#But I also hate that I'm thinking that because this was always my body
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SP Main Four + butters !College AU Relationship Headcanons
[☆] A/N | hii guys! i recently hit 500 likes on tumblr and i'm like so speechless... i never wouldve thought people would be interested in reading my stupid little writing hehe, so tysm! my long fic, most wanted, is coming to a close soon, and I have been working on another longfic that's a fem!reader insert x main 4 boys in college! i'm also probably going to write a more realistic/sadder headcanons, because this one was toothachingly sweet </3
[☆] C/W | NSFW under the cut, this is also for f!reader, but i'm open to writing a gn!reader or m!reader in the future
[☆] check out my !college au headcanons for the boys + butters here!
☆ stan marsh
hopeless romantic
will definitely do the most cheesy things for you
has a mixtape of songs that remind him of you
writes love letters, but never gives them to you
feels everything deeply, he's a big ol' baby
late night talks about his fears and dreams
craves emotional intimacy and trust w/ you
super duper attentive to your needs
will put you over himself
overthinks
enjoys laid-back dates! like movie dates, thrifting, strolls
gets jealous reallyyy easily
wont outright admit it tho
very insecure, if someone flirts with u, he'll just sulk LOL
avoids confrontations at all costs
not afraid to cry in front of you
vomits on you if you do something really provocative to him
always offer his jacket/hoodie to you
loves holding your hand
laces his fingers thru yours and swings your hands
goofy ah grin when you surprise him with kisses
big on cuddling
gets super flustered when his friends teases him about you
obsessed with your laugh
keeps a picture of you in his wallet
NSFW
sooo nervous during your first time with him
very eager to please!
takes his time learning what you like
kisses every inch of your body
starts with your lips and works his way down
definitely a soft dom
"does this feel good?" "tell me if you want me to stop"
loves holding your hand while in you
eats your p out like your his last meal
i think he would be more into receiving than giving, but doesn't mind giving at all!
gets shy when you compliment him and tell him how good he is making you feel
prefers gentle sex, unless you want it rough
his entire body flushes red when you tease his cock
like palming thru his shorts, or pressing quick kisses to his tip
loves to cum in your mouth
goes crazy if he gets to paint your face tho
i'm sorry but this man is into creampies...
gets turned on when you're really emotional/crying from him pleasuring you
favorite position is definitely cowgirl
definitely an ass man, loves squishing/pinching your skin
kisses your forehead, cheeks and lips after going down on you
i think he would also be kinda quiet, wouldn't let out that many moans
☆ kyle broflovski
shows his love thru actions rather than words
remembers every anniversary, even the little ones :)
makes detailed itineraries for dates
even though he's a yapper, he definitely enjoys listening to you
fiercely loyal
takes no disrespect towards you
ready to work anyone's shit as so much as they look at you funny
probably would like someone who would challenge him intellectually
needs you to have the same core values as him
DO NOT DO PDA WITH THIS MAN
he will just look at you with pure disgust if you even attempt to...
but will secretly hold hands under the table or sneak a kiss when no one is looking
puts too much pressure on himself to be perfect for you
always notices this little things about you
oh you changed your nail color? you applied your makeup differently?
will blush like crazy when you compliment him
awkwardly rubs the back of his neck
will get irrationally jealous
tries to hide it by cracking sarcastic jokes
writes you long thoughtful texts when your apart, updates you about his day, asks you how yours went
becomes super attentive when your sad or stressed
wraps you in a blanket, makes you tea
i feel like he'd hate the feeling of having a crush
but once he's in a relationship, lowkey a romantic, buy you books he'd think you'd like, jewelry that compliments your skin tone
NSFW
overthinks everything at first
constantly asks "is this okay? are you sure?"
like i said, super attentive, he needs to make sure you're okay
loves eye contact while fucking you
gets really shy when you take control but secretly loves it
prefers slow deliberate strokes and touches
has a thing for neck kisses– both giving and receiving
talks your through it
"you're perfect" "you feel so good"
gets competitive if you tease him about lasting longer
please kiss his freckles... he'll go absolutely feral
not afraid to leave hickeys, scratches or nail prints on you
wrap your legs around his waist, your arms around his neck and his life is yours LOL
i think missionary would be his favorite position
needs to see your face
it's his life mission to make you squirt...
loves fingering you
sit on his face ?
super embarrassed about his moans, but lets it out anyways lmfao
loves your titties, no matter the size
will beg you to let him cum in you
☆ kenny mccormick
we all know kenny is a natural flirt
will wink, smirk, and use cheesy pick-up lines to make you blush
loves physical affection
always has an arm around your waist
makes you laugh constantly
goes to extreme lengths to see you smile, whether it's his silly pranks or grand gestures
draws little hearts and doodles on your notebooks/texts
if he's super bored, he'll draw on your skin lmfao
super duper protective— he'll walk you home late at night and make sure you're always safe
loves taking you on adventurous dates, especially sneaking into places you're not supposed to be
calls you "babe," "sweetheart," or "princess" with that drawl of his hehe
not above embarrassing himself, will write cringe worthy poems or songs and serenade you
immediately notices when you're a little bit off
pulls you into a hug, rubbing your back
buys you little trinkets and steals snacks from eric, saying, "i saw this and thought of you!"
obsessed with kissing you, he'll lean in for a quick peck and smirks when he notices your smile
immediately goes back in for a longer kiss
i think he's super good at braiding hair, and loves playing with yours!
please wear his band tees <3
NSFW
super duper confident, definitely knows what he's doing
loves teasing you, using soft kisses and touches to drive you crazy before giving in
worships your body, tracing every curve with his lips and hands
like kyle, adores it when you take charge and being at your mercy
whispers dirty things in your ear, his voice low and sultry
"you're so fuckin' beautiful babe, I can't get enough of you."
