and soothing for the spider sinner. He cant recall what they were making, just followed instructions to peel and dice and cut as Al did his showmans patter over the music. Some truly insane stories from decades back in Hell and something about a sinner who sounded like Vox absolutely going face first into the pavement. The deer was a riot when he got going, and wasn't aiming his anger at you.

It felt... warm.

Well, hell always was, but this... cooking with someone always reminded Angel of his life before. Cooking was a whole experience if the family was together and had time. That's just how the bonded... well, 'cept dad and arackniss. Idiots got it into their head not to joint he family in the kitchen... as if every other guy in the other Families wasn't proudly cooking upa storm. They should've been embarrassed to miss out!

He notes the now overflowing spice rack and points it out to Al. Angel can't help the small grin as he sees those floofy red ears flick back in obvious agitated indignation, before they are forcefully corrected by the overlord.

Big bad fluffy ass adorable overlord. Betcha Al still thought the rest of the hotel didn't know about his tail... eh, let him keep his fragile sense of dignity. Angel'd trade his four best vibrators for a pat, though. Needed to know if it was anywhere near as soft as it looked.

That he knew was a secret, the kind you didn't snitch about to nobody. Al still didn't seem to realise it was Angel and Husk who'd found him a bloody mess after the new place opened, when that fake smile finally thinned and he'd passed out near his room. Lucky for the stubborn deer that they'd been keeping an eye 'cause Husk (the grumpy softie) felt something was wrong and followed him at a distance. Spooky Jnr (the shadow) had actually been hovering anxiously the whole time and practically came to get the not-so-subtle stalkers when Al had collapsed. They'd dagged the overlord into the new radio tower, yanked off the sodden layers, and given the idiot some actual first aid.

Husk had looked conflicted for a moment, just a fraction of a second there, and Angel kept thinking about if he'd have had the strength to gently clean, stitch and bandage his own overlord if the chance to let them die came up. He wants to think he'd show that same compassion... but Al wasn't Valentino, and thank fuck for that, so Angel knows he'd find a way to smother the moth bastard if he was ever that lucky.

Still, he now knew about the tail. Husk'd played it off like he'd been the only person to help when the near-delirious and panicked deer snapped awake the next morning in his new bed, all trussed up. But he's sure something of the night must have stayed in that red head, because sometimes Al looked at him from the corner of his eyes. Testing him, maybe seeing if Angel wanted something from him, or was going to use it against him.

Sure, the sinner was a bit of a muck up, and he'd killed for fun, but like... no one important. Not friends, not family, not... whatever these weirdoes in the hotel had come to be to him. But he couldn't breach the gap to tell Al he was safe with Angel, because that'd be saying th quiet bit out loud... and he's not sure he'd get the same answer back.

But... he'd noticed he was able to just exist 'round Al, even with his dirty jokes, more often now. There was a slight ease of tension. Same as the one he had with Vaggie, really... you didn't say anything out loud, but you both knew there was an easiness there. A safety.

She hadn't even thrown that plate hard enough to decapitate earluer, and if that didn't say sisterly love, what could it stand for?

The sound of staticky uh, french-like words spluttering over the music in little hissing bursts catches Angel's attention. He snaps back into the moment.

Alastor looked furious and indignant about the whole cosmic flex of Lucifer's restocking. Of course the little king had interfered. It wasn't done kindly, it was another reminder that he could do anything he wanted and it was so Easy... with one thought he invalidated another way that Alastor was helpful to the hotel. His spy networks, the deals he had with smugglers... no longer necessary.

All so his majesty could try and show his daughter how useless even the most powerful sinners were in relation to the Morningstar family. Missing her point entirely... again.

Just because one Could doesn't mean one Should or even Must.

Angel, as one who had been around Hell for a while and could see what was yanking Al's chain about this mess, points out that it actually didn't curry favour with Charlie. Not like Short King intended after all.

Heck, he even points out it aint that bad if you reaaaaally thought about it... cause hey, saved money and time in the end, right?

Seeing a need to distract, he fluffed up his chest fur, draped himself over the countertop and cooed. Alastor's ears went right up in alert, and Angel would've bet Fat Nuggets that that floofy tail was doing the same in some ancient panic instinct.

Putting it on thick, to dispel the tension, Angel grins lazily at Al. Pointing out that, hey... maybe you could get them sexy smugglers to bring the starlet back some of those new Toys he'd heard about, cause word on the street was that there was this new kinda Stroker that-...

Al looked like he was about to have a stroke... but the ears settled. This was familiar nonsense.

Angel laughed, not unkindly, and stretched upright again. Messing with Al and Vags was sort of fun, like a hobby you dusted off when things got a bit Meh. It was also fun to get the Radio Demon on the ropes, given how much the guy liked to shitstir all on his own.

Alastor, for his part, then caught Angel completely off guard by asking if all 6 of his arms were broken - because why would he need something like that otherwise? The scrunched expression actually showed the overlord was trying to rationalise the request. Fuck, that was hilarious...

The whole bizarre nature of the conversation actually made Angel tear up in disbelieving mirth, holding his sides.

"How the fuck do you know what that is?" He'd wheezed, trying to imagine Al flicking casually through one of the Lust catalogues like he would a newspaper on Sunday. The mental image blurred and warped like Al on a camera screen, it was too hard to picture.

"We're from the same time period my good man, and Hell's advertising campaigns are as persistent as they are pervasive." Al points out the kitchen window at a number of visible billboards that displayed products one would not anticipate being so openly advertised anywhere else.

Nothing subtle about the new DragonDrillDo XXXL-treme from VoxTek! The billboard ran the breadth of three adjacent buildings and the product looked like it could probably could kill a Sin if used incorrectly.

"Oh. Well, a stroker is like... you know how sometimes you just have had a long day, and you don't wanna have to do everything yourself, right? Gotta get that dopamine flowing somehow, and store bought is fine in this house. No shade." He flutters his eyelashes and watches the deer sigh in silent resignation that he would weather whatever came out of Angel's mouth right now.

"Why don't we get one for the table, you know... to share if you like, and I'll help ya try it out..." the eyebrow waggle was excessive, but it sure was fun.

He hadn't anticipated the slice of tomato that slaps him dead on the forehead. Laughing harder as it slips down his face slowly, as if in on the bit.

"One could point out the merits of putting in a hard day's work, and using a little elbow grease as it were. The things you do by hand provide greater satisfaction, over the artificial...or so I have always come to understand." Al deadpans back, grinning at the suddenly shocked expression on Angel's face. "Come now, little spider, you don't truly believe that I'm blind to that side of life, hmm?"

"Smiles, watch what you say... with the visuals my brain is producing, asking me to come anywhere might just be a dangerous game." Angel quips back, putting certain mental images aside for later perusal. The guy was hot in the weird scary way of the overlords... so sue him.

He, predictably, gets another tomato slice to the face. Charlie was gonna scold them for wasting food in a hot minute. Ah well, Angel's just grateful it wasn't the capsicum, that coulda stung for days, had the overlord had them to hand.

Still, the fact he wasn't being mauled by poppets means that he musta wormed his way into Al's Good Graces. Same as husk and Niff and Charlie... and maybe Vags, he's not sure where those two fall now. Less attempted stabbing with that little angelic toothpick, at least... so maybe they're doing okay too.

"If you are quite done being ridiculous," Alastor makes quite the show of rolling his eyes and blasting an audience groaning at him. "Do be a, hah, a deer, and grab out the following..."

Angel may have four hands on heh, hand, most of the time but the list of spices was getting excessive at this point. They can't all go in the same dish, right? It'd be too much for one tongue to process and just come out feeling like you licked a powerpoint or something.

Angel's smart mouth moves as if to say something of the sort to the guy who could technically turn him inside out and not in the fun way, but won't 'cause they're not-buddies now... when something shifts. It's almost like the little glass thing wiggles out of the way of his grasping fingers and then hurls itself downward.

The cap unscrews itself as it falls, in a way that seemed too easy for something new, something allegedly just off the shelf of some earth store or whatever. His eight eyes flare wide with realisation at the What, but there's nothing he can do, no way to react fast enough to move as the contents begin to spray outward. A torrent that shouldn't be possible.

Angel feels someone grab one of his lower shoulders and yank him back, with a speed and ferocity that should have tossed him across the room, but even with that action he can sense it's far too late.

