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unholly-reader · 7 months

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Darling - Hamish Duke x fem!reader

Just a little something for us all Hamish lovers <3

Please, keep in mind - English is NOT my first language, so I apologize in advance for any errors.

Enjoy

Warnings: a little emotional, fluff

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- Vera, are you really that blind? They will remember sooner or later. The hides are incredibly powerful and sensible to magic, might I add. They will not succumb to your wishes. You have to find a different way to convince them to the ideals of the Order.

The Grand Magus turned away from her sister, huffing out clearly annoyed with the reprimand.

- I assure you, Aria, your little wolf friends will not pose a threat to us once we induct them into the Order. But first we need to control them.

- Good God, Vera. These are werewolves, not puppies. You will make an enemy out of them much quicker than you may befriend them. Maybe Jack Morton will be more amicable considering his feelings for miss Drake, however I can’t say the same thing for the rest of them. Lilith won’t forget it. Randall won’t forget it. Hamish won’t…

- Oh please, this again? He doesn’t remember you. He won’t remember you. He will never be back the way you want him to. Deal with it, you big baby.

- Enough!

Aria shouted out like an enraged animal sending waves of wind around her settling between the books and furniture fit inside the reliquary. Although Vera never feared her sister’s magic, as the time went by, she started seeing her true power. As much as it didn’t bother her she began worrying if she had overlooked her too much.

- You don’t get to take him away from me and then rub it in my face, Vera. I don’t care you’re Grand Magus. I don’t care you have the power to destroy me or dispose of me or even kill me. I have loved him for years and there’s no way in Hell I’ll ever stop. Even if he doesn’t remember me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to prepare for tonight. In case you forgot, we are celebrating your new Acolytes.

Before Vera could mutter a single word, Aria left the reliquary, heading to the one place she knew she could calm down before the upcoming event of the night. It was as if her feet dragged her to the Den by themselves as she felt no control over her body. One lonely tear slid down her cheek as the house showed up in the distance and all the memories, she made there came running down like an avalanche. Pushing all her emotions aside she stepped confidently inside the Den, heading straight for the stairs and eventually to his room. It still looked as neat as it always has. Bed perfectly made but still wrinkled from the last time she slept there. All his clothes hanging in the closet, his vest and shirts and sweaters. His smell lingering in the room as if he never left. But then again, she knew he would never come back there.

And just as she did it countless times before, she slowly reached for the one cashmere sweater he always loved and she slid it over her head, feeling his scent fill her nostrils. She couldn’t cry anymore as she has already cried many nights hugging his clothes and sleeping in his bed, where they used to sleep together before. Her dark brown hair splayed on his gray pillows as she laid on her back, hugging her arms gently feeling the fabric of his sweater.

She didn’t feel the time passing by until one moment she heard some noises coming from downstairs. Normally she would have been alarmed by those sounds but she knew perfectly well nobody came down to the Den and so she had no reason to fear uninvited guests, so she didn’t even move, snuggling even more into his pillow. She chose to ignore the silent steps coming up the stairs same way she ignored the slight crack in the door when it swung open. Only then did she sit up on the king-sized bed and looking at the entrance her heart stopped.

- Hamish? What are you.. I mean, who are you and how did you find this place? You shouldn’t be here…

- Aria, I remember.

His voice. Soft as ever, calming as a rainy day in the middle of summer. He stood in the doorway dressed in his somewhat usual attire – the pale blue shirt and a vest fitting him so damn well she almost forgot how to breathe. As soon as she heard his words, she slid off the bed, keeping her arms crossed over her chest as she absentmindedly hugged her form still clad in his sweater.

- You remember…?

She could barely speak as her she couldn’t believe her eyes. She stood still frozen in place as Hamish quickly approached her, stretching his arms towards her.

- Come here, you.

As her last doubt finally fell, immediately she threw herself onto him, wrapping her arms around his neck. Hamish instinctively hugged her back, hiding his face in her shoulder. Holding her close like he used to so many times before finally felt he was himself again. He breathed in her intoxicating scent as memories flooded his mind. Their first date. The first time he kissed her sweet lips. The first night they spent together wrapped in each other’s arms. Aria was barely registering what was happening around because all her focus was on Hamish and his arms holding her so tightly. She let all her anger and rage and overwhelming sadness out, crying inro his chest like a little baby. She clawed at his arms desperately trying to reassure herself, that it was not a dream.

