#Ciry of lies
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Before Empress Cirilla even ascended the throne, she herself popularized a term that quickly became widespread accross the continent.
Gaslighting
By way of explination she had used several bizzare examples, none of which had anything to do with gass or light, but the princess was well understood. Gaslighting was being told something is true when memory and blatant reality clearly prove it false.
The person who became most associated with this phrase was the Princess' third great love, Becca of Tigg. Who we were told looks nothing at all like the late Empress (who had definitely not been called Cirilla of Cintra) and who most certainly is not the same exact woman.
#traditional art#the witcher fanart#the witcher 3#the witcher#nilfgaard#cirilla fiona elen riannon#emhyr#emhyr var emreis#empress ciri#duny#False ciri#false cirilla#cirilla of cintra#witcher 3#ciri x false ciri#Emhyr is a lying liar who lies#Ciri is not#Untill she realizes her father's wife is hot
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Jared and Cameron conversation be like
#they are so dumb bro specially Jared like omg stfu literally !!!!!!#he is SO pressed about Cory and America it’s EMBARASSING like you are a grown ass dude shut up#me communicating telepathically with Cameron rn to use the way he threw everyone under the bus to make Jared the target#don’t get me wrong. Cameron is going to jury soon. but Jared irks me so much maybe we can make him go next week#the way he is so dumb he might even consider using the veto and Cameron lies on putting jag just to put Cirie this mans is so dumb he might#AnYways all I know is America Cory and meme made jury iktr !!!!!!#bb25#big brother
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Not surprised that the America and Blue final two didn't really hold up, and America told Cory about Blue wanting to put him up. The ongoing problem for any combo of America/Blue/Cory/Matt/Jag is that as much as they enjoy hanging out together, they've all ratted on each other at different times and have very little trust amongst each other.
#bb25#this is why jared's lies were so successful with them for so long#they're an odd group#their loyalty amongst each other was weak and cirie was able to exploit that for a while 🤷🏿♀️
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don’t hate me y’all but some people on twitter are mad that felicia would lie for no reason and like i think that’s kinda a reach? clearly she’s a bad ally for cirie but she’s also playing to win. it’s a decent move to make if it works. but ya she lied or sold her out idk which, not cause she’s jealous (she may be idk but it’s not only that) and not for no reason, but because she wants to see herself win not someone else. i know that’s something ciries stan’s have had trouble accepting this season but that is literally the game
(i don’t like it btw but speaking objectively the move has a purpose it’s just one we might not like)
#bb25#my last sentence was snarky i’m sorry!#and it’s not her fans it’s the uber stan’s that i mean#like felicia lied to increase her positioning in the game#because the rest of the people do actually want to win#it’s not their faults they were cast on a season with cirie#i don’t like when cutie gets in trouble and i’m positive she can get out of it#but ya like it’s not for no reason
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@potestmagice
@okruchlodu
#life is just a classroom (victoria thoughts.)#wanna kiss you make you feel alright (victoria and alex.)#do you call yourself a fucking hurricane like me (alex thoughts.)#we could be the horizon (alex and victoria.)#flights of the soul (hope thoughts.)#wherever you stray; i follow (esme thoughts.)#no lies in my eyes; nothing but truth will leave my mouth (ula meribella thoughts.)#a lot underneath the surface (cascadia christina thoughts.)#ripped at every edge but you’re a masterpiece (hoa thoughts.)#dancing freely through life (anastasia thoughts.)#being clever always got me very far; so far (daxa thoughts.)#unravel the mystery of my mind (joanna thoughts.)#i pick up a pen and bleed (alanna thoughts.)#burning feathers (di thoughts.)#never cruel or cowardly (diana thoughts.)#sets our hearts aflame (diana and the first professor.)#(diana: re: anything for the crown crown crown.)#torn out pages (camille thoughts.)#made me breathe again (camille and erik.)#not all flowers and rainbows (lydia thoughts.)#enchanted to be with you (lydia and maria.)#ceiling drips with blood and ink (gabby thoughts.)#words cannot describe the beauty of this love (gabby and tina.)#your loyalty never wavered (gabby and aashley.)#oh pas une femme qui pense...l'horreur (antoinette thoughts.)#reality is finally better than my dreams (antoinette and the second professor.)#(antoinette: re: a waking dream.)#whispering in the wind (ciri thoughts.)#I want to make you happy (ciri and yennefer.)#(ciri and yennefer okruchlodu tbt.)
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Debunking misinformation about Netflix's The Witcher (Part 1)
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7]
"Henry Cavill is a massive fan of the books and the games and he quit the show because the writers wouldn't stick to the books and he just cares about the source material so much."
Henry Cavill not only did not know that the books existed when he started pursuing the role of Geralt, but he actually thought that the books were based off of the video games (and he still didn't bother to read them) and he didn't learn that the games were actually based off the books until Lauren told him (even though the first thing in the game credits is that they're based off the books); as of 2021, he as only read the full series once — right before he was cast in 2018; while he has played TW3, he has only played a little of TW2 (and I've never found any evidence that he's played the first game); and he also has not played the DLC for TW3.
