#But I cannot cull them
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kirara :3
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#fanart#kirara hoshi#digital#culling games cannot come fast enough I Must see them#I enjoy the Iime green but it also reminds me of glee…….
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going quirkless for this but i knew a troll who was culled. it was a public execution right in my hivestem's lobby -- i saw her die painfully. the VERY NEXT NIGHT she was knocking on my hive and trying to make plans with me. i looked through the ganderbulb port -- it was definitely the same troll, and she very clearly wasnt dead. she wasnt even injured.
i freaked the fuck out and stayed quiet until she went away. ive seen her since and shes fine. if my neighbors werent freaked out too id think i was going shithive maggots.
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#aNON WHaT THE HELL??#i cAnnot imAgine seein A whole Ass resUrrected troll And not investigAtin fUrther At leAst A little#i think itd drive me insAne#i meAn i hAve heArd of identicAl trolls bein born from the sAme egg?? thoUgh its rAre As fAr As i know#mAybe one of them hAted the other And they reported her for somethin thAtd get her cUlled so they coUld tAke her identity??#its the only thing i cAn think of to explAin it#sAve for her literAlly bein resUrrected#either wAy i reAlly wAnnA know#unreality#screenreader friendly
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torn between making ve-corpsis an isolated island (potential fun to be had with island syndrome and the way that would effect the wildlife in terms of less biodiversity+island gigantism/dwarfism) or making it a massive rainforest (humidity would better suit the drakes and theres a lot to be done with the Massive amounts of biodiversity+the idea of drakes having to compete w that). coughs
#the great failing of dronic society is pride. the moment they run into vennettes+humans they start claiming superiority due to their--#--seeming relation to thule and expend a TON of energy + resources in order to project a facade of complete power despite--#--the absolute shitfest of their internal politics (entirely new species created by thule themself appearing the day they first make--#--nonviolent contact w the other sophants and the two time culling of their upper courts due to failed ascension attempts primarily)--#--and that kind of falls in line with the idea that ve-corpsis is not a very dangerous place for them a la the isolated island. them--#--having no Real predators throughout the course of their evolution (both biological + societal) and thus freaking the hell out the instant#--True competition comes into the picture. but on the other hand the super biodiverse rainforest gives them a different--#--angle of them having faced + still facing adversity on the home front that exaggerates their response to perceived outside--#--threats. would also open up potential for more drake subspecies filling in different ecological niches as opposed to the 3 main ones--#--ive got thought out for the isolated island#they are both pretty heavy handed metaphors i think its just which one i want to go for LOL the first is more in line with other--#--alamanni stuff going on like the frontierists and ayala but the second gives them a more 'sympathetic' angle (cannot think--#--of the exact word for that. you arent meant to sympathize w them but it humanizes them ? maybe that)
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holy shit everyone keeps coming onto my they/them druid w huge tits!! Leave me alone I'm saving myself for halsin !!
#gave them a new camp outfit and i cannot stop looking at their rack#i got wylls dance scene at the same time and i know he wasnt strong enough to not check their rack out when they bent over#i know i wasnt#alex speaks#astarion did it first. then gale. then karlach. then shadowheart (i think?). and now wyll#no favvy lae'zel this time cos theres too many characters in this game so i cull the herd so to speak
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The heartbreaking thing about a lot of viewers who haven't consumed the books is they don't completely see is WHY Lestat is near sobbing when he asks "Did you hurt yourself?"
Yes, for general reasons like he loves him and what not. But, don't forget, he also said, "I gave you to Armand. You tell me if that is saving."
In TVL, you get ALOT more of the Lestat/Nicky relationship. You see them bond, fall in love, and then Lestat have to contend with that love once he's kidnapped and turned.
Nicky does not take the vampirism very well. Nicky is a very desolate sort of character. Religious trauma to the max, and then throw in family trauma, gay repression, and then vampirism.
When Lestat leaves Paris with Gabrielle in TVL, he essentially leaves Nicky with Armand. He entrusts him into his care in a way, and Nicky chooses the fire. He can't endure as they call it. Naturally, it breaks Lestat's heart.
One of Armand's jobs as coven leader was to cull weak vampires who can't survive on their own or endure. So there is definitely room for S3 for them to show Armand pushing for Nicky to accept the flame.
With Louis, Lestat doesn't fight back in Paris and lets Louis go with Armand. Once again, he's entrusting someone he loves to Armand. Even if it's very much unwilling, but I'll give it to him for once for respecting a choice.
When Armand calls out to him in San Francisco, it's Lestat's worst nightmare. Louis is hurt, Lestat can't get to him. Armand either has allowed him to be hurt, hurt him himself, or did not protect him as Lestat wants him protected.
It is heavily implied Lestat thinks Louis died in San Francisco. In the books, Armand tells both of them the other died to keep them apart. Once again, the person Lestat loves is dead because of Armand.
Lestat, in his mind, has ultimately failed Louis, and so he falls apart as we see him do in 2x08. When Louis shows up, he cannot believe he's there initially. It's very clear he's only half there mentally. He has to ask him if it was all real and if he'd really been hurt because he has to know if it is really Louis. It's a question you'd ask the ghost of the person you love, but Louis CAN answer him.
Needless to say, please read the books if you're up for it. They are a riot.
#I am not a Lestat apologist#but I love nuance#lestat de lioncourt#interview with the vampire#loustat#lestat x louis#iwtv lestat#iwtv louis#lestat#dreamstat#louis de pointe du lac#amc iwtv#iwtv season 2#iwtv spoilers#the vampire lestat#tvlbook#Armand#armand x louis#musings#post s2 thoughts
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i have an odd animal husbandry question you seem like you might know the answer to, your comment about stan reminded me - ive been thinking about getting into backyard chickens for a couple years and the thing that makes me hesitate most is hard culling. im confident in my ability to put down an animal thats sick, or infirm, or for food, but for like, temperament? or for poor egg layers? just sticks on me for some reason. i think it would feel like telling them theyre not a good enough chicken for me. how to you process this part of animal husbandry?
This will be a little long, so bear with me.
If you want to keep use animals (animals bred for a purpose, to be used for a purpose instead of kept as a companion), you gotta get good with the idea that they are here for you under the agreement that you will only keep them as long as you need to. When you take them on, you are agreeing that you will release them to whatever their next life holds for them as soon as you do not need (or they've completed) their service. Maybe for some people that's just release to the biological cycle of life, for others maybe there's an eternal rest, for others maybe it's reincarnation. For soft culling that's just moving to the next household. Whatever it is, you are allowing them to pass to it in as humane a way as you can, and ultimately it is the single greatest kindness and gratitude you can show to them, to give them proper care while they are here and allow them to end with little to no pain- something animals outside of our care rarely get. You are thanking them for their service, and letting them go. Worth does not even begin to factor into it.
It is not easy to take a life. It is NEVER easy, regardless of reason, regardless of excuse, regardless of anything. It is ALWAYS heavy, and it will always hurt you. And it should. I am grateful for the weight of taking a life, because it reminds me that it is serious, and reminds me to take the production of life seriously, because at some point any life I cause to come into existence via breeding animals will have to end.
On top of that, some things ARE heath related that do not seem health related. Aggression in domestic animals IS A HEALTH ISSUE. A cock is aggressive because he is stressed about intruders, containment, mating threats, resource guarding, etc. Even with the best of care this can be true, and unfortunately for you both, this means the animal is not suited for domestic keeping. The same goes for animals (in any stripe of use, but particularly private care) that display repetitive stress behaviors from normal, proper captive care (for example, mice that are food chewing are stressed and should be culled from lines where possible because they are not having a good time). You are doing them a disservice to keep them in a stressful situation you cannot change because of their biology. It has nothing to do with not being good enough for you, and everything to do with producing/keeping animals that do not experience that stress in captive care and releasing the rest from duty because they will not be okay in any captive care.
For some issues (poor egg laying, for example) you CAN pet-home culls instead of hard culling. It's harder to do, you will spend time finding people who just want pets that don't intend to breed or don't care, but it can be done. However!! Is the bird just slow at producing eggs because her genetics say that's how fast eggs get produced, or is she producing slowly because there's a health problem that isn't immediately evident? Is her ovary damaged, is her reproductive tract infected, does she have a disorder that prevents her from processing food correctly so she can't get what she needs to produce eggs as fast as normal? Are you setting the bird up for failure (and someone else for heartbreak/money troubles) sending them to a pet home? Is it something which could lead to pain/suffering down the road if she's allowed to continue? Hard to say without spending a lot of money. Are you willing to risk your reputation, if someone takes a surprise illness/genetic issue down the road badly ("Oh THAT breeder sold me a sick/unhealthy bird/bird with bad genetics"), and compromise your ability to find homes for healthy birds down the road?
You are okay with culling a bird for food- there's nothing that says you cannot eat the bad temperaments, the poor egg layers, the one with genetic issues, and so on. And if you can tell early enough that you, personally, can't make use of the meat, there are plenty of folks with other animals that would LOVE feed for those animals. Take yourself down to a local reptile expo, grab the business cards for a few people who have big snake babies (retics, burmese, anaconda, redtail boa, even BP) that say they'd be interested in taking culls, OR look up local bird of prey rescues in your area (or reptile rescues or big cat rescues if there are any) and ask if they'd be interested in culls. There is ALWAYS someone that can use what you can't/won't. You may have to jump through some hoops to donate to some kinds of rescues (health testing for example), but it's an option you can look into if you want to combat the feelings you're talking about.
As a last note- and I am saying this gently and holding your face in both hands: do not anthropomorphize animals in reality.
In YOUR eyes, you are culling them an illness or an injury or for food or for temperament or for poor quality or or or---- it does not matter to the animal why you are culling them. A death is a death, to them. They are here, and then a thing happens, and they are no longer. They do not understand life or death or afterlife or reincarnation or that they are here for a purpose or not a purpose or literally anything you as a human might impose upon them in your head. They live while they are alive, and then they are not. They do not "want to live" in the "avoid death" sense because they do not necessarily understand "death" as a future concept. Instincts that have worked well to preserve life have been encoded in their DNA to one degree or another, they can and do respond to avoid pain, but with little exception (like... maybe elephants and dolphins and a crows and a few others), it's unlikely that they understand the connection between doing those things and being alive/avoiding death.