- I missed you so, so much, Hamish. Every day was like a reoccurring nightmare watching you live your life without me in it. I could barely stand it.

- Shh, I’m here now, darling. I’m here, everything is alright now – he kept whispering sweet nothings into her ear, holding her trembling body close to him. Slowly he cupped her cheek with his right hand, forcing her to look at him. She was crying her eyes out, mascara slowly dripping down the corner of her lashes, but to him she was still the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid his eyes upon.

- Don’t you ever forget me again, Hamish Duke. Don’t you even dare.

- Believe it or not, even when I was supposed to forget you, I remembered. I kept hearing your voice in my dreams, your laughter, seeing you face every night I went to sleep. Missing my darling Aria.

#hamish duke #the order #the order x reader #hamish duke x reader #imagine #one shot #drabble #fluff #Hamish x reader #knights of saint christopher #the hermetic order of the blue rose #fanfiction

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clean-bands-dirty-stories · 2 years

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New Chapter ~ H.D.

A/n: Finally getting more requests out!! Six left :)

Request: “Hamish falling for the reader (male, if thats okay?) who has just been chosen by one of the pelts, and being terrified of losing him because of what happened with Cassie?? Maybe Randall pushes him into confessing by threatening to ask him out himself? (I love a chaotic good wingman )” by anon

MASTERLIST

It had been a long time coming.

Hamish knew what was going on with him. He knew what that feeling in his chest was when he looked at Y/n. He knew why his fingers twitched when Y/n had a hair out of place, or something smeared on his face. He knew why he tended to lean into Y/n, like he was magnetic, and why he protected him more than anyone else. Why he listened to Y/n talk about things that Hamish otherwise found incredibly dull and a waste of time. Why he let Y/n invade his space and do things he’d murder any of the others for doing - like making drinks with his special cups. He knew what it meant when Y/n stole a random shirt and it happened to be Hamish’s and when he wore it around, it made the poor TA unable to move or breathe or think.

If any of that wasn’t obvious enough, he gave himself away with his thoughts. The ones that took him through a day distracted because he was thinking about what Y/n was wearing, or his smile or voice or laugh or touch. The ones that excitedly counted down the seconds until Hamish could see him again. The ones that had him waking up gasping from dreams he did not want to think about... the ones that followed him in the daytime too, dreaming even with his eyes open and smiling to himself at the fantasies his stupid little mind came up and tortured him with.

Hamish knew he was in love with Y/n.

That wasn’t the problem.

Y/n was another TA, and worked for one of the math teachers - physics. They had initially bonded over people thinking their subject boring and hard and ridiculous and unnecessary. The men had exchanged so many jokes about it they’d started to wonder if the other would be able to understand their subject. So they’d done lesson plans together, and then... kept doing that, because it was a lot easier and more pleasant to do it with someone else.

Now they were friends...

But Hamish wasn’t human. Not really. He was a Knight, a wolf. He was caught in a war of magic and moral greyness. One that held either death or misery for everyone who was apart of it. He couldn’t have a relationship in this world - he had tried once, and it had failed. Now more than ever, he was surrounded with failing relationships that reminded even more that it just wouldn’t work.

And even if it did, how could he ever subject Y/n to this world? He was already stressed, even if he did talk about having adventures and becoming a hero. Even if he did like fantasy books and studied mythology lore. Even if he dreamed of more... he didn’t actually understand what he was asking for. While Y/n was busy dreaming of magic, Hamish wished he could join him. Wished he didn’t know. That he had never even looked at or touched or smelled any of it.

And yet, he’s in love with him.

So really it was inevitable.

In one way or another, Hamish expected Y/n to learn what was going on. Learn about the secrets Hamish had been hiding from him. If not the shifty behavior, perhaps the actual magical battle that happened on the porch of the den, or the fear eating demon that went around, or the wolves who had lost their memories freaking out when they heard magic, or the hundreds and hundreds of memory altering spells that began rolling in as magic got closer and closer to being exposed.

He had accounted for everything.

Except for this.

Because how could it go any other way. Right?

