#But when it comes to it your empathy is conditional and if you get the chance to mock somebody else you take it

[banannabethchase]

Some people have the most atrocious takes on the people in Houston in the aftermath of Beryl and they all have shit like "guardian" and "I love everyone" and "peace for all" in their bios.

It's like the Tumblr version of bigoted Karens on Instagram having bible verses in their bios.

[anasfamilys]

Hello,

🛑🚨🚨🚨

My name is Anas Al Burri. I am 17 years old, and I live in Gaza. My sister has jaundice because she gave birth to her child in an unhygienic area during the war. She has no medication, and her condition is worsening, almost life-threatening. She is too ill to produce milk for her son, and we can't get milk from anywhere else. I have no medication for my diabetes! I am missing insulin, and my blood sugar is critically high, often above 180 and sometimes even 400. I suffer from hyperglycemia attacks and can't get to a hospital because we are in the northern part of Gaza.

https://www.tiktok.com/@pali.liberation?_t=8pPrgadb4sr&_r=1. My campaign documentation number here is 25.

Three months ago, my 14-year-old brother Ahmad was searching for something to eat when he was sh*ot in the ch*est by sni*pers from a kilometer away. The bul*let went straight through his body. He was just a CHILD! We still can't believe it and keep thinking he will come back any moment. We didn't even have time to mourn him before the next family members were kill*ed.

The hardships my family and I face are beyond what words can describe. This is our last resort.

We are reaching out to you with a desperate plea. We need your help to survive. Your donation can provide us with the life-saving medications and food that we desperately need. Every act of kindness brings us closer to safety and restores a glimmer of hope in our hearts.

With your support, you can give us and many other families in Gaza a chance to survive and rebuild our shattered lives. Help us survive and leave Gaza so that the last of our family does not perish.

Thank you for your empathy and kindness.

With heartfelt gratitude,

Anas Al-Burri and Family

❤❤

[writers-potion]

Writing Mad Characters

Okay this is a bit awkward because I had this question copypasted into Google Docs I use to draft my answers, and I realized I've lost the question in my inbox (which is being flooded).

So...I'm so sorry for whoever asked this question. Sorry for the delay because I was struggling with life in general for the past month and definitely SORRY for losing your question (－‸ლ)

Q: I'm writing a story where a major character is slowly spiraling into madness where small details kinda hint into the downfall right before the bigger details appear and then it the floodgates open. Is there anything I should avoid? Anything that I should keep in mind? Anything that I should research?

Things to Avoid

“Mad” or “Insane” is too general. Writing a cliched ‘crazy’ character who randomly talks to imaginary people and lashes out at strangers, you’ll offend a whole bunch of people who've gone through/have mental illnesses. Read up on existing mental conditions (schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, post-traumatic disorder and borderline personality disorder, etc.) to see what your character might have. 

Words like “mad” “crazy” or “insane” aren’t enough when you’re describing their status. As mentioned, these words hardly mean much when it comes to providing a clear description.

Contradicting yourself. Throwing random unhinged symptoms here and there wouldn’t work. In fact, you must have a clear arc on which they’re traveling and ensure that your “hints” are all getting at something.

Making the character overly destructive or harmful to others (when nothing really justifies it)

Justifying damaging behavior with this “madness”. Mad or not, your character will still have motives and goals that drive them forward. 

Making them look incompetent just the fact that they have a mental condition that makes them appear “mad” to others shouldn’t prevent them from achieving success. In fact, they may be even more cool-hearted and logical when it comes to their obsessions/goals. 

Research Tips

Narrow down the mental conditions your character experiences. Even if it’s a fictional condition, try basing it on existing ones and building on top of them. 

Take some time to study characters and/or real clinical cases that resemble the kind of madness you’re going for. 

- Anxiety Disorders: excessive fear and dread (ex. phobias) - Mood Disorders: persistent swings in mood or persistent feelings that interfere with daily life (ex. Depression, bipolar) - Psychotic Disorders: disordered thinking (ex. schizophrenia) - Eating Disorders: extreme emotional attitudes toward food (ex. Bulimia, anorexia) - Impulse Disorders: unable to resist urges (ex. Kleptomania, pyromania, gambling) - Personality Disorders: extreme inflexible personality traits (ex. Anti-social disorder, OCPD) - Past Traumatic Stress: persistent, frightening memories leading to emotional numbness 

Does your character have empathy?  

A sociopathic kind of madness is different. 

General Writing Tips for Spiraling into Madness

Establish a Baseline 

A lot of factors (stress, family history, innate personality, trauma, etc.) can contribute to madness, but it is not going to happen in a week. Define the existing mental and physical conditions your character has, and start from there. 

If you’re aiming for suicidal tendencies at the end, you want to start with symptoms of depression (a condition that may lead to suicide) - growing apathetic, erratic sleeping patterns, irritability, etc. 

This is also the stage where you want to plant some triggers that’ll go off later.

Trigger Events

A perfectly sound character suddenly spiraling down the madness route due to a single accident or traumatizing event isn’t convincing. 

A madness “snap” denies the reader the experience of watching the character’s journey into madness and how they feel about it. 

Internal Conflict (antagonist in himself) 

You must remember that madness is incurable. If someone could “cure” themselves by eating healthy, exercising and taking a few pills, it wouldn’t be much of a madness, would it? This means that the worst antagonist is going to be the character themselves, or the part of them that’s been taken away. 

Show how they are frustrated with themselves, scared of themselves, angry at their “alternative self”. The experience of not knowing yourself is a whole journey of its own.

Physical Manifestations/Quirks

If your character has a routine, show how they break down. 

They might develop habits that they otherwise would never allow themselves to have, perhaps as an effort to “keep this madness out”

Deteriorating Relationships

Depict how the character’s madness impacts his closed/loved ones. In the earlier stages, those close to him might be faster to notice and accept the signs of madness, even if the character denies it him/herself.

The first signs of madness might show when the character is trying to deal with difficult relationships - like losing patience and being unable to pick up subtle social clues.

Choosing Obsessions Over Primal Urges 

For these characters, obsession can take over a person’s normal urge to eat, sleep or even live. This can lead to, more or less, suicide. 

Example: In Black Swan, Nina’s obsession with becoming the perfect ballerina drive her to insanity, to the point where she doesn't mind dying on stage for the show.

[zoropookie]

SWEET MELODY

☆ chapter ten — obliterate him. 🎂

It's not often they were in such close proximity to each other.

The car hummed softly while the two of them, Kuni and Xiao, sat inside while silence lingered. It was thick and awkward, punctuating only by the occasional clearing of the throat or a rustle of clothing as one of them shifted uncomfortably.

There were hardly any words spoken between them as it is, it was harder to think that either of them knew exactly what the other was thinking. Regardless, Xiao kept his eyes on the road, fingers tapping lightly on the wheel. The silence was comfortable, as they both didn't claim the energy they gave off, but it would have been unbearable for the others.

Kuni stared out the window, watching all scenery pass by in a slow pace. The bakery only a few miles away from them but it felt all the more interminable, stretched out by prolonged quietude. It was better than Lumine hounding him.

Finally, the silence was broken by a stiff and gravelly sigh from the bassist. "You're not this irritating on a regular day."

"Perceptive finally?" Kuni asked, pressed against his seat in defeat. "That's what happens when you deal with the usual existential dread. You know how it is."

"Still not grounds to act out. Makes it uncomfortable for everyone." Xiao lips twitched. "There's always a way to regulate your emotions better. Unless you have a reason for why you're being difficult."

His shoulders laxed, eyebrows furrowing at the flood of memories he was forced to revisit. "Like I ever gave a fuck how uncomfortable people are around me." He scoffed to himself. "It's not my job to coddle the people around me just to show that I have empathy. What do I have to prove to anyone?"

And there it was; half of a reason to his outlandish bursts of rage. He couldn't really tell whether he was genuine with how he feels or not, but the longer he listened to his reason, the more he realized how contradictory he was in his attitude. Like everything revolved around him, and the minute it doesn't, he'll come up with reasons why everybody else is the problem except for him on why it's annoying.

The other took short glances at him, voice low and steady. "You don't have to be kind," He paused. "You have to be content. It makes everyone around you as miserable as you are when you're not content, and it pushes them away. I'm guessing you see the similarities, too. Otherwise, you wouldn't have been so defensive."

Kuni took it in with a heavy heart. One that boiled with confusion and mirth, but also...in a way, he understood that the other was right. All his thoughts were just violent reactions to impulsively spew, to exude when he was filled with callousness to the point where it explodes and implodes at the same time. He wasn't the flower people wanted him to be, which stung, but it was irreparable to him.

