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dancingwithreality · 1 year ago

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an idea p.g.10 part.2

gif not mine!

pairings: pierre gasly x fem!reader; friends to lovers

word count: 4.68k

summary: feelings are springing up everywhere, and suddenly your friendship doesnt really feel like just a friendship anymore.

a/n: very poorly translated french please bear with me, yes i referenced a song because its currently (and constantly) playing in my mind. reader is french btw dont know if it was obvious with the whole childhood friends thing but just wanted to state it. not betaread so if theres any typos, english isnt my first language and i wrote this only at night so, good luck.

please do not take my work! enjoy and interact!

YOU STOOD IN FRONT of his door as he leaned against the frame, you didn't really know what to say right away, clearly not thinking enough before acting.

'Hey,' you started but completely lost all words, what were you doing here?

'Everything okay?' Pierre tilted his head to the right, looking at you inquisitively.

'Yeah, yeah! Just uh, tired.' You tried not to look at him too hard, lest you start bumbling like an idiot.

'Wanna come in for a nightcap?' he shifted his weight to expose more of the opening to his room, simply inviting you in.

'You sure?' If you were being honest with yourself, you didn't know if you wanted to go in or not.

'Wouldn't have opened the door if I didn't want you in, chérie,' normally, you would have laughed at his words 'want you in' but you didn't think it was appropriate in your predicament.

You walked in and wondered if he'd always called you that, and if his clothes were always that tight. You'd sat down on the edge of his bed, you still kept closely to yourself.

'Are you absolutely sure you're okay?' He sat down next to you, arms elbows resting on his knees while he kept his head turned to see you.

His gaze felt heavy, but it was still as soft as it normally was. Not pressuring you, not bored, not uninterested, but patient and understanding. It would be hard not spilling everything in your mind to him right there and then.

'Just worried about quali, that's all.' you lied. You hated lying to Pierre.

'Oh chérie,' He sat up and wrapped his arms around you in a comforting manor. 'Silverstone can be dangerous but I'll be okay, love.'

What was up with him and the pet names? But still, you sat there in his embrace and let yourself decompress. His arms were always so warm, like a bed bathed in soft sunlight and your body heat from the night before. Like it would be cold if you got out.

'Can- can we stay like this?' You didn't want to be cold.

'We can stay as long as you want,' his voice was soft in your ear, pressing a soft kiss to your head.

And you did stay, just like that, all night. That was, until Pierre's alarm rang and disrupted the calm. Somewhere along the night you'd ended up laying down still in his arms. Somewhere along the night, you'd ended up as tangled up in blankets as you were with him.

Your head was against his chest and on top of his arm. Just as his other arm was wrapped around your waist, so was yours around his, and you didn't know where his legs started and where yours ended.

With your hand that was previously clutching his shirt you reached to rub your eyes of the sleep keeping them closed. His breath was lightly fanning your face as your eyes grew wide and your face grew hot at the proximity. By some grace, he'd awoken just then, shifting his position and rubbing his legs on yours.

'Hm, morning.' He groaned in your ears, his voice low and husky.

'Good morning,' this time it was your voice that cracked making you inwardly wince at the sound. 'Gotta get ready for quali, yeah?' You cleared your throat and slipped right out from under his hold.

'Yeah,' he was looking at you a certain way and his gaze felt heavy. 'I'll stop by in 50 and we can head out?'

'Oh uh, no you can go ahead I'll catch up later.' You waved your hands and head around in a dismissing manor. Shit, what if he worries? Every time you could make it to a race, you and Pierre always went to every practice, qualifying, and race together. This change in behavior made you think he might worry but you hoped he wouldn't.

'Alright chérie, I'll see you then.' He smiled softly went off into his bathroom yelling, 'Lock the door on your way out!'

•••

While you were panicking in our own room, trying to act like a normal person and decide what to wear, Pierre was kicking himself in his room. Lock the door on your way out?? What was he, an idiot? Pierre always payed such close attention to you he could notice even the slightest of changes. And from the day before, every one of your actions was off, so long as it involved him.

As you could probably imagine, this made him freak out internally, Was he making you uncomfortable? Did he do something? Or worse, did you find out about his feelings and now you didn't know how to act around him? He stared at himself in the mirror as tried to calm himself down.

The smell of your lilac and gooseberry perfume lingered on his clothes, wafting up into his nose. How could someone and all things about them cloud his mind so much, yet bring such peace and calm?

When you said those five simple words, he swore his heart did backflips. All worry went out the window the second you wrapped your arms around him. How could he say no? The feeling of falling asleep with you and waking up with you so close made him feel so warm. Like the setting sun in an open field of flowers and tall grass.

He couldn't keep thinking about this, he had to get ready. The sweet smell on his shirt was too precious to lose so he folded the shirt carefully and placed it on his pillow. If the shirt didn't smell like you when he came back, at least his pillow would.

On the way to Silverstone one of your favorite songs started playing, and it was just another reminder of you. Maria by Blondie. Event the lyrics were fitting.

Oh how you find so many ways to plague his very being.

•••

You've been doing this for years, showing up to races and everything, so everyone was used to seeing you in the garage. Granted Alpine was surprised at first. You weren't family, you weren't dating Pierre, but normally friends stayed in hospitality. Though soon enough you were a welcomed presence and dearly missed when you weren't there.

You were sat next to Pyry anxiously watching qualifying. Pierre was doing well, Charles even better. Though you were probably just watching to watch. You'd lost yourself in your thoughts and were absolutely absent minded. The mind could be a tricky place when you're dealing with unknown feelings and sudden unknown territory. You were out of your field of expertise with Pierre now. What were you supposed to do?

'Hey?' Pyry knocked his shoulder on yours to get your attention.

'Sorry, what'd you say?' You shook your head and came back to the real world.

'You've been really distracted huh?' He tilted his head accusingly, 'You and Pierre.'

'I'm sorry?'

'Somethings going on with you two.'

'What is with everybody and being so preceptive?' You groaned and put your head in your hands. 'Is everyone a psychic or something?'

'No we have eyes.' He retorted. 'It's painfully obvious. He's never been more distracted, and you're usually his rock and you're a wreck.'

'Thank you so much, that's exactly what I want to hear.' You gave him a dead stare.

'Love is a messy thing. But it's not something you let pass you by, its probably the best opportunity you'll ever have. Especially one like yours and Pierre's,' he started tapping the side of his head. 'Trust me.'

Who knew a trainer could have such wisdom? You for sure didn't. 'That's.. actually really sweet. And smart.' You bumped Pyry's shoulder with yours. 'Thanks.'

'Yeah, I know,' he laughs and shrugs before crossing his arms and adjusting his posture.

The best opportunity you'll ever have.

•••

You'd been having a fun night with Pierre and Charles. They wanted to relax and prepare before Silverstone so you were all in your hotel room. You'd brought your neck massager with you and Charles was sitting with his arms in the handles and head leaned back. The boys were communicating back and forth, Cha giving Pierre advice for the (high) midfield and Pierre giving Cha his thoughts for making his way up to the podium.

You were leaning against Charles with your legs in Pierre's lap when they pulled you into the conversation. 'Chérie, what do you think?' Pierre asked, his hands tracing gently up and down your legs.

'Uh,' his touch was distracting. 'Honestly, I wasn't really paying attention much today.'

'Interesting,' Charles mumbled, earning an elbow to the stomach.

'By what?' Pierre turned his attention towards you but his hands didn't leave you.

'A thrilling conversation with Pyry.' You exhaled.

'On?' Charles dragged the word out and wiggled his eyebrows.

Here was when you noticed Pierre stopped. He was nearly frozen solid, hands mid-air. Why were you talking to Pyry? His trainer? And why was it thrilling? He cleared his throat, 'Uh, about what?'

'He was, helping me with a problem, unsolicited.'

Why was he helping you? What problem did you have? Why were you going to Pyry for it? Why didn't you tell him? Pierre's mind was running a mile a minute. Things were being so strange in your relationship he didn't know what was wrong. 'Did it, uh, help?'

His eyes met yours and there was something behind them he couldn't quite place. While a feeling of dread and worry was settling in his stomach, another was setting in yours.

One like yours and Pierre's, was running through your head. You did kind of already act like a couple. But you'd always been like that. Was there really a possibility of you two being more?

'Well obviously, if you didn't want whatever this thing is so badly, you wouldn't be looking for advice everywhere.' Charles spoke up, watching the tension rise between you two in different ways. He could see Pierre tense, and though it was a weird angle he could see the feelings right behind your eyes. The only question was if you'd notice it.

'Yeah..' You'd nearly whispered, a smile creeping its way onto your face. Yeah, maybe you did want it. So you reached over and rested your hand on Pierre's arm closest to you, thumb stroking his skin. 'You're gonna do great, I have no doubt.'

As if you were a beacon in the dark, you cleared his mind of any worried thoughts with a simple touch. His hands went back to your legs and that calm look back on his face. 'Thanks, mon amour.'

With a light blush on both of your faces, you fell into comfortable conversations. Sharing laughs, stress melting off all your shoulders.

Whatever they were talking about, you'd stopped listening. Right here in this moment you felt so content. What else could you want? Your best friend and the man who was taking over your heart. Peace and warmth spread over your body and you'd found yourself thinking. Dreaming, of a future with you and Pierre together across the couch from Charles. Pierre's arms around you and your body swallowed by his. Charles sat opposite you as the three of you laughed, the occasional tease at the new couple, and a domestic reality.

•••

Your biggest problem on race day was always what to wear. Two friends on teams with completely opposite color schemes how could you pick? So regularly you alternated. In Austria you wore a white tank with loose jeans, a Ferrari cap and matching windbreaker with matching New Balances.

This time, you decided to deck out in Alpine. You slipped on a pair of high waisted light washed jeans and went searching for your shirt. A few weeks ago you’d altered an Alpine polo, cropping it and cutting the sleeves off. The colors matched well with the dark blue paisley bandana and skillfully straightened hair. To top it off you had some retro Jordan 4s in a delicate pink. A light, clean, makeup look was all you could settle for as you checked your watch and saw the time pass by quicker than you’d thought.

Dainty gold jewelry covered you from earrings to actual rings, but careful not to go overload with it. A white leather handbag was the cherry on top as you packed your stuff and made sure to head so you could try and make it on time.

Unfortunately you barely made it, the formation lap having already started. You watched Charles slide easily into fourth and Pierre a few places behind him in eighth. You crossed your fingers and got ready to pray they both made it up in positions.

As the lights flashed and the cars started you were given a headset and stood with Esteban’s girlfriend watching on a monitor. It’s lights out and away we go, you thought as the cars took off and Lando overtook Max on the first corner. You could already tell this race was going to be interesting.

•••

Lap five and Max took back his first place spot. Predictable but you would miss those four laps of bliss with Lando leading.

•••

Lap ten and they were calling in Esteban which didn’t bode well in the garage. Elena had gone with his to his drivers room hoping to bring him some comfort. You were alone chewing on your lip now, hoping this would be all that happens this race.

•••

Lap thirty-three and things had been going good. Charles overtime both McLaren’s as he sat in second place. They were both doing well as Lando sat in third and Oscar defended both of their positions from fourth.

But suddenly K Mag crashed. They brought the car in and called a red flag to make sure the track was safe to continue racing on.

•••

A lap later, thirty-four, and Pierre made contact with Lance. Your heart stopped and you held your breath. Cars were spinning out as he made contact with Carlos just after. You crossed your fingers and kept your eyes glued to the screen and you saw them call Pierre in to box. The damage to all nearby cars called for another red flag.

They were cleaning up the Vale chicane and you watched them asses Pierre’s car. The damage to the right-rear suspension wasn’t all too bad as they managed to keep him out.

You thanked whatever power was listening that he was still in this.

•••

Lap fifty-one and by some stroke of luck Pierre was in sixth, basically tailgating George in front of him.

He was coming up on turn three, onto a DRS zone and you prayed that he would overtake. And thanks to the same power listening before, he overtook George and made distance between them bigger. Cheers were spread throughout the Alpine garage at this little victory.

And at the end of lap fifty-two, the end of the race, as the last car crossed the finish line, Charles in second and Pierre in fifth you’d never heard a garage celebrate louder. Granted until you heard McLaren.

Cars went back to their respective garages as you waited for Pierre to come out. You all knew the chances of Pierre crossing that finish line were slim. Damage to the suspension normally means retirement and a depressed driver. Yet how he managed to pull across that line and keep it going was something you couldn’t believe. And manage to pull through into fifth in an Alpine? You meant no malice though, no offense, just honest thoughts.

He pulls into the pit lane parking just outside the garage and hands his steering wheel to the crew member nearest and jumps out and onto his car. He through his hands up and screams in victory. Those ten points would be his saving grace and push him further in his career.

Pierre runs into the garage and gets picked up by every pit crew team member and thrown around by everyone. There was a joy in the air that was contagious. Your two favorite boys both in the highest spirits had you going nuts.

As soon as they let him down you made eye contact with him. The grin on your face was so wide you knew it was gonna hurt tomorrow. He lit up immediately and somehow his smile only got wider. The two of you started running towards each other as you collided in a tight hug.

Your arms wrapped so tight around his neck and his so tight around your waist they wrapped around completely. Chests pressed against the other you’d never felt so warm, so happy, so comfortable. The sweat from his neck was rubbing off on yours but you didn’t care. You’d have to shower after getting back to your room but you didn’t care.

The pure joy that radiated off both you was more important. His long fingers curling into your waist and pressing on your skin sent you into hyperdrive. In one quick motion, Pierre picked you up and started to spin still wrapped in the embrace. You threw your head back in laughter and your giggles filled the room. Eventually he set you down, and you two laughed as you pulled away, his hands on your waist and yours on his shoulders.

‘You did it mon amour!’ you could barely think straight as your threw your head back into his shoulder and placed a quick kiss to his cheek.

‘I did it!’ He cheered and threw his fists up into the air, the whole garage cheered with him. Pierre started thanking everyone in the garage, shaking hands and hugging them all. He gathered everyone around and started thanking the whole team, addressing them as a whole in a sort of victory speech. Even though we didn’t get on the podium and only one of our drivers made it across the finish line you would’ve thought we got pole with a 1-2 finish.

You stood further in the back admiring him as he continued to give his makeshift speech. That radiant smile on his face and the passion in his voice made you swoon. Maybe you did like him. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing. Maybe you were happy about it.

•••

When the boys wanted to go to the club, you were all for it. Lando wanted to celebrate his win, Pierre was on a high, and this race was just what Charles needed. You'd told them to go ahead without you and that you'd join them as soon as you were ready. You wanted to spend extra time getting dolled up because tonight was a special night.

You wore your best short skirt, a pale cream with an asymmetrical cut. You had on a long sleeve, sheer glittery pink shirt with a matching bikini style bra on underneath. You paired it with a small cream handbag and long laced up cream heels.

Your hair was styled in bouncy curls and your makeup done light but intense. If all things boded well tonight you would act on your newfound feelings. And if not, you'd blame it on the drink, even if you highly doubted it would end bad. After doing a once over in the mirror you dabbed some of your signature scent on with a light dose of the pheromone perfume everyone spoke so highly of.

So you called a cab and put on an extra coat of lip gloss to boost your confidence as you would need it tonight. Taking one of the deepest breaths you probably ever have, you put one foot in front of the other and walked into the club.

Head held high and heels clicking on the floor you walked over to the booths that had been reserved for the night. As soon as you sat you placed a drink order on the little screen at the table smiled to the two on your left.

'Hey boys,' You smiled wide and let out a little giggle at the end. 'Some of your best work out there today!'

Pierre was left stunned at the sight of you as soon as you walked in. Whenever you turned up, it didn't take long for his eyes to find you and when they did, wowza.

A simple look at you would melt him but when you looked at him? He would turn into a puddle, especially when you looked like that. It was like he fell in love with you for the second time.

'Who are you trying to impress?' Charles raised his eyebrows with a knowing smirk.

'No one,' you responded and for a second Pierre thought your eyes flew to his just before flying away. 'Anyway, tonight is about you guys and your stellar performance today!' As you finished your sentence the waiter walked up with your raspberry daiquiri and you thanked him as you took it.

One large sip later and you were all laughing and chatting. The three of you were sitting at the booth just talking and drinking for the most part, at least until the liquid courage was enough for you.

'That's it, i'm bored.' You set your now empty glass down and stood up smoothing out your skirt. 'Lets dance,' you stretched your hand out to Pierre and waited for him to grab it.

And hesitantly he did, though not before sending a glance to Charles. He was surprised at the force of your pull, dragging him towards whatever direction you wanted. 'Come on, amour!' You'd yelled over the music now using both hands to pull Pierre with you.

That was the second time you'd called him that today, and it made him flush red. You didn't know what you were doing to him and if it was cruel Pierre didn't care. You two had always been close. Closer than most normal friendships. From the pet names, to the physical touches, people would normally just assume you were dating anyway.

But you'd never called him amour, love. It was new and it was welcome and he would pay to hear it in your voice everyday. Pierre knew it was dangerous, dancing with you like this while thinking about you like that. With your bodies moving together and your faces nearly inches apart, it would take his whole willpower to stay away. To keep his hands off you.

Which contrary to his belief, it might've been just what you wanted. Begging him in your mind to just make a move, put his hands on your hips, drag you closer, stare into your eyes and push your hair behind your ear. So as soon as a waitress passed by you grabber her attention to ask for a few shots, hoping they would make at least one of you brave enough.

And as soon as the drinks got to you, you both took them, albeit Pierre was hesitant. But he still drank it and it definitely loosened you all up. Bodies got closer, hands nearly roaming the other, faces so close, it was a painful fate. The two of you so close yet so far. Whatever heavy gate kept kept you from crossing that line felt nearly impenetrable.

You cursed whatever twisted hands put you in this position. To give you these feelings for your lifelong best friend but forbid you from doing anything about it. You could think about it all later and just enjoy the moment, its all you're ever gonna get.

•••

Pierre got wasted. Something about the energy of the night made him go further than he normally does. Luckily, you didn't let yourself go and devoted your night to watching him.

So at roughly two you called it. He was nearly falling over so you huffed as you carried half his weight and dragged him to the hotel. 'You better be glad Hungary is in two weeks, you can sleep this off all you want,' You'd left the club maybe five minutes ago after begging Charles to pay your tabs, which he did.

It was hard to call a cab when you were focused on keeping Pierre on his feet. One hand was up, waving as you whistled trying to get ones attention and the other was around him. Luck was on your side once tonight, and that was when one pulled up before you toppled over. In a haste you opened the door and shoved him in. You climbed in after him and let the cab take you back to the hotel as you could rest your shoulder.

And as soon as you pulled up, payed the cabby, and shuffled out with Pierre hot on your tail, the struggle started again. Pulling him up to his room was a tough feat as he kept giggling and laughing about something. Combine that with whatever was making him stare at you and touch your face, with a look in his eyes you couldn't place, it was a miracle you got back in one piece.

'Okay ange, lets get you in bed.' You threw him onto his bed and let him laugh there as you grabbed his pajamas. This wasn't your first rodeo with drunk Pierre, so you had a routine when it same to changing him.

He nearly always wore the same linen shirts when he went out so you made quick work of that. Then it was the matter of getting him to undo his pants, so you could pull them off from the bottom of his feet. 'Come on Pierre, help me out here.' You were lightly tapping the side of his face and trying to get him to cooperate.

'You're pretty,' he said in-between giggles. 'I like you.'

'Yes that's all very nice, lets take your pants off now.' You ignored the heat in your ears.

'Woah! Take me to dinner first,' he really found that funny because he started combusting in laughter and moving around, clutching his stomach.

You finally managed to pull them off and slip on his sweats as he suddenly got very serious. It confused you for a moment when he leaned up on his arms and deadpanned. His muscles flexing and stretching as he held onto one of your arms and pulled you close. For a second, you were weak and let your eyes drop. The view of his chiseled and toned body with his sweatpants riding low enough for you to see the band of his boxers. The very moment felt sinful.

'Listen.' He said sternly but still clearly inebriated. 'Je vais t'épouser un jour.' [I'm gonna marry you.] His deep stare into your eyes felt so intense that if he wasn't very drunk, you would've given in at that moment, screw the friendship.

'Ask me when you're sober.' You laughed lightly to diffuse your own tension, face the color of a tomato, and used his leaned forward position as an advantage to slip his shirt on over his head. 'Up now.'

He listened and sat up, helping you to push his arms into the holes in the shirt. For the split second your hands were on his bare skin someone could have mistaken the moment for something very domestic. Even you would have, if you didn't know all you are is best friends.

'Alright! Time to get in bed,' you helped him get comfortable and made sure he was covered but not too hot. You got a feeling of deja vu in this moment, but chopped it up to the other times you've done this. 'Goodnight Pierre.' You smiled and pushed some of the hair off oh forehead.

'Goodnight mon trésor, je vous aime.' [i love you.] He smiled and dug further into the bed.

'Yeah, me too.' You gave him a soft smile he probably wasn't even paying attention to. You turned the lights off and before leaving his room you heard a quiet phrase.

'Je vais faire d'elle ma femme.' [I'm gonna make her my wife.]

You closed your eyes as you let your head rest against the back of his door. Something about alcohol always made Pierre more, intimate. Marriage was new though. Oh how cruel fate was.

fin.

#f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x female reader #f1 x oc #formula 1 #pierre gasly #pierre gasly x reader #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #formula one #pg10 #ch16

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tehuti88-art · 2 years ago

Photo

10/28/22: r/SketchDaily theme, "Inktober: Uh-Oh." Two (three) arts today.

Secondly: This week's character from my anthro WWII storyline is Inspector Louis Dobermann, without cap (top drawing) and with cap (bottom drawing). (The "Inspector" title is just honorary, BTW.) He's from old nobility and has some interesting secrets. There'll be more about him later in my art Tumblr and Toyhou.se.

Regarding his design, he's a fawn-&-tan doberman pinscher; I always imagined him black (he's a very old character dating back to my childhood), but changed this at the last minute. The hat...well, that's complicated.

TUMBLR EDIT: Oh boy. Oh wow. INSPECTOR DOBERMANN! I've finally gotten around to him. Oh CRAP this one is going to be long. I'm sorry. ;_;

I've gone over this before, I know I have, but I'm not sure where. Can't find it in this blog. I did create a thread on Twitter. Here's part of it.

