#But i'll have more time to work and can graduate faster now

[ghostsandfools]

Me after switching to homeschool, effectively leaving all my friends and my romantic partner to fend for themselves, so I can stop having mental breakdowns in the middle of class:

At least I can write more tsams fic now :)

[a-b-riddle]

Part Five

Can't stop thinking about the attempt of reconciliation and reader ain't having it. Our girl is going to be wilddddd y'all. Also goodnight. See y'all tomorrow (maybe)

You call Meredith when you get home.

You. Are. Fuming. She's not sure she can ever remember a time you using so many swear words at one time.

How fucking dare them? Immature? You're the immature one? You were the one trying your best to salvage four failing relationship meanwhile none of those assholes could be bothered to try and keep one. They had one person to manage: you.

"I wanna go out this weekend." "Wear something tight and borderline risk indecent exposure."

"You know what I always say," Meredith begins. "The best way to get over someone-"

"is to get under someone else." You finish. You weren't exactly keen on the idea of bringing someone to your bed just yet, but a little attention would do you some good. "I don't want to fuck someone just yet." You admitted. "I'm more on the getting drunk and making out."

"I didn't know we resorted back secondary school heavy petting?" She teased.

"University, Dear." You corrected. "I didn't peak until after I graduated."

"No." She argued. "You didn't put your books down long enough to realize that boys actually wanted to fuck you." You were glad she couldn't see you roll your eyes. "Saturday work for you? I have a late night Friday and won't be up for it."

"That works."

"Sorry." She apologized. "I plan on getting you absolutely smashed so I need to be ready to play the nanny. I know how you love to get drunk and run off."

It was true. You had always found it hilarious when you were drunk to just run. Quite literally run away. It got to a point during university where Meredith would handcuff you to her so you didn't stray.

"I won't run." Your sober mind promised.

"Uh huh." Meredith's tone told you that she knew that was a load of shit. "I'll text Tabs. Let her know the plan."

The next day at the shop was pretty uneventful. No more unexpected visitors. You still had them all blocked. Not caring if now they decided to offer up some bullshit apology.

Months. This had been a steady decline for six months. A text or a simply sorry won't fix this. You weren't sure anything could.

But it didn't matter. You were done and they obviously were too.

You had picked up enough take out to feed a family, but you didn't plan on making your lunch before work or cooking when you got home. The rest of the week you planned on just going through the motions until you could go out Saturday and hopefully get everything out.

You weren't paying attention as you walked down the hallway to your flat. Fishing in your purse for keys. You were at almost at your door when you saw him.

Sitting next to your door was a familiar face. A face you felt you haven't seen in forever.

“What are you doing here, Kyle?" Your voice was flat as you continued to blindly try and find your keys with one hand. Fuck. You really need to clean out your purse...

“My key wouldn’t work.” He explained. "So I’m out here.”

"I'm aware why you're not in my apartment since I changed the locks," you said, trying to keep your irritation at bay. "What I am asking is why did you come here?"

"You won't return any of our messages."

"You're all blocked, so technically I didn't really get any messages." "Besides, you don't get to complain to me about not responding to texts, Kyle Garrick." Your fingers finally wraps around them. God bless. "If you're here for your things, it'll have to wait. I have to sort through everyone's shit and I don't know whose is whose."

"We need to talk." He explains as you put the key into the lock, opening the door.

"Nah," you say scrunching your nose in that way he used to adore. "I'm good. But you can swing by tomorrow and pick up your things if you'd like." You say before trying to shut the door on him. You were stupid in thinking you could be faster than him.

Dammit.

"I know things haven't been good and I've definitely could have been better,'' he admits. "But can you at least try and let us apologize? Let us try and work it out."

"No." You answered, trying to close the door. Not caring if you had to resort to kicking his shins to get him out.

"Why not?" He countered.

“Maybe because I've already tried, Kyle?” You gave up on trying to shut him out. You were strong, but he didn't have any issues in besting you. “Because I actually tried with you. With all of you. You didn’t need to come here giving me excuses about your life being hectic because I’ve made the excuses for you.” You didn't miss how he practically flinched. He had always blamed his busy life. Family. Work. You stopped caring about whatever excuse he gave you and realized it was just that. An excuse. “I’ve been telling myself for months that everything you guys didn’t do for me wasn’t because you didn’t care about me. It was because of the stress of your deployments is the reason none of you tell me when you get back from until it’s time to fuck. I tell myself it’s because of the fucked up situation of me being with all of you that makes it awkward to meet your families. Families you all have that I now know I’m not worthy of meeting.” He wanted to correct you. You were. You were worthy. He was an idiot. “It’s not that I need your excuses to make me feel like what you did was justified. No matter what it was, it was apparently to you because you did it.”

He took a step back, processing everything you had said. He had been selfish. You were the reliable constant in his life. Someone he believed he never disappointed. Someone he couldn't disappoint no matter how many times he fucked up.

You took the opportunity to slam the door. Quickly turning the lock before he had a chance to open it back up.

God...

That felt good.

You had spent that evening collecting their thing in case Kyle did show back up tomorrow. You wouldn't make their lives easier by sorting all their shit and organizing it. Everything. One box. Let them figure it out. You almost had a mind to add a shirt that you knew didn't belong to any of them just to have them argue over it. Or least make them think there was someone else...

You were almost tempted if not for the premise that you wanted them to realize this was their fault. Their fuck up. But now that you were officially all broken up, you were free game.

[togenabi]

with flowers under the stars

inumaki toge x fem!reader (royalty au)

♡—Toge does his best to impress you, even when others might not want him to.

previous♡— [PART 1]

word count♡— 4.1k words (oml)

genre♡— fluff, romance, royalty au

aged up characters♡— 18+

content notes♡— potential lovers to actual lovers, mutual pining, courtship, dating, everyone is a prince or princes, older brother!gojo satoru, no use of y/n, romance, very fluff, mentions of engagement and marriage, toge uses sign language, some characters may be ooc >< pls forgive me

author's note♡— after rising from the grave (I'm so sorry this took so long! buT! I'm graduating! AAA) I finally finished the sequel to my first toge fic. thank you so much to those who have appreciated my previous work! now that I'm back, I hope you enjoy this as well! (⁠ ⁠˘⁠ ⁠³⁠˘⁠)♡

Exchanging letters with prince Toge occurred frequently before you finally met again. He talked about many things, but they all ended the same way: mentioning how lovely you are and how he wishes time could run faster so he could meet you.

Toge's kingdom was a week on ship and a day by train away, so visiting was saved for important duties or events. ‘Maybe I should ask your brother to appoint me an official position in the council so I can stay in the palace.’ He wrote to you once. You reply that he doesn't deserve it, since he wouldn't be working with the empire or its people in mind.

He writes back that he fell for you a little more, and you trace that line an infinite number of times before tucking the letter away.

When the day of the banquet finally arrives, Satoru notices that you appear a bit more lavish than you usually care to look during events.

“Why! My dearest sister! How stunning you look! And for my birthday, no less! I love that color on you, your taste has improved so much!” He suddenly gasps dramatically and loudly—so loud, that the maid helping you with your earrings flinches.

“Are those... the earrings I got you last year? But I've never seen you wear them! I would give you a hug if it wouldn't ruin your clothes!”

You ignore him the entire time he fusses over you. He looks nice today, you admit. His hair is styled down which gives him a softer aura, and his white suit with gold details looks pristine. A midnight blue cape drapes over his shoulders and flows down his back. It would be difficult for anyone else to pull it off, but you don't tell him that. Goodness knows he would never let you hear the end of it.

You sigh as you watch him through the vanity mirror, but he only becomes even more giddy at your silence.

“Hey, give me that.” Satoru says to the attendant holding your brush. “Leave us.” He says as he stands behind you to brush your hair. You stare at him in disbelief.

Satoru knows you love when he brushes your hair. Even if you never outright told him, it was obvious that you enjoyed it when he cared for you. But because you were embarrassed to ask him as you got older, he hasn't done it since you were children.

He's silent and focuses on brushing your hair gently. The moment feels strangely emotional, and your resolve to ignore him cracks a bit.

“So...” Satoru meets your eyes in the mirror, then winks. “You and Toge, huh?”

You tsk, letting your resolve fully break. “I should've known you would notice.”

He laughs and places a hand on your shoulder. “Well, he wrote saying his father wanted to trade silk from their territory, and that he would like to stay at the palace to handle the negotiations.”

“...Add that to the letters you're receiving everyday, and it wasn't too hard to piece things together.”

You groan and cover your face in embarrassment. You and Toge weren't exactly a secret, but you didn't want your brother to know until it got more serious.

“So what now?” You dread having to ask. “Are you going to tell me to call it off?”

“Nope.” Satoru says, smiling. “Besides, if you're anything like your dear old brother—which, you are! Don't deny it!—I'll end up driving you into his arms if I try to keep you away.”

His eyes suddenly turn serious as he considers his next words. “He's a good kid... Good enough for you, though? We'll have to see.” He places the brush on the dresser, and takes your hand to help you on your feet.

“But what's important is to know yourself and decide for yourself. Don't let anyone else make that choice for you.” He looks sincere as he places your hand on his arm. “Shall we?”

“Satoru...” You call him, touched. He grins and kisses your forehead.

“And of course, if you end up marrying him, that saves me and the ministers the work of looking for your match!” You slap his shoulder, but he only laughs harder as he escorts you out.

The ballroom was sparkling when you arrived. There were already plenty of guests partaking in the revelries as the event had begun half an hour before. Satoru had insisted on the importance of being fashionably late. Normally, you wouldn't have let him actually be late, but you caved only for today.

“Entering, their Royal Highnesses, The Imperial Crown Prince and The Imperial Princess.”

As you descended the stairs with Satoru, the people bowed and you took that as an opportunity to look for a head of white hair, a mask or a high collar covering half the face.

“You're being too obvious.” Satoru whispered. “He'll show up, don't worry.”

He led you to the center of the hall. You were so caught up on looking for Toge that you had nearly forgotten you were to share Satoru's first dance; as he still wasn't engaged. The both of you took your positions gracefully as the music started to flow through the air.

“I'll spin you a few times.” He was grinning. “Try to spot him.”

And yet, the song ended without you seeing Toge anywhere. After giving a hasty bow to your brother, you went on with your search once again.

Your eyes caught princess Nobara the same moment she did yours. You were about to go greet her when her eyes trailed off to something behind you. When her gaze returns to yours, she's smirking and it makes you turn to look at what she saw.

Toge takes your breath away as he walks up to you. He wasn't wearing a mask, or a high collar like he had been during the previous ball. His suit was pitch black and every bit as elegant as him. Your eyes were immediately drawn to his lips and you blushed when he caught you staring. All you wanted to do was to dance with him so that you had an excuse to be close.

It seemed that he picked up on that, as he bowed and offered you his hand.

“It's good to see you again.” You greet him. He kisses the back of your hand with a smile before sweeping you away to dance.

Suddenly nervous, your words get stuck in your throat as the beginnings of a soft waltz reach your ears. “I... tried looking for you when I arrived.”

Toge leads the dance as effortlessly as he did the first time. It almost amazes you how natural it feels to move and sway with him. He seems pleased to know that you were paying him as much attention as he gave you.

Not wanting to simply dance, you took to asking him questions. “Did your journey here go smoothly?” Toge nods.

“When did you arrive?”

‘Today.’ He mouths.

“Ah. I'll have to take you sightseeing then.” You grin up at him. “Would tomorrow be alright?” You get your answer in the form of Toge grinning back, and before you could prepare yourself, he twirls you around and catches you in an embrace as the song finishes with a flourish. A number of people around you started to clap, and you couldn't help but blush in his arms.

After settling at the less crowded side of the ballroom, Toge explains, ‘I also tried to find you. I arrived as early as I could, and yet you and your brother were late.’ He looks at you almost as if to scold you, but you see mischief in his eyes. ‘I thought that you might be by the window where we met... So I went to check.’

“Oh, I see.” You respond, a bit embarrassed. “I should have warned you about my brother's flair for dramatics. He tends to do that when he's the star of the event.”

‘Do you have any remaining commitments here at the ball?’

That makes you think for a moment. “No, Satoru's the one the people want to bother today. Why?”

Toge gives you a look that makes you want to agree to almost anything he asks. ‘Will you allow me to whisk you away?’

And so you were both running, hand-in-hand and laughing, on your way to that secluded hall with the stained glass window. It shouldn't have been possible, but it felt more magical than before to be with him here again.

Toge slows his steps when you both reach the window. You realize that despite coming to cherish this place, you never sought it out when he wasn't around. Something tells you that would have only made you miss him more.

Looking at you with a serious expression, he begins to sign, ‘I know I have been very upfront about myself caring about you... But I want to ask this properly, because you deserve nothing less than the best.’

‘I would like—if it is alright with you, to formally court you.’

The smile on your face glows before you can help it, and you throw your arms around him.

“I would very much like that as well, my dear prince.” You lean to kiss his cheek.

Toge looks dazed and happy as if drunk on something you had given him. Maybe he was.

The moonlight shining through the glass paints him in a kaleidoscope of colors. Before, the only colors on him were the purple hues in his eyes. And now he stood before you, bright and shining.

‘You look beautiful.’

He took the words right out of your mouth.

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Satoru came to find you the day after the banquet. Naturally, he entered your office without knocking, and unceremoniously dropped a heavy document in front of the one you were already working on.

“What's this?”

“Toge's proposal...”

The floor seemed to sink, your heart and your breath gone along with it. “What?”

“—for the trade negotiations.”

It took everything in your power to not throw the block of papers at him. “You're unbelievable.”

Satoru only hummed. “So is your boyfriend. I can't believe he's making me work right after my birthday! He should be kissing up to me, not giving me paperwork!”

“Last time I checked, he's courting me. Not you.” Nevertheless, you take a few moments to sift through the document. It was very detailed and efficient. You note that the length of the proposal was due to the many alternative plans Toge had prepared. This would certainly help the negotiations go smoothly. Satoru and the ministers merely had to look at the options.

Looking back to your brother, you couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. What was he complaining about, when all he had to do was select the best plan and tweak where it was necessary?

“We're to begin the negotiations in two days. I think his plans have potential—” You couldn't help but snort at that, from what you'd seen, Toge was already excellent. (You were not biased. Not at all.) “But, I don't think the older ministers will be kind to someone who acts like a know-it-all.”

“Toge doesn't—”

“A-ah,” Satoru waves a finger at you, as if you were a child being told what you did wrong. You scowl at him but he ignores it. “This will be a test for him, to see if he's able to win against those old goons.”

“You mean yourself, then?” His expression drops at that, and you don't bother to hide how satisfied that made you feel.

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As the weeks flew by, Toge ended up being a lot more busy than you both anticipated. Despite officially dating, lunches together turned to having tea during breaks; then that turned to catching him in the hallway for a few moments before he had to go.

You didn't understand why his workload only seemed to grow, no matter how much effort he put in. Once, when you caught him just before he entered his chambers, you had asked him if anything was going wrong with the negotiations.

Toge looked exhausted, and yet he gave you a smile that made your heart melt. ‘No, the talks are going well, I suppose I'm just having trouble adjusting to the empire's work culture.’

You must have looked unconvinced, because Toge suddenly leaned in and rested his forehead against yours. Mischievously, he stared into your eyes until you were too flustered to be worried anymore. He laughed when you had to push him away.

That night, he bid you farewell with a kiss to your cheek.

‘Good night, darling.’

The next time you had Toge to yourself for an entire day, it was due to a holiday celebration. Everyone was too occupied with the festivities to work. You were supposed to be at another banquet Satoru had hosted, but you were determined to monopolize Toge's time today.

So you showed up at his door at the earliest respectable hour of the morning, dressed for warm weather and a picnic basket in your hand.