Henry Cavill also started heavily pushing the narrative that he's just such a massive fan of the books and how important adhering to the source material is to him during the press for S2 to deflect from how it was due to his acting choices of cutting Geralt's lines and either saying nothing or just grunting instead that Geralt's characterization — who is much more verbose in the books — was book inaccurate in S1:
He also lied about the situation and tried to act like Geralt was never originally written as being verbose and blamed the lack of dialogue on Yennefer and Ciri's prominence, which cannot be true as confirmed by Lauren:
And tried to act like the lines he was cutting weren't that important anyway so it wasn't really a big deal, which also cannot be true as confirmed by Joey:
He also started pushing the narrative that adhering to the source material is so important to him and it's 'tricky' to do that with Lauren's vision, but his definition of "Lauren's vision" is the show being an ensemble piece with Yennefer and Ciri at the forefront (like the books) and the show in general heavily centering around women (like the books):
So the idea of him caring so much about "book accuracy" is, in fact, not accurate to the books at all as his problems were the prominence of women in the show when Ciri is the main character of the main book series, which the show started adapting from S2 onwards (which is when Henry Cavill started to complain about wanting "book accuracy" in the first place), and when women are very prominent, central, key figures in the books and they often drive the plot forwards.
Lastly, S3 was the closest adaption of the books out of all the seasons so far, so the idea that he quit after S3 because the writers just weren't respecting the source material and the show wasn't following the books doesn't make any sense anyway.
"Henry Cavill is the only reason why the show was even close to the source material at all."
I've not only never seen any evidence of this, but if anything, I've seen the exact opposite: Henry Cavill was either directly responsible for or at least contributed in some way to a lot of things that went against the books or didn't happen in them.
As I already pointed out, he cut Geralt's lines in S1 and either said nothing or just grunted instead which is inaccurate to Geralt's characterization in the books. Here's another quote from Joey affirming that:
(Just to note: During the press for S1, he frequently talked about how the games inspired his performance as Geralt — sometimes talking about them even more than the books despite how the show is based off of the books, not the games — and it wasn't until S2 press that he suddenly changed his tune and started talking about how important adhering to the source material ie the books is to him. He also only started advocating for a more book accurate Geralt because he got dunked on by reddit for his book inaccurate performance in S1.)
He didn't want to play Geralt and Jaskier's friendship as directly as in the books and buddy-buddy with each other:
He didn't want to have any kind of conflict in Geralt and Ciri's relationship in S2 — at least on Geralt's side of things:
Nor play Geralt struggling with fatherhood at all — all of which led to the domino effect of Yennefer's betrayal:
Eskel's death (which in itself also led to things like Vesemir trying to create new witchers and Lambert's attitude toward Ciri):
And Voleth Meir being the big bad of the season:
He didn't want Geralt and Triss to even just platonically find comfort in each other in S2 — which is what happens in the books:
youtube
He nixed a sex scene between Geralt and Yennefer in S2 because he didn't think it'd be in character of them to have sex after reuniting which, uh, is absolutely in character of them:
While this is an incredibly inconsequential change, given the prevalence of this idea that Henry Cavill is such an ardent defender of the source material ie the books and how much he wanted the show to adhere to them, I do think it's important to note that he pushed for — and got — more signs into the show even though by his own admission that is more of a game thing than a book thing and he got it into the show for the explicit purpose of catering to game stans:
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This is also another incredibly inconsequential change, but again, given how prevalent the idea of Henry Cavill pushing for perfect source accuracy is, I do just want to point out that he would wear his armor 24/7 to make it look worn down:
Even though it is canon in the books that Geralt will buy himself brand new clothes, so the idea that Geralt's clothing has to look worn down and can't be brand new is not actually book accurate.
"Lauren wanted to make Roach's death a joke."
Just to address this point specifically, Lauren wanted to make a meta reference about how all of Geralt's horses are named Roach. That in no way, shape, or form means that she wanted to make Roach's death into a joke or even that the scene had to be played comedically. This is what Lauren had to say about the subject and the 'joke' in question (which, js, actually fits the tone of the books more):
And as far as the "Henry Cavill is the only one who cared about the source material and he's the only reason why the show even stuck to the books at all" front goes... Henry Cavill did change the dialogue in this scene to a book quote/reference; however, the quote in question ("Enjoy your last walk across the meadow and through the mist. Be not afraid of her for she is your friend.") is not something that Geralt himself says and the line/scene from the books foreshadows Geralt's ending in them.
So, at least imo — especially taking into account the incredibly high standard the fandom has set for Henry Cavill as the #1 defender of the books — I don't think this change was actually book accurate especially given the narrative significance of that exchange in the books.
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“I mean, you’ve got to feel a little sorry for them really haven’t you?” Jaskier said from where he was mopping up the last of the evidence of the half dead rat Roach had thoughtfully decided to gift them (the first time it happened he’d shrieked in surprise before Geralt put it out of its misery with a matter of fact “Welcome to country living, city boy”). Geralt gave a non committal hum from where he was warming milk up for Ciri on the stove. The little girl sat colouring at the large kitchen table - too large for two, but that would change when Geralt’s brothers and any guests they decided to bring descended on them.