VOCAL AS FUCK ! he'll groan, sigh, whisper your name, letting you know exactly how good you're making him feel
has a downright pornographic moan....
obviously a boob guy, he'll suck and manhandle your tits like there's no tomorrow
will cop a feel secretly infront of others as well LOL
also a thigh and neck guy—he'll kiss, nip, and mark you like he's marking a claim on you
definitely cums alot.... i'm sorry lmfao
dirty as fuck as well... spits in your mouth, puts his fingers in your mouth, making you suck him
taps his tip against your tongue, smearing his precum all over your lips
a big fan of sloppy toppy, grabbing your hair and face fucking you
he's tew good with his tongue... and so so messy when eating you out
will not hold back with his noises, literally slurping ???
loves loves loves overstimulation
favorite position is mating press, loves looking at where you guys connect
cusses when he cums
will crack some corny joke afterward to make you laugh,
"so... we're pretty good at this, huh?" and giggles like a schoolgirl
loves cuddling afterwards!
☆ eric cartman
definitely does grand gestures
brags to everyone about being in a relationship
"yeah, she's lucky to have me."
nobody believes that...
hates PDA in theory, but secretly loves it when you grab his hand or kiss his cheek
he'll complain, but his blushing face gives him away
sends you the most random memes and videos throughout the day as his way of saying he's thinking abt you <3
gets ridiculously competitive when it comes to impressing you
if someone else buys you flowers, he'll show up with a bouquet and stuffed animal, screaming profanities at the other person
jealousss to the max
glares daggers at everyone he perceives a threat, coming up with some sick and twisted plan is his head to take 'em down
gets super pouty when you tease him, but loves the banter between the two of you "i'm not fat, i'm big-boned and you know it!"
will absolutely demand you come over to "study", but in reality he just wants to spend time with you hehehe
has a soft spot when you baby him a little
like brushing his hair or adjusting his hoodie, he'll pretend to hate it but he's melting inside
if you're upset, he'll try to cheer you up in his own weird way...
usually a mix of crude jokes and awkward affection ??
please don't cry infront of him, he'll just panic
keeps a picture of you on his phone as his lock screen, and gets super defensive if anyone points it out
"shut up kahl! it's not even a big deal!"
gaslights the hell out of you, but eventually gives in when he realizes you'll just gaslight him back
will bring you up in any and every conversation, and doesn't care if it annoys the fuck out of his friends
proudly shows off your achievements and loudly declare that you're the bestest girlfriend in the world !
until you piss him off...
NSFW
talks a big game about being dominant and kinky
but he's secretly all about soft and sensual moments with you <3
loves loves loves being in control, rarely lets you take the lead
he needs to boost his ego somehow!
will grab your jaw to force you to look at him, his nails pressing hard into your cheeks
"awe, my poor baby is being fucked too dumb, can't even speak properly"
i'm sorry, but this man never shuts up in bed
whether it's dirty talk or low/breathy moans, he's always yapping
really mean too ):
depending on his mood, he'll either take you to pound town, or just veryy lazy sex
gets flustered if you tell him how good he's making you feel, and fails majorly covering it up
"well, duh. i'm amazing."
loves leaving hickeys—he'll mark you in places just barely hidden, so you're always reminded your his.
obsessed with the fat of your ass and tits, doesn't matter the size—he's all about kisses and touches
will 100% lose focus if you whisper in his ear
his cocky demeanor crumbles instantly, and he's completely at your mercy
gets embarrassed easily if you get too emotional, crying and pawing at his chest that you feel too good
this man does not own a single condom... he'll just pull out and paint your stomach
edges you when he's in a particularly bad mood, and only gives in when you're begging
definitely prefers receiving over giving, but likes the feeling of your walls clamping down on his fingers
asks you to stick out your tongue so he can see the load he blew LMFAOO WHY DID I WRITE THIS
i can't decide if he'd prefer doggy style or cowgirl, so ig just depends on his mood?
has a secret stash of candles or mood lighting for when things get "serious"
will deny deny deny it if anyone ever finds out.
his aftercare is surprisingly sweet— he'll tuck you in, grab snacks, and make sure you're comfortable before he starts pretending he doesn't care <3
☆ butters stotch
is THE definition of doting boyfriend
he'll write you sweet notes and hide them in your bag for you to find later
always asks for your opinion on everything
from what outfit he should wear to what movie the two of you should watch
he just wants to make you happy 😭
blushes like crazy when you compliment him, his hands fidgeting nervously as he stammers out a thank you
will call you every nickname under the sun
"sweet pie," "honeybunch," "cutie patootie"
he's so genuine it's impossible not to grab his cheeks and smile
loves holding hands—it makes him feel safe and connected to you
like stan, he'll swing your arms as you walk, grinning ear to ear
will apologize profusely for the tiniest things, even if it's not his fault
"oh, gosh, i’m sorry! did I step on your toe?"
keeps a running list of all your favorite things so he can surprise you with thoughtful gifts or dates!
if you're upset, he'll bake you cookies or cupcakes and sit with you until you feel better
"it's okay to cry, you know. i'm here."
