#Catch me having feelings about community in 2020

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Wellness surveillance makes workers unwell

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in TORONTO on Mar 22, then with LAURA POITRAS in NYC on Mar 24, then Anaheim, and more!

"National conversation" sounds like one of those meaningless buzzphrases – until you live through one. The first one I really participated in actively was the national conversation – the global conversation – about privacy following the Snowden revelations.

This all went down when my daughter was five, and as my wife and I talked about the news, our kid naturally grew curious about it. I had to literally "explain like I'm five" global mass surveillance:

https://locusmag.com/2014/05/cory-doctorow-how-to-talk-to-your-children-about-mass-surveillance/

But parenting is a two-way street, so even as I was explaining surveillance to my kid, my own experiences raising a child changed how I thought about surveillance. Obviously I knew about many of the harms that surveillance brings, but parenting helped me viscerally appreciate one of the least-discussed, most important aspects of being watched: how it compromises being your authentic self:

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/blog/2014/may/09/cybersecurity-begins-with-integrity-not-surveillance

As I wrote then:

There are times when she is working right at the limits of her abilities – drawing or dancing or writing or singing or building – and she catches me watching her and gets this look of mingled embarrassment and exasperation, and then she changes back to some task where she has more mastery. No one – not even a small child – likes to look foolish in front of other people.

Learning, growth, and fulfillment all require a zone of privacy, a time and place where we are not observed. Far from making us accountable, continuous, fine-grained surveillance by authority figures just scares us into living a cramped, inauthentic version of ourselves, where growth is all but impossible. Others have observed the role this plays in right-wing culture war bullshit: "an armed society is a polite society" is code for "people who make me feel uncomfortable just by existing should be terrorized into hiding their authentic selves from me." The point of Don't Say Gay laws and anti-trans bills isn't to eliminate gender nonconformity – it's to drive it into hiding.

Given all this, it's no surprise that workers who face workplace surveillance in the name of "wellness" feel unwell as a result:

https://www.ifow.org/publications/what-impact-does-exposure-to-workplace-technologies-have-on-workers-quality-of-life-briefing-paper

As the Future of Work Institute found in its study, some technologies – systems that make it easier to collaborate and communicate with colleagues – increase workers' sense of wellbeing. But wearables and AI tools make workers feel significantly worse:

https://assets-global.website-files.com/64d5f73a7fc5e8a240310c4d/65eef23e188fb988d1f19e58_Tech%20Exposure%20and%20Worker%20Wellbeing%20-%20Full%20WP%20-%20Final.pdf

Workers who reported these negative feelings confirmed that these tools make them feel "monitored." I mean, of course they do. Even where these tools are nominally designed to help you do your job better, they're also explicitly designed to help your boss keep track of you from moment to moment. As Brandon Vigliarolo writes for The Register, these are the same bosses who have been boasting to their investors about their plans to fire their workers and replace them with AI:

https://www.theregister.com/2024/03/14/advanced_workplace_tech_study/

"Bossware" is a key example of the shitty rainbow of "disciplinary technology," tools that exist to take away human agency by making it easier to surveil and control its users:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/01/bossware/#bossware

Bossware is one of the stages of the Shitty Technology Adoption Curve: the process by which abusive and immiserating technologies progress up the privilege gradient as their proponents refine and normalize dystopian technologies in order to impose them on wider and wider audiences:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/02/24/gwb-rumsfeld-monsters/#bossware

The kinds of metrics that bossware gathers might be useful to workers, but only if the workers get to decide when, whether and how to share that data with other people. Microsoft Office helps you catch typos by underlining words its dictionary doesn't recognize; the cloud-based, "AI-powered" Office365 tells your boss that you're the 11th-worst speller in your division and uses "sentiment analysis" to predict whether you are likely to cause trouble:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/21/great-taylors-ghost/#solidarity-or-bust

Two hundred years ago, Luddites rose up against machines. Contrary to the ahistorical libel you've heard, the Luddites weren't angry or frightened of machines – they were angry at the machines' owners. They understood – correctly – that the purpose of a machine "so easy a child could use it" was to fire skilled adult workers and replace them with kidnapped, indentured Napoleonic War orphans who could be maimed and killed on the job without consequence:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/03/12/gig-work-is-the-opposite-of-steampunk/

A hundred years ago, the "Taylorites" picked up where those mill owners left off: choreographing workers' movements to the finest degree in a pseudoscientific effort to produce a kind of kabuki of boss-pleasing robotic efficiency. The new, AI-based Taylorism goes even further, allowing bosses to automatically blacklist gig workers who refuse to cross picket-lines, monitor "self-employed" call center operators in their own homes, and monitor the eyeballs of Amazon drivers:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/12/algorithmic-wage-discrimination/#fishers-of-men

AI-based monitoring technologies dock workers' wages, suspend them, and even fire them, and when workers object, they're stuck arguing with a chatbot that is the apotheosis of Computer Says No:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/11/robots-stole-my-jerb/#computer-says-no

There's plenty of research about AI successfully "augmenting" workers, making them more productive and I'm the last person to say that automation can't help you get more done:

https://www.ibm.com/thought-leadership/institute-business-value/en-us/report/augmented-workforce

But without understanding how AI augments class warfare – disciplining workers with a scale, speed and granularity beyond the sadistic fantasies of even the most micromanaging asshole boss – this research is meaningless.

The irony of bosses imposing monitoring to improve "wellness" and stave off "burnout" is that nothing is more exhausting, more immiserating, more infuriating than being continuously watched and judged.

Name your price for 18 of my DRM-free ebooks and support the Electronic Frontier Foundation with the Humble Cory Doctorow Bundle.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/15/wellness-taylorism/#sick-of-spying

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[adventuringblind]

Drive With You Forever

Chapter Five: Cats, Cluelessness, and difficult communication

Max Verstappen x Reader x Charles Leclerc x Lando Norris

Chapter Summary: a brief interlude in the off-season before 2020, Sebastian adopts Charles, Max struggles to communicate his feelings, and the reader makes a new friend 👀

Warnings: mentions of SH, reader over does it again, seizure like episode, Lando is awkward, Charles is awkward, Max can't do feeling well yet, jos verstappen

Notes: ah yes, the gang is all here now. I have more action coming in the next part. Maybe also some fluffy stuff. I've been trying to get some blurbs done for what isn't shown in the long chapters because I've had to cut down on some things. I would love to give y'all some content of our duo, trio, or quartet doing something specific.

Previous <-

Masterlist

The end of the season means a bit of a break for the drivers. A chance to spend some time with their families. For her, it means spending time with Sebastian and Hanna in Germany.

The trio had wanted to officially introduce themselves. They knew, but the three barely got a chance to interact all together. It would be nice to catch up anyways.

They are all sat at the dining room table. Even the littles wanted to join in on the conversation. Mostly they spout of randomness as they listen but it’s still endearing to everyone.

The three are sat in a row. Charles far left, the female in the middle and Max on the right if her.

“So I’m curious, who gets the middle of the bed?” Seb laughs at his own question. Hanna playfully hits his shoulder. Charles and Max both look at her. She just rolls her eyes as they both start laughing.

“Are you three moving in together?” Hanna asks this time. Genuine curiosity, unlike her husband.

Charles almost chokes. He hadn’t thought about it.

He’s thankful he’s not the first to answer. “Are you saying you want me out?” It’s a playful question from the girl. She’s smiling like an idiot at the banter.

“Of course not. You’re welcome here forever.”

Max swallows his food then joins the conversation. “We were actually planning on moving some things to my apartment since we’re here.” Now Charles feels out of place. Was he not asked yet for a reason? They hadn’t been together long so it would make sense. “Charles lives in Monaco already so I figured his things would be easier to move.” Max explains.

Now he’s confused. Something Max can clearly see. They make eye contact for a moment and Charles is left a mess. “Unless you don’t want to anymore?”

Charles is shaking his head no at lightning speed. He definitely wants to. He’s tired of living alone and throwing himself pity parties over breaks. Plus, he learns he sleeps better when he's not alone.

~

Moving feels more sentimental to her this time. She had more stuff than when she was fifteen.

Sbeastion offered to let them fly private with him to help move her stuff to Monaco. She wanted to, but it was unnecessary. Most of her belongings that she needs fits into an extra suitcase.

Max and Charles both kept asking her if she had anything else. It was getting on her nerves a bit.

Hanna and Seb had done the same thing when she first came to Germay. Though she had less then. Hanna had taken her to get some new clothes because her t-shirts all had holes in them.

Flights were weird. The first class has two seats for each row, meaning that one of them got to sit somewhere else. They often played musical chairs on the plane because of this.

She'd always had an affinity for even numbers.

It was an interesting dynamic they had created. Charles and Max are barely a month apart, and she's just turned nineteen. They get to do things she can't yet. But she's gentle and knows exactly what they need and is far to gentle for what she's been through.

Charles felt that he was playing catch up with the other two. He was new to this and still new to them. He, however, was the best at communication between the three.

Max, having grown up in an interesting family setting, is aggressive and protective. His communication skills are lacking, but he would do anything to keep his significant others out of harms way.

Today was one of those days that Max was struggling communication wise. It had started after an intense phone call where the other two were attempting (and failing) at deciphering dutch.

She'd offered to sit next to him if he needed consoling, but he decided to sit further away from the two. Leaving them to figure out what happened.

This had brought the thoughts of even numbers. If they were flying with four of them, Max wouldn't be able to mope alone.

"Do you think it was Jos?" Charles asked. His eyes had been on the Dutch for most of the flight.

"I would assume so given that he was speaking Dutch, and he doesn't do that with many people."

Both sigh. Jos had been on Max's ass about moving up into a championship title. Che was ready to have some words, either him, next time they were together, and Charles was going to start making a point to celebrate every placement in a race.

It didn't take long to get to Max's apartment. It's not the most luxurious, but it's comfortable. He's planning to get something worthy of the three of them after he gets a title.

Max had successfully locked himself away in his bedroom. The other two left to figure out what he needs. Maybe it is just a time thing?

"Is he usually like this after a call with Jos?"

She shrugs her shoulders. "It depends on if he's praising or berating."

"Can we help him?" Charles is eyeing the closed door and her. His brain working out every way to get him to open up.