So while TO YOU it may feel like telling the bird they are not good enough, and TO ME it feels like allowing the bird to move on in peace... the bird doesn't know either way, and honestly the reason hardly matters. It is alive in the present, and one way or another it will not be alive someday, and you are responsible for making sure that the one way under your control is so peaceful or quick that the bird hardly knows it is no longer alive. The bird doesn't care about (and cannot understand) the why of their death, any more than they understand their pain/stress and how it relates medical assistance; it's why animals often freak out, refuse meds, etc. They don't hate the vet or the car or the carrier or anything- they just simply don't understand human stuff and react according to instincts/what they do understand. If you treat an animal like the animal it IS rather than the person you imagine it to be, you will find yourself with a lot better relationship with them during life, and be able to frame their passing a bit better later on.
#it's not an odd question actually#it's not even the first time I've been asked questions like this#It's a topic a LOT of people will not face head on#or talk about in louder than a whisper#but death is arguably the most important part of animal husbandry to talk frankly and openly about#asks#animal death for ts#culling#hard culling#chickens
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YUTA WAS ALWAYS SELFISH
I was originally going to make this post the week the big twist with Yuta in Gojo's body happened, because of the massive subversion that it was. It was the kind of twist that made you question if everything you ever knew about the character was wrong. Namely, Yuta one of the most empathic sorcerers we see in the series - the character who seems to lack the selfishness of the other sorcerers that make up jujutsu society. The kid who fights with the literal power of love.
Was Yuta a monster to begin with and we just didn't see?
So ignore the clickbaity tagline, Yuta is one of my favorite characters I'm not going to start calling him a terrible person. Rather that Yuta is dismissed as a soft kid or a wifeguy, when he's actually more cunning and cutthroat than anyone gives him credit for.
If a sorcerer is nothing more than a con-artist, then if the talent for trickery he displayed in the Sukuna fight is anything to go by Yuta is a true sorcerer down to his bones. Yuta turning Gojo's body into a puppet seems like a massive twist, and almost out of character for Yuta who was so devoted to Gojo.
His earlier fight in the culling game even seemed to hint that Yuta was too soft and he didn't truly have the attitude to fight someone like Ryomen Sukuna who was the embodiment of a calamity.
These panels seemed like a prophecy that Yuta was doomed to fall short against Sukuna. That he could never live up to his title as the next Satoru Gojo, because unlike Gojo and Sukuna who can stand on the top alone Yuta clings to his loved ones.
Sukuna got to where he is by rejecting love. Sukuna is Sukuna because he's never needed anyone to satisfy him. So how can Yuta who needs to be surrounded by his loved ones at all time to validate him and tell him it's okay for him to be alive even compete?
However, even in JJK zero Yuta's love is questioned on whether or not it's as selfless and "pure" as it seems. To begin with, Maki calls him out early on for attracting bullies by playing the victim a lot. He pretends to be a good and innocent person put upon by his circumstances and bullies when really he doesn't want to help himself. Instead of standing up to the bullies he's always let Rika protect him and then condemned her for being a monster. He's let Rika take the blame for all the destruction, even though Rika is HIS cursed technique, created by HIS emotions, and is protecting him.
Yuta doesn't make any attempt to try to learn to control Rika, or even work with her, he just shrivels away in fear.
"You act like a good person, but it feels fake..." Yuta has always adopted the facade of a good person. He seems soft, socially anxious and withdrawn, even after he gains confidence as a sorcerer those traits don't go away because they're a part of his outward persona. Jung divides the psyche into two parts, the persona a mask that faces the world the parts of yourself that come out in your social interaction with people and then there's the shadow your repressed personality.
Yuta's shadow is a literal monster that declares her love for him and then expresses that love by violently destroying everything around him.
Yes, Rika initially contained the soul of someone else but Rika the curse was created by his technique, her power corresponds to his emotions, she comes from his shadow, and even after the real Rika passes on the Shikigami RIKA still remains completely under Yuta's control. Rika is Yuta, the embodiment of his twisted definition of love that would curse his loved ones to keep them by his side forever because he can't live without them. All of Rika's insane possessiveness? That's Yuta's too. Rika's violent overprotectiveness? That's Yuta.
How poetic is it really that Yuta and Rika are so codependent that Yuta's shadow, the other half of his personality is literally RIKA. Yuta cannot exist without love, and without someone too love, he's so terrified of being alone that he cursed Rika and then turned her corpse into a puppet after death. He uses his loved one as a weapon to fight his enemies.
If you think about it for more than five minutes Yuta's cursed technique and Rika has some seriously messed up implications, but it's hard too because as messed up as Yuta's love is it's still genuine.
Love is a curse, but in 236 Nanami speculates that sometimes curses can save people too, just like how Jujutsu Sorcerers use curses to fight and protect others.
So Yuta's love is a screaming, raging, overprotective monster, but it's also what give shim the motivation to fight ofr others. Yuta's love is a curse, but curses can save people too.
Yuta on the other hand isn't aware of his own darker nature most of the time.
The big twist in Jujutsu kaisen Zero is that just as Maki accused him of from the beginning, Yuta was playing the victim all along. He acted like Rika cursed him with her dying breath, but Yuta was the one who cursed her because he couldn't bear to live without her.
However, even this apology is a bit telling of Yuta's self-centered nature. He immediately turns everything into his fault and starts beating himself up over it. He doesn't look at anyone else's perspectives or that other people had a role to play. He deliberately ignores Rika's feelings on the past few years, which Rika is quick to point out for him.
This scene has a parallel later where Yuta ultimately, only thinks about himself first and foremost. In spite of wanting so badly to be surrounded by his loved ones, it's more about him loving them, and less about their feelings for him.
After all he's completely willing to commit a double suicide with Rika to protect his friends, ignoring the fact Rika doesn't want him to pass on just yet, and Maki, Inumaki and Panda wouldn't want him to disappear either. This scene has a direct parallel a year later in the fight against Sukuna when Yuta gives up his body.
Maki almost breaks character from her usual culling game arcs stoicity to fight and argue with Yuta to stop him form doing this, and Rika who one year earlier told Yuta to live a long life so she wouldn't have to see him on the other side so soon is reduced to screaming and sobbing while holding his dead body.
Yuta loves people, or at least he feels an intense amount of love for people, but he can be as self-centered as the other sorcerers we see in the story. Geto even points this out right away, that Yuta is selfish, that he's seeking self-affirmation first and foremost. He needs other people's approval, their love, to feel like he deserves to exist. He'll do anything to earn that love, and once he has it he'll do anything to protect it but it's ultimately for himself.
It manifests in Yuta's technique itself copy, which first and foremost requires Yuta to consume parts of his loved ones that can never be healed if he wants to keep their copied technique. Yuta gets stronger by literally eating his loved ones. We have canon confirmation that Yuta fed part of Inumaki's severed arm to Rika.
Yuta's cursed technique is to emulate the strengths of all of his loved ones copying them and making them a part of his oqn technique, because Yuta will take any shape and form in order to be loved. It's also the perfect technique for fighting as a part of a group, because someone like Sukuna will naturally assume that Yuta's technique STEALS instead of COPYING so he'll forget that the original still retains their technique.
Yuta's not only selfish and has a very selfish, overprotective love for others, but it's those exact qualities that make him an effective sorcerer strong in the area that Gojo is the weakest. Group coordination.
Gojo is in his element when he's alone, but Yuta is so codependent that he literally cannot exist unless other people are looking at him. His strength comes from the things he copies and takes from his friend, and he turned his loved one into a puppet to fight others. Is it really that surprising that this kid would willingly use Gojo's body as a weapon after death when that's literally what he did to Rika.
How telling is it that like Yuta learned that Rika was cursed by him, went so far to exorcise her spirit, and then after finally letting go after her spirit passed on he made a second Shikigami named Rika a few months later made out of the small remnants of cursed energy that Rika left behind as a gift after passing on. The dude is not over Rika, he's like, Geto and Gojo levels of not over Rika.
Yuta's cursed technique being the literal weaponization of his love and his loved ones makes him the best character for group coordination in the entire series. Yuta even adopts apsects of hakari's persona when making his plans against Sukuna since he decides to gamble at several key points in the plan.
Several of the key moments in the fight are all Yuta's plans, with some collaboration from Angel. He makes several bets too like Hakari would. The first being going to finish Kenjaku by himself and using both Todo and Takaba in conjunction to trick him. The second is the bet that he'd be able to make it back in time to rejoin the fight in case Higuruma's plan fail.
It was Yuta who let his own domain barrier down on purpose to let Sukuna think he had the victory so he would let his guard down and make it easy for Maki to ambush him. Something that also required perfect coordination between Yuta and Maki working in tandem with one another.
Yuta set up Hana to do one large jacob's ladder when Sukuna least expected it because he knew Sukuna would forget that his technique is COPY and not steal. He also made the biggest bluff which was leading Sukuna to believe that he fed Rika his last finger.
These aren't just good bluffs, they require near perfect coordination with your allies and taking several chances on them. Nobara might not have even woken up so the last finger / resonance Gambit was perhaps the biggest gamble. Maki and Yuta had to coordinate with each other well so Maki would be there when Yuta dropped the barrier. Yuta needed Takaba a relatively new and inexperienced sorcerer to survive against the threat that was Kenjaku, and he needed all of his allies to stay alive while he was prioritizing Kenjaku.
These are all plans Satoru Gojo would never have been able to pull off, because Gojo only ever relies on himself. If Yuta and Hakari had intervened in the Gojo and Sukuna fight then he would not have been able to go all out, whereas Yuta REQUIRES people collaborating with him in order TO GO ALL OUT.
This is Yuta. This is his strength. Yuta is nothing without love, so he takes on the forms of the people he loves and takes things from the people he loves in order to gain the power to protect him. Yuta copies everything from the people he loves, so is it really that much of a surprise that he'd become a monster just like Gojo.
In some ways, Geto and Yuuta were the same. Geto was too sincere. To someone like him, the reality that the world of sorcerers presented to him was just too cruel. ’…that in a world like this, I couldn’t be truly happy from the bottom of my heart.’ To live for the purpose of being yourself. And for that goal, Geto could only continue to pursue his twisted dream, drowning himself in the curse that lies in the gap between ideal and reality.
Love is a weapon for Yuta. Just like his curse technique can take any form, so does Yuta's love, and so does Yuta himself. Love always wins, and in order to do so Yuta will take any shape necessary, no matter how twisted.
Love is the worst curse of them all, and Yuta will become the worst monster of them all if it means protecting his love ones.
#jjk meta#yuta okkotsu#maki zenin#gojo satoru#yutamaki#rika#jujutsu kaisen meta#jujutsu kaisen theory
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Marine centre 4 - Merformers AU
Word count: 2k
Warnings: mention of reproduction
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Sorry this chapter too so long. But woo it's done now
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The ocean is rather calm as the marine team's boat sits out on the water. Only three people are currently on the boat running water samples while the other move around the reef. Among the coral's shimmering archways, Bluestreak weaves his way around and flicks his fins every now and then as the anxiety builds up in him, keeping a safe distance from the human, yet unable to tear his eyes away from their form gliding through the deep.