1. DOBEY IS HERE.

I missed a meal for this. Weird rambly piecemeal thread incoming.

2. Okay, first, if you're completely new to my Twitter & you come across this and are like "WTF, dog in a hat," this is my character Inspector Louis Dobermann, & this folder on Toyhou.se might give a bit of context. Or maybe not. Dunno.

3. The very very long story short is when I was a kid (I'm in my 40s now), I came up w/ a really stupid story idea featuring anthropomorphic rats & dogs, set in WWII Germany. No, that's not symbolic of anything, they were just rats & dogs.

C'mon, I was like ten or something.

4. I never developed this story much, & moved on to my other storylines most of my life. I briefly resurrected this story, "The Trench Rats," around 2000 but lost interest again, until around Nov. 2021.

The story suddenly decided to come back to life on its own.

5. Scads of new characters, development of old characters, & most importantly, PLOT started spewing out of my unconscious. It's still ongoing, a year later. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS IS. This has NEVER happened to me, I was sure this story was dead! But here we are.

6. Insp. Louis Dobermann is one of the original characters from the very oldest, very stupidest version of the story. OMG it was so bad I won't get into it here lest I be offensive. I probably am anyway. Let me just clarify this story is NOT meant as a comedy...

7. ...though yeah, it started out pretty goofy. I was around ten!

The current version has funny moments but is more a character drama than anything. Just w/ dogs & rats instead of humans. And set in WWII.

Dobey here has always been a main character.

8. I went around 30 years, however, w/out really knowing him.

His earliest iteration was a bumbling Nazi character, bcuz when I was around ten, Nazis were bumbling characters. I didn't know all of the dark side of WWII until later.

Dobey got darker too as time went on.

9. In my teens the story went thru a melodramatic phase. Dobey was no longer bumbling, he was a terribly ominous, possibly murderous character whose exact motivations were unknown.

He also had a daughter, Adelina. His wife, Inga, was deceased.

10. Eventually I lost interest & Dobey's background & motivations remained unknown to me...until late last year when the story resurrected on its own. New characters introduced themselves, & old ones told me their stories. Including Dobey. After 30 years!

11. Took you freaking long enough, Dobey!

There's more, though this suffices to set up how Dobey got started, and how he evolved from a goofy schoolyard caricature, to a mysterious baddie, to what he's become today.

Dobey has since told me a LOT about himself (go figure such a closed-off guy would spill his guts to me), and his story is still developing. Here we go. o_o

I'd suspected for a long time that Dobermann was some sort of disgraced nobleman, likely a baron. Well, he's indeed a sort of baron, most likely a "Freiherr." Disgraced, not so much--just somewhat down on his luck. I knew he lived on a vast country estate, a huge mansion surrounded by sprawling fields and scattered woodland, similar houses at a distance here and there. When I got online and renewed my interest in the series, I began to dig. I learned a little about the old Prussian Junker (that's YOON-ker, not JUNK-er) families, and the general description fit, down to the big open areas of land I'd pictured. The Junkers apparently used to employ people to farm and tend their land, though Dobermann had no farms in my imagination. I guessed his family must have lost much of their land and employees (if you could call them that, apparently such people were close to being slaves) and now the estate is reduced to basically a skeleton crew, most of whom are home staff who care for the house itself. There are horses and stables. I've since imagined that the Dobermann estate might have just enough land and manpower left to maintain a handful of farm animals (a pig appears in a humorous function, always chasing Sgt. Gerhardt, so perhaps there are some swine, sheep, geese?), most likely cows, to supplement the family's existing wealth by selling some dairy goods in a limited fashion. It's wartime, food is needed. (Although I always forget to include rationing in my story.) So, while I can't picture the Dobermanns with large tracts of cropland, it's plausible to me that they sell limited amounts of dairy goods, maybe wool and eggs, small things like that.

Louis von Dobermann himself is born a bit before the turn of the century. He's the younger of two sons and lives on the estate with the rest of his family, mother and father and father's brother. They're the last of the von Dobermanns; although they still wield quite a bit of political influence, the glory days of the big Junker families are past, and noble titles mean little. Although they've since forfeited much of their land, the von Dobermanns are comfortable and well off. They don't NEED to try to make a living doing anything else. Louis is a rather austere, spartan sort, however, and just resting on his laurels doesn't sit well with him, so he enlists in the army. Poorer Junkers frequently did this, apparently, so even though he's not exactly poor, such a thing isn't entirely out of line for his class. As his luck would have it, Germany goes to war shortly after, and Louis heads off to the front, leaving his family behind. I don't know many details of his service though I know he does relatively well for himself, is a good fighter, excellent (though aloof) at following orders and then at giving them, courageous, selfless, though you could never call him sociable and friendly. He serves well with others but doesn't really GET ALONG with anyone. Whenever they visit towns and taverns and whatnot, he keeps to himself, doesn't carouse, doesn't get drunk, doesn't go off with the local whores. He comes across as uptight and snooty but this is written off as him just being a typical Prussian. He earns some honors, rises through the ranks (not sure how far he gets, probably lieutenant or captain), does well. It's obvious he'll likely never be a career soldier, but nobody can complain about him. Oh, right--he also insists on being called Herr Dobermann, not Herr von Dobermann; that "von" is just a little bit TOO Prussian even for him, so he eventually drops it from his name.

One day late in the war, while separated from his unit, he finds another soldier seriously wounded and unconscious, hauls him up onto his back, and manages to get him across no man's land into the safety of a trench just as a shell explodes nearby, injuring him as well. For a while they stay there, Dobermann shielding the unconscious soldier with his own body as debris continues falling into the trench. It takes him a bit to realize he can't hear anything--the shell blast deafened him. When the rest of his unit finds him, he yells that he can't hear a word they're saying. They take him and the other soldier to safety, and they end up in a sort of military hospital, in the same ward but at opposite sides of the room. Dobermann's commanding officer visits him after his own injuries are tended to (he hates the "loss of control" feeling the morphine gives him and resolves to get off it as soon as possible); but he notices that nobody comes to visit the other soldier. He learns that not only was the rest of his unit killed--he's the last one left--but he apparently has no family, either; a nurse confides that his records reveal he was a ward of the state. He's all alone.

A letter arrives for Dobermann. It's one of the senior staff from his estate, with devastating news: The Spanish flu is sweeping the country, and many members of his household have fallen ill; the von Dobermanns themselves were hit especially hard. Despite the best efforts of the city hospital, all of them--parents, uncle, brother--succumbed to the illness. Just like that, Dobermann is the last of his name. Now he's all alone, as well.

Dobermann cries to himself for likely one of the very few times in his life. Then dries his eyes and asks for a pen and paper. He writes a letter back to his staff to let them know he's alive and as soon as his injuries heal enough he'll return. He also contacts the people in charge of the family's finances, and makes a sizable donation to the hospital and to the city government to aid in the efforts to deal with the pandemic. He then returns to resting and occasionally glancing at the other soldier, who hasn't regained consciousness yet. Mulls over what it must feel like to have always been alone, now that he's in a similar position.

A young woman, tall and graceful and with long shining black hair and kind brown eyes, arrives at his bedside and smiles and talks to him for a moment. Dobermann just stares at her. When she pauses for a response, he says rather loudly, "I can't hear you. The blast hurt my ears." She looks nonplussed, gestures for him to wait a moment, leaves. Returns with pencil and paper, writes something, shows it to him. INGA, it says. "Louis," he replies, and the two of them slowly get to know each other a little through Inga's written notes and Dobermann's terse replies. Eventually he asks her why she's talking to him; she explains that she often visits soldiers in the hospitals to offer a little companionship and encouragement. Dobermann points out the soldier at the other side of the room and says, "You may want to visit him, then, whenever he wakes. He has no visitors. I've been told he has no one." Inga agrees to go talk with him when he regains consciousness.

The next day when she visits, she brings Dobermann a book: a manual on sign language. She signs her name, and teaches him how to sign his. Dobermann is exceptionally attentive and has an excellent memory, so even while he finds this rather silly, he humors her, and repeats several of the signs she makes. She leaves the book with him and he studies it on his own as he has nothing better to do.

Later that night, he wakes to find a few nurses hurrying past, and looks to see that they're rushing to the bedside of the soldier he rescued--he's awake now, and writhing around in his bed, apparently yelling in pain. They manage to restrain him so the doctor can administer morphine, after which he gradually slips off again. A nurse tells Dobermann that he'd abruptly come to, screaming at the pain in his hip and begging to know what had happened to his leg--he seemed convinced he'd lost it, and no amount of reassurance from the doctor could convince him he was expected to fully recover. Now that the drama is past, Dobermann drifts back to sleep himself.

Inga continues visiting, dividing her time between the various patients, though Dobermann receives most of her attention. While he rests she goes to visit the other soldier, a young lieutenant, who's now awake, though heavily drugged; he seems confused when she introduces herself, but introduces himself as well, as Gunter Hesse. He confirms he's had no visitors as his unit was killed and his parents died not long after he was born. He, too, asks what she wants talking to him; like Dobermann he finds it odd that somebody should just visit and chat. He doesn't mind though, and she promises to continue visiting him. Not long after, when she visits Dobermann, he repeats her when she speaks aloud, and says that although it's still muffled, his hearing is returning. They set aside the notes and signing and just talk.

As the days pass it becomes clear, though no one directly says anything, that Dobermann and Inga are developing feelings for each other. When Dobermann is allowed out of his bed to get exercise, he and Inga walk around the hospital, and one day share a brief private encounter. Soon after, Dobermann presents her with a simple gold band: His mother had made him take it with him when he headed off to war, so he'd have a part of home with him. Now, he wants Inga to have it. It's terribly short notice, but Inga accepts, and the two are wed by a chaplain. When Inga next visits Hesse, he notices the ring on her hand; she tells him the news. He blinks in surprise, then offers her a smile and says congratulations; when she admits it was rather abrupt and she's not sure what she was thinking, he replies, "Sometimes you just know." As they chat she pretends she didn't notice the very subtle shift in his eyes before he smiled: He never says anything, but she can tell Hesse has fallen in love with her, too.

Dobermann is finally set to be released, though Hesse's injury is bad enough that he needs to remain for a while longer. Inga writes down the address Dobermann says they'll be going to and gives it to Hesse (he mentions it's located out in the country), and makes him promise to write if and whenever he feels the need to. He does so, to humor her, and they bid each other farewell. Dobermann has a nice big car with driver waiting, and having packed up some of her belongings, she gets in and they head off. She falls asleep as the drive is very long; Dobermann wakes her when they draw near to his home. She's puzzled when they stop at a gate to show ID and a guard welcomes Herr Dobermann before letting the car through--then she gapes. They're headed up a long drive to a HUGE mansion, miles of fields all around. Her confusion grows when they enter the house and are greeted by a large help staff who eagerly exclaim and crowd around Dobermann; when he introduces Inga as his wife, they seem just as stunned as she is (she realizes he hadn't informed them he'd be returning with someone), but then welcome her just as happily. An older man insists on his attention and Dobermann excuses himself to take care of some important matters while a female member of the staff takes charge of Inga. Inga wonders aloud what's going on, expressing her confusion about the vast household and large staff; Dobermann hadn't told her he was rich. The maid commiserates that he hadn't told them he'd be bringing home a wife, either, but it's a good thing, as now maybe the family name won't die out with him. "Family name?" Inga echoes, wondering why it matters so much; "Why ja, Frau Dobermann, the von Dobermanns," the maid says. "Von Dobermann?--his name is von Dobermann?" Inga says, getting even more bewildered.

Maid: "Ja, Frau Dobermann, Freiherr Louis von Dobermann."

Inga: "Freiherr?? He...he's a baron?"

Maid: "Ja, Frau Dobermann, they're Junkers...he didn't tell you?"

No, Dobermann definitely didn't tell her. When he finishes up with estate business and the two get to talk again Inga asks him why. "Would your answer have been different?" he asks; she thinks briefly before saying, "Nein, I really don't believe it would've been, but what's the point?--wouldn't I have been more likely to say ja?" to which Dobermann replies, "That's the point." He promises to be upfront with her from now on, and explains the situation a bit better: He's the last von Dobermann left, and while he didn't explicitly marry her with the intention of simply carrying on the family name, obviously that's a bonus that the help staff have latched onto. He confides that it doesn't matter to him whether they have children or not, he married her because he wanted her. Whatever happens next, happens.

Word spreads that Dobermann is home at last and visitors start coming. He might be only a minor Freiherr, but the von Dobermanns are apparently well known both in the countryside among their fellow Junkers and in the city, and the family has a reputation for philanthropy. Well, no wonder they're well liked. As the youngest of the family, Dobermann himself had been relatively unknown and nobody was sure how he'd act as head of the household (a position that was supposed to go to his brother); his actions while he was in hospital showed the direction he was taking, and representatives of the hospital and the city arrive to offer profuse thanks for the donations he'd made. They want to confer honors upon him to recognize the good he did. Dobermann is extremely ill at ease with this attention--he's not used to being in the limelight, and prefers to just do his thing without public recognition--but the authorities insist, and he rather unwillingly agrees to attend a small public ceremony. Here, he's presented with the honorary title of "Inspector," given a watchman's cap, and symbolically named the Watchman of the City; in addition he's informed of plans for a memorial at a future time. He finds all of this utterly stupid and insufferable but tolerates it, because diplomacy. This of course results in yet more visitors to the estate, and Dobermann resentfully dresses up for the part each time, even wearing "that stupid f**king hat." Inga finds his irritation amusing but helps out by accompanying him, and it turns out everyone loves her even more than her husband. Unlike him, she's charming, polite, and knows how to handle attention, which he definitely doesn't mind, so at the numerous gatherings they have to give and attend, she does most of the talking and socializing, while he continues working behind the scenes. It's an unexpected but beneficial arrangement.

After some time settling into this strange new life, Inga belatedly remembers Lt. Hesse, and wonders how he's doing, since he's never written. She visits the military hospital, but is informed that Hesse was discharged some time previously; following the armistice, the German army was greatly reduced, and both Dobermann and Hesse lost their military positions. She gets his address, and calls a car to go into the city to pay him a visit. The address is of a tiny apartment in a pretty low-rent building, and it finally occurs to Inga that Hesse isn't one of her or Dobermann's sort; he comes from a much poorer family, and while they left him enough savings to get by, that's pretty much all he's been doing, just getting by--he aged out of the orphanage that cared for him, no one ever adopted him, and now the military has left him on his own as well. Inga knocks at his door and calls his name but gets no response. It's unlocked, so she lets herself in--and finds Hesse slumped on his bed, unconscious from a morphine overdose. Alarmed, she barely manages to rouse him; he refuses to let her call a doctor--"Doctors are what got me here"--so she decides to call Dobermann instead, and bring Hesse back to their house. She has to leave the apartment and go to a nearby establishment to do so as Hesse has no phone (he barely has anything), and of course has to wake him again when she returns. She stays with him until Dobermann arrives, and they carry him downstairs and out to the waiting car; after expressing confusion over what Dobermann is doing there, Hesse completely passes out so Dobermann nearly drops him. They drive him back to the estate and get him settled in a room, and Inga waits for him to wake again.

Hesse comes to a while later, perplexed about where he is and why Inga is there; she explains things and he too had no idea Dobermann comes from money. He doesn't tell much about what's happened since they last talked; sensing his shame, she doesn't press. She insists on him staying with them at least until he's better. He expresses doubt about this plan, but doesn't argue much. Inga makes sure he's as comfortable as possible before leaving him alone.

(Privately, she wonders aloud to Dobermann what the appeal is, why someone like Hesse would so easily get hooked. Dobermann hesitates a moment before saying, "Imagine the time in your life when you felt safest and happiest, most protected and warm. Just purely loved, nothing else. Now make that tenfold. That still doesn't quite capture what it's like." Inga asks why, if he went through the same thing, it was so much easier for him and he didn't get hooked. "I don't like how it made me feel," he replies. "But then again, I've had a family, I've felt loved. I imagine if you've never had these things, it might be harder to let go.")

When Inga next visits Hesse, it's obvious he's starting to experience withdrawal; he sweats and shakes and chatters as if freezing, and can barely tolerate the pain in his hip. She pauses, leaves, returns with something, hesitantly holds it out to him. He sees the little case he keeps the needle and morphine in and pulls back. Inga says she won't stop him from using it if he has to, since he never actually agreed to quit; but he shakes his head and says he doesn't want it. "You did something for me," he says, "so now I'll do something for you." Inga tries to explain that he doesn't owe anything, but he insists on quitting cold turkey, and follows through. Inga continues to visit and tend to him through the next week of vomiting and chills and nausea and sweating and more vomiting. Lots of fun. He comes out the other side thin and weak and groggy, but alive. He (and Dobermann) had intended on him returning home afterward, but Inga coaxes him into staying a while longer ("until you feel a hundred percent") and he stays. He ends up becoming a sort of permanent guest, which makes both him and the asocial Dobermann somewhat ill at ease, though Dobermann never insists that he leave. Hesse isn't aware that both he and Inga know he loves her, but this fact isn't what bothers Dobermann--he isn't jealous, he knows Inga doesn't feel the same, and won't cheat on him. Rather, he can see Hesse's issues and character better than Inga can, and certain little details niggle at him. While he knows Hesse is trustworthy and wouldn't ever intentionally hurt any of them, he can also sense something dangerous beneath the surface, and suspects he could very well harm them without meaning to. Inga insists he's a good person, though, so he backs off, yet keeps his eyes open.

It isn't long before Inga becomes pregnant. She and Dobermann welcome a daughter, Adelina, to their home; while Dobermann and everyone else nickname her "Addy," Inga prefers to call her "Lina." She worries about how Hesse will react, but it's apparent almost from the start how much he loves the girl, even referring to her as "Lina" just as Inga does. When Inga awakens late one night, sure she'd heard the baby crying, she goes into her room but finds the crib empty; she quickly paces the halls in a near-panic, before coming upon Hesse seated in a chair by a window, asleep with Adelina (also sleeping) in his arms. He wakes and apologizes, explaining that as he was taking one of his customary late-night walks around the household (to exercise his hip), he heard the baby crying, and decided to take her with him; she fell asleep again as he walked and sang her lullabies. Although it doesn't quite sit well with Dobermann, Inga allows Hesse to look after and tend to Adelina whenever she and Dobermann are busy or don't immediately wake up. Hesse takes to this new role very well--he adores "little Lina," and looking after her gives him a new sense of purpose, as well as distracts him from his pain and loneliness. He doesn't view it as a chore at all. The result is that, although both Dobermann and Inga mean well and do their best, it's Hesse who plays the greatest role in raising Adelina, and Hesse is the one she grows closest to, eventually referring to him as "Uncle Gunter." Hesse even passes on the old tales he was told in the orphanage, of knights and maidens and honor and loyalty, and Adelina dreams of one day finding her own knight, the same as young Hesse had dreamed of finding a maiden.

Here's the aspect of Dobermann that bothered me most, and I keep considering modifying it, but it's his major flaw and I figure it's needed for his character. While he really does love Adelina...he's really not a good father. He isn't abusive, he's just not there. Despite him being the last of his name, and falling in love with Inga, the thought of actually raising kids seems not to have crossed his mind, and the result is he has no idea how to deal with her. His family was never particularly emotionally demonstrative (when his mother gave him her ring to take with him, he reacted with exasperation at how silly it was), so he never learned how to express love in a suitable way; it's just his luck that Inga understands him so well and isn't bothered by his coldness and general lack of affection. Addy isn't so fortunate; she views her father's distance as disapproval, and spends her life trying everything she can to earn his love. There's nothing for her to earn--Dobermann already loves her. But he doesn't know how to properly show it, and Inga is often busy dealing with her husband's personal and social dealings, so Addy ends up relying on Hesse for the love and attention she desires so much. And, likely because he knows exactly what it feels like, Hesse delivers. Addy is homeschooled by tutors, and they live in the middle of nowhere, and the nearest neighbors have no children, so she's close to no one aside from Hesse--he's literally her only companion, and he fills the roles of father, mother, uncle, mentor, friend, and playmate (and, when Addy gets older, potential husband) all in one. Dobermann and much of the help staff find it odd and unseemly that Addy spends so much of her time in the company of and playing with a man old enough to be her father, but Inga trusts him, and he really is good at it.

EDIT: Well cripes...only after I had finally finished this writeup, Dobey, Addy, and Hesse revealed additional details that I think provide some clarification for Dobey's parental attitude. A scene occurs where Addy describes a hazy memory to Gerhardt while Hesse is nearby, half listening.

Adelina: "When I was very little we all went to visit the city, Mama, Papa, and me...you know how when you're little, everything that looks normal now seems so big? The city was so huge and I was so small. I was all right while I was with Mama and Papa. But we got separated somehow...I ran all over that big big city calling for them...I couldn't find them anywhere...and everything looked so different, I couldn't find anything familiar...I just found the littlest spot I could find and I sat there and cried. I'd never been all alone before. It's the worst feeling in the world... Mama found me. Swept me up into her arms like an angel reaching down from heaven."

Hesse: (puzzled look)

Addy: "She held me so tight I thought she'd never let me go. I still feel that, her arms around me so tight, sometimes...then I open my eyes, and she's gone. I don't think I'll ever get used to it."

Hesse says nothing at the time, but later he addresses her privately.

Hesse: "Lina. That story you told before, about when you and your parents went to the city."

Addy: "You heard that?"

Hesse: "Is that truly how you remember it? What happened that day?"

Addy: "Ja, Uncle...why? Why would I make it up?"

Hesse: "It's just...that's not what I heard happened. I wasn't there but when you all returned, your mother told me."

Addy: "What do you mean?"

Hesse: "Your father found you. Not your mother. That's what I was told."