She smirks. There always one thing that cheered up Max.

~

Max was choking back tears. He felt weak. Like he was never going to he enough.

He felt bad for stomping off the way he did, but he didn't want his partners to see him like this.

He hears the soft rape of knuckles against the door. "Mon Amour? Can we please come in?"

He grunts, but the Monegasque takes it as approval.

Charles peeks his head in. His gentle steps are coming closer to Max. He doesn't look up. He just keeps his head buried in his pillow.

Charles doesn't say anything, which he appreciates. Just sits down on the edge and lets Max's body dip towards his. Then he's running his fingers through Max's hair.

It's not long before another set of footsteps are padding into the room. These ones softer then Charles, telling Max it's y/n.

She's successfully moved both Jimmy and Sassy into the room from their hiding spots and is holding his favorite movie. She sneaks in and closes the door behind her.

They spend the next couple of hours lying in bed with the cats and watching their movie.

Max feels himself calming down. They don't talk about anything. Aside from occasionally copying the lines from the movie they've watched far to many time.

It's after that he feels like he can say something. His mind finally grounded back to reality. "I'm sorry for shutting you both out. I was just... agitated, I guess."

The Monegasque has his fingers back in his hair in an instant. "It's okay, you needed space. Do you want to talk about it now?"

The youngest places sassy on his chest as a way to comfort him. Her hands intertwine with his.

"Just frustrated that my dad thinks I'm not trying. He started spouting that I'll never get anywhere at this rate."

"That a lie. Jos is obviously lacking brain cells." The youngest pipes. "I can throw him into a wall if you want?"

The idea actually makes him smile.

~

Charles was the next to move things in. Though it was mildly awkward explaining to his family why he was moving somewhere else.

Turns out he can't keep a secret. His family is accepting. Pascale welcomes both into her home. She takes a particular liking to the quiet girl who is still always between the two older boys.

His stuff takes up more of the apartment than hers. The contrast of red and blue is now showing everywhere.

"If Charles is red, Max is blue, and I'm always in the middle, does that make me purple?" She spouts while unpacking a box of ferrari shirts.

Max spits out the water he was drinking. Charles starts wheezing. And she is laughing at her own comment.

"Where did you come up with that, Chéri?"

"Just a thought I've been sitting on since we started dating."

"You're not wrong, though." Max is wiping his mouth clean from the water.

~

It's weird going places together. Not errands and things, but social gatherings. Charles has asked to keep things private for now. He's not fond of the questions people have about the nuances of their relationship.

They came and left separately. Usually, depending on who wanted to leave first, the other would wait about fifteen minutes.

A few months into the break, Lando Norris decides to call Max and invite him and his lover to a party. He does the same for Charles a minute after he hangs up with Max.

The three of you have to hold in your laughter as Charles tries to get through the phone call listening to the same details.

Despite what Lando said, this was not the type of party any of you are used to by now. At least not Charles and Max. She'd been to few and got overwhelmed by it all pretty quickly. Sometimes, she'd use it as an excuse to get the boys out of the apartment so she could have the cats to herself and play around with her powers.

Charles and Max both hate it when she does it alone. They've found her on the floor passed out on multiple occasions. She doesn't care, though. The visions and nightmares of her father were more reason to keep going.

Regardless, this party is small. Just a few drivers who had been in town or live in Monaco are here with their partners.

Kika and Pierre, George and Carmen, Alex and Lily, Carlos is here along with Daniel. Charles is seated in a solitary chair. The couches have been taken. Daniel and Lando on either side of him.

It feels nice and intimate in a way. She hadn't seen many drivers just get together to hang out like this.

Charles is ever the gentleman and offers her the chair, which she takes. Him and Max are now making themselves comfortable on the floor in front of her.

They're eating, drinking, laughing, and sharing stories from the past. It's nice and relaxing.

She taps Max's shoulder, alerting him that she's going for water and asking both boys if they need anything to which they reply no.

She spots Lando in his kitchen getting a drink. It's not an alcoholic one, just juice that looks like it could be alcohol.

She turns on his tap for water, and Lando jumps out of his skin. His eyes rapidly look between her and his cup.

"I like to mix my alcohol with juice...?" His voice sounds unsure. Does he think it's not okay to just have juice?

"Juice is a good choice, in my opinion. Alcohol is strong and feels funny sometimes."

Lando visibly relaxs. "Promise you won't tell anyone? They laugh at me sometimes when I do this."

"I promise."

~

Lando was around more after the party. He seemed comfortable around her and Max. He'd opened up about his anxiety to them and played far to many games with Max.

What they were not expecting was for Lando to show up at their apartment door at three o'clock in the morning. His breathing uneven body shaking like a leaf.

She knew what this was. She'd had plenty of panic attacks.

She guides him inside to the couch and is trying to asses the situation. Get his breathing to calm down so he doesn't hyperventilate.

It takes ten minutes until he's calm.

"Did something happen?"

"Just a nightmare, and I couldn't calm down after."

"Did you walk here?"

He nods his head yes. Exhaustion flooding his eyes.

"Is Max asleep?" He asks.

"Should be. He sleeps like a rock most of the time." They both giggle. Lando is now able to relax in a calm environment.

They are interrupted by two sets of footsteps. Charles and Max come barreling into the living room. Panic on their faces one minute and embarrassment the next. Lando staring at the with the utmost confusion.

The older boys are shirtless and in sweats. Max's arm protectively outstretched in front of Charles.

"...oops."

~

Lando is not stupid. He may be the youngest on the grid currently, but he's not stupid.

He saw how the three of them looked at each other. Charles definitely touched them both far more than what friends do.

Originally, he thought he was crazy for watching them. Yet he couldn't help but be intrigued. How they all interacted. How they just flowed together.

Now he sits on their couch. Max looks like he's guarding Charles and y/n. The Dutch has yet to sit down and is leaning against the wall. Charles is sitting across from him with the females head in this lap. His fingers running through her hair.

It's a terrible feeling. Like he's left out of whatever this is. Three of his best friends spend all their time together, and he's just here. Young and naïve Lando.

"Did you have a feeling this would happen, Mijn liefje?" Asks Max from his perch on the wall. She shakes her head no in response.

Lando had heard about her knack for predicting future outcomes. He'd heard rumors about magic and tarot cards, but she'd never said anything to him.

"Well, you're welcome to stay here in the extra bedroom, and I can't take you home in the morning."

"That sounds nice, thank you."

~

She woke up exhausted. She felt guilty for not having warned Max and Charles. Her mind to far gone that they were mad at her. She spent her night trying to get any glimpse of their future but didn't get anything useful.

She hid herself away in the master bathroom. The wet towel and the floor her new best friend.

She could smell breakfeast. Max is cooking for all of them. They learned quickly not to let Charles cook. Lest they all die.

She was in bed with them this morning. Only crawling out from their hold when she felt them stir.

Every question puts her further into the fog. Was she going to lose them? Are they upset with her? Is Lando okay with them? Would he tell people?

It's too much for her head.

She goes for another attempt. She knows she's overdoing it. The further she goes with less time in-between brings her closer to the edge of her body going numb.

Nausea creeps into her stomach, but she sees them. Further down the line. Happy and four.

Four? This could be shocking, and yet somehow, she already knew. Her mind just needs a but of confirmation that it's possible.

The nausea gets stronger. Her nose is bleeding heavily. She pushed it past the limit.

They won't mind, though.

~

Max is making breakfast and quietly humming to himself. Charles has his hands on his hips, the two of them swaying back and forth to the tune.

"Do you think I should go check on her?" Charles mumbles into his shoulder.

"She may want space after last night, she was taken off guard and might need to peocess." He explains, then turns his attention back to the pan.

"I'm worried, though. She was crying last night after Lando went to bed, and I don't think she slept."

Lando slides around the corner. His face lighting up at the smell of food. "Can I... can I have some?"

Max laughs at the Brit's excitment. "Of course. I made enough for all of us."

Lando sits himself on top on the counter. Watching the Dutch and Monegasque lean into each other. He takes notice that someone is missing. "Is y/n okay?"

Both boys sigh with heavy concern. "She had a rough night." Explains Charles. His body is fighting the urge to go get her. "I can't take it anymore, I'm going to check on her."

Charles leaves Max and Lando in the kitchen. His legs taking long strides back to the bedroom.

"So you guys all sleep together? Not like sexually- I guess - I mean at night to sleep."

Max smiles at the Brit. His curiosity was nothing he didn't expect. "Yeah, we pile into the same bed at night. All of us sleep better that way."

Lando hums. His palm rubs his face with anxiety. "Would you ever add a fourth?-'m asking for a friend..."

Max already knows. Somehow, someway, he already knows where this is going. "Depends. It took months of discussion before Charles joined us. But I'm sure if the right person came along, we'd be open to it." Max turns around to face Lando and shoots him a reassuring smile.

Lando's cheek tint pink, and Max knows exactly what he wants.

~

Charles leclerc is usually someone who panics. This time was no exception.

He'd seen plenty after his six months of being together with his partners. Particularly how the femal among them is prone to violent behaviors against herself. He's seen all of her powers now and how they affect her if she uses them too much. He's been there to help soothe her after night terrors while Max fetches her water.

He was glad she opened up to him about her past more. He knew the generally what had gone on but no details, nothing like what he knew now.

The prospect of her father coming back for her at some point is what drover her to the breaking point on most days.

Now, Charles is faced with a locked door and the sounds of thrashing from the other side. He'd tried picking the lock, something him and Max both learned to do after instances like this, but his hands are far too shaky to maneuver the pins.

So he does the only other logical thing and breaks the door down. Only enough that he can lean it somewhere and not let it fall on her, but it felt cool to kick it in.

Charles has seen a lot of things, but this is completely new. Her muscles are tensing at a rapid speed, and her eyes are rolled back into her head. Her breathing movements are unatrual.

"Max!"

It takes ten seconds, and he's there. His body and mind reacting to the situation. He's trying to hold her in his arms. Attempting to wake her up from whatever trance she's in.

Max hisses through his teeth when he touches her. Her skin in his searing his hands. Yet, he pushes through.

Charles feels helpless. "What can I do?"