absolutely adores cuddling, but gets super shy at first
once he's comfortable, he's wrapping you in the coziest of hugs
brings you flowers he picked from the campus quad, tied with a little ribbon
"i hope you like ‘em! i thought they were real purdy."
gets starry-eyed whenever you talk about your dreams or passions
he's your biggest cheerleader and believes you can do anything!
definitely giggles as you try to kiss all over his face
allows you to paint his nails, so you both can match
kisses your scratches/bruises whenever you get hurt, then patches you up himself
takes candid photos of you, so he'll always remember the feeling of moments with you <3
NSFW
don't let this man fool you...
he'll act all nervous and shy at first
he'll blush bright red when you undress in front of him
he'll nervously kiss every inch of your skin, murmuring soft compliments as he goes
he'll shyly ask, "is it okay if i touch you there?"
like he's not about to have you begging for him to keep going
once he realizes how much you're into it, he flips a switch
suddenly his shy little kisses turn into biting your lip
pinning you down
murmuring in a low voice, "i'll take care of you, baby"
he'll start slow, watching you squirm under his touch
but he's secretly enjoying the power of making you lose control
SLEEPER AGENT OF KINK
you think he's all soft neck kisses and hand-holding
then he's tugging your hair, love bites on your shoulder
and growling in your ear, "you like that, don't you?"
his hands, his mouth, and his cock alternate between gentle and rough to keep you on edge <3
the moans he'll let out would be so loud and unrestrained
completely enamored with your body
big fan of overstimulation
thrives on praise
eager to learn as well!!
positions where he can see everything—your expressions, your body, the way you react to his touch—drive him wild
not afraid to try something new!
and when it's all over, he's right back to his soft and sweet self
kissing your forehead and pulling you into his arms like he wasn't doing unspeakable things to you five minutes ago.
can you still guess who my favorite is... 💀 also i'm so sorry for whatever this was
#south park x reader#south park x y/n#south park main four#south park college au#stan marsh x reader#kyle broflovski x reader#kenny mccormick x reader#eric cartman x reader#butters stotch x reader#south park#sp college au#south park headcanons
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If you hate Donald Trump and Elon Musk like I do, I need your advice, please read this
Red text - Why I hate them
Blue text - My problem
Green text - Why it's a problem/why I need advice
Genuinely, do I even really have to explain why I hate Trump? Is it not ovious enough? He is one of the most evil people ever known and there is NO SUCH THING as a "good trump supporter". THEY'RE ALL BAD. He is openly a misogynist and talks about women so poorly. He talks about them like they're s-x objects and says that women deserve punishment if they get abortions. He's been accused of SA by DOZENS, literally DOZENS of women. He even sexualises his own daughter and says that he would date her if they weren't related. Furthermore, he's cheated on all of his wives.
And what else? He is racist. Straight up, he is literally just racist. AND transphobic. He also openly admires dictators and said that he wants to become one himself. He said that he wants an army just like (Germany mustache guy)'s. He has a friend called Nicholas Fuentes who also has openly said that he admires (Germany mustache guy), is a Holocaust denier and said, I quote, "your body, my choice" and "there will never be a female president". Trump has unfair tax policies that only benefit rich people and fuck over the middle and lower class. I struggle to explain this and why it upsets me to my parents because my parents don't care about politics or understand me as a person. Even if they did they wouldn't have the same views as me. They're conservative and I'm alternative.
So my problem is that my Mother says that all politicians are narcissists. I tried to reason with her and explain that politicians might just be people who stand for something and want to make change. She said that all politicians are power hungry and all they want is money and fame. I told her that I was passionate about politics and I cared about it a lot. She said that I shouldn't care about politics. I tested her standards and told her "what if I want to work in politics? Does that make ME a narcissist? Or does it not apply to me because I'm your child?" My Mum said that I would never make it as a politician because I'm too soft.
My Dad on the other hand, has bought a tesla, for multiple reasons. Firstly because they're good for the environment, and also because he liked the car's design/functions and he liked that he didn't have to pay for gas. I have begged my parents multiple times to not take me anywhere in that car (we have other cars). My Dad asked me to explain why and I told him that it went against my beliefs to go in the car. The company of tesla is partially owned by Elon Musk who is the richest man in the world and oh my God he is an ASSHOLE. He has so much fucking money that he doesn't even need and once he literally prevented money from being donated to a charity for children's cancer. He is the definition of a priviledged asshole. And of course he's a fucking Trump supporter. My parents believe that I'm being unreasonable but I don't think they understand how much it truly upsets me. At this point, it's not even political opinions, it's a political fact. I don't support Donald or Elon, I never have, and I never will. It is not justifiable to support them.
I need your advice because my Mum has continuously forced me to get in that car and take me places with it, like school, my art club, to town or literally just anywhere. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of people seeing me get out of it at school. It's embarassing. My parents don't understand. My Dad said that if I don't want to get in the tesla then I can just stop going to art club and other places. He asked me to explain why I hated the tesla and I told him it was difficult to explain.
What if people at my school think I'm a trump supporter? Look, I'm always one who doesn't care what other people think, but that's only if I'M BEING AUTHENTIC AND MY TRUE SELF. That tesla is not me, it's not my thing and it never will be. I hate going in that car. I hate its size, I hate its design, I hate its company, I hate everything about it. I'm sick of worrying that my friends and classmates think I'm a priviledged asshole. I wish my parents had a sense of reality and would just understand this.
Please, if you have any kind of solution, tell me. And don't say something like "Oh just try explaining to your parents how you feel and why you're uncomfortbale". DUDE I'VE TRIED THAT 9892423 TIMESSS. THEY WON'T LISTEN. THEY DON'T GET IT.