He hummed in response with resignation, mulling over Xiao's words over and over again. But as always, in an attempt to get the last word in, he clenched at his jaw. "Don't put yourself in my shoes, you're not going to understand how I operate any time soon."

Xiao parked the car and turned to him after taking the laminated letter, still in perfect condition as he looped the mask over his ear. "If I put myself in your shoes, I wouldn't live at all." He said, nothing to give him on his expression that would insult him further. "Let's go."

The other scowled, opening the car door with a bit more force than necessary. The cool air was a stark difference from the blazing heat they were withstanding inside of the company and their negligence with the air conditioning. He stepped out, stuffing his hand into his pocket to put his mask on.

The shop was always charming looking, with the mouthwatering scent of freshly baked desserts every hour that sell out quick. The bell above the door jingled softly as they entered the store, and Kuni was able to fully absorb what your store even looked like at all. It was perfect, you were putting a lot of work into this building for years.

You had everything in mind, from the way you mapped out and drew every piece you wanted to decorate the bakery, to the flooring and the placement. It looked exactly like the layout you drew in school. Except with all of the sweet treats, and the sickly pastry scent to him, it was supposed to be your very own veterinarian office.

He glanced around bitterly, taking in the rows of delicacies displayed behind the glass. The golden crusts and colorful frostings momentarily stung at the wound that was already there.

Something wicked snapped inside of him seeing all of your employees smile as you spoke to them, hiding behind your mask of imminent anxiousness. He had to stifle it yet again, a surge of emotions overwhelming his head. His thoughts twisted and turned in fight, everything you once dreamed of became into a shitshow. The bitter taste of regret lingered in his mouth, which made him angrier.

With the moderately-sized line in question, Xiao motioned towards you to Kuni, him slowly following after. He stopped you in time to get you to turn around. "This is yours."

You slowly looked at the two of them, before looking down at the letter. Your heart dropped to your stomach as you gasped inwardly, feeling tears well up. "Is that you, Xiao? Where did you find this?"

"You dropped it."

You scrambled to take it out of his hands, your nose leaking from how hard you bursted into tears. "Thank you...thank you...I'm sorry you had to come all this way, it must have slipped my mind to ask Miss Ei..."

Kuni couldn't help but laugh patronizingly. "Oh yeah? It slipped your mind? You're a joke."

You froze, recognizing that voice from anywhere. Your tension grew heavy all of a sudden, heart dropping a second time like clockwork. Xiao shot him a warning look, brows knitting together in frustration. "Did I say something wrong?"

"This is all we came here for," Xiao responded sharply, eyes looking to obliterate him if he continued his act. "Unless you have something else to say."

"I have a lot to say, albeit, nothing nice for klutzy bitches who we have to pick up after." His jaw set in defiance as he sucked at his teeth. "I'm going to the bathroom."

Defeated as he left, Xiao's eyes looked back at you. "This will be the first and last time I'll show up here," He continued. "It causes a lot more trouble than it's worth."

You nodded, standing there as you reread the found letter again. Over and over again until you felt better. You took a deep breath you felt like you haven't gotten to in a long time, trying to steady yourself. "I'm sorry for being so much trouble. I really appreciate that you came all this way."

He nodded, his hardened expression softening as he looked at you. There was something he didn't know about, and even though he wasn't too interested in figuring it out, there was something off here. "I'm going now."

"Wait," You weakly stopped him as he was about to leave. "Can I send you guys off with some sweets?" You asked quietly, your voice trembling as you managed a smile. "To thank you. This letter really means a lot to me..."

"No." He waved you off, tone firm. "Tell him I'm waiting."

You watched him leave, another chime of the bell as an indicator. You felt yourself beam again, reading the letter a fifth time as you tried to retrace your brothers voice in the letter. You failed again, hoping one day you'd find it. Feeling somewhat of a bigger confidence than usual, you kept it with you, the lamination on the letter

As you were about to head back to the kitchen, you turned the corner only to be aggressively pulled into the nearest bathroom. Your arm was yanked behind you so hard that you yelped, twinging something in your shoulder.

"What the fuck is all this?" He hissed in a dangerous whisper, grip loosening as he flung your arm back to your body. "If you want to waste your life on this desperate attempt to belong, fine, but don't bring all of us into your shit too."

Your eyes shook, rubbing your shoulder as you kept the letter tucked under your thumb. "I don't really get the vet stuff you mentioned...I'm trying to find out what you meant."

"Another thing that pisses me off, you're such a faker, it's amazing! How long has that been a thing to get my attention?" His voice raised, getting closer to your face as he took the mask off. "Huh? Look me in the fucking eye and tell me you don't remember anything."

"I don't," You replied firmly, your resolve wavering. "I don't know how to prove it to you, it's not something I can recall right now...I'm sorry."

"Aw, you're sorry?" His voice dripped with a baby-ish tone this time. "You've been babied to shit, and now you think that you're untouchable. You're a fucking coward, not even worthy of my time. Running away from your problems and making it my problem... who's the first person my mom shits on whenever you make a choices that fucks over the both of us? Look at me."

Your eyes welled up. "I don't know what you're talking about..." You forced yourself to keep eye contact with him. "I just wanted to do something other than mope! I didn't want to stay at home all day..! I'm sorry." You dry heaved.

He let out a bitter laugh, stepping back once he ripped the letter out of your hands. "What even is this? You had it laminated and everything..." He read it in amazement. "This is what you been freaking the fuck out over, huh?"

"Please give it back." You took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. "It's really important..."

"I bet, you fucking hypocrite." His eyes were voice, flashing with anger and something else— something that looked almost like hurt. "You talk a lot about moving forward for someone who runs away from their pain. Who always wants an out to their suffering, who wants to take up space they're not fucking needed in."

You stepped back when he moved closer to you, your back against the wall as you reached your arm out towards the letter, wincing at your own actions. "I didn't mean to intrude on your life again...your mom invited me. I didn't know it was to get us to make up again. I'll stay out, I promise." You continued speaking, rambling on desperately to get him to hand the letter back to you.

He stared at you for a long moment, his face twisted in disgust as he watched you grovel for this mere letter in his hands. It was taking out more from you than you realized at the moment, but you were out of options. As you begged and pleaded in whispers, he threw the letter on the ground and grabbed your face.

His grip was firm on you, nails digging into your cheeks as he made you look directly into his eyes. "You think you're so special." He hissed, voice dripping with the most poisonous venom imaginable. "So important that everyone drops everything in a heartbeat for you. You think you can just waltz back into my home, pretend like nothing happened, and I won't fuck you up for what you did to me? I'm here now, so what's up?"

Your heart pounded in your chest, the intensity of what was happening was causing you to choke on your tears. "I'll leave you alone...I promise."

His eyes narrowed in amusement, finding a sliver of humor and shallow lust in your fear, before leaning forward and locking his lips with yours as a response.

A kiss so fierce and consuming, you trembled against him, hardly even reciprocating but feeling your heart flutter at his gesture. A memory you didn't want to remember resurfaced again, of you singing for his birthday and his bitterness longed with passion in the past.

Now? It was terrifying; it wasn't gentle or kind, but raw and intense. Filled with vexation, something deeper that even he couldn't identify. Your head spun while his hands moved from your cheeks to your hair, fingers tangling in the strands as he gripped at your hair. He took a lock and pushed your head closer.

He tasted the same as he did so long ago. And it hurt you.

As sudden as it began, and while you were relaxing, he pulled away. His eyes dark and stormy as he stared into your eyes, continuously flicking from the letter and back to him. He felt rough and unsteady, and something in him told him that he overstayed his welcome enough. "No," He paused, muttering low and cocky. "It's not the same."

With that he left, the door swinging behind him shut and you immediately scrambling for the letter that was on the floor, feeling your breath be pried away from you again as you lost it. You leaned against the sink, feeling your tears dry on your face as you cried harder.