Scalding pain sears up his right upper arm and shoulder, fragmenting across face, neck and a splotch on her lower right arm. It's blinding. He's been hurt real fucking bad before, and each time felt different... this... this was like flashes of lighning behind the eyes.

Fuck, he hadn't felt anything like this since they stopped doing electronecro shoots. Fucking hated the few moths Val'd been into that... or maybe it eas Travis. Both needed to choke to death for that mess, if the world was fair, that is.

Angel can't comprehend anything but the twanging of nerves as his trajectory and the full force of his lanky telephone pole of a body is yanked straight into a writhing mass of darkness. The inky mass of shadows hissing frantically as granules continue to spill down, shielding as best they can despite ther own discomfort.

Dimly, Angel wonders if they feel pain... if Al can feel their pain, or what they touch. It's a weird thought...

Heh, best not share that with Val or he'd find a way to fuck that shadow, and Al'd burn down the whole of Pride. Oh, hang on, loopy thoughts, nope, can't do shock. that's bullshit. Get it together Angel.

The shadows brush over his limbs, dislodging what they could of the corrosive substance, trying to help where they could. Despite the obvious discomfort it caused everyone involved.

Angel is half braced on a nearby bench, trembling, because fuck that hurts, One of his arms is being gripped to near bruising strength, and the other is grasping Alastor's should right back.

Despite attempts to stifle it, Angel could feel his mouth part in a harsh, agonised cry as several of the utensils and bowls they were using crashed to the floor at the sudden displacement of bodies.

The container clanged to the floor innocently, rolling away and spewing out more than a dozen jars that size should have been able to produce. Perhaps an enchantment? Wouldn't be the first bottomless thing conjured; saved on shopping bills if things just refilled when empty or expired.

His shout must have alerted others because Vaggie was suddenly there, spear brandished wildly, as Husk stormed in behind her. The pair look ready to skewer Alastor if he was secretly attempting to murder and cook Angel.

To be fair... that was certainly one assumption. Angel could suggest a few other reasons for callig out that might get him actually, honest-to-satan, turned into shish kabobs by Al. He lets out a shaky laugh as his thoughts go a bit silly again.

He just holds off on slapping himself across the face, trying to stay calm. He'd had worse, much, much, MUCH worse... and this was what set off the hysterics? Fuck off with that!

Although, based on the way Husk's stern expression blanched just as sharply as Vaggie's, perhaps he wasn't being a big old baby about this. Maybe it really was Bad.

"Shit." Vaggie hisses, eye wide, and spear donking onto the floor. "What the fuck happened in here?"

Angel pushes himself upright as the shadows recede, breathing deliberately. That cute little in-out thing Charlie did in yoga the other day, something about breathing into boxes wasn't it? He wants to make a dumb box-based joke, but the energy is going into not-screaming as he moves his torso.

Angel can feel himself calming slightly, against the residual stinging pain in his cheek. Fuck, must've gotten some there. It's about a 5 out of 10, compared to the rest... until he tries to smile and reassure the others. Then it hits a full-on 7.5.

His eyes water, fuck, yeah he's not gone soft. That actually really goddamn hurts. It's exactly like that time Angel accidentally spilled acid on himself disposing of a rat uptop, the scars were still healing on his arm when he died. What a weird damn thing to recall.

Soemthing moved beside him, stiffer than usual but nonetheless commanding attention. "Husker, Vagatha... do NOT let Niffty in here. She'll harm herself attempting to clear the mess, and likely try to roll in it to chase the burning pain. You know her proclivities by now." The tone is that odd twist of jovial and authoratative, but the normal playful teasing lilt to it has a note of strain there.

Angel feel his world do a dark somersault as Alastor tugs him through the shadows and across the room to the entrance. Far away from the salt littering the surfaces about the cupboard, not to mention the floor. It seemed to still be trickling out of the container... what the actual fuck.

Vaggie ducked out the door and yelled for Charlie, citing urgency and that they needed medical help. Angel starts to think that perhaps that was, you know, overkill... but he's suddenly aware of how hard he's leaning on support when Husk pulls him off of Alastor and braces him with his own paws.

Those golden eyes are roving over the sinner, and Angel can't find the energy for a sexy little pout and some coquettish quip. Whiskers clearly ain't into what he sees. That expression could glower its way through steel doors if he wanted it to.

"Well, fuck... what kind of idiot puts actual, honest-to-goddamn-earth salt in the kitchen?" Husk mumbles herding Angel immediately towards the far counter, eyes assessing. "Gotta wash this off quick - you might have some clinging to your skin. Is the sink clear?"

The words ring in the air, echoing against the clashing sounds of their footsteps and the pounding of Angel's heart in his ears. It's about that point he catches up with the realisation that there's no music playing.

He glances back at the visibly seething Overlord, who was trying not to appear to be propping himself up against the nearby open door, and failing somewhat. Angel could see that the damn salt had clearly caught Al across the shoulder, upper back, neck and patches to one side of his face. One of the silly red ears was rather less fluffy, appearing quite agitated as it twitched.

Well, fuck. If Al caught a glancing blow whilst dragging Angel out of the spray, then how bad was the starlet? He felt barbecued.

Hah, technically he'd been pre-prepped and marinated in something. Maybe Al and his friend Rosie could take a nibble! Husk shook him, gently, but enough to click his brain back into the here and now. The hysteria quashed back down for the moment, he'd give his third pair of arms for that mess to stop.

"Hey, listen this is going to suck but it's necessary to get it off you. So just stay with me, alright?" Husk murmurs, wetting a teatowel and sarting to sluice the areas. He might have sworn rather viciously at the first touch of water... but by the time the second lot poured over the area, it started to feel soothing.

"Well this has been quite the little frustration. All our preparations have been tainted by something that would try to ea the stomach of those who ingested it." Alastor snarls as Vaggie approaches, slowly, as if she was trying to tempt an injured feral cat into accepting help.

His eyes snapped to her, and without the shadows, it was clear the extent of the damage. Angel hadn't realised Salt could eat through clothing until now, probably for the best he'd done such a damn good job on those stitches, the top edges of the wound are almost invisible under the regrown deer fur.

Angel can feel his own shirt just as ratty, and mourns the loss of it. He'd liked how it made his chest perk just right... and getting a shirt that could switch from four to six arms was a bitch and a half in this town. The enchantments alone cost him a lot in terms of repaying Val in weird, off the wall kink stuff the moth was into and Angel wasn't.

Briefly, Angel considered the fact he'd thought seeing Al dishevelled like this would make him look kinda hot, maybe a bit naughty. But it was kinda distressing, and freaky. Not unlike the night they found him collapsed, really. Overlords are meant to be untouchable gods compared to Sinners on the street, seeing them fucked up and hurt was... actually frightening in a weird way.

At least you could say that the mussy look made Al's perpetual grin all the more manic. You could feel that the wrong move might end in someone getting bitten. The radio dial eyes, though, suggested that perhaps Al had an idea who did this... and they were going to PAY.

It was also kind of a mess in his head now, not just his own injury. But Alastor actually interceding. He didn't have to, he'd been out of the 'splash zone' as it were... why the fuck had he risked harm by coming to get Angel?

Was this ike how sometimes Al would appear and take on Sinners targeting hotel staff? Or that time he literally took a bullet for Husk, and laughed about it, only to make the offender eat his own weapon until his teeth broke on the barrel and the fucker was a mess of snotty tears? Niffty'd turned the dislodged molars into a necklace and gifted it to Charlie... who had worn it for a full day and then put it 'somewhere safe'.

Hah, get wrecked you stubborn deer, you LIKE me! Angel suppresses his gleeful little giggle, knowing it'd hurt to let it out right now. The flicker of smug grin Husk shot him seemed to indicate he agreed. Or at least, that's what Angel was interpreting that as.

Still, guilt did churn in his guts cause, yeah, he could take a beating and all but it never felt right to have others get hurt for him. Anytime Cherri caught a blow in a fight to prevent him taking it, it weighed on him. This... this was just as messed up, but in a different way.

Alastor was shorter than Angel, not by much, but enough that it was inevitable that the salt showering on the spider was going to trickle down to those below even as they pulled him from the metaphorical line of fire.

Something down Angel's chest was burning, but at this point, he straight up wasn't ready to look down and acknowledge the full extent of this horror. Inside his chest, his heart was alternating between thundering at Husk's tender care and proximity... and aching for accidentally getting someone else hurt, for his sake.

