#But I think a lot about everything and so I put an unnecessary amount of thought into this shit that I can’t reasonably add to the comic

[ciderjacks]

Wip

[loki-cees-all]

Hello and hi, my lovely!

I have this scenario for you that I sometimes think about.

How would Loki react if you (the mortal he might have feelings for but he’s not quite certain yet) were the only one to acknowledge his birthday? Maybe you put up a few balloons and even buy him a little cupcake with a candle on it? How would he react?

Happiest of birthdays to you! You’re a joy to know!! I love you!! 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Cupcake For a God {Avengers!Loki x Avengers!Reader}

Cee's Loki Fic Masterlist / AO3 Link

Pairing : Avengers!Loki x Avengers!Reader

Summary : Loki’s birthday is approaching, and it forces himself to reconcile who he wants to be versus who he actually is, and to reflect on his almost certainly unrequited feelings for you.

But what if the feelings weren’t unrequited?

W/c : 1.9k words

Content/Warnings : Angst, a bit of fluff

Author's Note : I swear I tried so hard to make this not so angsty! Please forgive me, Saz! 😭😭😭

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There were a lot of things for Loki to dislike about living on Midgard. 

For starters, he was being forced to live there, inside Stark Tower with the other Avengers as penance for his crimes. It was only fitting, they’d told him, that he should assist in their efforts to keep the mortals safe because he was the reason they needed protecting in the first place.

Loki didn’t bother telling them what Thanos had done to him after he fell from the Bifrost; truthfully, he still didn’t quite understand it himself. That entire year was a blur to him - a painful concoction of lies and manipulations and tears and blood that left him unable to tell the difference between fact and fiction, even almost two years after the torture had began. 

He didn’t want anyone to know how weak he was, about how much he’d lost himself. If they knew how vulnerable he was, they might decide he wasn’t worth the trouble and send him to the dungeons of Asgard instead. 

Another thing he disliked was the forced pleasantries and unnecessary rituals humans had developed with each other, and by extension, him. The humans would smile as they past him by on the street, but it was a falsity every time; the sentiment never reached their eyes, and Loki could smell their fear from several blocks away. 

Loki knew they didn’t actually care how his day was going, that their concern only went as far as making sure he wasn’t on the verge of invading with another alien force under his command. He wasn’t, but honestly, if it meant everyone kept their distance, then he wasn’t going to argue with it. 

It wasn’t fair to say that Loki preferred being alone, but he was certainly used to it, and that was in direct contradiction of the forced socialization he had to endure on Midgard - press conferences, team building exercises (which Loki believed was just an excuse to consume copious amounts of food and drink), training sessions, something called “movie nights”, and missions across the world to dismantle S.H.I.E.L.D.’s various bunkers and bases. 

It was so much talking, and even more listening. So much lying and pretending that everything was fine, that Loki didn’t feel like a caged monster, and that everyone else wasn’t waiting for the littlest thing to completely set him off. 

But Loki was trying as hard as he could to ignore the dull ache that haunted his dreams and every waking moment. He knew he had hurt people, he knew he needed to make up for his grievous transgressions, but he didn’t know how else to make up for it all. So he pressed on, through the discomfort and awkwardness, in the hope that one day everything might become a little easier.

The one bright side to all of this, the one shimmering ray of light amidst the sea of gray, was you. Loki didn’t quite know what to make of his attraction to you - was it real, or was it just your absence of fear in his presence? Had it just been too long since he’d felt the touch of another, or were you actually everything he’d ever wanted?

Loki almost didn’t want to find out, in case it wasn’t real. Because your smile reached your eyes every time you looked at him, and your laughter was like sparks blowing across the embers of a dying fire…but he couldn’t shake the fear that it could just be another trick. 

Perhaps his mind still hadn’t fully recovered from Thanos’ torture. Maybe Thor had put you up to this, as a way of making assimilation easier for him. 

Because why else would you look at him like that? Why would you go out of your way to sit next to him during the team’s movie nights? Why else would you lean towards him on the couch and fall asleep against the shoulder of a villain, of a monster, of a fool? 

It was stupid, and pointless, and illogical, and just like him to irrationally want something he couldn’t ever have. He was a God, and you were a mortal, and it would ultimately end in heartache either way. So while he had the chance, Loki forced himself to remain content and to just linger in the question of what if you could want him too. 

The final thing about Midgard, and the one he despised the most, was the mortal obsession with birthdays. Loki was grateful the Asgardians never paid any attention to such silly and exhausting traditions - which was surprising, considering how much Asgardians loved frivolity. 

So he really shouldn’t have been shocked when Thor discovered, and subsequently fell in love with, the concept of birthdays. His brother immediately requested his mortal companion Jane to perform the necessary calculations to determine the Midgardian equivalent of Thor’s birthdate - and Loki’s as well, which his brother gleefully announced to the entire team and embarrassed him to the deepest pits of his soul. 

A massive celebration was planned for Thor, with enough food and drink to sustain a small country, and on the special night, flashing lights and loud music bathed the massive common room of Stark Tower in merriment and laughter. Everyone was invited, and it would have been rude for Loki to not make an appearance - but it wasn’t because he wanted to admire you in your party dress, although that was a very lovely bonus. 

But as gorgeous as you looked - the longer the party went on, the sadder Loki became. Everyone was talking, smiling, and dancing, congratulating Thor on his many accomplishments and swapping happy stories of all the good times they’d had together. It was painful to witness, to know for a fact that no such party would be happening for himself when his birthday rolled around. 

Loki tried telling himself that he didn’t want it, and that he’d be miserable during it. He tried convincing himself that it would be too loud, and too bawdy, and vain, and that he didn’t need other people’s reassurances that they were happy he was there with them. He told himself he didn’t need it at all, that he was completely fine without it. But it was a lie, so of course it didn’t work. 

As the days approached to Loki’s birthday, he became even more withdrawn than usual. With the exceptions of necessary missions or training, he stopped leaving his room. He was silent during travel on the Quinjet, and refused your invitations to further movie nights, even though the disappointment on your face ripped him apart in ways he’d never experienced before. 

He felt like he deserved to suffer, to collapse in on himself like a dying star because he knew he’d never be worthy of the love and attention his older brother seemed to collect so effortlessly. It wasn’t Thor’s fault; it was just Loki’s lot in life. And the further he receded, the more likely his heartache would be justified, and he couldn’t be surprised if he was already disappointed.

The evening of his birthday was the worst night he’d experienced in a long time, not since the day he let go of the Bifrost. Loki didn’t even come out of his room for dinner that night, choosing instead to feast on pain, and anguish, and regret, and all the feelings he hadn’t ever had the time to process over his thousand years of existence. 

Thor tried several times to lure him out of his room, to no avail. Loki wouldn’t leave - no, he couldn’t leave. He couldn’t bring himself to witness the fact that they’d done nothing special for him, even though he’d be furiously uncomfortable if they did. 

As the hours passed, he tried to distract himself with sleep, and then reading, but neither did the trick. Eventually, he curled up on the window seat of his private quarters, wrapped himself in furs and pressed his forehead against the glass, watching the tiny little mortals going about their nights in blissful ignorance of the god suffering fifty floors above them. 

And Loki was so lost that he could barely respond to the cautious knock on his door, the one that threatened to pull him away from his misery. But his heart leapt in his throat when he heard your voice calling his name, and he wanted so much to let you in, to feel you next to him. 

But the urge to say something cruel, to push you away and continue on alone, was just as strong. Loki didn’t know which to concede to, even as his feet slowly carried him to the door. He didn’t know what he was going to say, even while his fingers raked through his messy curls and rubbed the pain from his eyes. 

He felt ridiculous as he hesitated to open the door; he was a God, and once the most fearsome villain this entire planet had ever seen - but here he was, nervous and split open and too raw to simply open a door and look upon a beautiful woman while he was hiding away from his birthday. 

There was a soft rustling sound on the other side of the door, and Loki’s forehead rested against the wood as he heard your footsteps quietly retreating down the hallway. He’d waited too long, paralyzed by his self-indulgent indecision, and it had pushed you away. 

He thought about yanking the door open and calling after you. He considered begging for you to come back. He desperately wanted to wrap his arms around you and to pull you closer, but all he could manage was to gently pull the door open after he was sure you were gone. 

On the floor of the hallway, waiting patiently and comfortably for him, was a beautifully-decorated cupcake and a note resting on a small paper plate. A single candle rose out of the emerald and sapphire swirls of frosting, and the pink paper was folded in half, with his name written in the loveliest cursive on the outside. 

Loki fought back tears as he retrieved the gift from the floor, and he cautiously balanced the plate in one hand while holding the note in the other. 

Hey Loki,

I know birthdays are hard; they’re hard for me too. But hopefully this treat makes you smile, even just for a second. 

I’ll be awake for a little while longer - stop by my room if you need to talk. I promise I won’t find it weird :) 

XOXO

P.S. I’m really glad you’re here, even if you’re not ready to accept that yet. 

He swallowed hard as he stared at the most generous gift he’d ever received. He didn’t know if you even fully understood what you’d just done for him. He fervently wanted to go after you, and he desperately wanted to continue hiding. 

But you’d extended an invitation, one he could feasibly take you up on. No one would argue it wasn’t in his right to do so. And Gods above, he wanted to, more than anything else he’d ever wanted. But would it be worth it, or would it just make everything worse? 

Loki tore his damp and heavy eyes away from the note and glanced up and down the hallway. He shut his door, just as quietly as he’d opened it, wondering if it would be a mistake to allow his heart guide him to where he’d rather be. 

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Click here to be added to my Loki fic tag list! 💚

[ryulvrs]

Idk how to request os it doesn't sound rude😭 (i'm sorry) but can you do miyeon g!p x fem!reader (like jealous miyeon bc reader was flirting with yuqi and talking dirty with minnie, then miyeon heard and just putted her in her place iygwim) if you don't wanna do this just ignore it please

just mine (miyeon, smut)

summary: miyeon takes your flirtatious jokes with her friends seriously and puts you in your place

warnings: dom!gp!miyeon, sub!f!reader, praise, breeding kink, jealousy, degradation, mirror sex, slight choking kink, a lot of dirty talk

word count: 1.3k

a/n: not much to say, just a lot of filthy miyeon 😭

“you did well today,” your lips temptingly released, with the lipgloss sticking them together.

“hm? with the stage?” yuqi turned her head at you, and almost instantaneously her air felt heated and her breath hitched. you nod, awaiting her response.

“thank you, y/n,” she smirked with just the corners of her lips.

“no need,” you conciously moved your hand to rest on her shoulder for just enough time that she’d think about it. long enough that she’d think about you.

“is miyeon still here?” she asks you, and you both can guess why.