They wield strange devices to harvest the venomous terrors plaguing the reef. Bluestreak shudders as he watches them drive the sharp spear through another, to imagine their number of them that his favourite little softie had already harvested.
They continue to spear the Lionfish, shoving the dead ones into the container in their hand. Bubbles drift up from their scuba tank as they continue around the reef, paying little attention to the Oceanides stalking them around the reef even as they hear the melodic songs of them.
Bluestreak flits warily in the human's wake, fins twitching uneasily. He watches as they spear yet another "firefish," Joining him, Skywarp chitters confusedly. "Why do they insist on stalking the venomed beasts? Their spines could pierce their tough hides they wear"
Nearby, Smokescreen emits an amused burble. "More likely they're satisfying some peculiar breed of bloodlust. Soft-shelled as they are, perhaps watching others hunt is their way of proving they are a reliable mate." Observing the ease and care they take each time they dispatch another venomous fish. Onslaught slowly makes his way closer to watch alongside them. slowly forms a different hypothesis. "Listen - when the hunting is done, all the carcasses will be sealed in that floating can they drag. Their goal isn't to kill at all, but clearing the reef of them, they are dangerous fish?"
Skywarp clicks thoughtfully. "The fire-fishes have been devouring the small fish the pods rely on, and if they touch us it isn't fun, I remember my first time getting stuck by them. If the two-leggers cull them en masse..."
Bluestreak swims closer to the human, eyes still hyper focused on them in worry. It's only when the reef sharks begin emerging it makes the group go on guard, the sharks never hassle them, it was an unspoken instinct between the species. Sharks respected the Oceanides And vise versa but they were still weary when it came to their soft skin.
At the sharks' approach, unease ripples through Bluestreak's frame he cannot suppress a fin flare of warning at the aquatic creatures as they flank his favourite human. Joining him, Ironhide rumbles a deep threat as Smokescreen hovers close, The sharks are eager to steal the spread lionfish from the human darting off with the stolen goods.
Bluestreak flares his fins in an alarmed snarl as one bold shark snatches a speared lionfish right from the human's grasp. Rushing forward, he lets out an aggressive hiss at the opportunistic predator.
The other Oceanides rumble uneasily behind him, fins flared as Skywarp and Smokescreen ready themselves to fend off the shark if they became blood hungry. The scent of the fish did make many of the Mers hungry themself for said fish they knew better than to eat it, there were certain Fish they couldn't eat and Lionfish were one.
Still, seeing the human now empty-handed after the shark's theft made them sad, the human had claimed the prize fairly and the opertunical hunters stole it. The shark circles around, seeming to be looking for more and waiting for the human to spear another.
The human pays the little mind even rubs one of the slower sharks heads before moving on to find more of the invasive fish to spear. The pod watches in stunned silence as the human continues their work, calmly rubbing the snouts of inquisitive sharks that drift too close in search of handouts. Even Bluestreak is taken aback by the fearless ease with which they handle the predators.
When one overeager beast almost knocks the astray, they simply grasp its snout and spin the shark aside with surprising strength. Smokescreen cracks up at the startled look on its face as it circles away. Rodimus swims nearer, curiosity overriding past unease. "How does one so unarmored interact with them, im aware sharks aren't malicious, but even now they are more interested in the fish when they could easily rip them apart if they worked together."
Skywarp nudges the human gently, which earns a slight nudge back and a shake of their head. "Careful, small one “ But watching them return unbothered to the task at hand.
The human nearly yelps as a set of oceanside arms wrap around them, their head snaps to see the mer who is now tugging insistently towards the boat. "You must get out of the water now! The sharks have grown too bold - they may mistake you for prey if you linger among them."
The others crowd close, chirping with concern. Rodimus splashes sharply at another shark.
The human struggles fruitlessly against Bluestreak's strong grip. He lets out an anxious trill.
Skywarp and Smokescreen flank him as they basically pull the human up to the surface.
A puzzled look forms on the other humans faces as they basically dump their feeder back onto the boat before diving back into the water leaving the humans stunned. They scramble in alarm.
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"What was that!!" Dale yells one, rushing to help them sit up. "What happened, are you hurt?"
They waved him off, catching their breath with a rueful laugh. "I'm fine, fine - just had an underwater escort insisting I clear out posthaste. Seems the Oceanides decided the sharks were getting too bold for comfort today."
They peer back over the side of the boat at the cluster of curious merfolk treading water nearby. Angelfish chitters anxiously, fins flickering again. The group exchange thoughtful looks, having witnessed firsthand the merfolk's intelligence and family-like bonds with a human. Nathan shrugs. "Well, can't argue with the locals when they say the surf's getting a little lively for comfort. Guess it's time we wrapped up for today too."
“Hey Quin, when you have a second. Have a question for you, I know you know more about the Oceanides than most of us do.” they call out to the marine Scientist. while emptying the disposal container of lionfish. Quin turned at the sound of her name, pushing sweat-slicked hair from her eyes as she watched the Oceanides paddle slowly around the boat. "Have you noticed the decline in the oceanide pups?”
"Yes, I've definitely noticed concerning trends," she replied, expression furrowing with concern. "Pup counts and viability are way down across the board. Water quality is fine, and prey availability is high, not to mention we are out here often doing clean up, the ocean seems to not be the issue."
She dusted the dried salt from her hands as they began moving and rearranging equipment on the boat. Nathan speaks up next. "Have you observed any oddities in local fishery populations or kelp forests? Any algal blooms poisoning shellfish? The web is intricately complex - pull one thread, and the whole thing unravels." He calls back while testing another water sample for alkaline readings.
“nope, they seem weary of the Lionfish, but they don't tend to eat stuff outside their diet, plus the fish we also provide they aren't hungry.” they call back. A sigh escaped Quin's lips as gulls wheeled and cried overhead. "We may need to consider more active intervention strategies if declines continue, potentially captive breeding..." The doctor's expression showed her distaste for such options but willingness if needed.
The health of the oceanides was her life's passion. She would move heaven and earth to protect them. "I'm glad I'm not the only one who has noticed, but yea, I'm worried so far we only have three little Bumblebee, on our records as a surviving pup. I'm starting to get worried over them. I know you told me to not get too involved but after nursing that little pup for so long I'm just worried" they explain, most of them understand, watching what was an endangered species struggle always hit hard.
Quin nodded understandingly, resting a comforting hand on their shoulder. " There's no shame in wanting to help, that's what our job is," she assured them. Her gaze grew keen as she studied the ocean thoughtfully. "One pup surviving is indeed troubling. They lack genetic diversity and resilience in such small, fragmented groups."
Turning back to them, she continued. "Have you noticed any rivalries or attacks between pods? Food shortages driving abnormal aggression could further endanger the young."
"Big blue and the Meg had a scuffle but so far you have handled it. But most of the pods have been quiet. But other than that nothing else." They go quiet for a moment "I think you might have to take me off feeding them, i think I'm getting too attached to Bee, don't want him to think humans are safe god i don't think i could live with myself if something happened to him because he is to used to humans " they finally admit.
"I care for them alot, they are beautiful creatures, but... I don't want the pup to think I'm one of them. I know Bee was the first Oceanide pup to ever be in care to humans, fuck it feels almost unreal. I'm just glad we were able to save one of the pups" They exclaim while leaning back against the boat as Dale moves about. "That you and Quin were able to save even one pup is a miracle, don't sell yourself short." He calls out.
Quin smiled gently as she prepared samples for analysis. "I was just the one to organise the care plan you did all the work during those weeks. And i'm sure if Big blue Didnt want you near the baby it would be very clear"
The sound of whistles and thrills bounce off the water as movement under the waves catches their attention. It was the oceanides, Magic and Firefin checking to see what they were up to. "Looks like we have company" Nathan chuckles as two large Mers come into view followed by Angelfish and Smokey.
Quin's eyes lit up at the sight of the approaching pods. Even after years of study, the beauty and majesty of the oceanides never failed to awe her. "Looks like our work had an audience today," she chuckled.
As the oceanides circled with graceful movements, zipping playful figure eights around them, she turned a smiling sidelong glance. "See how they come to check our movements? Such intelligence, thriving without reliance on humans."
" they are so intelligent, have you seen how they talk to each other?" They ask. Quin chuckled knowingly. " I have, their communications are far more nuanced than we once presumed. Visual cues, echolocation, even tactile gestures, honestly they seem so human in aspects." She shook her head in amazed wonder.
"To think, once we saw them as little more than beasts. Now their societies, cultures, and deeply personal relations astound me constantly." More thrills and calls come as Angelfish who basically halls himself partially onto the boat. Eyes wide as he calls again at his favourite humn gills and fins flaring as he calls.
"Yes, yes hello Angelfish, no, no don't you crawl onto the boat" they tried to shoo the Oceanide off earning a laugh from. The others. "Someone's certainly taken a shine to you!" she noted with amusement. "He likely sees you as another of his pod after your care of the pup. What an honour" she hums in astonishment
As Angelfish places down a few select corals, shells and pebbles it has the others watching eagerly, enjoying the study of the interaction. "An exchange of gifts, is it?" she noted with a smile looking at the diver. “It seems those Oceanides are very taken with you, we might have to see how they continue to interact, it's the first time we have had such experiences between them and ourselves. They seem to trust and care for you” he informs.
______________
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#transformers#transformers idw#transformers x human#mtmte#transformers x reader#merformers#mermaid au#merman#mermaid
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all the places light does not touch
wednesday addams x gn!reader
summary: there are places in wednesday that the light doesn’t touch and she can’t help but to put you in all of them.
words: 4.2k
orange speaks: final part to the great war (part one | part two). damn, it's been a hot minute, huh? apologies for the wait, but i hope y'all will enjoy this last installment.
Gravesoil clings to Wednesday’s nail beds, a desperate plea scratching against her vocal cords that she will never admit to beyond this moment. You are mumbling to yourself, a language she’s never heard of slicing through the quiet; the mother tongue of the beast that lingers in places she cannot reach nor see. Wild, bloodshot eyes survey the empty space in front of you and veins crowd underneath your lashes. There’s a pause before you hunch over, hands reaching up to grasp tightly at your head and –
Wings ripple out of tearing flesh, blood soaking the floor underneath her former lover’s feet. An ominous, onyx liquid takes over the whites of your eyes, dripping slowly down the apple of your cheeks and leaving dark tear tracks in their wake that trail pass a shuddering throat.
