#Chaeya headcanons

[jxmey]

another courtesy of tarugai's other post

[kazumist]

THE FIRST TIME HE SAID I LOVE YOU .ᐟ

✩ — includes: dckz x gn!reader. fluff. no cws. wc: 434. please reblog,, it helps me a lot <3 this is a little gift bc i hit 200 followers but i wont be holding a milestone event </3 will write part 2! i just dont know with who yet :(

kaeya — !

he hadn't realized that those three words had actually left his mouth. but he pulls off a cool demeanor to cover up his surprise. the blank stare you gave him just made him smirk and go, "hm? what's wrong?" at you, acting like it was normal (not that it wasn't, honestly). you weren't mad, though—it's just that you didn't expect him to blurt it out so randomly. but of course you wouldn't mind; the joy you feel whenever you hear kaeya say that isn't to be simply put into words. who knew that the cavalry captain could make you feel so many things at the same time?

childe — !

the cheeky smile of childe is something you're used to. but this time, it made you even more flustered. had childe been planning this the whole time? either way the butterflies that dashed into your stomach and the heat rushing to your face made you slap his shoulder lightly, mumbling something that even childe couldn't understand. it amuses him to see you like this; it even makes him proud since he caused your current state right now. "oh? are you saying that i should repeat what i said?" he'd tease, before whispering the exact three words over and over again to your ear—no one could even hear what he said. it's a way of showing that it's for you and only you.

zhongli — !

you were the one who first said it, actually. the immediate cough and handkerchief that went on his face as he tried to hide his embarrassment were something that you couldn't forget. "i- i didn't expect such boldness coming from you," he'd start, slowly gaining his composure again before continuing, "but i love you too." you were both equally embarrassed now. the wholehearted laugh zhongli let out made you blush even more, saying, "that's foul play." in a quiet voice that only zhongli caught.

diluc — !

it was during a simple game of chess. diluc was planning his next move, for it was his turn, and he said those three words as he moved the chess piece before making eye contact with you. the thought of your next move after his completely left your mind, and you stared at him dumbfounded. "are you okay? we can always stop playing if you'd like," he said, attempting to check if you were sick. you shook him off, saying that you were fine as you made your move at the board. the rest of the game, though, you were out of focus, which led to your defeat. that's okay, though; you can challenge diluc another time.

[chkn-kit]

Throwing it out there in the world that Kaeya's flirty demeanor is a part of an elaborate defense mechanism and in this essay I will-

[wntrmelts]

Learning to love someone was tough.

Between keeping up with his duties as a harbinger and keeping his affections a secret, Ajax did not know what was the heavier burden. Getting swallowed up by work and forgetting was easy. Coming back and pretending like he did not see the hurt he had caused was not.

Hidden away in their own little world, his beloved cavalry captain spoke in gentle whispers and lazy smiles. He would nudge his face in the crook of his neck, a loving gesture Ajax did not know how to return.

He hoped that, in another universe, he could dream of titillating banter and stolen kisses where one’s biggest worry was whether the ‘love-me’s or the ‘love-me-not’s rang true.

It felt strange when people said that true love was warm. Perhaps something was wrong with him as he felt himself freezing the longer this went on. As he further approached the core of his affections. His mind told him no, yet he could not help but hold onto that piercing sensation, that feeling, that emotion so unfamiliar to him that it scared him. His frostbitten, barely functioning fingers clutched onto his love, and he accepted that he would shatter upon letting go.

There was something frightening about the mutuality of it all. His brutish hands were machines of war, made to take and destroy, yet he was entrusted with something— no, someone so fragile it left him wondering how someone like him could be enough. It sat with him after every kiss goodbye where he could see the strain in his lover’s eye. It was a growing fear that had become a weight so heavy as it lay upon his chest that he may as well forget how to

breathe.

Breathe in, and breathe out.

Learning to love someone was tough, but Ajax was willing to go through hell if it meant he could love Kaeya.