"This has happened before. She must have forced a vision. She'll come out of it, we just need to make sure she dosen't die in the process."

The two boys are then lifting her body of the floor. Charles now carries her to the bed while Max runs around grabbing things. Mostly ice to cool her down. Charles rambles on to her about nothing and everything. Max said they should talk to her, giver her some to help bring her back.

Both of them forgot they left Lando in the kitchen. The Brit left to finish making breakfast in light of their emergency. Again, they are shocked to see his pale face watching the scene unfold before him.

"Can I help?" Is all he can manage.

"Do you want to trade places with me? I think the liquid benadryl might help."

Lando is taking over for Max tentatively. He takes the ice pack from the Dutch and places it on her forehead.

Lando can see the sweat and tears mixed with fresh blood. It's scary, and he's nervous. Why are they not taking her to a hospital?

Normally, she's the one calming him down. She always knows exactly what he needs to hear. He's not been in this position, and it scares him to see her like this.

He slides one hand down to her bicep. His fingers tap out the melody to her favorite song. A trick she used on him to bring him back to earth when he got in his head.

About halfway through, she's sucking in a breath, her body sitting straight upwards. Her eyes are no longer stuck to the inside of her head. She's still sweating like mad, and her body is twitching, but she's awake.

She's breathing heavily. Dry heaving and coughing into herself. Her hands are quick to find Charles and grasp at him, searching for the familiar comfort.

Lando watches her intently. Her sobs are painful. They sound broken, like whatever she's just been through was some sort of of torcher.

"Chéri, can I set you with Lando for a moment? I need to tell Max you're awake." Charles whispers gently. Lando takes note of how he's cradling her. His hands on the back of her head and under her legs to support her weight.

She barely nods her approval. Her body is slid close to Lando, who embraces her. Attempting to replicate what Charles was doing. He finds himself tapping the same melody on her knees.

"Was that you tapping? When I was asleep?" She chokes.

"Yeah, could you feel it."

She nods her head against his body. "You brought me back, thank you."

Lando lets his body relax into hers, knowing he at least did one thing right today.

~

Next ->

Tags: @styles-sunflower @purplephantomwolf @boiohboii @reblog-princess-blog @jjsprobablywrong @ipabloramos @jayda12 @faithm120601

(comment if you want to be added)

[unavailableapple]

Excuse me for coming to your askbox, I am not a radfem and don't agree with a lot of it's principles, yet I find radfem spaces are the only place where discussion of nonbinary identity has any nuance. Personally I have no problem with people doing whatever they want with their own bodies/minds/labels but I did struggle to wrap my head around just how many people started IDing as nonbinary during the last few years. Now recently it's been a bit of the opposite, with a noticeable amount of previously out and proud nonbinary people dropping the label. I've heard some people discuss it like it was just "in fashion" for a while, while others insist it's a result of gender experimentation or having to go back in the closet due to the political climate. But it's not just the young, I noticed that includes some of the first nb people I knew, who were nonbinary before 2020, hell, before 2015. I know you had a similar experience, so I just wanted to hear your opinion on this whole phenomenon, why it's happening and why now, and if you expect the trend to continue?

So I’ve been thinking about this a lot and honestly the short answer is: I’m not sure.

The long answer:

I think that these things come in waves. Think about BBL surgery (Brazilian butt-lift surgery). When that surgery was really popular, I’m sure it felt like a very real need to the women who got it. Similarly, my nonbinary identity felt very real to me. But once you apply any amount of pressure to either of these, they start to break. Because really what does it mean to be nonbinary? Why do I NEED to express myself as nonbinary? Why does she NEED to have a large posterior? Eventually you realize, it is misogyny. That’s all it is. And then the whole thing falls apart…Aside from that, even if you don’t acknowledge the misogyny, these things are ultimately superficial and, as such, fall away once one reaches a certain point of adulthood.

I don’t mean adulthood as in becoming an adult human I mean adulthood as in a certain level of struggle that makes fanciful discussions of pronouns seem taxing. Eventually real life catches up and you don’t feel like wasting your precious free time thinking about whether you use they, she, he, or meow pronouns. I think the lasting effects of COVID have meant terrible things for the general public and a lot of people are struggling to pay rent or afford food. I know that what first made me stop caring about pronouns was when I was homeless and thought a lot more about finding a safe place to sleep than making sure everyone calls me he/meow/it pronouns.

Then I think there’s the climate of the trans community right now. When I was younger, there was an idea of, “Being trans is equally hard for males AND females”. But now the dominant narrative seems to be that trans identified males have it a thousand times harder being trans and trans identified females face no oppression at all. I do think this drives more trans identified females out of trans spaces and leads them to find more community with other women. This was the case for several of my friends. Once the trans community told them, “You don’t face any oppression” even though they did (by right of being female), they stopped feeling aligned with a nonbinary identity and suddenly realized they felt more aligned with being female, on the basis of shared experiences.

Finally, it could genuinely just be that it’s falling out of fashion. I’m of an era where I, like a lot of young women my age, was the froggy jumper round glasses meow/it pronoun using boyflux aligned aroace nonbinary person and that was in style. Nowadays kids on TikTok make fun of that and it’s much less “in”. Recently Mitski cut her hair short and people started calling her “theyfab”. For the uninitiated, theyfab is a rude term the trans community uses for a female person who identifies as nonbinary, especially if she doesn’t do anything to express this nonbinary identity beyond cutting her hair. They were not trying to “affirm” Mitski, they were making fun of her for being a gender nonconforming woman, and they were making fun of the women who identify as nonbinary. No matter what, it’s always “in” to make fun of women so if a lot of women are identifying as nonbinary, it’s going to be “in” to make fun of them and it is. On pinterest, Nonbinary identities are already being relegated to “2010s nostalgia” the way moustache tattoos on pointer fingers are “2000s nostalgia”, these things come and go.

So yeah, I ultimately don’t know, and these are only a couple among my many many MANY different theories. But based on my own experience and the experiences of people I know, this is what I’ve been thinking.

[jariten]

Roundup-catch up: October 2024!!

Sooooo close to catching up now. October I was just trying to get through it but as always gotta make the time to read.

Z-chan by Shingo Iguchi I first learned about in the book Dream Land Japan by Frederick L Schodt. A lot of the works he highlighted in that book actually remain untranslated or only got one recently (I had actually forgotten he did a spotlight on Murasaki Yamada!) Z-Chan was one of the works that got a spotlight, having initially run in Garo as part of a larger multimedia arts project by Iguchi. The surreal story of Z-Chan and the mouse Richard Sex operates on multiple levels and parallel worlds with with a serialized novella about the little gnome people with colored hats who live in parallel to Z-Chan inserted between or on top of the manga itself. A really beautiful and innovative use of the comic form, with an ending that will stick with me for a long time going forward. The Lotus edition which I read is to my knowledge the "complete" version including the appearance of the bear named Baron.

Otaku Vampire's Love Bite by Julietta Suzuki just strted its english language run. And while it isn't a high school romance but made me remember how I don't really have any fantasy romcoms in my life right now so its a beyond welcome presence. I feel like I'm in good hands with Julietta Suzuki, Kamisama Kiss was very formative for me but I didn't keep up with any of her follow up work. I really like the art style she's adopted now and the humor and clashing personalities is just what I'm hoping for. Cynically though this opening volume is a rather interesting illustration on how participation in otaku culture is increasingly consumer oriented. So in volume 1 I'm like mister male lead not very taken by the titular otaku vampire's fannish behavior as must confide in all honesty, find it to be kinda sucker behavior to do what she does which is filling her home with the low effort plastic merch the animanga industry is pumping out in dizzying amounts but I'm hoping the later volumes will get more into the creative, social, or community building aspect of being a fan that I do find to be a more interesting angle to the culture. But its funny and I'm interested in seeing how her world of vampires will intersect with our world in the upcoming volumes.

Natsuko Taniguchi has been extremely productive these past few years and there's even more stuff from her back catalogue waiting for me. And she got 2 ongoing serials! The one I want to highlight (as I havent read the second yet lol) is Jaa Anta ga Tsukutte Miro yo (Well, Why Don't You Try Making It) is one young man with an outdated chauvinistic mindset getting knocked to the present day when his cute, diligent, master of his beloved high effort japanese style dishes, girlfriend of many years suddenly dumps him. Autopsying the corpse of his shattered relationship quickly reveals that he's nitpicky and thankless behavior did him no favors. Forced with the reality of the situation he realized he must change, bc no Reiwa era woman wants a man stuck in the chauvinist Shouwa era.

What I like is how its not just His story, but Hers as well. His ex girlfriend is herself unpacking the culture of the good and perfect woman that she had completely immersed herself in. Her hair and clothes never strayed off trend, she strictly monitored how she behaved in front of men so they wouldn't be put off by her, never got along with other women especially ones who were bad at performing like she did. But it all changes once a young woman with a flashy style and "alien" like hair color crashes into her world and makes it just a bit bigger. I didn't stress it in the last roundup but social commentary is on the trend alert for manga in the 2020s and I'm really looking forward to see where it will go.

Like I've talked about before about veterans who just really know what they're doing... Tennen Kokekko by Fusako Kuramochi was made when she was 20 years in the industry. By this point she's a very early adopter of digital tools for art and the way she draws is near unrecognizable from her work in the 70's-80's. I wish the bunko covers were less plain because ohhh my god. To see someone play with layouts, techniques, and form while telling a beautiful but complicated coming of age story that isn't just the young protagonists' story but the adults' as well. My mistake is not talking about this series as I was reading it bc now I'm just way too overwhelmed about what I want to say that I can't get anything out aside from gushing but this work truly is by someone who really polished their storytelling abilities and never stopped challenging themselves artistically. Might make a spotlight post because the live action movie being the only thing that made it over to the english language truly does make me feel like we've deprived of something. Ooooooor it will appear in the queue 🙂‍↕️

[cultofcreatures]

My Top 15 Vaporwave Horror Movies

I thought I would put together a list of vaporwave/dreamcore/liminal aesthetic horror movies that I find to feel outside of time and space. That's sort of my vibe here on tumblr, and I also like the mantra of "if there's something you want to see that no one has made yet, make it yourself." These are films that I personally love, and the list not meant to be definitive. Remember also that art is subjective. I hope someone out there finds at least one film they want to add to their watchlist! It's been a minute since I've seen some of them, so let me know if I need to correct something.