How foolish she was to forget what lays dormant beneath your skin, waiting to unleash itself upon the world. Control was hard fought and just barely won after each battle, a traumatic fear for the possibility of a blood-curdling outcome hardening the usual soft color of your gaze.
Wednesday had always been there to placate the darker side of you but times were different now. The consequences of her wrongdoings were forming; in the shape of elongating teeth, in downy feathers expanding to three-times the length of your arm span, and in horns spiralling to reach the sky above them.
You were horrifyingly marvellous.
Gone is the fear from before, an innately evil force hunkering down to take its place. Tendrils of hellfire coat your skin in a blaze of heat that Wednesday can starkly feel, wraiths rising from the puddles of crimson ichor that is still shedding and staining ghoulish flesh. A sinister grin warps your features into a gruesome mosaic and she is wary of the scheming tug to your lips.
“Do you feel it?” You rasp, multiple layers of cadence making your voice echo and overlap into something otherworldly. Wednesday’s brows pinch, a frown of incomprehension downturning the corner of her lips. “The inevitable culling of this night, can you feel it?”
“Enough. You’re talking nonsense.” She sneers.
A shiver caresses the curve of her spine when you sigh solemnly in return, the ground trembling beneath your feet as you glide closer to her. Your left hand lifts and fingertips that resemble claws leave behind rivers of blood as you skim her jawline, thumb tucking into her jugular before the entirety of the extremity encloses around her throat.
The touch is light, there’s no weight in the action but Wednesday chokes all the same. A primal instinct of survival urges her to fight the hold because while running has never been in Wednesday’s repertoire, the need for bodily autonomy will always remain. Personal space is sacred when the world longs to claim and taint everything she’s ever come to own.
Nero; a first companion forcibly taken by the will of another.
Tyler; a first kiss lost to the lips of a monster.
You; a first something she’s afraid to name with an end she’s yet to come to terms with.
Each one is a death with its own cause and reaction but they all drive her further away into solitude, into a body built too big for her bones.
There’s a light within her that flickers and spiders which crawl from crevices dug into ivory calcium, seeking the warmth that it offers – it never lasts, they scurry with every faltering glow and Wednesday is left with the echo of an ancestor, of a destiny meant to be spent alone.
Be it by her hand or someone else’s, the truth of her fate lingers.
Still, the scraps from the before she seldom acknowledges; when words meant to burn were just measly thoughts to create distance and a twin heart still laid next to hers, where a sense of forever was yet to fade and hope, however gross the negligence of it was, was able to reach even the unlit corners of her, craves to forget – just for a moment – that this is who she has to be.
For everyone’s sake but most especially yours, Wednesday scatters those scraps until they exist in locations that are inaccessible, even to herself, and no one suffers more for it than she does. So, as she swallows back the bile of her desires, her tongue is sour with bitterness and syllables formulate an acrid speech that tries to chase away the taste of all that she wants but cannot have.
“All I detect is your feeble minded attempt to frighten me. You’re a bleeding heart, Tesoro, we both know you’re too soft to follow through with your meagre threats. You never were tenacious enough to do what was needed to keep me, this is no different.”
Regret is immediate; acid does not eliminate bitterness, it only serves to make the taste resonate deeper until she’s choking on the foul filth of an inescapable death. The true difference between you, she realizes, is that she’s not capable of being selfless without leaving scars on the ones she’s trying to shelter and that your way of being selfless only leaves you with more.
A thick smog of shadows gather in the atmosphere, sharpening your features and maniacal laughter washes over the cusps of Wednesday’s eardrums. Her pulse jumps and she just knows that you felt it because your grip on her throat tightens at last, unapologetic nails becoming a barbed wire necklace that itches to splay her tendons for the world to witness.
“Oh, Mulsa, that’s where you’re wrong.” You tsk with condescension. “Everything is different. I’m finally who I was always meant to be, existing outside of the fear that plagued me, and it’s all thanks to you. I have embraced my destiny, can you say the same?”
Mockery drips from your words and her reality suddenly shifts as she finds herself in a castle that assembles itself with a swish of your wrist. It reigns beautifully decrepit in nature; rotten beams of wood rib the frame, moss rests in divots of cracking stone, and moonlight glints through openings in the ceiling. You casually lean against a gothic throne of skulls that no one sits upon and Wednesday transforms into a court jester, in the presence of a lowly regent who pretends that they do not pull all of the strings behind the scenes.
“How long do you think you’ll last in this kingdom of solitude, Wednesday? Who else will you hurt in your quest for knowledge? And do the answers you find at the end of it all outweigh the expense others have to pay to get you there?” Your voice rumbles, ricocheting off stone walls before striking her exactly where you know it will hurt most.
Color touches her skin for the first time, anger and humiliation mingling to create a red sheen on pale flesh. It’s a sort of wickedness she never thought you to be capable of but perhaps she should have seen it coming.
“None of that is relevant.” She whispers harshly.
“Isn’t it? Am I not the cataclysm of your choices? Is this not me paying your dues?” Massive charcoal wings beat; once, twice, three times – they propel you upward, high into the air and tree bark horns tilt your jaw back with their weight. Specks of blood rain down from the force, painting the surrounding layout maroon, dousing Wednesday in turn. You bare your arms outward, showcasing your new form to an audience of one.
Crisp, off-white linen hugs the muscles of your torso while the sleeves furl at each elbow. Three buttons are undone, revealing a prominent collarbone and a smooth expanse of skin. Dark beige slacks loosely clutch to long legs – one slightly bent at the knee, toeing the edge of the other as you hover in place. You are all neutral tones with monochromatic undercurrents, eyes drowning in a void of black reeking of judgement, and vibrancy is lost to a death by her own hands.
Wednesday licks her lips, catching droplets of metallic liquid on her tongue. Stagnancy overrules the scent of trees in the foreground and there is no reprieve as she suffocates on nothing but the truth. Her resolve is crumbling; you may not be a ruler of this kingdom but you do have an undeniable deathgrip on her heartstrings. If you were anyone else, that fact would be revolting.
“Unless,” a pause. “Maybe this is what you wanted. You always did love everything dark and twisted.”
Slowly, you descend in front of her and there’s a soft click as the heels of your dress shoes settle down. Dust kicks up into the air, your wings breezing along the floor, and you wordlessly take four shallow strides around her. You come to stand behind her, breath fanning over the sensitive stretch of her neck. She can see you no longer but just your presence in itself is taunting.
There’s a brush of fingertips against her back, nudging her forward and before long she arrives at a set of steps. You shove her up them; the action makes her stumble and her balance is lost to the last stair. She falls into the vacant throne, which she now realizes belongs to her. Twin knees scrape the edge, making her body twist to relieve the pain and sit properly.
Indignation rises to the surface at the mistreatment and Wednesday tries to swallow it, to keep away words that will only perpetuate this discourse, but it’s fruitless. “My proclivities aren’t your concern. Up to this point, every decision you have made has been solely yours. I am not to blame for your indiscretions.”
“Perhaps.” You nod, standing resolutely at the incline up to the throne she sits upon. “Truly, I’m not here for placations or reasonings. You are partially correct in assuming that this,” your hand waves around your form, “is not the inner workings of your… machinations.”
“Then why? What is this macabre display for?” Wednesday interrupts.
None of it makes sense; how easily you forfeit your earlier claims.
“Because, in the end, this was never for you.” You start, something dark creeping along your legs. It rises to dwarf your already tall stature and features are slow to form but when they do, they are wholly monstrous and deeply unsettling. There is absolutely nothing in this world that compares and warning bells screech a dizzying spell of the danger to come should Wednesday choose to misstep in its presence.
Exaggerating steps loosen the hold it has on you, materializing into translucent flesh, and your body is distorted to her as the being stands in front of you. An arm raises, travelling up to your chest, and stuttering in wicked glee before plunging in. You gasp loudly, figure hunching over, and the being forces you straight with its free hand at your shoulder. With a dramatic flair, it rips its fingers out and they do not come back empty.
Without care or regard, the beast walks away from you, and the sight that greets Wednesday grips her with terror. The facade of power fades to nothing and you are left human but skeletal. Wings, horns, the black void; they’re all gone, and exhaustion coats your dull eyes, your knees buckling to the floor. Falling forward, your shoulders rise, head ducking low as nailbeds of blood trace the cracking stone of the floor. Convulsions attack your spine, driving a body of bones further into the ground.
“A distraction,” The beast rumbles in glee, an olden accent curling over its words. “To pull you away from the truth.” A bleeding, bruising heart rests in its palm; dark blotches covering the organ and Wednesday finds it disconcerting the way they pulsate, widening with each heavy breath you shudder. “We finally understand now; love is a weakness. For children who still play with toy soldiers, dreaming of the day they will change the world. It’s quite humorous, don’t you think?”
And there, right then, despite your best efforts to play it off as something else, Wednesday finally sees the evil for what it truly is: self-preservation. It is protection, disguising itself as rage. It is guardianship, shouldering all that you cannot and turning it into power. It is the heart in a beast’s hand, with a cage that moulds along its edges that wills itself not to break any further.
Red teeth gleam up at her, a grotesque smile staring straight through her, and dissuading her attention from the creature next to you. “I never wanted to change the world, Wednesday, not really anyway. But I did want you – not just the good parts but also the pieces of you that raged in contempt. I wanted the entirety of you: your doubt, your fear, your selfishness; the thousand-yard stare, the tempered soul, the frostbitten heart. I wanted the girl who despised even the thought of love.”
“No.” Wednesday utters except it’s too quiet, caught in her throat.
“God, Wednesday, I wanted it all – everything you were willing to part with and nothing more. Yet, you turned your back on us and you didn't even have the decency to give me a valid reason why. I deserved better than a half-assed excuse as to why it had to end. But it’s okay. Blame is a two-way street and I was wrong too. I pushed and ignored every warning sign, dancing along boundaries and fed into your suspicions without a need to prove myself to be on your side.”
“No.” She tries again.
(Still not enough, still on the cusp of- of-.)
“And I guess, this is all to say that we both had a choice and perhaps we chose wrong, though maybe the cards were always stacked against us. Now here we are, forcing each other to relieve it all over again, and it’s time to put an end to this. We finally get to have what we tried to cheat each other out of. You finally get to be free and I finally get to say goodb-.”
“No!” The single word rips and tears and mutilates her throat in the effort to leave the confines of her voice box. All her life Wednesday has been toeing the line between devastation and freedom, a weak grip on her inhibitions, always viscerally trying to prove something or another. Until a sick sense of clarity washes over what this all means; one more loss, one more all alone, one final nail in the coffin.