He's just some washed up, rent-a-hole whore, why would anyone-... his fists clenched. No, no we're going to be kind to ourself. Even if it feels all woo-woo and new agey bullshit, but Charlie thinks there's worth in me. Husk looks at me like I hung the moon. Alastor put himself in harm's way to help me. They must think I'm worth something beyond my body, beyond sex.

And one day I'm gonna feel confident about that too. Not yet, but I'm gonna get there. Angel reassured himself.

"It's okay..." Husk murmurs, the mantra repeated soothingly over and over, until the tension in his arms released. "There you go... don't let the thoughts win. Hard to fight your own brain, but you can. I've won, and you will too."

Well, fuck, he can't not fantasise about riding Husk off into the sunset now can he? Not when Whiskers was being so kind, so understanding, so-... smug, actually. But following the flicking tail with his eyes helped to settle the weirder thoughts the spider was experiencing.

The calm immediately broken when the cavalry arrived.

Charlie blasts open the doors with the largest first aid kit known to sinner-kind. Three Nifftys could sleep in it with room to spare for the entire bug collection... where the fuck did the Princess get this thine?

Ah, Angel idly notes the Sloth symbol. Well, of course it was from Bellphagore, the Sin was prodigious for naptime and medical care.

"Nobody panic! I have literally everything we could ever need to manage a situation right here! How bad is it? Is anybody dead?" She rapid-fires across the room, eyes darting in all directions to assess the situation.

"It's fine, nothing that won't heal in a day or so, charlotte do calm down!" Alastor grins, doing his mildly condescending little hand wave, straightening back to his cheerful persona as if he wasn't half-charred.

Husk actually walks across the room and smacks his overlord over the back of the head with a wing. "Just cut the shit, Al, we both know that hurts like a bitch... and I'm like 85% sure being honest about that for once won't kill you. Probably. Ain't like anyone here will take advantage of you like this, they like you... lord knows someone has to."

That startles a laugh out of the deer. "Oh Husker, you are a delight..."

"More importantly," Husk interjects. Starting to tug the only mildly-resisting Alastor towards the sink as well. It's a miracle no one has been bitten yet. "How did this even happen? The only salt we got in the hotel is from Envy, normally... and you can't just accidentally get the earth stuff, right?"

Lucifer pops in in a swirling array of red-gold sparkles. "There you are sweetie, what's the hullaballoo that's got you yelling all over the hotel?"

Charlie, already pulling out more gauze and cream than anyone would need in a lifetime, gestures at Angel and Alastor. Husk returns to his task of gently wiping over Angel's angry-looking shoulder with a moistened towel; it takes effort for the spider not to flinch.

"Ooh yikes. Hmmm, looks like you got a little clumsy in the kitchen there, bambi." Lucifer grins, eyes sparkling with malicious delight. His expression doesn't waver as it takes in Angel. "And you managed to damage a guest in the process, how can you call yourself a bellhop? For shame."

The antlers creak ominously, extending upwards and pulling at the angry skin there as Alastor clearly chooses to ignore the limitations in the face of the small all-powerful asshole before him.

The process pauses, in shock, as Husk tests the bounds of Al's famously finite patience by clipping him again with a wing. Angel is going to have a heart attack if Whiskers doesn't cut that out right the fuck now. Al seems to surprised to be angry, at least.

What the porn start wasn't expecting, was to have the too-bright grin turned upon him as Alastor asked. "Angel... the device you mentioned earlier, would it come in such a width that one could cram the entirety of his Lowness into the orifice, since he wants to act like a pompous little dic-...?!"

"Whoakay, no need for that. I'm sure it was an accident..." Charlie interjects, hands up like someone trying to settle a furious horse that was ready and willing to cave someone's ribcage in.

Lucifer winked at Alastor and turned to face his daughter, "Of course it was, sweetie, I'd never hurt your guests deliberately!"

That omission caught even Charlie"s attention. "...dad? I just want to clarify... not accusing you or anything, but did you... know that you summoned earth salt when you restocked the pantry?"

"Of course not Char Char." Said the prince of lies, whose smile was violently gleeful under that insipid hat.

Charlie's expression closed off completely, pinched taut, as she saw Angel breathe his way through the gentle sluicing of water over too raw skin. Her mind was racing as rapidly as her pulse. Worst case scenarios whirling through her mind.

Would Valentino punish Angel for this? For being hurt and likely delaying filming? Probably. Fuck. She hated this.

Charlie takes a deep breath, and forces a smile onto her face. She can do this. "Dad. It starts with Sorry? Remember?"

"Of course, Char-Char! Ahem, Angle Rust, im sorry you were injured by accident." Lucifer chirped, looking slightly to the left of the sinner and not really caring for anything but Charlie's approval in this situation. He thinks he nailed the faux concern too, the pompous little cockrel.

Thankfully, his daughter is not the naive child he recalls. The King of Hell's eyes go wide eough to fall out of their sockets as his own beloved daughter hurls a half chopped cabbbage at his head. The leaves exploding about like confetti, leaving him bewildered and blinking sharply. "What?"

"That. Was NOT. An. Apology. Dad." Charlie growls, horns out and tail lashing. "We don't try to hurt others here, and I get you have an issue with Al for some reason... but this is ridiculous! You of all people know that earth salt can permanently harm sinners, so why would you do this?! I'm not as stupid as you think dad, it's clear you were hoping to get Alastor with this, because he's our main cook. And look what you did! Angel's hurt too, do you have any idea what his overlord might do to him because he's not 'camera ready'?"

Angel actually froze as icy dread clawed its way up his spine hand over hand. With everything happening, Angel really hadn't thought that far ahead, and now someone spoke the reality aloud he found himself visibky fighting back tears.

Val would make him pay for damaging company property...

Fuck, he'd be lucky if they let him leave the studio again.

"Worry not Angel," Comes an unexpectedly calm voice. "I will clear my schedule for the evening and deal with the moth. He's been on the to do list for a while..." Alastor reassured, admittedly uncertain why he was being so altruistic. He'd told himself to stop caring after the whole Adam fiasco. Damn it all.

"You... will? Why, I ain't got nothing to offer you..." Angel looked confused. That mask slipped over his face as he grinned salaciously, "unless ya changed your mind about that offer i made to suck ya-..."

It was his turn to get smacked with a wing.

"Behave."

"Anything for you, Whiskers..."

"Drop the act, its creepy." Husk groaned, wringing the teatowel out over something on Angel's side. The avian feline hissed in sympathy as Angel flinched back from the sensation, then cringed at the way the rest of his skin went taut. "Stay still if you can, I know it hurts, but you're doing great..."

"Indeed Angel, creepy is my shtick... do find your own." Al drawls, taking a subtle step away from the now-advancing Charlie, who had her demonic aspects out and more duckie shaped bandaids than anyone should have a right to have access to. "Please keep those away from me."

"Only if you let me flush the injury with at least some water to make sure we get it all off of you." Charlie negotiates, putting down the bandaids in a manner that suggested they could be snatched up again in a split second. And for a moment, Alastor feels pride at her clear if clumsy attempt at manipulation. She appears to have learned deceptive kindness, will demonic wonders never cease?

Lucifer is scowling. "Stop being such a drama queen. Here, I'll fix your little boo boos, even though its pointless because this is hell and you'll be hurt doing something violent or self destructive in the next four hours anyway, if you stop complaining about it. You got pranked, deal with it bambi."

Alastor bared his teeth sharply at the king's outstretched hand as the monarch advanced. Angel could see something trembling sharply under the coat from the corner of his eyes and guessed the deer instincts were not taking this threat all that well. "For someone who sees himself as above the so-called barbaric, cruel and hopeless sinners, sire, you certainly dont hesitate to utilise similar actions to harm out of petty jealousy."

The King pauses, scoffing arrogantly. "Jealousy? Of what, you? The freak manipulating my own daughter with this stupid sweet-cannibal overlord act? Fuck you. Because let's be real here... overlord or no, if i really wanted to I could just smite you and be done with it. Why can't you take a joke, Annette?"

Alastor learns towards the King. "Then do it, little majesty, smite away. Because I'm certain that a little spot of casual murder will repair the fracture between you and Charlotte fantastically and not just remind her how little you care for the sinners she's trying desperately to save."

