#But usually if someone on here makes a mistake it’s an honest one & they will rectify it if you notify them
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stuckinapril · 9 months ago
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#I think people treat others on here who share any sort of news like they’re actual professional journalists and we’re not#I genuinely don’t think a single person on here is#We’ve just taken it upon ourselves to share the news bc the actual journalists are the ones who mince words and have ulterior motives etc#But usually if someone on here makes a mistake it’s an honest one & they will rectify it if you notify them#You do not have to attack them or say they’re misleading on purpose like I think most ppl on here#Don’t have that sort of agenda. At least the ones who’re fighting for legitimate causes like Palestinian and Sudanese genocide etc etc#I just hope no one on here gets attacked in light of the Samara situation#I just think we should be more open to making mistakes instead of jumping to bad faith interpretations#News have to be accurate but mistakes r also ok and usually a simple communication resolves it#Tumblr is the bad faith interpretation website so I’m not surprised but I also think we need to be more graceful#Bc how else can anyone improve / learn more etc etc#Whenever someone on here shares an opposing opinion it’s not that I dislike that or want to intentionally suppress it#It’s usually just framed in a very inflammatory way that doesn’t even give me the opportunity to give my side and might motivate other ppl#To think I’m basically like a normal journalist who intentionally misleads 💀💀 I am An Iraqi Girl Who Is Trying To Help#At least this has taught me how to gracefully own up to mistakes and take accountability etc that’s pretty cool#Bc even w all that said I think it’s important to hold urself accountable if u do make a mistake regardless of intention.#We just shouldn’t demonize making mistakes bc how can someone grow Ok I’m done
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possamble · 4 months ago
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Ooff I see that threesome WIP. Appreciate all that warning. I don't think I have the heart in me to read that hahaha. Just feels weird to have two women in a relationship and insert a man for funsies. But hey, maybe it's just me being being into only Farcille and them being monogamous and only for each other. I'm just gonna pretend it's a separate Falin and Marcille from a little creature universe so I won't look at them differently when I read the fic hahaha. Still will be reading anything else from you though. You're one of my favorite fic writers and will be waiting patiently for updates!!
I truly appreciate you being frank with what you want and don't want to read and being civil about it-- but I have to say. I'd understand and accept if you looked at me differently for making that kind of content. Maybe I'm not the kind of creator you thought I was, or my creative priorities don't line up with yours, and maybe you enjoy my content less because of that. That's all fine and well--you have every right to curate your own fandom experience and I encourage everyone to do so.
But it's very curious that you specifically said that you'd look at the characters differently. I would understand if you wanted to separate them bc it doesn't fit into your preferred image of them and that's all. But at first glance, your wording implies that they would be somehow tarnished for you if they decided to sleep with a male friend for fun some years down the line.
I don't know you, and I won't pretend I have any standing to interrogate you on a minor word choice. But here's an unsolicited heads up, if you'd humor me: you may want to examine where that sentiment is coming from. It could very well just be a knee-jerk reaction to non-monogamous content for your favourite pairing (I get that, I'm usually the one privately bitching when I see Marcille or Falin shipped with anyone else) but it could also be coming from a place that's very disparaging to adult wlw who sleep with men of their own volition. And I hope you'll agree that's something worth being wary of in yourself.
#asks#sorry if this is more wary than is necessary#if you want the full context this all was part of a fun idea i had with a mutual on twitter#who has since been getting anonymous death threats and accused of being someone who supports corrective rape.#so im just very frustrated with the general response#listen. im as surprised as you are. IM the man-hater monogamist who gets leery when people start involving men into sapphic pairings#and itd be INCREDIBLY different if both characters were canonically confirmed lesbians and i was bending their characters#specifically to benefit my own fantasies#but we're all here playing make believe. and i found something compelling and fun in exploring this side of their characters#make no mistake: if you hate it and youre gossiping/shittalking me in private circles im GRATEFUL.#im happy that you have a space to vent and be vocal about things that upset you#and that you arent so isolated and unhappy that you feel the need to attack me directly to somehow vocalize your feelings.#anyway. it was a lighthearted one-off concept that i had a lot of fun exploring#and my work speaks for itself. if you think that id write the usual male-centric drivel where theyre worshipping his dick#instead of a fun honest and candid experience that the three of them had for their own reasons#then theres already nothing i can do to change your mind#and i still unironically commend you for actively curating your own experience and choosing what you do and dont want to interact with.#edit to add that im talking about the general you in the tags not anyone specifically
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magics-neptunes-things · 5 months ago
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Solace
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Hi guys!
This is a massive one again, it count like 12K words. I proofread it like four time but it's big so it might still have several mistakes. And I'm sorry about it ♥
Please enjoy, I really loved working for this one :)
TW : Mention of cheating, Angst.
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You never thought that your ex-girlfriend would hurt you that way. You were with Jenni for two years when she left Barcelona to go to play in Mexico. You were gutted honestly, even if you never shared the same flat, she was always in yours. Or you were always with her. It was only when you were called in national camp that you weren’t together.
With you being Australian and Jenni being Spanish, it was logical that you weren’t on the same team. Unlike Jenni, you weren’t really a player very needed by your team. More like the number two. Even in Barcelona you are the second goalkeeper behind Cata. And in Australia, there is Mackenzie Arnold, but you can’t be sad or mad at anyone because they just are amazing.
Jenni left after the World Cup and seemed to settle very quickly and easily in her new team and world. You aren’t surprised to be honest; Jenni has always been like this. Easygoing, smiling and very sociable.
You didn’t know that this part of her will lead you to a breakup. Jenni didn’t have the courage to tell herself that she cheated, you learned it like almost all the rest of the world, when pictures started appearing on Internet.
When you talked with Jenni about it, she tried to deny or make things less serious than they were before finally told the truth. She told you that yes, she met someone else, but it isn’t serious, it was just to have fun. It has nothing to do with what you have together.
Blah, blah, blah.
You couldn’t forgive her. It’s not like she just shared a random kiss in a creepy nightclub. They had dates, they kissed and even slept together several times. You didn’t say anything on social media about your breakup or Jenni’s betrayal. You just deleted all your pictures where you were together.
Your teammates took care of you. Marta and Caro brought you breakfast every morning, Lucy brought you back scones from England when she went there, Cata slept every night on your couch just to be with you (you are pretty sure that’s it was because she misses her girlfriend too), Ona shared with you her very impressive DVD’s collection, Alexia always made sure that you aren’t alone for the drill, Jana always sat with you on the bus or plane, Mariona invited you to pass several days in Mallorca in her family and Ingrid took you shopping at least twice a month.
You love them for that, honestly. You couldn’t ask for better friends. But Barcelona keeps remembering you of Jenni. So, when your agent informed you that he received an offer for you from Arsenal, you don’t hesitate a lot.
It was heartbreaking to say goodbye to your teammates and Barcelona’s fans to be honest. You really love this place, but you needed to see something else. Maybe you’ll come back in several years, that’s what you said to a tearful Jana after your speech.
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The first days at Arsenal are strange to be honest, but you are glad to have others Australians teammates here. Caitlin, Steph and Kyra seemed happy to have you there and help you settle down. You are still talking daily to your former teammates, but the trio help you to feel better.
They never talked to you about your breakup, they knew you were with Jenni and that you aren’t anymore. Like the rest of the world after all. You don’t know what Jenni told her friends and family, you liked her brother and her parents, but you couldn’t saw them after that. The breakup is one thing, but dealing with betrayal is something else.
You usually don’t go to the team bonding, but tonight Kyra almost rolled herself at your feet, begging you to come. A little less dramatic, Steph just told you that she will be happy if you come while Caitlin rolled her eyes at Kyra. So here you are, looking at yourself in the mirror of your bedroom.
You look at yourself and wonder what in you wasn’t enough to make Jenni stay. Sur, you were in two different continents, but you never thought a single second about being unfaithful to your girl… ex-girlfriend.
The bell ring when Kyra is here to take you to Leah’s, taking you out of your thoughts. It’s maybe better like this. You can only smile when your friend gives you a big smile.
“I’m so happy you’re coming Y/N honestly. It will be fun, you’ll see.”
“Yeah, I’ll see” you smirk.
She slaps you playfully on your shoulder before starting her car and you promise yourself not to go anywhere with Kyra in her car anymore.
“Yeah, the baby Aussies!” Katie shout when you enter Leah’s house.
Caitlin just smiles at you at first, but soon come to take you away from Kyra when the younger one start to drag you everywhere without your consent.
“Leah ordered pizzas and we are going to watch one film or two. It’s great that you are here, really” Caitlin smiles at you.
You smile back and accept the drink she gives you. You smell it with skepticism when you learn that Beth made them, but after tasting it you have to admit that it’s pretty great. But your teammates are loud, and you aren’t used to this kind of noise anymore. You soon started to feel overwhelmed, and you look for somewhere quieter to sit.
You finally find a place on a couch, where Lia and Alessia are talking casually. Their corporal language tell you that it isn’t an important or secret conversation, but you still approach them shyly, half hiding behind your glass.
“Would you mind if I sit with you?”
“Not at all” Lia smiles at you.
Alessia smiles too and get closer to Lia to let you a bigger place next to her. She has a beautiful smile, you never really realized it before.
“I was just saying to Alessia that she should make a stop in Switzerland next time she goes in Italy. It isn’t far away after all.”
You smile and nod. Of course, you know that Lia comes from Switzerland and Alessia is half Italian, thanks to her dad.
“I never went to Switzerland or even Italy” you admit softly.
It seems to take your interlocutors’ attention and they both start to list the advantages of both countries. But you are interested by it, both girls are calm but still funny and it’s exactly the kind of conversation you needed right now.
When Leah comes in the living room with the pizzas, the team passes almost fifteen minutes to choose a film on Netflix. You are listening to their fight with a soft smile, really amused by it.
“It’s like this every single time” Alessia whispers to you with a smile. “I usually chose this moment to take the best pizza part, even a second if they really are fighting hard.”
You laugh softly, pleasantly surprised by Alessia’s confidences. You haven’t really talked a lot to her, to be honest. But she seems to be a very cute and sweet girl, everyone can see that. You are thankful to her about her small chat so you decide to get along with it.
“Alright, tell me, how do you chose your first part?” you ask Alessia while Katie is explaining why Kim’s choice isn’t good.
“I take the cheesiest one, and if it has the basil leaf on it, it’s the best thing ever. Seems like I have to make a choice for now though.”
You look at her looking attentively at the pizza in front of you. She doesn’t seem to be bothered by the others’ tantrum at all. She finally chooses the cheesy one before turning herself in your direction.
“What about you? How do you choose your first part?”
“I love pizza dough. I usually take the one with the biggest crust” you admit.
“I never heard someone choosing her part like this” Alessia giggles.
Her giggles make you smile, and you lean to take your part too. It happens to be the one with the basil leaf and you put it on Alessia’s part without a second though.
“Ok, you are not allowed to seat next to someone else when pizzas are involved now.”
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“So you feel better now?”
Alexia’s voice resonates in your bathroom from your phone where you putted the speaker while getting ready.
“Yeah I mean the girls had always been lovely but that evening really helped me to be included in the team, I think.”
“That’s great, I’m really happy for you. They would have been stupid not to do it though, you are the most lovely girl ever.”
You smile, you know that she is really happy for you. Since your departure, you kept writing with some of your former teammates and Alexia is one of them. You sometimes suspect that she knows what you whispered into Jana’s ear, when you said that you might come back someday. But you are happy to have news from her.
“What about you? What’s new in Barcelona Femeni?”
“We all miss you, honestly” she begins. “But it’s been great. The new signings are settling great I think.”
“And yourself?”
“I’m fine. Olga has been great too. We, hum, she’s leaving with me now, when she’s in Barcelona.”
“That’s great Capi, I’m happy for you.”
You know how close Alexia is to Jenni, but the blonde never said any words about your ex-girlfriend since your breakup. You are glad about it honestly, but you like when she talks about her relationship. You are really happy for her; she seems so happy lately. And she deserves it.
You aren’t lying to Alexia; you maybe need to thank Kyra for taking you out of your house that night. Since that day you are pretty close from Lia who seems to really want to take you in Switzerland with all the discussions you have about it. You talk a lot to Laia Codina too, the girl seems happy to have someone she can speak Spanish with, you learned the language pretty well during the five years you were in Barcelona. You laugh and joke with Katie and you are of course really close to Caitlin and Steph.
And there is Alessia, too. You like sitting next to her during the trips or the meals, she is pretty calm but, in another hand, she always has something to say or to laugh about. But you feel relaxed next to her, a thing you haven’t really felt since a long time.
It’s scared you a little bit, to be honest. At first you wanted to put some distance between you and her, you don’t want to get attached to someone or feeling the need of having a special someone in your life. But Alessia is so sweet and seems so concerned about your well-being that you can’t stay away from her.
This is the third night out where you go today, it’s at Steph’s house this time. You decided to curl your hair tonight, but still go with your eternal jeans and t-shirt anyway.
You wait someone in your car when you are in front of Steph’s house, not wanting to go inside alone. You just have to wait two minutes before you see Vic coming and you follow her inside after having greeted her.
A lot of your teammates are here, and the atmosphere is a little more festive than the others. You can see that some of them are a little tipsy already and you smirk when you see Kyra’s state. Thanks God, you aren’t the one getting her home tonight.
“What about a have you ever?” someone randomly propose at one point.
You are not a fan of it honestly, but you don’t want to kill the fun. Looking around, you see that almost all of your teammates accepted the game, only Lia rolls her eyes with a little smile. You sit next to Caitlin who greets your presence next to her with a smile and a tap on your back.
The game went pretty well to be honest; you even have fun. Some of girls were more or less asked to explain themselves about specifics questions, making their teammates laugh or smile.
It was until Manu asked a very accurate question.
“Have you ever been a cheater in a relationship?”
There is an abrupt silence in the room, who last probably only two seconds, but for you it’s an eternity. Suddenly, someone rings the bell at the door and Leah almost jump from the couch.
“It’s the pizzas, it’s for me!”
“I’ll help you” you mumble before getting up too, not looking at everyone.
Leah doesn’t react when you talk or follow her to the door, the most far possible from the couch you were sitting on. She refuses your pounds to help her pay but puts some of the box in your hands. When you come back into the room, everyone was in a small talk and you still follow Leah, putting the box on the table this time.
You aren’t really hungry to be honest, but Steph puts a plate with a slice on your knees. You take a look and realize that there is a lot of cheese on it and almost no crust, making you sulk. Then you raise your gaze up to meet Alessia’s and her pizza slice. With a smile you get up and silently swap them.
After the pizzas, you decide to go in Steph’s garden, breathing a little bit of fresh air. You haven’t thought that you will be hearing a conversation between Steph and Manu, your compatriot roasting the goalkeeper.
“What the hell were you thinking?” you hear Steph whisper-shout.
“I don’t know! I thought that not asking Who has ever been cheat on was okay!”
You can perfectly picture Manu talking with her hands and Steph leaning in her direction, deeply frowning.
“I never wanted to hurt her or make her uncomfortable! I’ll go excuse myself to her.”
“You better not. Leave her alone.”
You can hear every single word and it’s maybe even worse. You know very well that Manu never wanted to hurt you, she’s a very sweet girl. But very clumsy sometimes with her words.
“You ok Kiddo?”
Caitlin’s voice makes you jump, but you give her a brave smile anyway.
“Yeah, I mean… Yeah.”
Hands in the pockets of your jeans, you shrug when she raises an eyebrow. That wasn’t the most explicit and understandable sentence. Caitlin comes to stand next to you, looking closely at you.
“You know you can talk to me, right? I mean I wasn’t with you when it happened, but if you need to…”
“I know Cait, thanks” you smile softly. “You weren’t in Barcelona, but you still checked on me. I haven’t forgotten it. But I don’t know if there is a lot to say, to be honest.”
Realizing that you don’t want to talk and not being the one to push the others, Caitlin just passes an arm around your shoulders to give you a hug. It’s comforting to be honest, you never thought that you will say that one day, but you kind of miss your Spanish’s teammates hugs and touch.
“It will get better with time” Caitlin whispers.
You nod and enjoy the hug as long as you can, Caitlin doesn’t seem to want to let you go. It was until you saw Katie’s coming in the garden too. Maybe stupidly, you gently push Caitlin away from you, making the Irish smirks.
“Don’t worry, I can share her with you”
Caitlin smiles and rolls her eyes.
“Mmmmmh. Nah, only for hugs actually” Katie adds, kissing her girlfriend’s head. “But I can share one of my guestrooms with you, if you feel too alone someday. You don’t even have to ask before coming.”
“Thanks” you smile.
Several hours later, you are turning on your mattress in Steph’s living room, unable to fall asleep. Even if your teammates tried to change your ideas, now that you are alone with your thoughts, you have trouble to fall asleep. Some of them went home but a lot of them decided to sleep here.
Your mind won’t shut up and you are getting crazy. The moment when you learned about Jenni cheating turn in your head on and on. The feelings you had, the questions you have since that day.
Why has she done that, why weren’t you enough, has she ever been really in love with you or were you just a hobby to pass time?
Scared to wake some of your teammates up, you finally decided to get up to go to the garden on more time. You miss the Spanish’s heat and shiver when you meet the English’s cold.
You don’t know how many times you stayed here before you feel somebody presence behind you.
“Hi” Alessia says softly.
“Hi” you whisper back without looking at her.
You look at her from the corner of your eyes after several minutes, to see that she’s looking at the sky. Like this, her eyes seem even bluer than they already are. Realizing that you are starring, you hurry to look at something else.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Alessia finally asks.
“No” you mumble, frowning.
Like a lot of people in Arsenal, you don’t have talked with Alessia about the end of your relationship. Or your relationship itself. You never asked Alessia about her love life either, the kind of crush you are developing for her being scary enough for you like this.
“I’m sorry you have to go through this” the blonde finally says. “I never had to deal with things like this, but I can imagine how hard it is.”
“It’s not only about the end of the relationship, but also a lot about the betrayal too. I never thought we will be endgame, but I was really attached to her, and I trusted her with my whole life. This raises so many questions in me…”
Alessia is looking at you, you can feel her eyes on you. But it’s not the kind of invading look, you can almost feel her concern in the way she looks at you.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
You put your eyes on her, but you don’t really need it to understand that there is no push in the proposition. She just wants to help you to sort it out, if you want to.
“I just… don’t understand, I guess. Why has she done that? And why saying that it wasn’t true at first?”
“I can’t answer at her place” Alessia answers with a sad face. “Have you tried to talk to her about it?”
“No. I blocked her everywhere and unfollowed her teammates in case of they wanted to write me on Instagram or something. Our mutual friends are clever enough not to get in the middle of that.”
Alessia nods, seeming lost in her thoughts. She is still looking at you though.
“All I can say is that you deserve someone who will really take care of you. She wasn’t the one, obviously. You deserve the best.”
You shrug, not exactly knowing what to answer to that. You aren’t sure about it to be honest, if you deserve the best why do you have to deal with that kind of things? You probably have done something wrong; you just don’t know what.
“Hey, none of that” Alessia says like she can read your mind, slapping playfully your shoulder.
