#But I do know why this didn't happen sooner
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impactrueno Ā· 17 hours ago
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Beetlejuice clearly wasn't interested in Lydia when they met, so when do you think he actually fell for her? Was he so impressed by Lydia defeating him that he developed a little crush?
i think this might be the biggest thing i've been turning around in my head since the sequel dropped. how did bro get to this point. i need to know. you weren't like this where we left off, what happened during that huge time gap????
this is where canon ends and conjecture begins, you just have to theorize and fill in the gaps yourself with whatever makes the most sense to you, which is what i've been trying to do this whole time. so please bear with me here.
i don't know how much i want share or save for my comics because i don't know how much he would actually reveal about this but whatever we ball
edit: ok so i scrolled back up to this after finishing writing this and as it turns out i have no self control and i ended up sharing everything that crossed my mind. craziest stream of consciousness i've ever written down. strap on and keep your limbs inside the ride at all times. whatever. we BALL.
let's review their first encounter from his point of view:
you're hired to scare the deetzes, right? so you do just that. excellently you might add. just when you're about to terrorize their teenage daughter, barbara banishes you and the party is over. what fucking losers right? you get the sense that adam and barbara care about this girl so you make some remark about her and it pisses them off. haha. also whoa where did this place come from? damn adam, who could've guessed he had it in him. you forget about everything else and dance your way to dante's inferno room.
after spending a respectably tasteful evening with those ladies, you're chill now. relaxing under your little sun lamp to work on your tan.
someone walks in looking for adam and barbara. don't they know they're dead?
"are you a ghost too?"
"i'm the ghost with the most, babe."
hold on a sec, who's evenā€”
...well hey. it's the girl.
the girl who can see ghosts, and she's talking to you.
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target acquired. this one's your ticket out of this hellhole.
"you look like somebody i can relate to," you tell her. relate how? doesn't matter. you're ensnaring her with your affable demeanor like you always do, make people feel like you're pals with them first and foremost. she seems like a nice girl, so this should be easy. you tell her upfront that you want to get out of there and you need her help to do so.
"i want to get in," she says.
whoa there.
what? she wants to get in? she says that in response to you saying that you wanted out. she really has no idea what it's like on the other side, huh. but shit, that kinda stops you in your tracks a bit. this girl wants to die. this young? that's not right. makes no sense.
"...why?"
she just looks at you and says nothing. jesus. ok maybe it's none of your business so let's back it up. you're losing control of the conversation and you're on a mission here. you figure if she helps you get out, you might as well talk her off that ledge or show her how shitty it is on the other side or somethin'. frankly, you can't afford to care right now. you're not entirely sure why she thinks things would be better on the side you're so desperate to get out of, but alright. doesn't matter, right now you gotta get her to summon you. so you begin your little game of charades.
after she correctly guesses your name and almost says it a third time, she recognizes you as the snake that terrorized her family. god fucking dammit. you're losing her. you're getting impatient. your affable act is over. "nah...i want to talk to barbara," she says and now she's REALLY getting on your nerves because fuck barbara, fuck adam, you're SO CLOSE to getting out and you're not gonna let this go now, go go GO GO SAY IIIIIIITTTTTTT
adam and barbara walk in because of course they do. womp womp
ok well that didn't work, but you're not gonna give up so easily. sooner or later another opportunity will come and soon you will be free.
wait why are they moving the modelā€” where are they taking itā€”
ooohhhhh. business meeting. get a load of these yuppies, trying to turn winter river into a town-sized Ripley's Believe it or Not. a talking marcel marceau statue? and you thought you were a con man. no wonder the deetz girl wants to die, it's bleak as hell here too. but if you get out...you can fix that. hell, you can fix anything.
these bozos are here to see some ghosts, but the girl says they're not going to show up unless the fleshbags stop making a mockery out of the whole thing and that maybe they can all live happy together in the house. ain't that sweet.
of course no one's taking her seriously. she's a kid, what does she know, right? they'd rather listen to the most obnoxious guy in the room (besides yourself) who has no idea what the fuck he's talking about, but somehow, he's got his hands on the handbook.
the girl panics, then immediately says completely deadpan "wait, what am i even worried about, otho, you can't even change a tire" and you're surprised they didn't hear how hard you cackled at that.
despite all that, they seem to have started a sƩance with their old wedding clothes. bad news for the maitlands. they're about to be dead-dead. the girl cries for them to stop, and these guys are just sitting there scared shitless. you're hearing everything. you knew a new opportunity would arise, so you wait, because this is the part where people remember how good at your job you are. they always do.
she knows you can help. you're the only one who can help. so here she comes. those wedding clothes give you an idea. plan B is now in motion.
well well well.
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look who came crawling back.
she asks for your help, and you're happy to oblige, under one condition of course. after all, you don't do anything for free, and she's the only one who can help you with your problem. how serendipitous.
once again, you lay it on her, straight up. you want out. and a way to do it (thanks adam and barbara for the reminder) is through marriage with a fleshbag. you need to get married. a green card marriage, if you will.
she's immediately disgusted by the idea. you don't take that personally, of course, because it doesn't matter. she's just a kid and it's not a real marriage. she just happens to be unlucky enough to be the only one around who can assist you with this, the poor girl. it's a marriage of convenienceā€”or rather, inconvenienceā€”and you're not planning on sticking around because you will get the hell out of there as soon as you can. so there shouldn't be a problem, right? besides, does she know how many women would kill to be in that position? she gets to brag about it to her friends, what's not to like? it's a totally even deal.
the clock is ticking and the maitlands aren't getting any younger. she agrees to the deal. you win, at last.
she already knows what to do, so you sit there patiently with a shit-eating grin on your face, awaiting the three little B words. gloating.
Beetlejuice........Beetlejuice...........Beetlejuice.
it's showtime.
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this is your favorite part. you love a dramatic entrance. you decide to show the deetzes and their greedy friends the circus they so wanted to turn this town into. horrible as you are, you're also pretty damn good at calling out other people's horribleness, and you do love an ironic karmic way of dealing with someone. for example tubby here thinks he can escape, but not before you change his sleek black suit into a tacky white leisure suit. the horror! this is why you're a professional at this.
you effortlessly end the exorcism and the maitlands are saved. a little pruney right now but they'll be fine. everything is taken care of, you have fulfilled your end of the deal like you promised. only one thing left to do.
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"shall we?"
there's really no need to make a whole show out of this, but you're a showman first and foremost and as a š’„ļæ½ļæ½ļ潚’¾š“š“š’¾š’¶š“‡š’¹ š’¶š“š“Šš“‚ you'll be damned if you're not gonna let yourself have a little fun with this. everyone looks terrified. this is why you're a professional at this.
witnesses and reverend in place, you can finally begin the ceremony. you're having fun, yes, but let's try to pick up the pace a bit, okay? the closer you get to your goal, the more impatient you get. the girl isn't finding any of this very funny at all and she protests. the maitlands butt in and are now kind of twisting your arm a bit, but you deal with them harmlessly, until they get on your last nerve so you send adam to the model and barbara to saturn. all of this after you honorably fulfilled your end of the bargain and saved the day. jesus christ, are you the only one with some integrity around here or what.
you forget the stupid ring. shit. you're pretty sure you have it on you somewhere, ever since you chopped up delores into pieces for poisoning you. you kept her ring finger as a trophy and as a reminder to never get married again, and yet here you are, but desperate times call for desperate measures. finally, you find the ring (still on her severed finger) and hastily tell your new bride-to-be that delores meant nothing to you. in case she even cares. she doesn't seem to. not even a chuckle? oh well.
almost done with the ceremony. almost there. you're holding the girl's hand with an iron grip to keep her in place as you're about to put that ring on her finger. "i now pronounce you, man andā€”"
a tiny car crashes against your foot and it catches on fire. you scream. a fucking sandworm crashes into the room through the ceiling. everyone screams. you scream LOUDER.
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you're sent back to the afterlife waiting room.
not your first rodeo with a sandworm, but that doesn't make the experience any less shitty. the real annoying part is being in the waiting room again. this could take ages. you're number 9,998,383,750,000 and they're serving number 3 right now. you trick the guy next to you and steal his ticket (number 4) but he's not too pleased about that, so that didn't work.
a long time sitting here it is, then.
movie ends, credits roll.
for reference, that was 1988. winona ryder was 15 when they were filming in 1987 so while lydia doesn't have a confirmed age, i think we can safely assume that she was the same age as winona at the time.
36 years later, it's 2024. or 34 years later, it's 2022. we don't know the exact year because while bob's in memoriam credits scene says 2024 and all the interviews talk about how 36 years have passed in universe as well, there's this other one tiny detail.
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jeremy's death passport says he died on march 11, 1999. jane butterfield says he died "23 years ago," putting the movie in 2022. they did film it in 2022 so the math is mathing correctly there. given that the in memoriam scene was more of a joke and jeremy's passport is a canon prop in the movie, i'd say 2022 is the canon year the movie is set in. (small sidenote; the passport also has the roman numerals DCLXVI which is 666. cute detail i loved it)
in the sequel, beetlejuice says lydia has been ignoring him for 30 years. i always thought that was curious because outside of this claim, they always specify how many years exactly have passed since. he doesn't say 34 or 36, he says 30. and for his degree of obsession (and the fact that he remembers exactly how many times he's watched The Exorcist) i think he would be counting even the days so i think he did really mean 30 years. so this would mean at least 4 years passed between getting sent back to the waiting room and the beginning of his stalking.
AND NOW that we established all that, we are finally getting to the answer to the question, "when and how did this all start?"
so okay, he spent a while in the waiting room. a lot of time to think. probably replaying the events at the deetzes' in his head over and over, how he got here, where he fucked up, what's he gonna do once he gets out. cursing the maitlands for ruining his plan when he was soooo fucking close. wondering what ever happened to lydia deetz.
lydia deetz, the young girl who told him she wanted to die.