Addy is struck mute. She was POSITIVE Inga was the one who found her. But the more she racks her brain, the more the hazy childhood memory clears: It wasn't her mother calling for Lina and scooping her up and hugging her, it was Dobermann calling for Addy and picking her up and holding her. She can't understand why her brain rewrote the memory the way it did, but the reason is right there: With how cold and distant and uninvolved Dobermann is now, it's difficult to reconcile that with the panicked, concerned father from her childhood. Yet they're both the same Dobermann. What happened? Well...remember when Dobermann described the feeling of being on morphine to Inga, and how much he hated the feeling of the loss of control it gave him...? There are other situations that can give that feeling of a loss of control...including being a new father, taking care of your child. Sure, Dobermann was raised in a stuffy, emotionally closed-off atmosphere where showing too much feeling about anything was frowned upon, and this is pretty much his character...but he DOES still feel those emotions. I'm pretty sure this becomes clear eventually--he's not a sociopath--but it's even more complex than I'd thought. Marriage, and especially fatherhood, started to change him, to thaw the exterior and let out what was buried inside. He likely would have continued to mellow out and open up if circumstances had gone differently and if he'd been better emotionally prepared to deal with things. Nearly losing Addy in the city, however, was a turning point. There isn't quite a "loss of control" feeling the same as being a father who's lost his child (and in this case, he really does blame himself--Inga had left Addy with him for a few moments, and he got distracted)--like Addy says, it's one of the worst feelings in the world. And even though Dobermann does find her, and Inga doesn't blame him for the incident, he can't bear the way it made him feel, the loss of control, not just of the situation but of his feelings. It's like getting hit by a train, everything all at once--love, fear, rage, grief, relief, guilt--and just like the feeling of being drugged, it's too overwhelming, too much for him to handle on his own. Inga tries to convince him this is normal, this is what being a parent is like, and she's finding it out for herself, too--but she wasn't raised in the same stifled environment he was, she actually has mental resources she can draw on while he has no idea how to handle it. She's his partner, she promises to be there to help him through it; but he's been taught not to ask for help, to be self-reliant and figure out how to do things on his own. The only way he can think of to handle overwhelming emotion--both good and bad (because both extremes are equally discouraged)--is to avoid the stimulus in the first place. Which, in this case, means avoiding getting close to Addy. If he keeps her at a distance, he can't lose control, and to him this also means he's keeping her safe--because the last time he was too close to her he nearly lost her. He counts on Inga and, ironically, Hesse to directly care for her while he protects her from a distance. This likely helps explain why he tolerates Hesse's participation in raising his daughter even though he'd prefer if it were different; despite Hesse's efforts to be stoic, he's more in touch with his emotions than Dobermann is, and he's directly dealt quite a lot with loss of control (both in being a recovering morphine addict, and in being an orphan who had to depend on the state for his wellbeing), so even though he never had any family, he's better equipped to handle being a father. Although Dobermann dislikes Hesse, he relies on him to protect Addy in the way he himself is too insecure to.

Tl;dr, Dobermann has very strong emotions, and especially empathy...but his ability to deal with them effectively is severely impaired--he never learned how. And rather than learn how to cope with this, he chooses to avoid. This, rather than being cold and distant, is his character flaw--the fact that he decides it's better to keep his distance than to plow through the pain. To get a bit ahead of myself, he handles the Nazis and the Diamond Network in much the same way, trying his hardest to deal with them without directly dealing with them, because getting involved will mean a lot of unpleasant work he'd rather not deal with; it's only when Inga's actions force his hand that he finally acts. This also explains why later in the story, after Hesse has to dive into the water to pull Addy out when her own negligence causes her to nearly drown, Dobermann's only reaction is to snap angrily in Addy's face, "Foolish!" He's afraid and angry and loving and relieved all at once but all he knows how to safely show is the anger--because it keeps the distance between them. Of course, all Addy sees is the anger, so she has trouble believing he actually loves her. No way this person once swept her up in his arms like an angel reaching down from heaven, and held her like he'd never let her go. That must have been her mother. As time goes by and she and Dobermann grow further apart, her brain gradually rewrites the memory in a way that makes more sense, even though it isn't reality. It takes Hesse--who otherwise spends most of the series lying to and gaslighting Addy every chance he gets--to tell her the truth.

Anyway...

Slowly, the national atmosphere begins to change. A political party called the NSDAP (the Nazis) rises to power. There had already been ugly rumors about how and why Germany lost the war--"Idiots spewing nonsense," Dobermann had confided to Inga, "the generals knew we'd lost long before we actually did, they just didn't want us to know"--yet Hesse had taken a different path, believing the story that they'd been winning before being stabbed in the back by their enemies--and the enemy, according to the NSDAP in this case, is largely the Jews. He'd been quite bitter about this already when Inga had rescued him; his stay with the Dobermanns, caring for Addy, had tempered his anger considerably, but now it starts creeping back. And Dobermann's misgivings about his character start to make sense to Inga, although she tries hard to excuse his growing spite. He's her friend--he's kind, he's intelligent, he dotes on little Adelina--surely he can't fall for such hateful nonsense, surely this is a passing phase. Yet the more toxic the national fervor grows, the more toxic Hesse's attitude grows along with it. Although he doesn't attempt to indoctrinate Addy intentionally, this is what starts to happen anyway--she's so close to him that she picks up on all his little emotions and makes them her own. It isn't long before she starts parroting the same hateful ideals Hesse has developed; it's only Inga and Hesse himself (he actually is dismayed by this tendency) actively discouraging her from doing this that quiets her down, though the ideas are still there. She'd do anything for Uncle Gunter's approval, after all.

Not Hesse, not Addy, not even Dobermann himself have any idea WHY Hesse's attitude alarms Inga so much, why she's so desperate not to believe it. She never told Dobermann before or after they married, as it just didn't seem to matter at the time, she'd barely ever thought about it herself. Inga is Jewish, and the new laws being implemented endanger not just her, but Addy and Dobermann as well--Addy for being "Mischling," part Jew and not a full German citizen, Dobermann for breaking the race laws in marrying a Jew and fathering a mixed-race child. (A note on artistic license here, the category of Mischling has more nuance than I'm indicating here, plus at least initially these laws seemed to "grandfather" certain Jewish/non-Jewish marriages if they occurred before a certain date (sometime in 1935, I think?); Dobey and Inga married around 1919, give or take a year, so their marriage would've been valid, I believe. Not sure how well they stuck to this law, but it doesn't go exactly like that in my version of events. No grandfathering in mine. Plus all of this occurs slightly earlier than IRL.) She realizes she'll have to be extra careful now to never let anyone know, and this means she never knows for sure whether she'll even have the support of Hesse or Dobermann should the truth get out. I. e., her own husband could very well be her enemy now.

Hesse follows the news with growing interest and fervor. He's still angry about the army cutting him loose, so he doesn't want to rejoin, even if they'll have him. Multiple paramilitary groups have started springing up, though, and he thinks he might like to join one of them, but he's not in great shape; he's grown a little soft from his injury and living in ease at the Dobermann estate. He determines to get back in shape. He diets, exercises, and attempts to completely turn his mindset around--ironically, to be more like Dobermann's, rather severe and stoic. No more moping or slacking off. He gets in good enough shape (even overcoming his limp) to apply to and be accepted into the SS-Verfügungstruppe (soon after renamed the Waffen-SS) just in time to go back into combat as war breaks out. (Remember, the war is timed and plays out differently here.) (There's also another liberty taken regarding SS physical requirements. Hesse is farsighted (hyperopia), requiring glasses to see things up close. The SS would almost certainly have rejected him for this so early on; they relaxed their requirements further as time went on, though not at this point. For some reason an exception is made here though I'm unsure why, it's never mentioned, except later when Hesse transfers and his new boss Col. Heidenreich remarks that Hesse's glasses aren't ideal but the rest of his qualities make up for it. Perhaps his service in the Great War sways them a bit.) Adelina is devastated when he breaks the news that he'll be heading off to the Eastern Front (Germany and Russia become enemies far sooner in this timeline); Inga is both heartbroken, and strangely relieved--the former because she'll miss him AND he's definitely sided with the Nazis, the latter because at least it might break his hold on Adelina. Dobermann is just glad to be rid of him finally.

While Hesse is away, he does keep in touch with both Inga and Addy, writing letters. Addy keeps watch for him to return at first, before realizing he's going to be gone for quite a while; she grows depressed, and Inga tries hard to be there for her, to fill the void. Meanwhile, Dobermann is dealing with a new problem: The Nazi Party has started courting him. A lot of the big Junker country houses have numerous hidden passages and rooms and it occurs to the Nazis in the newly formed Wehrmacht that these could be quite strategically advantageous for them in combating the issue of partisans and resistance members, which have also been on the rise. Dobermann is well known to them for his generous donations to the city as well as his previous service, and they assume he has a strong nationalist streak because of this; Nazi officials start paying him visits, wheedling and cajoling for access to his property. Surely a patriot and fellow traveler like Herr Dobermann would be willing to help the cause? Dobermann is dumbfounded by the attention and unsure how to respond--mainly because the Nazis have completely misjudged him. He's NOT a nationalist (as his earlier criticism of the German army made clear), he despises the Nazi leadership, and he's especially unsettled by the stories he's been hearing about them attacking Jewish-owned properties and starting to confine various people in camps. He served with Jews in the Great War, they defended Germany just as much as he did, so this shift in public attitude makes no sense to him. He even privately, to Inga, refers to the Nazis as "preening clowns"; but for the most part, he's very careful with how he speaks. An old acquaintance of his who also served in the previous war, who's now a commanding officer in the Wehrmacht yet not a member of the Nazi Party, warns him that the Nazis are keeping very careful track of who's on their side or not, and this includes speech against the Third Reich. Dobermann better watch what he says and does, lest he trigger suspicion that he's not faithful enough to the Nazi cause; considering that even Jewish Germans who served faithfully in the Great War are now being put out of business, confined to ghettos, and transported to camps for "reeducation," his own position as a Junker definitely won't be enough to protect him this time.

The Nazis just get pushier with their requests; Dobermann doesn't dare turn them down outright, but he tries to think of ways to put them off longer. Although he detests it, he hosts more gatherings and parties at his estate to placate the richer Nazis who are easily impressed by his wealth and influence; he lets them tour carefully selected parts of his house, sits with them in the parlor and lets them talk and drink until they're blitzed, and gives just the right platitudes for them to believe he's on their side and plans to offer his support at some future time. Inga, ever the graceful socialite, helps greatly in this effort--men are instantly smitten with her, and just a smile makes them think they have a chance at anything; at the very least, she's a good distraction. She isn't completely sure where her own husband's loyalties lie--she's aware that he thinks the Nazis themselves are idiots, but for all she knows, he's perfectly in line with their views on the Jews, so she's constantly on edge. Nevertheless, even she sees the usefulness in staying on their good side while keeping them at arm's length, so she goes along with the ruse, no matter what Dobermann's motivations might be.

His old connections to the German army come in useful, as well. When the Nazi officials get too bold for him to handle delicately, he requests assistance, and it comes in an unusual form. A handful of Wehrmacht officers who are not affiliated with the Nazi Party arrive to help patrol his estate and keep their fellow officers, as well as party officials, at bay. Most are either older soldiers from the Great War, who aren't as fit at serving on the front lines as before, or younger soldiers who show better organizational than combat skills. Dobermann is vaguely familiar with an older sergeant named Alger Holt, and puts him in informal charge of the others. They man the front gate of his property, taking over checking IDs from the previous guards; walk the perimeter of the property to watch for any trespassers; and patrol the interior of the house, being particularly vigilant whenever there are visitors. Whenever anyone gets too pushy, they politely but firmly step in and if necessary escort them from the property. The fact that this new security detail belongs to the Heer itself lends it an air of credibility and faithfulness to the state, so this arrangement, however odd it may be, proves to be quite helpful.

Several years in, a letter arrives addressed from an SS hospital: Hesse has been wounded. He's again expected to make a full recovery, yet the injury is serious enough to keep him out of combat for an extended period, so there's the insinuation that his military career is over. Addy is overjoyed to learn "Uncle Gunter" will be returning after so long; Inga is relieved that he's survived. Dobermann doesn't like the thought of him coming back to stay with them again, but keeps his thoughts to himself. They have to wait until his condition is stable enough to travel, then the trip via train is a long one, so it's a while before he arrives; Addy is right there waiting at the gate once a covered truck is spotted rambling up the road to the estate, and as soon as Hesse exits the back she throws her arms around him, making him exclaim aloud and almost fall over--Inga has to pull her back to let him regain his balance. He's thinner but more muscular than she remembers him, his face gaunt and his eyes glassy, and he supports himself on a crutch--turns out his left hip was injured, similar to before. Despite his obvious exhaustion, he expresses amazement at the sight of Addy: "You've grown up!" Embarrassed, Addy grabs his duffel bag before he can stop her and lugs it off; Inga hugs him and welcomes him back. (Dobermann is away in the city.) Hesse is perplexed by the presence of Wehrmacht troops at the estate, so Inga explains the situation; apparently concerned, he offers to help ward off the Nazi officials himself, reasoning that his position in the SS might lend him more authority. Inga is surprised by this offer, yet insists that he's there to rest and recuperate and not to worry about it. They catch up a little bit on their way in, Hesse confirming that his time in the Waffen-SS is over; Inga says, "I know it's not the outcome you wanted, but I'm glad you're back." She reaches out to touch his face--something she's done in the past, at which he usually placed his hand over hers--except this time he flinches away and doesn't let her; she can tell he still has feelings, but something between them has fundamentally changed. He heads to his old room to take a nap and she promises to bring him a drink and wake him for dinner. When she visits his room a few minutes later with a pitcher of ice water, she finds him already asleep atop the covers, still fully dressed--even in his boots.

Dobermann returns and they all eat dinner together--Hesse looking bemused at the several Wehrmacht guards who join them--before relaxing on the patio for a bit; Addy begs Hesse to tell her all about what fighting in a war is like, though he demurs, and Inga privately tells her to give him some time. Eventually they head off to their rooms; Inga goes to check on Hesse again, and again finds him sleeping already, though this time he undressed and covered up. His chest is visible--Inga sees that he sports a tattoo now, a large Totenkopf--skull-and-crossbones--across his breast. This is one of the symbols of the SS. She leaves, suddenly feeling very uneasy.

Hesse settles back into everyday life at the estate and things go much as they had before, just with troops around; he follows up on his offer, and a few times helps dissuade visiting Nazis from pestering Dobermann. A horse trailer arrives--he'd requested ownership of his SS horse, Gewitter, and Addy is over the moon ("You have a horse, Uncle Gunter??"); she brushes and fawns over the mare and literally jumps for joy when Hesse says she can ride her later if she'd like. Dobermann watches all this with arms crossed and a skeptical look; Hesse requests a stall in the stables and promises to cover the expense--he's not indigent anymore, as the SS takes good care of its members. Dobermann just stares sourly at him for a moment before waving it off; he doesn't care if Gewitter is housed for free.

Then, some weeks later, comes an official-looking envelope, addressed from SS intelligence headquarters; Inga uneasily takes it to Hesse. Hesse looks rather uncomfortable himself as he opens it and reads the letter within before handing it to her to read, and explaining the situation: While he was in hospital, the SS doctor who treated him noticed how gloomy he was at the prospect of leaving the Waffen-SS, and suggested that he transfer to a different branch, instead--the intelligence division of the Allgemeine-SS, the non-combatant branch headed by Rupprecht Heidenreich, was looking for new members. Hesse requested a transfer, but didn't wish to tell the Dobermanns until he was sure whether it had gone through or not. The letter informs him his application has been accepted. Misinterpreting the growing distress on Inga's face, he tries to reassure her that it's merely a desk job, boring, nothing dangerous; all he'll be doing is keeping records, investigating issues involving his fellow SS officers, making sure the race laws are being followed--nothing she or Adelina need worry about. Of course all this does is fill her with even more dread. Addy is saddened to learn that with Hesse's new job comes a new place to live, an SS-provided apartment in the city; but he promises to visit frequently and stay with them now and then. Dobermann has no complaint about Hesse going to stay elsewhere, though he does share a few words about his new job itself: "Ridiculous," he mutters, then when Inga asks what he's talking about, "Keeping tabs on everyone. You think everyone's a criminal, it says a lot about you, especially when you're the one making the laws." He refuses to elaborate further when Inga presses, and changes the subject.

Hesse visits the city for an interview and a meeting with a tailor to be measured for his new uniform; it arrives and he tries it on, then shows Addy, who ohh's and ahh's over the all-black tunic and breeches and cap and boots, and especially the honor sword he's earned--"You have a horse and a sword now, Uncle Gunter, just like a knight!" Inga and Dobermann are more restrained in their reactions; Dobermann hates the uniform but bites his tongue, while Inga, well, obviously she hates it too, especially since Dobermann has confided in her a few times about stories he's been hearing regarding what the SS actually does. (Remember those camps? The SS runs them.) Adelina's admiration is particularly unsettling, and again, Inga is somewhat relieved when Hesse returns to the city, but fears the thought of what he'll be doing all day. The SS has been compiling a massive collection of records on all German citizens, especially the Jews, and she can't help but wonder if her name's in there somewhere.

Hesse still visits and stays over at times; his attitude toward her doesn't change, so Inga starts to find it hard to believe he could ever turn on the family. He doesn't even express nearly the same amount of nationalistic spite as previously. She has no idea that he's merely getting good at dividing his life in two, keeping his intelligence duties out of sight. Several more Wehrmacht troops arrive to keep watch over things, including a young Junker private named Konrad Helmstadt, who pretty much takes charge of the household; he's organized and efficient, and despite not getting along well with Hesse (he also hates the SS), the two of them do a decent job keeping nuisances away, and he's respectful toward Dobermann. On the other hand, pressure steps up on Dobermann to "make nice" with prominent Nazi officials, as he isn't seen as quite patriotic enough; he swallows his irritation and accepts the suggestion that he "befriend" an especially well-known SS officer, Lt. Col. Ernst Dannecker, the commandant of the nearby labor camp.

(THIS HERE IS A NEW PLOT POINT BTW, WOOT WOOT.)

Both the camp and Dannecker have very nasty reputations, and Dobermann is very reluctant to follow through, but does so anyway: "If they see you're friends with a snake like Herr Dannecker," Sgt. Holt reasons, "perhaps they'll be inclined to stop bothering you for a while." Dobermann and Inga invite Dannecker to come visit, and he accepts. Inga and Addy greet Dannecker when he arrives with his stepdaughter Margarethe (he claims his wife and other stepchildren weren't able to come). Lots of polite hallos but the Dobermanns can't stand him from the start, with his oily smile and manner and his hard eyes and the odd way he acts toward Gret, who's even wearing a black dress that nearly matches his uniform. The whole thing is very weird but they welcome the Danneckers into the parlor and Dobermann comes to greet them as well. Addy offers to show Gret around the house (they're closer in age than anyone else she's met, so she hopes they'll get along); Gret doesn't respond until Dannecker says, "Go along, Gret dear, it's all right; have fun." Addy shows her various rooms she thinks might be interesting, though Gret maintains the same blank, speechless demeanor the whole time; it starts to unnerve Addy. When Addy says, "I like very much your dress, it looks like your stepfather's uniform!" Gret gives her a look that makes her wilt. She finally shows a bit of personality when they come across Hesse's room--his door was accidentally left open, and he forgot to take his second uniform with him into the city. Addy explains this is "Uncle Gunter's" room and she doesn't think they should go in. "Your uncle is SS?" Gret asks--the first words she's spoken aside from "Hallo" and "Ja, Papa." Addy says he is but "He's not really my uncle." "He's not here tonight, he's in the city; he works for the Allgemeine-SS," she adds, hoping she's found a similarity between them. "Papa works for the SS-Totenkopfverbände," Gret says; Addy's never heard of them, so Gret clarifies, "They run the camps. Papa has his own camp, and all kinds of prisoners, Jews and Zigeuner and all, and if you don't respect him, he'll shoot you." Addy is like, "Um...all right." o_o Gret then turns to her and says, "I've heard houses like this are full of hidden passages," and Addy perks up and says, "Ja, it is! You'd like to see some--?" and shows her one close to her own room; "There are so many of them, we don't even know them all." "It's rather small," Gret says, peering inside; then, an especially strange comment: "The one Papa showed me is much, much bigger. You could scream down there, and no one would hear you." Addy starts to explain that the passages have to be small to fit between the walls when Gret cuts her off with, "I'd like to go back to Papa now, bitte," and that's it. Addy leads her back to the parlor, then excuses herself, utterly weirded out.

Dobermann and Inga, meanwhile, have been chatting--so to speak--with Dannecker. He does most of the talking since Dobermann isn't that skilled at smalltalk. Dannecker finally says, "Why is it, exactly, that we're here right now? What exactly are you looking for?" "Looking for...?" Dobermann echoes, to which Dannecker replies, "What sort of favor do you want?" He's not stupid--he knows he isn't there to just socialize. "No favor," Dobermann says, then, "I doubt you have anything I would want." Inga hisses under her breath, "Louis!"--but Dannecker just starts laughing and says, "I like when someone speaks plain. So then why are we here? If not a favor, what is it you want?" Dobermann takes a big risk--likely just because he finds the commandant so unlikable and is getting fed up with it all--and replies, "I've been told I have to make nice with people like you, to get in good with the Reich." Inga nearly crawls out of her skin at that, but all Dannecker does is smile and say, "I knew it wasn't because you particularly enjoy my company. Your lovely wife looks about ready to run away and never come back." He ignores Inga's stricken look, clasps his hands, and leans toward Dobermann, saying, "So--how best might we benefit each other? I scratch your back and you scratch mine...?"

Well, it positively skeeves the Dobermanns out, but Dannecker's friendship does come with a bonus--the Nazis settle down and drop their mutterings about Dobermann's devotion to the Third Reich. Dannecker, meanwhile, benefits from Dobermann's pristine reputation as Watchman of the City, distracting somewhat from his own unsavory reputation. They have to socialize now and then to keep up appearances, though Dobermann insists to Inga that he'll meet with the commandant on his own turf since he can't stand having him in his house. (Addy doesn't mind her aborted friendship with Gret: "So...creepy, with her blank face and her little goosestep," she tells her mother, "like a spooky little china doll.")

