#But do think it's only because his life is a nightmare
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gudfornuthin ¡ 2 days ago
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Want You So Bad
Dae-ho/number 388 x fem!reader
(MDNI)
A/N: No thoughts, just Dae-ho. I thought these anon asks worked well together so I’ve combined them into one. I hope this is what you guys wanted, and apologies for my poorly written smut lol. (Also apologies if the Korean isn’t correct, copied it from a romanised version on Google) Feedback is appreciated :)
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“Dunggulge dunggulge, jjak
Binggeulbinggeul doragamyeo chum-eul chupsida
Sonppyeogeul chimyeonseo, jjak
Noraereul bureumyeo, jjak
Rallallalla jeulgeoupge chumchuja
Ringga ringga ringga, ringga ringga ring Sone soneul japgo modu da hamkke jeulgeoupge twieo bopsida”
Standing on the turning floor, your vision is going dizzy and your stomach is churning. There’s blood everywhere, and you’re trying not to think about all the people who were killed in the last round. You almost didn’t make it. But you got lucky. Mainly because of the man standing next to you.
You look to your left, Dae ho’s side profile devoid of any emotions. You’d only known each other for a couple of days (at least that’s what you thought. Time in here is weird) but you’d already grown close. Closer than you expected to with anyone in this nightmare fuelled place. But you trusted him the most. And he’d also saved your life during red light green light.
He finally feels your stare and turns to look at you. He smiles slightly. “You okay?”
He knows you’re not, but you smile back either way. “Yeah.”
The floor suddenly stops moving, and the lights dim. The group prepare for their next number.
“Five.”
Chaos ensues, as everyone begins to panic, grabbing and pulling, hoping they have the right amount of people. Dae ho holds your hand, as he quickly follows Gi hun, and two other people you’re yet to know the names of. You run as fast as you can, trying to find an available room.
Just as you’re about to make it to one of the doors, someone slams into you hard, knocking you off your feet and losing Dae ho’s firm grip.
“Y/N!” You hear him exclaim, before completely losing sight of him and the others.
The thought of dying consumes you as reality sets in. You feel like screaming and throwing up the little food they’d given you last night. Before you have the chance, strong arms lift you up and drag you to an open door. Getting a grip on your footing, you rush into the room, just as the timer runs out. The door locks and gunshot can be heard from outside your safe space.
Breathing heavily, you feel a soft touch on your back, rubbing up and down.
“Are you alright?”
You glance to the side, the number ‘333’ catching your attention first. You look up to be met by the kind eyes of your saviour. You nod rapidly, still trying to catch your breath.
“You saved my life,” is the only thing you can say.
He laughs halfheartedly. “You sort of saved ours too.”
You stand up to your full height, remembering the other people in the room with you. You quickly thank them as well and they nod.
“I’m Myung gi by the way,” player 333 says.
“Y/N,” you reply, smiling at each other.
The door unlocks as everyone slowly makes their way out. As you leave the room, yelling can be heard from across the room. It’s Dae ho. You see him push a player you don’t recognise up against the wall, as he continues screaming in their face.
“She’s dead because of you!”
You rush over, hoping to stop this before it turns into a full blown fist fight.
“Dae ho!” You call out.
He stops what he’s doing and frantically searches for you. Your eyes meet, and he lets the player go, running over to meet you halfway. He throws his arms around your waist, shocking you briefly, but also wrapping your arms around his shoulders. He squeezes you tight, his face buried in your neck.
“I’m okay,” you whisper. “I’m fine.”
Dae ho pulls away and holds you at arms length. “I thought they killed you. I just… what happened?”
You feel a presence behind you, and turn to find Myung gi standing awkwardly a few steps behind. You nod at him to come closer, taking him by the arm. Dae ho flinches slightly at the motion.
“I was a goner, had it not been for my knight in shining armour here grabbing and saving me.”
Myung gi laughs at the nickname you give him. “Don’t sell yourself short. We saved each other really.”
You continue smiling at each other, all the while Dae ho watches the sickly sweet interaction. Weird feelings bubble up in his stomach, one of relief but another of petty jealousy. He tries to brush it off, as he nods at the man standing next to you.
The game continues on for a couple more rounds, until you figure out there’s only one more to go. 126 players. 50 doors. That means only 2 people per room. You’re standing in between Dae ho and Myung gi, finding it hard to breathe.
The floor stops moving, and the number is called.
“Two.”
Both of the men on either side of you reach out at the same time to take your hand. Myung gi is faster, as he links your fingers with his and rushes towards the door in front of you. You stumble behind him, looking back and seeing Dae ho watching on like a kicked puppy. Thankfully someone grabs him as they too head for an empty room, his sad expression imprinted in your mind.
- - -
Night rolls around, and Dae ho finds it hard to fall asleep. After the last round of Mingle, Myung gi didn’t leave your side once. He seemed eager to know more about you, where you were from, and why you chose to be apart of the game. Dae ho knows it’s wrong to feel jealous. After all, he’d only known you for two days, and most of that time is spent either sleeping or trying not to be killed.
Yet it bothers him to no end. It bothered him when you two hugged at the end of Mingle. It bothered him when you two shared food with each other. It bothered him when Myung gi asked if he could sleep closer to you tonight. It shouldn’t. But it did.
Dae ho feels himself almost drift off into a deep sleep, when he hears scuffling to his right. You’re slowly getting up, rubbing your eyes and hobbling to the front of the large room. His eyes follow your every move, as you knock on the door to where the toilets are. A guard appears and after some brief back and forth, opens the door and allows you to enter.
He lies back down. You still run through his mind.
“Fuck it.”
Dae ho crawls out from under the bed and speed walks over to the door. He knocks and makes the excuse that he needs a piss. Another back and forth with the less than happy guard, but once again the door opens and he walks through.
He makes his way up the stairs and, making sure the guard isn’t paying attention, heads for the women’s bathroom. He walks in, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable and stupid. What’s the plan? Profess your love to a stranger you just met and how you can’t stand the thought of them being with anyone else? Dae ho knows you’ll tell him he’s gone mad. And maybe it’s not love. Something more intense. Something more primal. There’s only one way of finding out.
The flush of a toilet sounds as you walk out of one of the stalls, jumping slightly when you spot Dae ho by the sinks.
“Shit. You scared me.”
“Sorry.”
You walk over and stand by his side, washing your hands thoroughly, as he waits in silence.
After you’ve finished, he decides to speak up. “So, you’re getting on well with player 333?”
