#But I'll just go to pretend everything's fine I guess
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activesplooger · 1 day ago
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I have a special request if you’re up for it
summary: you and Adam have this mutual attraction towards each other, but the main reason you won’t take the first step is because you know how high his sex drive is, which wouldn’t be too much of a problem if you weren’t so vanilla. You liked tenderness, praise, gentle touches, and you just don’t entirely trust him to be very accommodating.
do with this what you will, please and thank you
thanks for the request! this prompt was amaze! <33
sorry it took so long for me to do this its been a hectic week (america core)
hope you like how this turned out :]
__
You and Adam were... complicated, to say the least. Having been friends with Eve, you've heard all about his "inadequacies" in Eden. You thought he was this vile, cocky, arrogant asshole with no redeeming qualities. And then you met, and yeah that's pretty accurate. But, alas, there was an instant attraction.
Eve took you out a few weeks ago to a party hosted by Heaven's elite, a party you'd usually never attend on account of being a lower class angel. So many of Heaven's highest powers were there: seraphims, arch angels, virtues- and the first man himself, Adam. Eve scoffed as he approached, the colossal angel striding up with a cocky grin.
He was beautiful; rugged features, a messy fluff of hair, a nice smile- truly the man. For a moment, you were infatuated... and then he had to open his mouth. The cocky angel bends down to meet face to face with you, "Eve, who's the babe?". Eve rolls her eyes, "No, Adam.". "Fuck do you mean "No"," He says in a mocking voice.
Straightening his posture, he scoffs, his full stature towering over yours. "I mean no, you're not gonna 'cum 'n go' with this one," she asserts sternly. "Cum and go?" he feigns innocence, "I would never-". Before he could finish his sentence, Eve cuts him off, "Adam, I've told her everything about you and us, she's smarter than to get with someone like you". He groans, "Ugh! God dammit! You're such a cock-block Eve!".
Eve's head snaps to the entrance of the party, watching as a tall blonde woman walks in. "Lillith!" she exclaims, beginning to walk in her direction. Shit, was she gonna leave you with this dickhead? You grab her arm and pull her back to you, "Don't you dare leave me-". She smiles softly and chuckles, "C'mon, you're smart enough not to fall for his crap. You can deal with him for a few minutes, I'll be back before you know it!". "But-" you try to protest but she had already strode halfway across the room. Pivoting back towards Adam, your once again met with his smug gaze.
"So," he steps closer to you, "this party blows. I get cock blocked and both my ex-wives show up? Lame.". He grabs you chin and lifts it, "Wanna get out of here?". "What? No!" you respond, a bit offended at the implication. Adam removes his hands off you and holds them up in a gesture of surrender, "Alright, sugartits. Heard you loud and clear. Guess I'm just gonna go and leave you allll alo-". He turns around and pretends to leave, trying to coerce you into leaving with him. "Wait!" you call out. Eve was the really the only other person you knew and she had left and you hate being alone.
He turns on his heels slowly to face you, the ever-present smug look plastered on his face, "Oh? What was that?". You huff and avoid eye contact, "Fine. Let's gooOOOO-". He grabs you by the arm before you an continue and yanks you along as he shoves through the crowd of angels. Usually, this isn't your thing. But, you naively figured you guys would just make out behind the building or something for a bit.
And just like you had thought, Adam takes you out back and presses you against the wall, crashing his lips against yours in a heated kiss. It took you a minute to adjust to his feverent pace, trying to match the same energy that he put into his embraces. His tongue invades your mouth, pushing its way past your lips without permission. Entangling his tongue with yours, soft moans escape your lips.
His hands snake their way under your shirt, kneading your breasts through your bra softly. Okay, this was escalating really fast- As he goes to undo your bra clasp, you pull back and try to pry his arms off you. You chuckle nervously, "Uh let's maybe slow down a bit...". He looks back with his eyebrow quirked up, a confused look on his face,"Huh? What do you mean "too fast"?".
The angel chuckles in a taunting manner, "Wait? What'd you think we were gonna do back here?". "I-I don't know, make out?" you reply. "Look, Babe, I'm looking to screw," he pokes a finger between a hole he made in his hand while wiggling his eyebrows, "I'm not here to share feelings or snuggle. Got it?". He leans in for another kiss but you stop him by pressing the palm of your hand to his lips, "Yeah, I'm gonna pass.".
Adam scoffs and pulls back, crossing his arms over his broad chest arrogantly, "Fine, your loss anyway.". "Bye, Adam," you say with a sigh as you walk away. "Fine, bitch," he mutters.
__
Since that day, you and Adam have had many encounters, each one identical to the last. He'd hit on you, you'd reject him, and he'd act clueless as to why. Although the attraction is surely there, it would never work between the two of you. Adam's high sex drive could never work for your vanilla self, and there's no way in Hell Adam would ease up on fucking for even a day, let alone for the duration of a relationship. Besides, it's not like he's looking for anything serious.
One day, you run into Adam again in the promenade. The two of you get to talking, laughing, flirting - the usual. He makes and advance, and you reject him, just like every other time. But this time, he snaps. The angel throws his hands up in the air, "I don't fucking get it! You always do this shit!". "Heheh, oh Adam I'm just gonna flirt with you and then totally leave you high and dry! Hehe!" he says, mocking your voice. "That's really what you think I'm doing?" you narrow your eyes at him. He scoffs, "Oh be fucking real! You're such a tease!". "A tease? You're just pissed because I don't want to fuck you!"
He looks at you incredulously, "Do you know how insane you sound?!". "Are you serious? Whatever, I'm out," you turn to walk away. He grabs your forearm and effortlessly pulls you back to face him, "Excuse me? Did I say we were fucking done here?". You try to pry your arm away from him, however, it's pointless against his relentless grip, "Let go, Adam.". "No," he states firmly, hand engulfing your arm tightly, "I wanna know why you're rejecting me.".
You exhale sharply and run a hand down your face in exasperation, "Look, you're a nice- well- you're and okay guy, Adam. We have good chemistry it's just...". "It's just what?" he questions roughly. "It's just that your sex drive is so fucking high! I don't want that, I wan't a relationship with love and tenderness-". "That's fucking dumb," he interrupts. "Exactly! We want different things, so let me go!".
Adam's eyes widen, shocked at the thought of you leaving, "What? No! I can be tender! I prommy! C'mon give me a chance.". "Pft," you chuckle, "not falling for that.". "Falling for what? I can be a real fuckin' romantic!".
"Yeah, right," you chuckle, unconvinced by his promises. "Babe," he grabs your smaller hands in his large one, "one date, that's all I ask! And if it doesn't rock your world then you'll never hear from me again.". You hesitate for a moment. Never hearing Adam's nagging sounds great, plus he'd probably take you out somewhere nice... A heavy sigh escapes your lips, "One date. Somewhere nice, bring flowers.".
"You got it, sugartits!"
__
Adam followed up on his promise. He texted you to be ready at 5 tomorrow and wear something nice. You didn't know where he would be taking you, he'd simply state that "its a surprise".
The following day, the clock struck 5 and you immediately heard a knock on the door. Swinging the door open, Adam leaned against the door frame with the biggest bouquet of flowers your've ever seen. "These are for you, obviously," he holds out the extensive amount of flowers to you. Taking them in your hand, you examine the flower choice, "Jonquils and white roses, fitting.". "Oh really I hadn't noticed," he mutters, feigning innocence.
"Uh huh," you eye him up and down, surprised at his formal attire. He ditched the robe, instead, he dawned a white suit with lavender and gold accents akin to his usual robe colors. Though, he still wore his exterminator mask. The angel notices your gaze on him and wiggles his eyebrows, "Like what you see?". "Could be better," you state flatly. He scrunches his eyebrows, an offended look on his face, "Better? How?!". Reaching out, you lift the mask off him, "Much better, now I can actually see you.". He turns his head away bashfully, muttering, "yeah, okay, whatever," under his breath as his face heats up.
__
The two of you arrive at the destination, a beautiful garden-esque restaurant that's completely cleared out. "Woah, this is gorgeous," you state, in awe at the scenery. A cocky grin spreads across Adam's face, "Like it? Being the first man has its perks, I had the whole place cleared out just for us.".
"Its, wow," you walk in further, admiring the set up. The restaurant's walls are covered in vines and flowers, fairy lights hanging from beamed ceiling. A dim glow casts around place, a surprisingly warm atmosphere in the cold outside air. Adam grabs your waist gently and guides you to your table. Roses pave the walkway to your seating, waiters on standby holding wine. Adam pulls your chair out for you to sit, pushing your chair in for you once your sat.
"I have to say, I'm pleasantly surprised at this," you state. "Oh yeah?" he smirks, "told I could be romantic and shit.". You take a sip of your wine and chuckle, "Well, your doing a great job of it so far.". "Oh, yeah?" Adam leans in and whispers in a husky low tone, "how good? Good enough to give me a thank-you-fuck after?".
"Nope," you reply flatly. "God damn it!" he throws his hands up in the air in frustration. You laugh and check the time on your phone, "Look at that, you lasted an hour without bringing up sex! That's your best record.". He scoffs, a soft smile involuntarily spreading across his face, "Yeah whatever, fuckin' prude.". __
You two share a nice dinner, the food was phenomenal and the conversation was pretty good. Getting to know Adam was actually interesting, at least for the parts he would open up about. He pays for the meal and leads you outside, the cool air causing you to shiver. Adam kindly offers his jacket out to you. "Thanks," you grab the jacket and slide it over your shoulders, the oversized fabric offering extra warmth across your body.
You take his hand as you walk through the streets of heaven, the action taking him by surprise for a moment. He regains his composure and intertwines his fingers with yours tightly, pulling you to his side.
The walk back to your place is comfortably quiet, just the two of you enjoying the calm atmosphere. Once you arrive to your place, you stand by the door as you say your goodbyes, "Tonight was really fun, Adam.". You move closer to him, expecting a kiss from him before you part ways.
He avoids eye contact, not responding to you, an uncharacteristically shy demeanor suddenly creeping up. "Adam? Helloo?" you try to get his attention by waving your hands in front of him, yet, you get no response. Exhaling sharply, you grab his face and force him to make eye contact with you, "Are you gonna kiss me or what?!".
"I'm trying but now you've got me all weird and nervous!" he finally says, his face now beet red. "Me?! It's not like we haven't kissed before," you respond defensively. "Not like this! It didn't mean anything before," he trails off, his words getting softer. He sighs, running a hand down his face, "Nobody meant anything before, but you do. And now I'm getting all sappy and gross, can't even fucking kiss you without feeling all anxious and shit! See what you do to me?! I shouldn't have ever-". Reaching up on your tippy toes, you cut him off with a soft kiss. He shuts his eyes and leans into it, wrapping his arms around your waist as he deepens the kiss. His eyebrows knit together, focused on the tender moment before him.
You try to pull back from the kiss to get some air, however, Adam whines and pulls you back in. Chuckling against his lips, your hands run through his soft brown locks of hair. He trails his lips down to your neck where he nuzzles into you, holding you in a firm embrace. "Don't even think about telling people about this," his says, words muffled against your neck.
"'Bout what? You being a big sap?" you tease. "Shut the fuck up," he mutters. "I'm kidding!" you chuckle, lifting his head off your shoulder to see him, "I hope we can do this again sometime.". The angel smiles softly, pulling away from you and standing up straight, "I'll see you soon then. Night.".
"Night."
He walks away from your doorstep, occasionally looking back at you to make sure you got in okay, already planning your next date in his head the whole way home.
The End <3 __
i love this prompt!!! very me core. i know i talk my freaky lil shit on here but im all talk. im very touch averse unless your on my mentally approved list of people that can touch me, and yet my love language is physical touch or something idfk guys anyway im gonna stop rambling
anyWHOOO, Jonquils and white roses have cute lil flower meanings btw :]
Jonquils: rebirth, new beginnings, and hope
White Roses:  loyalty, purity, and innocence
all the things adam was trying to come off as lol
to requester: thanks for the prompt darling! :]
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darkmatilda · 1 day ago
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╰┈➤ the pumpkin reaper
epilogue
previous parts:
1 2 3
in which you and reid are visiting your brother in hospital after he tried to commit a suicide
tw: mention of a suicide attempt
contents: spender reidxfem!bau!reader, it's an epilogue, please check the previous parts if you missed them!
words: 3.1k
You couldn’t believe those words came out of your mouth, but they did. And what’s more, they were sincere.
It was late in the evening when you were heading back to the office in Quantico. No case ever ended with just catching the unsub – after that came the long hours of report writing and paperwork. After everything you’d been through, the team almost forbade you from taking on that task. Instead, they insisted that you go straight home and get some proper rest.
You rolled your eyes and nodded, like a child whose mother insists they zip up their jacket. Hotch was nowhere to be seen, Morgan was listening to music with his eyes closed, Emily and JJ were absorbed in their conversation, and Rossi… well, Rossi was doing whatever it is Rossi does. So, you reached for the case files and tucked yourself away in a quiet corner of the jet. You wanted to go over everything again, even though you knew that as soon as you saw Logan's photo, all the unpleasant memories would come rushing back with relentless force.
 But before you could open the folder to the first page, someone simply took it from your hands. You looked up to see none other than Reid—blue shirt, sleeves rolled halfway up, a look of perpetual sleeplessness, his usual worry, and… joy. Small, but noticeable.
You, too, were almost disturbingly happy. Escaping death filled you with a mood akin to the high after smoking two joints back-to-back. Of course, it would only last for a brief moment; by tomorrow, you’d likely be tossing and turning in bed, plagued by nightmares. A familiar pattern.
"I don’t even want to see you trying to work right now," Spencer said, taking a seat next to you and placing the folder beside him, just out of your reach. Or at least far enough that you’d have to put in some serious effort to grab it—and your sore ribs had no intention of letting you do that.
"Then what do you suggest I do?" you asked, rolling your eyes. "I don't want to sleep."
"Kafka on the Shore?" he suggested.
"I've already read it. By the way, what was the deal with the soldiers and the hut in the woods at the very end?"
"Well, that's an element that leaves a lot of room for personal interpretation."
"Thanks for the explanation, that told me a lot," you chuckled. You pulled your knees to your chest, trying to get more comfortable in your spot, but the movement triggered a wave of pain. You hissed.
“They should have kept you in the hospital for at least one night,” Reid said, suddenly straightening up. “Do you need anything? There might be some ice around… or I could just leave, and you could lie down…”
“No. You’re staying,” you decided firmly. He raised an eyebrow at your abrupt response. You quickly followed up with an explanation. “Well, I’ve finished reading my book, and you took my files. So now you’re responsible for my potential boredom. It’s your duty to entertain me.”
“Yeah” he agreed with a smirk “It’s my duty” 
"So, how do you plan to do that? Are you going to dance? Sing? Juggle?"
"I can't dance or sing, and I don't have anything to juggle. Is it enough if we just talk? Or is that too common of an entertainment for you?"
You pretended to think for a moment.
"Fine, I guess."
"Then what are you planning to do when you get back?"
"Visit Jeremy."
"Oh, right, sorry…”
"Come on," you interrupted, waving your hand. A moment of silence followed as you hesitated before speaking again. However, you remembered that you had decided to stop staying silent about your worries and problems, at least in his presence. "It's just... it really stresses me out. I don't know how I should talk to him, I'm afraid I'll panic when I see him..."
Spencer cleared his throat before answering. 
“That... can really be tough,” he said, not bothering to lie or reassure you that everything would go perfectly. “But hey, remember that he’s probably looking forward to seeing his big sister. Even if you start talking about something you think is silly, he’ll be happy just to have you there.”
He made you smile, though the corners of your eyes began to gently dampen. You wiped them discreetly, not wanting to burst into tears on the jet.
"I hope you're right. And I hope he doesn't hate me for not being there for him..."
You stopped, feeling him take your hand. You realized you had been clenching it into a fist for quite some time.
"I don't know Jeremy, so I can only guess how he'll react. But I'm sure of one thing—he definitely doesn't hate you."
For a long time, you simply stared at your hand in his warm grip. Your fingers relaxed, releasing the tension that had been between them, becoming limp yet yearning for the touch.
"Spencer," you said suddenly, taking a deep breath. "I don't know if I can ask you this... but... you've been there for me this whole time and... okay, I’ll understand if you say no, but... would you maybe... want to visit him with me? I don't know if I can do it alone."
You waited for his response, your heart beating faster with each passing moment. Maybe it was too much? Maybe you shouldn’t be asking him for something like this; maybe it crossed the line of your acquaintance? Just a year ago... no, even a week ago, you never would have imagined you’d be begging anyone for something like this. You would have forced yourself to do it alone, ignoring your fear.
He simply smiled.
"Of course, you can ask me to do that. And I'm glad I'll be able to accompany you."
*
The sound of quickly pressed keys echoed as you gave the hospital receptionist your brother’s last name.
The stark whiteness of the place and the blinding, intense light felt like a scene straight out of a horror movie. The thought of seeing Jeremy soon made you tremble. You had so many questions for him, including why he even tried to take his own life, but you knew you couldn’t ask them just yet. He didn’t need an interrogation to satisfy your curiosity; he needed support.
You were so overwhelmed at the thought of seeing him that you shifted impatiently from foot to foot. You felt stressed but also excited. After all, he was your little brother, and you missed him. Standing beside you, Reid smiled slightly, noticing your behavior. If you were hurting him by squeezing his hand as tightly as you could, he didn’t let it show.
"Who are you to the patient?" the receptionist asked.
"His sister."
"And you?" she turned to Spencer.
"A frie—" he began, probably intending to say friend.
"Fiancé," you interrupted, quickly offering a word that began with the same letter. You worried that if the woman found out he wasn’t connected to you or Jeremy, she might ask him to stay in the waiting room. You didn’t expect him to go into Jeremy's room with you, but you wanted the reassurance that he’d be right outside, not on the other side of the hospital.
Reid first looked at you like you were crazy. You tried to silently signal him to join in on your desperate act. Luckily, he caught on incredibly fast.
"That's right, fiancé. Basically, husband. We're getting married... tomorrow," he improvised, nodding with such conviction that he almost seemed to believe it himself. "Well, actually, not tomorrow, but the day after, because tomorrow is Sunday, and we’re Catholic. In our religion, 
“Darling,” you gritted through your teeth, seeing the receptionist’s confused expression.
“In any case, I’m very close to the patient,” he emphasized.
If he said anything more, you would’ve nudged him with your elbow.
“Well… in that case… the patient is in room number fourteen. It’s that way…” She pointed in the right direction. You thanked her with an overly wide smile. “And… congratulations.”
“God bless you,” Reid said as he waved goodbye.
You quickly turned around, so she wouldn’t see your burst of laughter. As soon as you were out of the receptionist's sight, you hit him on the back so hard that a woman with a cast on her arm almost dropped her coffee. He laughed, and you awkwardly tried to hide how much the whole situation amused you as well.
“If I had let you say one more word, she wouldn’t have let either of us in,” you complained. “She would’ve thought we were freaks. Religious freaks. Or maybe point us to the psychiatric ward.”
“Hey, I’m not the best actor. You should know that,”
“I didn’t know. I’ll remember for next time, though I’m not sure if there will ever be another situation where you’ll need to pretend to be my husband.”
"Fiancé," he corrected. "You decided that yourself."
"Basically a husband. You decided that yourself."
You didn’t say anything more, only grabbed the edge of his coat sleeve to slow his pace. You were standing outside room 14, right in front of the door. You didn’t even peek inside; you weren’t ready to see Jeremy just yet.
“I need one more minute,” you whispered.
“Take all the time you need,” he replied gently.
 The playful mood that had accompanied you both was gone. Not knowing what to do with your hands, you stood on tiptoe and began adjusting his poorly tied scarf. 
“Sorry,” you muttered under your breath. “It’s been bothering me since I saw you.”
"I'll wait for you here, okay?" he asked quietly. Because you were so close to him, he barely had to raise his voice at all. "Jeremy doesn’t know me, I don’t want to just show up unannounced..."
“Are you coming in or what?”
You turned around, startled, to see none other than Jeremy. Lying on the hospital bed, poking at a container of chocolate pudding with a spoon, and most importantly, awake. 