Hamish tried to calm his breathing. Tried to clear his mind. Tried to steady his heartbeat. He hadn’t known what to expect when today had gone oh so wrong. Alyssa’s funeral had been today, and Lilith was still trying to get back into hell as they tried to figure out what exactly to do about the whole situation. And... then there was Y/n.

He had come to the funeral mostly to support Hamish. Y/n had only met her once, and it had been brief. She was in his class and had missed a day a while back when she caught the flu. Of course, it had actually been because she was losing sleep trying to come up with a memory dust that would actually wipe the wolves’ minds so they wouldn’t be killed - but details, details right?

The point was, Y/n shouldn’t have even been there. Maybe at the funeral, but not after. Not when the wolves and magicians all gathered around the trunk a way aways from the crowd that had been dispersing. Everyone was going home, and even if they did look over they’d see a bunch of people who had been close to Alyssa gathered together over a trunk. Hamish wondered, looking back, if that was what Y/n had seen. Maybe a trunk of Alyssa’s things, being discussed over.

Whatever he saw, it worried him enough to approach. None of them noticed - they were too distracted by the way the trunk bucked, jerking as if something inside was trying to get out.

They all knew what that meant.

Unfortunately, that made no damn sense. Everyone currently in the group was already wolfed up, except Vera whose face was twisted with horror as she feared that she was about to be chosen by not just any wolf pelt, but Alpha.

It wasn’t Vera.

The chest fell onto its side, stilling for a second.

“Is everything okay over here, guys?”

Hamish watched his life turn into a horror movie in slow motion. Of all the terrible things he’d faced, watching in bullet time as the trunk exploded open and the pelt launched out from inside, swallowing a wide eyed Y/n whole - that was the worst thing Hamish had ever seen or experienced. Nothing could top this.

Thankfully most of the people were gone and Jack acted quickly, rushing Y/n into the woods and even further away from anyone who might see anything. Y/n didn’t seem to be on the attack for anyone specific, but when any of the other wolves went to stop him, Y/n would growl and his teeth would bare and they all felt a pull to obey. To kneel. To listen.

Not even Hamish had seen anyone take to Alpha so well as Y/n.

The next few days had been hectic. Catching Y/n up on the reality of life had been a lot, and with the new emotions of Alpha driving him, his usual placid nature was becoming aggravated. The more they tried to teach or place Y/n in a situation he felt out of control in, the more agitated he seem to become, reactions arranging anywhere from verbally retaliating to literally trying to bite someone’s head off.

The turn for the better had kicked off when Lilith had tried to claw her way back to Hell yet again an Y/n had been able to stop her. She may be a demon, but she had been a wolf first, and as Timber still lived on inside of her, he answered to Alpha before anything else.

It was what seemed to have pushed Alpha to find a host. Timber was trapped in Lilith until she died and if she was a demon, it meant she’d be nearly if not completely immortal. Which meant Timber would be lost forever. The wolves may not totally care about their hosts but they did care about each other - first and foremost.

A weird relationship formed between Y/n and all the other wolves because of this.

Not only did Lilith, a demon, listen to him despite all her best efforts, so did Randall. Even with his dumbest ideas and impulses were satiated by a strong word or look from Y/n. Jack’s craziest plans were paused, and with some pressure they all finally slowed down - which meant they made better plans, but no one was happy about it. Gabrielle tried to flirt to get out from under Y/n’s gaze, which seemed to sear deeply into all of their souls, but even she found her eyes averting when Y/n pressed issues and shut her attitude down, or stopped her when she was lashing out or treating someone badly.

Hamish was weak to Y/n, but the other wolves knew that wasn’t because of Alpha.

The real tragedy was that Y/n wasn’t doing it on purpose. He tried so hard all the time to not to, in fact, and cringed every time he shut down Jack or Randall, or silenced Gabrielle or brought Lilith to a stand still. He recoiled physically when Hamish would stop dead in the middle of a sentence, or how he backed down far too quickly from his team leader role the second Y/n was in the room.