“Will you allow me to whisk you away?” You asked when he answered the door.

You took him on a tour of the parts of the palace he hasn't seen yet. Your office, the private library, and even some of the secret passage ways. His eyes lit up with curiosity when you showed him one behind a portrait.

You had lunch in the gardens, under a tree that offers wonderful shade. A soft blanket laid across the grass, with a spread of the empire's specialty dishes arranged all over it.

“This one,” You show Toge a cookie with flowers piped on top. “Has been my favorite since I was a child. It has just the perfect amount of sweetness, and goes beautifully with tea.”

You move to hand Toge the cookie, but he doesn't take it. Confused, you're about to ask him if anything was wrong when he leans forward and opens his mouth expectantly.

Wordlessly, you raise the cookie to his lips. The moment feels oddly intimate as he takes a bite without removing his gaze from yours.

Toge hums and moves his hands to sign, ‘It's indeed delicious.’ He leans to you and opens his mouth again.

You push the half-eaten cookie into his hands and turn away to hide your blush. “If you're able to tell me what you think about it, you can eat it yourself.”

He breathes out a laugh. Smirking at you while he chews the remaining cookie.

It was so peaceful, just sitting there with him. And it seemed as though you weren't the only one who wanted to sit with Toge. A tiny white butterfly fluttered about before landing on his knee. He looked so enchanted by it. Staring close, but being careful that he didn't move his knee or disturbed it.

The butterfly flying away made you want to explore too. Getting yourself up, you look over your shoulder and gesture for him to follow. He offers you his arm once he catches up, and you rest your hand on it. Birds chirp and leaves rustle in the wind as you walk towards the shimmering lake at the edge of the gardens.

Bracing yourself on Toge's arm, you kick your shoes off. You set them aside to dip your toes into the water. “It's so refreshing!”

Toge feels his chest grow as warm as the sunlight kisses your cheeks. He gets down on one knee to untie his shoes when he's abruptly hit by a splash of water. Flabbergasted, he looks up at you, blinking away the water droplets in his lashes.

Of course, Toge isn't one to back down from a challenge. The result is the both of you shivering and drenched by the time the sun has set. Your maids fuss all over you when you get back to the palace, and the other staff almost faint at the puddles that trail after you and Toge.

It was useless to insist that you could walk alone and that you both should get cleaned up at the soonest. Toge didn't leave your side until you entered your chambers, your gazes only being broken by the door once it closed.

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You got the most dreadful fever after that day with Toge. Satoru, wanting you to rest properly, made you swear not to lift a finger for work related reasons until you got better. Which, you followed without complaint. You took a break for a few days.

Toge did his best to see you, but he only got busier. His eyes looked more and more tired, dark circles under them when you caught him in the library one morning. He stayed there to work overnight. You were barely able to convince him to rest.

On another night, one of your maids caught him trying to sneak in your room, screaming and kicking him out. You could have sworn half the palace had woken up to that, and you couldn't help but hide under your sheets due to the embarrassment.

What irritates you most, however, was that the first thing you heard when you get back is, “Oh. Finally decided to return to your duties, eh?” from a delegate who spent most of his time gossiping, and whose biggest contribution to the empire was refilling the inkwells in the conference room...

The conference room has five inkwells.

Those ministers and court members were proving more and more to be nuisances. You gave them an earful when they had assumed you were slacking off when you were sick.

Not to mention, you suspected that they have been making Toge do more work than he needs to. Even if he never complains, you don't fail to notice how some courtiers turn their noses up at him just because his kingdom was distant and smaller compared to the scale of the empire.

The thought of Toge being belittled makes you pause during work, frowning at a chart of kitchen expenses as if it's done something offensive.

Dropping your pen, you head out of your office with brisk steps. You had to speak to Satoru.

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“Overworking Toge? Why, dear sister, I can't believe you're accusing me of such a thing!” Satoru puts a hand to his heart as if he was wounded by your words.

“Maybe not.” You're not going to let him weasel out of this one. “But you let the other ministers and court members walk all over him! Is Toge supposed to just sit there and take it? He's a prince, damn it!”

“Listen,” Satoru leans forward, his elbows on his desk as he uses his hands while explaining. “The ministers are just a bit frazzled, that's all. They think he forced you to skip the holiday banquet, and that he got you sick. He's good at his work, sure. But in their eyes? He just looks like a bad influence on you.”

You scoff.

“Now,” Satoru interrupts before you can say anything, “They were going to try and match you with prince Megumi—”

“Megumi's already engaged.”

“I know, I know. And that's why they're planning on pitching you with prince Yuji or princess Nobara.”

“I'm already with Toge.” You say sternly. “And what happened to not letting others make my decisions for me?”

“As far as those old goons are concerned, Toge is only the third best for you. ‘For the greatness of the empire’ and all that.” It doesn't escape you that he dodged your question. “They're going to try to push you apart until you break up or get hitched.” He leans back, crossing his arms on his chest. “Whichever comes first.”

“Why don't you stop them?” Frustrated, you run your hands through your hair. “Tell them I really like him and that they should leave him alone!”

“Sweetheart,” Satoru's tone becomes deeper, and you hate how it instantly makes you shut up. “The thing is, if Toge isn't capable of handling this, or if he backs out of your relationship because of it, he's not worth your time.”

You stare at him, unlinking. The thought of Toge leaving you had never occurred to you before, and Satoru could tell.

“I told you I would test him.” He shrugged. “It seems I'm testing you too.”

Rushing back to your office, you grab a piece of parchment and your pen from your desk. Not bothering to sit down as you write: Meet me at the gardens, by the tree. Midnight.

You fold it and hastily stuff it into an envelope. Delicately melting wax, you stamp your seal onto it before calling for your most trusted maid.

Handing her the letter, you instruct her, “Deliver this to prince Toge and prince Toge only. If anyone hinders you or attempts to read it, report back to me immediately. Go.”

She bows, and exits the room.

That night, Toge arrived before you. You note that he has a penchant for being early as he reaches to squeeze your hand. He looks you over to check if you're alright, and despite seeing nothing of concern, he asks anyway, ‘Are you okay?’

“We need to talk.” You nervously purse your lips. “The courtiers, the ministers... My brother. They've been making your work difficult.”

He sighs. ‘You found out.’

“You didn't tell me!” You rest a hand on his cheek, absentmindedly grazing your thumb over the marks near his mouth. “Do you understand what they're trying to do?”

‘Testing me.’

“Yes.” A lump forms in your throat. “Satoru said it's until you give up on me, or if you... propose.”

Heart racing, your hands can't stop fiddling with things. His face. His hair. The fastenings of his suit. “I'm just so worried. I care a great deal about you, and I just wanted to ask if you're enduring this because you want to.” You bite your lip in thought. “If it's because you're sure about... me.”

You can't look at him. You suddenly feel foolish. You should have given it a night and slept on it to gather your thoughts. You should have—

Toge embraces you. Everything stops.

You take in the view of the gardens over his shoulder. It was dark, and there was barely any light save for the stars twinkling above. You closed your eyes and let yourself be held.

Pulling away, he doesn't seem as fazed as you do, if at all. He turns to you slowly, and after taking a deep breath...

‘Marry me, then.’

You choke on air.

“Wh-what?!” A warmth creeps into your cheeks. “What are you—”

He places his hands on your shoulders and stares into your eyes. He gives you a look and mouths, ‘Breathe.’ And you do.

Once you've calmed down, he begins to explain.

‘We can come forward and make a statement that we've been seeing each other with marriage in mind. Which...’ He pauses, suddenly shy. ‘I have. I've been thinking about swearing everything to you... Intertwining my future with yours.’

‘I know it's only been a few months, so we could have a long engagement if you want. For us to get to know each other more. And if—’ Toge's hands freeze, his movements are slow as if the next words pain him.

‘...If you decide to break off the engagement, I will not force you to stay with me.’

You immediately stop his hands, holding them tightly with your own.

“Toge... I wouldn't even consider this with anyone else,” You feel genuinely happy as you smile at him. “But I'm willing to try. With you. Only you.”

He glows in a way that reminds you of when you first met. His expression is soft as if he's melting, and he smiles at you brightly. You think of how lucky you are that he looks at you this way.

‘This isn't the way I wanted it to happen, but...’

Toge picks a small, white flower from a bush nearby. It faintly reminds you of the butterfly that had flown to him the last time you were here together. His eyes are focused and he frowns in concentration as he fiddles with the stem. Your heart stutters as he makes... a delicate ring.

He kneels.

You say yes.

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A letter from you and Toge arrives on Satoru's desk the next day.

‘Dearest brother,

Please approve this statement that prince Toge and I have been seeing each other, and that we have decided to get engaged. You will find the formal document stamped with our seals attached to this letter.

We expect your approval posthaste, and I will not consider any objections. Please let us know when you will be available to discuss the engagement ceremony.’

“Your highness, what should we do with these documents you had forged?”

“Oh. Hand them over.” Satoru waves a hand to dismiss the attendant after retrieving the files.

He gets up from his desk and walks to the fireplace. “I can't believe he proposed before I could falsely accuse him of treason.” He tsks and throws the documents into the fire.

His eyes find a framed photograph on the fireplace mantel. It was of him and you as children. Satoru was laughing after you ran to him for a hug. His gaze grows sad yet understanding... He won't be the first person you'll turn to anymore when you get married.

Sighing, he considers that he should be thankful you chose someone determined and true like Toge. But then Satoru grins.

“I suppose I can always mess with him as his brother-in-law.”

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© togenabi 2023 | see here to be added to my taglist ♡

[crusty-chronicles]

Hi,

Can I request kurama x human reader who share his love for plants and nature which makes him fall for them?

Thanks for considering this requst

An: My man's would be gushing 💯.

Kurama With An S/O Who Loves Plants

It's inevitable he becomes smitten

Someone else who shares his love of plants? You're his.

You start out as one of his classmates.

Just another face in the crowd.

It isn't until you have a project together that he gets to know you.

You'd chosen to do it at your house. It was more convenient that way. There'd be no interruptions and you'd get to finish faster.

There was just one catch though.

“My house is kinda humid. I like to keep the temperature high. If it's too much we could always work in the library,” you explained.

The heat was something he could handle. It wouldn't bother him in the slightest. And when he stepped foot inside, it was pleasantly bearable.

What he was not expecting were the ferns littered around your living room. Along with several other types of potted plants.

They all looked to be well taken care of, too. Seems you had quite the hobby.

He followed you to your room. Fingers skimming over the leaves of a pothos as he passed it. If you saw the action, you didn't mention it.

In your room were a few more plants placed towards the window sill. One in particular caught his attention. Through the foliage he could see glimpses of red.

“An anthurium,” he mumbled out.

“Huh?” You called from your spot on the floor.

He met your confused gaze and offered you a smile.

“You're a bit of a plant enthusiast, aren't you?”

You seemed to light up at his words. Excited to talk about your favorite hobby.

“Are you kidding me? These are my babies. I'm a single mother of about 24.”

Maybe it was a little endearing to see you talk so passionately.

“In all seriousness, I think I'm gonna become a botanist when I graduate. What about you?” You asked.

What would Kurama do? He'd probably be offered a job at his stepfather's company. If something else hadn't killed him first. But he felt like that wouldn't have been a favorable answer.

“I haven't decided yet.” Was his response.

He expected you to pry further. Instead you playfully nudged his shoulder.

“You could always join me.”

Surprisingly, he was left speechless by your offer. You'd wanted him to study plants with you?

“Don't think I didn't notice how you addressed Derek by his full government name.” You gestured to the anthurium behind you.

“You really know your stuff.”

Oh you had no idea.

“You name your plants?” He questioned. You were an intriguing individual.

“Hello? I told you they were my babies. And don't you try to change the subject.” You scolded.

“I'll consider it. How about we start on our project now?”

He figured that would've been the last time he interacted with you. That couldn't have been any further than the truth.

You showed up to his desk the next morning with a small potted plant.

He looked up at you quizzically before you spoke.

“What's this?”

You were trying to test him. A part of him found it cute. You had absolutely no clue how vast his knowledge was. Of both this world and the demon one.

He took you up on your challenge without hesitation.

“Bear’s Paw succulent. Also known as the Cotyledon tomentosa.”

“Aha!” You cheered triumphantly. As if you caught him red handed on something. Whatever connection you think you just made, he'd never know.

It became a daily habit of sorts.

Every morning you'd stop by his desk with something new.

The same question of ‘what’s this?’

And he'd always answer correctly.

You were persistent in whatever endeavor you were chasing. He thought you would've gotten bored by now, yet you kept at it.

Little by little, he starts to consider you a friend. He started anticipating your presence in the morning. Enjoying how you stuck around after quizzing him now. Getting to know each other more and more.

You didn't fawn over him like the girls in your class. And you weren't jealous of him like the boys. You were just you. And somehow you wormed your way into his life for the better.

You trusted him wholeheartedly with your plants. Even going as far as to ask him to take care of one for you.

“I have to go on a family trip. Watch Cornelius for me.” You'd looked up at him with pleading eyes. Ones he found himself unable to say no to. So he (not so) begrudgingly said yes.

A cactus. You gave him a cactus to look after.

He makes it bloom for you by the time you get back.

“Some green thumb you have.” You mused once you got it back. A small feeling of pride washing over him.

Eventually Kurama starts returning the favor and bringing you plants instead.

The first time he did it, he had left a special type of rose on your desk.

“What's this?” His words mirroring yours.

You gave a smirk at the challenge.

“Easy. It's a Falstaff rose.” you answered.

“Now what's this~” you pulled what looked like a white and pink flower from behind you.

“A trick. That's an orchid mantis.”

“Damn. I almost had you.”

Every now and then he'll throw you off by growing a plant from the demon world.

“Is that a hybrid of some sort?” You asked, prodding at the rather sentient looking plant.

Did it just blink at you?

“It's cool whatever it is. How'd you get your hands on it?”

By now your guessing games had started to take place out of school and in your homes. Right now, you were at Shuichi’s because he said he ‘wanted to show you something.’

He appeared amused by your curiosity.

“I have my ways.” He responded.

“This plant is carnivorous. It produces a saliva stronger than acid.” Though he'd never let it hurt you.

And instead of being frightened by it, you were ecstatic.

“Let's feed it a bunch of things!” You suggested.

Did you hear that? That was the sound of his heart beating in overdrive. You were a very brave human.

But you also found beauty and wonder in things most would cower at.

He makes sure to bring and grow you more plants from demon world. Most of them are relatively harmless.

As long as you don't get too close that is.

It becomes a new game for you to guess what they do. What makes the flowers bloom. The conditions they thrive in.

Most of the time you end up being correct. Using your prior knowledge to make logical guesses. It's surprising how accurate you are for a human. But then again, you weren't exactly normal.

He's still not over how you fed that plant your entire backpack.

He would be lying if he said he hadn't taken an interest in you.

Not just because of your shared hobby. He liked how you made it a point to check on him everyday. How you'd let him ramble on excitedly about some new fauna. The way you explored and investigated something new without fear. The exaggerated movements of your hands when you were talking passionately.

All of it had pulled him in little by little.

He makes it a point to confess to you in a way only you two would understand.

“What do all these mean?” He asked you, presenting you with a small bouquet.

“Oooh! Going the extra mile today? You're on.”

You took the flowers from him and began mentally listing them off.

You hadn't taken in the full context until you were already speaking.

“Red carnations mean my heart aches for you. Forget me nots mean true love. Baby's breath means everlasting love. And a rose means passion…Oh.”

It hit you like a truck then, the implications of why he might've gave you this. Was this still part of your usual game?

You looked to Shuichi who didn't hide the softness in his expression.

“You're being serious? I…”

‘Say yes you idiot!!!!’ You internally screamed at yourself.