15. Mandy (2018)

I wish I could add pictures for all of these entries, but I can still only add 10 pictures to a post blah. It's such a shame because I wanted to show off that gorgeous aesthetics of all these films. Oh well. This is a revenge flick about a cult kidnapping Nick Cage's girlfriend and him losing his marbles about it. Definitely recommend if you're the mood for vibes and/or Nick Cage NickCageing.

TW: violence, blood, fire

14. Come True (2020)

This is a haunting, fantastic vibes movie. It feels so otherworldly. It's about a homeless young person participating in a sleep study to be able to safely get some sleep. It would be an almost perfect film if it weren't for the just garbage ending. If you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't, just skip the last 5 minutes, and take it for what the rest of the film is: beautiful.

13. Braid (2018)

This film follows a couple of young drug dealers on the run from their supplier crashing at a mentally unwell friend's house. The catch is they have to play along with their host's unhinged "game" while they hide out. Not gonna lie, this film is trippy af and definitely not for everyone. I can guarantee that no matter what, it is a ride.

TW: heavy drug use, blood

12. Perfect Blue (1997)

A pop star retires to become a full-time actor, which angers some of her fans. Her sense of reality becomes warped when one obsessive fan begins to stalk her. I don't love some of the turns this movie takes when it comes to mental health, but it's hard to deny this film is classic that has stunning animation.

TW: negative depictions of mental disorders, violence, blood

11. Skinamarink (2022)

This controversial found footage movie is sort of hard to describe because it's so otherworldly. Basically, two kids wake up one night to find their dad and all of their doors and windows are missing. Everything about this nostalgic yet terrifying film is vibes and aesthetic: liminal, vaporwave, voidcore, dreamcore, you name it. It feels like a fever dream, and it's a nightmarish journey you won't soon forget, for better or worse.

10. Vivarium (2019)

A couple are looking for a home to share. They follow a strange realtor to an even stranger labyrinthine neighborhood that seems to have no escape. If you're into liminal spaces, this film will definitely scratch that itch for you.

9. Revenge (2017)

This is a r*pe revenge tale that has absolutely beautiful scenery and cinematography. I love the sweeping liminal landscapes and vibrant vaporwave colors. It's a standard plot as far as the genre goes, but it's directed by a woman, so it has a different angle that I find to be superior to most films of the genre.

TW: violence, gore, SA, blood

8. Don't Worry Darling (2022)

A 1950s housewife begins to suspect that something about her utopian community is not what it seems. This film seems to be a bit controversial, too, for some reason. Whatever the case may be, I adore the liminality and dreamy feel of this film. You really get a sense that this world is outside of time and space.

7. It Follows (2014)

This film is straight up about a sexually transmitted curse. Jay sleeps with her boyfriend for the first time, and then finds out she must outpace this demon that can take the shape of anyone forever lest it kill her, or she must pass the curse on to someone else. The shots in this film are to die for. Especially for connoisseurs of the liminal, vaporwave, and dreamcore. Highly recommend for the visuals and music alone.

TW: gore, blood

6. House (1977)

Gorgeous decides to stay with her aunt to hopefully get closer with a group of six of her friends. The girls come to find her aunt's house is more than meets the eye. The visuals and absurdity are what make this movie. It's a classic for a reason.

TW: cartoon gore

5. Akira (1988)

Tetsuo gains psychic abilities via a secret military project and becomes mad with power. It's up to his friends and a small group of psychics to stop him. This is another classic anime. Its 1980s futuristic mentality really lends itself to the vaporwave atmosphere of the cityscape. I highly recommend this classic if you haven't seen it.

TW: violence, body horror

4. Censor (2021)

Enid is a serious film censor with a shrouded past that includes her long-missing sister. She watches a film that bears eerie resemblance to her vague childhood memories that begin to take hold of her as tries to piece them together. I don't think I'm totally clear on when this film takes place, which is what I love about it. It has a spooky surreal quality that will both draw you in and unsettle you.

TW: violence, blood

3. She Dies Tomorrow (2020)

Amy is convinced she is going to die tomorrow. Her friend Jane comes by to comfort her, and then becomes consumed by the thought she will die tomorrow as well. This film is as strange as it is beautiful. It will either leave you in tears or confused af or both.

TW: blood

2. The Neon Demon (2016)

Jesse is a very young, gifted model who is new in town (probably LA). She quickly signs with an agent and begins getting gigs, breeding the contempt of the established models around her. This is probably one of the most visually appealing films I've ever seen. The music is on point. The low key acting is a vibe. I just adore this film. 10/10, highly recommend.

TW: gore, blood

1. The Platform (2019)

A man wakes up in a prison that is an indescribable liminal pit where there are a seemingly never-ending number of levels. A platform full of food is lowered through each level once a day, and everyone on the lower levels must fight to survive. This film is just so utterly anticapitalist and gorgeous that I can't help but sing its praises. I think everyone should watch this movie at least once. It is horrifying yet eye-opening. Certainly one of my favorite films of all time.

TW: gore, violence, blood

Thank you for reading my list! Like I said, I wanted to make a list like this because I couldn't find one when I went looking. I hope you found something to add to your watchlist! I tried to include some of the big TWs for these movies, but they're far from complete lists. So please check websites like doesthedogdie.com for more complete TW lists if you have any concerns. Make decisions that are right for you. Thanks again, and have a happy and safe new year! xx

[msheadcannons]

first meet

lena oberdorf x reader headcannons

after transferring from chelsea to bayern in august 2021, you were relieved to finally have a club that might recognize your efforts

its not like you were a bad player. in fact, you were a highly rated midfielder--but chelsea didn't make you a regular starter anymore after your third season there, which started to affect your national team callups.

the first bayern vs wolfsburg game in november, you were starting as an attacking midfielder. this excited you, you haven't faced wolfsburg since the champions league back in 2020.

did you know lena oberdorf? not personally. you knew of her though, and she knew of you too.

in the 35th minute of the game, lena mistimed her classic side tackle on you. after you weaved around popp and hendrich, you found yourself being tripping onto the ground after feeling someones foot kick right into your ankle.

of course, you stayed on the ground due to a little bit of pain. lena stood back, looking at you as the ref held up a yellow card. after going to the sidelines and checking back into the game-- lena put her hand on your shoulder to make sure that you were okay.

you were fine, but you weren't too happy about the tackle. you regret it to this day, but you told her annoyingly, "I am, but maybe you should time it correctly next time."

after the game, everyone gave their handshakes.

lena held your hand and at the same time, you apologized to her for being a smartass.

"hey, I'm sorry about being rude on the pitch."

"its no worries. I should've timed my tackle correctly." lena responded back in a strong german accent.

you didn't know this, but lena already found you attractive. ever since that champions league game back when you were at Chelsea, she's wanted to find a time to get to know you more-- and maybe the time is now.

"wait--" lena says as you let go of her hand.

you turn back to lena with a smile, wondering what she needed.

"I'll be in munich for a couple of days, I'm supposed to hang out with lea tomorrow morning but maybe we could go out for dinner tomorrow evening? just to get to know each other more." lena whispers in your ear, just so lipreader with the cameras can't catch what she is telling you.

"are you asking me out on a date, lena oberdorf?" you smirk.

"I am." lena boldly says.

"well, we can certainly have dinner tommorow. I'll get your number from lea so we can text before then," you smile as you rub your hand up and down lena's waist.

"see you then." lena smirks before jill roord came over to speak to her.

the first date, just a day after the game, went perfectly. you went to the italian restaurant in a casual ivory colored sweater and blue jeans, while lena wore black cargos and a army green hoodie with a few branding logos on it.

the both of you discussed long distance (#uhaullesbians) and agreed that communication would be key to making everything work

you knew that you had feelings for lena after the dinner, when you realized that most of your conversations didn't center around your jobs. everything else was talked about. family, friends, your home country, video games, other hobbies, just not all of it had to do with football.

after the dinner, you took lena back to her hotel where wolfsburg stayed in. you got out of the car and the both of you talked more for another twenty minutes outside of the hotel.

it was fast, very fast, but the both of you kissed goodbye.

she already had feelings for you, but it seems like you're falling harder for the german woman.

[lolashifts]

hii ml you you have an amazing day! so i have a few shifting doubts if you don’t mind!i have known it since 2020 and attempted many times in 2021,but i havent tried ever since lol.In 2021 I *think* i shifted,i did the pillow method and my eyes opened instantly(how i scripted they would once i got in my dr),my feet n hands were tingling and i was laying down watching some white above me(like the ceiling above me.could have been in my cr room but my lights were off and it was nightime).i thought it was too soon for me to open my eyes, so i closed them and i shifted back lol

but anyway srry for the long story!i have some trouble with setting intention,do you have any tips?i know i can shift and trust myself,but i dont really know what to affirm and how to set an intention

hi love thank you sm for the ask <3 and don’t worry about the story, i don’t mind at all 🤍

intention has probably been a pain in the ass for everybody in the shifting community at some point so it’s totally normal, you’re not doing anything wrong !!

i guess some people just happen to “crack the code” earlier than others for reasons that are still unknown to us, and it’s fine because this is a personal journey and it’s different for everybody !

now, you have to remember that the key to intention is consistency: decide you will wake up in your desired reality, trust yourself that it’s going to happen, and persist with this knowledge until you see it in your 3D (real life) and not just in your imagination!

If you keep telling yourself something you start to believe it, right? that’s what you want your subconscious to do! your subconscious doesn’t know what’s real and what isn’t, meaning it will start to believe what you say and catch up with your intentions, so you WILL wake up in your dr. you just need to accept you already have what you want and that will do the trick! you can visualise yourself already owning what you desire, embodying all the emotions you’d feel knowing you just got what you wished for, and persist until it’s really yours.

plus, you HAVE shifted before, and you can use that to your advantage to prove to yourself you’re fully capable of doing it !!

i know it can be hard to grasp, and to understand it better i suggest for you to read a few things on the law of assumption, which many people on here have talked in depth about and much better than i could ever do! one i totally recommend is @hrrtshape (emma i looove you and your blogs so sm)

as for affirmations, you can say anything you want as long at it’s not counterproductive for you! i’d say to use positive affirmations only, preferably in the present tense. there are not set things to affirm really, like affirming facts about your dr self to help you and your subconscious believe that you are that person. i usually affirm things such as “i shift with ease”, “i don’t fear shifting”, “i am limitless”, “i already have all my desires” and so on. the truth is you need to find what works best for you and be creative with your sentences if it helps !!

i hope this answer will be helpful even just a little. you’ve got this <3

[berlinini]

I can't sleep because after having (superficially) processed what happened, I can't wrap my head around what did not happen, which is Louis headlining Red Rocks, one of the world's most iconic venue.