He pauses, and if he physically could, Alastor would be scowling. "And for further clarification, you feathered fool - a prank is only worthwhile if the victims find it funny in the aftermath. Although given how isolated you've been, one can only imagine how little of the social graces or cues have remained. Is it any wonder everyone you ever loved has abandoned you?"

Lucifer was growing brighter with every word, horns out, tail lashing. Ah, there's the family resemblance.

There's a general group inhalation, and Angel sucks it through his teeth, his nerves flicked into flight or fight mode as the Devil himself seethes. You can feel his power like the pulses of sound at a concert, it moved through you and you know it could crush your bones with the right frequency.

"Sinner scum, you think you can show such disrespect to me and get away with it?" Lucifer's breathing hellfire on every word, very biblical and not at all overly-theatrical. How fascinating. "Let's see how smug you are when I strip your flesh from your bones!"

"Hah, you wouldn't even be the first to try it, you duck-obsessed dictator. Do attempt some originality, majesty, or did the creative flair disintegrate when you landed in Hell?" Alastor tosses back, appearing unconcerned about the fact that at least Vaggie and Charlotte are making definitive 'cut it out' gestures at him.

Shadows shoved Charlie, Vaggie, Husk and Angel out of the way as a blast of something bright hurtled through the kitchen towards Alastor; decimating retinas left and right.

Angel briefly wonders if Val would be open to having the scripts done in braille so he knows when to moan and when to say something dirty... because it didn't feel like he'd ever see again. Fuck, the sink seemed to be gone, as well as the walls behind it.

Charlie screamed in a horrified fury, leaping for her father, who was grinning as he panted in rage. "Not so smug now, are you, bambi?"

The grin dropped in pure shock as a rather disappointed-looking Alastor appeared from the dimming decimated area, appearing fundamentally unchanged... except for the collar flaring brightly, tight against his throat.

"Ah, blast. I'd hoped that would do the trick... do you want to try again, little majesty? I'm sure you have a number of insecurities I could prod at if you need motivation...?" Alastor asked, seizing at the lilac chain with obvious disgust behind that smile.

"You... what? How are you alive? Is that my-...?" Lucifer stammered, thrown off-guard. He could have vaporised Adam with that blast, why the fuck was the BELLHOP alive?

He receives a withering glare. "Do catch up. Yes, it is. No, I can't say where she is, though one might look upward for answers."

Charlie covers her mouth, breathing in for four and out for four. She can stay calm. Her dad tried to kill her not dad mentor overlord friend hotelier over some jibes, after he tried to pull a prank that could have severely injured him but backfired and got two members of her hotel instead. And something her missing mother did saved Al from the smiting, but he... was upset he didn't what? Die? Was this the time for crisis counselling? Was this a cry for help? What did the mental health first aid guide recommend? This was NOT in the curriculum!

Vaggie was there, immediately, her gentle hands holding her close and encouraging her to breathe. This was all so insane.

" If you are quite finished your tantrum, Little Majesty, would you heal Angel Dust already and show some contriteness for how your actions caused this harm?" Alastor snipes, redirecting attention to the other sinner. "He's quite injured, and I dislike knowing you have brought harm to a friendly party whilst attempting to torment myself. There will be a way to make you pay, little king, and I intend for you to worry about when and what form that will take."

Lucifer, possibly in shock, shuffled over to the starlet with a slightly vacant expression; reaching out mechanically to grab a wrist. He pulses gold light up the spider's arm, wrapping it around the injuries and soothing the harm without any visible effort.

By the time the light fades, even the hair has regrown to its normal pattern and consistency over the previously burned patches. Good as new. That was insane.

Husk has to physically catch Angel as his knees go weak from the sudden rush of endorphins as the pain stopped completely. They stumble a step before Angel can get his shit together in the wake of such an unexpected headrush.

Lucifer rounds on Alastor. "Now you're gonna tell me what the fuck that's about!" He gestures at the collar, " And why seemingly everyone else in Hell can land a blow on your frail crimson ass... but me trying to actively Smite you is waved off? Do you understand how physically impossible that actively is?"

Alastor lets his neck crack sickeningly to the side. "Hah, that's quite simple. She made it clear that I would not be allowed to let you stop me in any way, shape or form and wove it into the contract. Especially not die, unless it was in service to her daughter's hotel or ideals. Everything about you and your abilities is made to bend around that of your dear wife and her abilities; she bet the farm on being able to ensure against you causing harm to someone under her banner. You have no power here, little morningstar, and you most certainly aren't supposed to Be here. That has been made abundantly clear."

Lucifer found himself flinching back. He could hear the echoes of Lillith in those words, in her darker moments, when she'd lost composure against the only being in all of hell who could withstand her powerful fury.

Charlie looked stricken. "Al, what dad did wasn't right, and I'm not devaluing your experiences, but... everyone is welcome at the hotel. You can't say that to him."

Lucifer is looking at him pointedly, eyes narrowed and stomach roiling in horror as he deciphered this mess. "I don't... think that's what he meant, Char-Char. I think... your mother doesn't want me here, around you, and that's... upsetting her. Which used to be why palace staff got replaced so frequently... but I don't think you ever noticed, duckling."

"Why would she try to keep us apart?" Charlie frowned, her memories of time with her mother were so cheerful, interspersed with some odd moments of formailty and a bleakness. But who wasn't an angsty teen at some point?

Lucifer can't help the hysterical little laugh that escapes. "Charlie, she's done nothing but for your entire life. Why stop now?"

His jaw clicks shut as if horrified to have been so blunt.

"As disgusting as the words are in my mouth, I'm afraid I must agree with your father, Charlotte." Alastor grimaces somehow, the smile was there but he looked like he'd gotten a mouthful of poison with no way to spit it out. "You were to be kept separate, and away from... toxic idealism i believe is the wording used. Though I would argue you've already received a fatal dose lready, based on the hotel alone."

A laugh track plays, it feels perfunctory. Expected.

"Did she... make you come here?" Charlie asks bracing herself. It was pretty obvious, but given her mind was whirling form the last half hour, she feels she's doing pretty well actually!

"Yes, and no. Not at first, at least. Initially she just wanted someone to keep an eye on you, especially during your initial forays out into Pride. Your... enthusiasm often outweighed your common sense, before you found Vagatha, who then took on the role of guarding you." Alastor made a dramatic wink at the ex-orcist, who flushed slightly gold under the scrutiny.

"It was later, after that rousing disaster of a television program, when I approached you directly at the hotel that she decided to add stipulations about this project. Though her... request... to keep the royal house divided has been a source of contention as of late, especially with the recent meetings with Heaven and battle."

"So you're... sort of here on your own free will?" Charlie clung to hope that this answer would silence the crushing guilt in her stomach.

"You could say so. I wasn't forced to come to the hotel, that was out of interest and convenience, but once here it was identified that... she would prefer I stay. Which has been most frustrating." Alastor's right ear flattened, the left was damaged and twitched in place.

That prompted Angel to step in. "Okay, can we do story time when Al's not covered in salt-related injuries? I can tell you it sucks harder than Tina Titfucker in Tornad-hoes at Large 4: Return of the Gobbler, and she's a vacuum cleaner of a sinner when she gets going."

Vaggie looks revolted at the segue, but Husk is grinning.

Lucifer stiffens. "...I did say I'd fix it, didn't I, bambi? Can't have you swooning like a damsel in the middle of a big plot reveal... this isn't a hellanovella."

Alastor steps out of range of the hand, and is immediately bracketed by Angel and Husk. "I am willing to eat my way out of this, so anyone who wants to keep their hands on their bodies has until the count of 1." he snarls at them.

"Nah, I think you're going to chill out and trust us..." Angel teases, poking out his tongue and tightening his grip.

"If you think the whole... other night situation is going to save you frm my wrath, I assure you, the debt has been repaid already with this little mess. Do not test me." the Overlord snipes, going deathly still as the radio dials flashed. But intriguingly the sinners don't seem to be phased.

Angel seems intrigued. "Wait, you remember that? How'd you know I was there too?"

"Well, my good man, I know two tall pink-adjacent sinners and you, sir, were not in Rosie's signature attire." Alastor deadpans, as Husk clearly attained a ery specific visual and bit his lip to stifle the laughter. "I do appreciate the assistance, but had assumed it was implied that the reciprocal debt was up to me to figure out how to fulfil..."