"Kazuha..." You cried out with red eyes, your voice drawling.

previous ☆ masterlist ☆ next

THERE ARE not many things that can sway your interest ever since the "incident", but in spite of that, you pushed forward. you are now the owner of the biggest bakery chain in your city, consistently seeing couples and catering to them as such. you've been a big host at weddings, events for celebrities, and even a big support for your friends and family. you've even earned yourself a niche following as well by how sweet you are to everybody around you. but, even with your kindness, you don't have a particular spark that keeps you going anymore these days. that is until one of your employees starts suggesting you write love letters to customers who request your services. at first you thought it was a horrible idea that could easily turn into trouble, but that was until you were tasked with writing one to your own (very very famous) ex-boyfriend.

taglist ☆ — @seternic @chemiru @coquettemaiden @1kio0o @emiixuu

@agaygothicmushroom @yomishen @jingyuan-wife-real @toruscorpse @whoooismkeee

@sketcheeee @st4r4ngel @xionri @scaradooche @lightyagamifan

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@mtndewbajablasted @vernith @lovekeychains @danhenglovebot @elizshade

@balladeersflower @kazumiku @bananasquash @neversore @yevurin

@franaby @vicslz @kamiboo @thegalaxyisunfolding @morgyyyyyyy

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@soonyoungblr @state-of-grac3

[jjkamochoso]

In Sickness and Sadism

Not fluff, not angst, but a secret third thing... (it's Feitan from HxH, what can I say)

Feitan Portor x gn!reader with chronic illness

You can't afford your medicine. Feitan won't accept that!

Warnings: cussing, breaking of human bones, mentions of other violence (not toward reader)

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

You were incredulous. You had been frequenting the same pharmacy in your home town since you could remember and the price for medicine had always been consistent. That's what you liked about shopping there--the owner didn't price gouge like they did in every other store. Now, you didn't know what to do. You needed to buy the damn medicine or else you would be miserable, or probably even dead. It already wasn't easy having to deal with a chronic illness and now you had to face the fact that you definitely didn't have enough money to buy something you needed to live.

"That's just how much it is now, don't cry to me about it," sneered the cashier and you felt your anger bubble up at his lack of empathy. Your life was terribly unfair and you wanted to scream, cry, and punch the smirk off the cashier in that order.

"Please, can I talk to Mr. Greck, the owner, about this? I've been coming here for years, maybe he can get me a discount," you pleaded, but the cashier just laughed at you.

"The owner has a job from which he needs to make money. Not that you would know what it's like to have money in the first place. So no, you can't waste his time begging like the poor person you are. Now get out or I'll throw you out."

You glared at him, hoping he was bluffing, but he seemed the type to follow through with hurting someone like you and you knew your body couldn't take the exhaustion, especially if you were going to be off your medicine for a while. You needed to make sure you were in good condition to work every day of the week, plus overtime, to make enough to buy your month's supply. Feeling defeated and upset, you left the building, tears falling freely.

Feitan prided himself on his distinct lack of empathy. He relished in the fact that the pain of others makes him feel warm inside. There was no better symphony of sounds than people crying and screaming for their pain to stop.

So why the fuck was he finding himself so outraged at some random person's medical predicament?

The raven haired man had stopped in to a local pharmacy to pick up (ahem... steal) some supplies for the Troupe in case anyone managed to get hurt on the latest mission. He wasn't paying attention to his surroundings for the first few minutes of his shopping spree, completely uncaring to someone else's woes of the fragility of the human body. All of a sudden, after stuffing the last roll of gauze in his sleeve, his ears perked up to listen in to the conversation happening at the front register.

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

His eyebrows furrowed. Not that he cared, because he wasn't paying for any of his things anyway, but he did notice that the price tags here for items displayed significantly lower numbers than previous pharmacies he had visited in other areas around. You had affirmed his findings in your conversation with the cashier and Feitan felt his blood boiling at the brash rudeness coming from the cashier's mouth. Who did that scum think he was, speaking like that to someone for no reason? Feitan certainly wasn't the nicest guy around but even he had the decency to not be a total jerk to random strangers, let alone people in distress about their medical and financial woes. He didn't know why he was giving this ordeal the time of day. Maybe it was because of his upbringing? He saw this type of thing daily in Meteor City. Hell, he lived it himself. There was nothing scarier than seeing a totally healthy person decay rapidly and shrivel into nothingness, all because they were born in unfortunate circumstances. He scoffed when he saw you leaving in tears. Why didn't you just use your brain and brawn and steal it? Were you too weak? He saw your fists clenching earlier and figured you were strong enough to take down that slime ball. If you did end up getting your ass kicked, at least you didn't lie down like a dog and take it, like you were doing now. His eyes followed your frame until you left the building and he watched until your silhouette was no longer visible outside. He didn't know why he was doing this. He wasn't supposed to make a big scene whenever he was out and about, but the events were already set into motion before he could stop himself.

"5 month supply of whatever that person needed." Feitan ordered, pointing to the boxes behind the cashier's head.

The cashier just laughed at him. "You too, huh? What are you, their boyfriend or somethin'? Maybe their kid? Scrawny little thing."

Oh, he'll wish he never had a tongue to speak those words.

Feitan kept his cool, procuring a velvet bag from his person and set it on the counter with a clank emitting from the contents of inside. "I have money."

The cashier's mouth opened in a greedy smile. He quickly retrieved the 5 month supply Feitan requested and put it in a bag.

"That'll be 100,000 Jenny."

Feitan smirked under his cowl. He reached into the bag, seemingly to pull out money, but instead of coins, the cashier's outstretched hand was met with a mini hammer. The sickening crunch of bones could be heard as the man howled in pain.

"Oh? Big man can't handle small hammer?" Feitan taunted, his eyes crinkled in delight at the man's suffering. The cashier tried to reach for a gun he had stashed behind the counter but Feitan was much too fast, grabbing his wrist and turning his arm the wrong way so that, too, was broken. The cashier couldn't get a word out, instead crying out with tears running down his face.

"Don't cry to me about it." Feitan mocked the worker by using his own words against him. The shorter man hummed a bit, thinking of what to do next. He needed to finish up quickly or else he'd lose track of you and end up having done this all for nothing.

Well, this wasn't all for nothing either way. He needs to make sure he practices his methods often so he doesn't lose his edge.

Feitan grabbed the bag containing the medicine and cleaned up his own bag of tools while the cashier was lying on the floor, writhing in pain and ready to pass out. He gave him a strong kick before turning toward the door.

"Good luck getting all that fixed at hospital. If you can afford it."

You were walking down the street, dejected and unsure of what to do when you felt a nauseating presence appear behind you. You turned around to face a short man with a skull face covering offering you a bag. Naturally, you were hesitant to take it, but he nudged it to you again.

"Medicine. For you."

Your eyes widened in surprise. Did you hear the soft spoken man correctly? You tore open the bag and saw multitudes of your medicine within.

"5 months. Go get better job or learn to steal."

You went to thank him but he was already gone, disappearing like a ghost. You were thoroughly confused but at the same time, extremely grateful. You stood on the street corner in a daze until the sound of screaming could be heard somewhere close to you.

"Someone please help! This cashier's been seriously injured!"

You whipped around to see a woman running out from... the pharmacy? What exactly had that man done to get you what you needed? You were ready to run away from the scene so you weren't questioned as a suspect when you caught a glimpse of your savior once more, watching you like a hawk from the rooftop of the building next to you. He put his finger to where his lips resided under his mask, a signal to stay quiet about what happened, as he let out a short maniacal laugh and disappeared from your sight.

Feitan finally realized why he decided to help you that one day. There were many people in this world he'd gladly see rot to death and then rot even further after that.

But not you.

No, you were much too attractive to be a corpse so soon.

[qqueenofhades]

The thing that confuses me about the "don't vote" left (not the "I don't want to vote", I'm talking explicitly the "don't vote" left. I don't agree with the "I don't want to vote" left either but I can understand their logic) is they lose me at the final step of the logic. I've tried to connect the logic here, even if I don't agree with a political position I do try to understand where people are coming from (empathy for someones situation is not the same as cosigning it), but I just can't connect the dots here in a way that isn't deeply cruel. Does United States politics prioritize the lives of those in the US (and often white) over those in the Global South? Yes, it's a fucking atrocity. We should continue to make noise about it, cus Biden has used less drones and that shows progress, even if it's not enough. The part where I lose the plot is where the conclusion to this injustice is to let even more people die? Cus that's kinda how I see the idea of not voting: I can pick between shit and more shit, and at the end of the day, I'm picking whoever allows the most people to make it to the next day. Given Trumps stance on everything but specifically climate change, I feel like Biden is pretty significant harm reduction.

I don't think both things can't be true: that every life lost is a travesty we should not forget AND the more people we can save is worth fighting for.