“I just keep thinking that maybe I deserved it. It makes me doubt about anyone, even my friend. If my girlfriend, the person who is supposed to love the most, thought that I wasn’t interesting enough, how can friends like me? And why? Are they really feeling that I deserve their attention or is it just pity?” you whisper, feeling your tears coming.
“Come here.”
She doesn’t let you the choice before hugging you, in a bones-crushed hug. But you needed it, honestly. Caitlin’s one was good, but this one is really special. Probably because of the girl hugging you. It’s scary and comforting at the same time.
“She’s the one who should question herself, not you. You are kind, you are lovely, you are beautiful, you are funny, you are clever… You have everything. She the one who lost someone great, not you. And I think I’m not only talking for myself when I say that we all love you here. We love you and we care for you, just like your former teammates, aren’t they keep messaging or calling you?”
“Yes, they are” you mumble in Alessia’s shoulder. “Thank you.”
She kisses your cheek, letting her lips press against your cheek a little longer than a usual friend kiss, the sweet girl trying to give you the most comfort possible. It works though, but you are not sure that it’s for the good reason. But once again, you don’t have the strength to get away from her.
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That night, you made yourself the promise not to show any romantics feeling toward Alessia. Because you realized that it’s already too late for you to try to fight those feelings. You know that Alessia is sweet, but so was Jenni before she decided to cheat on you. You are not sure about Alessia sexuality anyway and there is no world where you ask her the question, it would been too strange. You don’t want anything to change between both of you.
The fans started to realize that Alessia had became your “team buddy” like they like to say, just like Jana were when you were still in Barcelona. She usually sits next to you in the bus, you drive her to the training or the home games and you stay at each other house sometimes after training. Some people are joking about Ella and Jana being replaced, making you roll your eyes when Alessia mentioned it. You love Jana, but never thought about her in any way other than friend. Which isn’t the case for Alessia.
You take the habit to cuddle against her when you are watching a movie at home, and you are surprised that she took you herself against her for the next movie during a team bonding. You try your best to erase any surprise on your face, but you catch Leah and Caitlin’s eyes on you, and you can’t hide the blush creeping on your cheeks. Leah doesn’t seem upset or trying to make fun of you, she seems to be thinking. It’s harder to read Caitlin’s look.
When you raise your eyes on Alessia’s face, she’s watching peacefully the film, so you decide to imitate her, ignoring Leah and Caitlin whispers.
“Hey Kiddo, can I talk to you?” Caitlin asks you after a training session.
Almost all of the girls have already left and the ones who stayed aren’t looking or listening to you. You saw that Katie left already and Alessia is still under the shower, her hair routine being incredibly long.
“Sure” you smile at your teammate.
She smiles and sits next to you in your cubby, looking straight into your eyes. Hers are inquisitive and you can’t keep looking at them, even if there is no trace of something negative.
“I just wanted to know how you are feeling, after Steph’s party. I know Katie kind of interrupt, but if there is something bothering you, you can come to me.”
“I know” you smile affectionally at the older girl. “I trust you. It’s just that I don’t even know where to start.”
“What about we start about you and Alessia?” Caitlin asks, raising an eyebrow.
“What do you mean?”
You try to put your best poker face here, but you are not sure it will work. Caitlin knows you since you are 17, from the first time you were called in Australia senior team when their first goalkeeper got injured.
“I myself fell in love with a teammate. Twice. The second wasn’t at all planned but here we are. I know the signs.”
There is a small smile on Caitlin’s face, and you sigh softly. There is almost no one in the locker room now, only Vic talking very fast and very Dutch in her phone. And Caitlin isn’t screaming either, there is no way that Vic can hear both of you. Looking at your feet, you frown before answering.
“You are right, but nothing will happen” you whisper, throat clenched. You shouldn’t be sad like that. “It’s not a good idea to fall for someone so fast after being cheated on and Alessia definitely isn’t sharing those feelings.”
Caitlin offers you an empathic smile, putting her hand on your shoulder. It makes you raise your eyes on her again.
“You can’t control your feelings. Jenni was a bitch to you, but you can’t let her and her mistakes decide of the rest of your life. What she did to you was wrong, it wasn’t deserved in any way. You have to fight for your happiness Kiddo, with Less or someone else.”
You bite your lip softly; you know that Caitlin is right in a way. You can’t let Jenni’s actions guide your life. But there is another problem here.
“I don’t want to take risks and lose Alessia. I really need her in my life right now. Do you… Do you know if she’s really straight?”
“No, I don’t, I’m sorry. We can try to figure out though.”
You really didn’t expect that Caitlin will ask Katie to help you both figuring out. You were thinking that Cait’ would asks Alessia during a private conversation or something like that. Not during a party in a nightclub, and not by Katie suddenly asking out loud
“We need to find you someone Less! The MVP of the game needs to have some fun tonight. Show me what kind of person you like, and I will go to talk to them.”
You almost chock on your drink, making Beth tap you a little harder than needed on your back. Alessia is looking at Katie with wide eyes when you can breathe again.
“Come on! What about him?” the Irish asks, pointing a random man on the crowd (you grimace). “Or him? Or maybe you’re on the good side and into girls too?”
Alessia went bright red and Caitlin smirks at you. You have your answer, but you don’t really like to see Alessia being so uncomfortable. You would have prefer the soft manner.
“Leave her alone, you evil” you say, putting a protective hand on Alessia knee.
Katie chuckles and stands up, taking Caitlin by the hand to drag her on the dance floor after having kissed in apology Alessia on the head. You knew that you wouldn’t see both of them until tomorrow morning.
“Are you okay?” you ask Alessia.
You feel guilty for her discomfort, she always has been nothing but sweet and caring with you. But she smiles at you and squeezes the hand you still have on her knee.
“I am. Don’t worry.”
It’s really hard not to fall in love even harder when she smiles at you like that. You gave her a weak smile back, forcing yourself not to let your eyes fall in her lips when she mixes your fingers together under the table. You are trying so hard that you missed the look Beth and Leah exchanged at the same moment.
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“Come on, please! You can’t miss my birthday!”
Alexia’s pleading voice makes you smile. She’s whining like a little child and to be honest how much she wants you to be her makes you very happy.
“Alright La Reina, I’ll be there.”
The happy scream Alexia let out make you laugh.
“Too bad I wasn’t recording that, it would have made TikTok mad” you smirk.
“Callate. So, you are coming, would you like to sleep at mine?”
“No, I don’t want to disturb you. I’ll ask Jana, don’t worry. You will have already a lot to think about.”
“Nothing actually, Alba and Mama are organizing the party alone. I’m not even allowed to choose my cake.”
You are not surprised. You know how much Alba is willing to help her sister to lose control over things, organizing her birthday is a way to help Alexia cool down. And Eli is definitely the one person needed to control her younger daughter energy in the process.
“What do you want for gift?”
“Nothing, just you coming is enough.”
“Well I have to find enough gift paper to wrap myself in it.”
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“Y/N, you’re coming Saturday, right?”
You raise your eyes on Kyra, standing in front of you. She’s the one organizing the party this weekend and you know how much she’s looking for it. But you won’t be able to make it.
“No Kyra, I’m sorry. I won’t be in London that weekend.”
“What? Where are you going?” she asks, frowning.
You saw behind her Alessia looking at you, just like Leah.
“It’s Alexia’s birthday. She asked me to come, and I said yes. I haven’t seen them for ages, and we don’t have any game or training for two days, so…”
You shrug while Kyra pouts and you give her a smile before pinching her cheek.
“Aw don’t be sad Kyky. I’m sure you will have fun and I’ll take you back some Sangria, okay?”
“Don’t call me Kyky” she whines, slapping your hand away. “And I want Sangria and Iberic ham.”
You smile when she turns your back to you to go to Steph and you finish to put your things in your bag. When you are finished, you sit again just to see that Alessia is looking at you.
“Are you ready?” you ask, and she nods.
Like almost every day, you drive her home with your car. The journey to the parking is silent and you can see from the corner of your eyes that there is a wrinkle between Alessia’s eyebrow.
“Are you okay?” you finally ask after the middle of the trip for her house.
Alessia is usually very talkative, and she hasn’t said a single word, looking by the window of your car, which you find it very worrying.
“Yeah” she just answers.
She gives you a soft smile and starts to look again by the window. You decide not to insist, so you put your eyes on the road in front of you. But not after thirty seconds, you feel Alessia’s hand looking for yours, linking your fingers like she took the habits since several weeks now.
Your heart fluttered every single time.
“Am I still invited to diner?” you ask when you parked your car in front of Alessia’s house.
“Of course you are!”
She’s frowning, seeming offended by your question. But it makes you smile and without thinking about your move, you kiss her hand before getting out of the car. You breath again when Alessia get out too, not mentioning or showing any discomfort about your gesture.
Alessia decided for a pasta night, she promised you to make you try one of her Nona’s receipts. You help her with the vegetables, cutting them for her.
“When are you leaving for Spain?” she asks while stirring the sauce.
“Saturday morning. I take the first flight to be able to enjoy the most of time possible. And I’m coming back on Sunday night, I’ll take the last flight.”
Alessia nods softly, concentrated on her sauce. Well, that’s what you think she’s doing. You don’t know that there is a hurricane in her head at that moment.
“Do you want me to take you to the airport?”
“I’d love to, but it’s really early, Lessi.”
It’s not what seems to retain her attention.
“I like when you call me Lessi. People usually go for Less.”
She looks at you with a smile and you can’t help but smile back. That girl really has the most sweet, cute and amazing smile in the world. How much you want to kiss her right now might not be healthy.
“I’ll drive you. I don’t care if it’s at 4 in the morning.”
She doesn’t seem to let you any opportunity to make her change her mind, so you just accept her proposition.
Alessia proposed you a glass of red wine to drink with the pasta and you accept, curious to see what kind of wine are the Italian one. You only know the Spanish and the French for now. You don’t drink a lot and Alessia neither, during the party with the team you sometimes drink a glass and that’s all.
So, after three glasses and the pasta, you maybe are a little tipsy when you find yourself in the couch with Alessia. She puts a movie on TV, but you are way more focused on the fact to keep your hands in the right places, even if you are cuddling with the blonde. Your skin is on fire where she strokes your arm with her fingertips.
When the effects she has on you are starting to remember you the not really PG18 dreams you sometimes have about her, you stand from the couch to go take a drink in her kitchen. You take advantage of being in the kitchen to splash cold water on your face to cool down like you can.
But when you join Alessia again on the couch, she rolls to be lying with her front totally on your stomach, one of her legs between yours.
“I’m going to miss you this weekend” she mumbles, eyes still on the screen.
“I will miss you too” you answer, playing with her hair.
“No sense. You will find back all of your friends from Barcelona. You won’t even have the time to think about me.”
“Now you’re the one talking no sense” you whisper.
You are not really sure that she heard you at first, because she doesn’t say anything or doesn’t move. But then she’s pushing on her hands to sit down and turn herself to face you.
“Really?”
Her baby blue eyes are scanning you, but you don’t look away. You are like hypnotized by her.
“Of course, Lessi.”
Your hands went naturally on her thighs and you feel your heart beating fast when she leans on you, her forehead finally softly pressed against yours.
“What are you doing?” you whisper.
You don’t know why you are scared. It’s Alessia. You know you can trust her. You never have been able to look at her so closely and you know that you will never see something more beautiful. Her eyes are looking for something in yours when she strokes softly your cheek with her hand.
“I’m going to kiss you”
Even if it’s more of a statement than a question, she waits for the small nod you give her to break the last centimeters separating your lips. The first kiss is just a small press of her lips on yours, but the fireworks in your brain are still here.
Your breath hitch, but then she’s kissing you a second time and you take advantage of having her sitting on your lap to pass a hand on her neck and deepens the kiss. After several time – you lost track of time since long – she whimpers, and you know you have to stop here if you don’t want to lose your mind.
“Lessi” you try to talk when your lips are separated for you to breathe again.
A small hum makes you understand that she heard you, even if she starts to kiss your jaw.
“Lessi, we need to – of fuck.”
She just bites your neck, and you will probably combust in a few seconds. No one kissed you for ages, even when you were still in relationship with Jenni. She was across the world after all. And the one touching you right now is Alessia, the girl you are dreaming off days and nights.
“Alessia, please” you try again, totally breathless. “We need to slow down.”
“But why?”
She’s frowning when she detached her lips from your neck to look at you. Her lips are swollen, her cheeks are pink and what you can see in her eyes make you shudder. You still have to shake you mentally though.
“Because, if we keep things that way, I will probably lose my mind at some point. And you drunk wine, so you are not totally in control. And you have no ideas about the affects you have on me”
“But I want it. I’m very aware of what we are doing” she whispers, stroking your lips with hers. “I waited for it for so long.”
“I don’t want it to be a one-time thing” you whisper back.
It’s maybe not the moment to show some vulnerability, but you have to be honest with her and with yourself. You know that it might take you away from what you are sharing right now, but you probably won’t survive a deception with her.
It seems to touch Alessia though, because she’s sitting a little more to have a better look at you. And then you can see a glimpse of tenderness between the lust and the want.
“Me neither.”
Your heart jump in your chest and after looking at her for a second more, just to be sure that you understood correctly, you take her again against you to kiss her.
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“You’re glowing!”
You roll your eyes at Lucy’s sentence when she great you at Barcelona airport. You hug her bag anyway, before turning to face Ona.
“Don’t make that face, it’s true” the Spaniard smirks.
“Talk for yourself. I never seen you looking so good” you say before turning to Lucy with a smirk. “You, in another hand, you are aging.”
“Piss off” Lucy says, hitting you on the head.
You laugh and pass your hand around her shoulders, assuring her that you are joking. You are happy to be back to be honest, you miss Barcelona. The smell is so different from London, and you feel a wave of nostalgia take you when Lucy drives you in the streets.
You are supposed to sleep to Jana’s for the weekend, but she had a duty that she couldn’t skip, so the golden couple from Barcelona took on them to take you from the airport. You know that a lot of your ex-teammates would come for you if you had ask. You take advantage of the small journey to write to Alessia, letting her know that you have well arrived.
“Jana is maybe not home for now, but she gave us the key for her flat. Do you want to come to ours to wait though?” Ona asks, turning in your direction.
“Nah, don’t worry” you answer, looking up from your phone. “Like this I will be able to take a shower. I will see you both tonight though, right?”
“Of course.”
Jana makes a happy squeak when she sees you sitting on her couch, your clothes changed to support Barcelona’s heath. You laugh at her but hug her back anyway, really happy to see her in real again.
“I missed you so much! Look at you, how are you so white?” she smirks, pinching your cheek.
“Meh, and how are you still so small?”
You have texted with Alessia before Jana’s return, so you are able to talk to the girl non-stop for hours without any interruption. Jana made you diner that you eat with a Sangria, catching up the news that you missed from your phone calls. It’s only at the end of the meal that your friend asks you a question that you weren’t waiting anymore.
“So. Who is making you this happy?”
You are happy to have already finish your dish, because you probably would have chock on your food. You never talked about your feelings for Alessia to anyone, only to Caitlin. You don’t know that you are very obvious for your other teammates.
“What are you talking about?”
“You look very happy. I haven’t seen you so happy for months. So, who it is?”
You look at your friend, not knowing what to say. You haven’t talk with Alessia about the finality of your relationship, you haven’t labelled it either. You don’t know if she will be ok for you to talk about it. After what happened in her apartment that night, you talked with Alessia the morning after. You were relieved to learn that she didn’t change her mind and she still wanted more than a (wonderful) night together.
You haven’t sleep separately since that day, until you have to leave for Barcelona. Alessia took you to the airport like she said, kissing you goodbye.
“Come on, talk to me” Jana add, hitting your feet with hers. “Is it someone I know?”
“I don’t think so” you bite your lip. “Unless you already met Alessia Russo?”
“No way! I thought she was straight!”
You laugh, unable to resist to the surprise and the amazement on Jana’s face. You know that you won’t be able to skip the questions from your friend now and you really hope that Alessia won’t be mad at you about it. You make Jana promise that she won’t say anything to anyone.
You take advantage of Jana taking a shower to call the blonde back in London. You don’t know if she’s already at the team bonding, but after texting her to know if you can call her, she did it herself.
“Hello” says Alessia’s voice and you can’t help but smile.
“Hi Beautiful” you smile softly, happy to hear her. “Am I disturbing you?”
“You never disturbed me before; it won’t start now. I’m waiting for Leah to take me to Kyra’s, my favorite driver failed me.”
Alessia is teasing you, you can say it only with her voice.
“I’ll make it up to you” you promise, still smiling.
“You better. I miss you.”
“I miss you too. Do you have time to talk about something?”
“Of course?”
You try to be as concise as possible, putting the most important point of the conversation in the middle; you talked to Jana about you two. With Alessia not in front of you, you aren’t able to read her facial expressions and it’s worry you. What if it’s too soon? Would it be something that could make her back up?
Without realizing it, you start to talk maybe a little too fast, you are way to anxious for your own good.
“You talked about us to Jana?” Alessia summarizes after your rumbling.
“Yeah” you breath.
“That’s all?”
“Yeah?”
“Why am I feeling that you are waiting for me to be mad at you? Jana is one of your best friend, right?”
“I don’t know, it’s still the early hours of whatever is existing between us, and I don’t want to pressure you or something.”
You can hear that Alessia is confused, but you are yourself confuse about her confusion.
“But I thought that we were on the same page, that we are serious with each other?”
“I am, Lessi. I am very serious about us. So, you aren’t mad?”
“Of course not, you have the right to talk about us to your friends. Don’t torture yourself like this Sweetheart. Look Leah is here since several minutes already, I really have to go. Keep me update about your night?”
“I will. I’m waiting for your messages too” you smile softly, your heart jumping at the cute surname. “I can’t wait to see you again.”
“Me too”
You can hear Alessia’s smile in her voice when she sends you a kiss, wishing you a good night. You feel better now that you heard Alessia’s voice and now that you are sure about what you’ve done.
It’s with a light heart that you enter the bar privatized for the party by the Putellas, to see that a lot of people are already here.
“Here she is!” Cata shouts when she jumps on your back before kissing your cheek with a useless noise.
Then Salma pinches your cheek, Marta ruffles your hair, Mapi jumps excitably next to you and Patri slaps you behind your head. You missed them. You managed to get out of the grip of your former teammates to go see Alexia, who hug you tightly. You smile at Olga behind Alexia’s shoulder, before she releases you to take your face in her hands and looks at you with seriousness.
“You need a tan.”
“Oh, come one” you groan “I live in London, what were you all expected? It’s a miracle that you can’t actually see through my skin.”
Some of your friends around you laugh and Alexia gives you one of her big smiles in return.
“Well, you need to come here this summer in that case.”
“It works for me” you smirk.
Alexia seems happy with your answer and drag you to the bar for you to chose something to drink. You take the opportunity to catch up with a lot of your friends, talking in front of them is definitely better than messaging.
The night went great, you have a lot of fun with all of them. Mapi even managed to drag you on the dance floor at some point for several songs, before you go to get another drink. You find here Ingrid and Frido and start to talk with them, before being find by Jana.
You had a lot of notifications on your phone, your friends posting different stories on Instagram, marking you in the one you are. But you just check Alessia’s messages to be honest.