I can't stop thinking about that quote about grief being love with nowhere to go, and I'm grieving what we didn't get.... I have been looking forward to this show since it was announced, since I luckily got a ticket in the 3rd row, since I've been lucky to attend some FITWT shows, and I thought wooow Red Rocks is gonna blow everyone's mind... Everyone around me was aware I was travelling to Denver for that show. It meant so much to me.

I got robbed of something that I was supposed to be the pinnacle of my FITFWT experience. I can slowly make peace with that but I'm so upset that Louis got robbed of his experience. This show was obviously meaningful to him - from being mentioned in the IGTV caption, to the show's special poster, to the special merch, the "bucket list show" mentions.... to the fact that up until the last minute there was still a hope that the show would go on. FITFWT deserved this venue, his songs deserved to be played against that beautiful background.

My mind kept going to that footage from LTWT 2020 when he says he can't catch a break. I was standing probably meters away from him and thinking he was probably thinking the same. I could imagine how heartbroken he was - this time with the added weight of fans' safety. I am so upset that this keeps happening to him.

It was also supposed to be a special celebration for louies and I'm sad we got robbed of that communal joy too.

It just feels so very unfair, and there's nothing to do with all these emotions - sadness, anger, disapointment - because it is what it is. It could have been worse and I'm glad no one was seriously injured. But it could have also been the sensational and cathartic experience it was supposed to be.

[grison-in-space]

Part of the problem with trying to protect young people from exploitation and grooming by extremist elements of the manosphere is that our understanding of exploitation and how to tackle it is still hopelessly out of touch. Dr. Firmin explained that the very hallmarks of adolescence that most attract young men to these online communities are also the ones least understood by traditional support mechanisms. During adolescence, young people prioritize belonging, self-autonomy, and independence. This, she said, is a period in which young people are struggling with intense emotions: they are “more inclined to take risks” and are particularly unlikely to think about “long-term consequences.” As such, traditional support services are not well suited to this period, because they tend to be “targeted at individuals who don’t like to take risks and will think about the long-term consequences of their behavior and will be generally emotionally stable.”
While support structures struggle against these typical adolescent behaviors, Dr. Firmin explained, those who exploit young people “will tend to work with” them, offering children

a sense of risk or going against the grain, focus on short-term gains, what it means in the here and now, and push aside the potential negative long-term consequences… They will provide means by which you can be very emotionally driven and passionate…and also validate those emotions as authentic when other adults are saying, “Don’t get so worked up.”

All this resonates powerfully with the tactics of the manosphere. Young people are offered a highly emotive narrative and a sense of deep belonging and community. They are repeatedly encouraged, in incel forums, for example, to take violent action that would position them as countercultural disrupters without thinking too much about the consequences. “It’s very easy to sell those ideas,” Dr. Firmin added, in a community that boasts about “going against the norm.” In the case of the manosphere, she said, that manifests as “pushing against this idea of new masculinity…or men’s increased role in parenting… This narrative would push against all of that, push against #MeToo, so it’s very easy then to sell it as a risk and sell it into this idea of wanting a sense of self, a sense of personal identity.” In some respects, she said, given the current climate, the attractiveness of the manosphere to young men is “not very surprising at all.”

Men Who Hate Women, 2020, Laura Bates.

... Ohhhhh. Well, Bates is talking about young men getting sucked into the manosphere, but TERF tactics make a whole lot more sense now, don't they? There's all this uncertainty in our collective lives, and a simple but risky narrative that just requires brave, passionate folks to stand up for what they believe in to fix everything...

Ah.

For that matter, the same patterns totally resonated with me in my teens and twenties; I just had causes that I still feel good about to stand up for, like queer solidarity and ace community raising and allyship as an active choice.

I'm carrying some grief about that this morning—I have a lot of scars that came from being brave and open and riskily vulnerable and trusting my own resilience and hard work to catch me, and it's been a hard, hard ten years. But I also find myself thinking in the same breath: oh. That's the same romantic tendency that's kicking off the wistfulness about labor uprisings I was so critical of last night, and that association builds commitment to changing the critically unfair economic systems of inequality we live with. That's the same energy that makes so many teenagers so emphatic about climate change. That's the thing that makes my grad students stamp feet and snap "well, it shouldn't be like that then!" while I'm trying to do more with less to support them and keep them safe. And sometimes that makes me adjust my course, often for the better.

Stuff like this really renews my commitment to listening to folks who are significantly different in age to me. Sometimes I think they are missing big things in their politics, but sometimes I think that the uncompromising optimism of what could be is a powerful, heady current.

I've only been an adult for about a decade, is the thing, and I've already watched the activism of the generation of millennial activists I grew up alongside make real, profound changes in the status quo, often but not always informed by the support and lessons of generations that have broken the trails before ourselves. I think there can be a certain complacency about that, an idea that younger folks are going to either save us unassisted (lol no) or pick up largely arbitrary battles and waste the momentum of their energy and commitment. I don't think that complacency is a good idea, but it exists. It's worth opposing.

Just like any social construct, generations are both imaginary and profoundly real at the same time, both a wave and a particle at once. It's worth thinking about what people at different ages and life stages need, and it's always worth thinking about how to build coalitions to best channel and support one another.

[sophaeros]

julian casablancas for mojo magazine, november 2024 / issue 372 (x x)

Rock'n'roll Confidential: Julian Casablancas

The Strokes/Voidz mainman talks entitlement, respect and Arctic Monkeys

3AM (Pacific Coast Time) is an atypical hour to schedule an interview. But here's Julian Casablancas, zooming from Los Angeles, where the singer, for so long synonymous with the grit and glamour of New York City, has lived since 2020. He's a busy man: as well as fronting long-running garage rock classicists The Strokes - whose sixth album The New Abnormal won a Grammy in 2020 - he's found a refuge of sorts in his experimental, '80s synths-enabled group The Voidz, whose new LP Like All Before You is imminent. Talking to MOJO, Casablancas remains in shadow, his eyes occasionally reflecting dim light. "I can be a vampire," he promises. "You want a real rock star, bro? But I can be flexible and go into family mode too…"

What are you doing up at 3am, talking to MOJO? It's about the only time I have free. The rest of the time, it's videos and working with managers, going to concerts, social things… so l go all the way around, to crazy night hours.

The new album starts with Overture and ends with Walk Off - is there a concept lurking within? I guess a little. Maybe subconsciously. It hopefully hits if you have taken mushrooms. I had just watched Gone With The Wind, and they used to have overtures at the beginning of movies, and then we end the album with a synthesizer version. But it is not a rock opera story. If anything, the concept was going to be a one-word album title. At first, it was Zeal, then Perseverance.

How do you switch mindsets between Voidz and Strokes songwriting? Voidz songs are where my mind has been pushing me, and where I want to go, and where I am. But the ability or capability or muscle memory of writing Strokes-sequel stuff is just always going to be there. When those songs appear, it makes more sense to put them in each category, but it's not always that clear. But there's more 'no-limits' with The Voidz.

You recently said, "My current solution is to tour with The Strokes and then use the money to record with The Voidz." How did that happen? Years of drama and betrayals and horseshit (laughs). Honestly, l am cool with most of the dudes, and now we're more mature. It's not what I set out to do, but it's a fun, cool day job that I feel blessed to have. But let's just say I was only in a band called Zog, and whatever I worked on 10 years ago in Zog, I would not be interested in any more, I'm only interested in what I'm working on now. It's just the nature of music and creativity, you know?

What did you set out to do with The Strokes? I just wanted to challenge boundaries, and to have an ambitious collective of respectful teammates. Is that The Voidz? For me, yes.

The cliché about Strokes issues is that you were rich kids who weren't hungry enough. Any truth in that? Success affects people in different ways. I'd say there are some elements, probably from me as well, where you can be entitled… all kinds of bands have fallings outs and drama. It wasn't like, Oh, we don't need the money. I think it did take a lot of hunger to get there, but then after you've achieved something, when everyone is kissing each individual member's ass… OK, let's get back to work and do it again. It was like, Uh, no thanks. That's my assessment.

The Arctic Monkeys song Star Treatment starts out, "I just wanted to be one of The Strokes." What was your reaction? I thought, Be careful what you wish for. It was funny, and flattering. I have a lot of respect for Alex and those boys.

Tell us something you've never told an interviewer before. I've been trying to communicate with crows lately. I heard they have an intricate sonic language, but I haven't had any luck. It occurred to me that food would help, so I was trying to feed one M&M's earlier, but he wasn't having it. People can catch me making weird noises, trying to mimic the crow. I think the crows are more startled than the humans.

As told to Martin Aston

JULIAN, DOPE Five of Casablancas's crackers.