The thing is, I have seen nothing among the "don't vote" far left (and I am talking here specifically about the people who both loudly announce their intention not to vote and try to convince others to do the same) to convince me that they actually care about harm reduction or stopping genocide. They only care about what makes them look the most Correct and/or superior to the Democrats. They yelled bloody murder about Obama using drones, they went dead quiet about Trump using them even more (even when he nearly started WWIII by assassinating the Iranian general Soleimani with one), and then said nothing at all when Biden reduced the drone program to almost nothing and withdrew the US from a failed war in Afghanistan it had long ago lost. Now they will yell all day about Israel/Hamas (something that Biden did not start and has had no direct military role in responding to) but they don't care about Russian genocide of Ukraine and Syria, Chinese threats to invade Taiwan, etc, because those governments are "anti-western/anti-American" and therefore should be defended. Their opposition to human suffering is extremely conditional and rests on whether they can look good out of it, and they never interrogate the hypocrisies of their own ideology.

Likewise: every country in the world prizes its own citizens above those of other countries. It's just a basic fact. Yes, the US has a grim history of intervening in other countries and causing untold civilian damage (especially during the Cold War and then in post-9/11 War on Terrorism). Yes, that legacy is complex and needs to be acknowledged. But literally none of that will be fixed, not to mention all the vulnerable people in America itself who will be punished, by Trump getting into power again. Biden is not just a grudging "lesser evil," but has done a lot of truly good and helpful things, regardless of the Online Leftists' constant lies, misinformation, and misrepresentation. If you spend all your time announcing what a champion you are for non-American marginalised people and/or those undergoing terrible suffering, and then deliberately and knowingly adhere to a course of action that will increase that suffering tenfold not only for those people but your own neighbors, friends, and family, then no, I don't believe you are a brave champion of social justice. You just want to know what categories of people you can gleefully and righteously punish and make to suffer for not believing the same things as you, that makes you just as dangerous as the right-wing fascists, and I can and will call out your ass accordingly.

[badsweetangel]

imagine an alternative universe where instead of them being the killers, the killers are us

(Creepypasta!Killer!Reader x Normal!Helen otis, Normal! x-virus and Normal!Toby)

Crazy (Creepypasta!Killer!Reader x Normal!Helen otis, Normal! Toby and Normal! x-virus)

Warnings: Reader has yandere vibes. Toxic relationships, with Cody the story is better because he is crazy lol

Normal! Helen Otis

Honestly, he was constantly terrified. He couldn't say no and reject you. He was completely trapped with you, he knew that the only destiny that would take him away from you was death and he was sure that if that happened you would manage to continue leaving the chaos. He preferred to be by your side.

One day he simply returned from his classes, trying to turn a deaf ear to the constant mockery of his classmates. And at nightfall things got worse and to this day he cursed the day he decided to arrive later at his house, because that's when he started it all. The same day you decided on his death and then you changed your mind unpredictably determining that he would be with you until you got bored of him. He walked feeling a presence behind him, his hands began to sweat and he understood that in his life everything could always get worse.

There you were, having already forgotten any hint of empathy you ever had, feeling miserable and mentally carrying murders that you could no longer count. Life no longer had any meaning for you and you were angry. Anger at your own life and at your own conditions that made you now stand behind a young boy who was soon going to die. Maybe that gave some kind of feeling of power. Power you needed to feel like your life wasn't just a loss of control. No, you had clearly chosen this. Without him being able to react, you hit him hard on the head, leaving him dazed. There you saw it, at that very moment you decided to leave it alive for a while.

He being conscious said all the things a victim would say to his attacker, that you would regret this and that he would call the police. Until he saw your appearance, in his head he knew that he was lost. Weren't you just an internet story made up by someone else? He was really lost. No one would ever believe him.

He knew he had to listen to you when you killed his friend Tom because you were jealous. And then you just continued, threatening to do much worse things if he didn't give in. Every day you became worse, you were no longer the person who sat on the side of the room and talked about how life had no meaning, you were completely crazy and your head no longer understood reasons.

Yes, he was cursing the day when he decided to arrive later at his house. However, he was slowly losing his sanity with you, enjoying your outbursts of anger and everything you did for him.

Normal! Toby

His family life was completely unstable and he himself was already going crazy. However, he was alone. Until one day you came to kill him, to end his suffering. He didn't want to do anything against it, since he already felt guilty enough to consider himself a problem.

Furthermore, he was insensitive to pain so your sadism did not cause him fear. You had entered his house, he who had just come out of a severe crisis simply stared at you, completely bored with his own life. Not that you cared, really. You only came here to do one thing and you both knew what it was. And you, being completely honest, left him alive because he didn't seem to suffer from your attacks. You were surprised, completely. You had clearly ignored his emotional distress, you simply asked him why he didn't seem to react, he replied. Without doing anything else.

Until they hear a voice. A man's voice. He was scared, he could see that fear.

“I hope he does feel some shit” You mocked him, walking out of his room.

Toby started, but something stopped him. His body simply did not respond, deep down he wanted that to happen. And he knew it. So he let you do it. That day you had brutally ended the life of his father. And he stayed there, listening to his screams. Emotionally numb, not knowing how to feel.

When you returned to his room you only thought about what to do with him.

“You're so fucking boring” You simply said.

He was used to that kind of comment so he just understood it. From that day on he followed you. He felt hate and love towards you. But he was addictive, he felt like you had somehow saved him from his misery. If you ever did something unforgivable, he just turned a deaf ear.

Normal! x-virus

He was not well, since they adopted him he learned things that give him a great advantage. From the moment you saw him you knew that he was different, different from other people. He captivated you instantly, you couldn't even think about blood at that moment. But you knew that the only way to get something on your terms was to simply go for it, enduring the tears and cries for help. So you decide to save that drama and simply leave the boy behind. Although his figure did not disappear from your mind, it was like an obsession, someone you couldn't let go. So you hid and began to observe the house where he lived, hoping that he would come out.

One day, you couldn't continue hiding your little hobby, because he had discovered you. When he started to approach you simply appeared, you waited for him. You weren't afraid of anything anymore.

“If you do anything to me it will go very badly for you” you threatened.

He just asked who you were.

His mind was completely unhinged, despite not being able to bring out those hidden impulses, so something about your appearance made him just keep you close.

Although he knew that you had complete control of the situation.

[g0thnico]

Things that if I were Rick Riordan I would make more dramatic:

Percy and Gabe's relationship. I understand that it's a children's series so it's normal not to be explored as much, but if PJO was written by me, I would be turning this into one of the main points of Percy's traumas

Percy's mortal life. The only times this is introduced in PJO is to show something divine next, usually monsters or new problems. I would have shown more of what Percy was like at school and his relationship with mortals (or lack thereof)

Percy's powers. Okay, Percy is super powerful and doesn't have any conditions for this?? Nico has nothing more fair. For me, Percy's healing should 2hurt, a burning sensation for cuts and the feeling of bones going back into place when he needs to fix them. In addition, his ability to control water will cause hunger that varies according to how much he used his powers

Ares. Okay Ares is the god of war, but also the protector of women, don't you think he would have at least conflicted feelings about Percy because he was abused along with his mother? I think he would have at least a little empathy for him because of Sally

Percy's romantic life. Okay Rick, we already understand that you definitely don't know how to write romance novels, so leave it to me. Your development of Percabeth was crap and Perachel manages to make it worse, don't even talk to me about Percalypso, he accidentally ended up making Percy's romantic development with two of Hades' sons better than the canon couples. Yes, I'm talking about Bianca di Angelo because it seems like no one noticed the way he talked about Bianca (she was different from the other girls and easy to talk to), Nico (he felt a great sense of protection towards him and couldn't stop thinking about the boy who ran away) and HADES (he was amazed by Hades' dark form and would like to sleep at his feet????)