A death to rewrite all the others.
Falling in love with you was like falling asleep, gradually then all at once, because it crept along the edges of her vision until it was too late and despite her aversion to it, it was warm. And the days that followed were everything she thought herself to be incapable of; the quiet nights, the sound of rustling sheets as she wrote pages upon pages on her typewriter, the dulcet tones of you humming along to vibrating strings, the laughter without reservation, the eyes full of a home made just for her, the hands that held her softly in the dark.
And then, of course, the self-sabotage set in. Her wants and desires took a backseat to make room for fear, and somewhere in the midst, the ease of your love made way for her doubt and she swears you both lost something that day. The person she became to combat her loss of control isn’t something she’s proud of but maybe… maybe this is the part where she pleads with you to understand. Where she lays everything on the line; all her misgivings and the lies she tries to tell herself to circumvent all that she does not understand.
When your eyes cut across her own, you look at her like you know, and the uncaged beast only laughs as your features close themselves off from her once more. The vulnerability seeps out, draining from trembling, bloodsoaked fingers, and replacing itself with indifference before Wednesday even has the chance to rearrange her thoughts into coherency. The pleas building in her throat die, falling into the void of every other thing she’s left unsaid.
How repulsive.
Wednesday’s jaw clenches at her own inadequacy, teeth clicking in time with her shallow breaths. Hands of ice grasp tightly at each other while she tries to reform the truth she’s been meaning to say. It’s time, she attempts to coax herself. No longer will she bow to her lesser qualms.
Enough is enough.
“You were wrong.”
A feigned grace pulls her from the throne, rising up and carrying her down the steps that will lead her to you. Firm resolve weights each footfall to the stone beneath Wednesday, laying the groundwork for an outcome that doesn’t end with ties severed indefinitely. A disgusting amount of trepidation still lingers menacingly, but not for prior reasons. It washes over her because she knows that if she doesn't get this right and you walk away from her once again, it will be for the last time.
As she reaches you, the beast rears up into the space between you, your heart ducking out of sight with a single movement. Up close, Wednesday can see the second the previous glee renders itself obsolete, paving the way for rage to form in its stead. Translucence melds into mortal flesh in an instant, further providing a barrier to you and it’s features constantly flicker; sweeping into each other, refusing to commit to a lone one.
All of it is a warning: for you may have never been able to truly hurt her, but this beast holds no such inhibitions. And yet, Wednesday ignores it, skirting around the form with a brief flicker of eye contact. Rolling coals follow the movement, a sneer deepening the gouges at the corners of it’s mouth. Heat steadily rises at her back when she kneels before you, gaining in temperature, and a hearth set ablaze licks the skin of Wednesday’s nape, until sweat lines her hairline.
“Before,” Wednesdays continues despite the duality of the cold shell holding your gaze captive and the heat at her back, her fingertips fluttering around your body but never settling. “You said you’d never be good enough for me.” A scowl crawls into her features, disdain vaguely clinging to her words. “You were wrong.”
Confusion briefly overcomes the frost but it’s not enough. You flinch with every syllable, as if her words still burn; like your flesh is a step away from igniting and she’s dousing you in lighter fluid. A battlefield sprawls before her, all of her own making, and each word is a precarious mark upon the earth, hidden with landmines Wednesday tries to sidestep.
Wednesday thinks this might be part of her destiny that Goody forgot to mention – truth be told, self-loathing is akin to starvation; the hunger pains force you to eat yourself from the inside out until nothing remains. Perhaps that’s the most tragic intricacy of her fate, to commit atrocities for the sake of others' preservation, and to suffer all the more for it. Now, trying to find the medium between the two banks entirely on her willingness to push aside everything she’s ever thought to know about herself.
As Wednesday gazes upon you; you with the sunrise in your eyes and the red candle wax burning lips, she clings to the notion that it isn’t the dying that scares her, but the insurmountable loneliness that follows in the wake of your departure. It is hollow and damning because you are attempting to leave, in more ways than one, and she is running out of options that will force you to stay.
Longing breaches through the whisper of her words, “You were too much, in all the soft ways I desire to detest. Too good, too simple; too easy to love. And so, I wanted-” Wednesday’s breath falters, fingers folding to tear at the lines of each palm. “I wanted to make you pay, for forcing these ugly emotions upon me. I never wished to feel the juvenile propensity to need you, in all the foul ways weaker beings fall victim to. Yet, it is those feelings that beg of me to forfeit this charade, because, for however seldom I say it, I do love you.”
Finally, Wednesday reaches for your hand, knuckles scraping along the stone to slot her fingers between your own. “I’m in love with you, and it is all-consuming, vile, and entirely effortless. I may not know how it will end, but I believe there exists a place out there built just for the two of us; one that is otherworldly, and beautiful, and so, so alive. Destiny be damned.”
Wednesday watches as your eyes crawl the length of her face, an unreadable expression marring the expanse of your features. A shudder partly pulls your body away from her, a heavy exhale escaping your lips. She can’t tell whether her words were well received as you hunch your knees under your chin, cradling your elbows around the edges of your calves. Just as she goes to continue, desperation clinging to the fraying ends of her sanity, your free palm craters the ground beneath you.
Long forgotten wraiths spiral into view and confusion tears her form upwards onto her feet, unwittingly losing the grip she has on you. They begin to chase her and the ground beneath her feet zooms out of focus as she tries to get away. They’re faster, upon Wednesday in mere seconds, and then she’s falling, falling, falling, and for a long moment nothing comes up to catch her.
Yet again, the scenery of the throne room changes and she stumbles to her knees in a foreign land.
Grass bunches up between her fingers, wet and coarse, and a graveyard looms before her. Each tombstone lining the distance is marked with a name, cementing every loss she’s ever faced; not just of people, but places and emotions too. A beat passes before you appear at her side, steps away from an open casket set six feet in the ground. When she shuffles up to unsteady feet, the body within it looks suspiciously like you.
Your voice carries on the wind, circling her as you murmur, “What if you’re wrong?”
There’s a slew of answers on the tip of Wednesday’s tongue, but most fall short, never quite encompassing what she truly wants to say. One, though, rises above the rest, so simple it makes her want to scoff. Instead, she pushes the sound down, and in the midst of the words that follow, a part of her realizes that she’s finally learning; understanding. There are things in the world that you need not fight, nor feelings that are too childish to accept. Some things are just simple; easy.
“But what if I’m right?”
Out of the corner of her eye, Wednesday sees you sway slightly in place, her words – honest at last – completely sinking in. With a noticeable limp stuttering your footsteps, you gradually move in front of her. The tips of your dress shoes scratch along the edges of her own boots as you eliminate every ounce of Wednesday’s personal space, your arm rising up in her peripheral vision. Hesitation faults the movement, and she recognizes the doubt for what it is: a fear she never meant to place within you; of her reaction, of her motives, of her.
With time, she promises to herself to put all of her wrongs right, but for now, she gently latches onto your wrist, bringing your hand down to rest on the underside of her jaw. Your eyes flash with recognition before your forehead descends upon hers, a shaky breath exhaling against her lips that sounds like an okay. Suddenly boneless, your body sags, shoulders loosening as your other arm reaches around the small of her back, tugging her into you.
You hold onto Wednesday tighter than she ever had the audacity to covet her desires and she cannot deny the sense of home that follows.
Without fear, her feet lift up, gaining a slight height advantage to place a lingering kiss atop your head, but a figure drifts into focus before her eyes can close. The beast faintly shimmers behind the tombstone with your name on it that fades, a neutral expression on it’s face. It watches Wednesday closely, eyes of coal simmering into ash as it takes in your figure so entwined with her own. Your heart still resides in it’s palm, but even from here, Wednesday can gauge how loosely it’s grip is. A nod of a head and a quirk of lips beckons her, once last time, to take in another truth.
Love has many faces, and seldom are they seen clearly.
Your heart finds its way back to its home as the beast settles, slowly descending in height, and it’s features melt into a vaguely familiar countenance. It is you, but aged, with laugh lines marking the corners of your eyes, and a nostalgic smile at the cusp of your lips. And it is an echo, of both your and her future, teetering on the edge of a forever that will soon be fully earned.
( – there are places in wednesday that the light doesn’t touch and she can’t help but to put you in all of them.
but then you learn to become the light, and all the dark places shine.)
#jenna ortega x reader#wednesday addams imagines#wednesday addams x reader#wednesday addams x you#wednesday x reader#jenna ortega#wednesday addams
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Every time I see a description of autistics and their routines, esp ones aimed to make allistics understand better, I feel like my experiences as an actually autistic person are completely misrepresented by it. And it's entirely possible that it's just me always finding posts that weren't meant for me specifically, but I've never found anyone talk abt autistic routines and be like "yep, that's me, that's how routines feel to me".
It sometimes feels like that even the most well-meaning of posts or articles or whatever boil down to the idea that, at the end of the day, an autistic person's routine doesn't serve any "real" purpose. That routines are just what we got used to over time, and as such they bring us familiarity and comfort, but beyond that familiarity and comfort they are senseless and pointless. That you should respect an autistic person's routine (so long as it's not harming anyone) - despite it being obviously nonsense.
And to be clear, I don't think there's anything wrong with routines "just" for the sake of familiarity and comfort, and I do agree that you should respect ppl's boundaries even if they don't make sense to you. This isn't the problem. My issue is that every time I take a look at my own routines, I could take each and every part of it and tell you exactly what specific purpose it serves and why it cannot be removed without serious negative consequences.
For example. I tend to eat at the same times every day, because my body sucks at telling me properly when I'm hungry and sticking to time instead of bodily sensations allows me to ensure I eat properly. I always go through my morning routine the same way because "morning routine" is a lot easier to remember than remembering each and every element of getting ready, individually, every morning. I take the same route to work every time because paying attention to my surroundings is extremely taxing, and walking the familiar path lets me turn off my mind and let my instincts instead of conscious decisions direct me.
And this perspective changes why I might be upset about changes in routine as well. It's not just upsetting because it's unfamiliar and scary, it's upsetting because the consequences can be downright painful. If I don't eat on time I might forget to eat at all and could end up in a too-hungry-to-eat spiral that can take days to escape. If my morning routine is messed with I am almost certain to forget at least one step of it, which, depending on the step, can mess with my entire rest of the day (for instance, forgetting to pack my bottle and not being able to drink as a result).