“Myung gi,” you respond. Dae ho doesn’t care for learning his name. “And yeah, he doesn’t really have anyone else in here to talk to and I don’t mind the company.”
He nods as you continue talking, leaning next to him on the sinks. “He also saved my life in the last game, so there’s no way I’m abandoning him now.”
Dae ho tries not to rolls his eyes, but can’t stop himself from huffing like a child. “I saved your life too but nah let’s put him on a pedestal,” he mumbles under his breath.
Unfortunately you hear what he says, sending him a puzzled look. “Do you have a problem with Myung gi?”
Dae ho stares at you, wondering how to respond. He doesn’t want to sound like a possessive, overprotective boyfriend, because he isn’t one. But he also knows it’s getting harder and harder to hide his brewing feelings for you.
“Nothing I just,” he huffs again. “I feel like you’re gonna wanna spend more time with him instead of me.”
You laugh, shocking him slightly, as you move to stand in front of him. “So just because I’ve made a new friend means I have to ditch you?”
Dae ho shrugs, feeling embarrassed and incredibly dumb.
You poke him softly in the stomach. “I like you. I wanna get to know you better. Hopefully outside of this hellhole.”
He laughs along with you now, staring deeply into your eyes. “I like you too.”
The air around you suddenly feels hot, a tension you didn’t realise was there until now. You move closer, testing the waters, and thankfully Dae ho does the same thing. One second more, and your lips lock in a passionated, heated kiss. Dae ho grips your hips hard while you run your fingers through his hair.
“Wait,” you say through the kiss. “What if one of the guards comes in?”
Dae ho shakes his head vigorously. “They don’t care. We could be killing each other in here and they wouldn’t stop us.”
“Romantic,” you reply sarcastically, as he moves to kiss your neck.
You moan, feeling your back press against the wall. Even though the guards don’t care what goes on in here, you know they’ll start to question why you’re taking so long. So, as you continue kissing Dae ho, you reach for his pants and pull them down slightly. He’s shocked at first, then quickly catches on to what you’re doing and pulls yours down a little bit too.
“Are you sure,” Dae ho tries to catch his breath. “You wanna do this?”
“I’m not stopping now.”
He lifts you up spreading your legs to wrap around his waist. You feel him push into you slowly, eliciting a gasp from your mouth. His thrusts amp up as he fills you entirely. Your make out session goes interrupted, as beads of sweat form on your skin, the taste of salt landing on your tongues.
You’re about to scream his name, when a bang on the entrance door stops you both in your tracks.
A deep voice booms from the other side. “What’s taking you so long in there?”
Dae ho puts you down on the floor, clumsily pulling his pants back up around his waist as you do the same. You’re both breathless, hair a mess and lips swollen.
“Almost done!” Dae ho calls out, not thinking of how the guard will react to him being in the women’s bathroom.
He turns to you, kissing you briefly on the lips. “We’re not finished here.”
For the first time since you came here, you couldn’t wait for another night.
- - -
Taglist
@meeeeeees-stuff @lemon-lysol @smally97 @idkidkidk22333 @whatthefuckeryfuckityfuck @k1michii @maymustdie @honey-whiskey-666
(Apologies for anyone I couldn’t tag)
(More to come as I have a lot more requests)
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transmascaraa ¡ 3 days ago
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bf!kinich headcanons!
simple life.
bf!kinich x gn!reader
author's note: hi i'm back with something new after a month or smth anyway i hope you guys have been doing well^^ (this one is basically about how you two live and i'm excited to write for kinich lmao i hope he's not ooc)
"you like it, no?"
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-(this man managed to become my favorite char after 3 years of scara)
-he's literally ideal like not only is he literally gorgeous, but he's also so fucking kind-hearted regardless of the fact that people see him as scary
-he's nonchalant but at he same time not at all
-anyways that wasn't the point
-he always wakes up before you somehow and if he has a commission early in the morning, he'll probably just kiss you goodbye and leave in silence
-but if he doesn't have any commissions early then enjoy the morning with him
-his good morning kisses are usually on your forehead, but you're sometimes lucky to get a kiss on the lips from him(he's such a good gentle kisser trust me)
-HE DOES THE COOKING IN THE HOUSE. NO EXCUSES. AND COOKS THE BEST FOOD EVER. (he's latino in my mind and i literally can't imagine him not cooking for his s/o)
-you can clean if you want but he's always cooking the best food ever and he loves doing it especially since he gets to see your happy face afterwards and your compliments for his cooking
-you two probably have a little garden near your house where he grows vegetables and you plant flowers all around as decorations
-if he ever comes home injured you're quick to patch him up and scold him about taking some random dangerous commission
-he says he won't do it again and that he knows exactly what you mean but it just keeps happening unfortunately
-i forgot to mention ajaw in your guys' relationship. well shit.
-he ruins any situation you have with him so that's the reason he's in timeout 90% of the time dw (the 10% is just arguing with eachother until kinich throws him to the sky)
-i believe he has ptsd in some way so nightmares might not be uncommon for him
-the worst this about it is that he would never tell you. never ever. he thinks it's not fair that you comfort him but he can't repay you in any way
-so even if you reassure him it's okay because he also comforts you, he always finds an excuse like "but i'm not good with words, my comfort isn't as valuable as your's."
-next up, he's probably not into pda
-sure you can hold hands and add a kiss here and there but it's nothing too much
-if you're into it, he'll try to make it up to you but it won't really work out too well so you can try to find a balance with him which will be easy for you both
-his love language is probably quality time with some additional physical touch and gift giving
-he has such gentle hands probably because he plays a lot of games(gamer kinich is undeniable)
-usually likes when you play with him because he finds it as something that builds your relationship further
-but if you just feel like watching him play that's alright as well like literally just sit on his lap while he plays some random game and you can fall asleep there because SOMEHOW he's pretty calm when he loses and doesn't exactly "rage" and just whispers "fuck/shit" or something
-he brings you trinkets from his commissions definitely especially when it's from somewhere far
-even the simplest things
-he'll make a bouquet out of random flowers and plants he found on the way and tie them together with some strong grass or something
-at night, when the both of you have nothing to do for the rest of the day, there's a few things you could do with him
-he could give you a massage, you could watch him play, you could play with him, he could simply cuddle with you, or watch a movie with you, or take a walk outside together, hang out with mualani and/or kachina, basically anything
-when he isn't with you he listens to the playlist he made to remind him of you
-loves when you send him videos of like cats and then say "us" because he finds it cute(he hearts every msg)
-very good at teasing but he doesn't do it often for whatever reason
-also doesn't really get jealous since he trusts you
-but he knows when you need him to protect you since you're like a rare emerald in his eyes
-doesn't break promises because he takes them really seriously
-if you suggest getting a pet(let's say it's a yumkasaurus in this situation) he would agree immediately
-he'll first of all explain to you everything you need to know about them and what they do, what they need and like
-and if you're okay with it in the end, then you can expect a yumkasaur as a present on your anniversary, birthday, or some holiday you celebrate
-he makes your birthday really special but ofc often forgets his own so when you surprise him it takes a second for him to understand the situation and then says you didn't have to
-finally, going to sleep with him is also perfect
-cuddles most likely, and if you prefer, he can play something simple like minecraft or stardew valley etc in bed next to you until you can finally fall asleep
-in simple words he's the perfect bf if his personality is what you're looking for :p
-(bonus for the people who also hc him as latino or simply spanish-speaking, he would definitely help you learn spanish if you don't already speak it. and if you also speak some other language he would love to try and learn it.)