This results in Dannecker inviting him to tour the camp itself; Dobermann puts this off for a while but finally relents. Oh God does he HATE it. Dannecker's camp isn't a death camp, but it has its fair share of deaths and executions, so that it has its own crematorium; the yard is almost always muddy, and conditions are harsh, with Dannecker being so well known for psychologically tormenting his prisoners that he's earned the nickname Der Teufel (the Devil)--even his own guards are afraid of him and his unpredictable mix of casual amusement and hair-trigger rage. He's always polite with Dobermann, however, including as he shows him the camp--of which he seems inordinately proud--and casually points out the ovens for burning bodies and the place where prisoners periodically line up to be sent right, to work, or left, to execution via firing squad. Such a line has formed while Dobermann is there--current prisoners being assessed for their continued usefulness, rather than new arrivals--and Dobermann is allowed to look at the logbook of the officer sending them left or right. It lists names, numbers, offenses, birthplaces, professions. He notices one name, SCHÄFER, TOBIAS, with the words JUDE and ARZT, as well as the notation LINKS--"Left." "This one is a doctor...?" he asks, and after receiving the affirmative, asks Dannecker to point him out; Dannecker complains that he doesn't know one Jew from another, though when Dobermann shows him the name, he realizes he does vaguely know this one--he points out a slight, bespectacled man huddled with the group awaiting execution. Why is he about to be shot? He slightly hurt his arm, and is no longer fit for heavy work. Seems like quite a piddly reason. Dobermann asks, "Why do you not employ this one in the medical ward, like the other camps do?--it seems like a waste to kill a doctor." Dannecker bristles at the suggestion and briefly drops his smarmy facade: "We employ good Germans only--not Jews! You're insane if you think I'd let one put his filthy hands on anyone else." Dobermann bites down his first reaction, takes in, and lets out a breath.

Dobermann: "How much do you want for him?"

Dannecker: (dumbfounded) "You...want to buy him?"

Dobermann: (stare)

Dannecker: (pause) "I don't need money, the SS pays me very well."

Dobermann: (stare)

Dannecker: (pause) "I couldn't help but notice your household possesses a rather fine collection of antique tapestries."

Dobermann: (frowns) "You want a tapestry?"

Dannecker: (smiles) "My choice."

Dobermann: (pause) (holds out his hand)

Dannecker: (smiles wider, shakes his hand) "We have ourselves a deal, then."

Dobermann stands there and watches as Dannecker saunters over to the group of prisoners, calling out, "Herr Doktor." The prisoner doesn't even look at him. Dannecker gets a sour look and says, louder, "Herr Doktor," gets no response. It's only when he gets right in the prisoner's face and yells, "HERR DOKTOR!" that he finally reacts, gasping and flinching back; Dannecker points at Dobermann, in a poor mood now, and says, "Go with him." Schäfer hesitates, obviously confused, so Dannecker kicks at his leg and he hurries toward Dobermann. Then stops. Dobermann notices how he never reacts to Dannecker in the slightest until the commandant gets in his face, in his line of sight, this time smacking him with his crop and repeating, "Go--with--him," slowly, as if he thinks Schäfer is an idiot. Dobermann gestures for him to follow, and as they exit the gate--Schäfer peering around himself anxiously--Dannecker calls out, "I'll be by soon for my tapestry!"

(He later ends up choosing one of a pair of tapestries, an angel and a devil. The devil tapestry amuses him--he's fully aware of the nickname everyone has for him--and he cheerfully leaves with it.)

Dobermann's driver is perplexed when Dobermann lets a Jewish prisoner into the car before getting in himself, but he doesn't explain. As they drive away, Dobermann gestures to capture Schäfer's attention, then with his hands he signs, YOU ARE DEAF? Schäfer, surprised, confirms this (and that he can also read lips), then asks, "How did you know?" Dobermann explains the little signs he saw back at the camp; Schäfer responds that Dannecker never found out that he was deaf, he managed to hide it so well--otherwise, he would have been executed immediately as a disabled defective, rather than put to work. Dobermann then asks if he's indeed a doctor. "I was," Schäfer says, "until they made it illegal." He asks why Dobermann saved him, and Dobermann says he needs an in-home physician at his estate; when Schäfer protests, "But--I'm no longer allowed to practice, it's the law," Dobermann replies, "Under my roof, you're allowed. It's my law."

Inga, and Addy, are also surprised when Dobermann returns with his unusual guest. Dobermann briefly explains things; the two women look at Schäfer curiously, and Addy, who to her knowledge has only ever heard about but never met a Jew, asks in all sincerity, "Do you eat babies...?" Aghast, Inga rebukes her, and offers to get him something to eat from the kitchen (Schäfer wasn't in the camp very long, but he's quite thin and gaunt and spattered with mud); she leads him there while Dobermann has a few words with Holt and Helmstadt about the situation. "I don't remember the details very well, I'm not sure if it's all kosher," Inga apologizes when she brings him some food; the comment puzzles Schäfer but he tells her he doesn't mind, and scarfs down the food ravenously. She returns him to Dobermann, who leads him off to a guest room to stay in for the time being. As they walk up the hallway, Schäfer suddenly shrinks in on himself and cowers behind Dobermann; Dobermann looks at him, then forward again. Hesse, in full uniform, is approaching from ahead. He greets Dobermann, sees Schäfer, furrows his brow a little: "What's this?" "This is Herr Schäfer," Dobermann replies, "and he's going to be the home physician." Hesse blinks in surprise--then his expression shifts into such unbridled hatred that Schäfer cowers again. As if Schäfer isn't even right there, Hesse hisses under his breath that Dobermann needs to return Schäfer to the camp right now.

Hesse: "What are you thinking? Forget about this nonsense. You can employ any good German doctor you want!"

Dobermann: "As far as I'm aware, he is German."

Hesse: "You know exactly what I mean!"

Dobermann: "I do, and that's why I'd like you to hold your tongue."

Hesse: "You're breaking the law!"

Dobermann: "And you're a guest in this house. If you don't like the way I do things, you're free to leave. Go ahead and report me if you'd like, but you'll have to report Herr Dannecker, too. I doubt he'll appreciate that. Now excuse us, but I'm getting Herr Schäfer set up in his room."

Schäfer gets only Hesse's part of this exchange since he's standing behind Dobermann. He has no idea WTF is going on, just that there's an SS officer in the house, he and Dobermann seem familiar with each other, and he wants Schäfer to go right back to the camp. Hesse glares at Dobermann, shoots Schäfer an ugly look, and spits on the floor before turning and stalking away. Dobermann gestures at the trembling Schäfer to follow and gets him to his room, briefly going over how they'll get him some new clothes (he's still in his striped prison uniform), medical equipment as soon as he's settled in, and will rig up his room so he can tell when someone is at his door. He points out the bathroom so Schäfer can wash up, and a dumbwaiter to deliver food and other items if he requests, though he'll be eating dinner with the family later that night, as "You're part of the household now, best get used to it." He leaves to give Schäfer some privacy. Schäfer tentatively runs the hot water, then washes up, and it feels so good he nearly cries. He checks the dumbwaiter out of curiosity and finds that a fresh change of clothes, approximately his size, has already arrived, along with a pitcher of ice water and a light snack with a note from Inga about dinner later. He actually forgets about the run-in with Hesse for a bit, he's so overwhelmed with gratitude, it all feels like a dream. There's just one odd thing...while examining the dumbwaiter, he notices an irregularity in the wall, and realizes there's a hidden passage. He decides to say nothing about it.

Inga arrives to escort Schäfer to dinner, and explains that Hesse is a family friend, news which alarms him; she tries to reassure him that he'll cause no trouble, but Schäfer is understandably skeptical. Dinner goes incredibly awkwardly. Schäfer is invited to the family table; the Dobermanns are fine with it, Holt and the handful of other Wehrmacht guards who eat with them are curious but make no complaint. But then Hesse arrives, sees Schäfer, and is livid--so much so that Dobermann actually leaves the table to argue with him in the neighboring room. "I won't eat supper with some dirty Jew!" Hesse snaps, at which Dobermann curtly replies, "You're welcome to eat elsewhere, then." They stare each other down, then Hesse storms off, back to his room. When Dobermann returns and says Hesse won't be joining them, Schäfer is mortified; despite Dobermann's and Inga's protests, he insists on going to eat in the kitchen with the staff. Exasperated, Dobermann goes to Hesse's room to tell him, "You're free to come eat at the table, the dirty Jew granted your request and won't be joining us." Hesse sulkily returns and neither he nor the Dobermanns talk throughout the entire meal, Dobermann being angry and disgusted, Inga ashamed and embarrassed, Addy confused and uncomfortable. Meanwhile, Schäfer is welcomed into the kitchen with open arms, and the help staff ply him with so much food, including leftovers to take back to his room, that this time he does burst into tears, crying, "Vielen Dank, vielen Dank."

(Aside: Feel free to compare the dialogue and details here with Schäfer's entry, to see differences based on my faulty memory and developing events. Most of this, including the rest, is not set in stone yet, and I often prefer not to look back lest I get caught up in reading old entries.)

Hesse is left fuming over what to do. He does end up visiting Dannecker, who confirms Dobermann's story. When Hesse stresses that what he did was illegal and there could be consequences, Dannecker first looks surprised, then gets that trademark smirk of his and says, "And what are you going to do about it, Kamerad? I hear that last complaint of yours didn't go so well, did it?"* Dannecker is referring to an incident that occurred while Hesse was serving in the Waffen-SS, when he filed a complaint against his commanding officer for making a sexual advance; this of course went to the Allgemeine-SS for investigation, but after a few questions they refused to pursue the case, due to the high standing of Hesse's CO. Hesse ironically had to request a recommendation from his CO when he applied to join...the Allgemeine-SS, the same branch that turned down his complaint. Recalling how this went absolutely nowhere other than embarrassing him, Hesse decides there's no benefit in pursuing an official complaint against Dannecker or Dobermann, both of whom outrank him literally and figuratively, and he'll have to think of something else instead. Another strongly worded demand to Dobermann goes nowhere, and Dobermann warns him that he better not try again. Appealing to Inga is just as fruitless--she insists she has no say in the matter, and surely it's not so bad?--as long as he's on their property, Schäfer is causing no trouble. This gives Hesse an idea about the last feasible thing he can do: He goes to Dobermann and says that if he insists on flouting the law, Schäfer will have to remain on the Dobermann property only, and he has to wear the Judenstern, the yellow star badge, on himself at all times--"I can't protect you, or him, otherwise." This time, Dobermann is livid; but he doesn't argue, as he knows he's pushing his luck. He tells Inga, who asks to inform Schäfer herself; she sews a yellow star by hand and goes to tell him Hesse's demand. Schäfer has been agonizing about Hesse's presence--"He'll send me back to the camp, and you can't stop him"--so to hear that all he has to do is wear the star is an immense relief.

(*This is so weird, I could swear I already shared a version of this event, with different dialogue--Dannecker saying something like, "Go ahead and try, Kamerad, see how far you get"--but I can't find it. Hm.)

The situation takes an unexpectedly beneficial turn not long after when Hesse is seriously injured and Schäfer successfully treats the injury; he then makes the mistake of giving Hesse morphine. When Inga tells him why he shouldn't have done this, he's positive he'll be sent away. Despite Inga's suggestion that he leave Hesse alone now, he returns with a sedative--Hesse is already in withdrawal, shaking and sweating and miserable, and he weakly slaps Schäfer's hand away, saying, "No more needles!" Schäfer explains that it's nonaddictive and will help him sleep, and leaves it for him to take himself; when Inga arrives in the morning, she finds the syringe empty and Hesse sleeping soundly. He returns to the dinner table after a few days, and when Schäfer--who's been eating with the Dobermanns in his absence--starts to get up to go to the kitchen, Hesse urges, "Stay, bitte?" He doesn't address Schäfer after that, but also doesn't complain about his presence, and the evening goes peacefully. The ice between the two very slowly thaws, with Schäfer helping treat Gewitter when she comes down with colic, and Hesse even learning sign language to communicate with Schäfer, stomping his boot twice against the floor to get his attention when needed. The Dobermanns never would have expected it, but the two develop a cautious friendship, having to keep a certain distance out of necessity but otherwise getting along unusually well.

Dobermann couldn't have known the far-reaching consequences of his split-second decision to rescue Schäfer from Dannecker's camp. Not long after Schäfer goes to live with them, Dannecker is murdered in a prisoner escape; the ringleader, who executed Dannecker via his favorite intimidation method--Russian roulette--is Josef Diamant, a former jeweler-turned-document forger who was tortured by the SS and then imprisoned. It turns out he collaborated with Margarethe Dannecker herself to do the deed, and even stole Dannecker's dress sword for her, as a trophy. Dobermann is stunned by this news, but not too surprised; the truly surprising thing is how they pulled it off. Too bad Addy forgot all about that weird comment Gret made about a secret passage in the camp...now hidden, BTW, by a devil tapestry. In any case, Diamant and his fellow escapees soon become the core members of a budding but rapidly expanding coalition of former prisoners, refugees, partisans, and others persecuted by the Nazis, as well as sympathetic German citizens. Against Diamant's wishes this becomes known as the Diamond Network, and one of the things it takes the best advantage of is the systems of hidden passages within city buildings and Junker homes. They learn which Junkers are sympathetic to their cause and make contact, fixing up and expanding the passages to provide safe travel and exit into the countryside.

At least one of the smaller estates within walking distance of the Dobermann property grants the Network permission to use the house, so members often pass by the Dobermanns' land itself. One has the misfortune of stepping in an old abandoned trap and getting caught one evening. She has the good fortune of being discovered not by one of the Wehrmacht guards, but by Dr. Schäfer, who's strolling around the property edges...looking for old traps to disarm. He reassures her he won't hurt her, pointing to his Judenstern, and hurries back to the house to fetch his medical bag. The two of them manage to pry off the trap and Schäfer attends to the injury--the bone isn't broken--before letting her go with the promise that he won't tell anyone they met. She's the one who tells, and soon after, Schäfer runs into Diamant himself. I'm not sure if they were in Dannecker's camp at the same time, but either way they've never met, and since there's no good likeness available of Diamant, Schäfer doesn't know who he is until he explains--then it's pretty obvious. He thanks Schäfer for helping, and says there's another way he can help: By gaining the Network access to the Dobermann house. There's a significant gap in their version of the Underground Railroad and the estate would go a long way toward filling it in. Schäfer wants to help, but is terribly anxious; he loves the Dobermanns and doesn't want to get them in trouble. Diamant gives him some suggestions on how to go about doing it and minimizing the impact on the family--they don't have to know--so Schäfer agrees to try. His best bet is getting the help staff on board.

He joins the staff as they're working and chatting one day, and after some careful conversation is able to judge the atmosphere: Most of them seem disdainful of the Nazis (they often ridicule the estate's visitors) and sympathetic toward the Jews and other prisoners. Schäfer selects the most trustworthy seeming of them for a small private talk; he takes a risk and asks if they'd be willing to help funnel fugitives through the house, using the hidden passages. One or two of them are too nervous/reluctant to commit to anything, but they vow not to interfere; the rest are eager at the prospect. They offer to invite others on the staff who they believe will be interested, and plan a meeting for late one night to get everything in order to send information back to Diamant. They decide to call the meeting a "party," and not try to conceal it from the rest of the household, so as to not be too suspicious. By necessity, Schäfer can't attend, since he's not one of the help staff--he would bring too much suspicion on the rest. They agree to fill him in afterward, though.

The servants have their meeting--they know nobody like Hesse or Helmstadt will bother them, considering such a "party" to be rather beneath themselves--and draw up a tentative schematic of the passages they're aware of and how to access them. A house layout exists--Helmstadt keeps track of it--but it's incomplete, and the staff know of even more passages that aren't listed. They finish their work and prepare to take the schematic to Schäfer and retire for the night, but as soon as they exit into the hallway, they find someone waiting for them: Sgt. Holt. He looks them over and asks what they're up to. They stick to their story of a party, but he isn't buying it. "What exactly is the business you have going on with Herr Schäfer?" he asks--Holt is exceptionally astute, watching everything from the background, and he's noticed their conversations. The servants hem and haw, afraid and uncertain how to proceed; Holt sees the rolled-up paper and requests to look at it. They reluctantly hand it over and he studies it...then says, "You missed a few passages." He waves for the pen and someone gives it to him; he adds a few more lines, rolls up the paper, hands it back. "Whatever this is, you keep it quieter than you already have," he says. "If I found it out, Herr Hesse could, too." And he leaves.

The staff offer Schäfer the map, telling him what happened; he's incredibly anxious but passes it off to Diamant, letting him know who on the staff can be trusted, but also that one of the Wehrmacht guards found out what they're up to--perhaps the plan should be aborted. Diamant frowns but says they'll go through with it, after he checks the house out himself. He sneaks in successfully, slipping through the passages and rooms undetected, peering into a few rooms to see their contents (creepy, but he doesn't linger); on the map he locates Holt's room, and heads for it. Peeks in, sees the furniture and such. Slowly opens the passage, peers a bit further, starts to slip into the room--then freezes when the barrel of a pistol nudges against his head. Holt had heard him despite his best efforts, and concealed himself to the side as he peeked in. "Mind telling me who you are and why you're breaking into my room?" Holt asks.

Diamant: (hands raised) "I'm pretty sure you already know me."

Holt: "Enlighten me."

Diamant: "Maybe not my face but my actions?"

Holt: "I know you're good at being vague."

Diamant: "Well...your boss entertained a certain guest here a long time back, so I'm told; I made sure he won't be entertained again."

A pause, then Holt withdraws the gun. Yes, he's heard of Diamant. And he's smart enough to put two and two together: Diamant and Schäfer were both Dannecker's victims, so for them to be colluding makes perfect sense. The two exchange a few words and it soon becomes clear that Holt hasn't informed anyone about the staff "party" or the home layout. "You need to use the house?" he asks; "Use it for what?" Diamant says, to which Holt replies, "This escape thing you have going on, whatever it is. If so, you need to move around more slowly; these passages are old and creaky. If you're familiar with all the sounds of the house, you notice noises that shouldn't be there. I heard you coming a mile away." Diamant asks why Holt is telling him this. Holt replies, "I fought alongside men just like you in the war. I depended on you for my life more than once. I feel I should return the favor. Especially now that everyone else has forgotten."

So, okay: Holt is in.

It isn't too long before the Network is using the Dobermann house to funnel people through to the countryside and on to safety, though there are limits to what they can do, given how many people live in and visit the house; the numerous Nazi guests, and Hesse, make it necessary to be even more careful than usual and not take as much advantage of the situation as they'd like. They need another, even more powerful ally to ward off this threat, and they find it in Inga Dobermann herself.

Inga's been paying close attention to Germany's deteriorating situation, aided by the stories Dobermann himself passes on regarding what Nazi officials are telling him. He's obviously disapproving of what he hears, but doesn't seem to think he can do much about it. Inga agonizes over being so helpless; she wants to do something, even if her husband isn't on board. Dobermann bringing Schäfer home to live with them was a turning point--seeing his timid, emaciated state, his shaved head and dirty striped clothes, and especially the tattoo on his arm and the yellow star on his shirt, brought the severity of the situation home as well, made it real, instead of some vaporous rumor of things possibly occurring far away. (Despite his love for Addy, Hesse lies to and gaslights her CONSTANTLY concerning the Final Solution, and her admiration for him makes her believe everything he says. To hear him tell it, everything is fine, the trains that pass in the distance all the time are full of soldiers and war supplies, and the camps, well, they're just prison camps, and obviously the prisoners did something to deserve to be there. Even worse, she freely parrots all this to anyone else who listens.) Inga approaches Schäfer one day and asks if he can keep a secret; of course, for her, he can. She gives him her locket; within is a photo of her and Dobermann and Adelina. A look from her makes Schäfer remove the photo; behind it is a tiny Star of David pendant. "No one knows, except you," says Inga; "What about Herr Dobermann?" Schäfer asks, to which she replies, "Not him...not Herr Gunter, not even Lina. It never seemed important enough, until now." She briefly pours out her regret over living so safely and comfortably while others are suffering, and her wish to do something about it; Schäfer says nothing, as he's too afraid to. After getting everything out Inga wipes her eyes, signs, "I'm not sure why I'm putting this all on you, it's just you're the only one I know; I'm sorry," and gets up to leave. Schäfer finally finds his voice and draws her attention; when she looks back at him, he loses his nerve again until she says, "You said I could trust you, so you can trust me too, Herr Tobias." He hesitates, fiddling his fingers; then, instead of going into detail, he tells her to go visit her neighbor--make up a pretext for visiting--and ask to see the jack of diamonds. Inga furrows her brow, but he says nothing else, so she leaves.

This neighbor has no name yet but she shows up frequently enough that she'll get one soon. She's a young unmarried Junker who lives alone with her help staff within far but walking distance of the Dobermann estate, and so is the neighbor the Dobermanns are closest to, occasionally paying social visits. Like Dobermann, she expresses distaste for the Nazis, but doesn't go against the Third Reich. At least, it doesn't look like she does; secretly, she granted the Diamond Network full access to her property a while previously, and actively collaborates with Diamant himself. Schäfer hasn't interacted with her but knows of her through the Network, and knows she's trustworthy. Inga makes the excuse one evening to visit her (bringing along some of the estate's highly prized eggs); the head servant lets her in, asks her reason for visiting, fetches his mistress. The neighbor warmly welcomes Inga and invites her into the parlor, dismissing the servant and asking what Inga would like. Inga pauses uncertainly before saying, "I'd like to see the jack of diamonds." Instantly, the room seems to go cold--the neighbor's smile vanishes and she just stares at Inga. Uncomfortable silence draws out. She gets up and goes to close the parlor door, returns to Inga.

Neighbor: "Who sent you here? And why?"

Inga: "Herr Schäfer told me to come."

Neighbor: "Herr Schäfer? Your doctor?"

Inga: "Ja, he...we had a talk and he told me to come here, to talk to you."

Neighbor: "A talk about what?"

Inga: (flustered) "Why are you questioning me so much--?"

Neighbor: "He told you to say that?"

Inga: "The jack of diamonds? Ja, he did. May I see it?"

Neighbor: "What EXACTLY made him tell you that? What did you ask him?"

Inga: (distressed) "I wanted to help somehow." (hesitates, then pulls out her locket and shows Neighbor the Star of David) "Only you and he know! And I pray I don't regret it!"

Neighbor stares at the pendant a moment, then says, "Put that away. Away, away." Inga does so, believing Neighbor is disgusted and brushing her off, until she says, "Come back in two days. Same time. Come alone; make up an excuse like today. And you can meet the Jack of Diamonds." Inga blinks--"It's a man?"--but Neighbor just calls her servant back, cheerfully thanks her for the eggs--"I may have to ask for some more, soon!"--and bids her farewell. Inga leaves, more confused than ever. As soon as she's gone, Neighbor turns to Head Servant and instructs, "I need you to get in touch with Herr Diamant. Ask if he can be here day after tomorrow, ten in the evening. I know someone he might want to meet." "Frau Dobermann??" Head Servant exclaims in surprise, then hurries to do as he's told. Neighbor's entire home staff is also collaborating with the Diamond Network.