So much of the advice I see floating around regarding these routines seems to be of the belief that they don't actually stem from anything besides habit, and as such the negative reaction to deviation from these routines is purely emotional (and irrational). Even in the better cases that don't just outright dismiss this emotional reaction as something to be ignored, there's still this undertone that the emotional reaction can be culled and autistic ppl can be taught how to be more adaptable and how to let go of these routines, by showing them how to handle the emotional reaction better.
And while I don't necessarily think this is bad advice (it can be really helpful esp as an autistic person to figure out ways to step outside your already rather small comfort zone, so advice like this is actually greatly appreciated), but I really wish there was more acknowledgement of routines that are based on more physical and practical stuff and can't be changed with determination and patience alone. That sometimes the emotional reaction is completely rational and justified, and that some routines can't really be changed without facing some incredibly negative consequences.
#inspired by a couple thoughts i had recently#with new year's eve coming up#i've even had ppl dismiss my concerns over smth#bc of course i would be worried abt it cuz it's change#and autistic ppl don't like change#as if my concerns weren't completely valid on their own#autism#autistic#actually autistic#neurodivergent#actually neurodivergent
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AND I AM BACK TO THE FIC REC GRIND BABY...Hope you enjoy them and give love to all the authors <3
Short fics:
he slips in to relieve the pain by weeb_grass (M, 3.3k, Complete)
Yuuji cannot sleep now that he's got another soul picking at him from within his own mind. Megumi keeps replaying the moment Sukuna ripped his friend's heart out. Both find ways to cope with the pain of emotional manipulation. "You stupid boy, Sukuna whispered into the deep crevices of Yuuji’s heart. You stupid, love-sick boy."
My Love Mine All Mine by darlingscurse (T, 8.1k, Complete)
“Not to worry, Yoshino,” Gojo announces brightly and while Megumi can’t see his eyes he feels them flicker to him for the smallest fraction of a second and something in his stomach drops. Oh no. “I just know what to do. Don’t you worry about that, your teacher has it all figured out!” Megumi opens his mouth, impending doom hanging over his head like a storm cloud, but by then it’s already too late, lightning has already struck. Gojo, the biggest ass in human history, flashes thumbs up in the round and then goes: “I’m sure our brightest little shikigami user would love to help you.” (or: Yuji comes back from the dead, comes back from the dead with a shiny new friend and Megumi is totally cool with that. Everything's peachy. Really.) PS: this one for all the people (me) who LOVEE Megumi absolutely loathing Junpei for no reason except the fact Yuuji befriends him (sorry Junpei)
kiss me not him by tamarsilan (T, 9.4k , Complete)
Still, her mouth had nearly hung open in shock at the news. “Junpei and I are dating,” Itadori had said with a smile on her face, holding up her and Yoshino’s intertwined hands. In their shared college dorm, Yoshino’s socked toes had dragged against their carpet, unsure. Fushiguro had been glad that she was sitting at the time. Between her hands the bunny-adorned coffee mug, Itadori had made her, threatened to shatter Or: Fushiguro Megumi and the five stages of grief
Conbini Kisses by Anonymous (T, 2.1k, Complete)
Itadori’s anger, Megumi can deal with. His silence, however, is torture. ————— Now they’ve reconnected, Fushiguro and Itadori have a much needed conversation.
The Brotherly Code by awkwardtypeos (T, 2.8k, Complete)
He sighs heavily, and looks his best friend dead in the eye, and finally delivers the news. “You cannot court Fushiguro. He is not worthy of you. I must ask you to put a stop to this.” Itadori blinks at him once, twice, several times, and then absolutely squawks, high-pitched and certainly not manly, “W-what do you mean? Todo that’s-that’s none of your business!"
sweet disposition by Nicolefrickle (T, 3.1k, Complete)
Itadori needs touched, and Megumi needs to heal
Long Fics:
you may bury my body by movequickly (M, 32.9k, Complete)
In all the worst ways, Yuji is just like Suguru. PS: I could not sleep for 3 whole days after reading this...this fic is intense i won't lie, the gojo and yuuji scenes are hard to swallow, gojo and geto scenes even more but all in all this also feels like a love letter to Yuuji
Saving You by earthtodora (T, 73k, Ongoing)
Yuji dies in the battle against Sukuna in Shinjuku. When he wakes up in the infirmary, he finds that he's in the past, before the events of the Culling Game, and the Shibuya Incident. Yuji must try to avoid making the same mistakes, and find a way to defeat the King of Curses and save the people he cares about. But first, he must find a way to deal with his own trauma and come to terms with the future he left behind. --- "Sensei," Yuji spoke up suddenly, snapping Gojo out of his thoughts. Gojo looked over at him. "Yes, Yuji?" "I want you to kill me."
tears of a tiger (there is no night without dawn) by rugbratz (T, 53.9k, Completed)
Yuuji understands that most people in his situation would be excited for the promise of tomorrow and what it may bring. But that’s not him. Yuuji can’t even begin to explain the conglomeration of emotions that he feels, but he knows that all of them are horrible and that he’s not ready. He never is.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#itafushi#yuji itadori#jjk itadori#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#fushiita#jujutsu megumi#megumi x yuuji#itadori x fushiguro#itafushi fic recs#fushiita fic recs#fic rec list#fic recs#ao3 fic recs#fic rec
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Political Posting
I know I'm a sonic franchise fan blog, but I cannot sit idle while I watch the freedoms of myself and my fellow Americans spin the drain. I know it will be exhausting, but I've lived through this once before as an angry teenager.
But she's back, and she's even madder as an adult with a degree in Anthropology; a student of sociology; a patron of history; a woman from the deep south; a bisexual; a LIVING BREATHING BEING WITH RIGHTS!
I hate that people won't call a duck a duck.
THESE MEN ARE NAZIS.
PEACE HAS GOTTEN US NOTHING.
VIOLENCE BEGOTS VIOLENCE, BUT PERHAPS IT IS THE ONLY LANGUAGE PSYCHOPATHS WITH THE IQ OF MEAT PIGS CAN SPEAK.
Nothing gets done in this nation without violence. Nothing will ever happen. "Progress is slow!" They say.
Progress is not always positive. Donald Trump has unchecked, unprecedented power. Germany was dismantled in 53 days by three men one of which gets all the credit because he was the acting Chancellor. What makes you think DJT won't destroy the United States in 30 days? He already destroyed the election with interference, propaganda, and outright election fraud!
"Oh, but stranger on the internet, this nation is a global force! We cannot take on a nation!"
You spineless fool, have you forgotten the blood-soaked birth of our nation?
And yes, it is that serious. Tomorrow CHILDREN will be DRAGGED from their ELEMENTARY SCHOOLS FOR SIMPLY BEING BROWN IN AMERICA.
THE PUBLIC HAS NO IDEA WHERE THEY WILL BE HOLDING THESE INNOCENT PEOPLE UNTIL THEY CAN "DEPORT" THEM.
That is a page straight out of the Nazi's playbook.
If you didn't care about censorship, libraries, gay people, trans people, disabled people, schools, unions, workers rights, Muslims, minimum wage, birth control, women, sexual education, or voting rights perhaps you will care about this tidbit from the aftermath of WW2:
First they came for the Communists And I did not speak out Because I was not a Communist Then they came for the Socialists And I did not speak out Because I was not a Socialist Then they came for the trade unionists And I did not speak out Because I was not a trade unionist Then they came for the Jews And I did not speak out Because I was not a Jew Then they came for me And there was no one left To speak out for me Pastor Martin Niemöller
You are not immune to the incoming cullings because of your status. You are not immune to propaganda. In order for a dictatorship to function it needs to convince the public that it has an enemy. You will become the enemy.
#usa politics#usa#us politics#donald trump#elon musk#fuck trump#trump administration#jd vance#democracy#democrats#republicans#gop#conservatives#fuck maga#fuck donald trump#fuck conservatives#fuck elon musk#fuck mark zuckerberg#lgbtqiia+#lgbtq community#protect trans kids#protect women#protect children#protect immigrants#issue#lgbtq rights#muslim#islam#religious freedom#free speech
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Could you please make a yuta x reader one where goes violent over seeing y/n get hurt?? I love your fics😭
1000000000% lets do it
pairing: reader (f) x bf!Yuta (aged up)
synopsis: in which you get hurt in a dangerous mission, and Yuta cannot contain his anger
warning: curse killing, cursing, gore-esque imagery. Additionally, potential spoilers?
setting: pre-Shinjuku and kinda pre-Culling (sorry if this spoils anything as well x)
a/n: this is kinda long, im so sorry! i got really into the idea. thank you anon for the sick prompt, and for enjoying my writing! it warms my heart and makes my days so much better to know that you like my works :)
This wasn't your first mission with higher grade Sorcerers.
For a while now, you've been allowed to join the bandwagon of the higher ranks, learning from them and their style of fighting. This came to fruition after Yuji had not only sent a letter of recommendation, but put in a good word in for you when speaking with Gojo and the council. Despite Gojo's concern, since you recently just became a Grade 2 Sorcerer, he trusted Yuta's word. And he had yet been led astray, considering you graduated with flying colors within all your ranks.
Well, until today.
You joined this mission with Yuta, Maki, and Toge. You never felt worried as you were surrounded by Sorcerers with profound knowledge as fighters, cursed users, and cursed weapon users. But you always pulled your own, ensuring to tackle Curses that were much easier for the other three. But in this comfort left room for your naivety and misjudgment to flourish.
"There's glass all over," Maki murmurs, leading the charge through the dim hallway of the hospital. The entire hospital unfortunately had a code black, in which an active shooter entered and caused many tragedies. To this end, the hospital was entirely evacuated and closed up for further human investigation. "Watch your step."
Yuta was behind you all, with Toge and you at center keeping in eye on the rooms you all were passing. The gruesome scent of dried blood and still bodies shot pangs of nausea to your stomach. As you quietly held your stomach, Toge taps your shoulder and offers you a mint. "Thank you, Inumaki," you hum, immediately chewing the artificial menthol.
As broken lights flickered, and medical supplies were sprawled all over the ground, Maki quickly stops. Looking up at the signs for direction, she lets out a deep sigh, "we're here." You were in the ER wing of the hospital, which was reported to have seen the most deaths. "Prepare yourselves for what you're about to see."
You all nod, with Yuta quickly placing a hand on your shoulder. "You two go on ahead," Yuta hums. "I'll send Rika to scout ahead of you." With those words, the Queen of Curses appeared from behind Yuta, her large intimidating frame taking over everyone's shadows. "Please warn us, Rika."