“shes in the next room, are you going home soon?” this is true, miyeon is in the next room. actually, in the next room with the door open giving her a loud and clear audio of everything happening.

“who knows, you could come,” she smirks but laughs it off. as you open your mouth to respond, your head follows minnie who just came out of another connecting entrance.

“hi y/n,” she says, smiling all cutesy.

“hii minnie,” your voice does that thing where it lingers for an unnecessary amount of time. you look her up and down, noticing her obvious pulchritude immediately.

she chuckles, noticing your silence. “cat got your tongue?” she teases. your initial instinct is to make some corny joke about her tongue but you resist in attempt to look cool.

its obvious to everyone in the room that theres some sort of tension, even if its awkward and slightly cliche at times.

“you both look too good, if miyeon wasn’t a room over who knows what i’d be doing right now,” you remark with a devilish smile plastered on your face. you earn a laugh out of them both, but you can tell they undoubtedly agree.

“probably us,” yuqi says under her breath, but you catch it and just giggle. the laughs wouldn’t last much longer although, because the feeling of an unrecognized hand inching onto your waist shuts you up quickly.

your body jinks, to be met by your girlfriend’s uptight stature. “hey miyeon! ready to-“ she cuts you off my taking your hand and urging you to the car.

no words left her mouth the entire car ride, just silence between the both of you. you know what you did though, you were fully aware she would hear all of it too. even better, you loved how jealous she got.

it felt as if your arm was going to fall off when she forcefully dragged you into your shared apartment. she locked eyes with you, with her aggressive yet charming demeanor taking over her completely.

“anything to say?” she spits. there is nothing to say, you just flirted with her friends and did it to make her jealous, because shes beyond hot like this. so, you just shake your head.

“do you want to fuck them, y/n?” she outright states. obviously, taken aback, you stutter over yourself at the claim made.

“what- what the fuck miyeon?” you can’t help but slightly shout at her, even if you know theres reason behind her anger. she scoffs and laughs to control the situation. “i wasn’t actually flirting, baby, i thought you could tell that?” you say.

“oh yeah?” she looks down but she was still very upset.

“yes,” you practically beg. she steps a bit closer to you, but her face doesnt change or drop.

“you’re such a slut, y/n,” she looks you up and down, finally focusing her eyes on yours with her head tilted a little. you wince a little, in pain from biting down on your tongue.

she places her hands on the back of your head, rubbing on your hair adding to the tension between you. her lips pressed just on the edges of yours. you lean, falling deeper into the temptation. her tongue sliding just enough out that you would feel it.

“you’re mine, okay?” she pulls away. “im gonna make you feel it.” her kiss travels you both into a utopia even if you could feel her anger traveling through her bites.

her arms moving from your head to your hands, pulling you whilst holding the kiss into your room. the romantic gestures don’t last long however, as she practically throws you onto the bed.

“strip for me,” she hisses. you do as she asks, and reveal your curved body to her. she undos her clothes along with you, and lets only a second pass before pouncing onto you.

“im gonna fuck you better than they ever could” she grunts. she slaps her cock against the folds of your entrance, exposed to her touch and the air.

you feel her hands spread your legs just a bit farther apart, enough for her to pound into you. the tip of it pushes your edges, coating itself in your liquids.

“so wet? aren’t you easy,” she smirks at you pushing into your pussy. with a wicked grin, she leans forward rubbing your bodies together. her free hand flicks at your cunt putting your wetness on the head of her dick.

youre core cries out for her touch, and she thrusts her length in to please you. you grip onto her, almost as if you’re pulling her in from desperation.

“you’re going to take it, princess, ‘kay?” with a firm hand, she moves your face up to look at her, like shes trying to ingrain her words into you. “come on, tell me,” her grasp on your chin drags lower, as she tightens it around your neck.

“i promise, i’ll take it,” you squeeze your eyes shut and your lower body quivers, dragging her in farther. “please,” you whisper, digging your nails farther into her back.

she writes her smirk into her hip movement, and she rams her dick into you. this time, she moves in and out of you at a consistent pace.

every hit on your pussy leads your cum to squirt out. she quickens her pace, noticing this, and dips her finger into your sweet nectar, licking it off.

“what a pretty pussy, im gonna breed you y/n,” she sucks the end of her fingers before slapping them gently on your clit, pushing them in the little space next to her cock.

“take it, suck me in, pretty girl,” her praise causes you to moan loudly, unlike anything miyeon has heard from you before.

this only makes her needier to cum inside of you, so she takes your hips and steadies you, and picks you up to have you facing the mirror beside your bed. your ass towards her, and her cock still pushing into you, as you both look at your body in the mirror.

“see, you are so slutty, look at you,” she pounds into you with her fingertips roaming your legs and hips. “i’ll breed your pussy so you really know you’re mine,” she moans into your ear.

miyeon leans back, making you do all the work of riding her length. the sound of skin clapping against each other, bouncing on her, liquids meshing and moans filling the room.

“my good girl,” she grunts into your ear, stabilizing your body once more.

“n-need your cum,” you moan for her. she smirks and you can feel the increasing heat down your neck.

both of your bodies tense up, and the movements become more erratic. you breathing hitches, and miyeon swallows down groans. the sensation between you two is intense and overwhelming yet a type of pleasure only she could make you feel.

her liquids spill into you, making you truly hers. “mmm so good,” she sighs, pulling out of you gently treating your body as her temple. her lips make their way down your neck and back lovingly, as a way of showing gratitude.

“im yours, miyeon, i promise,” you turn around to her, and lay one more kiss for her, and she returns it with a smile.

“just mine.”

[zahri-melitor]

Bruce’s age:

Look, DC have spent the last 40 years or so making this difficult to pinpoint, given they want to have as much play in his age as possible so he doesn’t feel ‘too old’, but we do have some indications.

1. Leaving for his world trip:

Bruce leaves Gotham somewhere between 14-18 years old. There are some sources that he left at 14 (including the Zero Year timeline, of all places), which leads to the joke that the family are fighting to have characters finish Year 9, but others suggest he finished high school and then left. I like Bruce leaving at 18ish a lot more, simply because it makes concealing the whole situation a lot easier, and it gives Bruce access to his inheritance to FUND the trip.

2. How long was the world trip?

This is one of the places where I believe DC about it being YEARS. Bruce had a lot to study, and studied it with a lot of people, even if you don’t want to pop a hidden degree in the trip at some point. Narrative indications vary from ‘a few years’ out to a decade, particularly for timelines that start his trip at 14.

Zero Year, which is the most recent time DC seriously looked at the component parts of Bruce’s backstory, premises part of the plot on Philip Kane having to navigate whether they were declaring Bruce dead - because he’d been missing for more than 7 years on the trip.

I think the shortest reasonable timeline length we can look at for the trip is 3ish years, given the specifics we know are packed into this, and the fact that in-universe it gets written off as Bruce’s gap years/time at uni before coming back to Gotham as a full adult.

3. How old was Bruce for Year One?

I tend to place him somewhere between 21-25 when he first appears as Batman. He’s an adult, he had full control of Wayne Enterprises (or is in the process of regaining control) to fund what he needs, and just the sheer basics of the timeline demand it (again, timelines that say he was 14 tend to be the same ones that suggest Bruce was gone for close to a decade. That’s WHY they send him at 14, to fit all that training time in).

Where in that early 20s range Bruce is is never quite explicit, but we do also have the additional datapoint that Bruce and Clark tend to be portrayed as within a year of each other in age, and Batman and Superman debut as heroes the same year.

Clark can’t be Superman in Metropolis until he’s finished his journalism degree. He’s got to be 22+ in the modern, post-Crisis timeline (ignoring any time as Superboy if you’re keeping that continuity).

And if you pull in Clark…you have stories like American Alien, where Clark crashes Bruce’s 21st birthday party, which takes place while Bruce is still ‘missing’ and before Ollie ends up on his island. None of the three of them are heroes yet, and they’re all about 21 in that story.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a story indicating Bruce came home any earlier than at 21.

4. How old was Bruce and Dick in Year Three?

Taking everything above into account: Bruce has to be at least 23 years old in Year Three, and could easily be a few years older than that. Dick’s somewhere between 8 and 12 years old.

I don’t particularly like using ‘Dick was 8’ timelines, though I’ve written them before to fit Dick being 8 in with Tim’s necessary timeline to be at the circus and start as Robin at 13. It always just feels somewhat unnecessary, it puts a bunch of extra unused for story years into Bruce and Dick’s time as Batman and Robin that only exist to make Bruce older and there are at least as many retellings and probably more that place Dick at 10+ years old in Year Three. Bruce and Dick’s time as Batman and Robin can already last 8 years using him being aged 10 in Year Three. Pushing their time together out to 10 years puts a fair amount of strain on the timeline for not a lot of benefit in terms of storytelling, as does making Dick’s ‘graduation’ to Nightwing as happening anywhere earlier than late age 17.

The other thing is Damian. We are pretty certain (as post-Crisis ages progress linearly from ALPOD to Flashpoint in the Bats really neatly) that Damian was 10 years old and Dick was 24-25 years old for Batman Reborn. There’s a tendency to preference readings of the timeline that match this to Bruce and Dick’s own age gap, for the parallels it generates, and as seen above, the general assumptions on the timeline already put them into the ballpark of that working.

I don’t insist that Bruce was exactly 24 and Dick was 10 in Year Three, but they both were probably each with a year or so of those ages, given the timeline constraints we have. It could be 23 years and 12 years, it could be 27 years to 9 or 10, but it’s probably going to equalise about that 14 year age gap.

And yes in the current era, that does place Dick as likely being about 28-30 years old and Bruce as in his early 40s. There’s really no point trying to special plead Dick and Bruce’s age gap down to 10 years or less at this point to drop him back into his late 30s rather than in his early 40s; it’s not providing much benefit on the ‘preventing Bruce from getting too old’ front. He’s getting old for maintaining his peak fitness level. We can’t get around that without the sort of surgery done by the n52 timeline, and nobody liked that.

[makedonsgriva]

Devil Venerable Also Wants To Know : A Review

So I generally don't do reviews. But going through the tumblr tag and then on AO3 and seeing the abysmal amount of posts and fanfics, I am writing this review in hopes of someone reading this and then getting convinced by my agenda.

Because Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know deserves to be read by yall.

IT. IS. SO. GOOD.

To summarize, we start with the leader of the demonic Xuanyuan Sect, Wenren E, getting a copy of a trashy romance novel, Abusive Romance.

What baffles him is that he, a logical, rational person who has never felt love in his life, is the second lead and falls in love with the Mary Sue female lead and gives up everything for her and dies in the end for her too.

What makes him even more confused that after he dies in the novel, his loyal subordinate Yin Hanjiang is driven to madness and is hell bent on revenge, pursuing the female lead to kill her.

