#Butt catching

[sapp0w0]

>w<

[notbecauseofvictories]

thought I was entering a funk, thought that I was crawling toward rock bottom where even just replying to an email took Herculean effort, and my dishes would lie in the sink for eons to come or maybe serve as the breeding ground for a certain kind of obscure and fascinating bacteria---only to discover that I'd been drinking decaf coffee for the last two days.

[duckdodger]

SPOOKY SEASON

[dip-the-pip]

dans never beating the jealous allegations <///3

[merakiui]

fwb omegaverse leona on the mind.... nrc magishift team wins a game and there's a party at savanaclaw to celebrate. your best friend epel invites you along because it'll be fun (also if he's doomed to be caught by vil at least you'll be there to mitigate him getting chewed out when he sneaks back into pomefiore. T^T)

leona wants no part of it. he doesn't care much for parties or congratulations spoken on repeat, so he holes himself up in his room, intent on sleeping the night away. that aside, the party is lots of fun. there's food and drink. everyone's in a great mood. ruggie pops in to greet you, reminds you to have your fill and more. jack makes a brief appearance before he heads off to bed, determined to sleep at his usual time so he'll be able to get up for his morning run. you and epel are talking in between drinking. what starts as coherent conversation quickly spirals into fits of giggles over the most random things as you drink and drink: "oooh, vil's gonna have mah head if he finds out i'm here boozin' when i ought to be tucked away in bed!" and you laugh at him: "'have your head'? what is he, riddle?"

the two of you get swept up in the festivities and the whirlwind atmosphere. the night is long and loud. you're certain you'll have a horrible hangover come morning, but that's the least of your worries. epel asks you to get him another drink. you stand on wobbling legs, but the one he asked for isn't anywhere to be found in the coolers or on the table or in the spread of bottles. you wonder if there's any in the kitchen. yet for some reason you seem to forget what your task is halfway through because you pass the kitchen and find yourself exploring the halls of savanaclaw.

you're stupidly drunk, stumbling along. climbing the steps. it's when you're on the verge of falling over your own feet when someone's scent hits you head-on. it's so strong it almost shakes you from your inebriated stupor. standing at the end of the hall and leaning against his doorframe, arms folded, is leona kingscholar. and he does not look happy.

that doesn't seem to mean anything to you, for you smile widely at him and wave like a fool. he thinks you're awfully bold for creeping up onto his territory without your wits about you. not the smartest move for an herbivore, but then what was he expecting when you look ready to fall on your ass at any given minute?

to make a long story short, he looks after you. you spend part of the night in leona's room because the last thing he's going to do is send you off when you're so out of it. one thing leads to another and you kiss him because for once he's the one doing the nagging. not that you aren't strong or capable, but you're a drunk omega in a dorm with the highest population of alphas out of the seven (with octavinelle being second and diasomnia being third). of course he's going to worry. in any case, your kiss shuts him up. maybe he's still steeping in the exhilaration of a win. the team played well. he's proud. or maybe he just feels like he ought to do something before you start making a fool of yourself and drawing unnecessary attention.

he holds your face in his hands, tells you not to start something if you aren't going to finish it, and you grin at him, inhibitions abandoned. is that a challenge? if so, you'll gladly play. you kiss a few more times. hands wander. it would've gone further, but then leona catches epel's scent on the stairway, approaching. he hates to be interrupted, but maybe this is for the best. you're not in the right mind.

he brings you back down to the party, epel trailing behind, and a few noses twitch in his direction. people wonder... leona shuts them all up with a stern look. he instructs one of the few betas who hadn't been drinking to escort you and epel back. ruggie offers in his place, knowing it'll get him an extra something off of leona's credit card. leona shoos the lot of you away, content with this arrangement. weirdly, he falls back into bed (which smells faintly of you) and he's kept awake. so much for a good night's rest.

the next time you encounter leona it's in the botanical garden. he perks up at your scent, shaken from his nap. you arrive with a purpose, holding out the sandwich he likes from the cafeteria as a peace offering. leona wasn't expecting much and it takes a lot to truly surprise and impress him, so he's both when you make your bold offer: casual sex. you remember the night of the party. mostly the kissing. actually, that's the clearest memory you have from that night. ;;;; you enjoyed it and wouldn't be opposed to an arrangement like that. on weekends or something... whenever's best. he doesn't have to agree, but you make a tempting offer. who is he to say no?

he takes the sandwich from you, a smirk sprawling lazily on his lips, and he says, "not a bad offer, herbivore. as long as you know what you're gettin' into, i don't mind a little fun."

tl;dr: omegaverse fwb with leona, but feelings sneak up on him. and casual sex starts feeling less and less casual with every moment spent with you.