I think that Childe has a hard time coping with the actual FEELING of love. He was thrown into the abyss at a young age and became a soldier not long after. He recognizes familial love but romantic love is new and scary to him.

~~~

OKAY so this was a short threadfic I had written out for Twitter but I liked it enough to post it here. I also had some headcanons and explanations that I posted shortly after so HERE THEY ARE (copy pasted):

He's never had the chance to learn how to love and be a teenager and the abyss has definitely messed him up. Although he is good at masking, I think he struggles with it internally. (I personally like it most if Childe is aware of his flaws and wishes he was normal)

He knows how he's 'supposed to' express it according to societal standards but I feel like he has a need to express it differently that he logically cannot do.

My man is all about fighting and violence. You can't convince me that this doesn't affect other parts of his psyche.

Kaeya on the other hand HAS experienced love but is unwilling to receive it. He is afraid of getting hurt after getting attached to something again, especially after he has come to terms with the possibility that he will always be alone.

Once you actually get through to that man, I think he gets super clingy but doesn't like to outwardly show it or communicate it. He'll pretend he's okay with being apart, but he's a liar!!!

Kaeya in my head is a self-fulfilling prophecy and has probably (subconsciously) attempted to make people leave him to prove to himself and others that 'he is not worth it' since everyone always leaves him.

So I gotta add that if I ever write Kaeya in a loving relationship ACTUALLY getting broken up with

:)

[sunlight-forsaken]

Gifting gliders is a tradition in Mondstadt- although, mostly for major events/milestones or birthdays. Custom made gliders are a rarity even then- but Kaeya happens to be a little fond of extravagant displays. Childe has no idea how to handle being on the receiving end of gifts- especially something made for him. He loves it very much.

+ the full glider !!

[thr-teenbeaches]

basketbal

[goldfish-afterhours]

Realization Upon Termination

-- aka Diluc hunts down Childe in the mistaken belief he had killed his brother

Characters: Diluc, Childe x Kaeya

Type/genre: Bulleted headcanons, angst(?), comedic at the end i guess

Warnings: Not proof read at all

A/N: This is acc my outline for a fic I was gonna write but I still haven't written it 2 years later so I'm just posting it like this lol

Kaeya doesn’t come to the bar for a long time. Diluc is used to seeing his annoying face everyday, and despite how many times he’s kicked him out, Kaeya always comes back the next day, so Diluc’s given up 

Recently, he had been coming in with his boyfriend, Childe, a Fatui Harbinger deployed to Mondstadt. 

Childe was only in Mondstadt for a short period of time, and every time Childe would visit, Kaeya would seem a little brighter, his laugh would be a little louder

Diluc, of course, hates Childe. Not just because he’s a harbinger—but it’s a reminder that Diluc himself is alone, while Kaeya was able to move on and be happy with his life

Despite all that’s happened, this is when Diluc is jealous of Kaeya. Diluc has his money and family name, but he’s inexplicably tied down to them while Kaeya is free to do whatever he wants. It’s only when he’s roaming the streets at night does Diluc feel free from his chains of being the esteemed Ragnivindr Head. 

Childe and Kaeya visit the bar one night. Kaeya is as easy-going as always, but Childe seems off. He doesn’t drink the alcoholic drinks Kaeya buys him, and seems to be pushing Kaeya to drink more, drink more.

Diluc wants to step in, but he feels odd doing so. He never showed much care to Kaeya before, and it’d seem weird if he did now, so Diluc just watches it happen. 

The next night, however, Kaeya doesn’t come to the Angel’s Share. Diluc thinks that perhaps he’s on a date somewhere else with Childe, when Jean comes in, asking him if he’s seen Kaeya

Diluc says he hasn’t. It turns out Kaeya did not show up for work that day. She went to look for Childe to ask him, but Childe wasn’t in the Goth Hotel. None of the Fatui were giving her any answers either, and were being weirdly defensive about Childe

Rosaria, who was drinking at the counter, mentions seeing Childe just outside of Mondstadt, alone, bow in hand without his gloves when she was heading to the bar. She thought it was weird, but didn’t say anything to him, as he was leaving Mondstadt. However, she tailed him to Whispering Woods, where he just seemed to be going on a leisurely walk, so she left.