“I mean they’re just minding their own business like, Oh I’m a hungry rat. Please don’t kill me.” Here Jaskier put on a slightly squeaky voice and held up his hands in imitation of paws, still holding onto the mop, “And then wham one of the last things they see is Roach’s teeth coming towards them. So many teeth.” He gave the resident farm cat a critical stare and received a dismissive tail flick in response.
Ciri giggled at his antics which caused him to grin back at her in return. It always felt like a special sort of personal victory when he managed to coax a laugh out of the little girl.
Despite being together for six months, he was still being introduced to her as her father’s ‘friend’ (which was true enough, they wouldn’t be dating if they didn’t get along) and Jaskier was happy to go along with it. Geralt had explained without revealing too much that the little one had been let down by too many adults in her life already, himself included, and ‘boyfriend’ was maybe just a little too official sounding for the time being (and if he said his heart hadn’t broken a little for the five year old smiling at him from Geralt’s phone, he’d by lying), especially after the shit that had gone down with his ex. Geralt hadn’t gone into detail but from what Jaskier had gathered, the woman had had a hidden agenda in wanting to get back with Geralt and Ciri had almost gotten seriously hurt as a result. Geralt had blamed himself for jumping back into the relationship too quickly and so, any potential partners now had to pass what Jaskier had dubbed ‘The Ciri test’.
He liked to think he’d passed the first portion with flying colours, the tiny blonde seeming perfectly comfortable with him in public places. Now they were dipping their toes into Jaskier staying in their home for longer periods, with Jaskier having graduated from the guest bedroom to sharing with Geralt the previous visit (the brunette wanting the ground to swallow him up when she happily informed her Uncle Eskel of ‘Daddy’s sleepover’ when the man had dropped by unexpectedly the following morning. Geralt had just shrugged and told him to be thankful it hadn’t been Lambert; who could and would, happily take the piss forever).
“Alright Ciri, put your things away and then go get your bedtime book. I’ll be in in a minute.” Geralt said, pouring the warm milk into a plastic My Little Pony cup.
“I want Jask.” Ciri declared form where she was trying to force the crayons back into their box by the (relatively small) handful, Causing both adults to stop what they’d been doing and stare at one another. This was new.
“You sure you don’t want daddy?” Jaskier asked, looking to Geralt for some sign as to what he should do.
“You do better funny voices. Daddy’s all sound the same.”
It took everything Jaskier had not to burst out laughing at that as he took in the minute eye twitch from the other man at that statement, “Geralt?”
Geralt nodded, “Mind if I stay and listen? You know how much I love The Gruffalo.”
Jaskier snorted and felt a surge of fondness. The lies we tell for our children.
It ended up being a joint effort, with Geralt guest starring as The Gruffalo “On account of you being so, well...gruff.” and admitting to a slightly too smug looking Jaskier and a mostly asleep Ciri that “Yes, Jaskier does better voices for everyone else. Especially Mouse.”
"Everything ok? You’ve gone all quiet on me.” Jaskier said from where he had his head in Geralt’s lap as they watched some mindless Netflix show. “I didn’t overstep did I?” He was suddenly frantic, his anxieties bubbling back up to the surface now that he didn’t have a performance and an audience to focus on, “I know you probably just said yes so things wouldn’t be awkward. I probably should have told her no and come up with an excuse but how can anybody say no to that face-“
“Jaskier. It’s fine, honestly.” Geralt said, rubbing his hands up and down Jaskier’s arm in a way he knew calmed him, “I’ve built up something of an immunity to Ciri’s puppy eyes. I would’ve said no if I had a problem with it. I’m just thinking.”
“About?”
“About how I might have a question for Ciri.”
The next morning saw Jaskier seeing both of them off with a hug (also accompanied by fishing a stray cheerio out of Ciri’s hair which he had been too tired to question) before heading back to his city apartment and his job as a music tutor.
“Ciri?” Geralt asked, putting her school backpack by the door as he knelt down to help her button up her coat, “You know how Aiden is Uncle Lambert’s boyfriend?"
It had slowly been killing Jaskier not to check his phone as soon as the text notification came through but he was nothing if not professional and he would not check his phone when he was in the middle of a lesson. Thank the Gods he did wait as he was prettu sure he gave his retreating student a minor heart attack with the squeal he let out at Geralt’s message:
‘Ciri has been proudly announcing to her classmates this morning that Jaskier is her daddy’s boyfriend. Much disappointment from the single mums.’
#the witcher#the witcher fanfiction#witcher jaskier#jaskier#jaskier x geralt#jaskier/geralt#geralt/jaskier#geralt x jaskier#geraskier#kid ciri#witcher geralt#geralt of rivia#geralt
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this is why i can't feel bad for y'alls faves btw 😭"why is no one targeting the SHOWMANCE >:(" well part of the problem is they keep trying to navigate these attempts to do so... through the other half of the showmance? blue and felicia telling america they want cory out, izzy and jared telling cory they want america out. hello!
i know i didn't just see felicia pitch getting rid of cory to AMERICA djskdjsk she's so real and yet so insane?