~~~~~
DAMN this was long
probably because it was a random rush of motivation all of a sudden
i wish this happened more often smh i hope you all enjoyed anyway lol
| @mariaace <3
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asarigg ¡ 2 days ago
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Inside the Character's Mind: Part 6
CHILDHOOD. SLY AND KOUJAKU. THE AVOIDANT BEHAVIOR: part 3
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As if all that wasn’t already enough, at the end of the Re:connect, this happens. Aoba thinks to himself that this is not what Koujaku wanted, as much as Sly wants to think that it is, that he’s in the right. As if what he has done has helped the Koujaku inside, the one who’s like him, the true Koujaku, to come out. As if they could be free inside that cell.
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Koujaku reacts to Aoba’s thoughts. Sly thinks for a moment that it’s his imagination, but when Aoba repeats his thoughts, Koujaku says his name. Koujaku, who despite not having articulated a single word all this time, weeks, months, says his name as soon as Aoba “speaks”, that’s what I’m talking about when I mention their spiritual connection, that’s how strong it is. It happening after such a different sex scene, where neither of them can say no, nor show any kind of rejection, is just a reminder that they are both locked away, suffering, and that they will stay there watching this happen day after day until the day they die, not being able to see, or touch, or call each other’s names, or say “I love you” or anything they once wanted to say. They can only just watch each other wither away.
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These thoughts of “This isn’t what Koujaku wanted” are very interesting because just like Sly thought, Koujaku really wanted Aoba to accept and love him. But the last thing he wants is having Aoba reciprocate him just because that’s what Koujaku wants. He’d rather be rejected, and even die in the extreme case of the situation hurting Aoba, than having him living something he doesn’t really want, that he doesn’t feel in his heart. Giving himself to Koujaku letting him do whatever he wants without thinking twice, without thinking about his own wishes. A life that doesn’t respect Aoba’s wishes is a nightmare for him. Just like he says in the confession scene “All I can remember is that I didn’t want to touch you like that”.
I mentioned that they don’t treat the tattoo as something that changed Koujaku, but as someone else inside his mind. When Sly appears before him, Koujaku immediately knows that he’s not Aoba, but has a hard time believing it, because physically he’s the same but white. He doesn’t know what’s going on, he can’t process it, but he knows. And the thoughts that tell him that the man in front of him is not Aoba are in red, like someone else’s, with some lowercase and some uppercase, growing more intense as the madness and anger of his tattoo reflects through. Doesn’t it remind you of how Sly’s thoughts appeared in the middle of the screen when Aoba was in charge?
Sometimes I wonder what Sly’s real intention was here. In theory he wants to break Koujaku and bring out the beast because that’s the part of Koujaku that he sees himself reflected in, that destructive entity, his darkest, true side, his pure animal instinct. Exactly what Sly is.
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But he still tells the sane Koujaku that he loves him and wants to convince him that he’s Aoba. If that had worked then what would he do next? Because he truly believes that’s what he wanted to hear, and when the narration returns to his point of view he tells us that his love for Koujaku is true. Obviously locked in a cell it would be difficult for anyone to believe him, and Sly wouldn’t get him out of there anyway when he wants to keep Koujaku for himself. But then why does he keep trying to convince him, over and over again, even when Koujaku still doesn’t recognize him as Aoba any time he wakes up? Would he have been satisfied with a sane Koujaku, with those restrictions he hates, just because he accepted his words? It’s only when he sees that Koujaku won’t buy it, no matter what he tells him, that he changes his strategy.
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And it’s in this scene that we see Koujaku in control for the last time, and again the last thing he says before losing his mind is Aoba’s name. This ending makes us see how Koujaku once again enters a cycle of abuse. He has gone from being his father’s slave, to Ryuuhou’s, and now Sly’s, and he will probably never get out of that cell alive. He no longer has prayer beads protecting him, only chains imprisoning him.
Sly is aware of what he has done, and he believes that since he has destroyed Koujaku’s consciousness/spirit, it’s only fair that he is the one to destroy his body, not only fair but it even seems like an attractive idea, to die at his hands (Sly try not to be Ryuuhou challenge). I really like this dialogue where Sly tells Koujaku that he can tear off his flesh if he wants, on the condition that he stays. Staying with him, a reflection of his desire to feel loved, accepted, after so many years of abandonment. After hearing Koujaku speak back to Aoba, it must feel like a punch to the stomach to think for a moment that he’s wrong with what he’s chosen for the two of them, to think that Koujaku doesn’t really love him.
Having him locked in a cage somehow is perfect to prevent the slightest chance of Koujaku walking away, as well as keeping him in this state, unable to speak, unable to think, unable to reject him. It’s because of these things that I usually think that at least at the beginning the relationship with Koujaku in a good ending would be quite turbulent. He would like to flirt with Koujaku, but when he realizes that he really feels love for him, he feels vulnerable, weak, and needs to protect himself because the people who were supposed to always be with him and protect him, abandoned him. And Koujaku somehow “abandoned” him once too. So before exposing himself to that, he would rather push Koujaku away. Sly would always come back to him, because as much as he wants to walk away he can’t, he needs Koujaku to stay by his side. It doesn’t matter if it’s love or hate, Sly will take it because it’s intense, real and raw.
