#But part of what I want to express is that DJing is kind of a fundamentally intuitive process IMO

[noisytenant]

ive been wanting to compile some kind of djing guide for a while, not so much a "how to" as a "what i think about/do" thing, for people but i feel like i dont necessarily have the qualifications. but i think if im explicit about the fact that im kinda just figuring it out, it'll be good for beginners maybe.

[semimedieval]

the beach part 10: this shit is bananas

In classic RPG mode, the suggestion of a fairly tame plot development is met by a chorus of characters expressing their thoughts on it.

"This calls for a party!" Spark yelled. "What..." Chuji said with a dreading look on her face. "A party?" Obsidian said. "COOL!" Tozi said happily Ky was skeptical, but gave in. "Okay, sure!" "But first you might want to change," Quartz added, looking down at Tozi's bloody clothes. Tozi looked down. "Ha ha... yup." "Not to be mean, of course," she quickly added.

God bless you, Quartz, you are not being mean, you are being eminently reasonable. Chuji's first reaction to Tozi's revival being "ugh, I don't want to have a party" would be kind of interesting if it ever went anywhere. Tozi runs off to take a bath, there's some lame dialogue about DJing and CD players and how Lupus only knows the waltz and doesn't want to dance with Ky to in the club by 50 cent or whatever which is a clear sign of bad taste. It's funny that Lupus having a clear comfort zone about what 'kind' of dancing he is raised to do is a point of continuity between the OG RP and 3.0. The Party Rock Anthem sadly didn't make it all the way to 3.0, but you take your parallels where you can get them.

Obsidian reacts normally to the dancing.

Obsidia pressed himself into a corner. DRAGONODSESSED: *Obsidian. Wow, Obsidian sounds like a genderbended Obsidian. Scary thought.

I think transgender Obsidian is an awesome thought, actually. Don't be such a hater. Chuji speaks some Google Translated Japanese, which is goofy, and Spark, Lupus, and Quartz get out on the dance floor. In response to Spark and Chuji dropping a bunch of Google Translate, we break out the fucking classic cartoon stand-in for alcohol:

"Spark! Where'd you get sugary drinks!" Quartz called. Spark pointed to a pile of empty cans that read "EnergyEnergySugarlishish (Not for human consumption)"

I think it's so funny the way Quartz and Spark start out as decidedly not stand-ins for 2012 era Katia and Jack as they saw themselves but inevitably become that anyway, only to then be stand-ins for 2015 Katia and Jack as I saw us, only to then... not be that anymore.

Obsidian stays kind of lame but in a way that makes me smile. They should dance together in the 3.0 version of this dance too, which should of course be a midsummer celebration. Parallels with the two of them not dancing at the last one :) Maybe Augustine and I were healing our school dance trauma by doing this? God, it would only be a couple more months before we functionally reenacted this scene at the 2013 spring dance. Sorry, had to divert myself into another tab to make a text post on main about Adele.

Obsidian finally got out of the corner and stood at the edge of the floor, watching the dancers. Chuji sudenlly ran up behind him and pushed him in Obsidian stumbled forward then regained balance and turned around to face her. "Hey!" Chuji laughed "Come On!" (Uhhhh what do I do?) she grabbed his hand (Uhmmm I dunno) a started dancing (-_(\) He moved jerkily and stiffly, but forced a smile nevertheless. Soon his face muscles relax. Dancing was awful, but Chuji could cancel it out and leave plenty left over. (wut?)

He's so silly. Meanwhile, a moment of life-affirming joy from Tozi:

Tozi leaped onto the little platform and did the disco (Spoof Post: Two little girls saw them all dancing and ran away) Quartz looked up at him. It was so good to have him back. Tozi loved knowing that he was full and alive, he could be able say how happy he was and mean it truly

The narrative notes that "Obsidian had finally fallen into the rhythm and stopped dancing like an old man," which I have to admit makes me smile. Then Chuji leaves to sit on the beach, and there's a moment of silly bonding between Quartz and Obsidian. I like the idea of lingering in this moment of all-consuming love for her friends for 3.0 Quartz, only to parallel-episode it and other dancing scenes later at Leander and Mina's wedding.

And Quartz ran to Obsidian, took his hand, and spun him around gracefully. He looked taking aback. "Quartz!" Chuji nearly squealed as the chilled water rushed under her feet. "What!?" she yelled, then spun and hugged him. "Quartz" he yelled. 'What have you and Spark been drinking?" Tozi detached Quartz from Obsidian "Dance with me?" (Wuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut? Tozi u flirt) She grinned like a chimpanzee on drugs. "Sure!" Obsidian mouthed, 'thanks' at Tozi. Chuji tilted her head and tapped Obsidian's shoulder "Is it really that bad for you sister to hug you?" Tozi twirled Quartz in circles. "Yes... but not like that. Not so...dementedly. She's hyper." However, he found that he was smiling as he said it. Chuji smiled as well. "There's some really pretty things by the shore, do you want to look with me?"

Aw. Also, "Chimpanzee on drugs," bleh. 2012, sometimes I think I miss you, but I never actually do. Remembering this is vital.

Ky announces a couple's dance, but Chuji and Obsidian ditch the promise of it to walk on the beach, giving us our first glimpse into them since the date. Lupus and Ky really are falling behind, and that's nobody's fault but y own. By the ocean, they talk about their schooling and Chuji's loneliness growing up. It's a nice little picture. I care them despite it all.

Chuji smiled as they walked, and held his hand. Obsidian felt a spring increasing in his step. Chuji smiled and looked everywhere "Did you go to school?" "Yeah," he replied. "Me and Quartz both." "I see.... I was home-schooled." Her hand slipped away. "Oh. What was it like?" "Lonely," she shivered. "Aw." He looked into her eyes. "You had no siblings, I assume." "No..... Only trike dad and Tozi." He decided not to ask what had happened to the mom. "It's a good thing you had Tozi, then," he said softly. "I have YOU now." She 'nuzzled' his shoulder and relaxed. "I'm glad I have you." "So am I," he assured her, wrapping his arms around her. She buried her face in his shoulder, smelling his sweet tangerine shirt. "I love you more than anything."

Among all of the Generic Sweet RP Moments, which actually feel somewhat (somewhat) earned by way of That Fucking Date, there's a subtle and pleasant moment of Character Development (TM) – Obsidian tells Chuji "I'm glad you had Tozi," not as some kind of 4D chess self harm routine but just as a sincere and simple statement. "He's your friend, and he means a lot to you, and I'm glad he's back." It's nice. What's less nice is following this up with a 'Aaah! Quartz is spying!" moment. Lame as that is, I think it's given me the really belated epiphany that of course Katia-from-the-past sabotages moments of emotional/romantic intimacy with characters written by people they have some form of real interest in, however nebulous. Can't push your luck. You don't notice this kind of hesitation with Lupus/Ky – though you do, of course, note a general discomfort with writing romantic intimacy.

Thankfully, that doesn't last too long. What follows is several slightly overlapping romantic - or at least, potentially romantic - interactions . I'll discuss Spark and Tozi first.

Spark ventured out on her own. Tozi caught up. "Hey! It's Snow White without her prince." Spark looked at him. "Hmm?" "Hey..... It's a joke, I mean.... for Charlie.." Spark laughed. "Charlie IS an odd one." Tozi laughed awkwardly. "Soooooooooooo. What are you doing right now anyways, squid whisperer?" Tozi said and he then suddenly realized he was uncontiously flirting with Spark. Spark blushed and looked at him. "Taking a walk. BY MYSELF."

Love that, the moment Tozi's back, Spark is no longer pining miserably for Tozi's love but being a very 2010s #sassy #girl #character. And by 'love' I mean I think it's kind of hilarious, but certainly in an endearing way.

He smiled. "Not anymore." Spark put her hands on her hips. "I guess there's no arguing with you Tozi."

God bless, here come the only characters in AOTE (besides Leander) who know how to flirt like regular people. Solid enough argument for their marriage. Wow, I don't remember this conversation at all – I guess that's what happens when you don't include it in your novelization.

Spark walked along the beach, barefoot. The icy water washed over her feet. ".... this is awkward for you I figure....." Spark tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "What?" Nooooothhhhhiiiiiiing. Spark watched him as he looked away from her, blushing. She loved everything about him. Did he share the same feelings? She slowly slid her hand into his. Tozi looked at his other hand while tightening the other's grip on Spark's. A silence passed between them. She leaned against his strong shoulder as they walked.

Whoagh. I love Spark's go-getter status, honestly – bro has been back from the dead for maybe an hour and she's already making her moves. One of the few characters in this RP who knows what she wants. Still, I like the undercurrent of "is this even okay for us to want"

I've had a long absence for much of this Tozi/Spark exhange, but I come back to facilitate a sudden interjection from Chuji and Obsidian – 

Obsidian walked further down the beach with Chuji, and suddenly burst out, "Chuji!" As she turned to look at him, he faltered and looked down. Not sure what to say, he mumbled, "I...it's just that...you...um..." He wasn't sure what to say, how to let her know how necessary she was. "Something wrong, Obsidian?" Obsidian looked down. "It's just... You make my life happy." Chuji stayed a while and then smiled. "You too." her face softened. She kept walking. Obsidian followed her, feeling a weight lift off of his shoulders. That had needed to come out.

Then there's a very silly interjection in which I claim that a unicorn waded in the ocean far away, which is fucking dumb and I am not going to entertain it. There's a brief Lupus and Ky interjection, so that we are reminded of every couple permutation in this RP. It's funny – this part of the beach adventure is almost like "Yay, four girls and four boys, we've figured everything out!" Quartz should certainly feel resentful of that feeling, which exists both diegetically and extranarratively.

Ky ran up to Lupus and tackled him with her notorious bear hug. "Whoa, whoa!" he yelled, laughing and swinging her around.

Before, finally Quartz and Rim – 

Rim stared up into the sky. He lay on his back, absorbing the warmth in the sand, all that remained of the afternoons sun. The stars glimmered, ech of them a roaring ball of fire and light. He forced his mind to ignore all of the other thoughts of them, except one. They were amazing. The twinkling suns glimmered in his eyes, reflected, as if they had fallen from the sky and were resting on his eyes. (Just some weird Rim thoughts there) Rim began to feel a little drowsy. His midday sleep had been helpful for recovering his strength, but wasn't really helpful for keeping him awake.

I was expecting Quartz to sit down with him right after this, but Quartz is kind of frozen in time right now, conspicuously absent from a narrative that is suddenly all about young heterosexual love. Instead of all that, Rim swims out to catch the unicorn, which I maintain is lame as hell. Ky tells Lupus "Let's catch that unicorn!" which is still an iconic line. We learn that the Unicorn's name is Banana Cake III. This shit is bananas.

Moopy asks me "Do you have any specifics on how magic works in this world?" I really wish I had my answer, because I'd be fascinated by how I spun this, but the answer disappeared when the 2.0 update happened and Scratch got functional comment threads. Unicorn stuff aside, as well as an interlude where I dunk on Ky and Lupus unjustifiably and Jack defends them passionately, we finally get to Quartz and Rim. Sorry, no, Quartz and Ky. It's nice that there's a little moment between them – two characters who, as Quartz problematically acknowledges, barely talk.

Ky sat on the shore beside Quartz. "So, what's up?" Quartz questioned. She had never talked much to Ky. Ky leaned back and looked up at the midnight sky. "Nothing much, really. What's next for the extrani?" "I've no idea. But somehow I think that we'll pay for this outing." Ky laujghed. "What if Monoceros broke in? Or, or, unicorns are living in our house!" Quartz giggled. "Or if all our clothes were replaced with unicorn suits." Ky fell to the sand, laughing. She loved being care-free.

Ky loves being care-free so much that she runs off to play in the water with Lupus. Spark and Tozi smile at each other, Obsidian watches them and does the heterosexual "ah, i see the next couple destined to fall in love" thing, and – at long last – this very brief and understated moment happens. (As I've done before, I'm slightly rearranging posts for continuity) Quartz was by the ocean, feet in the water, and completely oblivious to Banana Cake. He saw her and smile a little at the fact that she was no longer hyped up. She picked up sand and let it flow through her fingers. Rim sat down next to quartz and pointed to a particularly bright star in the night sky. "Do you know what that is?" He asked her. She shrugged. "I don't really know much about stars," she admitted. "What?" "A supernova, an exploding star. We're pretty lucky to be able to see this with no telescope" He explained. Her eyes widened. "THat's amazing, that we can see it from here." He nodded. "It's huge though, and believe it or not, it actually exploded a while ago! That's how far it is, the light takes a while to reach us!" "Yeah, well, I suppose that even light needs to travel," she reasoned softly.

I'm literally – say it with me – joining the war on autism on the side of autism. This is just as precious as I remembered, and holds the same seeds of disparity between Quartz and Rim that I'm interested in exploring in their 3.0 incarnations. He's been to a lot of school, and she's been to very little. Quartz's love of learning outweighs her fear of feeling stupid, but that doesn't mean she likes feeling stupid.

He nodded, and opened his mouth to start a lecture on how light was photons and the light we can see is-but he shut it again, not everybody finished school by the age of twelve. "Yup" he said instead. "They aren't all stars, right?" she asked after a while. "Some are planets, some are the supernovas you mentioned..." Rim shook his head. "Most are stars, in fact, I very much doubt we could see planets that are outside our own solar system" He said poking her. "Planets inside our solar system," she specified. "That's what I meant."

Well, if he poked her, it must be love. I'd have been happy to hear more from them, but Jack rightfully brings up the fact that we should be time-skipping home, and Extranei Summer is formally over. Spark friendzones Tozi on the beach, as if realizing belatedly that maybe she should wait a little while while he's re-accustomed to daily life. This moment – fading out on the group, each heterosexually paired – is what I wrote up to and diverted from in 2.0, ending the scene instead on Quartz and Spark's kiss on the beach. How will I end it t his time around? I don't know. It sounds like I have some outlining to do, which is what I was hoping this RP would motivate me to do, so... mission accomplished. Much to think about. In 2.0, time skips forward and we miss Spark and Quartz's entire relationship. In 1.0, the pace moves onward without considering a new plotline, before staggering to a halt. We'll be here to see it happen, but for now, I'm going to consider doing something a little more constructive.

[naturalflow]

I had the gold one and this is the best way that I can explain art just as a general from of expression...

A child experiments with finger paint and Play-Doh because that's what makes sense for them, not only in it's form and color, but because they do not have the coordination to move beyond it...

Okay.

A skateboarder at a pro level will see a staircase and imagine a trick and commit to it, a person who is extremely good at skateboard with see the same staircase, but instead of open air trick, they might commit to hitting the rail... A casual skater might see the same staircase and only be able to Ollie or jump over the stairs. It all depends on not only their eye, how they envision the sport, but also their given ability level or what they want to push for for themselves..

Same staircase 3 outcomes. Technically to the beginner it's 4 because they can see it and dream it and it's still a part of their reality...

A person who grew up reading music might see music as notes on lines on a sheet of paper or as finger placements on a saxophone... That's orchestral stuff

A person who grew up experimenting with music might hear different instruments and effects, that's producing

a person who grew up in old school hip-hop might hear bits and pieces of the music or the drum beat and know that they can takes those bits and pieces and do something special with it... That's sampling and beat making

A person who who grew up listening to certain types of music might hear how songs could blend well or be played over top of each other which is DJing

A person might hear a song or beat or instrumental and get poetic over it, which is MCing and rapping

A person might hear lyrics and music from different songs and mix them which is kind of DJing but more like mashups...

Music is one thing, but there are many ways to see it, so different types of glasses and lenses.. and that's how everything works.. finger paint turns to watercolor and Play-Doh turns to clay... It's all the same, at different levels of perception and expression

[qnewsau]

Here's to more Trans Glamoré!

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/heres-to-more-trans-glamore/

Here's to more Trans Glamoré!

There aren’t many dedicated events for the trans community in Sydney but Victoria Anthony has been working hard to change that all year round.

Trans Glamoré is well recognised within Sydney’s queer nightlife scene as one of the most joyful and positive events the city has to offer.

It’s one of the only calendar events catered towards the transgender and gender-diverse community in Sydney that has remained consistent, with weekly shows at the Newtown Hotel and monthly events at Stonewall Hotel.

Especially during Mardi Gras, Trans Glamoré acts as a testament to the undeniable and powerful presence of trans people in Sydney’s LGBTQIA+ community.

The event was founded in 2017 by Victoria Anthony, one of Sydney’s most respected names as a DJ, and a prominent figure on Oxford Street.

In an exclusive interview with QNews, Victoria speaks to the importance of trans visibility in 2024 and what the event is all about.

What was your overall aim in creating Trans Glamoré?

I wanted to give trans performers a place where they could feel like they could express themselves and get into performing.

When I first started out, I didn’t really have anywhere that I could go where you could meet other trans people, or you could perform as a trans person.

It was very much like we had to be mixed in with the drag queens, which wasn’t a problem. I mean, that’s often been the way.

If we look at the history of Sydney and trans showgirls and performers, and drag queens, I think there’s definitely been a mix between the two.

But by the time I started my time doing shows and DJing, I felt like the space for trans performers had kind of disappeared in Sydney.

And so that’s why I thought I’d start Trans Glamoré.

I wanted to create a space where people could just meet other trans people and feel celebrated.

So often what I hear is about how hard life can be as a trans person. So I wanted Trans Glamoré to be something that was a celebration of being trans and living life.

I certainly don’t see myself as a pioneer in this. I know that there are a lot of other trans people who have been doing this before me, and because of them I am grateful that it was easier for me to be myself.

Why is having a trans event focused on joy and happiness important for our community?

Having a trans event that’s focused on joy and happiness gives trans people the opportunity to see themselves through other trans people, whether they’ve decided to start on their own journey or not.

They get to see other trans people being happy. I feel a lot of people don’t really get to see that they could be happy as trans, or you don’t get that visibility factor where you get to meet trans people all the time.

So, if you really did want to meet trans people, then you could come to Trans Glamoré, and see that it’s all OK.

You’d see that we’ve got amazing allies that support us. And it’s not just going to be something where we focus on bad things that happen in our lives, or other negative parts of our community, because I feel like that’s done a lot.

Everyone has difficult days, and at the start it definitely might feel harder.

But I also think it’s very important to have a night to just let loose and relax, have a drink and meet new people. And that’s really refreshing.

Yes, there’s a lot of work that needs to be done, but we have to play and have a good time.

Work hard, play hard, and that’s what Trans Glamoré is all about! To just enjoy yourself, celebrate who you are and meet new people. With allies and friends and family by our side.

Who were some of your inspirations for this event? Were there any figures in the scene that inspired you to create Trans Glamoré?

Maxi Shield used to run the entertainment at The Colombian hotel, and when one of those events stopped being hosted there, Maxi said I should do some sort of trans event. So that’s how this all started.

I feel like she really inspires me because I love her work ethic. I love everything that she does and she works really hard and she loves to try new things. So she gave me a chance to run this event.

I was also very much inspired by this venue called the Taxi Club, which existed for many years in Sydney, and it was definitely the main venue, or the watering hole, for all of the trans or gender diverse people to come out and party and meet people who admire us.

That had just closed down a few years before I started Trans Glamoré, so I felt like there was a space that was needed for this kind of event.

I used to watch videos of Carlotta and the Les Girls from the 70s and 80s online and I felt that had such a great vibe. So I thought that would be an amazing feeling to try to recreate.

And I’ve had the support of some of the people involved with Les Girls in performing in my show.

Colleen Windsor has done the show, Katherine Wolfgramme, Suzie St James, Linda Montana, Darlene… There are a lot of girls that used to do what I’m doing and I’m just trying to carry it forward.

Can you speak to the importance of trans visibility specifically in 2024?

The reality is there’s not a lot of trans people that are being visible so I just think there’s not enough visibility for us.

That’s why there are people who get upset when they see us up on stage because they can’t really relate to our journey, but they’re not thinking about the other people who can.

If it doesn’t affect them, then why stop us from having our own space? If they’re not going to give us that space, then I’ll create one.

We need some sort of visibility or how else are we going to grow? How are we going to educate people about us, and then show trans people in a different light?

Trans Glamoré is not just for trans women. It’s also for trans men and non-binary performers as well.

I definitely welcome trans men and non-binary people and if anyone reaches out to me, I’ll include them in the show.

I’m really amazed by some trans male performers. We’ve had Pink Lemonade perform, and a lot of non-binary performers as well. A lot of girls, Lyla Joy, Blueberry Bakla… just to name a few.

I think any visibility is good. Yes, I’m out there being who I am, but I don’t think every trans person can relate to how my journey is or how I like to do my transition and how I like to live my life.

People might just see the negative, but there’s a lot of love and positivity and joy about being trans and we can offer the world a lot if we’re given the opportunity.

-Trans Glamoré is held at Stonewall Hotel on the first Thursday of every month and at the Newtown Hotel every Thursday and will be performing at Hot Trans Summer on February 22 as part of Mardi Gras.

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[deepergrooves]

Surrealism - Exploring art through the unconscious

“The surrealist revolution has this incalculable advantage of bringing the irrational into everyday life and of having made unknown known to men the treasures of the unconscious…poetry thus has an end. The absolute liberation of man.” Malcolm de Chazal, 1960

I’ve been finding myself drawn to a lot of different surrealist art forms recently and wanted to join the dots and share my experience of what I have found in my short exploration of this fascinating, peculiar and sometimes unnerving world.

Engaging with "art"

Despite being a sensitive person by nature who generally appreciates and experiences things deeply, I sometimes find "art", purposely in inverted commas, difficult to engage with. There can be a palpable snobbishness and elitism around art which seems fundamentally at odds with the very concept of creativity, and many of the people who create it. I wanted to start off by saying that I look at art through a purely instinctive lens as somebody with no real background in the theory or history of art (beyond a brief introduction in secondary school!), but nonetheless I’ve had an urge to delve into this world and my early preference seems to be towards the surreal.

Looking at things through a Lynchian lens 

My appetite for what I’m starting to understand as surrealist art was triggered by an interest in David Lynch and his work. I was intrigued by an interview I heard with him where he spoke passionately about his creative process which was centred around Transcendental Meditation (TM) and going to the deepest parts of his psyche in service to creativity. He seemed fully committed to getting to the very core of his being to unearth the truest expression of what he called the ‘collective consciousness’ and express that through stories and symbols without compromise. 