#bb25#cirie is the only one who takes the actual relationship seriously and is thus the only one smart enough to know to keep it cute game-wise.#america/cory will never know if she wants one or the other out. lolol.#hell even cameron smiled in america's face and lied out his ass this entire backdoor plot.#nobody else is gonna be successful because they don't take the -mance of it all seriously anyway. their fault!
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Disappearing Bodies
Pairing: PolyFeysand x Reader
Summary: girls from several war camps have been disappearing, no one know how. So you, your high lord and lady try to investigate the case.
Warnings: dead bodies, murder.
A/N: heyy everyone! I know I haven't posted in forever, thats because I've had my biggest writers block ever. I tried to make this as interesting as possible; please consider leaving a comment and telling me your thoughts on this. Hope you like it!!!
And yes, I will be posting the part 2 in a few days.💕
Thanks for the request @shorttstackk.
Masterlist
○●○●○●○
Your eyes scan over your desk again, trying to find anything that can help you with this case. This new case has you working non stop, racking your brain to think of anything that can help solve this problem.
There have been reports coming in from almost every illyrian camp, complaints of females and young girls going missing without a foot print left behind. Nobody knows what's happening to those girls because none of them have been found yet.
Cassian has had his men search the entire Illyria, along with himself, Nesta and Morrigan to try and find some type of clue or location, but they have all come back with no avail. You and Azriel have been looked in his office, trying to find something in the files but that, too, doesn't help you at all.
Files are sprawled all over your desk. Some stating the names of the victims and some reporting thier last seen location. It's been eight days and twenty six victims, and that's all you know.
You sigh and close your eyes, head hung down as you go over the information you have, again, to just find something, anything that can help you find those innocent girls.
"Here." A thug filles the silence and your eyes open to see Azriel putting down a cup of tea. You straighten up from where you were standing with your arms rested on the edges of your desk.
Whispering a small thank you, you pick up the cup with one hand and stir the spoon with the other. Your eyes again looking at the names scribbled on the paper.
Calantheria
Lyriana
Cirys
"Did you find anything new?" Azriel asks, sipping his from his own cup.
"No. You?" Your eyes look at his.
"None of my spies have picked on anything." His voice is calm, a contrast to the storm swirling in his eyes.
"How can this be possible?" Your eyebrows narrow in anger and frustration. "How can a someone be so clean in abduction that they don't leave a single thread behind?"
He hums, eyes analyzing the files. "Whoever it is, they are too good at covering thier tracks."
Silence fills the room again as the two of you fall quite, drinking the tae and thinking about the same thing again.
You were Azriel's second before finding your mates, the High Lord and Lady of Night Court. It was a surprise to everyone when you found out, considering how rare it is to find one mate, and finding two at that.
Three mates are extremely rare cases, only one out of a thousand pairs can you find a tripple pair. You were invited into the inner circle right away, everyone was kind hearted towards you.
But even though you were practically Azriels equal, you would never admit that. He taught you everything you know about spying and assassin ship. For you he will always be your senior.
The quiet between you was suddenly intrupted when Rhysands voice fills your head and the two of you leave everything and rush out of there as fast as possible.
Come to my office. Cassian found something.
-☆-
The eight of you stand surrounding a table, on which lies a map of the Illyrian Forest.
"A few of my men stumbled upon an underground tunnel. While patrolling, one fell in, not knowing about the cave because it was covered up with branches and leaves." Cassian circles an area with ink. "This is where the cave is. We went in just to make sure it isn't some small hole or anything, and it isn't. The hole stretches out into a gaint cave after entering, big enough for all of us to fit in."
He glances at everyone before continuing, "There were bloody footsteps at the starting of the tunnel. A pair of them, one can be identified as a male and other a female."
The air thickens around the room, all of you worrid and a little relieved to find at least something relating this case.
"I'm not sure what is in it, but I didn't have my men search it, if this isn't the seriel criminal we want, but some entirely different creature , I'm not losing my men for nothing." He finishes and Rhysand hums, silently agreeing.
"Alright then, we will go to see what this is." Rhysand looks up at you all, waiting for you to nod and continues, "Amren will stay at Valaris, guarding while we're gone. Nesta can watch over the War camps, so that if any other kidnapping happens, she can inform us right away."
The both of them nod and even though Nesta looks like she wants to say something, she doesn't dare go against Rhys' orders. Cassian interlaces his fingers with hers, as if to say not to worry.
"I will enter the cave first, Feyre, Y/N, Azriel, Cassian, and Mor will follow after. Cassians soldiers will stay at the cave entrance in case we encounter the very criminal we are looking for." Everyone nods.
"Any questions?" Rhys looks at everyone with raised eyebrow.
When no one comments he stands up straight and extends his arms to you and feyre at each side of him, ready to winnow you out. Azriel mimics him and grabs hold of Cassian. Mor takes Nestas hand to drop her off at the camps first and follow us after.
"Let us go." Rhysands voice echos out as you all fade into darkness.