Who can I call? Who can I reach out to? Who can I ask for help? WTF DO I DO???!?!
That's all! Thanks for reading
#donald trump#trump#fuck trump#trump 2024#fuck elon#elon musk#important#important post#hear me out#help#please help#please help me#pls help#what do i do#politics#us politics#american politics
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Can we have more film club updates? That was amazing and I’m proud of you!!!!
Well you remember how my friend was also at film club? She and I hung out on Christmas Day. We went to my sister's house for lunch. We played with my niece, nephew, and mother in a tent and then went to Nosferatu. My friend has been closer to the film club asshat than I have and asked if I wanted to see his text to her about The Incident, but warned me it was bad. Since nothing he said to my face about mental illness upset me because duh, not a shred of truth to it--- actually what he said about me in the text upset me. He tried to convince my friend that I was venting narcissistic rage at him the entire 45 minutes before he ran his mouth off and I stormed out. He said I am, in fact, a toxic narcissist who is in active addiction, not recovery, and I'm trying to lure my friend into a codependent relationship. It got to me. Such a reality warping piece of gaslighting. I had therapy today and talked about it. It triggered a lot of trauma. The doctor and I talked about how my mother would mercilessly abuse me as a child and then when I was angry or upset she'd accuse me of bullying and abusing her. We also talked about how the man I was in love with all my 20s would come sleep in my bed 3 nights a week, hold me, give me shoulder massages, fuck me and then act like I should just know better when I wanted to be his girl. For 8 years he led me on that way and then beat the shit out of me. I talked with the doctor about how in my early 20s in the recession when the unemployment rate for my demographic was over 50% I had a small job filling bottles with supplements for $9/hr and how the gagillionaire CEO dressed me down within 30 seconds of meeting me: told me I was fat, depressed, and obviously hadn't gotten laid recently. When I said that wasn't true he said, "Well it wasn't as good as you wanted it to be, was it?" We talked about how I was minding my business on the train home from work just after Christmas 2019 when a completely random woman pepper sprayed me in the face and just stepped off the train. I possess a deep fear that somehow I am marked out for cruelty. Greg, the film club asshat, tipped his hand by calling me a narcissist. He's a narcissist. He's the one who doesn't give a damn about people and tries to warp reality so he appears a victim. Even though I knew it wasn't true when I got home from Nosferatu I was taking internet tests to see if I have empathy, signs you're a narcissist, googling "what is active addiction." Am I hurting people and I don't realize it? When I think people think I'm smart and funny am I just being completely delusional? Am I making a fool of myself? No, I'm not any of those things. But it hurt me because I just have this sense that there's something wrong with me. Something that repulses people, makes them hate me. Even strangers can pick me out of a crowd. Is it because I'm ugly? Is it because I move my body strange? Is it because they read neurodivergence on me? It feels like my fault. I've always felt that way. Like if I could just fix myself and be good enough that I could stop the abuse and have friends and hobbies and a safe place for myself. I've never been safe in my whole life and it gets to me. It's like how I feel trapped by mental illness. I try as hard as I can and it will never leave me. It's as if I'm in an abusive relationship with life itself. I was marked out at birth by my abusive parents and biology. I can take comfort that I'm a better person than all these abusers---but I still lose. I lost that job filling bottles. I lost the love of my youth. Now I lost the film club, too, something which I felt proud of. I said, "See? I can go out into the city and find friends. When I talk to people they see I'm smart and funny and they like me."
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What if we rewrite Madara as a hero?
We know in Naruto, most villains aren't born this way, they are often the product of their environment and also the consequence of solitude when dealing with hardships.
Kakashi was on the verge of falling in the dark side but was saved by Hiruzen. Oroshimaru was an orphan of war that developed a nihilist vision of life and absence of moral in his scientific approach. Pain is the consequence of forever war in the Rain village, the lost of his family and his friend. Gaara the absence of love, Sasuke also became briefly mean due to his hate for Itachi and later his hate for the village.
Madara shippuden
Alright so how can we rewrite Madara in order that he doesn't fall for the dark path, while keeping most elements of his life :
If you have read my serie Yin/ Yang part 1 and part 2 you know that Naruto as the MC is strongly a Yang shinobi. Naruto's mind never change. he's always the same exuberant, strong-will and stubborn character. His challenge during the whole manga is to become physically stronger. He started as doing poorly in ninjutsu, learnt by himself shadow clone technique, rasengan, to control Kyubi, to work as a friend with kyubi.
If Madara was the main character in a series centred during the warring state era, he would have Yin-type of challenge to face. His power is through dream, vision, imagination. In other world the main goal of Madara should have been to develop a power capable of changing people's heart rather than change people into becoming evil cf Obito or forcing people living inside a illusion. It's so real that Madara stated himself when he was young.
In other words what he's saying : how can we trust others? how can we be sincere and be friend with former enemies?
Have you noticed that most Yin shinobi (with Obito being the exception) don't struggle to become powerful physically. Their strength grow steadily with training and discipline. Itachi, Sasuke, or Madara, They excel at school, smart and learn techniques with time and creativity. They're downfall is... their mental instability (*Tobirama entering the chat*). The problem isn't how to get stronger but how to keep a sane mindset in order to use this power for good.