In Lynch’s ground-breaking TV series Twin Peaks there is an odd but captivating sense of connection and meaning behind the dreamlike messages and symbols that drive the narrative of the show, sometimes speaking more directly and resonating more deeply than the actual dialogue or more traditional story arch. I was struck by the honesty and also the determination to touch on the darkest and strangest parts of a subject in order to tell the full unfiltered story through his work and this commitment to true expression has underpinned my own interest in other works of this kind. 

The importance of authenticity of spirit

This theme of authenticity also came through for me when watching The Radiant Child, a documentary on the life of Brooklyn born expressionist artist Jean-Michel Basquiat. I was equally inspired by Basquiat’s search for truth and his understanding of the burgeoning art scene around him and how this shaped his existence but didn’t compromise his integrity. He stuck to his artist principles no matter what and ironically in the long term this is what drew the more mainstream world of fine art to him. 

I felt a similar outlook from Craig Richards in his interview with Resident Advisor last month when he spoke about the process he follows when DJing and painting and how he just wants the very best and truest expression to come through. "Devotion is the main aim”. He seems to connect deeply with the culture but again as his own uncompromising self.

Further immersion and exposure to surrealism - Dali and other masters

So back to my own journey with surrealism. While making my way through Season 2 of Twin Peaks I noticed the Tate Modern museum was hosting an exhibition on surrealism so I marked it in my diary and went along last August. Not sure what to expect, I was most struck by art that wasn’t art. The surrealist movement felt inclusive in the way that anything can be considered art. The exhibition included doodles on train tickets and photographs of little skulls sat beside more traditional, albeit obscure, paintings as well as film loops of increasingly bizarre scenarios. Salvador Dali’s iconic lobster telephone sat front and centre connecting two seemingly unrelated objects in an attempt to trigger deeper meanings by warping traditional outlooks.       

Dali was the one name I had encountered before. I didn’t know why I knew him, but I knew him. Joining the Salvador Dali Surrealist World exhibition at the Chali-Rosso Art Gallery in Vancouver (https://www.eventbrite.ca/e/salvador-dalis-surreal-world-tickets-646654841037) last week I learned that this seems to have been part of his artist concept. He wanted to become famous and have himself become part of the performance. 

The free Dali exhibition was held in a tight, bright gallery near the top floor of a hotel at the waterfront near Canada Place and displayed some of his original drawings, painting, sculptures and etchings. It kicked off with a talk on Dali by the gallery host who gave a knowledgeable whistle stop tour of Dali’s life from his obsessive relationship with his wife (and his own moustache) to the motivation and meaning behind some of his most famous works on display which included his melting clock sculptures and his depiction of Dante's Divine Comedy trilogy which is now next on my book list.

Before moving on to that book series I need to finish another surrealist masterpiece, Flann O’Brien’s The Third Policeman, which brings readers through a weird and wonderful Alice in Wonderland style journey through rural Ireland using the philosophy of fictional psychologist De Selby to underpin the descent of a man into madness as he encounters a police officer who believes his colleagues and friends are turning into bicycles. 

The gallery also featured pieces by Picasso and Mr. Brainwash, the man profiled in Exit Through the Giftshop, a 2010 documentary that examines the commodification of graffiti by sharing the story of Thierry Guetta (aka Mr. Brainwash) and Banksy and bends the walls between reality and fiction by challenging viewers to decide if the documentary itself is real or imagined.

Eerie, unpredictable and inspiring

There is something uniquely imaginative and exciting about surrealism that I’m keen to explore both as an observer and in my own small way as a creator. I’ve tried to incorporate aspects of this in my mixes over the last year (check this one out) and want to expand this more widely having been inspired by David Lynch, Jean-Michel Basquiat, Salvador Dali, Craig Richards and Rick Rubin who in his new book ‘The Creative Act’ encourages everyone to be an artist.

Despite its obscurity, surrealism seems to be the artistic language that speaks to me most clearly for now.

[leonardhoee]

Ikevamp Boys In Vegas

Leonardo:

Ok Leo wouldn’t really be into the expensive nightlife part of Vegas. He’d probably like the old bars and pubs in downtown Vegas where all the original casinos are. He’d also like to explore the nearby mining ghost downs (Rhyolite Ghost Town). (He’d also take everyone to the ghost tours of those places at night). He would probably just wake up and leave the hotel and when all the others wake up they can’t find him but don’t really question it since they probably expected him to go off exploring on his own. He would also go to the Neon Graveyard and Madame Tussaud’s + any other cool art display with Vincent and Theo. He would take MC to the gondolas in the Venetian hotel. They would also go to the Ceaser’s Palace mall and just run around there for hours looking at different stores and get lost. He’d like the Avengers Exhibit and he’d try to make some of the things he saw there. (There was also a Da Vinci exhibit that MC would definitely take him to see). One time Leo and Dazai were smoking together at a fancy rooftop bar and ended up sharing a blunt with Snoop Dogg. Both of them wake up the next day thinking it was a fever dream. (Listen I just really think Leo and Snoop Dogg would be good friends. They are basically the same person)

Arthur:

He would immediately go to an expensive rooftop bar to flirt with women (If MC isn't part of this). His favorite places would be the strip clubs and bars (he drags Theo with him). He and Comte go to a Burlesque club together. He got kicked out of a bar once because he was unknowingly hitting on someone’s wife. This boy would also take Theo Gucci shopping with him. The two of them will probably get into several bar fights and either get kicked out or arrested. (Comte bails them out). He would take pictures with every showgirl he meets and gets Theo in on some of them (Theo is just standing there glaring at the camera with his arms crossed). He loved going to the Pitbull concert, wants to be called Mr. Worldwide now but no one will call him that. He would also go to Casinos and somehow win big to impress MC. Security is keeping an eye on him.

Comte:

One of the chillest ones on the trip. He just goes to fancy restaurants and watches Cirque Du Soliel shows. Every time you see him he just has a glass of expensive wine. He takes Leo to clubs with him, even though they just sit by the bar the whole time having a drinking competition. Comte also runs into Arthur at a Burlesque club. (This man would be into burlesque you can’t tell me otherwise).  He mostly just manages everyone’s schedule, helps them book tickets for whatever they want to do, and occasionally bails people out. Also goes to Italian restaurants with Leo (because Vegas has the best Italian food I’ve ever had ong) What? No ofc its not a date. He buys MC a new dress and leaves it on her bed with a note telling her to be ready by 6 and takes her to an exclusive restaurant in a limo. He goes all out for their date.

Shakespeare:

Bruh he would absolutely LOVE all the different shows. The whole environment that THRIVES off entertainment. This would be his dream city. He would somehow get backstage for a Variety show and help them add scenes and dance numbers. He’d come back with so many ideas for his own plays. He would also follow around some of the wilder residents to see if they do something he can include in his plays. I also believe he’d somehow find the most romantic places to take MC if she was there with them. He would also be interested in the Mob Museum and the mafia history. He would LOVE Criss Angel’s Mindfreak show (No I’m not just saying that because I love it too)

Napoleon: 

I think he would like exploring the various hotels more than going out clubbing. Let’s be honest, Comte would get the super expensive suites so Napoleon would just be sleeping in half the day. He would use it as a chance to unwind and would take full advantage of the room service and spas. He would go to the pool with MC and Sebastian. I can see him being everyone’s designated photographer and bag holder. If MC wants to go somewhere he would come with her to make sure she gets there safely (The amount of creepy old men who have stared at me when I walk through casinos is gross).

Vincent: 

He and Theo would definitely go to the Neon Graveyard with Leo. They would also love seeing the abstract art pieces and murals that are all over downtown Las Vegas. He would be so amazed seeing the seasonal decorations in the Bellagio hotel. MC would take him to the Van Gogh art gallery so he and Theo could see how successful his art has become. He also like exploring the hotel with everyone and going to the pool to relax. He would take amazing pictures of MC and make an album for her. One time he was walking to a show with everyone when a few showgirls asked if he wanted to take a picture. And being the absolute angel he is, he told them how beautiful they are and just had the most wholesome heart- stealing interaction with them. 

Theo:

He would go to old bars and pubs with Leo and Arthur in downtown Vegas (They got into a bar fight that Leo helped them hide from Comte). Arthur would drag him to various clubs but I think he would have an overall artistic appreciation for Burlesque. I think he’d be happy to see that artistic expression isn't being censored anymore like it was in his time. MC would take him and Vincent to the Van Gogh exhibit. He would also love the different murals and abstract art that's all over downtown Las Vegas. MC would buy him one of those glass art sculptures and he would be all “oh Hondje brought me a toy?” but he would actually be super touched and would blush when she gave it to him. Arthur would also drag him into taking pictures with various showgirls and then would get jealous when Theo gets more attention from them (even though Theo isn’t a big fan of it).

Isaac:

Isaac would go to all the different museum exhibits with Leo, MC, and the Van Gogh. He would also enjoy the Avengers Exhibit because of all the crazy technology and scientific concepts used in creating it. He would also go to the spas with Napoleon and MC because that boy needs to relax himself. I think most of the time he would either stick with Leo, Napoleon or MC because Vegas is... a lot and he might get overwhelmed. Arthur would rope him into taking a picture with the Showgirls and he would be flustered for the rest of the day. He mostly just gets dragged into whatever activities the others are doing.

Dazai:

Dazai would love all the different comedy shows. He would also be exploring the hotels but instead of finding the spa he would find the most random hidden storage areas and rooms of the hotel. By the end of the trip he would somehow know the whole hotel inside out. One time he went missing and no one could find them until he came down the elevator with this rich elderly couple who gave him a tour of their whole VIP floor. He would also go out to bars with Leo in the middle of the night and they’d come back and just smoke together on the balcony. He would find the best obscure dessert places in the whole city and somehow make friends with a celebrity that he met purely by accident. (He just shows up to lunch with Pitbull one day and he’s like “yeah I just met him in the bathroom”. MC and Sebastian are  s h o o k)

Mozart:

Mozart would be very interested in seeing the street musicians and how they're able to play songs from everyday objects.He, Comte, and MC go shopping together and then they’d go to exclusive lounges together. He gets dragged to clubs by everyone but god forbid he gets touched by a sweaty person dancing, he will LOOSE IT. He gives pointers to the DJs and he actually likes listening to different genres of music. (Funny story, one time my dad went to a club in Vegas where Calvin Harris was DJing and he gave him tips on how to mix songs. He had no idea who Calvin Harris was). Mozart loves the spa and huge bathrooms, hates casinos since he thinks they're noisy and filthy. He goes to the mall and buys expensive skincare items. 

Jean:

Poor boy is so lost. Just like Isaac he kind of gets dragged everywhere. He likes going to the lounges with MC and Mozart but most of the time he will just want to enjoy the hotel room alone. MC doesn't want him to be alone the whole time so she takes him to see the Bellagio decorations and takes adorable candid pictures of him while he's there. He is amazed at how they were able to create something like that. He’s also amazed at the fountain show that MC takes him to at night. Mozart and MC take Jean with them when they goes shopping and he buys Jean some nice things (because he DESERVES IT). Would avoid clubs at all costs and if he somehow gets dragged there by everyone he leaves the first chance he gets.

Sebastian:

Like Shakespeare, Sebastian also follows around the residents, seeing how they react to such a new environment. He takes notes on all their activities and exchanges info with Shakespeare. He made all the reservations and keeps track of everyone’s itinerary. He is the only other person who knows about Arthur and Theo’s bar fight because Leo told him in exchange for modern cigarettes. He was so excited when Napoleon asked him to join him in their spa trip. Most of the time Sebastian goes with Comte and Napoleon to their activities. He would also love seeing some of the historical exhibits, like the Titanic and Ancient Egypt ones in the Luxor hotel. He’s mainly just happy to have enough free time to write as much info in his book as he wants.

[sassyduckqueen]

Miraculous: Rise of Anatis 63

And that's Kwami Buster. This was pretty fun to write so I hope you enjoyed it. Next chapter will be some OCs akumas so that will be fun :) anway, hope you guys enjoyed this chapter :D

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Chapter Sixty-Three: Kwami Buster

Luka sighed as he sat on his bed, taking a deep breath and trying to keep a steady pace. He had woke up again from another nightmare. This time it had been the Mob Boss related one, causing him to wake up screaming. The Captain had rushed in and hugged him, telling him it was ok. He had been crying but calmed down after a while. The Captain had gone to get him a drink while he tried to calm his breathe. He jumped a little as she came back in and placed a water on his bedside. She sat on his bed and gave him a soft smile.

 "Do you feel calmer?" She asked, causing him to nod in reply as he picked up the water and downed half of it. "Do you want to talk about it?"

 "It was just about Mob Boss again," He replied, putting the glass down on his side table before bringing his knees up and hugging them. "...You don't hate me, do you?..."

 "Of course, I don't, lad," Anarka gasped, moving closer and hugging him. "I love you so don't ever think otherwise,"

 "R-right," He nodded, giving her a weak smile as he returned her hug. "I love you too, Ma,"

 She gently rubbed his back and placed a kiss on his head.

 "Do you want to try and get back to sleep?" She asked, making him nod. She gave him a smile and gently placed another kiss on his head before leaving his room. He waited for a few minutes before he heard her watching tv again before he jumped up as Tikki flew out. He transformed and climbed onto the roof before catching the akuma that Hawkmoth had sent for him before sitting down and waiting for the rest that would come. After two hours, he caught another one before letting out a sigh and waiting for another ten minutes. No more came, causing him to let a sigh of relief before he released the butterflies he had caught. They flew off but one of them landed on his nose, making him smile a little before it flew off. At least, he knew the butterflies themselves weren't evil. Just like the akumatized, they were tools for Hawkmoth to use. He jumped down and slid through the window, detransform as soon as he did. He caught Tikki and walked over to her little bed, setting her on it before he went into his draw and took out a cookie for her. 

 "Thank you," She smiled as he stretched. "Are you gonna try to sleep now?"

"I should, shouldn't I?" He replied as she ate the cookie. He climbed back into the bed and curled up as Tikki continued eating her cookie. Hopefully with the summer holidays coming up, he would be able to take some time to relax. Maybe even catch up on some much needed sleep. He yawned to himself before curling up and closing his eyes, drifting in a dreamless sleep.

 ~Next Day at School~

 "Ok, Class!" Mrs Mendevileve shouted, clapping her hands to get everyone's attention. Luka looked up from his notepad as she waited for everyone to look at her. "As I said at the beginning of class, I have an announcement to make. This Thursday Afternoon coming, your usual class with me will be covered by Mr Damocles as I have applied to be on the show Alternative Truth and my application was accepted. Now I expect you all to be on your best behaviour understood?"

 "Yes, Mrs Mendevlieve," The class chanted as the bell rang, signaling lunch time. Luka got up and grabbed his bag, opening it and putting his books inside. Tikki was curled up inside snoozing, making him smile softly. He closed his bag and walked out of the room before Marc rushed over to him. 

 "H-Hey, Luka... um can I j-join you for lunch?" He asked, looking at his hands. "N-Nathaniel's at the d-dentist today so I was hoping I could sit with you and Marinette... if that's ok?"

 "Of course, Marc," Luka smiled, making the shyer boy smile as they walked over off the room. "H-How's things going?"

 "They're ok," Luka replied, making him looking at him. "What about you?"

 "Ok I guess," Marc replied, playing with his hands again. "I... I was wondering something..."

 "What's up?" He asked, looking at him. He felt more jumpy than usual.

 "I... I'm thinking of going to therapy for my anxiety..." Marc muttered, looking down. "I... I hope you don't me asking you actually. I know you don't know me too well compared to Marinette and Nathaniel but... you've always been really nice to me and you seem wise so I was hoping for... advice?"

 Luka looked at Marc in surprise, causing him to gasp and look down. 

 "T-That was stupid," He muttered, frowning. "I shouldn't have asked-"

 "Oh, no... no, it's not stupid at all," Luka smiled, making Marc looking up at him. "Honestly, I think that if you think therapy can help with your anxiety then you should definitely try it out but it can be rough as well so be prepared for that,"

 "R-Really?" He gasped, looking at Luka. "T-Thank you... I think I want to but... I don't know... maybe I'm overthinking things... urg and now I'm projecting onto you... I'm sorry..."

 "It's fine," Luka smiled as they reached the canteen. Marinette was already sat there with the rest of their friends. Luka smiled and waved back as she waved at them before he turned to Marc. "If you want, I could ask my therapist about how ways for you to get help with your anxiety,"

 "R-Really? You would do that?" Marc asked, looking at Luka with surprise. He gave Marc a soft smile and nodded, causing the younger boy to grin. "Yes! That would be great. Thank you,"

 "I haven't done anything-" Luka started but Marc shook his head.

 "Y-You have," He replied, glancing at his hands. "For one, you don't judge me and you listen to me. You didn't laugh at me either. I tried to bring it up to my dad and he kind of laughed at me. He isn't a bad man but he doesn't understand the whole mental health thing. He's of the opinion that men shouldn't cry and well... I'm not a typical 'man' as you can probably tell... I'm rambling, aren't I?"

 "It's ok, Marc," Luka smiled as he picked out his food. "Juleka rambles a lot when she gets nervous... but I think it's brave that you want to tackle your anxiety,"

 "Thanks," Marc smiled as they grabbed their trays and sat down with the others. "C-Could I also watch the next show you guys play? I r-really want to go to a concert but..."

 "It's too much?" Luka asked, causing him to nod. "Well, we would love to have you at one of our shows. I'm not sure when we're next playing though.... but well, we could do something during the summer holidays,"

 "Oh yeah... that would be great," Marc smiled as he sat down. Marinette gave them a smile as they sat down and began to eat before the group began to talk about their summer plans. Luka just listened in and occasionally put in a bit of insight or suggestions. He knew he wouldn't be able to make too many plans with his commitment to be a hero but they didn't need to know that. Felix let out a sigh and explained he would be going back to London for a few weeks while Kagami mentioned she might have to visit Japan for a week if her father had time. Luka couldn't help but frown a little as she had never mentioned her father before and he didn't exactly have fond memories of her mother. Mostly because he had been eaten by her when she was Ikari Gozen. While it didn't haunt his nightmares, it still freaked him out but mostly because she had been part car. Still he had been rescued and it's not like he could tell Kagami that it was him who got eaten. As far as she was aware, it was Anatis but still it counted. He mused to himself as he ate his lunch. He hadn't thought about it during Miracle Queen's attack or that day at all but he never thought he would be eaten by a giant centuror or swing around Paris on a yoyo. It was really quite amazing what he could do as Anatis... yet his connection with Feng haunted him and the old mage wasn't much help as he had seen him, he didn't exactly say much. He hoped that changed soon. He jumped a little as he felt someone poke his cheek. Marinette grinned at him as he looked at her.

 "You zoned out..." She stated, making him blink before he chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his neck.

 "Sorry... was thinking about things," He replied, making her give him an endearing smile. He blushed a little at her gaze. "What did I miss?"

 "Nino's has a DJing gig lined up," She replied, making him smile. "We're all invited,"

 "Awesome," He smiled, turning to the fellow musician. "That's wicked, dude. Well done,"

 "Thanks, Bro," He grinned, gleaming under Luka's praise. "I'm extremely excited but nervous,"

 "I bet," Luka nodded. "But you'll be great,"

 "Luka's right, Nino," Adrien grinned, making him smile even more. "I'll try and get my dad to let me go but I'm sure I can... come to the wrong address again,"

 "I can cover for you, depending on if I'm able to avoid Japan," Kagami added in, making Adrien nod. "Does anyone have any other plans for the summer?"

 "Not really," Alya replied, poking her food with her fork. "Apart from babysitting that is,"

 "Me and Ivan will be going to some protests for environmental changes," Mylene added in, making people nod. They continued to talk about their plans until the bell rang. Luka said his goodbyes to the others and headed to the library for a free period. He took out his books and read up on his studies as Tikki stayed with him. However, he happened to glance up at the right time, causing him to see a black blur fly by. He frowned and opened his bag, causing Tikki to look up with concern.

 "I just saw a black blur flying by," He stated, making her blink before an annoyed expression came onto her face. "Tikki?"

 "It's Plagg!" She gasped, making him frown. "A large wheel of cheese has been appearing in the science lab every day for the last week. I told him off last week when I saw him go by during your gym lesson but I guess that stinky sock keeps on eating it,"

 "What?!" He gasped, standing up and clearing up his books before he rushed into the science lab. He burst through the door and crossed his arms as soon as he saw Plagg eating. He looked up as he was able to take another bite. Tikki flew out and minicked Luka's pose. 

 "Luka! Sugarcube!" He grinned, making the two frown. "How nice to see you!"

 "You said you were going to quit!" She gasped, making him chuckle.

 "How could I?!" He gasped, hugging the cheese. "I can't resist such irresistible beauty!"

 "Plagg, you could have been seen," Luka pointed out, walking over. "What if someone thought Lady Noir went to this school?"

 "What?! Nooo! She doesn't!!" He gasped, making Luka raise an eyebrow. "I swear,"

 "You're a terrible liar," He stated, gently flicking Plagg's nose lightly. "But for the sake of not wanting to know her identity, I'm going to ignore that,"

 "Look, I'm sorry. It just smells so good!" He gasped, making Luka sigh. "It's magic cheese!"

 "It's obviously a trap!" Tikki gasped, making Luka pinch his nose before he picked up Plagg and held him.

 "Plagg, you are not to visit this every again," He stated in a serious manner. "If you do, I will get Lady Noir to feed you nothing but mild cheddar. Got it?"

 "You wouldn't!" He gasped but Luka gave him a look, making him gasp again as he realized he was serious. "Ok! Ok! You have my word but can I finish this slice?!"

 "No, you need to return to Lady Noir," Luka replied, making Plagg sigh but he knew the boy was right. He flew up and sighed, looking back at Luka with a sad expression but Luka crossed his arms and gave him a look. "Go,"

 "Alright, alright," He gasped, flying off through the wall. As soon as he was gone, Luka and Tikki let out a sigh and walked out of the classroom. As soon as they were out of sight, Mrs Mendelieve moved out from under her desk, clutching her net. She had intended to capture the creatures but she had no idea that Luka had known who they were but apparently he did. Now that she knew the black cat was associated with Lady Noir, it made sense. It was a known fact that Luka was friends with Anatis but... well... she had never seen him and Anatis in the same room together. No one had and now she thought about it, they did look very similar but surely she would know if her student was the superhero... right?

 ~Thursday Afternoon~

 "Mr Damocles!!" Alya gasped, standing up as he looked at her. "Can you confirm rumors that Mrs Mendeleiev isn't here today because she'll be appearing on the alternative truth TV show?"