Diluc’s first thought is that Childe must have done something to Kaeya. He sets down the glass he was polishing and grabs his claymore. Jean asks him if he’ll need backup, and Diluc refuses, saying this is something for him to do

As a brother? As the Darknight of Mondstadt? He wasn’t sure

The sun was starting to go down. Diluc scored the Whispering Woods but found no sign of the harbinger. It’s only when the stars could be seen in the sky does Diluc find him, wading in Starfell Lake. 

“Ah...so the big brother’s found me.”

“What are you doing?”

“What am I doing? Well, you could say I’m erasing the evidence. You know, water washes away all sorts of things.”

“Where’s Kaeya?” 

“Hah, well…who knows?” 

Diluc takes out his sword. Surprisingly, Childe doesn’t want to fight him, saying he was tired and wasn’t in the mood for a fight for once. 

Diluc lunges at Childe, filled with anger, not only at him but at himself. 

Why is it only after everything is over does Diluc realize what he actually had?

Kaeya was trying to mend his relationship with him, but Diluc was too absorbed in what he had lost that he didn’t realize Kaeya was the only family he had left 

Diluc knocks the harbinger to the ground, water splashing as he falls. 

“Such a protective older brother, aren’t you?”

“You…you bastard…”

“Well, can’t say I blame you. If Tonia ever argues with her boyfriend in the future, I’d want to beat him within an inch of his life as well.”

That’s when Diluc stops, claymore above his head in mid-swing, confused. 

Suddenly, Kaeya appears from the woods, having been sent by Jean and Rosaria after he walked into the Angel’s Share later that night, wanting to be comforted by alcohol 

“Diluc, what are you doing?”

“...avenging your death?” 

Childe laughs, explaining that he was looking for calla lilies and fishing for Kaeya as an “I’m sorry” present 

“You thought he killed me? Really? I may only have one eye, but I certainly don’t have that bad an eye for men.”

“He’s a harbinger. There’s nothing about him I can trust.”

The night ends with Kaeya and Diluc helping Childe back to the cathedral for first-aid (for his hurt feelings)

Diluc and Kaeya’s relationship still feels a little strained, but perhaps Diluc has the Fatui to thank for helping him realize what he still had 

[silkflovvers-art]

COMMISSION for @/jaxofsometrades on Twitter

Thank you again for your support!

Edits and Reposts are Prohibited

[tartagla2]

what color is your love?

Blue; love as peace , How to describe your love? Your love is a cool pool which you can sink into on a hot day. Your love is a reassuring hand squeeze, a whispered "it'll be okay, I'm here". Your love is knowing their favorite gas station snack, their coffee order, their loved and hated songs. Your love is the rain that every plant needs to grow. Your love is compassion and confidence.

tagged by : @glacialswordsman tagging : you

[random-blep]

hi!! wanted to express I very much enjoy and agree with your sex repulsed Kaeya hc (trying to find well-written chaeya centric fics with an interesting dynamic and a foundation other than One Night Stand... they exist but are so hard to find for no reason), and would like to give you a no-pressure excuse/request to talk about it more if there's anything more you'd want to say about it.

if there's not anything to expand on for particular that one, some other headcanon of yours you'd like to talk about, and if there's not any, then I hope you're doing well regardless!!

Thank you very much anon!

I love this excuse to talk about Kaeya more!

Alright so in the context of relationship dynamics with Kaeyas sex repulsion

I think in contexts like Chaeya, I think Kaeya would inherently has a distrust for fatui and especially harbingers seeing as in the past they have caused quite a lot of trouble for him and Mond. So if he met Childe, it would probably be because Childe had been temporarily stationed in Mond.

We all know Kaeya has his charm, it is in a way his manipulation tactic. He seems suave and flirtatious, which can cause somebody's guard to be dropped if they don't know him because he's not making himself be perceived as a threat. Though I believe that is his first trajectory when working. He doesn't like being seen as a piece of meat, but if it makes his job easier, if he can catch somebody off guard then it's better for him. But he also does have his second trajectory where fighting is the solution. He isn't scared to sacrifice others to make sure he gets the results he wants, but he also can play that off as mischievousness and being tricky so that people working under him still want to follow him.