He really couldn’t help it though. Not only because Alpha didn’t hesitate a second to flex his authority over everyone else in the group, but because Y/n was a very assertive person. Never in an overbearing way, but more in a mom friend way. When he spoke, people listened. When his students goofed around or did something stupid all he needed to do was shoot them a look and they’d usually calm down. It wasn’t new that Y/n walked into a room and held authority - it was a problem that he hadn’t earned the authority he had with the Knights. It’s was even by choice - Alpha’s wolf magic or whatever the fuck was forcing the other wolves to listen to Y/n, and it made him the most uncomfortable - even more uncomfortable than Gabby and Lilith who constantly bit that this was incredibly sexist.

The second turn for the better came full circle when Y/n seemed to get his impulses under control.

At first he avoided speaking or eye contact, still radiating that aura of power but containing it as best he could. This is when Hamish would take over again, working with Vera to help the rest of the group.

After that, it was that he could speak, or make eye contact, but not at the same time without triggering some Alpha power. Very quickly he learned how to do both and still not inflict his will on other people.

Then Y/n became a much better leader, making suggestions and letting his own charisma and good ideas influence others rather than influencing everyone via force. He earned his spot the right way, eventually reaching a place where he and Hamish were sort of co-leaders.

Y/n was struggling though. Even with his powers slowly getting under control, Y/n constantly beat himself up and felt horribly guilty when Lilith would freak out and Y/n was forced to use his abilities to stop her from escaping. Then kept her in a demon circle in the basement, trapped for now but ready to escape at any second.

Even with powers aside, Y/n was struggling with this new world he now had to face. He was curious, and asked lots of questions and generally seemed to enjoy it, but... that joy seemed to drain a little, more and more as bad things started to happen. Y/n had thought magic was cool until someone used it for evil, or until the ringing made him shift and kill people, or some seriously fucked up shit started to bubble up.

He struggled to wrap his head around it as they all did in the beginning, and as he battled with his dreams coming true versus realizing those dreams had only been half of the story and that there was actually a darkness to this life he had once wanted, Hamish suffered more and more. His relationships had been hopeless before, but now that was gone. Now it was so much worse, because not only was Y/n’s suffering greater and his view of the world darkened, but Hamish desperately yearned for him.

That was the thing about Y/n. He might have lost some of his vigor, but at his core he still believed that people were more inclined to be good than evil. That those who made bad decisions were just lost, and usually searching for something else entirely but had been convinced that their current way was the only way to get what they really wanted. The vampire wasn’t a sadistic killer, they just needed to eat. The Order wasn’t cruel and power hungry, they were hiding who they really were in a world they feared would reject and attack them. They felt out of control and ultimately scared - being brought to your knees wasn’t for everyone.

His compassion and mercy only made him so much more amazing in Hamish’s eyes. Y/n was a great leader, and even better when he worked closely at Hamish’s side. Randall began to joke that the two men were the Den Mother and Father, which didn’t help Hamish’s poor heart.

As things heated up and the pack got closer and closer, Randall cornered Hamish. “Okay all chaos and shit hitting the fan aside, what is wrong with you?”

Hamish blinked, looking down at the shorter man. “I’m... not sure what you mean.” He knew exactly what Randall meant. Since even before Y/n had been a wolf, Randall had been pushing Hamish to act on his feelings. This pushing had turned to shoving since Y/n had bonded with Alpha, and then escalated into full body tackling when things had regulated and turned into what it was now.

Randall rolled his eyes. “You two are perfect for each other. Why work you do anything?”

“Why won’t he?” Hamish snapped. “Why is it up to me?”

Randall immediately knew that they were getting somewhere. “He tries! He doesn’t flirt or anything, but if he even tries to joke with you, or do anything that normal friends do - if it’s not leading the pack together or doing something school related you shut down. You keep your distance like he’s trying to kill you or something.”

Hamish didn’t have anything to say to that. He just shrugged. When Randall rose an eyebrow, Hamish sighed. “Everything’s really complicated right now. Lilith is finally acting like her old self, and warming up to Y/n. I’m trying to not make it any more complicated than it is.”

Randall scoffed. “It’s always complicated, Hamish. Jack and Alyssa are the best of example that there’s no good time to do this kind of thing, and that sometimes it fails even when you try everything. I mean, look at Nicole and Lilith even, or-“ he cut off for a second, holding something back.

Hamish’s lips twitched just a little. “You and Jack?”