Inga returns two days later, though she's growing increasingly discouraged and anxious. Is welcomed in same as before, goes to the parlor. Neighbor isn't as cold as last time, but notices Inga's distress, and again asks why she's really there. Inga repeats what she said to Schäfer. Neighbor seems sympathetic, but Inga starts to balk when it becomes clear how much danger not just she but her husband and daughter could be put in as well, should she act against the Reich. As she's protesting, a voice behind her says, "You can still back out, if you'd like." Inga gasps and jumps up, whirling around; a figure is leaning against the entry leading to the next room--a tall man in an SS uniform. "You told--?" Inga exclaims in a panic, whirling to Neighbor. "I can't believe you told! I trusted you! What have you done--?"

Neighbor simply retorts, "You wanted to see the Jack of Diamonds!" Inga doesn't get to respond; the man in the SS uniform steps into the room, saying, "When I go out I have to go in disguise...I find this one's unfortunately effective." He sits down, removes his cap; Inga notices that, like her, he has dark skin, dark hair, dark eyes. "This is Josef Diamant," Neighbor explains; Inga looks from one to the other, mute. Diamant gestures for her to sit back down; she does, and he says, "I'm genuinely sorry for frightening you, Frau Dobermann." "You know me?" Inga says, to which he replies, "Of course we know you, and your husband. Watchman of the City. We've been interested in you for quite a while." He makes his pitch, about how if she wants to help, she can grant full access to the estate. Inga is dumbfounded to learn that not only Schäfer--meek, soft-spoken Schäfer--but most of her help staff, plus Sgt. Holt, are already involved. Why does Diamant need her help, then? So far, the Network has limited themselves to using the cellar passages to avoid run-ins with the estate's guests. If Inga were to get involved, she could not only notify the Network of when it would be safe to use the other floors, but deter the guests--and Hesse, the biggest threat of all--away from key areas at key times. As mistress of the household, she's secondary only to Dobermann in allowing access, and so for her to help out the Network would be considered a HUGE bonus. Inga is still iffy but Diamant points out how not only her life, but those of her husband and daughter, her help staff, Holt, Schäfer, and even Hesse--for bending the law in allowing Schäfer to stay with them (he's made a point to never mention this to his boss, the chief of SS intelligence)--are already in danger whether she acts or not: "You can turn around now, and go back to your comfortable life, and I won't fault you for it; nobody before now ever asked you to be a savior. But keeping your head down won't protect you forever. That was what people like me, and Herr Schäfer, used to believe, and look what happened to us--and we're the lucky ones. I guarantee you they'll come for you and your family and Herr Schäfer one day, and even your friend Herr Hesse won't be able to help you, if he even wishes to. I can't guarantee they won't find you out if you help me--but I can guarantee you'll be saving someone else."

Inga is agonized over all this, but finally agrees. Plans are made for her to provide the Network with information on when and where guests of the household will be present or not, so the Network can accordingly avoid or use nearby passages. Additionally, this means they're able to make small fixes to the creaky passages to make them safer and easier to use. They can use the passages on the ground floor as well, which is riskier but quicker than the cellar. (The upper floors are generally ignored as inconvenient.) Inga becomes adept at distracting people away from places the Network is currently using, though she does express her mixed feelings at deceiving her family and Hesse, whom she still considers a good friend despite Diamant's assurance that his opinion of her would change should he find out the truth.

The big unknown in all this is what her own family's reaction would be. Inga knows Dobermann dislikes the Nazis, and even the Nazi Party; but what does he think of the Jews? He did save Schäfer, and accepted him as a member of the household--but so did Hesse, eventually. And even while he's criticized the Third Reich, he still saw fit to associate with Dannecker for his own benefit, and hasn't expressed any interest in taking action against them. Inga has no idea how he'd react to finding out the truth. Adelina is especially complicated: Although not overtly hostile, she still fully believes Hesse's lies, and idolizes the SS, hoping to marry an officer someday. Inga knows Hesse could never accept who she is, but Dobermann and Adelina, they're complete question marks. Yet it doesn't look promising.

She gets the chance to find out abruptly one night when, walking through the halls, she's startled by a Nazi official who has no business being there--although invited in earlier, he never left, and was lost track of, during which time he's been furtively exploring the house, seeking access to the hidden passages they've heard so much about. Inga is expecting Diamant to pass through this part of the house soon, so to run into this guy alarms her even more than usual; she demands that he leave. Seeing that she's alone, he refuses, and in return demands to know where the passage is; her refusal to help makes him suspicious, and he pulls his gun. Inga makes a grab for it and he fires, grazing her arm--during the brief struggle her locket falls to the floor and pops open, the Star coming out so he gets a good look at it--she manages to get hold of the gun and yells a warning, but he charges at her anyway--"Filthy Jew whore!"--and she shoots him. He falls dead and just like that, the Dobermanns' lives instantly change.

Diamant is close enough to hear the commotion; he exits the passageway and rushes to the scene. Sgt. Holt was nearby as well; he also arrives, and they both stare at Inga and the dead Nazi in surprise. Holt, the most levelheaded of the household, starts to suggest what to do, when a noise draws everyone's attention--Dobermann is standing in the hallway, taking in the scene with a baffled look. He looks at the body, at the necklaces, at Holt, at Diamant, then at Inga--utterly confused.

It's late, and he'd just been in bed, reading and waiting for Inga to finish up what she was doing--she's had some odd habits lately, checking the house after nightfall, but he's not the suspicious sort. The two gunshots convince him to hurry to investigate. Finding not just Inga with a gun and a dead Nazi, but Holt, and this guy he doesn't even know, and Inga's locket with a Star of David next to it, he has no idea how to react. Holt acts, instead--he tersely says the Nazi was trespassing, and tried to attack Inga. The truth. Before he can fill in all the holes, though, a new voice whispers from the passageway Diamant exited, warning that the rest of the Wehrmacht guards who heard the gunshots are quickly approaching. (This unknown party is Lukas Mettbach, an associate of Diamant's who often creeps through the passages doing reconnaissance ) Everyone stares at each other for a second, then Dobermann steps forward, takes the gun from Inga, and shoves her at Diamant. "Take her," he says. "Safety." Diamant immediately understands, grasping Inga's arm and pulling her along after him even as she keeps exclaiming, "Louis--? Louis!" They disappear into the passage and Dobermann shuts it behind them. (Cue Lukas catching sight of Inga with Diamant and hissing, "What the--? What the f**k are you doing??") He turns back, drops the gun near the spatter of blood Inga left on the floor, and retrieves the necklaces. "He was trespassing and shot her, she got the gun and shot him, they both died," he says. "But her body," says Holt. "Her wish was her body be taken to her relatives," Dobermann says--it's a weak story which will raise questions, but it's all he has--they can hear the commotion coming. "But she has no other family," Holt says, to which he replies, "Here's hoping they don't know that. You handle the rest."

He heads off in the opposite direction--supposedly carrying Inga's body away. (In reality, he slips into one of the passages and leans against the wall for a bit, trying to collect himself--a feeling he's quite unused to.) Holt does what he does best, and takes charge of the disintegrating situation; the first to arrive is Private Helmstadt, who sees the body and asks what's going on. Holt sticks as much to the real story as possible, but has to explain why Dobermann supposedly took Inga's body away. He prevents the others from asking too much by issuing orders--the Dobermann house is now a crime scene, meaning the authorities have to be contacted. Helmstadt leaves to call Lt. Hesse, who's staying at his apartment in the city; he mentions an emergency at the Dobermann estate, involving a shooting and Inga Dobermann. Hesse, stunned, says he needs to contact his boss but will be there as soon as possible. It's after hours but Col. Heidenreich is still at SS headquarters; he offers to stay there while Hesse goes to the estate, and promises him all the manpower he needs to investigate. Hesse heads out alone to assess the situation; the drive is over an hour, including over some rough country roads, so it takes him a bit. Dobermann has "returned" by the time he arrives, and Holt gives him most of the details. As expected, Hesse is confused by the removal of Inga's body--"Why didn't you take her to Dr. Schäfer?" Dobermann insists she was already dead--"He's a doctor, not a miracle worker"--and reiterates Inga's last wish. "But...Frau Inga never told me anything about having other family," Hesse protests, to which Dobermann tersely replies, "Maybe there are things about her she never told you." Ouch. Hesse gives up on ironing out the details just yet, and promises a full investigation--except Dobermann requests that he keep it low key, to avoid drawing too much attention that could upset Addy (she's still asleep and has no idea what's going on yet). If there's a big fuss, all it can do is bring trouble to the family. Although bewildered and reluctant, Hesse agrees, and orders a couple of the guards to carefully bundle up the body and bring it out to his car, and make sure nobody messes with the rest of the scene until he returns in the morning. (Forensics isn't fantastic in my story.) He takes the body back to the city with him and hands it off for autopsy, reports to Heidenreich (he asks for discretion, and to be allowed to investigate with just one other officer of his choice, to which Heidenreich agrees--the officer he chooses is 2nd Lt. Paul Wozniak, who has a new name but is not a brand-new character, I've mentioned him before--and yes, I'll explain that surname eventually), then heads back to his apartment to try to catch a bit more sleep.

Hesse doesn't handle Inga's "death" well at all. He's still in love with her, and the situation hits him all at once now that he's alone; he breaks down sobbing and shaking. It's the worst pain he's ever felt, and it won't stop, so he tries the only thing he can think of to numb it; he rummages in his study and digs out the kit he keeps his morphine works in, which he's kept hold of all this time--not to use, but as a reminder NOT to use. Well, all that has gone out the window with this development, and he prepares the needle and is actually about to go through with it when his eyes blur over again and he can't see what he's doing. He breaks down crying again and manages to doze off. He awakens to a pounding on his door, sees the needle lying beside him, examines his arms and the syringe but finds he never went through with it; then goes to answer the door. It's Lt. Wozniak, who showed up when Hesse didn't report in to work; Hesse invites him in while he gets ready. While wandering around Wozniak spots the drug works and asks Hesse if he's truly good to go; Hesse confirms that he is, and they head out to the Dobermann estate to ask questions and collect what remaining evidence they can.

Ironically...Hesse ensures that the SS doesn't delve TOO deeply into Inga's death, thus protecting Dobermann and Adelina--who's since been informed of what happened--from scrutiny. He's not stupid, he sees the gaping holes in Dobermann's story, but he's not willing to dig too deep himself--he wants to protect Inga and Lina too, even though he doesn't know what from. Dobermann effectively uses his feelings for Inga to shield his family and keep Inga's secret--because he's not stupid either, as soon as he saw Inga's necklace on the floor, then heard Lukas call out to "Herr Josef" from the passageway, he understood exactly what was going on. He's heard of Josef Diamant and what he does. So he knows that not only was Diamant the only person who could shuttle Inga away to safety, but Hesse's cooperation is needed as well. So he sees nothing wrong with manipulating him like this. Addy, however...he doesn't know how to handle her. She's far closer to her mother than to him, so she reacts to Inga's "death" much as Hesse (privately) did, sobbing with grief that she didn't get to tell her goodbye. When Hesse finds out that Dobermann hasn't even attempted to comfort her yet, he's infuriated, confronting him and demanding that he step up: "She needs you more than ever right now! And what do you do but avoid her, like a coward?" This doesn't sit well with Dobermann, who snaps, "She's MY daughter, not yours! Don't think you can tell me how to be a father!" to which Hesse retorts, "Then ACT like one!" and storms off. Even with as much as Dobermann dislikes Hesse...this particular comment hits home. He knows he's right this time. He belatedly approaches Addy while she sits crying alone, and, unable to think of anything to say, puts his arms around her. She hugs him back, tight, and just sobs; although uncomfortable with the outpouring of emotion, he lets her.

Thanks to Hesse's interference, the Dobermanns escape intense investigation, with most of the attention falling on the dead Nazi himself. He's a minor player and Heidenreich declines to put much effort into finding a motive behind his actions, instructing the SS to leave the Dobermanns to grieve in peace; he even helps turn the guy into the scapegoat for trespassing and threatening Inga. The fine details, the holes in the story, are swept under the rug. Inga was well known and loved, and there's an outpouring of support for the Dobermanns, though they pretty much keep to themselves in the aftermath and are left alone. Hesse and Wozniak complete their cursory investigation and the case is quietly closed.

What happened to Inga...? Diamant transports her, weeping, to Unnamed Neighbor's house. Head Servant lets them in and calls her and Diamant fills her in on what's happened. He isn't comfortable entrusting Inga to anyone else; although it's risky to keep her so close by, Neighbor agrees to let Inga stay with her for the time being, since everyone in her house is in on things. She tells Inga (who's nearly inconsolable over not saying goodbye to her husband and daughter) she'll need to be disguised, and Inga agrees. Neighbor first cuts Inga's long black hair into a much shorter bob, Inga's eyes welling up with tears as she does so; it reminds her of what she's been told of the Jews who enter the camps. Neighbor then washes and bleaches her hair blond; Inga takes one look at herself in the mirror, puts her hands over her face, and starts crying. Neighbor recently lost one of her maids, so she brings out the maid uniform for Inga to try; it fits. She can't do anything about Inga's dark eyes or complexion, so it's decided she should try to keep her head down and try to remain unobtrusive when visitors appear. "It'll be all right," she tries to reassure the weeping Inga. "Your family's safe. And it won't always be like this. It has to change, sometime." Inga is unconvinced; she retires to her new bedroom to cry herself to sleep.

Dobermann, meanwhile, is left dealing with the remaining details on his own. Hesse does what he can to distract Addy from her woes while Dobermann tries to process what happened. Holt and the help staff are feeling quite anxious about the turn of events--now that Dobermann knows what's been going on, they're afraid he'll put a stop to their activities, and perhaps even report them since he's friends with members of the SS. At the very least, the loss of the Dobermann estate from the Diamond Network's escape route would be a devastating blow--especially if he then decides to grant access to the Nazis, instead. So when Dobermann shows up in the kitchen (the hub of escape activity), the staff fall still and stare at him nervously. He glares back at them for a moment--they're positive he's going to order an end to their collaboration--when he walks over to a pantry and opens it. He steps within, moves some storage items out of the way, pushes a shelf aside. The staff, who've crowded around the entry, are surprised to see a doorway here--no one, not even Holt, previously knew of its existence. Dobermann opens it and shows them the narrow passage hidden behind; "From now on, use this way only," he says; "The other may be compromised." He closes and conceals the passage again and departs; that's it, that's all he has to say. The help staff sigh in relief. Although Dobermann himself appears to want to play no part in it, the secret escape effort through his household will continue.

Dobermann is understandably quite pissed off when Diamant makes another appearance at his house, wanting to talk to him; Holt has to make sure he's not going to punch Diamant, or worse, before giving them privacy. Diamant explains what's become of Inga, to put any of Dobermann's worries to rest; Dobermann responds by just glaring at him. Somewhat nonplussed, Diamant starts to describe how he's heard of Dobermann allowing the Network to continue using his property, when Dobermann interrupts him with, "Tell me why it is you're here, before I throw you out." Diamant misinterprets Dobermann's hostility as antisemitism and says, "I understand why you may have issues dealing with me--" when Dobermann, seeing the misunderstanding immediately, again cuts him off with, "I hate you for taking my wife away from our daughter. That's the issue I have with you." So, now Diamant knows exactly where he stands (and suppresses a pang of guilt), and says, "Fair enough." He mentions how effectively Dobermann dealt with quashing the investigation, even ensuring the cooperation of a wildcard like Hesse; Dobermann additionally holds a lot of sway with the Nazis and the public, given his charitable donations and his association with Dannecker. (Diamant notices the way Dobermann wrinkles his nose at the mention of the commandant's name.) "Your point?" Dobermann says; Diamant replies that this is a charade it'd be beneficial for him to continue, for his family and for the Network: Despite the SS's (unintentional) collusion, there will still be questions from the other Nazis over the loss of one of their own, and there's already suspicion of Inga herself (later in the story, it's obvious at least a little of this is passed on by Heidenreich's wife, Eva). Dobermann's skepticism of Diamant's suggestion wanes as he listens and realizes he can't afford to sit back and do nothing anymore; but rather than actively push back against the Nazis, Diamant explains it'd be better for him to play nice with them as he'd already been doing--feign magnanimity should they apologize over Inga's death, befriend more of them, welcome them to his house (while keeping the Network apprised of when and where they'll be). While he's doing all this, it'll lessen any suspicions...plus he can gather information from them, which the Network can use. Dobermann makes no promises, doesn't agree to anything, though Diamant can tell the gears in his head are spinning; he readies himself to go, thanking Dobermann for at least allowing the Network to continue using his house, to which Dobermann responds, "That was for Inga. Now get out."

Diamant visits Inga to let her know Dobermann and Addy--and Hesse, and Schäfer (who, like Addy, missed all the drama and so isn't in on the plot)--are all right, but she's still crushed, assuming her own husband must surely hate her now. When Dobermann stops by to visit Neighbor and clear up a few details, she hears his voice and crouches in the stairway, peering down into the room but unable to go to him as it's still too risky plus she can't think of what to say. When she hears him leave, she hurries upstairs and to a window overlooking the path heading in the direction of the Dobermann property to watch him go. He just happens to glance back at the house, spots her, and stops, turning around. The two of them stare at each other. Then, Dobermann raises his hands, and signs: I LOVE YOU. Inga takes in a breath, eyes watering, and signs back, I LOVE YOU. Dobermann looks at her a moment more before turning and walking away. Neighbor finds Inga at the window and escorts her away in case anyone else sees her, but at the moment she doesn't care--finally she knows for sure. Dobermann doesn't care that she's Jewish, that she never told him, that she opened up his household to a world of trouble. He still loves her.

Although it makes his skin crawl, Dobermann takes Diamant's advice. When a Nazi official stops by to express condolences and promise such a thing will never happen again, he accepts the apology, and consents to a small group of them paying a visit to discuss things. Just as Diamant had predicted, they're so relieved not to have incurred Dobermann's wrath that their suspicions about the odd incident quickly fade; additionally, he makes another series of donations, including to a nearby Lebensborn maternity home, to further smooth things over. (He avoids donating to any overtly violent or propaganda causes.) The regular German citizens adore him (and the "deceased" Inga) as the benefactors of the city; the Nazis, believing he's on their side, praise him as a fellow traveler and benefactor of the Reich. And meanwhile, the Diamond Network knows the truth, that he's an informant for the resistance; among them, and despite Inga's background, they become known as Saint Louis and Saint Inga, or more cryptically, the King and Queen of Hearts. Despite knowing this, Network members also know they have to help maintain the facade, and so spread rumors about the Dobermann family's Nazi connections and murky bits of info about Dobermann himself possibly engaging in acts of violence. His largely reclusive nature only helps with this impression; nobody can say they truly know him.

This ruse works so well that when the Allied forces officially get involved, they can't tell for sure what Dobermann's true alliances are; he really does look like a benefactor of the Nazis. They send in a spy to try to get to the bottom of things: Stephen Gerhardt, seemingly a Wehrmacht sergeant who's been injured and requested an easy posting at the Dobermann estate while he recovers, in reality a Jewish American soldier who's already gotten a look at what the Nazis are up to with all those trains. He's instructed to establish contact with the Diamond Network while getting to know the members of the household and try to figure out why Hesse is even there. He gradually gets to know Addy, Helmstadt, honorary Wehrmacht member Senta Werner, and Nazi Wehrmacht visitor Wilhelm Volker, and after learning that Holt and Schäfer are connected to the Network, at last makes contact with Diamant, who thinks he's ignorant but grudgingly helps him out. He finds Holt, Schäfer, and Senta agreeable enough; Helmstadt is stiff and unsociable, Addy keeps a cautious distance and is hard to get to know, and Dobermann himself is near impossible to get a read on. Hesse rightfully distrusts Gerhardt, but ironically, Schäfer's vouching for him lowers his defenses somewhat. Volker is the friendliest of the bunch, being a new visitor to the estate and showing obvious interest in Addy...except she's developed a serious crush on Hesse since the loss of her mother, and rebuffs anyone else's overtures. (Although he still has unresolved feelings for Inga, Hesse has by now fallen in love with a nightclub singer, Sophie Sommer, and Addy spends her days moping over this, wishing she were fair and blond and blue eyed unlike her mother--she has no idea Hesse loved Inga as well.)

An aside here: Love is a complicated, messy theme in this story, with a few characters loving more than one person--Hesse harbors genuine feelings for both Inga and Sophie, while Inga herself loves Dobermann first of all, but later on also loves Josef Diamant; also to a lesser extent there's Lukas Mettbach/Gret Dannecker/Lukas's unnamed former love, and Klemper/Ratdog/Baswitz. I find this rather bothersome--unless it's a consenting polyamorous situation, I personally believe in monogamy--but I guess love just isn't that clean cut. Here's some dialogue from a WIP scene after Inga and Diamant end up together:

Diamant: "You have no idea, you have no idea how long I've wanted to do this. Dreamed of doing this. Ever since I met you you lay with me in all my deepest dreams at night, but the dream was never as good as the reality. To the ends of the earth I would've followed you, willingly, to do this, to make that dream real. A million times over."

Inga: "You had a chance, long ago."

Diamant: "No...I didn't. You still loved him then. Maybe even you still love him now. I think you do. I don't mind. I know feelings like that don't simply die when one's love is gone. Even though I've only ever felt that for one person. Especially for that reason. If you were to go tomorrow, I'd love you still. I'd love you always."

Inga: "I truly do love you, Josef."

Diamant: "I know. I believe you. And you still love him too. Life is complicated."