...
is she alright?
i don't think he's capable of feeling guilt, but we can probably argue that he's not entirely heartless. what she said about how she wanted to "get in" must've stuck with him from the way he reacted when she dropped that bomb. she never showed up in the waiting room so he knows she didn't follow through with that. still, he used a vulnerable young girl for his own selfish gain. ironically enough, he knows exactly how that feels, because he also got tricked into marriage and got used for someone else's gain. the difference being that he dealt with that shit with an axe.
much much much to think about for mr. juice.
after years of ruminating in that waiting room, he's finally out and back to the regular day to day afterlife. definitely gets chewed out by juno, maybe forced to do community service or labor or what have you, he basically just needs to clean up his act now. this freelancing shit is becoming more trouble than it's worth anyway.
he's still wondering about lydia deetz. should he check in on her? maybe he should, he's too curious now.
at this point, lydia is now about 19-21 and in college. maybe he manages to sneak into the model one time she's back home for the holidays or something. and oh my god would you look at that, what a beautiful young woman she's grown into. she's radiant. she's happy. she's no longer that gloomy suicidal kid he met in the attic. seems like what she said about the deetzes and the maitlands sharing the house did come true after all.
that's nice. very sweet. good to know.
maybe he wonders if she remembers him and tries to get her attention somehow, give her a little scare for old times sake or whatever. for a brief moment it seems like she saw something and her expression changes, but she shrugs it off and continues on chatting with her two sets of parents. no such luck.
oh well. curiosity sated! and beetlejuice goes back home and doesn't return.
until the next time he returns.
and he keeps coming back to check in on her, telling himself he's just making sure that she hasn't killed herself or something. and he's not above admitting that with every year that passes, she keeps getting more beautiful. and to think they almost got married, huh.
he constantly tries to get her to notice him somehow, and sometimes she almost does, but ultimately he never really succeeds beyond making her do a double take. very rarely she does catch a glimpse of him. he's seen her mutter to herself that she's just seeing things and she seems a bit frightened every time this happens, but there's nothing to fear, honey, it's just good ol' beetlejuice. he won't lie, he gets a bit of a rush every time and it makes his dead heart beat faintly. he's gotten this far, he can't just stop now. in his mind, this has become their little private game of cat and mouse, where the mouse ignores the cat. but aren't they cute? he thinks they're cute. this is not creepy at all!
before he realizes, he's already learned everything about her. he knows about richard and even watched their wedding from afar like a loser. he knows she gave birth to a healthy baby girl named astrid. he knows they have a blast on halloween. halloween is lydia's favorite holiday, and his too. sometimes he can't help but see the three of them happy together and think it could've totally been him. even if he and richard are nothing alike (in fact could not be more opposite) and the circumstances of their unholy wedding were nothing short of grim and a farce. but in his mind, he's starting to convince himself otherwise.
maybe it's his jealousy speaking, but lydia doesn't seem to be that happy with richard despite everything. even though richard is like, the perfect guy. then one day his suspicions are proven correct: neither of them knows why it happened, but after having a long and emotional talk (that he watched with a bucket of popcorn) they decide to get a divorce. he pumps his fist, feeling victorious for some reason. sure he's a little sadistic at times, but why is this giving him so much glee?
the divorce is hard on lydia's kid, who was always more attached to her father, but they still spend a lot of time together. sometimes the three of them, since richard and lydia kept things amicable after the divorce. lydia tries to move on and see other people, but each relationship fails before it even starts. mostly because she keeps holding back and so fails to connect with anyone else, but also sometimes because, well, he can't help himself but to scare them away from her from time to time. it's fun. in his mind, he's just being protective of her, as a gentleman should for a lady.
then richard dies. fell into a piranha infested river from the looks of it (he saw him at immigration one day, don't ask what he was doing around there, force of habit after constantly making sure lydia hasn't killed herself yet.) it's devastating for both lydia and astrid, straining their relationship even more for the next few years as they both try to cope with the loss. the shock proves to be too much for lydia, so she goes to a survivors retreat to work through her trauma, both from richard's death and "unresolved feelings."
then lydia, at her most vulnerable, meets rory.
beetlejuice was able to clock him immediately. a textbook manipulative opportunist, he himself knows the tactics very well. swoop in to "help" someone in a vulnerable position, pull the wool over their eyes and begin taking control so you can get what you want out of that person.
he wouldn't admit it, but this really irks beetlejuice. you know when you see someone who reminds you of the worst parts of yourself, so you despise them? yeah. he's been there, and he's also been him.
but rory is somehow even worse than beetlejuice. see, rory is her manager, and boy does he manage to get on his nerves. he takes her phone. he controls what medication she takes. he blames and guilt trips her about every mishap that HE causes, making himself look like her benevolent savior and making her feel like she would be lost without him, confusing her with his psychobabble. on top of all that, he's forcing her to do this hacky show called Ghost House where she "hunts ghosts" or whatever. the houses he's been helping newly-deads with in his day job as a bio-exorcist (now with a fleet of employees,) she's "hunting" those ghosts now. it's so dumb. it never works. beetlejuice doesn't even know what the hell she's doing, she's phoning it in most of the time and she knows she's become a sellout. what happened to that "strange and unusual" girl who stood up for her ghost friends when those suits wanted to profit off of them back in winter river?
he needs to bring that back. he's the only one who can.
in his mind, beetlejuice has already rewritten the events that transpired. in his mind, lydia has been his wife this entire time, it's just, y'know, one of those open long distance relationships and she doesn't always remember him, but that's okay. in his mind, they share a psychic bond that allows her to sense his presence or see him in her dreams from time to time. he's got nothing to be jealous about, because other men can't compare. no one else can match what they have.
sure, part of him knows he's lying to himself a little bit. but he's already clung to this idea; these past 30 years wouldn't make sense otherwise. he's in love with lydia deetz. this isn't insane of him to say at all. and if it is, well, you know what they say, love makes you do batshit crazy things.
it's not that complicated, no matter what they say you'll never meet another me it's not that difficult to get my head around i'll never meet another you
the end
don't trick me into writing a fanfic again
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koolades-world Ā· 2 days ago
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have three really great ideas but this one was brainrotting me more so you get this one first. may or may not be inspired by myself and the amount of birthmarks i have personally (i do actually have all the birthmarks listed!) if you guys want a part two for solomon's birthmarks and mc doting on him, let me know. i could make that happen!
i can't explain it but i kept thinking of that one solomon and his wives post written by my beloved mutal alba while writing this. not sure why, but i'm giving credit where it is due. please go check her out!!!
this can read a little suggestive so read with caution! however, i think it's very very cute!! <3
birthmarks
"Hey, Mc." Solomon looked up from the book he was reading. You were seated not too far from him, sitting cross-legged on the ground surrounded by papers you were organizing.
"What's up?" You didn't look up from what you were doing.
"Have you ever heard of any old wives tales behind birthmarks?" He asked.
"Well, that was out of the blue." When you paused, he continued to look at you expectantly. "Yes, I've heard a couple. The first one I thought of were they were how you died in a past life." You let out a snort of laughter at the expression that crossed the sorcerer's face.
"That's not the one I was thinking of." He shook his head.
"Then, you must've been thinking of the one where they're where you've been kissed in a past life. If the death one was the case, I would've had some brutal deaths." You recalled the simple, yet romantic myth where every birthmark was a kiss left by a lover of your past. You much preferred that outlook, even if it wasn't real.
"That's the one. Now, I'm curious..." He trialed off, giving you his best attempt at puppy dog eyes.
"You could've just asked in a normal way. You're my partner. Asmo must be rubbing off on you." You got up, and joined him on the sofa.
"No, Asmo would've just asked you to get naked." The two of you giggled together at the idea. In his defense, he was right.
"Do you have any birthmarks?" You wondered how he'd thought to ask something like that in the first place.
"Maybe you'll get to see later, if you're lucky." Solomon winked at you.
"Solomon!" You smacked his arm, to which he pulled you into a hug back.
"Maybe you can help me find each and every one..." He voiced died as the words left his mouth. He ran a thumb over the birthmark on your cheek, his touch gentle. You could tell he'd already moved on from that idea despite how enthralled he'd seemed with it a second ago. "This a cute spot to have one."
You had many birthmarks, but the one on your cheek was the one most easily visible. "Thanks. I must've gotten lots of cheek kisses." You remarked. "Is this the one that got you thinking?" You put a hand over his, which was still on your face.
"You read my mind." You studied his face of oddly deep concentration. While he was looking at you, he didn't even realize he wasn't meeting your gaze. Instead, he seemed to be memorizing your features.
"Compared to the others, this one is small." This comment seemed to snap him out of his stupor.
"Where are the rest?" His hand stayed on your cheek, but seemed ready to move to the next area at any point.
"I've got a fair amount on my arms and hands. There's one on the base knuckle of my right index finger, and another just underneath the first knuckle of my left ring finger." He took both of your hands in his, moving to study them next.
"You were well loved." He threaded your fingers together. "They were sweet to you, and married you." You began to grow shy once you realized the implications of the birthmark on your ring finger, and a little upset with yourself for not realizing that sooner.
"I'd never thought of that." You cleared your throat, and pushed past the mild embarrassment. "I also have one on my left forearm, and one on both of the backs of my shoulders." He let go of your right hand to run his fingers up your arm and to your back, but held steadfast onto your left hand. He remained silent, his lips a thin line.
"I have one over my heart, and one in the center of my chest." You pressed a finger over the center of your chest where you knew the mark was. Solomon's frigid hands settled over your heart. You hoped he couldn't feel how it was racing under his touch.
"Is that all of them?" He finally met your eyes. They were filled with a tenderness you could only place as fondness.
"No, I have a couple more." You took his free hand, and guided it down to where the remaining two were. You knew he'd do it anyways. "I've got one here." You placed his hand on your hip. After steeling your nerves, you guided his hand lower down to your inner thigh. "And one here."
"You were well loved." He repeated. You'd expected some sort of snide comment about the placement of the last one, but that didn't even seem to be on his mind. You stared at him, trying to figure out what thoughts were running through his head. You left his hand on your leg, and stroked his face like he'd done for you moments ago.
"Solomon, are you jealous?" The corners of his lips twitched at your comment.
"What if I am?" He sighed. He held your left hand close to his body, and cuddled you close to him.
"Did you ever consider that maybe it was you?" You whispered.
"Me?" Solomon sounded surprised.
"I think it was you. If you don't believe that the way I do, you can replace them. That way, I have double the kisses from you, and you know for sure your lips were the last to touch me." You could tell your words were getting through to him by the way his zeroed in on yours.
Instead of responding, he lifted your left hand to his lips, and kissed your left ring finger, and ghost of a smile on his face. "Then, I have work to do, don't I?"
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h50europe Ā· 2 days ago
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BUCK / TOMMY - HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A FANDOM SCORNED!
I did some thinking. Never good, but my brain can't wrap around the breakup that came out of the left field.
Recently, it was announced that a spin-off of "9-1-1" is in the works. While no locations have been finalized, Hawaii and Las Vegas have been suggested as potential settings. The showrunner is already working on the project, with filming set to begin in March 2025.
However, one of my biggest fears has come true: the focus of the showrunners is being diverted from the current show to concentrate on this new spin-off. All the energy runs in the new project. Also, at this point, we don't know if the mothership will be renewed. Without an early renewal, we must wait until May for the announcement. That is another reason why they are focusing on the new show. I wonder if this is why the plots feel rushed and repetitive. It's nice to revisit the past, but not ad nauseam. 9-1-1 does it too often lately. What's the point in bringing back Gerard and turning him into the butt end of a joke? What's the point in digging out Abby's Tommy and hanging it around Tommy Kinard's neck when nothing was ever mentioned in the past. The focus is clearly not on the current show. It feels like Tim abandoned the ship to board a new one. It's fresh, it's crisp, it leaves room for a lot of things. Even if the breakup was meant as a shocker. If your focus is somewhere else, you don't see it. Right now, the mothership is leaking and starting to sink. If Tim keeps his focus on the new project and isn't invested in the current show, the lights will go out sooner rather than later.