Instead you plucked one of the flowers and offered it back to him.

“Here's my answer.”

You'd given him the rose in return.

------------------

An: yeet! Google came in clutch for this one.

[nicoline1998enilocin]

So my request would be for ransom.

Male reader (23) bratty soft dom top to a stuck up needy bottom Ransom (26)

Reader graduated art school for illustration but has been just living art life as a ceramics teacher when gets a call from his family about the arranged marriage between him and ransom that was signed over from both their parents when they were kids. For readers family is also another publishing house mainly for graphic novels etc.

Reader and Ransom meet up at thrombes after many years bickering about how they don’t wanna be married. They have rings they have to wear as fiancés before the wedding and cnat have outside relationships.(ransom pissed about that)

Reader goes back to work. Ransoms shows up one late evening as reader is cleaning up and gets on readers nerves and then turns spicy 🥵

They have to go to another dinner at thrombey and reader defends ransom against his drysdale and thrombeey family. Ransom likes that and is falling hard for the reader but ignores it for it’s an arrange marriage and such

But as per the contract have to live together feelings bubble up during a fight and ransom confesses to the reader and runs away cuz he doesn’t know how to deal but reader returns feelings and stuff! Idk I’m not good at writing!!

But yeah!! Love how u write sub ransom!! -⚡️⚡️⚡️

A special bond

PAIRING | Sub!Ransom Drysdale x Soft Dom!Male!Reader

WORD COUNT | 4.2K

SUMMARY | You're forced into an arranged marriage with the one and only Ransom Drysdale, even though neither of you likes the other. After being forced to be close to one another, the tension keeps rising, and it all takes a steamy turn once one of you finally snaps and gives into their feelings.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Angst, arranged marriage to lovers, swearing, smut [ Sub!Ransom, Soft Dom!Reader, Oral (both receiving), daddy kink, praise kink, implied vanilla sex, unprotected anal sex (wrap it before you tap it!), implied aftercare ].

A/N | Thank you for this fantastic request, sweet Nonnie! This will be my first time writing for a male! reader, so I hope I can do it justice. I had lots of fun exploring more of our favorite Sub!Ransom, so I hope you will enjoy the route I chose for this fic 🖤

Likes, comments and reblogs will be very much appreciated 💚

Divider is made by @firefly-graphics | 18+ banner is made by yours truly,

Main Masterlist | Ransom Drysdale Masterlist

The last bell of the day just went off, and it's time to clean your classroom before going home for the weekend. You've planned to have a leisurely weekend at home, work on some of your digital art, or read a book or two.

Just when your mind wanders to one of the books waiting for you at home, your phone rings in your back pocket, so you put down some of the clay you were about to put away and fish it out, sighing as you see who's calling you.

''What?!'' you spit out at the phone, already annoyed about her calling you. She never calls with any good news, and you have a clue this time would be the same.

''Hello to you too,'' she starts, and you let out a sigh at her comment.

''Tell me what's going on, or I'll hang up,'' you say, but she cuts you off mid-sentence.

''You're coming to dinner at the Thrombey household tomorrow, and you can not say no. Be there at 8 PM, and don't be late,'' she says before saying goodbye and hanging up.

Your heart starts beating faster at the thought of going over there, and you don't like what's probably going on. You drop your phone on your desk and continue cleaning up, reviews of tomorrow taking over your mind.

Tomorrow evening has come way too soon for your liking, and now you're getting ready after your shower, your beard neatly trimmed before putting on your outfit for dinner at the Thrombeys.

As much as you hate your Mom, you would never go against her demanding you be somewhere, having learned that years ago, you do as she says, just to be gone soon after it starts.

When you're ready, you grab your keys and phone before heading out the door and towards your car. When you get in, you close your eyes tightly and hold onto your steering wheel a little too hard to keep yourself calm before driving; you don't want to end up in an accident.

On your drive to the Thrombey estate, you keep thinking about why you ever said no to that job on the other side of the world; that way, you would have to deal with any of these people, especially not your Mom.

When you arrive at the estate, you see a car you didn't want to see, Ransom's Beemer. After a sigh, you put your car in park and put on your jacket before stepping into the cold air outside, ready to walk into the lion's den.

You walk up to the front door and ring the bell, waiting to be walking into literal hell. It doesn't surprise you when the devil herself opens the door, either.

''Hello, Linda,'' you say with faux politeness.

She lets you in after a sigh, barely acknowledging your existence, and you prefer keeping it that way. After taking off your coat and walking into the dining room, you're greeted by Harlan Thrombey, Linda, Richard Drysdale, their son Ransom, and your parents.

After greeting everyone except Ransom, you sit at the table and avoid his gaze. The two of you were the best friends growing up, but after a huge fight, you were never the same and have never seen each other since.

While dinner is served, Linda decides to cut right to the chase, and when she does, you nearly spit out your food all over the table.

''You-'' Linda points at you, and then to Ransom, ''-are getting married later this year,'' she says, and that's all you hear before everything blacks out, and you've fainted.

In the meantime, Ransom has been arguing about not wanting to get married to you - or at all, for that matter - which only made you feel worse by the time you've gotten back into consciousness.

''I'm not fucking marrying him, you are out of your minds!'' Ransom yells at both your parents by the time you're back, and that comment does sting a little. It's not like you were planning on getting married, but that's beside the point.

''D-Do we have any say in this?'' you say, finally back on earth with a pounding headache.

''No, it's all been dealt with, and from now on, both of you are in an exclusive relationship, or I guess I should say you two are officially engaged. That means not fucking everything that moves, Ransom,'' Linda says with a pointed tone.

Ransom's not happy with that, though you have less of a problem. Regardless, it's not like you were in a relationship or getting laid regularly.

The rest of the evening goes by quickly, and most of it goes over your head. All you know is that you'll have to marry the man you've had a huge falling out with, which will happen in less than a few months.

''Thank you for coming, darling. I can't wait to see you on your wedding day,'' your Mom says with a fake smile, and you give one back that's just as fake, trying to keep up appearances.

Today's the day you're officially marrying Ransom, and even though you're very nervous, there's a small part inside of you that's also excited.

If it wasn't for the fact that this is arranged and you have zero say in anything, you would be looking forward to this day, but you don't.

So here you are, in front of the wedding aisle, guests seated, looking at the man you'll be married to in less than a few minutes. His eyes look both angry and... desperate. That can't be right, you think to yourself, and you almost miss the moment you have to say, 'I do.'

''Do you take Hugh Ransom Drysdale to be your lawfully wedded husband? Do you promise to love, comfort, honor, and keep him for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health and forsaking all others, be faithful only to him so long as you both shall live?''

''I do,'' you say almost breathless, the realization sinking in that you're about to seal your wedding to your husband with a kiss, one that you have thought many times but were sure would never happen.

Faith can be funny sometimes. And a little cruel, too. But it's mostly funny.

''I now pronounce you two married!'' the officiant says before stepping aside, ensuring he's not in the way of your and Ransom's first kiss. As you take a deep breath, you step closer, and your hand moves to Ransom's waist.

Before you can fully move to him and meet in the middle, Ransom crashes his lips onto yours, knocking the air out of your lungs before you kiss him back; this surprises you.

Despite the surprise, you kiss him back with just as much, if not more, vigor now that you have gotten a taste, and you're immediately addicted, already chasing his lips when he pulls away.

''Let's get out of here,'' you say, and Ransom nods as if a switch inside him was flipped, and you could see it in his eyes. You've seen that look before in some other men, but seeing it in your husband's eyes have you chubbing up in your pants. Ransom is a sub.

You two rush to the suite where you had gotten ready before the wedding, and you quickly close the door behind you as you push Ransom against it.

Your lips immediately find each other again, and you can feel yourself getting even harder now, your dick straining painfully against the zipper of your pants, but you ignore it for now. All you want now is to make Ransom feel good so he can make you feel even better.

Soft moans leave Ransom's lips as you kiss your way down his jaw and neck as you take off his jacket, untie his tie, and unbutton his shirt to expose his beautiful chest to you.

''You look so good, Baby. Are you going to let Daddy make you feel so good?'' you ask, and Ransom's eyes gloss over at the thought, and all he can do is nod slowly.

''Words,'' you demand, and Ransom feels himself getting harder at the demand, his submissive side feeling even better now. And it's not that he doesn't want to talk, but it feels like his whole body is on fire with pure lust, his brain has gone fuzzy from pleasure, and his throat feels filled with cotton balls.

Yet, he manages to squeak out a small yes at your demand, and you reward him with lots of praise and soft kisses on your way down, leaving a kiss between every praise, not leaving a single inch of his chest and stomach untouched.

''You're doing so well for me, listening to me. You're being such a good boy for me, Baby,'' you tell him until you have found your spot on the floor, and your hands are unzipping Ransom's pants and pulling them down to uncover his rigid member.

And when it does, your eyes almost pop out of your head from the surprise because Ransom's a lot bigger than you had anticipated, but you're determined to take every last inch of him in your mouth.

''Holy fuck...'' you whisper before wrapping your hand around his length and slowly moving up and down, earning yourself a bit of pre-cum that leaks from his tip, and you gladly lick it up.

Ransom's head falls back against the door you pushed him against with a loud thud and a groan at the feeling of your hand and mouth on him, and he almost can't take it. Almost. Because on your way down, you told him he's not allowed to cum without permission, and he wants to be your good boy so badly.

To surprise him, you take him into your mouth without warning, and the sound he makes ensures you're fully hard as well at this point, so you open your pants and take yourself out, giving your cock a few leisurely strokes.

The groans you let out at the feeling of him in your mouth are slowly creeping up Ransom's spine, his hands in fists on the side of his body to not make himself cum yet.

You slowly work more of him into your mouth until you take him altogether, thankful for your lack of gag reflex now. You stay like this for a few long seconds before pulling off him and giving Ransom his last order.

''Fuck my throat until you cum for me, Baby. And let Daddy hear how good he makes you feel,'' you say before wrapping your lips around him again, and Ransom does as you tell him, chasing his orgasm as you suck him.

The moans and groans from Ransom are almost pornographic, but it feels so fucking good. Before you know it, you're cumming with a loud cry, too, your cum spurting out in long spurts over the tiles in the room, followed closely by Ransom shooting his into your throat, letting you swallow it all.

''Good boy,'' is the last you say before cleaning him up and ensuring he's come down from his high enough to get back to the party because the two of you are supposed to cut the cake, but you were nowhere to be found.

Ever since the wedding, Ransom hasn't changed a single bit, and he's still stuck up as ever, but now you're living together with his ass too. And that's gained you more fights than you could have ever thought.

But this evening, something felt different. Usually, when Ransom would be late, he would always let you know, but this time he didn't. And even though you don't want to admit it to yourself, you're worried.

You grab your phone again and call Ransom, but to no avail; he needs to pick up. Not even 5 minutes later, you hear the front door open, and Ransom walks in, acting like nothing was happening like you didn't call him three times to see if he's okay. Like he didn't have you worried to death about him.

''Where the fuck have you been?'' you spit out as soon as he walks into the kitchen.

''Why the fuck do you care? It's not like we like each other, so fuck off,'' Ransom spat back at you, but he knows he crossed a line. Despite this, he keeps walking, your eyes burning a hole in the back of his head.

''I care because you're my husband, Ransom. You may not like it, but you're still my husband; we're still married. I thought something had happened to you!'' you say with a raise of your voice, which has Ransom stopping in his tracks.

Despite all your fights over the littlest things, tonight is the first time you've raised your voice at him. And it has the effect you had hoped it would have because he turns around and looks at you mournfully.

''Are you seriously pouting at me? You are fucking unbelievable, Ransom. You know what? I think I'm going to have to punish you for it. Maybe that way you'll learn some actual human decency,'' you say dryly, but Ransom shakes his head.

''Did you forget who's talking here? I believe I am in charge, and you are supposed to listen to me. Get your ass upstairs and get ready in the position. You're not allowed to touch yourself tonight, and you will have to wait until I get there even to move as much as a single muscle,'' you order, and off he goes.

You sigh as you finish the dishes and put the leftovers you saved for Ransom into the fridge. You may be angry at him, but you're not inhumane. He'll have to eat later.

Ransom's been sitting in the bedroom for half an hour, and his knees are starting to hurt, but it gives him an excellent chance to think about what he did. And he did just that, so when you walk into the bedroom with only your boxer briefs still on, he looks up at you with an expectant look.

''Don't look so happy, Ransom. This isn't your punishment yet,'' you tell him, and you can't help but smile at how you see his eyes roam over your chest and abdomen to the tent you've pitched in your underwear.

As much as Ransom gets on your nerves, you still get off on the dynamic the two of you have. Ransom is the needy and subby bottom, insatiable at the best times. You are the equally needy but very giving Dom. This makes every fight worth it because you know you two have nothing but respect for the other person in these moments.

Though Ransom has a funny way of showing it.

''Have you thought about what you did?'' you ask, your voice dropping a little deeper on purpose, which has the desired effect as you see the chill going down Ransom's spine. He's almost where you want him; he needs one last push.

''Y-Yes, Daddy,'' he croaks out, and you slowly walk over to where he's sitting on the bed on his knees, his arms behind his back and his dick soft between his legs. Perfect.

''And?''

''I was h-home late and didn't t-tell you I w-would be,'' he says, a tear escaping and softly trailing down his face. You climb onto the bed and crawl your way to Ransom, grabbing his face softly in your hands, and you bring his forehead to your lips to calm him down.

''I-I'm so s-sorry, Daddy,'' he hiccups through his tears, and you know he is sorry. Seeing this side of him always made you feel a little bad for him, and you don't want him to sink into it too deep, so you pull him into your chest, ignoring all your needs right now and just calming him down.

''Sshhh, I know you are, Baby. It's okay, you're being a good boy for me right now,'' you assure him, and you wrap his hands around your waist as well, pulling him as close as you possibly can while whispering sweet words to him, and he's feeling better.

You pull away and look at him before placing a small kiss on his forehead.

''Do you want to continue with your punishment right now? If not, we will do it when you're in a better headspace,'' you say, and Ransom shakes his head. He doesn't want to continue right now.

''It's okay, come on. Let's lay down and cuddle for a bit, and then we can get some dinner in you,'' you say, but Ransom doesn't budge.

''Want you...'' he says, and this time, he looks into your eyes with pure desire. His eyes are red from crying, and his cheeks are flushed, which gives him an almost innocent look, and you feel a fire deep inside you burning for him.

Feelings you're not ready to give into. It's an arranged marriage; you shouldn't have feelings for this man, but it's getting harder to deny that you do.

Instead of the punishment, you guided Ransom slowly onto his back while giving him lots of kisses, and your lips met in a passionate, love-filled kiss that seemed to go on forever, but it was precisely what the two of you needed now.

The rest of the evening is spent wrapped up in one another, having slow vanilla sex, and it is the first time the two of you are spending your time like this.

Both of you are entirely spent at the end of the evening, and you wouldn't want it any other way. When you two were done, you took a shower together and reheated dinner for Ransom before sitting on the couch and watching TV together.

You both went to bed at the same time and shared more soft kisses and lots of cuddles and suddenly, it felt like this marriage thing might not be so bad after all. If only you could stay in this bubble forever.

''Are you ready to go? We have dinner, remember?'' you tell Ransom, and he walks into the bedroom after getting dressed; you put on your outfit as well.

''How can I forget if you mention it every fucking second of every day?!'' Ransom says as he throws his hands up in the air. Usually, you would have reprimanded him, but he's under much stress due to this dinner, so you let it slide for now.

''Right, I'm ready to go,'' you say after fixing your hair and beard one last time, and you walk out the front door to your car, followed closely by Ransom.

