#But yeah bro really does need a break from this 😭😭😭

[strebcr]

Listening to himself talk, even Streber thinks how weird this treatment has become normalized for him. To be fair though this shouldn't be normal at all and it isn't! It's bad enough Ophelia had to probably hear about what happened that Halloween through some stranger in town. It's not even really a secret, that's the sad part. One Google search of Streber's name and what happened with Bob has been unfortunately click baited to hell and back. Most of those articles and videos weren't even made with any consent from Streber at all. When serial killer cases in small towns happen, the moment it gets just a small bit of clout, it's always seasonalized to hell and back, without any regards to the victims living or dead or their families.

Streber shouldn't be dreading April fools day as much as he does. But people if people showed any ounce respect or boundaries things would be a different story. Once a story gets just a little bit of internet clout, people treat you more like a fictional character then an actual person just trying to move on with life. Streber was just seen another name on a long list of victims, that's it! It's shitty that a bunch of strangers on the internet who never even knew he existed before this in the first place, get to decide if he should be treated like an actual person or not. Hell it's shitty that people he's known in this town for YEARS at this point treat him like some kind of sideshow.

Streber snapped himself out of those thoughts before they ended up just eating his brain from the inside out. "I-I mean if you want we could do some stuff together here. I could always use the company, my cats like you, and I know a bunch of bad horror movies and musicals to watch! This way you can keep your vaseline and it'll be a good way to pass the day. If you don't want too though I understand!"

Yeah maybe company could take his mind off things! Distractions are good, and who better to get distracted with then a friend, right!?

Sets a bottle of Vaseline on the table in front of him 'They can't do the sick joke if they can't grip their doorknobs to leave the house'

"Oh, you don't have to do that. I'll be fine, I deal with this every year for awhile now.... There's really no need to worry about me, I can handle myself! B-But I really do appreciate the concern."

Streber was a bit surprised. Not in a bad way though. A few of the neighbors have shown concern for him around this time, since the moment he got home from the hospital. Streber hated when people worried about him however. This wasn't anyone else's problem to deal with but his own! No one else should be dragged into the problems he deals with via assholes in the town. No one else deserves that burden.

[meganegatari]

Bro I literally eat up ur writing every time😭can u do ellie using a vibe on u?

before you read.

☆: KILLING 3 BIRDS W ONE STONE HEHE. i feel these all go well, so why not. sorry for the insane wait, and the wildly lazy writing...me putting this off forever only to bang out a crappy blurb in like 2 mins...also can't stick to a single aesthetic WHATEVA.

◇: vibrator use, fingering, porn w/out plot (sawry), dom-ish ellie (but she's still kinda silly), overstimulation, squirting, aftercare at the end (all r! recieving).

"you can take it, doin' so good." she murmurs under her breath, her face contorted in concentration.

you squeal when ellie presses the vibrator hard against your poor, overworked clit, the sensations almost too much to bear. but no matter how overwhelming it may be, it's still so mind numbingly good. the device has been set on a mode midway for the past...however long, and you've completely lost count of how many times she's made you cum thus far. for all you knew, it could have been well into the double digits, and she didn't seem to be stopping any time soon.

ellie’s eyes were dark, low with blown out pupils. they remain trained on you, flickering between observing your facial expressions, your squirming body, covered in a shiny layer of sweat, and what's going on under her hands. "...ellie, hold on...wait." you gasp out, struggling to catch your breath.

she detaches the device from you, her tattooed hand traveling up your body, settling on the side of your face to cup your cheek, and wipe away a stray tear that had escaped from your eye. "need a break, babe?" she says, her gaze softening. that honey voice she puts on, featuring a light domineering timbre, it immediately makes you wet all over again and you whimper quietly, bucking your hips up in pursuit of more stimulation. she notices—of course she does, observant as a fox—and her lips stretch into a sneer, "yeah that's what i thought, still need more." she chuckles, before thrusting the tip of the toy back onto your swollen clit, biting her lip when she watches you arch backward, mantras of her name and pleas falling from your lips.

her free hand, which was previously resting on your knee, flies down the inside of your parted thighs, grazing the heated skin, and she teases your hole with two digits, eagerly observing the reactions. she quickly stuffs her middle two fingers inside with ease, slick and pearly cum leaking down her slender knuckles. curling upwards to massage your g-spot, the pleasure is causing explosions of colors to appear in your vision, your eyes are filling with tears once again.

"just gimme one more, okay?" ellie orders gently, clicking buttons to increase the intensity of the vibrator even more, and you nearly shriek. out of instinct your legs fight to close around her hands, but she's quick to push your knee to the side again, tutting. "nuh-uh, don't do that. just one more. say the safeword if you really want me to stop, alright?" you open one eye and nod meekly at her, and she resumes. within no time at all you feel the brink of orgasm swell in your lower abdomen once more, your legs trembling at every purr of the toy. and she can tell as well by the way you're whining and panting, all with a fucked out, lazy smile playing on your face.

silent moans trapped in your throat, you feel the blinding ecstasy overtake your body, blacking out your senses for a moment. she has lessened the setting to work you through it effectively, all while muttering sweet praises throughout.

"god, look at that." she whispers in awe once it's over, discarding the device on the floor and rubbing her hands across your legs to ease the tension in your thighs, making sure you're okay. she hovers over you to press a tender kiss to your forehead, then over your entire face, grinning when she hears you laugh.

her goofy tone returns, "fuckin' squirted all over me, baby. we'll clean up just gimme a sec." she cuddles up to you, nuzzling her face in the crook of your neck, sighing and softly stroking the top of your head. "next time we'll do a couple more, make a new personal best, whaddaya think?"

tags (idk why some didn’t work): @andersonfilms @ch6douin @aouiaa @sapphic-ovaries @astro-cat2 @paqerings @r3starttt @littlefallenangel111 @srooch @sinfulprayerss @lvlymicha @sunnsh1ine @anniee333 @flowrmoth @liddysflyer @fortune777 @claude999 @brunaedn @lanabaezzzz

[hanjisungslag]

attack on titan headcanons #10

synopsis: how the characters react when you, their s/o, gets hurt. 🩹

characters involved: eren, mikasa, armin, jean, connie, sasha, reiner, bertolt, annie, levi, erwin and hange

notes: i am cooking up a storm, so watch out for that & also hit double digits!!

☆ eren jaeger

bro is INFURIATED

“WHO DID IT HUH?! ILL KILL THEM WITH MY BARE HANDS-”

oh.. you got injured in training? poor babyyy☹️

he’s super sweet and gentle with you.

if anyone tries to go near you though.. he’s super scared they’re gonna accidentally hurt you😭.

so he’s always at the edge of his seat ready to rescue you if needs be.

he gets all of your food, water, clothes, bandages etc.

then the nurses catch him doing it and have to YANK him off of you, once again.

☆ mikasa ackerman

so incredibly caring and concerned 🤍

she was the one who found you on the expedition with a broken leg

she refuses you to the hospital

lets the nurses do their jobs (thank god)

she really wants to be able to help nurse you back to health as well though..

she gives you the next best thing aka massages.

she literally comes in everyday and gives you 3 massages minimum a day

she’ll also sleep in the hospital with you most days.

☆ armin arlert

nothing less than an angel.

for however long you’re in the hospital, he’ll bring you flowers

in there for 3 weeks? new flowers every week.

in there for a week? new flowers every other day.

reads you books every night to help you sleep

sleeps there EVERY single night

always gives good morning and good night kisses

keeps you updated with what’s going on with everyone and training to make sure you don’t miss out.

makes sure to surprise you by bringing your friends there too!! it was a super sweet surprise.

when you’re sleeping, he goes around asking nurses if they need help😖.

☆ jean kirstein

UGH TERRIFIED FOR YOUUU

he has to hype himself up before going to see you in hospital because it just breaks his heart.

but being able to see you, hug you, know that you’re being taken care of makes him feel wayy better.

he’s just happy to see that you’re not too badly injured.

just a sprain from training!

he likes to draw things for you from the outside

or you guys draw together.

yk that cute game where one person draws a squiggle and the other person has to make into a drawing?

yeah, you guys do that. and it’s frickin adorbs😡

☆ connie springer

you went to do some late night training by yourself

and cornelius found you on the ground. in a lot of pain.

he rushed you to the first aid

fastest anyone has EVER seen that man run

you got cleaned up but had to take a break from training until you were better.

definitely tries to make you laugh all the time

even with your injury, he still wants to see you happy and smiling 🤍

☆ sasha braus

aw bless her cotton socks.

your injury wasn’t fatal enough to warrant a hospital stay

but the nurses said to stay home and rest up!

you had to take care of your scar

in her own time, sasha headed over to first aid to ask the nurses how to help you properly☹️.

you literally do not lift a finger!!

she does everything for you, like cleaning it up, wrapping it up etc.

and she’s really good at it and all…

☆ reiner braun

he’s like a scared little boy.

he’ll sit by your side and tell you it’s all okay

but when he’s alone.. HE GETS SO UPSET

sometimes he’ll take ‘bathroom breaks’ just to pull himself together because he hates seeing you in this state :(.

really affects his everyday life

but he hides it well.

BIGG celebrations as soon as you’re out of hospital

is literally like a servant, will get you everything and anything you want.

☆ bertolt hoover

GAH SO ANXIOUS!!

he bakes you cookies for being so brave☹️.

he stays with you all day long until the nurse finally tells him he has to go.

it breaks his heart leaving you but he gets up bright and bloody early to see you in the morning

like i’m talking the second the hospital opens up.

☆ annie leonhart

she’s not nervous,

your injury wasn’t fatal or anything.

she’ll still visit you, of course ;)

she also makes sure to tell you how brave you are

since you are scared of hospitals.

she’ll giggle at your wimpy-ness though.

like you were getting patched up and you were just like trying not to scream

and she was just standing there chuckling at you.

☆ levi ackerman

so so so scared, secretly.

he has lost one too many people

but to lose you? that would completely and utterly BREAK him.

it was a pretty gnarly injury as well…

which was rather terrifying for both you and him

but he’ll keep a cool persona around you.

if he’s unable to visit due to work, he’ll ring the hospital and asks how you are.

he’ll always make time to come see you though, no matter what!!

☆ erwin smith

he hears from his assistant that you’ve been put into hospital

he runs STRAIGHT over and makes sure to comfort you.

he’ll stay till dark when you’re asleep and pay the nurses a visit too

he asks them to take extra good care of you.

if he’s unable to see you, he makes sure to call you up every single day

or at least have SOMEONE come check on you.

☆ hange zoë

GAH!! FREAKS OUT!

hange has seen it all at this rate

but doesn’t seem to heavily affected.

they’ve never really had anyone close to them be extremely injured

they were sooo scared though :(.

it was really sad for everyone to see hange’s energy so low but

they couldn’t help it!!

all they could think about was their poor love in hospital :(.

when they’re around you though, they try to stay positive! and tells you all about their work to keep you both distracted.

[cheeseceli]

Helping you recover from a surgery

Pairing: ot7 BTS × Gn!reader (individually)

Genre: fluff, reactions

Request: BTS x s/o who had to have surgery and is trying to recover with their help

Warnings: mentions of food on Jin, Jimin and Taehyung's; body insecurities on Taehyung's; non sexual nudity on Jin's (barely there though)

A/n: low-key can be read as "they take care of their sick s/o" as well | daily click

Jin

‌You're literally not allowed to move a single finger

‌This man is ready to do everything and anything for you

‌Even the nurses feel a little bit useless when they see him because bro is really doing everything already😭

‌And with that I mean he's helping you move from a room to another if you need, he's giving you food, he's helping you shower and so much more

‌Really just wants you to rest for now

‌And he's so light-hearted while doing that

‌You'd never feel like a burden during this time because he never shows he's tired or stressed with the situation

‌He does everything with a smile and poor jokes, and you just know he's glad to be able to be there for you

Suga

‌The best one when it comes to making you distracted

‌Even if you can't do anything besides laying down on bed, you'll barely feel bored with him there

‌Always has the most out of pocket topic to talk about

‌You truly don't know how his mind works but you're most definitely not complaining

‌Also watches all the dramas you wanted to watch with him before but had no time back then

‌Will do his best to not be bothered by work things as he wants to be focused on you

‌Would even block his manager's contact if that helped💀

‌But if he truly needs to work (and with that I mean TRULY needs), he will do it when you're sleeping

‌If he's working on new songs, might even write a song for you during this time

J-hope

‌Bro was stressing when you were in the surgery😭

‌Talking with every doctor he could find and pacing around the hospital all the time

‌But when the time comes to talk to you after the whole process he just puts the biggest smile on his face

‌ He's honestly relieved to see you well

‌The good thing is that meanwhile he was panicking outside, he was also studying about what he should do once the surgery ended

‌He is almost an especialist now

‌The doctors are trying to give him advice and then he's like "oh yeah I know that, but you didn't mention this"

‌He's lecturing the doctors now

‌Summing up, you are in very good hands, don't you worry

Namjoon

‌He is kinda scared of messing up tbh

‌I see it as in a scenario where you haven't even got sick on the relationship yet, so a surgery is a big change

‌Of course, he wants to take care of you

‌And he will do his absolute best to help you

‌But he's kinda scared of making you feel useless as you really need to rest

‌And he'd hate to end up patronising you a bit or something like this

‌So he ends up helping you mostly in subtle ways

‌Where things are still done for you but not too noticeable, so you wouldn't feel like you're burdening him or something

‌And he would also take a break from work

‌No matter if the company is knocking on his door, he has his priorities set straight

Jimin

‌You were still under the effect of anesthesia when you woke up, so you were a little confused as to why your room was full of things

‌Turns out Jimin got a little bit too excited when buying you gifts

‌So now you had a lot of your favourite sweets, a lot of different flowers, some teddy bears and God knows what more

‌He got a little embarrassed later but at least you liked it lmao

‌And he'll be sure that your favourite family members/friends got to visit you at least once

‌He'd be threatening your family so they would visit you lmao

‌If your relationship is public, he'd even show Armys comments wishing you a healthy and fast recovery

‌He's doing everything in his power to make you feel as loved as possible

Taehyung

‌Basically moves into the hospital

‌He's happily sleeping on the couch like that's where he lived his entire life

‌And when it's time to go back home, he's still with you

‌If you guys didn't live together back then, now you guys do

‌Either it's on his house or yours, he doesn't care, he is going to be glued to your hip

‌And although he doesn't like the fact that you are kinda ill because of the surgery, he loves to take care of you

‌He will cook for you, help you change clothes, will make your bed as cozy as possible, he's basically trying to make you feel like you're on a cloud all the time

‌After you're healed, if you are insecure of your new scars, he will most definitely reassure you of them

‌He still thinks you are beautiful, maybe even prettier now

‌The type to kiss your scars😔

Jungkook

‌Panics a little part 2

‌Like, he panicked once you told him you'd need to go through surgery

‌But after it I think he'd be alright

‌There was probably enough time for him to plan what he needed to do and to let the information sink in

‌He would try to make it as "playful" as possible

‌Doesn't want you to think of this as a problem, just something that happened

‌But the moment you complain about pain or something he's dialing his doctor

‌And he will do EVERYTHING for you and to you

‌Almost the same to Jin when it comes to wanting you to rest

‌Overall he is a bit lost but determined to make you feel as good as possible

Masterlist | you'll probably like: when you struggle to eat (read with caution)

Thank you for reading <3

Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @butnotmontana @lelewright1234

Dividers by @saradika-graphics | images 1 2 3

[concretecultist]

Sunshine (muscle memory pt. 2)

summary: "true love never leaves, sometimes it just gets lost temporarily. lost in pride and ego, lost in confusion and misunderstanding. but love being lost is never the end; sometimes love needs to breathe before it finds home again."

word count: 17.6k

pairing: reader x noah sebastian

warnings: angst, talks of mental health, feelings of guilt, mentions of marijuana usage, crying, dad!noah, FLUFF

THIS IS PURE FICTION AND IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY!!!

A/N: yeah so idk how to write short stories really 😭 so this is a long one!! Please make sure to comment and reblog as it helps us writers out immensely!! Much love!

~Berry🫐

“You’re so full of shit!,”

Matt had come back into town, rushing to tell Noah and the guys what had happened while he was out. Noah, Nicholas and Jolly were playing a video game on the big screen when Matt rushed in, Folio nodding in and out of sleep with a bag of chips in his hands after facing a whole blunt by himself.

“Bro, I know what I fucking saw,” Matt was seething, does Noah really think he would lie about something like this? “This wasn’t some Y/N doppelgänger, it was Y/N and she had a baby, a little girl.. who looks just like you might I add. It’s weird!,”

Noah felt like his stomach fell out of his ass. Matt has to be bullshitting. Maybe you were babysitting? There’s no way you had a baby. There’s no way he had a baby.

“It’s hard to tell who babies look like when they’re still that young. Maybe the guy who told you to go away was her new boyfriend,” Jolly tried to justify.

Matt frowned at Jolly’s disposition. Everyone in this room knew you like the palm of their hands. It took you a while to open up to Noah and become his girlfriend and even longer to open up to them to consider them playfully-annoying brothers.

“She’s not like that,” Nicholas clicked away at his controller, brows furrowing as he soaks in the conversation.

Matt clapped his hands and pointed to Nicholas as if to say that the point he made was based, and it was.

Nicholas continued speaking while keeping his eyes trained on the screen, absolutely obliterating the characters within the game, “I mean think about it. If what Matt is saying is true-,”

“And it is!,” Matt interjected but all Nicholas did was roll his eyes and continue speaking,

“-Then the time between Noah and Y/N breaking up versus now, would not be enough time for her to get pregnant by someone else,”

“One night stand after they broke up?,” Folio answered absentmindedly.

“You know damn well that’s not how Y/N is,” Matt just wanted to pull his hair out, “If you saw that baby then you guys would see I’m not lying,”

Noah felt like he might be sick. Even if you two broke up, you would tell him that you were pregnant… right?

But then again, the last few months of your relationship, he wasn’t there, emotionally nor physically so he can’t blame you if you didn’t. It doesn’t hurt any less though and he doesn’t know what to believe.

“Where the hell did you even see her? I figured she jumped ship,” Noah shrugged, “And even if this is the case, Matt. She blocked all of us on… o-on everything so how do you expect me to go about this?,”

The silence from the blond was enough of an answer for Noah but Matt’s silence didn’t mean he didn’t have one.

“Why are you so adamant on denying this?,”

“I’m not!,” Noah let his character go idle long enough for Nicholas to say fuck it and actually pause the entire game, “I just don’t know what to do! I mean, if she acted like she didn’t want to see you then what makes you think she’ll want to see me?,”

The guys knew Noah had a point, but he should still try.

“It’s Sunday. Every other Sunday she goes to the markets and you should know that because you would always be at the studio with Jolly so she would take me with her,” Matt stood there with his arms crossed, he watched the gears turn in Noah’s head but he knew the brunet still wasn’t getting it.

“Okay?,” Noah was stumped.

“Which means she still has her routines, dork!,” he tapped his fingers to his temple as if to tell Noah to ‘fucking think’

“Meaning on Wednesday, she’ll be at the actual grocery store getting what she couldn’t at the market,” Nicholas answered for Matt.

“Are we sure any of this is a good idea?,” Jolly probed, “If you guys ended mutually then one, why would she not tell you, two, why would she block all of us, and three, why would she act like that when seeing Matt?,”

Jolly, Matt and Nicholas had their suspicions about the breakup. Noah had told them it was pretty cut and dry but they could never get your side as you pretty much went off the grid.