"Er, no... sometimes you just help people ya care about, so they don't die. That's what people do. Would you have hesitated if it was like Rosie, or Charlie?" Angel asks, wondering who fucked up this guy's sense of trust... but then recalled where they lived and decided the answer was 'probably everyone'.

"That's... different."

"Did you three fuck? What's this coded thing happening here?" Vaggie interjects, looking to be on the verge of pulling her hair out.

Husk's hat falls off as he bursts into deep gales of laughter at the very idea. Angel pouts, "Aw Whiskers, it'd be real hot if we did... are you laughing at little old me...?"

Alastor appeared to be considering the implications of their statements and the current positioning of everyone. It was a plausible question.

He sighs, tensing slightly as Lucifer stepped closer. "No, rest assured I did not breach any of the fraternisation rules of the hotel. These two were foolish enough not to take the opportunity for a raise in status and power, when they discovered I was injured after the little fight with Heaven. Husker maintained he was the only one who was present, but I recall more than they suspect."

Angel gasped. "Fuck, you weren't awake for the stitches were you? I shoulda given you something."

"Rest assured, it wouldn't have been the worst thing that's happened to me, but no... that bit is not part of my recollections." Alastor assured, wondering why he felt the need to. He should have pressed on that guilt like a bruise, delighted in the agony and regret Angel exuded. But he was tired, and in pain and the... stars or something were incorrectly aligned for such schadenfreude. Something along those lines.

The spider and the cat seemed to relax a fraction.

"Good, cause I'd've felt like an asshole otherwise. That took ages to fix... you shoulda said something earlier, asshole." Angel mumbles, tightening his hold as Lucifer made contact. "No, keep all tentacles to yourself, Al... and teeth! Fuck, I need that arm, bad overlord! I'm not above smacking you with a rolled up newspaper if you snap at me again!"

"You wouldn't dare..." Alastor gasped, shocked.

"He would, and I'd find the sunday edition, so it had extra heft." Husk confirmed, the traitor.

Skin healed over, fur regrew, and the persistent sting seemed to fade. Lucifer paused, and then tugged the thinnest thread of somthing from Alastor's chest, causing the sinner writhe at the sensation. It was fine as a hair, tangling in on itself and disappearing into the aether at a casual flick of the devil's wrist.

"Got rid of the divine grace holding that little scratch open on you. You're welcome. Now, tell me more about this deal with my wife." Lucifer says, tugging his hand back as Alastor sagged, breathing heavily.

Husk turned and flared his wings, creating a bit of a privacy screen as he checked in with the Overlord. "You still alive?"

"Indeed. It's been... some time since there was a lack of pain in my everyday that it quite caught me off-guard." Alastor mumbled back, and wasn't that fucking sad to hear?

"You wanna talk to short king though? I can give him the old Sinder wink and take him somewhere to forget his wife for a bit, if you get me, and you can escape." Angel suggests, winking outrageously.

Alastor rolls his eyes. "I can't ask anyone to take on that level of vile task for my sake..."

There's an offended "HEY! I'm a CATCH you fucking period stain! Anyone would be delighted to sleep with m-... oh, sorry honey, I forgot you were there." from the other side of Husk's wing curtain.

Alastor straightened and used a flash of magic to repair his attire, and that of Angel, removing the muss of moments before. He nods to Husk, who drops his wings.

"What do you want to know?"

"The exact terms of the deal, as best you can provide it, because I'm sensing a silence order in the binding." Lucifer says, not quite a command, but bordering on it. Alastor glares at the mini monarch, but Charlotte looks on the verge of tears, so he relents.

"She has requested someone watch out for and protect Charlotte, and ensure her safety, no matter the cost. As I mentioned before there were caveats about that, and the hotel, but overall Charlotte is the centre of the matter. This includes managing any threats to the hotel, and not inciting any major overlord based drama, as she liked to term it. It's the main reason I haven't ripped Vox's head off and shoved it up the moth's backside like a matroyshka doll." Alastor's expression went sinister, and it definitely felt like there was backstory there that no one wanted to touch right now.

"Uh-huh... and what else?"

"Keep you away. Isolate Charlotte from your influence if possible. Keep her in a position where she can be seen as a harmless figurehead that Heaven will never feel the need to deal with or remove. thus the encouragement in this redemption farce." Alastor says, waving a hand and trying to ignore how Charlotte's fallen expression panged at the heart he definitely didn't have.

"But... it could work!" Charlie says, her passion and desperation driing her to tearfulness.

"Exactly. It COULD work, and she is afraid for you if it should."

"...what?" Charlie jerks back, blinking owlishly.

"There is... precedent, for a sinner being redeemed. I can't tell you about that, because she has bound it... but she didn't say that I couldn't mention it has happened before just the details."

"He's lying Charlie, don't get your hopes up." Lucifer warns, movng towards his daughter as her expression wars between hope and confusion. "She could have told him to say that..."

"I can also tell you, that redemption confuses Heaven, and she was told to deal with it last time it happened. Which is why she..." the next words cut off as the chain flared. The silencing charm in effect.

"Hmmm, you know, I don't recall if I was banned from explaining how the redemption allegedly happened... I understand they were out in an extermination with at least one person they didn't want to see die, and foolishly decided to stand between them and angel blades. I still don't understand how that resulted in redemption, because realistically thousands of sinners have tried to protect others from Exorcists over the years of slaughter... why this particular one?"

Charlie's eyes went wide. "That's... a really big clue, thanks Al! Ohhhh we need to look into this, it has to be about the intent! Or maybe the connection?"

"Please breathe, baby..." Vaggie murmurs, gently.

"Anything else?" Lucifer asked, frowning at Alastor. He didn't like this situation. It felt too convenient.

"She made it clear I was not to directly raise arms against or antagonise Heaven, particularly her first husband. To ensure this, she put a rather frustrating bind on my powers, I have some access... but not all." Alastor seemed to be aiming for nonchalant, but was clearly uncomfortable with having shared such a vulnerability, possibly wondering why he had done so.

Charlie looked like she wanted to grab his hands and say something heartfelt. Lucifer looked a tad too smug... and Vaggie's expression was torn between realisation and a base-born desire to throttle him. That, he could work with.

"Are you telling me, you old-timey idiota, that you faced the first man without any angelic steel and at half your power? What were you THINKING?!" she explodes, yanking at her hair.

"It was a conflict of orders, protect Charlotte and the Hotel but don't raise arms. It was the best caveat I could find... and honestly he was such a sloppy little thing, if it had't been for the guitar axe nonsense damaging my staff, it wouldn't have taken much more to kill him."

"But you-... ugh..." there was a string of words Husk looked like he agreed with but refused to translate. "Not the point! You should have said something! We could have had you put up the shield from somewhere less vulnerable to attack... had someone near you WITH the steel so you didn't have to pick it up. It's called trust, you idiot, try it sometime!"

Alastor's ears were flat back on his skull, eyes wide. He seemed taken aback she'd care at all.

"Welcome to being cared about, Al, you'll never know peace or privacy again... but the people make it worth it." Angel says, slinging an arm over the Overlord's shoulders. "I do have one question though... how can you be, y'know, in a soul deal, and still keep your souls?"

"Ah, that's simple, negotiation. Technically, there are still a number of souls under Husker, who is under myself. It's about how you word the contract."

"Oh... okay, that checks. So... how'd you meet her majesty?"

"Well, after a number of midnight rendevo-.. I'm kidding your majesty. We had an unexpected meeting under unusual circumstances, and a deal was the only way to prevent being trapped somewhere annoying. That's all I am willing to say on the matter."

Lucifer's red eyes seemed to See something before he nodded to himself. "I can see the truth of what you're hiding, sinner. Are you in danger from my wife? Does she... punish disobedience like she used to with the hellborne staff?"

"...perhaps, but it is harder to reach across realms. So for the most part it is additional limitations or draining power from afar. Annoyances, at best, but at least my skin stays on."

"Listen, I don't like you... but Charlie does, and I know what she's going to ask me. I could do it... but I need to know why you and Charlie have a chain between you. I can see it plain as day." Lucifer asks, voice glacial.

"It's not-..." Charlie starts.