[seaquestions]

baseball really is so charming to watch sometimes especially when the guys are all yippee and yahoo about their big hits

[crybaby-bkg]

Bakugou is adamant about not doing anything for his birthday. He does this every year, and you usually do something for him anyway, something small. You might have a picnic or go hiking with him or just stay in bed watching his favorite movies.

He doesn’t want to do anything for his birthday ever. And this year, you respect his wishes.

When he wakes up, he expects streamers and balloons to litter the room. Maybe you walking in half naked with a tray of breakfast for him. He expects something, even though he’s adamant about having nothing. So he’s a little….surprised? Disappointed? When he wakes up and has…nothing.

Bakugou gets up and pads into the kitchen and is greeted by a regular sight—you sitting in your usual chair with a warm mug and scrolling through your phone. You perk up when he enters though, smiling at him, getting up from your seat as you hand him his protein shake. You kiss his lips gently, whispering against his mouth,

“Good morning, my love. Happy birthday.” And continue on with your normal routine. Bakugou blinks, surveys the kitchen once more, looks over the counters and peeks into the trash can. He figures you must’ve made him another one of those big birthday breakfast’s, but it’s still the same regular breakfast you always make.

The rest of the day goes on like that. Everyone treating him as they usually do on his birthday—overwhelmingly and annoying, and he hates it a little more than he usually does. Were you upset with him? Did he do something the night before for his birthdays festivities that he never wants to be canceled?

He perks up when you text him, but it’s just to ask if he wants chicken tonight instead of fish. He almost breaks the screen on his phone when he replies chicken.

By the time Bakugou gets home, he’s irritated beyond all hell. Yes, he knows he told you how much he didn’t wanna be celebrated today but that didn’t mean to do this. To do nothing. He takes a few breaths before he unlocks the front door, sighing as he enters with his head down, immediately kicking off his boots.

“Happy birthday, handsome!” You shout when he enters, making his head immediately whip up. He’s shocked at the sight; you standing in the middle of your living room in that one outfit he said he loved the most on you, with orange and black streamers and balloons decorating the space. The lights are dimmed and his favorite song is playing (the one that blasted on the speakers the night he took you home after your first date), there’s an assortment of food on the table, and what looks like a homemade cake in the middle. He’s frozen at the sight, and is only pulled out of his stupor when you pad over to him and bring his face down to yours.

“I know every year you say you don’t want anything for your birthday, but I couldn’t help myself. Is this okay?” You ask gently, cupping his cheeks, smudging the soot from his skin. Bakugou stares down at you with the softest look he could muster, smiling gently as he pulls you in close to him, kissing you hard until you both lose your breath.

“It’s perfect.” Bakugou answers simply, pecking your forehead as he pulls you in close until your nose is pressed against his collarbone. You take in his scent before sighing, pulling away as you pat at his chest.

“Good. Now go take a bath so we can eat and open your presents.” You nod to the back of the house, going to pull away but Bakugou squeezes you tight to him. He looks at you, seriously, and it almost worries you, before he whispers softly into the air,

“I love you.” His voice sincere and sweet, and it makes you smile so hard your cheeks burns. You peck him once, twice, before speaking against his lips,

“I love you more.”

And after that, Bakugou doesn’t dread his birthday as much. Not if he gets to spend it with you.

[dookieboy1999]

ok but this cake must've been so good though... couldn't focus on homelander's Heinous actions bc i was thinking about it the whole episode 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.98 Honeymooners

If last night was any indication of how our year would be, we were in for an incredible ride. I couldn't think of a better way to ring in the new year than pleasuring my wife. The woohoo was so good; we were still stunned well into the next morning. I awoke, feeling foggy, wondering if last night had been a dream. When Sophia came down for breakfast, I didn't even know what to say to her and we ate in silence with this amazing secret looming over us. Eventually, her voice broke the silence, and we began to recover from our drunken-like stupor.

Tartosa was a gorgeous city, and I didn't question how it became the number one location for weddings. From the beaches and shopping to the beautiful landscapes and architecture, it had everything one could want for a perfect wedding. Unfortunately, we married too early in the season to appreciate all the amenities. Not only was it the first day of the year, but also the first day of spring. Looking out at the ocean from our patio began as a delicious treat, but became an evil tease. The water was too frigid to enjoy, and it rained all day. We were both looking forward to spending lots of time at the beach and were disappointed about canceling our main activity. Well...main activity outside of the house, that is. But at least we had the hot tub. It wasn't the same as the ocean, but Sophia had fun with it.

I too had fun playing in the water, heh.

Tartosa gave us another dark, cloudy, chilly day, so we spent the morning and much of the afternoon in bed, talking and playing. What we had between us was more than enough fun, but it would be a shame to spend the week in that beautiful city and not see it. Around dinnertime, we dragged ourselves out of bed and went out. Every corner of the city seemed to be carefully designed as if they wanted us to take selfies everywhere. It's no wonder why it became the wedding capital of the world.

We tried to eat at this nice restaurant we stumbled upon, but they had a very strict dress code. We didn't feel like being fancy, so we went back home and cooked together for the first time! Well, I cooked. She read the recipe. Either way, I loved doing that with her.

The next morning, the soft pitter patter of rain lured me out of my sleep, and I groaned at the idea of spending yet another day inside. I chuckled at how ironic it was that I originally looked forward to spending three days in this very room with Sophia, but now felt trapped. It's not that I tired of her presence, but simply knowing outside was not an option made me anxious.

The mattress felt more level than it should have, so I rolled over and saw Sophia was gone. That's when the faint buzz of the TV downstairs grabbed my ear. Taking advantage of the alone time, I pulled out my phone to do a little scrolling before joining her. I received a message from Dub asking me to call him because he messed up, so I did. I thought maybe they had a fight or something because he slipped up and said something about Maia and Chi Chi, but the real story was much bigger than that. They had just found out they were expecting! Joy overwhelmed me, and I was just about to offer my congratulations, but the fear and panic in his voice stopped me. He didn't call to spread the good news; he needed help to make sense of that reality. Their relationship was so new, it still had the tags on it. Like Sophia and me, they began dating and moved in together within a matter of days. Even though I knew Sophia was the one, if I had gotten her pregnant back then, I would have panicked too. I felt for Dub, but he didn't have all the complications I had. He'd always been 100% positive about his feelings for Maia even when he didn't realize it. I believe the only reason he hesitated in the beginning was because he so desperately wanted to be with her. A baby might not have been the next item on the agenda, but it was definitely on the list. I drew from that to encourage him.

It amused me at how different our parents were, though. He was concerned about what they would say, especially her dad, who allegedly threatened him with bodily harm. My parents would have rejoiced if I had announced they would be grandparents. My dad might have had concerns, but I wouldn't have been afraid of what he'd say. I'd probably run to his house and ask him what I should do, just like Dub did with me. I did my best to encourage him, letting him know that everything would be alright, and he sounded like he was in a better state by the end of the conversation.

I'd been sitting on the bed in my underwear the whole time and realized I was cold, so I put on the onesie Sophia got me for Winterfest. I smiled when I found her wearing hers. Tartosa's houses were gorgeous, with their spacious, open windows and arches that clearly catered to the warm climate.

Dub's phone call weighed heavy on my mind, and I wondered if Sophia could be pregnant. I stopped using protection at her behest when we got engaged, and we've certainly had plenty of opportunities to make it happen. But how would we know? Do we just randomly decide to take a test one day? Wait until it's obvious? Knowing how anxious Sophia was about starting a family, I put it out of my mind because I knew she'd be on top of it. I had a bigger question in my mind, anyway.

When Dub mentioned fearing Maia's father, I felt oddly weird. That was the first time it really occurred to me I didn't have in-laws. I mean, of course I thought about it all during the wedding, the parties, and even the planning, but I thought of it more in terms of her not having parents to celebrate her. I never considered what their absence meant for me. Every couple had a huge llama in the room, and that was ours. Whenever she talked about them, she kept it brief and vague, and I could sense something missing in every sentence. I didn't want to start any trouble, but I had to find out what happened. It was the perfect day for it. We had no plans and were stuck inside. I hoped she was ready to talk.

Links take you to collab posts on @mysimsloveaffair's blog.

[lazybakerart]

keefe’s arc for season four is going to be asking the gemstone family for kelvin’s hand in marriage.

[softquietsteadylove]

Here to say I’m missing Thenamesh Rus AU and this is in fact a prompt 😅 (sorry I have two brain cells and neither of them are working to formulate a real prompt but I appreciate anything u give us!!!)

Gil strolled through the crowd. He was coming off watch duty, although now that winter was over and spring was approaching, it wasn't quite so agonising. Even so, he was still volunteering to cover Thena's watch when at all possible for her.

He only relented when Thena herself insisted on him staying inside and resting in the warmth of his room.

The humans called it Maslenitsa, or some form of it. They were celebrating, and the sizzling of hot cakes could be heard all over the place. People had cast iron out over the fires, flipping the fluffy, sugary confections.

"Hot cake, Strong One?"

He tilted his head at the offer. There were plenty of other fires making hot cakes, and he had to admit he was curious to ask about how the technique and recipes varied between them all. But this one was already being held out to him; it seemed rude to ignore it. "Oh, uh, thanks."

The woman smiled, leaning on her knees and resting her chin in her palm. "You and your merry band should enjoy Maslenitsa. The nights will become shorter and the sun will be strong."

"That's good," Gil murmured, even looking up at the sky to admire the colour of it. Thena could do with a little more sun, after all. He chewed the hot cake. He thought it could do with a finer grind on the wheat they used, but it was tasty (hot butter and melted sugar would, of course, do that for anything). "This is good."

"It's a newer technique, the old ones don't always add the sugar," the woman smiled, flicking a long train of dark hair over her shoulder. "But I quite like to try new things."

Gil took another bite; the sugar did a lot to add to the light texture, he thought. Surely adding only butter would just be eating a flat biscuit, or soft hardtack.

"Where is the Warrior?"

Gil blinked, surprised she was asking. But he supposed he was rarely without Thena. Many of the people in this country had light yellow hair--more here than anywhere else they had stayed. But Thena's hair was the envy of many of them. It was great hair. "We all shift the responsibility of looking out for trouble. I'm sure she's around here somewhere."

"I see."

Gil licked his fingers finishing off the cake. "Thanks--it's-"

"Have another."

He was going to refuse politely. There were more he could try if he wanted to. But she was already extending another one. His insides squirmed. "Well, okay then."

"The attacks on our walls are lessening," the woman continued to make light conversation as he ate. Her eyelids fluttered and her lips pursed faintly. "Will you and your ilk disappear again?"

Gil thought about his words. They had been here long enough that most had accepted that they were part of the royal party, as it were. It was a sign they were assimilating effectively if people didn't think of them as temporary presences. The more they could muddy the waters around their connection to Deviant attacks the better.

Greece was all but convinced for three whole generations that Thena had fallen from the sky like an angel from the moment Athens was built. Most had forgotten that they had simply showed up one day.

"Your presence would be sorely missed."

Well, that was nice of her to say. Gil mulled on things with his mouth full of hot cake. What to say? They would, in fact, disappear sooner than later. "Uh, I guess we'll see what the Queen decides."

"Of course," the woman lowered her eyes. Sankta Olga's rule was beyond question, after all. She peeked at him coquettishly. "Would you like to know how to make the bliny?"

Apparently that was the hot cake sizzling in butter. He was curious. "Hm, I-"

"There you are."

Gil's face broke into a grin, "there you are--been looking for you."

"Is that so," Thena purred in a funny tone. She let him pull her closer to him, but her eyes were on the stranger. That was common for the Warrior Eternal though.

"Warrior," the woman curtsied to her.

"Have you had these?" Gil asked, gesturing with the half-finished hot cake in his hand. In truth, he had eaten this one slowly, wondering if he might find her and let her have the rest of it. "They're pretty good."

Thena observed the cake briefly before eyeing the woman again. "Tempting, are they?"

The woman shrank back some, letting more than just the fire separate them. Gil wasn't sure what had spooked her, but he held up the cake for Thena to try. "I think you'll like them. Try it."

Thena dragged her eyes away from the woman. She looked at the cake, but ultimately moved his hand out of her way, albeit gently. Her hand remained clasped around his larger one as she smiled, "I shall."

His eyes slid closed as she raised her lips to his. It was a simple peck at first, but she lingered, waiting for further access. Her tongue slithered past his, tracing around his mouth for the hot butter and syrup lingering there. His other arm came up to wrap around her waist completely.

"Hm," Thena moaned pleasantly. She leaned back, licking those perfect lips of hers. Her eyes had a mischievous sparkle in them, "delicious."

Gil blushed, although the woman had needed to look away from such a display.

"I quite like it," Thena added, continuing on as if the kiss had not occurred. She looked at the woman who was now too embarrassed to look at either of them. "I would like one as well."

"O-Of course, Warrior," the woman stuttered, her earlier smoothness and charisma leaving her. She handed over a fresh one from off the iron.

Gil swept it up into his free hand. Thena looked at him, pouting cutely. But he grinned, "it's hot. I'll hold it for you."

Thena rolled her eyes at his chivalry; it was not as though she were human, she could hold something as hot as that. It was no raw, molten iron straight from the fire, like he could. But she allowed it, bending her head to take a delicate bite of her fresh bliny.

He took a bite of his remaining one to finish it off. He raised his brows at her, curious if she wanted the last of this one straight from his mouth, but she shook her head, taking his arm and leading him away from the mortified human.