At first, you were surprised, but soon emotion took control of your body, and you ran to him as if he were about to disappear.
"Oh my God, I can finally see you..." His shirt, which you hugged tightly, muffled your words.
"The pudding spilled on your jacket."
"I don't care."
He chuckled into your hair, holding you tighter. You stayed like that for a moment, desperately holding back tears. If even one had surfaced, you would’ve fallen apart like a child.
ou pulled away after a long time, immediately noticing that his eyes were also filled with tears. However, he quickly wiped them away with his hand. Still, he was a sixteen-year-old boy, and crying in front of his sister felt like public humiliation for him, a shame that would last forever. You tried to do everything you could to avoid looking at his wrists. Both hands were wrapped in bandages, and from the conversation with your father, you learned that they had put in a lot of stitches. You focused on looking at his face—young, similar to yours, with the same blue eyes.
"Are parents visiting you?"
He shrugged.
"Father, surprisingly, more often. Mother drops by irregularly and talks about strange things. Apparently, our neighbor's dog has worms, and it really pisses her off. My mother, not the neighbor. Though, probably the neighbor too..."
You didn't know why you started crying.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..." you mumbled, your words slurring. “I should have gotten here earlier, and I didn’t. I regret so much that I didn’t, I’m sorry. I should have been here the moment you woke up.”
He didn’t say anything, letting you lament. Finally, you wiped away the last tear, then apologized to him about eighteen more times. You sat together in silence for a moment, busying yourself with wiping the dirty jacket. He wasn’t joking about the pudding.
“How are you feeling?”
He shrugged.
“Tolerable, I guess. By the way, who was that guy who came in with you?”
You turned toward the entrance, but Spencer was nowhere to be seen. He must have sat on one of the chairs outside the room, and knowing him, he’d probably started reading some medical brochure.
“A friend,” you replied briefly. “I hope it doesn’t bother you that I brought him... It’s just…”
You didn’t know how to explain that you couldn’t have made it here without support.
“He works for the FBI too?” he asked, suddenly curious. “Would he tell me more about the job than you do?”
You crossed your arms over your chest, pretending to be dead serious.
“I won’t let him tell my little brother any graphic details.”
“I’m not a kid!”
“To me, you are, and always will be.”
He looked like he was holding back from sticking his tongue out at you.
“Call him,” he asked. “I’d love to meet your friend. Is he a friend, or a friend?”
“Jeremy, you’re ridiculous…”
But you fulfilled his request. Spencer stared at you with wide eyes when you told him that your brother wanted to see him. As he entered the room, he almost tripped over... probably his own feet, since there was nothing else to trip on. And that’s how the rest of the visit went, the three of you together. Jeremy alternated between complaining about the hospital food and bombarding Reid with questions about absolutely everything related to being a profiler. He had always been fascinated by it, but after everything that had happened to you, you couldn’t, with a clear conscience, recommend that job to him. Spencer had been explaining everything in detail to him, and for the next hour, you almost felt like an intruder in their private conversation, which amused you instead of offending you.
Spencer left a moment before you, giving you a chance to say goodbye to your brother privately. When you finally released him from your embrace, promising you'd come back tomorrow, the same nurse who had spoken with you at the reception entered the room. She was checking Jeremy’s condition as you headed for the exit.
“Wait,” she suddenly said. “I think your husband left his scarf.”
She held up the purple scarf, indeed Reid's. You were about to thank her and take it when you noticed Jeremy’s mouth hanging open, and with horror, you realized what she'd said.
"Forgive me, dear sister, but what the fuck?”
*
“So, he’s convinced that we had a secret, spontaneous wedding that you didn’t tell him about?”
“Yeah. Something like that.”
In reality, Jeremy had probably realized immediately that there was a misunderstanding, but he just couldn’t pass up the chance to tease you. He would likely bring it up again for the rest of your life. You were also worried that you'd get an angry phone call from your mother asking why you didn’t mention your “wedding,” but overall, you were content with how the meeting went.
You both walked together in an unknown direction, neither of you sure when you should part ways or if you even wanted to. You didn’t want to, but you had no idea about him. The weather was much better than in the town where you had spent the last few days. The fewer trees meant that autumn wasn’t as pronounced. It was only present in the chilly, gusty wind.
"If you don't have any plans, how about going out to eat?" you suggested.
"Sure." Reid agreed immediately, and the corner of your mouth twitched at the speed of his response. "What are you in the mood for?"
"Well, anything. There's a good restaurant on the corner of this street... Oh, God, I just remembered, I owe someone dinner as a thank you."
"Dinner? As a thank you?" he repeated with a strange look on his face. Before he could say anything else, he caught himself and snorted. "Interesting. Just curious, is it someone I know?"
"Oh, you know him." You continued with a barely suppressed smile. "Do you remember James Rivas? The forest ranger?"
Reid literally stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.
"Dinner? With him?"
"That's right. Well, he saved my life, so I guess I owe him that."
You were shocked when you learned how your team knew where to find you after you were kidnapped. The bunker Osborne took you to was unknown to the local authorities, hidden deep in the forest, far from any paths. When the rumor spread through the town about who was responsible for the murders and that an FBI agent had been kidnapped, the forest ranger showed up at the police station. He revealed that he knew the place where you might have been held because, as a child, he used to go there with friends, including Logan Osborne.
But of course, you had no intention of taking him to dinner. You just wanted to laugh at Reid's reaction.
"You're absolutely not owed anything by him!" he blurted out with emotion, a hint of anger in his voice. "If he'd only remembered that he knew about the existence of some bunker, you wouldn't have been kidnapped in the first place. You wouldn't have had to go through that hell, and I wouldn't have been losing my mind the whole time, not knowing what happened to you. Plus, have you forgotten what an awful person he is? He's arrogant, self-absorbed, and full of self-admiration—do you really want to have dinner with someone like that...are you laughing?"
He furrowed his brow, completely confused by your reaction.
“God, Reid, I was just joking! I’d rather die than spend another hour with that jerk. Especially voluntarily,” you explained, laughing between words. Something in his remark made you smirk. “Were you really losing your mind when I was kidnapped? “
“You’re impossible," he snorted. “Where’s that restaurant?”
“Wait, don’t change the topic and answer my question”
He simply looked at you, tilting his head to the side.
 “Isn’t it obvious?”
taglist: @miriamnox @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @nightfullofparadox
thank you everyone for reading <3
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lizard12323 · 4 months ago
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I'll just sit in the corner and pretend everything's fine
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bibiana112 · 10 months ago
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And for bad oversharing medical news the arrhythmia from december never went away but I thought maybe the throat infection was still there right so that could be a reason but then I went to a specialist and not only is it practically cured (just lingering a bit) but my lungs sound fine as well! which means! the shortness of breath is probably something wrong with the oxygen in the bloodstream and the slight chest tightness is also extremely worrying I could only make an appointment to get it checked next friday and that sounds like way too long
#I know it's morbid but the only thing I can think about is how fucking mad I am at my parents and how I wish I had someone else to take care#of my things and burial if I were to die#they don't know me#they would do everything against my wishes because they never cared to listen#and Especially I am mad at my dad cause when this started he was around and I was really scared and upset and nearly crying and I told him#that I was considering going to the hospital right there and then and then he didn't. fucking say anything or ask if I was okay#they'll never listen anything just registers as crazy fucking kid having a tantrum again let's give her space leave her out of sight#And I had to Yell at him to stop telling me not to go to the hospital the next day and I mean Yell and he still said they'd deny it#that I was making it up if I had just been on my fucking own I wouldn't have double guessed myself on it and gone to the wrong specialist#and wasted time and gotten to the point where it's not like debilitating pain but constantly aware that it's there and I can only like eat#heart healthy shit that I don't even like and wait and god I am so upset at them why so I have to be alone and yet still be so tied to them#why pretend to care when I've said time and time again they're still hurting me like nearly everytime we see each other#Okay nevermind I actually Need to distract myself now usually confronting feelings is my favorite#but my body is telling me that if I want to cry I have to deal with it physically feeling like there's a hole between my ribs so#I'll hold off on it#I'll be fine#god going to sleep has been the absolute worse#delete later
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#wowie zowie vani is feeling bad again <3 yaaaay <3 /s#anyway. i am. literally so stupid. so dumb!#all i want is attention and love and yet i shove people away and pull them back in this stupid hot-and-cold ritual#somehow people put up with it but like. of course i have like zero irl friends. i never go out. i never talk to people#i sit alone at meals. i sit by people i'm friendly with in classes or as close to alone as i can. i spend most of my free time in my dorm#hell i got rejected by the job i applied to and my first thought was 'lol just like everything else <3'#sigh. and then i'm the dumb one for still holding on to a little bit of hope bc one of my confessions i wasn't outright rejected on#so there was always this tinge of 'maybe i still have a chance' but that was so fucking stupid of me#i never have a chance. but its whatever. i can't blame anyone but myself for keeping my own hopes up despite all the evidence#i can handle it though. bury the tinge of grief in my schoolwork and stress. ignore people. pretend its all okay#i've deluded myself into thinking i was fine before. i can do it again. i can ignore the loneliness. the little bit of hurt when i see#other people having what i want. i'm good at that. sooo good at it.#maybe i don't dislike some of the people i think i do. i just envy them. they get to have everything i want.#i guess that's just what having zero self-confidence or self-esteem does to you though. ah well#its all my own fault anyway. i'll be fine.#and hey. maybe no one wants me because i'm just damaged goods. but that's a whole other can of worms#i know i'm tainted and unlovable but man. i can hope sometimes.#anyway. im not allowed to drop out and i'm not allowed to hurt myself and i'm not allowed to die. gotta remember all that at the minimum.#vent in tags#anyway. don't worry abt me if you read this far. i'm okay. mostly.
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vampireimiko · 1 month ago
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i loved your most recent steve work! i was wondering if i could request an eddie work similar to that where the hellfire club just doesn’t believe that he could have a gf
Full of Surprises
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warnings, none! note, this was fun to write !! also i didn't include the whole hellfire club i didn't feel like writing the extras in💔
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"Eddie, you expecting a call or something? You keep staring at the phone like a maniac." Mike pointed out.
"You noticed too?! I didn't wanna say anything but holy shit, every few seconds he stares at it." Dustin agrees.
Eddie rolled his eyes, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. "Yeah I'm uh, just waiting on my girlfriend to call." he muttered, his tone nonchalant, but the room instantly fell into a stunned silence.
Mike’s eyes widened. “Girlfriend?”
Dustin snorted, crossing his arms. “Sure, Eddie. And I’m dating Madonna.”
Eddie shot them both an annoyed glance. “I’m serious.”
The skepticism in the air was palpable. Lucas raised an eyebrow from across the room, tossing a pencil onto the table. “Eddie Munson... with a girlfriend? That’s rich.”
"What's that supposed to mean?" Eddie asked, defensively, leaning forward.
Dustin shrugged, an innocent grin on his face. "C'mon, man. If you had a girlfriend, we would’ve heard about it by now."
"And met her," Lucas added.
Eddie groaned, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. "Not everything revolves around you guys, y’know. Some relationships are private."
Dustin, Lucas, and Mike exchanged skeptical glances before bursting into laughter. "Yeah, right! What, does she go to another school or something?" Mike teased.
"Yeah there's no way in hell Eddie Munson gets bitches." Dustin laughed.
"Well news flash, Dusty boy! I do infact gets bitches. Not that my girlfriends a bitch or anything." He said adding that last part very quickly. Even though you weren't there, he'd never disrespect you like that or in any way for that matter.
Dustin raised his hands in mock surrender, still grinning. "Okay, okay, so you get bitches. Prove it."
"Yeah, let’s see some evidence," Lucas added with a smirk. "I mean, it’s kinda hard to believe when we’ve never even seen her. Is she invisible or something?"
Eddie huffed, tapping his fingers on the table, clearly annoyed but trying to keep his cool. "She’s not some trophy I need to parade around, alright? She’s busy. She’s got... a job! School stuff too."
"Uh-huh, and I’m guessing she also lives in Canada and only writes letters?" Mike quipped, earning a round of chuckles from the others.
Eddie sighed dramatically, throwing his hands in the air. "Fine! You wanna meet her so bad? She’ll come by Hellfire next week."
Dustin raised an eyebrow, his grin widening. "Oh, really? Can’t wait."
"Yeah yeah, I'll believe it when I see it. Now enough about his imaginary girlfriend, I'm hungry." Mike interrupted.
The next week couldn’t have come fast enough for the Hellfire boys. The anticipation was thick in the air as they sat around the table, pretending to focus on the campaign, but their eyes constantly darted to the door. Even Eddie, who usually basked in his Dungeon Master role with enthusiasm, seemed a little distracted, checking his watch more than usual.
Dustin nudged Lucas under the table. “You think he’s actually gonna pull through? Or are we about to witness the most embarrassing bluff in Hellfire history?”
Lucas smirked. “I dunno, man. He’s been pretty confident. It’s either the truth, or he’s about to go down in flames.”
The whole week leading up to this very moment, Eddie talked about you to the guys. They obviously did not believe him one bit. Eddie had told them about some of your hobbies, favorite movies, he was even close to telling them where you worked but quickly decided against that.
They always asked him to just give out your name, but then they'd know who you were obviously. Eddie wanted to keep a little bit of mystery surrounding your identity. News flash, you were a quite known person at Hawkins High.
"Can't wait to see him squirm either way," Mike added with a grin.
Eddie, sensing their whispers, glared across the table. “You know, you guys are real supportive friends.”
“We’re just preparing for disappointment, Eddie,” Dustin shot back, hands raised. “Don’t take it personally.”
Eddie opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, there was a knock on the door. The room fell silent, and all eyes shot toward the entrance. Eddie’s cocky grin returned as he stood up, walking over to the door with a confidence that even had Dustin second-guessing his skepticism.
He swung the door open, and there she was—you. Dressed casually, you gave Eddie a warm smile before stepping into the room, completely unaware of the stunned expressions plastered across the faces of his friends.
“Hey, babe,” Eddie greeted you, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. “Told you I wasn’t making her up.”
The room was deathly quiet, the boys blinking in disbelief as you walked further into the room.
Mike was the first to break the silence. “Holy shit. Y/N Y/LN?
You laughed softly, glancing at Eddie before turning back to the group. “I take it he’s been bragging about me?”
“More like we didn’t believe you existed,” Lucas admitted, still wide-eyed. "Much less did we expect the girlfriend to be you?!"
Dustin was still frozen, mouth hanging open in shock. “Eddie... how?”
Eddie grinned smugly, draping an arm around your shoulders. “Told you, Dustin. I get bitches. Not that I'm calling you a bitch." He quickly clarified, knowing you didn't tolerate any type of getting called out of your name.
You playfully elbowed him in the side. “I know you'd never do anything like that."
Eddie chuckled, raising his hands in mock surrender. “Noted.”
"Anyway, nice to meet you guys! I've seen you around and Eddie talks about you guys all the time." You exclaimed cheerfully, extending a hand to the nearest person to you, which happened to be Mike.
Mike, still in shock, shook your hand cautiously, like he couldn’t quite believe you were real. “Uh, nice to meet you too…”
Lucas stood up, still blinking. “Okay, I have to ask—how the hell did Eddie Munson land a girlfriend like you?”
You laughed, glancing over at Eddie with a playful smile. “What can I say? He’s full of surprises.”
Eddie grinned proudly, leaning against you. “See? Told you guys. I’m not just some lonely metalhead.”
Dustin finally regained his composure, shaking his head. “This has to be some kind of cosmic glitch. I mean, Y/N Y/LN... and Eddie Munson? Something isn't right."
Lucas nodded in agreement, still processing. “Seriously, I gotta know—what did he say to win you over?”
You smirked, crossing your arms. “Well, he didn’t try too hard, if that’s what you’re thinking. Eddie’s actually... kind of sweet once you get past all the theatrics.”
Eddie gave a mock bow. “Thank you, thank you. Theatrics are part of the charm.”
You giggled and gave him a loving look.
Mike snorted. “Yeah, we’re still trying to figure out what charm you’re talking about.”
Eddie shot Mike a look, then turned back to you, clearly soaking in the validation. “See what I deal with?”
You shook your head, laughing. “They’re not so bad, Eddie. Just a little... doubtful.” You glanced at the group, your expression softening.
Dustin nodded. “You’re like, Hawkins royalty compared to... well, Eddie.”
You raised an eyebrow, giving Eddie a curious look. “Royalty, huh?”
Eddie rolled his eyes, but you could tell he secretly liked the sound of it. “They exaggerate. A lot.”
You smiled warmly at him. “Well, royalty or not, he’s good to me. And that’s what matters.”
Mike finally cracked a grin. “Alright, alright. Maybe you’re not completely full of shit, Eddie.”
Dustin laughed, pointing a finger. “Still can’t believe it though. You lucked out, Munson.”
Eddie smirked, wrapping his arm around your waist. “Told you, man. I’m full of surprises.”
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additional note ! my requests are open if you wanna have me write something<3
𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧
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puffleyia · 6 months ago
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Clandestine || Theodore Nott
Theodore Nott x fem!riddle!reader || 2.2k words
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Warnings: fingering, blowjobs, in the room of requirement … The request from anon was y/n riddle x theo so this is what i came up withh !
Summary: Mattheo can not seem to place his finger on what exactly you have been keeping from him. He confides in his best friend, Theo, though he ends up cutting the conversation short due to some urgent matters. (aka, you)
Author's notes: Hi lovelies <33 Requests are open! I'm working already on requests, and so sorry if i don't reply to your requests, i'll reply to them with the actual fic once done. please be patient w me, i'm busy as of late <3
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You have always hit it off with your brother’s best friend, Theo. Though at first, you really did not think much of him. It started with small talk whenever you two had ran into each other because of Matt, then it became that you both had found out that you had much more in common than you initially thought. You two often went behind his back, as friends, such as studying in the library together or often just hanging out in general.
You both promised you would keep things secret when you two got together because if Matt would find out Theo ever laid a hand on you, he is definitely throwing his own hands. (okay well, just imagine if your best friend dated your sibling?) The two of you knew how he was protective over you. Though things had quickly escalated between you both from generally acceptable, to ‘Mattheo would probably fucking kill me’ really quick.
Theo is far from a weak man, but he is, he really is and only when it comes to you. How could he not make you his girlfriend? 
Theo quickly grounds back himself in place, realising he hadn’t been listening to Matt at all. “...I don’t know, man, I just feel like she’s been hiding something from me—” Matt says as he bites his lip in uncertainty, continuing to go on about you. He would actually pay to see the look on Matt’s face when he finds out that he’s the secret you have been hiding. He just nods and occasionally shoots an ‘okay’, pretending as if he’s still following. 
Though Theo has better things to worry about, his mind drifted off once more at the thought of you. He looks down at his watch, he realises something. Five more minutes, he mutters under his breath. In just a few minutes’ time, he would be heading out of the common room, making some half-assed excuse just to meet you in the room of requirement. Ever since you both had found out about it, no doubt you abused the privacy it gave. 
“–Theo? What’s up? You seem distracted,” Matt asks, his tone tinged with suspicion, as he crosses his arms as he sunk into the couch.
“Yeah, uh, no, I’m fine,” Theo stammers, quickly recollecting himself before speaking again. “Maybe she’s just stressed, Matt, you know that she takes her studies seriously.” He lets the lie roll off his tongue smoothly, as if he weren’t going to rock your shit in a few minutes’ time. “Yeah, you’re right, I guess I’ll just ask her,” Matt sighs as he continues. “I just can’t shake the feeling that something’s off.”
“I’m sure she’s fine, Matt. She can handle herself.” Theo reassures Matt, though a slight pang of guilt hits him. It quickly fades away though as he checks the time. Two minutes. “Sorry to cut this short, Matt. But I just remembered I promised Blaise I’d meet him for something. I’ll be back quick.” He makes an excuse off the top of his head, already standing up and ready to leave. 
“Blaise? Since when are you two having meetings?” Matt roused in doubt, as he quirks up an eyebrow. “Nah, you know, things just come up at the last minute.” Theo replies, but Matt is nothing short of sceptical. “Sure thing, Theo.” He says, “I can wait.” Theo does not bother replying anymore, already rushing out the common room and making his way to the seventh floor, left corridor. His thoughts linger on if Matt actually suspected him.