Brian Eno Burning Airlines Give You So Much More (ISLAND, 1974)

Benny Goodman Good-Bye (VICTOR, 1936)

Kate Bush Why Should I Love You? (EMI, 1993)

Max Richter Path 5 (Delta) (DEUTSCHE GRAMMOPHON, 2015)

BEAK> Secrets (INVADA, 2024)

[kodas]

I would love to hear more about your headlights/brain-critters

aaaaaa thank u for taking interest!! some have a couple nicknames. from left to right: pup/ruff (it), fawn/flux (it), daze (it), red/"pants" (it), mothdog/(???) (they/it), flow crow (they/it)

my headlights often co-front, so distinctions between the lights are only easy to draw a line for if I'm heavily dysregulated or burnt out. usually I have more than one light on. lights depicted next to each other frequently front together (ie, pup+fawn or snail+red or fawn+daze, etc.)

if I'm doing very well and feeling present (& not experiencing any derealization), most of my lights will be on at the same time. they all make up who I am as "koda" and all identify with being koda, but they each have different circumstances to be "on call" for and different needs/goals on their own. not being lit means that light might have to play 'catch up' to remember details of events they weren't present for. I have memory problems lol

if the appropriate light isn't turning on when it needs to, another light will fill in but they won't have the ability to do the 'job' quite the same, leading to faster burnout. this applies to everything: tasks, games, project production, communication, forms of intimacy, etc. drawing with and without flowcrow produces a different quality of output, for example. this is why I call it flowcrow lol. back when I streamed art as puddle it'd usually be a combination of flow+moth. when I was doing xko gameplay streams, it was often pup+fawn with moth or flow chaperoning.

when other lights are out and only fawn is active, I'm in some state of awe. often this means the freeze or fawn response, even in good situations or around trusted people. I like drawing it full of stars when depicted with wonder or feeling intense adoration. it 'lights up' by turning the lights out and gettin' all starry.

moth is on-call and does most of our masking in public situations or anything outside, and is almost always in a state of hypervigilance. they're most active in social situations/group environments and body maintenance and tires out often. mothdog is the only headlight that eats, the others are repulsed by eating or show disinterest. I've been drawing them more like a black wolf-like dog/chowchow with mothman features because they're pretty stand-offish, so cryptid iconography hits right. there's been a long-standing desire to give it a name outside of 'mothdog' but all suggestions so far are met with a "no not that ❌" so we're not rushin it.

flowcrow is an on-call chaperone to other lights for certain activities, but isn't always available and sometimes fucks off (lol). it often switches on for life admin/planning tasks or stuff like learning languages/math, more exhausting comprehensive stuff.

flowcrow and daze solo-front more than any other light but are admittedly pretty antisocial/introverted. flowcrow can feel a complete disconnect from the body and daze is the opposite, unable to shut-off feeling chronic pain unless in trance. (my partners catch me staring off for a long while usually stuck in a memory or trauma flashback. when they 'wake' me, daze is usually no longer solo fronting). daze straight up does not like to be perceived outside of the body, but sometimes has to when all other lights are out.

pup and red are highly reactive and unmasked, they light up all the time with other lights active, but only feel safe enough to solo-front for long around partners/incredibly close friends.

I draw red as a nightcrawler because it's influenced by my delayed flee response, but I also like using ghost imagery for it too. if anthropomorphized further I make it a bit more doggy-like. there are times when red disappears completely for days (sometimes weeks) and I tend to depict it resting within daze because they are connected

anyhow, I've been working out the details on these critters since... late 2019? early 2020? I drew my first diagram for them in 2020

in 2023 I made some comics with my lights drawn as critters. I started working on my dissociation/dysregulation/cptsd in therapy back in 2016/2017. I have a bit more info about them on my website's about page, but the detail I go into is limited over there. way before that I made 'headspace' (a couple of animated shorts about puddle having more puddles in their head) knowing I had a dissociative disorder & cptsd but not feeling comfortable to really get into the details of each light and the purpose they serve. for that cartoon I narrowed it down to 4 lights. to this day I still group them when I talk about them, like on this blog with my tags. #daze is for both daze+red, #ddog is for fawn+pup.

thank you for asking, anon. I've been wanting to actually type all of this out for posting but often got spooked and backspaced a lot before getting your ask. we really appreciate the nudge🌌

obligatory disclaimer:

I'm not interested in syscourse. I recognize every system forms the way it does for reasons to suit the life the body experiences. if you experience plurality, you might not experience the 'divide' and co-fronting in the same way I do. that being said, I know my lights are sourced from my cptsd and strong cognitive dissonance I held for a lot of my early upbringing and a means of which to cope with the circumstances I was trapped in. it formed when I was very young, with fragmentation occuring throughout adolescence. where I can specifically draw lines and similarities between my lights and certain abstractions/iconographies are specfic to my experience with dissociation & multiplicity and does not apply to all or any other systems.

[drdemonprince]

are there any medium articles or other essays you've written that you have a different perspective on now? Whether a small bullet point or the entire objective of a piece. It's interesting following your journey while catching up on the archive

Ohhhh yeah. In a big way. My thinking on nearly all matters continues to evolve, so much so that I always cringe a bit at some phrasings in my books by the time they are out.

In my work on Medium you can see a strong inconsistency in how I think about several topics -- I've gone through periods of disparaging my family, to extending them grace, to thinking I have a moral responsibility to fight with them, to regretting my rage at them, to calling my parents abusive, and on and on. On this topic, it's not so much that my feelings have changed, so much as each point of view represents one facet of the same gem I'm spinning in my mind's eye.

My thoughts on sexual assault and justice have evolved a ton. Around the time of the Weinstein and Ansari accusations, I wrote a lot about rape and coercion. Then a dear friend experienced an assault and was not believed by a huge friend group that we shared and I took on an even more hardline, believe-all-victims-and-take-action-swiftly-to-protect-them stance. I was more traumatized and dysphoric back then too.

My hardline stance eventually came into conflict with my abolitionism, and my growing respect for the importance of personal discernment that emerged more and more over the course of the pandemic. I just saw too many people who were afraid to exercise their own discernment on a wide array of topics and who amplified vague callouts of all kinds without skepticism (god, remember the Wayfair conspiracy?), and I saw how such formless accusations harmed the marginalized in particular. And all the gormless attacks on "narcissists" as the cause of abuse really chilled me. all that strongly tempered my dogmatism.

But I have also witnessed the "anti cancel culture" squad fail to live up to any value system whatsoever and I have fought with them a lot quite openly over their frequently racist, transphobic, theory-free views. All I know today is that navigating these waters is very, very hard, and that I am only in control of living by my values and being outspoken about them and that attempts to manipulate a moral response out of other people don't work and that information is only as good as my knowledge about who and where it came from. I think my evolution on all this closely tracks with the shifts in the zeitgeist -- it's rare for me to be that on pace with the average person I meet.

My perspective on how a meaningful difference in the world is made has changed. In 2016 I was calling politicians for an hour every day on livestream to protest this or that conservative bill. Now i'm an anarchist with minimal regard for electoral politics or any formal institutions. I did vote for Brandon Johnson though.

But by far the piece that least reflects my current understanding of things is one from 2020 called "Against Community." But that one was never meant to be a prescription for how people should live their lives. It was just a description of where I was at emotionally, having watched multiple friend groups disintegrate over abuse, triangulation, and bad boundaries. I'm glad I don't have to feel that way now. It was the growth after that experience that led to my revelation that communities are just relationships you build, and keep building, not static places you find.

On the whole I am less angry now, less dogmatic, less inclined to believe that electoral work matters or that posting is activism, less hellbent on making everybody agree with me, more comfortable with mourning, more radical, more patient, less grandiose and less hung up on what other people think of me. Despite all that i am still a very arrogant angry neurotic stressed out self superior insecure person.

Thanks for this great question. When I hold fake interviews with myself in the shower, it's being asked things like this that I fantasize about.

[hotfuss]

Little big rant ahead:

I joined the fandom with the start of ww era after the previous i was in turned into a literal dumpster on fire. And while it was clear in hindsight that the golden era of the tk fandom was around 2012-2014 (maybe it can be stretched to 2015), ww era wasn't bad either. Yeah the majority of the old guard/bfn was inactive or waning their presence a lot and basically disappeared the moment the ww tour ended we still had:

- gif/edit/moodboard makers

- art makers (not a lot but a few at least!!!)

- people posting pics from other social media. Either band photos or encounters with fans. Like people were ''fighting'' to be the first to repost the band insta pics!!

- people who weren't content creators but that at least they reblogged with funny tags. No, i didn't mind seeing the same pic of brandon 7 times during my catch up scrolling if 4 of them put some kind of tags to read in them (funny/horny/roasting him), that was the enrichment!!

Then the tour ended and fandom activity shrunk to 1/10 of what it used to be. Ressurrected briefly for their appearance at glasto 2019.

Lol thais liked a post about me complaining about not wanting to post 2 gifsets i made bc the fandom was too dead and i didn't want to waste them. It's dated 3 years ago!!!

Then 2020 happened. The pandemic, their social media silence on the blm protests (the bar was literally on the floor... we only wanted a social media post giving support!!!! How come the bootlickers were all up brandon's ass about how difficult it was to rewrite a whole verse of land of the free to play on tv in 2 weeks but posting a black pic on insta tagged blm was too hard??? HOW?), the horrific situation of the roadie hazing happened in the past that resurfaced... like i don't blame anyone who didn't want to engage with the band afterwards (bc they are some good reasons!! I will never forget how they let us down! And while the hazing wasn't perpetrated by the band members it was still such a horrible situation that shouldn't have happened!)

But this was a complete mass extinction here on tumblr. Of all the fandom communities this seems the only one that died like this.

We are currently left with

- 3,5 gif makers

- maybe 2 art makers if i include myself

- maybe 2 people posting pics including myself

No consistent edit/moodboards/meme makers no consistent reposting of official pics from their socials. The like/reblog ratio on posts is 3:1 on good days and close to 4:1 or 5:1 on bad days. I wake to notes (when i get any) that are 80-90% likes. Most of the rare reblogs don't have any kind of commentary at all.

I could easily run my queue for 7-10 days just with posts i could find on my dash, almost zero effort bc i was fed content on my dash. Nowadays i need to spend hours on blogs/my drafts/my bookmarks to put something together, only for likes. It gets tiring easily with a soul and energy sucking job to do to survive only to barely get any reward (reblogs with tags to read). This community will never recover on people who refuse to use the reblog button

It's even harder to compare this fandom to the mcr one, yeah it's a quite unique situation bc having such a thriving fandom despite the band being broken up most of tumblr's life is INSANE but you can't help getting angry/sad at why did they survive but not us? I can reblog so much fanart on my sideblog!! People posting pics!! Many archivial blogs!! The gifsets!! It just feels so unfair!

[rivetgoth]

2020s Industrial/EBM & Friends

Hi all! I decided to go ahead and make a Spotify playlist of current artists in the industrial/EBM [and adjacent] scene. I am very tired of stumbling onto countless threads of people saying that industrial music is "dead." It is in fact currently experiencing an incredible booming renaissance! So here is a place where one could hopefully get started.