Wenren E decides that this cannot be allowed. He is not afraid of death, (although he does mind that it was for a stupid reason and not on his own terms) but he very much minds the fact that his subordinate went insane after it. So he sets out to re write destiny.

Now let's talk about the highlights of this book

The Characters

DVAWTK is full of interesting, fun and exciting characters who will remain etched in your memory. Whether it is the sensuous, ruthless and ambitious Shu Yanyan or the wise, perceptive and kind Zhongli Qian, there is a multitude of characters to pick from to love and adore and all of them have deeper and hidden depths that give them layers of complexities.

Not to mention, DVAWTK has several strong and amazing female characters. I have mostly read MXTX books and this is where she lacks the most: hardly any strong female characters. She writes shockingly amazing characters but most of them are male and I mostly don't mind but I do wish I got some great girls to cherish in there too.

Cyan Wings does not disappoint in that aspect. All their female characters are wonderfully well fleshed out. Especially Baili Qingmiao. Seeing her go from the biggest girlfailure to an absolute girlboss over 70 something chapters is satisfying in a sense the way, and I quote the book here, "one feels about their first daughter finally grow up" Chef's kiss truly.

The Plot

The plot is engaging but nothing too crazy, if I am being honest. Apart from a couple of reveals and plot twists that were shocking, it mostly stuck to a more or less predictible story line. That does not mean it was not good; it was. Most of the arcs keep you engaged enough to keep reading without being able to put the story down and tie into each other seamlessly. As such, there are no plot holes and stupid or unnecessary story lines. It works very well to support the characters and their personal growth and arcs.

The Humour

Top notch. So well done. Got me laughing out loud multiple times and earned me a lot of weird looks from my roommate but all worth it. SVSSS was the funniest work I read but DVAWTK gives it a run for its money in terms of the comedy it has and also it's general unhinged-ness, mostly thanks to it's characters. Everyone at the Demonic Xuanyuan Sect is a goofball although they are not trying to be. The skeleton lady Qiu Congxue has no brains. Literally. A ghost ate it so you can guess just how well she is faring in the books.

(she still is immensely powerful tho)

The Romance

So far the biggest freaks I had found while reading Danmei are Mo Ran and Luo Binghe.

Yin Hanjiang is a hundred times worse.

He is an absolute psycho, a complete nutter, powerful beyond comprehension and hopelessly devoted to Wenren E. And Wenren E, once realising his own feelings, thinks it is all so hot!! (makes you really wonder just who is more insane among the two)

My subordinate wants to destroy the entire cultivation world after my death? He has my full support that's so cute of him <3

Freak4freak with some very beautiful and tender moments and an absolute badass power couple who kick ass together in battles. Truly amazing. I love love love wenrenjiang.

The World building

Wonderfully well done and also easy to follow! I especially liked how cultivation was viewed from a different light in this novel and how the book explores the ways it is actually harmful to mortals. I actually learnt a lot about various cultivation stages from this novel and came to understand some common aspects of xianxia novels. DVAWTK uses many technical terms in terms of cultivation and it is fun to read and learn about it

Found Family

Need I say more? Like what's better than a bunch of idiots coming together and growing on their journey thanks to each other? *gently holds Su Huai, Baili Qingmiao, Qiu Congxue and Zhongli Qian in my palms* they are so important to me

Final Thoughts

DVAWTK is a great read with a very satisfying ending. It keeps you hooked till the very end and I am honestly surprised it is so underrated. I am very glad it is getting an official translation soon so hopefully, it will amass more readers although the unofficial translation I read is also very good. It deserves way more hype and fans then it has because it's so silly, so good and so well done. Ugh I hope it also gets some kind of adaptation some day to make it more popular because it deserves it all.

Please read this novel. That's what I want to say. You will not be disappointed.

[tarbuchyloewenthal]

i loved and hated dragon age: the veilguard???

apologies for the extended rant i'm about to go on.

i loved being back in thedas after 10 years, and i loved that final scene with solas. the emotional beats hit just right in that moment.

i loved to absolutely annihilate groups of enemies with arcane bomb popping off every five seconds.

i loved almost all of my companions' arcs. they had so many moments of genuine pathos.

yet all these barely made up for my growing frustration throughout the game at the dialogue and dialogue system, the repetitive quest design, and narrative focus.

this game shares pretty much all the features that i hated when i first played mass effect 3 all those years ago. from the opening of the game skipping everything except the most minimal story set up in favor of bombastic cinematics to the extensive use of auto dialogue taking away the feeling that i had control of my player character.

bioware has apparently gotten into the bad habit of thinking the set up at the beginning of a story is unimportant. i hated starting off with a bang in mass effect 3. i hated it in inquisition. and i hate it now in veilguard. to me it feels like narrative malpractice to forgo the most vital part of the story. only getting a slickly animated cutscene to set the scene in the story instead of any actual attempt to know rook and their relationships with varric, harding, and the world at large really put me off.

the large amounts of auto dialogue only exacerbated my frustration. mass effect 1 (and 2 to a slightly lesser extent) made the dialogue wheel and voiced protagonist feel like an actual evolution of their previous dialogue systems in kotor and jade empire (and origins even though that came out after). i felt like i had actual input. conversations flowed like rpg conversations had always flowed. but in veilguard conversations feel way too passive, only needing my input when the game wanted me to add a small dash of emotional flavor to the conversation or the ever present binary choice for major story moments.

that's not to say bioware didn't write in a lot of reactivity. there's an absurd amount of unique dialogue depending on lineage and faction choices, but i, as the player character, never felt like i was in the drivers seat for any of it.

it made my rook feel completely disconnected from the story they were ostensibly the protagonist of, like they manifested into existence mere seconds before showing up to the bar in minrathous.

and the quests, individually well paced, all mainly followed the same formula of walk down a path, grab loot from side paths, fight some enemies, and listen to your companions talk all the while. part of why i like rpgs is the feeling that i'm inhabiting a world that revolves around more than combat and puzzles for loot. even if that's mostly what video game rpgs boil down to at the end of the day, it's the illusion of that which sells me on the game world. when all your quests involve that same formula, it flattens the game world to nothing but a combat arena. which, to be fair, i felt was a problem all the way back in mass effect 2, as well.

i also didn't like how all the lore reveals flatten nearly all the setting's mysteries down to solas and the evanuris. they were really neat in isolation, but taken together they kind of hollowed out the world.

ok, so i'm tiring even myself out by now, so i'll just mention in passing the relentless and unnecessary expository dialogue, as if the writing team didn't trust the cinematics team to get across literally any information (i'm looking at you bellara on the approach to d'meta's crossing).

this rant gives off the impression that i didn't really enjoy veilguard, but i did. it's just that the things it does well are what you expect from bioware, and the things i find issue with have become a bit of an unfortunate pattern from the studio. the game was so good, but it could have been so much better.

[ellabssucker]

now that i stopped crying... arcane season 2 act II spoilers.

uhm, first off, what. the. fuck.

not even 30 minutes into rhe first episode, BOOM maddie and cait hooking up?? maddie is actually such a sweet, caring girl and i feel so bad for her. she probably spent an unreasonable amount of breath and time trying to change cait's mind when vi was able to in a second. that whole ordeal aside, we are FINALLY (actually it was pretty quick) cait's 'redemption'. or at least she's less blinded by rage now. i mean, she stood in a room with jinx and let her and vi have a family moment with vander instead of trying to blow her brains out. which i think it's progress. i liked cait so much better in this act and THE TENSION WITH VI?!? i just know we are getting sesbian lex on the third act on that one agreement scene.

then seeing jinx actually healthy and relatively sane actually HEALED my heart. i relate to jinx in a way I can't put into words, and she's really important to me, so seeing the positive impact isha had on her was really main focus this act.

which leads to my least favorite part. isha's death. i have a lot to say about it, but i genuinely can't without crying and my head already hurts. she was so important to jinx and I'm scared for how she's gonna deal with isha being gone (which I'm still holding hope for that to not be true). but aside how important isha was for jinx and how she became a part of the family, isha was just a kid. I'm not sure how old she was, and we don't see much of how her lofe was before jinx, but i can confidently say the probably few times in her life she felt safe were around jinx. it hurts to know that little girl probably went through so much, and in such a short time, she was able to build such a strong bond with jinx which lead to her sacrificing herself for her. the look on her face as she tan towards vander almost looked relieved that she could do this for jinx, after jinx did so much to protect her. we saw from early one isha would do anything to protect jinx as well, because she was all the family isha had. the kid deserved better. I really hope she makes a comeback, like we've seen multiple characters in this show do. i really hope she's okay. i won't get over the fact they found a family in each other and i think this is gonna affect jinx greatly. as for how, i think it's gonna be positive. as in, she's gonna use her destructiveness for good rather than bad, cause i genuinely think isha made jinx a better person. i think she brought powder back, but with all the good qualities jinx has.

moving on (lie) to vander, that man just can't catch a break. he deserves better. the writers are inflicting unnecessary pain fr. he finally got his daughters back (plus one) and was on his way to healing and returning to his human self. if only it wasn't for JAYCE.

this bitch ass motherfucker is clearly going through some kind of psychosis but WHAT THE FUCK JAYCE. jayce when i catch you jayce. honestly i don't know what happened to him during that time he was gone on the hex, but i can't get through my head that he would just kill viktor like that, especially knowing what would happen to all the people he healed. but for isha and vander, I really can't sympathize right now. i always found jayce to be self-absorbed and changed his mind every two seconds. he fucked up. he ruined a family. we waited 3 years for this only for this bitch to come and we lost not only viktor, but isha and vander under 10 minutes.

also, where the fuck is ekko?!

i also can't get over the fact that ambessa won't change. even after everything that's happened, she's still manipulating, hurting and killing, risking other people's lives and bribbing people to get her ways and cause even more damage. and talk about 'sacrife'. all she does is sacrifice other people, including her own daughter and son, for her own thirst of blood and selfish reasons. we've been shown time and time again, she is not a good mother, or a good person, or a good leader, and she does not think about anyone but herself.

also stop fucking with mel's head, like messing with her brother? that's fucked up.

i really liked the visual, colors, and music of this act. i think I've never cried harder but also tried to appreciate the cinematography at the same time (which is really hard by the way). i feel like is jinx all over the place, but also still has that touch of the arcane, i feel nostalgic when something reminds me of how the aesthetic was on the first season. it's different for sure, but the feelings are still there. maybe it's just cause it feels like home but i can still see what it used to be on what it is now.

it's a masterpiece. i loved it. it fucking ruined me.

[cha-melodius]

✨️🫘🦄🦖 for the writer game!!! 💖

HELLO LOLAAAA 😘

✨What's one area of your writing that you think needs the least amount of improvement?