 "Where everything isn't always truth," Kim gasped, standing up and making a tick sign with his arms. "But nothing's really false!"

 He moved his arms into a cross position as Mr Damocles shook his head.

 "It may be truth that she discovered a scientific discovery of utter most importance," He replied, making the class gasp before they asked if they could watch the show, making Alix facepalm.

 "My brother is one of the guests as well," She muttered as Mr Damocles agreed and had them move to the Library. They cheered and got up, heading to there as they discussed what she might have found. Marinette couldn't help but smile a little as she walked with Alya. She glanced over as she walked inside and saw Luka sat at the table, doing his homework. As if on cue, he looked up and gave her a smile with a small wave. She smiled back and walked over.

 "What's your class doing here?" He asked as Mr Damocles came in and set up a tv.

 "We're watching Alternative truth," She explained, making him nod. "Why don't you watch it as well?"

 "I should focus on my homework," He admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "But... A few minutes won't hurt,"

 "Ok!" She grinned as she sat on the ground near him. Alya sat next to her as the show began. Kim naturally quoted the slong as Alec did before Mrs Mendeleiev was welcomed on. He excitedly pointed her out, making Luka smile a little as Mr Damocles told him to sit down. Alec explained the rules of the show. All Mrs Mendeleiev had to do was convince the panel of experts that her theory was real. Though Marinette and Luka weren't sure if you could call XY, Mr Banana and Manon experts on science. However, he was interested now so he looked up as she cleared her throat.

 "What you are about to witness is proof of the existence of interdimensional beings with incredible powers," She stated, making Luka bit his lip. Of course, she had set up the cheese. "Who can move through matter and seem to be attracted to aged cheese,"

 Luka frowned deeply as he continued to watch. This was not good.

 "I discovered the first of these creatures just before the christmas holidays," She explained, making Luka feel even more pale. "I soon discovered a second creature not long after the akuma Reflekta attacked. Since then I have been observing them closely. Now for my proof. Watch,"

 She gestured to the video on screen, showing her observing a plate of cheese by hiding in a cupboard. It appeared nothing was happening.

 "You can't see the creature itself as they're not filmable but right now, it is eating the cheese while the second creature tries to get it to leave the cheese alone," She explained before walking over to the screen as it zoomed into the cheese. "But look right there! You can see the cheese been eaten over time,"

 She walked back over to the stand and turned to the screen again.

 "Given that I was unable to capture these creatures on film, I've mades sketches of them, to give you an idea of what they look like," She declared, showing the images. Despite that they were badly drawn, it was quite obvious that it was suppose to be Plagg and Tikki. A number of the students watching looked pale, recognizing them as kwamis before Chloe cleared her throat with a nervous look. Luka just stared at the screen in surprise.

 "What even are those suppose to be?" She asked, looking around and hoping that someone else got the idea. Luckily, Max did and pushed up his glasses. 

 "I doubt this show is scientific at all," He replied as Marinette got up and carefully slipped out. She made her way quickly to the bathroom and locked the cubical before opening her purse. Plagg flew out with a look of shame.

 "Plagg, that was really irresponsible!" She gasped, making him look down. He wanted to justify it but he knew she was right. "You could have been captured,"

 "I'm sorry, dollface," He mumbled, playing with his paws as she held out her hand. He floated over and sat on them. "But at least we can't be seen on film and we can fly through through things,"

 He looked up to see if it had helped but Marinette looked upset.

 "Why didn't you tell me you were hungry?" She gasped, shaking her head. She was blaming herself. "I could have gotten you extra cheese,"

 "I.. I wasn't really... I was just been greedy..." He admitted, looking down. Marinette's eyes soften a little. "I really am sorry. I owe Sugarcube an apology too. She was right as usual and tried to stop me... as usual, I didn't listen..."

 "Sugarcube?" She asked before it clicked. "As in Tikki?"

 He nodded.

 "So it really was her... but that means..." Her eyes widen as she realized. "Wait a sec! If Tikki was there too then that means she was here in the school, which means Anatis is a student at this school... just like me?!"

 "Whaat?! Nooo!!" Plagg gasped, flying up. "Sugarcube has like a second sense when I get into trouble so she just followed it! That's all!"

 "Plagg... you're a terrible liar," She stated, making him frown. "But I know if I try to work out who Anatis is, I'll have to give up been Lady Noir and I don't want that. I know Master Fu will find a replacement but I don't want to leave Annie alone so I won't try to find out who he is,"

 ~Back to Luka~

 "It's time for our jury to vote and tell us if they think the theories are true or false!" Alec shouted as Kim did the same before he sat down as Mr Damocles stared at him. Luka was hoping they would vote her theory as false and that would be the end of it. Alec walked over to Alix's brother, causing Kim to point him as Alix groaned in embassassment. "Jalil Kubdel hypothesized that pyramids are in fact alien spaceships that came down to earth because they ran out of gas. What do you think?"

 The panel's lights turned green, meaning he had won.

 "Our jury has been convinced," He stated, turning to the camera. "Jalil succeeds!"

 "Whoa! Your brother's won! Awesome!" Kim gasped as he shouted true or false. Alix looked over with an expression of sheer embarrassment before giving a thumbs up to Kim. The next contestant got two out of three votes, meaning they had won and then finally it was Mrs Mendeleiev's turn. She looked at the panel with a stern look as Alec read out her theory. However, none of the panel thought it was true. Luka silently let out a sigh of relief.

 "I'm sorry, Mrs Mendelieve but your fake video footage failed to convince our panel," Alec declared, walking over to the panel as Mr Banana told her to stay Peachy.

 "It wasn't fake I swear!" She gasped as a security guard walked over to lead her from the stage. "This is an authentic, major scientific discovery!"

 "You're welcome to come back when you've captured your cheese eating creatures," Alec laughed, making Luka frown. He never understood why he had to be mean about it. However, Mrs Mendevlieve ripped her arm from the security guard.

 "Wait! I have a witness!" She called out, making the camera turn to her. "One of my students interacted with these creatures just the other day! He knows they are real! Just ask him! His name is Luka!"

 However, the panel ignored her and the security guard pulled out as Luka stared at the screen with shock as the show ended. He quickly got up and left the room before anyone could question him, heading to the bathroom. He quickly rushed past the lockers, failing to notice Marinette walking out of the girls room before he headed into the bathroom, locking a cubical. Tikki flew out as he held his head in his hands.

 "I should have known she was in there!" He gasped, looking up at Tikki. "Now people might work I'm Anatis! Oh no! Hawkmoth might work it out! Tikki, we need to be ready in case! Spots on!"

 He transformed into Anatis before sighing. His yoyo vibrated, making him take it out before he watched the video, discovering that Mrs Mendeleiev had become akumatized. She was demanding Anatis show himself with his kwami and to bring Luka as a witness with a wicked smirk on her face. If they didn't turn up, she would drop the vault that had the show host, Alec, trapped inside. It was obvious that Hawkmoth and her suspected that he was the same person and know it would be impossible for him to show up as both Anatis and Luka but he had to find a way too.

 "This is bad..." He muttered, frowning to himself. "I need to work out a plan to convince her and everyone that I'm not Anatis..."

 He shook his head and exited the window, heading to the TV studio. He got there as she threw the vault of the building, causing him to throw his yoyo and wrap it around the vault, stopping it from failing. He yanked it up, causing it to land on the roof. He spun open the lock and opened the door, releasing Alec who rushed out as Lady Noir landed on top of the vault.

 "Turns out the answer was true," She grinned. "Annie defies the law of science,"

 "Anatis is secretly the student rockstar Luka Couffaine... true or false?" Kwami Buster asked, smirking.

 "False," Lady Noir stated, making her blink. Anatis knew she was lying but she was also trying not to believe it or confirm that it was true. "I've seen Mr Couffaine and Annie together so sorry but you and Hawkmoth are wrong,"

 "Then I'll just take your kwamis and see who's under the mask," Kwami Buster declared, firing an beam at them. The two of them dived away and dodged her attacks before throwing their own weapons towards her. She dodged them and fired at them again. "Back off, kids! I'm a scientist!"

 "Yet you chose to go on a TV show that isn't run by authentic scientists!" Anatis shot back, diving behind a pillar as Lady Noir dived behind an air vent. "I hope your kwami has learnt his lesson,"

 "Oh he has," She gasped, making him nod. "I'm sorry for his actions though. I hope you and Tikki are ok,"

 "We're fine," He smiled, throwing his yoyo out. Kwami Buster dodged it and fired at him. He jumped back as she missed before she fired at a pole, breaking it. It fell towards him, forcing him to move. With him distracted, she fired at him and caught him in the beam. "So Kwamis don't exist huh?! Well, here's the proof!"

 "Anatis!" Lady Noir called out as he tried to back away and resist. He could feel the beam pulling on him and he felt Tikki been yanked out of his earrings. He dove to the side as she got ripped out, hiding behind the vents as Lady Noir gasped. "Annie!"

 "I'm ok but don't come over here!" He called out, making her frown and dodge as Kwami Buster fired towards her. He glanced around, hoping for a solution but without Tikki, nothing lit up. He looked around the corner and gasped as Kwami Buster began to walk over to him. However, Lady Noir summoned her power and used it on one of the billboards, causing to almost land on Kwami Buster before getting her attention so she was more focused on firing at her. Luka crawled under the debris and out of the fire escape. He would have to thank her later. He rushed down the fire escape stairs and out of one, glancing up at the roof as Lady Noir dodged and engaged Kwami Buster. He let out a sigh and ran off as fast as he could to Master Fu's.

 ~Back on the roof~

 Lady Noir jumped around, dodging the beams of Kwami Buster as she distracted her, hoping Anatis got away. She knew he would go to Fu's and get help. Her mind kept flicking to the idea of Luka and Anatis been the same person but she pushed it back and ignored it even if it did make sense. She jumped up on a beam and spun around as Kwami Buster fired at her. She went to run off but Kwami Buster fired at her again and again, revealing she had trapped her on there.

 "Now I'm gonna seize your kwami, cat! Truth or False?" She declared as she fired at her, capturing her in her beam. Lady Noir groaned and tried to pull back but she could feel Plagg been ripped from her ring. Seeing a crane bucket, she dived into it as Plagg got sucked from her. She let out a sigh of relief as she looked around and found the controls as Kwami Buster moved over to her. She pressed it, sending the bucket down. She climbed out and under the debris before escaping out of the fire exit. She rushed down the stairs and into the building, looking for a room to hide in. She opened a door and hid inside as she heard kwami buster coming down the stairs. She glanced around the dressing room before coming across a leather jacket, Mr Banana's suit and a domino mask. She took out her pigtails and turned them into a single plait before taking the yellow leggings out of Mr Banana's suit and putting them off. She put the leather jacket on and zipped it then added the mask, tying it over her face. She grabbed Mr Banana's boots and put them on before looking out of the door. She didn't look too similar to Marinette but she just had to hope no one who knew her saw her. She carefully made her way outside of the room and to the exit.

 ~At Master Fu's~

 "Master!" Luka gasped as he burst through the door, causing Master Fu to sit up. "Tikki's been captured and Hawkmoth might work out my identity!"

 "You're aware of the consequences of that," He stated, making Luka nod.

 "I know!" He gasped as Master Fu got up and took out the miraculous box. "But I'm gonna fix it and save Tikki,"

 "I know you will," Master Fu replied, taking out the box and placing in front of Luka before he opened it, causing the drawers to pop out as Luka glanced at them. Almost instantly, the fox and the mouse lit up as a plan began to form in his mind. Kwami Buster lured him there because she knew he couldn't be in two places at once but what if he could. "Luka Couffaine, you must pick a miraculous. Only this time, you wouldn't be giving to someone else. You will wear it yourself until you can get Tikki back,"

 Luka nodded and began taking out all of them, putting them on as Master Fu gasped.

 "What are you doing?" He asked as Luka placed the circlet on his head, causing it to turn into a thin headband as he added the others. "I know you've merged miraculous before but merging this many could drive you insane,"

 "Don't worry, Master," Luka smiled as he slid on the snake bracelet, freeing Sass before placing the mouse miraculous around his neck. It turned into an amber donut amulet as he clipped in the goat's hair clips. "I only need the mouse's power. I'm just wearing the others to free the Kwamis. I need their help for this plan,"

 He put the last of the miraculous on before standing up.

 "Mullo! Get Squeaky!" He declared, causing Mullo to get sucked into the necklace. It lit up and turned black with pink mice on it before he did a backflip, creating his outfit which was gray bodysuit with dark gray sides. He threw his arm to the side, creating his gloves that were black with pink rims. The pink light created his boots that were black with pink heels. He moved his hands over his hair, turning into gray with pink highlights before moving his arms downwards over his face, creating his mask, which was pink and gray with a black trim. He caught the pink energy in his hands, creating a jump rope. He jumped over it a couple of times before it turned into his belt, completing his look. "And now I'm Mousekin,"

 He walked over to the window and opened it before stumbling and gasping a little as he fell to the ground. Master Fu looked at him with worry.

 "Are you sure about this, Luka?" He asked, frowning as Mousekin pushed himself back up.

 "If I don't then who will defeat Kwami Buster and help Lady Noir?" He asked, looking to Master Fu. "To capture her akuma, I need to get my Ladybug powers back first so I need to save Tikki. To that, I'm gonna let myself get captured. Kwami Buster wants Kwamis so she can have them. She won't think anyone else will be able to get inside her backpack so she won't be expecting it. I call it the trojan kwami move,"

 "That's very clever," Master Fu nodded. "But how are you gonna pull it?"

 "That's why I need the mouse," He replied, taking out the jump rope. He jumped over it before spinning the rope around him and throwing it into the air. "Multitude!"

 The rope wrapped around him and glowed, disappearing into his boots that lit up. Slowly, he got smaller as he divided into a number of mini versions of himself. He walked over to one of them and took the fox miraculous off, handing it to the other mouse. He took it and put it on before holding out his hand.

 "Mullo! Trixx!" He called out, placing his hands together. "Unify!"

 The pink and dark gray on his outfit turned orange as a flute appeared on his back. An orange triangle appeared below his collar on his neck, showing the fox miraculous hanging there and he gained an orange trim on his boots. The pink highlights turned orange as well as did his jump rope. He jumped onto the miracle box as the original mouse gave one of the others the snake miraculous and whispered something to him, getting a nod of him.

 "And now I'm Foxkin," He declared, grinning before he turned to the Kwamis and the rest of the Micekin. They nodded at him before climbing into a number of the kwami's mouths as Fluff flew over to him. He jumped into her mouth, causing them to fly off as Master Fu looked worried.

 "If Anatis fails this time, Hawkmoth will get all of the miraculous," He declared, closing the window.

 "He has never failed,"

 ~Back at the Studios~

 Marinette ran and dodged Kwami Buster's beam as she chased her before she jumped over and grabbed her arm, causing to her struggle as she tried to pull her arm from her grip. Kwami Buster smirked and went to grab her ring, making Marinette panic.

 "Charge!" A male voice declared, causing the women to look over as a number of Kwamis charged towards them. Kwami Buster let go of her, causing her to fall on the ground as she began to fire at the kwamis and chase them. Marinette let out a sigh before one of the kwamis flew over. She recognized them as Sass and Long, causing her to raise an eyebrow as Sass opened his mouth and revealed a small boy sat inside. He resembled Anatis but also looked a little different.

  “Annie?” Marinette asked as she looked at the tiny boy sat in Sass’ mouth. He had pink and gray hair and wore a simple gray boy suit with black sides, black boots and black gloves with a pink trim . His mask was gray and pink with a black outline. He gave her a soft smile before shaking his head. 

 “No, I’m Mousekin,” He replied, making her blink. “Anatis asked me to help out. One of my brothers will need your ring for our plan to work,”

 “Brothers?” She asked as a kwami she recognized as Longg flew over. It opened its mouth, revealing another boy identical to the current one. “You’re twins?”

 “Nope, he’s me and I’m him. The mouse gave the original me the power to split into multiple versions of myself. Only we’re small,” The original one replied. Or she thought he was the original one. He might not be. He jumped out of Sass’ mouth and landed on the desk as his brother did the same thing. She blinked before taking her hand out of the costume and looking at her ring. As if sensing her hesitation, the little mouse boy gently put his hand on her costume. “I promise I only want to help you and Anatis,”

 “Alright,” She replied, taking her ring off and passing it to the other mouse boy. He smiled and moved it over his head so he was wearing it.

 “Don’t worry, Lady Noir. I’ll get your kwami back,” He replied before turning to the other one. “You remember the plan right?”

 “Of course,” The original mouse boy smiled as the other one nodded and jumped back into Longg's mouth before he turned back to her. “We need to go and meet Anatis on the roof but first,”

 He took off a bracelet and held it out to her. It was the size of a ring but the moment she took it off him, it turned back to it’s real size. She blinked as she realized that it was the snake miraculous.

 “Anatis thought it would be a good idea to have you use that,” He stated, making her blink. "He said the transformation words are Sass, Scales Slither,"

 "Alright," She replied, slipping it on. It turned in a rose gold bracelet with an infinity symbol in the middle. She held up her arm and turned to Sass. "Sass! Scales Slither!!"

 Sass got sucked into the bracelet, charging it up before she spun around, causing her hair. to turn into a long plait. Unlike her Lady Noir form, it was loose and the top part resembled a cobra's hood. She had a silver bead at the end of it, sealing the braid. It was dark green in color and faded into dark teal. She swiped her hand across her face, creating her mask that resembled a snake before she held up her hands, causing a teal light to move across her body, creating her outfit. She wore a teal blue suit with dark green and teal green details. She had thigh high boots with diamond details on them and she had large yellow diamonds on her hips. She had a thin belt around her waist and her gloves were just over her elbows. Her eyes were snake like and her lyre appeared on her hip, completing the look. She leaned down to Mousekin and gave him a smile.

 "How do I look?" She asked as he looked up at her.

 "Very pretty," He smiled, making her blush a little. "What do you want me to call you?"

 "Call me Queen Cobra," She replied, holding out his hand. He climbed on it and she moved her hand to her shoulder. He climbed on and sat on it, holding onto her hair as she ran over to the fire escape. They rushed upstairs but stopped outside of the door. "So what's the plan, Mousekin?"

 "The mouse with your miraculous needs to get captured but we need to stay hidden," He replied as they opened the door and peeked out. "If Kwami Buster sees you, she'll try and capture the snake kwami, which will reveal you but we need to make sure she doesn't win hence the snake's ability. Anatis said it's a save point,"

 "It is. Second chance," She replied, flicking it. "We now have five minutes,"

 "Ok," Mousekin nodded as they slipped outside. However, Kwami Buster fired at them and caught them. Queen Cobra managed to flicker the bracelet back before Sass got captured, making her frown as she returned back to the moment before. She tried a different way but Kwami Buster caught them again, causing her to flick back her bracelet again before she frowned."Something wrong?"

 "We almost got captured twice," She replied, making him frown. "She sees us straight away,"

 "Hang on," He replied, pressing his hand to ear. "Any Micekin listening, can you provide a distraction? Me and Queen Cobra need to get pass Kwami Buster,"

 "On it!" One of them replied, causing him to jump down and rush out. Seeing Kwami Buster facing away from them as a number of kwamis flew around her, he waved to Queen Cobra, causing her to rush out. He also made a mental note of the helicopter that was filming the fight. The two of them hid behind a vent and looked out.

 "Good job, Mousekin," She smiled as she picked him back up and placed him back on his shoulder. He nodded and kept a lookout, smiling a little as he saw Long get captured. The trojan Kwami was in place.

 ~Inside Kwami Buster's Weapon~

 "It looks like your owner has failed us, Tikki," Plagg gasped as the other kwamis appeared inside. "We're doomed,"

 Longg and Pollen flew over, making them look at them before they opened their mouth, revealing two of the Micekin. Plagg gasped in surprise as they jumped out.

 "Anatis?!" He asked in surprise as they looked up at him.

 "I told you my owner is the best!" Tikki grinned, proud of his plan.

 "I'd never abandon you, Tikki," He smiled as the other one nodded. He turned to him. "Ready for the next part?"

 "Sure," He replied, holding out his hands. "Plagg! Mullo! Unify!"

 He joined his hands together as his outfit gained green where the pink and dark gray was and two cat ears appeared on his head before the other Mousekin held out his hands.

 "Tikki, Mullo!" He called out, moving his hands together. "Unify!"

 Like his other selves, he gained red where the dark gray and pink was before black spots appeared across the rest of his suit. Catkin looked at him, getting a nod of him before holding out his hand.

 "Cataclysm!" He declared, charging up his hand before placing it against the inner wall of the container. It cracked it before it blew up, freeing the akuma and the kwamis. Catkin and Bugkin climbed back into the mouths of Longg and Pollen before they flew out. Bugkin jumped down, along with the other micekin as they saw the akuma flutter up. He threw his yoyo in the air, summoning a lucky charm which was a small bowl. It flew and landed on the akuma, trapping it as the other kwamis and micekin held it down. Mrs Mendelieve looked around confused as Longg flew over to Queen Cobra. Catkin jumped down and ran over to her, turning back to his normal form as the mousekin on her shoulder jumped back down. He took off the ring and held it out to her. "Your ring as promised,"

 "Thank you, mysterious mousekin," She smiled, taking it and putting it back on before the two of them ran back over to the others.

 "Foxkin, can you hear me?" Bugkin asked, causing Foxkin to over from the vent and gave him a thumbs up. "Phase 3,"

 "Got it," He replied, taking out the flute and holding it to his mouth. He played the tune, creating the ball of light before he threw it. "Mirage!"

 A few seconds later, Queen Cobra looked up as Plagg sat on her shoulder as Anatis landed back on the roof, making her smile. He knelt down as Mousekin walked over to him.

 "Great job, Mousekin. Thanks to you, we got our kwamis back," He smiled before looking over at Queen Cobra. "You took my suggestion I see,"

 "It really helped," Mousekin replied as Queen Cobra grinned.

 "Awesome job boys!" She yelled out, making them both smile before Anatis stood up and released the akuma. He threw his yoyo and captured it before freeing the purified version. He picked up the bowl and threw it up in the air, releasing the cure and fixing everything as Queen Cobra came over, making sure for Mrs Mendeleiev to hear her as Mousekin reformed into his full size. "I'm sorry my kwami headed to that middle school, Annie. I don't know why he did but I'll keep a better eye on him,"

 "It's ok, Lady Noir," He smiled. "Would you mind taking the teacher back? I need to get Mousekin's miraculous,"

 "Oh right, you need this," He gasped, taking it off and turning back into Luka, causing Queen Cobra and Mrs Mendelieve to gasp in surprise. Anatis looked at him with a surprised expression. "Did I do something wrong?"