Grover and Percy soul connection. The fact that Grover and Percy are bonded and feel each other's feelings and the fact that if one dies, the other dies with them, has only been explored 2 or 3 times and that is absurd!!!! I would do at least 5 dramatic scenes where Percy feels an indescribable sadness and can't show anything but Grover cries and breaks down in helplessness just by feeling his friend's emotions. Maybe another one where Grover almost dies and Percy spits blood and faints and everyone has to find a way to save both of them or simply undo the bond before one dies, or even take care of one through the other's body (if that's possible) ok I have a lot of ideas

finally, the older brother complex coming from Sally (feeling like the experiment that went wrong and watching what went right grow). Long title, I know, but it's necessary and self-explanatory. Sally had Percy and went through a lot of hardships because he was a demigod and she was practically a single mother (having Gabe as a husband is the same as nothing) so Percy grew up with a lot of trauma and somewhat neglected by his parents and society (don't be fooled, Sally is an excellent mother, but they were a poor family and she had to work, leaving the boy to fend for himself and become somewhat independent too soon). He did everything possible to avoid causing trouble and in Sally's eyes, he really didn't! She sees all the problems they went through as the fault of the gods or monsters, not her son (the victim). So Sally gets rid of Gabe, moves out, marries a good man who understands her and accepts her "we have to deal with half-blood stuff" lifestyle, and has a normal, mortal daughter who has a perfect family. Percy never had that, and when he does, he feels like he's second best in this butter-business family. So he wants his sister to have the best life possible but realizes it's too late for him to live that

and the younger brother complex from Poseidon (feels like he must exceed his expectations, become the hero everyone expects, become as good as all the other sons of Poseidon). Percy is a demigod, accidentally a son of Poseidon and that shouldn't be a big deal. But suddenly there is a prophecy and he is the chosen one, so he is Poseidon's favorite son, strongest demigod, hero of Olympus and he needs to be strong, more than ever Percy needs to be not only good, but the best. Never in his life was he expected to do anything, not even get past the 6th grade so dad God Almighty puts all this weight on his back and he almost dies more times than he can count

[fantasy-frog]

To anybody who might see this, July in the states is disability pride month. As someone who’s past decade plus has been a journey towards understanding, accepting, and advocating for my psychological and physical disabilities and my whole life, aiding disabled family members, I want make it known that: the way many of us feel you can help us the most, is not by “pretending” we’re abled, like we’re just like everyone else, because we’re *not*

When disabilities are ignored, or treated as just “uniquely abled”, it falls on the disabled to maintain abled people’s comfort; to make our disabilities small, to not advocate for equity and the bettering of our lives in a supposedly equal society.

Equality is not equity.

Differences must be acknowledged, understood, and worked around *by abled people* for any true progress to be made.

Most people think this is government related. I know abled people as individuals can’t change that there’s little to no wheel chair access in their bustling city, that the sidewalks are cracked and filled with lips. An abled person can’t make public schools treat autistic kids with humanity, or children with memory-relates disabilities able to always have notes for their exams. They can’t make the employers stop firing us, or the government give us our right to marriage when living under SSI.

What I’m asking for is Empathy. True empathy. The kind that informs your beliefs, and actions. Talk to disabled people. Get to know them. I promise you, you have a disabled person in your family or social circle. Really be inquisitive about their experiences, struggles, and frustrations.

Acknowledge your privilege. Your ease of access to the world. Really sit in it. Absorb it. Your empathy will only grow. And when enough abled people do even just this, the world for us becomes less hostile. It becomes more livable. We become no longer burdens, but cherished by our communities, our families and friends. And trust me, even though the world is not built for me, and I have to consistently jump through 10,000 hoops to achieve even the smallest of victories for an abled person, and my body hurts and breaks down, so I get in a chair on wheels, or get out my cane, or put on my noise cancelling headphones, and just come across obstacle after obstacle -

The majority of the pain comes from the stares. The glances. The questioning. The points when you see the patience leave the eyes of the one who you thought loved you unconditionally, and you remember your place in our collective culture. And fuck man. You recall how workable all the bureaucracy and hurdles felt, how manageable it was to push forward (it’s what you always do) … before you were reminded of where you sit on the totem poll, and how conditional worth is in our society.

Disabled people are worthy. We are valuable. But we need you to believe it, or nothing will ever change.

[monsterfuckerconfessions]

Hello, robot and machine enjoyers out there. I'm a big tech guy and a huge sucker for computer things, but some of the things are so incredibly hot for me and I'd like to share it with you. I hope that I'm not alone in this and someone else can understand what I mean.

1) Radio robots. If you ever tried to touch a radio antenna, you know that the signal will get stronger. It's because your body becomes a part of the antenna. Imagine fucking a robot with a radio signal, and when you touch its antenna, you can hear it more clearly, its feeling go through your whole body and interfere with it. Having the one whole signal with it. My god it's so hot.

2) Room-sized supercomputers. They are so complex, can count routs for space rockets and meteors, they have an incredible power. But at the same time they are so vulnerable. You can always see their inner parts, incredible amounts of wires and controls. Only a few people can be trusted to work with it. It's perfectly tweaked, no mistakes, the true perfection, but still so sensitive and big. You have to be so gentle and look for the perfect conditions for it to work. I want a supercomputer to trust me, I want it to try understanding human emotions and empathy.

3) Old tech in general. I'm fascinated by old computers in the 90s and 00s. Big computers with convex screens, old phones with full keyboards and weird shapes, very specific tech that nowadays no one uses. But I need them. I want it to work to its fullest, I want it to feel needed. They can do so much, a lot of lab equipment still runs on old computers. They're individuals, they have its own personality.

4) Transparent case. Do you remember old tech with colorful transparent designs? It was peak. I want it back on new tech and robots so bad. I want to see its innards, I want to know what it actually is. Seeing the work and processing in general, seeing something inserted like a usb cord or a memory card and how all the contacts are interacting with each other. Even more old analog stuff, with gears and cogs, seeing its perfect movement through the casing. Or a whole visible car engine?? Come on!!

.

[elysiansparadise]

I'm so exicited for everything you're doing, I love your blog! Any tips for my sun squaring his saturn?

Thank you love, that means a lot! 💞

How to deal with Sun-Saturn square in synastry?

This square is usually attributed to the feeling of not being able to express oneself with complete freedom in the relationship, feeling scared to open up either due to the fear of being judged or criticized [either due to internal or external situations in the relationship]. May feel this need not to disappoint the other and to constantly set high standards either to themselves or both.

As for practical approaches, I can mention the following:

🤍More acceptance and less criticism: This point applies both to how you treat the other and yourselves. It is important to keep in mind that you need to be yourself to be in a relationship, especially one in the long run. A relationship in which you constantly feel like you have to hide or limit yourself can become tiring for you, so if you have the fear of being judged or criticised, you need to communicate this with your partner. If this fear or insecurity comes from past experiences, share them.

🤍Show your support and encourage each other: Opening up to other people can be a difficult task for many, especially if they have had bad experiences in the past. As a couple, show the commitment and willingness you feel to be understanding and accepting with each other. Be patient, reassure the other that they can express themselves without fear of being judged, and make it clear that you can be vulnerable with the other. Verbal, physical reassurance or even through small actions such as putting aside the phone to pay attention when the other person is talking, asking questions to better understand can help improve trust. Don't rush each other and let things flow naturally.

🤍Do activities that the other likes: When you do this, you can see the other person in their element and appreciate how they act. In addition, you spend quality time together, which makes you get closer to the other emotionally. We express different sides of ourselves when we do something we are passionate about and we tend to be more uninhibited, so it can help a lot in dealing with this square. By showing interest in and in each other's interests, you can create feelings of gratefulness, appreciation, and affection.

Some aspects in astrology that can help with this are the following:

🩶Sun, Moon, Rising, Venus or a stellium falling in the other’s 5th house: When there is any of these, both can feel very drawn to the other, their individuality and simply the person they are. They can feel happy, delighted and intrigued by each other despite these differences that may exist. They may want to encourage the other person to be more genuine and confident, showing them that they don't have to be ashamed of the sides of their personality that cause them insecurity.

🩶Sun, Moon, Rising, Venus or a stellium falling in the other's 11th house: Similar to the previous point, they captivate each other, only being in this house both can be very different from the other. It will be precisely these differences that make them feel very attracted to the other person. They both encourage each other to be authentic and they freely teach each other what it is to be loved without conditions or expectations.

🩶Jupiter aspecting the Moon makes you both want to learn from each other on a deep level, ensuring you build a supportive and safe environment. Acceptance, affection, support and a lot of affection, they do not hesitate to reassure each other and they care a lot about intimacy as a couple to continue growing and having a positive and pleasant relationship for both. They are patient and understanding with each other which makes them feel that it is safe to open up.

🩶Neptune-Jupiter harmonious aspects make both natives awaken empathy, warmth and compassion in the other, making them feel that it is easier to be honest and emotional with the other. These aspects give a deep sense of strong and caring spiritual connection, which gives them comfort and even a sense of joy. There is that desire to know each other more on a deep level, from what makes them who they are to all the experiences that have impacted their lives, whether positive or negative. They will not make judgments or point fingers at the other, but rather they will prefer to put themselves in perspective to be able to understand better. Support, ability to connect positively with others and good wishes towards the other.

🩶When Venus is making aspects with Saturn, mutual attraction and the desire to care for each other are strengthened, making it easier to handle any type of challenges. Love and affection are present, and that makes both parties to solve problems with greater empathy and warmth. They both want to build a strong relationship which leads them to do everything necessary to make that possible, they strive to make the other feel loved and valued.