I answered this one here so I'm gonna answer the opposite, which is "which needs the most amount of improvement". I have a lot of bad writer habits like being overly wordy sometimes, using lots of adverbs, lots of unnecessary weasel words, and while it's not really an issue in fanfic, if I want to pursue original writing I should probably be more thoughtful about these things. And honestly sometimes I just wish my writing was snappier.

🫘 Spill the beans. What's a new project you're doing this year?

Ok for what it's worth I talked about upcoming projects here, here, and here. BUT LET'S HAVE ANOTHER. One I'm super excited to finally get to is the 1940s noir AU I've been sitting on for a while now. I just really love Alex as the grizzled PI and Henry as the homme fatale that comes crashing into his life and turning everything upside down. I also can't wait to play with femme fatale tropes but put them in a masculine context and give Alex all the (unexpected, unwanted) feelings about it.

🦄 Is there a new POV you'd like to try writing?

I said here that any new POVs would probably be OCs, but it would also be fun to do an outsider POV of like, Nora perhaps? Bea? I don't think I've written either of their POVs. OOOOH ZAHRA. Man, that would be a cool one.

🦖 Are there any fandoms you wrote for in the past that you'd like to return to?

I'm determined that I'm not going to let another year go by with only ONE TMFU fic written. So probably that one, even though I did write a fic for them in December.

[Writer goal asks for the new year]

[demigod-jack-hearth]

This is to address a situation where I had carelessly modified my Circe blog @the-goddess-circe to fit my alternate universe. This caused many people to get hurt and I am addressing it.

When I created the Circe Blog on August 8, it was with the intention for Jack to get possessed by Circe, a character I was interested in because as a character Circe is really complex and fascinating, I am not excusing her actions OR morals. She had not much canon lore to work with and I was excited at the opportunity to be able to experiment and work with Circe.

During one of Jack’s possession scenes ( https://www.tumblr.com/demigod-jack-hearth/758229800393523200/open-starter )

I thought it was a good idea to make a complete alternate universe for Circe, which is how I modified her intro to the alternate universe that Odysseus has raped Circe and sexually assaulted her. I did not think of the consequences of my actions and how I was not handling this situation OR topic with the care or respect it deserved.

This is the role play thread that started this alternate universe- https://www.tumblr.com/camp-sky-heaven-on-earth/758618332716056576/i-know-it-hasnt-been-long-since-i-asked-you-to?source=share

I did not consider how this was dehumanising and triggering the trauma other others and this was not my intention in the slightest.

For this overlook and negligence on my part,

I’m am wholeheartedly sorry to everyone, those affected by my actions and my audience who have seen it.

I realise now that I have people that watch me, people that reads the things I put out and they are very real. Their feelings are real. Their experiences are real and their stories and trauma are real. This is a grave mistake on my part, and I now understand that what I say and do have an effect on others.

I did not take the correct amount of time to think this through and do my proper research on the canon lore.

This section is to address my first anon message back on August 13 about my Circe au:

Link to the post-https://www.tumblr.com/demigod-jack-hearth/758706460356149249/its-kind-of-disheartening-to-see-you-re-writing?source=share and https://www.tumblr.com/demigod-jack-hearth/758707116707119104/if-you-realise-it-was-a-mistake-it-might-be-a?source=share

When I first received this anon message, I dismissed it as something I didn’t need to worry too much about and because of my WRONG mindset that I do not share as of now, I made a very throw away and poorly worded response.

I spoke to some people I am now not in contact with and they had encouraged me to not think too much about it and reinforced my belief that I had free reign to make alternate universes without discretion. I was also unhappy with a separate issue that caused me to have a lot of pent up anger and frustration, this does not excuse the way I replied the anon.

These conversations with people who enabled my wrong view on the situation sparked me to make my response hurtful, bitter and unnecessary.

I regret making that comment and I am sorry to the anonymous message who got hurt by my remarks.

I understand that Odysseus and Circe are very important characters whose stories should not be modified so carelessly.

Now onto the important part: What I will do to amend this situation.

I am not asking for anyone to forget or forgive this situation, but I hope to at least make some amends.

First off I will be deleting Circe’s Blog and will not be reworking it until I can get an acceptable version in the works.

Second of all this is a repetition but I apologise to everyone affected and reached by this situation. I am willing to make personal apologies at your request.

Finally, this will not happen again. I have grown and understood the situation to the best of my ability and will do everything in my power (running it past people before I post things and checking the facts) to make sure this does NOT happen again.

I'm going to tag everyone because I don't know who has been affected by my actions

@ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3 @unhinged-waterlilly @zariahthewitch @thegroovydaughterofhestia @beauty-queen-official @that-girl-cupid @ariathemortal @emdabitchass @if-chaos-was-a-boy @the-gods-strange-children @silena-daughterofaphrodite @love-lightning-forethought @fabulousdaughterofhecate @weakest-son-of-sun @chaos-pers0nified @neoptolemus-achilles-son @kaiaalwayswins @bast-the-best26 @goddess-of-bubblegum @hispanic-daughter-of-hermes @gaygirldoodles @luck-is-crucial @pink-koi-lovejoy @smileyalater @the-bosses-of-you @the-goddess-aphrod1te @cloak-of-ares @heraaaaaaaa @unproblematic-hestia @theycallmejeezycreezy @queenofthedeep @giant-prophetic-snake @reyna4ever @vicious-daughter-of-zeus @itsyourboyezra @the-smart-and-the-dumb-one @feral-hermes-child @oopsies-i-did-a-thing @creature-under-ur-bed @unfortunate-daughter-of-hestia

Thanks to my friend who helped me so much with editing this and helping me make it sense

[bts-0t-7]

So What? | MYG | Chapter 14

Pair: Hybrid Cat Yoongi x F Reader 

Summary: Running from a past that foreshadows him, Yoongi is adamant about ever turning back to his human counterpart form, in hopes that nobody would recognise him and take him away. You worked at a cafe with your best friend. As a more-than-normal day seemed to go by, you discovered something amidst your housing block. Perhaps - just perhaps, the nighttime is where the angels arrive. 

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hybrid, non-idol au

Warnings: Contains explicit language, abuse

WC: 2.7K

Taglist: @bearr02 @svnbangtansworld @vintageoldfashion @rkivemaar @bontensbabygirl @codeinebelle @ldysmfrst @idkjustlovingbts @popcatx0 @yoonjinsgirl @marblemoonstones

A/N: As promised :) hehe...

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Seokjin had come over in the middle of the night when you couldn’t sleep and inerputed him for a movie marathon. Beyond tired was a mild way of putting it. He woke up early in the morning, struggling and finally managing to shimmy out of your grasp after a long fifteen minutes. He stilled against the bed, one foot out on the floor, bed hair spiking everywhere, and head slowly turning to you as you whined about the loss of contact. Acting fast, Seokjin tucked a pillow under your arm. 

You sighed and nuzzled it, quickly falling back into the Dreamland. 

Seokjin rubbed his face and got out of bed, padding to your kitchen on soft feet to prepare some breakfast. As he opened the refrigerator, he found two lunchboxes of overnight oats. Opening them, he took a sniff, trying to sense how long they had been in the fridge. After he deemed that they were edible, he placed one on the table and headed to pack your living room as he ate. 

It wasn't long before you woke up to the birds cawing outside your window, silently cursing them to let you sleep a little longer. Just as you were almost back asleep, they started calling again, causing you to groan out in frustration. Everything has been frustrating recently. You patted the space beside you, only for your hands to touch against the cool sheets. 

Sighing, you pushed yourself out of bed, heading to the kitchen where you were sure your brother was. 

Only to find it empty with a box of half-eaten overnight oats you had just made last afternoon. You tilted your head, yawning as you tried to think. 

"That's mine." Seokjin came into the kitchen with arms full of opened snacks and dirty, empty cups. "Go take yours. I left it in the fridge."

"Where were you?" Your voice came out scratchy and hoarse, the aftermath of all the tears and screaming last night. 

"Living room." Seokjin placed the cups in the sink. "I'm surprised you walked straight past me at the couch just now." He snickered, keeping your snacks in the baskets. 

"You were probably hiding from me, waiting for this moment." 

"Nah, I wouldn't be so bad." 

The both of you started the day by cleaning your house, Seokjin nagging at you for not taking care of yourself and the place you live in. The constant "Look at the amount of dust there is on this!" and "Oh my gosh, Y/N!". At least your brain took a break from what you were running from. After dinner, Seokjin had left, saying that he was called back to the hospital. You shooed him off despite him worrying over you.

"Are you sure you'll be fine?" His brows were creased against his forehead. "I can cancel anyway. My licence is no longer valid so technically calling me back is unnecessary. So I can stay if you need me." 

"Just go, Seokjin."

"They'll probably make me stay the whole night, you know that." 

"I know that." You patted his shoulder. "Just go, I'll be fine."

With your constant pestering and deflection, Seokjin reluctantly left your house, leaving you once again in your mind. You watch as his car revered from the parking lot, driving away. You closed the curtains and turned off the lights. 

Might as well get some sleep to escape reality. 

The sad truth of that.

You had woken up just as Lillianne burst into your house screaming, “FBI, OPEN UP!” 

Groaning, you turned to the side, hands blindly grabbing your phone off the coffee table. When your sleep-muggled brain finally registered the time that your screen showed you, you shot up, cursing your way to your room. 

“I was wondering why you weren’t out yet. You better be lucky I came in.”

Hastily, you got yourself ready, shrugging on clothes like you were just caught. Technically, you were. You and Lils managed to leave the house in a record time of seven minutes, only missing your water bottle. But the water in the shop was free anyway, so you’d just take that.

Starting the car, you drove off in the direction of the shop. The moment you stepped in, you were already dreading coming to work. The shop was filled with customers. 

Good for the business, not good for your health. 

Starting the orders in the receipts, you prepped yourself for a long night ahead. Lils worked at the cashier, shoving more receipts your way as you balanced making drinks and serving to scoop ice creams. 

You were certainly not pleased with the amount of people in the shop at four in the afternoon. But it was a Saturday - what could you say?

Family gatherings, children playing around, couples on dates. It made your heart clench every time you had to serve a couple. Seeing the lovey-dovey looks they send each other reminded you of a certain hybrid. Shaking your head, you tightened your apron and continued. The coffee would not make itself and the food would not serve itself. 

Oh, how you would love that. 

Then, you wouldn’t have to constantly run about. But that is the nature of the job. One could only expect so much from a food and beverage job. The night went on much busier than usual on a Saturday night. Parties were held there with big gatherings and by the time the shop closed, you had heard a good four birthday songs and seen an uncountable amount of bouquets. 