 "You weren't suppose to take it off yet," He replied, making Luka frown. "I normally take it back after we've left the scene... especially since..."

 He glanced up at the helicopter in the sky. Luka frowned as he saw it before sighing.

 "I'm sorry," He replied as Anatis placed his hand on his shoulder.

 "We all make mistakes, Luka," He stated, making the boy nod. "But this means I can never give you a miraculous again,"

 "Right," Luka replied, nodding as Anatis turned to Queen Cobra.

 "Lady... I mean... Queen Cobra... I'll get Luka back home if you can get Mrs Mendeleiev safe,"

 "Of course," She nodded, turning to the teacher as she turned to Luka.

 "So you're not Anatis?" She asked, making him shake his head. "I see... well, would you three be willing to testify that I really did make a discovery?"

 "We can't," Anatis replied, making her frown. "The Kwamis are how we get our powers. Revealing their existence to the world would help Hawkmoth,"

 "Oh!" She gasped, frowning. "I didn't think of that... I'm sorry. I put you and my student in danger. I'll keep your secret,"

 "Thank you," He replied before swinging off with Luka. Queen Cobra lead Mrs Mendeleiev out of the building and the helicopter flew off, seeing the fight was over. Foxkin waited for a few minutes before he carefully walked over, tired from the merges before swiping his flute across the illusion.

 "Reality!" He declared, making all the damage and the other micekins appear with the lucky charm. He remerged all of them and turned back to Anatis before catching the akuma and releasing the cure for real this time. The kwamis cheered around him before he dived off the building and headed to Master Fu's while keeping an eye out for Lady Noir. 

 ~Hawkmoth's Lair~

 "Breaking news, an ally of Anatis was revealed to be none other then Luka Couffaine, son of Rockstar Jagged Stone," Nadja Chumack declared, showing footage of Anatis and Luka in the same place. Gabriel frowned as he turned it off. He was so sure he had discovered Anatis' real identity but there was no way for the two boys to appear in the same place as far as he knew but at least, he could cross Mr Couffaine off his list of who Anatis was. 

 "One day, Anatis, I will discover who you are," He growled, glaring at the dark screen. "You and Lady Noir will fall to me and I shall have my wish!"

 ~At Master Fu's~

 "Lady Noir returned the snake miraculous," Master Fu replied as Luka put back the other miraculous. "Your plan was well thought out but are you feeling ok?"

 "A little tired but otherwise ok," He replied, looking up as he closed the box. "Lady Noir and my identity are safe. As far as Paris and Hawkmoth will be concerned, Luka is the holder of the mouse miraculous or at least, he was and I think Plagg has learn his journey. As for me and Lady Noir, we won't be looking into each other's identity. We know the rules,"

 "Yes, she said something similar," He replied, smiling. "Clearly, you two are the best choice for the Ladybug and the black cat. I'm glad that I don't have to take away your miraculous. You know there is no miraculous owner in all of history has been mentally or physically strong enough to wear that many miraculous at one time,

 "Really?"

 "Yes, you are truly something else, Luka," He smiled, making Luka play with his hands in a shy manner. "Now why don't we talk about something more fun? Do you have plans for the summer holidays?"

 "Well.. actually... I do,"

------------------------------------------------------------------

Next Chapter: Coming soon

[hotpinkhoshi]

the pact (5)

pairing: jinyoung x reader

genre: romance, smut, a lil angst

warnings: explicit sex, cursing, unprotected sex, dirty talk, some secondhand embarrassment

word count: 6.8k

summary: you desperately need to get over your decade-long crush on lim jaebeom, and your close friend jinyoung needs to get over his ex—so the two of you make an arrangement: just sex, no feelings. what could go wrong?

a/n: hi loves! thank you as always for your kind and supportive messages regarding the last part! if you didn’t see my post, you can now track the tag #thepactfic in order to keep up with updates and future parts. that being said, i’ve officially decided the story will be a total of 6 parts. one more full part after this! please let me know how you’re liking it and if you have any thoughts, feelings, questions etc don’t be afraid to shoot me a message  ❤️

↳ index here

“I gotta be honest,” Jaebeom said, fingers tapping against the cafe table. “I was surprised to hear from you.” 

“Yeah,” you began, folding your hands on your lap and offering him a kind smile. “I- well, I wanted to apologize for leaving you hanging that night at the club…”

Even though he’d done it to you plenty of times. Texted you, asking what you were up to, until inevitably, he stopped responding a few messages in. Danced with you when you came to one of his DJing gigs only to leave with someone else. Even today, he’d shown up ten minutes late. It was about time somebody did the same to him. Still, you couldn’t help your conscience. 

Jaebeom shrugged. “That’s alright. Although I’m starting to think you’ve been avoiding me.” There was a playfulness to his tone, but you had a feeling it had been a shot to his pride. He wasn’t used to girls standing him up. 

“Maybe… a little. That’s actually why I wanted to meet you today.” 

It had been Sana’s idea, which surprised you both. She’d come home from trivia half an hour later than you the other night, knocking softly on the door to check if you were still awake. 

After a long talk, you finally admitted your feelings for Jinyoung to someone other than yourself. She didn’t reassure you that he felt the same way, because you both knew he probably didn’t. If Jinyoung said he was going to do something, he did it. 

You had no reason to think you were anything more than a friend to him now, with some added bonuses. 

She did say, however, that you needed to talk to Jaebeom. As much as she hated the way he treated you, you needed closure in order to completely close that chapter. You agreed, and here you were. 

You’d picked a very public place during your lunch break from work, just so that you didn’t feel tempted to fall into his trap again. The weird thing was, as he sat in front of you, something had changed. Your feelings for him lingered like an aftertaste, nowhere near as powerful as they had been even a month ago. 

It didn’t compare to the real thing, you realized. 

“I’m sure you know this,” you began, staring down at your fingernails, “but I’ve liked you for a long time. Like, a really long time. Since we were fourteen.”

“I know.” Jaebeom’s words made you finally look up, locking eyes with him. “I mean, you’re a lot of things, Y/N, but subtle is not one of them.” He smiled at you in the way that would’ve normally had your stomach fluttering. “That’s why I was so confused when you started blowing me off.”

“Yeah. I guess I just, I was tired of waiting for you to like me back. Because you never did, right? At least not the way I liked you. So I decided that it was time for me to move on, finally, and now…” you took a deep breath, feeling like you were talking more to yourself than to Jaebeom, “now I think I found someone that I really like. It feels different.” 

You paused to take in Jaebeom’s expression. He wasn’t hurt, but he seemed confused. He had every right to be. He probably thought you were a little bit crazy for sharing all of this, but you needed to get it off of your chest.

“I did like you, Y/N.” 

“You what?” you asked, blinking at him. “When?”

First Jinyoung, now this? You didn’t know how many more confessions you could take. 

Jaebeom shrugged, sipping from his espresso. “In high school. I mean, surely you could tell? I was always asking to borrow a pencil in math class… I figured you didn’t think I was that forgetful.” 

You remembered being tortured in that Calculus class. His seat was diagonally in front of you, allowing you the perfect view to his flawless profile for forty minutes every single day. Whenever he asked you for a pencil, you had to count to ten to stop thinking about his fingers brushing against yours. 

“I didn’t… I didn’t know.” 

“Well,” he said, his lips quirking up. “It’s true. But I liked a lot of girls—it was high school. I was going to ask you out after graduation, before you and Jinyoung went off to university. But Jinyoung flipped on me, telling me not to mess around with you, and not to ask you out unless I wanted it to last forever. Scared the shit out of me. So I backed off.” 

Suddenly your throat was bone dry, and the coffee wasn’t helping. It was a lot to digest, finding that Jaebeom had returned your feelings after all, if only for a few years. You and probably a dozen other girls. Still, you’d never thought you had a chance, especially not back then.

“Did Jinyoung ever talk about me?” you found yourself asking. It wouldn’t do you any good to find out just how deep his feelings for you ran, considering they were probably long gone, but the masochist in you wanted to know. For some reason, you cared more about that than Jaebeom’s former crush. 

Jaebeom barked out a laugh. “Did he? Fuck, he barely ever stopped. He had a thing for you, you know? I mean, he never told me outright, but I could tell. It pissed him off whenever he’d catch me staring down your shirt at lunch and he’d give me the cold shoulder for the next day and a half.”

How oblivious had you been in high school? You’d always been so busy reading and studying, maybe if you’d lifted your nose out of those books you would have noticed. You spent more time with Jinyoung than Jaebeom, but both boys were a part of your daily life. It had all been right under your nose. 

“Is it him?” Jaebeom asked after a moment of your silence. “The guy you like? I saw you leave with him that night, kinda figured maybe he’d finally grown some balls and gone for it with you.” 

“Y-yeah, actually.” You rubbed the back of your neck. That hollowness of your missed opportunity was still heavy in your chest. You missed him so much it hurt. 

Jaebeom nodded, tongue running over his teeth. “Well, good for him. It’s about time.” He didn’t seem jealous or bothered by the idea of you with Jinyoung, which just cemented what you already knew—his feelings were never as intense as yours. 

And whatever he had going on with that girl, the one from his bathroom mirror selfies, you just felt bad for her now. You weren’t jealous, you felt pity. Pity because she was probably a lot like you, expecting more from Jaebeom than he was ready to give. 

There was an unspoken tension between the two of you now, but you felt different… like you’d finally cut off that loose end that had been hanging around you for years. You looked at Jaebeom in front of you, the person you’d convinced yourself you were in love with, and all you could think about was Jinyoung. 

Jinyoung wouldn’t have been late. He would’ve been early, sat in a corner booth with coffee and your favorite blueberry muffin waiting. Maybe he would have teased you for making him wait, but he’d still let you have your muffin with a little convincing. 

You missed him so much. 

But you knew if you were going to get over Jinyoung, you at least needed to be finished with Jaebeom first. It was almost comical the way your timing always seemed to be wrong. Why couldn’t your heart just be on time for once?

“I should go,” you said finally, standing up. “Thanks for the coffee.” 

“No problem.” Jaebeom stood as well, digging in his pocket for cash to leave a tip on the table. “And Y/N?”

You raised your brows. “Yeah?”

“Tell Jinyoungie I said hi, and if he wants to catch up…” Jaebeom ran his fingers through his hair, one of his nervous habits. 

You smiled. “I will. I’ll see you around, okay? Take care of yourself, Jaebeom.” 

Jaebeom, despite everything, was not a bad man. Deep down, he was good, which was what had always made it so hard for you to leave him behind. You’d always think of the time he walked you home from school when your mom got stuck late at work, the summer he worked at the animal rescue shelter, the way he used to snort when he laughed at Jinyoung’s jokes, and a million more fragments of his soul he’d let you see over the years. 

But at the end of the day, he wasn’t the one for you. You’d spent so many years making excuses, covering your eyes when he showed you the parts that didn’t fit with your idea of him, but you were ready to see him as he was now. You hoped someday he would find happiness, love, and satisfaction. It just wouldn’t be with you. 