“I don’t know!,” Noah held his hands up in frustration, “I don’t know why you guys are acting like I’m not blindsided here,”

“There’s only one grocery store within the town I saw her near. Don’t be on any stalker shit but I’ll bet you my fucking mixing equipment she’ll be there on a Wednesday at 4:45 before the after work rush comes,” Matt refuted.

It felt strange to Noah that all of his friends seemed to read you like a book, but when he thinks about you, you seem like a mystery. Maybe it’s because you had no choice but to become one after a while. It’s his fault you closed yourself off. You tried until you couldn’t yet Noah made your efforts seem pointless. Noah had neglected you, he became a stranger who wasn’t involved in your routines anymore and he’s had more than enough time to realize that after you left.

When you left it felt like his world had stopped. How did he fuck up so bad? Letting the voices in his head get to him, pushing you away with the idea that you’ll someday be with someone who deserves you. The demons in his head convinced him that he wasn’t that someone.

He let the weight of the world crush him. He let the brain fog cloud his vision, his judgment and now here he is, doing his best to get better. Now has the news that he may or may not be a father. He’s spooked by the idea. If he couldn’t be a good partner how does he expect you to let him in for a chance to be a good father… if he can find you that is? He’s petrified.

Except he knows damn well it doesn’t outweigh the panic you felt when he pushed you away, forcing you to go through it all alone.

It had been about two and a half weeks or so since your run in with Matt and it has done nothing but prompted you to stay inside more than you already have been. Reid agreed to drop off your needed items and even stuck around to help around the house. He’s even brought Ms. Ernie by as she’s missed you.

You wanted to get out though. You missed going on walks around the woods, missed stepping foot on the outskirts of the city. You couldn’t hide away forever and you really couldn’t do that to Noelle, she needed to see the outside world.

That’s how you found yourself in the supermarket in town with Ms. Ernie as she asked you what you wanted for dinner.

“I think some mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli will be good sides,” you suggested.

“Want gravy?,”

“No, I’m more of a butter and pepper kinda gal,” you lightly nudged her, patting Noelle’s bottom as she laid quietly in her baby wrap against your chest.

“You kids don’t appreciate good gravy anymore,” she playfully rolled her eyes.

This is something you really needed. Was this a friendship you expected to have? Absolutely not, still it helps you feel normal. You share your eggs from your chickens and she makes you milk and yogurt, she always invites you over for Wednesday dinner, you invite her over for a nice cool lunch while she’s on break from the truck.

“What do we want for dessert?,” you ask, looking at the array of fresh baked goods.

“Pick whatever you want, sweetie. I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go look at the teas, I’m running low and I think they’re on sale!” she waved, taking the cart to go get her favorite brand of iced tea.

“What are we feeling, Sunshine?,” you lightly bounce, her hand reaching up to feel your cheek, “Do we want carrot cake, red velvet? Ouuu that caramel crumble apple pie sounds gooooood,”

You look at her, heart swelling while she just squeals and smiles at you. You never expected yourself to be a parent, a single parent at that- but smiling down at this face, with the cutest, chubbiest cheeks and big, animated eyes, you wouldn’t trade this for anything.

“I know, I think we should get all of them too,” you rub your nose against hers just to hear her babble again. You would never get tired of that sound, it became your favorite song.

“But!-” you open the cooler door and begin reaching, “-Mama is really craving the red velvet,”

Unfortunately for you though, it was on the top shelf and you just weren’t tall enough. You hear yourself grunt as you reach and honestly it’s rather embarrassing. You try again and see no one nearby to ask for help and you feel defeated. All you wanted was a nice piece of cake. Deciding to give up, you slap your hand down against your thigh and look to Noelle to pout at her, “I guess it wasn’t meant to be”

While you were looking at her, you were in your own world. Everything just seemed to stop when you peered into those eyes. Noelle nuzzled her cheek against the back of your finger as you caressed it. All you wanted was a nice dinner followed by eating cake while she slept on your chest, a nice night with you and Ms. Ernie competing against each other while watching a game show.

You were so caught up in adoring your daughter that you didn’t see the large hand that reached over your head to grab the cake you desired.

“Here you go,” a hopeful drone made its way into your ears.

You were so set on having a good night except when you looked up, your smile immediately fell and you were frozen. Your eyes seemed to deceive you because there was no way this was real. You had to be dreaming. There’s no way he’s standing in front of you.

Your body betrayed you. Everyone speaks of fight or flight and a part of you always believed that if you were in a situation where you had to choose, that you’d choose flight, not being the fighting type and opting to always run and hide. But… Now that you’re in a situation like this, there’s a third option many don’t acknowledge.

Freeze.

There’s fight.

There’s flight..

and then there’s freeze…

And you froze.

Your mind and body let you down. Your feet should be carrying your body as far away from his as possible but you just can’t move. You’re trying but they won’t budge.

That smile he shines isn’t helping either. It's an expression you want to wipe off his face but for some reason you can’t help but continue to stare because it’s a smile that you never expected to see again. It clicks that your mind is betraying you again because why are you finding comfort in it?

His eyes were tired but still so beautiful. You notice they hold hope as well as hesitation.

“You always did like red velvet,” he snickered but you didn’t find anything funny. What kind of sick joke is this?

“Get away from me,” you whisper. It sounded more confident in your head, you didn’t want to sound weak. Another bodily betrayal.

“I’m not here to scare you or hurt you. I just want to talk,” he caught a glimpse of the gorgeous baby in your wrap and his breath was taken away.

Matt was right and not just about the baby. But your routines. You never strayed far from your habits, so to see you walking in the store with your baby to your chest made this much more real than Noah could process at once. The poor guy doesn’t know if he’s relieved or scared shitless.

“There’s nothing to talk about. She’s not even yours,” your eyes flit as the tears fall down your cheeks. It felt like you were suffocating now. You know Matt spilled and really, you couldn’t blame him because if you were in Noah’s position, you’d want to be told as well. But then again.. you wouldn’t be in this position if you were him because you would’ve tried to save your relationship.

Being found so easily wasn’t something you planned and now you’re battling the feelings of wanting to slap him or run in his arms because while he hurt you- Noah was it for you. He was endgame. Seeing him stirred all these feelings inside that were now giving you vertigo, causing your stomach to swirl and a lump to form in your throat.

“Y/N, she looks just like me. There’s a lot to talk about,”

He tried to get another glimpse but you shielded her in the wrap. No, no way in hell. Taking a giant step back, you hold her closer, “I won’t let you take her away from me. She’s all I have, Noah. I won’t let you,”

Noah took a step forward and could only brandish defeat when you took yet another step back.

“I’m not trying to take her from you,” Noah knows he has no right to be offended. Like, let’s think- you two broke up and his best friend bumped into you, now Noah knows about his child and he found you in a random supermarket after you fought tooth and nail to stay away from him. It would make sense why you think he’d take her from you, but that’s far from what Noah wants. It’s a long shot but he wants to make this right.

Noah understands that he fucked up in the past but he wouldn’t do that to you, “That’s why I want to talk. I want a chance to be there,”

A scoff from you echoes in the empty aisle. How rich.

“You weren’t even there for me and you expect me to believe you’ll be there for her?,” You grit through your teeth, “She is too precious to be let down by you, Noah. Do it to me all you want but not when it comes to my daughter,”

A frown etched its way onto Noah’s face, waving his hands as if to say ‘wait, hold up’. He knows he hasn’t been there but he’s not about to be some deadbeat.

“Our… daughter,” he corrected, “You didn’t even give me a chance to know so I could be there,”

“You’ve got some fucking nerve!,” your voice had gone shrill and you were thankful that there was little to no people in the store. You wished he would have approached you outside, then you really wouldn’t have to worry about keeping your voice down.

“ ‘Our’ daughter, Noah? Really?! If you weren’t there before I was pregnant-,”

“I told you I just needed time,” he interjected, still holding onto that sentiment.

“I gave you four years!,” you spat, “Four years of me, Noah. I gave you four years to learn how to love me. To learn how to communicate even up until the end,”

Who knows how much time he would have needed. Who knows if he’d have even gotten his shit together by the time you found out you were with child and gave birth. Having Noelle now, you know for certain you couldn’t have just sat with idle hands.

“Y/N please,” he begged, still holding the cake in his hands, “I love you and I fucked up. It’s been killing me since the day you left and how I never had to chance to make it right, then Matt told me-”

“Matt is wrong. Matt doesn’t know what he’s talking about!,” you really weren’t trying to make a scene here and you were still trying to convince Noah that Noelle wasn’t his.

“She has my eyes, Y/N. She’s a perfect mix of you and me. Please, just, can we talk about this over coffee. I know you don’t owe me anything but can we meet for lunch or something?,”

Before you could answer with a fat ass denial, Ms. Ernie is coming up with her noisy cart, scooting along with a small frown on her face.

“They done moved my tea, I had to ask for help,” she frowned. She was never the type to like asking for help in stores, she liked it when things were easy to find.

She moves to stand beside you, waiting for your response but then she notices the look of shock you’re wearing and meets Noah’s eyes. It took her a second before she gawked, looking to Noelle and back to Noah.

“That’s that baby’s daddy!,” she looks over her glasses and you loudly sigh at her statement. She didn’t always read the room well.

“Ms. Ernie!,”

“Sorry, honey but it’s undeniable,” she shrugs, looking back to Noah, “You gonna put that cake in my cart or just stand there looking pretty,”

Noah stammered before rushing to set the cake down in the cart and turning to you. Words seem to catch in his throat, not exactly sure what to say.

“I know you blocked us all on everything so just… reach out when you’re ready. I really would like to talk about all of this,”

“I gotta go” Looking to Ms. Ernie so that she would get the hint to start walking. You knew you were in for a long night of her lectures, no matter how insightful they always were, you weren’t ready.

You had a feeling for how the night would go now. This feeling had your stomach queasy as if you’re on a boat, feeling the waves rock you to and fro. It was hard to face the music but she was going to make you. That’s just how Ms. Ernie was, you just weren’t ready for her to be right about it all.

“Give him a chance, sweetie,”

Noelle was fast asleep while you leaned on Ms. Ernie’s shoulder, eating your cake and watching Wheel of Fortune. You wanted your night to go just like this but it wasn’t enjoyable, not with all that was plaguing your mind.

“I can’t let him back in,” you think about it, recalling how bad it hurt you the first time around, “Now that Noey is involved, I can’t let my guard down. I’m a mom now, I have to protect her,”

“I’m not saying throw your whole hand in,” she sipped her tea, “Have a drink with him. I can call Reid to help me with our cute lil plum,”

It wasn’t a secret to how badly you were emotionally wounded when you and Noah parted ways, but it also wasn’t a secret to Ms. Ernie just how bad you love him. From the day you met her, she claimed you and Noah would find your way back to each other. You always told her it was a fat chance. Even now, your heart was playing tug of war.

Do you stay away? Leaving him to wallow in his bad decisions? or do you lean into the possibility of mending things?

“I never stopped loving him, that’s why I’m scared,” you sit up to look at her, she looked so noble when looking at you over her glasses like that, “I watched him love me less and less until our love just became an empty shell. I watched him pick his job over me and I can’t put her through that,”

Ms. Ernie reached over to wipe your tears when she caught sight of your trembling chin. It was comforting, like a grandma tending to her grandchild while they experienced a melancholic mood.

“Take it slow. Take time to get to know the new him and he can take the time to get to know the new you,”

“Does he deserve that though?,”

“Mmm,” she shrugged, “Sometimes a lot of good can come out of a second chance. What if you and him were meant to part ways, only so you two could find each other again?”

“Love shouldn’t come to that, no?,” a twinge of confusion worming its way into your tone

“Oh honey. You’ve got a lot to learn about love,” she lightly swatted your leg, “No amount of time and space can separate you from those that are meant to be in your life. This is a second chance to create a new story,”

You called it. You knew she was gonna get all philosophical on you and be right about all of this.

“Don’t rush into it but…” she sighed, “Give it a shot,”

You don’t even know if you were strong enough to lift the metaphorical gun to give it a shot. Pondering her words each bite at a time while you finish your treat, how do you go about this without immediately falling in love with him again? He was so easy to love even when you didn’t want to, even in his faults. One look at him and it felt like the first day you met him.

You were standing at the bus stop one day, sighing at having to take public transportation as your anxiety has been in overdrive since your car was in the shop. Public transportation meant a lot of people in close quarters and you just couldn’t handle that right now.

In the midst of your mind being in a flurry, a group of rowdy men are approaching. You’re too caught up in trying to reduce your apprehension to notice them getting closer until a nameless man bumps into you, knocking your token out of your hand.

Watching it fly from your hand, floating in mid air, all you can do is try to catch it but it just wasn’t your day. Your token falls down the street drain and your gasp causes the rowdy group to stop.

“No! No, no, no, no noooo!,” you fall to your knees and look down the drain to see the token shining up from the bottom. It was mocking you.

“Dang it!,” your head falls in your hands, wallowing in embarrassment. The token station was 9 blocks away, there was no way you’d make it there and back in time. Of course the transit app wasn’t working on your phone either, you’d been telling yourself to get a new phone carrier for months now, now look at you.

“I’m… so sorry!,”

Removing your head from your hands, your eyes move in the direction in which the voice came. Your breath is instantly taken away once again but for a whole other reason.

“I can pay for another token,” he offers, helping you up, his large hands grasping your biceps to get you up right.

“No it’s okay I can-,”

“Please. It’s the least I can do,” the tall brunet insisted. Your words are caught in your throat, eyes trying to drink in his beauty before he becomes only a memory.

“Nice going, Noah!,” a tall blond wearing a hat pushes him.

“Watch where you’re going, asshole,” another chuckled, he was also decked out in tattoos, gorgeous black hair and glittering eyes.

But your eyes were on the inked man in front of you, the one who made your day even more of a rollercoaster than it already has been. While his friends make fun of him, your eyes are tracing over his tattoos, you’d never seen so many on one body in person before.

“Is… is that a Garden of Eden reference?,” you point to his neck.

He touches his throat and chuckles, a noise that you weren’t aware would change your life.

“Yeah, yeah it is,”

“It’s nice,” you mutter, afraid to speak above a certain octave. You don’t talk to people much, you were only a lonely librarian who went to work, staying in the basement all day to organize books and then go home.

“Thanks…?” he trails off but points to you ask if to ask you a question

“Y/N,” you spill out, “M-my name is Y/N,” you anxiously stick out your hand for him to take and shake, “I think he just called you Noah?,”

“Yeah that’s me,” his smile… my God his smile was hypnotizing. His smile could cure all sadness

“You owe me a bus pass,” you point out, “A-and… and I can pay you back over a cup of tea and some fresh scones at my favorite bakery downtown,”

Your confidence not only caught him off guard, but you as well. You’d never suggest something like that to someone and now you’re overthinking the fact that you’ve made such a fool of yourself.

“Sorry that was… that was abrasive and demanding. That was so rude. Y-you were just being nice and I just… you’re just so pretty and oh my God… Y/N shut up-,”

“Hey,” he softly talked over you, wanting to calm you down without scaring you.

“We’ll stick around until the bus comes so I can pay for your pass and we can trade numbers to set up a date for those scones,”

A date… a DATE?! You’ve only ever been on a handful of dates before and they all went terribly. Surely he didn’t mean like… a date-date, right? Like, you’re sure he just meant a little meetup so you could actually pay him back.

“O-okay!,” wide eyed, you nod your head and look around to his friends that are smiling and laughing and you don’t know if they’re laughing at you. It’s okay if they are, you’re used to it.

“Don’t mind them. They’re assholes,”

“We are not!,” a shorter man punches his arm, “I’m Nick by the way, but you can call me Folio. That’s Jolly, Nicholas, Matt, Davis and Bryan!,”

You nod to them all, making a note of their names.

“Y/N,” you sputter, “I’m Y/N,”

“We heard,” Jolly smiled.

“Right,” you give a bashful smile and turn from them to sit on the bench, “The buses are running 20 minutes late today so you really don’t have to wait,” you set your book in your lap.

“I insist. If these jerks are in a rush, they can go without me,” Noah throws a hand back at them. He’s not surprised that that’s exactly what they did.

They left Noah there, giving you two the chance to talk about the most random things, like your favorite book genres to read, things on your bucket list, aliens, paranormal shit. Just fun things. This is the most you’ve talked to any stranger you’ve ever met, you don’t even talk to your co workers like this.

Noah let you yap about your interests, he admired the way you animated your speech with your hands. He was absolutely enamored with the way you bounced in your seat when he brought up a topic that excited you and he made a mental bookmark so he could memorize the way your eyes close when you laugh.

Noah didn’t believe in love at first sight but this felt like it.

While discussing your favorite twilight characters, the noise of the approaching bus pulled you from your conversation, Noah can see how your face dropped. Your conversation went by too quickly.

“We can have more conversations like this,” Noah shows you his screen, displaying his number and you curse to yourself, knowing he can see you shaking while you hurry to type it into your phone. Your heart was beating out of your chest, he is so sweet and so fricken cute and his tattoos are so cool and he just sat here to talk to YOU?! No one ever just talks to you.

He’s even nice enough to help you onto the bus and get you seated before saying his saddened farewells to leave you. His demeanor gave off reluctance and you felt like you were in a rom-com when he stood outside the bus, waving as it began rolling away.

Your face was hotter than hell, there’s no way any of that just happened. Your phone felt heavy in your hands, demanding to be opened. Gnawing at your lip, your fingers dance on your screen, trying to figure out what to say.

You went with a simple text, something quirky. Something that you hope he’ll answer to and not ghost you after the way you opened up to him so easily.

“So… about those scones?”

All those memories flood back and you can feel the dampness of your face. Where did that Noah go?

How did your once grey world that become so colorful so quickly with his presence, fade into grey once more with his absence in the blink of an eye?

What happened to him that he became so detached? What was lying beneath the surface that he let fester until he let it impact your relationship?

You feel Ms. Ernie takes the plate away from you and rests her hand on your cheek, pulling you out of the pit you were digging with your overactive questioning.

“I got the spare bedroom ready for ya, go get some rest,”

Taking her advice, Noelle snuggled into you as you carried her to the spare room where Ms. Ernie had set up a spare bassinet. You had tucked her in, making sure she was safe and secure before plopping down on the bed with a large sigh, heels of your palms pressing into your eyes to subdue your flowing tears. Now that you were alone, the weight of everything came down.

Tired of feeling so scatterbrained, you grabbed your phone, tapping away at the screen to have your thumb hovering over his name. Was this a good idea? Do you give in this easily? Would this be healthy for your mental state right now? Maybe Matt was right, this wasn’t about you, this was about Noelle, she deserved her dad, right?

But what about protecting her? You didn’t want to introduce him into her life just for him to turn around and jump ship when things got too hard.

Here goes the vicious cycle of overthinking and all the possibilities that made themselves known with the heaviness, giving you no other choice but to feel it filling up your chest. How soon did you want to do this? Did you even want to do this at all?

You’ve been blaming yourself since that day at the market. Had you gone earlier like you always do, you wouldn’t have bumped into Matt, or if you had paid attention, you could have avoided him. There were so many outcomes the universe shuffled in its hand and yet the card you were dealt was the situation you were facing right now.

Finally having enough of your own inner dialogue, a deep breath escapes you when clicking on his contact, closing your eyes when hitting Unblock Caller

Just like the day you met him, you’re faced with the challenge of what to say, except this time there was nothing cute or quirky to say. It was simple and serious.

Tomorrow 12pm at the bakery downtown.

That’s all you could come up with before pressing send. It’s almost like he was waiting by his phone, waiting for you to reach out and it makes you kick yourself. What if this is a set up and you’re falling into his plan.