''No, we're taking my car. I'm not getting in that beemer of yours,'' you sigh as you unlock your car, and Ransom sighs, so you send him a pointed look.

''Don't even think about it, Ransom. We don't have time,'' you say, and he gets into the passenger seat of your car without another word. It's quite a long drive, and after a while, you let your hand rest on Ransom's thigh without thinking about it, but Ransom tenses under your touch.

''Oh, fuck,'' you say, and you pull back, but Ransom grabs hold of your wrist and places it back on his thigh without saying a word, and he looks out the window. You can't help but let a small smile escape your lips.

Ransom runs out of your car and into the house when you arrive. He got painfully hard from your hand being so close to where he needed you the most, and he needs some relief.

''What do you think you're doing?'' you ask as you open the bathroom door, and Ransom immediately stops his actions and gets bright red at the fact that he got caught.

''C'mere, let me help you. Want to have Daddy make you feel so good?'' you ask, and Ransom nods shyly. You sink on your knees and take him into your mouth immediately, and it doesn't take long for Ransom to cum in your throat, making you swallow it all.

''Good boy,'' you say before stuffing him back into his pants and heading for dinner.

''W-What about-''

''Later. Now it's time for dinner,'' you say, and Ransom nods before following you into the dining room, where most of his family is already seated.

The conversation landed on the two of you quickly, and you answered every question without missing a beat, glancing over at Ransom repeatedly.

It isn't until Richard makes one more rude comment under his breath about the two of you that you completely snap, and a sea of emotions comes out in a steady stream.

''What is your fucking problem?! You can talk to us like normal humans if you have a problem with me and Ransom. And besides, it is because of you that ensured we're in this to begin with. We have never done anything wrong; we're just living the life that you forced upon us, so you should leave us the fuck alone. Asshole!''

With those words, you storm out of the dining room and hear Ransom say something to them as well, but you're too far away to what exactly.

You run outside and into your car, needing to escape everyone for a while. You can't look at them, and especially not your husband, so you decide to take a drive. Despite running after you as fast as he can, Ransom can only watch as you drive without him.

After about 30 minutes of driving, you stop on the side of the road, and your emotions all come out; you hit the steering wheel, crying and screaming, anything to make yourself feel better, but nothing works.

''What the fuck did I do to deserve this?! I'm fucking married to a guy who hates me, I have a shitty job, and I can't even talk to anyone without feeling like I'm out of place,'' you yell against nothing, and it feels good to finally get those feelings out, even though they're only followed by more tears.

You're ripped from your thoughts when you receive a call from Ransom, but you don't answer the first time. Immediately, he calls again, and this time, you do answer.

''The fuck do you want, Ransom? Can't you leave me alone?'' you sigh as you wipe your tears, but hearing his voice only worsens it. The small fire inside you has become a complete sea of flames, and you can't hide your feelings anymore. But neither can Ransom.

''No, I can't. And you know why? Because I fucking love you. I didn't want to admit it since we're forced into this, but I love you, okay? And I need you to come home because it's fucking unbearable without you here,'' Ransom sighs, and you can't help but laugh.

''The fuck are you laughing at?'' Ransom spits over the phone, but you can't help but laugh uncontrollably because you finally know you feel the same as he does.

''I fucking love you, Ransom. I have for years, even before the fucking fight that tore us apart. So yeah, that's why I agreed to this marriage with you. But it feels so fucking good to tell you I love you, Ransom. I always have, and I promise you every single day from now on just how much,'' you say before driving back to the Thrombey estate and picking him up.

When you finally arrived home, you two were all over each other immediately. They had the most passionate session of sex you've ever had together on the living room couch because neither of you could make it to the bedroom.

''F-fuck, still so tight for me, Baby,'' you whisper in Ransom's ear as you push in after working him open for the most significant part of an hour, drinking in every moan slipping past his lips.

''Such a perfect boy for Daddy, gonna let Daddy use your hole like the fucktoy you are, huh?'' you say with a mischievous grin on his face, and all Ransom can do is nod in agreement while you slowly push in further, groaning at the feeling of him clenching down on you as you stroke his cock.

When you're fully in, you slowly start moving in and out, making Ransom arch his back off the couch and into you, only wanting to be close to you right now.

''D-Daddy!'' he screams out as you continuously thrust against his prostate, and you stroke him through his orgasm, his cum spurting out onto his stomach and chest before you lick it up and work your tongue into his mouth so he can taste himself in your mouth.

''Gonna cum for you, Baby. Fuck, take my cum!'' you groan as you chase your high, and you shoot every last drop deep into Ransom before collapsing on top of him, whispering sweet words to him as you both come down.

Afterward, you take a relaxing bath together, exchanging sweet words and lots of 'I love you ' kisses. Finally, it feels perfect, like you live the life you've always dreamt of.

That night, you fall asleep in your husband's arms, feeling like it's meant to be. Tonight is the first night of the rest of your lives together.

[noyasaur]

hi! Can you talk a bit about you jjba dr? (If youre comfy ofc!) ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

an introduction to my jjba dr! ✩₊˚.⋆

cw: spoilers for jojo's bizaare adventure!

-> hihi! and yes omg ofcc!! i haven't shifted to my jjba dr yet but i would LOVEE to just ramble all about it if you don't mind 😌 gonna make it all aesthetic and cute too cuz hell yea😍

-> all images used (except the dividers) are from pinterest and full credit goes to the authors of these images :)

★ . about my jjba desired reality!

right now, i only have one jjba desired reality which the whole thing about is me going on all the adventures from part three to five!

i think in the future i want to have a few more desired realities like one experiencing part two and part six and maybe even more of the parts if i end up finishing the other mangas! i also want to have a jjba dr set in modern times and also a jjba-based reality with kpop idols!

the timeline: in my main jjba reality, i've changed the timeline of some things so i can experience all the adventures in the different parts with the jojo boys in succession one after the other.

for example, when i first shift to this reality, i start with going on the adventures of part three with jotaro and the other stardust crusaders. the events of part four happen a year after the events of the stardust crusaders adventures when me, and jotaro are ordered to go to morioh by the speedwagon foundation to investigate well, jotaro's 'cousin'😭

in this reality, there was no affair 😙 joseph has a daughter and a son: holly and hugo. hugo is holly's younger brother and when he graduates high school, he goes off to japan for university. however, he meets tomoko there and they become a couple. long story short, he gets her pregnant and he never told any of his family, in fear of what they might say about him having a child so young. so that's how there is no affair that makes everyone go crazy, how josuke exists and how i can experience adventures when i'm not an old lady and i don't have to wait like twenty years between each adventure! (lmao)

obviously i can't live without kakyoin being dead and everyone else, so they live in this version 🤗 also, i made dio sort of less? evil? he doesn't actually commit any crimes against other humans (except blood-sucking ew but he doesn't kill anyone and just keeps people hostage as slaves and maids while he does his evil bidding eek) but is just hellbent on 'destroying' the joestar bloodline.

thinking about adding some other people into this reality too? for example, i was really contemplating adding sunghoon into this reality and making him one of dio's sons or something but during part three, he turns on his father and helps us defeat him 😜 this is a possible addition but i'm not sure if i'll go through with this or not!

i also have some generational pact with the brandos (i didn't do it, my grandpa did smh), though i fight with the joestars. long story short, my grandpas was in love with dio and made a pact that he would swear to protect the brando bloodline (my grandpa = speedwagon but dio's version) /hj might explain this later but im still in the works with figuring out how it's going to work and the backstory behind it!

★ . about me!

background: i was born in australia on the (??\??\???? - not sure on the dates and whether i want it to be set in the 80's or the 00's). i was born with a faint, butterfly-shaped marking on my back. none of my parents knew what it meant but as i grew older, it continued to grow darker, and darker. self-conscious of the odd mark etched into my back, i bandaged it up to hide it. i lived a pretty peaceful childhood. however, the after i turned thirteen years of age, very strange occurrences kept happening to me.

there were some instances where things would become heavier or lighter, or where my parents felt as if they were moving in slow-motion or faster than usual. i would get weird dreams, some of the past, and some of the very, far future.

little did i know, this was all the work of my stand manifesting.

not knowing what was happening, i was shipped off to japan to live with my uncle, in tokyo in hopes that my uncle would be able to fix whatever was going on with me. you see, my uncle is a very spiritual man. while he works as an astronomer and a psychologist, he is very knowledgeable in the likes of tarot cards, magic, and otherworldly forces (etc). he did everything he could and that was in his power to try and figure out what was happening to me, since that was his forte and all.

and thus, after years of dealing with these strange incidents, at the age of 15, my stand manifested before me. i was crossing the street, on the way back to my uncle's apartment from visiting a convenience store. however, i didn't notice a car zooming towards me until it was too late. i shut my eyes, assuming it was all over. this was my fate: i was going to die a horrible and painful death. and there was nothing i could to about it.

i shut my eyes, bracing myself for the impact and my inevitable doom.

i waited.

and waited.

and yet, i felt nothing.

the impact never came. the excruciating pain and blast i expected to feel, never hit my body.

i was alive. and completely unscathed. but. . . how?

i wearily opened my eyes and to me confusion and horror, i saw her. i saw a strikingly beautiful but eerie human-like creature floating in front of me. it had it's arms extended out toward the car, which was now moving at an impeccably slow snail's pace.

after standing there in shock for a few seconds, i shook my head and scurried away.

around a few times after this incident, the frequency at which i had those 'weird' dreams dramatically increased. they turned from being a fortnightly, even monthly occurrence, to having those dreams many nights in a row, back to back.

oddly enough, with every dream i was having, i couldn't help but feel they were starting to feel a lot less like dreams but a lot more like visions.

after two weeks of more odd visions and happenings, i finally told my uncle. he was deeply puzzled as he tried to make sense of what was happening to me. and after a few minutes of pondering, something washed over his face.

was it relief? or more confusion?

did he finally work out what was happening to me?

but in the end, all he told me what that if i were to ever run into a man with the name 'Joseph Joestar' he made me promise i were to stick with him if i ever met him.

i asked him who he was, and all he replied with was: "Joseph? oh why, he's just a very good old friend of mine."

and so, i continue my life as usual, trying to deal and overpower these strange incidents and even became familiar with my beautiful and endearing new creature. luckily for me, i was enrolled in an online school so any incidents i would have would hardly leave a scratch on my grades and records.

although, this completely changed in the last year of my high school.

you see, my uncle wanted me to have a 'fun' and 'memorable' high school experience, especially considering it was my last year. and so, he enrolled me into an actual high school, which would change the course of my fate forever.

and what a 'fun' and memorable year it was. . .

(i am so sorry if this is so corny omg this feels so corny sdsdjs)

★ . my stand!

my stand name: Ancient Dreams (In a Modern Land)

statistics: power: B Rank speed: A Rank range: B Rank durability: A rank precision: B Rank potential: A Rank

abilities: weight drop! (weight change): the ability to change the weight of anything. can make objects or people light, or make objects or people heavier. the stand user cannot use this ability on themselves. the ability can be activated by shooting small orbs or energy at the opposing object or person, where they will have a butterfly emblem on them, shaded corresponding to a highlighted moon phase on my stand, which corresponds to the 'levels' of weight taken off the person. flash! (speed manipulation): the ability to change the speed of any object or person. however, this can only be done when the stand makes contact with the object of person. dream telepathy/communication/travelling: has the ability to communicate with others during their dreams, or enter one's dream through a meditative trance, with the help of their stand. the stand user can appear in one's dreams and communicate with the person, and also manipulate their dreams. however, the stand user cannot physically harm their target's through their dreams. rather, it is a soothing and positive technique that puts the target in a state of comfort. dream energy: the stand has the ability to shoot out energy orbs as a way of fighting. the orbs are made of 'dream energy' and can easily damage and slice through objects, depending on the manipulation of the orb. the orbs can be thrown in their pure form, or even me manipulated into whatever the stand user desires. for example, i could turn dream orb into a 'dream sword,' made from the cosmic energy of dreams and fantasy.

appearance: has a slim and feminine appearance. it's body is a gradient and mix of light baby blue, lilac purple and cotton candy pink, with the phases of the moon imprinted on it's chest. it wears a majestic headpiece of a butterfly on it's head, which is coloured a shimmering mix of pastel gold, purple and pink. it's eyes are a deep blur colour, and has transparent blue 'butterfly' wings.

🪐 saturn's note:

-> um this was a little more than just 'talking a bit about it' but i hope you found this interesting and enjoyed! kinda scared to post this because i've never really talked about my drs like this so it's new to me but also fun 😍 i might update this here and there and i def swill reblog if i do or just make another post for anything else you're interested in!

-> oh and when i shift there? hell yeah am i going to be writing and sharing my experiences omg 😩

[helloalycia]

watching TV [one] // kate bishop

summary: everything seems like it's going perfectly in your life – your girlfriend, your best friend, your job – until it's not. After your girlfriend breaks up with you so suddenly, you're left trying to understand what the problem was, but Kate is there to make it all better.

warning/s: mention of a breakup, mild violence and injury.

author’s note: i’ve literally had this in my drafts for so long and finally managed to finish it. It’s based off/inspired by the song ‘Watching TV’ by Sara Kays – feel free to listen to it whilst you read (I’ve popped the song below). Hope you enjoy!

two / three / masterlist / wattpad

"Are you really just going to sit here and keep buying coffee, Kate?" I ask my very determined best friend with amusement.

"Well, I got told off last time for staying all day and not buying more than one drink, so yeah," she replies like it's obvious. "And I don't want you to get fired because of it, so duh. I'd buy the whole menu if it meant we could hang out, Y/N."

I roll my eyes, feeling my smile widen at how cute she could be sometimes. I worked in a coffee shop and, since graduating, I'd been increasing my hours to pay rent which meant I was spending less time with Kate than usual. So, naturally, her solution was to hang out with me at work.

"You're cute, I'll give you that," I say, shooting her an appreciative look, before setting her third cup of coffee down before her. "Please don't have a caffeine overdose for my sake though."

She grabs my hand and puts it on her chest. "You feel that? It's a little too late."

I laugh when I feel the faint thrumming of her heart in her chest, faster than it should be. "Wow. I'm definitely cutting you off now."

"The things we do for love." She flashes me a grin and I shake my head with dismay.

Before I can think to say anything else, I glance behind her and my smile widens when I spot my girlfriend entering through the front door. She looks around, mirroring my smile when she spots me, too.

"Hannah, what are you doing here?" I ask with surprise.

She leans forward to kiss my cheek, making me grow warm at the contact. "I was running some errands and thought I'd stop by. Also just wanted to double check we were still on for tonight."

"Of course we are. I'm looking forward to it. Already got the snacks in and the films ready to go," I answer excitedly, meeting her brown eyes.

We'd planned for her to stay over at mine tonight and have a movie night just because, and to say I was looking forward to it was an understatement.

"Kate, hey, how are you?" Hannah asks politely, noticing her presence before us.

Kate's smile fades slightly and I can tell she's trying to remain civil. "Hey, Hannah... I'm good. And you?"

Hannah gives her a smile. "Doing great..."

It gets awkwardly quiet and I hate that it has to be like this. Hannah and I have been dating for about a year now, but her and Kate have never really gotten along. Or rather, there's just an awkwardness between them that never disappeared with time like I wanted. They both meant a lot to me and so made the effort with one another for my sake, but it's clear they wouldn't choose to converse if they could. I've tried talking to Kate about it, but she claims everything is fine. Same with Hannah. So, I just got used to it.

"Right, well I should get back to work," I break the silence with a small smile, looking between them. "Hannah, c'mon, I'll take your order. And Kate." I give her a warning look. "Last coffee. I mean it."

Her sincerity returns as she challenges my stare. "We'll see."

I scoff gently, leaving her to it as I return to my position at the till. Kate never listens, what can I say? But I won't lie – I love having her around.