You were laughing about a story Jana was telling when you spot her. Jennifer Hermoso is here, and you feel all the blood in your face being drained. You never thought that she will be present, no one informed you. You would probably never come if you knew.
When you turn to Jana, she’s looking at you with wide eyes.
“Jana…”
“I didn’t know she would come Y/N, I swear!”
You just have to look at her to know that she’s saying the truth. But Jenni is still here, and you haven’t seen her since your breakup. The breakup who came three months after you saw her for the last time.
“Do you want to leave?”
Jana offers you a way out and you are really tempted to use it. But in another hand, you were having fun, it’s Alexia birthday and you have the right to be here. You wonder if Jenni knows that you are here.
“No, I…”
You start to talk, before remembering that pictures are posted on social media, and you are scared that Alessia sees a picture of Jenni before you inform her that she’s here. But wouldn’t be more suspect if you write her just several seconds after having spotted her?
“Should I tell Lessi?” you whisper to Jana.
She looks at you thoughtfully, but there is soon a blond tornado grabbing you by your arms. Alexia seems terrified when she looks at you.
“Y/N, Jenni is here, I’m sorry. She wanted to surprise me, Alba just mentioned to her the date of the party and she wanted to make a surprise.”
“It’s ok Ale” you assure her, managing to smile at her. “I promised I won’t make a scene.”
“That’s not what scare me, idiota.”
“I’ll ignore and avoid her. The bar is big enough.”
“She’s here with her girlfriend.”
“Still” you say after a beam of silence. “It’s ok Ale, keep enjoying your night ok?”
Her hazel eyes look at you for a small time before she nods slowly. You always find her way to look at people strange but fascinating. Like she can scan your mind and your soul.
“You’ll need to talk to me about your new girlfriend, though. But maybe not now.”
“Maybe not now” you say back, unable to hide your smile.
Alexia leaves after that and you finish your drink to keep your hands busy. The three other girls started to talk again about a random thing that you aren’t able to really follow at first. They don’t seem to realize it, or they just let you the time to adapt to the new situation.
Soon after, you have a great distraction because Alexia’s cake is coming and you can only laugh when you see that it’s decorated with childish Barcelona goodies.
Jenni is tall and it’s hard to miss her in a crowd. You easily spot the girl who is with her and it seems to you that she’s not the one she cheated on you with. But maybe you shouldn’t look at them. Lucy and Ona offer you a good entertainment when they come to you, Lucy grumpily complaining about a waitress trying to hit on Ona. The Spaniard rolls her eyes during Lucy’s explanations, but still sticks against Lucy who passed a possessive arm around her waist.
It makes you miss Alessia.
You were touchy before your first kiss; you always find comfort with her touch.
So, you excuse yourself to go outside to try to call Alessia. You hope that she won’t think that you are too invasive and that thought made you hesitate several seconds when you are outside, your phone’s screen on her ID.
“I was wondering if I will see you in person today.”
You recognize the voice way before raising your eyes on her. Jenni is against the wall of the club, two meters away from you, a cigarette in her hand.
“I wasn’t expecting you to be here” you answer.
She looks at you several seconds before shrugging and putting her cigarette on the trash next to her. You take advantage of that gesture to have a real look at her. She hasn’t changed, but you realize with a big relief that you don’t feel any attraction to her.
“I wanted to surprise Alexia. I didn’t know I will surprise you either. I hope it’s ok that I am here.”
“It’s not my birthday, I don’t have anything to say” you answer honestly.
“If you haven’t blocked me everywhere, I would have told you”
You are surprised by that statement and raise both of your eyebrow while looking at her.
“Do I really need to remember you why I blocked you?”
You have been using a neutral voice until now, but you suddenly find her way to cocky and at ease with her behavior. She seems surprised at her turn by the tone of your voice.
“No” she only answer.
You wanted to call Alessia but if that’s mean that you have to be near Jenni, you rather go inside. But when you turn to go inside, you hear her coming closer to you.
“Wait, can we at least talk?”
You sigh softly before turning in her direction again. It’s weird to be faced with her, to be honest. And you don’t really like it. But maybe you have to pass that moment to get over what happened and the different questions you have about it.
“What do you want to talk about?” you ask, crossing your arms on your chest.
“What happened. I never said that I’m sorry that it finished like that. And I’m sorry that you needed to leave Barcelona after.”
You didn’t expect any excuse, to be honest. You always loved Jenni’s cocky side, her humor and her strength of character. You always have been admirative about the way she stands with her convictions.
“It seems like we weren’t meant to be” you finally answer, shrugging slightly. “But the betrayal was the worst thing ever. That’s what destroyed me, Jenni. I trusted you and you just put two years in the trash like it never meant anything to you. That was hard.”
It’s not usual to see Jenni without knowing what to answer, but for now she’s just standing in front of you with all of her charism, but oh so different from Alessia. They are both tall but except than that, they are in nothing similar. Alessia is the sweetness personified where Jenni is cocky. Alessia has the bluest eyes you have ever seen where Jenni’s are deep brown. Alessia has blond hair, Jenni has brown.
“I’m sorry” Jenni says again.
“Forget it. Where’s your girlfriend? She’s not the one you were dating while we were supposed to still be together, is she?”
Jenni seems uneasy suddenly, dancing on her heels.
“No. I stopped things with her, she kept remembering me how bad I was with you. When we broke up, no one wanted to talk about you to me. I knew like this how much you were hurt and then I learned that you left Barcelona for London.”
You are surprised by that, to be honest. You always thought that Jenni was living her best life with her new girlfriend, completely ignoring the pain she did to you. You were wrong, but you are grateful for you friends and the way they protected you. You stay silence and Jenni takes the opportunity to come closer to you, raising her hand probably in attempt to touch your face.
“Don’t” you say, stepping back a few steps.
“I wanted to see if you thought that we will be able to start to talk again, but I think I can guess the answer already.”
“You knew I would be here” you frown.
Jenni bites her lip and shrugs. She doesn’t have to answer anything, you already know the answer. In fact, you weren’t asking a question, it was more a statement from you.
“You met someone, right?”
“It’s none of your business, Jenni. I’m sorry.”
Not after everything she made you live. Alessia is your treasure, and you don’t want Jenni to smear it. You turn your heels to go back inside. You haven’t call Alessia and you hope that no one saw the encounter you just had with Jenni, at least before you call the blonde.
But when you saw a photograph going inside just before you, you start to panic. Hands shaking, you grab your phone and manage to find a quiet place somewhere to call Alessia.
When she doesn’t answer, you start to really panic. If you look at the picture from another point of view, you are probably over-reacting. People would thought that you are too attached to Alessia and that you are kind of toxic. But they can’t understand how much Alessia means to you.
“Y/N?”
You raise your head to look at Jana, who is looking back at you with worry.
“She doesn’t answer” you mumble.
“Have you talked to Jenni? I saw her coming inside just after you.”
“Yeah. She said that she was sorry or whatever… Will you be mad if I go home now?”
“I’m coming with you.”
Jana seems decided about her decision, but there is no way that you let her make her night awful because of you.
“Don’t be stupid. It’s Alexia’s birthday, you can’t go home now.”
“You, don’t be stupid. Come on.”
She takes your hand and drags you in the crowd, you want to at least say goodbye to Alexia. You find her easily, talking with some of her friends. You don’t have to explain anything to her, she hugs you as tightly as earlier and you hug her back.
“Take care of you, yeah? And warn your girlfriend that she will have to deal with me if she does shit with you.”
“I’ll tell her” you smile softly.
If she answers your calls at one point.
But you don’t say anything to Alexia for now, it’s her birthday. You want her to have a perfect night and to remember this with happiness. You had a great time yourself, until Jenni made her appearance.
During your trip to Jana’s flat, you tried to call Alessia twice, but she still doesn’t answer. You don’t really understand why, because you looked at the stories and posts you were tag in and there is nothing with Jenni and you. There definitively are pictures of Jenni though and you saw several fans becoming crazy, wondering if it means that you are back together.
You thought about calling Leah or Caitlin, but you don’t want to put other people in this mess.
You are the mess anyway, when you arrive in Jana’s, you just lie on the bed in her guestroom, looking at your phone, waiting for it to have Alessia ID appearing on the screen. You don’t understand why she doesn’t answer, even if you are watching a movie during team bonding, she has a phone in her hand.
You have a little bit of hope every time you see your phone light up, but It’s never Alessia. Jana felt asleep since a long time already when you feel your eyes being heavy. But you are scared and you are not able to fall asleep.
You lost hope to hear Alessia’s voice when the screen shine one more time. But this time it’s Alessia’s picture and you jump on your phone to answer.
“Hello?” you say, your heart beating somewhere close to your lips.
“Hi Baby” Alessia whispers. “I’m sorry, I fall asleep while looking at the movie.”
“Oh.”
Finally, you probably were overreacting. But you are relieved and that’s the most important thing for you now. Jana groans next to you before rolling on the bed to hide her face under the pillow, making you roll your eyes. To prevent any fight, you get up to get out of the room.
“Yeah. I’ll never trusted Kyra’s choice ever again.”
“Are you having a good night though?”
“I am. But everyone is asleep or going home now. I usually don’t fall asleep because I’m fighting against it to enjoy the fact that I’m with you, but I have no reason to do it today.”
She’s talking a lot, like always, but you are so glad about that. Her voice helps you to settle your nerves a little, but she easily catches that something is wrong.
“Where are you? It’s quiet around you, I thought that Spanish people were party animal?”
“Oh, they are” you answer, thinking about Jana dead asleep in the room.
“Is everything ok?”
You don’t know what to answer at that, so the next seconds are silent, and it can be stressing for Alessia maybe.
“Y/N?”
“She is here. In Barcelona. She came to Alexia’s party.”
You don’t have to name her, Alessia probably understands who you are talking about just like this. You hear her take a breath and you bite your lip hard.
“I- We talked but there was nothing more than talking, Lessi I swear. And I didn’t want to talk to her at first, but I went outside to call you and she was there all alone. I even didn’t saw her at first, but then she started to talk to me and –“
“Y/N!”
You can hear in Alessia’s voice that it’s not the first time that she tried to get your attention by calling your name. But you suddenly shut up, breathing quickly.
“Can you take a deep breath and please sit on something?”
You don’t ask how she knows that you are walking around Jana’s living room, but you listen to her and sit on the couch.
“I didn’t know she would be here” you mumble shyly.
“I guessed, I know that you would have told me if you knew. Why are you so tensed? What happened?”
What happened? Well almost nothing, now that you have her on the phone speaking to you. How can you tell her that you were stressing for nothing? You don’t want to look crazier than you are to Alessia. Sighting softly, you press your index and your thumb in your eyes.
“Y/N?”
Alessia’s voice is worried now and that the last thing you want her to be. Worried because of you.
“Nothing. It’s just… I got scared that you’ll see pictures of me and her before I talked to you about it.”
“About what?”
“Her being here” you shrug. “Like I told you, I found myself facing her without wanting it. And you know how social media work.”
There is a beam of silence, and you look at your screen to be sure that Alessia is still here.
“What have you talked about?”
“We talked about the breakup; she told me that my friends make a great work for her not being able to talk to me again after it. She said that she’s sorry for hurting me and that she’s not anymore with the girl she cheated on me with” you answer, searching in your mind if you forgot something.
Alessia snorts.
“Why in the world would she break a relationship with you with another woman to stop dating her right after?”
“She said that she remembered her how bad she treated me” you shrug. “And she said she wanted to us to start again.”
“Is it something you want?”
You regret not to have turn this call in a FaceTime earlier, Alessia’s tone is very plate, and it would have been easier to understand her feelings if you were able to have a look at her. You don’t hesitate before answering at that question though.
“No. I’m definitely over her, even if I think I still have repercussions from her behavior. But I’m not interested”
“Good”
You hear a sigh of relief, and you smile softly. Your feelings for Alessia scare you, but you know that you won’t find a more comprehensive and sweeter person in the world. You don’t know if she’s the one (you hope she is) but right now you don’t think that you could ever find someone better than Alessia Is for you.
“Can we switch on video call?” you ask shyly.
Alessia accepted easily and you are happy to see her pretty face again. She’s lying in a bed, on her stomach and everything is dark around her. She show you the room that you recognized like one of Kyra’s spare room.
“Thank you for telling me everything. It might have been hard to face her.”
“It was. But it answered some of the questions I had”
“Which ones?”
You see Alessia tilts her head and can’t help but smile at the cuteness of the girl.
“She doesn’t really explain why she cheated, but I think I understood that it wasn’t really my fault. And I learned that she actually felt bad about it, it’s probably selfish but I was happy to hear that.”
“Cheating is selfish. Wanting to feel better after being cheated on isn’t.”
Alessia’s looking at you with frown eyebrows. You know that she’s mad to Jenni about the cheating, other than that she never really met your ex-girlfriend. You’re not sure that they would get along very well anyway.
“And when she asks me if we could start to talk again and try to touch my face I – “
“I beg you pardon?”
Oh, right. You didn’t mention the almost touching part, but you only forgot. Judging by Alessia’s reaction, it seems pretty important for her. Her face is perfectly neutral, but you can see fire in her eyes.
“She tried to touch you?”
“Well, my face or my hair I don’t know. I didn’t let her though.”
Alessia just snorts in answer. She seems to be disturbed by the gesture more than all the conversation, even if Jenni said that she wanted for you to talk again. You stay silent after that, not really knowing what to add or to say.
“Are you ok? I’m sorry if it’s too much” you finally say after several time.
“Yeah. I just don’t like the idea of someone wanting to touch my- what’s-… Well, you know. You.”
You hum for only answer, looking at the blonde’s soft face. There is a light pink covering her cheeks, but you decide not to tease her about it.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course” Alessia answer, trying to hide a yawn.
“Do you think that what we have is like, too much?”
“Too much what?” the blonde asks, tilting her head on the side again.
“I don’t know. Too intense, too fast?”
“No” she smiles. “I’ve waited for weeks before kissing you.”
“Yes but… We kissed for the first time only five days ago and now everything we just talked about is happening?”
“Stop me if I’m wrong but you haven’t only kissed, actually.”
“Alessia.” you answer, blushing at your turn now.
“I think I prefer when you call me Lessi” she smirks before giggling when she sees you rolling your eyes. “No to answer seriously, I don’t think it’s too much. We have our proper history and way to do things, but like every couple in the world.”
You nod softly, putting your feet on the table in front of you. You hate the way that you are not able to be sure about her statement entirely. But you don’t want to say it and take the risk to hurt her, she already has been way too understanding with you since the beginning.
“Hey” she says softly to attract your attention again. “I’m very happy with how we are doing things. And if something will bother me at some point, I’ll talk to you about it, ok?”
“Ok” you mumble back with a soft smile. “I’m sorry to be like this.”
“You don’t have to. Someone broke your trust at some point, it’s normal for you to need reassurances. I knew about it when I started to pass time with you, when we kiss and everything. I knew it was a part of you and if you let me, I will make everything for you to trust me with everything you have. And I will take care of you like you deserve it.”
The amount of love you have for this woman. You don’t know how you could translate it, to be honest. If she was next to you it would have been easier, you only would have kiss her with all the feelings you have for her.
“You’re going to make my heart explode” you can only say, really emotional about her declaration.
“Mmh we don’t want that, do we?”
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You passed the next morning with Jana, Ona, Lucy and Bruna, eating a brunch on the beach. You even went into the water, even if it’s only February. It made Lucy laughs, only until Narla follows you and didn’t want to get out of the water after. Lucy had to go herself to take her out and you were the one laughing.
(Ona threatened you to send her to London if she gets sick because of it, not wanting to deal with an ill Lucy. Which you know are deep lies.)
In the afternoon, you said goodbye to Jana and the others to have quality time with Alexia. You explain to her what happened with Alessia those last days and then what happened with Jenni yesterday. She doesn’t seem surprised but she sights nevertheless. Ale explains to you that Jenni asked her several times to talk to you for her, which Alexia refused every time.
She doesn’t say that Jenni used that birthday like an excuse to be able to talk to you, but you understand it. It doesn’t make sense for you that she might have that idea and still came with her girlfriend. Alexia didn’t had any explanation, so you rather talk about something else. You teased Alexia a little about her relationship with Olga, but she gets her revenge while asking you thousands of questions about you and Alessia.
Ale’ drove you to the airport and you exchanged a hug, promising each other that you won’t let pass so much time until you saw each other again. Seems like it would be in Barcelona, because you weren’t able to convince La Reina to come in England.
You left Barcelona with your heart full of love and your suitcases full of Sangria and ham for Kyra. You slept during the trip, and you are a little lost when you arrived at London. You managed to convince Alessia to go to sleep and only come to see you tomorrow morning with the breakfast, you have training around ten, and you don’t want her to be tired because of you. So, you don’t expect anyone waiting for you.
You are in auto mode while walking to grab a taxi and go home as soon as possible. You can’t wait to take a shower and fall back asleep again. You jump out of your skin when you feel a hand grabbing your arm, even if it was very softly.
“Wha…”
You turn yourself to be facing a smirking Alessia and your mind get blank for several seconds.
“Lessi?”
“Hi” she says before kissing your cheek and hugging you.
You pass your arms around her, still a little in chock. You hadn’t expected her here, you thought that she will be at home, peacefully asleep.
“Weren’t you supposed to be in your bed right now?” you whisper during the hug.
“I just couldn’t wait to see you.”
You smile and hug her even harder. It feels like you haven’t seen her for two weeks, but it was only two days. It shows how much time you are passing together. You breath her sent with pleasure and miss her arms around you as soon as she lets you go.
“Come on, let’s go to my car so I can kiss you properly” she suddenly says, dragging you by your arm.
You laugh when you follow her, but the kisses you received after were worth it. You thought that the period where you were kissing in a car were definitively behind you, but it seems like Alessia has other ideas.
After one hour in her car, you are finally home. You abandoned Alessia the time to go to take a shower but find her in her pajama when you are crawling in your bed. You snuggle up against her, happy to have her with you even if she didn’t listen to you.
“I think that Leah and Caitlin are suspecting something about us” Alessia whispers after some minutes.
“Mh. I might have talked to Caitlin about my feelings for you before something happened” you mumble, blushing slightly.
“Oh. Made sense”
“I don’t know about Leah though” you yawn, burying your face in her neck.
“She’s just very observant I think.”
You hum, letting your body relax against Alessia’s. Your eyes are heavy, but you can see that Alessia seems pretty awake, and you want to have more minutes with her.
“I have a confession to make” Alessia says.
You take your face away of her neck to be able to have a better look at her. She doesn’t have a guilty look on her face but seems more uneasy. You feel your heartbeat getting faster, scared to learn a bad new.
“Okay?” you just answer.
“When I learned that you were going back to Barcelona. I got scared”
You are frowning now, not understanding where she wants to go. You put your head on your hand to look at her, putting your other hand on her stomach. Alessia is laying on her back, but her face is turned in your direction.
“Why?”
“I was scared that you decide to stay in Barcelona. I know you miss your friends from here and the city. That’s what was in my mind when we came back from the training ground and a big party of the night. There were all the signals you were showing me but in another hand I know that you were hurt about your past and I didn’t want to press you about anything. Maybe I don’t know how much you are hurt, but I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. But then I kept thinking that maybe you wouldn’t come back, and I decided to take my chance.”