He quickly forgets everything as he spots you, pacing in circles as you wait for him. You do not seem to notice him, as he sneaks up behind you and firmly places his hands on your shoulders as he says a small ‘boo’. You jolt in shock, quickly turning around. “Oh my God, you scared me,” you place a hand on your chest and sigh in relief. 
“Sorry, amore, got caught up in things. Your brother’s growing suspicious of you, you know.” He says, slightly gritting his teeth, pausing briefly before he continues speaking. “He doesn’t know exactly what, but he thinks you’re not telling him something. I’m not sure if he suspects me.” 
“Nevermind it. He always has his detective hat on when it comes to me.” You sigh and shake your head, saying as you both walk past a certain bit of wall three times. You both watch as the door materialises in front of you, as Theo opens the door for you. “Ladies first,” he says flirtatiously, you smile as you tuck a lock of hair behind your ear.  
It reveals a smaller room than you’d imagine, since Theo was the one incharge of doing this sort of stuff, also usually taking up the responsibility of planning, which means letting yourself be surprised. Huh, so it’s going to be like that today. 
The room was fairly empty, the parchment on the walls a dull brown, a double four-poster bed in the middle and with mahogany nightstands on either side. He wastes no time, pushing you as you fall back onto the plush mattress. “We have to make this fast, Matt thinks I just had to do something real quick with Blaise.” He says with a hint of urgency in his voice as he crawls atop you, leaning in.
His face inches from yours, “is this okay, principessa?” He asks, before doing anything. “Please,” you nod. He spits on his fingers before swiftly connecting your lips together, kissing you passionately. He creeps his hands just underneath your skirt, gliding over the hem of your panties. He does not bother pulling them down, instead just sliding his hands into them as he traces the folds of your pussy.
You moan into the kiss, Theo taking the opportunity to glide his tongue into your mouth. Your tongues intertwine, as he swirls his around yours. He slowly slips two fingers into you as he pulls away from your lips, your breath hitching at the sudden action. His lips brush against your ears letting his breath tickle them, before he gently bites your earlobe. “You like that, cara mia?” He husks sultrily, as he begins to move his fingers.
“Y-yes, mhngg, Theo,” you mewl, letting out a breath you didn't even know you were holding. He languidly strokes his fingers, thrusting them in and out your pussy. “Pretty girl, taking my fingers so well.” He rasps in your ear. Then curling his fingers, hitting your sweet spot, causing you to let out a particularly loud moan. You were burning up, all hot and heavy as you moved your hips back down onto his fingers.
He moves his other hand smoothly up your dress shirt, brazenly skimming under your bra as he cups your breast. He kisses you again, locking your lips together once again. The movement of his finger quickens, as he tugs at your nipples. You continue grinding down even more so on his fingers, chasing release. He goes down to ghost his lips over your neck, sucking at the sensitive flesh as you feel his teeth sink into your skin. 
You throw your head back in pleasure, giving him better access to your neck. He leaves red marks, which will definitely not go unnoticed later on. Albeit Theo doing so many things to you at once made your head feel hazy to think any clearly. You feel a warmth coiling in your stomach, as you hold onto his arm, digging your nails into them as you chase your high. “M’gonna cum,” you cried out, as he only made the manoeuvre of his fingers rougher, hitting your sweet spot over and over without fail. 
“Cum for me, principessa,” he remarked firmly, which sounded like more of an order than anything else. Lust clouds your head, as you slowly feel yourself slip away. Your body reacts on its own, doing whatever it takes for you to climax. Muttering incoherently, your hearing goes muffled and unable to comprehend the small praises Theo voices. You feel a sense of euphoria wash over you as you tighten around his fingers, cumming all over them.
“Good girl,” he says, pulling his fingers out of you and lapping at your slick on them. “I think I have to go, amore,” he stands up, giving you a peck on the forehead as he heads for the door. “Wait,” you say abruptly. Catching up to him, stopping in his tracks just as he was about to leave. You bit your lip in contemplation, as you were not used to being so bold. 
“At least let me suck you off,” you say, puffing it out in one breath, nothing short of awkward as you curl up into a ball internally. Theo is caught off guard by that, but he’s more than happy to comply. He smirks slyly, amused that you were eager to please him, too. “Get on your knees, cara mia,” he commands, and you hastily drop down, kneeling as you look up at him. 
Skillfully, you clamp your teeth down on the zip, feeling the cold metal brush against your tongue. Applying gentle pressure, you coax the zipper of his fly down in a slow, rhythmic motion, teasing him. You palm his hard cock through his boxers as he grunts in response. You press your lips on the edge of the soft fabric, guiding the fabric downward. Releasing his dick from its confines, you flinch as it hits your cheek.
Initially, you begin by taking the base in your hand and giving kitten licks on the tip, occasionally kissing it. You look up at him, watching him groan as he shuts his eyes and furrows his eyebrows when you take the tip of his cock into your mouth. “Cazzo, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he mutters, as you slowly sink your mouth on his dick, your lips stretch to accommodate him. 
“Hurry up,” he huffs, as he grasps your hair firmly with both hands and gives it a good tug, causing you to lurch forward. Your mouth stuffed with his cock, you gag and he watches as tears brim at the corners of your eyes due to sudden action. “That’s it,” he utters, drawing out the syllables as he groans gratifyingly. He loved taking things slow and romantic with you, but this was not the time for it, especially since he had told Matt he would be quick. 
All he needed was to cum, and a good quickie was no stranger to the both of you. (You’ll never forget when he fucked you in the broom cupboard in between classes.) He keeps a firm hold on you, his hands tangled in your soft locks as he starts fucking into your mouth. You let out a few muffled words, tears begin streaming down your cheeks and drool down your chin as you choke when you take his dick down your throat. 
“You look so pretty when you cry, cara mia.” 
He husks, as he trails one of his hands to cup your cheek as he continues thrusting into your mouth. He uses his thumb to wipe away your tears, smirking as he ruins you. You dig your fingers onto his hips, using him as a means for support. “Merda,” he utters out a string of both curses and praises, his thrusts growing more erratic. 
He loved watching you come undone, with your tear-stained face, ruffled hair, swollen lips, and your lipstick smearing all over his dick. Feeling his cock twitch in your mouth, Theo’s hips stutter. “I’m gonna cum, principessa,” he groans. His hips jerk up one last time, spilling his seed down your throat as he lets out a guttural moan. Attempting to swallow, his cum overflows out your mouth as it trickles down your chin.
He pulls his dick out of your mouth, humming in satisfaction. He takes care of you and helps you clean up albeit hurriedly before you two part ways. Turns out you promised your friends you would study with them in the library, and you too were sorely running late.
Making his way back into the common room, Mattheo doesn’t fail to notice Theodore. "Well, look who decided to grace us with his presence. How was your urgent ‘meeting’ with Blaise?" He remarked, almost sounding sarcastic. Theo, looking awfully dishevelled, tries to play it cool. "Oh, you know, just some last-minute…business. Nothing too exciting." Theo kept a nonchalant tone, "yeah, you know how it is, Blaise and I are always on the go." 
Matt’s eyes narrow in suspicion. "Funny, Blaise mentioned he hadn't seen you all day." He says, and then Theo suddenly hears another voice speak. "On the go, huh? Didn't realise you were such a busy man, Theo." Blaise said smugly, smirking with his arms crossed as he leaned on a wall behind Theo. 
He immediately looked behind him, his eyes widening as he hadn’t realised Blaise had been standing there all this time. (Blaise had been concealed by the deceptive alignment of the door and the wall. So when Theo entered, Blaise was standing by the wall adjacent to the end of the hall– if that makes sense.) 
"Seems like you're hiding something, Theo. You've been acting a bit off lately." Matt says nearly too confident for it to be sceptical. "Me? Nah, I'm just tired from all the studying. Speaking of which, I should probably get some rest." Theo shrugs, trying to deflect the topic. "Yeah, rest up for all those secret meetings, right?" Blaise says teasingly.
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webslingingslasher · 4 months ago
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can you please give us something angsty between ethan and trouble? like how ethan texts her and she ignores the messages during the breakup. or when they run into each other in the cafeteria and trouble pretends he’s not there and walks away despite he’s calling out her name. the way trouble no longer crochets because that was her thing with ethan and it feels strange to pick up the needles and it makes her miss him.
*cleaning out my drafts!*
ethan is peter's best friend and by default, he owes you nothing.
you were a friend for the moment but once you and peter ended, so did the alliship. ethan didn't get that in the memo, but he's never made a friend through peter and lost her through him too. he keeps thinking everything is normal, like there isn't a giant peter shaped hole in the fence.
'hey, so i was thinking we could have a little study sesh at the library?'
'i'll rent out a room. and it would be just us.'
'obv.'
you miss him too sometimes. but he chose peter by default and you don't condemn him one bit for it, ally did the same with you. peter was ethan's friend first, so he should still be one when you walked away.
peter doesn't talk to ally anymore either. both friends became constant reminders of what you had and lost.
it might be a text message but you can hear ethan's voice in your head, he sounds defeated.
'i'm guessing that's a no.' you never open them but he knows you read them. it doesn't surprise ethan, you've ignored him since you dumped peter. he just never expected to be dumped too.
'i miss you.'
'i just wanna hang out with you again.'
'and if you don't want him around either that's fine with me.'
'i'll fly you somewhere in my private jet.'
'damn it. i was really hoping for a "you have a private jet???" response.'
'it's a yes btw. just because i know you're curious.'
'well, actually, it's my parents but you always say that's the same thing.'
you watch each notification appear and disappear. your teeth dig into your bottom lip to stop a smile, you can't go backwards. if you're around ethan it leads to peter and you can't do that.
ethan didn't realize there might be a reason why you haven't been texting him back, but he does now. what if you weren't replying because you weren't seeing them? he thought you were just ignoring him but it's been weeks of silence.
'did you block me too?'
he hopes not. he really, really hopes not. ethan knows why you pushed him away, he's just upset that he didn't get a say in it. ethan's never been able to tell you how sorry he is on behalf of his best friend and how he doesn't want to lose you over his idiocy.
you frown at the message, restraining your impulse to text him back, you hold your breath and wait for another message.
it comes two minutes later and your entire heart shatters.
'crochet buddy?'
you haven't been able to look at your basket of hooks and yarn, it feels wrong to finish your pig. you told ethan you kept messing up on the ears and he said he'd do them for you. he never got the chance. you wonder if he finished his lizard tail.
your thumbs move before your mind can stop you, not that it would. you had to tell him the truth, you can't have him wallow and sulk over you.
peter might deserve it but ethan doesn't.
'it would surprise me if you didn't have a private jet.'
'hey!!!!!!!!'
'don't leave yet pls.'
'let me take you out to lunch. we can go to the village or brooklyn.'
'i promise he won't find out.'
'please?'
'i miss my buddy.'
you think it's almost as painful as splitting from peter. ethan is peter's best friend and you can't get in the middle of that. it'll hurt peter just as bad and while part of you wants him to be hurt over you, you don't want to use ethan as the pawn to do it.
you back out of the conversation, lock your phone, set it down, and grab your unfinished pig before curling up with him for a nap.
---
ethan doesn't eat in kayte hall. you know he doesn't eat in kayte hall because you ate in cathedral hall with the sig nu frat.
used to.
you switched to kayte hall two weeks ago, it was an extra five minute walk but it was done with the purpose to avoid situations like this.
you try to move discreetly, it doesn't matter, he clocked you the second you sat down. you can't abandon ship, he's sliding in the seat across from you.
'you're avoiding me and i really hate it. you made me stoop so low i had to get a pledge to track you down for me.'
you're not going to give him the silent treatment, that would be plain rude.
'are you admitting to stalking me?'
'i'm admitting that i instructed someone to stalk you. are you flattered? you should be.'
'why aren't you at cathedral?'
'because you don't eat there anymore, duh. can i have a grape?' you hesitate before sliding your tray halfway up the table, he takes three.
you listen to the purple crush between his teeth, ethan looks a bit more serious after he swallows. you look at your cup, his stare makes you feel guilty.
'look, let me get this out of the way now so we don't have to talk about it again. i don't know all the details, park- peter hasn't really opened up to me about it.'
you swallow tightly, this is exactly what you didn't want to happen.
'from what i know- or pieced together, he disappointed me too. i'm sorry for whatever he did and i'm sorry it hurt you enough that i was caught in the crossfire, but between us, when i'm with you, he doesn't exist. this is the last time i'll ever talk about him, i'll offer you the same courtesy and we won't bring it up again.'
ethan's saying all the right things, you softly shrug. 'what's the courtesy?'
'you can ask me about him if you want to. it'll stay between us, i promise.'
the peter floodgates burst open, you'd done your best to push him from your mind but now you have the opportunity to indulge. you nibble at your bottom lip before looking up at him. ethan's smile is gentle, he's trying so hard for you.
'how is he doing?' from the little rumors you've heard it doesn't seem too good and the harsh bruise splattered across his jawline last week didn't do him any favors.
'um,' his smile tweaked, it's worse than you thought. you know it's bad because ethan's trying to find a way to be honest but not worry you. 'he's okay.'
'please be honest.' you know you ended it, you know it's real this time and you know part of you wants to hate him but if he's really down bad, you might have to give him a visit. ethan takes a deep breath and leans in closer to the table.
'yeah, he um, he kind of tanked. he's not himself right now. he's skipping chapter meetings, he's missing classes and if he's home, he's barricaded in his room or drinking.' your heart sinks, you're not hungry anymore.
'does he miss me?' you almost feel embarrassed to ask. ethan doesn't find the question pitiful, he's just glad you're talking to him. 'bad.'
it's brutal on your end too, but he sounds worse than you. at least you can get through the emotions of your day to day. you wish you could say you won the breakup but there's no winning.
'has he...'
you don't want to know the answer. you don't want to know the answer. you don't want to know the answer.
you still ask it. 'has he hooked up with anyone else?'
'no.' you believe him because he said it quick and with certainty. you nod slowly, it was the answer you wanted but it still didn't feel good.
'is he still going to the parties?' ethan shakes his head, 'i haven't seen him at any.'
'but he still has you, right?' if you didn't have a small support system you would've lost it ten times over by now. peter doesn't have a whole lot but one ethan overpowers ten mediocre friends.
'i asked if he wanted to talk about it, he said not really, i told him i was there for him and he said thanks. there really hasn't been much else, he's just been really quiet.'
ethan is all peter has, you can't rip that away from him. it would be evil to pollute the one thing he still had, you walked away from him and you shouldn't take his friend with you. plus... how could you move on if you have the peter encyclopedia at your fingertips?
'at least he's not crying.' you end it with a half laugh, half hum. it's sad all around and you're trying to lighten the mood, ethan avoids eye contact and your palms rest on the table.
'ethan.'
ethan's not sure if he is or not. he hasn't heard him but there are some days peter would shuffle out from his room for a water or snack and his eyes were a little red. there was evidence of crying but no tears, so he can't say with certainty but he knows.
'i don't know.'
it made up your mind. you can't do this to peter, you can't sneak around with his friend when he's still trying to mend what went down. you grieved the end of your relationship when you were with him, calling it quits was hard and it still is, but you were prepared. peter was caught off guard and he's still analyzing everything that went down, you know he is.
'so... are we cool?'
'of course we are, you were never a problem, ethan.' he looks relieved, releasing a sharp sigh he rests his hand over his heart and smiles brightly. 'oh thank god, i really missed you. so, are we done with the peter talk? are we ready to schedule our next crochet date?'
oh. he must've misunderstood you.
'no, we're not... we're not hanging out ethan, i just wanted you to know i didn't have any bad blood against you.'
ethan's not a mean person and you've never seen him mad at someone but he's hurt and his arms cross over his chest with a sneer.
'why am i being punished for what he did?'
'you're his best friend, ethan.' it's a statement and fact. it also has everything to do with you ghosting him. 'you were my friend too.' it's a raw confession, you can't look at him when he's this sad.
'i know i was. you were mine too, you still are. it's just different now and i'm not saying we can't be friends, but i think it would be better for everyone if we just took a break from each other right now.'
'it's not better for me. everything is weird right now, my best friend is a shell of the person he used to be and my other one pushed me so far away i was convinced she forgot about me.'
'it feels like i'm being iced out from all sides.' he's much sadder when he adds that on. you feel for him and you hate that you're part of the reason he feels excluded.
'i'm really sorry you feel like that, ethan. i promise it won't be forever, but i have my mind made up and no matter how many times you say please, it won't change.'
you're not sure if things between you became really quiet or if the dining hall doubled in sound. ethan's trying to come up with the right combination of words but nothing's good enough to make you come around on the idea.
If please doesn't work, he might have to force you.
'okay. i'll stop asking you to hang out with me.' he sounds fine with it, you're a little suspicious but he might've just wanted to talk to you, even if it was a formal goodbye.
'but i should go now.' ethan pushes against the edge of the table to slide out from his chair. his words are short but his tone is happy, you stare at him extra hard before nodding.
'i'll see you around?'
ethan sends a wink your way, 'see you later.'
---
the contents of your backpack are all over your bed, your phone nowhere to be found. you retrace your previous steps, you had it at lunch and you swore it was in your outer pocket at the library but after that it's blank.
it was either lost or stolen. your entire life was on it, you don't even have a way of telling everyone you lost it. you recheck your bag two more times even after holding it upside down, then fill it back up while giving yourself pity.
you wallow in it for ten minutes, not even a minute after that your roommate rushes in the door with her own phone held out. 'it's ethan.' you reach for it without thinking but pause before you can fully grab it, ally shakes it towards you. 'he said he has your phone?'
ally's unaware of what's happening and is being as helpful as she could but all you're thinking about is when and how he took it. you press her phone to your ear and ask him where your phone is, he plays dumb.
'i'm not fucking around, ethan. this isn't funny, i need my phone.'
'you left it behind at butler, it's a good thing my pledge found it for you.'
there was absolutely no chance of you leaving it, you clench your jaw and try to restrain yourself from throwing a million mean chirps. he sent someone to rob you.
'you stole my phone? why the fuck would you steal my phone?'
'oh, i didn't steal anything. you should be thankful one of our guys found it.'
'found it in my backpack?'
'did he? hm, interesting. but, hey! it's here and it's safe.'
'great, bring it to me.'
there's a pause on the other line, ethan sucks air in through his teeth. 'sorry, no can do, buddy. looks like you'll have to come get it.' your mouth parts in shock, that was the plan? forcing your hand to hang out with him?
'absolutely not. just meet me at kayte.'
'another no go, my friend. i'm stuck here and so is your phone.'
'you're not stuck anywhere, except in a house with my ex.'
'he's not here.'
'i don't believe you.'
you can picture ethan holding his phone into open air, he sounds far away when he calls out 'parker!' there's a solid ten second gap before he sounds crystal clear again. 'see? no threats.'
'ethan, please.'
'just come over, i promise it'll be fun.'
your eyebrows furrow, he thinks it's a game. 'no, nothing will be fun. this will be a business transaction and i'll be out of there in ten seconds.'
'so it's a yes? you're coming over?' if ethan had a tail, he would be wagging it. his plan worked and you're falling right into his hand. if it was anything else, you'd say fuck it and move on. but ethan took the one thing he can hold over your head and you both know it.
'i don't know how, but this is a rich asshole thing and you're being one.'
ethan ignores you. 'make sure to bring your crochet hooks!'
'i'm not doing that.'
'that's okay! i have a bunch of extras.'
'i mean it, ethan. i'm not hanging around!'
'what's that? sorry, you're breaking up on me. we should finish this conversation in person... okay, bye!'
the call disconnects suddenly. you stare at the black screen and take a deep breath to secure your thoughts before making a trek across campus.
---
'give me my phone.'
ethan ignores you and points to his bedside table, there's two waters and an entire box of grocery store cookies. 'here, come have a snack.' he drops his crochet tub on the edge of his bed. 'i got some new yarn, look at how soft it is.'
everything about it was a ruse.