We also know Childe is no stranger to holding a charm as well, he presents himself as a happy guy who could possibly be considered a flirtatious guy (even if when he's actually flirting he's awful at it). From what I know there is two sides of him, the side that wants to perceive as a nonthreat and that's for children, mothers, and possibly people he wishes to manipulate. The other side is the side that wants to be a threat, he craves for bloodlust and battle which can be attributed to the time he spent in the abyss. Childe will use his manipulation tactics of being the nice helpful guy to an extent, but his strengths lay in the battlefield. His strengths are opposite to Kaeya, where Kaeya strengths lay in his silver tongue and is equally good in the battlefield. Childe puts most of his strengths into the battlefield. He would much rather sacrifice those around him and he would rather the people under him listen to him through fear of his strength than by his charm. Though I am certain Childe is one of the few harbingers who are more likely to be more buddy buddy with his underlings than others like Scaramouche or Dottore.

So when these two meet Childe can spot Kaeyas false niceness to him, Kaeya can see the inherent violence in Childe. They don't trust each other in the slightest when they first meet. Childe might think in the beginning from how Kaeya dresses that he's a sexual person and he might even try to flirt (very poorly) cause he thinks it might be easy to get that from Kaeya so he can get a weakness of the captains. But Kaeyas two responses would be to laugh at him or to make a barely disguised face of disgust.

To make a story short the two of them dance around eachother in distrust for a while. Slowly Kaeya actually finds spending time with Childe isn't so bad, but he still doesn't trust him. He's willing to fight Childe at a moments notice, he's ready for disaster at any moment. Childe enjoys Kaeyas company quite a bit as well and finds himself trying to figure out the puzzle that is Kaeya. He's mysterious and the way he speaks and presents himself is so different than the peaks he got of the person he's seen under that mask on occasion. Childe believes Kaeya wouldn't be a challenge to get rid of. At first he doesn't try to because he doesn't wish to ruin his status or be the reason the fatui get kicked from Mond. The more time he spends eithbthe captain though the more he's curious of the person the captain is. Though Childe is most definitely ready to be given the order to get rid of him or is ready to fight him at any given point.

The two of them dance around in a friend-enemy territory for a long while.

The both of them most definitely spar on more friendly terms, but Childe barely holds back his lust for violence and Kaeya barely holds himself back from wanting to actually mortally would the harbinger.

Them eventually getting together would take quite a bit of time and work, and it still would hold the untrust between them because Kaeya and Childe are on different sides. Think of it like those stories like two undercover agents are dating eachother with the other as their target, except they both know of each others statuses but aren't really sure of their mission.

When together Childe would probably try and move things to a sexual nature except Kaeya doesn't want to. He shows a distaste for it and even tells Childe he isn't interested in those activities. Which over time Childe wants to know more about Kaeyas distaste for sex.

Kaeya often tries to switch the topic or he gives vague responses to Childes questions. He doesn't want to discuss why he finds sex to be an activity he doesn't want to do. He doesn't want to have to discuss his thoughts on the matter. Which can cause a bit of a rocky patch because oddly enough Childe isn't forceful or isn't demanding answers like Kaeya thought he would do. The whole relationship confuses Kaeya because he thought in private the harbinger would act like a harbinger, but he doesn't. Oddly he goes about his days so normally. The spark of romance between them isn't a burning passion, it oddly isn't fueled by lust and Kaeya likes it. For the first time he doesn't feel like he has to keep up the mysterious flirt persona he has for his job.

Kaeyas content without sex in their relationship, he finds the romance nice, the nonsexual intimacy nice.

If Kaeya ever wanted to have sex with someone it would have to be a person he trusts and somebody he's really close to. It would have to be a situation where he was absolutely certain that he could tap out at any moment if he decided he couldn't continue. The physical aspect of sex might be nice but I think it's more so the emotional aspect is what he struggles with.

[ch1lde-mora]