1/ Face your fear
The main obstacle for Madara achieving this is to confront his fears. He is scared of trusting people behind him and this phobia is manifested by his susanoo with two faces and four arms. It can be understand in many way, the back is the most vulnerable part of the body. It would be interesting to know if in his early childhood he has been betrayed in his back which has caused this phobia. He also doesn't trust future generation, he doesn't think they can come with better idea than him. This is a feeling that he shared with Indra : Him, alone can solve the world's problems. Obito for instance was supposed to follow a path already thought through by Madara. He despised so much others than even when he gives his plan to Obito he needs to do it in his name. That's an extreme side of egoism. "Only me can achieve this dream and I'm gonna divide myself in other me (Obito, Black Zetsu) to finish the job."
So obviously to glow up as a hero he needs to confront his fear, having children and students
2/ Accept failure & learn resilience
One of the hardest part for Madara was accepting death. I personally don't think Izuna was the only people he lost in his life, but Izuna is certainly the straw that broke the camel's back. His brother was special because he was the last one and a promise he made to himself to keep him alive. The main reason of Madara's spiralling in despair was the absence of any support (Izuna was mostly holding this role)
to rewrite we might need to invent a new character that can be this new emotional support during this moment. When Naruto is about to fall Hinata is the one bring him back. I'm thinking about a moment in Jujutsu Kaisen, the MC Yuji has lost many people he cared in a short amount of time and he's in the verge to fall apart until Todo gave him the blablajustu of his life and it works!
So this brand new character can be a friend from his clan who still trust him or a girlfriend/spouse even his mother! In my opinion a woman will perfectly do the job. Because women force men to channel their ambition into something realistic : Yes you want to conquer the world but can you pay the bills? Can you feed your child? Can you protect me? Can you built our house? Are you seriously gonna blow up Konoha and abandon your family? Also intimacy with a woman is generally the rare moment where a man fall the mask of the tough guy. It's socially more acceptable for a woman to show vulnerability but generally frown upon for men. So yeah relationship with the opposite gender is important to give them the security to express their vulnerable side. And Madara is known for his gigantic ego, I think he deserves to have in this rewriting a partner that let him fall the armour and just be himself, just be a man. Who knows, in his private garden maybe Madara is a poet and read romcom?
To illustrate the importance of women I remember Mikoto revealing to Sasuke that his father is actually his secret biggest fan.
Anyway it needs to be someone with a strong emotional wisdom able to tell him : "yes you lost Izuna and you're experiencing your biggest failure. But you can't give up now because it means all those people you loved has sacrifice their life for nothing. I believe in you, you can surpass this challenge and keep going to honour your people."
3/Don't leave Konoha... or partially but come back stronger
Ok I know weird coming from me who never defend Konoha. But if Madara is written as the hero he can't completely abandon the village.
Also contrary to other character like Sasuke : Madara is one of the founder! He's not a 12 years old and an orphan. At this period he was between 25 to 30 years old (Izuna died at 24 for reference), unpopular sure but still a well-known, experienced shinobi and powerful head of clan. He had way more leverage to influence the village than Sasuke. The village wasn't yet the strong institution and the children killer machine it would become later on. He might leave it for a while in order to improve his skills. but he has to come back to confront...Tobirama. Leaving was literally giving free hands to the Senju to build Konoha with this generational paranoia mindset toward the Uchihas. If someone should have use all his Yin power to change relationship between Senju and Uchiha it should have been Madara but he run away from his duty. Yes Tobirama is Hashirama's brother AND Izuna's murderer. But how many orphans and widows Madara himself did he create? All shinobis including Hashirama has blood on their hands. It's hard, but as a hero he has to find a way to solve this conflict.
The infinite Tsukuyomi is escapism. Reality is too hard so better live in a dream. Madara said he can see the shadow taking over the village well that is his role as someone understanding well the Yin side of chakra to prevent it. Hashirama doesn't listen to you? find an other way inside the village! And this moment was illustrated by Onoki's flashback the previous tsuchikage about not giving up his will in front of challenge. It also applied to Madara's mindset toward Hashirama. At some moment Madara became resentful rather than finding a different perspective to change the village's mindset.
Izuna's death is also the opportunity for being accountable of his own failure. Why is he misunderstood by his clansmen? Why is he hated by those in the village that he wanted to protect? If anyone has read the manga Viking, the season 2 covered something similar. the hero was first introduce has a fierce warrior motivated by vengeance, in season 2 he lost his goal and became the shadow of who he was but during this introspection he confronts his demons and came back with a new vision of the world. Why not introduce a new villain that can be confronted only by someone with a mastery of Yin release (in order to put Hashirama on the side and bring the Spotlight on Madara's power). Like the challenge that Pain was for Naruto. This new villain may force Madara to unlocked his power at a higher level. So this character must be someone mastering also Yin release. Similar to Naruto when he met Killer Bee that control Hashibi at a higher level. Since Madara is a dojutsu expert, I think of a Huyga villain for that role. Byakugan is the other greatest Dojutsu if we put aside Rinnegan. Byakugan vs Sharingan can be an insanely good fight!
4/ to put it in a nutshell
Madara has to stop being pee-shy for character's improvement
Find a partner so he won't feel alone and go crazy even in his darkest moments
having children and students could have been a good way to trust the new generation. I'm sure he would hate first having students like Kakashi in the beginning but later being the best teacher ( just look how he was the only one to see Obito's potential and made him someone even stronger than Itachi in short among of time. Being able to control Kyubi at 16 years old is incredible)
He should learn patience : yes it may take time to be valued in Konoha and as a Yin Shinobi it's his role to confront Tobirama and his bullshits.
Unlocked insane Yin release, become konoha's hero like Naruto after Pain.