'im serious, ethan. give me my phone.' he sighs and gestures to his desk, he keeps pulling out hooks. 'it's on my desk.' you search the surface, it's extremely tidy with no hiding place.
'no it's not. where is it?'
'hm... i must've misplaced it. i'll help you look in a second.'
if ethan wants to play dirty, you have no issue getting in the mud. you grab a small succulent from his windowsill and raise it next to your head.
'give me my phone, ethan.'
you're fighting fire with fire, ethan eyes his plant in your hold but keeps a straight face. 'i forgot where i put it.' if that's how he wants to act, you have no choice but to follow through on your actions.
you drop the mini cactus, the pot shatters into a dozen pieces and soil spatters around the floor. ethan falls to his knees and screams 'no!' at the plant guts covering the ground.
'she was a kid, you monster! she did nothing to you!'
you grab the matching pot that was next to it. 'give me my phone or the sister gets it.'
'i refuse to negotiate with a terrorist!' you're breaking him, you can see he's hesitant to refuse your compromise. 'i'm sorry you feel that way.'
the clay pot falls just as quick, it lies in a broken heap next to it's twin. ethan acts like he's been shot, a throaty yelp was produced while he delicately held the cacti in his hands.
the plants were fine, all you did was bust the pots. and while breaking personal property was a bar too low for you, you know he has at least a dozen more just like it in his closet.
you look up at his door to watch it crack open, it's a swift movement but it feels like everything is moving in slow motion. you try to back up as quick as you can but you're cemented to the floor and all you can do is stare at the face coming through the door.
'what the hell is... hey.'
you swallow hard, he looks how ethan said. just a shell of what he once was. all you can stare at is the purple bruise on his cheekbone, your heart pangs when it's reminded it's not your job to care about it anymore.
you point at ethan who suddenly is really quiet.
'he stole my phone.'
peter nods slowly before peering down at the mess around your shoes. 'did he give it back?' you shake your head, you feel like a tattle tail, especially when peter looks down at ethan and tells him to give your phone back.
ethan pulls it out of his pocket and hands it right over, your jaw drops and you frown heavily at him. 'you do it when he asks but not me?'
'he'll beat me up, you'll just unhouse my plants.'
'peter would never beat you up.' therefore, his excuse is pointless. ethan disagrees, his eyebrows almost hit his hairline with how confident you are. 'over you? he'd fucking kill me.'
you wait for peter to tag in, you know something is brewing in his mind. something like 'damn right i would,' and you'd follow up with something about how he's actually a big baby and he'd say something like 'only for you' and you'd... but that's not real life anymore and he stays silent.
he's probably confused and a little hurt you're hidden away in ethan's room, you feel the need to apologize even though you're not sure why you're sorry.
'i'm sorry, peter. i tried telling ethan that we should take a break on our friendship but he won't let it go.' you threw him under the bus in a second and you don't care, from the looks of it neither does ethan.
'you can be friends with ethan. you should be friends with ethan.' it's the first time actually talking with him since the break up and it feels weird, he's too formal. he's being kind and reserved, he's pliant and you need some bounce back to feel normal.
'you always said i needed to unfriend him when we were together.' you might've tossed a taunt at him, you wanted a reaction. you wanted your peter and throwing the break up in his face might do it.
it works, his eyebrows furrow while his stature hardens. 'i said a lot of shit i didn't mean when we were together, trouble.' you point at him, your tone ice cold. 'don't.' you refuse to acknowledge the small spread of warmth at the nickname.
'you like ethan, ethan likes you. you guys are good friends, why should i fuck that up? i ruined enough shit for you. the least i could do is give you ethan.'
ethan could speak up to make a joke about how it's like he's a child of divorce or that he's a person, not a piece of property but it feels like you're both having a moment that needs to happen. even if there was a weird energy he was picking up on.
your eyes narrow, he's doing this for reasons beyond being a good person. you know him well enough to know that he has something up his sleeve.
'i can think of something else i'd rather you give me.'
you can see the heat brewing behind his eyes, you got him right where you want him. peter uses his serious voice, the one he uses instead of raising his voice but still demands your attention.
'we're not talking about this here.'
those two sentences just told ethan that whatever you were insinuating was what ended the relationship and peter's very upset stance solidifies his opinion.
'oh, trust me. you're not talking about it at all.'
'we're not unpacking this in front of ethan. i'm on my way out anyway, hang out with your friend.' peter tries to step past you but you circle around to step up with him and block his exit, his chest brushes yours for a second and it takes everything in you not to wrap your arms around him and sink your face into the body you once found homely.
'liar.' he doesn't want you to hang around and he wasn't leaving. you're met with a heavy sigh. 'yeah, probably.' you can't stop yourself, you lightly poke his chest and peter's head drops so he can watch your hold stick longer than it should've.
'be honest.'
'you might be ready to cut the cord but i'm not.' he'd rather keep you in his life as a tie through ethan no matter how sore it was. if you had ethan you'd never fully lose him and that kind of promise is the only thing he wants right now.
'neither am i.'
peter stares at ethan, 'shut up.' he's shunned into silence. you're starting to understand why peter said he wasn't going to unpack anything here, you look down at your hands and play with a ring on your finger.
you think peter wants to talk about it civilly but you don't think either of you are ready to do it yet without hurting either person's feelings even more than they already are.
but having ethan around is a nice way to keep peter close without damaging your healing.
'okay.' you take a deep breath and glance at ethan, who's still pouting on the floor keeping his eye line from peter. 'i guess we can hang out.' he lights up in a second, looking between you and peter in case either one of you vetoes it.
neither of you do.
'sweet! i have to repot these but i have some new templets in my basket, so if you want to pick one out and start i'll just catch up later.' you nervously look towards peter and immediately dart away when you make eye contact.
turning your back on him slightly, you feel a little better. there's something about him that makes you feel jittery, like when you were the first couple times you met up with him alone.
'i don't think being here is a good idea, maybe we should just stick to my dorm?'
'why? parker said he was fine with us hanging out.'
'because maybe parker was being nice and doesn't actually want to see me here?'
peter can speak for himself, and he'll use the correct name. in case you forgot. 'peter, is just fine with you being here. the only sucky part is knowing you hate me.'
you think he might be baiting you now but you can't help but set the record straight. 'okay, hold on now.' you speak very clearly towards him, you're not about to let him twist your words.
'i am a hundred different emotions towards you right now but i don't hate you. i think you know that, parker.'
'okay,' it's full of sarcasm. 'you have a goodnight, trouble. i'll see you later.' you bite your tongue and let him leave, if you didn't, you'd be making subtle shots at each other all night.
'your best friend is a dick.' the second you're alone. ethan shrugs, 'you were into that at one point.'
'no, no. if we're going to be friends you only ever sympathize with me about him, you're not allowed to bring up anything i did in the relationship.'
ethan has a pile of soil and a pile of shattered clay, you feel obligated to help him clean up. 'and for clarification, i'm supposed to sympathize with your ex boy toy when i'm with him?'
'absolutely not. you're on team me at all times. shame him if you have to.' the broken pieces land in his desk trash can. 'is this where i have to remind you he'd kick my ass?'
oh, you missed and loathe this so much.
'you're so whiny, clean quieter.'
'is it too late for you to ghost me again?'
'that's it. clean up your own mess, i'm going to make a crochet snake and not because it's the easiest but because that's how you're acting.'
ethan snorts and nods towards his wicked wicker basket of yarn, you're already eyeing different greens. 'be sure to make one for my twin next door.'
you do.
you leave it outside peter's door and while ethan never confirmed it, he knows you're the one who made it.
and it sleeps on his nightstand next to him every night. 
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umbrellacam · 4 months ago
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Azrael: Agent of the Bat #56 - No Man's Land Dick: "Scared, kid?" Tim: "Not really. A little nervous, I guess." Tim: "Who am I kidding? I'm scared. I feel like those soldiers must have felt right before D-Day." Dick: "D-Day, as in World War Two? You must stay awake in history class." Tim: "We're only up to the Spanish-American War, but I saw the Spielberg movie. Really bloody." Dick: "I hope it doesn't get that bad." Tim: "It won't, will it?" Tim: "Will it?"
Okay, several things I enjoy about this moment.
1. I'm just being so well-fed in terms of great Dick & Tim interactions in this era. Cataclysm, Brotherhood of the Fist, Road to NML, breaking into NML in Robin #67 with classic annoying-older-brother!Dick and Tim panicking about his safety when Dick does a quick death fake-out (typical, honestly lol)... And now with an introspective moment to themselves in the calm before the storm - in Azrael's book no less, lol! I wonder if this came from Dennis O'Neil as something he wanted to include or if it was collaboratively planned as a building-tension moment by the writing/editing teams plotting NML.
2. Tim confiding in Dick my beloved <3 But also - Tim lying at first that he's not really scared, before deciding to just be honest. He has these moments of such earnestness at times (not only with Dick (also YJ, Bruce, Steph, Cass), but often) and they're even more striking because of how prone he is to lying, secrecy, glossing over things and pretending to be fine, etc. most of the time.
He's still pretty young here, barely 15 if that, and his tendencies definitely get worse over time, but he's already wrestled with lying to his Dad, Ariana, Steph, and his other friends, already pretended to be fine to Dick's face in Contagion and Legacy when he was actively dying or under threat of doing so again, refused to tell his Dad he was ever even sick, lied to Bruce's face about Secret, etc... It just sticks out to me so much whenever he chooses to go - yeah, okay, I'll be open with you right now even if it makes me vulnerable.
3. Dick not answering him!! Is that last panel, where we can't see him over Tim's shoulder even though he's positioned right behind him in the others, implying that Dick straight up vanished in order to avoid having to lie or be vulnerable himself lmfao? (I mean, probably not, but the thought is v. funny.)
On the other hand, Dick's silence as a type of honesty and vulnerability in and of itself... We know that as much as Dick likes teasing Tim, he also likes to comfort him, to be that figure of strength and reassurance to him. For him to be the one asking Tim if he's scared in the first place, and then not be able to scrape up anything more than "yeah, hope it doesn't get as bad as literal D-Day" and foreboding silence when Tim admits that he is scared...
It makes me think of that contrasting moment in Murderer/Fugitive later on, where Dick does tell Tim the comforting lie, that he'll always be safe with Batman and Nightwing, that everything will be okay, and desperately wants Tim to believe it.
No such comforting lies in No Man's Land, apparently.
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mytheoristavenue · 5 months ago
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MHA Mezo Shoji x Reader - Make Believe - VII
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Summary: You ask Shoji to pretend to be your boyfriend for a dinner with your parents.
Warnings: mutual pining, fake dating trope, only one bed trope, nsfw, virgin!reader, virgin!Shoji, use of his quirk, mentions of scars, size difference, mentions of oral (fem receiving), heavy petting, angst, fluff
The night hours began to tick by as tried to wind down, doom scrolling on your phone. Every so often, your eyes would flick to the floor to the left of your bed- or more specifically, Shoji, still naked from the waist up, save for his mask. He laid on his back, having laid out his towel to rest on, also on his phone. You couldn't help but steal glances at his bare form, though it made you feel incredibly perverted. Your breath would hitch nearly every time he shifted, thinking he'd caught you for sure this time. He stayed none the wiser.
"Think I'll probably get some rest soon," he eventually said sitting up and stretching his muscles, twisting and popping his back. "Got maybe a blanket and pillow I can borrow?"
"Shoji..." your eyes softened at him, but you turned your gaze away before your words could capture his attention. "I'm not actually gonna make you sleep on the floor..."
"It was my idea, you aren't making me do anything." He persisted. "It's fine, really."
"Let me rephrase," you sighed, crossing your arms stubbornly. "I'm not going to let you sleep on the floor." You flashed a momentary smile, before realizing he was staring back and you glanced back at the wall, patting the spot beside you as you scooted over. "Get up here."
"I'm seriously good, (Y/N)," Shoji insisted, shaking his head. "The floor's actually pretty comfortable," he lied. "And if you don't have bedding to spare, I'll survive."
"Shoji," you warned, shooting him a glare. "Don't make me say it again." Sighing and giving in, he picked himself up off the floor, dusting himself off and scooping up the towel before draping it over the footboard. Hesitantly, he sat on the bed, legs still dangling. "Get under the covers, you'll weigh them down if you sleep on top." You said, swallowing at the way his body heat tickled your skin. Bashfully, he did so, lifting up the quilt and shimmying under it.
"Now, I think we should set some ground rules," you continued, trying not to let the lamp light show your red cheeks. "No cuddling, no touching, we sleep back to back, got it?"
"Right," he agreed, nodding and swallowing hard. "It'd be weird if that happened, considering we're not really dating."
"Yeah," you replied halfheartedly, rolling over as he did the same. You couldn't help but blush at the sensation of his bare spine against your clothed one. For a moment, you wondered if he'd notice if you lifted your shirt to feel his skin on yours. You promptly shook the idea out of your head when you noticed him trembling, lying stick straight.
"Shoji, is everything alright?" you asked, concerned, rolling back over and propping yourself up on an elbow.
"Yeah," he answers sheepishly. "It's kinda embarrassing." He chuckled.
"Tell me," you pressed, laying a hand on his forearm to see over his hulking form.
"My left arms fell asleep." he laughed nervously. "I'm not really used to sleeping on my side, I can usually only get comfortable sleeping on my back with my arms stretched out." He explains awkwardly. "I'm sure it'll be fine, though. If I get too uncomfortable, I'll go back to laying on the floor."
You felt terrible, you were so focused on your own comfort, that you forgot to take into account his. Of course, he wouldn't be able to sleep with his back to you, having three arms to lay on. "I'm so sorry, Shoji! I didn't even consider how your quirk must make mundane things difficult for you!" you worried, pawwing at his arm as he sat up with you. "I didn't mean to be so selfish!"
He waved you off, sctraching the back of his head, while trying not to fluster at your touch. "It's really okay, I totally understand. I guess I'm just built different," he laughed. "Literally."
"Maybe we should cuddle..." you suggested almost silently, twiddling your thumbs and staring at your lap.
"Hmm?" he hummed questioningly, glancing over and tilting his head.
"I-If we cuddle," you continued bashfully. "You can lay on your back and stretch out your arms, and I can lay on one of them." You explained. "Otherwise I could sleep with my head near your feet but..."
"Yeah let's not do that," Shoji joked. "But if you wanna cuddle we can..."
"I-it doesn't count though, it's not real, remember?" You said, more to reassure yourself than him.
"Right," he nodded, laying back as you pulled the cover back up. Once he was fully stretched out, you began to get comfy, snuggling up to his side. His top arms rested behind his head, his middle right supported yours, and middle left rested on his stomach along with bottom middle. The last one- the bottom left, snaked around your waist as his eyes fluttered shut, pulling you a bit closer with hand resting on your hip. Shoji could feel you become rigid under his fingertips, eyes snapping open and removing his hand. "S-Sorry, I-"
"I-It's okay," you interupted. "You can put it back..." To your relief, his hand crept back up to where it was before.
"This okay...?" he asked reluctantly, thumb ghosting circles over your pajama bottoms. You hummed in response with a nod. "Good," he replied sleepily. "I want you to feel good." Your head darted up to look at him, face entirely red. "I-I didn't mean anything weird! I mean like comfortable! I-i wanted to make sure you were comfrotable!"
Secretly, Shoji did want to make you feel good. Though it'd kill him to admit it, he was head over heels for you and was a victim to every emotion that came with that. Even the ones that left him pawing at himself in the dead of night, your name in whispers on the air around him. It was true that he had fallen for your kindness, power, and reckless care for others, but your evey thought left static on his skin.
It didn't help matters that you did not possess a single phyhsical attribute that Shoji disliked. He'd never consider himself as having a type, but if he did, you'd be the spitting image of it, and ervery good look he got at you reduced him to jelly. That's what landed him in this mess in the first place, an hour from home in borrowed clothes with a harsh sentance of detnetion surely awaiting his return. All you had to do was flash him that sugary sweet smile and bat your lashes and he was doomed.
"This is nice..." your voice shattered his thoughts and his attention returned to the present. "I wnder if it'll feel this nice when get to do it for real with someone."
A part of him wanted to lie and tell you it wouldn't feel nice with anyoen but him, irritated at the thought of someone else holding you, but he knew it'd be wrong. In the end, he compromised. "It probably will," she said sheepishly. "But one of the best parts of my quirk if that I give good hugs so..."
"You do give the best hugs..." you confirimed, voice tired and threatening to drift off.
"You know, if you ever want more hugs form me..." he trailed, unsure what he even planned to say. "Just ask..."
"As much as I love your hugs, Sho," you yawned, too lazy to even finish the last syllable of his name. "Think we should maybe spend some time apart when we get back."
Your noncahalant attitude about suggesting the two of you take a break from one another made his blood run cold and he couldn't keep his composure. "W-Why? Why would you want that?"
Your gaze shifted up to him questioningly. You'd hardly ever seen Shoji had strong emotions about anything so it unnerved you that he'd been so on edge all night. "What's with you?" you asked, perhaps a bit more accusitorily than you had to."
"What's with me?" He said, taken aback and confinscating his grasp on your hip, though if it was meant to be some sort of punishment or not, he couldn't decide. "What's with you?"
"Me?" You retorted, sitting up fully, officially offended.
"Yeah, you." He sassed back, also sitting up, towering over you, even hunched. "What, you just wanna go home and not be friends anymore or something? You know, for a fake relationship, this kinda sounds like a break up."
"A break up?!" you shouted in a hushed tone, so as not to wake your parents. "Shoji, we're not together! I just meant that someone has already probably started a rumor about us being gone together, if we cool it on spending time together, it might go away quicker!"
Swallowing hard, realizing he gravely misunderstood your intention, but still hurt, Shoji swung his legs over the edge of the bed, back facing you. "I still don't understand why you think I'd want that..." he trailed quietly, demeanor suddenly even tamer than usual.
"You wouldn't wanna nip a rumor that we were dating in the bud?" You asked skeptically. "You know how our classmates are, Shoji. We'd never hear the end of it."
"Not if it weren't a rumor..." he half confessed, peaking over his shoulder at you before glancing away.
You were befuddled and terribly confused. "What do you mean by that?"
He man sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You drive me insane, you cannot possibly be this dense." His words cut you deeply, but you had no time to confront him as a pair of disembodied lips slithered over to you, doing the talking for his. "If you're embarrassed to be seen with me, you can just say that." He snapped, arms all crossed, save for the one that was tearing into you at the moment.
"S-Shoji, why would you think that?" you sstuttered out, tears welling in your eyes.
"Because at this point, you're the only one that this isn't real for. It's real to me, okay? "He sounded exhausted, voice hoarse anbd cracking with raw emotion. "You can't pretend not to know how I feel about you, it's so obvious."
You gulped, confused with heart racing. "Let's say for a moment that I don't..." you prod, hoping he'd shed light on things. An exhaserbated sigh came from him as he turned around to face you, dark and typically cold eyes glossy and over flowing with emotion.
"I'm obsessessed with you, (Y/N)." He stated, voice ragged like he'd run a marathon. "I'm head over heels for you and I always have been!"
"S-Shoji, I-" He didn't even give you a moment to respond, yanking his mask down in a fit of desperation, and crawling across the bed ot you, pressing his naked lips you yours at long last. You froze against him, rigid and unsure of what to do. Shoji had always been the special person you wanted to share your firsts with, but if you kissed him back this time, it would make it your first official kiss- was it the right time? The right place? Could you replay this moment forever in your head and feel fuzzy everytimne from it?
Reguardless, your body betrayed your rational thought, throat releasing a starved whimper as your lips smooshed against his with almost the same amount of need that he displayed. Eyes fluttering open, you were met with an unfirmiliar sight as you parted from him, panting. He did this same, catching his breath as he rested his forehead against yours, tension from hiding his feelings finally releasing with his exhale.
"I-I've never..." you began, stare glued to the bottom of his face. "I-I've never...seeen you without your mask before..." I admit quietly. Shoji's eyes blew wide as seperated from you the same way he had in the kitchen earlier, this time slapping a thick hand over his lips. He turned his back on you again, cursing himself for being so impulsive, all the while fumbling to stretch the fabric back over his chin.
