#Coincidentally the big textbook section was right in front of the checkout counter

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Went to the bookstore today and asked about their mythology section and this frickin guy had the gall to be like "Yeah it's over here, but these are really dense and difficult so let me show you the children's mythology section." I was so baffled I didn't say anything. Normally I would've been very offended, but I couldn't help but laugh because I was like "I've been reading those massive textbook-esque mythology books since I was a literal child as research for my novel, sir. But sure, show me the kid's section, I like reading kids' books too."

[kiseki-no-scenarios]

could you do a scenario where gom+himuro go to the mall etc with their s/o and somehow they get separated for a while without the s/o noticing. suddenly s/he hears an announcement being made “attentionto ___, please pick up your child at the counter” and sees their bf being all pouty that s/he left him behind. I saw a tweet and was inspired! thank you so much :))

Pfft I laughed out loud at this request…I can totally see some of the GOM members just doing it to be petty! Hope you enjoy, anon!

Also some of these are a bit crack-ish…I feel like I’ve been writing some serious things lately so just needed to let go of some mischievous energy~

Reader being paged overhead to pick up GOM at the lost child station

Akashi

You loved going out shopping with Akashi, but your lover could be too much sometimes.

Akashi seemed to have difficulty understanding the concept of “window shopping”; if you even looked at someone for longer than a glance, he’d be ready to call the nearest store associate over to purchase said item.

That led to an awkward discussion in which you insisted that you really didn’t have any burning desire to purchase the item, and it was often hard to convince Akashi that no, you were not lying, and yes, you were being completely honest with him.

It still didn’t stop the fact that sometimes things would just “coincidentally” end up on your desk at school, little gifts that you knew were from a certain redhead.

Wanting to repay the favor, you watched him intensely during the current shopping trip, finally managing to escape away with an excuse about needing to use the restroom.

It was a bit harder to dodge the bodyguards, but a quick dart into the lingerie section took care of that, the sight of lace and negligee even a bit too much for the most stoic bodyguards to be brave enough to step through

You were picking out a lovely silk tie accompanied by a silver tie pin, just having retrieved it from the clerk after you purchased it when you heard it.

“Attention _____, please come pick up your child at the nearest security booth. Attention _____…”

You stomped over to the nearest security booth, apologies already prepared for the frazzled women that was glancing nervously between you and Akashi

Not even a hint of embarrassment betrayed Akashi’s face as he looked calmly over at you, his arms crossed in front of him.

“Seijuro, did you really need to do that?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, _____.” Akashi stated, raising one perfect eyebrow at you. “You left me behind, and thus I employed an available resource to have us reunited.”

You wondered how much trouble you’d get in if you strangled Akashi instead with the new tie you had just bought.

Midorima

You’d left Midorima to his own devices at the bookstore, having picked out the necessary textbooks for the upcoming semester at school

You were browsing in the manga section, satiating your inner fujioshi as you ducked behind the displays, eagerly flipping through the new volumes available from your favorite manga artist

You’d never admit it, but one of the characters looked so much like your boyfriend, and was even a tsundere too!

It was hard to keep back your fan girlish squeals as you tucked the new releases into your shopping cart, knowing that it’d take Midorima a bit longer to finish browsing the study guides section

Your inner thirst momentarily sated, you walked up to your favorite clerk as you passed over the goodies, her face mirroring your smile as the two of you gushed over your findings

It was nice to find someone who understood, especially since you couldn’t ever imagine asking Midorima to discuss such books of such indecent nature with you

You could picture your carrot-kun in your mind saying that, but part of you wondered how adorable it’d be to see him blushing if you forced him to read the manga along with you…something you’d definitely have to consider in the future, of course

“Attention _____, your lost child is waiting for you at the security booth outside the bookstore. Attention _____…”

You quickly finish checking out, racing over with your books in hand as you come across one (1) blushing carrot and one (1) smirking, hawk-eyed basketball player

“Yo, _____-chan!” Takao waved. “I found Shin-chan for you!”