Clarify the rumour that he stole his brother's eyes, just tell the truth: he gave it to you. Period. If someone ~Tobirama to not name him, disagrees he has to come fight him in the battlefield.
He could have then become the 2nd Hokage
If truly relationship has been pacify between Senju and Uchiha after a generation Konoha would have been so powerful that probably the shinobi world would have been unified with Konoha has the main power.
The World is now safer under Madara's hegemony. Black zetsu can't have any influence because he has no more weakness to exploit, Kaguya won't be awaken and the Otsutsuki won't look for her she's still sealed inside the moon and no need for Boruto to exist.
⋆꙳•❅‧₊⋆☃︎‧❆₊⋆The End.⋆꙳•❅‧₊⋆☃︎‧❆₊⋆
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I lowkey feel like a weirdo just reading and interacting with your posts without actually sending anything in the ask box LMAO
So here I am, to rant about pretty (not so) little twinks to my favorite writer
Everyone headcannons Hanma to be sadistic, and while I can definitely see that based on the way he acts and fights, I personally headcannon him to be a hardcore masochist who just tries to hide it by saying he's a sadist. Like this man doesn't dodge powerful punches and kicks from Mikey or Draken, no, no, he blocks them with his own body instead. His whole thing is always getting back up after tanking heavy hits like a monster. But he also very regularly eggs people on. He taunts and maims people to get them to fight him. He does this, every. Single. Fight.
So how does this translate into the bedroom? Well of course, his lanky ass wants nothing more than to get on your nerves. He wants to see how far he can push you, if he can make you genuinely mad. He wants to be the biggest little shit he possibly can until you have no choice but to punish him for it. And this boy can take a lot. Spanking? No problem. Choking? Yes please. Cbt? Why the hell not? Putting him into a borderline painful full nelson while relentless pounding into his prostate at mach jesus? He'd love every second, even if it renders him damn near bedridden for the next three days. Hell, we've seen how Hanma fights, you could probably beat the shit out of him or try to kill him and he'd pop a stiffy.
I feel like he might have a humiliation kink too. Like- shame this man for being so kinky and mock him for being pathetic. You could call him your little bitch and spit in his mouth and he'd just grin in response. And he's not really the type to break easily either. Even as you have him clutching the sheets, trembling, tears rolling down his cheeks, barely even able to stay conscious, he'd still talk shit and try to aggravate you. That carries into every day couple life too, just in a more minor way. He likes to play pranks on you, poke and prod you both literally and metaphorically. He's also almost definitely smart, I mean- Kisaki hates dumb people, and he hangs out with Hanma. That just means that Hanma will start the dumbest, prettiest arguments, and win purely by technicality. He's a total smartass. Of course, Hanma wouldn't say or do anything to actually hurt you, he's just be annoying and a nusience on purpose because he finds it entertaining to piss people off. It's alright, there's an easy fix. Just fuck hin so dumb he can't talk, so hard that he just passed out in your arms straight after.
Moral of the story, Hanma is a freaky little masochist, and the world's most annoying little asshole (affectionate)
~Neon
(Ajdksj no need to worry! I accept lurkers of all sorts — including lurkers who don't interact at all, and instead silently read my works <3
I do appreciate things like this too though, thank you! I love hearing y'all's thoughts and ideas!)
—
THIS is canon, as far as I'm concerned. He's such a painslut, it's not even funny. I definitely agree that Shuji will do his best to annoy you, that's just his favorite past time :P
I recently learned that getting punched in the gut (or just, in general) is a kink/fetish, so I think we can safely assume that Shuji would be into that too. I know that wrestling is also a sexual thing for some people. Just tossing that out there. Pin that tall boy in a painful position and hammer your cock into him, he'll love it!
Forget play fighting, he's the kind of guy who'd want to actually fight you until he's spitting up blood. Rasping a snarky remark even as his knuckles are busted, and his ribs ache from your heavy hits. Just normal couple things~
I also just thought about a "softer" moment: Cuddling with Shuji and pressing on the bruises you left on him. He winces as your thumb presses down on the large purple area on his arm, your other hand combing through his hair. This kind of pain is the kind that makes his whole body tremble, and he easily becomes addicted to it <3
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#Can't stop thinking about what it would be like if I wasn't disabled#What things could I achieve if I got my old body back?#But I also hate that I'm thinking that because this was always my body#I just didn't feel the same level of pain as I do now#This is my body and it always has been and I feel bad for hating it because it can't do everything I want it to#My neighbor's kids are sweet and wonderful and happy- they don't worry about doing something wrong#I can't remember ever feeling like that#Instead I remember crying into my comforter to stay quiet because we would get in trouble for crying too much#I'm scared that stuff might have messed me up permanently#I don't know how you're actually supposed to treat kids because all I know is that#you're not supposed to treat them the way I was treated#I don't want to talk to the psychologist about it because I don't want to have to talk about#the ways my parents were mean to me but we keep talking around it#I guess it feels like I’m betraying them#I've realized that of everything that worries me or scares me it's all either#being afraid of permanence or being afraid of uncertainty. It's like there's no winning.#I don't know why I can't just accept that bad things happen sometimes and learn to cope.#I don't think I realized how much having a disability get progressively worse without any sort of#support system impacted my mental health and I don't know what to do about it#I don't want to see a therapist but I'm getting the feeling more and more that I should and that scares me.
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'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.
I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.