Your hand found his forearm and you crawled closer hoping to comfort him. "I-I'm so sorry, I don't know what came over me." he stressed, wrestling his mask back on. "Fucking thing..." he muttered angrily.
"M-Mezo..." You murmured, hoping the sound of his given name would catch his attention. Luckily for you, it did. He froze, still facing the wall for fear of being perceived by you.
"Y-Yeah...?"
"Let me see you..." you plead, trying to pry him towards you, hands on his biceps.
"I-I can't," he mumbled, shrinking into himself. "You'll think I'm a freak, I-"
"Mezo," you said again, more sternly this time. "Please? How am I supposed to kiss lips I've never seen?" The idea of you wanting to kiss him again seemed to spark hope in him, but it wasn't quite enough to fully chip away at his conviction.
"You'll never want to kiss me again if you saw what I looked like." He argued weakly, fingers grazing over his face.
"I'm willing to take that risk." you reassured only to be met with a swift:
"Well, I'm not."
Sighing, you stood up, creeping over to his side of the bed, standing in front of him, looking as if he were holding his face together in his hands. Gently, you took him by the wrists, prying the modesty away form his features. Hesitently, he let you, looking up at you as if he were a child trusting you to fix a beloved toy.
Once you had him unveiled, your heart skipped a beat and your breath hitched. His lips were wide, wider than that of a typical looking person, forming what you'd imagined would be the biggest, most dazling smile. Decorating his lips was a myriad of scars, though you couldn't possibly guess what could have cause them and you didn't intend on asking. You gingerly ran the pad of your thumb over a few, noting that they were deep and raised. Lastly, teeth, you noticed, were perfectly straight and ivory white and even though there was hardly a soul alive that had seen them, it was obvious that Shoji took great pride in his oral hygeine.
"Say something..." he begged and you watched his lips move, entraced in his appearance.
"Mezo..." There was his name again, sending chills down his spine with the airy way it fell out of your mouth. "You're so beautiful..." you said, unblinking, admiration not wavering in the slightest.
He had half a mind to come up with some smart alick remark, but he hadn't the time as he felt your lips brush across his, pressence ghostly and barely there. A part of him still longed for the comfort and modesty of his mask, but he was putty in your hands and he knew it, there was no way he was getting away from you so easily after everything he'd said.
"T-Thank you..." he choked out between kisses so delicate they could hardly be called such at all.
"I know nothing could ever make you feel confident in your looks after what you've endured that lead you to hide it but for what it's worth," You soothed, still standing between his legs cradling his head in your hands as he sat in front of you. "You really are just so pretty, Sho..."
It was as if that word made something inside him snap, jumping up, towering over you and pinning you to the wall opposite him. His lips instantly found yours in a needy kiss as his arms scooped you up. "C'mere," he muttered against your mouth as a second pair of lips brushed against your nape, lost in your hair as it peppered kisses on the back of your neck.
"M-Mezo..." you whimpered between hungry kisses, writhing in his grasp.
"This is all your fault..." he sighed against you, not letting go of your kiss for anything. "I told you, you drive me insane," You couldn't help but let your head fall to the side as you moaned, giving his second mouth more real estate on your throat. "Now I'm all riled up and I can't contain myself..."
You had never in a million years imagined the words he was blessing you with. Sure, you'd fantasized about him in a sexual way, but you never pegged him for the verbal type, yet here he was. He'd always somehow had a knack for making you blush but with the way he spoke to you, so deserate, yet stern at the same time made your knees weak as they buckled from beneath you.
"Careful there, baby," he cooed, catching you, reflexes sharper than ever. "Don't think I'm gonna go easy on you just because you can't stay standing." You didn't even have it in your to respond with proper words, simply groaning in his grasp. "What's the matter, baby?" He whispered, breath ragged against your face.
"M-Mezo..." you sighed, back threatening to slide down the wall if he weren't supporting you.
"I hear you," he grinned wickedly, pivoting backwards and laying you on the bed, looming over you. "Loud and clear." He studied your form, button up pajama shirt lifted up on your tummy, pink frilly duvet puffed around you. "Just let me take care of you, I've waited so damn long for this."
As soon as you nodded with permission, several pairs of disembodied lips descended upon you, sticking kisses to any exposed flesh they could find. One pair tickled your stomach with ghostly brushes, but never dared to ask for more real estate to work with. He wanted to give you the control, let you decide when and what you show him.
"Your skin's so soft," he murmured against it, though you were unsure where the voice had come from. "Can't wait to have it in my teeth."
His words flustered you infinitely further, nerves puppetting your arms up to sheild your face with your palms. "M-Mezo..." You whined again, unable to form little more than his name.
"I'm here," he replied, grounding you back into the moment as you zeroed in on where the words came from- his true mouth, above you, watching your writhe beneathe him. "Not going anywhere, I swear."
Your hands wiped down your face and sunk below your jawline, resting on your throat for a moment. You watched as he smirked, pearly teeth glistining in the moonlight that peeked through the window. "I'm afraid your gonna have to be patient if you want me to choke you," he teased, knowing well that that wasn't want was on your mind- well it was now, at least. "You'll get everything you want, I promise, just be patient for me, baby." He leaned back letting his lips press against your forehead.
"D-Don't patronize me..." you finally said, pouting as your fingers trailed beyond your collarbone and landed on the top button of your shirt.
"Oh, baby," he cooed, softening on his playfulness, realizing you were willing to share something special with him. "Do you wanna show me something?" You very timidly nodded before glancing to your right, embarrassed and having second thoughts already. That was until be began to dote on you, sealing your fate. "You're so generous, willing to share your body with me..." he sighed, lowering to his knees, still hovering over you, while scopping you up in his clamshell of an embrace. "I'll make sure to cherish it, however much or little you decide to give."
His words pulled on the strings of your desire, making you want to immediately strip fully, donating yourself to him, but you resisted. Trembling, your fingers worked your top button, spurred on by the gasp that escped his lips when the two sides of the attachment laid seperate against your sternum. One by one, they all came undone until your chest and stomach were one collumn of plush skin, framed by patterned cotton on either side. Your ribs heaved, rising and falling with anticipation for his reaction.
Shoji stared down at you with all the admiration of a devoted follower praying to a holy relic. He studied the way shadows and hightlights danced across your newly unvieled skin. "Say something..." you begged, just like he had earlier. "D-Don't just stare..."
"Theres nothing I could possibly say," he replied, making your heart sink, arms insticutally rising to protect your modesty. To your shock, your wrists were instantly pinned to either side of your head. "Don't hide from me, I wasn't finished." He warned softly, thumbs grazing over the veins that ran down your wrists. "Theres no words that could possibly begin to describe how you look right now but..." he paused, head dipping down to lay kisses on your ribs. "I'd die a happy man if I could spend the rest of my life staring at you until I could make some up."
You had never expected Shoji to be so elloquent. Everything he said or did made you feel like the only girl on the entire planet, you felt increadibly special here beneathe him. Your thoughts of his articulation, however, were shattered by the sensation of a long wet tongue slobbering a stripe from your belly button upwards, hooking under your right breast, tickling you in a terribly lewd manner. Your breath hitched and no amount of self control could have ever stifled the embarrasing moan that slipped into the air. "Me-Mezo!" You cried, overstimulated tears pricking your screwed shut eyes.
You could feel him chuckle against your skin as he sloppily made out with the crevice under your breast, teeth nashing against the curvature of it where most of the weight rested. To him, it was heaven or better, having your still partially obscured tit resting against his face, supple skin under his tongue. "Mezo..." you crooned, craning your neck upward, fruitlessly trying to find his gaze. "T-Touch them..." you granted permission, only to have him refuse your request, chuckling darkly.
"You gotta take it off for me if you want more than this," he teased, nuzzled into your ribcage. "I'm only workin' with what you give me, baby. Ball's in your court." With that, you promptly wiggled out of your shirt, tossing it in a direction you didnt care to look for, before laying back down, blushing at the way he ogled you as your breasts settled against your chest. "Shit..." his breath hitched as he stared hungrily at your nake torso.
"T-Touch me, please, Mezo?" you plead, batting your lashes up at him. His hands were on you in an instant- all of them. Fingers gripped your hips, carressed your ribs, kneaded your tits, touched you everywhere all at once. The delicious and foriegn stimuli overwhelmed your senses immediately, extracting strings of vulgarity from your vocal chords. Shoji revelled in your songs, eyes half lidded and full of desire as his digits tickled you in the best ways.
"Like that, pretty thing? Like my fuckin' hands all over you?" He smirked, drunk on the moment as his fists closed around any flesh they could find.
"Y-Yes, God, yes!" you cried, squirming under him, only to have him press a firm hand to your sternum to hold you still.
"Stop fucking moving," he commanded with an arroused and cracked laugh. "Let me look at you, baby." You froze at his words, desperate to do anything to get him to shower you in praise again. "Shit, so pretty..." he cooed, dipping down to trail kisses down your chest and tummy before two extra mouths appeared from the hands that girpped you moments ago. Before you had time to question, you gasped, back arched like a cat as you felt tongues and teeth enclose on your nipples simultateously.
"F-Fuck..!" you hissed, throwing your head back as tears bricked your eyes. "M-Mezo!"
"I know baby," he hushed, ghosting his lips over your gaped mouth, pressing a kiss to your bottom lip. "Shhhh, just relax, baby, let me suck on these pretty tits..." He soothed as your mind began to melt fromall the new feelings you were experiencing.
Your lip quivered as he continued to pepper it with kiss as he felt you up. For a moment, you elevted to suck it between your jaws, only to be stopped by Shoji. "Ah ah, better not..." he cooed, taking it into his teeth, nipping at it softly and pulling it towards him, chuckling darkly all the while.
The action sent chills down you spine and you began to wonder if he'd down this before. "M-Mezo...h-have..." you trail off, not only unsure if it was a question you wanted answered but also if you could form the words at all.
"Hmm?" He hummed in response, paying you hardly any mond as his kisses began to trail down your throat.
"H-Have you ever..." You began, only to be interupted.
"Never, you're my first, baby." He stated with reassuring firmness. "Never wanted anyone else, you should know better than that."
"I-I thought so..." you sighed, secretly relieved.
"That a problem, princess?" he murmured from the crook of your neck before draggin his tongue from your shoulder to your earlobe, which he nibbled when he reached it, pulling a sob from you.
"N-No!" you cried in an embarrasingly obsene manner. "Y-You just seem to know- ah!" You shuddered at his teeth on your ear. "J-Just what to do..."
"Thanks, baby," he smirked, hot breath in your ear as he spoke. "Unfortunately, I'm just a big pervert," he admitted in a low grumble, making you weak. "Read too much porn, ya know?"
"S-Shoji!" you shrieked, face heating infinitely further.
"What was that, princess?" he laughed, fingers crawling up to your throat as his fist closed around it increadibly gently. "Last name basis with my mouths on your tits? Cold..."
You thought you should pinch yourself. This had to be some sort of wet dream. You'd pinch yourself and wake up in your dorm, sweating with sticky thighs. None of this could be real. Your Shoji- a perv? A porn addict? No, it couldn't be possible. He was such a gentleman! He was kind and noble...and he currently had his hand around your delicate little throat.
"M-Mezo..." you corrected yourself. "I don't believe that..." You confessed shyly. "I can't, you're not a creep like that..."
"Oh, you're so wrong there," he cooed, his hips grinding against yours as he left bruises all over your shoulder and neck. "I'm a huge creep, for you specifially..."
Your head coninued to spin at his words, curious lust bubbling inside your tummy. "W-What...kind do you like?" You asked, barely above a whisper, wanting to take an interest in his desires.
"Of porn?" He asks, chuckling lightly as he raises back up to look at you. "Tentacle stuff, mostly." He admitted with a smirk. "Kinda obvious, I'd think. Just love the idea of taking someone from all different angles..." As if to prove his point, one of his spare hands left your skin, slitherng down your body, easing up as it reached your crotch, ghosting over your heat. "You want me to touch you, baby?"
"M-Mhm..." you nodded, mind plague with the image of Shoji in his room, in the dead of night, fucking into his fist, reading hentai of things that look like him desimating girls that look like you. Once again, he brings you back to the present with the sensation of a tongue pressed against your pajama shorts. Gasping, you tense beneath him, virgin body unaccustomed to the new feeling. "A-Ah!"
"Like that, pretty girl?" he asked, voice muffled as they moved against the fabric to talk..
"Y-You don't have to use that mouth to talk..." you pout, squirming under the cage that was his body.
"I know I don't," he replied, chuckling against you, the vibration making you cry out. "But it's so fun to see you wiggle around..."
"D-Don't toy with me, Sho..." you pout, looking up at him with sugary tears in your eyes. "Take 'em off..."
Unseen fingers hook around the hips of your shorts, threatening to inch them down before they halted, pulling them back up even m,ore securely with a gentle pat. "Nah, don't think you're ready." He teassed. "I know I'm a rookie at this stuff, but from what I've read, you're supposed to be begging me to eat this pretty cunt, and you're not so..."
You wanted to smack him, punch him, scold him for talking down to you as you shrunk into yourself. Reguardless, your need for him betrayed your pride. "P-Please...?" you choke out, humiliated tears threatening to spill down your red cheeks.
"Please what?" he grinned, eyeing you mischeviously.
"P-Please...eat me..."
"Eat you? Baby, thats called cannibalism and it's illegal in Japan." He responded, chuckling at your flustered frustration. Suddenly, to his suprise and delight, you reached forward, running your fingers through his tusseled, silvery hair, collecting fistfuls of it, before shoving his face between your legs.
"M-Mezo, just eat my pussy already, please!" You wept, unable to take anymore of his teasing. The look he gave in response would have sent you into cardiate arrest as his eyes darkened with desire. You jumped at the feeling of his teeth nicking your clit as the pulled the soiled fabric away.
"Don't have to tell me twice..."
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soshirohoshinasimp · 4 months ago
Text
Soshiro Hoshina when you size him up
inspired by: @Yoredoesmore (
Tw: Slight suggestive material, fluff, kissing, language. 
Wc: 701
Genre: Fluff/suggestive?? (does it count…?)
Note: sorry for any mistakes, once again typing on my phone.@jjkamochoso-main @imthecosmicbasball
Vice Captain Soshiro Hoshina, known to you as your boyfriend, had just wrapped up a grueling day battling kaiju, buried under a mountain of reports in his office. As a tech specialist for the department, your day involved monitoring and checking kaiju vitals. Having the desire to see your boyfriend again, you made up some bogus excuse to go see him. Skipping over to his office, you head into his office before knocking. “Excuse me, you have to knock before coming into my office!” he scoffed. “The fucking audacity”   You found him amidst the paperwork, despite his anger you entered with a smile.
His face lit up at the sight of you. "Oh, it’s just you Y/N-chan~!" he greeted cheerfully, before his expression returned to its stoic demeanor, diving back into the reports spread across his desk.
You approached softly, while he asked, "Why are you here, Y/N-chan?" His gaze remained fixated on the paperwork as you replied, "Just wanted to check on you, Vice-Captain Hoshina. Everything okay?"
"Shits tedious," he muttered, gesturing towards the stacks of documents. "Gotta do reports, which is so boring." His tone softened noticeably when he mentioned you. "But you always brighten up my day just by being here."
Wanting to lift his spirits, you decided to tease him playfully, knowing he found it cute when you did. You moved closer to his desk and got into a playful fighting stance.
"What are you doing?" he chuckled softly.
"Wanna go, bro?" you teased with mock confidence, throwing light air punches near his face. "Nah, you don’t want the smoke."
He simply looked at you with amusement, completely unfazed by your antics. "Yeah… you're probably trembling in fear by how intimidating I am," you teased further, pretending to throw an uppercut.
"Babe, sorry to break your heart. But you're not scary whatsoever," he countered playfully, regarding you with a look that suggested he found you adorable.
"Come on~! Boy, I'll have to let you know I am terrifying!" you continued to provoke him, maintaining your playful stance.
"Fine, if you insist," he finally relented, rolling back his chair and standing up. He went Into a mock fight stance.  
“Come at-” Before you could finish, he went at you
 with unsurprising speed that was as quick as a lightning bolt, he swiftly picked you up in a bridal hold, twirled you around, and placed you gently on his desk. You ended up facing him, with his hands firmly holding your waist, his face inches away from yours.
"Hey, that isn't fa—" you began, but he gently shushed you, leaning in closer.
"Guess I'll subdue ya," he murmured, releasing his left hand from your waist and gently placing it under your chin, urging you closer to him.
Caught off guard by his swift maneuver, you found yourself drawn in, inching closer to a kiss that seemed inevitable.
You could feel the heat spreading across your cheeks as his remaining hand slowly moved up from your waist to under your top, inching closer to your chest, , his fingers lightly grazing your skin.
 You opened your mouth to speak, but before any words could escape, his lips crashed against yours, silencing you in an instant. The intensity of his kiss was almost too much to bear, as if he couldn't get enough of you. Despite your best efforts to stay composed, your body began to betray you, responding to his touch with an almost primal desire. 
He pulled you closer, his arms encircling your waist.
 His kisses grew more demanding, his tongue exploring the depths of your mouth as he deepened the embrace. You could feel the heat radiating from his body as he pressed against you, his hands wandering over your body, igniting a fire within you that you couldn't ignore. 
Any sounds you made were muffled into his mouth. 
Oh god, hes really not going to do it with you in here, right...?
—-------------------------------------------------------------
 Note: (thinking about making a series? Would it work?)
Note July 5th: Oh my gosh, I just realized my work is similar to another person's work. So I made a lot of changes and put their name at the top, so you can see their great work too.
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rpmemes-galore · 4 months ago
Text
Chappell Roan : The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess album ... sentence starters
tw for some sexual content and language
"Is it casual now?"
"You're losing it lately."
"I'm so sick of online love."
"It's gonna cause a scene."
"You wonder why I'm bitter…"
"I just wanna get to know ya."
"You coming home with me?"
"We're hot, we're drunk, wow."
"Won't make my mama proud."
"Mini skirt and my go-go boots."
"But I can't help what I can't help."
"Baby, why don't you come over?"
"Let's make this bed get squeaky."
"So slow down, sit down, it's new."
"Got so close, but then you lost it."
"Oh my god, you are heaven sent…"
"If karma's real, hope it's your turn."
"It's comical, the bridges you burn."
"Should've listened to your friends."
"If I didn't love you, it would be fine."
"Fell in love with the thought of you."
"So, baby, let's get freaky, get kinky."
"I thought you thought of me better."
"It's hot when you have a meltdown."
"Do you picture me like I picture you?"
"She showed me things I didn't know."
"Every place leads back to your place."
""Here we go, again. Everything is fine."
"Not overdramatic, I know what I want."
"And he was wearing these fugly jeans."
"Touch me, baby, put your lips on mine."
"Wishing you the best, in the worst way."
"This is what I wanted, this is what I like."
"Oh, some good girls do bad things, too."
"Can't be a good, good girl even if I tried."
"I try not to care, but it hurts my feelings."
"I love a little drama, let's start a bar fight."
"It's all in my head, but I want non-fiction."
"You're hating yourself, I'm feeling myself."
"I know you want it, baby, you can have it."
"I could be the one, or your new addiction."
"Never waste a Friday night on a first date."
"Now I'm choked up, face down, burnt out."
"I've been a good, good girl for a long time."
"But, baby, I like flirting, a lover by my side."
"So, now when we kiss, I have anger issues."
"I don't want the world, but I'll take this city."
"Could go to hell, but we'll probably be fine."
"Every night's another reason why I left it all."
"Got what you wanted, so stop feeling sorry."
"Ruined my credit, stole my cute aesthetic…"
"'Cause if we do coffee, it's never just coffee."
"I try to be the chill girl but, honestly, I'm not."
"We're leaving the planet and you can't come."
"People say I'm jealous, but my kink is karma."
"You'll say that you're sorry. I know that's a lie."
"Can't meet you for dinner at the Italian place."
"Um, can you play a song with a fucking beat?"
"Here come the excuses that fuel the illusions."
"That’s my type of fun, that's my kind of party."
"Who can blame a girl? Call me hot, not pretty."