sdjfso hello!!! shanna's here to bother you with another request!!! because well we're [peace sign] not doing good up there in the ol' nogging umu but could i maybe get some soft ch//ya hcs with holding hands maybe,,, i want someone to hold my hand (v pls hold my hand qwq ilysm i hope you're doing well)

HII SHANNA!!! Im so sorry ur brain isnt brbrbrbr-ing,, shakes brain i hope you feel better soon!! it looks like u want poly but i’m gonna do both a la carte & poly because the brain is just feeling it rn [hearts x5] (HOLDS UR HAND ILYSM ;V; i’ve been better but still not that bad!!) thank u sm sm shanna~!! xoxo, v (edit 3 months later: ik ur probably out n about and feeling better but i wanted to get this out for you!! ur such a sweet person ty for giving me this req)

(edit, ONE YEAR AND 6 MONTHS LATER: wow i really thought i got this out and i didn’t.. Time to make things right 💪 EXTREMELY SORRY FOR THE DELAY WAAAAAH ;;)

they r in my heart forever i love these two

Poly

Childe’s definitely in the middle of you two when you all hold hands

Swings your hands back and forth and tries to walk faster, but Kaeya won’t let you guys LOL

Hums his fav snezhnayan song if you’re lucky!

Interlocks all of your fingers too

Kaeya is more chill when you guys are all together, content with just lacing fingers and walking (albeit slowly) to wherever you need to go

If childe’s not humming you guys will usually talk quietly amongst yourselves just about common things like the groceries or plans with friends later

He would never tell you, but Childe really enjoys all the simple domestic stuff you guys get to enjoy like this

Kaeya usually rubs the fingers of whoever’s hand he’s holding (in this case, Childe’s) with his thumb as you guys walk and doesn’t comment on it, mention it or expect anyone to mention it at all. It’s just something that he does

When sitting at a table, they will have you in the middle holding hands under said table

It’s really funny trying to eat/drink this way 

Because when they try to let go to actually eat you might look at them with those pleading puppy eyes just screaming “don’t let go 🥺” 

Either you’re serious about this whole hand holding thing or you’re just being a sly bitch to make this experience a whole lot more hilarious but regardless, they don’t let go and resign to eating with one hand

It’s not practical at all and I don’t see it happening very often but when you want attention, who are they to deny?

Bonus: if you’re holding both of their hands, they will feed you with their free hands 

“Need a little help? Do you perhaps have your hands full?”

(lmk if you want a one-shot format in the future because this was so fun to write)

Childe

Holds your hand anytime he cannot hold your waist, which is often

He’s always trying for some sort of physical contact, whether that be an arm over the shoulder, around the waist, yet if those are unachievable he opts to go hand in hand with you down the street

He holds your hand shopping, he holds your hand if you guys are driving and at a red light, he holds your hand up elevators or just up STAIRS IN GENERAL?

Always rationalizing his thoughts with  “What if they fall. I should keep them from falling. I should hold their hand” when in reality he just wants to be close to you

Usually holds your hand with your fingers interlaced

If you reach out to hold hands first his cheeks might go a little rosy if he wasn’t expecting it

When in an open field like a park or clearing in a forest, he will sometimes take both of your hands and just spin you and him around like he used to do with his siblings in the snow

Sometimes if it’s really hot and you guys can’t cuddle in bed, he’ll just hold your hand instead

“Don’t you always want to hold and touch things that you love? I know I do.”

Kaeya

I see Kaeya as more of a person that wants a little bit more personal space when out and about, but he wouldn’t object if you initiated first

In private he would hold your hand shamelessly, but prefers to link arms if possible

I think he would charm you and ask if you wanted to hold his hand then be surprised when you actually did it

He’s held hands tons of times before (duh) but he feels like it’s more special when it’s with the one that he loves

There’s also that feeling of doing something so simple and “first-base” with someone you love that puts butterflies in your stomach when you do it for the first time in awhile

That’s what he feels like when he feels your hand in his

Doesn’t interlace his fingers but rather just grips your hand with a firm but not too tight hold

Because of his fingerless gloves and the spikes on the wrists of them, he gets a little bit scared they might poke you

Of course, the ever confident Kaeya keeps that to himself and says nothing about it, and it literally doesn’t end up ever being an issue

If you rub his hand with your thumb, he notices and fixates on it but doesn’t mention it, thinking about it for the rest of the day when he has to eventually depart for his work

“Hm.. Perhaps we should do this more often. What do you think?”

[lavenderloverrr]

!!!! Thank you for putting such thought into this it's amazing! I scream every time I re-read this, I just-- kinda-- forgot to reblog and respond in the emotional rollcoaster you sent me on xD

i would really appreciate some xiaoyu and chaeya headcanons if you don't mind sharing, cuz your art got me on the chaeya boat and now you gotta feed me. (but like only if you want cuz ur busy and have a life but i love ur art and ur opinions matter and just wanna let you know you valid and ur so talented and only 21?? like 0_o

OMG this ask is so sweet i have been marinating on it for a while because while i DO have headcanons........ i had to think abt the best ones to share 😳 i put way too much thought into this lol

CHAEYA

-my favorite possible dynamic for them is that they are both trying to convince themselves that what they have going on is JUST casual because if either of them really admitted how strongly they felt for each other their entire world would ACTUALLY explode.

-i REALLY want them to meet at a tavern or out exploring by happenstance a good couple of times before being introduced professionally. kaeya absolutely knew he was talking to a harbinger. childe was utterly enamored by a mysterious stranger. UNTIL BOOM HE MEETS HIM IN A MEETING WITH THE KNIGHTS OF FAVONIOUS?!!?

-i need them to be messy and angsty and absolutely toxic with each other but eventually they become husbands and have a weird little family dynamic with klee and teucer 🥰 they need to work through shit together like its gotta be a mess before it can like become something great. but it'll become something great.

-whenever im playing genshin and in a chaeya mood i put on a kaeya/childe/jean/diluc team because i think it would be possibly the most awkward adventuring team in the world. kaeya's boss and kaeya's brother hanging out with the crazy dude he's boning? absolutely hilarious.

-oh my god i need them to have the most romantic love letters man. i need them to have beautiful letters filled with longing and vulnerability and so SO SO MUCH love, but when they finally meet again it's a little awkward and they have a hard time communicating. it's easier in writing!

-speaking of awkward. at first they are very flirty and lovey but none of it is genuine feelings just attraction. when they REALLY start liking each other oh my god they have to be so awkward about it. no eye contact. barely make normal conversation. they are like awkward teenagers oh my GOD I AM SHAKING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE DYNAMIC I NEED FOR THEM. CASUAL > AWKARD > TERRIBLE ANGST AND TRAGEDY > REBIRTH AS SOUL MATES

XIAOYU

-xiaoyu for me is all about shared healing, patience, and finally finding someone to connect with. oh my god BOTH of these guys have been through SO, SO MUCH and i just think both of them could gain a sense of real, genuine love from one another.

-both of these guys have been conditioned to feel isolated from the world. ganyu feels so different from everyone around her, never truly connecting with the adepti or with the humans. even in the bustling streets of liyue she's alone. xiao has lost everyone he's ever cared for, and since then he's never allowed himself to get close to anyone. he feels undeserving of another person's affections. he feels as though he's the only one of carrying such burdens. i think the two of them could really resonate with each other, and maybe find some solace knowing they aren't truly alone.

-i really like the idea of ganyu being xiao's first real crush. he doesn't really understand those feelings and not only does it embarrass him it's confusing and FRUSTRATING at the same time. ganyu on the other hand has absolutely been crushing on xiao for a loooong time now, but she hasn't processed that completely, instead believing that she just really wants to befriend him. she thinks about him all the time because she just cares THAT much is all!!!

- they are PINING. they are the slowest of slow burns. they are agonizingly slow. like they will get together in maybe 50-200 years or so. not even kidding.

-i love the idea of xiao checking on ganyu when she's not looking. he's always a little worried for her. sometimes she'll fall asleep in weird places, or travel somewhere far, and xiao just wants to make sure she's home safe. its creepy but he seriously lacks social etiquette and he loves her!