“I’m so glad you did” you smile, stroking softly her face. “I would have come back though.”
“Yeah?”
“Uh uh” you whisper before leaning on her and kissing her tenderly. “I miss Barcelona and the girls, but I missed you very much too.”
You feel her smile under your lips, and she passes her arms around you to hug you. You already explained to her your discussions with your friends back in Barcelona in her car, so you are just able to enjoy her presence against you.
It didn’t last long though; you are falling asleep only two minutes after, protected by your lover’s arms. You smile in your sleep when she kisses your head softly. You feel safe, cared and loved, even if these words have not yet been said. It won’t take long though.
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threeacttragedy · 11 days ago
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Entry 1 - The One About That Weird Ass Cressida Post
This is my first blog entry and, before you start reading, let me just drop in this little disclaimer: 
You will find that I bounce between fact and speculation with a mix of sarcasm and [I hope] level-headedness, common sense, and deductive reasoning.
I am a Lukola. Plain and simple. You will not change my mind. It’s an all or nothing thing for me. How I got here, I’m not exactly sure – wait, no I do know how I got here (thank you Nicola and Luke for being so fucking charming).
Of course, I knew what Bridgerton was before I joined the Lukola fandom. In fact, I watched both Seasons 1 and 2, and they were okay. Yes, just okay.
I knew that Season 3 was about Penelope – the only character I found remotely interesting – so when I saw an article on People’s page showing Nicola and her costar holdings hands, I admit I was intrigued.
Were they dating?
Let’s ask Mr. Google and find out.
No, apparently, they were not.
Okay, fine.
I then made the mistake of clicking on a video of Nicola and Luke being interviewed in Australia. And, motherfuck, they were like lightning in a bottle! Luke – being asked if he believed in friends to lovers – responded in a way that left me feeling a bit blindsided. My immediate thought was: “He fell in love with Nicola the moment he met her.” It’s funny how many people I’ve spoken to since who had an identical reaction and, to be honest, Luke’s response won’t make your heart flutter. But, it was something in the way he said it.
Now, let me explain my feelings about love at first sight. Actually, Nicola explained it best when she said lust at first sight is often mistaken for love at first sight. This, I agree with wholeheartedly. To me, love at first sight does not have to be lusty. It can be, sure, but it can also be something entirely different. Maybe it’s a fleeting feeling of recognizing someone in a way you cannot possibly articulate out loud. Maybe it’s a palpitation of your heartbeat. Maybe it feels like home. Regardless, when you experience it, you’ll know it.
That, my friends, is how I got here, and why I [sometimes begrudgingly] stay here – walking alongside this rather long, winding, and often pothole-filled road waiting for two people to admit to the general public – whether it be in a blatant or subtle manner – that they are, in fact, together.
I’ve noticed in this fandom we seem to have three types of people.  We have the Sincerely Ignorant, the Conscientiously Stupid, and the Fact Finders.
The Sincerely Ignorant are those that are easily persuaded. They are like sheep following their shepherd. In fact, the Sincerely Ignorant are the most dangerous as they tend to spiral hard and fast – and often without reason.
Next, we have the Conscientiously Stupid. These are the shippers that choose to live in error because it fits their narrative. We are all a bit Conscientiously Stupid but there are those that push an idea so hard that they omit certain truths from their storyboard. The danger here is obvious and their victims always include the Sincerely Ignorant.
Lastly, we have the Fact Finders. The people who track information – key players, side characters, dates, places, statements, etc. These are the people who often find themselves pulling the Sincerely Ignorant out of the water when they spiral, usually due to narratives being pushed by the Conscientiously Stupid.
I am a Fact Finder. Am I perfect? Fuck no, but I do find it fun to collect and analyze information and share it with my fellow Fact Finders. Plus, collecting data helps me maintain some indifference towards the USS Lukola because, let’s face it, this god-damned ship has been blasted by quite a few cannonballs at this point. Some days, I’m surprised we’re still afloat.
Let’s start with Cannonball No. 1. Pap-fucking-smear. June 12/13, 2024. What a fucking shit show. Who shows up to the London premiere? Antonia, Luke’s – I honestly don’t even know what word to use here because I have a lot of different thoughts but out of [a small amount of] respect I will call her – “girl friend” [yes, that space was intentional]. We all know the story, Luke was papped outside his hotel with Antonia on premiere night and he was pegged an overnight dumpster fire.
And, oh my God, the Sincerely Ignorant and Conscientiously Stupid ran with it. I mean, they practically became wild dogs chasing down a fox under the command of Nicola the Huntsman. However, Nicola, almost immediately, came to Luke’s rescue by posting an “in support of” style story to her IG. I’m not saying Nicola wasn’t affected by this mishap. At the very least, the post-premiere PR efforts were dumped squarely on her tiny shoulders. At the worst, she’d had her heart broken.
I never liked the Papsmear pictures. Not because I disliked what they depicted but because there was something “off” about them. Luke didn’t look like a man happy to be out with his lady friend. He looked like a man who had been hoodwinked and whether that was because he knew he’d just made a major PR misstep or because he knew the narrative that would follow was false doesn’t really matter because it’s all speculative. But, what makes me believe it was the latter is what Luke did next.
On June 15, Luke put a story on his IG promoting Season 3. That isn’t all that interesting but the scene it depicted made me do a double take.
Could it be?
No…no way…
But…it was.
It was the scene in Ep. 6 where Cressida entered the Mondrich Ball and Colin pulled Penelope aside and told her he wouldn’t let Cressida ruin their evening.
What in the hot fuck? I mean, really, what in the hot fuck??
Did Luke really just blast out an IG story where his character tells Nicola’s character not to let the Cressida character ruin their evening? Was Cressida…Antonia?
Because that’s fucking loud.
I mean, of all the scenes over four episodes, Luke chose THAT one to promote Pt. 2?
Surely, Antonia or one of her friends or family members would have picked up on this, right? And, told Antonia.
No one is going to convince me that Luke and Antonia were in a blissful relationship after that IG story was posted. Why? Because the deductive reasoning part of my brain tells me Luke chose Nicola straight outta Pap-gate.
The Conscientiously Stupid may [rather they WILL] argue that it was just for PR. Okay, but that would mean Antonia accepted the comparison between Cressida, the Evening-Ruiner, and herself. Take a moment and put yourself in Antonia’s shoes. Would you accept this from your partner? (P.S. If you said yes, you have bigger problems in life than following real people’s relationships.)  We know Antonia accepted this role to some extent because we have evidence she attended events with Luke over the summer. So, what the fuck?
In my opinion, Luke’s IG story is a defining moment in the Lukola narrative, but one that was overlooked in June and one that continues to be overlooked – and ignored – now.
Luke’s character is telling Nicola’s character he won’t let another woman ruin their evening.
Let me repeat that again for you:  Luke’s character is telling Nicola’s character he won’t let another woman ruin their evening.
Now wrap your head around that.
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mehiwilldoitlater · 2 months ago
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*crawls onto desk and looks up upon you* oh dear and glorious author god who graciously feeds us by humble request,I have arrived once more to give asking for blessings of feed for my brethen and I. Please gib the jealous scenario. It is finally time to gib us. The jealous monke. Please and thank you.
((my beloved, i take as this request as a joyfull presents. I NEED MORE! PEOPLE I NEED MORE!))
"Well, it looks like you're getting quite good at it, huh?"
Turning around, you noticed Shen coming closer from his spot. You took the chance of a small chat with the forefather to get a small break from your training with your new-found powers. Being able to use some of the same skills that Yuán Fèn had was handy, but he was such a natural with them while you needed to focus a little more. Of course, your friend decided to help you out with them. That's why you both decided to head to the Zodiac Village to not gain attention. Of course the two of you were under the wathfull eyes of Bajie, sitting on a giant case near the furnace.
And of Shen, of course, but he had a strange glim in his eyes that day.
" Yes! Is exciting! I never imagined that even I could do such things as these!"
"You're a Natural One, y/n! We still need to fix a few mistakes, but you're on the right path!"
Yuán Fèn has nothing but pure pleasure; seeing you so excited makes his heart slip a bit a few times. And of course, many had noticed, and someone wanted to use another approach with you two.
"Is that so? Well, good to know, good to know... Since she's a natural with these staff, do you mind if I take your little friend here for a few tests? I should really need a palate like hers now."
Shen put his arm around your shoulder, poking your nose, glancing a few. Look to the other one. His tone, usually so relaxed and aloof, was strangely sweet to the younger monkey ears that time. To be honest, it felt less genuine and a little more suave. 
"I...ehm...yes, why not? If y/n is fine by that."
"Well...okay! I needed a break!
"Good! Now follow me, dearest."
After that nickname, that gesture, and another side glance from the forefather, Yuán Fèn felt itchy, his foot tapping the ground light, and his tail wiggling in a strange behavior.
///
From there on, you cannot shake away the feeling that Shen was onto something. 
He was closer, very closer than usual, to you while he let you taste a few of the wines that he was able to produce, and he kept letting you use the sober stone to avoid any kind of surprise. He wanted you vigilant, that's what he said.
He was funny; he had always had this easygoing behavior, but this time he had never let a chance slide for making you laugh or making some compliments that led you to a blushfull state.
And while he was acting in this behavior, as trying to show you around, someone seemed to be in an agitated state. From time to time, when you heard movements or something being touched by a foot, you were able to see a certain destiny around, looking at the two of you. You tried to call for him, trying to ask him if he was okay or if he needed something, but Shen was always ready to take away the words from your mouth and question the other male.
Yuán Fèn, with some scoff, just avoid the questions.
You were trying another wine when you felt Shen's hand on your shoulder.
"But enough of it; tell me, Y/n, do you have a special one?" You almost choke on the wine.
"M-me?"
"Of course you! Someone that caught your eye? Someone that let your heart skip a beat?"
You tapped the cap a few times, your eyes avoiding to meet Yuán Fèn and confirm something.
"Wel... I don't think. No..."
"Oh! So you basically free now, uh?" Why was he so close? You get so small between his hands. "In this case...why don't we-"
And in one swift second, two other hands grabbed you, taking you away from Shen's attention. A tail was wrapping around you like a cobra, and a shadow loomed over you, covering you from everything.
Yuán Fèn, with his teeth grinding, was looking at Shen with a pair of eyes that could set fire to a forest.
"HANDS OF OR-" as he had taken that stance, he suddenly stopped, one hand leaving you to cover in teeth in shame.
"Or...what?" Shen had that smirk again, unmoved by that show.
Yuán Fèn lowered his eyes on you; his shameful eyes met your incredulous ones. As he had come, he darted off, mumbling something for himself. You stood up, looking at him with a worried expression.
"Yuán Fèn! Wait! I'm so sorry, Shen! I'll go talk with him!"
You followed the Destined One, while Shen waved his hand with a sneaky eye.
///////
You were able to reach it only when the same monkey stopped in his tracks. You had called him a few times. but it seemed that he didn't quite register you at all.
"Yuán Fèn! Wjat happened! Why did you act like that?!" You looked at him with concern.
He had never reacted with someone like that, especially with you as an audience! When he turned around, his face was covered in a pure red shade, making him look more like a fire bell than anything.
"I don't know what happened to me! He-he was just...and you were...and I started to... I'm so sorry! I shouldn't act like that to the forefather!"
"Wait, wait, wait..." you take his hands in your "breath, then speak."
He did what you asked; he needed more minutes to completely calm himself.
"I'm so sorry that you have to witness that shameful display. I felt something bad from the moment he took you to testing those wines. I know he was planning something, but I didn't know what. And these things, this emotion—I felt this itching sensation that I needed to take you away from him!"
He seemed genuinely hurt, so you guessed that he acted as an idiot. After all,. he may be the destined one, but he was a monkey too. And, by the way, he was explaining it...
"Were you jealous?"
By hearing these three words, his expression of shame became one of pain. Like the idea of having such feelings made him sick of some sort.
"It's horrible; I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it!"
"Calm down," you giggled. " Is...fine! ...Flattering even."
"Flattering? How?" He looked at you, now confused by that statement.
"Well," you continued, "no one ever had jealousy as me as the motive. It's a new thing and a tiny tipsy cute."
"How can that be cute?!"
"Well, just a little! It's showing that you care, but just a bit! I'm not someone; I want to see you fight over people!"
At least you took it in the most rational way. He massaged his eyes, sighing deeply.
"I'm still sorry...in front of the forefather, a deity even!"
"Let's go and apologize. Besides, he was acting off, and I felt a little...hoverwelmed by him. As long as we make our piece, I think we're even." Your warm smile gave him a little more of a relax; at least you weren't angry. If it was necessary, he would have talked to the other zodiacs too; for now, he let you take his hand and guided him towards the village.
/////////
"You old monkey, have you no shame?!" Bajie could give a damn to the fact that the monkey was come kind of deity; he was ready to hit him with his rake. Shen just kept drinking with a very satisfied face.
"Brother,"Chen stepped in. "He's right! Poor girl, you must have scared her for life! And that poor boy, have you no shame to embarrass your youngling like that?!"
"Easy, my friends, easy! Look!" His finger pointed to the figure of you two, talking to each other and...holding hands. You were smiling, reassuring him. He was calming down, cinfessing something. " See? They just needed a small push."
"That's not even a real confession if you ask me," retorted Bajie.
"You may be right, brother pig, but if we don't set the base, we'll never have a house!"
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tobyfier · 8 months ago
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The Mailman
Ah yes, the mailman. The new resident in the apartment, the complete opposite of milkman, aka Francis Mosses. How does Francis feel about the new person in the apartment? Will he hate him or not? Continue reading to find out!
;Male Reader
(P.s English is not my first language, feel free to correct my mistakes!This is also written from Francis’ pov)
ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★ ᯓ★
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I didn’t exactly know how to feel about the new resident of the apartment, however I did know his name. M/n L/n was it? Yes, I thinks so. He was..energetic to say the least, quite the surprise considering the current situation about doppelgängers. The other residents didn’t seem to mind his personality, in fact they all seem to like him a lot..If I had to be honest I envy him.
I mean who wouldn’t? He’s nice,energetic,approachable,and pretty charming. Not to mention he seems to enjoy his job as a mailman, while I’m stuck here being the boring milkman. Nobody really approaches me, saying I look intimidating and not much of a social guy..rude but technically yeah, I could care less about socializing and I only want to finish my job for the day so that I could go home, I never really had much of an interest for romance or socializing with other people. But he seems to be the complete opposite, whenever we was by each other he would always flash me a smile and greet me. I never really say hi back but he doesn’t seem to mind that at all. And whenever he delivers a message or package he would always make small talks with the person, whether it be how their day was or how the weather looks nice. Sometimes I wonder how someone can be so sociable with others.
One time he started talking to me ranting something about space and how he likes stars, he wouldn’t stop ranting. And so I told him to stop talking and left..the next day I was doing my usual job as a milkman, delivering milk to people who ordered when I saw him going house to house delivering a mail or a package. And when we went pass each other, I expected him to ignore me considering I rudely left him on the street yesterday. But he greeted me morning as usual..he’s such a strange and unpredictable man.
Few weeks later..
“Hm..” I hummed as I press the doorbell of the house, I put the bottle of milk down and continued walking to the next house. I could already hear the person talk about how much of a loner I am, just like the other houses..ugh I just want this deliveries to get done fast so I can go home and lay down on my bed..Ah there he is again with his upbeat personality, as usual. How can someone talk so much, if I ever tried that I would be tired before I can even manage to say a paragraph. What if I try to greet him back this time, would be nice if I change my pace a bit, right?
“Morning Mr. Mosses, nice to see you again once more!” He greeted, tipping his hat down as he flash me a smile.
“Morning to you too, L/n.” I greeted walking past him, I could tell he stopped walking for a few seconds because I didn’t hear his footsteps, I walked pass him so many times to the point I could distinguish his footsteps from others..would that be weird for others? I looked back to see that he wasn’t walking anymore, rather skipping like a happy person..cute..
Timeskip
Ugh finally, this day is finally over. I could go back home and rest..once the metal door opened I went inside and gave the doorman my ID and blah blah blah, the usual routine. After checking that I was the actual person, they finally opened the door to let me in the apartment. I walked up the stairs to the third floor which was tiring to say the least, and went to get my keys in my pocket. Once I got it I led the key to the knob but noticed something, the door that led to M/n’s room wasn’t lit up as usual. Usually he opens the lights after he’s back from his job, perhaps he’s later than usual? I sighed, it’s probably nothing I’m probably-
“Oh Mr. Mosses!” He greeted, I turned my head to see him standing beside me except..he doesn’t have his hat on, is this the first time I’ve seen him without it? “Looks like you got here first!”
“What do you mean?” I asked him, a bit confused
“Oh it’s nothing..” he said quickly “and uh-here!” He handed me a letter but it’s not showing the front, hold on a letter for me?
“Oh thank-“ before I could even thank him, he was already closing the door, he seems to be in a hurry. I checked the letter to see who it was from and saw that there was a heart, a love letter? But from who.. “From M/n L/n; to Francis Mosses..” I muttered.
Maybe he’s not as bad as I thought..
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brujamala-aka-gigi · 4 months ago
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what's keeping you away from genuine ways of expressing yourself?
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this is a pick a pile tarot reading inspired by the new moon in leo, but is not specific to this particular moment in time. in astrology, the moon represents the unconscious mind, your emotions and in which ways your intuition works, while the zodiac sign leo is more oriented towards the ego, creativity and social relations. all of those things that tend to characterize this sign, usually means that some level of efficient and assertive communication is valuable for keeping away drama and misunderstandings, therefore, i thought about making this general reading to see what advice the cards have for something quite difficult for almost everyone: remaining true to our essence and being able to communicate that in a way that is genuine to us, our identity, our desires and our feelings, no matter who is listening.
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pile 1 pile 2 pile 3
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images from pinterest and dividers by @fairytopea
꒰ঌ ✦ scroll down for the results ໒꒱ ༘*.゚
-ˋˏ ༻ ❁ Masterpost and Tarot Menu ❁༺ ˎˊ-
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˚ ༘ ೀpile number one ⋆。˚
Your card for this reading is the King of Swords. What this tells me is that you value intellectual honesty, and you’re willing to go against your own emotions if that means that you’ll find the truth and that you are very likely to be perceived as someone who doesn’t have a filter or is too honest. It’s key that you understand that even if you don’t allow yourself to be guided by emotional attachments, other people do. Being highly logical or highly sensitive are both valuable, and both ways of thinking and acting have their pros and cons. But this card wouldn’t pop up if the logical ways of approaching things wasn’t causing some issues. Although holding yourself to a high standard of rationality when it comes to manifestations of the unconscious or the way you naturally relate to others can be beneficial, I feel as if that is also causing you to react coldly to your own emotions, instead of embracing them. You need to let go of the idea that things must be coherent and make sense all time, we are humans, and many of what makes us human doesn’t make too much sense or doesn’t work according to logic. Seeking order, patterns and structure in places where there’s not a big need for those, is not going to give you the truths that serve your personal development. It’s key that you take some time to embrace what seems absurd about yourself, without looking for logic, but looking for experiences that will guide you to the answers you need.