"You don't have to stare, comе here, get with it!"
"I guess we could pretend we didn't cross a line."
"And you're getting pissed off, it's getting me off."
"'Cause everything good happens after midnight."
"If you really wanna leave, I'll never make you stay."
"No need to be hateful in your fake Gucci sweater."
"To think, I almost had it going, but I let you down."
"No one's touched me there in a damn hot minute!"
"I'm feeling kinda freaky, maybe it's the moonlight."
"I'm feeling kinda freaky, maybe it's the club lights."
"There's no one else who could. the only one is you."
"You sent him pictures and playlists and phone sex."
"I heard you like magic. I've got a wand and a rabbit."
"I kinda wanna kiss your girlfriend, if you don't mind."
"We've done this before, and I don't need it anymore."
"It's not attractive wearing that dress and red lipstick."
"If it hasn't happened, yet, then maybe you should go."
"Who knew that we'd let it get this bad when it ended?"
"He doesn't have what it takes to be with a girl like me."
"I hate that I let this drag on so long, you can go to hell."
"My friends call me a loser, 'cause I'm still hanging around."
"Baby, do you like this beat? I made it so you'd dance with me."
"I'm too scared to say half of the things I do when I picture you."
"Nothing good happens when it's late and you're dancing alone."
"And you're getting called out, 'cause you're running your mouth."
"'Cause if we have wine, 'cause if we have wine. I know that's a lie."
"Lying to your friends about how he's such a goddamn good lover."
"What's it take to get your number? What's it take to bring you home?"
"Should've listened to your friends 'bout his girlfriend back in Boston."
"Knee deep in the passenger seat and you're eating me out, is it casual now?"
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cyripticchronicler · 4 months ago
Note
i haven’t request before so i apologise if i’ve done anything wrong 😭
sirius finding out about james & regulus’ relationship so he asks out james’sibling!reader for ‘revenge’ but falls for reader hard.
it’s absolutely fine if you don’t do this, just thought i’d request and i love your fics 🤍🦇
Accidental Love
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Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Potter!Reader
Summary: Sirius can't erase the image of Regulus and James together. And he knows that the only way to put out the flame of anger in his chest is through you.
A/N: This is my longest fic yet ahaha. It was a lot of fun and I hope you enjoy! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get to your requests, I've had so many things to write! To all the other people who have requested, I'll get to them as soon as I can. I love you all and you deserve great things xx (Yes that's a Pride and Prejudice (2005 version) quote at the end of the fic)
TW: Swearing, Sirius is kinda a dick, mention of Sirius' bad parents, kissing, not proofread (please tell me of any mistakes)
Masterlist
The red hot betrayal stings Sirius’ tongue and poisons each gulp of water he forces down his throat in an attempt to control his growing anger. His hands shake, fisted at his side, yet he can’t draw his eyes from the scene in front of him. 
His best friend and brother, laughing and holding hands like it was completely normal to see the two together. Sirius isn’t sure why the sight in front of him hurts so bad. Maybe it’s because it’s his brother, one he’s never had a good relationship with because of his parents always pushing them apart, laughing so easily and carelessly with his best friend. Or maybe it’s because it’s James, one of his best friends, the one he tells everything, keeping this relationship with his brother a secret. 
He probably looks insane, sitting alone in the corner of The Three Broomsticks, anger rolling off of him in waves. He’s not sure what to do. Does he go up there and confront them? Does he pretend like he saw nothing? Logistically, he knows it would be better to walk away, take a moment to gather his thoughts, but he just can’t get the image of them out of his mind, can’t get the taste of betrayal off of his tongue. 
So he forms a plan, one he doesn’t let himself second guess. And he knows it’s going to work well, knows it’s going to hit James right where it hit Sirius because it involves you.
✰✰✰
You’re none the wiser to the plans and strategies forming in Sirius’ head, leaning against the armrest in the Gryffindor common room as you chat adamantly about all the Transfiguration homework that has been set. 
Alice, smiling at how worked up you get over the class, listens eagerly to your complaints, butting in when it feels right. Lily on the other hand, taking up all the space on the sofa with her long legs, pokes at your arm in an attempt to shut you up, having heard you complain on the way to the grand hall this morning. 
“How about instead of complaining, you actually do the homework,” She teases, giggling as Alice hits her leg playfully. Your face scrunches in confusion, head tilting to the side ever so slightly. “I’ve already done the homework.”
Alice and Lily gawk at you. Huffing out a laugh, Alice grins teasingly. “Then what’s all this complaining for? You’ve been talking non-stop for half an hour about this bloody homework.” It’s your turn to smile, shifting so your feet are between Lily’s legs spread out on the couch, ignoring her annoyed yelp. “Just because I’ve finished doesn’t mean the amount wasn’t pure torture the whole time.”
You hear Lily’s smirk before you see it. “That sounds a little dirty. Who’s been torturing you, missy?” Your eyes widen, cheeks flushing even as you laugh. “Shush! My brother’s probably here somewhere, and I don’t think he’d like the thought of his little sister getting it on,” You grit through your teeth, scanning the crowded room to look for him. You sigh in relief when you see no sight of him.
“Oh please,” Alice pinches your cheeks. “No one would believe you’re getting it on. When a guy asks you out you just stare at them and wait until they take it back.” You swat her hands away and rub your red cheeks. “That is not true!” They just stare at you, eyebrows raised. 
Thankfully, you’re saved from having to defend yourself when someone pointedly clears their throat from behind you. Cringing at the thought of someone having heard your conversation, you turn around slowly, heart speeding up at the sight of none other than Sirius Black in front of you. 
You’ve stopped lying to yourself about the tiny, minuscule, crush you have on Sirius months ago. There’s no denying the speeding of your heart, or the way your cheeks flush when he so much as looks your way. But you’ve pushed those feelings away, deep down inside you to gather dust and hopefully one day, whither away.
You muster up your best smile and ignore the heat in your cheeks. “Hey, Sirius. I’m not sure where James is but I think Remus is in the library.” He smiles his usual, arrogant smile but it wobbles like it’s hard to hold. 
“I’m not here to see them. I’m here to see you.” Eyes widening a fraction, you attempt to get your thoughts in place, though it’s hard with the consistent poking of Lily’s finger on your arm. “Okay.” You take Sirius’ gesture to an emptier part of the room as a sign, awkwardly shuffling out of between Lily’s feet and trying not to trip. 
“What did you need to talk to me about?” Your hands fiddle nervously behind your back and you shift on your feet. Sirius reveals his picture-perfect smile, eyes crinkling in the corners. Smoothly, as if it were the most normal thing in the world, he places a cold hand on your shoulder, stopping your nervous movements. 
“I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me sometime? Just the two of us?” Time seems to stop, your breath getting caught in your throat. Through your shocked haze, the overthinking spiral begins just like it does when anyone asks you out. Sirius could be asking you out as a joke. Maybe James is pranking you. It’s most likely a dream, Sirius has shown no interest in you before. 
“You okay?” His amused voice snaps you from your over-thinking haze, eyes blinking rapidly at the sudden dryness. Back to the corner of the room, you’re able to spot Alice and Lily eyeing you curiously from their spot on the couch a few feet away. Alice notices your stare and provides an encouraging thumbs up, while Lily performs some crude motions with her fingers.
Frowning, you drag your eyes back to Sirius’ patient eyes. “Um,” Your tongue feels heavy inside your mouth. “Okay?” He lights up, eyes twinkling while an eager grin spreads across his face, showcasing his dimples. You try not to awe out loud. 
“Great! Does tomorrow in hogsmeade sound good? We’ll meet in the common room and walk down together.” You can’t do anything but manage a small smile and nod, overwhelmed with the amount of emotions hitting you. 
Sirius shoots you another smile, and perhaps if you paid more attention you would have noticed the guilt painted on his face, or the smell of revenge as he walked away.
✰✰✰
In the cool common room, morning light peeks through the framed windows and sheds a musky light throughout the empty space. You stand awkwardly in the middle, kicking the dusty carpet nervously with your shoe-clad feet. 
Your heart is beating wildly in your chest and you scratch at the inside of your wrist, a nervous habit you picked up years ago. You’ve been standing for at least five minutes now, no sign of Sirius. Your mind is racing and you begin to wonder if he’s even coming or not, but thankfully for you and your heart, the sound of footsteps break out behind you.
“Hey!” You whip around, a small smile on your face that reflects the glee in your bones. “Hi,” You whisper, letting him pull you in for a small hug, a mere touch of your shoulders before he’s walking slowly beside you. 
“I was thinking we could go shopping then maybe get a butterbeer?” The small grin that paints his face is noticeable through his voice. “I’d love that. Um-” You scratch your eyebrow in an attempt to clear your thoughts. “How are you?”
His hand moves to your back, guiding you down the windy path that leads to Hogsmeade, layered with early morning frost. Your hands, clad in gloves to beat the cold, fidget nervously with the straps of your bag. “I’m well. Been busy with school. Remus’ birthday is coming up so we’ve been trying to plan something for him. How about you?”
“I’m okay. I’ve been swamped with school work, and barely had enough time to paint.” 
“You paint?” He asks curiously. You nod. “Yeah, mostly realism but sometimes abstract.”
“I’d love to see your work sometime, I’m sure it's beautiful.” You blush for what seems like the millionth time today. “Maybe one day.” You don’t share your art much, only to close friends like Lily and Alice, but only the really good ones. Yet, you can see yourself sharing your artwork with Sirius. 
You continue to chat about your classes, chatting adamantly with each other. And it feels good. He seems to care, laughs and makes jokes at the right times, stares at you with increasing interest. 
But there’s a nagging feeling in your gut, something that won’t go away no matter how much candy from Honeydukes you eat. “You alright?” Sirius asks when you’re quieter than usual, staring off into space while trying to decipher the odd feeling. 
Sirius watches as a frown tarnishes your usually happy face, the guilt of what he’s doing, how he’s using you, nagging at him. Yet he can’t seem to stop, whenever he thinks of admitting what he’s doing the image of James and Regulus together stares back at him and makes it hard for him to open his mouth. 
“Sorry, I’m alright, Sirius. Just thinking.” His shoulder bumps yours, pulling you along to The Three Broomsticks. “About?” He grins, a certain spark in his eyes. You smile back. “Just things.” He pulls you to a stop right outside the entrance, moving down your sweater-covered arms until his hands are in yours. 
“You’re really pretty.” It’s true, but it doesn’t stop the pang of guilt, followed quickly by an image of James and Regulus hugging. You melt, flushing under his stare, that's swarming with so much admiration, you find it impossible to believe.
“Thank you. So are you.” Entering The Three Broomsticks, warmth and the smell of butterbeer greeting you. You're too absorbed in finding an empty table to notice the pink flush that covers the apple of his cheeks. 
Throughout Sirius’ lifetime, he’s never gotten many compliments. After leaving his family and moving in with James, Euphemia had given Sirius many motherly compliments. But coming from a beautiful girl who he’s treating unfairly, the compliment hits hard. 
But it still doesn't stop him from planning, scheming. How can he show James how it hurts? How does he make sure he feels the same pain and betrayal Sirius felt when seeing Regulus and him together?
Watching you, eyes lit up by the flickering candles that provide a romantic, peaceful aroma, he knows that it’s going to hurt you. Painfully hard. 
✰✰✰
“How are you doing, Padfoot? Moony and I came up with another prank to get back at Malfoy. Are you up for it?” James speaks so casually, resting against the pillows on his bed while he reads a book about quidditch, it’s hard to think he’s keeping a secret. If Sirius had not seen it with his own eyes, he wouldn't have thought anything was out of the ordinary. 
“No.” He responds gruffly, shrugging on a leather jacket and pulling rings on his fingers. “You okay, Pads?” Remus asks and he finally looks up, noting the frown that pulls at both of their faces. “I’m fine.” His voice is noticeably softer when pointed at Remus.
“Where are you going?” James asks with a small, hesitant smile and Sirius can’t help but feel guilt at the anger he’s feeling towards an oblivious James. But he can’t bring himself to act nicer, can’t force a sweeter tone in his voice. “Date.”
“With who?” Your sister. “Someone.” Remus opens his mouth but he’s quick to cut him off. “Bye.”
Your first date with Sirius was a week ago and Sirius knew straight away what he wanted to do for the second date. Even though he’s doing it to get back at James, he can’t help but feel a pang of excitement at the notion of going on a second date with you.
Your smiling face greets him outside the common room, leaning against the wall across from the Fat Lady. “Hey, love.” You blush adorably at the nickname and Sirius eyes your nails as they scratch at your wrist. He grabs your hand before you can hurt yourself more.
You let him pull you down the moving stairs, your little giggles echoing off the stone walls. “Where are we going?” You ask, tightening your hold on his hand. “Painting.” Your eyes widen and you splutter in shock. 
“What?” Sirius can’t help but grin at the obvious excitement in your eyes. “I told you I wanted to see your artwork. I bought the supplies yesterday, figured we could have a picnic.” Your awe at this new side of Sirius, the side that plans special dates and puts effort into it. It was a nice day today and Sirius wanted to take advantage of the sunny weather before the snow that’s set to fall next week prevents them from going outside.
Sirius had shown no interest in you before. He’d been kind, sure, but you’d never had a proper, real conversation until he asked you out. Maybe that's why there’s still an odd feeling in your gut, maybe it’s because you know it’s weird he asked you out on a random day, without showing any interest in you before that. But for now, you blame it on overthinking and push those feelings away.
You chat aimlessly on the way to the Black Lake, fiddling with your skirt so you don’t do something stupid like grab his hand. After the end of your last date, you’ve both agreed to keep this dating thing a secret. 
The gasp you let out at the sight of the laid picnic has Sirius grinning, a proud sort of glee that rolls down his spine. He takes a seat next to you on the pink checkered blanket, sitting around the pile of food he prays you like. 
Passing you an empty canvas and a basket of paints, he watches as you sit and stare for a moment, contemplating. He doesn’t like the way his heart speeds up at the unmistakable beauty that is your face. So he ignores it. 
“What are you painting?” You grab the colors you need, mixing them on a fresh pallet. The ideas that come to you are clear as day, images of green, healthy trees next to a shimmering, blue lake where people are swimming in the early morning sun. You begin to paint before you forget. 
“Just a landscape. You?” You take a quick peek at his canvas, seeing he’s already added streaks of red and orange. “I have no idea. I don’t think I’ve ever painted before?”
“Ever?” You ask, the shock clear in your voice. You see him grin at you from the corner of your eye. “Never had the opportunity. No one in my family paints and James and Remus don’t.”
“Remus does actually, I ran into him once at this muggle painting class.” Sirius laughs. “Of course he’s painted before. He’s a man of many talents.”
You grin, brushing stray hair out of your eyes. Trying not to shiver at the cold wind, you begin to regret your decision of wearing a skirt and thin, long sleeve top. “He had the best art in the whole class, James couldn’t stop laughing at me when I came back with Remus behind me holding an award for best art.”
Sirius laughs, head throwing back at the thought of Remus’ smug face and your defeated one. “I guess you being siblings with James means you’re friends with all of his friends.” Your smile turns sad, voice quiet. “Yeah.”
Sirius frowns, momentarily stopping to gently nudge your shoulder. “What’s up?” You sigh, biting your lip. “It’s just…All of my friends- most of them, are really only friends with me because of James. Being friends with me would give them more opportunities to get with James, right?” You attempt a laugh though it’s not funny.
“I’m sorry.” His voice is genuine and when you look at him he’s already looking at you, eyes sparkling. You shake your head and look back down at your work. “Don’t be sorry, Sirius. You did nothing. And I have Lily and Alice, I don’t need anyone else.”
The guilt almost eats him alive. He feels physically sick at how you're going to react. At the fact he's doing something that’s going to hurt you badly. Your kind, beautiful soul doesn’t deserve this. 
He opens his mouth, ready to confess and face the backlash of you hating him, something he doesn’t know if he can handle but deserves. You beat him to it. “Don’t tell James, please. I don’t need him feeling guilty, it’s not his fault.” And now he can’t tell you. You’ve poured your heart out, confessed something you haven’t even told James. Maybe one day, when you grow to hate him and leave like they all will, will he tell you.
You continue to paint until the sun starts setting and casts a warm glow on the two of you. With your hair, now tied up in a messy bun and Sirius’ leather jacket around your shoulders, you look perfect in his head. He feels happy and free and he knows he’s looking at you weirdly, too soft for his usual harsh features but he can’t stop. 
So he looks away and shows you his painting of a terrible sunset where two people sit on a grassy field and watch as the sun makes room for the power of the moon. You show yours next, a painting worth the spot next to the Mona Lisa and Sirius makes sure to fawn over it, making sure you know your own worth. Afterwards, you eat and watch the sunset just like the couple in his painting. When you invite him sledding next week, he can’t bring himself to say no. Or to tell you the truth because that would mean losing you, and that’s something he just can’t handle. 
✰✰✰
“You ready, sweetheart?” Your laughter is music to his ears, a melody he’s not sure he could ever go without. It’s scary, how quickly you’ve grown on him, but he can’t bring himself to pull back. 
“I was born ready.” You’re holding a wooden sleigh beneath your armpit, fingers tapping along to a beat in your head as you trudge through the thick snow that fell overnight, the sunny weather from your last date nowhere to be found. 
You stop at the tip of a snowy hill, white frosting reflecting the sun in your eyes that you attempt to shield away with your gloved hands. “Let’s do this.” You grin teasingly at Sirius, holding up your sleigh. He copies you, hitting yours gently with your own. 
Placing the sleigh on the ground, he crouches down beside it with a furrowed brow. “How do we do this?” Your eyebrows raise in surprise. “You’ve never done this before?” He sheepishly smiles, scratching the back of his neck. “My family’s not one for things like sledding.” 
You know about his family history of course, James has been talking to your Mom and Dad a lot more recently, discussing how we could get Sirius to stay with us. You hope one day he can do all the things he wasn’t allowed to do. Him and Regulus deserve better. 
You know Sirius wouldn’t appreciate the pitying look on your face so you mask it with excitement and quickly teach him how to sit in the sleigh. “Race you.” You challenge once he’s ready before speeding down the steep hill, Sirius not too far behind you. Laughter fills the air, your hair whipping behind you. 
Once you reach the end with an abrupt stop, you roll onto the cool snow, making snow angels. Sirius’ face comes into view, blocking the sun from your squinting eyes and you grin, tongue between your teeth as you attempt to withhold your loud giggles. 
“I beat you!” And then he’s jumping down beside you, rolling over top of you to tickle your warming body. He’s greedy, wanting more of your laughter that seems to be his lifeline. “That was luck!” He insists, continuously tickling you until you tap out. 
Then you’re running up the hill again, sleigh behind you while Sirius follows. He’s barely in his sleigh before you’re speeding down the hill again, a whir of colors in the white cloudy snow. He attempts to catch up, a running head start proves useful when he’s speeding past you with an excited cheer. 
The abrupt stop has him falling into the snow that he pays no attention to, whipping around to try and decipher where you went, having lost you halfway down the hill. “Hello?” He yells into the open, empty air. He can’t see you anywhere, just pure white snow. 
Sirius frowns, standing up to look around. “Hello?” His heart is racing now, no sight of you anywhere. “Where are you?” Stomping through the snow, he runs up the hill to see if you’re there. You’re not. 
“Boo!”
Sirius jumps in fright, letting out a high pitched scream that has you doubling over in laughter. “You-You-” You mock his face, quiet laughs escaping your open mouth. Stomach hurting from how much you’ve laughed, you collapse to the floor again, this time bringing Sirius with you. He falls beside you, one hand holding his head up while he watches you die of laughter, smile on his chapped lips. 
Slowly, your laughter dies down, silence heavy in the air. You open your eyes to find him staring back at you and you sigh at the beauty of his face. The slope of his nail, sharp cut of his jaw and accentuated cheekbones. 
He’s like a force that can’t be defeated, leaning up on your elbows, nose grazing his. He smiles, hot breath hitting your plump lips. “Can I kiss you?” You’re not sure whether the words uttered were your own or his, but both of you eagerly lean into each other, lips grazing before he’s pressing them against yours. 