As you walked out of the cafe and the door clicked behind you, you felt that door in your heart finally slide closed. And it felt good. 

~~~

Three long days later, and Jinyoung was finally home. 

It killed you that you couldn’t see him right away. Right after he got home on Wednesday night, he’d passed out from jet lag and you’d had to work late the next night. His body was still adjusting and he’d gone to bed right about the same time you got home.

Your schedules lined up, at last, by Friday evening. Jinyoung had the rest of the week off after working through the weekend, but his sleep schedule was so backwards that he ended up sleeping through most of your waking hours. He was mostly adjusted by Friday, though, and you rushed over straight after work without even stopping for dinner. 

You’d decided that you needed to end it with Jinyoung. There had been rules, after all, to this pact you’d made. You’d broken one already, and in doing so, you’d broken another—honesty. But you knew you needed to see him one last time. Just for closure. Then you could move on. 

Jinyoung didn’t suspect anything, as far as you knew. You’d held up your promise to send him a picture every day, with varying degrees of naughtiness, and even FaceTimed a few times. The time difference made it difficult but… you’d managed. 

It was nothing compared to how he looked in the flesh, though. When he opened the door, you felt those damn butterflies wake up, low in your stomach. 

He didn’t look as tired as you thought he would. In fact, he looked pretty damn awake to you. 

You barely got inside before he was pushing you against the closed door, crowding you into the barrier with his own body. With his lips pressing into yours, he effectively had you trapped. 

But you didn’t mind. You’d missed this so much it only took you a split second before you wrapped your arms around him, relishing in the heat that came from his body. 

As soon as he parted from your lips, he trailed kisses down your neck to the collar of your work button-up. “Hi,” you breathed, digging your hands into his shoulder blades where you held him. 

“Hi,” he said into your skin, fingers already working at the buttons of your shirt. 

“How was your-“ your words were cut off by a groan as Jinyoung sucked at a particularly sensitive spot on your neck.

Jinyoung's response was a frustrated grunt as he fumbled with the plastic holding your shirt together, and all you could do was gasp when he tore the shirt open, buttons clinking to the floor. 

You stared at him with wide eyes, mouth gaping open. 

“I’ll buy you another one.” 

Without another word, he dove back in to your neck, lips nibbling and sucking at your flesh. You completely forgot about your ruined shirt when he began grinding his hips into yours, his hardness already pressing into your thigh. 

“Missed you… so much…” you whispered, threading your fingers through his hair and inhaling the scent of crisp summer fruit. “You smell so good. Is this shampoo new?”

“Stole some from the hotel,” he replied, punctuated by a bite to your neck that made you shiver. 

“All that…” You slid your hand down his body, fingertips brushing over his belt buckle until you were able to cup your hand over the obvious bulge in his pants, “hard work packing… and you still stole hotel toiletries.”

Jinyoung made a noise deep in his throat, almost a growl as you began massaging your palm against him, his face still buried in your neck. “Don’t tease. I’ve been hard since you said you were coming over.” 

You smirked, running your tongue over your lips. “I’ve been thinking about this since the moment you left, Jinyoung. Trust me, I’m not teasing.” 

Finally, Jinyoung pulled back enough to crush your lips together in a heated, messy kiss. You had missed his taste, the warmth of his mouth colliding with yours, the way he ran his tongue over your lip before he nipped it. 

Your hands quickly undid his belt and zipper, freeing him from his jeans just enough for you to wrap your hand around his member over the fabric of his briefs. He was hard as ever, pulsing slightly in your grip. 

As Jinyoung licked into your mouth, you began a slow pace massaging his cock, fingers following the outline pressed into your hand. You’d barely traced the length of him five times before he was moaning and rutting his hips into your hand. 

“Fuck,” he said, pulling back from your lips but keeping his forehead pressed into yours. 

You squeezed his length once, then twice, and felt Jinyoung’s cock pulse, even through the barrier of cotton. A feeling you usually only felt when he was inside of you. 

“Shit, no, no-“

Jinyoung inhaled sharply, fist coming up to slam into the wall next to your shoulder, trying to pull his hips from the contact of your hand. You barely realized what was happening until you looked at him to find his eyes squeezed shut, jaw slack as an orgasm wracked through him. 

You gulped, your hand slowly falling away once you were sure he’d come down from his high. Though when he opened his eyes, they were filled with regret and shame. 

“God, I’m sorry, I-“ he started, looking down at his crotch, then up at you. “I can’t believe I just…”

“You just came in your pants.”

It took just about everything in you to keep your face straight. He’d never come that fast, at least not with you. Jinyoung dropped his head onto your shoulder with a breathy laugh. 

“I’m so sorry.”

You bit back a giggle, sliding your arms around his waist, fingers sliding up the back of his black tee. “Jinyoung, it’s fine. We have all night, you know.” 

“Let me make it up to you,” he said, deep and low near your ear before he pulled away. His face was flushed from his orgasm, all the way to the tips of his ears. Just from the look in his eyes, you knew he had a plan. 

“Okay… what did you have in mind?” 

Instead of granting you an answer, he slid his hands up the curves of your waist, fingers dragging over the lace of your bra. He kept his eyes on you as he pushed your shirt off of your shoulders, just a useless scrap of fabric now that he’d ripped the buttons off. 

Then he dropped to his knees, fingertips trailing down your skin until they played with the waistband of your pants. You hoped he wouldn’t rip these—they’d been rather expensive. 

He took care with the button and zipper, seemingly reading your mind, then tugged the pants down your thighs to pool at your ankles. He removed one shoe, then the other, so that he could allow you to step out of your bottoms. This left you in just your panties and bra, which of course he’d seen you in before, dozens of times, but he was looking at you like you were brand new to him. 

“Open,” he told you, scooting close until his face was level with your hips. You obeyed easily, earning you a cocky smirk. “Good girl.” 

Your head fell back against the door as you stared down at Jinyoung. He’d gone from bashful and embarrassed to this, heating you from the inside out, all with just his gaze. 

As always, he didn’t give you what you wanted straight away. He brushed his lips over the sensitive skin of your stomach, kissing every curve and line, even those spots you hated to see in the mirror. He’d made you forget all about that, only focused on feeling. 

You shivered as his breath fanned over your skin and goosebumps rose on your arms. His lips traveled down to your thighs, skipping over your center because of course, he needed to keep you on your toes. 

“Jinyoung…” you whined, your hands resting on his shoulders. “Please.”

He looked up, mouth still pressing into your inner thigh, and he smiled. He loved to have you like this, and you couldn’t deny your favorite place to be was wrapped around his finger. 

“Hm.. please what?” he challenged, now teasing the waistband of your panties with his fingers. “What do you want me to do?”

You huffed out a breath. “Jinyoung,“ you complained, “eat me out before I go insane.” 

Jinyoung made you wait only a few more torturous moments before he slid the lacy garment down your thighs to your knees, eyes glued to your center as soon as it was revealed to him. He had the nerve to lick his lips. 

“Pretty,” he muttered, placing his thumbs on either side of your folds to open you up for him. He leaned in, hot breath against your clit just before he latched on.

It wasn’t like you hadn’t touched yourself since he’d been gone—hell, he’d been the one to bring you to orgasm twice thanks to FaceTime—but it wasn’t even in the same league as Jinyoung’s mouth on you. 

One second, you felt like you had all the power, the next, he had you practically melting into the door, grabbing his hair and begging for more. The harder he worked into your clit, the more you arched your hips towards him, desperate and whimpering. 

Jinyoung knew all of your spots and it turned out, he wasn’t the only one that had trouble keeping his orgasm at bay. You felt the familiar waves of heat surging through your body as his tongue flicked back and forth over your clit, a quick and powerful pace that sent you barreling towards your climax. 

You cried out as you came. Core clenching around nothing, you jerked your hips into his face, completely overwhelmed with bliss. Jinyoung was good to you, licking and sucking until you calmed under his touch. 

Unable to hold yourself up with shaky knees, you slid down the door until you were sitting, level with Jinyoung. You let him take you into his arms, kissing the side of your face and stroking your back. 

“What are we, teenagers?” you asked once your body stopped twitching from the aftershocks of your orgasm. 

Jinyoung chuckled softly, pulling back to look at you and smoothing his thumb over your cheek. “Feels like it.”

Now that you weren’t quite so consumed by lust, you were able to appreciate him up close, for the first time since his trip. He must have gotten some sun, judging by the slightly darkened tone of his skin. There were no bags under his eyes, not like you would’ve had if you flew across the world. He looked even better than the last time you’d seen him, which was almost infuriating. 

Just as you were going to scold him for being so handsome, your stomach growled, loud enough for both of you to hear. Jinyoung glanced down, then back up at you, an amused smile on his lips. 

“Hungry?” 

Your cheeks flushed pink and you nodded. “Maybe a little.” 

Jinyoung nodded back at his kitchen and shrugged. “How about takeout? I don’t really have anything in the fridge, still need to hit the store.” 

“Sounds perfect,” you answered. “But we both need new clothes first.” 

----

An hour later, you were dressed in a pair of Jinyoung’s sweatpants and one of his shirts, and he was dressed in a similarly comfortable outfit. He sat next to you on the couch, slurping on ramen. 

You’d ordered enough food for ten people, you realized, after you covered his coffee table with plates and containers that you each picked from. 

“So what you’re saying is everyone loved you,” you said, wiping at your mouth with your napkin. 

Jinyoung chuckled, shaking his head. “Not necessarily. But you know, the girls especially were very interested in our company. One of the convention center employees kept fawning over me. Julie, I think her name was…”

You narrowed your eyes. “Oh, really? Julie?” You pressed your lips together, grumbling to yourself as you reached for the pork belly. “Stupid name.” 

Jinyoung watched you with an amused smile, setting his ramen down on the coffee table to wrap an arm around your waist. “Are you jealous?” 

You ignored him, shoveling a piece of pork into your mouth, looking anywhere but his face. He took the plate out of your hands, setting it down on the table. You whined in protest, mouth full of food. 

“You don’t have any reason to be jealous.” 

He was right--you didn’t. He wasn’t yours, you didn’t have any sort of claim on him. He could’ve taken Julie back to his hotel room if he’d wanted to, and you wouldn’t have had any good reason to be upset. 

“You’re the only one I thought about,” he said, lips brushing the side of your jaw. 

Why did he have to make it so hard, saying things like that? He thought about you, but not like that. He thought about your body, about the sex, but that was all this was. 

You opened your mouth, ready to tell him you wanted to talk about your arrangement, when he beat you to it. 

“That reminds me, actually, I have something for you.” With a quick kiss to your cheek, he stood from the couch and jogged out of the living room towards his room. 

You sighed, head falling back against the couch cushion. You needed to let this go, and you needed to do it now. You could feel yourself falling for him the more that he looked at you, touched you, kissed you. Soon you’d be in a hole you wouldn’t be able to dig yourself out of. 

When Jinyoung came back and sat next to you, he placed a book in your lap. It took you all of three seconds to recognize it, and you were glad you no longer had food in your mouth or you would have choked. 

“You didn’t!” you gasped, grabbing for the book and flipping it back and forth. “This doesn’t come out for another six months!” 

Jinyoung shrugged. “Well, they had some advanced copies lying around and I thought you’d kill me if I didn’t steal one for you.” 

“Yeah, I would have.” 

You’d talked about this book no less than twenty times in Jinyoung’s presence. It wasn’t his cup of tea, but you’d practically been counting down the days for this particular novel, a follow-up to a thriller you’d flown through as soon as it came out last year. 

“Thank you,” you told him, finally looking away from the book in your hands to Jinyoung’s face. He was watching you, corner of his lips quirked. 

“You’re welcome.” 

You stared back down at the book, running your fingers over the cover. Although he hadn’t paid a cent for this, it was one of the best surprises you’d ever received. Your fingers were itching to open it and dive in. 

“You want to start reading it now, don’t you?” 

Giving him a sheepish smile, you nodded. “Yeah.” 

Jinyoung shrugged. “You can. I’ve got plenty that I need to read, I’ll join you.” 

Half an hour later, the two of you were still on the couch, but you were laying with your head at one end and your feet on Jinyoung’s lap at the other end. He had a book resting on top of your ankles and you were already three chapters into your new book. 

You normally hated reading around people, too easily distracted just by the presence of another person, but this felt so natural. You wondered if you’d be able to go back to normal again, after you ended it. 

You’d find a way to live without the affection he’d given you. After all, it hadn’t been real. Your arrangement had served its purpose—you could finally say you were over Jaebeom, and as far as you knew, Jinyoung was over Yeri. He never talked about her, but he didn’t seem particularly torn up over her anymore. 

You wiggled your toes when Jinyoung began running his fingertips over the top of your foot to your ankle, then back again, just a mindless graze over your skin. You looked up over the top of your book, watching the way his eyes followed the words on the page he was reading, brows together in concentration. 

Someday, some other girl would be the one to see him like this, reading on the couch in the evening light while surrounded by greasy takeout. You hoped this girl would love him the way he deserved and wouldn’t take it for granted like Yeri obviously had. 

You stared back down at your book once Jinyoung caught you staring and pretended as if you’d just been spacing out, taking your bottom lip in between your teeth. 

“What are you thinking?” Jinyoung asked. 

“Huh?” You looked up, shaking your head. “Nothing. Why?” 

“You look sad.” He set his book down on his lap, resting both of his hands on your shins. “What are you thinking about?” 

“Nothing,” you said once more. If this was your last night with Jinyoung, you weren’t going to waste it wallowing and thinking about the end. You could pretend, just for the night, that this was real. “Just a sad part in the book.” 

“Already?” 

You nodded. “Could use a kiss.” 

Jinyoung pressed his lips together, considering it. “Huh... that’s an interesting suggestion. You think it’d make you less sad?” 

“Mhm.” 

“Ah,” he nodded, stroking the exposed skin of your ankle with his thumb, “It’s worth a try, then.” 

In an easy movement, he was shifting your legs off of his lap and crawling over you until he hovered over your body. You’d missed having his weight on you like this—you always felt so safe underneath of him. 

“I missed you,” you admitted, once his lips were only a centimeter from yours. “Not just the sex. I missed you.”

Jinyoung shifted back enough to look at your face, his eyes searching your features for something, you weren’t sure what. “Yeah? I missed you too.” 

You slid your hands up the fabric of his shirt, grazing over the warm skin of his back. You wanted to say something, anything, but all you could think about was how somehow, your heart had become entirely his.

You needed to show him, just once, how you felt. 

So you tipped your head up to kiss him, as softly as you ever had. Kissed him with all the love you could muster, as scary as it was to let it pour out. 

Jinyoung was gentle with you in return, his soft, polite lips melting into yours. It was almost tragic how well your lips fit together, knowing you’d never feel it again after tonight. 

Your hands trailed up his back, pushing his tee up to his shoulders in the process. Jinyoung sat up, parting from your lips just long enough to remove his shirt. 

Then he was kissing you again, hand resting on your jaw as his tongue pushed past your lips. You moaned, savoring the taste of him, even if the kiss tasted a little bit like cheap takeout. 

“Wait, wait,” Jinyoung said against your lips as soon as you made a move to push down his sweatpants. “Let’s go to the bedroom. Wanna spread you out.”

You shivered at his words and nodded, letting him pull you up off the couch by the hand and lead you back to the bedroom. 

It was much neater than it was the last time you’d seen it. In fact, it was spotless as ever. No suitcases lying on the ground or shampoo bottles littering the bed. 

Jinyoung removed your shirt the proper way this time, then unclasped your bra a moment later to allow it to fall to the floor. Goosebumps covered your chest but the pure heat in Jinyoung’s gaze got your blood pumping faster, hotter. 

He lifted you without much warning, guiding your legs around his waist as he carried you the rest of the way into his room, falling onto the bed with you trapped underneath of him. You squeezed your legs around his waist, desperate for some contact between your thighs. 

“So… god damn beautiful,” Jinyoung whispered, placing a chaste kiss to your lips before he brushed soft kisses across your face. Your forehead, each cheek, then your nose. It crinkled in response, and you were blessed with a fond smile from Jinyoung. 

The rest of your clothes seemed to fall away, an act that had become as natural as breathing for the two of you. Jinyoung whispered words of praise as he moved down your body, hooking a leg over his shoulder. 

His tongue found your clit naturally, delving deep into your folds to taste the arousal that had gathered there. With each gasp and moan, he worked harder, wanting you needy and wet for him. 

You felt around for his hands, needing something to anchor you to earth while he sucked at your clit for the second time that night, the pressure just enough to drive you mad. 

“Oh, fuck—Jinyoung, right there. Feels so good.” Your hips rolled, matching the rhythm of the heavenly way he was licking into you. 

He moaned into your core, the vibration like a shock of electricity against your clit. Your hips jerked up towards his face and he squeezed your hands, as if telling you to let go. 

Jinyoung brought you over the edge for the second time that night, your thighs clenching around his shoulders as you repeated his name, over and over. 

Your whole body went limp afterwards, only vaguely registering Jinyoung kissing your skin, nuzzling his face into your thighs. 

“Perfect. You don’t even know how stunning you are, like you were made for me,” he spoke against your skin, thumbs stroking the backs of your hands. 

When you recovered enough to open your eyes, you tugged Jinyoung’s hands until he got the hint, crawling back up your body. His lips were on you again in an instant, tongue tasting and exploring like it was the first time. 

Just tonight, you told yourself. Just tonight. 

Jinyoung parted from you after a moment, dipping his head down to leave hot kisses across your chest. Your hands pushed into his hair, moaning out when he sucked one of your nipples into his mouth.

You arched your back as his tongue drew tight circles around the hardened peak, shameless moans and whimpers falling from your lips. 

“Jinyoung, please,” you begged, tugging at the locks of hair between your fingers. “Need you inside.”

Then he looked at you again in a way that made your heart clench. It was only because he was lost in the moment, nothing more. But it felt like he was looking deeper, right into the center of your heart to see the truth there. 

“Y/N…” he started, bringing a hand to the side of your face. His fingertips ran down your cheek to your chin, where he pressed the pad of his thumb into your lower lip. Something about it made you want to cry. 

So you cut off whatever he wanted to say with a kiss, a bruising pressure that you hoped let him know that this was the only place you wanted to be. Here, underneath of his body, you couldn’t imagine anything better. 

It was easy, automatic, the way he angled your knee so that he could sheathe himself inside of you. Slowly, inch by inch, you accepted him. Your walls were slick and ready for him, but it was still a stretch that you’d missed.

“Shit,” Jinyoung whispered against your lips, finally pulling back and taking a deep inhale. “You feel so perfect.” 

You groaned as he bottomed out, burying your face into his neck. You whispered his name if only because it was the only thing you could think as he started rocking his hips into yours, a deep but unbearably slow pace. But this was what you wanted; you needed it to last. Forever, if it could. 

You felt so vulnerable now, knowing that this was it. Jinyoung didn’t know that, and maybe that wasn’t fair, but you couldn’t keep it up. You couldn’t fall more and more in love with him every day, and only get this part of him. There would come a day where you couldn’t take it anymore, and by that point the damage might be too painful to reverse. 

It was better to end it now. But for tonight, you’d take as much as you could. 

Jinyoung began a consistent but torturous pace, the tip of his cock reaching as deep inside of you as you’d ever felt him each time he pushed inside, past the tight resistance of your walls. His free hand trailed down your body, fingertips ghosting southbound over the center of your chest. 

This was all you wanted, all you needed. 

“Please,” you found yourself pleading. Your nails traced angry marks down his back, marks you wanted to remain there forever if only so that he would think about you when this was all over. “Jinyoung…” 

“I’m right here, angel.” His lips found your ear and he kissed the sensitive spot underneath, letting you hear the breathy pants falling from his lips as he picked up the pace of his hips. His hand drifted over, only a few inches, until it was covering your heart.

“Yours,” you whispered, practically inaudible, half hoping he didn’t hear. It was his, it had been for longer than you knew. 

Something about this egged Jinyoung on, his pace growing stronger inside of you and his hips pinning you into the bed roughly. Without any warning, Jinyoung rolled the two of you over so that he was underneath of you and sat up. 

You maneuvered your legs to allow you to kneel over his lap, your thighs straddling his hips and hardly missing a beat as you began to ride him. When you stole a glance at Jinyoung’s face, you wished you could have taken a photo. 

He was completely blissed out, head tipped back and eyes squeezed shut. You reached for his hair, guiding his head forward so that you could look at him. You needed to see him. 

Jinyoung held your hips as you placed your hands on his chest, allowing yourself some leverage, especially when he started to buck up against you each time you slid back over him. You dug your nails into his chest and moaned out, louder and louder as he fucked into you. 

“Look at me,” you said, commanding his attention back to your face. You were met with so much lust that it made your walls clench around him. 

The way he looked at you sent heat through your limbs, even as your thighs started to shake from the way you rode him. Jinyoung touched you all over, hands roaming your back and down to your ass, squeezing it within his palms. 

“Oh God, don’t… don’t stop,” you pleaded, head falling forward to rest against his forehead. You looked into his eyes, clouded with desire. Jinyoung reached for your hand on his chest, sliding it over the few inches until it rested over the left side of his chest, right over his heart. 

“Yours,” he whispered, then brought your hand up to his lips to kiss your fingertips. 

You closed your eyes and felt a tear slide down your cheek, so you turned your head to the side so he wouldn’t see. He didn’t know what he was saying, he didn’t know what it meant. Caught up in the ecstacy of the way your bodies moved together, the pleasure it brought the two of you. 

His hips jerked up, hard, forcing his cock deep against your inner walls. He did it again and again until you were squeezing his hand, tight enough to hurt, but you needed your release. You were desperate now. 

The complicated tornado of emotions inside of you was getting to be too much, you wanted it to be over. You needed it to be over, so you could figure out what the hell you were going to do. 

“Need more. Fuck me, Jinyoung. Please,” you whispered, deliberately squeezing your walls around his cock. He groaned low, wrapping his arms around your waist to tip the two of you forward until you were on your back again, knees locked around his waist. 

His hands found yours, lacing your fingers together as he held your arms above your head, pressed deep into the mattress as he drilled into you. “Mine,” he told you, eyes locked onto yours. He didn’t know just how true that was. 

You knew you were close by the way your thighs started trembling, tightening where they rested on either side of his hips. Jinyoung sensed it as well, picking up his pace. His jaw tightened with the effort, a bead of sweat dripping down his neck. 

“Oh fuck, you gonna come for me?” he asked, running his tongue over his lips. “Come on, baby, come for me again. Need to feel you.” 

His words went straight to your center, where his body met yours, sending you tipping over the edge. You arched your back, not caring how loud you cried out. Your hands tightened around his as your entire body pulsed around him, locking your legs around his waist. 

Jinyoung must have been encouraged on by your orgasm, as you felt his thrusts become more and more off rhythm. He let go of your hands and buried his face into your neck as he filled you up, letting out a guttural groan into your collarbone. 

You crossed your ankles behind his back, not ready to let him pull out of you just yet. With your arms and legs wrapped around him, you tucked your face into the crook of his neck and willed yourself not to cry. 

It’d be okay, you knew it would be, but right now you just needed him to hold you. You’d find a way to forget this someday, the perfect way he fit inside of you, the way he made your heart pound without even trying. 

Your efforts were unsuccessful. Once Jinyoung pulled away, he reached up to wipe wetness from your cheeks. “Did you miss me that much, angel?” 

“Shut up,” you said, averting your eyes. “My period must be coming… hormones or whatever…”

“It’s okay,” he told you, lips brushing across your cheek to collect your tears. “You don’t have to explain.”

Jinyoung left you with a hollow feeling as he pulled out of you, falling to lay on his side next to you, feet at the pillows. Propping up on one of his elbows, he brushed your hair away from your face. 

“You’re okay though, right?” 

You nodded, not having the confidence to answer out loud. But he backed off, though you could tell from his expression he didn’t completely believe you. With a kiss to your forehead, he climbed off of the bed to grab a cloth to clean you up. 

“Wait-” you reached out for him. “Stay.” 

“Gotta get you cleaned up,” Jinyoung replied, the corner of his lips lifting in a smile.

“Just-” you sighed, reaching for his arm to tug him back to you. “Just a few minutes. Please?” 

Jinyoung stared down at you, you knew he was trying to read your expression but you prayed that he wouldn’t find the truth there in your features. “Okay.” 

He laid back down, pulling you close as you curled up into him, soaking up all of the warmth he could offer to you. You tucked your head into his chest, eyes closed to keep your emotions trapped behind a wall, however shaky it may have been. 

Just tonight, you told yourself. Just tonight, you could pretend. 

[dreaminpeaches]

🍬 Any fun facts about Bonnie?? c:

Okay, so quick recon, thanks for sending your ask btw, but remember when I said that Bonnie's hair was white, yeah its blue now because one of her fave anime characters has blue hair anyways on the other facts:

Bonnie became semi famous online when she was younger for the AMVs she would make a post online, she wasn't famous at school or anything but at cons, she would get recognized for her talent

Bonnie started to volunteer at cons when she was 14, on the first job she cosplayed as Navi from Zelda so people would know that she would be there to help them find panels, events, and even artists at cons

Bonnie lived pretty rich growing up but her mother wouldnt let her use any of the money to buy useless things like video games, cosplay materials, manga or anything that wasn't towards her classic ballet career, so Bonnie did odd jobs around town for money like babysitting, house sitting and even pet sitting

Despite having a big house, Bonnie's mom NEVER let any of Bonnie's friends sleepover or even step into the house, only people allowed in were people Bonnie's mom approved of, which were only stuck up snobby rich kids whose parents could help boost Bonnie's ballet career, the friends she made at cons where never allowed in