"It's for a Favour, so do unclench. She wanted Charlotte on a soulchain to control her indirectly, but... well, that didn't quite fit the definition of Protection, from my perspective. Unfortunate, that. But a Favour allowed someone to share information about angelic steel to another party without repercussions, so it was necessary."

"...if I find out you're lying, and I do this, I will be actively able to smite you. You know that, right?" Lucifer says, again, not a threat... just... stating a fact.

"Well, given I was willing to allow it earlier for the off chance it might break the deal or kill me, I would say go right ahead, Sire." Alastor shrugged, "But if you want a deal..."

"Nope. Now, bend over," everyone ignored Angel's gale of laughter, "so I can reach the stupid thing and shut your eyes. I mean everyone, of course."

The King does... something. A light almost brighter than the attempted smiting, smote-ening, smything? Who knows, burns through the room and the whole place vibrates as a metallic snap is heard.

Shadows zoom up the walls and across the floors, the room fills with symbols and radios crackle to full volume momentarily. It settles quickly. "Apologies, that was a lot of power rushing back at once, it was allow it to manifest, or explode."

"....I suppose I owe you thanks, your majesty." Alastor said, saying without saying the implicit thanks. "Now, if you'll excuse us, I believe that there's a rather pesky insect requiring extermination. Come along Husker, Angel... let's take the Void!"

Husk groans, but it's swallowed up by the sudden wave of shadows.

"Dad, can you clean up the salt? I don't want anyone else to get hurt." Charlie asked, "And... and then ould we go and talk somewhere? About mum? And the things she did? I think we need to..."

"Anything for you Charlie. You know that." Lucifer reassured, snapping away the mess.

As they left the kitchen, there was a tiny cry of despair from niffty, who had escaped her confinement too late to play in the Pain Snow.

-----------

Flaming debris rained down upon the few employees Angel had pointed out should probably go down with the ship, as the Studio burned. Husker helped tie the fuckers up.

Bits of Valentino rained down upon them all, as Alastor finished tearing the man to ribbons. Jazz and maniacal laughter filled the air.

A drone paused overhead and Alastor smiled into the camera. "Oh don't get jealous, picture box, you're next on the list!" he coos, and holds upValentino's head. "See you soon!"

The drone jerks away at speed.

Angel fumbles to catch the skull thrown his way, screams and drops it. "No, no thank you I don't need it on my wall, thanks..."

"Ah, a pity."

"Thanks for this... Boss." Angel grins, and feels mild relief to maifest a chain that wasn't pink for once. It disintegrates. "What?"

"You have your freedom, I can't and won't uphold the deal you had with the Moth, it's vile... but if you want a deal wherein I place you in charge of the other souls from the moth and you do what you will with their skills, consent and some funding... that's up to you."

"Whiskers?"

"I'd say read the fine print... but yeah, that sounds like a good deal to me. Any chance you'd let me go, boss?"

"You know, you've caught me in a good mood, why not?"

Husk's chain snaps too.

"Now, who wants to go to my room for a stiff-..." Angel grins, Alastor glares. "drink of some top notch whickey, and we shall renegotiate your potential contracts, hmm? We can come and kill the picture box and the doll another day. Ah, I'm sure dear Charlotte will be delighted to hear of your freedom, Angel! And yours, Husker!"

"Yeah, yeah, love ya too you emtionally repressed murder machine!" Angel grins, pulling the pair of Overlords towards him in an expected hug. Husk makes a confused mrrrp? and Alastor, he made a small Bleat.

Angel's eyes go ROUND in delight, looking at the pair. "Holy fuck, if I knew you guys came with sound effects like that I would've been squishing you into hugs far earlier, that's cute as hell. Like nuggsy-level adorrable..."

"husker, your man seems over-tired and clearly delusional. Do get him under control while I prepare a portal?"

Husk snorts. "You're on your own, Al, anyway I know you're fawn'd of us."

For that, he gets no warning as the floor turns to shadow void.

Husk and Angel would maintain it was worth it though.

Alastor pinches his nose, exhausted. "Ah, but the show must go on, hmmm? Let's see what happens once the curtain rises after such a lengthy... intermission."

His smile fade out last, as the overlord travels to the hotel with his hapless passengers. There were deals to make and Heaven to overthrow... no time to waste!

---------------

End

I had a vague idea and it spiralled, so tired.

[tubetrading]

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[wrenaspun]

how about this:

Damen is an aspiring novelist who has previously professionally sold quite a few short stories and a couple of novelettes to reputable magazines. Now he has written a novel and Laurent is the chief editor at the publishing house where a manuscript reader has insisted that Laurent should buy this novel and publish it. But Laurent is, you know, a bitch. (And is also by the way, a skilled novelist himself although though he hasn't written anything recently because he's busy being a chief editor)

The process of shopping Damen’s manuscript around had been what his agent called ‘unexpectedly bumpy’ — Kashel hadn’t even wanted to tell them about it over email, so Damen had gone to meet her at her office and dragged Nik along for what he claimed was needed moral support and what Nik suspected was a blatant attempt at a set-up. Kashel was ridiculously hot, but he’d been more interested in what she was telling them, her voice low like she was sharing industry gossip.

One of the editors she’d reached out to had gotten back to her saying that Montaigu & Cotentin wanted to take on the project, but it wasn’t Kashel’s contact who would be working with Damen. The editor-in-chief had stepped in personally: a marvellous sign, Kashel told them. It was vanishingly rare that M. de Vere dealt personally with manuscripts anymore, much less anything from a relative unknown. His job description, strictly speaking, was chivvying around all the other editors, and he ran M&C like the navy. It was Kashel’s favourite house to work with for that reason; they hardly ever missed a deadline, though she added (voice lowering further) that she wouldn’t want to be working under M. de Vere, personally.

Nik should have known right then that something was wrong. Well, that mistake was soon corrected. Damen’s first email from M. de Vere was a laundry list of frankly ridiculous suggestions to strip all the originality, the romance, the creativity from the project.

If Damen’s novel had been the product of his holing himself up and writing alone for long stretches of time, Nikandros would be concerned with its fate simply for Damen’s sake; but social as he was, Damen had talked Nik’s ear off as the story took shape in his mind and on the page. Nik had faithfully committed himself to being a rubber duck that sometimes talked back, so he didn’t think he could be blamed for feeling a certain attachment to Mathéo’s limp and missing eye, or Ariston’s tragic cat hybrid backstory, or Gwyn’s fakeout death, which had been a brainstorming session that raged through their small flat for a fortnight before they figured out a plausible way for someone to survive five years on a desolate mountain planet with a poisonous atmosphere. De Vere wanted Damen to kill Gwyn for real, which felt like a pointed insult. What was the point of the whole story if one-third of the central romance was unceremoniously killed off by space pirates?

Damen promptly scheduled a meeting with de Vere — who also lived in Marlas, and who seemed oddly available for someone that Kashel had said was so busy — which meant that Nik was going solo on their usual Thursday evening viewing of the wrestling and Housewives of Ios, but that was a sacrifice he was willing to make on the altar of Damen’s creative integrity, or whatever they called it.

The wrestling had finished and Anafi and Aglaia were well on their way to an all-out slapfight over condiments before Damen finally returned.

“Well?” Nik demanded, sitting up. “How did it go?”

“Oh — fine,” said Damen. His tone was remarkably vague. His face, when Nik craned to look at it, was also remarkably vague, as though the bulk of his attention had been left somewhere else.

Nik knew that look very well. Suddenly M. de Vere’s lack of any profile picture on the M&C website felt deeply sinister. “Damen,” he said. “What’s de Vere like in person?”

“Oh,” said Damen again. And he floated — that was the only word to describe it, and Damen over six feet tall — into the kitchen to poke through the takeout Nik had ordered. Through the doorway, he said, “He’s very nice really… He's published three books himself. He’s younger than me, you know.”

“I was afraid of that,” Nik muttered.

“What’s that?”

“Nothing, nothing,” said Nik. And then, as a terrible thought struck him: “Is Gwyn going to survive the mountains?”

“What?” said Damen. What, like it was just some irrelevant side plot! “Oh,” he continued. “No, I convinced him to see it our way.” By his tone it was impossible to tell whether he meant by spirited debate or by doing unspeakable things to the younger M. de Vere in the restaurant bathroom. Nik decided he didn’t want to know. Damen settled onto the couch with a plate of leftovers in his hand and beatific smile on his face. Nik had an awfully bad feeling about this.