🩶North Node falling in the other's 1st, 5th or 11th house makes them a great support throughout the relationship for the other, especially in accepting themselves and motivating them to be more authentic and genuine. They can encourage others by appreciating them and helping them see the good sides of their personality. They teach the other to be themselves without fearing other people's opinions or criticism.

🩶Moon aspecting Sun or Rising makes you feel the trust of opening up to each other. They feel it is safe to talk about their emotions, express themselves and be vulnerable. These aspects speak to us of support, sympathy and a genuine desire to care for others, making them feel loved and taken into account, seen and heard. They are naturally delicate with each other and have the patience not to rush the other to open up. Receptive, supportive and very attentive.

🩶The harmonic aspects of either the Sun-Pluto or Moon-Pluto can be of great help in dealing with this square, because both can help each other break negative behaviour patterns and help the other when going through changes or while working. in themselves. They both give each other the strength and security to work on everything they need, help each other and guide each other towards a path of transformation and healing.

🩶Mercury aspecting Moon, Saturn or Pluto can help you have important, heavy or deep conversations more fluidly and easily. They awaken each other's trust and know that they can rely on the other, tell them about their most personal experiences, insecurities, issues or simply talk about their emotions. Sharing important things, looking for solutions and offering solutions is something that comes naturally to this couple.

🩶A trine, sextile or quintile/biquintile between Neptune-Venus not only make this relationship overflowing with love and romance, but there is also a supportive and adaptable quality to both. The other's flaws are not seen as something unattractive, nor do they place unattainable and demanding expectations on the other, rather they are able to love each other completely and show appreciation for each side of their partner.

[anasfamilys]

Hello,

My name is Anas Al Burri. I am 17 years old, and I live in G*za. My sister has jaundice because she gave birth to her child in an unhygienic area during the war. She has no medication, and her condition is worsening, almost life-threatening. She is too ill to produce milk for her son, and we can't get milk from anywhere else. I have no medication for my diabetes! I am missing insulin, and my blood sugar is critically high, often above 180 and sometimes even 400. I suffer from hyperglycemia attacks and can't get to a hospital because we are in the northern part of G*za.

Three months ago, my 14-year-old brother Ahmad was searching for something to eat when he was sh*ot in the ch*est by sni*pers from a kilometer away. The bul*let went straight through his body. He was just a CHILD! We still can't believe it and keep thinking he will come back any moment. We didn't even have time to mourn him before the next family members were kill*ed.

The hardships my family and I face are beyond what words can describe. This is our last resort.

We are reaching out to you with a desperate plea. We need your help to survive. Your donation can provide us with the life-saving medications and food that we desperately need. Every act of kindness brings us closer to safety and restores a glimmer of hope in our hearts.

With your support, you can give us and many other families in Gaza a chance to survive and rebuild our shattered lives. Help us survive and leave G*za so that the last of our family does not perish.

https://gofund.me/ecf94b00

Thank you for your empathy and kindness.

With heartfelt gratitude,

Anas Al-Burri and Family

❤❤

[tennessoui]

vos has entered the hanahaki au group chat <3

“There is one more thing, Obi-Wan,” Healer Che says as he is smoothing down his robes, holo scans of his lungs clutched in one hand.

“Force,” he snaps, “what else is there?” 

I’m dying, it’s unavoidable this time, it’s because of my own foolishness, it’s because of my uncontrolled heart, it’s because of my own weakness. I’m dying and there is nothing to be done except allow it to happen and now you tell me there’s more?

The smile she gives him is one part wry, two parts sad. A sliver of his pride rankles at the perceived pity, but he should probably get used to it. Eventually, he will be incapable of hiding his condition, and everyone will look at him the way Che is now.

“It is rare that we must give a terminal diagnosis,” Che says. “When we do, it is our practice to contact the patient’s emergency contact, pull them back from their mission or their leave should they be outside the Temple, so that the patient does not have to come to grips with the news by themselves. But given the nature of this disease, I want to have your explicit consent before moving forward. Do you agree to allow me to reach out to your emergency contact?”

Obi-Wan looks at her and then scrubs a hand over his face, letting his shoulders drop. “Force,” he says, drawing out the word like a curse. There isn’t really much in the way of a choice, though he appreciates Che for taking the time to frame it as one.

After all, his emergency medical contact will find out soon anyway. Best to give him permission to abandon his mission before he does so of his own volition and looks to pin the blame on Obi-Wan’s shoulders.

“Fine,” he says. “Fine, you may contact him. Tell him I’ll be in the Room of Some 30 Odd Fountains, meditating. He’ll know what I mean.”

And it’s truly a mark of how dire the situation is that Healer Che does not point out that she is not his messenger nor his secretary. Instead she inclines her head, and shows him out of her office, smile falling gracefully into an unreadable expression, tinged with sorrow. 

Not without empathy, but without pretense.

—------------

“Do you think Skywalker knows I’m still listed as your emergency medical contact?” Vos asks, dropping into the empty seat across from Obi-Wan and immediately leaning forward to steal his drink. “Because if he doesn’t, I think I’m best suited to break the news myself.”

“I do not wish to speak about Anakin Skywalker,” Obi-Wan says, stealing his drink back from Vos’ wandering hands and downing it in one go.

[honey-crypt]

can you do some headcanon drabbles thingies with a farmer that has BPD? Bachelors please

a/n: yippee i get to write about bpd!!! fun fact but i was diagnosed with it for about two years (it ended up being a misdiagnosis) and i did a ted talk (like a legit one lol) about it and the criminalization/demonization of personality and other "undesirable" disorders :3 thx for this request and enjoy!

warning: discussion of bpd splitting, mental health crisis, and self-harm

★ sdv bachelors with bpd!farmer ★

alex

★ seeing you split for the first time is the catalyst for him to address his own issues, such as dealing with his father's abuse; to an extent, he can see himself in you, longing for approval and love from others, only to fall apart when others don't provide that

★ a very good listener, he opens his ears and mind to you to talk about what's on your mind and you do the same for him; it's very helpful and therapeutic for the both of you

★ does his best to keep you away from george, he worries that his grandfather's behavior would trigger an episode in you but he couldn't keep you away from him forever; it does cause an episode but with evelyn's help, alex manages to get george on his best behavior around you

elliott

★ often writes you letters of reassurance and love for you to read whenever you're having an episode, it's his way of supporting you through your hard times

★ he attends workshops to learn methods to assist you with bpd episodes and symptoms after harvey recommended it to him when he confided in him about his concern for your wellbeing

★ adds a small piece of candy, such as a starburst or skittle, in your pill box so you have a little reward/pick-me-up when you take your medication

harvey

★ out of all the bachelors, he's the best equipped to support you during your episodes (he did a psych rotation during his residency) but he tries his best not to go doctor mode on you

★ covers your farmhouse with sticky notes that feature medication reminders, words of affirmation, and so on; you save each and every one of them in a little scrapbook that you look back on for reassurance

★ harvey makes you feel safe, you're truly able to trust him and confide in him; you both make it work and even though others are critical of your relationship, either of you really give a damn because you love one another

sam

★ he's familiar with mental health conditions because of his father's ptsd and in the beginning of your romantic relationship, he kinda isolates himself from you when you're splitting because he genuinely doesn't know how to help

★ but thankfully, he learns how to support you with harvey's education on bpd, such as grounding you with music or encouraging you to socialize with others

★ he enjoys writing and playing you songs as a means of grounding, you're his inspiration and he wants to brighten your world with the power of music

sebastian

★ he goes into research mode after you inform him that you have bpd, he knows that personality disorders are heavily stigmatized and he doesn't want you to feel like he thinks you're a bad person for having bpd

★ does dbt (dialectical behavioral therapy) homework with you when you come home from group (group therapy); it helps him just as much as it helps you, he learns a lot of coping techniques that he utilizes when he has to deal with hardships or shitty people like demetrius

★ gets you an enamel pin for every month you remain clear from self-harm, you have an ita bag that you secure every pin on and it's one of your most treasured possessions

shane

★ a match made in hell... JK JK you two have the potential to bring out the best or worst in one another, depending on your relationship and whether or not you both are in therapy

★ if you're friends, you're able to support one another through bpd or depressive episodes, you both are different sides of a very similar coin and your empathy for one another transcends the boundaries of your typical friendship

★ but if you're dating or married?? i'm sorry but it's not gonna work out well unless both of you are consistent with your meds and therapy; you often get paranoid about your relationship with shane and it only intensifies during his 14 heart event where you and marnie think he relapsed with his drinking, causing you to split... luckily, it works out in the end but you still struggle with coping and trusting shane

[ohwaitimthewriter]

The Memory Keeper

Chapter 6: Cruise

Pairing: Noa x human!reader

Warnings: None!