It’s heart stopping, a thrill racing down your spine and you press yourself harder against him, letting him grip your waist with his large hands. Sirius can’t think, can’t feel anything but your lips on his, warm and soft and perfect.
And he knows that he can’t ever tell you. He can’t tell you of his cruel, unforgivable actions because he knows now that you were the one he always needed. He won’t tell you anything.
✰✰✰
“Did you just smile at my sister?” James’ voice snaps Sirius out of his trance where he was thinking and looking at you. Whipping his head to face James, whose face is set in curiosity, Sirius merely nods. “We’ve become…Friends.”
He can’t help himself and sneaks another look at you where you sit not too far away, hands moving wildly in front of you whilst talking to Alice and Lily. He grins again. 
“Oh,” A knowing glint enters James’ eyes. Sirius ignores it. “I’m glad you’ve become…Friends.” James attempts to hide his smirk by drinking his orange juice. 
Sirius is too absorbed in you and the fact you’re walking near him to notice or care. He thinks he’s about to have a heart attack when you stop beside him, lips tingling in memory of the kiss from just yesterday. 
He feels his heart deflate when you direct your attention to James and not him. “You said you wanted to talk to me?” His eyes widen and he nods, shooting Sirius a quick, guilty glance before standing up from his seat. “Yeah, I want your advice on something. Can we walk?”
Your eyebrows furrow, curiosity reflecting in your eyes. You nod and follow him out of the great hall whilst shooting Remus and Sirius a parting smile. 
“I’m glad to hear you and Sirius are friends.” Hands in his uniform pockets, James is a ball of nervous energy. You blush at his words and the only response you can come up with is a quiet “yeah.”
You round the corner that leads to the courtyard. “I was thinking that since you and Sirius are now friends,” He exaggerates the word ‘friend,’ “I could get your advice on how you think he’d feel if he found out me and Regulus are dating.” The whispered last words have you stopping in your tracks, head whipping up to stare at James with wide eyes. 
“You’re gay?” James panics, whipping his head around and aggressively pushing you into an empty classroom. “Merlin, you don’t have to shout it.”
“James,” You can’t hold back your smile, “I’m so happy for you.” He deflates, eyes that once bounced around the room nervously now glint with unshed tears and he pulls you in for a tight hug. 
You hug him back tighter, squeezing in a way you hope annoys him. You mutter against his shoulder, “To answer your question, I think Sirius would be happy for you both. But he’s protective over Regulus, it might take time for him to get used to the idea.”
He pulls away, shaking your shoulder while he subtly wipes away a stray tear. “Okay, thanks, I keep panicking at the thought of Sirius hating me for dating his brother. He’s been ignoring me recently and I keep thinking it’s because he already knows.”
Your eyes widen, having a slight suspicion on why Sirius was ignoring James. “I’m sure it has nothing to do with you. Now we should go before we’re late for first period.” He shakes you aggressively, holding you by the shoulders in a brotherly way to annoy you. 
“Yes, go to class, little shit. I’m happy for you and Sirius, you know.” Wild heat blazes across your cheeks, heart growing louder in your ears. “I-I don’t-”
He’s out of the room before you can finish your sentence.
✰✰✰
“Let’s go before all the tables are full!” You’re pulling Sirius along, having to take large lunge-like steps to reach The Three Broomsticks quickly. Light snow, melting by each step, provides a slippery path to the entrance. 
Sirius has his hands on your hips, ensuring you don’t fall. He reaches past you to open the door, quickly guiding you in to ensure the heat does not escape. The tilt of his lips is felt against the shell of your ear, keeping you close against him. 
You giggle quietly, a flush warming your whole body. Sirius feels the exact same flush. He’s never felt so warm and happy. It’s all because of you. 
His body bumps into you when you abruptly stop in the middle of the building. Nudging his nose with your cheek - how easily he began to crave your touch a shock to even him - he follows your gaze, letting out a breath at the view he’s unwillingly seen a second time. 
James and Regulus. Noses touching. Hands touching. Staring only at each other. He wonders if that’s what you both look like, infatuated with each other, greedy with touches and absolutely disgusting to look at. 
“Do you-” Your voice, sweet as honey, snaps him out of his thoughts. “-want to sit with them?” Your voice is hesitant, nervous for his reaction. But a simple squeeze of his hand has him nodding and shuffling to the table where James and Regulus have finally noticed you both. 
He notices the way you separate from him so that you’re no longer touching. But, instead of focusing on that, he focuses on shooting his brother a strained, awkward smile. He’s never had the best relationship with his brother, something Sirius regrets deeply. 
The strain their parents caused with favoring one and abusing the other, had caused a rocky relationship that had been on the mend ever since Sirius had become friends with James and Remus. 
“Do you want to sit?” The sharp, blunt voice of his brother has him sitting and pulling you with him. Years of living together has given Sirius the talent of noticing his brother's nervous tics. The tick of his jaw and scrunch of his nose gave him away. 
It seems Sirius wasn’t the only one who noticed his nervousness because James, who still chats with you, places his hand on top of Regulus’. “How are you?” Sirius attempts, tongue heavy in his mouth. 
“Good.” Came his blunt reply. A tap of his hand from James has his jaw twitching. “How are you?” 
“Good.”
Silence
You, ever kind and understanding, would not settle for the awkward and kept the conversation going, conversing with James and Regulus, even attempting to include Sirius, who tried to join in for you. And Regulus. 
He watches the way James notes every expression on Regulus’ face, can read any sign of nervousness, stress, happiness, and he realizes he’s now not the only one who can read his brother. The skill that took Sirius years to master, James had learned in a much shorter amount of time. 
He frowns. “How long have you two been together?” Regulus answers, narrowing his eyes, threatening. “Three months.” James places a comforting hand on his shoulder and Regulus drops the glare. “What about you two?” He asks a lot more gently than Sirius asked. 
You, who watched the situation with an amused brow, flushed embarrassingly quickly. “Oh- we’re not-”
“We’ve been on three dates- four if you count this one. We’re still trying to figure it out.” Sirius replies smoothly. He’s surprised to find no hint of anger or betrayal on James’ face. Like he planned. But, he’s not disappointed at that fact. If anything, he’s relieved. Relieved James isn’t angry about this relationship because Sirius couldn't stay away from you if he tried. 
“I’m happy for you two.” You smile, kicking your brother gratefully under the table. A rare spark of amusement shines in Regulus’ eyes, a void of black. “Knowing you Sirius, I'm surprised you’re not pissed.” He leans forward on his elbows, tilting his head in a playful challenge. “You’re not secretly plotting to get back at us, are you?”
You laugh, turning to Sirius and expecting him to laugh too but he only looks down at his hands that grip his butterbeer, a flash of guilt that’s gone before it’s there. Your smile is tight. Wrapping your arm around Sirius’ arm, you go back to filling the silence. 
“Does Remus know?” James nods, licking the butterbeer off his lips. “Yeah, I needed advice on how to tell you,” He looks at Sirius. “I told him a month ago. That fucker told me he already knew.” 
You laugh, happy your brother is surrounded by such good people. Looking down in your hands, you note your drink is empty and sigh. “Does anyone want another drink?” The glasses in front of James and Sirius are empty while Regulus still nurses his drink. They both nod.
Sirius goes to stand up but you force him to sit with a hand on his shoulder. “Sit. I’ll go get the drinks while you three talk.” You widen your eyes, hoping Sirius gets the hint. Without leaving room for argument, you hurry to the bar to order more drinks, a giddy sort of excitement bubbling your blood. 
“Three butterbeers, please.” You grin, tapping your hands on the bench while you wait. “You and Sirius are cute.” You jump at a new voice, smiling at Marlene who takes the empty spot next to you while she waits for her drinks. 
“Thank you,” You whisper, flushed. She winks playfully at you. “So are Regulus and James. It’s annoying that they're gay, though. They’re so hot.” You laugh awkwardly, not knowing how to respond to someone talking about your brother like that. 
Fresh drinks in front of you, you’re about to head back to the table when Marlene says something that makes you pause. “I’m glad Sirius has finally gotten around to the idea of them together.” You tilt your head in confusion. “Finally? He just learnt of their relationship.”
It’s her turn to look confused. “No? I saw Sirius here like a month ago? He was staring all angry looking at them. I’m surprised steam wasn’t coming out of his ears. He just stood there for a good five minutes before he left, never got a table or anything.”
Your heart beats like crazy, a sinking suspicion forming in your mind. “What day was this?” Marlene smiles, unaware of the impending pain that she forces on your heart. “September 5th?”
The day Sirius asked you out. 
You’re not secretly plotting to get back at us, are you?
He was. 
Not wanting to go back to the table and face the truth just yet, you stand by the bar, listening to Marlene talk and pretending to listen. 
Sirius watches you, unable to keep his eyes off for more than a second. He forces himself to look away when he feels James staring at him though. “Yes?” 
“Don’t hurt her. She may act tough, but she’s sensitive.” James, face that’s usually all smiley and happy, is now set in a threatening glare, jaw clenched and Sirius knows he’s being serious. 
“I never want to hurt her.” It’s true. If the racing of his heart, the weird feeling in his bones, and the dizziness that fogs his mind whenever he thinks of you is any indication, he’s falling in love with you. But just because he wants to doesn’t mean he can go back in time and change his intentions for why he asked you out in the first place. He regrets it. The anger and betrayal that took over him was merely a passing emotion, replaced with happiness for both his brother and James. 
But just because his feelings about their relationship changed, doesn’t mean you would understand why he did it. 
✰✰✰
You’d been awfully quiet the rest of the night. And it’s hitting Sirus the wrong way. He knows something’s wrong but he doesn’t know what, nor does he know how to fix it. 
The light that you emitted was nowhere to be found, and you’ve kept yourself distant, ignoring all his attempts to touch you. 
“Are you okay?” He whispers in your ear, touching your hip gently. He frowns, heart panging when you flinch away from him. “I need to talk to you,” Your voice is a whisper, unable to be heard in the crowded common room if Sirius wasn’t so attentive to your every move. 
He nods, too aggressively to be considered normal. He watches you scratch your wrist and he lets you, not wanting to be rejected again. Or worse; you flinch back.
He follows you like a lost puppy, clambering up the stairs behind you until you’re in the empty hallway. You lean against the wall and he leans against the other one to give you space, wanting nothing more than to reach for your hand. 
“I-” You look down at your shoes, hiding your eyes from his wanting gaze. “I was talking to Marlene. She told me that you saw James and Regulus together like a month ago. And that you looked really angry.” It feels like a rock was stuck in his throat, he couldn’t swallow, couldn’t breathe. He knows where it’s going and he knows he can’t defend himself because it was all. His. Fault. 
“Then Regulus made a joke, you know the one about you plotting to get revenge. I mean,” You ran your hand through your hands nervously, feeling like there was a pack of bugs in your heart that were fighting to get out “you didn’t even laugh at the joke. It wasn’t that funny but you looked so…Guilty-”
He can’t look you in the eyes when he confesses. “I first asked you out to get back at James.” He swore he could hear your heart break. He could feel his own heart shatter when you started walking away, and he desperately ran in front of you to try and get you to stop. “I have to admit, at first it was merely a ploy to make James understand what I felt. Because I was so angry and I felt so betrayed. I didn’t mean to fall for you, but you’re so brilliant. You’re beautiful and smart, and I was selfish. I’m so sorry, baby.” 
He couldn't keep the agony out of his voice if he tried. His chest was rising and falling in hard breaths and he felt physically nauseous. You’re everything to him and you’re going to leave him. 
“Would you-” Your voice cracks and you clear your throat. “Would you have told me at all? That you used me?” His silence was enough of an answer. 
Your whole body shakes and your bottom lip wobbles. Salty tears roll down your cheeks and you cover your mouth, squeezing your eyes shut and shaking your head. No. He never even wanted you. He took advantage of your stupid crush and used you. A loud sob racks through your body and you turn away, unable to look at the man you had begun to fall in love with. 
“Please-” You managed to speak through gasped sobs. “Please, I can’t look at you right now.”
“I'm sorry-”
“Sirius.”
He walks off, taking your heart with it. The loss of his own heaving breaths told you he was gone and allowed you to finally collapse, falling back against the wall.
✰✰✰
You hadn’t left the girls dormitory in three days. Your heart weighs heavily in your chest and it holds you down, stopping you from going anywhere but your bed and the bathroom. Besides small bites of the food one of the girls had dropped off, you haven’t eaten much either. 
You feel pathetic. You wouldn’t be this worked up over any guy but it was Sirius, a man you’ve been crushing on for what feels like forever. And he used you. After you opened up, told him how you’ve been used multiple times because of James and he did the same thing. 
Three days in near total confinement, you’ve managed to analyze every moment with him. Every kiss, every touch, every look. Was any of it real? You’ve rubbed your cheeks raw from how much you’ve cried.
It hurts so bad and it seems to never end. It feels as though there's a big, gaping hole where your heart should be. 
“Hey, sweetie.” You lift your head from your tear-stained pillow, turning to face the door. Lily has just come back from classes, pretty red hair tied in a bun at the top of her head. She smiles one of her sweet, pitying smiles that only make you feel more pathetic. 
“Hi,” You mutter. She comes closer, stroking your hair and ignoring the knots. “James has come to see you.” 
You sit up so fast you begin to feel dizzy. “Fuck,” You whisper, pressing the palm of your hand against your forehead. “You think you could hold him off?” You already know the answer before she speaks. “I’m sorry. He’s been trying to see you ever since you never showed up for dinner three days ago. ‘Don’t think he’s going to take no for an answer anymore.”
“Okay,” You sigh, sitting up in bed and scrubbing your face. She kisses you on the forehead gently before going to get James who barges into your room almost immediately. “Are you okay?”
You scoff, giving him a smile while he practically forces you into a hug. “I’m fine.” Your voice is muffled by the fabric of his Quidditch shirt. With a disgusted sniff, you push him away from you. “Ew get away you stink.” 
He doesn’t listen and instead forces you against his shirt and you gag, hitting at his arms while he practically suffocates you. “I thought you were trying to comfort me, you piece of shit.” He finally lets you go and you gasp dramatically for fresh air. “I am comforting you. See, there's a small smile on your ugly face.”
“Fuck off,” You mutter, only half meaning it. His face turns serious. “Now, seriously, are you okay?”
You look down at your hands, nodding slowly. “Yeah. Did, uh, Sirius tell you what happened?” He frowns. “He did, had a fucking go at him afterwards.”
“James.” You scold. 
“But then,” He continued, “We talked. And he told me what happened, why he did it. Sure, it was a dick move but he seems really sad at the idea. He was on the verge of a panic attack, Remus had to calm him down. You don’t have to forgive him, but maybe it would help if you two spoke.”
“James,” You sigh, pulling at your hair as the pang of a headache pulses in the front of your brain. “He hurt me. He used me, I’m not sure if I’m ready to talk to him.” Gently, his hands move up to stroke your hair. “Okay, that’s okay. You don’t need to forgive him but I got a letter from Mom and she’s letting Regulus and Sirius stay with us for as long as they need.”
“Okay,” You blink, rubbing your eyes and laying back against the bed. “Can we talk about something else, I’m sick of crying.” He mockingly pouts though you know he really is worried about you. 
And then he’s pulling you in for another hug despite your physical protests. 
✰✰✰
It takes another five days to muster the courage to talk to Sirius. He’s sitting in the common room, staring into the fireplace that blazes with fire, eyes vacant. Remus and James are huddled together, laughing at some gadget they’re playing with. 
You stand against the wall awkwardly, shifting on your feet awkwardly in hope Sirius would snap out of his daydreaming to notice you. Unfortunately, it’s Remus who notices you. And the smiled call of your name is what snaps Sirius out of his trance, bloodshot eyes snapping to yours almost instantly. 
The heartbreak in his eyes is a mirror of your own. You attempt a smile but it wobbles almost instantly. “Can I talk to you?” You’re not even sure you said it out loud but Sirius nods anyway, getting up from his spot on the couch and walking towards you, slowly as if you were ready to run at any moment. 
You feel like you could run at any moment.
With shaking hands, you gently grip his wrist. He lets out a sigh at the small touch of contact, eyes fluttering shut. Gently, you lead him outside of the common room and down the marble steps. 
It’s silent as you keep walking, down, down, down, until you’re at the Black Lake. Not once do you let go of your grip around his wrist. Not once does he comment on it, lest you remove your hand that provides the air he lives on. 
For the first time in a week he feels like he can finally breathe again. He’s scared of what you want to say, and he hates for this to be the last time he can touch you again. Impending dread twists his stomach but he selfishly allows himself to hope. 
“I want you to explain why you did it,” You start, stopping under a snow covered tree. Unlike Sirius, you’re dressed for the cold weather, wearing multiple layers of warm clothing and fluffy gloves. Sirius, on the other hand, is freezing his ass off, with only one layer of clothing and no gloves. But he doesn’t mind as long as it means more time with you. 
He’s been given the opportunity to explain himself and he’s not going to fuck this up. Shaking his head, he starts from the start. “When I first saw James and Regulus together I felt so angry. Regulus and I never had a good relationship, I like to blame it on my parents for pitting us against each other but I know it’s also my fault. I should have tried harder to have a relationship with him.”
It’s hard to stare with you looking at him like that but he’s trying his best. 
“I guess I got…Jealous? I’ve always wanted a good relationship with him- I mean he’s my brother, you know?” he lets out a dry laugh, void of any humor. “And then James didn’t tell me anything, I don’t expect him to but it hurt. I’ve been talking to someone Euphemia suggested and I think I was scared that he was going to leave. Regulus has always been my parents' favorite, and I got scared that James would see how much better he was and would leave me.”
 “Either way, I should have never involved you. And used you like that. You never deserved that and I’m so sorry.”
You’re quiet, staring at the frozen lake. Slowly, you wipe your mouth with your hands, turning to look at him. You manage a small smile before you’re walking towards him hesitantly, taking his hands that look ready to turn blue at any moment into yours. 
“Your hands are cold.” You place a gentle kiss on his knuckles and Sirius would have fallen to his knees in front of you if it wouldn’t have lost contact with your body, warm and inviting. Your lips tickle his fingers as you continue to speak. “A part of me is still a little angry. But I can’t stay away from you. Merlin, one week away from you and all I could think about were your kisses, and how kind you are.”
“So you’ll take me back?”
“Of course, my love.”
Then you’re kissing him, warming his cold lips and melting him from the inside out. You’re gentle, cradling his hands between yours and being so so loving. He feels like he could cry. He’s never felt this loved before, not by his parents, not by his friends, heck, not by his brother. 
“I love you,” It's the first time he’s ever whispered those words, but it feels right. Everything about you and him feels right. 
“I love you too.”
182 notes · View notes
mcflymemes · 2 years ago
Text
PROMPTS FOR ANGSTY CONVERSATIONS *  a collection of things you never want to hear
you never told me that. i can't believe you never told me.
what difference does it make?
no, no, no, don't leave me! please!
i failed you. is that what you want me to say?
was it all a lie? all this time?
so... when do you leave? what time? so i can be ready.
why did it take you so long to tell me? how long have you been holding this in?
i was wrong.
is this it? is this all there is?
at least give me one last dance.
all the exits are blocked. we're trapped.
there's too much blood.
you're the worst person i've ever met.
you're just as broken as i am.
i really thought we could work things out.
so stupid of me to think you actually cared.
you're just going to carry on and pretend like everything's fine when it's not fine.
go on without me. i can handle this.
don't tell me i'm too late.
i told you to leave me alone.
there's no use in trying anymore. it's over.
i should have known. i should have known all along.
i need you to be honest with me. tell me the truth. i deserve the truth.
you failed me.
i wish i never met you.
it's over. go home.
i feel something broken inside me. you can't fix it. no one can.
just take some deep breaths. in and out. you're gonna be fine.
you used to be better than this.
there's no way out.
what the hell was that for?
if you stay here, you'll die. do you understand?
how dare you speak to me like that!
am i too late?
you have to believe me. i didn't mean for this to happen.
i used to think you were perfect. i guess i was wrong.
so this is how it ends? just like that?
we're running out of time.
when were you going to tell me the truth?
how long has it been since we spoke? feels like years.
when did this start? how long has this been going on?
you never really loved me. it was all fake.
who was that? why were they here? why did you let them in?
i came as fast as i could.
what the hell did you think would happen?
can i even trust you?
i don't know who i am anymore.
i can't lose you again.
you are my biggest regret.
what good will it do?
just keep pressure on the wound, okay?
how could you do this to me?
i said get out! get out of here!
i'm never speaking to you again.
i tried to stop it!
you're so fucking stupid.
it's never been okay.
good riddance.
get out of here! i'll handle this!
i can't believe you. i can't believe you did this to me.
you were a good person once. i looked up to you.
i never should have listened to you. i'm such a fool.
don't lie to me! i know when you're lying!
why the hell did you do that?
i've never been wanted. not really. not by anyone.
i never loved you.
i've been dealing with this my whole life.
it was all a lie.
you forgot my birthday.
i'm a monster.
you actually believed that shit?
you think i would just stick around and let you treat me like that?
are you actually leaving?
can i kiss you one last time?
i can't believe i gave up my life for you. i gave up everything for you.
i can't lose you, too!
for what it's worth, there's no one i would rather fight alongside.
hang on for me, all right? don't leave me. please don't go.
i deserve better than this. i deserve better than you.
good! get out of here! i didn't want you here anyway!
i made it up as i went along.
things are going to get worse before they get better.
i don't think we're getting out of this alive.
we're not gonna make it.
get the fuck out of my face.
i don't think i'm meant to be loved.