[1moreff-creator]

Hello! Not sure if you share headcanons regarding ships, but if so, then do you have any in regard to Xanace? Feel free to discard this if otherwise ^^

Hello! You know, I don’t think I’ve ever really talked about ships outside of some jokes here and there, but I’ll see what I can do! No Killing Game AU because I don’t know what to do within the KG, and mostly fluff because I'm not an angsty kinda mood :v

Getting Together

-Xander and Ace disliked each other upon first meeting in Hope’s Peak, kinda like canon. You know, Ace’s rudeness annoyed Xander, who scared Ace in return.

-But… they shared classes with Mai, who was hellbent on everyone getting along. Somehow she manages to get them to talk in friendlier terms, and they actually find out they have quite a bit in common. I hope you know enough about Mai for that to make sense.

-They start acting a bit like each other’s impulse control, with Xander getting Ace to back down from meaningless fights and Ace rightfully calling out Xander whenever he gets in too deep in something revolution-related and doesn’t get the help he needs (“what? So you think you’re so much smarter than all of us that you’re the only one that can steal those documents? How about you go sleep for the first time this week and I show you how easy it is!”)

-Ace starts feeling safer around Xander because of his inhuman strength and general protectiveness, and Xander starts feeling like he can relax around Ace. Ace is actually pretty funny when he's not being mean, turns out.

-Ace is actually the one to confess first, and he did it by writing a love letter because he was too scared to say it out loud... prompting Xander to first ask Whit and Arei if they were pranking him, because "there's no way Ace writes in cursive." The misunderstanding got resolved quickly, and they got together.

Fluff

-Ace is uniquely capable of getting Xander our of the worst of moods. If Xander's feeling broody and doesn't wanna talk about it, all he has to do to cheer up is watch Ace's silly antics for a little bit, and he'll be fine.

-Whenever Xander gets pissed off at some form of corruption or another, Ace will join in on the hate, even if he has no idea what the situation is.

-Ace likes calling in Xander whenever he gets scared of something, which is pretty often. There are a few dents in Hope's Peak's walls where Xander threw something at a spider on Ace's behalf.

CW: Eating disorder

-Xander always makes sure Ace eats the right amount and healthily, he's inescapable in this aspect. Funnily enough, Ace actually really dislikes a lot of the food Xander makes (way too spicy for him, it's canon the Rebel eats with a lot of spice), which helps him find the motivation to make proper meals for himself as to avoid being forced to eat those monstrosities. Conversely, Xander actually likes Ace's food... provided he's allowed to add a few metric tons of condiments and spices to it.

CW Over

-Xander gets roped into the Halloween Trio (Veronika-Arturo-Ace) movie nights that Vero drags Ace into. He doesn't actually like horror movies (particularly gory ones), but he enjoys it because Ace consistently clings to him for comfort during the scary parts.

-Xander loves Ace's family, because it's so big. 9 siblings?! He knows it's a little weird, but a lot of them remind him of his own family before they, y'know... so he likes hanging out at Ace's house because it kinda fills that hole in his heart.

-A lot of Ace's siblings make fun of Xander's British accent. He's learnt to accept this. They also make fun of Ace a lot, but they do it less in Xander's presence because he scary.

-So much corruption in the horse racing industry gets exposed, courtesy of Xander. So much.

(I don't actually know how corrupt that industry is but based on a quick google search, and given there's money and gambling involved, I'm assuming "at least quite a bit")

-Arei: "How did Ace Markey get a boyfriend before you?"

Whit: "I guess he was done... horsing around xD" (<- Actually very depressed about this fact)

-David is very supportive, since he wants to support anything his idol friend wants to do. He also happens to be mostly exempt from Ace's insults, since Xander gets sad whenever Ace says something bad about him.

-Ace: "Basically you're stupid and Xander's right."

Min: "Do you have any idea of what we're actually discussing?"

Ace: "No, and I don't need to."

-Xander isn't scared of horses or horse-riding, so he asks Ace if he could take him on a ride some time. Ace finally does it one day, except he rides the horse at Ultimate Jockey speed to get it over with faster.

Xander still isn't scared of horse-riding, but he'll probably never ride behind Ace again.

---

I hope that's enough! Thanks for the ask!

[ippinka]

Uniquely crafted with 100% locally-sourced wheat from Aichi, Japan, the White Tamari Soy Sauce offers a distinctive blend of saltiness, sweetness, and umami.

[dragonblobz]

The Desert Pt 7

Hours pass. At first, with me holding the harness around me, wishing I could hug him. Then, with me leaning the seat back. But I’ve slept enough. I just CAN’T anymore.

I drain the last drops from my Fiji. Stare at the big empty bottle. Crap. I’ll have to get more soon.

My ghost robot, possibly alien car has fallen into silence. Comfortable for HIM maybe. My butt cheeks feel smooshed and I’d KILL for a stretch. And a burger actually……

The scenery around us gradually begins to change. Dessert, and then not. And then I spy the mother of all resources. A sign promising a gas station in 5 miles.

“Hey. Psssst.”

“Yes?”

He answers so quickly. I forget my boredom and smile again.

“I gotta pee, Brobot.”

“You’ve gotta…… what??”

I start to hiss giggle.

“I gotte pee. Loose the damn. Pop a mighty wizz. Knock the pissa.”

Just silence. And that purring engine. I groan and laugh.

“I have to put the water I drank earlier INTO something now.”

“Oh dear Primus….” He sounds so disgusted. Luckily for him, I have zero grasp on modesty. At least he gets it. I think???

“There’s a rest stop ahead. I can pee there. And also get more water and food.”

“Water and food? Ah yes, nourishment. But I’m not sure you should be around others of your kind. No one can know of mine.”

I scowl. It makes my tender face hurt.

“I VOLUNTEERED to be here, Christine. You think I’m gonna go in there and be like…”

I wave my hands around my face and squawk.

“OHMYGOD SAVE ME I’VE BEEN KIDNAPPED BY A VERY COOL ROBOT GHOST CAR THAT I’D PREFER NOT TO BE PARTED FROM BLAH BLAH BLAH. ALSO HE MIGHT BE AN ALIEN.”

“Oh shut up. We’ll stop.” He sounds SO grumpy. I try my best to hug the harness around me.

“Thanks. Thank you!”

We’re going so fast. It’s only about a minute before I see a big brightly lit building ahead. One of those big industrial gas stations. The ones with the walk in booze cooler.

“There!”

I can FEEL him huff around me just as much as hear it. And I giggle and rub my hands on his steering wheel. It’s the only form of affection I can think of to share.

We slow and pull in. I wonder what the people inside must think. Two cars worth well over 2 million dollars apiece just tooting in. It’s not like we’re anywhere near Vegas anymore.

“You’ve got five kilicks before I come in there after you….” An impatient growl around me as the driver’s side door glides open.

“I dunno about kin licks, bruh. But give me 10 minutes.” I’m just laughing as I unbuckle myself from the harness and grab my pack. Thinking about how much everyone inside would shit themselves at a giant robot peeling off the roof like “I’m looking for the annoying one. You seen it?”

I trudge to the building, aware of how much cooler the air feels now. How less dry it feels. And there’s trees all around. It’s CRAZY how far you get going as fast as we were.

There’s not many people inside, but man are they staring at me. At my friends outside. I feel an odd sort of nervousness. I might have needs, but I’d MEANT it when I’d said I’d never say a word. I’d better hurry.

I begin in the large restroom. It’s quiet and empty. Just the muted muffled sound of modern country music wafting thru the whole place.

After doing my business I go to the sink and discover WHY I’d been stared at when I look in the mirror.

Geez. My entire FACE is bruised. Still remnants of dried blood around my nostrils. And my hair looks like two birds have been fucking in it.

I wash my hands and then do the same for my face. Faucet all short and automated and just plain awkward to work with. Using the paper hand wipes instead of the blower to dry. Gently pressing at my face.

No. Nothing broken. But it’s still tender and looks hideous. I use the pick from my pack to tug at my snarled hair as best as I can.

When I exit the restroom, I zoom around the isles. Grabbing up as much as I can. Three more big Fijis. Jerky. And a mouthwatering cheeseburger spinning around in a heated display. Shitty and flappy and no condiments or veggies, and I can’t WAIT to shove the entire thing into my mouth.