Bringing in an established character was probably the biggest mistake Tim could have made if he wasn't meant to stick around. Bring in Mary Sue or Marty Stu to be a LI but not a character with a history that connects to so many people on the show. You can't sideline them forever. Especially as Buck's bi-arc was announced as something big. And it was big. A bit too big to be treated the way it was. The fanbase that had built around TEVAN, or BUCKTOMMY, within weeks, was massive. It drew so many members of the queer community into the show. Suddenly, many of them felt seen. Tommy and Buck were different from the other queer characters out there. Different from what was represented on any other show. People were willing to watch to get the slightest glimpse of them. Because they felt real. Their chemistry shot into the stratosphere.
And then you go and end it on such a horrible note? I don't care if the haters call Tommy a plot device. Everyone on the show is one at some pointā€”even Christopher, Eddie, or anyone else from the main or recurrent cast, Karen, for instance, the Wilson kids. You name it. Tommy Kinard came, saw and conquered. So why not give him more room? They did it with Taylor (yes, I know JLH was pregnant then, but that's reason enough? I doubt it). As I said in my other long post, you could cut in a sequence of 5 minutes and show a summary of Tommy's and Buck's life.
Tim makes the same mistake as many showrunners do. Cramming a shitload of plots into 42 minutes of airtime. Is it really necessary to tell that many stories in such a short amount of time? That feels like speed dating. You blink, and you miss an important scene. Every episode, you jump from plot A to B to A to C to B. We didn't have this fast pacing in season 1 or 2. Stop it. Make Quality plots over quantity stuff.
In Tommy's voice: And for God's sake, clean up that mess you created with that shitty breakup, or the audience will wither away.
I'm sorry. I could write a book about what is happening in my head. You'd get Super Brownie points if you made it here.
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dcviated Ā· 2 days ago
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"Nah. It's not a party, I didn't get any invitations or hear anything about it. " Since, understandably, Gurin got invited to all of them (guess how many Veril did) "Next one's in a week or something. Look, it's not our problem for now, we deal with that later once we have a better cover story for ourselves if we even need one. And as long as your shit works we don't have anything to worry about that, right?" If only he was aware of how prophetic his words were.
No sooner does he hear the mutterings of Ukolai while navigating the path to the nexus does he recognize the trouble. This is why he thought Blythe was crazy before for wanting to see their archdemon! Ukolai was never alone, he always had-- company. In addition to the shadow guard there was always the showoff and right hand (though it was more like right arm), Dravok.
Gurin knows it before the mass even opens their toothed maw. Their plan is kaput. Blythe is about to shine out to those lenses like a great blasting beacon. There's your party, Veril. You made it!!! The snarl locks between his lips, but the glare he shoots down to the portly demon could burn like a sun if he twisted his gemmed wrist for a spell. Maybe later. Maybe if they live. Hells damn all this. Where was his luck?!
"Counterfeit gems, are you fucking kidding me, Veril? You put Blythe's safety behind counterfeits?! Move." He's seething but his mind is attempting to race past that, to find some way out or some plan. This goes way past feelings or emotions. Is he the only one that realizes that- if this went in any way wrong, it could be a fucking war?! Zeyrfial doesn't joke around with this girl! He doesn't joke around with anything!
"Blythe. You--" He turns to look at the nothing space, face wrinkling. "You stay with me. Aight?"
Ironic, really, that the one most capable of ridding him of the memories haunting him was the one that had inflicted them, isn't it? That cold chill still lingered, and the occasional goosebumps that crawled up his spine were well attributed. And yet, survival can't be sustained by just hiding away, now can it? Lose face? In front of guys like Veril?
Not gonna happen. Gurin has some dignity as a demon. Even if he's not the best guy. Definitely not the kind that Blythe ought to be hanging around, and yet here he was, wasn't he? About to step in front of one of the guard that protected his boss for her. Because. Hells what else could he do?!
Nobody else was going to touch her if he could help it.
"Ah ah ah, oy oy oy, how about you ease up and stand down, Dravok. This one's mine, actually." Gurin sighs out, a gestured up hand tapping a finger to the other's chest and giving them a feeble push back. There's yield, but not a whole lot. Gurin was lacking in the physical stature (who wasn't next to Dravok) (Ukolai really liked to have the model guard be flashy huh). Still, at least now he was a body between them and Blythe. "You think this guy can manage any kind of pull, you kidding?" A thumb over to Veril, who was now going to be the biggest butt of every solution Gurin came up with.
As expected, the belittlement of others is an agreeable course of conversation for the domineering brute, their toothy grin spreading as Gurin continues, lifted brows encouraging all of their amusement.
"Potential man here is potentially our biggest problem sometimes. Ah... But. Listen. This one's a leftover from that shindig with Q last week, trying to keep it hush. I'm trying to get her to The Molten Host since I got a guy who can do the branding and marking there."
Gurin leans over, looking past to the nexus where noise continued.
"Seems like you got bigger issues to deal with than a damned, don't ya? What all's going on there anyhow?" Excuse, remedy, into a diversion of topic. See if a casual 1-2-3 doesn't help clear the air for them.
Blythe was completely enrapt, bright emeralds boring into Gurin as he explained the layout of his home. A clam. They were inside a giant clam! How did that even work? Was it still alive? If they were inside the mollusk then where was the mollusk nestled? Her jaw drops to ask her ever-growing pool of questions, but she hesitates as he continues after a brief pause.
It had been obvious to Blythe that mentions of their first meeting brought him a lot of discomfort. Even just her presence (regardless of their current predicament) seemed to make him uneasy. The memory hadnā€™t been pleasant for her either, but she didnā€™t carry any scars from that night other than a deep anxiety to never have Zeyrfial yell at her like that again.
Veril also remembered that night well. Heā€™d found Gurin crumpled, pierced, blood pooling around his hanging form. Gurin cursing as Veril cleaned the wound, used what little healing magic he knew, and bandaged him up. The grumble of thanks as he limped him back to his quarters. Veril hadnā€™t asked any questions that night, but the pieces were slowly falling into place now that heā€™d met the cause of the incident.
The red-skinned demonā€™s smile grew more as he watched his friend flounder. It was so odd. Normally Gurin was so suave with women, whisking them away with a wink and silver tongue. Gurin didnā€™t need to tell Blythe anything about this place, but it seemed that he was doing so to put her at ease. Not because he wanted to seduce her, but because he wanted to assuage any worries she may have. To give her reassurance that he had a plan, and everything was going to be fine.
And then the elevator doors opened.
Blythe doesnā€™t move right away, in awe of the main hub, but when she notices the crowd coming for them to take their own elevators to their own destinations, she gasps, scrambling behind Gurin and latching on once again. Veril is quick to reactivate the necklace with the snap of his fingers, hissing as other demons pushed past. ā€œYea, Brenn! Watch it!ā€ Trying to position himself in a way that would keep Blythe safely nestled between the pair (which was rather difficult now that she was invisible), their merry(?) band made way for the thick of the crowd. How unfortunate that theyā€™d have to pass through in order to make it to the main lifts.
Blythe stays completely silent, using all of her concentration not to trip or bump into anyone, while simultaneously eavesdropping on all the passersby. Veril quirks a brow, throwing a look at Gurin. ā€œIs it a holiday or somethinā€™? Whyā€™s everyone scrambling around? Whatā€™s the hubbub all about?ā€ If Veril would take five seconds to listen in, like Blythe, he would hear the whispers of his coworkers.
ā€œā€¦Ukolai came personallyā€¦.ā€ ā€œā€¦ breach in securityā€¦ā€ ā€œā€¦.his whole guardā€¦ā€ ā€œAn inspection?ā€ ā€œNo no! A celebration?ā€
ā€œShit.ā€ Verilā€™s curse startles Blythe, and she looks up to find his gaze trained on a formally dressed, bespeckled demon. ā€œDravokā€™s hereā€¦. which meansā€¦.ā€ Dravok was a large demon, and an even larger asshole. You had to be when you were the head of an archdemonā€™s honor guardā€¦ He was doing his job, scanning the perimeter when his eyes fell on an unusual sight. The glasses he was wearing were special. Expensive gems cut thin that allowed those who peered through to dispel any magical tricks or disguises. You never could trust anyone.
Especially those who were invisibleā€¦
ā€œVERIL.ā€ Reflexively, the portly demon stiffens, and all eyes shift to what most would see as just a duo. ā€œWhat in the hells are you hiding this time?! How many times have I had to have a talk with you about using counterfeit gems?! You better have a damn good explanation this time or else.ā€ The crowd parts, allowing the blue-skinned guard a path directly to them, the rest of the guard filling the gap around Ukolai. And itā€™s only now that Blythe realizesā€¦ Dravok is staring right at her.
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Panic sets in. Should she run? Should she hide? Maybe she was overreacting? Maybe it would all be fine? She begins to quiver as the guard stands before her, towering, muscular. Blythe is swallowed by his shadow, and thereā€™s no mistaking it. Heā€™s looking down on her. ā€œAnd who might you be? A new pet?ā€
Blythe contemplates answering, but instead ops to tug on Gurin, shaking only getting worse. She was caught! What would happen to her now?!
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idledreams4 Ā· 7 months ago
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hmmmm... Eating nothing until dinner three days in a row probably isn't a good thing
Time to play the "is it anxiety or depression that's making me not hungry" game I guess
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the-stove-is-divorced Ā· 10 months ago
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Remembering I can draw fanart for my own fics, SO BEHOLD! The most mentally sound halves of a fusion imaginable! Technically a redraw of art I did way earlier for the same fic! Flexing my art muscles and thinking about these two is good for the soul. Love them. Bastards to write though. I can't wait to write them fused back together, but we're not here yet and it's AGONY.
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terrorbirb Ā· 1 year ago
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I think permanent corrective actions and root cause analysis exist solely to cause people with OCD and anxiety disorders to ruin their brains.