Cleaning up, you cleared off the used cutleries and dishes, setting them in the sink for the kitchen staff to wash. Ensuring that no ice cream scooper is left in their respective boxes overnight, you then swept and mopped the floor before cleaning the tables. Going out to throw the trash, you grabbed the bags from the kitchen and outside. 

Spotting a black cat sitting idly at the bus stop, you gave it a small hello before speed-walking to the bins. They were heavy trash bags. There were a lot of baking and alcohol bottles used today. You weren’t sure when the cat had leapt down and followed you, but you soon found yourself stumbling over, trying not to step on the cat’s wagging tail. It walked in between your legs, rubbing its head against your calves - chasing it was more likely - as its tail swished violently. 

Its actions reminded you a lot of Yoongi. That cat loved to show affection by constantly rubbing your calves and scenting you in between your shoulders. He had said that it was a comfortable spot to sleep on. 

Your heart clenched at the thought of him. 

After throwing the trash away, you squatted down to give its head a small pat with the back of your hands. “I’m sorry, buddy. My hands are filled with syrup right now and I wouldn’t like you for you to get sick when you groom yourself.”

It followed you to the shop, stopping just outside the doors. 

“Come on in, buddy.” You gestured for the cat. 

It was dark outside and with the heavy trash bags, you didn’t take a good look at the cat, trying to work your way around not hurting it. But now that it was inside, it mewoed and continued to rub at your ankles, going around you in circles. 

“Sit.” You instructed it. It was something you hoped it could understand. And it did. 

After washing your hands, you rummaged through the kitchen for a can of tuna. Spotting three, you took them all with you and headed out. Opening one, you placed it in front of the cat. “There you go, you can have all three. I’ll go get you some water, okay?” 

When you headed back to the front, you found it prodding at the second can. “Here,” You placed the bowl of water onto the floor. “Have some water first. I’ll open it for you.” 

You were stopped with two paws on your arm, the cat jumping up onto your lap. Sitting down in a cross-legged position, gave it more space to roam. But it seemed to know exactly where it wanted to be. In the middle with his head propped on your upper thigh. Its loud purrs fill the room as you stroke it from ear to snout. 

It looks just like Yoongi.

You knew that but your conscious brain was just trying to reject it. 

It wasn’t until its moonlit eyes slid to yours did the waterworks started. Carrying him up, you looked at the cat in your arms through watery eyes. Its shocked expression and terrified meows -

Your eyes closed the moment you felt his rough tongue lick your cheek. Tilting your head away from him to not cover his shiny fur in your slob, you tucked him between your neck and shoulder, head hanging down. 

Yoongi knew Jimin was right. 

Yoongi knew that he needed to talk to you. 

Yoongi also knew the address where you stayed and worked. 

So when he overheard Seokjin asking a favour from Jimin to keep his phone on call in case you needed him, Yoongi dashed out of the house. Scurrying from Jimin’s home to the shop, his little cat paws could only get him there so fast. 

By the time he reached it, he was parched. Panting, he stuck his tongue out to moderate his temperature. He wanted to take the chance of the next customer to enter the shop and call your attention to him. But seeing you so busy, running from place to place without a stop, Yoongi decided that it was better if he waited until the shop closed. 

So Yoongi took his spot at the shaded area of the bus stop and watched you work. You were quick and agile, moving like the wind. Many times, he saw the flinch of pain and growth of your eyes when you were scared. When big groups of people came in, he could see the exhaustion in your eyes. You tried not to show the customers - but Yoongi knew better. The pain in your eyes when you see couples made his head hang. 

It was his fault.

When the day was finally over and the shop closed, Yoongi waited for his chance. Like a cat hunting for his prey, Yoongi’s attention grew sharper. He noted each of your movements and when you finally came out with trash bags in hand, he leaped for it. 

He did not expect you to spot him from far but you did. 

It made his heart swell with a feeling he couldn’t quite describe. Pride, most probably. 

She noticed me. 

Rubbing against your ankles, he meowed for your attention, glad to finally be close to you. You hadn’t recognised him and it made Yoongi feel a little… sad. But the moment you did, you burst into tears and Yoongi couldn’t find a way to stop it. He was essentially trapped in your hold. He meowed frantically, hoping that you would sense the distress in his voice and stop. But you didn’t. 

You continued, caressing his fur and mumbling his name over and over again. 

With a meow and a particularly harsh tug, he slid out of your grasp and stood on your thighs, licking your face. You laughed as he found your sensitive spot just behind your ear. Trying to get him out of your face, Yoongi held on and continued. It was better than you crying. 

“Okay, okay.” You got up, placing him on a table as he hissed from the cold contact. “I’m okay. But now I have to go wash my face since you just covered me in slobber.”

Yoongi sat up and watched your movements. From cleaning up yourself to cleaning the floor and leftover water to you turning off everything and picking him up, he didn’t dare relax. It wasn’t until you placed him in your car and wrapped him in his favourite towel did he started to feel it. 

He was holding it in for such a long time that -

Tears unconsciously slid down his eyes, matting his fur. 

He didn’t know how long it was before your arms pulled him up again, carrying him onto your lap. “Yoongs… Don’t cry… We’ll figure it out, I’ll try harder. I promise.”

But it has nothing to do with you. 

It’s me.

The silence was kept at a peaceful wavelength until you reached home. Picking him and your bags up, he cuddled closer to you, seeking your warmth in the chilly air. The moment you opened the door, Yoongi lept out of your arms and slinked through the cat door on his door, pleased to find that it had not been locked. 

Quickly shifting and changing, Yoongi left the room and slid to your side on the floor. 

You brought your hands to his face, cupping his cheeks but he did not dare grumble. He wanted this to last as long as possible. 

“I chose you, Y/N. I choose you, mate.” Yoongi confessed. 

You closed your eyes as your lips trembled and Yoongi brought his hands up to wipe away the tears that streaked down your face. 

“I’m sorry…” You whispered. 

“No, please don’t be. Please.” Yoongi begged. “You are the most amazing person ever. The most beautiful and does everything you can just for me. I am sorry. I have let you down - hurt you just because I thought it was easier to let you hate me than love me.” Yoongi let himself go, crying in your lap. “My strong, beautiful, exceptional mate.” Yoongi looked up at you, voice breaking. “I’m sorry.” 

This is one of the few times that Yoongi broke down in front of you. 

“I’m so, so, sorry.” Yoongi kneeled in front of you, head in your lap. “I’m sorry. I did not mean - I -”

You gently placed your hands in his hair, ruffling them and stroking his ears. Yoongi’s harsh sobs could be heard throughout your house. “It’s okay, it’s okay.” You mumbled into his hair, bent over onto his body. “It’s okay, Yoongs. I’m sorry too.”

Yoongi’s head tilted upwards, voice hoarse as he asked, “Why are you sorry?”

“Because I jumped to conclusions and didn’t put enough trust and hope into our relationship. And that I let this become when we could have easily talked it out properly if I had chosen the right words to tell you.” You smiled down at him. 

You had never thought that you would ever say these three words that would mean so much. You thought that our chance had been blown the moment you started that argument. You expected your chance to stay blown when Yoongi walked out of the courtroom without looking back. Saying them to Lils and Jin was a different thing from saying to Yoongi. You were always the person to express instead of say but this time -

“Yoongi,” You tilted his face upwards to you, eyes boring into his as you muttered the three words of magic. “I love you.”

From this view, you can see the widening of his eyes. 

“You - You love me?” Yoongi’s eyes sparkled with a shimmery glow. “You love me?”

You nodded, smiling at his goofy expression. Yoongi suddenly shot up, bouncing around the house - much like an excited dog might when he goes on walks. 

“You love me! You love me!” Yoongi ran to the windows. “Y/N love me!” 

Your eyes widened, hands instantly pulling him back. “Don’t go screaming it to the world! It isn’t even 5 a.m.!”

Yoongi turned, the light in his eyes knocking the breath out of you. “But you’re mine.” Yoongi’s eyes crinkled and a gummy smile was full on show. “And you love me.” 

You nodded undoubtedly. Yoongi brought you close to his chest, hugging you tightly. “You love me and I love you too.” 

“Yoongi -”

“I love you.” He shook his head, eyes shining with inner light and it knocked the breath right out of you. “I love you, wholly.”

[ewyband]

MEDIA EWY CONSUMED IN 2024

i did one of these for 2022, not sure if I did one for 2023 but here we go !! CYBERPUNK 2077

easily the most influence piece of media that has directly affected my songwriting ("sexual brain dance attractor", thats how you know i'm truly obsessed). god where do i start !! I don't have a lotta time to play video games nowadays but I started this game in february and finished it in December, took me around 70 hours? So, what, 7 hours a month? anyways, this game is gorgeous. the visuals, the world, the storytelling, god its good!! i love how in depth everything goes. especially the DLC. you'll think a mission is wrapped up but a tiny decision you made during it comes back and bites you several hours later. THATS good world building baby!! ALSO so many lines of dialogue??? its actually crazy. the world feels so alive. the city is beautiful and oppressing, the stories within it are dystopian and uplifting, society feels alive and buried. i love it, genuinely a 9/10 for me. I could go more into it but I'd be here all day. Outer Wilds

I think I technically finished this game at the start of this year. I've just started playing the DLC recently. It's an extremely good game that I can say pretty much nothing about. just go play it, trust me. 8/10

I Saw The TV Glow

I believe I already talked about this a little on here. I liked this movie don't get me wrong but it was extremely bloated and felt like it was seriously pushing its 1hr30 run time. I also didn't feel seriously affected by it since the horror the movie was ascribing, I'd already felt. maybe its good for describing the trans experience to a cis person but i just didn't really feel that strongly about it. it was an extremely solid 6/10 for me. a lotta points for the 'vibe' of the movie. it had a very strong feeling thats hard to even put into words. its like when you're a kid and you sneak downstairs in the middle of the night to watch TV and you hear the hiss of the CRT and feel the fuzz on the screen. you go to sleep and have nightmares of the living room. good vibe. The Muppet Movie (1979)

god FUCK, absolute cinema. I love love jim henson. I relate to kermit the frog an extraordinary amount. so many big hopes of making it big in an oppressive industry that wants you to advertise yourself. so many people relying on you to make that dream happen. so many people to organise. but all of thats worth it to make the dream come true and it wouldn't be possible without the friends we made along the way. i get it, i understand the rainbow connection and one day i'll find it too. 10/10 The Muppets (2011)

The jokes, oh my god, they are so funny. This is such a good fucking movie, theres not a single minute where i felt bored or like a scene was unnecessary. it really did feel like someone really wanted the muppets to make a comeback and they came out SWINGING which i guess is what the movie is all about!! I guess if the muppet movie (1979) was all about jim hensons story as a creator, the muppets (2011) is all about someone who felt so inspired by him that he wanted to bring back the magic. 10/10