On my way to the register, I spy something that makes me stop and grin. Arms all full.

I snatch it up and paw thru the rest of objects like it, looking for another color.

I’m in the car isle. And I’m giddily splurging on my new friends.

I plop the biggest insane armfull of crap in front of the cashier. And he’s looking at me like I might have just escaped from some truly unsavory prison or something, but he starts ringing up all my stuff.

“You okay?” He’s bug eyed. And so I think up a lie and I think it up quick.

“You’ve seen Hangover, right?”

I brandish my pointer finger at the two ridiculous Lamborghinis outside the big sparkling windows.

“I’m rich. I’m dumb. And my friend wants his…..” my eyes flail around my pile of crap.

“… his Tijuana Mama okay??”

I’m well aware of my complete inability to properly socialize. But I’m still COMPLETELY unprepared for this man going from nosey shock to bland disinterest so quickly.

“Alright then.” It’s like he doesn’t even care now???

Lamborghinis are wasted on the rich, I decide. It’s like a free ticket to looking INSANE. I have been ROBBED by my birthright.

I’m grinning at the man as he finishes. He looks so bored now.

“Keep the change.” I say as I collect my debit card from him, every bit aware that there’s no change with this method of payment. And I’m chuckling like a demon imp as I stuff all my crap into my pack. Still chuckling as I exit the building.

“You were dawdling.” Sunstreaker’s voice is an impatient growl as I approach him. He’s kept his drivers side door open this whole time.

“I have a Lamborghini. I do what I want.” I’m giggling as I plop inside of him again and start untangling the harness to fasten around me.

He huffs, his door gliding closed. I hiss with laughter. But…. He doesn’t argue. I fully expect him to….. but he doesn’t. My laughter dies into chortles and then into happy silence.

We leave the gas station. Engine just that nice rumbling purr.

“Hey. Once we get outta sight of this place, pull over.”

“Why…..” He sounds so suspicious. I grin.

“Because I got you presents.”

“Presents?”

He sounds even MORE suspicious.

“Oh yes.” I start giggling again.

He doesn’t respond, and I half expect him to have no response. To just keep going.

But…. We pull over just a few miles down the road.

“I’ve stopped. And you will tell me why.” His voice rumbles in grump around me as I unbuckle myself from the harness.

“Just open up!” I’m so excited. Grabbing my bulging pack as he complies, drivers door gliding open.

“Sideswipe!” I’m SO excited. Hearing a beep. The red Lambo flicks it’s headlights at me behind us.

“You’re bouncing, little buddy. You okay?”

“Oh yes! Just…. Open up! I got something for you!”

I wait impatiently for that drivers door to glide open, then plop my butt in the seat like I own the place.

His charming chuckle bubbles all around me.

“For me?”

“Uh huh!” I dig out the obnoxious pair of bright red fuzzy dice from my pack. And drape it over his rear view mirror.

“One more thing….” I pull the next object out. A little Hawaiian hula lady bobble head. Rip the paper from her base and plop her sticky feet on his dash, giggling madly.

“Do sumthin to wiggle her!”

I jerk as his engine screams under my butt. He’s not moving, but the jolt makes her little head shake. I screech gleefully and clap my hands. Lean forward and kiss the center of his steering wheel impulsively.

“Are you accessorizing me, little buddy?” I can feel and hear him chuckling around me. And I’m laughing too.

“I couldn’t help it. It’s just too cute!”

“You’d better have gotten Sunny something.” More chuckles, these decidedly more wicked sounding. And when I look out the open door, I only see a yellow Lamborghini. But the GRUMP is tangible in the air. I snort and giggle.

“You know I did!”

I exit the red Lambo, and the other car is silent. No purring engine. I’m blushing and I don’t know why.

“Did you think I’d forget about you?”

No response, but that drivers door remains open. I settle inside and start hissing with laughter as I start buckling myself in and the door closes. Engine roaring to life.

We begin moving on the highway. It’s like I can feel him deliberately ignoring me. And I’m just grinning. I just CAN’T be upset. He’s so obviously jealous.

I don’t bother to placate or speak. I just pull the bright yellow fuzzy dice out of my pack and drap them over his rear view mirror. Just smiling so largely.

“Well? Where’s my other thing?” He sounds so butthurt. And I’m just laughing for a few moments before I blush again and fall silent.

“Well… I didn’t get you a bobble head….”

I can FEEL the judgement around me. And I’m blushing too hard to do anything but clasp the last gift out of my pack.

“I don’t need anything from you.”

It does sting. I can admit it. And I’m very quiet while I rip open the scented cardboard tree. Just loop it around his rear view mirror with the fuzzy dice. And then just cling to my harness and wait for him to say more mean things.

But he doesn’t say anything. Just that purring engine beneath me. Long enough for me to nervously explain myself.

“Rose Thorn. It’s…. It’s my favorite scent from this brand. It’s really nice…”

“You’re favorite scent?” He sounds thoughtful. I blush even harder. Feeling so self conscious.

“Yes. I…. I like it a lot….”

“Then I like it as well.” Nothing else. Just the sound of that engine purring around me. All stark and sincere. And I start to smile again, still blushing.

I don’t say anything else. Just blush and turn my head to stare out the window.

We’re in trees now. Forest scrub. I have NO idea where we’re going. And I don’t really care. I’m happy right where I am.

“Hey….”

“Yes?” His voice has that same softness from before.

“You don’t have a radio?”

“A radio? I can. Do you want one?”

I hear the sounds of mechanical warping. Turn my head to watch his naked console morph into……

“Oh my god…” I start giggling. Just looking at the fancy digital stereo system that’s just…. There now.

“You’re wanting music, yes?” and music curls around me inside this car. Muted and low. And I’m snort giggling like a heathen.

“You don’t like it? I like it….” He sounds SO grumpy.

“Is….. is this….. Journey????” I'm just wheezing.

“Well. What do YOU want to hear?” Oh he’s mad. I ignore him. Giggling for a few more moments, and then humming to the song before I answer.

“Naw. I like Journey.” I chortle again and then start to sing quietly. And he doesn’t say anything else. Not for the whole song. Like he’s just listening to my idiot quiet singing.

I’m just smiling and singing and so happy. Who’d have ever thought I’d be singing Wheel In The Sky in a fucking ghost car robot alien???

The song ends. I become silence. The next song begins. I giggle.

“Led Zeppelin??”

“I haven’t heard you tell me what you want to hear.” So so grumpy. I’m just grinning. Pulling that crappy gas station cheese burger out to gobble it down. Finishing it with a huge swig of fresh cold Fiji water.

A honking noise makes me jerk my head as I’m wiping my face and hands with a wrinkled napkin. Sideswipe behind us. Flashing his lights and laying into his horn.

“We’ve got company.” Sunstreaker doesn’t sound worried. He sounds…. Resigned.

I notice another vehicle now. In that mirror outside the window. Another red one. A big cherry red van?

I feel the entire Lamborghini huff around me.

“It’s Ironhide. Act natural.” He sounds so annoyed. And I can’t help but laugh.

“Oh yeah. Sure. Natural. Is he…..” the slight prickles of nervousness. Ironhide. ANOTHER one of them, I can only assume.

“You’re safe.” It’s a final sound. Not necessarily reassurance. But it makes me feel like I don’t have to worry. But I’m still worrying.

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to make trouble.” I feel terrible now. That van is right next to us. Like it’s accompanying us. Or WATCHING us.

“You’re no trouble…” It’s another new tone from him. Protective.

“Okay.” It’s a little nervous croak. And curious. I feel like something big and new is about to happen. I’m just gawping at this big red van cruising next to us.

I hear Sideswipe now. It’s like Sunstreaker is letting him talk again.

“Aw don’t mind Ironhide. He’s a pussy cat.” And that confident chuckle. And it DOES make me feel just a little bit less guilty.

“You just sit tight, little buddy. You’re gonna talk to Prime. Everything is gonna be okay.”

I see the trees around us. Spot a hulk of metal nestled in the side of a mountain ahead of us. It’s enormous. And the road we’re on is care worn gravel. It feels like a SECRET.

“O… Okay….” I feel so oddly nervous. Just cling to this harness around my body.

And it’s Sunstreaker’s voice now. Firm and confident and gentle. And it makes me feel safe.

“I’ll be there the entire time. I won’t leave you.”

Safe. It feels…. Safe….