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Fun fact: Sly and Beast Koujaku both have golden eyes, when they “transform”. Everyone has those three sides of their conscience but Aoba’s just have a distinct personality and identity each, which I think might lead to thinking that beast Koujaku might have a personality of his own. I think he’s somewhere in between, he’s obviously not like them, but he’s definitely his own entity. Like some kind of natural force, like rain, wind, the energy of the cosmos, possessing him, something more abstract than a spirit or god, which we usually see as human or animal-like appearance wise.
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The first thing that strikes us when we see Aoba is that his design radically changes. When Sly takes control of his body it’s not like he suffers any physical changes, besides the shine of his eyes, however here he turns completely white. The only time we see something like that happen is when we see the true forms of Sei and Aoba, but those black marks don’t appear. This is what makes me wonder if the white color has something to do with those forms, as if it were some kind of symbolism of Sly “breaking free” and being himself, without restrictions, without Reason, but they don’t add the black marks to not spoil it, or because it looks like shit with the design, or because it simply has nothing to do with that.
The white color is the color of death, mourning, the color with which the deceased are dressed. A sterile color, without impurities, highly related to the spiritual world. Many white flowers are commonly used in funerals, usually Buddhist, such as the white chrysanthemum, used for its meaning of truth and sincerity. Aoba wears a white kimono and also gives one to Koujaku. These traditional elements could be there just to remember Koujaku but nothing in this document could ever be simple of course.
The hair of a dead person is considered to turn white after a certain period of time, meaning that the hair is no longer a source of impurities, it can't be possessed by an evil spirit, and can be transported beyond the border that marks the separation between the sacred realm of the dead and the ordinary world of the living.
His skin, his characteristic blue hair, his eyes and his clothes turn completely white because at this point Aoba is no longer there. Not in a literal sense, of course, but in a figurative sense, Aoba is dead. And this is basically the same thing that happens with Koujaku. They are both reborn, destroyed, spiritually dying so that something else can be created, the ID, the instinct of destruction, the two beasts freed from the bodies that held them prisoners.
His clothes in general resemble those of a Miko, with a more “fantastical” and sexualized appearance. This post talks about it as well. Again it’s a reference to the spiritual realm, their religious side and how Aoba/Sly is an object of devotion, of how Aoba is somewhat a channeler for Koujaku. Just like there are rituals that call the gods to our world, like I’ve said in the section about hair, which serves as a connection with gods, Aoba is the only thing that connects Koujaku with this world, the only reason why he’s still alive.
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signanothername ¡ 2 days ago
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It strickes me how feeble the action is to protect his soul in the last comic with killer and nightmare. Covering it with his shaking hands and turning bodily away, like a kid who knows they can still be easily over-powered (hands wrenched away and held down) but still tries anyway because what they are holding and wanting is important enough to offer up their meager resistance and hurt over it.
What is his life to a god anyway? Just a toy that he is playing hideaway with.
Killer's words are very firm but I know he's acutely aware of the power imbalance. It's interesting.
It's also interesting to think about his hands and what it means to use them for himself. Because killer's hands have always been nightmare's hands and to use them to protect himself gives me something something. A return of autonomy? Not quite right but sort of.
Hands do so many things and represent so many things (and show so so many things).
(This one also looks/feels a bit different than the standard model)
Context
Exactly!
Killer is absolutely fully aware Nightmare can (and usually will) just break his bones if Killer even remotely dared to stand up for himself
Not only that, but Killer is also very much fighting off his own conditioning, that’s why Nightmare says that Color undid all his “hard work”
At one point, Killer would’ve given Nightmare his own soul without resistance, not because he wants to, but because that’s what a good killing machine does for its master, cause how dare he even believe his soul even belongs to him, it never did, nor did his body either, it all belonged to Nightmare
Killer doesn’t feel his own fear, but his body shows it anyway, and now? These are his hands, his body, his soul, he won’t let Nightmare do as he pleases anymore (all while a part of him is almost automatic and would give his soul to Nightmare in a heartbeat)
It’s not just a return of autonomy, it’s fundamental understanding of his own self and gaining back control of what is rightfully his own
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cybershock24601 ¡ 15 hours ago
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Some more telanovela Rookanis ideas but now I'm thinking about Caterina who's made her peace with Rook staying in Lucanis life but still wants him to have a proper wife especially since its not like Lucanis or Rook have made any sort indication that they plan to get married anytime soon so it shouldn't be much of an issue to arrange a marriage for Lucanis while Rook stays as his mistress.
It's not like Caterina hasn't tried to arrange something for Lucanis before because she's been wanting great grandbabies to carry on the Dellamorte name for years but Lucanis simply never seemed interested. Now that Lucanis is with someone Caterina thinks there may be a chance for her to get him engaged to someone suitable for his station.
So Caterina starts reaching out to allied Houses and even some merchant princes to arrange something. Suddenly Villa Dellamorte is getting visits from different well bred girls to try their luck in catching the eye of the First Talon. It doesn't work at all. Lucanis politely refuses all their advances without even properly acknowledging their suits and even takes to making grand and public gestures of affection towards Rook in hopes of deterring them and assuring Rook that his heart still lies with her.
Rook knows Lucanis loves her and only her, has no worries about their relationship, and knows this all has to be Caterina's doing. Still, Rook is actually pretty jealous and possessive and absoutley seething about this disrecpt to her, Lucanis, and their relationship. Rook manages to keep her cool about the sitation and let Lucanis handle the situation however he sees fit but snaps when one of Lucanis' suitors says some dumb shit about not minding Rook staying around as the mistress.
There's this banter between Neve and Emmrich about a charm seller in Tevinter that is scamming people with fake magical charms. Emmrich is appalled by the danger it represents to the public and suddenly the guy is seeing and hearing things and essentially just being haunted to hell and back. Well, pretty much anyone that comes around attempting to woo Lucanis goes home suffering many of the same symptoms. Seeing things out of the corner of their eye, voices whispering and laughing about their worst secrets and insecurities, their nights filled with unending nightmares.
Anyone tries to ask Rook about the sudden uptick in hauntings and Rook plays dumb. Comes up with some vapid excuse full of jargon that any actual necromancer would spot immediately and acts so concerned about the issue but she doesn’t crack and it’s a little scary just how well Rook is able to lie to everyone’s faces because if it weren’t incredibly obvious that Rook had to be the one behind the hauntings, they’d probably believe her. Teia resolves to never get on Rook’s bad side and Viago is pondering how best to create a hallucinogenic to simulate the effects because the way Rook has crippled whole Houses with fear is inspiring. Illario is suddenly doing a whole lot to try to to get into Rook’s good books and Rook is so off put by his behavior that’s she tells him to please stop and go back to being the bitch he is, she honestly likes him better that way.