About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'
-Casey Plett, Consciousness
#this quote always moves me almost to tears when i remember it#i'm not a trans woman and i don't share the author's specific experiences with transition#but it really moves me that she frame transition as joyfully giving yourself permission to approach your body#not as something that has to be disciplined and deprived and made small in all these various ways#but as a means for experiencing pleasure and joy and delight and for insisting that our feelings and desires are worth#valuing and exploring and treasuring#i always used to think of prioritizing those things for myself as selfish and irresponsible#but who does it harm to want to experience pleasure in your own body?#it's such a beautifully simple and powerful switch to have flip in your head#and equally why are we forced to deny our own pleasure in transition and anything else related to our bodies in the name of moral rectitude#this is why i get so confused and pissed off when other trans people are fatphobic for example#like why are you so invested in politics of shame and disgust that never had any purpose other than#violently disciplining people as if they've violated moral codes by existing in a body#to say nothing of white people being racist in gay and trans communities#like again this system of violence is foundational to homophobia and transphobia#so why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you#even if you are unmoved by the urgency of other people's suffering which btw you should be moved by#what do you hope to gain by acting a collaborator and handmaiden to those systems#Casey Plett#she really is one of my favorite authors i wish more non-canadians read her#this quote is from a series of columns she did ont transition and every single one is a banger#i love when she talks about the people-pleasing elements of dysphoria and transition denial#she's so sharp about noting how many of us deny our own dysphoria on the grounds that others like and validate our bodies#that's how i always felt during my cis conventionally feminine era#it pleased other people so much and also that reception felt so hollow and joyless to me because i hated it#i get less of that positive feedback but that feels so unimportant next to the joy and pleasure i get to experience#said with the understanding that i'm very privileged in being able to prioritize those things without fear. but it was a switch flip#personal nonsense
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finished mother 3 for the first time last week so here's my take on a claus lives au
#thinking abt the irreversible damage done to claus' body and how much he must have suffered... :[#he's alive yes but many of his days are spent in discomfort...#only the pigmasks could give him the accommodations he needed to power through. but now he's without all of that. he has to live with it now#he's always freezing because of how much steel is in his body#that old jacket is the only thing that brings him any sort of warmth despite how much he hates it#this is a general hc but lucas went mute during the 3 years due to not really having anyone to talk to#it's also why he didn't learn much sign :')#i was in a lot of bodily pain the other day so of course i gave it to claus#mother#mother series#mother 3#mother 3 fanart#mother 3 art#mother 3 spoilers#lucas mother 3#claus mother 3#mother 3 au#kinda wanted to draw more of this before i posted it but whatever i've been rotating this game around in my brain for so long . i'm so ill
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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On the topic of hormones, I love trans men, transmasculine people, abinary, multigender people, or whomever else who takes estrogen and trans women, transfeminine, abinary, multigender people, or whomever else who takes testosterone.
There is no "right" way to transition. You don't have to be a perfectly binary, gender conforming trans person in order to take hormones. We all have different levels of estrogen and testosterone, and that means women and nonbinary people don't have to have estrogen-dominant systems and men and nonbinary people don't have to have testosterone-dominant systems. Do what sparks joy and if it's shit, hit the bricks!
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#i think people who take 'nonconforming' hormones for their gender are so cool 👍#and it's made me so much more comfortable in my own relationship with hormones and my body and how my identity plays into it#because my sense of self is nuanced but i was always under pressure to think 'i'm a man so i can ONLY have testosterone in my system'#and that's shitty because at that point i couldn't transition medically and i felt like less of a man#but the people who are so commited to breaking gender apart with their teeth have made me so much more comfortable#i wish somebody could have been there to tell me my hormones didn't dictate my entire sense of if i'm a 'real man' though#also this isn't an attack on trans men/masc people taking testosterone and the inverse for estrogen#sometimes i see people reading way too into these posts and assuming that the OP is saying they hate 'conforming' trans people#(i'm a trans man* who is transitioning 'conformingly' if anybody is thinking the tags previously are true)#(also i am very content being a trans man who takes testosterone so my gender doesn't feel threatened when a trans man takes E y'know?)#(you don't have to understand it but you DO have to treat them like human beings who have bodily autonomy)
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*Trigger warning for eating disorder talk*
I hate how whenever I eat anything my brain is like "You should kill yourself. Now." Like what's your fucking problem
#tw ed#it's like bitch the body needs nutrients to function. idiot. that's how flesh vessels work. what are you an alien?#but my brain is always like 'booo you are a disgusting ugly bitch and as a punishment you can't eat at all tomorrow.'#like...ok then. i guess.#the funny thing is that it's also like two people fighting because like i hate what i see in the mirror from both sides#like one part of me is like 'ahhh we are far too skeletal it looks kinda creepy and Not Good'#and the other is like 'wow ew we're so disgusting and big and our bones aren't visible enough. what would our family say?'#so there's like no winning at all because if i don't eat one side will get mad and refuse to look in the mirror#and if i do eat the other side will go into total hysterics and I'll have to sleep completely covered up and will have to avoid#all mirrors because it will completely distort our perception of ourselves and will claim changes that aren't there and it will#force me not to eat for a day or two and probably also to walk everywhere#it also sucks because i think not eating enough might be contributing to me feeling so shallow and fatigued and disinterested in everything#but i have no idea because I don't know how many calories I'm actually getting#and it's really Bad™ for me to count because I'm a little bit too competitive and my brain has historically always made it#a challenge to eat as few calories as possible. because I'm insane and treat literally everything as a competition that i have to win
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one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.
canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.