With that command, Rika takes charge, allowing Maki and Toge to slowly follow behind her. Yuta narrows his eyes to meet yours, a soft smile playing at his lips. His hands slide down to your own, and give them a light squeeze. His hands were so refreshing compared to yours, which were clammy with nerves. "Are you anxious?" He asks curiously. You sheepishly nod. "This isn't like you-- you're never this nervous."
You give him a shrug, "m'not a fan of hospitals, and seeing... dead people."
Yuta straightens his lips and nods, "I'm not a big fan myself, especially considering your role in this mission. It is why I stopped us here to talk about it first."
"Hm?"
"It would appear that there is only one curse, a Grade 1 cursed spirit. For this, the only thing we need you to do is identify the lives lost," Yuta hums quietly. His blue eyes dim and he could feel pangs of guilt from your solemn expression. "I wanted to warn you without making you feel incapable. But I believe in you so much that I know you'll be able to do this."
You look into his eyes, the ones that put you in a trance every time. Those damn dak eyes could get Yuta whatever he wanted out of you, despite your feelings and detest. You give him a reassuring squeeze, "I got it."
Yuta's infectious smile returns, "that's my girl." He cups your face into his hands and parts a peck on your forehead. "Let us handle the spirit, ignore it and focus on your task."
You nod, finding peace once again in his gaze. But the soothing air was quickly stripped when Maki's voice is heard from the other room. "Yuta! Y/N! We found it!"
You two quickly rush over, with you trying to brace yourself for the sight. When entering the ER, you noticed how completely in disarray it was. Dividing curtains broken and on the ground, gurneys scattered all over, 50% hosting dead bodies. You hear your breath shake, but concern quickly waived when Yuta patted your back.
"Look at all of their wristbands," Yuta advises. "It's the easiest way to find the victim's name and date of birth."
You nod, preparing yourself for it all. As you did, Yuta left you to join Maki and Toge. You didn't give it too much of a look, as Yuta insists you ignore it. But you noticed an energy emanating from a gurney that felt purposely centered in the room.
As you rushed through each body, numbing your brain from the lifelessness in the room. You tried to keep focused, despite the grunts, groans, and yelling you were hearing from behind you. Yuta needs me to do this, you think to yourself. Focus!
But your nerves were sporadic as you listened to them slightly struggle. "Maki!" Yuta yells, his katana working overtime as he sliced through the spirits power. Maki was immersed in her combat with the spirit, deflecting all its moves in swift, but struggling manner. She was always a clean fighter-- definitely one of the best in the newer generation of Sorcerers. But, even so...
"Ah--!" Maki uses her staff to deflect injury, but the power that poured from the spirit was too strong for even her to stop. She was pushed to her limits, and flung to a wall, the plaster shaping around her beat body. Cuts were now ornate on her body, with some likely leaving scars.
This was the moment you turned and realized the gravity of the situation. Maki falls to the ground, having enough energy to soften the blow. You quickly begin to rush over to Maki, to which Yuta immediately yells at you to stop. "Don't!" Yuta spat. He begins to take over the battle, the distorted-looking spirit beginning to tango with Yuta. "Stay away-- Maki will be fine!"
You gulp from the nerves as you watched Toge quickly make his way to Maki instead. He picks her up and places her in a corner, allowing her to take a moment to breath. Turning around, Toge waits to meet eyes with Yuta. Yuta, with amazing footwork, manages to put some distance between him and the dangerous entity. When his blue eyes meet with Toge's, he immediately pulls down his collar. "Switch."
The two men quickly vanish before appearing in one anothers places. Your eyes widen when you see Toge, blood running down his mouth, begin to fight with the spirit. You look over to where Maki is, noticing that Yuta was already performing Reverse Technique on her. "Rika, go help Toge!" Yuta commands, with Rika quickly floating over to join Toge's efforts.
You rush over to Yuta and Maki, in which Maki was sat with groans and grunts spilling from her lips. Your heart was racing, the feeling in your legs threatening to escape. "Wh-what... h-how can I help?" Your words are imbued with anxiety.
"Keep yourself safe," Yuta instructs, "don't worry about us-- we'll be fine!" He looks over at the bodies you were previously searching through. "Continue your mission, don't stop!"
You nod, but realized you couldn't when you met eyes with the spirit. The abstract being was completely ornate with bandages, syringes coming out of its 'body.' It had one eye that was able to travel around its body, being able to look at all its surrounding if choosing so. Its eye then noticed Yuta and began to advance towards him, ignoring Toge completely. Toge rushed behind it, but his efforts would be futile as the curse was much faster than him.
"Yuta!" You scream, staying in space with your arms spread. Your technique, which Gojo coins as the Onion Infinity, is a technique in which there are multiple layers between two objects. Of course, your strength is dust in comparison to Gojo's, meaning the layers of shield is only a tactic to give you more time to consider your next move.
The curse is stopped by your technique, but slowly realizes that it can claw its way through it. Yuta notices and looks up at you with immense worry, "Y/N, why didn't you listen to me? I told you to continue what you were doing!"
"It was charging at you-- I didn't have a choice!" You argued, your strength slowly depleting with every layer being broken. While Yuta continued healing Maki and expressing his gripe over your defiance, you begin looking around. You noticed Toge on his knees, struggling with the pain in his throat after using his technique. Rika made her way to the curse, but struggles to stop his unrelenting advances towards you.
"Y/N, move out of the fucking way, now!" Yuta screamed. "You're going to get hurt!"
You move, but not quite where anybody was expecting. You run over to a small wheeled cabinet, ripping out the drawers in search of something. After a sea of bandages and pills, you found a dark green bottle. Your eyes drag on the medicines name and quickly look over at Toge.
"Inumaki-senpai!" You shout, throwing the medicine towards his way. As you hurl it, you didn't realize your barrier had completely been broken, and a sharp pain was met in your stomach. The curse had transformed its arm into a stake, piercing your stomach and through your back. Your spinal bones crack at its force, forcing blood to be coughed out.
Yuta's eyes widened, and he went deaf. Only a piercing ringing could be heard for him, putting an entire halt to his healing. Maki sits up, well enough to get back on her feet but not quite all there. She adjusts her cursed weapon, shaking Yuta's shoulders desperately. She shouts with urgency, but Yuta could not hear her.
He felt his world shatter while your gruesome screams returned his sound. He got up, ignoring Maki's touch and attempts to keep him calm. "Yuta, please!" Maki urges, "we're going to get her out of there right now."
He raises a hand, "stay down, Maki. You should not continue to fight with your injuries."
Maki slams his back, "are you insane? You can't take that thing on your own-- it will kill you!"
"Rika," Yuta hums quietly. Rika nods and quickly creates a gap between him and Maki. She clouds over Maki, keeping her from assisting him. "I'm very sorry to do this, Maki. But you are in no shape to continue this mission."
Maki growls, "Y/N is going to die here if I don't help you!" She looks over at Toge, who was downing the throat medicine you passed him. Her eyes widen at your quick thinking. She looks back at Yuta, "how the hell are you going to--"
Yuta slowly walks over to the curse, who finally ripped out its arm from your body. A string of pained curses leave your lips, your entire body going completely hot in discomfort. You could feel yourself go dizzy, but you still find it in you to begin your own Reverse Technique. Its weak and slow, but you had no other choice. You weren't sure whether you were going to make it out or not.
Without another moment wasted, Toge narrows his eyes on the curse and opens his mouth, "explode!" Although it was not enough to kill the curse, it was enough to damage it. The equivalent of blood splatters from its body, the obsidian-colored liquid finding home on the broken floor.
Yuta drags his katana on the floor, the DNA of the curse sticking onto the cold blade. While continuing his stride, Yuta lifts the blade horizontally and swipes a bit of the blood onto his index finger. As the curse writhes trying to regain itself, Yuta consumes the blood and swallows it down like a pill.
"Rika," Yuta begins with a dark, hollow voice. You look over worriedly, the pain of your stomach preventing you from uttering a word. You had never seen Yuta this... furious before. So angry that he almost appeared desolate, depleted of all life. "Lend me your strength over here."
Rika leaves her post, and rushes behind Yuta. Maki takes this opportunity to run to you, taking you into her lap. "H-hey!" She holds your face in one hand and shakes you, fearful of the way your eyes rolled behind your head on their own. Your body was fighting consciousness as you healed yourself, uncertain if it would work at all.
An unfamiliar, strange feeling pours into all of you, with Toge looking back worriedly at Yuta while making his way to you. You force your eyes to stay focused on Yuta, with your mind frustrated with your sudden inability to speak. Tears finally stream out, and you watch as Yuta's curse energy glow around him like a dark aura. Toge ignores it for now, downing the last bit of the medicine before looking down at you, "heal faster."
Though you yourself were exhausted, Toge's cursed speech shot a wave of energy in you. Your Reverse Technique hastens, your flesh slowly making its way to connect with one another again. As your body was making a promising recovery, Yuta's body was being completely coated with his cursed energy.
Rika's arms transformed themselves into stake-like shapes, mimicking the same ability as the foe before them. "Hold it down for me, Rika," Yuta instructs coolly. Rika quickly creates more stakes with her body, using them to push the curse to the ground, and nail it down with her new, stake-like limbs.
As the curse struggled under Rika, Yuta hovers over it and chuckles. "Does it feel good?" Yuta asks in a hum, watching in attempt to get free. It hissed at Yuta's face. "I figured it didn't. The only thing that's going to hurt more than this, is your death."
You look over worriedly at Yuta as your body was near its full recovery. Maki and Toge held you, as you felt restless in this moment. Yuta was furious, and you could barely even talk to try and calm him down. You could only hold your stomach in pain, and watch as your lover relieves his frustration and regret.
He begins to cut away at the curse, using his weapon to chop away at its limbs. Yuta could only see read, and his arms pulsed with yearn to destroy. The curse would screech with each slice of his katana, earning no remorse from Yuta. His face was cold, his body unreactive to the agony that he was causing. Rika no longer had anything to hold down, and stood back as Yuta was faced with just the head of the curse. The once intimidating eye was now shrunk, looking small under Yuta's undeniable strength. It screeches with what you imagine is begging for mercy, but Yuta was deaf to it.
Not that he couldn't hear, but he could not care.
With one hand in his pocket, the other held up the katana right above the curses eye, giving it a few more moments of life. "Die," Yuta mutters. Without another second more, he drops the katana down onto the curse, killing it, and eradicating it from this world. He returns his weapon to the sheath behind him, color returning to his body and eyes as he makes his way towards you.
He takes you from Maki's hold and holds you tight, "fuck, fuck, fuck-- are you okay, Y/N?"
Maki slaps his forearm, "you're hurting her, Yuta."