As planned, Hannah stays over that same evening, watching films with me and eating way too much junk food to be considered healthy. But it's fun and I have never felt more relaxed, not unless I'm by myself or with Kate.

She stays overnight, sharing bed with me and cuddling to no ends, before I make us both a hearty breakfast and we reside on the couch to watch some midday TV together. Maybe the normalcy of it all is what throws me off – bad things shouldn't happen when everything feels normal. That's the whole point of something being normal, it's not bad. And yet...

"Y/N, I need to tell you something."

I hum in response, not really paying attention as I watch the telly. "Go for it."

Hannah hesitates. "I'm serious."

I furrow my brows slightly, glancing over at her at the change of her voice. "What is it?" When I notice the guilt in her expression, I straighten up and mute the TV, giving her all of my attention. Clearly something is bothering her. "Hey, Hannah, what is it? What's wrong?"

When I grab her hand, hoping to provide some comfort for whatever is bothering her, she pulls hers away.

"I'm breaking up with you."

I blink, taken aback by her bluntness. "You're– you– what?"

It doesn't seem plausible, what she said. Is this a stupid joke? Because it's not funny.

She chews on the inside of her cheek, eyes avoiding mine, and the longer she's quiet, the more my fear builds up that she's being serious.

"I didn't know how else to say it," she says quietly. "But I'm breaking up with you."

It's as if her words aren't quite sinking in because they just don't make sense. Breaking up? We're literally watching TV – how can she be breaking up with me?

"I don't understand," I say slowly, before attempting to reach over for her hand. A strike of hurt passes through me when she yanks her hand away further. "I need you to explain. To talk to me. I'm– what?"

She shakes her head slowly, standing up. I follow her with my eyes, trying to hide the way my breathing is becoming quicker, panicked, worried.

"I can't do this anymore," she says awkwardly, running a hand through her hair. "That's all."

Standing up, I try to step closer to her, unable to acknowledge the truth of the matter which is that she doesn't want to be near me. But how? Why? We were cuddling last night and now she suddenly can't stand me? What?

"Hannah, please give me more than that," I say with a teary smile, confused. "How can you suddenly want to break up? What's going on?"

She clenches her jaw, finally risking a glance my way, and it's like I'm staring at a completely different person. Her eyes are void of love or adoration or anything I feel for her. Has it been like that for a while? Have I never noticed?

"I'm sorry, Y/N," she says, and she sounds anything but, making my heart ache. "I should go."

There are no words to describe the utter disbelief I feel at watching grab her shoes, pulling them onto her feet. She's leaving? That's it? What?

"Wait a minute, Hannah," I say quickly, snapping back into action and following after her. "You're breaking up with me? Just like that? How can you–? I don't understand–"

"I don't love you anymore!" she snaps, making me jump. She swallows hard, exhaling and looking my way with guilty eyes. "I've been trying to tell you for a while now. It just never felt like the right time."

My throat closes up as she stares at me with pity. Shameful warmth creeps onto my cheeks. She doesn't love me anymore?

"That's all," she finishes softly, like it's not a big deal, like my heart isn't shattering at every word she speaks.

"You don't... why would... you..." I swallow thickly, trying to stop my voice from shaking so much. It doesn't help that she's staring at me with pitiful eyes. "What did I do?"

She sighs, rubbing her forehead with her forefinger and thumb. "Nothing. I just... I don't love you anymore."

My vision blurs with tears as I look to the floor, trying to figure out what that means. How can she not love me anymore? We've been fine. Nothing has gotten between us, we literally just hung out all evening. I'm still in love with her – she's my girlfriend. How can she decide she wants to leave all of a sudden?

"I'm sorry," she says once more, but it's mere background noise to my jumbled thoughts. Her hand ghosts my wrist, an apologetic squeeze, before I hear her leaving my apartment.

So, that's it? She leaves? And I'm alone? No explanation, no reason, just that she isn't in love with me anymore?

What?

Before the initial hurt can take over, I'm still very much confused. I try to call her, needing more of an explanation then a mere 'I don't love you anymore'. We've been together for a year – how can she just want to throw that all away? Doesn't she owe me more than a blunt breakup?

When she ignores my calls and texts, merely sending a 'l have nothing more to say, Y/N' text with finality, I realise she's dead serious. This isn't an elaborate prank, nor did she care enough to give me more than what she did. It's over. And I'm just supposed to accept that.

I've had breakups before. One where I've been the dumper, and another where I've been the dumped. Neither have hurt as much as this. I expected those, there were signs there. Lack of communication, the feeling like we were drifting apart, the bickering... it was obvious when my previous relationships were coming to an end. But this one came out of nowhere. I had no chance to prepare, to tell myself to stop loving her back.

I shouldn't spend my time wondering why, but it's all that's on my mind. If I'm not crying in my room, missing someone who doesn't want me anymore, then I'm wondering: why? What was the reason? She doesn't love me anymore, but there has to be a reason why.

Something about me isn't good enough for her. Something about me is so undesirable that she stopped loving me. What? Was it that time I showed up late to dinner and left her waiting fifteen minutes? Was it that time I disagreed with the way she spoke to her mum and we argued briefly about it afterwards?

It's so easy to reflect on every disagreement, every minor argument, every time I could have pissed her off... one of those times must have been it for her. The reason she called it quits.

What is it?

As if getting broken up with isn't embarrassing enough, it had to be by the girl my best friend never approved of. Such a cliché, right? That should have been an instant red flag, the girlfriend not being approved by the best friend. And yet I still went for it.

The last thing I want is for Kate to find out, for her to think that she was right. She'd never say it, but just her thinking it would be enough to make me feel even shittier. She'll have to find out eventually, but for now, it's better to keep to myself. Besides, I'm definitely not in the mood to face anybody at the moment, so I try to stick to myself.

Whenever she asks to hang out, I give her some lame excuse why I can't. Half the time it's because I'm actually working, but she'd never know the difference. If I'm not doing that, I spend my time applying for better jobs that actually utilise my degree whilst questioning every aspect of my relationship. How hadn't I seen it coming? Hannah had just woken up one day, looked at me and decided she couldn't love me anymore.

Yeah, it's safe to say I've never felt worse.

Of course, soaking in self-pity doesn't go down so easily when your best friend is as persistent as she is.

I don't know why I expect anything less from Kate, who is the definition of a hyperactive puppy, but I'm still surprised when she visits me at work one afternoon.

"Kate? What are you–? What are you doing here?"

She quirks a brow as she shoots me an amused smile. "Don't act too surprised."

I clear my throat, straightening up. "Sorry, I– sorry, just, what's up? How did you know I was working?"

"We'll, you've only been saying you're busy with work every time I want to hang out with you, so I thought I'd stop by," she says dramatically and with an easygoing smile. "That okay?"

I nod, looking down at the till. "Yeah, of course. Sorry."

She pauses, so I look up to see her humour is gone, replaced with concern. "Hey, are you okay? You seem preoccupied."

I force a smile, not wanting to get into this now and definitely not ready to tell her about the breakup when it's still so fresh. "Yeah, I'm fine, don't worry. Just tired from all the shifts, sorry."

She dips her head to find my eyes, her blue ones flickering between mine worriedly. With a low voice, she says, "What's with all the extra shifts? Do you need money? Because you know I'll always help you, Y/N."

I shake my head, widening my smile and hoping it looks genuine. "Kate, I'm fine, don't worry. Now, come on. What can I get you?"

She chews on her lip, no doubt about to retort, but thankfully she decides not to and instead orders her drink. After moving to go get it ready, I sigh inwardly, knowing I need to make more effort with her. She'll definitely suspect something if I keep avoiding her.

It's hard to focus on applying for jobs when you're definitely not in the mood to, but I still force myself to at least dedicate a few hours a day to searching and starting some applications. After all, I don't want to be working at a coffee shop forever.

I'm at home doing just that when Kate messages me, asking if I'm at home. After telling her I am, she invites herself over and I can't exactly stop her, even though I'd rather just be alone, so I tell her okay and throw on a more presentable outfit (AKA putting on pants).

When there's a knock at the door, I roll off my bed and answer it, unable to stop the small smile appearing on my face at the sight of Kate. Even though I haven't been myself lately, she always manages to make everything a little better without even realising.

"Hey," I say, stepping to the side to let her in. "How you doing?"

I notice she's wearing her Avengers sweatshirt and joggers which is just a black outfit with the Avengers logo printed on the corner.

"You been at the Compound?" I ask, closing the door after she steps in.

"Hey, yeah," she starts, sounding a little distracted.

"Oh, cool." I lead her to the couch as I ask, "So, how was training or whatever it is that Avengers do?"

It's supposed to be lighthearted but she doesn't fall into it like she usually does, leaving me curious.

"What?" I ask when she begins to frown at me.

She hesitates, eyes flickering to the spot behind me briefly, before saying, "I bumped into Hannah on the way back to my place before."

And as if somebody flicks a switch, any comfort I feel is immediately gone at the mention of my ex's name. Judging by Kate's face, she knows. And I don't know what's worse – the look she's giving me or the possible thoughts running through her head about me.

"Y/N...," she says gently, stepping forward. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I shrug indifferently, avoiding her sympathetic stare. "It didn't come up."

Kate raises her brows with slight disbelief. "Y/N."

I put my hands behind my back nonchalantly, trying to hide my fidgeting. "What did she say?" I ask.

She bites her lip, eyes studying me in a concerned way but one that only leaves me embarrassed.

"I was saying hello to her to be polite," she answers reluctantly. "And then I asked about you, if you were okay because you've been distracted lately and I thought she might know more than I do. But then she got all awkward and said she wouldn't know. So, obviously, I said what? And she–" She frowns. "She said she broke up with you like three weeks ago."

I close my eyes, wincing with embarrassment. She said that? If there was any way I wanted Kate to find out, this was the last.

"Y/N, what the hell?" Kate says, making me open my eyes to see her confusion. "What happened?"

I push my hair from my eyes and try to remain calm, but the feelings are bubbling away on the surface again and I begin to feel uncomfortable. "It's not a big deal. It was just a breakup. I should have known it wouldn't work out."

Should I have?

"What was the reason?" she asks carefully, and I hate that I can't answer that because I don't know. That's what hurts the most.

How do I explain to Kate that something about me wasn't enough for Hannah to love so she left me instead?

"Please can we just forget about it?" I plead quietly, risking a glance in Kate's direction. "I know this is the part where you say 'I told you so', but I'm–"

"Hey, no, stop it," she cuts me off, resting her hand on my shoulder and dipping her head to meet my gaze. "That's not even a thought of mine right now. I'm just worried about you... how are you?"

I flash her a forced smile, nodding. "I'm fine, Kate, see?"

It's a terrible attempt to convince her, but it's easier than telling her exactly how I'm feeling. I hope she doesn't push it, but she does one better and pulls me in for a hug. I didn't realise how much I needed it until she's wrapped her arms around me, squeezing me tight and providing a warmth I so dearly missed. I relax at the feeling, tucking my head into her shoulder and revelling in her care.

"Seriously, what happened?" she asks softly.

I don't let go of her, not yet. But she deserves an answer. And maybe I'm sick of bottling it all up.

"I don't know," I admit quietly, voice breaking embarrassingly enough.

She's patient, letting me hold her for a moment longer as I gather the courage to face her. It's not about her – Kate and I are close enough for me to tell her my deepest, darkest secrets. It's more about how embarrassing it is to be in this situation in the first place.

"She just broke up with me," I finally speak once I pull away from Kate's embrace. Her blue eyes watch me, hanging onto my every word, and it feels good to say it aloud even though my heart still breaks reliving it. "There wasn't any warning. And when I asked her why, she said– she said she didn't love me anymore. Just like that."

Okay, so saying it aloud doesn't feel good. I take it back.

"Sorry," I say when I realise tears are rolling down my face and my nose is all stuffy. Backing up, I look away and wipe my face with my sleeves. "I don't mean to be all gross. It's embarrassing, I know–"

"No it's not," she says quickly, shaking her head and watching me with a softened stare. "Is that why you didn't tell me? Because you were embarrassed?"

I exhale deeply, not knowing what to say because, funnily enough, I'm still embarrassed.

"Y/N," she urges, grabbing my hand, but I pull back gently, ashamed of the pity.

"Yes, that's why I didn't tell you," I tell her with a frown, meeting her gaze through blurred vision. "How isn't it completely and utterly humiliating, Kate? She broke up with me because she suddenly woke up one day, looked at me and thought 'nope, don't love her!' Something about me is unloveable, clearly. How isn't that embarrassing?"

Kate steps forward, grabbing my hand and squeezing it before I can let go. "Are you insane, Y/N? That's not true at all, not one bit!"

I scoff quietly, looking away from her. She only tugs me closer by my hand, forcing me to look at her.

"Who the hell in their right mind would fall out of love with you?!" she exclaims, throwing a hand up in the air. "There's clearly something wrong with her! You're amazing!"

I roll my eyes, finding it difficult to believe her. Besides, she's biased. As a best friend, she's not exactly going to put me down, is she?

"This isn't an 'I told you so' moment," she says adamantly, before pulling me into another hug, holding me so tight that I'm surprised she cares this much at all. "I'm here for you. I care about you and I wish you'd told me so you didn't have to go through it alone... please, don't push me away."

It's impossible not to love her right now, not when she's reminding me exactly how lucky I am to have her in my life.

"Thanks," I mutter into her shoulder. "I just... I don't want to talk about it."

I feel her nod in response before she pulls away and holds me at arm's length. I can't read her expression, surprisingly enough, but then she offers me a comforting smile and I almost regret not telling her in the first place.

That's Kate Bishop for you.

Since Kate discovered the truth, it's easier to just be me... the distant, moody, sulking version that is. I don't expect to feel better straight away, but it sucks being sad and I hate that I can't do much about it. I don't want it to consume me though, so I try not to distance myself from the people in my life, people like Kate. I try to keep my promise of letting her in and not pushing her away, but it's too easy to sulk.

"Did you see that, Y/N?! Clint taught me that one!"

I look up when I realise Kate is talking to me, jumping up and down with excitement, bow and arrow in hand. She invited me to hang out with her at the Avengers Compound whilst she gets some archery training in. She knows how much I love messing around with her whenever she invites me, but today I'm just not feeling it and I may or may not have been zoning out a little.

"I... sorry, Kate, I must have missed it," I admit with an apologetic smile. "Bet it was great though."

Her smile fades as she tilts her head, studying me. I know what she's thinking and look away, deciding that maybe I should leave if I'm just bringing the mood down. But then she skips over to me lightheartedly, taking a seat beside me.

"Hey," she says softly, tapping my knee with her forefinger.

I look over at her and she's already smiling my way, eyes looking up at me as she's leaned down, trying to catch my attention. Admittedly, my lips curl upwards.

"I want to take you to the fair that's happening in Central Park," she continues, straightening up in her seat, never looking away from me.

I exhale sharply, trying not to laugh. "I don't think I'd be very good company."

She lifts a brow hopefully. "Please?"

As much as I don't want to attend a fair, Kate's cute pout is very convincing, and I find myself sighing quietly, giving in with a nod. Her smile widens shamelessly before she pulls me in for a hug.

"Gross, Kate, c'mon," I whine petulantly, attempting to shove her away because she's all sweaty from training.

She only laughs and hugs me even tighter, winning against my useless attempts to fight her. I roll my eyes, pouting, but I'd be lying if said I didn't love it.

A few nights later is when the fair takes place and I realise what I've agreed to. The only reason I bother getting ready and not completely bailing is Kate's texts all day telling me how excited she is. For her sake, I try my best to push away my grumpiness as of late so we can actually have a good time.

I'm waiting for her outside my apartment building so we can go together when I spot her approaching.