-☆-
You walk through the woods with the others. Cassian leading your group and the rest of you follow close behind.
The entrance Cass found is surrounded with trees and grass, making it impossible to notice except the way it was found.
You reach there and Cass nods to one of his gaurds stationed near it. He turns to your group as you all stop with him, he points the hole, big only enough for one person to fit through.
Rhysand jumps in first and you all follow one by one. You go after Feyre and step up, looking around. It looks just like a normal Cave. Alighted with fire by cassian's comrades.
"Alright, I did not expect the cave to be this big." Mor's eyes scan over the walls with interest, before she looks at Cassian. "Sure you said it'd be big but I didn't expect this big. I mean you could fit an entire house in here."
Rhysand forms a small flame in his hand and steps forward taking the lead, "Everyone be on your gaurd." He doesn't need to remind you.
You walk between Rhysand and Feyre, her hand held yours in a tight grip, the only sign of her anxiousness. You walk further and further into the dark, the walls only illuminated by Rhys purple fire.
Suddenly you see a flicker of orange ahead, all of you noticing it at the same time as your steps falter for a second before continuing without making a sound. You step closer and finally see the scene ahead of you.
Your breath catches as you realized just what is happening. Candles surround a body of a girl, creating a circle in which the body is kept. She lies there as still as stone, eyes closed and not even breathing. The light from the candles shine against her skin that is now as pale as snow and lips that was probably soft and pink now cracked and blue.
Your hand slips from Feyre's as you step forward enough to see the face clearly. This is one of the girls you were looking for. Her name is Lyriana.
No. Was.
Now she's gone. Dead just as you expected. You still remember how her parents had begged you to find her when she got lost. How they begged you to find her and bring her back alive, offering you anything you wanted in return.
She was one of the firsts that was lost, it had been a week yet her parents never lost hope, knowing that their high lord and spymaster will find her. Well, you guess they did do that part.
"Is that-" Azriel starts but you speak before he could, knowing what he will say.
"Lyriana. Age 16. Single child. 7 days missing. A Valkerie in training. One of the first victims." Your voice sounds bland, void of any emotion and your mates pick up on the ill feelings starting to swirl inside you immediately.
"This isn't good." Mor comments under her breath.
"Oh yeah? What gave it away? The fire or the dead body?" Cassian replies just as slowly, his tone a mixture of sarcasm and anger.
You take another step closer to the body and just as Rhysand is about to warn you not to get too close, a sudden snap sounds and a hand wraps around you foot, the fingers clutching on tight enough to break bones;
And pulls.
You gasp out in pain, not expecting the attack and fall on your back. Your head hitting the hard ground but paying no mind to it, you take out a knife sheathed at your waist and thrust it on the hand with force.
At the same time a blast of purple fire hits the arm holding your foot. The force of your attacks together results in the arm cutting and blasting off into a mush of blood and muscle. An extremely unsettling site.
The blood flies to your body, small droplets smearing onto your leathers as you quickly brush off the remains of the fingers around your ankle and stand up. Soft hands hold you as Feyre forces you to step back with her and Rhysand stands before you, ready for another attack.
Now that out of danger, you see the arm that tried to hold you captive belongs to the very girl you declared dead. She now kneels and stands on her hands and knees, arching her back in an unnatural way. The eyes that were closed and peaceful, now are wide open and frowning at the lot of you with anger. You take in a sharp breath when you realize that her eyes doesn't have irises, they are entirely white white red nerves siding at the edges.
The hand that was blasted off, still driping tons of blood but it is as though she doesn't feel anything because she lets out a low growl before standing and streaking out her next attack.
Everyone is ready this time though, before Rhysand even lifts a finger, shadows cover Lyriana's entire body, slithering around like ropes and contract their hold. Thightly binding her limbs to her body and enabling her to do anything except squirm around on the ground, trying to fight.
Everyone stays silent for a while, only her growling and hissing echoing through the space, widened eyes staring shocked at Lyriana's state. She behaves as though she doesn't know anything but attacking.
Rhysand turns to you and pulls you into his arms, "Are you alright?" His soft voice breaks the dark fog starting in your mind. You nod silently and rest your head against his shoulder. Feyre kneels at your side and gently touches the ankle that now covers a ring of dark red bruises in shape of a hand.
You step back a little to see the wound for yourself, half cresents form where the tip of the fingers were, stretching out into small sharp straches, oozing out little blood that was already starting to heal.
You sigh and step around them as they straighten up, "I'm fine. Let's keep going."
#acotar#acotar fandom#acotar fanfiction#rhysand x reader#feyre x reader#feyre x rhysand#feyre x rhysand x reader#feyre fanfic#rhysand fanfic#acotar angst#acotar action
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Geralt accidentally developing Dad Humor, even when he wasn't actively invested in or looking for Ciri- it just happens by rule of the universe
like this,
Jaskier falls from a tree, off a small ledge, down a short hill
Jask: Geraaaalt, I've hurt my leg!
Geralt: sigh, fine. Let me look
...hmm...
Geralt: we'll have to amputate
Jaskier: GERALT
-one more-
Jaskier: EUGH- Geralt! There's a nasty bug on my pillow
Geralt: let me see...ah, it's a brain sucker
Jask: brain sucker?!