#totes bro#every time i make a mistake i make 3 mistakes#1 i mixed up letters in a word and pulled the wrong thing#2 i know i mix up numbers and letters so i should have had a system in place to prevent this#3 whatever system i come up with is guaranteed to not be permanent so if anything similar happens its also my fault#and then it's 'if you keep asking why what is the cause of the problem'#and the answer cant be human error or lack of funds so its some system i didnt design always#and this is sthe same thing if someone else makes a mistake because i didn't design a process that would have prevented that#and once again whatever i do change is guaranteed to fail in the future and then it's nicole didnt you try to fix this already#but often its like some tangential problem like i pulled the wrong qty of the right item#i tell my therapists this and they ask is there an answer where i am not to blame in this entire company and the answer is no#ā™„ļø#because I design the processes and if people dont follow the processes its because i designed them wrong#anyway! having really bad anxiety hours#I've tried to bring this up and I get told 'well design a better process where this isnt the problem ' and that.... misses the point#Because now the problem is i feel anxious because i failed to make processes that are infallible (which is the expectation) and so i need t#make a process to handle my anxiety which is guaranteed to fail#and is also my fault that i feel the anxiety because why didn't i correct for this sooner when i started my anxiety#they say these things like 'look on the bright side you can improve' and really i cant because even if i do i wont fully improve#which you know makes the permanent corrective action not permanent#and they say you know permanent doesnt mean definitely permanent but then any time theres a problem theyre like 'why wasnt it permanently..#and i try to say you told me last time permanent doesnt mean permanent and its no. bad. youre just trying to stop short of a well polished#process. look at 5s#and it starts over and over and over#i try to say the way we do this doesnt work for me because everything is my fault even if its someone elses error#and because it causes me anxiety because I know no process is perfect but it was supposed to be permanent#but hr my bosses everyone just do not empathize with me at all and cant figure out why im anxious and how this makes it worse#because there's room for improvement!#also if its not clear many of the mistakes are because im dyslexic
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inmirova Ā· 1 month ago
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"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(
#repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns#im not unsafe btw just. :^) scared :^)#tired.#starting to stop walking on eggshells kind of. in a cowardly way. like responding some of my real thoughts but at 4am#i want to scream. im not like that but i want to yell and tell her to leave me alone forever and i just want to be able to rest !#and to not be afraid. i want to move. i want to drop off the face of the earth. i want to go to bed. i want to stay awake and on guard.#idk. im tired. im so tired and i want it to stop. it's not even a big deal.#the thinly veiled insults bother me more than anything else. insult sandwich on compliment bread.#im so pretty im so stupid im so funny. im smart im too insecure im beautiful. im the most interesting person she knows im evil im talented#it's not even the worst thing it just pisses me off so much. do you think this is helpful to say? do you think this is normal?#do you think you'll get what you want insulting and belittling me as long as you tell me you think im attractive?#it's always how pretty i am. like some superficial bullshit is going to make up for an insult or make the insult disappear#and everyone else gets to leave but if i leave she'll die and it'll be all my fault and this is just like x y or z#and didnt i know she almost experienced trauma as a child but didnt? and how that effects her?#fuck. i hope she sees this tbh. how fucking insulting to see something someone's experienced and say that couldve maybe happened to me#but the person who couldve done it lives in another country and never came here.#what the fuck. what the fuck.#so it didnt happen to you? you cant lay claim to it at all? yet you think you understand me or that even if it did happen it's all the same#im going to lose my mind. im so. fucking. over it. but im a coward and i dont want her to die so ill grin and bear it.#and she'll tear out all my skin and ask if it's a little too much and ill say it's fine and she'll say im so gorgeous but i'm disgusting#but at least im kind. and ill say okay. because if i say anything else it's a threat on her fucking life.#tbh im only posting this now bc i know no one will likely read it. perpetual coward when it comes to this shit#because if i tell someone the full extent they'll ask why i didn't leave sooner. but i did!#i left and i got bombarded and overwhelmed and i was so tired of being scared of running into her everywhere#and i just. eased back in. and said it would be less this time. and it is so much more. it is so much worse.#ive lived in that fear before and i was so tired of it. it was a big reason i moved so far for college. and i cant just run away#so this seemed better. but it's so much worse. id rather hide every day of my life. keep an eye out everywhere and run away.#it wasnt so bad really. it was tedious and nauseating and i only ever explained it to one person. but it wasnt impossible.#this is much closer to impossible. this is soul crushing every day. and the things she does arent even as bad i dont think#it just doesnt stop. at least in high school i eventually got it to stop. i just had to be avoidant. this. wont stop.
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keeps-ache Ā· 3 months ago
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almost done with this second part, i am SoFast :33
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augustinewrites Ā· 6 months ago
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yesterday afternoon - after an unsuccessful coffee shop date - youā€™d decided that dating sucked. it was much too awkward and formal and not at all like it was in the movies, putting too much pressure on the people involved.
last night - after watching shoko flirt her way into free drinks - youā€™d been tipsy enough to take her advice.Ā 
casual sex! it doesn't have to be with a stranger, just pick someone you know. someone youā€™re sure you won't fall in love with.
this morning youā€™d woken up to find gojo laying in bed next to you.
you lay shoulder to shoulder with the one person you should not have picked, staring up at the ceiling, waiting for the other person to speak.Ā 
ā€œdid we reallyā€“ā€Ā 
ā€œthree times,ā€ satoru confirms happily, rolling onto his side to grin down at you. ā€œi'm surprised we didn't do this sooner, really. our sexual tension has always been off the charts.ā€
when he leans in to kiss you, his lips meet your palm as your expression wrinkles. ā€œdonā€™t get familiar.ā€
ā€œweā€™re naked together in bedā€“ we slept together in more than the literal sense. canā€™t get more familiar than that.ā€Ā 
ā€œand this never happen again,ā€ you promise, refusing to look at him.Ā 
ā€œwhy? because youā€™re afraid youā€™ll fall in love with me? itā€™s okay to admit it. i'm extremely lovable.ā€Ā 
youā€™ve seen the way girls fawn over him. how they swoon over his pretty eyes and confident smile. heā€™s satoru gojo. a legend amongst jujutsu society. youā€™re no one in comparison, not a user of an otherworldly cursed technique, not from a major clan.Ā 
people like him donā€™t fall for people like you. youā€™re afraid of rejection, afraid of being hurt.Ā 
ā€œweā€™re friends,ā€ you tell him honestly. ā€œi donā€™t want to risk ruining our friendship over something like this.ā€Ā 
he tilts his head as your look at him. ā€œshoko told you to try casual sex, didn't she? why not with me?ā€
ā€œshe told you?ā€ you groan, dragging a hand down your face and making a mental note to never ask your roommate for advice for anything ever again.Ā 
ā€œhey, look at me,ā€ he urges, grasping your hand. you do as he says, meeting his earnest gaze. ā€œi can be casual and chill, itā€™s not like i have a huge crush on you or anything.ā€Ā 
itā€™s so hard to say no to him. you really wish you could.Ā Ā 
ā€œiā€™ll think about it,ā€ you tell him, rolling your eyes when he fist pumps. ā€œbut you need to go home before shoko sees you.ā€Ā 
but youā€™re dealing with satoru gojo, who almost never does what heā€™s told. ā€œyouā€™re not getting rid of me that easily. come here.ā€
he winds an arm around you, pulli my you in so youā€™re snug against his chest. explicit memories of last night flash through your mind, sending heat through your veins.
Ā ā€œi canā€™t.ā€ you tell him (though youā€™re mostly reminding yourself.) this is insaneā€” satoru, what are youā€”ā€
youā€™re cut off when he shushes you, whispering letā€™s sleep in for a little while longer.Ā 
he starts to drift off again as you struggle to escape his grasp, but your efforts are futile. even on the throes of sleep, satoru is stronger than you.Ā 
so you give up, resigning yourself to a few more minutes ofā€¦cuddling. shoko isnā€™t a morning person anyways.
after a minute, you find it's not entirely awful. itā€™s a purely physical reaction. gojo is good looking, even with his hair mussed with sleep and his mouth hanging open. because you know that under the softness of his skin lays defined muscle, and spending the morning in his nicely toned arms isnā€™t the worst thing in the world.Ā 
(itā€™s purely physical, is what your head tries to convince your heart, which is beating a little faster than usual.)
a very soft, content sigh slips past your lips.Ā 
then, shoko knocks on your door.Ā 
ā€œhey! donā€™t tell me youā€™re too hungover for grocery shopping.ā€Ā 
ā€œshit!ā€ you whisper harshly, shoving him away from you. ā€œshe cannot see you in here.ā€Ā 
ā€œafraid youā€™ll have to share?ā€ he teases, narrowly avoiding being hit with a pillow. ā€œokay, okay! where do you want me?ā€
ā€œcloset!ā€ you instruct, scrambling my around the room to make sure none of his clothes are lying around. you thrust them into his hands, pushing him into your closet.Ā 
he catches the door before you can close it, smiling down at you. ā€œarenā€™t you glad weā€™re doing this?ā€
you shove him inside, slamming the door shut just ask shoko bursts into the room.
ā€œhey,ā€ you greet, trying your best to appear casual as you lean against the door. your heart beats in your throat, as she squints at you, then lets her gaze sweep across the room.
ā€œdid you bring someone home last night?ā€
ā€œno.ā€
she looks at you. really looks at you, you think.Ā 
ā€œokay,ā€ she finally says, though you canā€™t tell if she believes you. ā€œi justā€“ i thought i saw you leave with gojo. suguru said you two were flirting all night.ā€
ā€œgojo and i?ā€ you try to laugh, but it comes out a little strained. ā€œnever in a million years.ā€
shoko only shrugs, and you let yourself relax when she turns to leaveā€¦
ā€¦only for her to turn around once more, leaning the the doorframe. ā€œwell if you really don't like him, just let him down easy, alright? suguru told me he has a huge crush on you.ā€Ā 
waitā€“
ā€œgojo?ā€
you hear a sharp inhale through the door.Ā 
ā€œyeah,ā€ she nods. ā€œyou really couldn't tell?ā€
gojoā€¦has a crush on you. it takes a few seconds to truly sink in. ā€œi had no idea.ā€Ā 
ā€œof course you didn't. heā€™s definitely got a really weird way of showing it.ā€
she turns to leave for real this time, but you wait a couple extra seconds before opening your closet, finding a wide eyed, blushing satoru staring at you.Ā 
you can't help but laugh. at his expression, at shokoā€™s revelation, at this entire situation.
dating sucks, but maybe it wonā€™t be that bad if itā€™s with him.
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thisisadecisionimayregret Ā· 1 year ago
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hm.
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comically-callous Ā· 2 months ago
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Can I request headcanons for Kurt, Remy, Logan, and Wade reacting to his gender neutral crush kissing him because they're so in love with him before apologising when they realised what they just did please?
Ofc!!
X-Men with a gn!crush!Reader who suddenly kisses them šŸ¤ÆšŸ¤ÆšŸ¤Æ
Includes: Remy LeBeau, Wade Wilson, Logan Howlett, and Kurt Wagner
A/n: I love them a normal amount. This took me a long time to write because tumblr kept deleting all of my work šŸ˜‹šŸ˜‹šŸ˜‹ But, itā€™s here now. Hope you freaks annoy it. Requests are OPEN šŸ’œ
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Remy:
It happens one day when you guys are in the kitchen cooking together
Remy (ever the opportunist) is helping you out by occasionally guiding your hands or gently grabbing your waist/hips whenever he moves past you. And you're definitely not complaining
Overall, the vibes are very flirtatious and cutesy, and you sort of get caught up in it.