Lucanis skirts around the issue with Rook and continues to try to assure her that he loves her and only her to which Rook responds that she knows and loves him too but that doesn’t mean she’s willing to sit idly by while people disrespect the depths of their love for each other which is about as close as to a confession Rook gives. Spite asks Rook about it too on a late night after Lucanis has gone to bed and Rook’s response to him is basically “yeah” and Spite lets out the most gleeful cackle Rook’s ever heard because he is delighted by her spiteful vengeance.
The hauntings start to taper off once Lucanis’ suitors stop coming around and the girl that started all this even came to Rook to beg her to make it all stop. Rook, still pretty pissed about her comments, continued to play dumb and essentially gaslit her the whole conversation but did stop the haunting a few days later because she’s not a monster and did feel a little bad the whole situation.
In the end Caterina’s scheme backfired horribly on her as it damaged her relationship with many of the houses she reached out for and strengthened Rook’s own position in the Crows because before she was generally seen as charming, affable, a little creepy due to the whole necromancer thing, and a bit foolish due to Rook’s willingness to make herself the butt of a joke but no one really took her seriously due to mismatch of her personality and reputation as a god killer so most of the Houses assumed her feats were exaggerated, now everyone is kinda terrified of Rook and what she can do. Whereas before people might have yielded to the former First Talon when she called in a favor, now they have to consider whether it would be worth it to cross scary necromancer Rook to do so. Rook basically ends up with a reputation amongst the Crows intimidating enough to match with the Demon of Vyrantium.
During and after this Rook probably gets a few letters from the Necropolis mostly from Emmrich, Myrna, and Vorgoth as they definitely heard about the uptick in hauntings in Antiva and every single one of those letter essentially amounted to asking Rook “really?” to which Rook replied “yes and I feel perfectly justified in doing so” but in more words and without ever outright admitting to her actions.
It’s also after all this that Lucanis officially asks Rook to marry him, something they had been holding off on because they wanted to spend some time finding their footing in their relationship before jumping into the craziness of planning a wedding. Lucanis doesn’t want anyone thinking he isn’t serious about Rook after everything that just happened and Rook gets her chance for revenge against Caterina because now she’s going to have to contend with Vorgoth in the wedding planning process. Vorgoth has been putting together a binder of all their wedding ideas for Rook for years and is very excited to finally be able to execute them.
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chrystal-ink ¡ 1 day ago
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Shadow X GN Reader
Intertwined
Based off of one of my favorite Dodie songs Shadow has a nightmare and you comfort him back to sleep lot of hurt/comfort with lots of sweet cuddles.
-Enjoy
It was his thrashing that woke you up. with the sheer amount of trauma it was never a bother to you, his nightmares. you were used to them at this point it. Still seeing the love of your life suffer at the chaos in his own mind made your heart break just as much as the first time you saw it.
you learned to proceed with caution, waking him up prematurely could cause him further confusion which would only make the situation worse. sometimes as much as your hand pressed against his back was enough to calm him down no waking up necessary. unfortunately, tonight was not one of those nights.
Shadow bolted upright out of bed letting out a cry of agony his eyes shot open as tears began to stream soaking his face and dripping onto the bedsheets below.
"Hey, hey, hey, I'm here it's okay." you leaped into action speaking gently as you made your way into his line of vision. "Take a deep breath it was just a dream. you're safe, I promise."
Shadow obeyed as you gently cupped his face wiping the tears from his eyes. He was shaking whatever he was dreaming about really must have messed with his head.
you wrapped your arms around him attempting to steady him. he buried his face in the crook of your neck wrapping his arms tightly around you, as if you were to disappear if he let go.
You waited for him to speak. It always took him a moment to collect his thoughts after a particularly bad nightmare.
"Are you sure you're safe with me?" He finally broke the silence.
"What? Of course I am, What makes you think that?"
"I know that people want me for my power, they can't hurt me, they know that, but what's keeping them from hurting you? Eggman he took you, tortured you, and let you die in front of me. all while I was powerless to stop him."
"That's not going to happen Shadow."
"How do you know?"
"Because, You won't let it, and neither will I, you trained me to protect myself remember?"
"yah but-"
"There will always be a but my love. Being with you, being with anyone really, there is always some sort of risk. I chose you and will continue to choose you despite those risks. Not because I don't care about them, but because every second you're in my life it makes all of those risks worth it. Feel this." You placed his hand on your chest so he could feel your pulse. "I'm still here, see? and you're here with me, which means no matter what even if an enemy crashes through that door right now I am still safe because were together."
"I still worry about you."
"I know, and I'm grateful just relax and lay with me for now, tell me everything I want to hear it you don't have to go through it alone.
You laid down, Shadow following suit placing his head on your chest so he could hear your heart beat, the rhythmic thumping calming him as he wrapped himself around you.
'Skin. Heat. Hair in your mouth, feet touching feet. you and I, safe from the world, though the world will try.'
you stroked the top of his head feeling him melt into you as your hand moved along his silky quills.
"You know you're the only one who can do that right?" He commented
You giggled "Yah, I Know"
You felt him smile against you.
'Numb, Fine, You create the rarity of my genuine smile. So breathe, breathe with me.'
Shadow began telling you about his nightmare, all the horrible details of an event that would never come to pass. He told you about the anxiety he felt when he couldn't find you. how he hated himself for letting you get hurt even though it was just a dream. he didn't want his mind to go there it just did on it's own.
'Can you drink all my thoughts cause I can't stand them'
Shadow wrapped himself around you further, as if he were trying to merge your bodies together, so you would never have to be apart again.
"I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you on my watch, I can't lose you, not in the way I lost everyone else."
"I know dear, that's why I won't let it happen."
'Intertwined. Free. I've pinned each and every hope on you, i hope that you don't bleed with me.'
the more shadow talked the more at ease you felt him become, his grip loosened on you as his muscles relaxed, his head grew heavy against you easing you into a relaxed state as well.
When he was done you thanked him for telling you everything, you reassured him that everything would be fine, as long as the two of you worked as a team which seemed to comfort him.
'I'm afraid of the things in my brain. but we can stay here and laugh away the fear'
you hummed mindlessly as you stroked Shadows head lulling him to sleep, you followed suit not long after. The rest of the night was silent as the two of you slept in each other's arms, fighting off whatever nightmares came your lover's way.