The Muppets Most Wanted (2014)

It's aight !! definitely worth a watch if you like the muppets (2011) but ricky gervais brings this shit down so much. like an extraordinary amount. its like he doesnt wanna be there !! he's so flat !! for gods sake man stop being transphobic for a second, you're in a fucking muppets movie !!!!!! the opening song and the interrogation song SLAPS but a lot of the songs just don't hold up to the OGs. its a good movie but i wouldn't say its any more than that 7/10 The Muppets (2015)

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SERIES????? granted I was high as fuck throughout nearly every single one of these but these are legitimately so fucking funny. its nice to see a 'modern' spin on the muppets. some jokes were a little dated but I'm really mad this got cancelled. there was obviously a lot of love that went into this series and I thought the office style formatting was extremely well done. I just can't believe it got cancelled after only one season what the fuck disney 8/10 The Muppets Christmas Carol

the songs, holy fucking shit, what the HELL !!!!! i'd say every single song apart from maybe one or two is a straight slapper. marley and marley ?? i had that shit stuck in my head for a WEEK!! its a really sweet story and infinitely more funny knowing that

Various Disney Movies

i watched: turning red, brother bear, inside out, inside out 2, alladin, emperors new groove, kronks new groove and luca i wont go too in depth with any of these, most of them were ehhh but standouts were definitely emperors new groove, luca and alladin

i fuckin love the muppets dude

[bookiezzz]

Hiiiiii❗️ May I please request headcanons of Kazuichi, Kaito, and Gonta (danganronpa) taking care of a stressed-out male reader? (Also, I'm BIG, big on physical affection, just putting that out there)

a/n : thanks for the request!! And absolutely no inconvenience at all! I am familiar with dr1 but never finished dr2, nonetheless Dr3. definitely super happy with a Undertale request too. I had a lot of free time today so I will just finish this up now! This was super nice to write and I hope you like it!

Asriel, Papyrus, and Mettaton with a stressed-out male Reader

ASRIEL

ASRIEL is likely to pick up on your stress or burnout

I think he’d be very good at reading people, you most of all

So when he INEVITABLY picks up on your

new behavior or constant tiredness, he will try to come up with a gentle approach to the matter.

He would start holding your hand a little bit more, or hugging you from behind whenever he sees you

An occasional kiss on the cheek<3

At one point, ASRIEL begins with a more direct approach, straight-up asking you if everything’s been okay in regards to tasks, work, school, activities, your schedule in general

No matter your response, ASRIEL will inform you that he’s picked up on your change in behavior and encourages you to rest to the best of your ability

I’m SURE he would also ask you to go somewhere with him if you’re up for it!(meaning eating out, going shopping, an activity you generally enjoy!)

At the end of the day, he just encourages you to do whatever feels right and whatever helps you relax and feel good about yourself,,. he’s so sweet

ASRIEL will end it all off with asking to cuddle, relax, or spend quality time with each other, for some sense of comfort and normality.

He wishes you only the best, and hopes you relax more :(

PAPYRUS

PAPYRUS might take a bit to pick up on

But if your energy or playful manner slowly (or quickly, for that matter) depletes, he will start noticing that something clearly isn’t right with you.

And he doesn’t want to see you upset 🙁

He will come to you, genuinely concerned, and just quietly ask if everything’s okay right now

Or if he knows about the absurd amount of things on your plate and how it is maybe stressing you out, he’ll just ask “So. How’s [blank] going?”

IT MIGHT JUST BE ME but i feel like he would say some silly pick up line while asking and it kinda lightens up the mood jepshshsj??

“So, [Name], everything alright lately? You are seemingly less energetic the last few days. Maybe missing Vitamin… Me?”

followed by a mischevious “nyehehe..”

If you say it’s fine, he will most likely persist in asking until he gets an answer that he’s satisfied with.

If you say that you’re just a bit tired out (naming a specific cause or not), he picks up on that immediately and tries to play it cool. Just asking if anything will help, anything he can do, etc.

PAPYRUS engulfs you in a tight hug for a few seconds!

Hes going to look out for it more

Trying to steal you away from anything he deems as unnecessary, or anything he thinks can wait for later, and tries to spend more time with you

i know he will cook for you too

I think he would encourage you to not stress, take your mind off of it, and let it go!

METTATON

(you get a gif for this one)

I think METTATON would relate in a way, I guess?

I mean he IS pretty fabulous and has a busy, busy schedule

He would notice your behavior and at first, just tell you to take a break

When he realizes that may be impossible for you at the moment, he will share some ways to make the most out of everything, and to save time for yourself

That last bit, oh, that wasn’t an option.

METTATON will BRING you out and you will have a good time

There’s always a good time with METTATON, right ?

He tries as hard as possible to make you forget any problems and tries to relieve your stress

He would take you shopping, out to dinner, partying, or dancing

“Come on, darling! Live a little!”

If you are ever just sitting with him and he sees a worried expression, or that you’re dozing off, he’ll hold your hand or kiss your forehead/lips/cheek/hand (literally anywhere)

METTATON just wants his favorite boy, his darling to feel like himself again

He knows how fabulous you can be and how fabulous you are, and wants you to be happy, with your spark back.

[waytooinvested]

Forgotten, Not Forgiven - Chapter 28

This and previous chapters are also on AO3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first days after Kara was released from the med bay were a learning curve, to say the least. Despite (and to some degree because of) the conversation they had had about it, they were both a little nervous about the personal care aspect.

Well, a lot nervous, if Lena was honest with herself.

Even though she had insisted (to Kara, to Alex, to herself) it wasn’t a big deal, that had been when it was all safely hypothetical, the barrier of time between them and the moment it would become a reality making it all feel eminently doable.

Then on their first evening together, after the welcome home pizza was finished and Alex and Kelly had said their goodbyes, Kara admitted, tentatively, that she would really like to get a proper shower. She had had to make to with a bowl of lukewarm water at the DEO, and after her two day post-brain injury observation period she was feeling distinctly grimy.

‘Is that… okay?’

‘Of course! I bought a shower stool specially, and a cover to keep your cast dry. It’s fine’.

It was fine of course, but that didn’t stop Lena’s heart from jumping into her mouth at the realisation that all her rationalising and distance keeping came to nothing now they were actually here.

It was a big deal, it was such a big deal, what had she been thinking saying she could do this by herself? What if she couldn’t? What did she know about taking care of someone post-injury, especially when that person happened to be the woman she was in love with, who was about to be more naked than she had ever seen her before...

But Lena was a practical woman, and she didn’t let her sudden insecurity show as she helped her friend make the short trek to the bathroom.

At least, she tried not to.

She did spend an unnecessary amount of time explaining exactly how the shower worked and what each and every one of the various settings did (all the more unnecessary given that Kara had showered here before, and already knew the basics of temperature and pressure control), but that was just being a good hostess, wasn’t it? After all, Kara might fancy trying out the massage jets (well, maybe not, given her bruises) or the multidirectional spray (although that would put an end to any hope of keeping her cast dry even with the covering). It was only polite to give her all the options.

‘… So, which would you prefer?’ Lena asked, when she had finally run out of settings to describe. There was no answer, and she turned to find that rather than listening to the (admittedly excessive) shower options, Kara was focusing on staying balanced on the closed lid of the toilet while she fumbled one handed with the buttons of her shirt, unable to see what she was doing through the rapidly fogging lenses of her glasses.

‘Oh darling, I’m sorry. Here, let me do that.’

The guilt for having left her like that so long was sharp in Lena's chest, but it finally broke through the worst of her uncharacteristic dithering and galvanized her into action.

What passed between them over the next few minutes was a kind of intimacy that Lena had never experienced with another person before. Not the physical act – she had taken people’s clothes off plenty of times – but the way it felt to have Kara allowing herself to be vulnerable with her in this way. The nearest she had come to this was with Sam, holed up in her lab together while she tried to find a way to separate her from Reign, but even at their closest, when she had been holding her while she cried and begged and then bravely pushed on for another try, she had managed to retain a small degree of distance from the procedure that was absent now.

Maybe it was because that hadn’t been such a viscerally physical form of care, or because there was always the possibility of Sam not being Sam any more at any moment, so she had stayed on her guard. Maybe the real difference was just that this was Kara, and with Kara everything was different. Whatever the reason, as Lena knelt in front of her friend and carefully worked her way down a row of buttons that seemed impractically fiddly for someone who had to change from civilian to super hero clothes in the blink of an eye, she felt the truth of Kara’s trust in her more deeply than she ever had before.

When the last one was finally free she averted her eyes while Kara shrugged out of the shirt and wrapped herself quickly in the towel Lena held out to her, careful not to look in the direction of the mirror. In truth she had wondered (privately, guiltily) if the temptation to peek would prove too much for her in this moment (how many times had she woken hot and flustered from dreams about her best friend naked in the shower, after all? And now here she was unclasping her bra less than an arm’s length away...), but although Lena’s heart was pounding at a pace that made her very glad that super hearing wasn’t currently a factor, it didn’t feel sexual, and she didn’t try to look.

She was also painfully conscious of how Kara must be experiencing what was happening. Not only was she in pain and having to accept help that she hated needing in the first place, she was also accepting it from someone who only a couple of days before she had believed to have unequivocally rejected her romantic interest, only to find out that it was all a big misunderstanding and her feelings were reciprocated after all. That alone would take some time to get used to, but now they were in this strange in-between place where they weren’t quite one thing or another to each other, everything between them half acknowledged and less than half resolved.

And yet here Lena was, helping her take her pants off.

It was a lot.

In light of that Lena did her best to stay practical and respectful, forcing her hands to still as she helped Kara back to standing and affording her as much privacy as she feasibly could in the circumstances. Still, no matter how diligent she was at looking elsewhere, she couldn’t help catching glimpses of the injuries that had previously been hidden beneath layers of clothes.

Kara’s back and side were mottled with a huge, multi-hued map of bruises that darkened from yellow-green at the edges to angry purple and red towards the impact site, and her skin was scraped and raw. Even though it was mostly superficial and would heal fully within a few weeks, the sight of her looking so battered made rage surge up in Lena’s chest, and again she felt the burgeoning urge to kill whoever had dared do this to her.

Which was somewhat problematic, given that the person who had done this to Kara was… Kara.

Well. And Lex.

Lex.

Yes, this was all his fault, and Lena had let herself forget that for far too long.

Maybe they had been going the wrong way about Project Atlantis from the start, and should have devoted more of their efforts to finding Lex and making him talk, or else searching his various hideouts for an explanation of his separation process, rather than focusing so much on Kara herself.