After the food is in the oven and Remy is washing dishes, you walk over and kiss him.
Remy damn near drops the bowl he was rinsing, but he manages to keep his cool and almost immediately starts kissing you back
You're the first to pull away because it suddenly clicks for you that you're kissing your friend, so you break the kiss to start apologizing
"What you apologizing for, mon Ami?"
"I kissed you."
"And? I certainly didn't mind."
Remy has liked you for a while. That was pretty obvious to everyone. Everyone except you, since you thought he was just being flirty with you like he was with nearly everyone.
But, that's obviously not the case. He makes sure to make that very clear.
Once all of your feelings are cleared up, Remy pulls you closer to him by your hips and smirks softly. "You wanna try and kiss me again? For real this time?"
His ass did NOT finish those dishes šŸ’€
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Logan:
He comes back from a long mission, exhausted and not really in the mood for dealing with anyone
Well, that is until he sees you walking down the hallway. Then he decides he can maybe deal with one more person.
You're happy to see him back, wrapping your arms around him in a warm embrace that he didn't know he needed
"Ugh, I missed you!"
ā€œYou say that every time I come back from a mission."
"Yeah, because it's true."
He missed you too, but you don't need to know that.
You pull back from him just to lean in and kiss him.
That's probably the last thing he expected you to do. I mean, yeah he really like you, but he'd always been certain that you'd never want a guy like him.
After a moment of shock, he starts kissing you back, arms tightening around you
You pull away to ask "is this okay?" And he doesnā€™t even let you finish, just pulls you in for another kiss.
Sorry. Heā€™s just wanted this for such a long time.
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Wade:
He's liked you for a pretty long time. But, he knows you probably wonā€™t like him back with how he looks. And he tells himself heā€™s fine with that.
But, since you two have been friends for a while, you get curious. So, you ask if you can see his face.
He agrees eventually and pulls his mask off to show you.
Normally he doesn't get so nervous to show people his real face. But, it's different with you. He doesn't think he can just laugh off your disgust.
When he pulls his mask off and your eyes widen, he immediately assumes the worst
"Yeah. Hideous, I know. Not the chiseled supermodel that I sound like under the-"
"Wade, you're like, hot."
"Excuse me?"
He can't believe it. Actually, he doesn't believe it. After you repeat yourself, he starts telling you that he doesn't need you to lie to him and that's when you cut him off with a kiss.
He pulls away immediately just because of utter shock "Woah! Cool down, hot stuff. What are you doing?"
You tell him you've always liked him, and that you still like him (maybe even like him more) now that he's shown you his face.
He's over the moon.
"Well, why didn't you tell me sooner? We could've been doing this all along!"
"Doing what?"
And then he kisses you again. Heheheheehehehe šŸ‘…šŸ‘…šŸ‘…
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Kurt:
Kurt loves helping you with anything and everything whenever he can. Itā€™s one of the ways he shows his appreciation for you.
So, when you receive a (very minor) injury during training, heā€™s at your side almost immediately
He drags you away and makes you sit down, treating your small cut as if it were a leg that had fallen off
ā€œDonā€™t move, Schatz. I will be back with a first aid kit.ā€
ā€œKurt, you donā€™t need to-ā€œ
ā€œStay, please.ā€
So, you let him patch you up, and he does far too much for a wound that you could probably just slap a bandaid over
But, you donā€™t mind. You admire him as heā€™s crouched down to the floor, delicately treating the small cut on your knee
And then he looks up at you with those bright, yellow eyes and he smiles. And you canā€™t help yourself. You lean down to him and kiss him.
This poor boy is so surprised he canā€™t do anything. He just freezes up. So, you assume youā€™ve done something wrong and you pull away.
ā€œIā€™m so sorry. I thought- I was just-ā€œ
ā€œPlease do that again.ā€
ā€œWhat?ā€
ā€œPlease.ā€
And you do šŸ§šā€ā™€ļø
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handicappedbuenchico Ā· 1 year ago
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I've decided to make Carlos and Spencer's playlists on Youtube!
This is mainly so that I (and others who may not use/want to pay to use Spotify) can have an alternative, and probably more accessible, way to listen to the boys' playlists.
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appocalipse Ā· 4 months ago
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the same thing 惻ā„惻b. barnes
summary: during a mission, you put yourself in harm's way to protect bucky. back at the avengers compound, he wants to know why. | 1.4k words, angst with a happy ending
ā‹†.ą³ƒąæ”*:ļ½„
"You should be resting."
You don't turn your head as the familiar voice comes from behind you, too focused on the delicate art of making the perfect sandwich to look away. You are a woman on a mission. "I was hungry."
A few seconds later, he's standing next to you, leaning back against the countertop with arms folded across his broad chest. "It's been less than twelve hours since they patched you up."
He's not going to stop hovering, you realize, because that's what Bucky does when he's worried.
"Want half?" Maybe you can distract him with food.
He regards the towering monstrosity on the cutting board and the chaotic layers of meat, cheese, and veggies sticking out at all angles.
You can't help but grin as you slap another slice of bread on top. "A quarter, then?"
Bucky has the audacity to look offended. "I'm not eating that thing."
You cradle the plate in your left hand, holding the sandwich with your right, and give him a pointed look. "Your loss."
Bucky just watches, arms still crossed, as you take a huge bite. His blue eyes remain narrowed, his mouth pressed into a thin line. He's like a one-man intervention waiting to happen. You shrug and wander over to the kitchen table.
Sitting down is a bit of an effort. The wound on your side pulls as you slowly lower yourself onto the chair, but if you can keep from grimacing too hard, Bucky won't be able to tell, will he?
Your smile probably gives you away. He narrows his eyes further. "Why did you do that?"
"Because I'm hungry?"
"No." Bucky takes a step forward. "I meant why did you get between me and that shot?"
Good question. The answer is embarrassing and you'd sooner walk barefoot over hot coals than tell him the truth.
"Hm?"
Another step. "I have superhuman healing powers."
"I'll live."
"It was stupid."
"You're ruining myā€”ow," you mutter, dropping the sandwich as you instinctively put your hand over your bandage. There goes the carefully maintained poker face. You force yourself to remove your hand and look up at Bucky with what you hope is an innocent expression, even as your side throbs in protest. "My sandwich. You're ruining my sandwich. Are you sure you don't want a bite?"
Bucky is too smart to take the bait. He moves around the table, coming to stand in front of you. The whole 'arms-crossed-stern-glare' thing again. It would be intimidating if you didn't know him so well.
"You could've been killed," he's like a dog with a bone, you swear.
"But I wasn't," you say pointedly. "I'm fine."
"Fine? You were shot."
"Will you just let it go? It doesn't even...hurt...that much," you lie.
It will take a while for the super-soldier serum in your blood ā€” a weaker variation of the same stuff that runs through Bucky's veins ā€” to kick in and accelerate your healing.
Bucky exhales. He looks about ready to give you an earful, but then his gaze shifts and he notices the way you're holding your side, how stiffly you're sitting.
You move your traitorous hand away like you've been burned.
"How bad is it?"
"Huh?" you say in a deliberately casual tone. "It's...totally fine. Not bad, really. Don't worry. I don't even feel it."
There's the reason why you've never been a spy. You can't lie to save your life, apparently.
Or maybe just not to Bucky.
"Okay. It hurts, like, just a little bit...likeā€”like not even hurts hurts, just..." you trail off with a grimace as he comes closer. "More of an itch?"
"An itch?" Bucky sounds dubious.
"More of a burn," you concede. "A...mildly annoying but totally manageable sort of a burn."
"You are a terrible liar."
"Okay, so it hurts," you snap, the last vestiges of your patience vanishing. "I have an extensive hole in my side, I get it. It's notā€”I don't want you to feel bad about it. It's really not terrible, I can take it."
Bucky shakes his head. "What if it had been worse? What if they'd shot you somewhere vital?"
"They didn't."
"But what if they had?"
"Then I would have died!"
Bucky looks at you like you just kicked him. "Yeah. That's what I'm trying to say."
You open your mouth, then close it.
"You think I want that?" he asks softly.
"No." You suddenly feel very small. "Of course not, I just...just..."
"Just what?"
"I don't know," you admit with a sigh. "It's just that you are...people need you, you know? And you have a life, people who care about you, but I'm just..."
A nobody. A girl with no past, who can barely make sense of her present.
"...it would be better if it was me. That's all."
"It would never be better if you were hurt."
"Buckyā€”"
"You don't get it, do you?" he asks in a low voice. "People need you too."
You roll your eyes. "Please. You mean the team?"
"Me," Bucky says pointedly. "You think it's easy for me? When you get hurt? It kills me."
The sandwich lays forgotten on the table, squashed flat under your clasped hands. "It...kills you?"
He just looks at you for a long moment.
Your heart flutters in your chest. You have a sudden, intense urge to break the silence with a terrible joke, a quip, something light and witty to dispel the heaviness in the air and make this moment go away. But before you can open your mouth, Bucky shakes his head.
"You kill me."
Okay, that's not where you thought this was going. "What?"
"When you say stuff like that. When you make it sound like you don't matter, like it's okay for you to get hurt. Or worse. It's not."
Oh.
"Bucky," you try again, with a more serious tone. "I don'tā€”"
"Stop saying that," he cuts you off.
You realize your mouth is still hanging open and snap it shut.
"You want to know what I think?" Bucky is so close now you could reach out and touch him, if you were brave enough. "I think that you got this...thing in your head, that you're not good enough, or strong enough, or that you're broken somehow. I think that you forget that it's okay to want things. I think that maybe you think nobody needs you. That no one wants you."
You swallow. You're afraid to say anything, to move, because your heart is hammering against your ribs and Bucky is looking at you like he can see straight into your soul.
"But I do."
"Do...what?" you whisper.
"Want you."
It's the last thing you expect to hear. "Bucky, you don't mean that."
His voice drops an octave. "Don't tell me what I mean."
Your cheeks are burning. You feel pinned under his gaze. Your side is throbbing again and you have a mouthful of butterflies and it's all just too much.
You move to get up but only make it halfway before the wound pulls again and you wince. "Shit."
"Where do you think you're going?" Bucky reaches out to help you, one hand braced against your shoulder as you sink back down into the chair. His expression has softened. "You need to rest."
You really want to kiss him right now.
It's the closest he's ever been to you, perhaps. You can feel his breath on your face.
"I need to...? You really confuse me, Barnes."
"How so?"
"Well, first you tell me that I kill you, and then you say you want me. It's kind of a mixed messageā€”"
"I'm not interested in being just friends with you," Bucky cuts you off abruptly. "Is that clear enough?"
Your lips part but nothing comes out. There's a warm, tingling sensation in your chest and you suddenly can't breathe properly. "That'sā€”youā€”"
Bucky smirks, just a little. He looks almost...proud of himself? Like he's happy he's rendered you speechless for once.
You decide to take a page from his book and put him on the spot. "And what do you think I want?"