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thesleepyfable ¡ 3 days ago
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~ SWTD: Still Here AU Season 2 Part 4: ~
Farther and Son:
So, I'm back at work full-time now that Christmas is over, and I'm not sure how often chapters will be posted. Hopefully, once a week.
Tw: Coma.
'What did the doctors say?'
'They put Tommy through the Scale Assessment,' Jennifer explained with tears running down her face and smearing her makeup. 'Fifteen is mild. Three, you're practically brain-dead.' She paused. Her shoulders twitched. Jennifer whimpered. Addair wrapped an arm around her shoulder, and without a second thought, she nestled into him and began to weep. 'He only scored a seven.'
Addair's body went cold. His heart stopped. His eyes widened, and he, too, began to cry. He was going to lose his eldest son, who had just finished his GCSEs and wanted to join the Army, was now fixed to a hospital bed and being fed through a tube. The man looked at his hand, where skin was peeling from his palm and fingers from a lifetime of manual labour. They were unsightly to look at, even before his infection, but they carried so many memories.
Tommy's birth came to mind. He remembered the day he was born. When he was able to hold him in his hands. Only six pounds with a small tuft on blonde hair. Addair, who was already balding, joked about how they had matching hairstyles.
The happiest day of his life. Today, a nightmare.
'What is that, Sarge?'
'I don't know.'
'What should we do?'
'I don't know.'
Possibly the only pair of police officers in the village, followed Addair from the safety of their car. Addair didn't acknowledge them and just kept moving forward. He only had one destination, and nothing was going to stop him.
Braemar looked like a ghost town. Addair's arrival caused everyone to hide in their homes and lock the doors. But, they were curious, especially the children. Nothing happened in a place that had a population of less than a thousand people. Eyes watched Addair from the windows with a mix of awe and fear. They had no idea what he was. But they had realised he wasn't giving anyone a moments notice. He didn't try and climb over the buildings to make a quick exit or sink his tendrils into pavement, but instead, he moved lightly, which made him slow. To the locals, he looked like a monster, but he didn't act like one.
Thankfully, Addair was moving so slowly that Caz and Roy easily caught up in the car. Roy pulled up, allowing Caz to jump out and dash down the icy pavement. Why didn't the council put grit out?
Caz didn't need to sense Addair. He could see the English cunt turning down to the right. He was just following the main road out of town. Not even thinking about the police, Caz ran past them. His foot lost its grip, and he collided with a lamp-post but quickly found his balance and pushed himself up.
'Addair?!' He stopped, turned, and stared down at Caz. 'Addair, what the fuck are you doing?' He didn't answer. Caz felt his anger rising. 'Don't just stare at me. Answer my fuckin' question. You think you can just wander off and go wherever the fuck you want-'
'I'm going to see my son!'
'You just saw your sons!'
'Tommy,' Addair snapped. 'I'm going to see Tommy!'
Caz's face fell. The 'dream' came creeping back into his mind. He replayed it in his head, and the pieces fell into place. It wasn't a dream. It wasn't a memory. That was Addair's thoughts. How he thought that day played out. Caz, somehow, in his sleep, saw into his mind.
'He could die, and you want me to hide away in the middle of bum-fuck nowhere?!' Now knowing his name and that he can talk, the locals listened. They were curious. 'I don't care what I look like, and I don't care what they think. My face could be on the front of every newspaper, but nothing is stopping me from seeing him.'
Caz didn't reply. He was shocked. As much as he didn't like Addair, his feelings were justified because if he was in his position, Caz would do the same. He'd end the world for his girls. If being infected meant Cait and Maidie would be safe, he'd jump head first into the mass. He was one of the crew members who didn't know about Tommy.
'So,' the younger police officer stepped out of the car, along with the Sarge. They didn't get close. 'There's more of you lot?'
'No.'
'But he has a son?'
'He's human.'
'He is?'
'Yes.'
'What the fuck happened?'
'Long story. Look,' Caz sighed. He rubbed the bridge of his nose. 'I'll take care of this, and we'll get out of your way, aye?'
'Aye,' the Sarge was quick to reply. He was an older man who clearly didn't want any change in his village. 'Just go before some eejit newspaper gets here.'
Addair turned to leave. Caz quickly grabbed what he could of his arm.
'No.'
'Didn't you just-'
'If you want to go to London, then you're not walking there, and you're not going by yourself.' There was a pause as Addair's face softened, then he slowly formed a smile. He really wasn't going to get away from Caz or anyone from Beria. This really was his new reality.
'Prick,' he chuckled.
Roy's finger tapped the steering wheel with a cigarette tightly pursed between his lips, waiting for something to go wrong. He audibly sighed when Caz got back into the car with Addair following, but he kept his guard up when he saw the police. He wasn't insured to drive, and as much as he loved Caz, he wasn't going to join him in jail.
'Alright?'
'Yeah,' Caz groaned. 'I think we're-'
The car rattled. Addair wrapped a tendril around the vehicle and hoisted it in the air, and began walking back for the farm.
'Addair, you fuckin' cunt, we can drive!' He didn't answer and just kept walking. 'I know you can hear me, Addair. Addair - Oh, Jesus Christ...!'
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cookieofearthbread ¡ 4 months ago
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He not even sure how to respond with the eating.
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melatien ¡ 11 months ago
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tiny yoichi (unwillingly) lures out soldiers by being his helplessness little self so his brother can strike
#bases are the most reliable way to find food afo found!#yoichi is crying bcuz he pitys them <3#not because hes nervous#im gonna be honest i made this idea up on the spot when drawing this#pewdiepies new art video awakened something in me I NEEDED TO REMIND MYSELF I CAN STIL DRAW BANGERS TOO#i didnt disappoint myself!!!! competitiveness is my enemy and my bestie literally#anyways his right eye was an absolute horrendous nightmare to draw it was going so well until i did the hair then it ruined the eye#i actually thought yoichi was wearing shoes at this age but then i looked back at those chapters and realised yoichi was shoeless#WITH ONLY A BANDAGE ON HIS FOOT??!?!!?!? agony#can yoichi not make me wish he had something good in life for ONE SECOND#think of this as like how he responded to afo killing those people that (presumably) beat yoichi up beforehand#we dont know if hes crying because his brother is killing or if he was crying before being 'saved'#ill try do some fluff art soon ive been really interested in body horror related art lately so i wanted to play around!!!#i have a BUNCH of ideas written down ive yet to do#i just keep doing whatever i feel like#i am the master of ignoring the instructions and winging it#mha#my art#yoichi shigaraki#one for all#my hero academia#first ofa user#shigaraki yoichi#mha yoichi#tiny yoichi#tiny yoichi in his shabby little clothes#ive actually been dying to draw tiny yoichi again but KIDS ARE SO HARD TO DRAW!!!!!#i had an art moment though#HALLEJUHAH#art gods had my back fr
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mira0000000-blog ¡ 1 month ago
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Ugh..narrator...