Wait, no.

Noah has messed up but, He wouldn’t do that… would he? He wouldn’t hurt you any further. You hope you’re right because now this is happening.

I’ll be there.

Sleep fought you all night. In and out of sleep to either tend to Noelle or simply because your mind wouldn’t power down for the night. When you were finally able to get some shut-eye, it was like it was already time for the sun to rise.

Ms. Ernie had breakfast ready for you after you fed Noelle, scooting around her quaint kitchen humming the tune of a classic she grew up listening to. Your nerves were bad as you thought of the day ahead.

“So, what are your plans today?,” she questions.

Slowly chewing your food, your eyes avert down to the table. Why do you feel so embarrassed to admit that you’re meeting him today despite her calling it?

“I uhm, I was going to ask if-,”

“Yes. Reid is already on his way,” the elderly woman delivered a smug expression, she’s been on Earth long enough to know how young love works.

You chuckle at her and shake your head, “You don’t even know what I was going to ask,”

“Baby, I can read you like a book. You’re gonna go see him. I could tell before you went to bed last night. We’ve spent enough time together for me to know you’re not over him,”

Knowing this fact made you feel an ounce of shame. You should be over him. He showed his ass last year yet you’re not sure if the alarm bells that are going off in your head are due to actual warning or if they’re sounding off because you can’t seem to do anything other than overthink. It’s a terrible habit and an even more terrible predicament to be in.

“Am I jumping into this?,” you rub Noelle’s back absentmindedly, enjoying the weight of her in your arms to ground you. Maybe you should have given it a couple days. Did it seem desperate to message him so soon? You were supposed to hate his guts

“It was going to have to happen at some point, dear,” she shrugs while cleaning the kitchen, “You’ve left some bricks of milk in the freezer, you’ve left some spare bottles, diapers, all that. With Reid here to help me she’s in good hands times 2,”

Almost as if she had summoned him, Reid knocks and enters through her front door, a bright smile on his face that you’ve come to learn really helps calm you down. You were thankful for the connections you’ve made since being on your own.

These people were your village and you were in good hands, meaning Noelle was too.

“Gooooooood morning!!,” he claps, hugging Ms. Ernie before moving to you to steal a piece of bacon off your plate. Reid hugs you as well, taking Noelle from your arms.

“I can’t forget you, sunshine!,” he holds her up in the air and she screams in excitement, dropping her head on his chest when he pulls her in.

Ms. Ernie could tell your nerves were getting the best of you, it’s happened enough times to know that spaced out look on your eyes.

“Finish eating and get ready. You can take my car,” she scoots around the kitchen to set her keys on the counter.

“I can call an Uber” not wanting to impose

“Nonsense!,” she waves her hand with a frown, “Your car is back at the cabin, my car doesn’t get much use cause I always take my truck. It’s not a problem,”

Reid sits beside you and rubs your back as a means of comfort, it’s written all over your face that you’re distraught, you never did master your poker face.

“Hey, you got this,”

You drop your head on the table and can feel the tears welling once more.

“Am I stupid for letting him in so easily?,” the familiar knot was forming in your throat, warning that tears would soon begin to fall if you didn’t pull yourself together, “He literally told me he didn’t love me like he used to, then last night says he never stopped. It’s hurting my head. I went about year without him and now I’m going to meet him and I’m terrified,”

“Y/N,” Reid began, “How do eat an elephant?,”

You turn to him and frown at his question. But this is Reid, you know he’s about to say something corny.

“How?,”

“One bite at a time,” he comforts, “It’s okay to feel nervous. It’s okay to overthink all of this and it’s okay to think about the cons. But what if this turns into something good?,”

“It was supposed to be something good the first time,” you hiccup. It’s just tearing you apart all over again to think about what could have been if he’d tried harder back then. You could have been a happy family instead of going through this.

“But then I guess I wouldn’t have met you guys,”

“Exactly. Everything happens for a reason,” Ms. Ernie interjects, “But if you get back with him, you better not forget us,”

Her words were jaw dropping, you know she was saying it as a joke but there was a twinge of truth in them. You all have gotten so close and it would crush her if you left and never looked back.

“I would never dream of it,”

You arrived at the bakery an hour early. Your thoughts wouldn’t slow down unless you did and your nerves were on fire the closer it got.

Maybe this was a bad idea. No… this definitely was a bad idea, right? This bakery brought so many memories. What kind of self torture is it to recommend meeting at the place you two had your first date?

It’s 12 now and he’s still not here. Your chest starts to ache and you don’t know if stress is the cause or if it’s because you knew this was too good to be true.

The reality of having a baby scared him off. He wasn’t ready to be a parent. He’s a big shot rock star, sitting here with the realization made it click that he’s not ready to give that up. He loved his job too much.

It was now 12:06 and there was still no sign of him. You weren’t going to text him, he shouldn’t need a reminder, especially because he never followed up today.

Exhaling mournfully, you gather your belongings, standing up to leave when you hear the bell to the front door and heavy, pattering feet-

“I’m here!!,” panting, hands on his knees as he gets to the table, “I’m here! Accident blocked off the highway- had to take a detour- sped here, no parking. Had to park 2 blocks away so I ran,” he slid into the booth, running a hand through his hair to calm down.

His face was cherry red, chest rising and falling quickly, he looked beat. You don’t say a word, you just slip him your water and he whispers his gratitude just as he chugs it, taking a napkin to wipe his mouth.

“I don’t have her here with me,” a monotonous tone leaves you.

He nods, taking a second to compose himself, trying to get his heart rate down so that he could have a calm conversation.

“I expected that,” leaning back in his seat, his eyes settle in on you and you start to feel self conscious, “You’re still as beautiful as the day I met you,”

“Noah,”

“No, I know I fucked up, Y/N. Trust me, no one knows more than me,” he leans his elbows on the table, dipping his head to catch your eyes that way you can see he was being honest, “I’ve kicked myself in the ass ever since then,”

“I can’t just let you back in, Noah,”

“And I don’t expect you to,” his hand comes to his lips, pressing on them as he thinks, “Everyday I thought about you and what I could have done better. I have therapy now, I learned better coping mechanisms. I know that’s something I should have done before I got that bad, but I didn’t just do it for you I did it for me because I wasn’t treating myself the nicest either,”

Maybe you should have taken a page out of his book and gotten help, but with being a single parent, you didn’t really have time for that.

“I loved you and I still do. You said that you probably weren’t the one for me but you’ve got it so wrong,”

His words reverberate off the walls of your ear canal. This is why all of this is confusing. If he was going through something mentally, why wasn’t he honest instead of shattering you to pieces?

“You’re just saying that because there’s a baby in the picture,” you accuse.

“Ask Matt… ask Nicholas even. This has been going on since the day you left. Finding out about our daughter only solidified it even more that I want a life with you,”

There’s no way this is genuine.

“Noah, I can’t just trust y-,”

“I know. You set the pace, I will respect that,”

There.

Those words started to chip away at the walls that you’d built up. They must not have been very thick, or very strong. Or maybe Noah just had that ability.

“Do you… can I see pictures of her at least?,” He asks as if he’s nervous almost, “I get it if you don’t want to I just-,”

A part of you wanted to tell him no. You didn’t want to reveal her to him just yet. He should work a little harder to prove that he’s legitimate in his stance. A few words shouldn’t grant him this opportunity. Nevertheless, your iced out attitude began melting at his expression, showing him a couple pictures wouldn’t hurt.

“No I can,” you open your phone to your camera roll, having a whole album of her. You’ve taken pictures of her since the day you had her. She’s a beautiful baby and you suppose he could see pictures of his own child, he’s missed out on enough, hasn’t he?

“This is when she was born. I did a water birth,” you show him a picture of you holding her, umbilical cord still attached, “My medical staff was great,”

Then you slid through the album showing him other pictures absolutely adoring your daughter and how cute she is

“This is the first time she smiled at me,” you look at him and you can see the sparkle in his eyes as he stares at the screen. There was a gentle smile on his lips, registering in his mind that this little human was a piece of him.

“She’s a sweet baby. Doesn’t really cry, she’s a squealer when she laughs,”

You play videos of her giggling and babbling and he is instantly in love, seeing this look on his face stirs a guilt inside of you that you never felt before. Maybe he should have known. Things could have been resolved by now had you not been selfish.

But there’s that nagging little voice telling you that you deserved to be selfish at least once in your life. It felt like your mind was in a blender.

“What’s her name?,” he looks to you hopefully. Were you ready to give him that information? It’s silly but the more he knows, the easier it will be for him to tear down the walls you built around yourself. It’ll make it easier for him to weasel his way into the picture again and you weren’t sure yet if you wanted to keep this a co-parenting arrangement or what.

“You don’t have to tell me right now,” he sees the hesitation on your face.

“Noelle,” you answer softly, “Her name is Noelle. I named her after you. But we also call her Sunshine, Plum or Noey, that one’s new,”

He broke out in the brightest smile you’d ever seen. You missed that smile, those beautiful lips framing his beautiful teeth. It was a smile that once brought you peace that is now bringing confusion.

“That’s…,” he gives a breathy chuckle, using his fingers to press into his eyes to keep the tears at bay, “That’s lovely,”

“Yeah, look at who her mom is,” you flip your hair as a joke and suddenly the tension isn’t as heavy. You’re supposed to be icy right now but the hopeless romantic within you is fighting the broken-hearted girl. One could only guess who is winning.

“Yeah, exactly,” Noah is seen getting nervous as the conversation progresses, he doesn’t know what questions are off limits, “So what are you up to these days? You’re not at the library anymore,”

“You looked for me at the library?,” you frown. You left that place a long time ago.

“I sat out on the bench everyday for at least three months before we had to leave for tour,”

Why couldn’t he give you that energy before? Where he used to meet you outside on the bench after you got off, sometimes with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, and sometimes with your favorite take out and you’d have little date nights on the library bench. Why did that flame have to die?

Was life about to present you with new, better tools? Improved ways to bring it back? To make it a raging forest fire that can’t be put out? A lover like you can only hope.

“I work from home. With finding out about Noelle I needed something relaxed, I’m still in the field of library science. I work as an analyst,”

His eyebrows perked up, just like the first time you two ever met when you told him what you did for a living. His interest now was a big 180 from last year.

“Y/N that’s.. that’s amazing,” he leans forward, prompting you to talk about it more. You go on and on about your job, about how cool it is to you and he sat there and listened. Not once did he break eye contact, he interacted with the conversation and it felt like things were how they used to be.

“How’s the Bad Omens life?,” you ask, finally getting winded from talking about yourself.

Noah plasters a look of pride on his face. You wanted so badly to keep up with them but that would do you a disservice while trying to mend what was hurting you.

“It’s great! We’re blowing up, so many more places we can tour now, merch sales are off the hook. We have a new one dropping soon and I uh… I designed one for Noelle, I’ll just need her size,”

His words caught you off guard. How does he have something planned for her already?

“Noah,” he’s got you swooning so easily. This was your Noah.

Snap out of it, Y/N!

If he’s serious, make him work for it.

“I think it’s pretty cute! Nicholas and I brainstormed on it together, it’s a Bad Omens x Noelle exclusive,”

The laughter that escaped you was a melody Noah thought he’d never hear again. When it dies down, his mouth begins to itch with a question he’s been wondering for a long time now.

“Are you,” he clears his throat, “Are you seeing anyone?,”

Your eyes flicker at his question, adjusting in your seat. Snatching the cup of water that was on the table, looking him in his eyes when you set it down after a sip.

“I told you,” tongue in cheek, playing with your fingers to ease your mind, “I wouldn’t be able to fall in love with anyone else. You were it for me,”

You search his eyes, wanting to cry for the sole basis that you never thought you’d see them again. They were the eyes you looked to whenever you were desolate, excited, or livid. No matter what you were feeling you could simply look at him and he was always there, until he wasn’t.

“I meant it when I said I loved you and you fucking sat there and told me that you didn’t love me like you used to,”

“I don’t know why I said that-,”

“It gutted me,” anguish covers your face like a mask, trying to keep yourself from crying while that night replays in your mind like a movie, “You just sat there like it didn’t even hurt you,”

“It hurt me like you wouldn’t believe,” he persisted

“So why didn’t you try?,” your lip hurts from biting it so hard, if you don’t stop it’ll bleed soon enough, “I gave you so much of me, even up until I couldn’t, when I had nothing left and you just… sat there!,”

“I was an idiot,” he admitted, “I fucked up when I decided to love my career more than anything. I messed up when I let it weigh me down,”

“I don’t care that you loved your career, Noah. I cared whether you showed up for us or not. You did until you became complacent,”

“I know I didn’t,” he answers, “I know I didn’t try hard enough. I know I gave up too quickly and those decisions have been haunting me every fucking day. I know I made this bed but I don’t wanna lie in it anymore,”

Taking a napkin from the table to wipe your eyes, you look around to make sure no one is looking at you. You thought in your mind that you’d be stronger but deep down, you expected the tears even though it’s embarrassing to be this emotional in public.

“Were you even honest with everyone or did you make me the villain?,”

“I told them it was mutual,” he confesses in shame.

Choking on your sobs, you shake your head and just look out the window, “So you made them think I just skipped town? That’s so fucked up, Noah. I would have never done that to you,”

“I will tell them the truth,” He panicked, “I don’t know why I lied to them I just… I knew they’d make the guilt worse and I figured the damage was done. I knew if they knew the truth they’d make me reach out but after that I didn’t have the right to reach out to fix it,”

There’s a silence that floats between you two after his words. The culpability of hurting you ate at him while the heartache gnawed away at you.

Both were parasites feeding on their hosts. Ruining their lives, doing their best to reduce them to nothing.

The parasitism ends here though.

“If-” you hiccup, gathering your things, “If you want even a sliver of a chance of being in Noelle’s life… of us getting back together, of us being a family… then you’ll start with being honest with our friends,”

Noah was so anxious that he just might throw up. He wanted you back and he didn’t want to miss out on having a family. He’s missed out on enough due to his own transgressions.

It took Noah a few days to muster up the strength to tell everyone. Every time he tried, he stumbled over his words and gave up. He had to do this though, it wasn’t fair to lie on your name to save his face.

Noah found himself with the guys, all gathered for game night. Snacks spread out all over the table, Folio was high, laughing while throwing a squid at Matt on the course, fucking up Matt’s winning streak. All of them were having a good time but Noah couldn’t focus on having fun, what he was about to confess wasn’t fun by any means. After a few rounds of Mario Kart, he paused the game and sighed, many groans of dismay being heard around the living room.

“What’s your problem?,” Jolly questioned, “I was about to whoop your ass on the Bone-Dry Dunes!,”

Noah felt his breathing pick up. It was now or never.

“It wasn’t mutual,” he blurts out, heart racing in his chest, he can hear his blood rushing in his ears.

“The fuck are you talking about?,” Folio burps obnoxiously loud and Bryan kicks him for being gross about it.

“Y/N and I, the break up wasn’t mutual,” he finds his switch controller a lot more interesting than the feeling of their eyes burning holes into his skin.

“Again, that begs the question… what the fuck are you talking about?,” Matt’s voice sounds strained, like he knows and is getting irritated with the suspense.

“Before she left. I told her that I didn’t love her like I used to. I got overwhelmed with the band. I was… I got deep in my head and started to self sabotage. I neglected her and I fucked up,”

A stillness dresses the air, Noah can feel the tension. He can’t bring himself to look up and see their expressions, he’s ashamed, he should be. How did he go so long with this secret? How did he go about his life knowing he broke the trust of one of the sweetest souls that walked this Earth?

“Woah…,” Davis muttered in a daze. His single word response was enough to have all hell breaking loose.

“I’m going to kick your fucking ass!,” Nicholas threw his controller at Noah, heat from his frustration reddening his cheeks, “Are you fucking kidding me, Noah? Is that why she ran off?,”

“That’s exactly why,” he nodded, cursing at himself. He feels so embarrassed to say it out loud. This is the first he’s ever admitted this outside of therapy. These are people that mattered, people whose opinions mattered the most.

Matt sat up like he’d seen a ghost, a light bulb moment happening for him, “That’s why she didn’t tell you about the baby,”

“BABY?!,” Folio screeched, “where the fuck was I?!,” Hands stuck out as if to gesture “wtf” Folio was always ten steps behind everyone else, even when he was in the room at the time of conversations.

“You were super high, you passed out,” Jolly waved at him to shut up, turning to Noah, “You’re our brother which means I have to be honest. That is a dick ass move, Noah. She was nothing but patient with you. She loved you, supported you even when it was hard because you were gone all the time. What the fuck?,”

“She was always there no matter what you needed,” Bryan added, while it took a while for you to open up to everyone, when you did, they became your little family, “She was always there for you, always there for us,”

“I miss when she packed our lunches for the studio,” Folio sighed like he was daydreaming. Once again finding it hard to read the room.

“Not the time!,” Nicholas gritted through his teeth

“I’m just saying!,” Folio defended, “She took care of all of us,”

Nicholas stuck out his hand to shut Folio up. If there was anyone up in arms about this, it was him. They all became your family and it hurt them when you left without a word. Now that he knows the full story, it makes him livid to know it was Noah who pushed you away. This could have been avoided.

“We were worried sick about her, Noah!,” Nicholas was more upset than any of them, and that’s saying a lot, the others were quite upset, “That girl who stuttered over her words the first time she met you still stuttered after years of being with you because she loved you, because you still made her nervous! After years of being with you she was still smitten and because of the stress.. you… y-you say that shit to her?,”

Noah really had no rebuttal. He knew Nicholas was right. There were no words for him to defend himself with. It almost brought him to tears, unsettled by his own behavior and now that other people know… now that the people closest to him know- it changes everything and forces him to reflect even more.

“Instead of talking to her, talking to us to keep you from doing something so stupid- instead of doing.. anything! You pull a coward ass move!,”

Nicholas viewed you as if you were a younger sibling, taking you under his wing, understanding your reclusive personality. He was the first person you connected to outside of Noah. He had a feeling when he only ever got vague answers when asking about the break up.

“It was time I was honest. I want to make this right with her. I want a chance to see my daughter and be a dad but it starts with honesty.” Noah mumbled, “I just want her back and I want a second chance whether I deserve it or not. I want to be there for Y/N like I always should have been. I want to be there for Noelle. I’m sorry it took so long to come clean.”

“Yeah?,” Matt’s jaw clenches as he ponders what has been said. He has his own thoughts regarding the matter but Nicholas seemed to cover them all for the most part, “I hope she makes you work like hell for it!,”

All Noah can really do is agree, they’re right. He was a coward, he did take the easy way out instead of facing his own problems and insecurities, and you should make him work like hell to get you back, to earn his place in Noelle’s life.

“Noelle,” Folio trails off, giggling to himself as he says the name, “Noeeeellee,”

“Dude, shut the fuck up!,” Jolly shouted with a bit of laughter layered underneath, Folio is such an airhead, it’s hard to have serious conversations like this around him. At least it eases some tension.

“It’s a cute name!!,”

“She’s an adorable baby,” Matt confirmed, “I only got a glimpse of her but she looks just like Noah,”

“Nah,” Noah shook his head, “She has my eyes but she has the curl of Y/N’s lashes. She has my lips but she has her mama’s chin. She has my dimples but Y/N’s cheeks. She’s both Y/N and me. She’s beautiful,”

Davis scoffs, raising his eyes, “Well you better get your shit together,”

“Yeah! I’m ready to be one kick ass uncle!,”

“Shut up, Folio!,”

You had taken it upon yourself to unblock everyone, figuring that if Noah told them the truth that they’d want to reach out, which they did.

It was scary at first, Noah had been a coward but you had your cowardly moments as well. Running off and not saying a word to people who cared about you- it wasn’t the nicest thing to do. Going through this with Noah had you realizing there are some things you would have done differently. This is a time of self reflection for everyone.

Although you’d been talking with them over the last week or so, you didn’t let the conversation stray too far from how you were doing. You weren’t ready to introduce them to Noelle or the idea of her just yet, you’re sure Noah has talked about her a bunch but you didn’t want to get too close to everyone again as of right now.

Ms. Ernie and Reid have been watching Noelle while you and Noah rebuild yourselves.

Dates that you made sure to let him know weren’t ‘actual dates’, walks at the park that turned into introspective discussions. It was all a work in progress and it made Ms. Ernie’s words hit even harder, there’s a lot to learn about love and that sometimes second chances are worth it.

You made him work like hell, but he was doing pretty well. He had different plans each day you guys hung out. He was attentive. He was gentle, he even told you about what he and his therapist talked about after each session.

In reality, you could tell he was doing better. You still had some reservations and there was still a long way to go but ultimately he was making a true effort. You could see the change he was making. Granted, it was a change that should have happened a long time ago but things happen the way they’re supposed to and when they’re supposed to.

That sentiment itself was a hard pill to swallow.

Today he took you on a picnic in the park, packed your favorite foods and drinks. He was really laying it on thick, others might find it cringe but it was making your heart flutter.

“I never did thank you, for telling them the truth,” popping a grape in your mouth, “I know it wasn’t easy,”

“It needed to happen. I knew better and I shouldn’t have lied to them but most importantly, I shouldn’t have lied on you. I was a coward and that’s not who I want to be to you… or Noey,”

A pleasant hum emitted from your chest, brows raising at the nickname that left his mouth.

“That one seemed to stick, huh?,”

“Noey is different… and it’s super close to Noah,”

“Noelle is already close to Noah!,” you bicker, both of you in high spirits while you go back and forth

“Noah has four letters and so does Noey,”

“Oh you’re such a kiss ass!,” you push him and he falls over dramatically.

“Help! Someone help!,” he shouted, feigning like he was injured

“Oh my God, Noah, stop! Someone is gonna think you’re serious!,” you reach over him to cover his mouth but he licks it and you squeal

“EEUUUGHHH!! You’re so gross!!,” you yank your hand back, he’s laughing like a hyena. Eyes wrinkling, hand in his chest and head thrown back.

“You used to do that to me all the time!” Justifying his action, you stick your tongue out at him while wiping your wet palm on his cheek

“Which means you can’t steal my move!,”

It was tense the first couple of meet ups and each one gets you closer to bringing Noelle around. These past couple of times had broken the ice and it started to feel like time hadn’t passed.

“Hey uhm, are you?- do you still live at the house?”

Noah settles down, feeling the energy shift to something a little more serious.

“Yeah. Didn’t have the guts to move. Why?,”

You twist grapeless vine in your hands, afraid to say the words now that you’re feeling comfortable to bring it up. It’s about 2 months of this and Noelle is a little over 6 months now.

“I’d like to bring Noelle by,”

Noah struggled for air, coughing up his drink and you can’t help but snicker at the liquid dripping off his chin.

“What?,” his eyes are as big as saucers

“Unless you’re not ready. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed,”

“No! No, I.. Y/N you have no idea how much I would love that,”

If you weren’t mistaken, you swear you see tears welling in his eyes

“I’d love to meet my daughter,”

This was a big step for you and an even bigger one for Noah. Both of you were scared beyond your wits.

“I’d like for it to just be us and then we can work up to getting the guys to meet her? And then you can meet Ms. Ernie, Reid and his husband, Morgan,”

You had to make sure to set some ground rules, Noah responded without any issues knowing that at the end of the day- you call the shots and he has to abide by them if he wants this to work. Yet despite feeling good about all of this, there’s still a smidge of uncertainty.

“What’s on your mind?,” even after all the time spent apart, reading you was like muscle memory.

“I still feel resentful,” you look to him to see his shoulders sagging, “I know you’re tired of it,”

“I don’t expect you to get over any of this anytime soon. In a way, you’re grieving and I can’t police how long you mourn. I can only help ease it,”

You didn’t really think of what you were going through as mourning but you guess you can see the similarities. What you two had was long gone and even in the face of starting over, albeit with the same person, you were still allowed to miss how things were and feel a bit out of sorts about what happened.

“It’s just,” you watch his hands as he picks at his palms, a nervous tick he’s always had. You’re once again feeling a sort of guilt making him feel like this but it’s a price he has to pay, right? You didn’t ask to be hurt to begin with.

“Resentment is so weird. I want to forgive you, Noah. So fucking bad I want to forgive you because I can’t keep doing this with you, I wish I could forget so I could just… hug you, kiss you, hold your hand like we used to,”

“You set the pace, Y/N. I told you no matter what, I respect it. I wish I could take it all back. God, I wish there was a way for me to go back so I didn’t fuck up and hurt you,”

“And my mind is struggling to comprehend why the fuck you would do that to me,” anger bleeds into your tone.

Noah is seen blubbering like a fish out of water as he tries to find his words. You can see the cogs turning in his mind, recalling the very night he ruined what you two had.

“There’s no explanation,” he declared, there was nothing good enough to excuse why he did what he did.

“No excuse, no reasoning that will ever be good enough for what I said to you. For how I treated you. It was unacceptable and there are no words to describe how apologetic I am. All I can say is, is that I’m so thankful you’re here, even giving me this chance,”

“You were all I could think about,” turning your body to him, he needed to know the turmoil you endured, “You hadn’t touched me in almost 3 months by the night I left. I was so consumed with the stress I didn’t realize I missed my period. I went to the doctor and that’s when I heard our little girl’s heartbeat,”

It didn’t get past him that you finally said our daughter and not just “my”. At this point, he has turned to look at you, listening closely, making sure you knew he was paying attention.

“I moved to the countryside and that’s where I met Ms. Ernie and Reid. They were my people while I was managing heartbreak. Keeping myself physically and mentally healthy so I could bring Noelle into this world. You… you should have been there Noah, you could’ve been there,”

“I know,” he blinks, tears falling down his cheeks just like yours were, “I missed out on so much because I couldn’t get my own shit together,”

“I took that pain and restructured it to fuel me so I could be the best parent I could be. I never thought I’d be sitting here in front of you. I never expected to see you again. Ever. But despite all the alarm bells, I am so fucking glad I am because I missed you, Noah. But I hate you so much at the same time,”

His face fashioned that of anguish at your last few words. It was hurting him but he didn’t look away from you, he didn’t hide his eyes, he’s now feeling what you felt that night and then some.

The anxiety. The fear, the fucking aching that burned from his gut all the way up into his throat. The pounding in his head, the heat that blanketed his skin. He can’t believe he did this to you. He can’t believe he sat across from you at the table that night, watching you fall apart and still said what he said.

“I don’t know how you expect us to rebuild anything,” your voice flows into his ears and he can feel his chest tightening, finding it harder to keep his breathing at a normal pace.

“Hell, I don’t even know how I expect us to rebuild anything but I’m going to try because that’s what you should have done!,”

“I-I know. Fuck, I.. I’m aware,” taking a deep breath to try to swallow his cries.

“I’m going to do what you couldn’t do,” a wild fire burns behind your eyes and he realizes this is a new you. The soft spoken Y/N is still there but this version of you takes no shit. You have a daughter now, you had to build tough skin

“I’m going to prove to you that fighting for what you want isn’t a lost fucking cause. I’m going to show you that no matter what is going on in your head, no matter what the voices are telling you- that I am here and I will be here until we are dust returned to the universe, Noah,”

You hated to see the way he dug his fingernails into his palms and you wanted nothing more than to grab his hands to massage the tension and cramps away.

“I know this is eating at you,” you whisper, “For the longest time I wanted it to. But not anymore,”

A great tremor overtook him, flexing his jaw to ease the ache from clenching it so hard. He had to break eye contact just this once to look up at the sky to will the tears away.

“Just take a page out of my book and take what you’re feeling to change and be better. No more apologies. Don’t be sorry, be better,”

“You sure you got everything?,” Reid packed your diaper bag into the front while you buckled Noelle into her carseat.

“Yeah I got my cooler for the bricks. My pump, extra clothes, extra wipes-,” you continue to list other items and at this point you’re not listing them to Reid, you’re listing them because you’re scared. 

“You got this,” Ms. Ernie kisses your cheek and you look at her with worry, “Don’t look at me like that. You both are going to be okay. He’s been groveling for weeks on end, he’s been respectful, if you want to back out I’m sure he’d understand?,”

“No! No. I think I’m ready. She’s already 6 months old now, he deserves this much,” It’s crazy to think that you’ve been at this with Noah for about a few months now.

You’re wrapped in an embrace of them both, Reid whispering words of reassurance as he pulls away, helping you settle in the car.

“Let us know when you get there, okay?,” Ms. Ernie waves from her front step.

You assure her that you’ll do just that. A lively wave is sent their way as you pull out of the driveway to make it to a house that you once called home, a house that could have been a home for Noelle. 

You didn’t need a GPS, you’d never forget the way there even if you tried. You could drive there blindfolded. The drive really wasn’t that long and a part of you wishes it was because when you pull up your stomach is full of butterflies. 

He’s probably nervous too. Don’t stress about it. As if he was waiting by the door, he’s out on the porch, wiping his hands on a paper towel when you exit your vehicle.

“Need help with anything?,” a nervous smirk across his face, he looks like he’s going to throw up at any second.

“Wanna grab the diaper bag and cooler?,”

He didn’t give a verbal answer. He was already down the steps and to your car before you finished asking. You grabbed Noelle’s carrier and waited for him to get the other items. Seeing him with the lavender diaper bag on his shoulder stirred a feeling inside of you. He looked like a dad, he looked good. A yearn made itself present in your body, you just wanted to be a family.

“Follow me,” 

You could tell he was excited, excited but tense. He didn’t want to fuck this up. 

Once you’re settled in the house, he heads upstairs, mumbling that he’ll be right back. When taking your jacket off to hang it on the second hook on the back of the door, you realize the hook still has your name on it. He never took it off, this was your hook, everyone knew not to hang their things on it. And beside yours, you see one for Noelle. Noah, Y/N and Noelle. Your fingers brush against the names and a smile creeps on your face.

“I know she probably already has one but I figured it would be nice if she had one here. She’ll probably end up falling asleep depending on how long you stay,”

You turn around to see a lavender playpen with her name on the side.

“In a lot of the videos and pictures you showed me, she’s wearing lavender so..,”

“Noah,” you coo, stepping over to him, “That’s so sweet,” 

You turn to Noelle in her carrier and unbuckle her, “If you wanna go wash your hands, you can hold her,”

“Yeah?,” his eyes lit up like a little kid on Christmas. He didn’t even wait for you to answer before he’s jogging into the kitchen to scrub his hands clean. About a good minute later he’s rushing back in but he seems hesitant. 

“Don’t worry,” you assure him, “I show her pictures just like I show you pictures. She knows you. She won’t really be fussy” 

You cradle her while handing her over to him.

“She likes to be held like this, just support her neck,” 

Noah takes her from you softly, his large hands make her seem so small, even at six months. He stares at her in awe and sits down gently. Noelle babbles at him, waving her hands and smiling. 

“Hiii, baby girl,” 

You can hear the tears as he speaks to her and you take a seat beside him, not bothered by how close you were.

“I’m your papa,” he chokes on his words, caressing her cheek with the back of his finger, “You’re so beautiful just like your mama,”

There weren’t many words said as Noah soaked in this moment with you watching. His breath is silently hitching from his tears but he only cries harder when Noelle reaches out and touches his cheek, seemingly wiping a tear away.

Noah sits back on the sofa, setting his feet flat on the cushion so he could lay Noelle on his thighs so that she was sitting up.

“You’re so sweet,” he kisses her hand, causing her to squeal and giggle. He looks to you with wide eyes and a bright smile

“You were right!,” 

“I told you!!,” you lean closer and watch the way Noelle is taking in the moment as well. She stares at Noah with a look of bewilderment, she’s never been around him physically yet relaxes into him like she’s known him since day one. She knows that’s her papa.

“Thank you,” he says simply, “I’m far from deserving but thank you so much, Y/N,”

“You deserve to be a dad, Noah. And she deserves one,”

“I won’t fuck this up,”

“You better not,” you poke his cheek, “Because she needs you… we both do,”

You let Noah record videos of him and her, letting him make up for lost time. He carefully danced around the living room with her while playing happy baby songs.

“I heard songs like this make them happy!,” he insisted. Each time she squealed he hugged her tighter, absolutely adoring the sound of his baby laughing with him. You couldn’t help but record some videos of your own, wanting to look back at this moment. 

The foundation still needed some work but what is life without the effort? What’s love without effort? He said he wouldn’t screw it up this time and you’re holding him to his word.

“She’s down for bed,” Noah comes down the stairs, heading to the kitchen to return with two mugs 

“She’s never fallen asleep that fast,” taking a mug from him, you smell your favorite tea in the way he used to make it. 

“Does she wake you up throughout the night? I can be on baby duty so you can rest. U-unless you planned on going home tonight. I can drive you home, I don’t want you driving while you’re tired,” he offered.

“Can we stay?,” circling the rim of your cup, finding the heat from your tea comforting. 

“You two always have a place here,” he sets the baby monitor on the table and takes a sip of his coffee. He was always a late night coffee drinker, at least it was decaf, he just liked the taste. 

There was a comfortable lull that fell over you two and sitting on this very couch in this living room felt like home, like you belonged here. You made a home out of the cabin in the countryside but *this… this is where you felt like you were meant to be. Drinking your warm beverages on the couch while your child slept, simply enjoying each other’s company.

Noah randomly stands up and turns the tv on. He’s getting a game console, plugging it up and connecting the remotes. You’re watching in confusion while he does this all as if he’s on a mission. 

Once he gets everything connected he pulls out a game case. 

Michael Jackson: The Experience

“Nooaaaaaah,” you say suspiciously, “What are you doing?,” setting your cup on the side table, you watch with a questioning frown when he moves the coffee table

“Stand up,” insisting with a wide grin, he takes your hand despite your wariness

“What are we doing, Sebastian?” 

“We’re putting all those nights practicing with the music videos to use. I scored these at a yard sale and figured we could dance to some good ole Michael like we used to,” 

He hands you a Wii remote and the butterflies erupt again, spotting the same broken lampshade that he still hasn’t gotten rid of. 

“You think you still got it?,” you tease, wrapping the band around your wrist. 

He scoffs loudly, rolling his eyes, “You wish I lost it,” 

“Put your money where your mouth is,” 

He side eyes you with a little smirk, choosing the song he wanted to dance to. You expected Thriller, hell maybe even Ghosts. But he surprised you when he chose Do You Remember the Time

“If I win. I get to take you out on a romantic date,” he sighs triumphantly, he knows since you two started to rebuild something new, you didn’t want to get too romantic just yet.

“Okay,” you nod confidently, much to his surprise, “But if I win… you’re on baby duty for a night. That means getting up to feed her, change her diaper, cuddle-,”

“All I’m seeing is a win-win situation here,” turning back to the screen he hits play, “Bring your A game. I’ve been practicing for this very moment,” 

He says it as if he’s joking but he was serious. This was a song you two spent many nights listening to, belting it at the top of your lungs during late night drives, to dancing in the kitchen to it after date night. 

This little gesture may seem like just a night of dancing to a game to you but it was much more to him. So when the gold room appeared on the screen after picking your characters, he became timorous.

The beat begins and you feel a little silly following the movements at first. You hadn’t danced with Noah in ages but he probably feels just as goofy. You notice him missing a few beats and peak to see him adoring you, the way your nose crinkles when you smile, the way your eyes move across the screen, trying to focus.

“You’re not gonna win if you keep staring at me, Sebastian!,” 

“Fuck!,”

~Do you remember when we fell in love? We were young and innocent then~

You trip over your feet as the dance begins to incorporate footwork, glaring at Noah when you hear him laughing at you.

~Do you remember, back in the fall? We’d be together all day long~

You bend your knees and shimmy your feet along the carpet while Noah stands tall and moves in the opposite direction over you. Feeling him this close, despite just playing a game, had your heart palpitating. 

You never thought you’d have nights like this again. With anyone, let alone Noah. 

You hear Noah singing to himself while he follows the dance moves to a T, seeing his score get higher than yours had you ready to wreck his streak.

“Do you remember the time when weeee first met, girl?” He sang obnoxiously while looking at you, purposely singing off key. You snicker at his expressions, missing a move but you can’t bring yourself to care. 

Noah seemed so carefree and comfortable in this moment that it started to overshadow what had once hurt you, somewhat putting it on the back burner. 

~Those sweet memories, will always be dear to me~

You and Noah are now face to face, chest to chest, you two seemed to forget the game. Both of you breathing heavily from laughing and going all out on the dance moves.

“You’re gonna lose,” you pipe up, turning around to focus back on the game. You knew that if you stood there any longer you’d have kissed him. 

Noah seemed to snap out of his daze, immediately hopping back into where he was. You have to squat in front of him for the next move and it seems to last forever, feeling the burn like you’re in the gym.

“Oh my God!,” groaning in relief when you’re finally able to move from your position but the relief doesn’t last long when you’re made to go back, moving your arms up and feeling his hands touch yours. 

It sounds dramatic but you swear you feel a little tingle when he touches you. Maybe it was static or maybe it was the fact you missed his touch. A sensation that you felt so safe in, so comfortable and loved. 

You two slide away from each other, swinging your arms back and forth. You’re still following the screen but Noah decides to freestyle. Falling to his knees to sing the song to you, you’d worry about waking Noelle up but she was a deep sleeper. 

“Do you remember girl?,” he holds his fists up, singing passionately, “On the phone! You and me!! Till dawn, 2 or 3. What about us, GIRL!!,” 

You can’t help but throw your head back in entertainment at his dramatics. He was a performer for sure.

“Do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya- in the park, on the beach! You and me, in Spain! What about, what about- rrrap tap tap, rrrap tap tap!,”

His ad libs bounce off the walls and you’re losing it.

“You look insane!,” you say over his off-key singing. 

He continues to sing despite your judgment, standing up and grabbing you by the shoulders, shaking you playfully

“Yeah! Yeah! Wooo!!,” 

The game is now complete and you fall back on the couch to catch your breath.

“I freestyled and I STILL won!,” he claps and points at you, “Pick out your prettiest dress, doll face because we’re going on a DATE!,” 

He stands in front of you, hands on his hips in victory and all you can do is cherish the view.

“Come here,” you stand before him, hearing your heart pound in your ears as he steps forward until his chest is level with your eyes, his famous chain glinting in the light on the room.

“What’s up?,” the confidence he just displayed was now replaced with diffidence. 

“You better not hurt me again,” it was strange being this close to him, “If you hurt me you’ll not only lose me but Sunshine as well and I don’t want that for her. So if this is going to happen- you talk to me when your insecurities set in. You talk to me before you self sabotage. You talk to me no matter what so that you continue to show up for our little girl. Do you understand me?,”

Noah nods his head so quickly that you think it just might fall off and roll away.

“I understand. I won’t make the same mistake twice. I love you and I love our baby. I was a fool to fuck up the first time. I won’t be that again,” 

“Good,” you nod, stepping away before patting his cheek with a sly grin.

“Because you’re on baby duty tonight,” 

His jaw drops at your antics, he doesn’t mind really. He’s starting to feel like an actual father now.

“But I won!!,”

You wake up abruptly to Noelle screeching, a type of cry you’ve never heard before and you turn to see Noah’s spot empty. Scrambling to get out of bed, you rush downstairs to see him panicking, tears in his eyes and red in the face

“I’m sorry,” he muttered to her, frantically trying to calm her 

“What happened??,” you kept your composure, not wanting to stress him out anymore than he already is. He hands you Noelle and he pulls at his roots, absolutely distraught and upset with himself.

“She was hungry and I… I heated up her milk for too long. Fuck, Y/N I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-,”

“Noah,” a soft hand on his chest, “It happens. She’s okay,” 

“I made her cry,” 

“She’s okay,” you reassure, “See,” you wipe her tears and she’s just left whimpering now.

You take his hand to sit him down at the table and give Noelle back to him despite his fear

“Don’t tense up. She’ll feel it and become fussy. Relax,” 

He took heed to your words, relaxing so that Noelle could follow suit.

“I should have put a brick in the fridge to thaw,” you mention, “I usually do if I know I’ll be too tired to breastfeed but I was exhausted so it slipped my mind. A brick will usually thaw in the fridge overnight and when it’s time, just set it in a cup of warm water for a few minutes and you’ll be good to go,” 

You take her bottle and run it under some cool water, testing it on your wrist, deeming it cool yet warm enough for her to drink. You sit beside Noah and hand him the bottle. 

“Here, you’re all set. 45 degree angle while she drinks,” you instruct. He follows your words and Noelle hums around the bottle, cuddling into Noah’s shirtless chest, “She likes skin to skin contact while feeding. Now she’ll really know you’re her papa,” 

You realize this is the same table he broke your heart at, tracing the pattern of the mahogany wood. You wouldn’t let that night haunt you anymore. Here’s to new memories. Now, this table will be remembered as the table that he fed your daughter for the first time, a learning experience for him. 

“I’m so sorry for hurting you, honey,” he whispered to her, kissing her forehead while her eyes fluttered sleepily, “I’m still learning but it won’t happen again,” 

You know his words were directed to you as well, finding solace in the reassurance. 

Once you teach him to burp her, the three of you make your way upstairs and back to bed.

“You can put her in the crib,” climbing into the bed that was once yours to claim. He took the time to build her crib and didn’t even wanna put her in it.

“I will once I’m ready to sleep, I just want to spend time with her is all,” 

Despite the infant sleeping, he wasn’t ready to put her down. His hair was thrown all over his head, his eyes here heavy but he was willing to fight sleep just to hold her in his arms for as long as he could. 

“I missed out on enough, I just wanna hold her,” 

“Okay,” you nod, sitting up and scooting closer to rest your head on his shoulder, “Sing, you are my sunshine, to her. It’s her favorite song and I think she would like to hear it from you,” 

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,” he begins with ease, “You make me happy, when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away,” 

“You are my star shine,” you add in, “My only star shine,” 

You reach over to hold her small hand, resting your hand on his chest,

“I love you so much, each night and day,” 

Noah leans his head on yours, finding comfort in the words you sing. 

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my star shine away,” 

You look up to Noah, refusing to move your head off his shoulder so he rears back to look at you, your face being illuminated by the little nightlight you had plugged in for Noelle.

“You are my love shine, my only love shine,” he sings lowly, surprising you that he even knows the third verse of the nursery rhyme, “I miss you so much when you’re away,” 

The smile that appeared on your face was one he’ll never forget, especially when you begin to harmonize with him quietly, watching the way Noelle snuggles into his chest as if she can’t get close enough to him. 

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you,” you two sing together, curling into him even more when he plants a kiss on the crown of your head.

“Please don’t take my love shine awaaaay,” 

Days had passed since that night. You and Noah alternate every couple of nights of whose place to stay at. He finally got the pleasure of meeting Ms. Ernie and Reid officially, offering his gratitude to the people who kept you and Noelle safe when he fell short. Despite his own shortcomings, they welcomed him with open arms. 

Reid currently had Noelle in the living room, both of them watching some cartoon movie while Ms. Ernie helped you with your hair, preparing for the night Noah had planned for you. 

“Do I look like I’m trying too hard?,” you turn to her, concern painted all over your face.

“You look like a beautiful youngin who is about to steal the heart of the love of their life,” 

“You flatter me,”

“Well it’s true,” she boops your nose and tucks your hair behind your ear, “You’re going to have fun!,” 

Noah wouldn’t exactly tell you what he had planned. He just said to dress in something comfortable and cute, so you stepped out of your comfort zone, going with a light floral dress, styling your hair to your comfort and a light face of makeup. 

When you heard the doorbell to your cabin go off, your stomach sank.

“Oh goodness!!,” turning to the smiling woman above you, “He’s here!! He’s 10 minutes early!,”

A light rumble comes from her, shaking her head and standing you up, “You would have still freaked out even if he showed up on time. Head up there!,”

You didn’t have time to respond due to the doorbell ringing again. A nervous Noah stood on the other side, worried that maybe you changed your mind. When the door swung open, both of you were speechless. 

You stood there, radiant as ever with Noelle in your arms. A nervous grin framed your teeth and Noah watched as you rubbed Noelle’s back, not for her comfort but for yours. You were antsy. Just as beautiful as the first day he met you when he knocked your bus token out of your hand.

Noah stood there in a plain, white shirt tucked into a pair of sleek black joggers. You noticed he cut his hair, cutting the sides short and keeping the top longer. He recreated the outfit he wore when you two first bumped into each other.

“Hi,” your throat tight around the simple word.

“H-hi,” he had a hand behind his back and stuck the other out, “Nice to meet you, my name is Noah,” 

You frown at his words until you realize this is a reintroduction.

“Hi, Noah. My name is Y/N and it’s wonderful to meet you,” 

Both of you are similar to giddy teenagers falling in love for the first time. He handed you a bouquet of your favorite flowers and you were quick to gasp. You loved flowers, you loved it even more when he gifted them to you.

Inviting him in, Noelle was quick to reach for him and he spun her around while you retrieved the glass milk bottle you received from Ms. Ernie to use as a vase.

“Looking gooooood!,” the elderly woman entered the room and pinched Noah’s cheek lightly.

“I can clean up nice!,” 

Reid entered the space and gave his compliments to the both of you and caught sight of the flowers, nudging Noah.

“Nice choice,” he whispered.

Once both of you give Noelle a ton of kisses, Noah takes your hand and guides you out to the car so you all could get your evening started.

“You gonna tell me what you have planned yet?,” hounding him as he begins to drive. 

“Dinner,” he answers, a smirk on his face to tell you that it wasn’t just dinner.

“Why so cryptic?” you poke him

“Relaaaaax,” he reaches over to grab your hand and squeeze. The two of you missing this simple gesture, feeling safe like this, like all will be okay, it will- but you’ll never get tired of the warm feeling of security. 

Noah took you out to your favorite restaurant, a nice night of expensive wine and taking bites of the other’s food. A bunch of blushing, a bunch of butterflies, laughter and unspoken I love yous. 

Now you find yourself with your hand in his, strolling downtown, him insisting that the night isn’t over. When you stop walking, you peer up to him and see an uncertain smirk on his face. Looking up to the sign on the building, you see what he had planned.

“Kiln of Sunshine,” you read aloud, “Couple’s pottery?”

All he does is laugh at your surprise and leads you inside. There aren’t many couples but it’s a nice intimate place. Dim lights strung up on the ceiling, custom printed aprons with your names on it, which he helps you put on and tie. 

When you’re directed to your designated spots, he sits behind you while you sit in front of the wheel.

“Welcome to the Kiln of Sunshine! We are a couple of potters who met through our love of art,” a young woman stands in front of the class, it’s hard to listen when Noah is so close like this. He still makes you so damn nervous.

“We created this abode to help other couples not only find a new hobby, but also grow together by means of communication and teamwork through making art!” The woman’s husband added with excitement. 

You look over your shoulder to see Noah already looking at you

“You look so beautiful,” he whispers. You have to tuck your chin into your shoulder to hide the fact your face was burning up at his compliment. 

The couple teaching gives you all step by step instructions to begin and then it’s just you and Noah left to your own devices. They gave you the guidelines but now it’s up to you and Noah to decide what you two create.

Much like a relationship. 

“Here, let’s try this,” Noah’s large, clay covered hands form to yours, his chin resting on your shoulder, “Pinch here,”

“Maybe we should coil instead,” suggesting lightly. 

“Okay, yeah,” he nods, taking in your point of view, “I think it’ll turn out better that way,”

Noah hands you the wet sponge, watching the way your tongue sticks out from your lips as you concentrate. 

“I brought us here because I came to a lot of conclusions during our time apart,” his body frames yours like a puzzle piece, after a while, instead of you taking the lead, you let his hands guide yours now.

“Yeah?,” 

“Pottery teaches us a lot about accepting faults- appreciating the imperfections and flaws that can turn into something beautiful,” he moves your hands to pinch the clay in certain spots and watch your piece come to life. 

“Furthermore, we have patience and persistence- pottery, like relationships, demands patience at every turn. To keep going in the face of difficulties, even if you don’t see the results right away. It takes time to mold something beautiful” 

Noah kept going and you’d be lying if his words weren’t tear jerking. While you two were rekindling, you had some introspective moments of your own. Realizing that there are some things you could have done differently yourself. Especially since finding out about the mental battles he was facing during the last few months of your relationship, which caused him to break it off.

You were so caught up in your own mind that you didn’t realize Noah’s actions were due to the fact that it wasn’t Noah- he pulled back from you because he was trying to figure his own labyrinthine mind out, that’s why he kept asking for time, he just felt ashamed to say it out loud. 

Both of you got time, even if it wasn’t in the most ideal form.

“I’m still learning and growing and I know I have a long way to go for you to fully trust me because of those faults, but I’m patient and I’m not going anywhere,” 

You felt him kiss your shoulder, causing goosebumps to flourish on your skin.

“Well… maybe we won’t need the water bowl to wet the sponge anymore since you’ve got me crying over here!,” 

The laughter that erupts from the two of you is boisterous, providing comedic relief in the midst of him expressing his emotions. 

“You two are doing great over here!!,” the instructor complimented the piece the two of you were crafting.

You felt the swell of pride in your chest because whether she was talking about your pottery piece or not, you and Noah are doing great.

The night progressed beautifully. You had to leave your piece at the place overnight so it could get fired and glazed before you took it home to decorate yourselves. So, Noah took you on a stroll, your hand in his, taking in the view of the pretty lights set up downtown. Finding yourselves in front of the big fountain in the center, you stick your hand out to him

“C’mon, big money. Hand over a quarter,” 

He quickly digs in his pocket and hands you a shiny coin in which you hold up to your mouth, whispering to it before throwing it in the fountain. The light plopping sound it made was satisfying to you.

“What did you wish for?,”

You notice him taking his shoes and socks off, rolling up his pant legs and you feel suspicion rising in your belly.

“That would beat the purpose of a wish!,” 

“Take your shoes off,” 

“No! I know what you’re about to do and I spent too much time on my hair and make up!,”

Noah sat you down on the edge of the fountain, removing your shoes for you

“You know that you don’t need your makeup and hair all done up for me to find you absolutely breathtaking… right?,” 

He gives you no time to reply before he’s standing you up and bringing you into the fountain, twirling you around under the raining streams. 

“Noah we’re gonna get in trouble!!,” squealing in his arms, trying to get out of them. He sets you down but before you can scold him, his wet hands are framing your face to pull you in for the long awaited kiss that he’s been wanting to give you since the day you left. 

You felt like you were in a movie. The hopeless romantic that lived within you was thriving. You were stuck in your spot for a second, realizing that since starting over, this is your first kiss and he made it so damn romantic. Pulling him in by his shirt, your lips follow his, flowing with the same desire and unspoken words.

I’m sorry.

I forgive you.

We’re going to be okay.

I don’t hate you

I love you.

I always will.

Damning your own instinctive need to breathe, you pull away from him, pressing your fingertips to your lips, still completely shocked by it all.

“I’m sorry I just… I couldn’t fight it anymore,” he looked so ethereal, wet hair sticking to his face, droplets on his cheeks and big, brown eyes staring back at you with blown pupils.

“Until the day we are returned to dust to the universe, I will love you and cherish you. I will be what I should have always been. And even then… even after we are just dust- I will find you in another timeline and continue to be that and more”

Life is a beautiful thing now. It was no longer grey and neither of you felt like you were just getting by, you were finally living. 

You didn’t want to give up your cabin, so despite all the memories the house back in the city had, you two decided to make more memories out here.

Your house was full now, filled with friends you missed dearly, all of them soaking up time with Noelle, getting used to being uncles. 

“Nuh uh!,” Noah shouts, “Folio, wash your hands before holding her,” 

“What the hell! I just did!!,” he defended, arms halfway out, ready to reach for his niece.

“Not long enough! Sing happy birthday twice if you have to- and don’t swear around my daughter!,” 

Noah fit the dad role real well. He was proud to be the father of your child. He doted on Noelle, always took pictures with her, sang to her (a lot better than you ever did) and though Noah had a love for the city, he loved being out here with you two, taking her on daily walks around the countryside while you tended to the chickens and garden. 

You thought he’d put up a bigger fight due to his career but- things were simple out here and being out here made him feel normal and domestic. This is what life was always supposed to feel like and it’s what the two of you had always envisioned. 

“Everyone get ready, dinner’s almost finished!,” Ms. Ernie hollered. She loved the guys, it didn't take long for her to warm up to people and just like she took you under her wing, she did the same for them. She even listens to their music now, she says Hedonist is her favorite. 

Folio doesn’t care to make his plate now that he has Noelle, making her squeal and laugh at his silly faces. 

Matt bumps you as he moves past you to get a drink out of your fridge, “I told you he wouldn’t take her from you,” 

“You only get one ‘I told you so’ in our friendship and you used it well. Thanks, Matty,” 

During the time you and Noah were reconnecting, you had to rebuild your friendships with the guys as well. You and Matt now have your farmer’s market dates back. You, Jolly, Davis and Folio have your bowling on Thursday nights while you and Bryan go to the movies every Tuesday because they’re half off. And Nicholas- the one who truly is like a brother, both of you had your chess game that you abandoned but he kept the board set in hopes that one day you’ll come back. 

He taught you how to play ages ago and when you finally got the hang of it, you two matched all the time, some matches going for days, this match being the longest ever due to a hiatus. 

He had the board with him, setting it up on the counter, both of you moving your pieces throughout the day.

“I know how to beat you,” staring at the board, he comes to stand beside you.

“Yeah?,” grinning as if he wasn’t about to lose.

“You have nowhere to go, Nicky,” you pick your Queen up, moving her to h5, threatening his f7. You watch him frown at your movements and you have to hide the smirk on your face. If you win, you’ll no longer be tied. 

You move your Queen to take his f7 and you check his king.

“No!,”

“Checkmate!,” clapping in victory, you jump up and down, “I still got it!!,”

“You got lucky!,” 

Despite him losing, he was always a good sport. He did teach you after all.

After dinner, Reid provided dessert, topped with a delicious honey glaze he made from his bees. Matt started a fire pit outside which left only you, Noah and Noelle in the kitchen as you two arranged to put her down for bed. He had her wrapped up against his chest while you prepared his coffee and your tea.

Noelle cooed against his chest, eyes fluttering and trying to fight sleep.

“I love you,” he searched your face, feeling blessed that he can say the words to you again. Your eyes sparkle in the warm light of the kitchen, feeling blessed to hear those words once again. You’ll never get tired of hearing it, especially because it’s all different now. It’s healthier, happier.

“And I love you,” of course you do- it was muscle memory. 

After lightly clinking your mugs together, your eyes catch sight of the fruit bowl you and Noah made in your pottery class. Your painted hand print on one side, his on the other and Noelle’s in the middle with 4 simple words written across it.

You are my Sunshine.

Stepping closer to him, his arm wrapped around your shoulder, the two of you stood in silence just enjoying each other’s presence. Finding joy in the laughter of your loved ones outside. 

All is well and always will be. Ms. Ernie was right. Sometimes second chances are worth it. 

“Thanks for adding to the sunshine instead of taking it away,”

Noah could hear the relief in your voice that things turned out for the better. He’d never give this up. Home isn’t a place, home is this moment right here and every moment after.

“Until we are dust returned to the universe.”

First and foremost i wanted to thank everyone for their patience while i worked on this!! this story means so much to me and i am grateful for the love i received on part one and hope you all enjoy this part even if it’s a little long!!!

Please be sure to reblog and comment as it helps us writers out a lot!!!

much love!

~Berry 🫐

tags: @dravenskye @babs-96 @tech-depression-inventory @magnificentstrawberryomen @mrscevans @tinyfairies @mxddymay @themorticians-world @rainy-darling @lma1986 @darknightstarryeyes @thisbicc @lilhobgobbler @lovethe-void @cind6547 @flowery-mess @widowsofchaos @abiomens @amelia-acero @collapsedglasshouses @poppy-in-the-woods @rostoken @dkxxm @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @fadingintothegrey @blairboo

[triplefrontierbabe]

Daniel Ricciardo smau

pairing: f!reader x Daniel Ricciardo

warnings: use of yn (sorry), suggestive themes, alternate universe, depictions of smoking

disclaimer: photos from Pinterest and/or Instagram, I take no credit for the photos

yourusername

liked by enchante , lilymhe and 567,945 others

yourusername visited the ratatouille cinematic universe 🐀🇫🇷

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lilymhe so cool they made a whole city based on a movie 😍

↳ danielricciardo don’t feed her delusions plz 😩

haileesteinfeld baby’s first Parisian cigarette 🥹

↳ yourusername and my last 😵‍💫

dr3fan omg I knew yn was my fave wag for a reason

f1wagupdates the harry styles pic is so hilarious lmfao

danielricciardo are you a tower? cause Eiffel for you :)

↳landonorris Danny Ric pickup line domination could bore fans

↳ yourusername lmao bye

danielricciardo

liked by maxverstappen1 , oscarpiastri and 1,563,820 others

danielricciardo city of love with my love

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yourusername wearing enchante like you know how to speak French 🙄

↳ danielricciardo weird way to say i love you but okay

honeybadgerfan ugh when will it be my turn 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

landonorris bros either got massive hands or that’s just a really tiny cup

↳ danielricciardo you know which one 😉

↳ yourusername in front of my espresso?!😦

joshallenqb bring back Ricallen some LV swag 🙏

↳ danielricciardo bringing Allen some LV swag too

charles_leclerc la vie en rose!

↳ danielricciardo idk what that means

alex_albon how much did she pay you to go to the museum with her 🤣

↳ yourusername it took copious amounts of pain au chocolat

yourusername

liked by visacashapprb , francisca.cgomes and 749,034 others

yourusername I said “I want to go to the spa” but Danny heard “I want to go to Spa” 🧖‍♀️🏎️🇧🇪🧇

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francisca.cgomes this has also happened to me😔🤚

↳ yourusername I think we owe ourselves a spa day with massages and manicures 🙂‍↕️

danielricciardo okay so I missed the “the” 🙄🙄

danielricciardo also the spa doesn’t have waffles but Spa does so I think that’s what counts

maxverstappen1 Daniel’s an old man, you can’t always count on him hearing things correctly

↳ danielricciardo did the bottle of wine mean nothing to you?!?!

f1waggossip of course she would complain about being at a race

↳ dricdefender girl take a joke

danielricciardo

liked by georgerussell63 , valtteribottas and 2,648,749 others

danielricciardo great weekend in Spa. Got some points and waffles 😋🧇🇧🇪🏎️

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maxverstappen1 cheeeeeers 🍷🚁

↳ danielricciardo cheeeeeeeers

yourusername GIRL. GET UP.

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↳ danielricciardo IM UP

↳ yourusername yeah in a helicopter with max

visacashapprb we love weekends that result in Doints

↳ f1fan omg vcarb admin is on it

dannyriclover he’s so hot in that first pic 🤤

↳dannyfearic yn is so lucky

yourusername

liked by haileesteinfeld , tatemcrae and 1,004,732 others

yourusername summer break getaway in Austin 🧡🤠🌅 (last pic is Danny mansplaining waterfalls to me </3)

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landonorris at least it wasn’t maxplaining

↳ yourusername a win is a win

↳ maxverstappen1 I’m hurt 😞

↳ danielricciardo it’s okay hun she didn’t mean it

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lilymhe little cutie cowgirl

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tatemcrae my queeeen

↳ yourusername MY queeeen

danielricciardo she doesn’t skip glutes day 🙏🍑 (I’m looking respectfully)

↳ yourusername I’m gonna have to fact check that

gossipf1wags wait I love this aesthetic

danielricciardo

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danielricciardo couldn’t wait till October to be back in Austin 🤘🤠🌻

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yourusername I need a moment

↳ maxverstappen1 me too

↳ yourusername 👉🚪

dannysnumber1fan thank you yn for the last pic we all say in unison

visacashapprb likely place for the Honey Badger to be 🍯🦡

georgerussell63 lad’s coming for my brand 😂

↳ danielricciardo I learn from the best 🤣

oscarpiastri thanks for the reminder that I should work on evening out my tan

beatsbydre not pictured: Ricallen gallivanting in the distance 🐎⚡️

joshallenqb yeehaw

↳ danielricciardo we should get another horse

↳ haileesteinfeld NO

↳ yourusername what she said ^^

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Click here to view my Masterlist

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smau taglist: @bernelflo @ifyouaintfirstyourelastt

inbox me to be put on my tag list for 1) smau 2) text au or 3) all f1 & Indycar works

[luvingarisu]

Hiii

Can you make something like going to prom with Gwi-Nam or Gwi-Nam as a girl dad headcanons

hi!!! i’ll do girl dad gwi-nam bc unfortunately i think this man would refuse to go to prom with you no matter how much he liked you😭

♡ teen dad gwi-nam <3

♡ honestly, did NOT want a kid at first, like most teen parents, but he was obviously a lot meaner about it. the only reason he stayed was because you guys went to the same school and his parents made him take responsibility😭😭

♡ does the absolute bare minimum throughout the pregnancy, but when your baby girl is born? he warms up, little by little

♡ the crying made his ears FUCKING bleed, and he already knew that the nights your baby girl stayed over at his, he would be near about punching walls every time she woke him up crying

♡ but when she’s all giggly and babbling away? when she grips his finger? when she waves her little arms when she sees a spoonful of food coming towards her? he’d never admit it, but he’s smitten.

♡ like BRO wdym that’s HIS baby?

♡ so, yeah, he ends up being a surprisingly very doting dad, he loves his baby girl

♡ every time he looks at her he can’t believe there was a point in time he didn’t want a kid, or a time he was debating on whether or not he wanted to be involved

♡ thinks she’s so cute dressed up in all her frilly dresses, but he’s a dude, and also buys her boy clothes because he wants her to look cool

♡ one day she’ll be wearing a little frilly dress and the next she’s in baggy baby jeans and a bat-man shirt or something

♡ she gets a little messy when he’s with her daddy, as long as she’s safe, he lets her play however she wants, so she’ll come home to you with paint or muck on her little face and clothes, and her hair no longer in the pretty bows you put on her that morning

♡ because he’s literally an eighteen year old guy, if she swears after hearing it on tv or gives someone the finger after seeing him do so he’ll just crack up

♡ he tries to be a responsible dad and tell her it isn’t polite but he literally can never follow through and just laughs more, and you probably do as well

♡ breaks his heart when he has to tell her off for something to, even if she tried to do something dangerous like touch a hot plate or whatever, he’ll be like :(

♡ because you guys are teen parents, obviously you have to live at home, you can’t live together so on the nights she stays at yours and not his he’ll ask to face time her! he misses his baby girl!

♡ i’m not the type to mischaracterise gwi-nam, he’s an awful guy but i really think he’d have a soft spot for his baby girl

♡ he absolutely hates other kids though, can’t stand other children at all😭

♡ but his is special! she’s not annoying like other kids to him (even if she actually is)

♡ loves taking her to school bro

♡ on days you can’t find child care he’ll act like bringing her to school is gonna make his day so much harder but he LOVESSS it

♡ more time with his baby, he gets to hold her hand in class, she’ll sit in the nurses office, or if the school allows it, can sit beside either of you colouring or something and it’s so cute!

♡ also absolutely jumps at the opportunity to leave class when she gets fussy

♡ he doesn’t want her upset, and also doesn’t want to be in class, like at all

♡ the annoying thing about bringing her to school is all the gawking

♡ he hates the cooing from the other students, mainly the girls

♡ he knows his daughter is cute, but he doesn’t need nor want people swarming her all the time, whether she enjoys the attention or gets overwhelmed

♡ if someone asks to hold her he looks at them like they’re fucking stupid

♡ “she’s two, she can walk just fine.”

♡ at school the only person who can touch or hold her aside from you two is the nurse. that’s it. no one else.

♡ when she was a baby he was such a helicopter parent, you both were, no one aside from family could hold her, but no one aside from you two could give her little kisses

♡ she could get sick!!!!

♡ also, thankfully for other students, tones down on beating people up! not out of niceness though, he just literally doesn’t have the time

♡ no more harassing people on rooftops at night because he has to do bed time😭

♡ still an absolute asshole though, don’t get me wrong, he’ll insult people, be rude, blackmail people, all things stereotypically gwi-nam, but he won’t do them in front of his daughter

♡ worst part about being a dad is getting a part time job to afford all the things kids need though </3

♡ his allowance is NAWT gonna cover baby food and alla that shit

♡ you guys can’t get her much for christmas and her birthday but you really try!! little dolls, toy makeup, cute clothes, it’s all mainly small stuff and then one ‘big’ present.

♡ literally nearly dies whenever she hugs him and says ‘thank you daddy’ in her little baby voice :(

♡ all in all, good dad! absolutely adores his baby girl despite the fact he’s a terrible person <3

[illubean]

Valorant Protocol as Highschool Stereotypes

Characters: Chamber, Gekko, Iso, Jett, Killjoy, Neon, Phoenix, Raze, Sage, Skye, Viper, Yoru Type: Headcanons

HAHA help me valorant brainrot >.< also this is based off of my hs experience soooo yeah

Warnings: none

Chamber

your typical pretty boy

all the girls love him all the boys hate him

well...most of the girls love him

they follow him around to classes or offer him gifts or ask to sit with him at lunch etc.

and he eats up the attention every time

he's lab partners with Viper in Environmental Sciences and he likes trying to flirt with her

she actually hates him btw

Gekko

canonically he skateboards

but honestly? I can see him being on the dance team

he's so high energy, he needs some sort of outlet

he never misses an opportunity to show off his dance moves

homecoming? prom? he is the center of the dance circle

like Raze, he doesn't know how popular he is

he's just happy to have so many good friends that it doesn't even actually occur to him that he's considered "popular"

Iso

he's an ap art kid

like he walks around with a big ass sketchbook every day

always talking about his portfolio

Iso baby ily but please shut the fuck up about oil paints <3

he probably volunteered part of his summer break to come in and paint a mural for the school

I think he'd also take a piano class as like a schedule filler but he actually gets crazy good at it

Jett

pe tryhard

if you end up on the opposite team as her while playing dodge ball good luck 😓

she's always picked as team captain because literally no one else is excited as she is

she's sorta like Hairo from Saiki K 💀

she gets a lil mad when her teammates don't try

Killjoy

she's in robotics club

she's not very popular but that doesn't bother her at all

she heads straight to and from every class and spends her lunch period in the workshop unless Raze drags her off somewhere

not a lot of people actually know who she is, and if they do they just know her as 'Raze's Friend'

i think she'd remind the teacher about the homework and hit you with the "erm actually 🤓" tbh

Neon

she's on track and field/cross country

after every meet you can find her laying on the floor somewhere ready to puke bc she tries so hard to win 😭

she always ends up top 5 tho

she complains about practice but joins the team every year anyways

she carries her bag around all the time and if you open it there's like 10 water bottles in there

#hydratedqueen

Phoenix

theater kid DUHH

he's probably drama club president or sumn

bro will NOT let go of a specific song from a musical he was in his freshman year and it wasn't even his song 💀

he's been in every show every year and somehow he manages to land every role he wants

he's insanely good at the game 'bang' (mostly because he's louder than everyone else...)

he probably plans/hosts the cast parties too

Raze

she doesn't care much about her grades

she does the bare minimum and gets straight Cs

she's just here to have fun

everyone likes her because of her approachable personality

she doesn't think she's popular but she is

Sage

she's in the medical assistant class

she takes it very seriously, as she plans on going to medical school

even before taking the class she carries a first aid kit and other essentials everywhere she goes

you need a bandaid? ibuprofen? a pad or tampon? she has it all

she's also ASB president

school events literally would not be able to run without her

lets just say her college applications/resume will look REALLY good...

Skye

she also took medical assistant but was less crazy about it than Sage

she just follows her friend's lead

she thinks the skills are useful but she doesn't see herself making it her career

but also I think she would play volleyball

she's a well rounded player but specializes most in defense

still, don't underestimate her bc this girl can SPIKE

Viper

she took every ap science class offered without taking the general ones first

she complains about getting any grade below an A...

"What are you talking about? That test was easy"

sorry not everyone is as smart as you Sabine 😑

she spends all her free time at chem tutoring (even though she doesn't need it)

Yoru

he thinks he looks cool and mysterious when he walks down the halls but he doesn't

everyone just thinks his mad all the time and stay out of his way 😭

randos try to pick fights with him bc he "looked at them wrong" (Yoru wins every time)

he's not exactly a 'quiet kid' but he does lay low when it comes to the social part of school

despite his 'bad boy' look, he has pretty good grades

he's also probably one of those guys that a handful of girls have a crush on but he has no idea

[sweetheartsaku]

HAIKYU!! various ; stupidthings4love

a/n: [gn!reader] HEY POOKIES!!!!!! hopefully u enjoy, working on smt new rn!! stay tuned moas!! on skibidi this was longer in my drafts (rip kuroo who was supposed to be here)

— characters : oikawa, akaashi, atsumu

impatiens !

tooru oikawa ; chit chat - beach weather

clings on to your arm like it's his last day on earth. he's like a damsel in distress!! obsessive gf this, obsessive bf that the o in obsessive is oikawa (I'M JOKING ILY OIKAWA POOKS)

⤷ "y/n-ie... be careful..." "hm? what is it handsome..." you utter softly, noticing his gentle tone. you feel a warm presence beside you. wrapped around your arm, was oikawa looking back at what seemed to be another group of fangirls. you giggle, and take your goodbye's with the friend you were talking to. "my fans might bite your arm off!!" "oikawa, don't be silly. the most they could do is throw me a cookie." "YEAH BUT STILL!!! its a COOKIE!!" you smiled to yourself, imagining a girl throwing a cookie at you and just landing on the floor. "i think i'll be okay." you take notice as he becomes the slightest bit more protective, dipping his hand into the palm of yours and looking back at you, chocolate eyes softened.

oikawa had just finished another game, and you'd usually wait for him to have his little small talk with his fangirls. you didn't really have a problem with it, you could trust him enough. he likes to think you know him better than he does, because you always know or can easily provide what he needs most at times! he really appreciates your trust but oftens questions if he's really doing the right thing. what if him talking to his fangirls made you think you weren't showing enough love to him? and that he valued his fangirls over you? or volleyball? or that girl that dumped him back in highschool because he was too absorbed in volleyb- "bae. are you good??" you raise an eyebrow with a smirk. "i love you." "oh-wow. okay thats sudden.

-i love you too, stupid."

strong believer of sharing literally EVERYTHING. you could be brushing your teeth and he's passed out in the tub or something. shares scarf, clothes, food, everything bro 😭💗

⤷ (timeskip!? i think hehe) finally!! a break from volleyball. who knew THE oikawa tooru would be saying that? the brunette thinks to himself. an argentinian, professional volleyball player. saying that, at his vacay in new york city, with the love of his life. but, its not time to be thinking hard right now. to get the most immaculate and full experience of NYC, was obviously booking first class plane tickets, on the dates that peaked in illuminating the refreshing season of NYC's autumn. there is no volley game in the entire world he would ever trade for this ethereal moment, walking down the streets of new york's bustling hustle, hand in hand, matching diamond rings clinking together. a warm, beige plaid scarf enveloping the both of you. "don't want us getting chilly, huh?" he says, wrapping the scarf around you both.

keiji akaashi ; the adults are talking - the strokes

always lets you win board or card games. situations where he's literally bound to win, he will NOT let you lose. he just wants to see you smile. might hide one of your letters in bananagram, grab an extra card in uno, easy bargain-er in monopoly, adding a piece back on the chess board... if he isn't akaashi ion want him 😊

⤷ it's a late night at the coffee table, akaashi has just finished his shower to sit down for a game of chess with a cup of tea. he could clearly read how slightly more excited you've been to sit down and relax with your fiancé after a long week. he found it the sweetest thing on earth, and he'd never trade it for the world. he loved to see you smile, so why not make you smile now? he thought, hiding his grin through the tension between his fingertips and his king he was about to sacrifice.

"keiji." "yes, love?" "you are very silly." you whisper and lightly giggle, moving your bishop to gently kill your fiancé's king, winning the game. an unconscious, pearly smile plays onto your lips (only he could see, despite the numerous times he's reassured her that it's quite charming).

there's truly nothing he'd want to see more than that.

strong believer of sidewalk rule. don't worry bae y/n will not die nor disappear if you take your eyes off them for like 2 seconds

⤷ his thumb gently rubs your knuckle as you walk down the bustling late night city street, lights of restaurants and streetlamps illuminate all of his features. the bridge of his nose, the dark gunmetal green of his eyes, and the apple of his cheekbones. every single feature that shaped the beautiful boy who had put the ring on your finger. tying your laces, putting your jewellery on, and keeping up with the infamous sidewalk rule. little habits he's built since high school, not because he is expected to do so, but because it all comes naturally when it comes to you.

till suddenly, you feel a squeeze on your warm hand, signalling the usual. the switch of places on the concrete. you instinctually react, akaashi discreetly walking on the side near the moving cars. the little things that aren't so little for you, but the little sparks that keep the warmness in your heart kindled.

atsumu miya ; boyfriend (with social house) - ariana grande, social house

always steals your flippin' last bite. it's so annoying, he knows it, and likes it. while you're not looking, he WILL the last bite of your food or a sip of your favourite drink.

⤷ after a long day at work for you, and a long day of training for atsumu, you both comfortably sit in silence at onigiri miya. the faint noises of clutter and cleaning fill the silence, along with boyfriend by ariana grande and social house, playing over the speaker softly. onigiri miya's open sign had just turned around, and the warm light of the hanging sign outside flickers off. osamu effortlessly places the tray of warm onigiri in front of you two, and a shared smile laces upon your faces.

"thank you!!" you and atsumu chirp in unison, osamu acknowledges your gratitude, and discreetly smiles to himself as he prepares to clean up the kitchen. you both each take one onigiri, automatically knowing who prefers which type of onigiri (atsumu's is the cold tuna, yours can be what you prefer ♡ mine is tuna as well hehe). digging in, suddenly there was only one bite of yours left. mouth still full, you suddenly can't remember if you kept the receipt of your failed custom mug you had purchased the other day. it makes you wonder, then your curiosity takes over you before you could take the last bite of your onigiri! you glace and search into your bag, hand still holding a chunk of onigiri. you sigh of relief, noticing you had kept your receipt! but... something is missing.

your last bite of onigiri.

but, in his so called 𝓅𝓊𝓇𝑒 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓃𝓃𝑜𝒸𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓀𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓈 he will let you have the first bite of his favourite food.

⤷ "aYE! 'tsumu!" you playfully hit his shoulder, as he has an absolute giggle attack. to him, it's like there was genuine fury and fire coming out of your eyes and he found it the most hilarious thing ever LMAO. (but for me personally, i wouldn't take that.) "i wilL ACTUALLY DELETE YOUR FIFA ACCOUNT IF YOU KEEP THIS UP." "oKAYOKAYOKAY!!! i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry pf-" he says as he is STILL having his giggle fit. obviously, the correct reaction is to look away and cross your arms. you do exactly that, and he realises what he's done (caused the next war). he suddenly gets a little touchier, and says "dear y/n-ieee... i promise to give you the first bite of the next food we eat, m'kayyy? from the pure, and innocent kindness of my heart!" he chimes. interrupted by a genuine, heartfelt shout of,

"oh shut yer' trap!"

"SAMU!"

[tiredbitchposts]

HIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!! This is so late but I was so happy when I got the email that you updated your Lestercy fic, like words can not describe how overjoyed I was. Words couldn’t even describe how much I was cackling while reading it too. It made me re-read the whole series again that my head is just full of brainrot right now. 

I would like to say sorry for how long this ask is but THE!! THOUGHTS!!! won’t leave me alone 😭😭😭

Since possessive Percy is canon 👀👀 It made me think of the trend where people kiss their significant other and leave a lot of lipstick marks on them. I can just see Percy giving Lester pepper kisses and leaving behind bright red (lmao maybe blue?) lipstick marks all over his face, and he doesn’t even notice. I like to think that when he finally does notice, he refuses to wash it off (simp behavior right there) which causes a dilemma for him because of his face routine…

Also since Lester is probably gonna meet Posiedon soon (either tied up in a chair or pulled into an alleyway when he least expect it– either way 1st meeting has a high chance that Percy wouldn’t be there) I can just see Posiedon sizing him up and just offering Lester money to break up with Percy bc she definitely deserves better than… that. Then when Lester turns him down, Posiedon gives him ominous warnings. (Posiedon was basically saying he’s dead if he ever breaks Percy’s heart, but to Lester’s mind, that is totally not due to the k-dramas he has watched, he thinks Posiedon is going to try to make Percy fall in love with other people so that she would break up with him). Which then causes Lester to be even more clingy towards Percy and literally watching everything around him like a hawk. He’s contemplating on bringing his bow and arrows whenever he visits Percy now just to shoot the men that come a bit too close, just wondering if they were sent by Posiedon… better safe than sorry 🤷🏻‍♀️

OH! I was just wondering since Bianca is in the series, will you add Nico too?? Because I think it would be funny if Nico gets a puppy crush on Percy and Lester has beef with a literal child….

Again, sorry that this is so long 😭 These thoughts have been plaguing my mind, and I had no one else to share it with. (P.S. idk if the April fools joke was real or not, but I hope you’re doing ok!!! And may the AO3 curse never reach you bc then who else am I supposed to ramble about Lestercy)

Hey! Don't apologize for the long ask, I loved it, actually lost count of the number of times I've re-read It lol

Percy would 100% do that trend, it's a physical need for her to cover her boyfriend with her lipstick and mark her territory...that no one wants to intrude in but try telling her that, love made her blind, I fear.

Yep, Lester would wear those marks as a badge of honor, bro needs to do his skincare routine but his girlfriend covered him with lipstick so now he has to go through the dilema of either letting his acne get worse by not washing his face or wash off the physical manifestation of Percy's love 😔

No spoilers on Poseidon's first meeting with his future son-in-law, but pretty much, yeah. He'll want so bad for them to break up, Percy's his little princess and he was already not that ok with her dating but figured she took too much after him for him to not allow her to have some fun...but did she have to like personality that much? Poseidon has no idea who she got that from

Nico and Lester will have beef, but it's mostly because Nico is pissed that Lester stole his place as Percy's favorite boy 😔

Again, no need to apologize, I loved this ask. Yeah, that wasn't a prank, I really went through surgery on April 1rst lol. I'm ok though! I had to remove my thyroid due to that illness that starts with C and ends with R but I'm completely healed and now I have a sick neck scar so everything's great! Thank you for the worry

[sharpth1ng]

“And after tomorrow? They’ll be the only ones left; no Randy, no Tatum, no fucking Sidney, no one else in the way-“

in the way of WHAT, Billy? 😭 Billy needs a- what are those things? Insider look, IDK, but it like explains whats going on in bros head- skdjrj-

What are your “FRIENDS” getting in the way of?! You’re already a murderer and tbh i dont think ANYONE could’ve prevented you n stu from getting together- yall are like predestined, or inevitable or some shit.

Plz send help this dude is a fucking wacko, i love him, but jesus. 😭

I mean realistically they aren't getting in the way of anything, you're totally right.

I dont even think Billy's fully aware of it but what's in the way for him is his own perception of their expectations of him. Like part of his resentment of Sid is this feeling that she's forcing him to try and be a good boyfriend (she's not, and also he's a terrible boyfriend). He doesn't feel able to be himself because doing that would require him to confront other peoples reactions to him.

Theres a part of that that I can be sympathetic to- it would be very difficult if not dangerous to come out in a relatively small town in the mid 90s. This obviously doesn't excuse any of his behaviour but i do think that part is worth mentioning. Its still not always safe for people to come out almost 30 years later.

Theres a lot of expectations on him to be a kind of man that he isn't, that he doesn't even feel able to fake being, and he takes his (justified) anger about that out (in unjustified ways) on people who aren't responsible for it.

I also think theres a not insignificant amount of envy happening. He perceives life to be relatively easy for other people, he even does this with Stu (sees him as more socially capable, more able to fit in). He holds a mistaken perception that other people do fit the roles they've been assigned, that they aren't experiencing the same mismatch he is. This is particularly absurd when it comes to Sid, a character I also see as gay.

It's not super explicit but I think the contrast between Sid in the first movie and Sid in the second movie shows her wrestling with expectations around femininity and womanhood. In the first movie she breaks all the final girl rules (no drinking, no sex), and over the course of the movie we see her take less and less shit.

By the second movie she's dropped a lot of the softer feminine identifiers she had in the first movie- she cuts her hair short, and she's wearing darker colours, she's wearing a leather jacket. None of this is to devalue classically feminine aesthetics or long hair btw, and its not like Sid becomes a butch king, but I think its possible those things weren't really her in the first place, so the aesthetic change we see is her being more herself.

Of course Billy doesn't get to see this change in her, but it seems obvious to me that she's also grappling with the expectations society has for her, and she doesn't fit into them easily the way he thinks she does.

The social expectations that Billy thinks others have for him feel like a burden, just having to interact with them and not be an asshole feels like a burden to him. He doesn't like having to filter his anger (which he mostly does unsuccessfully anyways), but he doesn't recognize that he could deal with the anger itself instead of bottling it up. He doesn't recognize that there are healthy ways of letting anger out and instead he directs indiscriminately it at everyone in his radius.

So yeah lmao, tl;dr Billy needs therapy

[burquillos]

I have a hot take that Bakugou would be universally beloved if he was a woman because people would see his initial bullying as similar to Nagatoro.

Which is still a horrible misreading, but part of me would prefer it if bakugou haters read him like that rather than thinking he wouldn't hate his past self telling Deku to jump off the school.

In my head, Kacchan is already universally beloved☺️💕 (but that's just my circle + a decade of local and international popularity polls) I understand what you are saying 😅😅😔😔💔💔

Kacchan and Hayacchi are so very similar as the biggest fake idgafers who is all bravado but is actually very sensitive (constantly pointed out by both mangas). They have amazing battle prowess but got too comfortable at the position they are in to improve. The loser nerd mc is what challenges and inspires them to 'fight back' and become a better version of themselves which is like- I can't believe Naoto-senpai and Hayacchi are actually proper rivals bro, they're not even on the same field😭 but I love LOVE that of them.

Anyways! I think a big part of why people accept Hayacchi more is, first and foremost, the genre.

more under the break cause I have a LOT of things to say😭

The title says exactly what you need to expect, so it's not (outwardly!!) subverting any tropes unlike Shonen Battle MHA (who has been known for trope subversion since the beginning?? But people seem to ignore what made it so different and refreshing back then now??)

Both characters break their facade very early on. Like, episode 1 💀 when Hayacchi feels bad for pushing senpai and asks him if he never gets angry + Kacchan getting publicly humiliated with the sludge villain incident and feeling horrible for being praised while Deku gets reprimanded for saving him.

But you kinda expect it from Hayacchi cause she is Girl in Girl-Boy love story and it's extremely subtle with Kacchan if you don't have a critical eye and only see him as a rival trope who Will Turn Evil in the future.

The other more sinister reason is that people just inherently see women as more "harmless" and always downplay their deeds.

[A big reason why I know some people who are very happy Kacchan is NOT a girl because they know that dudebros will make everything she does only about liking Deku and completely ignore her character arc as a Hero and actions outside of it💀💀

And oh boy I have seen so much of this in genshin with the aether harem fans in particular reducing every female character to nothing but a yandere waifu vying for a man's attention + people reducing momo ayase THE PROTAGONIST into just A Hot Girl slobbering over Okarun and ignoring everything else about her too. It's tough out here bro😭😭😭

And I fear, the Ocha-Bakugo love rivalry will be EVEN worse than it is now and the very beautiful, life-changing UA Sports Fest battle will be reduced to nothing but a catfight over Deku and even more dire is that they end up like the Aether-harem💀💀💀 I couldn't bear that ಥ⁠_⁠ಥ]

But yeah, point is, while it might be true that a fem Kacchan would get people's dick harder and their heart's softer, she would also be prone to even more horrible misreadings💀

Moving on, I don't really have an ending stance in particular. I will love Kacchan as the Best Girl-coded man he is right now and I will fight for my life in the trenches with dudebros if he was an actual female character in the shonen genre😭😭

[ma3mae]

No one likes syringes!

Summary : You gotta take your weekly syringe but you're afraid of needles so how can these mfs (Dazai, Kunikida, Atsushi, Aku, Chuuya) convince you to take it 🤷

Genre : bit cracky and fluff, prob lots of teasing bc u know who tf im talking about 💀

Warnings : heartattacks bc we all simp too hard for these men 🛐 maybe a bit of suggestive themes at the end

A/N : managed to inject myself for the first time (aint no drugs, need them bc HEALTH) and bro, my hands r still shaky bc fear 😭 how do ppl do this so easily 💀 also the syringe is like a pen (also for this story) but broo its still scary and i need some bsd character comforting me 😩✋✋

Dazai Osamu

Lets say yall live together and hes at work while u r home alone

cant bring yourself to do it alone bc bro syringes are scary (even if its just a pen bc NEEDLES BRO) 😩😭

So you text him and ask what hes doing and tell him if hes got time to come home asap bc we r nearly crying at this point

hes gonna be SO ANNOYING like "i was just waiting for a text from you~ dont worry, your knight in shining armor will save you"

BROO he prob knew that you gotta take them today and also knew that nothing would be going on at the agency so he couldve stayed at home but nah 😭😭 (sadistic a** fr fr)

but hes still hurrying nonetheless bc hes not that MEAN -right???-

arrives at home and finds you on the couch holding the pen with shaky hands and his heart does feel a TAD bit guilty bc fr he couldve stayed at home and u would have gotten this shit over asap

gon be all like "dw im here now, okay? Lets just get this over with and then we'll cuddle, how about that?"

homegirl is about to cry at this point bc just FREE HER from this misery

sits next down to you and takes the pen from your hands

If you do wanna try it out yourself, he'll gently guide you through it

He knows how afraid you are and teasing would just make you sob instantly bc the pressure is already too much to deal with YEAH U BETTER STFU U TEASE !! jk still love him

will try to change your mind tho by sayinf stuff like "Really? ~ i mean its brave and good of you to try it yourself but I really love helping you, you know. Want to do everything for you, darling." he knows EXACTLY what hes doing to us by saying that

Is prob gonna give us that look and whisper in our ear and shi im sorry im too down bad for this man at this point 😩

if you dont wanna do it yourself then, he'll tell you to look at him while hes pressing the pen onto your thigh or stomach

You still cant keep your eyes off of it? Sry girl, theres only one solution

He'll just click his tounge at you while having that fking smirk on his face as he says "still too distracted, I see? Well seems like theres only one way to help you"

gives you a kiss on the lips and just deepens it while looking STRAIGHT into your eyes got my knees weak for him fr

you only feel a tiny sting and as soon as a "click" is heard, he'll break the kiss and just grins at you as if he didnt trick you lol

but who are you to complain, he sees that you liked it and will def comment on that

"see, love? Wasn't so hard after all. But you still did well. Proud of you as always"

pecks you on the lips again before setting the pen onto the table and wraps his arms around your waist bc NO WAY in hell is he gonna let go after that

"i think i deserve a reward for that~" "you said you were waiting for a text so you KNEW i had to do it today, right?" ".... welp, not gonna apologize on that 🤷🤷🤷"

u can understand why kunikida has to SIGH all the time as soon as dazai opens his mouth but oh well, you're too whipped to care about at this point

wont let you go so guess you'll have to reward him 💅 no ones complaining LOL

if you tell him to help you next time before hes gone for work, he'll def do it bc he loves u but poor kunikida gotta expect him arrive at work late more often bc he wont leave home without rewards 🛐

Kunikida Doppo

You already know that he got the exact day, hour, minute and SECOND written down on when you gotta take your pen

You tell him that the day is enough and that the time doesnt matter but NOO 😤 YOU WILL take it at the exact time

If its at ungodly hours like 3am or smth, bro he'll wake you up like no mercy for his schedule 😭

If u complain to him tho then dw he will rearrange it for u bc he may love to stick to his plans but he wont ignore your needs and stuff either get urself a man who takes care of u like that 😤😤

will prefer to do it before work, so if you're not an early bird then he'll wake u up but dw you'll get a forehead kiss and bro's already fully dressed n' stuff BUT waking up to him looking at you with such a loving gaze will make u forget that its 5-6am or smth 😩

will first let you get up in peace and make u some calming tea bc he knows what will come next ✋

"Y/N, I know you don't like it but you have to take your pen today, okay?"

if we start a tanthrum then he already knows about it like bro's prepared for everything!!

"Kuni, do we really ha-" "Yes." "But you know I dont li-" "Yes and yes. I know you hate it but don't worry, I've already written everything down on how to do it and what to be aware of so its okay to feel afraid but don't worry because I'm here. Nothing will happen and I've already bought your favorite snacks so you'll feel better but dont eat too much of it when I'm gone. "

u already know he spent a night or smth just researching everything about it as soon as you told him

prob even went to a library and once came back home with multiple books in his hands, hes THAT dedicated UGH I LOVE HIM 💕

you could just sob rn bc how did the earth bless you with this man KUNIKIDA I NEED U 😭😭😭

If the pen is kept in a fridge then dw he already put that shit out for it to not be cold anymore (prob counted the minutes and seconds LOL)

he'll sit you down on the bed or couch, disinfect the place on where you'll take it (lol that sounds WRONG) and he'll give you a peck on your forehead before asking if you're alright and ready to go through with it bc no way in hell is he gonna do it while you're too shaken up for it

If you wanna try to do it alone then he'll take your hand into his as you're grabbing the pen, slowly guiding it while praising you for how brave you are for trying this and that hes proud of you IM SOBBING

will also tell you to look at him if you get more afraid by seeing it on your skin

Honestly even if you dont wanna do it yourself, he'll make sure to be there and will praise you every time you get through with it bc you KNOW he means it

Honestly makes you tear up everytime and u just wanna kiss this man fr

you thank him and tell him how glad you are to have him, he'll be smitten even more than he already is

Cup his face with your hands and kiss him bro's gonna find it really difficult to not stay at home and just be in your arms

at the end of the day, his love for you exceeds his ideals so he wouldnt mind arriving at work some minutes later if he gets to have you in his arms for a bit longer

Will arrive at work with such a good mood that hes prob gonna freak dazai out with it especially when he overlooks some dumb remarks from him the power of love YALL but who can blame him, his heart is thumping louder than dazai's rambling LOL

maybe yall will continue when hes back home, who knows 🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐

Nakajima Atsushi

when you told him about the pen for the first time, he was literally thrown off like "wait, so you have to.... stab yourself regularly with that?????"

hes just SO precious bc his heart's squeezing at you asking him if he could help u bc you just feel so comfortable and just knowing that makes him SWOON

But at the same time hes panicking bc HOW CAN HE DO THAT WITHOUT HURTING U

Ngl hes prob also afraid of needles and stuff 😭 is gonna look at u like the pic above LOL

will ask yosano or even recommend that she should do it but you're like "NO!! im sorry, tsushi but im too scared of her and i feel safe with u :(((("

you got him WHIPPED and DEDICATED bc he'll def research that shit through and through

Will ask his coworkers (prob kunikida) how to best handle the situation

has everything ready but will stumble and be kinda hastily about it at first bc hes prob even more nervous than you are 💀

either it implifies your fear more or its just so ridiculous that you're legit like "ily but im not gonna die or smth 🤨🤨🤨" you cant blame him tho 😤

hes gonna be all like "OKAY OKAY, we got this. No, I GOT this s-so no worries, okay?" bro, BREATHE. Hes just about to pass out at this point jk jk

if you decide to try it out alone, he'll be a bit saddened bc does this mean you dont want him to help you after all?? :(( was he not good enough of a choice to be of help :((( TSUSHI STFU ILY

dw just reassure him that you obviously appreciate his help and still need him to be there bc no way in hell can u do it alone without ur hubby

will tell you everything he had learned about the pen and how to use it with a bit of a tremble in his voice but he pulls through with it!!

You manage to do it and BOY get ready for a rant on how proud of you he is

will want to pamper you with kisses on ur face "tsushi, i know that look. Go ahead and do it, dont hold back" "really, y/n!!?" "😩 bro do it ok" will try to hold back with gluing himself onto you but how can he NOT

If u dont wanna do it urself then it will prob go like this:

its time for yk what and he sees the genuine fear in your eyes but dw he got you

hes prob gon be like "my s/o need me rn and i have to help them!!!" hes actually gonna remember everythinf he looked up and prob memorized for you bc hes AN ANGEL will put his forehead against yours and tell you to look at him "i wont let anything hurt you and happen to you. You're afraid and honestly im afraid too but you and i will get through this, okay?" gives you the most lovestruck smile ever before he looks down and counts to three

"breathe in, y/n. It will be okay" he ignores his slightly trembling hands and at the count of three inserts it. GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE GUTTER📸📸📸

as soon as yall hear a click, he quietly counts to three before pulling it out and BROO the relief is refreshing af

"WE DID IT, Y/N!!!" Is hella giddy bc how can he not be proud of the both of you!!!! You did it!!! will honestly pull you in a hug bc hes just so happy

prob gonna realise that he just did it without asking u and will be sheepish all like "o-oh sorry, i just got too excited" "no tsushi. We should be happy about this so dont let go!!" no need to say it twice bc hes gonna wrap his arms even tighter around you and nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck ILL GIVE U A KISS TSUSHI 🛐🛐

will he feel bad for arriving at work a bit later? Maybe but a scolding from kunikida wont hold him back from holding you for a tad bit longer

He'll be a bit less nervous for the next times and it will surely decrease with each time bc practice yk but will obviously still hold you until he made sure that you're feeling okay afterwards

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke

Bro's nearly flabbergasted bc why are you making such a FUSS 🤨🤨 im sry dont sue me

"Calm down, you idiot. It's only a pen. You dont even SEE the needle."

dont ask him why hes staying with you if its JUST a needle then bc bro will prob just straight up get up and leave if you point it out 💀

will prob be the first to not even suggest but just TELL you to do it yourself aku im hurting over here 😩

will prob make an effort in atleast roughly skimming through a website about it prob smth weird like wikihow LMAO

If he does see you how afraid you really are of it, hes rly trying his best to ignore the small ache its giving his heart bc he takes no pleasure in witnessing u be so afraid✋ its still JUST a pen in his eyes at the end of the day lol

will just sigh and snatch that shit from your hands bc he cant bear to see you like this any longer are we looking that pitiful, probably LOL

But he'll be surprisingly soft with his touch, nearly just ghosting you with his hands is that even a term, nvm yall know what i mean

Hes just gonna be straightforward with it bc the faster its over the better. He wont admit that he just wants to help but cant convey it bc what even are feelings 🤷

He'll tilt your chin towards him and just say "Look at me, Y/N. Stop overthinking it. You won't get hurt from this stupid thing, okay? If smth does happen, I'll just destroy the factory thats making this."

You dont know if hes joking to lighten the mood or if hes serious bc its aku

But hes prob joking

anyway hes gonna ask you like smth rly random like "What do you wanna eat later" which will confuse you but you'll answer nonetheless bc hey hes initiating a convo!!

as you start to talk and he notices you're relaxed enough for him, welp yk whats happening

Actually makes you wince a bit bc it just caught you off guard

"Ryuu, what the f-?!" "Just bear with it." ok we have been silenced 🛐

yall hear the click of relief, he counts in his mind to three and quickly pulls that shit out

you're slightly trembling from relief from finally getting it over you and bro just clicks his tounge like "You're such a fool. Cant believe something insignificant like that makes you nearly shit your pants."

you lowkey glare at him for that bc BRO needles r spooky 😭 but dw before you even open your mouth to tell him off, he'll look to the side and say "... You did good for holding that out though... but its still stupid."

just give him a peck on the cheek or smth bc this boy is prob craving some praise after having helped you like that

"Thank you, Ryuu. I couldnt have done this without you. You're the best boyfriend I could ever ask for"

Give him a tight hug, kiss and boom you got him around your finger

he'll take a second to wrap his arms around you and will just hide his face in the crook of ur neck like our other boy tsushi

"Of course, I'd help... I'll still blow up the factory for scaring you like that."

"NO!!" jk he wont if u tell him not to but hes just trying to say he doesnt like seeing u like that we know aku, dw 💕💕

if his coworkers ask why hes arriving a bit later at work, he'll just tell them to shut up and continue with their work

If you look closely you'll see his ears turn a bit pink as he keeps thinking of you and your words 💕💕😭

Nakahara Chuuya

Honestly its gonna be a mix of every reaction possible I think

Like if you tell him about the pen, hes first gonna feel a bit pressured like "O-Oh wait so you want ME to help with it??"

Like no offense hes obviously feeling pretty happy about that you are asking him for help especially for smth important as your health

But he knows hes not the most gentle person and does have his worries that he might accidentally hurt you or smth

wont ask anyone for advice bc its his love of his life can i be that pls that asked HIM so he'll do it at the end of the day!!

but if hes feeling rly unsure then he wont mind slipping a question about it when hes reporting to mori

which means being not subtle at all

"So was that all for today's report of the mission." "Yeah." "Then do you need something or why are you still standing there?" ".... *pulls out a picture of your pen* do you know how to use this?..."

you def know that chuuya's feeling so embarassed that hes asking his BOSS but its a sacrifice hes willing to pay

mori will have mercy on him and tell him what he should be careful of and summarise on how to use it

Will prob throw in a "good luck~" bc how can u not TEASE him

anyway our boy's done his research and now comes the hard part

"Okay, dont panic Y/N." "HOW CAN I NOT WHEN YOU'RE HOLDING IT LIKE YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME" "JUST DONT PANIC, FFS"

dw as soon as he sees you trembling, he'll be softer than a marshmallow

a chuuya one

"Oi, look at me. I'll make sure nothing's gonna happen to you, alright? Will just sting a bit and thats it. Will take care of you after this so you'll forget this ever happened."

HOW CAN U NOT SWOON AT HIM 😩😩

he'll even take off his gloves so you'll be more relaxed if you can feel his skin bro the gloves are giving off doctor vibes in this scenario, will make us panic more LOL

if you really cant keep your eyes off it then well....

"Damn it, love. Stop looking at it." will just press his lips onto you for a second before breaking it and inserting that shi*

"Ch-Chuuya!" "I know, i know. Dont worry, its gonna be over real soon."

And boom thr click is heard and yall are finally done

Honestly his shoulders are gonna relax instantly, boy was tensed up even more than you skskskks but who can blame him

"OMG chuuya we did it!!" "Yeah, you did it, doll." bro's gonna latch onto you again bc that kiss from earlier wasnt enough for the both of u 😩

is it riling yall up? Probably but welp you 're already either shirtless or pantless so only one clothing to pull off less work for yall

Mori's just gonna be like "I see, you managed to get through it" and chuuya just tiltd his fedora down so u cant see his face bc he REALLY wants to ignore that his boss knows whats been holding our boy up cant blame him 🤷🤷🤷

***************

Lol that was WAY too long but honestly this was so good to write 😩 now im just gonna be sad that none of them r here to do it irl but oh welp, will just read more stuff about them ✋💅

[lovelykil]

─Headcanons─

kyle x reader older ver.

hc; reader who cries during sex

cw; slight? nsfw

note; (based off the request) okay doing kyle bc he's my bby girl ⤵

bro is so WORRIED and panicking

his immediate reaction is to stop and check on you to see of you're okay

"Y/n are you okay?? Does it hurt that bad? I mean we can just stop of you're uncomfortable, I-"

"no no I'm okay-! I'm just nervous.. We're literally about to do it and I'm crying on the spot oh my god this is embarrassing." 🤕

He thinks he's HURT you or something but it's just your nerves acting up

Like this one time

You actually suggested wanting to 'make love' the fancy way he likes you to put it instead of sex, cause it just sounds vulgar and eww

anyway he was on the couch on his phone, parents weren't home and you were hungry for him

not literally

but dick

you get?

you understand what

yeah, okay moving on

You crawled over to him on the couch and nudged his arm, getting his attention.

"hm?"

"hey."

"hi."

"you look like you need your dick sucked rn"

"🧍"

2 minutes later after convincing the ginger and teasing he finally gave in with a flush.

"here on the couch?"

"shi, I didn't know you was a freak like that."

"NO IM ASKING"

"ohh sure" 💁🏾‍♀️

He's sitting on the couch with his hands pinned to the sides of him, hesitantly watching you carefully pull the strings to his sweats. On your knees upon him, though you would stop mid-way as the tie just started to get loose.

Breaking into a cold sweat and swallowing hard.

Kyle looked at you confused and worried something might've been wrong.

"Y/n are you okay?" He asked.

You stared down at the tie starting to attempt to untie it again but very much struggling to do so as you sniffled to yourself.

Why the fuck was this tie so hard to UNTIE all of a sudden your fingers couldn't just do the simple task of untying something 💔💔

Tears swelled your eyes, your cheeks burning up overall body temp burning up. You felt like you were gonna lose it

BECAUSE OF A TIE??

well no

not really

you're soo nervous..

😭😭

why be confident then all of a sudden turn into a big pussy 😒

I'm jk but fr

Kyle kept staring trying to come up with something to say but you looked up at him slowly, a tear rolling down your cheek.

"Holy shit Y/n, baby are you oka-"

"I wanted to suck your dick but I'm too nervous now.." 😕☹️

Kyle blinks, he's obviously so confused but can't help but giggle at your mood switch. He brings his hand to his mouth to cover up the little laugh.

"awe y/n- you don't have to do it if you don't wanna.. come here baby.." He reassured in a caring tone, grabbing your hand.

He brings you onto the couch with him to hug as you weeped

You held onto him as he cuddled you, rubbing your back to soothe you but still you could just tell he was holding back from laughing further.

"I know you're laughing.."

"what? no!"

it's silent for a second before he snickers. You groan leaning off of him.

"Okay okay! I'm sorry its JUST THAT-"

"omg you're an ass.." you sniffled, wiping away tears from your embarrassed face.

He brings you back toward him to hug you tight, trying to show you he cares.

not like he just laughed in your face

noo

I'm jk he would never (maybe) okay it depends but

He lays a kiss on your head, wiping away the final tears off your face.

"It's okay to be nervous I get it."

"Yeah I know."

"..what's that supposed to mean"

"mm.. nothing anyway.."

Kyle's also nervous asf when it's comes to

SEX

I mean

"making love" 🤓☝🏾

yall fr best match

but he doesn't cry during it 😭 unless you're giving him like heavenly top

Then okay I guess he'd have some tears in his eyes

I'm going off topic UHHH 🤳🏽

there was another time where yall was just fooling around you know 😚💁🏾‍♀️

then things lead to another and WOAH he's rubbing his member against your lips (other one )

You start to feel that sinking feeling in your stomach almost like you were going to throw up, I mean you were totally ready for him to ruin your insides omfg nothing more you wanted right now but

OH WOW

your nerves.

just as when he was about to put it in he saw a tear roll down your face, avoiding his contact.

He quickly felt so disgusted with himself, was he hurting you? What if you didn't want this? Maybe he took it the wrong way.

he's so careful and cautious yet so frantic as he asks what's wrong while his hands go to cuff your face softly.

"Yes what? No I'm okay I'm just like anxious.. I'm sorry I didn't mean to stress you out."

poor baby thinks he's making you uncomfortable

[ooglyboooglybitxh]

Since y'all asked😭:

𝐍𝐚𝐡𝐢𝐫 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬

mom!shuri, mom!reader reader & shuri’s child

contains: HOLY FLUFF, a little bit of angst, kissing mentioned

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

————————————————————

[]: Born: Nahir M/N Udaku, July 23, 2022, 4 pounds, Sex: Male, Blood Type, AB positive, Allergies: None

[]: He has Y/n’s long frizzy hair and Shuri’s face. Like if you were to look at both of them side by side you’d think they’re twins

[]: He can eat spicy shit, i mean it comes from his Dominican and African side. So he aint really phased by it

(A/N: bro the other day my mom flamed me for not finding anything spicy and she said: “Thats bc your nigerian mf, you are from africa” 💀 and idk really eat african food fr so i wouldn’t know if it’s spicy or not😭)

But anyways💀 back 2 the headcanon

[]: If he wakes up before Shuri and Y/n he’ll climb out his crib and get on the bed and start bothering them until they give him his needs. He’ll tug on Y/n’s hair and hit Shuri.

[]: he LOVES Riri and Riri ADORES him. If Shuri and Y/n need a break she’ll always be willing to take him unless she’s busy.

[]: He will NOT go to sleep without his turtle plushie and if the turtle’s being washed he’ll probably be willing to sleep with one of his spider man plushies but usually Y/n washes his plushies together at the same time. So he won’t go to sleep until their done washing.

[]: he LOVESSSSS baths especially when he gets to use the bubbles, oh yep- its a wrap he’ll be in there for about 20 mins tops. after his done getting his bath he’ll play until he has to get out.

[]: He has this like thing for turtles… he loves them why?. Only God knows.

[]: The first time he ever stepped into Shuri’s Lab. God this boy didnt keep still at all he kept touching everything.

____________________________________

*Nahir giggles* as he crawls around Shuri’s lab

he crawls over to the molding station and Shuri immediately snatches him away from the area

“NO! shit, here just sit by me ok?…stay” Shuri says sitting him down on the chair next to her station, trying to keep him away from dangerous things and objects around the lab.

Shuri turns back to the console now completely focused on the console. Nahir sneaks away quietly and crawls to the hallway

“Panther, Nahir is in the hallway” Griot says warning Shuri

Shuri immediately runs after Nahir and grabs him from behind

*Nahir giggles* at Shuri’s firm hands tickling him while she picks him up

“Where are you going?. Eh, little one?” she says putting her on the same chair.

She stares at him for a second slowly turning back to the console and Nahir tries to move again but Shuri catches him

“Aht Aht” She grunts grabbing him as she gets an idea

She adjusts her Kimoyo Beads to Child Mode, as she does this her child reaches for her wrist wondering what the thing is glowing on her wrist

“Ehh” Nahir whines reaching for his mother

“Hang on” Shuri reassures him

She slides the beads off her wrists and gently grabs her son’s wrists, gently sliding them onto his.

“mmm” Nahir coos becoming interested in the beads tapping on them

Shuri does know how but he opens a game after a couple more taps, thinking she would have to turn on the game for him

“Brilliant..” She says as her eyes widen

She smiles softly at her son’s quick wits figuring out how to work the Kimoyo Beads at 7 MONTHS!?.

maybe just maybe….. he’d be as smart as his mother one day. As she thinks that her smile grows wider kissing her son’s forehead.

____________________________________

[]: When ever he gets angry at Y/n he’ll nudge into her or hit her and Y/n makes a death face at Nahir. And in fright he’ll coo into her or hug her basically apologizing

“yeah thats what i thought”

————————————————————

[]: He watched Lilo & Stitch and boy he lovesssss Stitch after he watched it he was pretending to be Stitch

____________________________________

“iiiii” Nahir yells flopping around on the bed

Shuri and Y/n chuckles

Y/n checks her phone:

10:09 pm

“Time for bed mhijo” (son) Y/n says to Nahir.

“ehhh” Nahir whines and pouts

____________________________________

[]: Y/n and Nahir stay up late often to watch tv and eat snacks while Shuri sleeps through all the noise knowing it’s them causing racket.

[]: If a character in a movie is sad or something he’ll go: “aww” which is so adorable to witness 🥹🥹

[]: whenever he has nightmares in the middle of the night he’ll cry loudly, waking up his parents

if its Shuri she’ll immediately jump out her sleep and pick him up

“Shhhh its okay unyana i’m here stop crying its ok”(son) Shuri says trying to calm down her son she picks up his turtle plush and tries to give it to him.

If its Y/n she’ll grab him, lay him on her chest and rub his back.

“It's ok Mhijo“ she says rubbing his back

---------------------------------------------

[]: He hates it when Shuri and Y/n Kiss. Like he actually loathes that shit😭. If he’s near them when they kiss he’ll yell and hit the both of them😭. If he’s far away he’ll throw something at them and NOT MISS!!!😤

[]: So he has this “My Friend Miles Morales” plushie that if you squeeze that chest he talks and makes noises. He hates that shit. So Shuri notice this and when he was taking a nap she took the plushie down to her lab and removed the voice box and when he noticed the voice box was out he was so happy. And Shuri’s heart warmed over the feeling of knowing her son was so happy

————————————————————

I am so sorry if this was too short😭

tbh i don’t like writing short shit bc it just makes me feel weird like idk😭

but if yall enjoyed that PLEASE DON’T BE AFRAID TO DM ME FOR REQUESTS

but dont be spamming ma shi tho😹

-💙 @ooglyboooglybitxh

[mothmans-wedding-photographer]

Mothman's Buffy rewatch: Season 4, episodes 9, 10, and 11, "Something Blue", "Hush", and "Doomed"

Something Blue

The lesbian alliance sbebejsjje

"Yes. I am a lesbian" as a lesbian I find this absolutely hysterical I'm ngl like usually it's annoying when men joke about being lesbians like "say you're a lesbian girl me too" but I think the difference is 1. He's not saying that to hit on a lesbian and 2. Buffy brought it up as a joke first

Also his delivery lmaoo

Honestly I do generally like Riley at this point in the season, and he does genuinely seem healthier for Buffy than at least Angel (still not over how he let's his friends talk about her though)

"I wonder where I get that from?" Girl I'm gonna hold your hand while I tell you this

Oh my god the mug!!! The best mug!!! I went to this little pottery painting place and recreated it. I should've put my hot chocolate in that mug while I watched this episode

"Giles help! He's gonna scold me!" Crying

Buffy 😭😭 I love when everyone bullies Spike

Spike being more attuned to Willow's feelings is sending me

I drive for fun sometimes. I then I get tired and I prefer to have my dad drive me. I love going for drives

Aww see this is actually sweet of Riley I think if they kept him this way, with a few tweaks I would have considered him the healthiest ship option for Buffy

Drinking away fer feelings :(

Lmao I forgot about rat Amy (despite all her rage she is still just a rat in a cage)

Girl what are you doing this seems like a bad idea

It's the intro part!!!

Aw it's nice that Giles came to check on her

Giles she only missed one thing give her a break

Well she messed up his vision I'm sure this won't have negative consequences

NOOO AMY

Gets unrated for one second before immediately going back

Yeah Willow you still don't want him running free

Buffy looks so confused I'm crying

Oh my god

CRYING SBBEJAKDNELSNDJKE

Oh it's so weird to see Buffy happy like that

"You're a demon magnet" aw shit that's not gonna be great. Also super mean to say come on Willow

"Mr. and Mrs. Big Pile of Dust"

Awww she wants Giles to give her away 🥹

Giles is suffering and so am I

"I don't even really like him" crying

Oh my god what the hell

Oh right demon magnet

I think it would have been funnier if the demons were physically stuck to him like he was actually a magnet

Anya's twitching face sbsbebjsd

"Can I be blind too?"

These people are so mean to Willow. God forbid she doesn't get over her first long-term relationship quickly and she wants to vent to her friends

Like calling it her "poor-me moodswings"? What a bitchy thing to say

Oh cool demon guys

"Girl power bit" you literally can't fight and she's the SLAYER

"I am sorry to hear that. Oh well. Here's my talisman if you change your mind give me a call" CRYING new favourite demon on this show

AU where she actually does agree to work with them they seem pretty chill

"Spike lips! Lips of Spike!"

Ah guilt cookies

Bro doesn't even get a cookie 😭

Oh nevermind

"OH GOD RILEY THINKS IM ENGAGED"

Hush

Hush time!! Love this episode, perfect for spooky season

This scene is odd, why would she need Buffy on the table?

Oh they're kissing this is a dream

Creepy children yaay

"You're gonna die screaming but you won't be heard" good foreshadowing

Gentleman jumpscare

Willow's gonna do the thing guys

The height difference is sending me SMG is so short

Ruining the moment Buffy

I bet they're Initiative papers

Spike just walking free now

Spike loves his wheatabix

Spike GET YOUR FILTHY GRAVE SHOES OFF THE COUCH

Ok to be fair he makes jokes always like it's his thing it's not personal

They're squabbling

Witch time I guess

TARA TARA TARA

"No offense" after the most offensive thing

Tara knows that Willow knows about magic hehe

Good transition, shows how they're on the same wavelength but they don't think they are

What happens if Xander's mom comes downstairs and sees a man tied to a chair

She's appeared before right? Giles' gf?

Stealing voices hehe

How does he know when all the voices are in the box? Vibes?

Weirdness

Spike does the iconic gift where he gives the British middle finger

Blames Spike immediately

Ah yes, call someone on the phone when you can't speak

Riley breathing heavily on the panel I'm crying

Him writing "come on, come on" just to be silly

Board guy was so quick to profit off of this 😭😭

Awww wholesome Giles and Willow moment

Oh my god btvs has anti vaccers

I feel like they could also blame mass hysteria. That's like the go to for unexplainable events

Casually breaks this man's wrist

Why is there a trash fire like why would decide to do that

Riley and Buffy kiss yippee?

They're floating sndbdbns

Oh I forgot about the freaky little guys with the straitjacket and the weird movements

Oh that would scare the shit out of me

Do you think the shortest Gentleman gets bullied by the others

RIP that guy

Their gestures are so polite

"Flesh squelching" thank you subtitles

Three hearts already

Olivia's a good artist

DANSE MACABRE!!!

I remember my elementary school teachers using those projectors

"Boobs?"

I love how he uses pictures for emphasis

Anya is so entertained

BUFFY THE GESTURE

Pulls out the stake

Willow's cute little death face

Well she tried

BUFFY WILL PATROL TONIGHT!!!!!

Oh I like Tara's room

Go Tara go the gentlemen can only float slowly buy the thralls are faster

I understand why no one is opening the door but that would be scary as shit for Tara

Oh my god of course it's Willow

Nvm

Oh that one has the creepiest smile

Buffy and Riley see each other having magic

Or naur sjdbejandnej

Hey at least this proves that Xander cares about Anya

ANYA NOT THE TIME

Oh she's gonna move it with her mind

Oh my gosh they're using their witch powers together

Gay people!!!!

Oh man those guys are reveling in the fear they cause

He looks so proud of himself crying 😭😭 no girl the box

I was not expecting their blood to be green

Aww Willow and Tara finally get to talk

"I thought you were just being pretentious" "oh I was"

Giles one of the original members of Pibk Floyd 😭😭

Ends in silence... they can talk but they choose not to

Doomed

Picks up right where Hush left off

Hostile Subterestials

Corn-fed Iowa boy

"She who hangs out a lot in cemeteries"

Bro doesn't know what a slayer is point and laugh

Amy does not like his vibes

Nevermind earthquake or something

Yeah Spike should help out actually they're the reason he can still get blood

Lmao Spike sjdrbbeje

The way the neutering works is so inconsistent, first he can hit someone it just also hurts him, now he just has to what? Have the intention of hurting them?

The slayer being a boogeyman figure foe demons is a cool concept

Percy!!!!

Laurie is so short😭😭 and also passive aggressive

Damn we need doppelganger Willow to beat him up again

How do you not feel a body next to you

WHY DOES THAT LOOK LIKE BILL CYPHER?? LIKE IT LOOKS LIKE IT HAS A SKINNY HAT I think that might just be the way the blood pooled though. And eye and a triangle is a pretty common demon thing

Get his entitled ass Xander!!

Cereal boxes of death I'm crying

Honestly Riley is probably the normal-est possibility for a long-term relationship for Buffy

I like the going back and forth scenes here, and how Riley assumes the monster just kills for fun, but the Scoobies know better

Spike tries and fails to kill himself

Don't call her stupid that's not gonna help you get the girl

Idk i judge people who think killing and experimenting on things is fun

Calling her "self-involved" stfu Riley

I highly disagree with Spike tbh like Willow especially is important for studying and finding out what the monsters are, so Buffy can defeat them. You can argue that Giles does that, but there's been multiple times where Willow catches things that he misses. Also she knows magic now, which is quite jelpful. As for Xander, he keeps them grounded. He's not helpful practically, but he has his place

Spike feeding into Willow's insecurities...

Ouch poor Giles

The ruins of high school

The mayor's body is still there, just decomposing 😭😭

Spike be helpful for once 🙄

Spike founds out he can hurt other demons yay

SPIKE NOT IN THE HOLE

Riley to the rescue

How long is that string????

I forgot Riley doesn't know that they know

G.I. Joe outfit 😭

"You do look wicked conspicuous" 😭😭

I forgot about the balls poster

Woaw they're kissing

Spike you can do whatever you want you don't need them