Not that they hadn’t looked for him of course – the DEO had searched. Lena had searched. Even Superman had searched, once they had told him what had happened to his cousin and warned him that Lex might come for him next. All to no avail. None of them had found so much as a hint of where he might have gone after the bunker, or even whether he had ever been there in person. It was entirely possible that the set up had all been done through his lackeys, and that Lex himself was holed up somewhere on the other side of the world, the trail so cold it might as well not exist at all.

However, Lena did have one more card to play if it came to it. Because while Lex might claim to be indifferent to her, she was pretty sure that he would come if she called him, at least if he truly believed that she was ready to cut ties with Supergirl and the DEO and join him. It would be a delicate game to play, but more than worth it if she could get close enough to find out what they needed to keep Kara from ever getting hurt like this again.

But she wouldn’t do it yet.

Not until Kara had healed and didn’t need her support anymore, at least. That would also give her time to prepare, to make a proper plan and anticipate any counter moves her brother might make. As long as she was careful, Lex could be trapped by his own hubris into making mistakes, and then she would have him.

This time, no matter what, only one of them would walk away from this alive.

In the meantime, she would make the most of the time she had left with this Kara.

The Kara who loved her back.

Just in case, one way or the other, it turned out to be their last.

And alright, it was possible that Lena went just the slightest bit overboard with that intention. But she had promised that this recovery period would be just like one long best friend sleepover, and she damn well planned to live up to her word.

When they had finally completed their first stumbling shower-and-pajama routine and Kara had fallen into a deep, exhausted sleep in the spare bedroom, Lena fetched her laptop and got to work with online shopping. Within the hour she had orders placed for a mountain of boardgames, card games and puzzle books; a huge stack of dvds (including every musical she had heard of and several she hadn’t, plus a few choice series’ that they could get their teeth into); subscriptions to no less than four new streaming services; a bumper set of canvases, brushes and various kinds of paints in case Kara was in the mood for some artwork; and, the grand finale, a vintage play station 2 complete with a wide array of one and two player games, because she figured if Kara couldn’t run and jump for real, she might at least get some vicarious enjoyment from doing it on a screen (the console was years out of date, but her initial plan to simply buy whatever had the highest ratings had changed when she saw that this one came with a particular game that she was pretty sure was going to be the crowning glory of the lot).

To round it all off she also scheduled a grocery delivery that would fill her cupboards with all Kara’s favourite snacks, a few of her own choice comfort foods (just to keep her company) and, after a brief hesitation, a large packet of marshmallows.

Then Lena went to bed herself, feeling tired but satisfied, and more peaceful than she had expected to be so soon after her resolve about Lex.

That peace lasted exactly five hours and thirteen minutes.

Then, quite literally, it shattered.

Lena’s eyes snapped abruptly open at the sudden noise, and she found herself leaping out of bed and stumbling out to find the source before she was entirely awake. In her sleep-fuddled state she half expected to find a man with a weapon and a grappling hook climbing through a smashed window (she was probably over due her next assassination attempt, and given her high security a mere casual burglar was unlikely), and wished that she had thought to grab her gun.

But there was no intruder. No weapon. No smashed window.

There was just Kara, red cheeked and balancing awkwardly on one leg, attempting to pick up the shards of a broken water glass with her injured hand while the other clung determinedly to the counter to try and keep from falling.

‘Kara! What on Earth are you doing?!’

Lena hurried over to her, but Kara gestured her back before she could step far enough into the kitchenette to steady her.

‘Don’t come any closer! You’ve got bare feet, you’ll cut yourself.’

‘So have you! Why didn’t you call me if you needed something?’

‘I didn’t want wake you up, and I was fine by myself, I only came out for a water refill.’

Pointing out the near-impossibility of carrying a full glass back to the bedroom with only one arm and leg available would have been labouring a point that had been better made by the mess at their feet, so instead Lena went to fetch a chair before Kara lost her precarious grip on the counter and smashed more than just the glassware.

‘Sit down for a minute while I get the this cleared up, then I’ll help you back to bed.’

‘No, no it’s fine, I can do it, you go back to sleep.’

‘Darling, that’s not how the whole ‘looking after’ thing works. Especially not when you are barely out of hospital and can hardly stand on your own, let alone walk. Now would you please sit down before you fall down and get a butt full of broken glass to add to your other injuries?’

Kara grimaced sheepishly, but sat.

‘Okay… I’m really sorry about your glass, I was trying so hard to be careful.’

‘Oh, that doesn’t matter, I smash them all the time. But please call me next time. I can buy more glasses. I can’t buy another Kara.’

‘I mean you probably could, if you really put your mind to it.’

That startled a laugh out of her, for all Lena was still sleep-drunk and mildly alarmed from her rude awakening.

‘Okay, well I don’t want another Kara. I want this one, thank you very much. She happens to be my favourite.’

‘Even though she smashes your things?’

There was a slight wobble in Kara’s voice that made Lena stop what she was doing and look up at her, concern creeping in to replace the humour.

‘Hey… Kara, it’s okay. You’re not really upset about the glass are you? Because it really really doesn’t matter. I’ve been known to smash them on purpose when I need to vent, it’s absolutely not a big deal.’

‘It’s not the glass, exactly. It’s just… I’m kind of a wrecking ball right now trying to learn how to manage with only two fully functioning limbs, and this place is all so… expensive. I mean, it’s lovely, obviously. But also kind of scarily immaculate. What if next time I break something actually valuable? Or… I don’t know, drip spaghetti sauce on your white couch? There is so much white.’

Lena put down her dustpan and brush and went to crouch beside Kara’s chair, broken glass crunching under the boots she had quickly stuffed her feet into before starting the clean up. She took Kara’s uninjured hand and squeezed it firmly in her own.

‘Okay, Kara, look at me. I promise I don’t care about any of that. What I do care about is you feeling comfortable. I want my home to feel like your home, at least until your leg’s out of plaster. So, what can I do to make you feel more at ease here?’

‘Well... maybe you could put away anything breakable or stainable that’s worth more than… say… five hundred dollars?’

‘Oh. Uh. Sure…’

Her tone must have betrayed her, because Kara narrowed her eyes, looking simultaneously suspicious and alarmed.

‘Lena. Please tell me you own things that are worth less than five hundred dollars.’

‘Of course I do!’

But looking around their immediate vicinity, Lena actually couldn’t see anything that fit the description aside from the basics of crockery, food stuffs and the dust pan and brush, which she suspected didn’t really count.

‘Name something.’

‘Well…’ she struggled ‘...that flower arrangement?’

‘OH MY GOD LENA.’

‘So I have expensive taste! It doesn’t mean I care if something gets damaged. There’s nothing here that you could break, stain or lose that I would be particularly upset about. They’re just things. Seriously, you want me to smash a Ming vase to prove it? Because I will smash the hell out of that priceless antique if it’ll make you feel better.’

‘DO NOT DO THAT.’ Kara yelped, and then after a moment added ‘...do you seriously own a Ming vase?’

‘No Kara, that was a joke. And plenty of things here are worth less than five hundred dollars, but it’s 4am, I’m very sleepy and none of them happen to be in my eyeline right at this moment. I’ll put away anything really valuable though, okay? And if anything does get broken, I absolutely promise you I won’t care. Just as long as the thing that gets broken isn’t you.’

She decided not to mention that there actually had been a Ming vase in her father’s study when she was growing up, and that while it wasn’t really to her taste, one or two things she did own would rival it in cost.

‘Okay...’

‘Okay. Now lets get you back to bed, and if you need anything at all in the night then you call me. Because if I find you out here on your own again I swear to God I will get in that bed with you so you can’t sneak out without me noticing.’

Kara laughed, and Lena was relieved to note that the worried edge was gone.

‘I wouldn’t mind if you did.’

[snowyroads]

Hello, I'm about to go on a yapping session about my feelings on different football rpf ships because i'm up and can't sleep! :) grab your popcorn and get ready. I also just want to do this cuz i feel like i haven't given y'all an insight on what goes on in my brain.🧍🏻‍♀️(i started this last night when i was half asleep lol)

joemarr- THIIISSS ONE! okay, clearly this is one of my favorites. (if you couldn't tell from my mass postings about them or amount of fics i have) i feel like a lot of ppl have different opinions on their dynamic and somehow I agree with every single one. i think every since LSU days, Ja'marr has worked on Joe getting out of shell. not to call Joe introverted (because we all know that man could get it) I just think at the beginning with him being new to the team and not knowing where he fitted in, Ja'marr was the one there for him and take him under his wing essentially. THEN, I think Joe did the same thing for Ja'marr when he got drafted to the Bengals. because dude literally told his coach to choose Ja'marr. (some fan behavior right there) and when ppl were starting to doubt Ja'marr's abilities as a WR, Joe was immediately there to back his man up. I also think that little pinky thing they do IS ABSOLUTELY CRAZY. cuz wdym!??? i think i could write a whole essay just about that stupid handshake of theirs. it's something about seeing two grown ass men, join their pinkies together as a sign of 'friendship' and then going on their merry way afterwards like they just didn't interlock their souls together? OH. ALSO, the fact that they don't even call what they have a friendship, they both say relationship when referring to each other. cuz that's totally what normal bros do, yk? GIVE ME A BREAK. WE KNOW WHAT YALL ARE. the clothes buying? the teasing each other? Joe wearing JA’MARR’S JERSEY!? ok im not even done with everything i have to say about them but we'll leave it there for now.

Stefon/Josh- they actually make me want to scream. when i actually first found out about football rpf, they were the first ship i read about and i fell IN LOVE. but i found out about them too late and only got to enjoy two years of them together before the divorce. HAHAHA. (it's actually not even remotely funny) One of the best moments i think i saw between the two of them was when Josh was giving a pre-game speech one time and Stefon was so hyped, he jumped up and helmet bumped Josh's chest. wanna guess what happened next? at the next pre-game speech, Josh put his hand on Stefon's helmet to 'calm' him and stop him from making any unnecessary head bumps. Another moment that was crazy to me was the amount of just touching the two of them would do. like they always had to be connected in some way! AND the hugs after that lions game, the one where Josh literally looked like he couldn't breathe until he got his arms around Stef? WTF. THEY MAKE ME SIIICK. how you go from saying you wanna grow old with someone to giving him a half hug after a game? HUH? i just have to tell myself that they actually text everyday and that the side eye was just for dramatic publicity. Stefon will always be my #1 DIVA! <3.

koc/jj- okay, this one is still kinda new for me BUT it aint hard to tell what's going on with these two. for one, KEVIN IS SO FINE. IDCCC. shit i don't blame you Justin. AND JUSTIN IS JUST SOOO. UGH. he's the definition of babygirl. which is crazy cuz i never thought i would see a WR and go "babygirl?" BUT W JJ I DID. and then i just think Kevin can't help himself when he's around Justin. Always all up on him and in each other's personal space. like damn we get it. we all wanna fuck that old man. and we all think jj deserves to be treated like the princess he is! which makes them perfect for each other. It also just automatically has that tension to it because they are a coach and player relationship, so it gives "we can't get caught" ANYWAYS, ik there is so much more with them too but that's all i can think about right now.