Anyway...Gerhardt has lots of trouble trying to get on Dobermann's and Addy's good side, and although the Network communicates with him, they don't give up what they know about Dobermann's true alliances as they aren't 100% sure they can trust him. A good deal of the story is spent on Gerhardt passing time on the estate getting to know the odd ways they do things (within the confines of the Dobermann property, it's almost like a safe neutral zone where the war isn't even occurring, with most of the guests not caring who is Jewish or Nazi or not, though there are rare exceptions like when Heidenreich pays a surprise visit and Hesse quickly hides Schäfer from him). He slowly gains their trust, though it's frequently in danger of being lost again, such as when Addy gives up her hopes of Hesse falling in love with her and she and Gerhardt end up together; Hesse is surprised to find Gerhardt in her room the next morning, and corners him in the hallway, promising to put a bullet in his neck if he ever upsets her. Somehow Dobermann finds out as well; all he does is give Gerhardt a withering death glare, but it's enough to cow him. There are signs, however, that Dobermann is letting down his own defenses just a tiny bit; at one point he invites Gerhardt to join him in the parlor away from everyone else, and briefly explains the role he's been granted by the residents of the city and how hollow it rings in the face of things (taking off his honorary watchman's hat as an illustration)--people like himself are becoming part of the past, obsolete, as newer viewpoints take over, and whether this is a good or a bad thing, he can't say for sure. It's a surprisingly intimate admission, though Gerhardt still isn't sure what sort of person Dobermann really is.

True allegiances at last start to become known as the war comes to a head and tensions rise even on the Dobermann estate. What tips off Gerhardt about where Dobermann stands is when he comes upon Gerhardt talking with Josef Diamant in the house; Gerhardt expects a confrontation, but all that Dobermann does is say to Diamant, "Get out of my chair." It soon becomes clear that, despite Dobermann's desire to remain reclusive, he and Diamant have had to remain in close contact all this time, with Dobermann reporting on what information he's gleaned from his associations with the Nazis and, like Inga, making sure they're kept away from Network activities under his roof. It's clear to Gerhardt now that Dobermann is no Nazi and no fellow traveler as even the Diamond Network's rumors say; pretty much apolitical, he's been collaborating with the resistance since Inga's "death," largely motivated by his desire for revenge for the Nazis breaking apart his family. (Though he's still pissed off at Diamant for that, too.) He'd suspected from the start that Gerhardt is an Allied spy, but of course couldn't trust him; one detail that began to convince him was the concern Gerhardt showed for Addy. As for Addy...she's a lot more complicated. Gerhardt tries to get through to her, to convince her that Hesse has misled her this entire time and, far from being the honorable person she's always believed he is, is actively involved in the slaughter of countless innocent people. Even if it's true, Addy desperately tries to cling to the story that these people aren't innocent, they betrayed the Fatherland and so surely deserve some of what they get--the SS is just performing a necessary evil. Gerhardt is frustrated trying to convince her otherwise, but growing evidence from numerous other sources such as Dr. Schäfer, Lukas Mettbach, and Maj. Jan Delbrück, adjutant of the labor camp (he runs into Addy at Sophie's nightclub and later on offers to let her see inside the camp as proof of what's happening--he's the one who informs her there's no way Hesse is ignorant of the mass executions, since the SS is behind them) starts wearing down her defenses. An uncharacteristically sharp rebuke from Dobermann himself when Addy mentions how Germany was betrayed--"There was no stab in the back. I was there, you were not. We simply lost"--hits especially hard.

Josef Diamant reveals himself to her--she'd actually met him before, in disguise--but she refuses to take his word; growing frustrated like Gerhardt, he invites her to Unnamed Neighbor's house to meet someone. Addy has no idea the "someone" is her own mother, who's been alive all this time, but what's more shocking is that she's Jewish. Addy had had evidence of this--finding the Star of David in Inga's locket, which she was given by Dobermann--but hadn't been willing to believe what it most likely meant. Her own mother telling her that she's part Jewish, too--plus Dobermann is guilty of breaking the race laws--is more than she can handle, and she flees. She doesn't report the meeting, but Inga returns instead to the Dobermann estate and runs across Dobermann; they stare at each other a moment before Dobermann embraces her, hard. Addy realizes that everything Gerhardt and Diamant have said is true--and not only her mother but her father was in on it all, too. It's overwhelming, but she doesn't have much time to dwell on it before Hesse arrives at the estate, and discovers that Inga is still alive--and is Jewish. (Gerhardt is just learning this, and so is Schäfer and everyone else who wasn't involved--so yeah, it's pretty confusing.) Although stunned to see his old friend alive, Hesse manages to warn the Dobermanns not to flee as he has to take them into custody. A dispute breaks out with guns pointing every which way; Volker gets wounded, and when Hesse hesitates to shoot when Addy jumps in front of her parents, Helmstadt attempts to shoot instead--although not a member of the Nazi Party, he still believes in the race laws, and finding out that fellow Junker Dobermann broke these laws infuriates him. Volker shoots him, and Diamant shoots Hesse, Addy crying out in grief. They hear additional Wehrmacht forces approaching and so the Dobermanns, Diamant, Gerhardt, and Schäfer escape through the passages while Holt, Senta, and Volker stay behind to try to protect the staff. (Senta's father, who'd previously socialized with Dobermann but has since been radicalized, had caught wind of rumors about Inga and tipped the Nazis off.) Diamant leads the group into the countryside and then into the foothills where Lukas catches up with them: He's rounded up the horses from the Dobermann stables, and hands them off--Addy cries when she's given Gewitter, Hesse's Waffen-SS mare. Diamant then puts Gerhardt in charge and departs with Lukas to help the Network; now able to move faster, the group heads into the mountains. Dobermann has traveled here before and so leads them to a small mountain town he's familiar with, which has largely escaped the attention of the Nazis; they decide to remain here until certain that the situation down toward the city is stable.

Their stay becomes permanent. Gerhardt manages to get news of what's happened in their absence: The Dobermann estate was overrun by the Nazis, but Holt's, Volker's, and Senta's efforts delayed them enough to successfully protect the staff; the three fled, splitting up along the way, but have all survived, with Volker and Senta picking up her mother (leaving her turncoat father behind) and ending up together. Holt surrendered, but the Network vouched for him, and he made himself useful by translating for the Allied forces that overtook the city. Most of the SS forces that remained, such as Hesse's associate Master Sgt. Theodor Schulte, were captured or killed; those who were smart, like Wozniak and Delbrück, escaped early and disappeared, presumably going into hiding. (Heidenreich had been killed some time before, by his wife and her lover, who were executed and committed suicide.) Sophie, learning of Hesse's death, committed suicide. Unnamed Neighbor and the other Junkers who assisted the resistance were guaranteed safety and allowed to keep their property. The commandant of the labor camp and Dannecker's successor, Lt. Col. Hasso Reinhardt, turned off the electric fences and opened the gate, then waited for the Allies to come capture him; those prisoners who were too weak/sick to flee on their own were rescued while Reinhardt was taken into custody (he later goes to prison). (Americans reach the city first in my version, even though I've read that IRL they liberated none of the camps; not sure if that's true.) Following the final defeat of the Third Reich, American forces are left in control of the city; unfortunately, Diamant was captured by remaining SS forces shortly before this happened and forced on a train to be transported to one of the remaining camps for extermination. It's a painful blow which hits the Dobermanns especially hard, considering everything he did for them over the years.

Dobermann is still considered a hero by the majority of those in the city; the Network lets the truth out that he actively aided the resistance against the Nazis, and the Allies permit public recognition of this. The city folk dedicate a memorial to him as Watchman of the City, though Dobermann himself declines to leave the mountain town to attend; he never cared about public recognition, all he cares about now is his family, which gains a member when Gerhardt and Addy decide to marry. Addy requests one thing, that "von Dobermann" remain part of her surname, so the family name won't completely disappear; Gerhardt agrees. When Dobermann hears of this he says nothing, though the look on his face makes it clear the gesture has touched him.

The Dobermann estate is left, temporarily at least, to the remains of the Diamond Network, to deal with handling remaining refugees; the help staff feed and supply them. Gerhardt and Addy are wed in a small ceremony in the mountain town; a few days later, a package arrives, addressed to Adelina Dobermann. Inside are two beautiful golden rings and a playing card--a jack of diamonds. Addy and Inga are elated: Somehow, Josef Diamant survived, and has sent a belated handmade gift. Some time later he comes to the mountain town himself and sets up a small jeweler's shop to replace the one the Nazis destroyed; Gret Dannecker comes to work for him, then eventually Lukas Mettbach as well. Dr. Schäfer, meanwhile, bids the Dobermanns a bittersweet farewell; now that it's again safe for him to merely exist, he decides to return to the city to see all the things he's missed. He promises to visit and keep in touch, and removes his Judenstern, giving it back to Inga: "It feels strange without it, like going without a cover on my head...but I don't need a security blanket anymore." He thanks the Dobermanns for everything they've done--"You're truly the family I never had the chance to have, and you will always remain my family"--before leaving.

...Now...why, earlier, did I provide a story excerpt where Inga and Diamant are together, when Dobermann survives the war and he and Inga and Addy are reunited? The reunion is only temporary, and in actuality the Dobermanns have only about a year or so left together; this detail hits me hard, Dobermann went through so much, spent so much time apart from his beloved Inga, that it just doesn't seem fair that it barely lasts. 😞 But thus goes the story. After entering Diamond Network custody, while confiding her fears to Diamant, Inga kissed him; Diamant broke the kiss only reluctantly, saying, "You're a very beautiful woman. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't... (*trails off*) But I know you love your husband. And I know you'd never forgive yourself if we went through with this." Ashamed, Inga never tried again. Fast-forward. Some time after the war's end, a rumor reaches them that a Nazi medical experiment, known as Project Doomsday, did not end with the war--a handful of Nazis fled to the Alpine Fortress, taking with them the notes left by the SS doctors, and have been continuing the project under a new name, Ultima Thule. Gerhardt and the others had actually come across evidence of this while fleeing to the mountains, when the Waffen-SS forces they encountered along the way proved to be almost impossible to fend off; they'd assumed they were under the influence of methamphetamine, but this is something far worse. Doomsday's original goal was merely to increase a person's strength, intelligence, and stamina, to create a sort of super soldier; Ultima Thule's goal is to achieve immortality itself. When Gerhardt, the Dobermanns, Diamant, and Lukas head to the Fortress to figure out what's going on, they learn that the immortality part of the project is already well under way: While retreating, the Nazis took Hesse's and Helmstadt's bodies with them, and now here they are again, seemingly alive and well.

They don't directly respond to or even seem to recognize their former associates, however, and just blindly attack whenever the group runs across them. Eventually the Allies figure out that this version of immortality lasts only as long as the brain is intact, which explains how to kill a super soldier (and explains why someone like Schulte, who was shot in the head, wasn't included in the experiment); also, there's a drug that counters the hypnotic effect, restoring Hesse's and Helmstadt's consciousness. Helmstadt is still every bit a racist Nazi-ish a-hole who keeps attacking them afterwards, though when Hesse "wakes up," he's bewildered and confused, especially to learn that the Third Reich collapsed quite a while back and most of his comrades are dead or missing. Learning of the deaths of Schulte and Sophie is exceptionally painful, and his reaction is to assume that this leaves him obsolete, with nothing left to fight for; plus, being confronted by the Dobermanns, now that he knows who and what they are and remembers how he acted previously, racks him with guilt; he still hasn't let go of all his old bigotry but he's seen enough for it to be crumbling at the edges. (Even while alive, he'd seen the growing corruption and hypocrisy in the SS and had been planning to leave them in favor of marrying and settling down with Sophie.) He especially hates the impact he's had on Inga and Adelina (the formerly affectionate, adoring Lina cringes away from him now), so he doesn't care if anyone kills him or if the project succeeds or fails. He just wants to not exist anymore.

Gerhardt convinces him he may in fact have a reason to help them terminate the project. Hesse has a strange recollection of when he died, which includes a period of darkness, fear, and confusion that felt like it went on forever, followed by a dim vision of what looked like Sophie, standing in the sunlight looking back at him. Although he lost most of his own faith long ago, Gerhardt theorizes that this might not have been the dream Hesse thought it was. If there's at least the slightest chance Sophie is waiting for him somewhere, wouldn't that make helping them out worth it? Although skeptical, Hesse finally agrees, though he states that more than for himself, he wants to repay Inga, and especially Adelina, for the way he harmed them. He joins the rest of the group as they navigate through the mountain fortress, at one point at last telling Inga the truth: "I loved you once...for a long time. I never said. I knew you didn't feel the same. And that was all right, as long as I could call you my friend." Inga quietly replies, "I always knew."

With Hesse no longer leading them, Helmstadt assumes command of the Nazi soldiers defending the project. They thwart every attempt to reach headquarters to destroy the project so it's determined that the only way to put an end to it is to destroy the Fortress itself. This involves making and strategically placing explosive devices, which is easier said than done; while Dobermann and Diamant are attempting this, they're attacked, and both end up sliding down to the edge of a cliff. Diamant tries pulling Dobermann up higher, but all this does is drag him further down. He ignores Dobermann's demand that he let him go or else both of them will fall and they won't be able to finish placing the explosives. After a few seconds of arguing, Dobermann pauses, looks down, then looks back up at Diamant, his eyes afraid but resolved. "Look after her," he says. "What--?" says Diamant, confused--when Dobermann suddenly twists Diamant's right hand, which suffered nerve damage when Dannecker stabbed him long ago. Diamant lets go without meaning to, crying out as Dobermann disappears from sight--then he too suddenly slips and starts to go over the edge when something grabs his other arm. Looking back, he finds Hesse holding on to him; Hesse manages to pull him back from the cliff, and they sit staring at the darkness for a moment. Diamant opens his hand and looks at it, then holds it toward Hesse, dropping something in his palm; it's Dobermann's wedding ring. "You give it to her," Diamant says; "It'll mean more coming from you."

Inga and Addy are understandably grief stricken when the two return without Dobermann. Hesse returns his ring and Inga crumples to the ground, Addy with her. They don't have much time to grieve however as someone has to manually set off the detonation--they can't time it, lest Helmstadt find and disarm it first. One of them will have to remain behind. Lukas volunteers, as he has no family--"You f**kers killed 'em all," he says to Hesse. (Hesse had nothing to do with Lukas's clan being killed, but he did get a large group of Lukas's fellow Sinti sent to their deaths, as revenge for Lukas attacking him previously.) Something seems to click in Hesse's head, and he volunteers instead. Addy tries to convince him not to--"I already lost Papa, what'll I do without you, too?"--but he's resolved. (I should point out that even if he returns with them, he'll be executed anyway. I don't think this occurs to Addy.) "You've all grown up," he says; "and you grew up right, despite me. Take care of your mother now, ja? She needs you."

Lukas is skeptical of Hesse's promise to set off the explosives--and presumably kill himself at the same time--but Diamant and Gerhardt take a risk in trusting him--"I know it won't undo everything else I did, but even if it's just one small right thing..."--and they leave, fleeing the Alpine Fortress to make their way back to the foothills. Hesse stays with the detonator. As expected, Helmstadt arrives and first attempts to talk Hesse out of doing what he's doing by convincing him that the continuation of Project Ultima Thule can usher in a Fourth Reich, even more glorious than the last. "It's over! It's done with. We're the ones who are obsolete. We're the Untermenschen," Hesse says, which enrages Helmstadt and he tries to attack. Both of them are on the experimental serum, so their strength and reflexes are enhanced--Hesse is physically stronger and more experienced, while Helmstadt is younger and in better shape. Hesse briefly manages to lock Helmstadt out of the room the detonator is in (he keeps looking at his watch, then at a clock on the wall, to make sure he gives the group enough time to escape safely), but Helmstadt eventually breaks in the door, positively berserk with rage, and attacks again--Hesse tries taking the brunt of the blows to distract him from the detonator, which begins weakening him considerably. (The blows, not the detonator. Heh.) When Helmstadt compares his betrayal to that which led to Imperial Germany's defeat, Hesse loses his temper and, to his own surprise, yells, "There was no betrayal! No stab in the back! I was there, you were not. We simply lost!" He notices the time and makes a move for the detonator--Helmstadt prevents him from reaching it, but only temporarily, and he at last shoves down the plunger. A faint rumbling comes from far off, in both directions. "What have you done?" Helmstadt cries, and runs. Hesse sits by the detonator and listens with growing fear as the rumblings get closer and louder, bits of the icy ceiling and walls starting to crumble and fall around him. The rumblings quickly grow into a cascading roar. (Out in the passageway, Helmstadt sees the collapse heading his way and turns to run back, only to find it coming at him from that direction too.) Hesse looks up as a loud CRACK sounds from above; seeing the ceiling split open and then come plunging down at him, he shuts his eyes and whispers, "Sophie."

Outside, heading to the mountains' edge, the group hears a muffled boom, and they turn to look back. They watch silently as more booms sound to both sides, drawing closer to the center point where they left Hesse, puffs of snow rising into the air each time part of the Fortress collapses. When the final, midsection implodes, Inga and Addy cover their faces and weep, Addy murmuring, "Papa...Uncle Gunter." "I can't believe he actually did it," Lukas admits. After a pause, Gerhardt and Diamant urge them to keep going in case of avalanches, and they slowly make their way back down out of the mountains.

Earlier, while they were trying to get information on Ultima Thule and had established contact with the ground via a radiotelegraph system they found in the Fortress, several other allies and members of the former Diamond Network, including Gret, Schäfer, Senta, Volker, Holt, and Trudi Detzer (this last party, while not a core member of the Network, had a bit of knowledge about the project as an SS doctor she'd been involved with was active in its development), had gathered at the Dobermann estate to await news. At one point Schäfer stiffens and stares off into space; "What is it?" Holt asks, at which Schäfer says, "You didn't feel it?...the world trembled." He tries to brush it off as just his imagination, but the others share a look. A good while later, Gret, watching through binoculars, reports seeing the group returning--"Herr Dobermann isn't with them," she adds, ominously. When the group finally arrives, exhausted and discouraged, they confirm that while the project is almost certainly done with for good, Dobermann (and Hesse) gave his life to make it so. Schäfer and the help staff are devastated. After clearing up the final details, Inga and Addy decide to return to their new homes in the mountain town, for now leaving the estate as it is, in the hands of the Network which is still helping victims of the Nazis get back on their feet; Inga will make sure the staff continue to be paid and the property maintained, though she can't bear to stay there without Dobermann.

Addy and Gerhardt accept an offer from Schäfer to pay a brief visit to the city: "There's something I'd like you to see before you go." He leads them to the city square, the same location Hesse and Delbrück dueled in long ago. There's something that's new since Gerhardt's last time in the city, prior to its fall to the Allies: A statue, bearing the legend Wächter der Stadt--Watchman of the City. It's Dobermann, wearing the cap he once told Gerhardt was so symbolic yet meaningless. Enthralled, Addy returns to the estate and begs her mother to come see before she returns to the mountains; Inga is reluctant, but she goes. The sight of the memorial brings tears to her eyes. She'd intended to just quietly return to her new home and aside from paying the staff, leave all management of her husband's estate to the Network; but the statue sparks a memory, how Dobermann had also wanted to just be left in peace, to not get involved, yet had to, because of her. She arranges further charitable donations to the city, to help with the ongoing post-war cleanup, various victimized groups who need assistance, and the same hospital Dobermann had donated to following the Great War. The recipients of the donations are surprised--with Dobermann's death, they'd had no reason to expect any ongoing help--but Inga makes certain it's so, if only to keep her husband's legacy alive in some way. Once this is sorted out, everyone parts ways, and the Dobermanns and Gerhardt return to their new homes.

Despite Dobermann's own final request to "Look after her" (as perceptive as ever, he'd noticed the way Diamant and Inga acted around each other), Diamant never tells her of this, and decides it's for the best if he lets her go and they move on with their lives. He lives in the same town, at his new jewelry shop with Gret as his assistant, and says an occasional hallo when he and Inga happen to cross paths, but that's it. Lukas visits the town while taking an odd job (traumatized and missing his old itinerant life, he prefers to keep on the move) and berates Diamant for not following through; he goes to visit Inga himself, and tells her that it wasn't Hesse who lost hold of Dobermann, it was Diamant--and Dobermann had told him to look after her. Inga has long had feelings for Diamant, and he for her, but aside from the single kiss they shared years ago--which Diamant cut off, and Inga agonized over ever since--they never once acted on them--she wonders how Dobermann even guessed. She goes to visit Diamant, and the scene quoted above takes place. Inga then asks why he never told her about Dobermann's request.

Diamant: "I know. I believe you. And you still love him too. Life is complicated. Your husband was a good man. I'm sorry it took us all so long to see. Probably that was his intent, to protect you and Addy. Maybe he never could have truly understood you, or us, but he was a good man nonetheless."

Inga: "I know. I still miss him. I'm sorry...I thought I was ready for this."

Diamant: "It's all right. I...I can give you some space, if you need. You can stay in here and I can go to the den..."

Inga: "No. It's fine. Bitte, stay. You have far more reason to grieve than I do."

Diamant: "I don't see it that way. You lost your love; I still have mine."

Inga: "Yet you lost everything else you had, everything and everyone you knew. They even tried to make you lose yourself. My life has been comfort compared to yours. I had a visitor a while back. He called himself Lukas. Said he knew you, from the Network and from the camps. His eyes were so strange, brown and blue, and so tired and sad. He had numbers on his arm same as you. He told me what Louis had told you before he...before. He told you to look after me. Why did you never say anything? Why did you never come for me?"

Diamant: "I knew you weren't ready. And I don't believe I was, either."

Inga: "Would you have ever come for me? If Herr Lukas had never spoken up? I never would have known. I would have remained in your dreams only, forever."

Diamant: "You needed time to mourn. I'm not sure how long I should've waited. I didn't want to overstep. I'm wondering if I did, anyway."

Inga: "Of course you didn't. Bitte, I only just found you again, Josef. Don't go."

Diamant: "I'm not. I just...I'm not good at this. Never have been, but the past several years have made it even harder."

Inga: "You're doing fine, to me."

Diamant: "Even if the two of us understand each other...there's just a lot I'm not sure you can ever understand. No one can, unless you've been through it, too. I didn't mean to get into this. I'm sorry."

Inga: "It's all right. I don't mind. If you ever feel like telling me anything..."

Diamant: "This is just it. I'm not sure I could. Do you think that's something you could live with? Someone with a side they can never tell you about. Not really because I wish to hide it from you. But because for some things, there are just no words. At least, none I can think of."

Inga: "That was sort of the way things were between Louis and myself. Except I was the one without the words."

Diamant: "Ja, well...I'm not sure it's quite the same. Forget it for now. I always planned to come looking for you, I just...didn't know when. I guess I owe Lukas for that."