In addition to the last fact, Bonnie would often stay over at her friends' houses (the friends she made at cons), she would tell her mom she was sleeping over and would end up staying multiple days because she REALLY didn't want to go home because this Bonnie's mom kind of caught on to the idea and forbid Bonnie from sleepovers because of it taking away precious time from her ballet career.

Even though her mom was really strict, Bonnie never dislike dancing, dancing was one of the few things (other than cosplay) that made her feel like an actual person (if i'm making any sense), like she could truly express herself

Bonnie has a secret passion for DJing born from her love of AMV and general music, but her mother would never approve of her DJing, so the only time Bonnie could practice her skills without being interrupted or scolded was at anime cons

Because of her own mom being such a weird woman, Bonnie feels a more motherly connection to Beau's mom, and is quite jealous that he has such a nice and cool mom.

In fact, Bonnie is quite jealous of Beau's whole family dynamic at least his current one, Bonnie always wanted to be a part of a big family that loved each other and accepts one another no matter what, this was a feeling Bonnie could only experience before through anime (like One piece) and her found family that she formed through the con scene, but now she gets to be apart of an actual loving family

[vito-mendoza]

Task: Character Playlist Deep Dive

Playlist: Vito Mendoza’s Character Playlist

Number of Songs: 15 (as of July 2021) 

Length: 57:42 (as of July 2021)

Triggers: N/A

Track 1: When I Grow Up- The Pussycat Dolls

Even though the song isn’t an exact fit for his life, it sums up his childhood hopes and dreams of being a famous actor pretty well. He’s been dreaming big ever since he saw his fist trip to the movie theater to see Mission: Impossible. He’s had the drive to make it big for a long time, but the question of the hour is whether he has the skill.

Track 2: Miami- Will Smith

Despite the fact that he was born in the Philippines, Vito considers Miami to be his true hometown in many respects. It was the place where he spent most of his childhood, the place where he fostered his love of acting, and the place where he first started falling in love with life. Even though he hasn’t lived in Miami since he left for college in 2008, every time he returns to visit his family, he feels like he never left. 

Track 3: Hello, Brooklyn- All Time Low

Vito moved to Brooklyn with one of his college roommates after graduating college in 2012. It was in Brooklyn that he really got into DJing and started to do it for money. Vito has always been the type to live life to the fullest, and this song is an expression of that sentiment. He made Brooklyn his second home and partied it up while he lived there. 

Track 4: Beverly Hills- Weezer

Even though Vito has wanted to be an actor since he was 7 years old, he still has his insecurities about it. Specifically, he worries that he won’t fit in with actors who came from money. Vito wants to be amongst the elite, but comes from a completely different world, one without any glitz or glamor. This is part of the reason why it took him until 2020 to make his big move. 

Track 5: Best Day Of My Life- American Authors

Vito considers the day he officially made his move out west to be one of the best days of his life. As much as he liked Brooklyn and the friends he made there, acting in student films and off-Broadway shows wasn’t where he wanted to be in life. He didn’t know anyone in California except his roommate, who he had only met in person once. Moving was his chance to start anew and fully realize his dreams. 

Track 6: I Gotta Feeling- Black Eyed Peas

Once he decided to make the move out west, Vito fell in love with Santa Monica. The palm trees and beach reminded him of Miami, and it was close enough to L.A. that he could get to auditions with relative ease. From the first day, he had a feeling that he was going to like California. This song is meant to be an expression of Vito having a good time and making new memories.

Track 7: Go DJ- Lil Wayne

Vito has yet to land a full-time acting gig, so DJing has been his primary source of income. This is a song he’ll play to himself when he needs motivation. It’s a reminder to himself that if all else fails, people still think he’s good at DJing. After all, he wouldn’t be working at a club 4 nights per week if people didn’t like his mixes.

Track 8: Don’t Stop The Music- Rihanna

This song is one of Vito’s favorite songs to play in the club. It’s one of those songs that gets the crowd up and dancing; no one can resist a good Rihanna song. Acting is his first passion, but he relates to the message of this song: leaving the stress of life behind you and dancing to good music. It’s songs like this that remind him what got him into music in the first place. 

Track 9: Club Can’t Handle Me- Flo Rida & David Guetta

This song is a combination of a pep-talk and a song to amp up the club. This is one of those songs that makes Vito feel like he’s on top of the world. Playing this song at Circle Bar makes him feel invincible. Even though he doesn’t live a lavish lifestyle like Flo Rida and David Guetta, Vito knows how to party and how to liven up a party through music. 

Track 10: Sorry for Party Rocking- LMFAO

As a DJ, Vito goes hard and goes loud. His neighbors over the years, in both Brooklyn and Santa Monica, have had to put up with a lot of his musical antics. All he can ever really say form himself is “Sorry!” because he’s not going to stop anytime soon. Even though he doesn’t drink as excessively as LMFAO, nor does he hook up with women like they do, this song makes for another fun song to amp up the club. 

Track 11: Sour Patch Kids- Bryce Vine

Being an adult is hard. Since moving to California, Vito has started to notice how much he struggles with money. Sometimes he needs to get money off his mind and just kick back and relax like he did when he was a kid. He feels very nostalgic for his childhood, especially the parts when he didn’t have any responsibilities or cares in the world. 

Track 12: Crush- David Archuleta

Vito felt himself crushing on Verity shortly after their blind date. As time went on, these feelings only grew stronger. He spent the first two months of knowing her wondering if she shared his feelings or if this was all one-sided and hopeless. Despite these worries, his feelings didn’t wane. His crush wasn’t going away any time soon. 

Track 13: What A Man Gotta Do- The Jonas Brothers

After a few months of hanging out and having little dates with Verity, Vito realized that he didn’t want to be just friends with her. Her kiss had him hooked, and he wanted more. He wanted to be with her, labels and all, and if she wanted him, he was all hers. Turns out all he had to do to make this a reality was ask. 

Track 14: Only Wanna Be With You- Post Malone

This is another song that isn’t an exact fit but has an overall relatable message: wanting to be with one person and one person only. Even though he and Verity have led very different lives, they’re still able to get along and make their relationship work. He doesn’t care if he’s foolish for becoming this attached to her so soon into the relationship, because he’s happy and that’s all that matters to him. The reason this version is on the playlist rather than the original is because Vito is a bigger fan of Post Malone (he says “no disrespect to Hootie, though”).

Track 15: Let Me Love You (Until You Learn To Love Yourself)- Ne-Yo

Verity struggles with insecurity. She was in two relationships before she began dating Vito, and neither of them ended on a great note. Vito feels very strongly towards her, and not only does he want to show her that he loves and cares about her, but he also wants her to love herself. He wants her to see herself as the kind, caring, and beautiful woman he sees her as. He’ll gladly put his own insecurities aside if it means lifting her up. 

[graffitibible]

PLEASE dig more into the intricacies of ghoul and gogo's relationship I'd LOVE to hear more!!

OH THANK GOD, i have SO MANY THOTS about this relationship

im putting this under a cut because it got. ridiculously long lmao. im sorry you can indulge me if you want

one of the hardest things about writing ghouls pov is that he is, consistently, a ridiculously unreliable narrator. their awareness of themself and other people is on so many different levels of disordered thinking and his sense of self is so distorted by a chemical cocktail of neuroses, compartmentalized trauma, and a lifetime of severe self-loathing. they’re like ten layers deep into this mental bullshit and don’t have the tools to unpack it. whenever ghoul meets someone new, theres a fundamental paranoia and fear regarding what their motives might be in regards to him. thats why they approach everything with so much defensiveness and the general assumption that someone has an ulterior motive. this is actually pretty common coming from kids with roughed up backgrounds like ghoul’s. unprompted kindness absolutely terrifies him because they assume theres some kind of trick there - historically, all the people in his life who were supposed to be “safe” weren’t so this is one of the rules of the world that ghoul’s internalized as fact. and because ghoul is scared basically all the time they tend to grab that fear and channel it into being angry instead because that nets him more control of the situation.

basically: ghoul is two thousand tons of radioactive maladaptive coping mechanisms packed into a five foot two goblin who hates the idea of being scared all the time and has chosen instead to channel all that fear into being An Absolute Nightmare.

narratively, i needed ghoul to have at least one positive relationship in his life so that there was a basis for some good relationships in the fabulous four collective. i needed ghoul to have some kind of context of “this is what it’s like to trust someone, this is what it’s like to love someone so goddamn much you’d do unspeakable things to keep them safe, this is what it’s like to have someone in your life who has your back unconditionally.” granted, thats not how this relationship ended, but at least for a minute there, gogo and ghoul had each other’s backs. that was important because i needed ghoul to have some experience in navigating a positive relationship. 

it wasn’t originally gonna be newsagogo, but i did know that gogo was gonna cross paths with ghoul prior to their run-in with poison and kobra - this was something i settled on sometime while i was writing part two of “starry-eyed.” gogo was meant to be a) one of the ways to contextualize a lot of the Shit in the zones that ghoul didn’t have an opportunity to learn about on their own time and b) one of the key ways that ghoul gets to cement a real genuine sense of justice. prior to that, ghoul had this unfocused hatred of bli the way most people in the zones do but didn’t have a real big picture understanding of how best to chip away at that kinda construct. the closest thing to it was gangs that were super bloodthirsty and liked to hunt dracs for sport but these groups weren’t interested in dismantling the institution of bli, just the catharsis of blasting dracs to hell and back. so when i got to this run-in proper, there were enough similarities in their characters (both tech-heads, both with some deep-seated vendettas against bli, both prone to couching their Real Problems in humor and deflection, etc.) for me to go “hang on.....what if....” and i could kill 2 birds with one narrative stone.

that being said oh man i did not expect writing that relationship to hurt the way it did. 

because on a lot of levels, these two really got each other! ghoul can read gogo’s expressions and body language so easy. ghoul, like jet, is an extrovert; he recharges best around people they trust. gogo’s the same. like, one thing i feel like i didn’t do well enough in that chapter was cement that, objectively speaking, gogo didn’t strictly need ghoul’s help. newsagogo is fully capable of setting up and running that station all on their own. ghoul suspected this from the start, sure, but gogo has a good grasp of tech and could probably do most of the setup herself. BUT she offers this hand to him because she doesn’t like running this station alone. she likes people and likes being around people - hence why she’s so desperate to get herself really networked into the desert and capable of calling up other dj buddies of hers. it’s pretty common practice for a dj to have a partner or team to back them up (in case they need a runner, in case they need to pack their stuff and go, in case they need someone to spot them, etc.) so gogo was in the market for that - and ghoul was a good candidate. a tech-brain, someone good with radios and obscure gear? that’s ideal runner material, and gogo doesn’t have to do this shit on her own.

and newsagogo was a really good influence on ghoul in a lot of ways. she’s the first person to go “hey let’s just do shit for fun” without any ulterior motive. takes them out drinking for fun, likes to drink soda on the roof for fun (this did not always end well but the intention was in the right place). that’s a new thing for ghoul, who’s always felt fundamentally unwanted. in every group and crew and relationship he’s had prior to this one, there was always the undercurrent of “they’re using me. they’re using me and once they’re done using me they’re gonna ditch me or kill me.” so while gogo’s doing these casual bonding activities ghoul is like WHAT IS THE ULTERIOR MOTIVE HERE and their paranoia is eating away at him and theres really honestly no other shoe that needs to drop here but thats not something that registers on ghoul’s radar.

even with that rocky start ghoul was picking up a lotta stuff from gogo, like that aforementioned sense of justice. and it was with a positive relationship like that one that i could bring out just how person-oriented fun ghoul is. like, the way i write the fab four, someone like party poison is task-oriented. fun ghoul (and jet star, actually) are both person-oriented. that’s why fun ghoul becomes so ride-or-die for newsagogo. this is actually like...their default state of being if allowed to get close to people lol. fun ghoul has a distorted sense of self that causes him to rank their own safety and self-worth way below everyone else’s along with a default propensity to love people...deeply. ghoul loves people ungently. they love people with everything they are. will easily put himself in a position to die if it means that the people they love are safe. part of this is setting up just how easy it was for the fab four and ghoul in particular to make that suicidal, sacrificial call in “SING” but part of this is just who fun ghoul is as a person. so when gogo gets hurt, ghoul goes ahead and conjures up every scrap of leverage he has against tommy chow mein and basically sets it on fire because that’s what ghoul loving someone is like. it’s ghoul trying to take apart anything that threatens the people they give a shit about and being wholly capable and willing to set himself on fire to keep the people they love warm.

they complimented each other incredibly well in a way that surprised me. like, ghoul gets people in a way gogo doesn’t, and vice versa. gogo has the attack plan and knows how they intend to set about dismantling bli with careful, calculated movements, but ghouls the one that suggests “hey, you know that if youre a dj you actually have a lot of political capital in the zones, technically??” like not with those words but thats the basic gist behind what they suggested. prior to that it didn’t occur to gogo to use DJing as a route to get what they needed but DJs have a lot of clout in the zones with the right crowds and ghoul’s hunch turned out to be correct. gogo’s the person who can do the face-to-face interactions in a clear and concise way, who can sell good headlines on the airwaves, but ghouls the one who comes at those interactions with the requisite suspicion to realize when things could be off - it’s that paranoid initiative that saves gogo’s life when that bomb goes off.

ofc once ghoul realized that they gave this much of a shit about newsagogo he immediately tried to stop thinking about it because this kind of unconditional caring for someone? that’s brand new. and it terrifies the shit out of him. because all of a sudden, ghoul doesn’t have the handy back door that they’ve always had. if shit really gets bad, he tells himself consistently, they can just leave. they can ditch whoever they’re with and it’ll be fine. but when ghoul gives this much of a shit about someone, the idea of leaving feels like trying to carve your heart out with a spoon. every time gogo expressed this casual affection ghoul does his best to brush it aside or willfully forget it - but they dont, really. subconsciously that’s always there. and no matter what kind of bad blood manages to end up between them, ghoul can’t forget that this is the first person who he actually wanted to call a friend; they keep that pendant gogo gave him for the rest of their life.

but ultimately, the pair of them fell apart because they both grew in such a way that they couldnt be in each other’s lives forever. gogo prioritizes the cause over her interpersonal relationships; that’s just the kind of person they are in this stage of rebellion against bli. gogo can look at her personal happiness and acknowledge that something like that is secondary to their goals. war is about sacrifice and gogo understands this. newsagogo knows that she might not survive to the end of it, knows full well that their agents might not survive to the end of it, and has accepted these consequences. losing some of their agents doesn’t shake gogo the same way it does ghoul.

because ghoul’s the kind of person who can’t accept that. this is the first positive relationship he’s had in their life and he doesn’t wanna lose it. he doesn’t wanna lose newsagogo over a big blanket cause. the seeds for that kind of “will die bleeding for this cause” are there, but ghoul is a socially-oriented person and very person-oriented in general. and fundamentally, fun ghoul is a deeply compassionate person who can’t help but empathize: the micro will always supersede the macro. it’s easier for ghoul to charge into battery city to save a little girl than it would to charge into battery city for a vaguely defined reason that might further a broader cause.

unfortunately, because gogo and ghoul had two such different approaches to this and because ghoul is a volatile person, they did that thing where uh. again, this is pretty common in abuse survivors, but ghoul did that thing where he detonates their positive relationships because this was always a foregone conclusion to someone ensconced in so many paranoid maladaptive coping mechanisms and at least this way, with ghoul going off, the relationship gets to detonate in a way that ghoul can control. a lot of those moments where ghoul acts like an absolute little nightmare have to do with that notion of control; this way, fun ghoul gets to decide when and how the relationship ends and for someone who did not get a lot of control over anything in their early life, this is how he compensates.

i wrote this fuckin. tragic “friends who drifted apart, who didn’t see the cracks in the foundation of their relationship until they were using them to splinter themselves away from each other” with no basis in anything canon and fucked myself up over it and why did i do this?

this was an essay and a half but yeah feel free to yell at me about newsagogo and fun ghoul cause THATS a niche fucking friendship i didnt expect to mess me up the way it did

[boreum-dal]

la confiture, pt. iii

fandom: miraculous ladybug (adrinette, nino/alya) 

summary: marinette dupain-cheng is one step closer to her dream of becoming a top chef when she's hired to cook at the famed restaurant, la confiture. but to get to the top, she's got to surpass adrien agreste, her rival and the son of la confiture's owner.

too bad he's so sweet that he's nearly impossible to dislike.

and too bad she loves when he invites her over after work to test out new dishes at his apartment.

and too bad his relationship with his father makes her want to hold him and never let him go.

and--just like that, her dreams don't seem so simple anymore.

“Marinette…”

Marinette turned around, too surprised to do anything besides look at Adrien’s hand, just barely touching her arm, and then up at his eyes, dazed and full of… What was that? Confusion? Appreciation? Something she didn’t know how to name. She wondered vaguely to herself how they could look so green and vibrant in the dim lamplight of his foyer. It wasn’t fair.

“Why... Why are you doing this for me?” Adrien asked, his voice quiet.

Marinette felt her heart drop, a soft breath escaping her. Oh, Adrien. “Because you’re my friend, of course. And I didn’t want you to be sick and alone with no one to help you.”

cross-posted: ao3

prev: i | ii

la confiture

part iii.

Comment from Chat Noir on “Chocolate-Glazed Marble Cake” 

1:31 AM

22/1

Hi, Ladybug! I hope you take comfort in the fact that the cake looked delicious, even if not the most aesthetically pleasing. It’s unfortunate that one of your cakes broke, but the other looked beautiful when it came out of the oven! I also totally sympathize with your frustration with tempering the chocolate for the glaze. Truth be told, for things like glaze, I find it’s much easier to do away with couverture and just go with a big slab of chocolate compound. You won’t have to deal with the mattifying effect you described, and the glaze will look professional grade. Thanks as always for your wonderful posts. They really do make my week!

  Reply Comment from Ladybug to Chat Noir on “Chocolate-Glazed Marble Cake”

2:40 AM

22/1

Chat Noir, thank you for the solid advice. I did a little reading on compounds after your post and am sad that I put myself through the pains of tempering couverture chocolate now, ha. Thanks also for your kind words. I always love getting to know my followers, but I’d like to say I’m so happy you’ve become a regular commenter these last few weeks. These days, I find myself wondering what you will have to say in particular about my dishes with each post! Please take care. 

---

“How is it that you stop by the restaurant and talk to Nino one time and land a date within five minutes of meeting him?”

Alya laughed. “I’m a charmer, what can I say?”

Marinette shook her head as she whisked a bit of cream into the sauce she was simmering. “You really are. Well, he’s a wonderful guy, and I actually think you would get along really well. I’m not sure why I didn’t think to introduce you two before. Here, come try this.”

Alya hopped off of her seat on one of the barstools by Marinette’s kitchen counter, wine glass in hand, and let Marinette tip a spoonful of sauce into her mouth. “Oh, that is so good.”

“Yeah?” Marinette grinned. “That’s great—I’ve been trying for days now to lessen the amount of cream I use in this sauce to make it less heavy, but it’s been really hard to replicate the taste.”

“Guess you found a winner! I can’t wait to eat. So tell me more about Nino.” Alya leaned back against the counter beside Marinette and took a sip of her wine.

Marinette glanced up as she continued to stir, thinking. “Mm... Well, he’s very easygoing, a good conversationalist, and a good listener. He doesn’t get riled up easily, but he’ll also stand his ground. It kind of makes him the perfect bartender, because he can talk with anyone and nothing will ruffle his feathers, not even the worst customer or Gabriel Agreste on his worst day. Plus, he’s so nice.”

“And cute,” Alya added.

Marinette giggled. “And cute. I think he’s also interested in music? He mentioned DJing at a few places before he started working as our bartender.”

“So that’s how he got tickets to that show!”

“What show?”

“The one he’s taking me to for our date. It’s a really popular DJ on his European tour. Those tickets were sold out weeks ago.”

“Somehow, it doesn’t shock me that you’re going to a club for your first date,” Marinette said, laughing.

“Hey, now. I’m not a cheap date. He’s taking me to dinner first!” Alya grinned. “Also, he mentioned to me he’s close with your little chef prince.”

Marinette frowned as she turned the stove down and removed her pan from the heat. “My who?”

“Adrien Agreste. So if you’re so close with Nino, why can’t you use him to get closer to Adrien?” Alya reached up into Marinette’s cupboards and began to pull down plates.

Marinette snorted. “How would I even do that?”

“I don’t know, like figure out if they ever hang out outside of work and then tag along with Nino!”

“Okay, now that would be shameless,” Marinette said, giggling. She carefully began plating the steak and mushroom marsala. “Just too weird. Nino and I aren’t nearly close enough for that. Plus, I don’t need to get any closer to Adrien.”

Alya frowned. “Why not?”

“It makes me… I don’t know, confused?” Marinette said, keeping her eyes on the plates. “It’s simpler not to know him well. Like you said, it’s much harder to compete with someone I like.”

“There is such a thing as friendly rivalry, you know.” 

“I know.” Marinette sighed. “I just preferred when I had tunnel vision and this singular goal with no distractions.”

Alya patted her friend on the back. “Look, Marinette. You’re a fantastic chef. You’re also a fantastic human being. It’s natural that people around you will want to get to know you. I think you can afford to make a few friends while you work your way up the ladder, don’t you think?”

Marinette chewed her lower lip before smiling. “Yeah, I suppose so.”

Alya grinned. “And a little romance wouldn’t hurt, either!”

Marinette laughed and whacked Alya playfully with the dish towel she’d been holding. “As if. Let’s eat!”

---

Marinette stared at the metal numbers glued to Adrien’s front door and wondered to herself how she’d ended up here for the second time in a month. She bounced a bit on her toes, wondering why she was nervous to knock. 

Despite what she’d told Alya at dinner a few days ago, she’d caught herself wondering—only when her guard was down—whether Adrien would actually invite her over again. They’d brushed elbows and exchanged glances and jokes at work a few times, and they’d left and locked up together even more, but beyond that, he hadn’t expressed any interest in seeing her outside of the restaurant again. Much to Marinette’s own surprise, she’d found herself disappointed instead of pleased—until he’d asked her out of the blue a few days ago if he’d like to come by on Monday to learn how to make that coffee cake. 

Alya’s triumphant cackle when Marinette had told her echoed in her ears. 

Whatever, she thought to herself. This is normal. Perfectly fine! I’m excited for no other reason than the fact that we’re friendly coworkers, and he offered to show me some new tricks. Like baking a coffee cake.

She sighed before knocking on the door. 

“It’s open!”

The door creaked loudly as Marinette opened it and stepped inside, taking a moment to shiver in pleasure at the burst of warm air. It was frigid outside, and the drafty interior hallways of Adrien’s apartment building were not much better. She glanced around at the kitchen and living area as she shrugged off her coat, but Adrien was nowhere to be seen.

Plagg appeared beside her, butting his head against her ankles. Marinette smiled and reached down to pet him. “Hello, chaton. It’s nice to see you, too.”

“Marinette?” 

Marinette looked up, and there was Adrien, dressed in a grey long-sleeved knit and black fitted joggers. She’d never seen him so dressed down before—even when he’d had her over previously, he’d been in jeans and a button-down. It made her feel like he was a little more human, even if a voice in the back of her head reminded her unhelpfully that he still looked quite handsome.

“Hi,” she said, standing up as he came over to take her coat from her. “Thank you for having me over.”

“Anytime.” Adrien smiled, and this close up, Marinette realized he had a dimple in his left cheek. She promptly urged herself to ignore this.

“Sorry I didn’t come to the door—I was digging around in the pantry for the hazelnuts. I thought for a second I was out and nearly panicked. Ready to learn the ways of the Agreste family coffee cake?”

Marinette caught an apron he tossed to her as she followed him into the kitchen area, where Adrien had already set up two stations with all the ingredients they’d need. 

She tried to quell her nerves; Adrien had proven himself time and again to be kind and astonishingly nonjudgmental. He wouldn’t make her feel bad once he saw how badly she would botch this cake. Or tell his father and then have a good laugh about it. Right?

“I was born ready.”

“That’s what I like to hear!” Adrien cheered. Plagg looked up at Adrien disdainfully. “Let’s get started, shall we?”

---  

“Look at that,” Adrien said softly, peering into the oven window beside Marinette. “You’re a natural.”

Marinette smiled, feeling herself flush. She glanced back into the window of the oven, where her surprisingly not-malformed coffee cake was baking. “We can’t say that just yet, can we? We’ll jinx it. Plus, look at my work station. And myself,” she said, standing up and laughing as she held out her forearms, which were covered entirely in flour.

Adrien chuckled, wiping up a little bit of flour from Marinette’s work station with his finger. “There were... a few mishaps, sure. But what’s important is you soldiered on and didn’t let the mistakes affect your final product!”

“You’re very kind, Adrien.” Marinette grabbed a paper towel and wet it under the sink, intending to wipe the remnants of flour and batter from the counter while they waited for the cake to bake. She paused when she felt a hand on her arm and turned to Adrien, eyes wide.

“We’ll leave that for later,” Adrien said, a grin on his face. “For now, how about a latte? Can’t have coffee cake without coffee.”

Marinette felt her stomach do that same uncomfortable flip it had done when she’d first walked up to his door that afternoon. She swallowed and nodded, trying to ignore it. “U-uh—sure.” She smiled. “A latte sounds nice.”

The two ended up on Adrien’s sofa, artfully poured lattes in hand. Marinette had removed her shoes and her knees were drawn up to her chest, chin resting on them as she relayed to Adrien her experiences growing up in the public school system. 

“So you’re still friends with Alya to this day?” Adrien asked, eyes wide. “How old are you?”