-ganyu isn't a naturally very physically affectionate person since she's so timid, but with xiao she makes sure to be a little more open with her outward affection. a lot of the time she's comforting xiao with a hand on the shoulder or a sweet and quick hand squeeze. she wants him to know she doesn't think he's a monster, and that she feels safe around him. he could probably never verbalize this out loud, but those little touches mean A LOT TO HIM.

-ganyu visits wangshu inn often and brings little care packages for xiao. he's no the best at self care so she does what she can to help! even though she's so busy with work she's been trying to take weekends off every once in a while and stay at the inn with xiao. y'know to make sure he's taking proper care of himself and all 👀

[ccaptain]

Bit of a vent moment that melts in me eventually gushing the friends I made over here and that I have:

The short tl;dr is that in these months I fell prey to the old habit of my mental illness, hyperfocused on a situation that made me feel small and uninteresting, and the willingness to be interesting got so bad that I developed essentially a tunnel vision in mass-producing headcanons for my H:SR Kaeya in a way that sucked the fun out of everything I did and essentially gutted the characterization that I liked so much. There are no villains in this except my own mental illness, which sucks big time, and has made me sink back into the ''I'm overbearing and I'll stop messaging them after tot messages'' mentality. It sucks, I was doing well, all that sad jazz.

I want to remark this: avoid making part of your characterization palatable for specific people- unless their interest for this has been VERY active and they have specifically told you that they are interested in these parts and in joining you, multiple times. If you catch yourself doing that with a lack of matching energy, backpedal as fast as possible. Make them into something you're more comfortable with. Like when your play-doh creation sucks so you squish it and remake it into something you know better.

Addictionally, an important bit: stop making excuses for people's lack of interest. Your comfort and importance shouldn't be based in who or who doesn't pay attention to what you do. Sometimes it's not malicious, sometimes it is. Put some distance between yourself and what makes you feel that way, and whoever is interested will reach out when they can and if they want to. If not, keep going without them if necessary. It will feel like it's the end of the world, and then it won't. You'll be fine.

Thankfully the people I talk most to on Discord have been made aware of the situation and reality checked me in the facehelped me deal with it in an healthy way, and essentially dragged me in the ''none of that. give me your H:SR Kaeya to rp/ship with'' kind of good hell, with an almost unhealthy amount of interest towards eachother at any given times. I have become comfortable again into leaving headcanons in their DMs again like a little mouse dropping cheese crumbs, and in sending more than two messages before the anxiety of being overbearing gets to me. This means a LOT as it probably feels natural to engage with since it's the essence of how people interact with eachother, but it means a lot to me. If possible I would sit on your nightstand like a little grateful squish-to-activate light.

Also a special shoutout to @predvestnik which I have bullied into making an H:SR AU for their Childe so we could have Chaeya in this verse too, and that I am currently bullying into ArgentiHill hell. C:

[ajxrn-archive]

ANYWAYS FOR THE SHIPS ASK. Diluc or Eula >:3

okokok >:3

•Diluc

Ship: I mainly ship Zhongluc!! They are my sillies. Tho I am very big on Chiluc too (I prefer chaeya but I love my toxic yaoi.) Im not too big on Jeanluc but I do headcanon they had cute awkward crushes as teens lmaoaoao

Sexuality headcanon: Gay, he recently found out.

•Eula

Ship: Eulamber my sillies!!!! I fucking love them sm. Tho a friend told me about Eula/Rosaria and I can see the appeal omg,,

Sexuality hc: lesbian! Though she is mostly closeted except for a few friends because of her family.

[glacialswordsman-a]

hello jamey this is your daily reminder from your local shooting star enthusiast that you're amazing and super cool && i think the way you write kaeya is brilliant. i love all your headcanons and thoughts && also thank you for screaming about chaeya with me the brainrot is real . that is all

HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU ASTER OMG......... IM GONNA CRY, THANK YOU SO MUCH!?!?! I LOVE ALL YOUR HEADCANONS & THOUGHTS!!! I AM ALWAYS HAPPY TO SCREAM ABOUT CHAEYA, U KNOW THIS!!! THEY LIVE IN MY BRAIN RENT FREE EVERY FUCKING DAY AND TAKE UP MY WHOLE HEART!!!!!!

[thr-teenbeaches]

‼️‼️ body horror ‼️‼️ foul legacy headcanon and chaeya headcanons