And that's where the writing leaves off, for now. Inga and Diamant become a couple, even though she never does fall completely out of love with Dobermann; I do believe he's her true love, which even Diamant acknowledges and accepts: "I know feelings like that don't simply die when one's love is gone."

I don't know yet if Gerhardt and Addy ever have any children, but whether he has heirs or not, Dobermann's best-known nickname, at least, lives on upon the statue down in the city square. He never fights in the second war, but dies a hero anyway.

I had him figured out COMPLETELY wrong all those decades. Sorry for doubting you, Dobey.

[Louis Dobermann 2022 [‎Friday, ‎October ‎28, ‎2022, ‏‎4:15:36 AM]]

[Louis Dobermann 2022 2 [Friday, ‎October ‎28, ‎2022, ‏‎4:15:45 AM]]

#artists on tumblr #ibisPaint x #SketchDaily #original characters

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sooniesspot · 3 years ago

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Coming Down | myg

Okay, so here's the second installment of my BADLANDS Series. This is loosely based around Coming Down by Halsey. I realise I haven't really done them in a specific order, just the one I am pulled to next to write.

Warnings: Dom!Yoongi, Sub!Reader, mentions of slight work stress and societal pressures of being a woman, you know. All that good stuff.

Reader is a F E M I N I S T and proudly so. Loose mention of not wanting kids (which is fine btw) this is just a whole load of smut, not much fluff as it's FWB but.

Okay so, oral, f & m receiving, face fucking, fingering, multiple orgasms, rough sex, light spanking, choking (for like a milisecond) use of ties, slight sensory deprivation, slight body worship, overstimulation. Slight name-calling?? Yoongs says kitten ironically. Use of safe word/safe signal. Yoongles has a Sir Kink. (I can only apologise) Reader has a hand kink (obvs) just wants to get off and relieve stress, Yoongi is happy to be their relief.

word count: 9.8k 👀��☕ don't @ me

'I found God, I found him in a lover'

It was a normal Thursday evening, you'd finished work at 6pm on the dot and took the bus home. Fishing for your keys as you approached the front door of your apartment. Key in the lock, turn. Open. Silence. Walking into your hallway, slippers not quite on the rack by the front door as you rushed out of them into your heels this morning. Just where you left them. Sliding off your heels with a sigh as you trudged into your slippers, immediately comforted by the soft memory foam that supported your tiresome toes. Returning your heels to the rack. Shrugging off your bag and long coat, reaching nearly 2 feet above you on your tiptoes to hang your bag and coat on the coat rack. Muttering to yourself like you did every day. 'Coat and bag, then heels. Won't have to stretch so much.' Venturing into the living room. Magazine on the coffee table infront of the sofa where you had left it last night.

Empty. Not that you expected anyone to be home. No one making you dinner you didn't want, or taking up the whole sofa, or hogging the remote. You lived alone, and you liked it. Sure, for a pretty young girl in her mid twenties you often had looks and questions.

'When are you going to find the one?'

'When will you settle down and have a family?'

And truth be told, you didn't want to settle down. You had told your mother from a young age that you didn't want children, whether that would change over time or not you weren't sure. It hadn't changed. You still wanted your independence and that was okay. Women were not put on this earth just to bear children and you were the firmest believer in that. You liked your life just the way it was. A job you loved that you worked hard for, an apartment you were proud of and nearly every night you got to sleep in your own bed, alone, no one to whine at when they snored or your body being used as a warmer for their cold feet. The few nights you were away from your bed came from your once in a while rendezvous with an acquaintance of yours. Although you knew eachother more than mere acquaintances should.

You met at a bar some time ago. Lights flashed, sure to give you a migraine and music so loud your eardrums could burst at any given moment. You were dragged out to this stingy bar by your bestfriend in her attempt to finally get noticed by that one guy. Even in her twenties she was still as smitten as when you were both back at school. You wore a simple black dress with a low cut front, skirt just above the knee and plain black heels. Hair not much different to your everyday, maybe a few waves here and there and some more mascara than your normal work volume. Trying your best to blend in but still having the ornate ability to have eyes on you in any setting.

You spent a lot of time on the dance floor until your friend had found her prey and you circled around the bar. Much rather wanting to stay at home with a tub of ice cream and your cat watching some terrible reality show about Cabin Crew on a cruise ship. Shouting at the TV to throw the nasty woman overboard; waving your spoon at the screen as your cat looked on in understanding almost. But here you were, slumped against a sticky varnished oak bar, propped up on an old velvet stool, twisting your straw in your glass, nonchalantly spinning the steadily melting ice as you listened to your friend talking to her guy. Suddenly feeling a hot hand against your lower back and someone lean over the bar between you and your otherwise occupied friend. Looking up at a pale man to your left.

" Whiskey on the rocks. " came his order to the bar tender; sharp, leaving no room for anything blasé.

Catching his eye, he looked you over once with a subtle bite of his lip and the flick of his tongue at the seam of his mouth; eyebrow raised with a lingering smirk before he vanished into the sea of people again with his drink.

Dumbfounded, you sat there, staring at the now empty spot where he had been mere seconds ago, the now cool expanse of your lower back where his large hand once was, fizzing. Swinging round on your stool, propping your elbow on the bar behind you, your eyes scanned the room. It wasn't the biggest bar. It wouldn't take long to find him.

Soon you caught eyes with him across the dance floor, stood with his taller, tanned friends as he held the whiskey glass firm in his hand; talking amongst themselves. Dark Brown, almost black hair feathered across his forehead, just above his twinkling chocolate eyes. Thin upper lip pressing to his plumper bottom lip before perfect white teeth graced your vision in an endearing gummy smile. Eyes still not catching you between the bodies of people dancing. Several silver hoop earrings in each ear. He wore a long black sweatshirt, black ripped jeans and boots. A couple of silver rings adorned his strong fingers.

You took a sip of your drink, gaze intermittently fluttering in his direction as you scanned the room, your friend had left to go and dance. Eyes found her and you nodded, knowing she was fine. As your stare focused back on the man before you he finally looked up, catching your eye with his, dark and mysterious. His lips pulling into a smirk again as he gazed at you. Heat bubbling in your chest from his wandering eyes on your body through the gap in people on the dance floor. He eventually made his way over to you and whispered a few words into your ear. Cool and calm.

" Come back to my hotel. "

And so you did. One slightly drunk, intense one night stand later and here you were, 6 months down the line sleeping with eachother whenever he was in town. A classic Friends With Benefits situation, although you weren't really friends.

You walked into your kitchen, greeting your ginger tabby cat with a kiss as she meowed at you in greeting. Grabbing yourself a glass for water and pouring kibble into her bowl on the floor, your routine monotonous but you didn't mind. Your cat tucking into her dinner as you filled up your glass, taking a sip. Looking at delivery menus on your fridge under old magnets from previous travels, deciding on Chinese; plucking the menu from the fridge, you had a training day for other colleagues at work tomorrow which meant a day off for you. No needing to cook dinner and get an early night tonight. Placing your glass and the menu on the coffee table in the living room, you switched on the tv, chucking any random show on then bumbling along to your room, opening the door. Greeted by quiet and serenity. No dirty pants on the floor or unmade bed. You smiled with contentment, unzipping your dress to pool at your feet before tossing it into your wash basket. You looked at yourself in the mirror, your most dependable black bra and panty set glaring back at you as you fixed your hair into a ponytail and wiped off your makeup. Throwing on a sweatshirt and some leggings. A short while later you plopped yourself down on the sofa and switched on the tv, greeting your cat with a scratch under her chin as she sauntered into the room, hopping up on the sofa with you.

Zoning out to the world around you as a terrible drama played on in the background as you glanced over the menu, not really paying attention to anything in particular. You had been a little stressed over the past couple of weeks, mounting pressures of a new senior in your department threatening to change everything you had sculpted into a balanced working environment over the last 3 years. Societal pressures and backhanded compliments from your mother's 'garden party' friends concerning whether or not you were defective in choosing a man. Or having one choose you. But in reality, the truth is, you had a stable relationship previously, unfortunately he was a dick and you're not stupid. So the single life had been your rather quiet reality for the last 18 months. No one to answer to or to worry about. Just you and your cat.

Your mothers friends never seemed to understand that, always too engrossed in whether or not you had a man on top of you every night to see that their husbands had found other, much younger women to be on top of. All of this filtering through the crack in your hardened shell, filling your mind with alternate realities until you got a text coming through. Cutting through all the fuzz that piqued in your brain. Picking up your phone, you saw who it was. Him.

'I'm in town, come over?'

Your reply was short and sweet.

'Sure, be over in 20.'

Snapping out of your previous thoughts and placing the menu back on the coffee table you sat and pondered for a minute. This was fine. This was what you needed. To let off some steam, in a judgement free setting. No cold glances your way, or harsh words uttered, unless it was you being tied to the headboard again like you had been convinced to try last time with his unadulterated gaze looking down at you writhing underneath him. The thought alone had your hair standing on end and a shiver running through you as you stood from the sofa, heading to your room.

Sifting through your wardrobe to pull on some old trainers, checking yourself in the mirror not really knowing why. In your hallway you made sure the lights in the apartment were off and your cat was happy, tucked up in the corner of the sofa snoozing away. Making sure you had your keys and phone in your bag, you left, key in the lock, turn. Locked. Walking down the hallway and down to the ground floor, heading out of the building to head right. The hotel he always stayed at was only a block or so away so the walk was relatively short. The sun was setting now as it hid behind the skyscrapers that canopied the city. Passers by making their way home or even to work. Still lots of cars on the road and bicycles that weaved in and out of traffic. The breeze was light and cherry blossoms danced in the air, separating from a tree as you passed a nearby park. The air was cool, as it would be in early May. Not too hot. Reminded of your journey, that first night.

'When his hair falls in his face and his hands so cold they shake'

You had left swiftly after his original proposition, making up some story about your cat or an early work meeting or something. Anything to get you out of there and with him. His hand returned to the small of your back as you left the bar, being ushered into an awaiting taxi outside. Shuffling all the way over to the other side, he slid in next to you blurting out the address to the hotel at the driver. Hair falling in his face. Eyes wild as they sparkled from the reflection of the dim streetlights. Smirking at you as the same powerful hand you had grown accustomed to on your back, made a home on your knee, slightly tucked under the skirt of your dress. It was now cold to the touch. Strong and intimidating as the taxi started to drive away. Not being able to take his eyes off you he leant forward and whispered in your ear.

" You look so delicious. " His voice low that reverberated through you, straight to your core as he squeezed your knee. Uttering the last syllable with a kitten lock to the shell of your ear.

To this you bit your lip and shifted uncomfortably in your seat. His hand, in turn sliding further up under your dress to the wider expanse of your thigh. The material of your dress pressing his hand taught against your skin.

He swooped down to your ear again, pressing an open mouthed kiss under your ear before he whispered " can't wait to taste you. "

You keened away from his grasp to no avail. He knew what he was doing to you, breath shallow and flighty in your chest as his teeth tugged at your earlobe.

"Please " You breathed, the first word you uttered to him.

Not really sure what you were pleading him for but the fire in your chest and the dampness of your panties flourished an urgency within you that was incorrigible. He smirked again at this, eyes dancing like Fireflies in the night. The hand that was to his side while the other hid between your thighs came up to cup your cheek, turning your face towards him.

"Soon. " He chuckled before biting your lip.

Drawn back to reality, passing people and cars. Your trainers pulling you towards your destination as your head had an argument with your feet. Was this a good idea? You didn't want to get yourself into a situation where either of you caught feelings. You were a pro at being a cold hearted bitch now but the odd sincere glance your way, especially from him seemed to melt your resolve, even just a little. Recounting the previous times you had taken this walk and what it would lead to.

After your first night with him, it was like a drug. You always wanted more. To say he was good in the bedroom was a complete cop out. He was...He was something. Made you feel things you'd never felt before and noises you'd never in your wildest dreams imagine yourself making. At decibels only a dog could hear. So once the addiction started, you started seeing one another everytime he was in town. Sometimes a couple of times in a week. That went on for a solid 4 months and as work pressures mounted, you fell distant. Always busy catching up with work or having some alone time with your thoughts and your cat. He also got busy, having to travel more for work. You didn't really know much about except it was important and you felt based on the guitar he always packed with him, propped up against the wall in the corner of the room, it was something to do with music.

'I found a devil, I found him in a lover'

The last time you had seen eachother had been a little over 2 weeks ago. That night you'd stayed, which didn't come easily. You were adamant you would leave as soon as you'd cleaned up, even telling him so as he helped you wash in the bathroom, almost requesting a second round when he looked at you through the mirror with those sparkling brown eyes like the devil, but you had been so wound up and pushed to your limits that you felt sleep take you as soon as your body hit the mattress again. Memories of restraints, dark water colours that created the murky palette of his hotel room and the low thumping of your heart, even as you entered the apartment, seeing him there, a tie in hand and a coy smirk. That night he had called you. He never called.

" You busy? " He sounded gruff like he'd just finished working out - which you knew not to be the case.

"When am I ever busy? " You rebuttled with a laugh.

He joined you, then you could hear him grin down the phone. A different sort of grin. A devious one.

"I wanted to try something. "

There was quiet, you wished him to continue silently.

"Something I can't stop thinking about doing to you. " He whispered lowly.

Your ears on fire and furiously red in the face you hung up. Chucking a quick 'omw' text to him in return. That night had been the best sex you'd ever had. That's why you'd stayed. For fear of walking into oncoming traffic at 2am because of your disorientated state.

Your heart skipped a beat at the anticipation of what was to come once you knocked on the door and it sent a thrill through you. Rounding the corner you were met with a bleak grey concrete block of apartments that made up the hotel with a black sign. Crossing the street after looking both ways you jogged up the steps as you saw the door beginning to close after a couple just exited. Sliding in you headed straight for the elevator.

He always had the same hotel room which avoided any confusion. You ran to the elevator that had just opened and pressed the 7th floor. Alone again your mind wandered to your first night here, in this lift.

You'd both stumbled out of the taxi and shuffled over to the lift, he pressed the elevator button furiously as he got impatient; leaning against eachother. As soon as the lift doors were closed he pressed you against the wall, face millimetres from yours as his nose skimmed over yours. Both of your breathing, laboured and slow. His large hands roamed your body; your waist, up and down your thighs. Gripping at the flesh as if he owned it. You wanted him to. God you wanted him to own all of you in that moment. Gaze intense and unwavering as the mysterious glint in his eye grew. His hands slid around the curve of your ass which made you stutter, giving it a harsh squeeze that made you lose your breath.

"I'm gonna ruin you." He whispered devilishly in your ear as he bit the shell.

Pulled out of your reverie as the elevator doors dinged open, signalling you had reached your floor, face burning as you stepped out of the lift, cold fingers pressed to your cheeks to try and cool them. Preparing yourself for what man would greet you at the door. You never knew which one you would get. Sometimes he was ravenous and you never made it to the bed, lipstick smeared and tights ripped as he never had time to waste when he felt such a desperate need for you. Or you would get the cool calm and collected man that caught your eye that night all those months ago. That was, until he got you here. Alone with him.

Walking down the corridor to his room now, counting the doors as they seemed to go on for miles, dark in wood with numbers etched in gold with golden handles. Your breath starting to slip away from you as you imagined as soon as you opened that door you wouldn't be able to breathe steadily again for a while. Room 93. (Shoutout to Halsey's first EP) There it was. You slowed to a stop, almost nervous to knock. 'Just knock' You muttered to yourself. Rolling your eyes as you fidgeted on the spot, sighing as you raised your hand to knock on the door. Knock. Wait. Silence.

You were waiting for a little while which was unlike any other time. Checking your watch and the door number. You waited a little longer and you were just about to walk away when the door opened slowly. You turned; met with the same dancing brown eyes you caught in yours all those months ago, although slightly sunken, maybe he hadn't been sleeping well? His lean frame propped up against the door. Arms folded over his broader chest. Hair fluffed over his forehead, slightly damp. Pale skin flawless and glowing against the dark background of his hotel room and the darkness of his simple black tee and sweatpants. Silver hoops still adorned his ears and rings still glistened on his beautiful hands. Eyes unwavering as they honed in on you. Smirk playing on his thin lips.

"You're early." He mumbled all knowingly, looking at the rings that adorned his knuckles, as if he were about to connect them with a wall.

You stuttered, heart in your mouth as you gawked at the man. Feeling like a naughty school girl that was about to get a ruler spanked across her a-. You stopped the thought for fear of collapsing in the hallway. His eyes still on you, looking you up and down. You mentally slapped yourself for your attire. Sweatshirt and leggings. Not sexy in the slightest. Anyway. Why did you care? Not like you wanted to impress him, right? After another beat his strong arm pulled you in the room by the collar of your sweatshirt, closing the door swiftly behind you and pinning you up against it.

"Just means I have more time." He whispered against your lips.

Sweeping strands of hair out of your face delicately, tucking his fingers behind your ears. He smiled at you, his gummy smile. You never thought that smile would be directed at you. Let alone in this setting.

'With his lips like tangerines, and his colour-coded speak'

His lips moulded to yours with a sudden urgency. Teeth and tongue caressing your lips with power and want. Heavy breaths exchanged as you dropped your bag; hands trying to find purchase somewhere sturdy and stable. Deciding upon the strength of his arms. Eyes closing as you were swept away in the moment of teeth and tongue and pent up tension and wanton need for eachother. His fingers pulling out your hairband so your hair pooled around your face. His fingers lacing through the soft locks as he grinned against your lips. Always having an ornate infatuation with how silky your hair was. How good it felt wrapped around his fist as he fucked you into the mattress. How it spread out behind you like waves across the crisp white bedsheets, framing your face perfectly as you slept.

He missed this. Maybe he missed you. Jolted back from his sweet thoughts, hearing you start to mumble against his lips as he continued to pin you up against the door, your head firmly in his hands.

"Yoongi." You murmured again, slurring the word slightly; drunk off the potent lust he cradled you with.

He never let up from your lips, intent on breathing you in. Hands untangling themselves from your hair as his cool calm hands landed on your shoulders, moving you away from the door to pin you to a wall, nearer to the bed. An eventual destination set in his mind. He couldn't get enough of you. Your hands travelled to cup his cheeks. His lips dry against yours gaining moisture from the saliva rolling around in your mouths as your tongues fought. Small whimpers beginning to swim their way into the air. Music to his ears. Of all the music he'd ever had a hand in creating, he wished he could emulate your tiny whimpers. Your cries for more of him. All of him. Wanting to devour him whole.

"Fuck" He exclaimed, finally pulling away from you, heavy breathing as his forehead was against yours.

Not even giving you time to breath he reached for the hem of your sweatshirt, pulling it over your head to reveal your gorgeous body to his hungry eyes. Knowing now that hiding from his gaze would be futile. An attempt at covering up would leave your ass raw and marks all over every single inch of your body. God's above. He made you feel like the only girl in the world, to him you practically were. He never sought out for any other attention or company from other women. The taste of you as often as he could have you was more than enough to satiate his heart.

He made quick work of your bra before throwing his own shirt off onto the growing pile on the floor. His hands, rough against your soft, plush breasts as his thumbs circled around your pebbling nipples. His teeth latching onto your bottom lip, humming as he looked into your steadily closing eyes. Teeth venturing south along your jaw to your neck and collarbone as he began to grab at the skin of your waist after he finished moulding your breasts; as if trying to memorise the feeling of them in his hands. The weighted comfort he had grown to adore about your chest. Teeth sinking in, enticing low gasps and the tiniest of squeaks as he would bite too hard on already sensitive flesh, intent on getting every inch of your skin covered in small indentations from his teeth. Tongue lascivious against the contours of your neck and collarbones, sickly sweet taste of your skin that drove him wild.

'Now we're lost somewhere in outer space, in a hotel room where demons play'

All you could do was pant and mule against him, your hands in his steadily drying locks. Suddenly pulling away as he untied the drawstring of his pants.

"Knees, now." He whispered authoritively and you happily obeyed.

Flicking your hair off your shoulder you sank down onto your knees. Eyes ignited with a fire he practically stoked out of you. You admired his body on the journey down. Body lithe and pale, defined arms and chest with a flat stomach, no six pack or defined v lines that led to the promising tent that you saw in your line of sight. Just a small happy trail of hair from below his belly button sneaking into the hem of his sweatpants. Swiftly taking them down and off you were greeted with black boxers, looking tight around his cock cased within. You licked your lips in anticipation as his fingers forked through the hair on your scalp. Looking up to his face as he gazed down at you with a stern look in his own eyes; burning into your already flushed skin.

"Someone looks like they've missed this." He smirked as your hand rose to palm him through his boxers.

He released a low hum at the feeling of your hand cupping his balls. You knew that he was very sensitive there, from past experiences.

"Does the slut want my cock?" He asked, a feather of a chuckle rumbled in his chest at your immediate nod as you ran your tongue over the seem of your lips.

Your fingers delved underneath the fabric as you began to pull them down. Sudden slap to your hands had you shying away from him.

"Hungry sluts have to wait don't they, kitten?" His eyes zeroing in on your reaction to the pet name.

You gritted your teeth in vague annoyance at the name, after the first night, you told him you had to be home for your cat. Finding it oddly adorable you were a cat lady he called you kitten ironically, now it's stuck. Your eyes looking away from him, turning your head slightly towards the large window that showed the rest of the city. Twinkling lights now shining in the moonlight. His hand gripped your chin, pulling your attention back to him, forcing you to look up into his devious eyes.

"I don't think you answered me, slut." He snarled; releasing your chin from his grasp.

Your heart jumped in your chest. "Y-yes, sir."

He smirked again, feeling triumphant he patted your head, thumb smoothing over your hair line with ghost like touches before running it along the seem of your mouth, popping his thumb in, flat against your tongue. Closing your lips around him, beginning to suck, big eyes gazing up at him.

"Good girl." He whispered before removing his thumb from your mouth and yanking his boxers down and stepping out of them.

His fingers danced through his damp hair as his cock sprung up against his stomach, a muted groan as the cool air touched his reddened and straining cock. Your eyes widened, never getting used to the sight of his cock, inches away from your salivating mouth, making your panties pool with a carnal need for him to be inside you. Your hands began to rub up and down your jeans clad thighs, waiting with baited breath for him to give you the command. This man and the things you'd do for him would have others question if you were a feminist or not. How a strong single woman with a steady career and bustling social life could want to be so utterly defiled by a man and be at his every whim really flipped your ideology on its head. But a drug was a drug, and you were high on him like cocaine.