˚ ༘ ೀpile number two ⋆。˚
The card for you on this reading is the Six of Wands. What I see here, is a lot of well deserved feelings of pride that you are protecting at all costs. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with being proud, and I don’t even think this is the actual issue here. What’s blocking your most honest expressions is the fact that you are not allowing yourself the possibility of making a mistake, as you might feel this could take away from all the achievements you’ve had before. It’s key to know, when to be vulnerable, when to take a risk and where you are safe to try things out for the first time, but you are still not comfortable enough to embrace things about yourself that make you insecure, which is completely valid and understandable. In your case, I think that is okay if you want to preserve a sense of control over how others perceive you, yet it wouldn’t be healthy to allow others to expect things from you that are far too demanding to keep up with sometimes. It is necessary that you start setting honest boundaries with others and with yourself, in order to preserve a healthy sense of worth. Your value as a person is not defined by your achievements, or your failures, it is defined by how and why you do what you do no matter the result. When your intentions are honest and you are trying to better yourself or help others, it doesn’t matter what the final outcome is.
˚ ༘ ೀpile number three ⋆。˚
Your card is the Chariot. The meaning of this card has to do with life experiences, movement and some level of chaos that is necessary in order to grow. I see that you are capable to maintain a certain level of peace of mind even when things around you are hectic, and this is something that might attract some people who are either amazed or envious of this.  In your case, I think that being all over the place (socially, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally) means that you are not quite sure yet on where you stand in relation to certain aspects of your life. This might seem like a problem, because some people are more settled on their beliefs or have more stable lives than you, but in reality, the fact that you are willing to try everything you can before committing is actually something that makes your life something richer. It’s completely normal to feel uncertain, confused and lost, but this shouldn’t keep you away from giving yourself the credit you deserve for the way you have chosen to experience life. Take some pride on what makes you different, and take pride on the process of self exploration you are, even if you are far away from finding a solid philosophy or stability in your life, embrace the fact you are capable of experiencing things without many attachments.
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-ˋˏ ༻ ❁ Masterpost and Tarot Menu ❁༺ ˎˊ-
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lynnie-ee · 2 months ago
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Inktober Day 2; Cupid.
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╰┈➤"Sometimes people need help to gather the courage to confess to someone...And they surely know how to encourage it. After all, who wouldn't help their sibling or son get the love of the Ramshackle Prefect?."
╰► Gender-neutral reader, scenarios, 1.9k words in total.
╰► Characters: Jade, Floyd, Lilia.
╰►Note: The prompts are based on words I found interesting and then I put them on a roulette to decide when I would write about them, lol. English is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any grammatical mistakes <3. Not proof read, I haven't written in a long time, so I apologise if anything is out of character.
╰►Masterlist / Inktober Masterlist.
⤿
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⤿
﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Jade Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
The words “scary” and “unnerving" could be the first thing to come to your mind when you think about Jade, especially now.
You had become more attached to Floyd in the past few months thanks to Ace, as the Octavinelle second-year attended the same club as your friend, which led you to visit him a few times at Mostro Lounge, encountering Jade in the process sometimes.
At first, it was casual, a single greeting when he passed beside the prefect, that’s it.
But then, Jade noticed how unusually excited his brother seemed to be, even more than usual, and he quickly figured out what he was up to.
Jade was delighted to see his brother in good moods more frequently now, knowing that, for once, he seemed committed to dedicating time to the little Shrimpy, as Floyd called you. However, were his brother’s feelings reciprocated? Were you honest with him? Jade would never allow a magicless human to make fun of his brother, even if Floyd was more than capable of deciding that by himself.
So, one evening, as you were looking for his twin, he decided to test your intentions.
⤿
“Good evening, Prefect.”
“Ah, Jade!” The Ramshackle student replied startled, as the vicehousewarden appeared suddenly behind them, out of nowhere. Well, they were in the middle of the Mostro Lounge, so it was expected for Jade to be around, just not that close. “I was looking for Floyd.”
“I thought you’d be here for him. Then, follow me, if you will.”
“Wouldn’t it be better to wait here for him? He usually-“
“Hm, I guess my assumptions about you were wrong if you rejected my offer to see my brother.”
“Assumptions?” They questioned, tilting their head to emphasize their curiosity.
“Would you like me to talk about it here? Where so many people can hear?” The second-year questioned, a trace of amusement in his voice.
“A quiet place would be better, yeah.” (Y/n) replied quickly, sensing the direction of their conversation, this time following Jade to the back of the Mostro Lounge without complaining.
“You have feelings for my brother.” Stated the merman, as soon as they reached a secluded corner, startling (Y/n) with the bluntness of his words.
“What…what takes you to that conclusion?” The prefect questioned nervously, punching themselves mentally for their lack of confidence, a death sentence in front of a Leech twin.
“You have spent a significant amount of time here lately. Sometimes you don’t even order anything, looking content just by staying at the tables to talk to my brother. Humans can be quite predictable sometimes, with that red tone on your cheeks every time Floyd is near, you don’t fool anyone, Prefect.”
“I don’t-“
“You don’t?” Jade remarked immediately, a sly grin on his face, as he looked the Prefect more closely as he spoke. “Perhaps, then, I misunderstood the situation. Could it be that instead of being interested in my brother, you were looking forward to seeing me?” He added, his face now mere inches away from the magicless human.
Close enough for him to use Shock the Heart, now that (Y/n) was distracted-
“You’re incorrect, in that one." The Ramshackle student corrected, slowly trying to sound more confident. “But you were correct earlier. I do like your brother, is there a problem with that?” They blurted out before they could regret it.
Jade smiled even more widely, if that was even possible. This action scared the Prefect even more, if that was even possible.
“Shrimpy, what did you just say? Why are you here with Jade? I’ve looked for you everywhereeee.” Floyd's pouting voice interrupted their conversation, his figure soon appearing in the middle of them.
“How long have you been there?!” The magicless student asked trying to mask their embarrassment.
“Enough to know you like me! C’mon Shrimpy, you’ve let me alone for too long.” Floyd whined, swiftly taking the Prefect between his arms to drag them outside Mostro Lounge.
“Fufu~Seems like Shock the Heart wasn’t necessary after all.”
⤿
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⤿
﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Floyd Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
He’s ecstatic, to say the least.
You started to see his brother more frequently after he offered you a free meal (it was one of his mushroom dishes. He used you as a lab rat, but you didn’t need to know that), which surprisingly, you liked. And then, you asked him where he got the ingredients, allowing Jade to talk for hours.
Floyd always found you interesting, but enduring Jade talking about the different types of mushrooms that could be found in Sage Island for hours? You were a tough one.
Then, Jade started to invite you to hikes frequently. And you spent time at Mostro Lounge. And you spent time at Octavinelle. And you talked to his brother in between classes.
And then, one day after he came back to his dorm after his club, he found you in their shared room as Jade showed you his collection of terrariums, and was the sign Floyd needed to know that Jade was being serious about this.
It seemed like the two of you were starting to fall for each other, which was cool and all that, but…that took too long. It was boring. Whether you were with his brother or not, it was simple.
⤿
“Ya like Jade, don’t you?” Floyd mentioned one day, as both of you walked towards the cafeteria. (Y/n) had decided to accompany Ace to the basketball club, and in the middle of it, Floyd asked them to join him to buy water at the cafeteria. Terrible choice.
“What…what did you say?” The Prefect quickly questioned, wondering if they heard something wrong.
“Yer in love with my brother or something like that?”
“What are you even saying? Haha, I think you’re misunderstanding something here…” They replied trying to look nonchalant, failing miserably as their nervous expression betrayed them immediately.
“You listened to his mushroom talk, you’re not gonna fool me into believing you did it without liking him.”
“Floyd, I-“
“You should confess. Get over it quickly.”
“Sorry? I don’t think I’m ready for-“
“What are you? A coward? Do you think my brother will say no?”
“…Maybe he will.” (Y/n) mumbled after a few seconds, as they saw there was no reason to deny their feelings, as Floyd seemed to have figured out already.
“He showed his terrarium collection, he’s gonna say yes.”
“He has shown them to other people too, you know?”
“Not the ones from his room.” Floyd replied with an obvious expression. “Just do it, Shrimpy.”
“It’s not that easy, Floyd, I’m afraid.” They confessed, sighing.
“I’d say it’s very easy, actually. Look, Jade’s there.” Pointed the second year suddenly, making the Prefect look towards the other side of the hallway, where the vicehousewarden walked calmly. “Hey, Jade, Shrimpy here wants to tell you something!” He called loudly, promptly pushing the magicless student towards his brother.
“Having Shrimpy as a sibling-in-law will be so funny~.”
⤿
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﹙⚔﹚Lilia Vanrouge ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
He’s not subtle. Like, at all.
Now, don’t be mistaken; he’d never reveal Silver’s feelings to you. He knows how to guard his son’s privacy. However, that doesn’t stop him from pointing Silver’s strong traits to you, every single time he can.
It starts small, as you both walk around the halls, passing outside the gym. Did you know physical training was Silver’s best subject? No? How strange, he thought it was nice for you to know.
Then you both greet Riddle on your way to class. He’s in the same club as Silver, you know? He’s very good a it, after all, he has such a nice physical condition, he could carry you easily if you ask him. Why would Silver carry you? No reason in particular, it was just an example, similar to the people that carry their partners, which is just another example, don’t worry.
Until that, you had just answered by nodding at his words, thinking that perhaps Lilia just held Silver in high regard, but then you decided to agree to the compliments.
⤿
“How have you been doing in Magical Analysis? Is it too difficult for you?” Lilia asked you one day, as you both drank tea (that you offered to prepare) in the middle of the Diasomnia lounge.
“A little bit, considering that I’m magicless and all that.” Replied the Prefect without much worry.
“That’s a pity. Perhaps Silver could tutor you? He did great in his first year in the subject, in his first test he scored a-“
“Isn’t Sebek like very good at Magical Analysis? I’ve considered asking him for help but perhaps if you tell him he’d be more open to help.”
“…Maybe, he will. However, Silver is very good at teaching, I’m sure he’ll be delighted to be able to help you.”
“I don’t doubt it, after all, he’s very kind.” (Y/n) commented, sipping on their tea.
“Oh, so you think he’s kind?” The Diasomnia vicehousewarden asked, a big smile on his expression.
“…Yeah, that was what I just said.”
“What else?”
“About what?”
“About Silver, what do you think of him?”
“Well…He’s a very nice friend, easy-going, and calm. He’s one of the few people that seem normal, among all the crazy students here.” The Prefect replied honestly.
“Indeed, he’s very charming, don’t you think? Although I don’t see you often around him, I didn’t know you were friends.”
“Usually, we don’t see each other in school. But lately, we’ve talked quite a lot at night. Sometimes, he goes looking for Malleus at my dorm and we stay chatting for a while.”
“Just that?”
“Uhm, we also hang out sometimes after class, he asks me to talk to him when he gets sleepy in the afternoon. Or sometimes he invites me to help him to take care of the little animals that usually follow him.”
“Oooh~I see.” He smiled mischievously. “You talk very fondly of him, dear. Are you sure you two are just friends?”
“Of course, Lilia.” The magicless student replied quickly, chuckling.
“Are you 100% sure?” He questioned again; this time more insistent.
The Prefect remained quiet for a few seconds, surprising themselves when they felt the heat rushing to their cheeks when they thought of Silver, as handsome and gentle as he was.
‘Could it be…?'
“Cat got your tongue, Prefect?”
“No, Lilia, I was just thinking…”
“You can tell me, dear, I swear I won’t tell anyone.”
“Well, it’s just that I…I don’t know if I see him just as a friend.”
“Oh ~ tell me more.”
“Silver has been so attentive and sweet with me…It’d be hard for me not to develop feelings for him, you know?” They mumbled, shyly.
“Of course! Love appears naturally, it’s normal for you to notice until now.” Lilia replied, an overjoyed expression adorning his features. “But it can’t slip away if you don’t do anything about it, Prefect. Perhaps you should be honest with him.”
“You think?”
“I know Silver very well; he’ll listen to you and he’ll know you have good intentions.”
“You may be right, Lilia. I have to go, if you excuse me, I think he’s about to finish his club practice.”
“Good luck, Prefect, I trust you’ll do well.”
Lilia chuckled softly as he saw the Prefect leaving the dorm with a nervous expression but with so much fondness towards his son.
“Ah, young love, always a delight to see.”
⤿
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alphajocklover · 2 months ago
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I really want a hot boyfriend. does instajock always make you straight or can I use it on a guy to make him more my type? (and maybe also make me more his type)
So, I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding, one that I want to clear up. While I do my best to report on different transformation methods, I can’t include every detail about every one of them. My posts are relatively short and don’t always cover everything, because if I did it would take forever. The lack of details, plus some distracting pictures, leads to a lot of people getting details mixed up or getting confused. It’s happened before, and I think it’s what is happening here. I say this because as far as I can remember I have never mentioned anything about InstaJock turning someone straight.
InstaJock can change a person's sexuality, theoretically, through the settings and details section that I've mentioned in previous posts. The thing is, it normally doesn’t. Instajock changes its users personality, their body, and their mind, but for some reason their sexuality will usually stay the same. They’ll become more openly sexual, and also often very flirtatious to fit their new jock persona, but their sexual identity doesn’t change. Even when their sexuality does change it usually turns them gay, not straight.  For some reason the app's already confusing setting page is set up so it's a lot easier to set your sexuality to gay then to straight. My best guess for why the app is set up that way is that the creator, or creators, are gay themselves and have a thing for jocks. I mean, you don’t make a seemingly impossible app that changes people into dumb jocks if you don’t have some sort of kink for it.. So, If you use the app on someone who's already gay you’ve probably got nothing to worry about. Chances are they’ll stay gay, unless they happen to have a huge conversion kink and are really good with computers. Anyways, now that we’ve cleared up that issue let's get into the specifics of your issue. 
Changing someone's personality and identity so that they’ll be your ideal boyfriend is… pretty questionable, if I’m being honest. But so is much of what happens in the world of transformations, so I’ll focus on the ‘how to’ rather than the morals. Your first problem is one I’ve brought up before: You can only give someone the app if you already have the app. Only an already transformed Jock can invite another person to InstaJock. You’d only be able to transform him,but only if you are changed yourself. I know you said you’d be with being changed, but once you become a jock figuring out the app will be much harder, so you might not end up his type, or he might not end up yours. I think your best bet would be to convince a jock to change both of you. InstaJock users can send out multiple invites at once, so it would be easy even for him. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if he makes a dumb mistake. He is a jock afterall.
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I do hope this works out for you. Not because I approve of what you’re doing, but because there are a lot of ways this could go wrong. One of you could have your sexuality changed when you get transformed, the jock who changes you both might make you brothers instead of boyfriends, or you and he could just not click. Just because someones your type doesn’t mean they’re the right person for you. Even if you and your target don’t end up together, I think you will have a much easier time getting a boyfriend after you use InstaJock. I hate to be shallow, but dating is usually easier when you have a 6 pack and huge pecs.
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fen-luciel · 4 months ago
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The mistakes of a Acolyte
ATTENTION
This post is an experiment; for now, I'll publish only a few chapters to see if anyone new is interested. The story is currently ongoing on AO3.
WARNINGS: Unplanned pregnancy/toxic relationship/Sith oc-reader
Story: Many wrong choices had brought me to that moment.
Few were the ones I regretted.
Getting pregnant by Qimir? I don't think I'll ever have a definite answer to that.
All I needed to know was that I had to escape to a galaxy far, far away.
-Chapters
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Shopping was perhaps the worst part of the week. Summer had just arrived on the planet and the heat had always been unbearable, so being five months pregnant, everything had worsened from 1 to 100. Especially the sweat under my breasts and the belly that was terribly enormous for my current situation. The only positive part was that occasionally some neighbor would recognize me to help, but that wasn’t one of those lucky days.
I continued to walk through the market, armed with bags full of groceries. There wasn’t much left, but I had to get at least the fruit before heading home. The streets were full of all kinds of people and aliens, the stalls in full swing, yet something was off.
It was a feeling... that I hadn't felt in months, as if the Force was around me. But not the usual hum of life around me, or... the presence of someone familiar, just a powerful force lurking.
I tried to look around but saw nothing suspicious or resembling a Jedi or a Sith. I sighed before continuing my walk to the end of the street where the fruit stall was. Fortunately, the Twi'lek there knew me well and ran over to take my bags and place them on the counter. "What were you thinking? Here alone, you need a hand" I laughed slightly, following her at a slower pace. "Yeah well, as a single mother, it’s difficult, don't worry, I'll grab the last things and head home," I slowly touched my stomach, looking around. "The usual?" She asked kindly, to which I nodded, continuing to look around for new things. "Do you have something sweeter than the usual purple fruit with the unpronounceable name?" I said with a sly smile. "Unfortunately not, rather, do you want my husband to accompany you home? These are really a lot of bags" she replied, but I shook my head before taking the wallet from my bag and leaving the credits on the counter. "Don't worry, it’s not far and—" "And we will help her," said a male voice behind me.
It was like a flash of realization, behind me, strong and clear, I could feel the Force pulsing alive, after months of being shut off from it. I turned sharply and in front of me, two men in Jedi uniforms smiled kindly. My breath caught in my throat; it was impossible for them to know me, and I certainly didn't recognize them, but it was obvious they were here for me. And not just to help a poor pregnant woman.
"Excuse me, I..." but the taller of the two with dark skin took the bags the Twi'lek had handed him, full of groceries. "Wait..." "Don't complain, Sabrina, you're lucky to have two Jedi helping you, now go home and rest" she interrupted with a smile while I stood bewildered at the counter. "It's okay, Miss Sabrina, we'll accompany you home" said the other, offering me an arm which I reluctantly took. I certainly couldn’t make a scene in the store, or all the cover I had built would be blown, and in this condition hiding again might be impossible.
We walked out of the store slowly; despite the tension, I couldn’t deny that support was useful after all the walking I had done today. "So? Do you intend to introduce yourselves?" I said looking ahead, keeping my face stoic. The older man nodded before indicating himself. "You're right, we were rude. I am Master Sol, and this is Knight Yord, we apologize for the sudden intrusion, but we have been looking for you." I glanced at him sideways; the name Sol was familiar, although it could mean anything. "I am Sabrina. But let’s be honest, you're not here to help random passers by; we're on a distant planet in the Outer Rim, the Jedi have no supervision here, are you perhaps on vacation?" I said with a tight smile, allowing myself a nervous joke. Maybe I was too hasty with the questions, but I preferred to be the one asking rather than answering them. The two laughed briefly as we continued towards home; at this point, acting suspiciously would be worse. It wasn’t as if I could run very far; it was obvious the two were not mere padawans or inexperienced. "Actually, we're here for you. Or rather, we believe you know someone we're looking for" Sol said, still with a gentle smile. I looked at him confused, but my heart began to beat fast in my chest. I wanted to stay calm, afraid the two could sense my mood change, but the terror that my worst nightmare would come true clouded my rationality. There could be many possibilities, or just one, maybe being caught now would be better.