“Yes, she’s still my best friend,” Marinette said proudly. “I’m twenty-eight.”

Adrien whistled. “That’s incredible. Twenty years of friendship. I don’t think I’ve known anyone for twenty years except my father.”

He sounded wistful, and Marinette took a moment to observe him more carefully. Adrien sat with his elbows leaning on his knees, hands folded around his cup, bright green eyes staring out at the cityscape beyond his window. His mouth was set in what looked, at first glance, like a neutral line, but when Marinette looked a little closer, she realized that one corner was tilted up—but then, she thought, why did he look sad?

Marinette knew how demanding the life of a chef was. The days they worked were long and tiring, beginning before lunch and often ending in the late hours of the night when the city was already shutting down. The few days they had off consisted of catching up on sleep where they could and then still spending time training to perfect their craft. So in a sense, every chef was probably a little bit deprived of personal relationships compared to the average person.

But Adrien had revealed to Marinette as they’d taken their first few sips of coffee that he had been home-schooled his whole life until he’d attended culinary school. He had been given no chance by his father to even consider working anywhere besides La Confiture upon graduation. And upon learning these things, she’d come to a realization that produced the strangest ache in her chest: Adrien must have been profoundly lonely throughout his childhood. Even in adulthood, it was evident in the way he so readily opened his arms and his home to his colleagues.

“Marinette?”

Marinette startled, nearly spilling her coffee. “Hm?”

Adrien’s lips curled up into a soft smile, and now Marinette’s stomach was doing those stupid flips and that ache in her chest was getting stronger. When he spoke, he sounded amused. “You seemed like you were checked out there for a little bit. Or maybe there’s flour on my face?” 

“Oh!” Marinette could feel her face getting hotter by the moment, and she scrambled for something to say. “I—um—I was just thinking—speaking of Alya, did you know that she and Nino are going on a date this weekend?”

Adrien, much to Marinette’s relief, seemed totally distracted by this information. “Is she really? That’s awesome!”

“Yeah! So—maybe one day, if it works out between them, I mean—we can all grab lunch—I mean—that is, I’d love for you to meet her…” Marinette trailed off and tried not to imagine how red her face was by now. Why couldn’t she stop rambling?

Adrien didn’t seem to notice, and instead gave her that same slow smile, electric green eyes trained on hers. “I’d really like that. Thanks, Marinette.”

In lieu of responding—or throwing herself out of his window, which was her preferred reaction—Marinette opted to gulp down the remainder of her latte.

---

“So, how was your date?”

Marinette rolled her eyes. “It wasn’t a date, Alya.” 

“You went to his house and baked and had coffee and then he made you dinner! Sounds like a date to me.”

“The dinner was impromptu,” Marinette mumbled into the phone as she settled into bed.

“Dates can be impromptu.”

“Alya,” Marinette groaned. “Can we not? I’m confused enough as it is.”

”Okay, okay. Can you at least tell me how it went?”

“It went fine, of course,” Marinette sighed. “I mean, he was perfectly sweet, he’s a great teacher, and when we talked…”

“When you talked?”

“It was… I just learned so much about him that made me feel… I don’t know, like he needed a friend. Like I should be his friend.”

“Hmm. That’s not the tune you were singing a few days ago.”

“I know,” Marinette said, and then, only because this was Alya she was talking to and no one else, she let herself admit, “But maybe now I’m in too deep.”

Alya was quiet for a moment, and Marinette knew that her friend was thinking of how to respond. Thankfully, she didn’t press the issue.

“So did the cake turn out okay?” Alya asked, pivoting to another subject. “You can use the recipe for your blog!”

”No way. On the off chance he reads my blog, he’d figure out who I was in an instant if I did that.”

“So?”

“So then he’d know that I’m a sham of a chef!”

“Marinette,” Alya said, exasperated. “You are not a sham. You’re working at one of the top restaurants in Paris. The Gabriel Agreste personally called you in to tell you you’re doing a good job. Just because you never attended cooking school or got formal training doesn’t mean you’re not a real chef. If anything, it makes you even more amazing for having gotten where you are today.”

Marinette smiled softly. “Thanks, Alya.”

“You know it. Any time you feel that impostor syndrome coming on and need someone to kick its ass, I’m your girl.”

---

Marinette glanced at her watch as she made her way out of the kitchen. She frowned. It was already past three, and Adrien was nowhere to be seen. By now, he’d normally have already finished whatever prep work he had to do and would have moved on to help the others, cracking terrible jokes that everyone secretly loved. It felt awfully quiet without him around. 

Nino called Marinette over from the bar, startling her out of her thoughts.

“What’s up?” Marinette said, taking a seat at one of the stools. 

“Looking for Adrien?”

Marinette’s brows shot up to her forehead. “Wh-no, I—” 

“It’s okay,” Nino said, laughing. “You don’t have to be embarrassed. I’ve just seen you looking around all afternoon, but I get it because I’ve been worried, too.”

Marinette pursed her lips. “Well, do you know where he is?”

Nino nodded. “He finally texted me back about ten minutes ago. Said he’s at home sick.”

“Sick?” Marinette repeated. Her frown became even more pronounced. “He must be feeling horrible if he couldn’t even come in."

“Yeah, I think so, too. He’s such a workaholic.”

Marinette glanced around to make sure they were relatively alone, and then she leaned in. “How does Chef Agreste feel about it?” she whispered.

Nino shook his head. “He’s in a bad mood. No telling if that’s why, but he’s probably not very happy that Adrien couldn’t make it to work.”

“Of course,” Marinette sighed. Chef Agreste did not strike her as the type of person who easily overlooked even his own son calling in sick on a shift. “Do you know if anyone’s been by to see him?”

“I don’t think so,” Nino said. “I offered to take him some leftovers from the restaurant after we closed up, but he said he’d be okay. I worry about him, though, living by himself and being that ill.”

Marinette turned this information over in her head. Adrien was a grown man, and he could obviously take care of himself—but the picture she had painted of him over the time she’d gotten to know him made her think he was probably lonely and wracked with guilt, on top of being sick. 

Marinette smiled at Nino. “You know, I make a pretty mean chicken soup... I’ll bring it by to him after work. I’ll send him your regards.”

---

Adrien opened his eyes to darkness, completely disoriented and not quite able to understand what had woken him in the first place. His head was pounding. 

His phone buzzed twice more on his nightstand before going silent, and he realized someone had been trying to call him. Blindly, he reached over to grab his phone and looked at the screen. 

Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Missed Call

It registered somewhere in the back of his fever-addled brain that since they had exchanged numbers, Marinette had only texted and never called him before. Before he knew what he was doing, the phone was at his ear, and he heard two rings before Marinette’s voice came through the speaker.

“Hello? Adrien?”

“Hey, Marinette,” he rasped. He cleared his throat—he didn’t realize until just then that he’d gone the entire day without speaking. “What’s up? I missed your call.”

“How’re you feeling?” 

Adrien sat up, leaning back on one hand. Plagg stirred in his spot on top of the duvet between Adrien’s calves. His covers fell off of his torso, and he immediately regretted the action. Sweat had soaked through his t-shirt as he’d slept, and the air outside of his blankets felt frigid against his dampened skin. 

“Oh, you know. Just…”

“Terrible, I’m guessing, if you called in sick,” Marinette said, her voice sympathetic. “Did I wake you?”

“No,” he lied. He leaned back against his pillow. The inside of his head was so hot, but his body was so cold. He had no idea how to fix this. “What’s going on? Everything okay?”

“Of course! Actually, the reason I’m calling is—well, I know you’re not well, but I was wondering if I could stop by? I made you soup.” 

The surprise cleared Adrien’s head better than any medication had all day. “Soup?” 

“Yeah, but I also completely understand if you don’t want visitors,” Marinette responded quickly. “Plus, it’s late—I’m sorry, this was stupid of me, and—”

“No, no,” Adrien said, sitting up again. “Please—please come by. If it’s not too much trouble.” 

There was a pause. “You sure?” 

“Yes. Soup sounds wonderful. Are you coming from the restaurant? I’ll see you in fifteen minutes?"

“Um... Not to be creepy, but I’m already here. I was just going to drop it off, so—”

“Oh,” Adrien said, too dumbfounded to respond in a more intelligent way. He shook his head. He felt a rush of appreciation for Marinette’s thoughtfulness. After he’d reluctantly called in sick, his own father hadn’t called once to check on him—not that he’d expected him to. “I mean—no, it’s not creepy at all. Hang on, I’ll buzz you in.” 

---

Marinette could have kicked herself. She didn’t know what she’d been thinking, coming over uninvited. And of course Adrien would be way too nice to turn her down, as intrusive as she was being. The door opened before she had time to convince herself to turn around.

“Hey,” Adrien croaked, and then he chuckled, scratching the back of his head. “Sorry. I probably sound horrible.”

All of Marinette’s embarrassment drained away into concern. Adrien leaned against the doorway, pale and gaunt in wrinkled, baggy pajama pants and a t-shirt, blond hair mussed and matted against his head this way and that. He looked like he might fall over any moment.

“Adrien! Just how sick are you?” Marinette said, rushing inside. She set the large container of soup down on the nearest surface and reached up to feel his forehead, and then felt blood rush to her cheeks when she recognized how intimate the action felt. 

Adrien, for his part, didn’t seem to mind; he closed his eyes, and Marinette felt the slightest pressure as he leaned his forehead into her hand. Something warm surged inside of her at the trusting nature of the action.

“You’re burning up,” she said, feeling her brows knit together. “Have you eaten anything today? Taken any medication?”

“I’m fine,” Adrien mumbled. 

“I’ll take that as a no. Well, lucky for you, I brought chicken soup! And there should be enough for you to last you through tomorrow, too.” She picked the carton back up and held it up to him proudly. “Mind if I use your kitchen to heat this up?”

“Oh—of course not,” Adrien said, slightly dumbfounded. “Um... Do you need help?”

Marinette laughed. “You are impossible. No, I don’t need help! I just wanted to pour it into a pot and heat it over your stove for a bit. You should go lie down.” She turned to head toward the kitchen, pausing only when she felt warm fingers brushing against her elbow.

“Marinette…”

Marinette turned around, too surprised to do anything besides look at Adrien’s hand, just barely touching her arm, and then up at his eyes, dazed and full of… What was that? Confusion? Appreciation? Something she didn’t know how to name. She wondered vaguely to herself how they could look so green and vibrant in the dim lamplight of his foyer. It wasn’t fair. 

“Why... Why are you doing this for me?” Adrien asked, his voice quiet. 

Marinette felt her heart drop, a soft breath escaping her. Oh, Adrien. “Because you’re my friend, of course. And I didn’t want you to be sick and alone with no one to help you.” 

Adrien’s eyes widened ever so slightly—or maybe that was just Marinette’s imagination. His lips parted, like he might say something, but instead, he let out a quiet exhale. Marinette was aware, perhaps too acutely, of the warmth of his fingertips, still on her elbow. Later, she would guess that they stood like that, staring at each other in complete silence, for maybe three seconds after she’d answered his question. But in the time it happened, it felt like forever.

“I’m—I’m gonna go heat this up, okay?” she finally said. “I’ll bring it over when it’s ready.”

“Ah, right. Okay.” Adrien paused. “You’re eating, too, right? You must be starving after work, after all.”

Marinette glanced at the clock, surprised. She hadn’t even realized how late it was. She looked back at Adrien, who was watching her again, this time with clear anticipation, evident just at the end of the curve of his lips, in the slope of his raised eyebrows. She was reminded, again, of how much he seemed to crave human company, and how much he must have been deprived of it in his lifetime.

“Sure,” she said, nodding. “I’ll make myself some, too. Find something good on TV, won’t you?”

---

Adrien was a no-show the next day, as was expected. Marinette was mostly relieved—she wouldn’t have been shocked if he’d tried to drag himself out of bed, even in his condition, if his father gave him hard enough of a time—but she also found herself enjoying work a little bit less. As Rose had noted the day before, Adrien’s absence was oddly loud.

Thankfully, La Confiture was so busy that night that Marinette didn’t have too much time to think about it. With Adrien gone, everyone’s workload had increased somewhat, and as one of the more junior chefs in the kitchen, Marinette was saddled with quite a bit of extra work. But in the few spare moments she did have, she thought more than once about pulling out her phone and sending him a message.

Just checking on you. Hope you’re ok. Eat all of your soup!

Marinette stared at the screen of her phone, which glared back at her in the darkness of the locker room, where she’d come for a brief reprieve from all the action. She chewed on her lower lip as her thumb hovered over the “send” key. Why was she hesitating? Her stomach felt funny—maybe she’d caught the bug from Adrien. It was a perfectly normal message to send. But she felt like she’d imposed so much the night before by just assuming she could come by, and—

“Marinette!” Juleka’s voice rang. “We’ve got a situation in the kitchen!”

Marinette sighed as she pressed her thumb against the backspace key and shoved the phone back in the pocket of her coat. 

---

At 1:05 AM, when the kitchen was finally clean and the restaurant was totally silent, Marinette let herself into the locker room and began to pull on her coat. She picked her phone out of the pocket and hit the home key absentmindedly before nearly dropping it in surprise. Below a missed call from her mom and half a dozen texts from Alya, there was a particular name she hadn’t expected to show up in her notifications.

Adrien Agreste

3 New Messages

12:47 AM

Marinette slid her thumb across the screen, not sure what to expect, and opened the messages.

Hey, thank you again for the soup! It was just as good on day two. I feel better already. Hope things weren’t too insane at the restaurant tonight.

And then, beneath a picture of Plagg, standing on the coffee table and sticking his nose into a near-empty bowl:

Plagg likes the soup, too, btw.

Marinette felt her lips curve up into a smile. Without too much thought, nerves forgotten, her thumbs automatically typed out a response. 

Tell him I’ll bring some more by tomorrow, if he’d like.

An answer came back immediately, and as she read it, Marinette registered with some shock what that odd, dully painful bubbling at the pit of her stomach was. 

He would love that. 

[kuuderepunkin]

Match up

A match up for @obsessedwithgems​ <3 <3 <3 

Due to technical difficulties I will not be including her description of herself (but if you want I can add it, love) 

Hazbin Hotel matchup: Sir Pentious 

Man it was a hard draw to decide who to pair you with in Hazbin Hotel but I think the thing that pushed me towards Sir Pentious is your love for snakes, not just cause he’s a lovable snake boy, but it helped me choose between him and Angel Dust. But I think he’d be a better fit just because his little Egg minions would also be a part of your relationship, either to run errands for you or to keep you entertained and happy. Angel Dust is super shippable with people so I was trying to balance where your needs would fall in a relationship (his sexuality slightly worked against him, too) and I do think that having the little crowd of Egg boys would bring a little more joy to your world, while Angel dust himself may drain your overly giving personality. But as I always say! I’m an advocate for loving who you love! So if you like another character? Go for it, my matchups are just based on my opinion of how you and a fictional character meld well- but any couple can work to be a loving relationship <3 . Also a lot of the characters from Hazbin can be jerks but he’s less of a jerk and more of a show off I think, he’d never do you wrong. 

He’s confident enough to break through your shy exterior, he’s loud and bold and will just pull you into a conversation so you don’t have to worry about starting it. 

100% with you on being outgoing and being a bit reckless, he gets so excited he loses his common sense. But he’s more likely to get hurt than you would be. 

He loves being adventurous with you, but he’s a chaotic entity so I can only imagine the laughs you get out of your adventures but it’s therapeutic. 

If you start crying for any reason he stops his ridiculous antics to slither to your side and comfort you. No moment wasted. 

Pentious wraps his tail around you and gently holds you gently caressing your back and running his hand through your hair and gently speaking trying to calm you down. 

If you don’t want him to see you crying he’ll slither away and come back with one of the egg minions and some water. He doesn’t want you to be alone but knows it might be embarrassing to you for him to see you so upset. But it’s important to stay hydrated especially when you’ve cried. He will do everything he can to make it as painless as possible, it’s okay to cry and having feelings is natural and nothing you should feel ashamed about. 

There are so many egg boys that you will not forget to care about yourself, and Sir Pentious will not allow you to not care and maintain your own well being! Your helpful nature is appreciated but you have to care for yourself, and he makes that a rule for you because it’s Hell and he doesn’t want just anybody taking advantage of you. 

The egg boys will treat you like their mother, which is endearing and frustrating? But you do well with children so it shouldn’t be too much different. It’s sweet though, they bring you gifts and draw stuff for you. And they give you lots of love. 

If you’re ever crying they run up to you and ask what’s wrong and they hug you, it’s very cute, you’re never alone with these bubbly dorks. And for your touch related trauma- the good thing is you can tell it’s one of the eggs hugging you, they’re small and oval- it’s easy to tell that it’s them. But they’re not familiar enough for you sir Pentious will scold them and tell them to stay away! No sneaking up on their momma queen! 

When sleeping at night it can either be you and Pentious alone cuddling, his large tail making a little dam around you, keeping your warmth in and making you feel secure.

But all the same, if you’re alright with a couple of the eggs joining you they’re like teddy bears, they scatter around the bed and almost sleep like pets by your legs or hugging Pentious’ tail. 

Pentious’ long arms will be wrapped around your body, keeping you close to his chest with his head on yours. 

And while you may be tougher than you look, you are regarded as his queen! He cannot allow his lover to be in the front line of battle, and not fighting with the riff raf in Hell. He knows all too well you can take care of yourself- you probably beat him up once because he thought you were so cute saying you could handle yourself- but even so he doesn’t like the idea of letting you out alone. It’s not in an obsessive way- it’s just hell is dangerous and he’s a kind of big part in the territory wars so you may have a big target on your back. 

So he’ll send one of his minions with you if you leave without him, but that’s so he knows where to find you, the eggs aren’t great at combat in the first place and he respects your skills. It’s just a safety net. 

Pentious will ask you to sing to him, looking like a begging puppy because he really wants to hear your beautiful voice. Even if you don’t think it’s amazing he will disagree with you on that aspect. “A butterfly can’t see their own vibrant colors! You’re the butterfly in this analogy…. and your singing is your wings-“ he’s only explaining because he realized the analogy might be about beauty and not talent and he confused himself. But he’s so proud that I will not admit that he’s wrong! 

He will let you hold the end of his tail and play with it idly as the two of you talk, or he’s busy doing a villainous monologue. Or if you would prefer you can carry an egg around like it would be a teddy bear. 

One last thing- he loves to put his top hat on you and watch it slide down your forehead because it’s too big. It makes him giggle. 

Steven Universe match up: Sour Cream 

Alright another hard debate but this time because there’s so many good options. Sour cream could really align with some of your interests and he’s a great significant other but I feel like he may have a different emotional expression? From the way he reacted to Steven’s problems kind of makes me think he will struggle with deep emotional struggles you may have- but also that doesn’t mean he can’t be a good lover. And then Pink Pearl would line up with your interests as well, she loves to learn new things, just like her diamond she loved nature and the likes. And she could make you happy- the two of you could work together to take care of each other and help each other heal and grow. She will help you learn the value of taking care of yourself even when helping others. She would love to have fun with you, too. Signing, dancing, doing art, teaching and learning piano with you, it all seems like so much fun to her! And to get to spend time with you! Those all make her so happy. But I ran myself into a circle again! Idk who would fit with you better in a match up. That last push towards Sour Cream was your love of horror and your aesthetic, I feel like he would better understand them. Pearl would love to dress up with you and mimic your style but I don’t know if she would understand how it would fit into self expression, and I feel like horror might scare her a little too much. All the while Sour Cream loves the macabre and mysterious! 

Sour Cream himself is pretty quiet despite how sociable he is, so it’s easy to approach him or have him come to chat with you. He loves talking to people, but he likes the underdogs so if he sees you shying away he would love to approach you. 

When he approaches you he probably complements your glasses and hair, and how it really vibes with your style! Honestly it probably inspires him to make some new music more attuned to the cas emo vibes. 

He is ecstatic when you finally open up and become adventurous because he’s ready to have fun and party with you! 

And the party doesn’t have to be with tons of people, just the two of you going on some wacky adventures or going exploring and just having some fun! 

He would love to go to abandoned places with you, making some fun youtube videos or tiktoks. Going exploring in forests and having fun in nature sounds like a ball to him. He may be a techy guy but he loves doing new and exciting things with you. 

Sour Cream is no stranger to crying, he’s had these feelings of hopelessness when it came to his family and then his career- so I think he understands how best to help you. 

When you need to be alone and let it out he will just slide you some snacks and water and kiss your forehead and whisper he’s there for you when you’re ready to talk. 

If you wouldn’t mind his company he’s there rubbing the back of your hand and back. Water and snacks all in toe, he probably stores them in his massive pockets ngl. 

While you’re easy to fluster, he thinks it’s pretty cute! He will try to make you blush but not to the point of making you dizzy, he just thinks you're so adorable! 

Heck yeah powerful women! He’s so hype for you kicking butt and he has no doubt that you can be cute, hardcore, and kick ass. Sour Cream is your hype man, and biggest fan, he’ll ask you to show him some moves! If you were okay with it! 

Showing him some of your self defense moves can lead to a cuddle pile or a light tickle fight because it’s just the two of you having fun, he thinks your skills are cool and not something he wants to challenge you at- he’s just curious. 

Sour Cream totally gets the insecurity, he has it but has slowly learned how to deal with it. But when he first got into DJing and with the doubt of his step dad, it really weighed on him. So he knows how to help you face those negative feelings. 

Everyone is different on how they handle being insecure but he is always there to be your hype man, and he just lets you know you may not think greatly of yourself but it doesn’t mean you’re not doing spectacular things! 

He loves your singing and asks if you wouldn’t mind him adding some of your vocal tracks into his DJ stuff. 

Sour Cream doesn’t touch without consent, like even holding your hand he asks- though as the relationship grows the way he asks may be more non verbal, like him bumping your hands with his to show he’d like to hold your hand and let you make the first move. But he always makes sure he’s not crossing any boundaries. 

He’s a big cuddle bug, he’s tall and loves to be the big spoon and hug you and curl up. But if you wanted to be the big spoon he’s like “!” He never thought of all those possibilities; it opens new cuddling doors! He’s so excited and 10/10 loves any affection. 

Making you laugh is one of his favorite things to do, he loves to see you happy and full of life, so when you start feeling detached and down he will notice and will move to supportive boyfriend mode. 

He knows you drain yourself by helping others, and helping him at times, so he tries to be the best help for you. 

As your relationship grows he picks up how you help him and will translate it to help you when you need a pick me up. 

Will do his best to give you tips when learning guitar, he knows a few friends who play so he’ll ask them for pointers that he can then give to you. Or if you’re cool meeting his friends and practicing with them he will have a small get together, but there’s no pressure and if you get too anxious he will make an excuse for you so you don’t feel bad about anything. 

He loves horror and honestly he loves a lot of things, this dude is full of admiration and childish awe but it’s all pure. Horror is fun and exciting, it gives him that adrenaline rush. Mystery gets him thinking and discussing different theories with you. Romance makes him mushy and he hugs into you and sometimes he will be extra chessy if you watch a romance flick because it makes him think you want more affection and he really loves to give it. 

Undertale match up: Muffet 

I hope you’re not afraid of spiders, Muffet is such a cute girlfriend and you two would mesh so well in my opinion. I do think monster spiders are a bit different from real spiders, I mean they’re cute in the game so I can just picture them like the Totoro dust sprites. So rather than hairy and spiny legs think soft and cuddly. I can’t say it enough Muffet needs more love, she’s super cute and full of love to give. 

She’s got so many hands to hold, she will let you point at one to hold (I’ve seen this in a comic and I can’t get it out of my head, it’s so cute) and they could be switched out if your arm gets too tired she can wrap her arms around you. 

Loves to comb through and brush your hair, if you’ll let her she’ll try different hairstyles on you. For your goth/emo style she’ll even try to make it fit your aesthetic, maybe doing some macabre braiding with some fun fabric intertwined. 

Heck if you’ll let her she’ll do your makeup, match it with whatever you want, you want it not to be heavy but to give you the intense emo look. Or if you want to look like a goth rock icon she’ll do that! With as many hands as she has it’s easy to get it done, she gently rests her palm on your chin and delicately tilts your head to do your makeup. 

Muffet would adore if you would sing with her, she won’t make you sing for her on your own until you get more comfortable with her because it puts you on the spot. But once you get accustomed to her she would love if you sang to her, she might not be able to help herself and join in. It’s like singing along to your favorite song. 

If you ever express your opinion about your singing being bad she will lightly argue with you, it’s a disagreement and she will explain it as people having a different opinion on music. While you may think your singing is your most hated genre to her is operatic and beautiful! And she will present the fact you’ve gotten awards, so people agree that you have a beautiful voice and are a work of art. She doesn’t push it like it’s a fact, but more so that you may not see your strengths but that others do. 

Loves to hang your art, if you don’t like your stuff hanging around the house you two may share, she will put it in her room or keep it with her while she works. 

You’re never alone when you’re with Muffet, even if she’s not there with you if you seem to be down one of her spiders will give her a heads up and she’ll come to your side to comfort you. 

She loves to cuddle and while you two lay down together she likes to play with your hair and look at your hands, just taking them in her own and comparing them. You’re so interesting to her, Muffet isn’t used to seeing many humans and to be quite frank she doesn’t care too much to meet too many. 

She likes you because of your disposition, your aesthetic, and your interests. Being a human is just another fascinating fact. Your gothic/emo look kind of aligns with her own so she’s excited to discuss fashion with you! Muffet and her spiders will likely create you some fun fashionable gothic clothing based on what you tell her you’re interested in. Or she’ll pick up on the minuscule things that are similar within your favorite outfits. 