The requirements for this playlist are simply

Must be within the industrial/EBM scene or close enough to count by my own standards. Trying to avoid anything too far off, so keeping "sibling" genres to a minimum (for example, darkwave or aggrotech), but obviously the genre has evolved very much over the decades and there is still plenty of fusion and diversity in sound!

Must have released new music since 2020 or onwards. This playlist is a combination of older artists who are continuing to release new music (such as PIG and IAMX) as well as brand new artists who have just begun their career with debut EPs (such as Normal Bias and FUEDAL). The only requirement is making new music from 2020 to present; this isn't about new bands per se, just currently active ones. I would like to keep updating this playlist as time goes on and more artists release new work, but that may end up being a time commitment larger than I can promise, so no guarantee on that. But hopefully!

One song per band. This is just to keep things consistent. I wanted to pick a song for each band that's either somewhat popular so as to give an idea of what they're doing that's catching people's attention, and/or a personal preference of my own that I think is cool and worth checking out, lol. Order doesn't matter at all, you can shuffle it as much as you like.

While artists from all backgrounds are featured and I want to make an active effort not to tokenize, I did try to include a wide range of diverse artists, with numerous artists of color, female artists, queer artists, neurodivergent artists, etc on this list.

A few other preemptive Q&As:

"[x] band I like isn't on here!"

I am absolutely, 100% confident I have missed more bands than I can even fathom, this is a massive genre and this playlist is in no way whatsoever meant to be comprehensive. I definitely want this playlist to continue to evolve over time. I also admittedly may have not included a band because I just don't really personally care for them enough, or because I didn't feel like they quite fit the sound I was thinking of here. Feel free to send me an ask if you feel like I'm missing something important, and even if I'm not huge on a band, if it seems like they're high in demand I might add them for posterity, lol.

"[x] band isn't real industrial"

Again, this genre has evolved massively since its formation in the 70s. We all know that. I don't really care about splitting hairs too much when it comes to genres; I'm basing this on the scene as it's currently evolved, the community surrounding it (including who these bands play with and the festivals booking them), the cited inspirations and self identification of the bands themselves, and if I personally would be able to sleep at night if I called them industrial in casual conversation, LMAO. I also consider fusion genres a very important part of the life and evolution of a genre, so industrial hip hop, industrial metal, and the likes all make some appearances.

"Spotify sucks"

Yeah. Agreed entirely, cannot argue with you there. But this is the easiest avenue I know of to make a decent, accessible playlist for a wide variety of listeners. Please do check out these artists offsite, follow them on Bandcamp or their other social media sites, buy their music and merch, etc. Unfortunately this also means that many artists who are not on Spotify aren't featured here, which sucks, since there are some absolutely amazing industrial bands coming out of Bandcamp right now who deserve recognition. Here is a link to the "industrial" tag on Bandcamp if you want to dive deeper.

Hopefully at least a few people can get something out of this!!

[iloveschiaparelli]

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes: My Love Letter Part 1

Okay okay okay SO Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes longpost time just my whole opinion/analysis/love letter for the whole film beginning with my Wes Ball backstory so skip to the Ruin screencap if you want to skim past all that.

I haven't talked about it on tumblr yet but I'm actually like a huge fat fan of the Maze Runner cinematic series directed by Wes Ball. Really I'm just a fan of Wes Ball. It not only singlehandedly got me through my first year of high school but also became the reason I ended up entering the film industry. I've watched all 3 movies at least 4-5 times each. Probably like 20-30 for Scorch Trials at this point because it's my favorite. I can quote probably at least half of it from memory. I've watched all of the BTS content that was on the DVDs + the bloopers on youtube like i was obsessed ok.

2019 was like the second worst year of my life so imagine my distress in january 2019 when I found out about Wes Ball's next movie, Mouse Guard, got Super Hyped Up for the multimillion dollar mice-with-swords movie (I eventually read some of the comics btw it's insanely good) And then within the same week found out Disney pulled the plug on the project after acquiring 20th Century Fox. TWO weeks before production was scheduled to begin. I was livid. I'm still bitter about it. Wes Ball then released the demo reel for the film to the public which iirc also had temp music.

So anyway yeah that was awful but then! I think it was later in 2020 that it was announced that Wes Ball was going to be directing the 4th POTA movie. This kicked off me seeing the original 1968 film and then the trilogy and wow did doing so increase my excitement. In my opinion Rupert Wyatt/Matt Reeves' directing styles and Wes Ball's were/are very compatible. I also took the time to get caught up on as much of Wes Ball's old projects as I could get my hands on at the time, including his animated short Ruin (screencap below). Which is fantastic BTW and apparently was purchased by Fox for a feature film that was never made (???) I swear, filmmakers have their past works splattered all over the internet like body parts after a landmine explosion: Good luck finding everything.

Now, Finally Finally FINALLY!!!!!!!! Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is out. I meant to see it on the premier night but my boyfriend broke up with me 2 days before so I forgot. I saw it tonight instead! So now with the backstory out of the way I can finally talk about the actual movie.

First of all, the beginning of the film absolutely WOWed me!!!! It honestly feels like a callback to Ruin, the way that the buildings are overgrown and the post-apocalyptic setting is super evident and feels so delightfully reclaimed by nature. It's also really neat to see how far VFX has come since Ruin was released if you compare the opening shots of the movie with the wide shots in Ruin. Wes Ball himself is also a VFX artist, so it's really neat to see how that affects his work especially since Planet of the Apes is by nature a very vfx-heavy franchise. This movie absoutely popped off in that area but we'll get to that.

Secondly, I forgot how much I missed Ball's directing! Oh my goodness, the performances he gets out of the actors are always so authentic. I still have yet to see a performance by Dylan O'Brien that was as raw and believable as in the Maze Runner movies, and I'm like halfway through Teen Wolf already. In the action scenes especially, I love how characters in Ball's movies, you can really feel their pain. Since pain and physical discomfort aren't communicated directly through film, we often forget just how hard it is to get back up again after getting kicked down, but with Wes Ball you never forget. Ugh, when Noa was getting beat up on top of the bunker at the end of the movie, I caught myself catching my own breath when he coughed up blood. Like, yeowch!

Additionally, everything this man makes is just, like, a masterpiece? On a technical level at least. That's really the mark of a good director, whose job is not only to evoke a performance from the actors, but also to tie together the whole crew. And KOTPOTA really showed off how well the team worked together. Just the establishing shots alone in a lot of these scenes! Oh. My. Word. You can clearly see the fruits of labor of not only the concept artists, but also the VFX artists and production designers, and how they worked with the DP and actors to get the shot. Here are some examples of what I'm talking about:

There are more that I'm thinking of, but unfortunately without a digital release available yet there's a limit to the screencaps that I'm able to obtain. The shot where Noa is walking up the escalator following Raka and you see the plane in the background indicating that Raka lives in an airport is one of them. There's also one or two establishing shots in nature that just show off the setting. The opening shots, of course. And then the shot where it pans up and you see Eagle Village for the first time. There's also an aerial of Proximus Caesar's camp, but I'm unable to find that one as well. The main one I want to look at is the telescope.

Just, like, Hello???? It looks like an art piece. This screencap is a little closer in than I'd like, but in the full frame you can see the absolute mastery of composition that it is, you can totally imagine it as a painting. Which in my experiences usually means there's a painting behind it somewhere in the process, lol. Let's go concept artists!!! But then you see how the colors are just, perfectly balanced, the plant growth is realistic and accentuating the set, and so on and so forth. It was just absolutely breathtaking to see for the first time. I'm pretty sure I audibly gasped. I did a lot of stimming during this movie just to stay quiet and not start babbling about the film pipeline to my father in theater auditorium.

Even more magic happens when Noa steps onto the set, and starts messing with the telescope. Suddenly it's real, it's tangible, it's touchable. Transforming what was likely a matte painting at one point into a set that the actors can interact with, and then into a shot where almost everything is overlaid with VFX, and having it look so real like that is truly magic.

The ship also had me dumbstruck, but slightly less so because we saw a similar setting in The Maze Runner: The Death Cure in 2018. Although it was slightly different for sure. What had me going even more in this movie was how much the characters interacted with the ship, moving in and around it, and trading glances with one another from on the ground and up inside. In TMR:DTC, you really only see the decrepit ships in the background, and one is referenced as a plot point but the characters never actually physically interact with any of them. So it's much easier for our brains to categorize the ships as gimmicks to help us believe the scene.

It's when props like these are woven into the scene as tangible objects that our brains start to shut up about the CGI and really start to believe what's happening onscreen! and KOTPOTA did an amazing job at this. Please bear in mind like, I literally have zero specialization in VFX, it's not my field and although I draw, I've never done concept art for film. I honestly believe that I'm simply in an appropriate level of awe for what this film accomplished.

The other thing that amazed me was how stylized the setting was. The greenery was so green, the ocean felt like a painting, the ship was red, the telescope shot is very, very blue. Several of the shapes used in the ape's costume design are simplified. And yet, despite the stylization, it never feels cartoony or polygonal, it still feels completely grounded in reality, and I could really believe I'd see it in real life. I think this owes partly to the fact that we rarely inspect any of these simplified items at a close distance, aside from Raka's necklace which appears to be made of either bone or whittled wood. It also owes to absolute geniuses in color grading that kept the stylized colors realistic enough for our brains to believe. Overall I'd take the visual style of the film to be Impressionist. I love impressionism.

My main interest in filmmaking is writing/directing. However, most of my experience lies in costume design (Student films rarely need costume "design" so its usually coordination) and production design. As a result I spent a good deal of my time watching KOTPOTA zeroed in on the production design.

I love post-apocalyptic science-fiction/fantasy worlds like this partly precisely because of how much you can learn from the production design alone. When Mae enters Trevathan's room for the first time I swear I was eating it up. Every single prop in this movie was carefully thought out by the PD, which is why his room absolutely stood out from the rest of the setting that we had seen up to that point. It was distinctly "human-centric" as opposed to the rest of the movie. I remember seeing it in the theater earlier today, laying eyes first on the bed by the door, thinking that it must be something they set up for Mae, but then wondering why or how the apes would know or want to set up a human-style bed for Mae when we're so many generations removed from human-dominated society.