"I don't know," he murmurs, leaning even closer. "But I hope it's the same thing."
His lips brush against yours, soft and gentle. He pulls away and you want to chase after him but then he's back again and kissing you harder this time, all teeth and tongue and ragged breathing and heat.
You close your eyes. Your head is spinning and you can't get enough air but you're kissing him back now, both hands coming up to fist in his shirt, holding on for dear life.
His mouth trails down your neck, leaving hot kisses along your jawline. You let out a breathy sigh.
"Is that...supposed to help me heal faster, mhm?"
Bucky just smiles against your skin.
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brrahbrrahcharacterimagines Ā· 3 months ago
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Old Man (Wolverine/Logan Howlett x Reader)
MASTERLIST
Pairing:Ā Wolverine/Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader
Word Count:Ā 3615
Warnings:Ā SMUT 18+ Minors DNI!, Sexual themes, dirty talk, oral (fem receiving), p in v penetration (wrap it before you tap it), cum, swearing, use of "Baby" as a pet name, small alcohol mention, Older man/younger woman, Reader has female genitalia
Summary: After moving in to the mansion, you have developed quite the crush on the older, grumpy Wolverine. After he finds you walking the grounds one evening, what could happen if you face the fact that you've been flirting with each other for months?
A/N:Ā I have always had such a crush on Hugh Jackman's Wolverine so Deadpool and Wolverine is like a dream come true
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You were thankful that the other mutants had found you when they did. You had just lost your job, behind on your rent, and the most recent Tinder date had ghosted you. When a group of likeminded individuals came to you with a promise of a free place to stay, how could you say no?
Once you had arrived and decorated your room, Professor Xavier revealed the place wasn't quite free. With a mutation allowing you to manipulate food at will, he thought you may be able to help provide for all of the children and teenagers living at the mansion. Despite feeling a bit slighted, you were glad to have been given a purpose.
Over time, the mansion began to truly feel like home. You felt at peace in the kitchens, putting together meals for the other occupants. Many of the residents saw you as a maternal figure despite you not being much older than them, only being in your twenties. No matter your age, they tended to enjoy talking through problems with you over some tea and your famous chocolate chip cookies.
Something else that had grown over time at the mansion, alongside others fondness of you, was your own fondness for a particularly grumpy mutant. You couldn't explain it, as it didn't seem like you had much in common. You were generally a pretty bubbly, happy person, eager to speak with the children to help them out. The Wolverine was, well, not exactly described the same.
Nonetheless, he began to consume more of your thoughts. At first more of a schoolgirl crush, thinking about how you found him attractive. Of course you had thought about the fact that he was much older than yourself, but you didn't pay that much mind as you expected the little crush to go away over time. Instead, the crush became stronger and stronger until it was something you knew would not go away soon. Laying in your bed at night, you couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to feel Logan laying in bed next to you. Or perhaps, on top of you.
Using your powers to conjure ingredients for the student's lunch, you let your mind wander again as you worked. You imagined what it would be like to feel the Wolverine's hands on you, walking up behind you while you were cooking to place his hands on your hips. Resting his chin on your shoulder as he relaxed into you, making you giggle as his beard tickled your neck.
"Do we have any beer?" Came a voice, startling you from your daydream. What startled you most was the fact that it was his voice, as you spun around to face Logan, hoping your face was not as flushed as it felt.
"Give me just a minute," you said with a smile at him. "You know Charles doesn't like to keep any on hand since there are so many kids here," you said slyly, "but lucky for you my powers can extend to food and drink."
He sat down at the table nearby with a sigh. You tried not to notice the picturesque way he seemed to pose as he sat, legs spread and chest puffed out. Stop being such a creep!
"Why couldn't he have found you sooner?" Spoke Logan. The lazy smile on his face as he said those words made your face hot, hoping he didn't notice as you got to work on his request.
Handing him the drink, your fingertips brushed his. As you moved to let go, you felt him linger.
"Thanks, bub," he said, looking up into your eyes as he took the drink from your hand. You turned away quickly, resuming your work in hopes he didn't notice the way that his stare made you heat up.
Thankfully, Logan chose not to stay long. Once he left the room, you felt you could finally catch your breath and focus on the task at hand.
-
This was a pattern that the two of you fell into. Simple conversations never lasted long, but they always seemed to end with a linger. Oftentimes you would find yourself trying to sneak a glance at the man, only to meet his own eyes before shifting your own away quickly.
You tried not to look too far into those moments, after all, there's no way that Logan would be looking deeper himself. Surely it was a coincidence, or perhaps it was merely a symptom of the social cues he tended to ignore in favor of brashness. He never seemed rude during conversation with yourself, but it may be correlated. At least, that's what you decided to believe. Allowing yourself to believe the alternative, that he was purposefully flirting with you, could never end well. You were not going to open yourself up into that kind of disappointment.
Walking the grounds of the mansion, you took in the cool autumn air. After a busy day, you thought a walk in the moonlight would be the perfect thing before making your way to your bedroom. It was a futile attempt to clear your mind before trying to fall asleep, even though you knew despite your efforts your mind would still drift to Logan before you did so.
With a sigh, you took a seat down on a nearby bench. Looking up at the sky, you were grateful Charles did not allow much light pollution nearby, allowing you to admire the stars.
"The hell are you doing out here?" Came a gruff voice from behind you, making you jump. Even though the suddenness of the voice breaking the silence making you jump, you knew who it was immediately.
"I could ask you the same thing, Logan." You said, turning to find the man coming up on the bench. He rounded the corner, motioning to the empty seat next to you as if to ask permission to sit down. You nodded, and he did just so.
The two of you sat in silence, taking in your surroundings. At least, that's what you assumed he was doing. The only surrounding you could take in now was him. He smelled good, like smoke and a cologne you couldn't place. Your thigh brushed against his seated so close, and as soon as your leg touched his it felt as if it could have caught fire, spreading through your body quickly. The power he had over you was undeniable, and you pled that he wouldn't notice.
Looking over at him, you saw him looking into the distance. You took the moment to observe the way he looked under the moonlight. His hair looked soft, as if begging to have hands run through it. The stars reflected within his eyes, giving them a subtle sparkle. Your eyes trailed down the slope of his nose, down to his lips. You were sure that if you were to kiss him, his facial hair would tickle your cheeks in the most delectable way. You felt your breathing deepen.
Logan turned towards you, a look that you couldn't quite place in his eyes.
"What are we doing?" He asked.
You felt your heart clench, unsure if you should be confused or nervous.
"What do you mean?"
He chuckled, "you know what I mean. As if you weren't checking me out a few seconds ago." You turned away in embarrassment, feeling your face heat. He continued, "we've been dancing around it for months. I should have put a stop to it a long time ago."
You felt your body heat in embarrassment even more. Not only had he noticed how you felt, but just as you assumed he did not reciprocate those feelings.
"I-I'm sorry," you said softly. Afraid that if you rose your voice any louder, you he would hear the wobble in your tone. You didn't want to cry in front of him, especially now.
"I'm the one who should be sorry," he said with a sad chuckle. "It's not your fault. When I said I should have put a stop to it, I mean an old man like me shouldn't be flirting with a young thing like you."
So he was flirting, you thought. Even though he seems regretful now, at least you know you weren't looking into something that wasn't really happening.
"It's not like I wasn't flirting back," you said with a sigh. "If I wanted you to stop I would have told you."
You could feel his eyes flip to you quickly, as if he was surprised.
"What did you just say?"
"I-I would have stopped you?"
A smirk made its way slowly onto his face.
"You wanted me to flirt with you?"
Your face scrunched in confusion at his words. "Was I not obvious?" There is no way he didn't pick up on your feelings. "Did you not just comment on me checking you out literally minutes ago?"
His smirk only grew, "maybe I just thought you were naive. Good to know there's more to it."
"You were flirting with me, thinking I was just naive?" You questioned, a slight burst of confidence making you reflect on what he had said previously. "A young thing like me?" He faltered at your words.
"What do you-"
"You said so yourself," you purred, confidence clouding your judgement, allowing you to reach toward him to place a hand gently on his outer thigh. You were sure to note his sharp intake of breath as you did so, only emboldening you further. "You liked flirting with me didn't you, Old Man?"
He nearly groaned at your words, sending a rush through your body. his eyes, previously glued to your hand placement, flicked back up to your eyes. They didn't stay there, and you noticed his heavier breathing as his eyes began to flip between your eyes and your mouth. Not wanting to wait for him any longer, you leaned in, pressing your lips to his. You were right, his beard did tickle.
You kissed Logan softly, moving your lips with his as soon as he got over his shock. The softness of your lips on his, paired with the near-innocent way you kissed him drove him crazy. Logan's arms made their way around you, pulling you towards him so that you were sat on his lap. His strength was already known to you, but the ease of his action still made you squeak. If he can move you this easily while kissing you, your mind ran wild with what else he could be capable of.
He deepened the kiss, leaving you just about breathless. Your excitement, and ego, only grew as you felt Logan's own excitement growing under your lap. Hands frenzied across his chest, grabbing his shirt while he continued to use his arms to press you close to him. You didn't even register you had begun moving your hips against him until he pulled back, his head rolling back with a groan that was purely sinful.
"You're a little minx, you know that?" He grumbled, but made no move to stop your motions.
"Logan," you whimpered, batting your eyelashes at him with wide doe-eyes. His last thread of self-restraint snapped inside of him as he heard his name fall from your mouth. He had already let himself go much further with you than he had planned, but now that he's heard how you sound saying his name he needed to hear it, again and again and again.
He rose from the bench quickly, grabbing your hand in his much larger one.
"Come on," he grumbled, pulling you along with him. He moved hastily, but you kept up easily. His pace only made your growing sense of arousal quicken as well.
Before you knew it, he was pushing open the door to his room. The room matched the man, and you noticed how it smelled like him too.
"Sit," he commanded motioning to the bed. You had never thought yourself one to obey a man so easily, but something about his tone made you do as he said. Logan made sure the door was locked behind you both before returning to you quickly, taking your lips in his own again. His tongue darted out, running across your bottom lip. A moan escaped you involuntarily, and he relished in the noise. To have you here with him, so needy, so willing, so young. Even though he knew he should have blocked himself off from you as soon as he heard you were only in your twenties, he couldn't deny the fact that it only turned you on now that he had you in this position.
He held your thigh with one hand, using the other to snake under your shirt to cup one of your breasts over your bra. You moaned again at his touch, only encouraging him further.
"Take it off."
You pulled away from him just far enough to grab the hem of your shirt, pulling it up and over your head. You then reached behind you, unclasping your bra and throwing both articles of clothing to the floor.
Logan smiled, eyes not leaving your breasts as he spoke.
"Well damn, I just meant the shirt but I'm not complaining."