"Somebody took their time," I joke when I see her.

"My bad," she chuckles nervously, stopping before me, and my eyes widen when I spot the cuts sprinkled over her face, covered by little bandages.

I open my mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. Raising my hand instinctively, I have to stop myself from touching her cuts, fingers hovering over them.

"For God's sake, Kate, can't you stay out of trouble ever?" I say with annoyance, though the worry I'm trying to disguise is still very much present.

"Nope...?" she says when I lower my hand, grinning sheepishly.

I settle with an eye roll, scoffing quietly. She's always been careless like this, gaining bruise after cut, even before she joined the Avengers. It always worried me, now more so than ever, but she's also unsurprisingly good at staying alive so I can't really say anything. Plus, I'm not too sure she'd listen to me if I tried to stop her from being stupid anyway.

"Come on, let's go!" she changes the subject, tugging at my hand. "I've already got my heart set on a corn dog."

"Yeah, yeah..."

When we reach Central Park, the fair is in full swing, bustling with people, vendors, rides and music playing loudly. It's the most perfect sight, instantly brightening my mood, to my surprise. Kate immediately drags me to the first thing she sees – a corn dog stand – before taking charge the whole evening. We play countless fairground games, hop on a few definitely unsafe rides, hit each other in the bumper cars and eat way too much junk food. I don't think I've enjoyed myself this much since the breakup.

By the time I'm pretty sure we've done everything the fair has to offer, twice over, we find ourselves sat on a bench to get off our feet. Kate is eating from a bag of popcorn whilst I take another look at our winnings from the night – a stuffed toy, some key rings, snacks... pointless stuff, but I can't love it any more than I do.

"You look happy," Kate says, and it takes me a moment to tear my attention away from one of the keyrings I'm studying. She's smiling at me, blue eyes twinkling with the neon lights.

"I am," I say, shrugging.

She purses her lips, looking down. "I missed seeing it."

I look away, unsure what to say but imagining what it must be like for her lately. I haven't exactly been the greatest company, but she's still stuck by me.

"It's not true, y'know," she adds carefully.

"What?"

A pause, and then: "You're not unloveable. I wouldn't be here if you were."

At the mention of my words to her once she'd discovered the truth – my fear, deep down – I close my eyes and sigh quietly. A retort is at the tip of my tongue because no matter how convinced she sounds, I know it's not entirely true. Why else would Hannah simply fall out of love with me? Get bored of me so easily?

But before I can say anything, Kate's hand slips into mine, making me open my eyes with surprise. She takes my other hand, too, forcing me to face her slightly as she watches me with a seriousness she rarely showed.

"It hurts now, but it will get better," she says with complete and utter sincerity, her eyes boring through mine. "What Hannah did was horrible. The way she went about it..." She pauses, looking up with a suppressed scowl. "God, if I could see her again just to give her a taste of her own medicine." Shaking the thought away, she looks to me once more. "But that's besides the point. Don't let it ruin you, Y/N. You're the best. And you deserve the world and every good thing in it, and you'll get it someday. For now... well," she cracks a smile, jokingly, "you'll just have to settle with me.

A small smile tugs at my lips, heart warming at her words.

"You're the last thing from unloveable," she adds, giving me a knowing look.

I'm not sure if I believe her words, but I believe that she believes it, and that's enough for me for now.

"Thank you, Kate," I finally speak, surprised at way my voice breaks. Her words have more of an effect on me than I thought. Embarrassed but smiling nonetheless, I avoid her eyes and pull her in for a hug. "I love you, you know that?"

She snickers, returning my hug. "I know, Y/N. I think you know I love you, too."

I sigh contently, tightening my hold when she tries to pull away. She chuckles quietly, staying put, and I'm grateful because I don't want to let go just yet. She's been here for me when I haven't been myself and I've never felt more gratitude for her than I have right now. What I have here with Kate, this friendship... it's definitely unconditional. It always has been.

[wildissylupus]

Why is Cole so revered in the lore/voice lines?

Ok, I've seen this question be brought up in both a serious and joking manner and I completely understand it because unlike a lot of other characters whose skills are shown heavily either in actual gameplay or pre-game voice lines, Cassidy's full assortment of skills actively can't be explained or shown further then the set skills he's allowed to use in game.

Basically if you don't really look into his lore you wouldn't really grasp why he was chosen to be in Blackwatch in the first place if his only perceived "skills and talents" are good aim, rolling around and a grenade.

So let me explain why Cole Cassidy is so skilled that not only Overwatch want him, but Talon too.

1) His Resume

The first thing in Cassidy's resume is helping found the Deadlock gang when he was fifteen and even before that he was actively Ashe's right-hand man, making him second in command in Deadlock as well.

The next thing he was apart of was Blackwatch, I'll get into why he was hired into Blackwatch later. Cassidy was brought into Blackwatch by Gabriel Reyes, to which (at least by the time of the Venice incident) Cole proceeded to become at least one of the people Gabriel relied on and trusted most and at most, second-in-command in Blackwatch. (Again I'll get into that later)

Now this leads off of the previous point and that is the fact that Cassidy was one of the only Blackwatch member other then Genji to be brought into Overwatch;

Here he is in an Overwatch graduation photo. He is presumably graduating with Tracer, Winston and Genji.

Now let's get into more resent years of him being a Vigilante/Bounty Hunter. Cassidy has been recorded to basically be continuing the work he did with Overwatch but more on his own terms, as seen in this;

this;

And this;

He hasn't really "laid low" in his time away from Overwatch, he continued from where he left off but now he works relatively alone and on his own terms.

And now we can get into the final item on his resume; recruiting and possibly lead his own Overwatch team.

Throughout the New Blood comics it plays with the idea of Cassidy taking the role as "leader" instead of focusing on orders given to him by someone else, not only that but considering what little we've seen on the PvE Story Mode Campaign, Cassidy is mostly fully animated and framed with Sojourn and Winston. Two people who are heavily expected to be taking on leader roles during story mode. (I will expand more about this in a later post)

So that is everything we know that is in Cassidy's resume, now let's get into the next topic;

2) His talents and skills

Let's start off with what he can do in game;

Peacekeeper - Accurate, powerful revolver

Peacekeeper - Wildly fire remaining rounds.

Combat Roll - Roll in the direction your moving and reload

Magnetic Grenades - Throw a short-range grenade that homes in on nearby enemies and deals additional damage if it sticks to them.

Deadeye - Focus. Mark. Draw. Cassidy takes a few precious moments to aim; when he’s ready to fire, he shoots every enemy in his line of sight. The weaker his targets are, the faster he’ll line up a killshot.

(Sources; Wiki, Character Bio)

Now most of these abilities seem to be of the course for a character of his capabilities, but I'm only going to be talking about one; Deadeye.

From what we know in lore Deadeye is most likely what Cassidy is like at peak performance, which on it's own at a lore standpoint is pretty impressive. At a lore standpoint Cassidy is perfectly capable of essentially sniping six people using an impractical gun for sniping.

Yes this is him at peak performance but that is only in game, in lore he is capable of doing that at any time. Think about that for a second. He can basically use his Ultimate at any time.

Ok now, let's get into all the skills/talents he has that are implied by the lore itself;

Having an aim that is on par with Ana Amari with a gun that is generally not used for long range attacks

Being Ana's Amari and Gabriel Reyes's protégé

Him being trained by both Ana and Gabe means he's most likely skilled in more weapons then just a peacekeeper revolver (i.e. sniper rifles and shotguns at the very least)

Being skilled enough at age 17 to be not only considered for Blackwatch but to be put into a high security prison

Being able to survive multiple botched Black-ops missions (Brigitte: My dad says a lot of your missions were disasters.)

Most likely having a hand in writing the Blackwatch playbook.

(The way it emphasises "my" gives me the impression he had a hand in writing it)

Was able to take out a talon with out any casualties, on his own and in an enclosed, moving area. Not to mention several of those talon agents were taken out in the dark. (see Train Hopper)

Oh and let's not forget that he was actively of the run with a 60 million bounty on his head, meaning he was not only being hunted down by police, but other bounty hunters too.

There is also his history as a bodyguard (he was assigned to protect Mina Liao a lot), leading Blackwatch missions (he was in Blackwatch/Overwatch from 17 - 30/31 he most definitely ran a few missions), and just his strong ass loyalty (backstory retconned to he left after the Swiss explosion to emphasise this)

I probably missed some things but these are all the skills he has that are implied by lore. Now we can finally get to the actual question;

3) Why is Cole Cassidy so revered?

The reason Cassidy is so revered is because of the amount of skills he has, his pension for being able to learn new skills and his ability to be a massive threat to those he's fighting against even if he's on his own.

And do you want to know the final nail in the coffin?

The only enhancement he has is is prosthetic to which as far as we know lore wise, is a regular prosthetic.

Other than that Cassidy is, on the surface at least, some regular guy who dresses up as a cowboy.

So in conclusion, Cole Cassidy is more of a threat and an asset then people give him credit for. However this actually isn't of any fault of their own, as much as I've harped on in this post and others on how competent Cassidy is, there is one thing that will still remain true.

And that is Cole Cassidy is a dumbass, a heavily skilled and competent one, but a dumbass none the less.

Now this leads to one final question...

Why does Talon/Doomfist want Cassidy on their side?

[jsprnt]

Healing Hearts PT.2 | Virgil van Dijk

Would a fresh start bring you more than just a new job?

WC: 2.892

Summary: Y/N L/N is a very skilled and praised physiotherapist. A certain event pushing her for a fresh start, as a physiotherapist for Liverpool FC. One question always being in the back of her mind: Will she be able to let go of her past and allow herself to experience new things?

I am awoken by the blaring sound of my alarm. Why do I always have to wake up when my bed gets so comfy? I groan, fighting the urge to snooze my alarm, checking the time while at it. It's six now, two hours to make this face look like it has seen more than four hours of sleep.

I check my messages before washing up. Walking out to the bathroom to put on my outfit. Some 90's style jeans and a body hugging cropped shirt. Nothing too much, I'll have to wear my scrubs anyway. I make my bed and do some breathing exercises to calm my nerves, meeting new people was still a big challenge for me. I finish eating breakfast and turn on the coffee machine for a nice frothy cup of coffee. Admiring the view behind my window as I sip the last bit of my coffee. The city is not entirely up yet, people still enjoying their last minutes of sleep before going to work or school.

Walking back to my room for the best part of my morning, doing my make up! I apply my base carefully. First day means first impressions, I can't go overboard, not yet. I curl my long lashes, coating them with mascara. Lining my lips with brown liner, some lip balm on top for a subtle look. I take out my jewelry box, grabbing my usual gold necklace. It was custom made, adorning my name, a graduation gift from my mom. I look into the mirror, humming a song in satisfaction as I do my hair. I grab my bag, stuffing it with things I might need throughout the day. Finally, putting on my Nike dunks and leaving my house.

I walk downstairs to my car. Thankfully my dad had arranged for it to be imported from Spain a couple weeks ago, when I accepted this job. My dad had a thing for paying for my things, maybe it  was to make up for our strained relationship or something. Either way, I wasn't going to refuse his help, it benefited us both anyways. He'd feel like a present father, and I'd feel like he cared.

I jump into my car, the dashboard lighting up. I run my hands around the steering wheel for some comfort before I hit the road. The leather soft as I trace the Mercedes logo, I loved this baby. My G-class never failed to make me feel like the bad bitch I am. I told you working hard and spending hard had its perks. I turn on the navigation system, hoping it would take me straight to the training grounds without any issues.

I turn on some music, trying to drown out my nerves and thoughts. It was never too early for some Drake. I try to pay special attention to my surroundings, since the more I memorize, the faster I can get used to this route. My navigation system pings as it tells me I've arrived. I scan my surroundings, being greeted by a security post. I drive up to it, turning my music off and rolling my window down.

"Good morning, I'm here for the new physiotherapist job." I flash the security guard a smile, he is an older man, his hair graying slightly. I might as well get friendly since I'll be here almost everyday from today onwards. "Morning to you as well. Could you some show me some sort of identification, please?." I can't help but stare at the man, his scoucer accent making it hard for me to understand right away, I should get used to it quickly. I nod quickly pulling my ID from my wallet. He looks at it, scanning through a list, probably a list of staff? His eyes light up as he, I presume sees my name on the list. "Welcome, Dr. l/n, I'll call up the head coach so he can greet you at the door." He gives me a kind smile, handing me my ID back. "Thank you, I appreciate it." I shove my ID back into my wallet, driving into the training center parking lot as the gates open for me. I park, collecting my bag as I jump out of my car. Though, not before fixing my hair and make up.

I take in my surroundings, so this is what I'll be partially calling home now. I notice some other, what I presume to be staff walk into the training center. I walk in as well, immediately being greeted by the huge Liverpool FC emblem. I hold onto my bag tightly, trying to contain my nerves.

I look to my right, the reception. The woman behind the desk looks up, flashing me a smile as I go up to her, sitting down on the chair in front of her desk.

"Hi, I'm y/n l/n. I'm here for the physiotherapist job." She stares at me for a moment, before typing something on the computer. "Nice to meet you! I'm Clara, welcome to our family. I'll call down our head physio, just a second honey.”

Her response warms my heart as I nod. So far, I think I'll feel quite comfortable here. She picks up the phone, though her expression changes into one of surprise as she looks behind me, over my shoulder. "Oh, he is here already."

My eyes follow hers, being greeted by a man, around his 50's. He walks up to me, extending his hand to me. "Welcome Dr. l/n. I've heard a lot about you, nice to finally see the woman being so highly spoken of by my colleagues." I smile and grab his hand in a firm handshake. "It's an honor to finally meet you, Dr. Woods."

He chuckles, before letting go of my hand. "Let's talk more inside, the boss wants to meet you as well." I turn back towards Clara, mumbling a quick thank you to her, before following Dr. Woods inside the training center. I glance around, it’s is even bigger in real life. I had watched some YouTube video's of the club just to prepare and calm my anxiety, but seeing it in real life was very different. We stop in front of an office, the label reading 'Manager'. I raise my eyebrows in surprise. I'd already be meeting THE Klopp. I rub my hands together trying to get rid of that anxious feeling.

Dr. Woods knocks on the door loudly, the door is opened a couple of seconds later, revealing Klopp.

"Hey, I'm here to introduce our new physiotherapist." The doctor informs. Klopp looks at me, giving me one of his famous smiles. "Right of course, come in." He opens the door wider, we both walk in. He ushers us to sit down on his red sofa's. He sticks out his hand, we shake hands as he introduces himself, with that all too well known German accent. "It's always nice to greet new members of our big family. Welcome, I'm Jürgen Klopp." I introduce myself as well, his eyes light up in recognition as I tell him my name. "I've heard very great things about you Dr. l/n. I'm very happy to see you here."

"No it's an honor for me, this club is amazing and I'm happy to contribute to the team." I reply, my worries and nerves had been washed away just like- that. I just know that this was one of the best decisions I've ever made.

We start chatting about how I've adjusted to living here, my education and my experience before they start asking different questions.

"So that means you speak how many languages?"

Dr. Woods asks curiously.

"Well my native tongues would be Dutch since I was born and raised in The Netherlands and Turkish, since I'm half Turkish. I'm also fluent in English as you can hear." We chuckle. "Though I do speak some Spanish and Catalan since I worked at FC Barcelona for two years, as you know."

"Great so you'll have no problem with speaking to the players huh? Especially our very loved Dutch players." We laugh at Klopps comment. I secretly hope that too.

Our conversation comes to an end as Klopp suggests I meet the players. He checks his watch, before looking at me. "Players will come in any moment now. They'll start with warming up." Dr. Woods chimes in. "It will be a recovery day since the team played a match yesterday as you may have followed."