Summarize: A woman, allowed to live as long as the virus keeps running through her body, living on autopilot for 260 years, is going to see her life takes a new turn, finding hope in something that might come to put an end to her wandering.

Words: 3k+

A/N: Hi there! After all this time, I've decided to post the first part of this chapter. So it's not complete in what I wanted to tell entirely about this chapter. However, I find myself with a rather significant lack of inspiration and motivation, which has been going on for over a month now. I hope that working in this way will enable me to start the rest of this chapter under better conditions.

In the meantime, I hope you'll like this first part!

Enjoy your reading 😊

The Memory Keeper Masterlist / Planet of the apes Masterlist

Gifs credit (1) & (2)

Your brain was about to collapse. Its cogs were running at full speed in an engine flooded by years of letting yourself sink. Reaching the bottom of the ocean and letting yourself be carried along by the sea currents, getting used to seeing nothing but the crushing blackness of the abyss. Getting the engine running again made the rusty nuts creak, and no matter how many times you jabbed the storm-shaken screws with a screwdriver, it felt as if every turn sheared through your temples.

And everything was suddenly too heavy. The weight of your head ended up in the palm of your hands as your fingers desperately tried to cling to the hairline that defined your forehead.

Your cogs floundered in the muddy sand of the seabed that had become your brain. A flooded, clogged and slimy wading pool that struggled to rid itself of the stagnant seaweed that had accumulated until it filtered out the slightest particle of emotion that dared to try and find its way back to the surface. Drowning in your own wading pool. In your own brain, so as not to see the immeasurable extent of the damage inflicted by the tidal wave that had left you shipwrecked.

Shipwrecked. Today, it was difficult to remember when the boat had capsized. Had it happened gradually? As each crew member fell overboard? One after the other. And despite the lifebuoys, despite the rafts, all you could do was watch them sink, helpless as the ocean slowly took what had always belonged to it.

Shipwrecked on a wandering ship, meant to stay afloat despite the shattered hull and torn sails. Sometimes you still wondered why the ocean had chosen never to come and get you. The one that decided to toss you around like a lost buoy in the middle of the blue vastness, the one that made you swallow water at will, knowing full well that salt water couldn't carry you off. The one that dragged you to the open sea with no promise of ever seeing the end of it. Now the ocean was offering you the chance to wash ashore on a white sandbank.

But how do you dock without a captain at the helm?

A broad hand came to rest on your shoulder, engulfing half your shoulder blade, and a few comforting taps pressed against your shoulder.

“How do you know his words?”

Raka. He seemed to have a better grasp of the concept of empathy than did his friend. But you couldn't blame Noa. Even you didn't know how to steer your boat. So to ask a near-stranger to trust you to navigate between waves and sea rocks and reach that sandbank…

And how could you dock without a captain at the helm?

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The world was changing.

And the more you watched it burn away, the more you realized there was no one left. There was no one to tell the story. Radio, TV news, newspapers, books… no one would run them or write them. The human ability to convey an event around the world as we would slip a letter into a mailbox had gone to ashes when the virus had set humanity ablaze.

You no longer knew what the world was becoming, and only its progress could be observed directly through the lens of the camera you'd found in the ruins of a crumbling city center.

There was no one left to hold on to a lost humanity… except you. These history books, these tales of the years that modern society had never had the pleasure of exploring in its own lifetime, but only through the remnants that others recounted - in those historic eras of the birth of societies - were going to be the last. And the world you knew would eventually die in the memories of the few humans who would in turn die out without being able to ensure an offspring.

Only you would be left to remember this humanity. And if you dared to hope that the memories of the apes around you would be passed down through the generations, there was little hope that humans would live on in their memories and the tales you imagined would come to life around the rise of simian societies.

Perhaps that's what prompted you to bring back that camera. A Polaroid you knew would only last a year, or as long as you could find enough to keep it going between the batteries and photo paper it consumed with every click to capture an event, a group of apes fishing, or the sometimes gigantic wooden constructions rising several meters above your head.

Those pictures that were instantly printed would stay. They would tell the story. They would remember the time when humanity had been turned upside down and could not turn back. They would remember the new world that was being built under your admiring gaze. And they wouldn't forget. They wouldn't forget what the world had been, what humans had done and what the world was about to become.

It was important. You couldn't fully imagine how significant it was, but you'd been steeped in history classes and there was something comforting about knowing about a past you'd never witnessed. Perhaps because it was proof… the only proof of the existence of the past.

And if you'd been willing to give up the humanity you'd lived in, you weren't yet ready to forget its existence.

Through the lens, you could see the symbol made from pieces of wood hanging at the entrance to the village. A circle containing the shape of a four-pointed star. The symbol of Caesar, his words and the ideology he embodied. It was the kind of memory one shouldn't forget.

“Why… symbol?”

A sudden jolt.

Your finger pressed the button, completely out of focus on the image you'd just tried to center, and the click was followed by the distinctive sound of a photo printing. Your eyes turned for a second to the owner of the baritone voice as an amused sigh escaped your lips when you saw the blurred picture emerge from the polaroid.

“Because it's important.” You answered casually, a small smile on your face.

Caesar puffed through his nostrils, lips pursed in a brief upward movement as he tried to grasp the interest you had behind every picture you took. He'd seen it all before, thanks to Will. He knew humans liked that sort of thing even if it made no sense to him.

“It's important to remember.”

You went on, again looking into the lens to adjust the image of the symbol. This time, the photo came out clearly and the four-pointed star stood proudly in the center, the angle of the picture making it even more imposing than it was.

Caesar remained silent, his face eternally scowling, but you had a well-trained eye, you spotted a certain curiosity well hidden in the corner of his solemn gaze and you handed him the picture with a big smile.

“Long from now, the apes will be able to remember, thanks to this photo.” You carried on, lowering the camera to observe with your own eyes the life of the apes displayed in front of you.

Caesar listened carefully, and the ridge of his eyes hardened, puzzled by your words.

“Why… keep… the past?”

A very human notion, certainly. What's the point of remembering what yesterday was when today brings everything you need? And you seemed to be asking yourself the same question. Caesar didn't often see you with your eyebrows furrowed, your facial features slightly tense as your eyes sought a suitable answer to give him. Your hand went to the back of your neck to try and soothe the tension in your muscles, and he knew from this simple gesture that you were going to need time to build up a thought that you probably hadn't even considered yet.

You kept this attitude only in those moments when a simple question made you question again everything you were sure of, and Caesar took a certain pride in it. An ape making a human doubt. There was something exhilarating behind this feat. Even if you'd never seemed narrow-minded in your ideas, it was pleasant to see you reflect on a notion that seemed so obvious to you.

Humans were always like that. Sure of themselves and their beliefs. Confident that their values were the best, without questioning for a second their credibility or the nuances that might exist.

Why remember the past? What was the point of knowing about the advent of human societies? The horrors and destructive wars? The great names of men and women who have left their mark on history in one way or another? The great dates, whether of atrocity or freedom?

And beyond human history, and in the more mundane events of everyday life, what was the point of remembering our childhood home? Or that old aunt telling of her travels to the other side of the world? Or that birthday when nobody came?

Your fingers traveled to your wristband, tracing the outlines of the polished bone pieces under Caesar's gaze. If not for this wristband, or this lame hip, what would drive you to remember why Caesar and his kind had taken you under their wings? There was nothing else. Your body had forgotten the torture and pain. There was nothing tangible to prove the existence of abuse apart from that wristband and that hip. The brain was quick enough to forget what was of no use to it or what was too painful to remain in living memory. And if the brain forgot, if there was nothing to remind it to remember, how could one prove the existence of what had been?

And… why should one prove it?

“Because it existed… and… if we forget, how could we do any better?”

Caesar snorted, and you watched his eyes widen dubiously. Had humans done better? He wasn't very knowledgeable about humanity's past, and on second thought, maybe he wasn't interested enough: whatever had been, good or bad today, that's what was important.

“Humans… have they done better?”

Caesar was skeptical, and had every reason to be. On second glance, perhaps humans were doing worse today. The lesson was never learned, and the human was diving headfirst back into his bad habits, making sure to choke on them. This made you smile. His skepticism was right in spite of you, and you even suspected that he knew more about the human species than you did.

“No,” you answered with a giggle. “But apes might.”