2K notes · View notes
lee-laurent · 5 months ago
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Playing Pretend - Jamie Drysdale
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Summary: In which Jamie and his girlfriend end things after pretending everything was okay. Or in which Jamie's girlfriend moves in with Trevor while attempting to keep her pregnancy hidden from everyone.
content: pregnancy, mentions of abortion, long distance, keeping secrets from partner (if that's a warning idk), angst, fluff, mentions of sex, implications of cheating/being unfaithful, jamie's trade :(
notes: this one is a bit more angsty than my other fics. i wanted to experiment with trying something new. possible happy ending tho. guess you'll have to read to find out ;) sorry if it seems rushed, i didn't know how to format it :/
"Of course, you have options. You can read more about those here. This is a judgement free zone," the nurse continued to drone on about scheduling another appointment, but Violet had tuned her out. In fact, the only thing that Violet could hear was her heart pounding in her chest.
"Thank you," she mumbled, grabbing the paperwork and shoving it into her purse. All she wanted was Jamie and he was on the other side of the country.
Once she was safely in her car in the parking lot, she let the tears fall. A baby? How was she supposed to take care of a baby when her boyfriend lived five hours away by plane. They barely spoke more than twice a week at this point. Their relationship was falling apart and a baby wasn't going to save it.
"How was the doctor?" Trevor asked as she walked through the door, kicking off her shoes.
"Fine. Just food poisoning, like you thought."
"I told you! Never eat grocery store sushi, Vi. Should've listened to me."
"Ha. I guess you know best, Trev. I'm gonna go lie down. I'm still nauseous."
"Make sure you text Jamie! He was worried about you."
"I'm sure he was," she mumbled, making her way to her bedroom. She looked at the picture on her bedside table. It was of her and Jamie at his first game with the Ducks. She'd been so proud to see him move from the Gulls to the NHL. He had his arm wrapped around her waist and was looking down at her like she'd hung the moon and stars in the sky, while she smiled happily into the camera. Violet sighed, putting the photo face down. She couldn't bare to look at Jamie's face right now, photo or not.
Her phone buzzed.
Jamie <3: Trev texted. Said it's food poisoning like he thought. Feel better. I love you
Vi: Thanks, Jam. Love you too
Lying to Jamie made her stomach churn. In fact, everything was making her stomach churn at the moment. Trevor had made sausages with his breakfast that morning, leading to her projectile vomiting in the kitchen. Which is when Trevor finally convinced her to go to a walk-in clinic. A walk-in clinic that sent her to Planned Parenthood. And now at the thought of Jamie not knowing about his child mixed with the baby in her womb hating the smell of everything, she was leaned over the toilet once more.
"Vi? Do you want some ginger ale?" Trevor asked from the doorway.
"No. I'm okay, Trev. Just, I- I'd like to be alone right now."
"Oh, right. Call me if you need anything," he sighed, gently shutting the door behind him.
Violet sniffled, reaching for her phone on the counter next to her.
Jamie was worried sick about Violet, but he was also focused on the game of NHL 24 he was playing with Cam.
"Wait. Time out. Violet's texting."
"Oh, shit. What'd she say?"
"That... that we need to talk?" Jamie furrowed his eyebrows.
"Shit. We can finish this later. Call her."
"Thanks, Cam. I- I'll be back," Jamie stood up from the couch, albeit a bit wobbly from nerves, speeding off to his room.
"Hey," Violet's voice cracked as it broke through the speaker of his phone.
"Hey, um, what did you wanna talk about?"
"Long distance isn't working, Jamie. I- I think we should end things."
"What? Vi? Where is this coming from? Did- did you meet someone in Anaheim?"
"What? God, no. Jamie- I wouldn't cheat. You know that. I just- this is too much stress for me right now."
"Our relationship is too much stress for you? I- I told you that you could move here. We could get our own place. I-"
"Jamie, I have a life here. I have a job. My friends."
"I had all of that too. But, I- I'm making it work here. You could make it work here, Violet! Please don't do this. You- you're the love of my life."
"Jamie, don't make this harder than it needs to be. I can't do this anymore."
"Please, Violet. Please."
"We- if you need anything call Trevor. Goodbye, Jamie."
Jamie didn't return to his game with Cam; he spent the rest of the night crying himself to sleep on his bed.
"You broke up with Jamie?!" Trevor shouted the next morning, waking up an exhausted Violet.
"Trevor? It's 6 in the morning."
"Yeah? Well Jamie just called me in tears, saying that you dumped him OVER THE PHONE?!"
"We're long distance. How else was I supposed to do it?"
"You weren't supposed to do it at all, Violet! You guys are made for each other! What's with this sudden change of heart?"
"We were barely talking anymore. I need a present boyfriend."
"Vi-"
"Drop it, Trevor! It's frankly none of your business!"
"None of my bus-"
Violet gagged, leaning over and puking on the hardwood floor. She looked up at Trevor, wiping her mouth.
"Get me a paper towel, please."
"Right. Um, right... This conversation isn't over."
He returned with a roll of paper towels. Watching as she pulled herself out of bed, to clean up the mess next to her bed.
"Why'd you break up with him?"
"I just told you. It wasn't working."
"But, you didn't even try to make it work. He said you didn't communicate it wasn't going well until yesterday."
"Wow. Does Jamie tell you every intimate part of our relationship?" she snapped.
"No."
"It was rhetorical, Trevor."
"Oh. He loves you."
"I know."
"Do you not love him?"
"What? Of course I love him. He's the fa- the first man I loved. I'll always love him."
"Then why break up with him?! He- he said you could go live with him in Philly."
"I don't want to leave Anaheim. I want to r- never mind. But, my job is here."
"Get a new one."
"God! You're so immature! It's not that fucking easy, Trevor! I'm not going to start my entire life over for Jamie! So fucking drop it!"
"I-"
"Drop it!"
Trevor dropped it. At least with Violet he did. He spent every day trying to convince Jamie to call her. To fix things. To figure what he could do. Jamie wasn't easily convinced though. After the mental anguish that the phone call with his now ex-girlfriend had caused him, he wasn't sure he wanted to go through it again.
Violet's morning sickness hadn't ended. In fact, it was getting worse. Morning sickness? More like all day and all night sickness. She was in agony. And Trevor as oblivious as he was, was getting suspicious.
"Maybe you should go to the doctor again? I don't think food poisoning is supposed to last this long."
"It's probably just stress."
"Why're you stressed?"
"Work."
"But- okay? I still think you should go back."
"Trevor."
"Yes?"
"I'm fine."
"You're pretending."
"What?"
"You're pretending everything is okay. You're just afraid to admit that things are worse without Jamie. Not better. You're more stressed. Hence the vomiting."
"Trevor, I- I have work to do."
Two hours later Violet was in the kitchen doing dishes when her phone started ringing.
"Trev! Can you get that?"
"Sure."
"Hi! This is Alice from Anaheim OB/GYN, I was just calling to confirm your appointment on Friday with Dr. Rhodes," the voice came through the phone.
"Trev! Who is it?"
"Sure, just let me get the phone to Violet. Oh, perfect! Thank you!"
"Hi?" Violet asked, pressing the phone to her ear.
"Hi! Is this Violet?"
"Yes, this is she."
"Perfect! Just a few questions to go over before confirming your appointment."
"Oh, of course."
"Any abnormal bleeding?"
"No."
"Dizziness?"
"Nope."
"How's the nausea you mentioned last time you were in?"
"About the same."
"Okay, I'll let the nurse know. We can get you some tablets for that. See you Friday at 11:30."
"Perfect, thank you."
Violet sighed, hanging up the phone.
"You're pregnant?" Trevor whispered.
"What? No."
"She said she was calling from the OB/GYN's office. Isn't that a doctor for pregnant people?"
"Not always. They also give birth control and stuff."
"But why would you need birth control if you're not seeing Jamie anymore?"
"For my periods."
"You're lying."
"I'm not lying, Trevor. Why would I lie?"
"You're lying. You always itch your wrist when you lie. You're pregnant. Does Jamie know?"
"Maybe it isn't Jamie's?"
"Yeah? Who else have you slept with? Nobody. You and Jamie had sex the night before we left for Nashville."
"Who told you that?"
"Jamie."
"Ew. I-"
"So it is Jamie's?"
"I'm not pregnant."
"Violet... is this why you dumped him? Are you getting... you know?"
"Not pregnant, Trevor."
"Fine, I'll drop it for now. But, if you were pregnant, I, um, I'd be here to help. I promise."
"Good to know if I am to hypothetically get pregnant," she mumbled, itching her wrist. Trevor let out a heavy sigh.
"You- you can tell me anything, Violet. I'm not going to tell Jamie if you don't want me to."
"You said you were gonna drop it. Plus there's nothing to tell him. Everything is normal."
"Right, um, I'm going out. Call if you need anything for your... food poisoning."
"Will do."
When she finally heard the front door shut, she let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding. The tension in the kitchen had been palpable. She knew deep down that Trevor didn't believe her, but until she was showing she'd be able to hide it... maybe.
A month had passed and Violet was shocked to find that it looked like she was bloated. Violet had always been on the thinner side, but not to the point that she thought she'd be showing this early into her pregnancy. The doctors had confirmed that she was just over a month when she found out, meaning she was nearing three months. Baggy clothes became her new best friends. Unfortunately, most of the baggy clothing she owned were items she'd stolen from Jamie. This led to lots of looks from Trevor as she moved around their apartment.
Trevor now knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that Violet was pregnant. He'd gone into her bathroom to find some extra toilet paper and come across an array of prenatal vitamins. He didn't bring it up though. The apartment constantly had an air of awkwardness shrouding it. Violet and Trevor were tip-toeing around each other. And he knew that eventually he would have to be the bigger person and bring it up, which was uncommon for the Ducks player.
"I was talking to Jamie today," Trevor mentioned as he twirled some spaghetti onto his fork.
"Hm. How's Jamie?"
"Better. He, uh, he still asks about you."
"Good for him."
"I'm sure if you told him... about your situation, he'd be willing to help."
"What situation?" Violet smiled, taking a sip of her water.
"Can we stop pretending, Violet?"
She shook her head, pushing away from the small kitchen table.
"God! Grow up, Violet! You're going to be a mom! Start acting like a fucking adult!" Trevor shouted as she retreated to her room, that Trevor had not-so-lovingly nicknamed "the cave." Her door slammed in response, shaking the pictures hanging in the corridor.
"Hey, girl!" her best friend, Aly, smiled through the FaceTime call. "How're those vitamins? One of the moms I work with says they're the best ones!"
"Good, I think. I've got a little bump now."
"Damn! Baby Drysdale is growingggg!" she dragged out.
"Don't call them that. He- I still haven't told him."
"Girl! You told me you were going to like a week ago! What changed?"
"He- I saw him on Instagram and he looked so happy. I don't want to ruin that."
"So... you're just gonna wallow in self-pity until your baby is born? What about when he sees you with a baby? Isn't he gonna be suspicious?"
"He already accused me of cheating. So..."
"Violet! No! We are not claiming you cheated and got pregnant from another man."
"Jamie's not ready to be a dad."
"Who told you that? Jamie?"
"No."
"Exactly. You don't know that!"
"I'll think about it, Aly. Right now, the doctor said I need to avoid too much stress. It makes my nausea worse."
"Uh huh. Lemme tell you about this date I went on!"
"Do you think Violet would be okay if I came to visit?" Jamie asked Trevor.
"Um... I mean you're coming to see me. It has nothing to do with her."
"I guess, you're right. I'll get a hotel though. I don't want to intrude on her space."
"Her space is also my space, Jamie."
"Yeah, but she's my... ex. It'd feel weird. Is she, um, seeing anyone new?"
"Violet?" Trevor choked on his water, "No. No. She's been busy with... work."
"Makes sense."
"What about you? Any new women in your life?"
"No. I just compare them all to Vi."
"When you come, maybe you can get some closure. Talk to her."
"If she lets me."
"If she lets you," Trevor smiled, continuing to help his best friend plan his trip.
Six months pregnant. Violet couldn't believe it. Her baby was the size of corn, according to Aly. It was hard to hide her ever growing bump, but Trevor's hoodies and some of Jamie's old clothes did the trick. She had no idea that Jamie was coming to visit. It was all part of Trevor's plan to get her to talk to him... and admit her pregnancy.
Trevor was buzzing as he walked Jamie up the stairs to their apartment.
"Violet did some redecorating, but it looks similar to when you left! She's still asleep, I think. She sleeps in on weekends."
"Not surprising," Jamie bit back his smile.
"Welcome back, bud!" Trevor swung open the door, leading his ex-teammate into his home. Jamie looked around, it was similar to when he left. A few pictures had been taken down and replaced with new ones, but it looked pretty much the same.
"Trev? Why are you shouting?" Violet questioned sleepily, rubbing a hand on her stomach. The baby had recently discovered how to kick and it was their new favourite hobby.
"Look who I brought home with me!" Trevor beamed.
"Jamie?" the girl suddenly looked much more awake, dropping her hands to her side.
"You... you're pregnant," was all Jamie could manage, staring directly at her stomach.
"Surprise?"
The group sat in the living room. Well, Trevor and Violet were sitting. Jamie was pacing around the room, running his hands through his hair.
"You're gonna go bald, Jimmy. Stop."
"She- you're pregnant?!"
"Yes. We established that, Jamie," Violet rolled her eyes.
"Yeah. Is it... is it mine?"
"Um..."
"Yes, the baby is yours, Jamie! Are you dumb?" Trevor furrowed his brow.
"You didn't tell me?! Neither of you?!"
"She... It wasn't my place."
"Yeah? What about you, Violet? What's your excuse?!"
"I- I didn't want to ruin your career."
"Ruin my career? No! You were just being selfish. Don't pretend this had anything to do with protecting me!" Jamie exclaimed.
"Jamie, can you sit down? You're stressing me out," she sighed, rubbing over where the baby was kicking repeatedly, sensing its mother's turmoil.
"Violet! We... we're having a baby."
"I'm having a baby."
God, she was just as stubborn as before.
"Z, can we have a minute?"
"Oh, sure," Trevor left and Jamie didn't speak until he heard the door close.
"Violet, this is serious. Why would you keep this from me? Is this why you ended things?" he asked, kneeling in front of her.
"Sort of. I panicked. I just, I don't want you to feel forced to stay because of us," she motioned to her belly.
"I... I still love you. A lot. God, I never stopped loving you."
"Jamie..."
"You... you can come live in Philly! We can fix us. And raise our baby. Be a happy family."
"I want to stay here."
"You... you can't keep my baby from me, Violet. Please," his eyes started to water, "Not any longer than you already have."
"He-"
"He? It's a boy?"
"Shit. Yeah."
"I'm going to have a son?" he smiled, the tears finally falling. Violet could feel her hormones acting up, her eyes also welling with tears.
"Henry."
"Hm?"
"I- I've been planning on naming him Henry."
"Henry. It's perfect, Vi. Can I?" he gestured to the swell of her stomach. She nodded, letting out a sob as his hands met the cotton of her shirt.
"Hi, Henry. It's your dad. I'm sorry I haven't been here. I- I don't blame Mommy. She did what she thought was best."
Violet continued to sob. Why was he being so sweet to her? She'd kept his son from him!
"Violet, can you just think about it? Please. Us and Henry in Philly."
"I can think about it, Jams," she cried, pulling him into a tight hug.
"Are you sure you built that right?" Violet asked for the fourth time, "I don't want him falling on the ground in the middle of the night."
"I followed the instructions, Vi. It's secure. He'll be fine."
"Are you sure? I just-"
Jamie cut her off with a kiss to her lips.
"I'm positive, love. Now stop worrying. Poor Henry is going to pop out early if you keep that up."
"I'd appreciate it if he did. He's been sitting on my bladder all day."
Jamie kneeled down in front of her, placing a hand where he saw the imprint of a foot kick.
"Can you move off Mommy's bladder? It makes her pissy. And Daddy doesn't want to deal with it right now."
"He's not listening. I need to pee," she waddled out of the nursery and into the ensuite. Jamie laughed, following her into their bedroom.
"You look good pregnant," Jamie commented as she emerged from the bathroom.
"Shut up. We're not having sex until this monster is out of me."
"He's not a monster!"
"He's giant! I can't breathe."
"Here," Jamie walked behind her, lifting up her stomach. She let out a long sigh of relief, the pressure being alleviated from her back.
"Thanks, Jams. I love you."
"I love you too," he smiled. Although they weren't the most stable couple on the planet, Jamie was just glad to have his girl back. And now he had his little boy too. He felt complete. And so did Violet. Complete and happy with their soon-to-be family of three.
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mysteryshoptls · 6 months ago
Text
SR Ruggie Bucchi - Tsumsitter Voice Line
Tsumsitter Ruggie has no vignette
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Summon Line: They're sayin' this tsum's just like me, but don't listen to that. Unlike me, this little thing'll absolutely rip you off!
Groooovy!!: Geez, why's this tsum so hung up on madol? Who could it've gotten that obsession from…?
Home: Hey, tsum, what're you writ... A resume?
Home Idle 1: Those job postings the tsum is lookin' through all look like primo positions! Maaan, if I didn't have school, I'd totally apply!
Home Idle 2: Suuuper glad these tsums don't eat nothin'. If I had to pay for its food expenses on toppa everything else, I'd've rioted!
Home Idle 3: D'ya think that Idia-san's tsum is also good at buildin' contraptions or whatever? It'd be great if it could make somethin' so I could sell it an make a ton of moolah... Juuust kiddin'.
Home Idle - Login: Maaan, takin' care of a tsum's a drag… Guess I'll just pretend it's one of 'em lil' brats from back home followin' me 'round.
Home Idle - Groovy: Fine, I get it already! Here ya go, tsum, your half of the pay. Geez, cheeky lil' thing…
Home Tap 1: I can't really tell what the tsum is thinkin', but somehow I can kinda figure out what it's tryin' to say. I wonder why?
Home Tap 2: I was offerin' to look after Ace-kun's tsum, but he turned me down flat. Maybe I was pushin' a little too hard.
Home Tap 3: Apparently, Trey-san's tsum knows how to make cakes. I wanna cake baked by a tsum! I'll eat the whole thing myself, too!
Home Tap 4: The tsum is completely covered in chocolate!? Is there a chocolate fountain somewhere!? I wanna go so you better tell me where it is!!
Home Tap 5: If you got a present or somethin' for my tsum, I can take 'em off your hands. Don't woooorry. I'll totally make sure it gets it.
Home Tap - Groovy: Don'tcha feel like givin' me and my tsum some odd jobs to do? Our fee varies based on the type of ask, though… But hey, I can give you a friend's discount!
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Requested by @ghostydancer.
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