Suddenly Randall looked less confident. It had been a long time coming between them. After Jack had gotten his memories back, his relationship with Alyssa hadn’t been the same. It quickly seemed like he was growing more and more platonic with her, and stopped chasing her altogether. When she died, he had been heartbroken - not for his lost love, but for his lost friend. He had cared about her very differently to the day they’d met and the relationship they’d had after that. Along with that, Jack and Randall had been getting closer and closer, and Hamish was pretty sure there was something going on there.

Hamish was also sure that was why Randall wanted Y/n and Hamish to get together. Not just because he wanted to see the people he cared about happy, but because if they worked out, it meant some hope for Jack and Randall too.

It had been unfair to point out though, and they both knew it. “Feelings are hard and people are complicated, and this weird dynamic between the Order and the Knights isn’t going to get much easier - at least not in our time line. Even if we work together better eventually, there’s still too much history. Even more so with demons in the mix, and these rogue magic users trying to end the world with their pride.” He rolled his eyes, ever trying to ease tension with soft teasing and a joke or two. “It’s never going to be the right time. The right time doesn’t exist - even for normal people. Life is complicated and hard and against everyone.”

Shrugging again, Hamish brushed off the rather good argument. “It’s hard for normal people. And it’s even worse for us. More complicated, and more dangerous, and way more pointless. Don’t we have enough to worry about?”

“Don’t we have enough suffering?” Randall argued. “Haven’t we lost enough? Told ourselves no? Fought our feelings and forgiven people we didn’t want to? Why can’t you let yourself be happy? Adding more suffering into your plate by refusing to allow yourself this is just another goddamn thing that life gets over you. You’re miserable!”

A scoff shot from Hamish. They were both getting agitated, voices rising just a little as they got heated. “Haven’t we lost enough?” Hamish mocked. Not that it had been a dumb question, but that Randall had said the exact reason Hamish was so hesitant to do anything about his feelings and still couldn’t wrap his mind around it. Couldn’t see the simple truth staring him directly in the face.

Before, Randall genuinely hadn’t understood what the big hold up was. As he looked at Hamish now though, it clicked. He softened. “This is about Cassie.”

Cassie.

Did Randall have to say her name? In this conversation that hit hard and cut deep, couldn’t they spare the TA and not force him to relive everything in blinding vibrance? As if the situation itself wasn’t enough. Randall sighed, frowning.

“Every once in a while, I forget.” Randall’s voice was soft. Hamish looked up at him; Randall looked back steadily. “You play cup pong to solve problems and rant about shit so nerdy I can’t even begin to wrap my brain around it. You mix drinks and have all these traditions. You seem... so unphased, by everything. Older too. You’re only a year or so older than me, but you’re just constantly oriented.” He smiled fondly, chuckling. “I always admired your ability to keep it together. To have an open mind and keep going, even when you’re so tired and done and sometimes I think you’re finally going to stop. Give up in some small way or another. And then you don’t.”

For a moment, Hamish can’t look at Randall anymore. He shakes his head. “What’s you’re point?”

“Goddamnit,” Randall sighs. “I can’t imagine what it was like to lose her. You changed so much after that... but you shouldn’t stop yourself from being happy every again.” A pause. “But hell, if you really are decided to lose him, don’t let me stop you. In fact, please give me the sign that it’s cool to make a move. The man is...” Randall tilted his head, smirking, looking off I RK the distance a bit, like he was admiring a memory instead of anything around him. “If you don’t ask him out, I’ll be happy to do it instead.”

Hamish rolled his eyes. They both knew Randall was full of shit. No matter how attractive he found Y/n, his heart was set on someone else. That didn’t stop Hamish from finding himself suddenly very willing to talk to Y/n about his feelings. The real fear had always been losing Y/n, and now a different kind of loss occurred to him.

In all his agony, Hamish had never considered losing Y/n to someone else. Not death or magic or depression or the pressure of their new life or even Alpha. Not to school or students or time or graduation or when they eventually moved onto the next thing. Hamish could lose him, right here, right now, to a pretty smile and shimmering eyes.

Just someone else.

Kicked into gear, Hamish didn’t even give Randall a response. He just shot him a glare and then huffed, turning and pulling out his phone as he began to walk toward the school. He called Y/n. “Hey are you available right now?”