Geralt: yes, don't worry
*he flips over and lies down again*
Geralt: it starved
please please please, Geralt dad humor
#she speaks#the witcher#witcher#jaskier#geralt#the witcher season 3#twn#geraskier#dad humor Geralt is the best#dad geralt is simply the best as well#sneezes super loud too
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Totally random prompt: Parent Trap BUT #justiceformeredith.
Ciri1 and Ciri2 meet and they want to bring their parents Geralt und Yennefer back together. Problem Geralt is happily engaged to Jaskier, who is too pretty, too young and too high maintance for Geralt... at least in Ciris' eyes.
Jaskier really trys with the girls and doesn't even loose his kindness confronted with a lizard (even though he was scared). Geralt is disappointed with his girls how they treated the love of his life, but Jaskier calmed him down and also reminded him of this mistakes with the girls ("you forget, you lied to them about their existing? I am fine").
At the end Yennefer and Geralt figured out how to co-parent and Yennefer even met her future wife Triss at Geralt and Jaskier's wedding.
Omg I Love that!!! We love healthy coparenting
#geraskier#geralt x jaskier#geralt x dandelion#the witcher#geralt loves his bard!#witcher fanfiction#fanfiction prompts#writing prompts#established relationship#the parent trap#witcher alternate universe
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amy after seeing that vid from mike’s tumblr i can’t stop thinking about early 2010’s tumblr moot art :’( he follows you one day and you don’t think much of it but then all of a sudden he’s liking every single one of your posts and commenting stuff like “ ❤️ this!” under your writing and when you go to check his blog you’re so confused cause it’s all about his friends and tennis and video blogs and motivational quotes but you follow him back anyway cause despite the graininess he looked really cute in his videos!! not even a few minutes later he’s sending you a dm saying “thank you for the follow back :)” and you start talking regularly and!! if you’re a smut writer it eventually gets brought up in the convo and you find out there’s a lot that lies under art’s soft innocent exterior 🙂↕️🙂↕️
Frnchgirls you delivered once again 😫😫😫
Tumblr user donaldsonart1, he's so adorable :( liking and reblogging everyone's posts because he wants to see the people grow more and more famous, to have their blogs be really loved and appreciated. You question how did he really make it to the fanfiction side of tumblr, especially your own blog, because you mainly write smut about Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. Later, you discover that he really fucking loves Harry Potter.
He looks young too, in his early 20s, you presume, and it's easy to notice he's into tennis. His blog is simple, not too aesthetically decorated, and his bio just says "tennis is love, tennis is life :)" and his profile picture is a slightly blurry photo of him in front of some big ciry skyscraper. Simple but really cute.
Donaldsonart1 uses an awful amount of emoticons as well, his favourite being :) >.< and :3 which makes you think that sometimes you're texting a sixteen year old girl. He's really sweet and sends you pictures of Wolfstar fan arts. That's when you begin noticing certain cracks in his innocent attitude, and little hint of something you people know as nsfw. It starts simply with Art letting you know about his attraction towards certain people, the most mentioned ones being Roger Federer and Hilary Duff.
donaldsonart1: did you see what i reblogged?
donaldsonart1: about the movie cinderella
donaldsonart1: i really like the actress :) she's very pretty
And then a few days later, he really fucking lets loose.
donaldsonart1: i watched a match with roger federer yesterday. he's really good
donaldsonart1: idk why they're dressing him in these tight shirts
donaldsonart1: i wrote a smut about him btw, would you like to see?
donaldsonart1: :)
You read it, of course. Staring at your phone screen with an open mouth, you have a hard fucking time closing it because this is by far the most violently pornographic piece of art that you have ever read. Something so incredibly filthy that you almost doubt someone so angelic looking has actually written. These are not the words of the baby faced guy who's been living in your DMs for the past few weeks.
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had an image in my head of morvran (especially early on morvran) discovering that hed been given the unprecedented honour of courting the emperor's own daughter. he wouldnt faint on the spot, but he might later lol. you know, while im pretty sure that the info was kept from him by emhyr can you IMAGINE if it was just left out of the package like smelling lies was? Big Yikes.
When Morvran finds out who Ciri's bio-father is, he is in fact going to have Strong Emotions about it.
Poor lad.
But no, it wasn't left out of the information packet. Emhyr's playing that one very close to the vest.
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In Jaskier's childhood, whenever he was injured or ill, his parents would tell him that he was exaggerating his symptoms in order to make the situation worse. Throughout his life, Jaskier had learned how to hide his injuries and sicknesses except those that were really serious, such as the time he was bed-ridden with a high fever for weeks on end. In the same vein, Geralt did not pay attention to Jaskier's pain unless he was literally dying. Jaskier kept silent after Rience burned his hand.