#slay princess spoilers in these tags alex don readdd#i should be sleeping rn but while i was work i couldnt stop thinking abt#how much i feel like the narrator relates to me in how ocd affects me#hes not just afraid of change hes afraid of possibility. but thats not what he thinks hes afraid of he justifies his fear as#wanting to protect the world from seein death ever again#but in truth he wants to kill the embodiment of change itself#my mind is hazy but like i can get it because so many times i just hope that#things just stop#because i think abt so many possibilities so bad that it hurts me a lot#only thinking about the bad possibitilies and the good possibilities never go through my mind#i think so much abt everything that could happen if i do anything that i try my best at avoiding it#and if i fall into not doing it feels empty and stagnant#its safe but it feels really bad and i feel bad abt my fear#and thats what the narrator wants for the full scope of the world cos he thinks that will be better for everyone#dont get me wrong hes very wrong lol but hes so human at the same time#it only gets more clear by his nightmare where he describes that every good moment in life is a short omen for something horrible to happen#next#thats so ocd to me man “oh fuck this is too good something bad will happen”#bitch should have gone to therapy instead of trapping the gods of reality itself trapped in a torture bubble lol#or he should have played satbk#sonic is always right#also i get a lot of ocd vibes from the cage but its slightly different#she thinks she already knows whats going to happen and doesnt try to test another possibility#the only way to save her is to prove to her that what she thinks will happen isnt set in stone. she cant know what will happen#even if her past trauma feels like enough proof that things will be the same- she cant know...#also how she thinks her body is acting on its own and that it has nothing to do with her but it does she just cant see it#cage....#also i love how she comes from prisoner. because prisoner is actually very reasonable in her distrust of you but she believes that her plan#will work#but it doesnt and it turns into the trsuma that turns her in cage cos every worry feels like its the truth
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digitaldiseas3 ¡ 4 days ago
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.
#go ahead and ignore this lol just gonna be word vomit or something idk yet#but. i was listening to past life by tame impala and it’s not totally synonymous to my experience#but it’s close enough that it makes me think of it yknow?#anyway. it’s been roughly a year and a half now since i had that dream#and i don’t think of it as often as i used to#but i still grieve him yknow#and half the time when i try talking to a guy on hinge or go on a date or whatever#there’s part of me that just thinks. man. what if he’s out there#what if this guy is actually him? it’s not like i remember anything about him beyond his hair color anyway#(and even then i really don’t remember that… i only remember being surprised that id fallen in love with a blond.#i have no recollection of what kind of blond he was. the length or texture or proper color. nothing.#i could even swear he had started out brunet before the dream really solidified itself (for lack of better term))#but anyway it’s just. i do still miss him#i do still think he was some sort of soulmate to me#and i so desperately want him to be real. to be out there somewhere even if i can’t find him yet#i just dream that one day i’ll be in a serious relationship with someone#and they’ll confess to me that once#a very long time ago#they had a dream that was so vivid it could have been real#and that they think i was there. and they describe what little they remember of this nightmare#and it lines up perfectly with the dream i had#and we have this moment of epiphany that we finally found each other. and we both remember it and it was real#and for all the time we spent hurting#it’s finally all worth it because we found each other somehow#i want this more than i can describe. it’s unfathomable#and at the same time i know how unrealistic it is. life isn’t some fairytale like that#logically i know it was probably just some crazy dream that turned into a genuine delusion#but i can’t fully face that concept yet. i’ve tried but eventually i come back to the pain and the comfort of believing#i just miss him#and it’s hard not knowing exactly what i miss
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starbuck ¡ 11 months ago
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i can’t remember if i ever actually made the Ravenous Ghost Bell analysis post, but i wish i had time to make it because i feel like it would be received well in this moment…
#i mean… tldr: ghosts are real in Ravenous#mostly in the heads of the people who ate them#both to harass them in nightmares but also to influence their physical actions#(usually as an echo of something they themselves did in life)#there are COUNTLESS examples of this - which i will give the highlights of when i actually DO make the post#but there’s specifically a moment in the final Boyd-Ives showdown where a bell is rung#and we don’t see who rang it but it causes Boyd to focus and draws him to the barn where he sees the bear trap and is Inspired#and we can presume that the bear trap was Reich’s idea (based on that deleted bear trap shooting scene that i made the gifset of)#but then WHO rang the bell??#obviously it is implied to (and must have been) Ives#but why did he do it?#to get Boyd’s attention - naturally… sounds like him#he knows that time is ticking… wants to lure Boyd to his trap#BUT the thing is that Ives ate Reich too#and i feel like (being a long-time cannibal with no moral compass) he is probably Less influenced by the people he eats than Boyd is#but i also like to think that - in that moment - Reich subconsciously influenced him to do it#because - notably - Reich was the one who rung that bell the last time he left Fort Spencer - he’s the only character we see so it#so like. tldr again: ghosts are Real in Ravenous and Reich’s ghost rung the bell in that scene#to help Boyd focus and lead him to the solution that would give him the upper hand in the conflict to defeat Ives#and someday i will write ALL of that up properly - but it’s just SO good and i love to talk about it#so here i am#ghostposting the night away…#not tagging this because i want the REAL analysis to get notes whenever i post that#but feel FREE to chat with me about this if you see it!#i love Ravenous and i miss talking about it#i have SO much to say lol
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oozeandgoo-art ¡ 7 months ago
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everyone is sooo in love with vakori on account of le is so cool and smart and deeply pragmatic and is also completely batshit insane