Next it was on many miscellaneous table objects, thinking to myself "That looks like how a human would treat a space. Apes are generally too big to decorate at that scale." and then my eyes roved on to the furniture, seeing a human-sized table, human-sized chair, human-sized junk everywhere! Slowly, by observing the room, I gained a stronger and stronger sense of "there is another human here," which upon observing the rows and rows of books became "a smart human like Mae, who unlike her can read" (Remember at this point we still believed that Mae and her mother were the only smart humans that Mae had known growing up, and that she had been pursuing the opportunity to meet other smart humans and join them).

It was only upon the instant of realizing that this was a smart human that Trevathan spoke and appeared on the stairs. It was absolutely perfect timing. THIS, guys, is exceptional production design. It was honestly my absolute favorite piece of production design in the entire film, especially because of how much it contrasted what we've become used to seeing in the series as humans have diminished in population and apes and nature have taken over the space instead.

That exact sense of change or "otherness", that noticeability of contrast upon seeing what is honestly a pretty "normal" human space if you look at it in the context of our existing society, is only present because of how well PD treats the rest of the movie. In order to make a completely normal space feel strange, you have to change literally every other space to something alien but consistent with itself. And KOTPOTA does just that. The job was begun in the original trilogy, with the decline of humanity depicted across decades, nature taking over the gas station and the dam and even the city. But this movie had the biggest challenge because of simply how many years had passed before the story even began. Society as we know it today is completely and totally obliviated in KOTPOTA's setting. In every set that the characters interacted with in any way, PD had to fabricate a space where humans had been but the virus, decades of decay and post-apocalyptic living, and ape encroachment had transformed it.

This also brings me into the subject of the rich culture we see emerging in the world of the apes through this movie. The original trilogy, especially the first and second film, was all about the ape's identity. In the first film Caesar wonders whether he is human or ape, and whether apes are pets or equals to humans. He eventually comes to the realization that humans are never going to look out for apes the way that apes will and decides to become that person. In the second film, Caesar and the other characters involved have to figure out what being an ape means. Does it mean strength is power? That humans are always an enemy to defeated? Or a similar species to live alongside? It's about establishing what the ape race's relationship is to the human race. The third film I didn't get to rewatch before seeing KOTPOTA, but iirc it was about whether humans and apes could ever coexist, which is a theme we see continued in this movie, albeit in a slightly different way. Either that or more likely it was about whether apes will repeat the same mistakes as humans.

Anyway, I digress. In the script we already see a rich culture emerging in hints, right from the start of the movie. It's in the hunt for the eagle eggs at the beginning with mentions of some kind of coming-of-age ceremony, followed by Noa reminding Anaya and Soona that they must "leave one egg always. It is the law." Already in the first five minutes we've established that this particular ape civilization not only has cultural traditions surrounding youth and coming-of-age, but also rituals and laws surrounding their relationship with and the conservation of nature. And through dialogue we extrapolate that these apes have bonded animals (eagles). It honestly felt like a crossover between Native American Indian hunting practices and How To Train Your Dragon, which is wild I know. (Also can we talk about how the eagles in this movie actually made eagle sounds???? And not falcon sounds! Finally we're breaking the bad habit of making up animal noises to sound cooler when the original already sounded super cool by itself.)

So in just a few minutes guys!! We already have so much. Then the trio heads back to the village and has their first encounter with the Echoes (Ekos? If anyone could get spelling on that for me that would be fantastic) but are too afraid (or law-bound) to get too close to or cross through the tunnel "into the valley below". So through these we establish that there is a taboo around not just humans but also around leaving the village. The clan has taken an isolationist approach wherein they not only forbid their young clan members from leaving but also withhold information about the outsiders from them until they've come of age. Guys the cultural system arising here is absolutely wild. Like sorry not sorry but I eat this stuff up. (Screenwriters-- this is prime example material of "show don't tell")

There's also all of the ape social communication rules that we've already gotten used to, mainly a variation of the palm-up/palm-down gesture as a means of showing respect (submission) and asking for permission/approval.

In this movie however the hands are mostly closed and the palms are down for the sub as well as the ape they're seeking approval from, as opposed to the trilogy in which the submitting ape always had their palm up. At first I chalked this up to cultural differences among clans since we learned that this clan is not the clan descended from Caesar's apes in the trilogy, but then Caesar's descendants were doing it this way too? So I don't really know what to make of it but I'm going to decide that it's just global cultural evolution (at least, as global as the real-world evolution of Old English into modern English).

Through the production design of the beginning sequence in Eagle Village, we see that the eagles catch fish and then the vast quantities of fish and the smokehouse indicate that fish caught by the eagles are the main source of food for the Eagle Clan. We also see feathers as a motif throughout, worn especially by the parents and the elders as a sign of social status (we know it's social status bc Sylva rips it off of one of the elders as an intimidation tactic and everyone audibly gasps, indicating it worked). That last bit is honestly more costume design, they popped off too but one thing at a time or I'm going to become incomprehensible. I will repeat myself. It is inevitable.

Then throughout the film we learn that not only do they adhere strictly to the "law", but that that law is set by the elders alone. We also learn that they primarily relate to their eagles by singing to them which!!! is just!!!! so!!! metal!!! I love it. The way it plays into the end scene with Proximus just AGHRGHJHRHGR GROWL BARK BARK FERAL NOISES>

ahem

Also we see them building nests at home for their eagles and they've figured out falconry tools for the aerie and everything on their own like??

Then in contrast we see what's left of Caesar's clan, it's descendants. Proximus Caesar, we learn later from Trevathan, has gone completely fangirl over the ancient roman empire and decided to emulate it because "he likes it" and it makes him "feel good" (yeah he's probably the most textbook tyrant I've ever seen in media), choosing to morph Caesar's teachings into his own new worldview rather than adhering to them properly.

So the culture of Caesar's clan is very heavily roman-influenced, often copying practices outright such as the insitution of slavery, a lot of the fashion choices and even the way that banners are put up around the camp and the way that Proximus dines at a low-set table filled with an overabundance of food. And he has a throne and crown, and there are roman numerals inscribed on both his and Sylva's necklaces. But we still see influences of Caesar's original society, most noticeably the persistence of the window symbol and the architecture of the dam. The architecture wouldn't be significant at all, instead being noted as a stylistic choice for the whole series, if it weren't for the fact that it's different from Eagle Clan's architecture.

If Eagle Village resembles those spaghetti bridges that engineers build for class, with thatched roofs, then the dam at Caesar Clan's camp is much more brutalist by comparison. Eagle Clan was very spindly and focused on height and lightness of building materials: many of the logs were thinner and longer, more spaced out, and sometimes rounded at the ends. By contrast, Caesar Clan's dam is built with stumpier logs, closer together, and spiked at the top. The dam is also shored up with soil and other materials. Which yeah, is typical of beaver dams but is also typical of the structures in the original Caesar's village in the trilogy.

Unfortunately, there's only one image currently available of Eagle Village and it's after it was burned down. But you can still see how it differs from Caesar's village, instead of being chaotic it's more organized, allowing for a more lightweight structure.

This (below) is the closest I could get to having a picture of the dam's architecture, but you can still tell how it's more similar to OG Caesar's architecture than it is to Eagle Clan's, even though it's using a completely different building material (scrap metal instead of hewn trees).

Eagle Clan's architecture is also a further effect of how their society revolves around making a life bond with eagles, which are flying creatures. So of course they would be inclined to taller structures, especially ones that are more lightweight and have structural patterns, imitating the way that birds are built (see above).

I'll continue in part 2 as a reblog because it's 1 am and I'm running out of steam but YALL I need you to understand: It's been 6 years since the last time I had a Wes Ball film to overanalyze and rave about. I have SO MUCH to say about this film.

[hazyaltcare]

I've been wondering, do people not use the term "headmate" anymore, and if so, why? I used to see it go by all the time in system related posts and now that I've been realizing might be part of a system myself (still learning the terminology though) I think it might describe like. The other parts of me better than "alters" but if it's a problematic term I don't want to use it? I'm still very new to all this and I've been nervous to look into it because I've been in denial about it for a long time. If you can't answer that's OK! I'm able to do my own research too, it's just something I realized when I noticed I never see the term anymore it seems.

Hello, thank you for the ask!

Many people still use the terms "headmate" - but I do agree with you, it is rarer nowadays to see people using "headmate" as a catch-all. Nowadays, I think the common catch-all is "system member". It does not mean the word "headmate" has become offensive - it just means the plural internet users we see prefer other terms nowadays. I think it's a linguistic shift akin to English-speaking people using "genderqueer" as an umbrella term in the 1990s and 2000s, and "nonbinary" in 2010s and 2020s.

This is anecdotal, but I remember, just a few years ago, it was seen as more polite to use "headmate" as a catch-all in plural communities. Why? Because "headmate" is considered more neutral than "alter/part" (which have medical connotations) or "soulbond" (which have spiritual connotations). The use of "headmate" is not a jab against people who are more medical or spiritual, but it is usually preferred in large spaces where we can't know who uses which terms. It's like people using "they/them" as a default in queer/LGBTQIA+ spaces - it's polite, but of course, not every person prefer it individually.

(also, the medical and spiritual are not necessarily separate for many plurals)

Neither of the above terms is "problematic" - the only time it's problematic is if you use a term for someone, when they already said they don't want it used on them.

It all comes down to personal preference - what feels right to you (all).

Any plural is allowed to have label preferences. Some collectives can prefer "plural", some "multiple", some "system", others "collective", others prefer a combination (like "plural system"), and more. Same as individuals. Some prefer "system member", others prefer "part", some prefer "soulbond", others use more than one for themselves. Some prefer being called "you", others "you&" or "you+", etc.

(For example, I myself prefer "system member", "headmate", and "walk-in".)

So yes, you are allowed to prefer the term "headmate" over "alter". Anyone is.

If you want some plural resources that are inclusive of all more-than-one experiences, morethanone.info and healthymultiplicity.com are good places to start.

Best of luck and take care of yourself/yourselves in your discovery ❤️

Mod Vintage 🪞(DH)