Considering everything going on in Kear Morhen, Jaskier has no right to complain. Then Jaskier's hand get infected and he falls very sick. When Jaskier lies in bed with a dangerously high fever, he can hear Yennefer and a few other Witchers nearby. Wondering why he did not speak up. Geralt desperately reassures Jaskier that everything will be okay
Geralt asks why Jaskier didn't say anything about what Rience had done to him a few days after Jaskier fever broke. Jaskier tries to play it off as if it was nothing but a little burn that wasn't so bad. However, Geralt yells about Jaskier almost dying. After a moment or two, Jaskier started to cry a little bit thinking Geralt is mad at him. As Jaskier cries, he is upset that they are worrying about him and his burns when they have other things to worry about.
In that moment Geralt realizes that Jaskier truly believes that his suffering is something that should either be ignored or punished for it.
When Geralt thinks about how he contributed to Jaskier's state of mind, his heart sinks.
Geralt tells Jaskier how brave he was for not succumbing to Rience's torture and how thankful he is for Jaskier's help in protecting Ciri. Geralt reassures Jaskier that it is safe for him to ask for help when someone has hurt him and that simply sneezing will never lead to him being beaten up again. 
Eventually, Geralt will tell Jaskier that being scared is okay, because he is not alone. As Jaskier sits there in the midst of Geralt's arms, he just tears up telling Geralt everything that has happened to him since they parted on the mountain. From being the sandpiper to Rience. As for Geralt, he is just holding Jaskier.
#the witcher netflix#joey batey#geralt of rivia#jaskier the witcher#the witcher#henry cavill#the witcher jaskier#geralt x jaskier#fic ideas#geraskier#jaskier#gerskier#headcanon#cirilla fiona elen riannon#freya allan#anya cholatra#yennefer of vengerberg
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I feel so drained. It's been such a week. The same pain we're all feeling, of course, with a few extra things thrown in for fun. Animal death to follow, if you don't want to deal with that.
The kids all adapted readily to a classroom environment, despite my worry, and did so well so calmly that I'm very proud and much reassured. It was still four plus hours away from the house every day. They all helped keep the chores done, so the drain was mainly psychological. But I don't like driving, and sorry everyone, I don't like being in town. The seagulls I could hear from my parked car the fourth day were almost hilariously welcome. Parking lot rats, but that reminder that nature exists was a balm to my soul.
Kiki died yesterday. He'd been in rough shape, but still enjoying life. We knew it was a matter of time til something critical failed, and that there wasn't anything likely to help him short of truly major expensive things that still might well not help. Then he declined rapidly this week. I held him for the last three hours. He cried terribly if he wasn't held, and Phantom had to hold him while I got dressed, so at least we know being held was a comfort to him. It was an expected death, and timely in its way, but when at last he didn't draw another breath, I was so, so tired.
I put him where Ciri could check him out and understand, however her mind understands these things. I didn't think to do that when Hrothgar died, and Ciri went around the house meowing for him for a week. It seems to have worked, because she's quiet today. After he died, I went straight to bed and slept til it was time to leave for class, and then stayed parked next to the class and slept in the car.
When I woke up, the car wouldn't start. Left something on, I guess, though I couldn't figure out what. Jacob was on his way home, but turned around, and the car jumped and started up just fine. In fact, before @mythicalfungi0-0 's dad showed to collect her, so before we would have left anyhow. So again, nothing but a psychological drain, really.
On the way home, we listened to music--Phantom has some great tunes fit to the times that I'll have to share with you. After a period of silence, I said, "OH! We need crocus bulbs." And Phantom said, "Oh! Right!" to the bewilderment of the Borrowed Girl. Crocuses, to go on Kiki's grave, next to Hrothgar's by the pond. It lies next to a large rock projecting from the ground. Someday we'll etch their names into the stone. I've ordered them, in a different color than the ones on Hrothgar's, so that we can think of both of them when they bloom.
I got a good night's sleep last night. Spoke to my friend who fosters kittens this morning. Today, I will keep planting flowers. I think the future will have flowers.
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Yandere! Geralt of Rivia headcanons.
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Probabilities that your loved ones will be killed.
Let's start by talking about the fact that he already has experience killing both humans and monsters or creatures that escape our imagination, or even people of other races.
But he usually doesn't want to apply it, if he can avoid spilling blood, he will. Although some of them probably end up dying, more out of self-defense than out of his jealousy.
My guess is a 30% chance, the only exception is that those people ARE dangerous to you but you refuse to accept it.
First impressions
You met him because he saved your life. Whether by humans or monsters, or other creatures.
You were infinitely grateful to him, to the point that you insisted that he can always come to you if he needs help or a place to stay.
Even with sex or not involved, we can assume that he ends up accepting your offer, even if he didn't initially want it.
Unlike other people, you always treated him like another human being; It wasn't difficult for him to trust you seeing how kind you were, although at first he doubted your true intentions more than once.
Fall in love
You both got along well, even with all the negative comments from people you knew, you just thought they were people's exaggerations.
After the first time you welcomed him into your home, he felt that one day he would have to come back to visit, even if it was for something as minimal as buying supplies or upgrading his armor and/or tools. That idea of returning crossed his mind several times, until he visited you again.
You recognized him instantly, and greeted him as if you were seeing a great friend. Both of you shared a moment together where they told how things had gone since the last time they had been together. If you pay attention, you will notice that he seems more open or even more relaxed than usual.