I freed myself from his grasp, pulling out the keys in front of the apartment building where I lived, searching for the door card. "Oh yeah? And who? I guess you have a name" the card activated, opening the glass doors. I gently touched my belly to hide the trembling of my hands. Neighbors came out right at that moment, an elderly couple who greeted me kindly. "Oh dear, you went shopping alone? Fortunately, you met these kind gentlemen to help you, you shouldn’t strain yourself in your condition." I could only smile at their concern. The affection people had shown me here since they found out I was a single mother was constant, help, advice, an atmosphere I had rarely encountered in my life and which had truly made me fall in love with this place. "I know, but it was really an emergency, I swear I'll ask for help next time" I replied, nodding slightly at other kind admonitions before waving goodbye and continuing to my apartment. Reaching the elevator with the two Jedi silently following me until then. "You have a warm neighborhood" said Sol as we went up to the fourth floor. I nodded, glancing at them behind me when the doors opened, and we walked into the hallway. "Yes, they’ve all been kind since I arrived, I’ve been lucky. Anyway, you were saying..." finally in front of the door, I took the right key from my pocket, but just as I was about to continue, the other young man spoke for the first time, interrupting me. "Does the name Qimir mean anything to you?"
It was like a bucket of cold water in the face. Of course. Obviously, they were looking for him. How could I have even hoped it was something else? Everything had been too quiet; it was obvious it wouldn’t stop without me, but now... there were Jedi knocking at my door. Asking if I knew him. So maybe all was not yet lost. "Sabrina? Did you hear what we said?" I turned to realize the two were looking at me, confused and a bit worried. Sol was staring at me intensely; it was obvious he understood that I knew something, I had lost awareness of my surroundings for a few seconds. "Yes, I'm just... very tired" I replied in a lower voice than I wanted. I turned to the door to open the lock, my hands visibly trembling, and they noticed it too. I tried to reach for the lock, but Sol's gentle hand took the card from me and opened the door. "Here, let's go in, you need to sit down."
The first lights of sunset were starting to enter through the window I had left open. The apartment was in shadow thanks to the sunshade of the windows, leaving the place mostly in the dark. I walked slowly into the living room, Sol at my side, concern written on his face. I turned to Yord, who still held the shopping bags, and looked around confused for a few seconds. Qimir's name echoed in my chest, choking my throat. "Can I..." but he seemed to understand immediately, shaking his head as he placed the bags on the kitchen counter. "I'll put away the groceries."
I stood there like an unsure idiot, unsure of what to say or do, as Yord opened my fridge in silence while emptying the bags. Sol's gentle but firm touch pushed me onto the sofa, where several pillows were positioned to help me sit comfortably and get up alone. I was gently pushed onto them, my tense body melting into the soft material, my feet on fire, but the worst was still in my chest, where my breath struggled to pass through as I kept myself contracted and tense. "We know you were... friends, I guess." He began rummaging through his clothes before pulling out an old printed photograph.
I recognized it immediately, the same tear at the corner, the slight stain of spilled coffee at the base, and in the image, me... and Qimir. I remember the day we took it; we had the hologram, but it was inconvenient to carry, so we had it printed, two identical ones to always carry with us on missions, both smiling while his arm warmly circled my waist, my head on his shoulder, my gaze happy... almost... in love. Ironic that I realized it when I had already made the most drastic decision. Qimir, however, always had that smile, the one of someone who knows too much and doesn't want to tell you out of spite. I hated his insolence when I first met him, but over time I got used to it as he got used to my ironic comments. We loved teasing each other; at first glance, we looked like two insolent kids... two lovers taking a photo. "Please, Sabrina. We need your help. This man... has committed unspeakable actions. The Order has been searching for him for years, and now more than ever, we need a hand," but I could only continue to look at that photo. I already knew everything. Of course, I knew.
"Where did you get it?" I said, keeping a more steady tone. Sure, I had left, but I wouldn’t betray him. Especially not to the Jedi. I was good at lying, but I needed to play this better; they definitely wouldn’t leave without answers, and they knew I had them. I took the photo and held it in my hands. I still had mine, hidden in the same box where I had placed the few things I hadn’t had the courage to throw away. "We managed to bring him out into the open after months of intensive searches. When he escaped, we searched through his things and the only thing that linked him to someone or something was this photo." Internally, I breathed a sigh of relief. At least I knew he hadn’t been caught or that he was on my trail, though I couldn’t be sure about the latter. Keeping our photo wasn’t typical behavior for him towards things that pissed him off. I took for granted that he wasn’t happy about my disappearance.
"I... I can't tell you much, I haven't seen him in months, I cut off all contact... and before you ask, I have no idea where he might be, disappearing without a word was his hobby." I had to choose my words carefully, say half-truths that would seem plausible without exposing myself... or us too much. "But in the photo you look close" continued Yord, walking near the couch, the groceries neatly stored on the shelves. I let out a sigh mixed with a smile. "Oh yes. Something like that, but we've always been two solitary souls, we needed our own space, so we had our secrets" I sighed before casually dropping the photo on the wooden table in front of me. "Honestly, I wouldn't know how to help you find him and I'd prefer to stay as far away from him as possible." Sol beside me adjusted his seat before giving a reassuring smile. "Anything about him would be helpful. I also want to understand your relationship more... if you think you're in danger, you can tell us, we can protect you." I gripped the fabric of my dress to distract myself from the laugh threatening to escape my throat. "The fact that you are here is already a problem for me. For all I know, he might have followed you. Qimir is many things, but he’s not an idiot." I sighed before starting to get up slowly. Yord at my side leaned in to give me a hand, but I ignored him, placing a foot on the edge of the table to try and unlace my shoes, at which point the Jedi bent down again to do it for me. "Wait, there's no need-" "I want to. You look tired, and we're disturbing you, it's the least I can do." I looked at him a bit irritated, the kindness of the Jedi had always seemed insincere to me, so good it felt fake. But I let him do it, it’s not every day you have a Jedi kneeling in front of you of his own will, and I couldn't deny it amused me terribly. "Anyway, Qimir and I were friends for a long time before..." I considered whether to tell the truth or not, but the months were too precise for me to take such a risk; if they had already asked someone about me, they would realize I was hiding something. "Well, as you can see with your own eyes, before we became something more," I gave a strained smile, indicating my belly. With my feet free of the shoes, Yord standing in front of me looked at me intensely, they had probably already considered that my pregnancy might not be with a casual someone. I walked towards the window, enjoying the twilight sky. "I left as soon as I found out I was expecting. I... I knew what kind of life he led, I imagined he wouldn’t let go just like that, I was afraid of his reaction to everything. To us, to this baby, to what he would do as a result. So I took my things and left." Sol was frowning at my words. Or maybe at the casual way I said them. Too bad. "You knew he was a Sith? About his actions? And you stayed with him anyway?" he asked. "Yes. Well, it’s not like he was very explicit about it, he told me it was his religion, it’s not like I was an expert, he talked about passion and... I don’t know, it seemed normal to me. I’ve met civilians with worse morals" I said honestly at the last part. The two seemed satisfied with my answer so I continued, "Besides, it’s not like I’m some innocent soul. That's how I met him, I was smuggling goods and sometimes we collaborated." Yord gave me an arrogant smile, "and you’re telling us this openly?" I chuckled in response. "I know my rights, kid, we’re outside your jurisdiction and even if accused, you wouldn’t have proof. Who knows, maybe I’ve been doing this job since you became a Jedi." I gave him a smirk which he returned mockingly. For being one of them, he seemed strangely likable.
"In any case. I would kindly ask you to continue this conversation another day, it’s getting late and I’d like to be alone." The two exchanged a look but nodded understandingly, "certainly, maybe we can continue tomorrow?" said Sol as he got up and moved towards the door, followed by the younger one. "Certainly," I replied with a half-smile, following them to the door. At the hallway, they gave a small bow before giving a final goodbye and walking towards the corridor. Reaching the elevator, Yord gave me one last look before smiling and winking at me. Only when I heard the elevator start did I allow myself to release the breath I had been holding until then. Back inside the house, a sense of terror hung in the air.
I was in deep shit.
Fuck.
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katnissegf · 1 year ago
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Dating Katniss & Peeta headcanons
pairing: poly!everlark x fem!reader (katniss everdeen x reader x peeta mellark)
warnings: polyamorous relationship, use of pet names, a lot of fluff, suggestive themes, TW: GALE (🤢), english is not my first language so there might be spelling mistakes.
notes: this is my first time writing in YEARS. but i’m so into the hunger games fandom right now so here’s this. hope you enjoy <3
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after the games, neither of them returned to being the same.
when they returned home, they became so much more overprotective than they were in the past with you.
want to visit your family? peeta will be there with you. need to go somewhere? katniss will go with you.
to be honest you can’t blame them, you know they are like this now because of how scared they are of losing you. and you adore them for that.
but also, overprotective in the jealousy way.
peeta has never been a jealous boyfriend. if he sees you or katniss flirting with someone else, his heart would shatter into pieces, feeling not enough for either of you, but he would never say a word about it.
meanwhile, katniss.. well, she’s not afraid to make it clear what belongs to her.
there was this time when gale came up to talk to you on the reaping day, he said he was 'concerned about you.'
your girlfriend noticed his intentions to flirt with you and quickly got closer to steal your attention, placing a hand on your waist and giving gale a death stare.
he never tried to flirt with you in her presence again.
peeta is literally obsessed with both, you and katniss. he would die for the two of you.
in the other hand, katniss would kill for the two of you. you guys are her whole universe.
in the afternoon, you usually have baking lessons with peeta as your teacher.
if you end up burning something, he says, “don’t worry darling, next time will turn out better.”
sometimes, when you join her on the hunt, katniss tries to teach you how to use the bow and arrow as well.
“i don’t know, i think i prefer watching you do it than doing it myself.”
“c’mon baby, it’s going to be fun. for me?”
of course, you agree just to see her happy.
since they returned home, it’s normal for both of them to have nightmares every night.
to katniss, it helps when you run your fingers through her hair while she rests her head on your chest. peeta always takes her hand to let her know he’s there, even when he’s scared too.
when peeta is the one that wakes up from a terrible dream, he immediately becomes the little spoon and lets both of his girlfriends hug him. this helps him calm down and quickly go back to sleep.
every morning, you braid katniss’s hair while peeta braids yours. <3
you and peeta take care of the garden, and always suprise katniss with flowers.
okay but.. heavy make out sessions.
peeta holds you tight onto his lap and kisses your neck while katniss kisses your mouth like her life depends on it.
they’re always so sweet with you and your body, because it’s probably their favorite thing on the world.
both of them always ask for consent before touching or even kissing you, they respect you so much.
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joekeeryswife · 9 months ago
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Love island Episode one: Coupling up.
a/n: it’s here! thank you to everyone who voted over this past week. here is the love island series. Mason has his pretty prince hair😍. villa is the 2019 UK love island villa, it will get better but i wanted to get the coupling up over with. anyways sorry if there is any mistakes, enjoy reading 🩰
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you’d never been this nervous before. sure you’d been nervous but never this bad. you had been scouted for love island by the producers and you thought you’d give it a go. you had a pretty big following being a model/influencer with just over 500k followers and this would be the perfect opportunity for you to finally find love instead of focusing on your job.
you walked into the villa in you hot pink bikini, you picked it because it would stand out and that’s what you wanted to do. you wanted to make a good first impression on whoever was in here. you made your way to the garden and saw four other girls meaning you were the last to enter before you saw Maya Jama.
“hey everyone” you said making the four girls turn towards you and scream with excitement. they met you halfway and one by one introduced themselves to you. “i’m Molly nice to meet you” she kissed you on the cheek and hugged you closely. the next girl hugged you “hi im Chloe” she hugged you.
“i’m Anna” she hugged you and kissed your cheek and then you finally moved onto the last girl “im Amber nice to meet you” you didn’t know what it was but the girls even though you hadn’t been in there long had all made you feel welcome already.
“i’m y/n, nice to meet you all” you were still nervous as Molly poured you a drink. “so, tell us about you y/n. what’s your type?” you took a sip of the champagne before starting. “well, i’m 22, in a model and influencer. my type is tall, tattoos, brown hair brown eyes, tanned skin, someone who’s athletic and don’t think i’m weird but i love noses” the girls laughed.
“don’t worry y/n, i’m with you on that one” Chloe laughed. “tell me about you girls then, we are gonna be living together for a while” you tucked your hair behind your ear as you listened to them.
Chloe started “well, i’m 25, i’m a marketing executive. my type is anyone who is taller than me to be honest. i don’t really have a type i usually go for. i like anyone, and i do have a thing for noses” you laughed again knowing that this was gonna be a recurring thing that you would all speak about.
“as you know i’m Molly, i’m 23 and i’m an influencer. my usual type is a tall brunette but i’m open to get to know everyone here” you nodded and then Anna started talking. “so i’m a pharmacist and my usual type is anyone taller than me, because i’m so tall i want someone taller than me”
to be honest Anna was very tall so it wasn’t a shock that she’d want someone taller than her. lastly Amber started talking “i’m a beautician so i do facials, lashes, lip filler, everything like that and my usual type is tall dark and handsome, i don’t know how else to explain it” you all laughed and then you all heard a voice behind you.
“hello girls” you turned towards the voice and saw Maya standing there. a few of the girls screamed, seeing her made this experience feel so much more real. “how about we all gather around the fire pit and have a chat?” all of you made your way over to the fire pit and sat down.
“so, Amber, tell me, how are you feeling about being here? are you nervous? excited?” Amber nodded “yeah i’m excited because you never know who’s gonna come through that door like it could be the love of my life” her gordie accent thick as she spoke.
you all laughed and nodded, you really never knew who was about to come through the door. “Chloe, do you think you could meet someone here? or are you skeptical about it all” Chloe shrugged “i’m pretty skeptical but i’m optimistic about the whole thing. i’m excited to meet everyone else”
“okay well, are we ready to meet some boys?” you all cheered and made your way over to the five love hearts that were by the pool. you were on the fourth heart in between Anna and Chloe. “right, remember girls that you can step forward for the guy you like but he can pick any one of you even if you don’t step forward” Maya spoke so you understood the rules.
“let’s welcome our first boy Ovie” you all looked toward the door and saw him, he was very good looking. you all clapped as he made his way down the steps. “you girls doing alright?” you all said yes as he stood next to Maya. “so girls, step forward if you like the look of Ovie” you looked at the girls and saw Anna, Chloe and Amber step forward.
“wow three girls stepping forward already. Amber, why did you step forward?” Maya questioned “he’s just really good looking, definitely my type” Ovie was shocked that three girls stepped forward for him. he was hoping for at least one let alone three.
“y/n, why didn’t you step forward?” you blushed “now don’t get me wrong you’re very good looking but i just want to see the other options before i step forward for someone” Ovie and Maya nodded understanding where you were coming from.
“okay Ovie you have three beautiful girls who have stepped forward for you but who have you decided you are going to pick?” he was silent for a few minutes before he finally spoke up “the girl i would like to couple up with is Anna” Anna clapped with excitement that Ovie picked her. to be honest when they stood next to each other they looked perfect together.
“okay, next boy we have coming in is Toby” you all clapped again as he made his way down the steps and you heard Chloe whisper ‘oh my god’. she liked him for definite. “okay girls, if you like the look of Toby please step forward” straight away Chloe stepped forward. Chloe was the only one who stepped forward for Toby.
“okay ones not bad” he said making you frown but you quickly changed your face back to normal. “Toby you have Chloe who has stepped forward for you, would you like to couple up with Chloe or would you like to couple up with someone else?” Maya said fidgeting on her feet.
“Chloe is beautiful so i’m going to couple up with Chloe” you all clapped as Toby made his way over to Chloe and he kissed her on her cheek. Chloe blushed and smiled happily that Toby picked her.
“Molly why haven’t you stepped forward for any of the boys?” Maya asked looking at her intensely. “they just aren’t my type really, i bet they’re lovely but i’m just waiting for that spark straight away” Maya nodded “okay well i think you may like this next boy then, please welcome Tommy”
Molly gasped as he made his way down the steps, she was in shock at how good looking he was. “okay girls, if you like the look of Tommy please step forward” Amber and Molly stepped forward. “wow two girls, didn’t expect that” Tommy said smiling widely. “well, Molly and Amber have stepped forward for you Tommy, who would you like to couple up with? remember you can pick someone who has stepped forward for you, in a couple or even a girl who hasn’t stepped forward.
Tommys eyes scanned through the girls before making his decision. “i would like to couple up with Molly” she jumped a little as Tommy picked her. “thank you for picking me” Molly said as she gave Tommy a hug and he kissed her on the cheek. “you’re welcome beautiful” she blushed brightly.
“okay girls, last two boys. y/n, do you think you will step forward? you haven’t stepped forward for anyone” you nodded “i know, i feel bad but no one has really caught my eye yet” Maya understood “hopefully someone will catch you eye” you agreed.
“okay girls welcome Curtis” you didn’t even like the sound of that name right off the bat and seeing him just solidified that for you. he was not your type at all. “okay girls, if you like the look of Curtis please step forward” you were not stepping forward. you didn’t want to just step forward because you had too, you were here for yourself.
it was silent for a few minutes and sadly no one stepped forward for Curtis. his smile faltered slightly before he quickly put it back on his face. “oh Curtis i’m sorry” Maya said and he just shrugged it off “it’s no bother, they just haven’t gotten to know me yet.” he replied.
“okay well don’t worry, you can couple up with any of these girls. who would you like to couple up with?” Maya continued “i would like to couple up with y/n” your heart dropped but you didn’t show your sadness, you just had to get on with it.
Curtis made his way over to you and gave you an awkward hug. “y/n, how are you feeling?” god you hated that she had to ask you that “oh uhh, i’m glad i got picked but i just didn’t see that initial attraction but i guess i don’t know Curtis?” you sounded like you were questioning yourself.
“okay well, let’s see our next boy. please welcome Mason” you turned your head toward the door and your heart started beating. there he was and you were in shock at how pretty he was. “hey everyone” he said, even his voice was sexy. “girls, if you like the look of Mason please step forward” straight away you stepped forward as did Chloe and Amber followed.
“wow y/n, i’m shocked. you actually stepped forward for someone” you blushed and laughed. “well, it glad she did step forward for me” Mason winked at you and you felt weak. he was making you feel things you’d never felt before.
“Mason you have the choice to couple up with any of these girls, who would you like to couple up with?” Mason answered straight away “y/n” you were ecstatic. “that means Curtis automatically couples up with Amber” Curtis walked over to Amber and Mason made his way over to you and kissed you on the cheek and pulled you into a nice hug. “nice to meet you” he said as you stepped back to the heart.
“nice to meet you too. thank you for choosing me” your body felt hot, he was the perfect man by looks, and he had a nice nose. “well, you’re a beautiful girl. i’m excited to get to know you” you locked eyes with him, his eyes were dark brown but in the sunlight you could see golden hues which were so pretty.
“okay guys, everyone is now coupled up. i’ll leave you too it and remember, if you don’t get to know anyone your place in the villa may be at risk. good luck” with that Maya left and it felt even more real. “should we go over to the swing? i want to know more about you” you nodded your head and smiled. Mason grabbed ahold of your hand and the two of you headed over to the swing.