“Aww, Shin-tan, did you get lost?” You peer into Midorima’s eyes, laughing at the disgusted look on his face. “Don’t worry, I’m here now~”

“W-What nonsense, Takao simply dragged me here for no good reason!!” Midorima stuttered

You decided that it would be best to lead your green-haired boyfriend away, lest he be arrested for assault in the middle of the mall.

Aomine

“I wonder if they’ll pop if I stab them hard enough…” You muttered under your breath, sick and tired of the female staff that was hanging off of Aomine’s arm, her breasts pushed up directly against his arm in the middle of the store. There were no way that those things were real, with how perfectly round they looked…

You’d underestimated just how devoted Aomine was to lingerie, of all things. When you mentioned going shopping for some unmentionables during the weekend, he’d invited himself along. To give you an objective perspective, of course.

So why was it that he was surrounded by a gaggle of females, instead of being his usual perverted self and coming up to you with all sorts of scandalous suggestions??

Clearing your throat loudly, you stepped up to your boyfriend, gently (or at least you tried to bed) prying off the hands of the girl that was clinging to him like a barnacle.

“Excuse me, but I think we’ve got enough assistance here.” You used the most sugar sweet voice you could manage, taking Aomine’s hand and not even hiding the fact that you rested his palm against the swell of your breast. “Babe, help me find something in my size?” You asked innocently, peering up at Aomine through your lashes as you pushed your chest against his hand.

Your display of possession finally chased away the mean old biddies as you began pushing Aomine out the door, ignoring his protests. “Babe, cmon…”

“Jeez Daiki, you can at least pretend to not notice.” You pout, sitting him down outside the store. “Wait here while I go finish buying this stuff!”

You hadn’t even had a few moments to yourself when the announcement paged overhead, hearing your name being called out to pick up your….child…from the security booth.

Aomine had a shit-eating grin on his face when you marched up to him, huffing and puffing. “Sorry _____, I just couldn’t wait. Besides…”

You yelped as he grabbed you by your butt, pulling you in as he not-so-subtly grinded himself against your hip. “I have to pay you back for making you mad, hm? This is all for you, babe.”

Kise

You weren’t sure what you had been thinking when you thought that for once, the two of you could enjoy a nice, private, shopping trip to the mall.

It seemed like all of his fans were coming out of the woodwork, in droves as they lunged for your boyfriend, stopping him every moment for autographs and pictures.

You liked that Kise was kind to his fans, but sometimes, enough was enough.

You finally gave up after you were pushed to the side of the crowd, deciding to take a break to go through the newest magazines that had hit the shelves.

Grabbing the nearest one, you discovered an article on said boyfriend as you read it with interest, blushing a bit at the embarrassing pose he had on in the picture.

It was an article about love and relationships, and you read his answers to the interview questions eagerly. You couldn’t help but smile fondly at the way he answered-your relationship couldn’t go public just yet, but it was obvious at least to your eyes that he was talking about you.

There was no need for you to feel insecure about your relationship with him, you thought. You were just about to put the magazine back on the rack when you heard your name being called overhead, asking you to pick up your child from the security office.

One quick checkout later, you were running to the stop when you came across a very familiar figure-even covered in hats, sunglasses, and wrapped up in scarfs like a mummy, you’d be able to recognize Kise anywhere.

“_____-cchi!!” Kise whined, tackling you right as you came into his sight. “Where were you?!?!”

“What are you wearing, Ryouta?!” You asked, quickly unwrapping the scarves that covered his face. “Aren’t you hot underneath all of that?!”

“But we finally had some time together, and I had to figure out something!” Kise replied, tears coming to his eyes as he latched onto you. “Sorry for making you jealous, _____-cchi!!!”

“I wasn’t jealous-“

“Wait, what is that?!” Kise grabbed the magazine out of your hand before you could react, before he turned to you with a pout. “_____-cchi! Do you like my picture more than me?!?! I’m the real thing!!!”