He panics, loosening his grip as he frantically searches for calmness in your pained expression, "I..." His voice breaks, defeat clear in his eyes. "Y/N, m'so sorry I let you get hurt... I really fucked up this time." Tears coat his dark blue eyes.
You bring a weak hand up to pat his chest, unable to verbally ease his mind. You only lean into him a little more, your heart calming down from his touch. You were glad it was over, and more glad that you were in Yuta's arms.
Maki manages to stand, helping Toge up as well while Yuta stood up, keeping you carried safely in his arms. His strength, despite his immense output of cursed energy just now, felt boundless now. It was almost like he didn't break a sweat.
Maki pats Toge's back a bit, while Toge coughed out a last bit of blood, "she held her own, though. Her strategy to get Toge back into the fight was very surprising, but wise."
Yuta was indifferent, "she could have died from my carelessness. I shouldn't have let her come to this mission." You begin to pat at his chest in defiance but he wasn't keen on hearing you out. "I almost lost my partner. I'm not interested in putting us in that predicament again."
"If you won't vouch for her, we will," Maki insisted. "She understands the dangers of doing this, and still wants to continue her growth. I'd say she deserves to continue these missions, considering she still wants to do them."
"Salmon," Toge manages to say while nodding his head.
Yuta's eyes drop to yours, trying to find some sort of disagreement. But your eyes held conviction and fight. Despite your pale face and weak body, you still held that vigor that made Yuta fall for you in the first place. He looks down at your stomach realizing that your technique was giving out.
"Lets go back and see Doctor Shoko," Yuta hums. Although you were safe and sound, Yuta's grip and hold on you did not relent. His hands still had a bit of shake to them, and Rika was much closer to Yuta than usual. "I'm glad you're still here," Yuta whispers the moment he watched your eyes flutter shut.
hope this was good ahhh
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#yuta okkotsu#yuta jjk#jjk yuta okkotsu#yuta x reader#jjk yuta#okkotsu yuta#zenin maki#toge inumaki#inumaki toge#maki zenin#reader x yuta okkotsu#reader x yuta#jjk aged up#jjk x reader#jjk spoilers
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My hypothesis, untested as yet, is that when it comes to addressing disenfranchised people in the USA, and possibly similar countries, being targeted by a conservative and/or authoritarian government through laws or policiea designed to worsen the lives of said disenfranchised people, or place them into elevated danger, hypothetically I think any approach to addressing or redressing that situation needs to direct focus exclusively at the particular people who compose said conservative / authoritarian government.
My basis for this hypothesis is the oft mentioned but rarely applied idea that the members of a disenfranchised group shouldn't have to symbolically represent the entire group. Seeing as how no one single individual or collective can ever singularly represent all human experience, and as a general recognition that we do not want to be dragged down in puritanical politics or calvinist christofascist dogma, it behooves of to recognize that even people we do not like will be targeted by systemic oppression, and will not serve as the symbolic ideal of a disenfranchised community, and those people are not less deserving of an equitable life. That kind of idea, even if tending to be forgotten in the heat of the moment, is pretty solidly accepted theory.
So coming back, my hypothesis is an extension of this theory. Any of us as part of disenfranchised groups should reject the castigation of targets of the hegemony for their failure to meet our ideals, and focus those feelings on how to push back at the people who are implementing and enforcing the actions which target us and others like us. Unfortunately it will mean we all have to live with a lot of behavior from allies which we personally or collectively would like to see improved, because those improvements also offer long term benefits.
However, my hypothesis is that if the focus and direction of our actions remains unwaveringly directed away from our fellow targets of fascist or authoritarian or hegemonic violence and oppression, then we will find greater and better success overall than attempting to self-correct inward at every substandard element.
I think being vulnerable means being part of an unyielding wall that resolutely points action at the oppressors, and away from the oppressed, and that even includes the oppressed who don't act as part of the wall. To point to another theory of society, conservatives and authoritarians like to foment outrage at "free riders" who benefit from society while contributing nothing. However, as we also know, part of a functional society means that we must agree to carry free riders, because the benefits of a society are specifically intended this way. "Free riders" can also be the sick or elderly or poor or disabled, and society is meant to ensure those same people have the same equitable treatment and benefits as everyone else. It is established theory that we cannot cull some idealized human wheat from hypothetical human chaff. We never know and can't make that determination. Society must include all of us regardless of perceived contribution or it is not a functional society.
So my hypothesis is again an extension here, if no one disenfranchised individual or collective can be held as the ideal of the disenfranchised group, and also if we must accept that society supports all memembers with nothing witheld contigent on the member contributions, then i.y hypothesis we come back to having to support people who we feel have not supported us. Not as individuals, but collectively, as many overlapping and interlinked disenfranchised groups, it is our obligation to turn the response against the oppressors. And in the USA, especially now more than ever, we can easily find the specific conservative republicans who are most responsible and work at targeting them politically to resist their individual efforts collectively. As we select these individuals and focus on them, my hypothesis is that their reduced effectiveness or their elimination from power, will slow or restrict the larger authoritarian appartus operating in the USA generally. It will work but it means letting go of targets which are within easier reach because they are part of our collective network of disenfranchised groups.
There are many, many easy individuals who can be targets of collective action, people who push for our military budget, people who lobby against bodily autonomy, people who work against voting rights. They are a big machine but we out number the individuals who make up the parts. Somewhere near any and all of us is a far right republican working in a small part of the machine within our reach. Their position and purpose and politics are public knowledge. Any time you're mad at someone under attack by the conservative policies of the USA, turn that on the smallest and weakest republican in government you can find. Lobby against them, run against them, show up to their meetings or office and waste their time, call their constituents to make them angry about their republican representation. Do any little thing that acts outward. They're not all untouchable capital hill politicians who can ignore their unhappy majorities, but those untouchable people at the top can't get anything done without the little goobers at the bottom.
My hypothesis is that if we take all the energy we direct inward and point it at the easiest republican targets in the USA, we end up showing we can win, and making every next republican in line a weaker and easier target.
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Permanent List Purge
It is that time of year again when I go through my permanent list and cull anyone who hasn't interacted in a while.
If you want to be removed from the list, please go ahead and leave a comment, tag or drop me a line in my DMs or ask box. I promise I won't be mad if you do. I'll miss you though and wish you well. But no, seriously I won't be mad.
This is what happens:
I post the whole list of people I tag for every story and then again the ones that haven't interacted with my posts in awhile. Usually three months.
Then every Saturday for the next month, I repost it, modified with any changes to the list. Like if someone said they will or won't be staying.
Then on Nov. 30th, if you haven't responded by 4pm EST, then you WILL be removed from the list.
Any now open spots will go to those on my waiting list. THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO ASK TO BE ADDED TO EITHER LIST!! ANY REQUESTS WILL BE IGNORED!!!
PERMANENT LIST: 40
1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog
2- @gregre369 @a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system
3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog
4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji
5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon
6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman
7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth
8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss
THOSE THAT HAVEN'T INTERACTED IN MONTHS:
@mira-jadeamethyst @messrs-weasley @goodolefashionedloverboi @littlewildflowerkitten @rozzieroos (though this might be because I CANNOT tag them at all)
@lingeringmirth @a-lovely-craziness @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @anne-bennett-cosplayer
(The last four were added because they were very close to the three month mark, but barely squeaked in at two)
WAITING LIST:
Those that have been super active on my work and deserve a chance to be on the list.
@fearieshadow @dreamercec @blondie1006 @kultiras @thesecondfate
@sadisticaltarts @dolphincliffs @eyehartart
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maki is an interesting character, bc she is generally acknowledged to be one of gege's best written characters in jjk, period. regardless of gender.
but the reason she is so great, is because her arc is centered around her experiences as a girl in a patriarchal society. not one that fits into the standard either.
she's born into a family that is considered misogynistic by other clans' standards. as a twin, no less, which is considered a bad omen. with little to no curse energy to boot.
still, for a large portion of her life, she desired to prove herself to them. in a way that reminds me of the myth of meritocracy? that idea of "if you work hard enough, you can do anything you want and you can prove yourself to the naysayers."
but in her journey she learns it's impossible for her to rise in an institution that actively works against her.
this happens, specifically, when she goes to the zenin clan during the culling games (to simply collect tools). she's confronted by reality in ways that echo momo and nobara's conversation (about the weight of misogyny in their lives).
"A scar on the face can be a good thing for guys. But not for girls. You think the world of Jujutsu Sorcerers is based on skills? [It is] Sure. But only for guys. Even if a girl is skilled, if she's not cute, she is looked down upon. Of course, if she's only cute without any skill, it's the same. Women Jujutsu Sorcerers aren't expected to be skilled. They're expected to be perfect." (Momo, Chapter 40)
the first thing she is told when she visits the compound is "yikes, what a face. that ain't gonna heal. what are you gonna do Maki? [...] all you had going was your face and now it's wrecked. no one will even look in your direction anymore." (Chapter 148, p.2-3)
after that, she crosses paths with her mother, who, at face value, echoes the horror tropes of mothers that "fanatically conform to the institution" (i think her actions later make her more complex).
then, finally, maki comes across her father, who remarks on maki and mai's "worthlessness" to him. he's convinced himself he would be better off in life if they were dead.
maki's continuously told she has no value in this world. for things that are out of her control.
of course, this all leads to the loss of mai, who sacrifices herself in order to essentially push maki forward as a character bc "to gain something, you must offer something," in the world of jujutsu kaisen. this is not exclusive to them. it also leads to mai telling maki something that aligns really well with what "female rage" means to me:
"Destroy… Everything" (Chapter 149, p.12)
why?
i think there is no amount of climbing you can do in a society that is actively pulling you down. no way to become clan head in an institution that wants you dead.
i believe it's this realization that causes maki to embrace her "monstruous femininity" that ultimately results in her ascension (as a person, as a sorcerer).
i know some people criticize her decision to kill the zenin in honor of her sister's memory. but, i think the message here is that some institutions simply cannot be reformed.
also, note that with their destruction, maki's narratively released from their expectations.
anyways, what comes after is honestly hilarious. i think it's a mockery of what gege expected misogynistic readers to say. "you're not toji!" (Chapter 151, 6-19) as if drawing a parallel implies that she's his copy.
another charming detail to maki's character is how sumo helps her find freedom/her groove. considering how, in traditional sumo, "women are considered impure and cannot step into the ring". it's just something so fitting for maki who continually defies gender expectations.
long post to say: i honestly love her and i think ppl often ignore how entrenched her story is in the female experience bc they just see how buff she is.
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