*to be continued*
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holdmymallowsweet · 4 months ago
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What are you doing here? 01
Ominis Gaunt x f!MC Word count: 4328, properly tagged on AO3
Chapter summary: Falling right between the awkwardness of their first encounter outside the Undercroft and their jaunt into the Scriptorium, Ominis and the new fifth year have an innocuous little meet up in the library. 
a/n: I’ve always wondered why Mc would offer to talk to Ominis about the Scriptorium, when their last interaction outside the Undercroft was so hostile, and I figured there could have been another conversation in between- not anything deep or meaningful, just a little chat that made it clear that they don’t hate each other. So that’s what this is, and although it’s now the first chapter/prologue of a slow-burn longfic, it was originally a oneshot and can still be read as such, if you prefer. Enjoy! And many, many thanks to @myokk for encouraging me to finally post this, you're the best ❤️
Masterlist || Chapter 02
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Chapter 01 - Invitation
Sending her that letter might have been a mistake.
Ominis Gaunt had been sitting in the library for hours now, waiting for someone who, he now realised, in all likelihood would not come.
“I heard you running around aimlessly in the defence against the dark arts tower again today. If you enjoy my company that much, perhaps you would like to join me in the library this evening. I’ll wait.”
It was supposed to be a playful way of telling her he was not angry anymore, a sort of peace offering after he had yelled at her outside the Undercroft. 
It was only after he’d sent the letter that he realised it probably sounded presumptuous and rude beyond belief. Words on parchment couldn’t tell the reader what tone of voice they’d like to be read in, at least not until someone invented a spell for that, but it was too late to take it back.
He sighed. Honestly, he could not remember what possessed him to write the blasted thing in the first place. It had been a whim, a result of his frustration and loneliness when he heard he’d be spending another evening alone because Sebastian had gotten himself detention again. He was not usually that bold, and she was practically a stranger.
They did happen to share a best friend in Sebastian though, so one could hardly blame him for trying to get to know her. In fact, it might be long overdue.
At least that was the excuse he’d use if anyone asked. Or the one he told himself, to be honest.
The truth was, she intrigued him. It took him some time to realise it, but now that he did, he couldn’t let go of the feeling. If Sebastian was to be believed, she was curious about him too, or at least she had been, for a fleeting moment- before his temper got the better of him and he took his frustrations about Sebastian’s betrayal out on her.
Ominis sighed again and ran his hand through his hair.
Someone from across the table shushed him, and his face twitched in slight annoyance.
Oh, he really hoped they’d be gone by the time she showed up, whoever they were.
If she showed up.
By now, it seemed more likely that he’d stay here sulking by his lonesome until it was time to walk back to the dungeons, perhaps facing a bemused Sebastian who’d already know where he’d been. The two of them seemed incapable of keeping secrets from one another, after all.
That would ultimately be the proper punishment for his unreasonable jealousy, her rejection delivered by his best friend.
He’d come to the library with every intention of writing the assigned essay for Herbology, determined not to care too much about whether she’d take him up on his invitation, but it was a lost cause. His self-spelling quill wouldn’t work properly unless he concentrated on the precise words he wanted to put on the parchment, but with his head filled with thoughts of the new fifth year and the undefined nature of whatever relationship they did or didn’t have, all he had managed to write so far was an embarrassing mess.
Ominis considered writing with his own hand, but thought better of it. He could, of course. He’d make notes or short letters without his enchanted quill regularly, but writing an entire essay without being able to tell when the lines would inadvertently run into one another was a daunting task. He’d have to use twice as much parchment as anyone else, and he already felt sorry for Professor Garlick, if she’d have to decipher the mess.
Finally, he decided to just give it up. The door opened, and once again, he strained his ears. He was able to recognize her footsteps by now. Not her, just some unfortunate chap getting chewed out by Madam Scribner for returning his books late.
He was starting to feel ridiculous.
It felt like hours since he’d hurried through the castle, almost slipping on the wet fallen leaves covering the stairs when he left the owlery. Heart thumping with excitement, he’d even made sure to sit at a table where he would, hopefully, be seen by her as soon as she walked in, but far enough away from the librarian to have a conversation without being reprimanded for disturbing the peace and quiet.
Actually, if he hadn’t been so concerned that she might not see him and leave, or that he might miss her coming in, he would have preferred a table in the farthest corner on the second floor, away from prying eyes. She was still the talk of the school and gathered attention wherever she went, and “What is she doing with Gaunt?” was not something he wanted to hear whispered in the corridors.
Thankfully, it was one of the last warm and sunny days before the autumn chill fully set in, so most students were happy to make the most of it and took their work outside. Even Cressida Blume still seemed determined to let Madam Scribner forget her face (not that she would), and he hadn’t heard any other classmate of theirs either. 
Sebastian’s detention was pointless busy work as usual- scrubbing or cleaning or something of the sort. Truthfully, Ominis had ceased to pay attention when his friend complained about his punishments long ago. Whatever it was, it kept him far away from the library- no one was foolish enough to try and “punish” Sebastian by letting him get his hands on even more books.
Not that it mattered whether they knew the curious onlookers or not. She was still the object of everyone’s interest and admiration, and with the way things were going, that wasn’t likely to change anytime soon. Not while she was so eager and endearing, always willing to drop everything the second someone needed something from her.
Right, it wasn’t like her to deny a request from a fellow student. She’d usually jump at the chance to do someone a favour, even if it came from someone she’d never seen before, even if it was much more bothersome than studying in the library for an hour or two.
So why wasn’t she here?
She wouldn’t have shown anyone his letter, would she? Unless she didn’t have to, if the owl reached her at an inopportune time, Merlin knows who else might have read it over her shoulder.
Ominis could imagine it, them sitting in a circle in the Hufflepuff girl’s dormitory, passing his letter around, seemingly teasing her about it in a playful attempt to get her to be wary of him. Until her curiosity would get the better of her and she’d ask them why precisely they found him so disagreeable. He shuddered. 
According to Sebastian, she already knew. She knew, and didn’t care. 
According to Sebastian, she also felt apologetic and regretful about their last encounter, much like him.
And if that was the truth- he couldn’t be entirely sure it was, but if it was, why wasn’t she here? Ominis tapped his quill against the parchment, piercing tiny holes into it and probably soaking the table underneath with ink. 
He was slowly but surely getting annoyed now. If she was as regretful about invading the Undercroft as Sebastian had made it seem, she should have pounced at the chance to meet up with him and make things right.
Of course, that had been weeks ago, so she might have gotten over it by now. Still, he wasn’t good enough for her to at least show up and quietly do her homework on the opposite side of the table? It wasn’t as if she didn’t have any work to do. She always did, with all the extra assignments the Professors threw at her to help her catch up, and even if by some miracle she didn’t, it wouldn’t hurt her to simply study, for once.
She could have come. Ominis frowned. Unless she actually couldn’t.
Notorious troublemaker and rule breaker that she was, he’d often half jokingly wondered when her recklessness would come to bite her in the arse, only it wasn’t unthinkable, was it?
Her duelling skills didn’t make her invincible, it was entirely possible that she was lying dead, or dying, somewhere on the cold forest floor. Small animals and insects already crawling under her robes and the scarf she always insisted on wearing, slowly devouring her corpse while a confused owl pecked at her, trying to get her cold hands to take his stupid, embarrassing letter. 
Ominis took a deep, steadying breath in an attempt to squash the slowly rising dread.
Stop it. She was  fine, she had other things to do, or she thought she was in trouble with him again and didn’t feel like being chastised and insulted all evening. It was annoying that she didn’t even want to find out what he wanted from her- nothing, really, except perhaps a chance to clear the air- but he had no right to complain, he was the one who messed things up.
And his annoyance was merely a way to mask his fear of rejection.
He slumped down, his forehead hitting the table with a soft thud. Ears filled with the sounds of soft footsteps, turned pages and scratching quills, ink from his quill staining his fingertips but nothing to really occupy his mind in her stead.
Why couldn’t he have spent a few more minutes to rewrite that letter, although one could barely call it a letter- the note, why couldn’t he have tried to sound a bit more friendly and inviting? Then again, even a second longer might have caused him to rethink the whole thing, keeping him from sending it at all.
All things considered, that would have been a blessing in disguise, saving him from making an absolute fool of himself.
He’d heard it countless times from the Sallow twins, trying to console him in his moments of self-doubt; that he was a good person, a good friend, that he was fun to be with, but it’s not like she’d ever seen that side of him.
The two of them would make an odd, unlikely combination, but he wanted to get to know her, be near her. His invitation had been a final act of desperation- or perhaps insanity- a desire to hold on to the strange but comforting, tender feeling that rose in his chest whenever he heard her voice in class or her footsteps in the hallways nowadays.
At the very least, he wanted to make sure there was no lingering resentment between them.
The library door opened again, and the next sound to reach his ears suddenly made his head feel blissfully empty. 
It was her voice, and he instantly straightened his back and cocked his head to the side to listen better as she greeted the librarian.
She made her way through the library, with eager steps, drawing closer until he could smell her signature scent, then until he could hear her breathing. Ominis noticed she was slightly out of breath.
Had she been in a hurry?
To meet him?
In spite of the confusion, the sick feeling inside him dissolved almost instantly, all thoughts of why she made him wait only to show up hours later forgotten. She cared. She cared at least enough to give him a bit of her time.
“Hello, Ominis,” she said.
He knew she wasn’t one for formalities, calling all of her classmates by their first name without invitation. 
What surprised him more was the lack of any bitterness or trepidation he’d expected to hear in her voice, instead, she sounded cheerful, excited, almost.
“There you are. Care to sit down?” he replied, trying his best to sound unbothered while ignoring the sudden flutter of nervousness in his stomach. The scraping of the chair from across the table told him she did.
“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting, I’m really sorry.”
Are you?
She sounded genuinely apologetic. Suddenly he realised, with another bout of nerves, that this would be the first time they actually had a proper conversation. Without any shouting. She was here for no other reason than to spend time with him, and more importantly, because he asked her to.
Ominis took perhaps a bit too long to answer, but she didn’t seem to notice. It sounded like she was busy taking her textbooks out.
“It’s all right. It’s not like I was just wasting time waiting for you, I was quite busy.” It was almost not a ridiculous lie, considering he’d been busy indeed, desperately craving her company, making a mess of his homework, hoping she’d care enough to show up. He hoped she wouldn’t think too hard about the messy, half empty parchments littering the table. 
It wouldn’t be fair to be upset about it. After all, he invited her on short notice and they never agreed on a time to meet.
“I left as soon as I got your owl, but it took me a while to get here,” she sighed, casually pushing aside his mess on the table to make space for her own.
Why? Where have you been?
Obviously not on school grounds.
“Why would that be?” he said, trying his best to sound nonchalant.
“I was near Aranshire.”
“Aranshire? What were you up to over there?” He raised his eyebrow. He knew it was one of the Hamlets, the one close to Hogsmeade station, if he wasn’t mistaken, but he couldn’t judge exactly how far away from the castle it was.
Oh, he had a bad feeling about this, and she, ever so perceptive, noticed.
“Nothing to be concerned about.” she said airily.
She doesn’t trust me.
Ominis knew he shouldn’t hold it against her. They barely knew each other, after all, and yet he couldn’t help the tiny stab of annoyance as she was lying to him yet again. If it had been Sebastian, she would have told him. 
Then again, Sebastian had never threatened to get her in trouble with the Headmaster.
“Anyway, on my way back something came up and I looked a bit dishevelled by the end of it, and it took me a while to sort that out. That’s why I’m late. I really am sorry.”
“You looked… dishevelled?”
She hummed in agreement, taking a moment to shuffle around pieces of parchment before answering properly. “Just a bit.”
“You do know I wouldn’t be able to tell,” he said with a smirk.
She laughed, and Ominis was almost disturbed by how much he liked the sound of it.
“Fair enough, I suppose, but others would, and I wouldn‘t want to give anyone a reason to stare, or… talk more about me than they already do.”
Ominis tensed. He’d always been aware and annoyed at how much the entire school seemed to gossip about her, but he’d never considered that she’d know, or how she felt about it. There was an odd sort of undertone in her voice.
He wondered yet again how much she knew, or guessed, about the things others said behind his back, when they thought he was out of earshot, always underestimating his hearing. They were careful when Sebastian was close, but they had no reason to hold back when it was just her.
So was she concerned about what the others might say if they saw them together? For her sake, or for his? He was beginning to feel sick again.
“Why did you look ‘a bit dishevelled’ in the first place?” he asked in an attempt to return to the original subject, and perhaps lighten the mood a bit.
“Well…” she hesitated for a moment. “I had a run in with some spiders.”
Oh no.
“Really, nothing to be concerned about.” She added quickly when he furrowed his brow and opened his mouth to say something.
If he had to guess, this wasn’t the first time something like that had happened- in fact he knew it wasn’t. Dragons, Trolls, Dark Wizards, now this- and Merlin knew what else in between. She almost seemed to enjoy it, always roaming around, curious to see what else she could take on.
That recklessness made him uneasy. He had spent the last four years with another one like that, and the two of them being best friends felt like pouring oil in a fire.
“Are you all right?”
“Of course I am. Nothing a bath and a Wiggenweld potion couldn’t fix,” she reassured him.
So you did get hurt.
Ominis frowned. He couldn’t smell any blood, and didn’t hear any strange whispers when she came in. She also didn’t sound as if she was in any pain, so she most likely wasn’t lying when she said she was fine now. Her having just taken a bath also explained why the scent of her soap was slightly stronger than usual and not mixed with the earthy, piney smell of the forest that always clung to her when she’d been roaming around the highlands.
“Are you all right?” she asked suddenly.
The question caught Ominis by surprise. “Certainly. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“You seem a bit tense. If there’s anything I can help you with…”
Even without sight, he could guess she was pausing to look at him expectantly. Merlin, did she think that’s why he asked her to meet him?
“No, I…” There were a lot of things he would have liked to say to her, and yet he couldn’t seem to find the right words.
He had to say something, though, because the silence between them as she waited for Ominis to finish his sentence was starting to feel oppressive.
“I’m fine,” he finally said, suddenly feeling self-conscious about how much he was stressing over what, to her, was a casual conversation she had with dozens of others on an average day.
For Merlin’s sake, they were classmates sitting in the library, making smalltalk.
Time to change the subject.
“Really though, what were you doing out there?” He tried his luck again.
“Just the usual.”
Ominis barely managed to suppress a frustrated sigh. “Which would be…?”
She seemed to consider him for a moment. The building frustration from her annoyingly vague answers must have been evident, and Ominis thought for a split second that he’d pushed too far.
“Nothing too exciting. Chatting to some of the locals. Looking for good spots to collect potion ingredients, that sort of thing.”
“Sharp must be very proud of you.”
She laughed that melodic, infuriatingly infectious laugh of hers, and Ominis was both relieved and grateful that the atmosphere lightened considerably again, even as the annoying git who shushed him earlier made a disapproving noise. If she’d heard it, she’d decided to ignore it, and Ominis was more than happy to follow her lead.
“I’m not doing it to please Professor Sharp, I quite enjoy potion making- unlike some of us,” she teased.
“I don’t-“
“Don’t bother denying it, it’s not like I’m imagining the sour look on your face every time I look at you during Potions.”
So she hadn’t been ignoring him, even after everything that had happened. His insides squirmed pleasantly. Perhaps she was still curious about him, after all.
Ominis cleared his throat.
“So, had any success in finding those potion ingredients?” he asked, awkwardly attempting to keep the conversation going.
“Hmm. I’m running out of Horklump juice, but there weren’t any around. I did find some Ashwinder eggs though, at an abandoned poacher camp nearby,” she rambled on absentmindedly, still shuffling around her pieces of parchment. “I’ve always been curious about them, you know. I’d like to see one someday.”
“I wouldn’t recommend it. They’re dangerous criminals, you know.”
She held back a laugh. “I meant an Ashwinder- as in the creature, not the poachers. I’ve seen quite enough of them.” 
“...it was a joke.”
She giggled. “I’ve been thinking about how I always collect their eggs as potion ingredients, but I’ve never actually seen one,” she mused.
Well, they weren’t exactly the sociable sort, even for snakes.
Ominis had met an Ashwinder once, in the gardens behind his family home, after it had slithered out of an abandoned fire his older brother had been playing around with before he’d wandered off, bored. Excited to have someone to talk to, someone who he’d hoped wouldn’t either dismiss him or use the opportunity for some casual cruelty, Ominis had bent down to greet the little snake. It had told him to sod off and slithered away to lay its eggs. Back then, he’d been sulking the whole day over it.
The corners of his lips twitched upwards.
Shame, he thought ruefully. There he actually had a somewhat funny story about the very thing she was interested in, and he couldn’t even tell her. Not without revealing secrets about himself that he’d rather keep tightly guarded.
“Have you ever heard one?” She inquired.
Ominis stiffened instantly. So much for his tightly guarded secrets. He really would have to wring Sebastian’s neck one of these days. “What do you mean by that?”
“I only meant, well…,” she answered sheepishly, “… you obviously wouldn’t have seen one, and I know you have good hearing. Sorry, did I say something wrong?” She was obviously taken aback.
“No, of course not. I’m sorry.” He relaxed. So Sebastian hadn’t told her that, at least. He cleared his throat. “You would have to be lucky to see one. They are born from unattended magical fires and only live for about an hour, barely long enough to lay their eggs.”
“Ah.” She was fumbling with her quill, running her fingers along the feathered edges, from the sound of it, seemingly deep in thought, and thankfully not angry at him for snapping at her. “If they’re born from fires, what are they laying eggs for?”
“I think that’s a question better asked of Professor Howin,” Ominis replied. “You’re the one taking Beasts class, not me.”
“So… could I just make a fire somewhere, ‘unattend’ it and wait for one to come out?”
He gave her an amused snort, not sure if she was being serious. “Are you taking a page out of Peeve’s book, trying to burn down the castle?” Brows furrowed, he still flashed her a warm smile as she had a fit of giggles, and a pleasant warmth spread through his body.
“Perhaps I should take a page out of Peeve’s book, that’d make us even,” she said.
Ominis was waiting for her to explain that rather puzzling statement, but she didn’t.
“Meaning…?”
“Never mind.”
He brushed it off. This was all he’d wanted, sitting together, having a pleasant conversation, laughing about each other’s jokes. And yet it didn’t feel quite right, there was still a wall between them, made up of secrecy and lies.
She finally seemed to have started on her work, the scratching of her quill adding to the symphony of the rustling paper and soft hums and whispers surrounding them.
Apologise for yelling at her about the Undercroft.
Ominis wanted to, he really did, and if he was ever going to, now was the time- but he was still embarrassed just thinking about it and he didn’t want to ruin their first decent conversation by reminding her of how horrible he’d been. It might have been easier to talk about if she was the one to bring it up, and he quietly wondered why she didn’t.
Through the ambient sounds, he heard Madam Scribner get up from behind her desk, about to make a final pass through her sacred halls. Reminding students not to leave a mess, picking unwilling volunteers to tidy the mess of the ones who didn’t listen amongst the stragglers who couldn’t flee fast enough, he was almost tempted to make sure it’d be the two of them.
It wouldn’t be fair, though.