The blush that rose to your face spread down to your chest as well. The way you flushed at his words was gorgeous to him. He never wanted this vision of you to stop. There was a part of Logan that was still convinced he may be dreaming.
Wasting no more time, he laid you down. His bed was much softer than you would have guessed. One hand made it's way to one of your breasts as his mouth made its way to the other. You moaned as he squeezed one breast, using his tongue to flick over your nipple on the other. The heat pooling between your legs was nearing a point of becoming uncomfortable. From the rigidity of Logan pants where they pressed against you, you could assume the same was true for him.
You reached down, palming him through his jeans. Already, you could tell his size would break you. It's not a thought you minded. He groaned at the contact, the vibrations making their way from his mouth to your nipple. Every part of you felt on fire, overheated as each touch of his sent you deeper into arousal.
You gasped at the sudden loss of contact, Logan pulling away to pull his own shirt off his head. You made no attempt to look away from him, taking in his built chest and abdomen. You wanted to put your mouth all over him.
"Like what you see?"
He pulled his jeans off before crawling back on top of you, one hand fingering each of your nipples as he attached his mouth back to your own. He captured every moan of yours into his mouth, as if devouring them would mean he could hear another.
Your hips has a mind of their own, craning upward towards the bulge in his boxers. As your clothed heat came in contact with him, he reciprocated with a growl, grinding down into you. Your mind spun at the increased contact, heat continuing to grow in your belly.
Logan pulled away from you again, making you whimper. His mouth trailed down your body, stopping at your breasts before continuing further. His fingers looped under your waistband, and he looked up at you as if asking for permission.
"Please, Logan," you whined with a wiggle of your hips. With your confirmation, he nearly tore the bottoms from your body trying to take them off so fast. Revealing your panties to him, he groaned as he saw the way that they were clearly soaked through. He loved the effect he was having on you.
The panties didn't stay on you long though, tore from you as well as you felt his warm mouth find your cunt. His tongue licked slowly from your hole up to your clit, nearly making you scream. Your hands found their way to his hair, tangling your fingers in his tufts. The soft tug from your fingers make him moan into your pussy and you tucked that information away.
His speed increased, tongue flicking over your clit in sloppy circles. Your moans and whines only continued to spur him on, and you felt a finger prodding at your entrance. He pushed it in slowly, feeling your velvet walls clench around him.
If one finger feels this good, you thought, how the fuck am I going to take him?
He began to fuck you with his hand, adding a finger when you were ready and pushing slowly in and out of your soaking pussy. Combined with the movements of his tongue, you felt yourself reaching your peak quickly.
"Logan, I-" you whimpered.
"Come on baby," he said gruffly, only backing off your cunt long enough to get his words out before continuing his motions. "Cum for me baby. Show me how good you taste."
You moaned at his words, it being all you needed to push you over the edge. Your body shivered at the intensity of your orgasm, walls clenching around his fingers. Logan eagerly lapped up your juices as you came, only slowing down as your moans became breathier as you came down from your high.
" 'm gonna fuck you now baby," he growled. Despite having just orgasmed, his words sent a wave of tingles to your core. "That sound alright?"
You nodded, looking into his eyes as he made his way on top of you. He leaned down to kiss you, and you could taste yourself on his tongue.
"Use your words."
He took his length into his hand, mesmerizing you with the way he lazily jerked it in his hand.
"Please," you whispered.
"What was that?"
"Please, Logan, fuck me!" You cried.
"That's it," he said cockily as he pressed the head of his cock to your entrance. "Damn you're fucking soaking wet for me, aren't you?"
You could only moan in response, his cockhead stretching your walls as he entered you. It hurt as he stretched you in the best way, feeling more full than you ever have before you had even felt him bottom out. When he finally did, he used every ounce of restraint to stop himself from moving too much as he allowed you to adjust to his size. Before too long, you began to squirm under him. Your hands roamed his body, from his abs to his chest to his arms. With the way you whimpered under him, he was glad for your motions as he wasn't sure he could stay still much longer.
He began pulling out, before pushing back in tantalizingly slow. You moaned wantonly at the movement, feeling his dick twitch inside of you. You wiggled your hips, trying to push closer to him.
"Logan," you whined as if begging. Looking into his eyes, you could see how dark they were with lust. His pace increased, only making you louder as you kept your eye contact with him.
"Fuck baby," he grunted. "Not to bad for an old man, huh?" The way you moaned in response, mouth open in an 'O' shape as your eyes stayed locked to his told him he was correct. Your hands clawed your way down his chest, your eyes falling shut in your pleasure.
"Look at me," he demanded. You did as told, your big, lidded eyes filled with want nearing him towards his orgasm. All you could do was whine, whimper and moan, no hopes of formulating any real response. It was as if you were drunk on the way he felt inside you, pushing in deep and hitting all the right places.
"Are you gonna cum again for me baby? Let me feel you clench around my cock?" All his words did was make you moan louder, as if that were even still possible. You had never felt this level of pleasure before, and you knew you were going to be addicted. One of his hands made its way to one of your nipples, pinching it and rolling it between his thumb and forefinger. You felt your tummy flutter, clenching as you reached your second orgasm.
Your vision filled with stars, nearly screaming as you reached your peak again. Your walls clenched around Logan's cock, prolonging your orgasm as he continued to pound it in and out of your cunt.
You felt his thrusts begin to falter, grunting and growling as his movements became even harder and deeper than before. He suddenly pulled out, making you miss that feeling of fullness as he jerked himself off with his hand, spilling his cum onto your stomach and breasts.
As you both began to relax again, he couldn't take his eyes off you. The way his seed looked across your body, your flushed face and the way your breasts moved as you huffed breathlessly.
"Take a picture," you joked, "it'll last longer."
"Can I?" He replied cockily, breathless himself as he cocked an eyebrow making you giggle.
After helping you clean yourself up, Logan laid down next to you with a deep huff, pulling the blanket over the both of you.
"We've got to start doing that more often," you whispered. His arm opened for you, letting you snuggle into his chest sleepily as he wrapped his arm around you. He placed a soft kiss to the crown of your head.
"Oh baby," he chuckled softly, "after all that, I don't think I ever want to stop."
You drifted off to sleep, feeling protected under Logan's grasp, happy you had decided to take that walk.
2K notes Ā· View notes
astonmartinii Ā· 4 months ago
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imgonnagetyouback [guilty as sin part four] | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem sainz!reader
PR jail did a lot of damage, but unlike SOMEONE else, charles is ready for the apology tour
MASTERLIST | GUILTY AS SIN MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
note: the timeline is absolutely all over the place in this and for needs must pretend that the spanish and austrian races are swapped on the calendar!
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 1,045,389 others
yourusername: i think your house is haunted, why are they always mad?
view all comments
user239: i have had it with little miss poet over here TELL ME IF MY PARENTS ARE DIVORCED OR NOT
user240: i hate that as this generation, them following each other on instagram is a key feature to whether they're still together or not
user241: my grandparents didn't have to go through this šŸ˜­
maxverstappen1: spill it sis
user242: WHAT DO YOU KNOW MAX
maxverstappen1: ummm nothing, and if i did i only take cash bribes. this is baby max relating hard to the caption
user242: oh :(
yourusername: oh maxy .... at least we now have good ways to express our emotions!
user243: ma'am he tore lando's wheel off because he can't handle wheel to wheel racing
liked by landonorris
yourusername: it's called hard racing, maybe mclaren should watch some of senna's old races instead of doing their 100th tribute livery xx
landonorris: you know he said you would do this exact thing, you can't handle anyone linked to your brother doing well
yourusername: oh i was perfectly prepared for you to win every race after miami since it was clear that the mclaren is the fastest car on the grid EVEN THOUGH you've publicly sided with them when anyone with a moral backbone (and a hint of PR awareness) would've run for the hills
landonorris: i'd really worry about the fact that the one piece of relevance you had left is no where to be seen, you're not worth defending for him
yourusername: it's insane the way you all have the same pompous attitude about this (i know that's a big word, but maybe you guys could get a couple of quid together to buy a dictionary)
maxverstappen1: also don't try and pretend 1. that you're completely in the right about everything that happened in austria 2. that you weren't scrounging around me (when we were friends i guess) trying to get details on y/n and charles
user244: okay this is wild
user245: i really thought lando would see the light on this
user246: or he realised that he can't race wheel to wheel unless he has the power of carlando friendship so he's burning bridges
oscarpiastri: i miss leo
yourusername: we literally are down the street bozo
oscarpiastri: i am ON MY WAY
user247: she's in monaco ???
user248: has to be, oscar only has a rental place he stays in london for mclaren and y/n has only ever lived in madrid or monaco
user249: there is still hope everyone
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charles_leclerc
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 2,309,677 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: was i out of line? did i say something way too honest?
there are a couple things i need to get off of my chest.
first, a massive apology to my girlfriend. y/n is the love of my life and will be my wife sooner or later and i hate that as a 26-year-old grown man i haven't had the backbone to stand up to ferrari when it comes to her. she's incredibly strong and i hate that she's had to go through this without my public support. i can't take it back now, but if i could i never would've let them take my phone and take control of my social media. they have now been dealt with and no one will stop me declaring my love and support for her.
second, if i hadn't already ran out of patience before, the legal trouble that family have put their own blood through threw me over the edge. they will never, ever deserve that girl and if i have anything to do with it they will never talk to her ever again. i may have been silent online but money talks and we will have vindication soon.
third, a big thank you to max, oscar and ollie for their continued support of y/n. it means so much that the public still saw how loved she is when i couldn't.
four, i am awake and i am angry, these people will learn who they are fucking with. see you soon lecfosi, it'll all be worth it in the end.
view all comments
user254: WAR IS OVER
user255: my heart dropped when i got the post notification but this is the best news possible
user256: am i going to excuse a 26-year-old man for being a pussy? no. but i am going to celebrate him seeing the light and y/n having him back in her corner
yourusername: he was never out of my corner. true there was no public support, but he was there. i would rather have his support behind closed doors where it matters than plastered all over social media
maxverstappen1: you wouldn't believe the lengths these two were going, i became a messenger pigeon when they physically took his phone and the letters were so grossly cute
yourusername: that's literally mail tampering
maxverstappen1: and i'm a human not a pigeon, we can't all get what we want
charles_leclerc: i did i got y/n šŸ˜šŸ˜šŸ˜
maxverstappen1: ugh welcome back gross instagram comments
user257: so that's what max meant when someone referenced letters that's so cuteeeee
user258: the shout out to max and the extended leclerc family i know that's right
oscarpiastri: anything for my grid mum
olliebearman: actually charles can you get your phone taken away again cause the heist was VERY fun
yourusername: heist???????
charles_leclerc: don't answer that ollie
yourusername: answer it ollie, did you put yourself in harms way ???