Being a spider means she loves the outdoors, broken down, and abandoned locations so going on hikes with you is super refreshing and fun for her. 

She’s so good at comforting you, she’s soft and gentle when speaking, she caresses you gently and knows what to say in tough moments. Gently combing her hands in your hair, and gently scratching your scalp and wiping away your tears. 

She is a wonderful listener and will let you tell her anything, never making you feel ashamed of your emotions- they’re natural after all. And she wants you to know how much she values you and that you haven’t got to feel bad for being who you are. She loves you. 

When you’re blushing she loves to take your face and cup it into her hands and gently squish your cheeks because it’s so cute! 

Don’t you worry about talking to strangers, she can have her spiders handle that for you, any errands you need, they’re very helpful. 

If you want to play with something idly her hand is a good option, it’s romantic and it’s more fun than just playing with your own hand. If you want you can play with two hands, or three!! Honestly as many hands as you would like. 

[freddiebamberfdaliveperformance]

Formation of Live Performance Concept

Having had years of experience as a live musician in a variety of contexts has given me a wide range of perspectives regarding the complexities of live performance. The very idea of being able to quantify what exactly a live performance is meant to achieve is an endless, and potentially untenable task.

Some might say the ideals and themes of live music are easy to define, in terms of what the layman would call truly “live” music - the mind normally jumps to the traditional guitar, bass, drums, singer set-up that Western culture is most accustomed to (Jones and Bennett, 2015). But even the greats of traditional live music vary widely in their execution of live performance.

Bruce Springsteen’s fame is often attributed in part “to his great reputation as a concert performer” (Angelle, 1987), his live performances feature slight reinterpretations of his songs, along with a level of energy unmatched by most of his peers, but Springsteen himself has written before that he believes his concerts are so successful in large part to the narrative framing he gives to his songs live, by often stopping between songs to explain the stories behind what inspired him to write them (Springsteen, 2005).

David Byrne is another musician who has in some ways transcended the potential limitations of the “traditional” live music set-up - his original band, Talking Heads, created the concert film, Stop Making Sense (Demme, 1984), which is now considered to be one of the greatest concert films of all time (Rolling Stone, 2012). His method of performance in Stop Making Sense, and indeed throughout his entire career, was formed largely by incorporating elements of avant-garde and Eastern theatre into the performance, especially including the movement of the musicians, and the staging of the performances (Byrne, 2012). An example of the often subversive nature of Byrne’s live performances can be seen below, from his 2018 performance on the show Late Night with Stephen Colbert.

The ideas and performances of these musicians have impacted my own personal ideas about performance deeply - I’ve always thought it needs to be more than just a musician playing their songs, in most cases there should be elements of theatrics to a live performance, otherwise the audience might as well just be listening to a recording.

During live performances I’ve done in the past I’ve tried to include theatrics in at least some sense throughout all of them. During my time as a drummer in the punk band Ratbags I would often get completely naked on stage while continuing to play the drums, or climb into the audience to sing during the vocal sections of songs where I wasn’t playing drums.

During electronic music performances, especially as DJing is my primary method of electronic performance, it is often harder to include elements of theatrics; due largely to the spaces they take place in - with the performer often being obscured by equipment and lighting, and many audience members focusing more on the act of dancing and socialising rather than staring at the musician/s performing the music - it’s been suggested that the main performance element in DJing is within the choice of songs and the order in which they are played (Hellman, 2009).

During live performances as a DJ I’ve attempted to incorporate elements of theatricalism, but the elements I’ve incorporated have been relatively limited so far. I’ve dabbled a lot with anonymity - wearing a balaclava, and having a friend also wearing one, who will routinely switch places with me in order to create a sense of confusion in the audience about who is the actual DJ. I’ve also leaned heavily on genre-switching - often pulling the tempo down from standard 130bpm house music down to around 75bpm, and suddenly slamming into a dancehall song during an event specified to be a house event - primarily to create a sense of unpredictability for the audience. These efforts are mainly to leave some kind of impression upon the audience - as too often DJ’s can be very good technically, but leave nearly no impression on the audience they perform to.

A huge inspiration to me for crafting my own electronic performance has been the label PC Music. Their label has been at the forefront of “Hyper Pop” since it’s inception in 2013 - Hyper Pop has been described as “experimental music that pushes pop themes and tropes to parody, with some dance/electronic undertones” (Ogunbayo, 2020). This experimentation can also be seen in the live performances of artists on the PC music label, but for this project, and for live performances post-Covid, I’ve been most inspired by their live streams. 

You can see from the video above that “live-stream” may be a bit of a misnomer, as the stream switches between multiple performers, actual theatre pieces, and animated 3D graphics. This stream quite obviously creates that same sense of confusion and unpredictability in the audience that I’ve attempted to create before with live DJ performances.

A.G Cook - the founder, and possibly most famous member of PC Music, recently released the album 7G (Cook, 2020) which masterfully blends elements of electronic music with acoustic elements (Fantano, 2020). This record was instrumental (if you’ll pardon the pun) in the creation of my concept for my live-stream performance. I wanted to incorporate live instruments with electronic music, in the way A.G Cook has done, but also do the electronic music live. 

The video above of A.G Cook obviously incorporates live acoustic elements into electronic music, but after research it’s still unclear whether the electronic section is live or not.

I’d like to incorporate the live electronic elements of something along the lines of Jeff Mills’ live performances (Mills, 2016), with the acoustic/electronic mixing of A.G Cook’s live stream seen above.

I wanted my live performance to, at least attempt to be, something new and different, and from my personal research online I couldn’t find anyone attempting to mix live house music with the banjo - so for my live performance I’ll be live programming drum machines and bass synthesisers, and then playing banjo, run through a variety of guitar pedals, live over the programmed beats.

The closest thing I could find to this idea online is the video linked below. 

Although this performance shares similarities to my idea, it focuses more on using the banjo to create loops, rather than using it as a truly expressive instrument over the beats originally created.

I hope to use my knowledge of live acoustic and electronic performances to create a truly unique live performance, that incorporates elements of theatrics, to entertain and engage the viewer beyond just the medium of music.

References

Angelle, D., 1987. Springsteen Live. Boys' Life, [online] (77), p.12. Available at: <https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=imYEAAAAMBAJ&pg=PA12&dq#v=onepage&q&f=false> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Byrne, D., 2012. How Music Works. San Francisco: McSweeney's.

Cook, A., 2020. 7G. [CD] London: PC Music. Available at: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdr-1H_ezeY&list=PL6fQziqsQI2Nqqp7NncLoC1n5OokpOhgC> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Fantano, A., 2020. A. G. Cook - 7G ALBUM REVIEW. [video] Available at: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pq71XoRcgw> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Hellman, Z., 2009. The DJ Aesthetic: A Look Into The Philosophy And Technology That Enable The Disc Jockey. Boca Raton: Universal Publishers.

Jones, A. and Bennett, R., 2015. The Digital Evolution Of Live Music. Hull: Chandos Publishing.

Mills, J., 2016. Jeff Mills @ Awakenings Festival 2016 - THE 909 WIZARD!. [video] Available at: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xPrVSd7Eys> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Ogunbayo, M., 2020. An Intro To Hyperpop. [online] VALLEY Magazine. Available at: <http://www.valleymagazinepsu.com/an-intro-to-hyperpop/> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Springsteen, B., 2005. Born To Run. New York, NY: Columbia.

Stone, R., 2012. Readers' Poll: The Best Concert Movies Of All Time. [online] Rolling Stone. Available at: <https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-lists/readers-poll-the-best-concert-movies-of-all-time-13805/> [Accessed 21 November 2020].

Stop Making Sense. 1984. [DVD] Directed by J. Demme. Hollywood: Arnold Stiefel Company.

[inboldmagazine]

INBOLD MEETS: Nwaobiala, the artist healing the hidden traumas of the African Diaspora

Nwaobiala poses with paintings created by BAKHITA. Photo taken by BAKHITA. Interview and Text by Nandi Ndoro. 

Nwaobiala (they/them/their) is the mixed-media artist the African Diaspora never knew it needed. Hailing from Nigeria and Prince George's County, Maryland, Nwaobiala is a 21-year-old creative using short films, photography, personal essays, mixed-media collages, and other mediums of art to promote self-care and self-expression.

Since starting university as a pre-med major to appease their traditional parents, Nwaobiala has been shifting into full-time artistry. Addressing everything from their first time having an STI to intergenerational abuse amongst African mothers, Nwaobiala's art is powerful, especially to black people who have never been able to have these conversations. There is no doubt that as they continue to explore their artistic capabilities, they are creating a movement of young black people who seek to explore, expose, and heal the hidden traumas of communities in the African Diaspora.

Nwaobiala’s most recent project, “we are more than bodies,” explores the effects of cultural homophobia in Queer Nigerian Americans via photography and digital collaging.

Nwaobiala sat down with Inbold in July to talk about their upbringing and what it has been like being honest in communities that often promote secrecy.  

How did you get into art?

I've been writing stories ever since I was in 2nd grade. I showed them to my teachers but never to my parents. They used to say, "You have to be a doctor. You have to go to medical school." They still say that. Then from seventh grade to the middle of 10th grade, I went to school in Nigeria. When I came back to the States, I ended up in this English class taught by this really dope, black woman. When we got to the Poetry unit, I didn't know how to write poetry but I ended up writing a piece about women empowerment. I performed it in front of the class and I got a standing ovation. I was like, "Wow, I'm actually kind of good at this." Then, during my senior year of high school, I took a TV production class and that was the first time I ever held a camera. I thought it was cool how some people used visuals to tell their stories. I had started working around that time so I decided to buy myself a camera. I had also just come out of a terrible breakup so it was perfect timing. I was still using that camera when I got to college.

When did you start doing slam poetry?

After that poetry performance about women empowerment, I found a lot of spoken word videos on YouTube which I became obsessed with. Then, during my freshman year of college, I joined CUPSI, the College Unions Poetry Slam Invitational, so I was competing in poetry slam events across the country. I did that for two years and it was really cool. That was really when I started to express myself more. I just met so many cool people doing their thing: being queer as hell and gay as shit. It was everything I needed. I'm taking a break this year though because I'm not really into slam poetry anymore.

Why is that?

At the time I was doing slam poetry, it was bringing up a lot of trauma in my life. I didn't have therapy and I couldn't deal with it. I feel like people want you to tell them about your traumatic experiences during performances but that's re-traumatizing for me. I needed to take a break. Looking back now, I don't think I'm going to go back to it. I also don't like when my writing is in that "slam poetry format". I realized that when I took poet Ariana Brown's workshop and I was like, "Wow, I hate the way my writing is structured." Once I left that format, I liked my writing a lot more.

How did you get into collages?  

Last year, I was at home for Christmas, and I was really bored. My parents are really strict so when I go home, I don't leave the house that much. So I was like, "Okay, let's make art." I couldn't take pictures though because it was cold, plus I needed models and transportation. I had been seeing people make digital collages so I started making them and they were a really big hit.

“we are more than bodies” by Nwaobiala

Are you still making them?

Definitely. I think digital collages are really cool because you get to put different parts together to create a whole new message. I have one about intergenerational trauma via mothers that's inspired by Safia Elhillo. She has literally some of the best diaspora poems that I've ever read, specifically from her book The January Children. The college is about how cultures that only see women as objects for breeding children, not as a people to be loved, impact our mothers. I think my mother is very much affected by that culture. She's not happy in her marriage but she'll still go around telling people, "At least I kept my man." I'm like, "Who cares?". That nigga stresses her out so why is she happy about that? I think a lot of women are unhappy in their marriages, especially in Nigeria. It makes me so sad. Even more, when I watched the Nina Simone documentary, it reminded me of this intergenerational trauma. Nina Simone was abused by her husband and went on to abuse her daughter. You can see the cycle of trauma within that situation. Now that I think about it, we all remember Nina Simone differently than how she really lived. Exploring that type of trauma and how we interact with our mothers is an example of what my collages are about. Outside of that, I'm also trying to get into music.

I was gonna ask you about that… music is the one thing you haven't conquered yet!

Yeah, I'm trying to get into DJing because I think it's so sexy.

Honestly, it is.

Yeah, but the equipment is a barrier. Same thing with photography. Honestly, all this art shit is extremely expensive. Photography is really expensive. The one lens that I have only cost me $30, so that's good. It's nice but it's not versatile. I've been applying to a million, trillion grants and they’re hard to get so I have to wait until I win some before getting more photography equipment. My laptop is also running out of storage every day because of my YouTube channel. Lol, it's just been a lot.

I love your videos!

Thank you! I actually make my videos via my external hard drive because I can't have them on my laptop. Oh, man. It's a mess. Art is expensive and tedious.

But it's something that you have to continue?

Oh, yeah. Art is the only thing that feels right to me. I'm not drawn to anything else. I don't see myself looking up YouTube videos about engineering, for example. I don't feel any type of drive to do anything but art. I'm interested in a variety of subjects but I like the medium of art. I like how it gets to people and I like making it.

“we are more than bodies” by Nwaobiala

What has your relationship with your parents been like since you started spending more time creating art?

My parents don’t really know about the art thing. See what had happened was, I had told my dad that I was going to go to university as a Bioengineering major to eventually get into medical school, I’m still on an engineering scholarship, but my first semester was so stressful. It was really anxiety-inducing and I was stressed about my GPA all the time. I couldn’t live like that. So I changed my major to Industrial engineering, which even though it’s still STEM, my dad doesn’t approve.

But being a full-time artist is the goal?

Yes. I’m building my brand now with my website and social media. I’m mostly financially independent so even if my parents tell me I can’t do it, I’m just gonna do it.

When did you start identifying with the Diaspora as opposed to just Africans in general?

The Diaspora is home for me. Even though I grew up in Nigeria partly, I can't fully identify with Nigerians because I do have that "Americanness" in me. Whenever I have a dissenting opinion about our culture, they often attribute it to me being "spoiled" or "damaged" by western culture.

Yeah, that "Americanness" will separate you so fast from an African community.

Facts. It's just hard for a lot of people to understand or see any other point of view that's different from theirs. But recently, I've been connecting with a lot of people that I went to boarding school within Nigeria. Some of them are roaring feminists now and that's hella cool. I know two who are queer so I would really like to interview them. In Nigeria, the ignorance about queer identity is real. Actually, I don't even have to go back there to feel the ignorance. I can just go to a family reunion or talk to my Dad. It's really hard to deal with, honestly. It makes me so mad that I need to calm myself down.

Who are some of your influences?

Oh man, this question is so hard! I need to pull out my Instagram. One of the first people that comes to mind is Yagazie Emezi. She's a Nigerian photographer and she's a trailblazer. I like everything that her work revolves around. I also like her personality: she's the type of person to say that the photography industry is really white and male and that they all want you to be a certain type of way. They want you to be quiet and aloof. You're just an artist so you can't have a presence to you. But she's like "Fuck all of that! I'm going to be whoever I want and you should just take it or leave it." She also doesn't let people dangle money in front of her and she's very successful. Who else? Oh, Koffee, the musician! She's just herself and I love it.

What has your networking been like with other artists?

A lot of my friends are artists. I have one friend who I went to school with in Nigeria and in the States as well. Her name is Crystal Anokam and she's an amazing photographer. She's really been my support system because she's also a Nigerian American so she knows what's up. In general, I surround myself with a lot of people from the African Diaspora. If you're Diaspora: I want to value your work, I want to pay for your work, I want to see your work. I care about the stories that you're telling. That's the art I want to see. I hate going to museums sometimes because there's so much white art! If I wanted to see white art, I'd go to church. For example, the MFA in Boston is hella white. I was there one time and this teacher was taking a group of students through the African art section. The teacher said to the students, "Oh yeah, this is the African art. We haven't really talked about Africa this year..." and he just kept speeding past all the work. I was like, "Bruh, this is your chance to talk to your students about our continent!" It's sad because there were black kids in that group too. But yeah, I like to surround myself with people who have that background because they know where I'm coming from. Even if our parents don't support our art, we know that the art that we create matters. It's so important for us to talk about heavy subjects and these stories because no one is specifically scouting for African artists. You have to push yourself into the spotlight. You also need to be able to connect with other people. Ever since I started my YouTube channel, I've had so many people message me and tell me "Damn, I'm going through the exact same thing!" It's nice to hear people say that and to be able to have these difficult conversations. Sometimes I feel like I'm just kind of here by myself. This shit can get rough so that's nice.

You can find more of Nwaobiala’s work at www.nwaobiala.com, on Instagram @nwaobiala, or on YouTube: nwaobiala. 

[thekillerssluts]

Arcade Fire Members Talk Haitian Rum and Keeping It Loud at Their Restaurant Agrikol

It’s been over three years since two members of famed band Arcade Fire — Régine Chassagne and Win Butler — opened a restaurant in Montreal’s Village. Working with Toronto restaurateur Jen Agg and her partner Roland Jean, Agrikol quickly became a go-to for Haitian food and rum-laden cocktails, and then even more of a hub when next-door bar Ti-Agrikol opened.

Agg and Jean left the restaurant in 2018 to focus on their Toronto businesses (perhaps the most amicable split ever, notes Butler), but the restaurant is still going strong. Butler, Chassagne, and Agrikol chef Paul Toussaint sat down with Eater to talk about it.

So Win, you’re from Texas; Régine is Haitian but Montreal-raised, and Paul is from Haiti. What are your backgrounds and personal experiences with Haitian cuisine?

Regine Chassagne (RC): For me, it’s more the community aspect of it… I knew [Haitian cuisine] from inside my family, but I didn’t see it anywhere else really, because we were on the South Shore and we weren’t really connected to that much bigger community. It was very insular. But there was always my one aunt, who cooked all these big dishes. And that was like the gathering point for everybody to be able to connect and see the rest of the family.

I always kind of absorbed the longing for that culture from my parents. My mom was just craving the culture, and personally, that’s the reason why I said we have open Agrikol, because I wanted to have a place where Caribbean culture could express itself.

One thing is that I never drank rum in my life until I went to Haiti, because rum to me was disgusting.

Win Butler (WB): I really learned about Haitian culture through Regine’s family and I didn’t know much about Haiti before we met, and so I would go to these Christmas parties and stuff, and her uncles would be talking about Haiti, and it was all stuff that Regine had heard her whole life, and so it was just almost like background noise to a certain extent. It’s like just people lamenting what was going on in the country. And I was really coming to it as an outsider, and I found it all really interesting and wanted to know more.

WB: And then when we first went to Haiti, it was before the earthquake, and my takeaway whenever I visited Haiti, is the art and the music and the food. And when people in general think about Haiti, they think about the earthquake or they think about poverty. And for me, those things are really far down the list of things that come to mind.

Paul Toussaint (PT): For me Haitian cuisine is — it’s my childhood. I grew up in a family that was very mobile...most of the family moved when I was seven years old and I had just one person looking after me. So on Saturdays, I would cook — [that nanny] cooked much of the rest of the time.

I left Haiti at 18 years for Ottawa, but there aren’t a lot of places there that do Haitian food. My dad, he didn’t like eating out of the fridge at all. He wants like, a real meal each day. So I started to cook every day, every day. But at the time, I was at law school — it was what my dad wanted. I was more comfortable cooking than at law school — so I had to choose between the two. I chose cooking, and later went on to to more gastronomic cuisine. I worked at [prominent Montreal restaurant] Toqué — but after two years, I realized I didn’t like that culinary style. It was too experimental, I didn’t feel the heart and spirit of it, even if the plates were impressive. So I went back to Haiti, and ended up doing some of that experimental-style cooking still, but moved more into Haitian food.

Are there other things that you want people to know about Haitian food or drink, like the Montrealers who come to Agrikol?

WB: One thing is that I never drank rum in my life until I went to Haiti, because rum to me was disgusting. [Growing up], it was Bacardi and Malibu and like whatever gross stuff. But when I had Barbancourt and then when I had Clairin, it’s different. In the same way that there’s the a diversity of product for mezcal in Mexico, rum in Haiti is wild and amazing and has such a crazy diversity of products. Going to Haiti made me realize that rum was an amazing spirit.

And in terms of food, is there one thing you want people to know about Haitian cuisine?

WB: Well, one thing that’s interesting to me is that Paul is from Jacmel on the south coast of Haiti and his seafood is incredible. A lot of people are surprised that we have seafood here. But to me, when I think of Haiti, I think of seafood. The lobster I’ve had in Haiti is the best lobster, and my parents are from Maine.

WB: Paul does a dish of octopus with djon djon [a Haitian black mushroom] risotto. It’s my favorite plate of food in Montreal. And I know I own a restaurant, but it’s beautiful, like I’m obsessed with it, it’s so good.

PT: Yeah, and there’s the ceviche, and all the other seafood I sell. But when people [in Montreal] are talking about Haitian food, they always think about griot[a fried, spiced pork dish] and rice and beans. People eat griot at night [as a street food] because it’s like something before you go to bed. It’s not something people are going to cook during the day. But in Montreal, we have a lot of things to discover about Haitian food.

Do you have other favorite restaurants in Montreal, Haitian or otherwise? What do you eat at other times?

WB: I love [neighbourhood restaurant] Larry’s, just for the vibe more than anything. But traditionally, for my money, just a really straight, French bistro in Montreal is about as good as it gets.

People comment, “The music is so loud.” But in Haiti, every Sunday, you’re going to see people just having music like this, they’re cooking, they’re talking like this.

Regine, what do you like to eat outside?

RC: This is it for me. [Agrikol] makes me happy. I can eat at a lot of amazing places around the world, ooh la la, but when I’m here, I’m happy. I like that this place receives all kind of people. It’s just the diversity of people that come here.

WB: French, Anglo, black, white, African, Haitian

PT: Everyone eats here.

WB: It reminds me of when I moved to Montreal, the kind of melting pot vibe.

RC: I love, you can show up in jean shorts, you can show up in a prom dress. You can show up with your tie and a suit or like in a jersey, a sports jersey, and it’s all fine. It’s really you come as you are.

PT: For me, when I see, the first time when I came to Agrikol, when [former owner] Roland wanted to meet me, I came here and I saw this is like the Montreal that I know.

WB: The other magical thing I would say here is the music. If you go to a really good Italian restaurant, you aren’t going to necessarily listen to Italian music. It’s sort of annoying to walk in and it’s like, “Mamma mia.” At a French restaurant, you don’t necessarily want to just hear just Edith Piaf all night, it’s weird. But this restaurant, the music is blasting and the music is part of the food. There’s like literally a spirit to it, which is very rare. In a way it’s sort of a Caribbean thing.

PT: Yeah, Agrikol is like every Sunday in Haiti. On Sundays, people blast the music. Because when I come inside, people comment, “The music is so loud.” But in Haiti, every Sunday, you’re going to see people just having music like this, they’re cooking, they’re talking like this.

It feels like Agrikol sort of hit a sweet spot like what you’re describing, it’s nice, it’s casual, anyone can come in jean shorts. But when the restaurant opened, some people expressed concern that it would become a tourist thing, because of the Arcade Fire tie in and all of that. How do you think you avoided it becoming this kind of tourist spot?

RC: Because it is genuine. It’s real. It’s not pandering to anything in particular. It is what it is.

WB: And I think it’s true to the [inclusive] spirit of what the Village is. I’ll give you an example. Next door at [bar] Ti-Agrikol, we have CDJs, controllers for DJing, which if you’re like a 21-year-old Haitian kid from Montreal North who’s like a DJ, you don’t necessarily have access to a CDJ. And our manager Ralph started letting kids come in and practice DJing in the afternoon when we’re setting up.

WB: And it’s a little thing, but it’s a community thing. It’s not a pretend community. There’s actually a communal musical, spiritual element. And it wasn’t like we made a rule that we should do that. It’s just something that naturally kind of happened. So then you have some really talented people that have a chance to express themselves and that feeds the culture and it feeds people. And then it like literally feeds people because then people can have work, like get a gig DJing and pay rent.

With running a restaurant and bar, and all the touring, do you cook for yourselves ever?

WB: I cook, I mostly cook. I grill a lot and pasta. I like making pasta.

RC: You’re a good cook.

WB: Roast duck, roasting vegetables.

RC: It’s not just pasta. He does a lot of stuff.

So lastly, any plans on opening a second restaurant? Maybe a pasta place?

WB: Yeah, no plans.

PT: We need Agrikol to stay here, minimum, another 50 years. I need Agrikol to be here representing the culture, and because it’s a big challenge. In Montreal, keeping a restaurant alive for 10 years, for 20 years, that’s big.

RC: No. But I want to say thank you to everyone who’s coming to Agrikol.