Geralt didn't know why he felt so much trust with you, but he liked that feeling; he couldn't deny the fact that he preferred being with you over other people. It took him quite some time to realize the reality of his feelings.
Although you assumed that he constantly visited you or that he enjoyed your presence it was because he fully trusted you as a trusted friend, the reality was different.
And you didn't notice it until you saw that every time he visited you (we assume once a month or even more), he seemed more attentive to you or flirted with you more regularly.
Beginning of "Yanderism"
After a couple of months, that overwhelming feeling slowly escalates. He couldn't confess what he felt; Whether it was because of how dangerous his job was or the knowledge that many humans or other creatures would try to kill you, it was a thought that sometimes ate his mind and kept him thinking all day, going around and around the same issue.
Both Ciri and other people are worried about him, he denies what he feels or what he thinks, even getting angry because of how difficult it was for him not to be able to get you out of his head.
And it's not until he finally lets his feelings take over that there is no turning back.
(From this point forward, there is no way back)
First murder or Yandere act.
He would kill someone very close to you, not out of self-defense, nor because that person was a danger to you, but at one point, his jealousy took over him completely.
Geralt had a hard time believing it when he did it, since he almost never let himself be carried away by his emotions. But this time, he had screwed up, and he knew that sooner or later you would find out.
Even if he tried to hide it, you end up finding out what he did. You deceived yourself, trying to believe that it was just a lie, or that the situation at that moment led him to defend himself on his behalf or to kill him for something that person had not told you.
But in the end, lies have short legs.
He saw you cry and argue with him, yell at him about why he had done such a thing, and that your dead family member or friend had never done anything to hurt him.
And he was forced to act on impulse.
Relationship or kidnapping
After he confessed, you had already grown afraid or disgusted with him, not because he was a witcher, but because he had harmed someone you loved through a simple act of jealousy.
You reject him, feeling disgusted with his decision; You hoped he would leave you alone, but he couldn't go back, and you knew that the hole in his heart that your abandonment would leave was never going to be filled.
And he does it, he forces you to go with him, even tied up or kicking, he was always going to be able to with you. And no matter who gets in the way, no one could stop him.
Coexistence
In this case, it is not very good. You feel afraid that he will hurt you, or hate for all the damage he did in your life, but he still seems so calm around you.
He would hate hurt you, hate the idea of hurting you and causing any kind of pain that makes you cry. Of course, that is if we talk about the physical sense.
We can say that their punishments are more mental.
He would talk to you about how much he loves you, he would show you with affection and make you feel the body heat of another living being for weeks on end. And then he would become distant, he wouldn't touch you and he would rarely respond to you like you normally do.
The more violent you get with him, the less effect it will have on his way of punishing.
Of course, if you show obedience and affection, the affectionate and loving side of him would always be there, and he would never leave you alone.
In case of kidnapping, where would he take you?
Next to him, everywhere. Unless you have managed to escape from him more than once, which would cause him to make the drastic decision of leaving you locked in a place away from civilization and any kind of help or contact with humans or any damn species.
It would be difficult for someone to manage to snatch you from him, considering everything he is capable of doing in a non-yandere state.
Marriage and family.
In this case, I don't see the possibility of marriage.
I mean, he already sees you as his destined partner and he wants you to be together in this life, and in others to come. However, he is not the least bit interested in marriage.
Regarding Geralt's friends, they know almost nothing about you... It's hard for them to believe that he is capable of something so extreme, but when they see it, they only understand that they must keep a certain distance from him if they don't want to cause problems. .
And, in case it wasn't obvious, your family has no say in anything at this point in history.
↘If possible, children?
It is NOT POSSIBLE.
Now, if we assume that by some fucking magic trick from I don't know where the possibility of having a child with you comes from, I'm sure he would be more than happy to take it.
Reasons to be a Yandere:
-During his entire life he suffered a lot of discrimination from many people, he is used to an almost 100% hostile environment, and having the possibility of being with someone who from minute 0 was kind to him and treated him with respect and affection... is something he wouldn't let go so easily.
-Let's say that it is very difficult for him to develop a feeling of trust with someone, especially when that someone is surrounded by people who constantly remind you that you should not interact with them.
-He is used to killing, (more than anything due to the context of the world in which he lives and how his life was) let's say that someone who already has enough experience taking lives from other living beings can implement those actions in others (not specifically harm you, if not those he may consider dangerous)
Extra data:
-Geralt is sweet to you, and he usually likes to have you in his arms to know that he can protect you from anything.
-He is the type of Yandere who would never force you to have sex, under no circumstances would he allow himself to subject you in such a way.
-I would venture to say that Geralt was irritated by how Jaskier constantly seeks to talk to you, not out of jealousy, but because his presence bothers him.
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I had this character in my head for DAYS to make him headcanons hajdajahdjqi
#yandere#obsessive love#yandere x you#yandere headcanons#poppa thoughs#yandere male#geralt of rivia#yandere geralt#the witcher#yandere the witcher#yandere geralt of rivia
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