You couldn’t even blame the staff for calling Kise your child, with his crocodile tears and the way he was stubbornly clinging to you while you tried to calm the blonde-haired model down, assuring him that no, you were not going to leave him for a picture of him at a photoshoot.

Murasakibara

Big pouty baby here, 1000000%. When I first got the request, the first person that popped into my mind was our dear Murasakibara

You were visiting him in Akita for the weekend, but the rest of the Yosen basketball team had all demanded to meet up with you too on the outing

Murasakibara was first able to be tamed with snacks as he watched you handing Okamura tissues, listening to him cry his heart out to you about his recent relationship troubles. Then you were scolding Fukui for being mean to Okamura. Liu had somehow started a conversation with you too, and you were busy trying to decipher his speech, while updating Himuro on Kagami’s latest news and how he was starting (just barely) to tolerate Nigou at practice.

Even his coach had gotten involved, and Murasakibara had pouted when you agreed to meet with her for sushi, the two of you forming a bond over how to deal with Murasakibara whenever he got too spoiled or was acting up.

Finally having enough, Murasakibara walked away, crunching the bag of potato chips in his hands. I’m going to crush them all…how dare they take all of _____-chin’s time…

You had just managed to get Okamura to stop crying when you heard your name being called overhead, your brow furrowing in confusion at the odd announcement.

It wasn’t until you were looking around and hearing Himuro commenting about how Murasakibara had wandered off that you’d run over to the security booth, meeting with one very pouty, very upset purple-haired titan.

“I definitely don’t recall giving birth to someone so large, Atsushi.” You commented, tilting your head as you tried to coax Murasakbara into bending down so you could pat his head. “What’s wrong?”

Murasakibara only huffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest as his purple locks hid his face. “Not fair…Not fair, _____-chin. I thought I was important to you.”

“You are, Atsushi!”

“But you’re not paying attention to me.” You couldn’t help but giggle at Murasakibara’s childish whine, his cheeks puffing up as he full on pouted. “_____-chin is mine, and I’ll crush anyone else.”

“Atsu-channnn.” You hugged Murasakibara around his waist, peering up at him as you rubbed your face against his arms. “You’re so cute, and I love you~ I promise to make all your favorites tonight, okay?”

Himuro

Definitely just gets lost because pretty boy has absolutely no sense of direction at all

One moment he was following along with you, just happy to listen to you chattering on as you led him through the mall

But he’d gotten distracted for a moment, catching sight of a pretty necklace in the window of a jewelry store

It’d look nice against your skin, Himuro thought, but when he turned around to catch your attention, he blinked when he realized you were gone.

Himuro walked a bit more, but realized that all it was doing was making him more confused as he circled around the same area twice, looking absolutely lost.

He’d been standing in the same area for several moments, pretending that he knew what he was doing, staring at the map of the mall posted on a kiosk in the center of the hall when a passing security guard finally stopped to ask if he needed help

Himuro felt embarrassed as he admitted the situation that he’d found himself in, and he covered half his face with the palm of his hand as the announcement played overhead, asking for you to pick up your child in front of the security booth.

“Tatsuya, you had me so worried!!”

Himuro apologized profusely to you as he saw the beads of sweat on your forehead. “_____, why are you so sweaty…?”

“Because I was looking for you, silly!” You stuck your tongue out at your boyfriend as you flicked him in the forehead, ignoring his soft “ow” that left his lips. “You have a phone, don’t you?”

Himuro had indeed totally forgotten that he did have a cell phone on him.

“Cellular mobile devices are helpful for contacting someone when you can’t find them, in case you didn’t know.” You lectured him, and even though he was being scolded, Himuro couldn’t help but think you were so adorable, the way your cheeks were puffed up like a squirrel.

“Sorry, sorry.” Pulling you close, he kissed you on the forehead, ignoring your protests that you were super sweaty and gross. “Thanks for finding me, _____. I’ll make sure to hold onto your hand tight the next time so I don’t get lost, okay?”

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