Mike/Tua- ALRIGHT, they don't get the recognition they deserve! and i think that's because they don't have a lot of moments between them but when they do, it's big and they go viral. like the head kiss we got after Tua’s concussion (which i actually hope he thinks about his life before a career in football) and they have that same coach/player dynamic like koc and jj. also, i think Mike McDaniel is too hot for his own good. mhm. especially when he wears those glasses. OMG. anyway, im getting ahead of myself. Tua is literally the sweetest human being ever too and i remember watching hard knocks last season and their relationship and chemistry is just…WOW. (which is also why i can’t wait till this year’s with the Bengals comes out) idk how to explain it.

Brock/Fred- once again, they are both fine AF. ITS INSANE. also, size difference goes crazy. ANYWAYS. (there’s not a lot on them either so this is more just what i feel about them) Brock being Mr. Irrelevant and being the last pick in the draft, going from sitting on the bench as a 3rd string QB to STARTING is so personal to me. and he was scared as hell having to start so randomly in the season but Fred was there to pick him up when he was down and give him all the confidence he needs! Fred being a vet and teaching Brock how to be confident in himself and his abilities to be the best QB for their team. AND THEN, Brock takes them to not just one but two superbowls!? (ik they didn’t win but still it counts for something) i also just find Brock/Fred to be the definition of golden retriever and black cat energy. Brock’s the golden retriever ofc (have yall seen that clip of him saying “hi mom!” to the camera?? OMFG) Then Fred is the black cat because he’s always so nonchalant to me. like when the camera pans to him on the sideline, dudes got a straight face as they’re winning like 34-10 (ik that hasn’t rly happened this season but we move on) BUT YEAH, yall see the vision right??

okay if you’ve made it this far tysm!! <3 these football men make me crazy. i hope yall enjoyed my yapping session and feel free to ask or share anything!! <33

[simonthechaste]

I posted this on Facebook a year ago. At that point I still channeled all my erotic urges into making captions, and managed to create quite a lot of original content on this site here as well. A less than a month later everything changed, and my caption making became unnecessary, because suddenly I had an amazing woman in my life I could fulfill all my erotic fantasies with, as well as who adores me being as sexual as I am. That is something I feel is the most amazing part in my relationship with her. Before she entered my life the amount of time and energy I put into thinking about sex and masturbation was something I was ashamed of. 

For the light of my life however it is something she truly admires in me. Or, as she has oftern put it, how "inventive and imaginative" I am when it comes to sex, masturbation or ways I can pleasure her, or ways she can torment me.

She loves when I suffer for her, when he gets to inflict pain on me, and it turns her on immensely. And she simply loves to see or hear me masturbating, and pulling my limp penis for her, and it visibly turns her on. In other respects as well my life has gone forward in ways I could have never imagined. It's all thanks to her. She doesn't see it quite like that, and feels I should take more credit for it myself, but the truth is I wouldn't be where I am without her.

A year ago though I still hadn't recieved that surprise Facebook message from my old college friend who I haven't been in contact with in 15 years, telling me she was going visit the old stomping grounds and asked whether I wanted to meet her. Naturally I did, and that was it. It was less than a year ago, as hard as it is for me to believe it. If you have read this far, and still want to reblog this post, feel free to do so. All I ask is that you don't remove the text have just written. Show some respect, people.

[snekdood]

i have compiled some native plant gardening tips for those of whom are new to it based on my own experiences and trials and errors, so here goes:

if you're germinating seeds, dont use coco coir. it sucks. ignore anyone who tells you to use it. it doesnt hold moisture well at all and doesnt decompose well. look for a "seed starter" soil instead, it will have a bunch of beneficial nutrients n such to get the seeds and their roots going. if you're concerned about peat, there are plenty out there that don't have any, coast of maine comes to mind. I used to think I needed to grow them in a sterile env, mostly to prevent mold, but I find that nearly impossible to avoid, so on to my next tip:

you're better off trying to start your native seeds outside. even if you wanna use cell trays, thats fine (bring them in when it freezes though), but preventing mold when germinating inside, especially in your fridge with all your food you sometimes forget is there and gets moldy, i've found to be nearly impossible. granted, mold isnt always a bad thing, it can help eat the seed coating so the roots can grow, but this obviously isnt true for all seeds and especially not small seeds. outside is your best bet, I just find less mold grows out there. might be good to make a mini green house of sorts to keep your seed trays in, obviously thats unnecessary if you're growing them in the ground.

if you're like me and have no real ground space and only have a patio or balcony and have to grow everything in pots, I have a couple tips for you actually, but for now lets focus on winter protecting your plants. most suggest burying them under ground... im assuming like me that isn't really an option for you, so we're gonna come up with another solution. you're probably going to need to invest a good amount of money into this, depending on if you have the material around or not. but to start off:

huddle all your pots together. they can help insulate eachother better and keep eachother warm. i try to put the least cold hardy ones in the center, if you can, put them all together in a larger container like a bucket or something and cover it with lots of mulch. water sparingly and lightly, enough to wet the soil but not enough to drip through the bottom of the pot. you should be sparingly watering anyways in winter, but especially so here since they'll probably be in a container that doesnt drain unless you want to drill in holes on the bottom. try to make sure the pots dont touch the sides of the containers if they're plastic and fill in the gaps with mulch or something, plastic isnt the best material to use for pots regardless, unfortunately its the cheapest and most readily available and comes in varying sizes so I cant get mad at you for using it.

heavily mulch your plants. maybe put some straw on top of the mulch too if you have any. I used to think leaves were enough but there's too much airy space between them, you want to make the insulation as compact as possible. if you're wanting to make a place for bumblebees to hibernate i'd suggest making an entirely different leaf pile or something unrelated to your plants. (obv doesnt apply to ppl growing stuff in the ground bc you have the privilege of being able to sprinkle leaves wherever you want. bastard.)

invest in some burlap fabric and some cheap towels or blankets for even more insulation, the fuzzier the blanket the better imo, but it should be fine whatever you choose, just try not to get too thin of a fabric. the burlap and blanket/towel might not be necessary to use every day but definitely on days where its below freezing. these also will last you every year, assuming you take care of them right. cover the tops of pots but also wrap around the sides of them and maybe put a layer or two of burlap down on the ground under them, esp if they're on cold hard concrete.

if you have any plants with tuberous roots, they are more vulnerable to freezing if they're in a pot and will need extra protection or to be brought inside during a freeze, to not shock it with a temperature shift try putting the pot in the fridge if you can, otherwise again it might be good to try to make a mini green house of sorts, maybe turn one of those plastic window well covers into one? or put it in a garage if you have something like that. they also, maybe obviously but just in case, dont need to be watered as often since they have lots of water stored in themselves.

putting your pots really close to the walls of your house can also help keep them warm. not sure if its enough to prevent them from freezing but combined with everything else? well, it's survived many of my plants over the last couple years (though i didnt know about the tuber thing until recently and it explains so much why certain plants didnt make it >_>)

ok moving on from winter. lets go back to talking about pots, bc seriously if you can get your hands on ANYTHING besides a plastic pot, jump on it. they suck universally. they suck in winter and in summer. their only benefit is providing some humidity but that's not really something I personally need as someone in a temperate climate. also, the lighter the pot the better. dark plastic pots can cook the roots of your plants in the sun in summer so you have to be extra careful. also, the deeper the pot the better for native plants.

because you're growing native plants in pots, they're going to need a lot more extra care. native plants in the ground can pretty much be neglected since nature takes care of it all, but you have to provide the water, soil, fertilizer, etc. so lets talk about that:

you dont need to water every day necessarily, the old trick of watering when the top 1-2 inches is dry is your best method to go by. if you live in the midwest or northeast or anywhere it gets heavy rain, it would be good to give them a deep watering every now and then, I try to follow what the rain does and water at the same frequency as it. it would be good to water daily (maybe only a small amount if the soil is still somehow wet) on really hot days even though you dont have to water every day, like on days above 90 degrees. also the best time to water, especially in summer, is early in the morning, ideally some time before 8, 9 is ok but 8 is better imo bc it gives the roots more time to absorb the water before the sun evaporates it, and around 10 is when that starts happening. if you have to water at night, water early at night and try to avoid watering the leaves if you can as water left over on them overnight can cause mold, mildew or other diseases. if you have to water mid day, at least wait until the sun isnt directly on the plants so they can actually absorb some of the water.

since you have to provide your own water and cant rely on rain, you also have to provide your own fertilizer. I mean you already did before, but I mean liquid fertilizer. rain transfers all kinds of vitamins and minerals to the plants that receive it, but you're likely not getting nearly as much in your tap, and since your pots likely aren't being shat in by various woodland creatures, they're getting even less fertilizer. so you have to provide the fertilizers, both slow and liquid. I thought I could just get by with slow release but the plants seem to do better with liquid too, especially when in bloom. if you use slow release you dont need to use the liquid fertilizer as often, and you also likely dont have to use the liquid as frequently as it says on the bottle, since native plants generally require less nutrients to begin with, but of course this is something you'll probably have to test on your own to see how much your plants want and tolerate. I have a whole feeding schedule I can share if you want. some brands I've been using for liquid fertilizer are foxfarm (they have good soil too), microlife, and maxsea (technically a powder but you mix it with water) and for slow release is foxfarm again, jobe's organics, and lilly miller's. I'm trying to use as organic of materials as I can since I'm growing the plants for native wildlife and pollinators and I dont want to negatively effect them as much as possible. if anyone wants to know what products I use specifically hmu or leave a reply.

I trust you're able to figure out your soil situation on your own, but here's some tips just in case: try to avoid brands like miracle grow since I'm pretty sure it has inorganic materials in it, generally I'd aim for the most organic thing you can find, assuming you're growing native plants for the same reason I am, for nature. also, take those messages about well-draining soil seriously, you can use perlite but also some soils are just lighter than others, I find foxfarms is pretty light and drains well.

during winter, leave the plants as they are, dont cut them down. lots of bugs and animals have made nests or homes or have cocoons n such in there. you can cut it down in the spring when frost is nor longer a concern, but dont throw it in the trash either bc the bugs might still be sleeping in them but will be less vulnerable now that winter is gone.

ok that's all I can think of for now, I'll add on to this if I think of anything else, but hopefully this is helpful for someone out there :]