Oh yeah I did. I watched it just so I could take notes on the players, the draw at the end was kind of disappointing. Though, it was better than losing.

"Right, I did watch it. Just to study a little before I do see the team play in real life."

"You're impressive Doctor, doing homework before even starting to work." Klopp says. "Oh it's nothing really, just prepares me for what I might encounter as I start working here." I dismiss.

We stand up after a short while, Dr. Woods taking me to put on my scrubs. I mentally pray they have pink ones, both of my former clubs did have them. He walks up to a machine, telling me exactly how the scrub dispenser worked. I nod, pressing some buttons before choosing my size. The scrubs are a- dark red? Well, at least they are part of the club colors. Dr. Woods leads me to the woman's staff changing room. I walk and change quickly putting my hair up in a claw clip.

I walk out of the room after putting my stuff in my locker, and installing a code on it. "I'm ready."

I tell him, he looks at my scrubs for a second. "Red looks great on you Dr. l/n, part of the family already." We chuckle before he leads me to the gym.

A sudden wave of nervousness hits me. I had known that the players were very friendly, still I couldn't help but feel like an unsure inexperienced intern again. We walk into the gym, it's big with plenty of space for calisthenic training like, push-ups and burpees. I look around seeing some the worlds best star players. I've worked some of the best football players like Lewandowski and Frenkie de Jong, but this still felt super insane.

I notice Klopp walking in as he calls for the players to gather around to introduce me. I glance around, they all give me a kind smile as Klopp tells them I'll be their new physiotherapist starting this new season, and of course he couldn't help but mention I'm Dutch. "Nice to meet everyone, I look forward to working with you all." I give them a smile, my dimples on full display. Suddenly, one of the players walks up to me, I immediately recognize him, who wouldn't? It's the caption of the team, well of his national team too. Virgil towers over me, sticking out his hand, his tall frame couldn't be compared to what you see on TV or the pitch. "Welcome to our team y/n, or should I call you doctor." He flashes me a beautiful smile, making me shake his hand and smile in respons. "Hi, y/n is fine, it's good to be here." Other players come to greet me as well, not to forget Robertson, who has to crack a joke about another Dutch person joining the club. "You'd think it was planned huh." We laugh and chat for a bit before Klopp redirects the attention back to him.

"Alright everyone, it's recovery day so take it easy and tell our doctors if something's up as they assist you."

Dr. Woods turns to me, telling me to follow his lead as I slowly start getting the gist of how everything works here. I nod at him, watching as he talks to the players about any soreness they're experiencing.

The day progress quickly as lunch time hits, we walk into the canteen. Seems like players and staff eat at the same time just like in Barcelona.

I walk through the the buffet as I'm greeted by Gakpo.

"Dus je bent echt Nederlands?" (So you're actually Dutch?) he asks in Dutch, full of curiosity. "Natuurlijk, geboren en getogen. Net als jij." (Of course born and raised. Just like you.)

He gives me a cute smile before we continue speaking in Dutch as we fill up our plates with healthy and delicious food.

He invites me to sit with the team. I glance at him wondering if it is a good idea. Well I did sit with the players at Barca too. "Are you sure?" I ask. "Yeah, look around players sit with staff at every table." I take a glance around, he was right staff and players were sitting together at every table. Chatting and laughing together. "Okay then, I'll sit with you guys."

He leads me to a table, already occupied by Trent, Virgil, Joel, Andrew and new star transfer Dominik Szoboszlai. "Doctor, very nice of you to sit with us." Virgil chimes in. "Well I couldn't refuse when Cody offered, we're practically already family based on the fact that we're Dutch hm." The table erupts in laughter, as we glance at Cody. "Of course the Dutch lad steals the doctor before we get to know her." Trent teases, his Scouse accent thick. "Where did you work before joining us?" Robbo asks, shoving a spoonful food into his mouth. Everyone at the table turns to me for my answer.

I clear my throat before answering. "I first interned at Ajax, I got a three year contact there after graduating. Then I got offered a position at Barcelona, worked there for two years." They nod in acknowledgement. Before Cody mentions something. "Oh you're the famous pretty doctor?!" I stare at him confused. "What do you mean?" "Well the national team players used to always talk about a pretty doctor working at Ajax." I raise a brow at his words, glancing at Virgil to confirm, since he also is apart of the national team. "Can't lie Doctor, they did talk about a pretty Doctor." I give them an impressed look. "I guess that would be me?" I chuckle.

We chat some more as everyone chimes in, though some of their faces turning confused. "Wait how old are you then?" One of them asks. "Oh I'm twenty-five." I reply. "Wow, you're pretty impressive for someone so young." Joel says. I thank him as we all continue eating and chatting in between bites.

Recovery training had gone by fast. I had gotten much more familiar with team and how they operate. Klopp dismisses everyone, as we all walk back into our designated changing rooms. Though, I'm quickly stopped by Dr. Woods. He tells me he'll make sure someone adds me to the staff group chat, as well as the group chat the entire club is in. We then bid each other goodbye as I enter the female staff changing room. I take a minute to sit down and to take it all in, that really just happend huh.

I change quickly putting my outfit back on and discarding my scrubs into the laundry basket. I do a quick make up refresh and hair fix before I grab my bag and take out my car keys. I walk through the hallways slowly, looking around for things I might have not seen yet. I’m totally in my own world before I hear my name being called. I turn around, I'm greeted by both Trent and Dominik, seems like they had been getting along nicely since Dominik had transferred here.

"Are you going out?" The new star asks. "Yeah, you guys aren't?" I lift a brow at them. I can see small smirks on their faces, they look like schoolboys hiding something. "Oh yes, we're leaving just now." We chat a little before we walk outside, saying goodbye to Clara at the reception. I notice other cars had parked right next to mine. "Bye doctor, we'll see ya tomorrow, right?" The Scoucer says. I nod "See you guys!" They wave before they both get into their respective cars.

I unlock my car, climbing in before closing the door. I place my bag onto the passengers seat, leaning back for a second. First day: survived.

Sadly, my peace is interrupted by a loud car horn. I raise my head and lower my window, it's the car next to me? I squint, it's an English car so I can see who it is from my seat. The person lowers down his windows as well. It's Virgil?

"What's wrong?" I half shout, so he can hear me through the loud engine of his car. "Nothing just wanted your attention." I chuckle, man these football players never got tired of teasing people. I roll my eyes playfully, before starting my car. I wave at him, before driving my car out of the parking slot.

I get home rather quickly, my speakers playing my favorite songs loudly. I enter my house, feeling fulfilled. I throw myself on my couch after washing up. I reflect on the day, the players and staff were amazingly kind. Though, that small interaction with Trent and Dominik was weird, why were they so smirky?

[deerspherestudios]

Game Progress Update!

Since I've posted this devlog on the game page, I'm happy to announce Day 2 script is complete! :-D However, this doesn't mean the next update is right around the corner. In fact it's probably a long ways off as I still have the artwork, coding, and sounds to do next; but progress is progress!

For now my game plan is to keep working on the script for Day 3 and onwards, while also coding Day 2 into Ren'py. For all I know I'll be done with the script before starting any of the artwork ;v; But I think it's a good compromise as I have better balance between personal work and college work. For more ramblings info and sneaky peeks:

@isabellaswork Since I'm not sure if you can respond to submissions, I'll address this here! The next update will be a full one!! Regarding the timeline, I've stated before I'm hoping to release and finish the game by this year but uh, judging from the amount of content I have for Day 2 alone, that might be further off than I realized.

This might be sad news to some, but I assure you the longer I work on the script, there could possibly be hours' worth of MO content in store. (Just proofreading the Day 2 script took me an hour start to finish so imagine the scale of,,,, possibly 5 days, ,,)

I never expected people to have this much interest in MO; I really want this game to be the best I can make it, even if it means delaying it for the foreseeable future.

Anyway, enough with the downers. Here's some sneak peeks for Day 2 (don't mind the formatting, I've yet to streamline my writing to coding process):

I'll start to implement it into Ren'py with the proper code work and ask my beta tester to play it once that's done! :-) Overall I'm happy with it, I'm as excited as ever to share this project with everyone. I wish I could graduate faster just to work on it full time but oh well, that's a little bit further in the future </3

I'll leave you with these until my next update; Mushroom Oasis Day 2 spoilers without context:

Have fun speculating <3 Until next time, fireflies <3<3

[dangerously-human]

Still fighting for my life with tuition benefit stuff, in case anyone was wondering. I would like to submit my request for this semester, but we're still duking it out over last semester because of a problem from over a year ago and I don't want to swing at two hornet nests at once, so. Took every single dollar out of my savings account to pay tuition for this semester and am just praying I can get reimbursed before another rent check needs to go out (and Lord willing, my car won't need massive repairs at inspection this year). I'm doing an actual research study for my mixed methods class this semester, and the professor keeps saying she's fine with giving us an incomplete so we have another year to wrap it up in order to actually get something meaningful out of it. I finally talked to her last night to explain that I cannot afford to take another incomplete and ask how I could do a legitimate study on such a condensed timeline. Thankfully she was understanding and came up with an idea I think will work, since it involves basically just doing the quantitative portion under an existing protocol at work and a qualitative portion that doesn't count as human subjects research, so I don't have to deal with an IRB pissing contest between institutions, nor the debatable ethics of collecting data without compensating people for their time, given that it's unfunded research (and I really can't afford to pay people out of pocket when I'm already paying through the nose to be in this class in the first place). I'm still reworking my research plan, but I do feel a lot better about this in comparison to my plan as of last week, which would have required either submitting to both IRBs (and my work IRB is notorious for having different standards than most, and they/the data lawyers that often end up getting involved move slowly in this kind of situation) or submitting twice to my university IRB, once per phase.

Anyway, dealing with all of this today had me looking at what I really have left to do before I graduate. I'm halfway through the program now, though it feels like I've done way more. After I'm done with this class, which meets my advanced methods requirement (although round 2 of statistics probably did too), I have to eventually go back and take the foundations of the program course that was a scheduling conflict my first semester and somehow hasn't been offered since; another research apprenticeship (I'll probably write another manuscript, ideally one that's already been in progress for a bit at work - if I can get a loan, maybe I can do that this summer with my brief report I'm first authoring); plus two electives, which I was hoping to concentrate on measure design but would also happily do more advanced statistics courses if I'm allowed to take them through the school of psychology (I've tapped out the school of ed on that score). I guess I should ask if I'm allowed to say my job counts as an internship, which from the course catalog it looks like it should, but idk. Theoretically that puts me graduating... fall '25? Maybe? I could go so much faster if it weren't for the financial aspect. I do have to meet with an advisor at some point, but I still don't have one at the moment (again), which really seems like a problem for future me to figure out. But future me before May, because I think I'm still recorded as supposed to graduate this semester, even though it's been clear from the beginning that I was not a full-time student. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

They really do make this grad school thing as complicated as possible, don't they?

[shelandsorcery]

I had a question about what gouache I use over on cohost, so I'm crossposting the answer here for anyone who's curious:

So I've tried a few different types of gouache, including the very affordable jelly gouache sets they have on aliexpress/amazon, and I've settled on forking over for the good stuff as the best way to get the results I want with minimum fuss. So here's the lineup of my collection of tubes right now!

The bulk of my paints are from Winsor & Newton - this was the brand we bought our starter kids from at art school, and if you notice any doubles in that lineup, it's because friends gave me their half-used tubes after graduation when they vowed to never gouache again. Some of those tubes are VERY old, but as long as they aren't fully solid, they're still good to go, so I keep them around. Also if they ARE fully solid, it's never a bad idea to try cutting the paint brick out of the tube and using it like a pan gouache. It usually works.

Through the pandemic tho I've been watching a lot of other gouache painters all over the world on youtube, and it did indeed get me hungry to try other brands! So the rest of my paints are from M. Graham (honey based gouache, dark colours aren't as opaque but holy heck they are pigmented) and from Holbein (really creamy consistency overall), including a bunch on the right there that I bought as one-offs from their fancy seasonal Irodori sets (some of my favourite pastels oh my gosh).

These are all traditional gouache, not acryl/acrylic gouache (though my partner @goshdarnheck has a solid collection of those), so these will rehydrate from dry - some faster, some slower, but it means I can often work with them dried out in pans instead of squeezing out fresh paint every time I sit down. This does take the sting off the price tag a bit - and makes plein air a lot less stressful and messy.

The other nice thing these days is that most art stores now sell online and ship worldwide (or nearly) and it's possible to track down some decently affordable paints that way. If you're also in or around Toronto, fyi, you can find W&N and Holbein gouache tubes at Gwartzman's art supplies for very good prices, and that's where I was able to get my single irodori paints as well. They do one day delivery in the city limits, it's amazing.

If you have any questions about my palettes, or particular colours, definitely drop them in the replies or my asks and I'll be happy to go into more depth!

[jamsandsuch]

i'll be honest i've been having a little of an existential crisis since getting my graduate school acceptance.

in the opening to teaching to transgress, bell hooks talks about how when she was offered tenure she fell into a spiral. and for me, i thought that getting my acceptance to my master's program would help but if anything it's only made me feel terrified that i'm doing the wrong thing with my life.

i'm a budding sociologist and kind of by nature of that my work is tied up in activism; even moreso when my entire body of research is about my diasporic community and ways to improve our standing, the histories that brought us here, the future trajectory of our community. growing up with crippling anxiety, i've strayed away from having strong opinions, from upsetting anyone too much. growing up as a southeast asian immigrant, i strayed away from being noticed too much at all. academica offered me that space to form those opinions, and i think there was some power in that: for once i was encouraged and even rewarded for my years of quiet observation and the pent up rage and injustice i've locked away in response. naturally, academia became my safe space and i decided to pursue grad school and a career in academia. but as i see myself moving forward, i increasingly realize that as a person of color in academia, especially with the particular subject matter i've chosen for myself, i kind of need to step into that spotlight i've been so afraid of. and especially when those opinions will carry so much political weight, so much responsibility, those anxieties i've carried with me since i was little, that unfamiliarity with being seen is weighing down on me so much and i feel like i'm suffocating.

a few months ago i attended an event in my diasporic community hosted by a local activist group. they were extremely supportive and interested in my research and asked for more insight into what research like mine looks like. at the time my study was still in ethics board purgatory so i didn't have much progress to share with them, which i understandably lamented about. one of the members, who shared with me previously how they had been disillusioned by academia and thus dropped out, remarked as I outlined all the bureaucratic barriers that exist in academia: "You see that's the problem - I could go out into the neighbourhood and ask people those questions right now, put them together, distribute leaflets or organize a rally, and it would all happen so much faster and without this red tape." at the time i only agreed - mostly because i first read this as sympathizing with my academic exhaustion - but recently i've been revisiting those words as a question about if i'm really doing the right thing with my life, bigger questions about the purpose of my work more generally.

last week i attended an incredible talk by a journalist visiting from my home country who documents the human rights abuses happening domestically. as a qualitative researcher, and particularly as an urban/community sociologist, i was interested in the subject of her talk which was pertaining to building community through journalism. i was wondering if i may be able to 1) learn more about my country's politics and 2) learn more about how my work might facilitating community building. but what i walked away with was a growing discomfort in my stomach as that activist's words returned to me during that talk - this journalist was doing admirable, incredibly valuable work. the work was timely. it was immediate. it was influential. then what of my work? i've been working on my undergraduate thesis for eight months. this week alone i've spent over twelve hours hunched at my desk painstakingly transcribing interviews for analysis. and for what? to present at an undergraduate conference? to have it tossed into a sea of uncited papers? at the end of the talk a professor raises her hand to ask how academia and journalism can partner together to work towards a common goal. the speaker's response was geared towards the support they've received from quantitative researchers' data. as a qualitative researcher, what makes me different from a journalist besides a fancy university title and years' worth of institutional bureaucratic barriers my work must pass before publication? and beyond that, will it ever even be cited at all? i hoped to speak to the speaker afterward with my question, but they promptly had to leave. i walked back home and stared at my wall for a while.