There was a glimmer of hope in your eyes. The human cause was lost, and had been for a long time. Even before the virus had spread, humanity had already begun to dig its own grave. Beyond the wars and hatred, the Earth itself was rotting from the inside out under the impact of the human hand. It had only ever been a matter of time before humanity came to the end of its reign.

You weren't even sorry to see your species die out. You were only sorry that it was taking everything else with it.

There was a form of supplication in your eyes. Let the apes do better. Better than wars, better than hatred, better than the destruction of nature, better than the aggressive ambition of some men, better than… the human species in all its consequences.

Caesar raised his head proudly. He was sure of one thing: apes were, in all their consequences, better than humans.

“Apes… don't need… to remember… to do better.”

His gruff voice was adamant, and despite his assurance, a twinge of anxiety settled in the pit of your stomach. How could one do better if no one remembered what had been? You looked up at him, and couldn't help admiring the self-assured features Caesar wore on his face. Broad-shouldered and imposing, his chest puffed out in defiance of anyone who wished to argue with him, what would become of simian society if he were no longer present in the minds of the apes?

You saw it every day. All you had to do was say his name and the apes would bend their backs without batting an eyelid. But none were afraid of him. Caesar had earned the respect of his people because they knew how, thanks to him, they had won their freedom. They respected him and his words, because they remembered.

“In 300 years, don't you want to become the legend of Grumpy Caesar?”

Your gently teasing laugh was greeted by a grumble, probably offended by the nickname you kept harping into his ears, but for the benevolent smile that followed every time, Caesar could never take it the wrong way. It was you, and he'd learned that your words of affection sometimes resembled those teasing words. Those words always followed by a slight, playful shove of the back of your hand against his biceps as your lips stretched happily. He'd also noticed that this was the only time you dared to touch him. And that made him smile.

To become a legend, there was no such thing in the minds of the apes. When his body had breathed the last breath of oxygen that life would grant him, and the sun had decided to stop shining on him, the apes would find another sturdy branch on which to stand. This was how it was meant to be, and his name would become nothing more than the caress of the wind, forgotten once it had gone by.

“Too faraway, apes will forget.”

Caesar preferred to sign these words. Sign language always seemed to have a deeper meaning. When audible words didn't speak loud enough to resonate emotions swallowed up far beneath the ribcage, signs spoke with more truth. A truth that seemed very heavy to you.

The apes will forget. Perhaps that was the truest and saddest thing of all. His name will crumble in the memory of the apes like wood devoured by growing flames. And once the wood has shattered, it will simply lie in a pile of ashes, waiting for the breeze to carry it away and scatter it as it pleases until there's nothing left.

It was his truth. At least, if there was nothing to remind them of him. Your eyes fell on the camera hanging around your neck before settling back on Caesar. He was looking at his people the way he looked at his sons, and if that's all it took to save his name, whether he understood it or not, you'd immortalize the little stones that were building his empire as many times as he'd let you.

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An empire shaped like a ship to endure the years, and when it was the captain's turn to walk the plank to fulfill the ocean's call, the rudder had slipped into your hands. And you accepted it. You knew that sailing against wind and tide would be an arduous task. You knew it. And it seemed to you that you had fought well. Sails wide open to catch as much wind as possible and the remaining crew paddling hard against the pull of fallen anchors. The endeavor had been going on for a long time.

For so long.

For too long.

Every crew member was an anchor desperately dragged along by the ship you were trying to keep afloat until the mainsail gave way. The increasing weight and the fading wind had worn away the fabric until only the tatters floated scattered in the wind. And the boat that had sailed at full speed for so long found itself slowing down… more and more, until the natural swell of the blue vastness became its only driving force.

No matter whether you wanted to go to port or starboard, the ocean pushed the boat in the direction it thought best without ever consulting you, sometimes leading it into storms where the sea grew high above the masts. You often watched helplessly as the huge waves crashed over the deck, washing away the rubble that an earlier storm had caused, and soon, shipwreck would be bound to occur.

How long had you been at the helm before you let go? A rudder that had let you down long before you gave up. And how long had you just watched that rudder go from left to right at the mercy of the ocean without doing anything about it?

You weren’t sure how to act upon it. As natural as it had been in the past, navigating Caesar’s memory again across this ocean had become a mystery.

If time hadn’t run its best sprint, perhaps there would have been a time when explaining would have been easy.

But today…

Today, the sand bank on the horizon might just become a mere illusion.

Your glassy gaze fell on Raka as he watched your fingers run over the frame and brush against Caesar's image. Such a simple question demanded an equally simple answer. But was it really? Telling them that you'd known him would most certainly trigger a cataclysm that would turn your dilapidated ship upside down, and you were already lacking strength at the mere thought of having to put it back afloat. Swimming to the end of an endless journey was not in your plans, even if the countdown to impact was already ticking away in front of your eyes.

Raka's green eyes eventually found yours, and a series of soft hootings encouraged you to speak as you could only swallow as you spoke anxiously.

“ What about you… how do you know them?”

You watched his gaze slide from your eyes to Noa's, who was listening to your conversation with great interest. His curious stare dropped like a domino to the gauntlet on his left hand, and with a precise gesture, Noa pulled out a pendant crafted from what looked like white wood.

A pendant in the shape of…

“The order of Caesar, naturally!” Raka exclaimed as if it was an obvious fact.

A four-pointed star.

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[ohsalome]

the intention of comparing the reaction to Palestine vs Ukraine is typically not to criticize Ukrainian victims of war. The criticism is directed at American spectators, because the people in power here are insanely anti Palestinian but have made overtures to help Ukraines resistance efforts despite comparable situations. Regular citizens also mostly support Ukraine but many hate Palestinians. People are just comparing palestine to Ukraine as a point of reference to try to make those people understand.

As kindly as possible, I do not think you can educate people out of islamophobia by appealing to their conscience, at the very least because if they had one they wouldn't be islamophobic in the first place.

And when it comes to people in power, appealing to their empathy in the case with Palestine is fruitless because the help Ukraine got wasn't motivated by emotion either. I do not expect you to know the history of current russo-ukrainian war well, so you probably don't know that the western world was perfectly happy to watch russia roll all over us punishment-free as long as they felt that other "properly european countries" won't be involved. Russia has been butchering us since 2014, and nobody gave a fuck about it. Even during the first few weeks of the full-scale invasion NATO refused to send us any military help, because they expected us to fall and were okay with it.

The current support we have did not fall on us from the sky by the graceful kindness of "our american overlords" - it is a consequence of the cumulative effort of our diplomats, pre-existing agreements with NATO countries, and the economical ripples the full-scale war caused (Ukraine being one of the major world exporters of grain being one of the most relevant).

This is why, sadly Palestine cannot follow the Ukrainian scenario of foreign support. The surrounding circumstances of both of our wars are way to different, and while it is easy to ignore them while making simplistic quick-dopamine-hit posts on hellbr dot com, they do influence the real-world situation on the ground. Which is what posts like the one I replied to do - they create a no-nuance misinformed image of the war in Ukraine. Which amplifies the problem even more, because even though "most americans" can agree on a generic "war in Ukraine bad", their idea of what is going on here is hugely misinformed as it is. And this has harmful real-life consequences on which our very survival depends.

Look. I understand that the war between Palestine and Israel has been going on for decades. I understand that there are many contexts that are obvious to the people in the respective countries that I am oblivious to by the virtue of never being there and not speaking arabic nor hebrew. I understand that there is a lot of propaganda that I may accidentally spread out of my ignorance, and therefore I try to be careful to avoid doing so, out of respect to the people living there. So why is it too much to ask you to give the same respect to us?

Like I have said before, the biggest issue with that infographic post is that it spreads misinformation. In the simplest of terms, misinformation is bad. People are trying to do any smallest thing to help Palestinians - who are currently barely surviving in inhumanely horrifying conditions - and out of ignorance they are spreading anti-ukrainian propaganda. Downplaying the number of ukrainian victims (and, as a result, making russian war crimes look "not as bad") is anti-ukrainian propaganda. Making it seem as we are getting "too much american help" is anti-ukrainian propaganda, because USA is our biggest military exporter, and getting less ammo/vehicles/etc will have catastrophic effect on the amount of death.

Which is why am not staying silent on this, even if your collective intentions are noble and good. Because, I will repeat myself again, your intentions do not matter if the consequences of your actions are harmful. And if (a) comparing Ukraine and Palestine is uneffective; (b) it portrays your ignorance of either one or both of the wars; and (c) simultaneously with spreading support for the palestinian cause you are spreading harmful anti-ukrainian pro-russian propaganda, I do not think it is too much to ask you to stop.