#oc#monochrome#sketch#velan#vakori#rocaim#rocaim and vakori are rex and taz and adder and silas's parents#adder and silas get their looks from vakori; rex and taz to a slightly lesser degree get it from rocaim#rex specifically is like a sharper clone of him. fucks velan up all the time because their personalities are completely totally different#rocaim was very like. gentle and understanding. good with kids and well-liked by basically everyone. a very effective mediator#rex is obviously none of those things lmao. every time he says something particularly insensitive it surprises her for like six years runni#anyway rocaim is in love wtih vakori. velan is in love with vakori. vakori is aro as they come but insanely pragmatic#like. ok le's based loosely off my ex. like. so le's SCARY pragmatic. so fucking cool about it everyone with a brain is specifically like#'woag oh my god le's so pragmatic im in love with her'. anyway eventually le's like 'hi rocaim. here are the objective reasons that i think#that if we got married it would mean i had better standing and more power in the organization we're both committed to. would you be#opposed to possibly getting married with me on the grounds that it would get me respect and power' and rocaim. who is already head over#heels for ler specifically because le makes these kinds of decisions and sees with this kind of logic is like. Absolutely. 100%#then for the next four years of their formal engagement people keep taking rocaim aside and being like hey... i have bad news...#...that leya you're engaged to... le's not romantically interested in you the same way you're romantically interested in ler... le only#wants you because you're an Ath and le wants a voice in the interclan meetsings... and then when Rocaim is like yeah i know#thats why i want to marry ler isnt that like the sexiest fucking reasoning you've EVER heard. no one gets it but velan#who is also in love with ler for the same reasons but has no such claims to power#and who also is not equipped for a polycule nor willing to try to go behind rocaim's back because unfortunately for her. she is also in lov#with rocaim. me when im in love with my friend and my friend's wife and also i'm pretty sure they both reciprocate but they're both#married and i dont really know what to do about it and also all three of us are very Traditional and that is not the Tradition:#and then they both die and she never quite deals with that.#but she DOES get to raise their (surviving) kids :) most of whom are fucking nightmares#life is so difficult for velan. like actually#closerverse#cv
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whatareyoudoingwithamaserati ¡ 10 months ago
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I think PrinceZam should be put in a saw trap. Not that it’d be good for him just that it would force him to either confront the worst of his mortality and all of his fears and force him to reckon with the parts of himself that he continually tries to deny. Or die trying
#my brain put me in The Torment Nexus last night for five consecutive nightmares in a row so I’m coping by figuring out what kind of trap#would force Zam into acknowledging all the worst parts of him#(gesturing vaguely at my brain) you put ME in saw traps?!!!???? I’m gonna put ZAM in one#this is also partially inspired by holland’s ASDOM saw au because it goes crazy hard#I’m thinking that the best trap for him would be one where he has to choose between being selfish (saving himself)#or selfless (saving someone else) BUT it can’t be a simple decision. he needs to be forced to run through the cowardly and catastrophizing#thought patterns that have guided him this far (heavy s4 inspiration) with a side of severe mind games#I think for that reason the bathroom from the original saw film would work well but that is too much mind game not enough hands on death#but the reverse bear trap would also work to drive home the significant physical threat there needs to be#thinking……. thinking……..#no drawn out conclusions yet but god . this is an AU I wojld really want to work with if I had the spoons and time#ohhhh perhaps he is a paranoid shutin after ruining the only friendship he’s ever had (reporting severe academic violations? perhaps) and#the whole pont is to force him to find a way to throw his full faith into doing what’s right (IE: grievous bodily harm / death) or choose#the coward’s way out becaude he cannot stand the consequences of his actions (death again but this time his own)#cats.writes#she life on my steal till i
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devotedlystrangewizard ¡ 2 years ago
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thinking gabriel thoughts (again)
#the guy who cut down minos without a second thought is the same guy who was the only angel to care about the ferrymen. fucking dies#his terminal entry literally says hes popular in heaven because of his radiant personality. he does nothing but insult v1 in 3-2#get you a man who can do both#minos swears revenge on him while the ferryman literally worships him.#the skeleton in 1-4 who is worshipping him even after their life is long gone and the mural in 4-3 with traitor written over it#he looms over the narrative even when hes not there#he encourages even those in hell to Be Good and Have Faith but destroyed minos for trying to make a better life#different characters have extremely different views of him and all of them make sense!#heaven's specialest little boy can be hell's worst nightmare. as a treat#i also think about minos a lot by extension#i was just chilling on the wiki when i got hit with the 'he thought it unreasonable that people were punished for loving' and cried#like even as someone whos aroallo. it got to me!#it also raises the question of how much homosexuality is part of that. to me#is heaven ultrakill homophobic. discuss#i mean they do have Major bisexual lighting. in lust.#yeah sure theyre in hell hell is eternal punishment but he really was just. trying to make a peaceful existence#also the sisyphean insurrectionist lore fucked me up a little#ultrakill on the surface looks so simple but then you open up the wiki and its 'yeah the ferrymen tore their own flesh off their bones'#'king minos attempted to make a peaceful civilization in the lust layer and was killed for it but he lingered bc hes op'#'yeah actually the sisyphean insurrectionists are like that because the angels took away everything they didnt need for the punishment'#and you just have to live with that information now. you wont go back to blissful ignorance. you cant.#or thats just on me for taking lore too seriously. v1 doesnt care
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tacagen ¡ 2 years ago
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can we talk about how wrong the finish line ending is. can we talk about how barry sees snapping thawne's neck as their point of no return when thawne directly expressed hope barry can still live up to his idealised expectations several times and even spoke of how exactly he can achieve that. can we talk about how barry while having the best intentions fucks with thawne's speed and timeline resetting him to a humble curator with no powers and makes their situation a THOUSAND times worse when thawne comes back as reverse-flash because that reset is a direct and ultimate confirmation of barry's desire to forget thawne and make it like he never existed (the very thing that motivates thawne to mess with barry at all, the very thing he went insane about and which led him to becoming reverse-flash) and how thats similar to creation of the flashpoint which was done with good intentions and changed the world forever even after being undone. can we talk about how it also resembles lobotomy as in permanently fucking up persons brain and its necessary functions to make them more calm and controllable in their mental illness instead of actually helping them which takes a lot more time thought and effort and how that was a quick and seemingly effective but inherently destructive solution. can we talk about how barry by taking away eobard's powers also takes his freedom from societal expectations and standards of his time he clearly didnt fit in and 25th century in general. can we talk about how barry also took the only good memories thawne ever had aka their moments together and especially their first meeting which thawne saw as perfect and held very dearly just like any other interaction with barry including the reverse era ones. can we talk about how fucking intrusive, invalidating and selfish is the whole concept of erasing any kind of memories from another persons brain, no matter how hurtful or bad or self-sabotaging those can be especially involuntarily and how only the said person should have control over that because that is their damn life. can we talk about what such betrayal will do to a man who previously became the reverse-flash just because of one single phrase that he thought was something special only between him and barry. can we talk about how this time thawne paradoxically didnt even do anything to deserve that because he never met barry and never had such possibility in the first place. can we t
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