Based on her account of how she’d spent her evening so far and his own idle contemplations, they’d both need to dedicate the remaining hours of the day to schoolwork, and she’d already dropped her previous plans as soon as she received his owl- a courtesy far beyond anything he deserved.
They were out of time.
“We should probably leave.”
There she was, slipping through his fingers again. If only she’d arrived half an hour earlier, maybe he could have gathered his nerve and apologised, at least.
“Wait, weren’t we going to do our homework? I haven’t even started, to be honest.”
Ominis smirked. “The library is about to close, you know. I’ve been here for hours before you came in.” Not that he’d been very productive in that time.
“Oh.” She sounded defeated- and perhaps even a bit disappointed?
That might have been wishful thinking on his part.
“I guess I’ll head back to the common room then. If I’m lucky, Adelaide’s still up and I can copy from her.”
He let out a small chuckle. “Cheating on our assignments, are we?”
“Oh, well. I can’t always be a saint,” she said cheekily.
For a second, Ominis had the urge to walk her back to her common room, but he couldn’t bring himself to ask her. It felt like it would be too much, walking around the castle with her, giving others the opportunity to make assumptions about a relationship that he himself didn’t yet fully understand. 
“Well, don’t let me keep you,” he said instead. He gathered his things, ignoring the growing regret and guilt.
“See you, Ominis. And… if you enjoyed my company enough, perhaps we could do this again?”
He felt his cheeks grow hot. “Sure.”
She laughed. “Cheers.”
And just like that, she was gone.
Her scent and her laughter still lingered and he was left wondering what, if anything, this little get together had accomplished.
Ominis could not have known this would be their last proper conversation before the three of them entered the Scriptorium.
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more a/n: Before the Scriptorium though, the next chapter will be a little trip down memory lane, featuring the earful Sebastian got for showing her the Undercroft. It’s finally here! I started working on this a while ago, so if you’ve read this far, thank you! Like I kind of hinted at in the beginning, the concept of this fic is basically “what could they have been up to ‘off-screen’, if canon events stay exactly the same” (up to and including the fact that no one ever mentions mc’s name, we’ll see if I live to regret this decision), and I don’t know if that’s interesting to anyone but myself, but I’d be happy if anyone wants to be along for the ride.  Writing from Ominis’ pov is a challenge and I try my best to keep in mind that he’s blind when describing things (so don’t expect visual descriptions of anything, ever), but hopefully without constantly drawing attention to it, I hope I managed to do that respectfully and realistically. That said, if anything feels off to you or you have questions, feel free to let me know. And finally, English is not my first language. I proofread and edit everything I write to hell and back but if I still misspelt anything or obviously misused a word, let me know so I can fix it (just be nice about it). There’s a lot more I wanted to put in the authors’ notes but I think it’s already rambly enough, so I’ll leave it at that. Until next time? (I’ve written a few chapters ahead and I’ll try to upload regularly, but realistically, I probably won’t manage it more frequently than once every 1.5 to 2 weeks)
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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 2 years ago
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Just for fun ✨🌸
Summary; Eddie only fucks you for fun, you're just an outlet for him or so you think. You're proven wrong.
Warnings; Minors dni, 18+, bit of angst,smut.
❤️ Wrote this quickly last night, I apologise if it has any spelling mistakes, etc ❤️
I don't give anyone permission to copy, reuse or repost my work.✨❤️
❤️
Eddie comes over to yours for sex, its a rough and passionate like every other time he comes to see you.
He does this a lot, usually every night if he can or he sneaks you into his trailer when his uncle is at work.
It doesn't matter that he has a girlfriend he says, her pussy doesn't clench around my dick like yours, he tells you, in fact they rarely have much sex at all.
They have an open relationship he tells you one night while your sated in his arms and he's just about to leave.
"I can't get enough of you sweetheart, you feel so fucking good"
He's using you and you know it but he makes you feel so good, even though your heart aches for something more.
Something you know you won't ever get. So you put a smile on your face and pretend everything is okay because it is. You're fine with this being all you are.
Totally fine.
❤️
Derek asks you out, he's a co-worker of yours, since you and Eddie are just a sex you figure that fine.
Plus he has... Whatever the hell is going on with Chrissy so you figure you can have someone too.
Derek is nice, polite, helpful and kind. When Eddie knocks at your door that night because you haven't shown up for your time with him, it's your mother that answers as she has brought around a casserole dish for you.
"Honey, Eddie is here" she knows Eddie, everyone knows Eddie in this town due to his reputation, the don't fuck with me attitude that you know hides a soft side.
It exists, you've seen it. Even if Eddie doesn't like to admit it.
"You're late" he whispers to you as you smooth down your dress, his eyes darken deliciously as his takes in your outfit.
"I'm not late, I wasn't coming. I have a date tonight" his expression mirrors shock, then something else, something you can't place.
"Why am I just hearing of this now?" he growls and you give him an annoyed look.
"His name is Derek, I don't know why you're so bothered. You have Chrissy don't you? why can't I have someone?"
His eyes flash, he's about to say something when Derek shows up to the door, with flowers.
You turn to Eddie and say to him quietly.
"I have feelings Eddie, I'm not just some sex toy for you to use when you feel like it" your eyes shine with tears and you blink them away quickly then turn to Derek smiling and take his arm heading outside.
❤️
The date is nice. Shit there's that word again, nice. Derek is lovely but there's no spark no matter how much you want there to be.
Eddie ends up at the Diner that Derek takes you to and you can practically feel his eyes burn holes into you Derek, he's tense and barely pays attention to what his friend says.
You sigh having enough of his jealousy? Or whatever is wrong with him and ask Derek to take you home.
He gives you a kiss when he takes you home and it's chaste and sweet, both of you however seem to realise that there's no heat between the two of you.
With a quick good night you're back in your house and relief washes over you. With no time at all you strip down to your underwear, wipe of the small bit of make up you have on and get changed into your pjs.
Just as you are about to relax you hear a knock on your door and answer it. You know it will be Eddie.
He comes in, his hair in a messy bun, stubble coating his jaw, eyes still full of irritation. He looks sexy as hell if you're being honest.
"How was your date?" you roll your eyes at the obvious jealousy emenating from him.
"Oh, fine. He fucked me then left. You just missed him" you say sarcastically and if it's possible Eddie's brown eyes darken even more.
"I'm kidding" you tell him and he takes off his jacket.
"Don't, I... I can't stand the thought of you with anyone else" you raise an eyebrow and walk towards him.
"Why? Why are you so jealous?" he doesn't even deny that he is.
"Because you're mine" he murmurs then kisses you, it's not long before he has you up in your bedroom and on your bed fucking into you.
His lips and teeth tease over you breasts, your neck as he thrusts into you powerful. The pleasure is so unreal, so intense that you come fast, clenching around him and crying out his name.
"You think that asshole could pleasure you like this huh?" he asks you and you shake your head as his lips press to yours.
"You're mine" he groans out and you agree with him, on the edge of your second orgasm, it's so close and Eddie's movements grow more erratic and he soon finds his relief and he comes, spilling into you.
His guttural groans fade into a soft moan as he kisses over your cheeks, then to your mouth. It's gentle, tender.
"You have Chrissy" you say softly and it makes your heart tug painfully.
He shakes his head. "No. We're done. For good. It happened a few nights ago. Tried to tell you but you've been a little bit awol princess". Oh.
He strokes your hair as he continues speaking.
"Chrissy and I are much, much better as friends sweetheart, just friends, much better. We both agreed with that and she's met a guy called Danny, he's a great dude".
"What does it make us, I don't want to share you with anyone Eddie?" he turns to you, kissing you softly, his eyes intent on yours.
"You are mine, only mine. I don't share you ever, I don't want to be with anyone else. I'm yours, only yours"
You liked the sound of that very much.
❤️
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uchihaharlot · 7 months ago
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Hello there, i really love your headcanons tbh maybe the realest ones here
Since I'm here its obvious im in Uchiha hell so,
Could I politely ask for uchihas turn ons and turn offs? I swear to god when i think about them horny it brings a tear to my eye from blissfulness
The realest ones? Nonny, you honor me to the highest degree and I am forever grateful you feel this way. ❤️🥹
I think a better question would be what doesn’t turn these men off (I also think I answered this differently than you might have wanted, I hope not though). 😮‍💨😌 Though none of these men are shallow individuals, so rest assured, anyone would be their type.
Semi-NSFW; just some things that make an Uchiha melt inside
Madara:
All natural women. I’m gonna be honest here; in Madara’s time, the more rounded a woman. The better (for breeding). But in all honesty, he appreciates all shapes and sizes.
His turn off is weakness, she needs to be confident. Which sounds callous, but if she’s not at minimum as much a firecracker as he is. The chemistry is off. Madara needs someone who is going to keep him on his feet with excitement, not someone who will make him second guess their intentions. The more outgoing and confident. The better.
If Madara’s laying her in his bed, she’s going to have to be a very patient woman. This man can go for hours, and a woman who can appreciate his stamina without complaint is high on his priority list, possibly good for breeding. Madara needs to fuck her this way, ok? A test drive so to speak. It’s just how he does it, raw and unadulterated lust. He also won’t tolerate a quickie like some men.
Obito:
Its no secret that Obi, bless his soul, is the black sheep Uchiha. The quiet ones are easier for him to talk to, not because they’re touch starved or anything. But because they are legitimately sweet and soulful. A woman who is confident won’t really make him feel nervous. But what he really wants is to kinda be taken care of, tenderly.
He definitely doesn’t like loud noises or sudden changes, so the more ground and constant, the better. So a woman who has a temper, is not for him. He might get riled with a little spice, but Obito definitely doesn't and won't be a push over, even he has his limits. Obito thrives in a static environment where he can make mistakes without being treated like a child, even better if she babies him a little. I'm sure there is a mommy kink somewhere to explore.
And in bed, he’s a total mess for her, does whatever she wants. If she wants to be treated like a pillow princess and owned, he'll be man enough for it. If she wants to make him beg underneath her, that too.
Shisui:
Shisui 🥹🔥 he’s so fiery!! Definitely is turned on by a woman who is into self care. Bonus points if she agrees to partner stretch with him, it's so hot being able to feel her this way and not sexually...yet. Someone who eats well, the occasional bad food here or there isn’t a problem, but damn if she’s into good diet and exercise, sign him up and don't forget, sparring is like foreplay for him. So, if she ends up pinning him down (like he planned all along), he’s gonna be so desperate for her. And she has to be loyal; to him, to the village and morality.
As for in bed? Their chemistry is so far off the charts, neither one can keep from switching positions. I really think Shisui is one of those men, like most Uchiha but on a different level even to his family, that can go for hours. Just because he can and because he likes to see her all fucked out, it's different from her usual mouthy self, which reminds me. She needs to be just as spunky and spontaneous as he, maybe not on the same level, but a woman who is down for whatever is the best kind of medicine. Especially for a man with the whole village on his shoulders.
Itachi:
I love him, he's such an old soul. They say opposites an attract and while I think he would like someone like himself, I also feel like someone who could keep him on his toes a little. If she's a scholar, this is perfect. Itachi would really enjoy someone who he can discuss world politics with. Not too in-depth, but casually. That level of self awareness the sharingan gifts them with can often leave many Uchiha feeling mismatched, but someone who has wits to his is a godsend.
As for in the sheets, Itachi is someone who is very reserved when it comes to matters of the flesh. Trust and sex go hand in hand, he's not like Shisui who can stick it anywhere, pretty quickly too, (he once told Itachi he used a spaghetti squash as a fleshlight). Trust is earned, gained and has to be absolute. Once this is accomplished, he's so damn tender. The softest moaner, but he does it right in your ear. Hearing and seeing you enjoy sex with him is what ends up getting him going harder. Even better if you speak your desires as he rearranges your insides. As time goes on, you learn what a closeted freak he really is and end up in the false atmosphere of his Tsukuyomi.
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itsgrimeytime · 1 year ago
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show me || Rick Grimes (TWD)
rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax @mgparker
AVAILABLE ON AO3
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dialogue prompts: “Why are you mad?” “I’m not mad, I just think you can choose better people to kiss.” (2) + “Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t feel the same as I do, then I’ll leave you alone.”  (36) + “I’m tired of being on the sidelines.”  (43)
Summary: You and Rick had something, you weren't quite sure what it was. After a few drunken mistakes during one of the dinner parties at Alexandria, Rick wants to make things crystal clear.
TWS: TENSION, blood, gore, gun violence (violence in general), alcohol, drunkness, drunken kisses, kind of dark!Rick, jealousy, possessiveness, protectiveness, all things consistent with TWD.
[[A/N: The vibes are in with this one, girlies. Kind of listened to Boyfriend by Dove Cameron for this one. SO... Be ready for that. Thanks for reading!!! ]]
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Your head hurt after the night before, you couldn't quite remember why. Well, other than the drinks.
It had been the first dinner party after Alexandria, you were nervous and just kept sipping. Somebody kept giving you more, even though, you remember distinctly Rick (big hands and blue, blue eyes) warding them off. They continued when he wasn't by your side -beer after beer and maybe something... else? You couldn't really remember.
You gathered pretty quickly that Rick was mad at you that day, something about the way he composed himself -the steaming rage enveloping him, and it only continued for days.
Day after day, and nothing. Usually, you could read him like a book, but now, all you got was well, that he was mad at you. Not even to get you started on the way everyone else was distinctively ignoring your questions like Rick had told them to.
So, you stepped out of your comfort zone -you went straight to the most honest Alexandrian you knew. Or the one who would speak to you over Rick's head -Deanna.
There was something deep in your chest that told you somehow this was betrayal, but you had been driven far past that point. (One blue-eyed glare and complete head turn to ignore you past that point.)
"Hey," you spoke, a little uneasy.
"Hello, Y/N!" she smiled, big and bright, "-I'm glad to see that dinner has been going so well-"
"That's actually what I was here to talk to you about," you echoed, direct in your tone, "-last dinner party, I... I don't remember what happened."
"Nothing bad, I can assure you," she hummed, continuing to walk down the street, "-I'm well aware of anyone overstepping."
"Right, well, I'm glad, but-" you spoke, a little impatiently -eyes darting around, "-I don't remember."
"Nothing wrong with getting a little drunk," she spoke, something in her shifting, "-we understand the change is-"
"Deanna," you interrupted with finality, "-please, just tell me what happened."
She paused in her steps, turning around to fully face you -head on, and something in you shrunk at her inquisitive gaze. She looked at you a bit like a puzzle for a moment, before her eyes seemed to light up in understanding like she knew exactly what the issue was.
"Let's..." she began, slowly, "-Let's talk inside, shall we?"
You merely followed her up the steps and into her house, like a sheep to its shepherd -you were desperate. If she could help, you would just about do anything.
"I was wondering just what was with him," Deanna muttered to herself, "-makes so much sense now."
She led you to her living room, where the room was much the same in her own home, but she had photos -framed and set pristinely of faces you didn't quite know. Ones you doubted you ever would.
"Sit," she motioned, "-we have much to discuss."
"Much?" you questioned.
"Well, no, it's-" she started, but faltered for a moment, "-rather complicated."
"Complicated?" you questioned further, raising your voice.
"Look, I'm going to just tell you to avoid any further confusion. You kissed someone, can't remember who now-"
You paused, faltering for a minute, "That's it?"
"Rick saw," she finished as if it was some big reveal.
You and Rick had a thing, a very slight thing that neither of you had really even commented on or talked about. Hell, you hadn't even kissed the guy, but there was something there, a deep buzz under your skin. And something in the apocalypse was something, sure, but not if he didn't talk to you about it. Not if he-
You stopped your train of thought, "So?"
"Aren't you-" she seemed to pause, being taken off guard, "-Aren't the two of you together?"
"I'm sorry?" you asked, "-No, we're not... not really. He doesn't- It doesn't matter, drunkenly kissing a guy is no reason to get this pissy."
"It is if you're together."
"Deanna," you started, "-don't push your luck. Look, I have to go sort this out, do you-"
"Oh, no, please," she answered, quickly, "-I can't get a word in with the man right now. Fix it, go."
That's how you wound up here, ready at his door -he couldn't ignore you at his own home. You'd get him to listen.
"Rick," you addressed, direct as soon as the door opened and you saw the blue of his eyes, "-hey."
He seemed to still at your voice -frozen for a moment, before wordlessly moving around the kitchen. He was gathering up dishes, at a sure pace before, but now he'd begun much faster. As if he was trying to get away from you.
"Alright, enough-" you said, waltzing up to him, and turning his face to yours, "-why are you mad?"
Rick looked at you for a moment, and something in you almost grew shy at the attentiveness. Blue eyes dashing along your face like you were fresh water and he had been stranded in the desert.
And then, he stopped. Lifting his soapy hands to take yours off his face -a slow, gentle movement. The opposite of someone mad, you noted.
"Do we need to talk 'bout this?" He echoed, a little helplessly if you were honest.
"I don't know," you answered, "-you tell me. Can you not be mad if we don't talk about this?"
"I'm not," he sighed, turning back to the dishes -this time doing them leisurely, "-I'm not mad. I just..."
"You just what?" You asked, pointedly.
"I just think you can choose better people to kiss," he grumbled out so low you weren't even sure you'd heard him correctly.
But something in you fired off like a rocket.
"Seriously?!" You yelled out, a sort of toned frustrated yell, but still a yell, "-you are pissed because you don't approve?"
"That's not-"
"Well, I got good news for ya, Sheriff, I don't even remember who I kissed last night-"
"That's because he made ya so drunk-"
"-And on top of that, I can kiss who I want, when I want. It's not like you have any control over that-"
"I want to," he grumbled out, even lower.
You stilled, "I'm sorry...?"
He didn't speak for a moment, washing the soap off his hands -you watched the water trail down to his elbow. Scrubbing away at the dish towel, he dried them and turned to face you.
Rick's steps were slow and sure, you could hear the clink of the tile under his boot. And your heart started pounding with anticipation, maybe he was mad. Why was he getting so close-
He was just in front of you now, finger trailed under your chin, "Tell me to stop, if you don't want this."
You turned your head down to look at the tile, something in your breath catching that you could barely breathe. You just needed a second-
He flicked your eyes back to him, and you could feel his breaths on your lips, "Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel the same as I do, then I'll leave you alone."
"Rick-"
He raised an eyebrow, "I asked a question, Y/N."
"How do you feel?"
He roamed closer, eyes dashing between the two of yours and your lips, "I think you know, sweetheart."
You opened your mouth.
"But," he interrupted, "-if ya insist."
Rick pulled back slightly, hand leaving its trail to, instead, hold your wrists -gently, as his thumbs rubbed into your wrists. With another breath, he kissed your palms -pressing his lips there ever so slightly.
"I'm tired of being on the sidelines," he spoke, low and soft, "-I... I want it to be us. Together."
"Together?" You echoed.
"Like you stay in my house, you sleep in my bed, we go to dinners together instead of so... so far apart-"
"And you can tell me who to kiss?" You added, playfully.
"And I'm the only one you can kiss," he corrected with the smallest of grins, but there was something hard in his eyes. Something serious.
"So," you spoke, expectantly, "-kiss me then. So, I can see what I'm stuck with."
"Stuck?" He laughed, slowly leaning in, "-Oh darlin' you're gonna be far from stuck."
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