"Alright, stop giving me those bedroom eyes." He gushed, dominating voice faltering as he gazed down at you, waiting and ready for him to let you begin.

You fluttered your eyelashes at him, big and bold. Biting your lip as your hands rubbed along your thighs again.

"Fuck, just get over here." He laughed, holding the base of his cock in his hand as your hands slunk up his sturdy pale thighs.

Fingertips sending sparks through his body. Your lips reaching his tip, you looked up at him again as you kitten licked his bulbous tip, testing it. Like testing a car. He hissed to which you smirked. You took your tongue to lick the underside of his cock lightly, teasing his frenulum before swirling your tongue round his tip several times. He puffed out a harsh breath but never said a word, fingers beginning to weave into your hair with a softness you were unfamiliar with. Surrounding the tip with your lips as you slowly sunk the head into your waiting mouth. Giving kitten links to the underside again as you sucked on his tip for a moment. Yoongis breath was heavy, you could tell by his chest moving, half lidded eyes looking down at you as you took more of him in slowly. Tongue still licking everywhere you could. Your other hand still positioned on his thigh as you rubbed small circles in it with your thumb.

Starting to take him deeper in your mouth and pulling him back out for breath had him seeing double. His vision was blurred as he could feel your heavenly lips wrap around his strained cock, precum and spit starting to pool at the corners of your mouth; threatening to spill as you bobbed your head back and forth on his dick. Setting up a rhythm you plunged him in deep so your nose touched his abdomen and he threw his head back with a grunt; gritting his teeth.

"Uh, fuck. Your mouth is so good" He whispered into the air.

'I've got a lover and I'm unforgiven, I'm such a fool to pay this price'

Your mouth worked on him as well as it could. You would take a lot of him in and proceed to gag which made him grunt. As your hand began to work at the base of his shaft. Giving him your all. Making up for lost time.

"Fuck, I'm not gonna last." He hissed. His hands in spearing through your hair as his thumbs rubbed at your scalp.

"I should've kept my hands to myself... Always impatient." He chuckled menacingly to himself; shaking his head.

Your breath was heaving as you pulled back from him. Hands gripping his thighs tight as you looked up at the man towering above you.

"What do you say, will you let me fuck your mouth like a good pet?" He asked, hands still in your hair.

"Make me cum, then it's your turn? How about it, kitten?"

No hesitation in your eyes as you gazed up at him as if he had hand painted all of the stars in the sky. You nodded profusely and he grinned at you; swiping the spit away from the corner of your mouth with his thumb.

"Good girl, remember your safe signal?" He asked, almost sweet in his tone.

You tapped the back of his thigh 3 times with your finger and he nodded. Feathering his fingers through your hair again, your hand still at the base of his dick lining him up to your waiting mouth. You gave him the go ahead as he thrusted shallowly into your mouth at first. Finally in your mouth his hands speared through your hair behind your ears to hold you still as he began to move his hips back and forth. You had done this before. Let him do this. But this time was so raw and so needy you honestly couldn't fathom how much you needed this. And it wasn't even your turn. He began to set up a rhythm working his length deeper with every thrust; starting to make you gag as you tried your best to relax. He breathed in sharply, his head thrown back as he pumped in and out. His shaft gliding smoothly across your tongue and beginning to slip down your throat as you sputtered around him. Hands firmly gripping the back of his thighs, the same way he was gripping your hair.

"Fuck, fuck. Your mouth. Kills me." He mumbled to himself; thinking you couldn't hear.

You looked up at him, a picture of bliss. Arms locked in place, keeping you still as he slid in and out of your mouth, picking up speed now. The veins in his neck; protruding under a velvet blanket of Frosted skin. Teeth gritted and brows furrowed. He looked down to see you already watching him. To this he groaned deep within his chest at the sight of you so willing and ready for him. Setting his nerves alight he could feel his orgasm approaching. Gripping your hair even tighter as he gave you a moment to breath before jackhammering into your mouth with a low whine.

"Fuck. Holy shit." He whispered before you felt his cock twitch deep in your throat and thick ropes of cum travel down it as he came; hips jerking at weird angles as you noticed sweat beading across his neck and collarbones; reaching up to his hairline.

After he had composed himself he pulled out of your mouth and you swallowed everything still left in your mouth before opening your mouth to show it was empty. He ran a solid hand through his own hair before he pulled you to your feet; planting a heavy kiss to your lips as he walked you back towards the bed. Practically pushing you back on it with a soft bounce. He suddenly rounded to the other side of the hotel room rummaging through a suitcase. Soon returning with several black ties in hand. Giving you a knowing smirk. You felt your stomach sink at the memory of your last adventure with this man. In this hotel room. With those ties. But judging by the look on his face and the fact his previously lifeless cock had begun to spring to life again; you knew it was different.

'I found a martyr, he told me that I'd never'

He began to move you up the bed to where he saw fit. Nodding when he had got you where he wanted. Straddling your waist he grabbed an arm tying the tie around your wrist to then loop it around the headboard. He soon did the same to the other one. Then finally you saw him gazing down at you from above before he slipped a soft silk tie over your eyes fastening it behind your head. Everything went black, but you could hear him; feel him. All around you. Feeling weight either side of your head you suddenly felt breath over your nipple; squirming at the sensation and your clothed pussy clenching around nothing. You felt him kitten lock his way along your breast before landing an unexpected bite against your neck, causing you to pull against the restraints with a sharp intake of breath.

"Remember your safe word, kitten?" He whispered in your ear.

You nodded. "Seesaw."

He sat back on his heels; still straddling you. Crossing his arms with a nod.

"Why is it Seesaw, again?" You ask, a grin sliding onto your face.

He chuckled at this before you felt weight lifted from the bed. You skin crawling with goosebumps as you waited with anticipation. Suddenly feeling deft fingers pulling your leggings and panties down in one swift movement. A beat of silence. Feeling like forever until you felt the same fingers, calloused but oh so soft against the skin of your collarbone.

"You don't remember?" He whispered into the darkness.

You shook your head no as your body began to squirm. Feeling his finger trail delicately down to your chest, followed by his other pointer finger on his left. Circling your nipples in precise motions. You sucked in a breath and your back arched as you felt him blow cool air onto the perking bud.

"Oh kitten, it was the bar where we first met" You could hear the smirk evident in his voice as his fingers trailed underneath the curve of your breasts.

"The night I took you home and ate you so good you nearly passed out." A dry chuckle left his lips at the gasp that left your own.

He began to drag his sturdy fingers slowly; tantalisingly, in soft motions towards your belly button where he would branch out with delicate touch; placing more fingers on your skin as they circled your hipbones. Finally sloping down to your thighs where his grip became firm and he pryed your legs apart to expose you to him. Heat flashing across your face as you whimpered at the action. Oh god. The things he made you feel. You felt electricity surge through your body, bouncing off your bones as you heard him hum.

"Mmmm. So wet, just from sucking my cock, kitten?"

You bit your lip with a whine; nodding profusely. Blush creeping across your cheeks. He seemed to like this as you heard a deep rumbled in his chest in approval. You could feel the bed dip slightly due to transferred weight. Right between your legs. Shit. If only you could see him. What was he doing? Was he pleased? Oh fuck, you didn't shave your le- your thoughts were far removed as you felt lips across the inside of your thigh; just above your knee.

"Shit, I can't wait to taste you." He whispered; sending cool air rushing up to your core.

Feeling his lips drag effortlessly along your thigh to where you wanted him most; needed him. He was tender; savouring the moment. He had missed this, giving you what you wanted. Watching you underneath him. Tasting you; devouring you. That's why he was so quick to cum the first time around. Too excited by the thought of having you again he had started to touch himself in the shower. Thinking of your soft, sweet body; Bending to his every whim. Your mouth stuffed full of his cock. Your enticing wet pussy that always made you blush at the sounds it would make, as he would fuck you. Hard and rough. He groaned at the thought before his face was level with your heat. Soft breaths that made your body wriggle; desperate to escape and want more; all at once. He hooked your knees over his elbows as he held your legs down. blowing against your exposed clit and watching your pussy clench around nothing; glistening with your essence he hungered for.

'With his educated eyes, and his head between my thighs'

"Mmmm. Sweet pussy baby girl." He kissed the apex of your thigh watching you writhe against the restraints. He hadn't even started yet. You were in for a long night.

You didn't seem to notice the name at first. It wasn't what he had called you any of the times before. But as the air thinned out around you; feeling the silence weighted around the room like a thick curtain and nothing was corrected, it almost felt affectionate; coming from his sinful lips that had just attached themselves to your-

"Fuck." Your breath caught as you threw your head back against the mattress.

Feeling lips suckling against your clit with vigor. He knew what you liked and knew how to get you where he wanted you. His tongue began lapping at your clit as his lips sucked where they could. Your breathing was heavy and you tried to pull against the restraints; your legs restless as the odd whimper left parted lips. His eyes although you couldn't see him, were focused on you. Watching every bite of your lip, every salacious moan or whimper; every gasp. You began rocking your hips in a rhythm against his tongue and he moaned at the pressure you posed against him. Trying to feel some friction as his throbbing cock had sprung to life from your first whimper; sandwiched between his abdomen and the mattress.

"God, this pussy is so good." He moaned; muffled by your legs trying so hard to clamp around his head as he continued his ministrations.

Soon enough you could feel the familiar rope spread throughout your body, begin to coil; tight as a spring before you felt a nip to your clit and you unravelled underneath him. Feeling weightless and weighted all at once. Stars beneath the blanket of the silk tie; delicate against your eyes. Head thrashing around as arms pulled with all their might against the restraints. Your back arched as you moaned loudly; legs starting to shake at the force of your orgasm. But that wasn't the end. He flicked his tongue against your swollen clit with more intent. Determined to push you through another orgasm before he even started using his fingers. God his fingers. Your lower body began to lift off the bed as his grip on your legs only got tighter.

"Fuck, fuck Yoongi. Oh my fucking g-"

You heard an animalistic growl as you felt another nip to your clit; yelping at the sudden spark of pain amongst your pleasure.

"Sir. Stick to the rules." He punctuated with a slap to your clit. Back arching for a moment as you felt a pulse throughout your body.

"Or I'll keep biting." He mumbled the last part.

You pouted. "Yes sir." You could feel your orgasm beginning to ebb away as he took longer to return to your clit.

You whined and you felt breath on your clit again as he chuckled. Although your predicament was purely casual. Wanting to get off essentially was your main goal. Neither of you ever rushed. Enjoying one another's company. Feeling his slick, swift tongue dancing along your clit again you moaned; trying so hard to keep quiet out of respect for neighbours as you tried resting your mouth against your arm to muffle your high pitched moans. His tongue retracted until you felt the tip of his tongue tease the edge of your entrance before dipping his tonulgue in for a moment. Your hips bolted you forward at the intrusion before settling back down on the bed. His tongue running up and down from your entrance to your clit in long strokes. Quickly settling his tongue back against your throbbing clit. You yelped as he applied more pressure.

"Fuck, I love this cunt."

Slurping noises ensued as he dove in deeper. You orgasm building again and again, holding on for dear life. Holding onto your sanity. His tongue swirling around the pulsing bud as you continued your previous rhythm rocking against his face. Your knuckles were turning white at the sheer grip you had on the ties; feeling yourself drift away.

"Fuck, please, yoo-"

He pressed his face even further into your heat as you cried out in pleasure. Tongue flicking mercilessly over your engorged clit. Reaching the summit again to fall all the way down into the abyss. He never let up from you as his tongue lapped at your juices spilling from your entrance. Nerves alight and pulsing throughout your body. A thin layer of sweat was evident against your face, collarbones; the whole of your body. Sweat beaded from his own forehead and he wiped the back of his hand over his mouth as he watched you regain your breath. Stilted in the silence. Only your chest rising and falling as your lungs gasped for air.

He loosened his right arms hold around your leg and brought his fingers forward to your sensitive pussy. Humming to himself as he gathered the Juices on the tip of his fingers and spreading it all over your pussy as it glistened in the dim hotel light. Knowing how much you lost your collective shit over his hands he couldn't help but watch his hands tip toe up to your breast; squeezing the flesh roughly in his hand before slinking it over to massage your neck for a second. Only to grab it a moment later. Your breath caught quite literally as you could feel the bed move from where he was sitting up. He could feel the pressure against your soft skin and the way your breath constricted; only for a moment as he loosened his grip. His fingers still flush against the skin. His veined hand looked like it belonged around your neck. He thought to himself before sliding his thumb into your mouth again; which you accepted with enthusiasm.

'I found a saviour, I don't think he remembers'

"One more from you, kitten. Then I'll fuck you. Okay?" He hummed.

Your reply was noncommittal as you nodded vehemently; still sucking on his thumb. He looked down at you with a certain adoration. Laying there, naked for him. Tied up and blindfolded. If he'd have thought this would be the case after that first night, he would have laughed. But here you both were.

His fingers began to trace the outline of your entrance; whisper like touches that made you clench around nothing. He began experimentally pushing his long slender middle finger inside you a little; chuckling lowly as you let out a whine. Your pussy trying to suck him in further. Wanting to feel him. All of him.

"Sir. Please." You murmured, legs that were now free from his grasp allowing you to rotate your hips.

He wanted to tease. God. He wanted to tease you until the sun came up. But he was desperate and so were you. He removed his finger earning a cry from you. Until he slid in two fingers to your shock and set a brutal pace. Feeling those godly fingers of his curl into you. Moulding you perfectly to him. Tapping against that sweet spot inside. He used his other hand to press your hips to the bed; preventing movement as you felt a touch of sensitivity kicking in. But you put it to the back of your mind; focussing on the way his fingers were drilling into you at an inhuman pace now.

Your senses heightened due to his silk tie that blocked your view. Oh how you wished you could watch his fingers sliding in and out of you like you had done countless times before. Acquiring quite the affinity with the mans hands. Pale, veiny; strong in their ability to hold you but soft when he caressed your cheek, wiping the spit away from the corner of your mouth or the pad of his thumb sweeping away tears from overstimulation. God you loved them.

"Fuck. I'm so close." You cried out, to someone. Anyone who could hear you as he continued his ministrations.

"Yeah? The slut loves my fingers doesn't she?" Yoongi spat; his voice laced with venom.

"Loves my fingers fucking her, huh?"

All you could do was mewl as you could feel your body going into overdrive. Your head slamming against the pillow as you could feel yourself near the edge. Just needing one final push.

"But you love it best when my hand's around your throat. Isn't that right? Slut?"

You hadn't felt his hand move. Too lost in the pleasure he was giving you. Until you felt it grip your throat. Not hard. But just enough. Squeezing when he said slut. Sparks flew and your fingers and toes felt as if they were set to a light simmer. Your body going numb at the feeling and your pussy throbbing as you came. A high pitched moan of his name left your bitten lips as he continued thrusting his fingers in and out of you. Body moving in time with your spasming cunt as you began to feel the overstimulation kicking in, rearing its ugly head once more. The pain was excruciating as he continued but the pleasure washed over you again as your entrance continued to clench around his fingers. Silence as a moan caught in your throat. This had to be the biggest orgasm you had ever had. Nerves set alight with matches and turning into a forest fire that exploded like gasoline until it set to a simmer when Yoongi slowed his fingers down ever so slightly. Enamoured by your head thrown back and your mouth in the perfect shape of an O. He would've cum right there, just at the sight of you convulsing beneath him.

"Cause he's off to pay his crimes, and he's got no time for mine'

"Fuck, me." He breathed, shaky breaths too.

Quickly flipping you onto your front, your still tied arms now crossed over one another. Propping your legs up so you were on your knees. A sharp smack to your ass sent you reeling into another sobbing mess. Beginning to plead with him. For something; anything.

Soon enough you felt his hands returning to your hips and ass, caressing them carefully. Your ass flinching at the contact of his lips on your lower back, you could hear a slight slapping sound behind you, assuming he had started to touch himself again. You whimpered at the thought of not being able to watch his veiny hand slide up and down his equally veiny cock. Fuck.

His lips still against your skin as he whispered "I nearly came just like that, watching you cum all over my fingers baby."

There it was again. Baby. Nothing more nothing less. There was a pregnant pause before he sighed, beginning to speak again.

"You're so fucking hot" a groan sounded as the pace of his hand quickened against his length. The slapping sound intensified.

You whimpered, beginning to move your ass up and down, wiggling it at him to invite him in.

"Yoongi, just fuck me already." You whined.

A sharp slap sounded against your ass, reverberating through the room. You winced at the pain, taking in a quick breath before a hand returned to your ass kneading it in his palm.

"Slut is so impatient today. I'll fuck you, don't worry." His words were menacing.

'Now we're lost somewhere in outer space, in a hotel room where demons play'

His hand continued to knead at your reddening cheek before pulling it aside with his thumb, showing your dripping, waiting entrance for him. He almost lost it. Almost. Deciding that you had both waited long enough he lined his throbbing condom clad cock up with your entrance and pushed in with great speed. Hissing at the feeling of your tight wet walls surrounding him.

"Oh god." You managed a strangled whimper into the mattress.

Breath caught in your throat as you could feel his dick beginning to move swiftly inside you. His hips slapping against your ass that was sure to bruise tomorrow, your wrists were aching, your body going numb to every other feeling apart from the feeling of him ploughing into you. Your vision was starry eyed and you hated it. But you loved it. Sobs began to rack through your body as he spanked you once again, sending waves of pain and pleasure through you.

His pace continued as all you could do was lie there with your hands tied, begging for anything he was willing to give you. But also feeling the familiar sting of too much. But it was never too much. You willed your body to continue on. To not give up the ghost yet. You prayed for your body to fight on. To take every thrust he battered into your throbbing, weeping pussy.

The coil you had almost forgotten existed now in the plains of numb, vacant ability to even string a sentence together, began to tighten again, expecting a fraying spent body, not one this eager for your umpteenth orgasm this evening. Your pussy clenched as he continued, hollow groans you imagine him with his head back as he thrusted into you, licking his perfect lips with that sinful tongue. God, he made you crazy.

"Yoongiiiiii, fuck I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum, please" your tone indescribable as you panted for breath that escaped you with every thrust as his skin continued to slap against yours.

Suddenly feeling him pull out which almost made you weep but being turned back over onto your back, the tie being ripped from off your head. You were greeted by a furiously sweating Yoongi. Sweat dripping from his dark chocolatey hair just above his eyes. His lips swollen pink from where he had probably been biting on them so much, not to mention when he had used the same lips to devour you not 20 minutes prior. His chest was heaving and lips parted as he gazed at you for a moment.

"I'm seeing that gorgeous face when you cum, no way I'm missing that." He stifled a laugh as he lined himself up with your entrance again after wrapping your legs around his torso.

'They run around beneath our feet, we roll around beneath these sheets'

Sliding in once more you rattled your wrists against the silk tie restraints as you cocked your head back in pleasure. You let out a high pitch moan, almost exasperated in tone, your back arching up into him before slumping back on the bed in defeat. Yoongi almost reading your mind whilst still thrusting inside of you began to untie the ties that bound your wrists. You thanked heaven for your saving grace. You could run your hands through his hair now, feel his sweaty skin beneath your fingertips. And soon after your hands were free he laced them in his own. This also being new to you. You knew the drill when having sex with him. He laid down the ground rules early on. No kissing. No cuddling. No hand holding. So what he did next really sent you through a loop.

"Fuck I'm close." He sighed before leaning down to kiss you.

His lips were salty, battered and bruised much like your own but you didn't care, you kissed back with all your might as he continued to thrust away inside you. Feeling his cock hit that sweet spot again you mewled, breaking the kiss with your head thrown back.

"Here kitten?" He asked, smirk evident in his voice.

You whimpered with a nod as he continued to thrust in the right place, hitting your spot so deliciously you couldn't help cry out when his pace turned rampant and he held your hips in his bone crushing hands, sure to bruise tomorrow. The punishing pace was set as his hips bucked into you and you tried to grab at anything you could, finding no sturdy comfort in the crisp white hotel sheets beneath you. Your breathing was erratic, you hadn't realised you'd been sweating until now, although not as much as the man above you. You watched in distracted awe at the sweat running down his broad chest, along his stomach and down to where his cock was pummelling into you.

You could feel it again, serious this time. Your orgasm creeping up on you faster than any bullet. Your legs tingled and your toes curled. Your knees felt like they would break and your arms felt detached from the rest of your body. In the last moments you saw him gazing down at you, exasperated, fucked out beyond belief. But smiling. You reached up at the nape of his neck and pulled him down to you, pressing your lips against his as you succumbed to the pleasure that wreaked havoc throughout your body. A heart wrenching shout came from your lips. In every moment, a glitch of your body as it spasmed with unruly disregard and poor timing. Your pussy clenched repeatedly on his cock while he continued to thrust inside of you.

"Oh fuuuck, I'm coming." He groaned into your neck as he used hard, purposeful thrusts as he came in the condom.

'He's coming down, coming down'

The sweat that accumulated on both your bodies cemented you together for moments after. All pretence and notions suspended as you both caught your breath back. Heaving. Breathing one another in. Soon Yoongi peeled himself off of you and went to remove the condom. You lay there, staring up at the ceiling. Stars still there. You weren't imagining it in the end. Scraping your hair from off your face as you wiped the sweat from your brow. Soon he returned, bouncing onto the bed next to you, looking up at you in adoration almost. A nervous smile present on his lips as if he didn't just drag you to the 7th layer of hell with him. Or was it heaven? You could never be sure.

You looked over at him with heavy lids, inquisitive look on your face as he swept hair from your shoulder. Looking down at you with that same smile. Before -

"You fancy going on a date, some time?"

NOW Mr Min is usually not my main man but i can't help it, just, shit okay Min Yoongi.

I realise I'm probably going to hell for this but we joon

Hope you guys enjoyed, working on the next installment as we speak 🤪 if you want to be added to a taglist let me know 🥴

Love Always

Mac 🧡💜

#BADLANDS x BTS #smut series #myg x reader #non idol au #min yoongi smut #this is intense #i can only apologise #bts #bangtan #bts smut

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