“Like, right at this very second?” Y/n asked. “Um. I’m grading. But I could take a break,” Y/n added hastily. “If you needed something.” He’d been trying to leave things open ended so it was less a shit down or a command and more of a conversation. It made Hamish smile.

“Maybe not need.” Hamish knew he was stalling. That didn’t stop him from doing it though, pretending that he was considering leaving Y/n to his work even as he quickly made his way to Y/n’s form. “If you’re too busy.”

“Never too busy for you,” Y/n answered with a slight chuckle. He got a lot softer when talking to Hamish, a little lighter too. Like the sun was coming out after a cold night, or weight was being lifted off of his shoulders. Like just talking to Hamish was enough to make the burden of life a little easier to bard.

Oh boy.

Please have mercy, he silently begged, more than sure that he was about to get anything but.

“Quick, meet me at your dorm. I do need something, but if we keep it fast you can get back to it.”

Really, Y/n was almost done. He wasn’t stressed about it. He was tired from all the things he’d been keeping track of though, so he didn’t mind keeping the option to keep the hang out short in case he ran out of a social battery completely. So he didn’t tell Hamish that. “Okay, I’ll be down soon.”

Something sharp started to turn in Hamish’s stomach as he tried to not let his brain talk him out of meeting Y/n and going through with what he was about to do. The second he got to the form and saw Y/n’s smile, he thought about bolting... but then he thought about Y/n smiling at someone else. At Randall or maybe even Gabby or someone else entirely. Someone other than him. Suddenly it wasn’t hard to stay in place and approach the other TA.

They both walked toward each other, meeting in the middle. Y/n seemed a little concerned at the intense look on Hamish’s face. “You okay?” He asked gently. A part of him worried there was some horrible news once again, but he got the feeling it would have been a meeting at the Den, or a discussion for when they got together and did their grading if it had to do with the Knights of school.

“Unlikely,” Hamish joked. It fell a little flat and he shook his head, deciding to simply going for it. “Y/n, I...” he looked away, swallowing. Maybe it would have been better if Y/n ended up with someone else... and then something clicked in Hamish’s head. “Our lives are so fucking complicated. Between teaching classes and fighting the forces of evil, I feel like we can never catch a break.” Y/n chuckled and Hamish actually smiled. “But then I’m with you, and you make it all a little bit easier. It’s not complicated with you, and you help me with everything else. With anyone, for either of us, it’s going to be harder. You get what it’s like to be a TA. You know what it’s like to be a college student. What it’s like to be in on this world of magic. What it’s like to be a Knight when there’s the Order, or tourist magic users. What it’s like to be the leader of a team of idiots.” They both laughed again, but this time they were both blushing. “I was so scared to lose you. But... I am. By not acting on my feelings, by letting you pass me by. I’m losing everything - and I’d rather lose you after I’ve gotten to experience what it’s like to have you. Really have you, as mine. And me as yours. We all lose each other eventually, but maybe we can get a few years first.

Voice gone, Y/n could only stare at Hamish. His eyes were full of tears but he was smiling, his lips pressed together as he tried to hold himself together. When Hamish didn’t say anything for a while though, it was obvious that he was waiting for a response though so Y/n tried to manage it. “Are you saying that you want to try something more than what we have? Because if this is one of those ridiculously cheesy love confessions, theoretically, I would say - in this situation - that I’d maybe like to step back for a second. Maybe we could start with a date and then go from there.

Whatever fears had been holding Hamish back before disappeared and he laughed. “I would love to start with a date. Just the two of us.” He tilted his head, suddenly feeling sheepish and silly. “What did you have in mind?”

Y/n smiled. “I was about to finish my grading.” He didn’t want to go back to that nonsense now. This was so much better. “Come inside and I’ll make dinner. Maybe we could make it together, and then play a gam for watch something. Or just talk.”

Nodding, Hamish stapled closer and brushed his knuckles along Y/n’s. They both let a breath of relief out as Y/n intertwined their fingers. It seemed they had a lot to talk about after all. Hamish couldn’t wait.

“Lead the way.”

Male reader: @stuckoutsideofthebox @sortzz

#hamish Duke #the order #hamish duke x male reader #male reader #the order x reader #hamish Duke x reader #the order x male reader #hamish Duke imagine #the order imagine #the order of the hermetic blue rose #the knights of saint Christopher

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