#( ooc. ) OUT OF CIGS.#i'm doing page maintenance before i fuck off to work rip it's got me thinking#anyway i think i said WAY back on this blog that a side goal of mine is to make hellblazer lore accessible to non-comic readers where i can#bc it's such a Heavy comic & i love it so much & i always felt Terrible recommending it to people only for them to be disgusted#and like. @ past me that particular goal is NOT as easy as you thought it would be lmao#esp because i have a habit of getting VERY detail-oriented when it comes to talking about hellblazer i think#but by GOD it's still a goal. i can put in some motherfucking references here and there when i talk about The Lore#like. azzarello's writing style never translates well for me in synopsis bc he Loves to put the audience in the outside perspective#where we are bystanders/with the rest of the bystanders to constantine's actions and not to his motivations/inner monologue#and i HATE that. hellblazer has ALWAYS been about what this guy has going on underneath the masked exterior#all the things you can't say out loud when you're queer and working class trying to survive in 70s-80s-90s england#but that you FEEL with your WHOLE fucking chest. how that feeling drives you to enjoy little rebellions wherever you can get them#(also azzarello just fucking Sucks LMAO but i'm talking style rn)#so i end up relying on frusin's art to tell the story a little more bc i think he understands the Theatre of constantine's public persona#and when that theatre is Absent then it's really REALLY noticeable. so frusin keeps me in it most of the time#and if i'm digging into frusin art then i'm Going to want to compare it to older panels bc i like body language consistency#milligan on the other hand has NOTHING to save his sorry ass bc his writing is drop-jaw fucking terrible AND the artist seems to like it#but the loss of john's thumb being tied to his mental health (ignoring the bullshit with shade) has always felt. important to me somehow id#anyway MUCH thinking about my favorite loser on this about-to-be-annoying day shdjksd he has been done so dirty#hellblazer brain go brrrr
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I've been thinking and dreaming so much about death its mildly concerning
#rainy talks#rainy vents#my cousin should be 29 instead we're fast approaching the 14 year anniversary of her death#my moms been dead fo 15 she died in her forties and I know circumstances are different because she had like#8 kids + several miscarriages and her dad also died relatively young#my grandma[the one I liked] died with 2 different types of cancers in her body#and all my dreams lately involve people dying#not anyone I know but like randos#and I wonder if thats because of semi guy#qnd then i always worry about my siblings between the alcoholism and the surgeries and the traveling all the time#i don't want to one day say “yeah I have six living siblings and one dead”#i don't want to be the one that they say that about#i don't want my dad to die or my grandpa or even my cousins that I hate#I'm so tired of thinking about people dying
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why does school make me so tired?? i don't have the energy to do anything afterwards . it's not fair i want to draw and write but i can't
#it's probably because it starts so early and my body doesn't naturally let me fall asleep and wake up that early#so i usually get like 4-6 hours of sleep on school nights#and i don't have time to make good/enough food so im always hungry#and i hate the school bathrooms so i dont drink water until i get home#it seems counterproductive to make school this draining when they also expect us to do homework#i'm not doing fucking homework i'm too tired to move or think#i would drop out but i like like 3 of my classes and i don't want to miss out on those
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I would like to go one day without feeling self conscious :(
#like i just. i'm fine!! mostly#but still i end up Anxious#they sure weren't lying that anxiety sure is disordered#idk i just think it's kinda messed up how apparently my anxiety's so bad i should potentially be on medication for it but it gets downplayed#this isn't really meant to be a vent vent i am just frustrated that i am genuinely almost always anxious to some degree#really hate when people take a “it's just anxiety” stance like sorry but it's not “just” anxiety#my ability to function in everyday life is affected severely#if i am not at college because its the holidays then it's a miracle if i leave the house more than once a week#sometimes it's a miracle if i actually leave the house at all#because my body seems to be constantly under the impression that i am about to be in danger#on multiple occasions it has tipped over into full-blown paranoia where i think everyone i see may be out to get me somehow#and that everyone i care about is just secretly waiting for the perfect opportunity to hurt me for their amusement#so yeah i kinda hate when people act like anxiety disorders are the “easy” mental illnesses because anxiety has controlled most of my life#the whole fearful-avoidant disorganised attachment thing i've got going on is fed into by my anxiety whilst also fueling my anxiety as well#the self awareness of it all is a really annoying thing too because. i know my anxiety is an irrational thing! i just can't do much about it#i try and i try but sometimes i just can't always win against my anxiety
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everytime friends complain to me about dating or i read stuff about it online it's just a circus of miscommunication... how can you like somebody enough to date or sleep with them and not be able to talk with them like a normal person. i think going on dates with ppl you don't know that well sounds kinda fun but not if there's a million unspoken rules around it.
#like i genuinely dont get how ppl end up dating someone before becoming close friends#especially if they have a whole code of etiquette around it#it's always like... it's just Being Friends or the process of becoming friends or it's some weird shit i don't get#or when ppl in a relationship hate each other#i get why friends will stay friends with resentment but at a certain point when you hate being around someone#and unlike most friendships r capable of just not having to be around that person anymore#why bother... it sounds tirint#idk. i think im aromantic it's just not like super important right now. im 19 so it's just not a focus#when I'm like 30 ill start worrying about whether i should be trying to find love. or it'll happen on its own by then#but damn it's just like#idk everyone i know whos dating/dated had mostly bad experiences#which ik is also because of my age i mean hs and college students r not known for their great interpersonal skills#but it is kinda like what is the point of all that... get a body pillow and weighted blanket and move on
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