"You must get better at perceiving when women are hinting at you."

"Hinting what?" he asked. He thought he was pretty good at reading people, actually. He could read a room, he was quite sure. Maybe sometimes a few things might go over his head, but that was what he had her for--to watch his blind spots.

Thena just smiled, dusting some crumbs out of the fur on his shoulders. Soon, they wouldn't need to be draped in furs all the time. "Had I not arrived when I did, I do believe she would have asked you to sample more--the way I did with you?"

He furrowed his brows; that seemed impractical. But oh!--she meant the woman was trying to flirt her way into his arms! She was right, he was terrible at picking up those kinds of signals. He pouted right back at her, "you know I don't pay attention to how mortal women communicate that...stuff."

Thena must have been feeling the good weather. Rather than glare at him, her energy crackling and sparking in her palms, she let her amusement show. She ran her hand down his chest again, tilting her head to peck right at the corner of his lips. She pulled back, licking her lips again; he must have had crumbs there. "Indeed."

He chuckled; if she was happy, then he was too. He nuzzled the tips of their noses together, "sorry, Solnyshkuh."

She sighed cutely, feigning some maidenly distress. "I suppose it is not your fault you are so desired."

"Hey, speak for yourself," he grinned, continuing to lead her through the festivities with their arms wound together. "I witnessed several proposal attempts at that last ball we went to."

She laughed. "Those entertain you as much as they do, me."

That was true; they always had a good chuckle about it later. "And will you laugh about this with me later?"

Thena eyed his lips for a moment. "Later."

Fine with him, she could stake her territory all she liked with him. He would resign himself to it happily.

"I would like to know how they make them," he murmured, looking around at the various other offerings of bliny and flatbreads and cheese.

"I'm certain you need only ask," Thena also looked around them. Several women waved at them; she scowled again. "Perhaps the royal cook--the old one with the moustache."

He chuckled again. He tilted her chin back to him, using her good mood to sneak yet another kiss. "Whose am I?"

She lit, like the sun itself. "Mine."

"Whose?" he repeated, kissing her cheek as reverently as a goddess deserved.

"Gil," she laughed, chiding him lightly, although it came out airy as he tickling below her jaw with his teeth. "Mine."

"All yours," he swore, even canoodling in the middle of an open market. "Besides-"

Thena drew her brows together at his significant pause. Although they shot up as he snuck his hands under her heavy cloak to give the behind of her dress a pat.

"Your hotcakes are still the best."

"Gilgamesh!"

[doodle17]

Maybe if i actually post about (at leas two of) them I'll get asks

[ashtonsunshine]

If you can love a crater covered moon, you can love your cellulite covered ass.

[anotherpapercut]

I know several people who like LOVE seasons 5-7 (11th doctors run) and think the storylines and moffats writing are brilliant and I don't get it!!! what am I missing??? why does literally every single episode have the exact same stakes: Rory/Amy/the doctor is dead. forever. so dead. but wait!!! what if they aren't!!! why do so many of the explanations for why they're not actually dead feel so rushed like they were added at the last minute!! why does every single queer character act kind of weird and awkward about being queer!! why does the doctor casually say that women are inferior when no one's around!!! what the fuck!! hello!!!

[connortheconceded]

3 easy steps to become a cool werewolf

step one: dubiously consent to some experimental procedures.

step two: inhale a mix of wolfs-bane, dried belladonna and other components with just a little cocaine mixed in for good measure.

step three: wait 5 to 20 minutes for the body to painfully transform itself.

And its as easy as that, now go out have fun!

[frozenartscapes]

Legendary!Edelgard, approaching the other Edelgards sitting at a table: What’s wrong with her?

Fallen!Edelgard: *muttering under her breath, arms crossed as she glares across the courtyard*

Student!Edelgard: Oh. She’s just grumpy.

Brave!Edelgard, scoffing: When isn’t she?

Student!Edelgard: Did you not hear the news? There’s another one of us. They just summoned her today.

Legendary!Edelgard: Another? I did not think there were many more worlds to pull from. But why is she so upset over this one?

Holiday!Edelgard, prancing by: Hello! It’s so wonderful to be here! Isn’t it just incredible, all of us here together to share the warmth of the season! It’s just like back home, with all my friends and family and wonderful people. Well, I should get going - lots of people to make merry, after all! Happy holidays to you!

Legendary!Edelgard, watching her go: …Ok now I see it.

Student!Edelgard: Hang on… Family? Are her brothers and sisters still alive in her world?!

Fallen!Edelgard, flipping a table: Goddess dammit! First the beach one and now this?

Beach!Edelgard, offended: Hey!