charles_leclerc: it was hardly high-stakes
olliebearman: we only stole a phone from silvia's office
yourusername: ollie that's kind of slay but i'm going to need you to delete all of these incriminating comments i don't want you to get in trouble for charles
user259: i know this is just eating up carlos inside seeing how loved she is in his sport
user260: it really does seem that lando is the only one in his corner
sebastianvettel: i am proud of you charles, i know how much ferrari means to you, but never let them take you from those who matter
charles_leclerc: thank you seb, i couldn't have done it without you
yourusername: we love you seb
sebastianvettel: my impromptu not at all prompted trip to maranello definitely wasn't to give you a well-earned slap up the side of the head
user261: no carlos bitching it up in the comments... i've been dreaming of this
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maxverstappen1
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liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 1,734,037 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & yourusername
maxverstappen1: back to being a third-wheel, balance is restored - the united front of hating is BACK BABY
view all comments
user263: i prayed for times like this
user264: i know they didn't break up but i'm so glad y/n and charles are back together they're too pretty not to be in our faces 24/7
yourusername: just paying you back for you and kelly let me crash on the sofa
maxverstappen1: that really wasn't the burden you thought it was, jimmy and sassy loved their interactive cat bed
yourusername: i miss them (don't tell leo)
charles_leclerc: HOW DARE YOU MUM :((((((((
yourusername: okay baby we're not going to do that ...
charles_leclerc: but :( his feelings are hurt
yourusername: i know lewis is cool and will be your new teammate, but i draw the line at pretending to be leo in the instagram comment section
roscoelovescoco: watch urs backs
yourusername: AHAHAHHAHAHA
maxverstappen1: this man is about to turn 40
lewishamilton: you people ever heard of having some whimsy in your life
yourusername: i got sued by my own family šŸ‘
lewishamilton: um yeah, sorry that happened to you
user265: y/n be ticking up the amount of drivers she's gone toe to toe with in instagram comments
charles_leclerc: you can finally eat my ice cream without trying to hide it
maxverstappen1: i think it's against my partnership contracts to publicly say that i like that ice cream
yourusername: don't worry baby we both ate three tubs and cried watching chick flicks while you were locked away in maranello
charles_leclerc: there's a reason a special edition strawberry flavour made its way to you
yourusername: i love you :(
carlossainz55: you might be "united" but you haven't won yet
charles_leclerc: do you ever shut the fuck up?
carlossainz55: oh someone finally found their voice
charles_leclerc: yeah i did which means you don't get to control the narrative anymore and i can call you a bitch
maxverstappen1: also if there was anyway we would lose, at least we are united, i can count how many friends you have left in this sport on one hand and two of them are your dad and your cousin
charles_leclerc: and watch out, clearly you guys aren't afraid to betray family, who knows it could be you next?
user266: i think charles is still being restrained but can we please at least get one day when he can fully go off his rocker
user267: i think we deserve it after all of it
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,764,094 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: she's not only poet barbie but also lawyer barbie - THAT POETRY IS MINE BITCH, SUCK MY DICK AND RUN ME MY MONEY
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user268: i don't think i've ever been more happy for a stranger before in my life
user269: she deserves this so much i'm actually like over the moon
charles_leclerc: i'm so happy for you baby, i knew it would all be worth it in the end
yourusername: they can't stop my romantic ramblings now
charles_leclerc: i don't know if i want them to hear them all
yourusername: oh no some are for our ears only ;)
oscarpiastri: unfortunately it's NOT all just for your ears
olliebearman: for a millionaire i thought you'd at least buy a house with thick walls
maxverstappen1: you'll get used to it after a while
yourusername: THERE WAS CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION ARE YOU GUYS NOT HAPPY FOR ME ???
oscarpiastri: clearly not THAT happy
charles_leclerc: good. that would be entirely inappropriate
user270: finally some normal fucking couple stuff for y/n and charles
user271: their dynamic is so cute going from poetry to FUCKING
user272: i would be the exact same if i looked like either of them
fernandoalo_oficial: spoken like a real poet, i'm happy for you niƱa
yourusername: thank you pops !! couldn't have done it without you <3
fernandoalo_oficial: dealing with charles having close to a nervous breakdown every weekend was a lot, but i'm glad you have each other
charles_leclerc: thank you nando :)))) (i didn't have a nervous breakdown)
fernandoalo_oficial: you stress ate seven punnets of grapes
charles_leclerc: FERRARI I SWEAR I DIDN'T
charles_leclerc: wait i'm still annoyed at you ignore that
user273: i think charles is the first case of stockholm syndrome to a sports team
yourusername: @carlossainz55 come on i wanna tussle stop being a pussy
carlossainz55: enjoy your victory lap while you can, it won't last for long
yourusername: suck my actual dick, you put me through this i won't let you run away from it
yourusername: massive tip because i'm feeling generous, maybe actually come to court because there's a lot that you could know ...
carlossainz55: why would i waste my time on you?
yourusername: all will reveal itself
user274: oh it's finally on the other foot .... i'm enjoying this
user275: i think y/n and charles are too
f1tea
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liked by user276, user277 and 21,056 others
tagged: carlossainz55
f1tea: sources close to us say that there is serious worry in the sainz camp after the courts decided they were unlawful in their actions against y/n sainz. the financial standings of the sainz family were already somewhat dyer before they took the youngest sainz' income but it's said to be even worse now they've had to pay damages.
in terms of f1, several of the teams that were interested in sainz were put off by the way he and his family were treating his sister but have fully backed out now the financial struggles of the sainzs has become clear.
this comes after a number of sponsors have ended their partnerships with the spaniard. where do you think he'll end up?
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user278: at the job centre hopefully
user279: i think this is what the kids call poetic justice
user280: the way charles just picked up a new sponsor... we love to see it!
user281: all the sponsors flocking to charles is so fucking real
user282: life comes at you so fucking fast
user283: in the words of his hero: KARMA!
user284: especially since fernando congratulated y/n on her win in court šŸ˜­
user285: bro can't even afford the tractor seat at williams i am HOWLING
user286: or at sauber, boy oh boy this is some great great content for a hater like me
user287: or HAAS and they fucking took nikita mazepin
user288: the next race can't come fast enough i wanna see how this guy spins it in the media
user289: for once in his life i can't see him spinning this is any way that makes him look good
user290: god i hope y/n is in the paddock as well
user291: oh gosh i need her diana revenge dress moment
user292: i don't care if that's your brother i need you to STUNT ON HIM
user293: other than y/n and charles, i know oscar is cheering at this news
user294: bro saw his grid parents get back together and his biggest opp be declared broke and jobless
user295: i really don't understand how y/n slutting round the paddock has been praised so much when her hopping from driver to driver has cost her brother his dream
user296: cope.
user297: also y/n has only ever been with charles DESPITE carlos and her father trying to pimp her out for favours
usr298: now we know this ^^ i don't understand why carlos was so annoyed that she was finally doing what they always wanted
user299: it was because it didn't serve him.
user300: he was probably happy y/n was with charles until he realised it was for you know an ACTUAL relationship rather than psychological teammate warfare
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carlossainz55
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liked by landonorris, marcmarquez93 and 104,889 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
carlossainz55: it was never 'true love' if all you ever wanted was to bag a trophy husband and never work again
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user302: posting a picture of charles' crash and tagging him is nasty business
user303: would've been iconic if i wasn't him
user304: also that caption just really isn't the read he thought it was
user305: i grew up watching posh spice and cheryl cole in the stands at england games like obvs people want to be with athletes
user306: also this guy pretending he doesn't have a revolving door of models who are just there to be wags
yourusername: yes? and.
yourusername: at least wag isn't my only job. you better hope that rebecca stays booked honey
carlossainz55: don't bring rebecca into this she has nothing to do with any of this
yourusername: awwww did you already cheat? that does track...
yourusername: also you've been slandering my boyfriend all over the internet and ON THIS POST so shut the fuck up i'll bring up who i want to bring up
carlossainz55: get the fighting words out, you might need them when charles questions why you just happened to fall into his lap
yourusername: you've stolen every last penny from me, sued me and tried to turn everyone i care about against me - and guess what? YOU'RE STILL STUPID
carlossainz55: i'm not stupid you're a gold digging slut and you WILL BE FOUND OUT
yourusername: i actually think i could play pinball with the one remaining brain cell in your head
user307: i know this is serious drama but YES SASSY Y/N IS UNLEASHED FROM HER LAWYER'S GRASPS
user308: someone TAP CHARLES IN
user309: please you're out of the ferrari jail NOW IS THE TIME
charles_leclerc: you think i'm going to be offended that the most beautiful girl in the world has always wanted to be with me?
yourusername: what if i told you i'm a mastermind?
charles_leclerc: i would say i'm impressed and FLATTERED
yourusername: and now you're mine :P
charles_leclerc: and i'm glad
charles_leclerc: and i am of the serious belief that even if you didn't seek me out, we would've found each other regardless
yourusername: you made me believe in soulmates
maxverstappen1: @carlossainz55 this post really didn't do what you thought it would lOL
oscarpiastri: bro is falling at every hurdle
carlossainz55: yeah, yeah fuck you two. i'll see you on the track
maxverstappen1: if you can get close enough :P
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,783,088 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & maxverstappen1
yourusername: siri play hoes mad
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user310: this girl is a bestselling poet and this is how she's captioning her instagram posts
user311: babe we're like months into a family war that has had whole ass court cases we don't need eloquent captions
oscarpiastri: where's that one tiktok audio
yourusername: that audio has gone platinum in our house, i think i've saved every edit with it and charles
charles_leclerc: they do slap every time
maxverstappen1: HOES MAD HOES MAD HOES MAD
yourusername: someone is enjoying this
maxverstappen1: i've been praying on these people's downfall since i was 17 i've got a fancy bottle of wine i've been waiting to open
yourusername: we've really been through the wars with these people
charles_leclerc: and ME
maxverstappen1: well here's to them being BROKE AS FUCK LOL
yourusername: cheers!
charles_leclerc: šŸ„‚
user312: this has been some kind of crazy turn around
user313: considering we all thought they had broken up not long ago we have come SO far
charles_leclerc: i'd have the whole world mad at me if it kept you by my side
yourusername: i love you so much
user314: tbf i'd say a good 80% of people were mad at you when you were being ferrari's bitch
charles_leclerc: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY I'M SORRY
sebastianvettel: if it's any consolation, he was very torn up about it
yourusername: i know what happened charles, don't worry. i know you're dedicated to your craft and have people you want to win for
charles_leclerc: but i'm also dedicated to you
yourusername: we're in it together, forever now
yourusername: although this does mean ferrari have to deal with me now
user314: ugh they're so precious
carlossainz55: i'll have the last laugh don't you worry. you may have won the battle but you have not won the war.
user315: does this guy ever Shut the FUCK UP
user316: i'm bored. can't you just let them be happy
carlossainz55: no.
fin.
note: I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG but here she is, can't tell whether i love it or hate it - probably because i've been looking at it so long xx i guess p5 will be out hopefully some time soon and i hope my tagging works
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