two weeks ago one of my classes i teach for hosted a panel with activists from various diaspora. one student raises their hand and asks if one panelist, an iranian woman, feels afraid about the possibility of being targeted and killed for her activist work to which she calmly responds that she is expecting it. i feel a chill go down my spine as i wonder if i should be that selfless too. later during office hours a student shares with me that he's starting a project in partnership with an activist group to make critical race theory and asian diasporic history accessible beyond the ivory tower to laypeople. i wonder if i should be doing that too. with every moment i stand in front of these folks i feel like i'm standing up against everything that my work is not doing. i should be making this work accessible. i should be making this work faster. i should be ready to die in defense of my work. this guilt chokes me like a noose and with every moment i spend lying awake in bed thinking about it i string myself up higher like a flag for the world to laugh at. look at me, another useless scholar with impostor syndrome.

when it comes to the kind of work i do, i recognize that academia without activism is nothing short of ego boosting and extraction. and yet at the same time we're asked to somehow distance ourselves from political opinions so as to maintain the objectivity of our work. when i see the advocacy work done by fellow students on campus, i increasingly feel like a phoney intellectualizing work that's happening in real time on the ground that myself and my colleagues are removed from. this and my years of anxiety, and the fear around activism generated by being raised by parents from a country that has targeted academics for their politically provocative work have concocted the perfect storm of existential crisis, paranoia, guilt, and a deep seated desire to disappear. i feel useless in my work, helpless in my desire to be a part of an activist scene, and hopeless about my impact as a human being all at once. cue a pathetic image of some tortured scholar locked away in an ivory tower wiping their tears with sheets of gold leaf or something while the world burns outside. woe is me.

i brought these thoughts (or at least these thoughts as they were half baked) to one of my professors previously and he told me that i need to stop thinking. that i need to focus on what's immediately important to me: finish my thesis. get my bachelors degree. so this week during my midterm break i tried, i really did. i dove back into my old hobbies. engaged in some self care by spending time with my friends, exploring the city. and as i've done so i've realized - i'm so happy. so, so happy to be doing my hobbies. and that's just left me increasingly wondering if i'll ever claw my way out of this hole i've dug for myself: when I look at my instructors around me i see their work life balance wrecked. i see their unsustainable salaries despite all the incredible work they do and all the extra time they sank into their extra years of education (i recently learned that the published faculty salaries in our university's financial report are actually inflated, so the salaries are in fact much worse than I was led to believe and believe me, my expectations were already low - and this is at a T40). i wish i was kidding when i say that there are instructors i've known that began teaching during my first year and who i've slowly watched have the light drained out of their eyes over the last three years.

is this my destiny? to forever feel this way? to sink years of my life earning poverty wages as a TA and RA, delaying when i will finally settle down, sinking my family's money into a education for a job that won't make that money back unless by some miracle i land a tenure track position out of my phd? and all that knowing that there's a shortage of jobs for the number of phds in my field? and all of this knowing that there are folks out there doing work that's actually on the pulse of what's going on, more timely, and without the hierarchical nature of academic research?

do i think i'm going to find any of the answers i'm looking for right now? probably not. but i just feel the shadow of my future looming over me as i'm committing to grad school and i don't know what to do about it. i wake up every morning with a weight on my chest and when i think about it i can't breathe. maybe bell hooks really is a lot more relatable than i thought.

[starbberryblue]

TODAY IS ALMOST OVER AND I NEARLY FORGOT TO MENTION IT!! I AM NOW OFFICIALLY ONE YEAR ON TESTOSTERONE‼️💪🎉🔥💯

so much has changed. i have a shitty little mustache now. i can speak comfortably in public or in class. i realized im like 90% hetero (at least as of now) but still retain my bi card because some dudes are fine as hell. i dont have to hide my face with my hair anymore. i can lift like 3x what i used to despite not working out at all. i dont have to bind every time i leave the house cause my shit deflated. im starting to feel like the meat mech im piloting kinda looks like the guy in my brain!! :]

my goals before i hit year two which i will update on this post if i remember to are:

legally change my name

increase my dosage (i started low bc i had naturally higher t levels pre-t, but now i feel like it could definitely go a bit faster lol)

research doctors + insurance stuff and get my top surgery referral

possibly maybe perhaps get an actual workout routine so i can alleviate some more bodily dysphoria via sick gains? (very tentative due to my horrid little adhd brain's routine aversion but i REALLY want to give it a solid try)

and from there i'll just see where that takes me! i'm really hoping i'll be able to get top surgery by 2026, and since i graduate next semester i wont have to worry about taking time out from school to recover, just work which i will hopefully be doing from home.

okay today ends in five minutes and i dont know how to finish this poast. IF YOU ARE TRANS YOU HAVE TO LIVE!! ILY 🫶🏳️‍⚧️

[themoonsbride]

hey darling<3 i would love to request a fluff with peter protecting y/n when she's having an argument with dr brenner or someone from the stuff and he's like "touch her or say smth about her and i'll kill you"🧎🏻‍♀️😫

hello!! yes of course I can do that for you, thank you for requesting ! <3 I hope you like it/enjoy.

Protected.

Summary; Reader gets threatened by one of her co-workers for breaking one of the lab rules, Peter threatens their life as his way of protecting the reader.

warnings; mentions of murder, anxiety, and threats

requested; yes!

You roamed down the hall looking for the double doors that lead to the rainbow room. You were about to be late as you checked you watch and then began to walk at a faster pace to reach where you're meant to be as of right now. As you turned down the hall you'd bumped into one of the male orderly, you knew this due to the work attire that was clothed onto the person's slim frame. Though you didn't bother to look at whom you'd rammed into and only replied with a sorry as you continued practically running down the hall. The male you bumped into watched you turn down the next hall as he straightened out his shirt and fixed his blond curl.

You entered through the double doors and saw multiple of the children's eyes land on you, in response you smiled softly at them and flattened out your skirt with your hands as Alec looked over at you with an expression of disappointment and confusion. You stood in your place on the other side of the double doors since Alec was already standing on the left side of the doors.

"Where the hell were you?" Alec whispered over to you. you looked over at him with your brows furrowed a bit as you felt your nose scrunch slightly. You never liked him, he was such a teachers pet towards Brenner, well, more like a bosses pet then.

"It's not your place to ask Alec." You said as calm as possible even though annoyance was straining your voice like nails on a chalkboard. You tried to be polite but it was clearly failing as miserably as the staff were feeling here. Except you seemed to be the only one who thought I was just the tiniest bit decent. The children were nice to work with, though it mightve been because there were no other female orderly, atleast not that you've met or seen, or even heard of.

Alec scoffed at your reply as he rolled his eyes and went back to his duties of keeping an eye on the subjects and also zoning out whilst wishing he'd never even got hired for this damn job. The coffee was as pathetic as the orderly's efforts of caring about anything anymore. Yeah Brenner was a stuck up hag, but he could be easy to deal with if you just did your job correctly.

Brenner seemed to have taken quite a liking to you though, whether it was because you were well behaved, or because he thought you were pretty you weren't sure, but you just assumed it wasn't anything creepy, because you were well behaved, you did do your job the way it was meant to be done. You graduated highschool and collage and were pretty smart. There were more than just Brenner who'd seemed to take a liking in your smartness, not only just that but your beauty too.

You knew you were beautiful, your mother always told when you were growing up that you were developing into a beautiful young woman and would make something amazing out of yourself one day, she was right about beauty, not so much about making something out of yourself. Seriously, you were practically working inside of what felt like a mental hospital, not something most people would be proud of or call 'amazing'.

But there was a particular individual who seemed to catch your eye quite often. His name was Peter, and you guys were actually decently close, each day you grew closer and closer. Over time you'd find yourself thinking about him whilst looking over the children, or would catch yourself staring at him in the breakroom or in meetings sometimes. There were even a few incidents where you caught him looking at you before he'd quickly bat his eyes away and focus back onto what he'd been originally doing.

Peter was never typically one to open up or be talkative with people, and you didn't mind it at all, you used to be the same exact way in middle school and highschool. But it was because of your anxiety that you didn't talk to people and had very few friends. Even though you knew Peter didn't have anxiety, it could be difficult to find it in yourself to talk to the other people here, especially if it isn't necessary.

But when you were around eachother, it seemed like there wasn't any fear, or difficulty when it came to talking. You could tell him stories and things you've heard in your life and even just give him random motivation life advice and he would listen. He could listen to your voice for hours. And after awhile, he'd realized he fell in love with you, and wanted do anything to keep you out of dangers way. And he would too.

You hadn't even realized you were zoning out until you felt small tugs at the end of skirt, when you looked down, there was a small Eleven looking up at you with innocent dough eyes, and you just couldn't help but smile at her, she was your favorite out of all of them.

"Did you need something?" You asked her sweetly and quietly. she pointed over to a small bin of building blocks and took your hand as she lead you over to them.

She sat down on her knees as you sat criss cross infront of her as she took out the blocks one by one, when she finished she looked up at you again.

"Build." she said quietly, You were confused what it was exactly that she wanted you to build, so you just looked at her for a couple of seconds before grabbing some blocks and attempting to build a house with them. Once you finished you smiled at her, She moved one of the blocks slightly with her mind and they all toppled over.

She looked down at the pile of scattered colorful wooden shapes before sadness laced around her pupils.

"It's okay Eleven, why don't you take a turn building something." You spoke softly and she looked at you without moving her head, you smiled comfortingly at her before she looked back at the blocks and just decided to attempt to hand you one with her mind. You were confused again.

You just stared at her. She started at you. "What am I supposed to do with this sweetie?" You asked her. glancing at the other wooden pieces and at her. Alec watched the 2 of you from across the room, eavesdropping in on what you'd been saying to Eleven. 'Sweetie? what was she, your daughter?' Alec thought to himself. He didn't like how you'd been acting so kind to her like she was your daughter.

You'd never thought of having kids before, but that didn't mean you couldn't treat these kids with kindness right? It's the least you could've done for them after all. Besides, what's the harm in calling them cute names like 'Sweetie' and 'Honey'?

You just got odd break with Peter. You could feel your face was warm and a smile was curved on your lips, making your mouth muscles sore. There were butterflies tickling the inside of your stomach as they fluttered around inside your body. The way he'd make small flirty comments every now and again, how he'd look at you with his glistening blue eyes as deep as an ocean that you could drown in if you stared into them for too long. He felt like a dream to be around and to look at, his hair was always perfectly neat and done everyday, and his clothes were always pristine and straightened.

Later on that day as you roamed the halls during your break, someone from behind had called your name. You stopped abruptly and turned your head to look behind you, it was Alec. 'Great. what does he want' you mentally asked yourself feeling annoyance rush over you.

"What is it Alec" you said trying to hide the fact you didn't want to see him as a child would hide candy behind their back.

"I need to talk to you." He said somewhat sternly, You felt yourself groan in annoyance, he treated you as if you were 5 and didn't have common sense, it pissed you off dearly.

"About what?" you asked as he approached you, suddenly goosebumps crawling up your spine as you began to feel as though someone may have been watching the two of you, somewhere from afar where you wouldn't be able to see, you tried to ignore it as he stood infront of you, his facial expression seeming like a parent who'd just reviewed their child's report card that had F's and D's printed on it.

"You know you're not allowed to mother the children." He said, the sterness in his voice not leaving. "What does it matter? they don't even recognize they're being mistreated, the least I could do is make them feel like someone cares." You instantly reply.

"Someone who cares? Why would you even care in the first place? They don't 'regonize' that what your doing is wrong." He said harshly.

"What I'm doing is wrong? Have you not seen what goes on in this place? If anything Brenner is the one whose doing them wrong." You barked back and he immediately made you hit back against the wall, his hands that pushed against your shoulders were rough and hard. It caught you off gaurd as fear began to tremble inside your body.

"If you continue to mother those subjects, or speak of our boss that way again, I'll make sure you pay for it." Alec threatened you, You didn't exactly know how you were meant to react, but you knew you were scared. You'd seen how Brenner had punished Peter before. It was horrible, you didn't want to have to go through what he unfortunately went through, You hated this place and everyone inside it.

"Is that understood?" He asked glaring deep into your pupils filled with fear, his filled with anger. You nodded quickly and gulped nervously.

He quickly moved away from you and soon was out of your sight. You stood there in complete shock of all the events that just occurred as your deep scared breathing slowly regulated. Your head shook quickly as if you were trying to snap a thought outside of your mind to make it go away as you checked your watch and continued on with your day.

Later that night whilst you were sitting at your desk inside your bedroom, working on paperwork and filling out a few forms, you'd thought you heard something outside in the hallways but just decided to ignore it, assuming it was one of the night guards just working the night shift.

Peter was walking down a hall, as he checked his watch and took note of how his shift would be over soon, he searched for something, or more so someone. His blue eyes darted and scattered the halls like a wild fox looking for its meek pray.

He found Alec only a few moments later and straightened out his mind, clearing his thought process and began to walk towards him.

"Hey Alec" He said calmly. Alex turned his head to see who'd been calling him, his expression not changing much when seeing Peter as he was opening one of the storage closet doors, about to walk inside.

"Hey Peter." He replied simply as Peter caught up to him.

"May I speak to you for a moment?" Alec walked inside the storage closet as he spoke.

"Yeah, What is it." He said as he was rummaging through a box looking for something. The blond man unnoticeablely checked for anyone around before stepping inside and quietly closing the door, turning the lock slowly.

"Earlier today.." Peter said as his voice had suddenly deepened while he looked down at his shiny black shoes. Alec turned to face Peter, nothing the door was closed, but he didn't seem to care all that much.

"Yeah?" He said confused, waiting for him to get to the point, He never spoke to Peter, and didn't prefer to either.

Peter looked up at him as his now soft blue eyes had turned cold and hard, as he walked closer to Alec, making his back hit the wall just like Alec had previously done to you. He was extremely confused now and even a bit nervous, as Peter used what little power he could that his sorteria didn't fully block to start to choke Alec, it was only cutting his oxygen off by a small amount.

"Don't ever fucking speak to Y/n like that or think about getting that close to her ever, again. Or I'll kill you." He said clearly, sternly, calmly. He turned his head to the side just a tad bit as he'd threatened Alec's life, He just stared at Peter feeling terrified.

"Don't let Brenner find out about this either." Alec quickly shook his head in agreement, signaling he understood, he'd leave you alone, he'd live. Peter waited a few extra seconds before letting him go and simply leaving like nothing happened.

He soon approached your bedroom door and knocked, feeling his veins tingle as they hit the hardwood door. You got up and answered it, suprised to see him at your door.

"Hey peter, did you need something?" You asked while smiling at him a little confused, he stepped closer to you and kissed your forehead.

"No, I'm just here to say goodnight." He said looking down at you a bit as you stood there frozen in suprise and felt yourself become flustered as your cheeks became warm.

"Goodnight Y/n." He said smirking and closed the door, leaving you there with your face as red as a bundle of roses.

[blargenswarg]

I recently started doing some part-time freelance programming work. Which feels great because I've had very little income since I graduated college.

Still working on my game Spider Endeavour, its just taking a long time to make, and now that I have a job its going to take even longer. I would post more devlog stuff, but that too takes time, and putting effort into social media is just not really that much fun for me. Still, I appreciate anyone who wants to stick around and see my stuff when I do post them.

I'm doing my best to have the first beta version out this year, then I'll finish it with updates, and then I'll either work on a project with a simpler artstyle so I can make art faster or I'll get a full time job instead.

Here's a screenshot: