#Best friends boyfriends accidentally the same person after a while like an extension of the other but absolutely NOT at the same time

[deathxproof-archive]

Very much obsessed with the image of just. Adult Mirror Theta & Koschei absolutely hanging off one another in practically any regenerations. If they’re apart in a room for too long they slowly gravitate toward the other like powerful little magnets. Koschei watches Theta enter and leave rooms out of habit. Theta looks for Koschei when they think they’re being especially clever or doing something partially for approval. Constantly having outside conversations about people in front of their faces because they’re constantly sharing a psychic link. Their psychic connection is so tangled up in one another’s that severing it would probably fucking hurt. Unwell. Do Not Separate Them for too long or else something will happen and it WON’T be good for anyone involved.

[coollyinterferes]

Character Interview || Repost, don't Reblog

NAME  :   Robert Edward Orville Speedwagon

NICKNAME  :  Boss, aniki, “bastard!”/"that son of a bitch!” (usually from rival gang members, so the insult varies sometimes lol), Rob (used by a few friends), derivatives of his last name −Speebs, Speeds, Speeb, Speedy, etc− but these he will only accept them from certain people, otherwise he will do his best not to cringe on the spot or will do it inwardly. Uncle Speedy and etc later on (as in once George and the rest of the children come into his life, more specifically~).

AGE  :   25 in the main verse (may vary depending on the verse)

SPECIES  :  Human/Stand user in the main/time-travel verse | Vampire in the vamp!verse | Werefox in the monster!verse

—— Personal! ♡

MORALITY  :      lawful   /   chaotic /   good   /   neutral   /   evil  /   true .

RELIGION  :   Non-practising catholic (was raised as Catholic, like most other Victorians, believes in God, but that’s pretty much about it)

SINS   :     greed   /   gluttony   /   sloth   /   lust   /   pride  /   envy   /   wrath  .

VIRTUES :     chastity   /   charity   /   diligence   /   humility   /   kindness   /  patience  / justice.

KNOWN LANGUAGES :   English is his first language. Conversational Spanish, Italian, French, Portuguese, German and some more. Some conversational Mandarin Chinese as well (this one thanks to Li −canonly known as Kenpo, his Ogre Street friend−) and bits of Irish (this one thanks to Tattoo, his other Ogre Street friend). He can read and understand some Japanese (kana and some okurigana/kanji) but can’t really speak or write it. Same case for some other languages that he can also recognize and more or less understand bits of them but can’t really speak them. As you probably guessed, he’s learned most of these through his many journeys around the world.

SECRETS  :  All of the stuff in regards to the stone mask and all the events and incidents that came out from that (it was stated that the only ones who know everything about it from start to end are Jonathan and Speedwagon, the others who might know a great deal of it would be Straizo and Master Tonpety). He also tries to keep a low profile in regards to his homosexuality whenever he’s out of the slums to save himself some trouble due to the stigma at the time and the potential legal consequences, going only for the gay codes of the time (long hair, cleanly shaven face, colorful accessories, etc) so I guess that could count? Other than that, and in the verses that it applies, his stand mayhaps?? That’s what allows him to leap through timelines in the time travel verses (it possesses other abilities and skills but, since Robert doesn’t even know about his stand’s existence yet, he hasn’t trained with it and thus he doesn’t know about any of it’s abilities, not even about the time travel oof).

—— Physical! ♡

BUILD :     scrawny   /   bony   /   slender   /   fit   /   athletic   /   curvy   /   herculean   /  pudgy  /   average   .

HEIGHT  :   5’11”, close to the 6’ mark (181 cms)

SCARS   /   BIRTHMARKS  :    The most recognizable one is the scar marring the left side of his face (going from the top of his nose to his jaw), but he has plenty more scattered all over his body, some more visible than others, some larger than others. Most of them come from fights and his general criminal lifestyle, some of them even come from some of the torture sessions he’s endured as part of that (so it isn’t surprising that they were either caused by knives, gunshots, burns, shards of glass and etc). Most of his scars are located on his chest and arms, some more on his hands/wrists and fingers (hands/wrists and fingers mainly from when he was learning to use his buzzsaw hat), though he has a few more on his legs/thighs, lower abdomen, and a couple more on his back. In the main verse (usually set in the late stages of PB), he will have a few more from the events in PB −burn scars on his hands from the fire at the Joestar mansion, one on his shoulder from the attack he received from Jack the Ripper, an ice burn across his abdomen from thawing Zeppeli’s arm, and a couple more and not so visible ones on his arms from minor injuries (cuts) he got while fighting and fending off zombies−. Most of the “PB scars” aren’t too visible thanks to Jonathan (he used his hamon to heal Speedwagon’s injuries shortly after).

ABILITIES   /   POWERS  :  He’s able to tell an evil person from a good one by their smell alone. He’s a resilient man and quite a strong one, too (stronger than the average guy, as he was shown killing zombies using his brute force only and a sledgehammer). He's good at hand to hand combat, he’s also good at using knives and guns, and at wrecking shit with a sledgehammer. I also hc that he's capable of creating veeeeeery small amounts of hamon (this as a result of Zepp's "accidental" slip) if he really puts his mind into it. Due to his current limitations with it, his hamon can’t be used for fighting, but it does enhance his healing process, making it slightly faster than that of an average human (with some proper training, chances are he might be able to do more with it, tho). His stand, in the verses where he has it, can perform time travel, which happens at random at first (he gradually gains control on his stand once he learns about it and starts training with it). Due to stands being a reflection of sorts of their user and their fighting spirit, and as an extension of Robert’s own hamon healing abilities, his stand also possesses healing abilities that can be used both on himself and on others, though this requires some training prior, as the healing relies entirely on Speedwagon’s own life force and can be fatal for him if used carelessly at first (once properly trained, it won’t represent a real danger for him to use). Much like Robert himself, his stand is also capable of packing some punches and causing serious damage on it’s opponent despite his stand being more of a “support” stand rather than a fully combat based one.

RESTRICTIONS  :  He's mostly a regular human in the main verse, so he’s at a great disadvantage against stronger supernatural beings such as vampires and pillarmen, for example. As stated above, the amounts of hamon he can currently create are small and, thus are difficult −almost impossible− to use for combat (again, this can change if he gets some proper training). His lack of knowledge on his stand’s existence can also count as a restriction for the time being, as he doesn’t know about it or it’s abilities and, thus, can’t use it at his will for now (it operates mostly in an “unconscious” level at first, usually after getting triggered). He also tends to wear his heart in his sleeve when it comes to the few people he truly holds dear and considers special to him, so that can be used against him if he’s not careful enough.

—— Likes / Scents! ♡

FOOD  :    He isn’t really picky with food since he grew up in absolute poverty and sometimes went for days without a single bite of food or eating stale (sometimes even moldy) food so like… he’s cool with pretty much anything nowadays. He’s also an adventurous man, so he’s always open to trying new and even “exotic” stuff. Other than that, pastries are one of his top fave things ever (creamy ones mainly but not exclusively).

DRINK  :   Tea −citrusy/fresh types mainly like lemongrass, same with berry teas−. He doesn’t mind sweeter teas but, since he usually has them with the pastries, he prefers something more “sour” to balance things out. He also likes coffee, liking it strong, kind of sweet, and hot (just how he likes his men lol). As for alcoholic drinks, he’s all for beer and gin. He also enjoys some of the sweeter ‘posh’ wines Jonathan normally has at his home.

PIZZA TOPPING  :  As far as I know, pizza toppings weren’t as creative and “crazy” in the 19th century as they have been over the last few decades, so he’s only used to more ‘traditional’ stuff like variants of Pizza Margherita, for example. However, in the time travel verses/modern!AUs he will definitely try all kinds of pizza toppings (yes, this includes pineapple pizza as well as entirely sweet pizza toppings and so on) and actually likes some of them.

COLOUR  :    Purple (shades like those of his waistcoats i.e.), pink, greeeeeeenvert, black.

MUSIC GENRE  :    More than a genre itself, he enjoys and appreciates music that can make him feel something. Toss some pub songs there for obvious reasons lol.

BOOK GENRE  :     General fiction mostly. He also enjoys reading some romance novels every now and then whenever he gets the chance to get his hands on a gay romance one, either featuring two males or two females (he doesn’t find the appeal in “traditional” ones for a variety of reasons).

MOVIE GENRE  :    Non-applicable in the main verse. Time travel verses −if he even gets the chance to watch a movie− and even in a modern!AU, his go to genres would probs be similar to his book genres, lol, just add some comedy there but like, not the ‘cheapest’ and cringey kind of comedy.

SEASON  :     Autumn and Winter (harsh winters are a pain in the ass in Ogre Street, but he can handle them fairly well overall)

CURSE WORD :   Fuck / Shit / Bloody and variants of it (like Bloody Hell) / Arsehole / Wanker / Damnit / Bollocks, Ballocks and all of it’s variants / Bastard / Motherfucker / Zounderkite (victorian for “idiot” but with even harsher and ruder connotations than just using “idiot” lol) / Beardsplitter (one of the victorian words for “penis” xd). There are plenty, plenty, more but those are the ones I can think of rn. He comes from the darkest pits of the slums after all, so yeah... Lots of cussing can be expected.

SCENT ( S )  :    Sweet and masculine musky scent, mainly, with an occasional subtle note of gunpowder and/or tobacco depending on whatever tf he’s been doing. Maybe a vague note of blood if he just got out of a fight. Some vague vanilla too but that one only around the time when he lands a temporary job in a bakery in London.

—— Fun Facts! ♡

BOTTOM OR TOP  :   Top leaning verse. He only bottoms occasionally for serious/long term boyfriends that he genuinely trusts, partly due to how being a bottom was (wrongly) perceived as being submissive by most people, and how dangerous being seen as such can be in a place like Ogre Street if the word gets out (not to mention that there’s been people there who have given him shit just for being gay), and partly because he also prefers to top and likes it better, lol.

SINGS IN THE SHOWER  :   Yeah. He started doing it as a child as a way to keep his mind distracted from how cold as fuck the water he’d wash himself with was (he usually bathed in rivers or washed himself with buckets of water some maid forgot outside of a household and that he managed to steal). He’s become a lot more used to cold baths over the years so a distraction is not necessary anymore, however, he still sings or hums sometimes whenever he has a song stuck in his head or if he’s particularly happy about something (this continues later on in life as well,even after cold baths are no longer part of his life, so it’s a habit that he never actually leaves).

LIKES PUNS  :    He loves them! Lame ones, good ones, cheesy ones, silly ones, witty ones, dirty/vulgar ones, etc. Heck, even dad jokes can be found in his repertoire! Chances are that, if you come to him with a pun or joke, he will give you one or two (maybe even more) in return.

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Tagged by: @le-princesse-chevalier​​ (( thank you so much for the tag!!! ♡♡ ))

Tagging: @historias-multorum @jojoingjoseph @gazelessmenagerie @usfv @featherchan @kindersturm @iiguess @storiedocs @quirofiliac @rotrioted @breatheflcra @emcraldsxchcrrics @arrhythmiiia @mechahero @voltagecrow @promiseled @joesrparchive (tagged your main but the tag applies to any and all of your muses that you might want to fill this for >:D) @rzrbite​ @mistymiddiana (if you’re up for it) & also tagging anyone and everyone who wants to give this a shot! Just take it and say i tagged you~ Multis and peeps with 2+ muses, feel free to do this for as many of your muses as you wish!

[secret-engima]

Fic title thing - heart held close to the moon and Neptune

...

...............

Neptune ... Neptune was the Roman god of the sea right? ... Just looked it up and yes he was so-

>:D

FF7

Mer

AU

But rather than EVERYONE being mer or whatever, it’s ONLY the three Soldier Firsts of canon. Sephiroth, Genesis, and Angeal who have never met any other mer, because Shinra are immoral and terrible and use propaganda to promote the idea that Mer aren’t REALLY just like humans in intelligence and emotional range and soul, they just happen to look human-ish on the top half. And because Mer are seemingly extinct (read: in hiding), they have nobly “Resurrected” the lost line of the “most exotic creatures of the sea” in Sephiroth, Genesis, and Angeal and claim to be in the process of cloning female Mers to “reintroduce the species”.

Except mer are NOT animals.

Mer are the children of Gaia’s oceans, the pulse of her waves and tides, touched by her moon on high. Mer are MAGIC and they will not be contained.

They escape, by the skin of their teeth and with many bloody scars, helped by the last of descendant of the True Mer (Aerith) who can walk on two legs for a time because of her half-human blood. They flee, out into the wild waters, just the three of them as a pod, rapidly protective of their little Pod Queen Aerith, their little sister in their eyes for all it would doom mer to extinction again. So they swim, up river and through lake and through the sea, and sometimes Aerith stops to visit the human woman who cared for her as a child and to tend the garden on two legs while the other three lounge in the little pond and sing softly together, and it’s ... nice.

Then Aerith meets Zack. Zack who is a cheerful sellsword rather than a Shinra plaything, who still respect the Old Ways as best as an ignorant human can, and Aerith adores him and so despite what they want, Sephiroth, Genesis, and Angeal refrain from dragging him below the waves and eating him for trying to court their sister. But Zack is genuine and not cruel like the other humans they’ve met, he gets along with Elmyra and dotes on Aerith and Angeal ends up taking him under his fin after Zack nearly falls in and downs in the pond because surprise this idiot CAN’T SWIM, and really that is that. They have another human in the pod.

Zack tells them all sorts of stories, of the lands they’ve never seen. Jungles and deserts and icy mountains, and in those stories one name and description comes up a lot, the other, younger sellsword Cloud Strife. A fierce little mountain girl who still swears to the Old Spirits and avoids Fairy Circles and will not set foot on a boat until she’s made a sacrifice to the lost Children of the Sea. He describes his “little buddy” so often during his tales that really, it’s no wonder Sephiroth RECOGNIZES the woman while on a solo hunt, struggling in the water, bubbles escaping her mouth and nose, arms and legs bound from where she’s been THROWN OVERBOARD by pirates stealing the ship she had booked passage on.

Sephiroth screams and the storm screams back. The pirates stand no chance and Sephiroth pays them no more mind as he dives down for Cloud, ripping the ropes apart with his claws, swims her up to the surface and realizes that the storm he just summoned is a PROBLEM. The waves are too high for him to keep the human’s head above the water and she’s already NOT BREATHING and Sephiroth can’t just- UNSUMMON a storm, but this girl is Zack’s friend and Zack is pod which makes THIS ONE pod and Sephiroth-can’t-let-her-die-.

Sephiroth holds her close and sings-sings-sings, struggling against death, screaming to the moon to spare this human, to make her SURVIVE somehow, because Sephiroth has too few people in his life and he cannot afford to lose any of them, even one he has never met before.

And Sephiroth-

Sephiroth was Hojo’s finest creation. He was grown from the blood of the most Ancient mer. The Wild Kin even Aerith’s race of mer feared for their power, their savagery, their ability to wrap up the world in their voice and SHAPE it the way they wanted. Jenova is not an alien virus in this au, oh no, Jenova was The Sea Witch. The most feared and powerful and deadly o the Wild Kin, the last to fall in their war against the much more numerous humans and Cetra mer that had banded together against the Wild Kin and their Sea Witches. Jenova was the one who cursed the Cetra and decimated their numbers, she was the one to freeze the great northern sea mid-motion like a glacier around a great crater.

Jenova is, in a morbid, cloned sense, his mother.

Sephiroth sings.

The world obeys.

The body in his arms changes.

Cloud breathes in water and does not drown.

When Cloud groggily wakes up three days later, it’s to one very frantic Zack hovering over her face, the sky above her head, and the weird sensation of being submerged from the waist down. She remembers being knocked off the ship and sits up in confusion-

Looks down and doesn’t see legs.

The glittering tail of ink black and spiraling ice blue twitches spasmodically under her stare, responding to her desperate attempts to move legs that AREN’T THERE ANYMORE.

Cloud starts screaming and all the glass and quite a bit of nearby stone shatters.

While Zack and Aerith help deal with ... THAT whole mess, Sephiroth lurks guiltily in the nearby river, not daring to enter the pond while Genesis whimsically notes that aside from the ice blue swirls, her tail exact same shade of black as his, so does that mean she’s a full blooded Wild Kin now? Genesis and Angeal aren’t, because they have bright red and bright blue scales with black highlights respectively, sign of Wild Kin blood but not nearly as pure as Sephiroth’s jet black and trademark silver hair and slitted eyes. Angeal slaps Genesis over the head and says there are bigger things to worry about, because SINCE WHEN was any kind of magic strong enough to transform a human into an ACTUAL MER and what do they do now? Sephiroth already tried turning her back, but it didn’t work, because that kind of Song that remakes the world itself can only be used on a person on that large a scale ONCE, so now they’re stuck and how will they explain any of that to Zack’s formerly-human friend.

Sephiroth continues to lurk at the bottom of the river, feeling very guilty. He didn’t mean to do that. He meant to save her, not transform her, and the entire thing tastes too much of Hojo’s lab and his unwanted experiments and talk of using Sephiroth’s blood to create clones or hybrids.

Maybe once Zack and Aerith calm her down she won’t entirely hate him?

Who is he kidding, she’ll probably try to gut him with her bare claws.

(Anyway a sort of Modern-Fantasy AU where Mako is a thing but the SOLDIER program isn’t, Mer are a thing, and Fem!Cloud and Sephiroth end up doing an enemies to lovers slowburn but more in a you-transformed-me-against-my-will-so-I-HATE-YOU to friends to lovers way.)

(Also Hojo tries to do more evil shenanigans and Shinra hopes to conquer the world, but that all gets shut down by the Pod because fun fact you can’t run a wold spanning empire if all your ships keep mysteriously getting sunk. It’s not like you can helicopter EVERYTHING over the water, especially since all air traffic gets rapidly shut down by the mysterious super storms that blow in when they try. Reeve eventually gets accidentally kidnapped by the Pod and converted to their side so he starts looking into non-Lifestream power alternatives and Rufus is on board because honestly there’s nothing like a couple of mer arguing, IN YOUR LANGUAGE on whether they should eat you for your sins to make you rethink your life choices and by extension all your evil father’s life choices.)

(Also also Vincent and Felicia are both experiments by Hojo to see if he could create human-mer hybrids. Felicia is a sea serpent and Vincent sometimes forgets that Legs Are A Thing and so just sighs tiredly on Elmyra’s floor in all his red and black octopi glory. Veld is pulled on board the “lets kill Hojo and reform Shinra” boat after he nearly gets his throat torn out by his long lost daughter only for his long lost Turk partner to tackle her and talk her down from accidental patricide.)

(For reference, Sephiroth is a black beta fish with some silver edging on his fins, Genesis is a red with black stripes lionfish, and Angeal is a long-suffering blue and black lions fish. Aerith turns into a long-finned koi, and discovers quite by accident that if you kiss your human boyfriend enough times he gains the ability to breathe underwater and transform into a mer for a few hours before changing back into a human again.)

(And because I’m on a roll, Nanaki is still a cat-lion-thing, Cait Sith has underwater capabilities, Jesse, Wedge, and Biggs are all incredibly baffled humans who aren’t sure how this is their life now, Tifa would like to know when and how her best friend became a Mer (Cloud: It’s all catfish’s fault. Sephiroth: hey.) Barret is a monstrously overprotective dad and Marlene is the world’s cutest baby mer and Sephiroth would literally destroy the world for her if she asked him too. Genesis would help him. Angeal would just sigh and hold Marlene out of the danger zone.)

[roc-thoughtblog]

Sense and Sensibility Readthrough Part 9

Chapter 12, Pages 49-54

Previously, Sir Middleton has started the Party Timez and Marianne is flirting it up with mysterious Mr. Charming. Meanwhile, Elinor has a sweet moment with Colonel Brandon where he alludes to a past love-related something, because they are both two lonely people watching a party.

I enjoyed this chapter, because Margaret finally opened her mouth and only gold came out. :D You little scamp, you have vindicated my small obsession with seeing you relevant in any form!

Readthrough below.

Chapter 12

AS ELINOR and Marianne were were walking together the next morning the latter communicated a piece of news to her sister which in spite of all that she knew before of Marianne's imprudence and want of thought, surprised her

Oh? OH? Marianne going to have many thoughts, head full of prudence?

by its extravagant testimony to both.

NOPE! Also, Austenism on first sentence of chapter, nice opening. I most creatively coined that for personal use and now I finally get to use it! Setup into unceremonious, and yet very extra, subversion that turns potential positives upside down. Anyway, Willoughby has given Marianne a horse, which she has accepted with zero thought into the Dashwoods' ability to keep it.

Elinor, has, of course, thought of all the things the family is lacking with regards to horse-keeping, including most prominently, a complete lack of a stable in which to house it. Was boutta ask, good Elinor answered my enquiry most quickly.

I have a friend who is a self-professed horse-girl, and many mutual friends who attest to not desiring to ride with her on account of it being quite dangerous. This isn't directly related to anything, Marianne just invited Elinor to ride her horse and I was suddenly struck by a memory of warring opinions on the risks of horseriding. Horse-girl's testimony to its relative safety was not aided by her own anecdote of having fallen off a horse onto her back once, and not being able to feel her neck for a while, or something similar to that effect (don't worry, she is fine). I imagine Elinor would be horrified.

Marianne brushes off all of Elinor's concerns in... most short-sighted fashion. No Marianne, do not keep a horse in any old shed. This reminds me of when my aunt kept her kittens in the bathroom. Bad. Awful. Don't consider keeping animals if you can't be bothered to house them properly. :(

Of course, Marianne draws the line when Elinor claims she doesn't know Willoughby well enough to receive a horse from the man;

"You are mistaken, Elinor," said she warmly, "in supposing I know very little of Willoughby. I have not known him long indeed, but I am much better acquainted with him, than I am with any other creature in the world, except yourself and mamma. [...] I should hold myself guilty of greater impropriety in accepting a horse from my brother, than from Willoughby. Of John I know very little, though we have lived together for years; but of Willoughby my judgement has long been formed."

Marianne has a great talent for speaking warmly. :'D

Ouch girl you have been hit hard. The infatuation, it speaks through you with a megaphone.

It's really fascinating how big an effect love and infatuation seems to have on apparent closeness. Like at some point it really does cross over the line to being genuinely close, but I feel like I observe a lot of the time, before that point, that people tend to... trick themselves into thinking they are close? Infatuation has a remarkable ability to warp the sense of emotional proximity between people, maybe even just through the firing of emotions on all cylinders.

One memorable conversation I will always return to was when a friend of mine referred to their boyfriend of a few months as their "best friend" in the most casual, natural way. A few months didn't seem like a long enough time, and when I asked them, they did suddenly realise they weren't quite there yet... I find it very interesting how love can so easily dominate social lives.

Anyway, Marianne has jumped to Big Conclusion about how well she knows Willoughby. It's a good thing he's probably a nice guy really, but this is also likely one of the ways predatory relationships can take root so uh, look after your friends I guess. Sometimes when this kinda emotion takes hold they need a second opinion to keep them grounded.

Elinor thought it wisest to touch that point no more. She knew her sister's temper. Opposition on so tender a subject would only attach her the more to her own opinion.

Yeah, Elinor has the right idea. Backfire effect is real, and it's not something you want to mess with when you really need to convince somebody of something. You definitely need to go around with a different approach... which Elinor does, nice! By appealing to Marianne's concern of potentially greatly burdening her mother, who would of course consent enthusiastically to a horse, but also be the most inconvenienced by its maintenance.

Marianne relents most sadly. :(

She tells Willoughby next she sees him that she can't take the horse, because of reasons. Willoughby is disappointed, but tells her that the horse is still hers, once the time arrives that she can keep- he named the horse Queen Mab? Horses. Always with funky names. Is that a historical figure? FAIRY FROM ROMEO AND JULIET! Please Mr. Willoughby! You are every bit the drama queen as Marianne. You are not so star crossed!

O-oh. Elinor overhears everything, and also realises now that they are in fact a couple? By the way Willoughby pronounces Marianne's first name, and the fact that he uses it at all. Oh, that she is now absolutely certain of it, and in no way surprised. Yeah that makes sense.

GASP! MARGARET SPEAKS!

Alright this whole sequence is gold, I dunno how to relate it here but it's a quick and fun read. Reading being generally fun, but quick doesn't usually come naturally to me. Also means I don't take notes.

Margaret thinks the two lovebirds will be married soon and Elinor is hilariously shutting her down for crying wolf about pictures that turned out to be of great-uncles. But this time Margaret has witnessed Willoughby beg for, and acquire, a lock of Marianne's hair, for romantically sentimental reasons I personally do not understand but have witnessed enough to accept without question. Because, y'know, children don't count as witnesses to secret emotional dalliances you don't the adults to see. And the account is specific and detailed enough that it doesn't seem like something a kid would just make up.

And then we go on a hilarious tangent about how Margaret accidentally spilled all the beans on Elinor's love life to Mrs. Jennings for not knowing any better how to respond to questions. :'D The poor girl asks Elinor for permission to say, so now Mrs. Jennings knows somebody exists. And then Marianne drags herself into it to defend Elinor's feelings, but Margaret innocently reminds her that all the speculation was her’s to begin with.

"Margaret," said Marianne with great warmth,

GREAT WARMTH! This is greatest warmth of Marianne yet, I have never seen her so upset, I'm rolling. Poor Margaret is a little out of her depth with all the adults bugging her for gossip, and the more the sisters try to contain her the more slips out. You can't expect so much from a kid. :'D

Thankfully Lady Middleton saves all the Dashwood sisters by abruptly and deliberately changing the topic to the weather, followed by sensitive Colonel Brandon. Nice save, guys! Willoughby, good man, invites Marianne to start playing piano too. Elinor is saved, but still thoroughly shook haha. Poor girl is not of a heart that can deal with this assault.

Chapter concludes with a quick two paragraphs which I guess will set up the next chapter; they organise a party to go party at an estate belonging to Colonel Brandon's brother-in-law, because, Sir Middleton has partied in that place all too much and yet never enough. Party. Sir Middleton: Party man, does whatever a party can. What exactly do landed lords actually do again?

All this arranged with open carriages and sailing, and I assume cold provisions to imply a picnic; "rather a bold undertaking, considering the time of year, and that it had rained every day for the last fortnight -" HA. Well, despite his extensive partying experience, we are given to understand that Sir M. is still a slow learner. Oh well.

... I just realised I found Margaret to be so entertaining I didn't realise the story had like... used her as a connecting factor to completely transition the theme, setting and topic of the chapter halfway through. I feel like this is important to note, as for the most part chapters in this story seem to stick to exploring one specific topic or person. This particular chapter was somewhat all-over-the-place topic-wise (Marillouby confirmed, Elinor's beau’s existence revealed) and the only unifying factor was Margaret shenanigans, which I love, but she isn't relevant to the central plot in the same way the two other pieces are. On top of that, the chapter ends on an otherwise random note that they're going to another party at a place related to Brandon; this isn't something that necessarily needed to cap off this chapter as far as I can tell.

I guess what I'm wondering is, this slightly frankenstinian chapter; is it the result of combining two smaller segments too short to be chapters in their own right, or is it more like... a deliberately transitional chapter? That the chapter lacks a unifyingly plot relevant topic to explore, because it's only concern is for setting up pieces for coming chapters at the new estate party? I guess I'll find out soon.

[glowyjellyfish]

For some reason, despite not having watched the show in roughly seven years according to when I last wrote thoughts about it, I decided last week to start listening to a podcast about Buffy the Vampire Slayer because October. The podcast turned out to be amazing, and despite being thoroughly disillusioned with Joss and worried that would change how I see the show too much, I started watching along with the podcast. Well, really I’m playing catch-up. I just started the Reptile Boy podcast episode, and I just finished The Pack in actually watching. My perception has changed, but mostly in a more mature/woke direction, I’m seeing more problematic stuff and wanting to deconstruct it, but it’s not hampering my love of the characters. I am trying to use death of the author to try to deconstruct and watsonianly explain things, but sometimes it’s better to just go “the writers fucked up” or “yup, that’s a weird and creepy Joss fetish” and let the characters off the hook and be a Doylist.

Here are the thoughts I’ve had so far, which as you can see cheerfully spanned the entire range of the show, because season one doesn’t give me personally a lot to work with.

-Xander is borderline Nice Guy in season one, and I don’t like it. I am enjoying deconstructing him and figuring him out more than I ever did before, though, despite an uneasy feeling that doylistically it started from Joss’ idea of how a average dorky teenage boy would act when surrounded by awesome girls and then reasons for it were added later. It’s really genuinely interesting that Xander’s the heart of the team and has all the feelings about everybody and wears his heart on his sleeve, crushing a lot because of that leaving him vulnerable in addition to hormones, and that growing up in an abusive and neglectful household led to insecurity and overcompensation and poor coping skills. And it’s a really fascinating idea that he despises vampires because he lost one of his best friends to them, and can’t handle the idea of any being capable of redemption or good behavior because he semi-accidentally staked Jesse while trying that concept out and if they can be redeemable then he can’t forgive himself, but of course the show didn’t want to talk about Jesse and preferred to heavily imply if not outright say that Xander’s feelings about vampires were mostly about jealousy over Buffy, which is the most Nice Guy angle they could have possibly chosen. (I... can’t say I totally mind, as Jesse’s behavior was objectively worse than s1 Xander, but still I think it would have been better to not ignore his impact on Xander.) I’m glad Xander more or less gets over his crush after season one and doesn’t wade any further into Nice Guy territory, if I recall correctly, and I’m not claiming it’s unreasonable for him to have had it in the first place, it’s just so much of his behavior regarding it is so uncomfortable, and it could have been handled loads better.

-weirdly, The Pack is the first episode of season one that I found I still thoroughly liked. I did enjoy the show deconstructing/dealing with some of the Xander problems by cranking them up to eleven, and part of it is that I am a sucker for werewolf and werewolf-like stories, and also a sucker for supernatural things happening to the Normal Harmless People in media, but I honestly think a big part of it is how little the episode uses terrible s1 special effects to play the story out. It’s all in the acting, and there was some really convincing and good acting going on.

-I discovered that the last time I watched seven years ago, I concluded that despite his general attitude, Angel genuinely likes being around fun and lighthearted people. I want to bask in that concept for a moment before I turn it around to an earlier point, and say that if Xander wasn’t constantly openly hostile to Angel, they could very well be bros, and I am bummed the show never tried. I mean, jealousy or not, Xander’s vampire issues should still be a problem. But I like the idea of Angel just silently enjoying Xander’s dumb jokes and his naivety, and logically Angel would also super appreciate Xander being adamant about killing him when he’s gone evil. In fact, even if they never became bro’s in canon, I’m going to declare it headcanon that Angel quite liked Xander as a person, and just did not take kindly to constant jabs at his nature. Although, honestly, Angel probably would be a little jealous of Xander regardless for being the most emphatically human person around, (especially considering what a disaster Angel was when he was Liam? He wouldn’t see Xander and think “what a foolish child”, he’d think “is this what I could have been if I was alive now? if I had a couple good people in my life to protect me and help me grow into a better person?”), and wouldn’t really enjoy Xander constantly reminding him that Xander is human and Angel is not. So here’s the revised headcanon: Angel likes Xander as a person, and would quietly consider him a friend if Xander wasn’t openly hostile to him. Angel does not super enjoy spending time with Xander since it means constant needling and reminders that Xander has what Angel never got, but he does appreciate that Xander never lets his guard down and by extension reminds Angel not to let his guard down, either. I will have to see if that holds up as I rewatch; I am still mired in season 1 and I haven’t gotten up to them even sharing a scene yet.

-I have been thinking a little about the escalation of Willow’s heartbrokenness over the course of the series, and… I know there’s a good topic there but it just makes me sad to think about.

-on willow: I think she’s bi and the show/joss is just bi-phobic. Watsonianly, she just never had a full education in the nuances of sexual orientation, and emphasized her gayness to reassure Tara and to embrace a label to define herself. However, while I think she’s bi, I would describe her as having more attraction to women than men, and might even argue that all her attraction to men is demisexual—Xander’s obvious, and Oz did all the pursuing and showed all the interest early on. I think Willow was excited to be desired and to achieve the milestone of not only “boyfriend” but “cool boyfriend in a band” that helped distance herself from nerdiness, and it took a little while for that to build up to attraction and love. Not super long, but long enough for her to doubt her attraction when thinking about it in hindsight.

-speaking of Oz I have so many Oz thoughts. Oz, I love you, but where did you get the idea that you need to solve all your problems yourself and not talk to anybody about it? Stoicism is cool and all but use your words, Oz. You would solve so many of your problems if you learned how to communicate! WHO TAUGHT YOU TO BEHAVE THIS WAY. I haven’t gotten up to him yet but my fandom brain’s already there, he’s my favorite and I can’t wait to try applying this perception to him in action.

-I would love to peek into the alternate universe where Oz didn’t leave. Hell, I want to know what would have happened both if everything else was basically the same but Oz was still around as a main character (say, he wanted some distance to work on control but didn’t leave town; Willow was very upset about it but perhaps not to the same degree, and still met Tara while looking for a way to train/practice magic and developed feelings for her; New Moon Rising happened similarly but Oz doesn’t leave town at the end; alternately he did leave but just for the first stretch of episodes and he stays after NMR), and also in the different scenario where because Oz isn’t leaving, Xander is picked to be The Gay One. I mean, he’d have to be bi, too, and my mind honestly boggles at the hurdles the show might have had to leap to make it plausible, but I would like to see it. What kind of boyfriend would the show have given Xander, and why am I thinking of Schitt’s Creek when I wonder what a gay romance for Xander would look like?

...but I’m reeeeally getting ahead of myself now. I did not expect to have so many of my thoughts be about a. the dudes and b. Xander, but what can you do? Soon I’ll have material to talk about, for example, how amazing Cordelia is, but for now...

(and yes, I have been pinging from one fandom to the next in order to find The Right One, and doing one or two thought-dumps before I find myself moving on to a different one without finishing the first. I do not control the hyperfixation. I might go back and forth when the newest one loses its shine, but I am really enjoying the concept of revisiting Buffy for October, and might proceed to do the same with Teen Wolf when I’m done if only for a fascinated comparison between the two and what inspired what and what was improved upon or done worse. Might. Hyperfixation, remember.)

[tasmanianstripes]

22, 23, 25, 26, 54, 63

YEEHAW BABES, COUPLES TIME. 22 was already answered though also slapping in Slaughter since they're Peter's partner

23. Who are the people your OC surrounds him/herself with?

Damien: He usually sticks to the 7 deadly sins and the ex 7 deadly sins aka the fallen angels, he especially likes the company of Boris, Lust, Satan and Lucifer. He naturally also has bodyguards and actually hired one of his childhood friends as one and they like to hang together.

Theo and Hestia: Usually hang with the same crowd, especially after joining the Elements, although Hestia is considerably more social and her brother just kind of follows her around. Hestia did prefered to hang out with Harvest (same flavour of lovable dumbass) and Night, while Theo mostly spent time with Famine and by extension War, sometimes he liked to hang with Death too. The fact that War and Theo didn't liked each other at first makes this fucking hilarious too, guess they're masochists! Anyways, the whole Hestia being social and Theo being her follower was kept constant where ever they went, be it Earth or other planet, so Hestia's buddies are Theo's buddies also.

War: Mostly hanged out with other Elements, especially his siblings and Famine, later on Theo too. He doesn't really mingle with mortals, he doesn't see the post as their entire life spans are like a blink of an eye for him. Still, he sometimes goes out and spends time by himself or woos the ladies just for fun, it's just that spending time with the same 13 people for billions of years can get very repetitive, ya feel?

Blitz: He's not very social so his friend circle is very small, consist of his and Am's closest friends. He does end up hanging out with Am's work friends, and unfortunately for him his wife's coworkers are VERY interested in him, lmao.

Peter: He's very asocial, the only people he spends time with is his brother and roommate Sam, Sam's gf and friend when they come over (he doesn't like them that much anyways), later on gets a temporary boyfriend Cliff so he hangs with him. Ends up mostly spending time with Isagani, Tabitha, Masquerade and Havoc, mostly because he got tangled up on all that monster shit by Slaughter, but he does end up geniously being friends with Isa and Tabitha. Oh and I guess Slaughter counts too, but they do share a body.

Slaughter: They are not very popular among other monsters, unless you count being a popular target to mock and bully, as such they only really hang out with Havoc and Masquarade. When they posses Peter they eventually come to like him a lot. Kind of hangs around Isagani and Tabitha, they're important to Havoc and Peter so they don't mind them, they do kind of like them they just wouldn't call them friends, ya know? Now, as for Sam, his gf and his friend, they REALLY don't like them, especially Samuel, but tolerate them for the sake of Peter.

25. If your OC has a soulmate, who is it?

Damien: I uh... I kind of ship him with Lucifer and Satan LMAO, although he probably gets along with Lucifer better, at least at first. But I feel his true soulmate would be Boris, not romantically though. They're just two halves of the same clown.

Hestia: Doesn't have a romantic soulmate, but a platonic one... I'm just sayin, once again, Harvest and her are the same flavour of lovable dumbass.

Theo and War: The bastards are obviously each other's soulmates, though they denied it for soooo fucking long. There's actually a cool little thing in their universe, that if the two elements manage to combine their attacks (like powers) and make a new one, they're truly meant for each other. They accidentally made dark fire together while fighting side by side and Hestia would not let them live that down :')

Blitz: His wife 💕 he loves his wife so much

Peter and Slaughter: They seem to be made for each other, which is hilarious because at first I didn't even intended for them to be friends lmao, Peter was just Slaughter's pkaytoy, but their personalities just fit together so well

26. Why does your OC and his/her soulmate work so well together?

Damien: He's just a lovable bastard honestly. Him and Lucifer are really fucking soft and made great friends before even starting to date, meantime Satan is...more complicated situation, but he still works with Damien, they just need some time. Overall I think they work because both fallen angels are very nurturing and sweet and DAMIEN NEEDS THAT SHIT.

Theo and War: They're two chaotic fucking bastards that just work well together! Even when they couldn't stand each other they couldn't be kept away from each other, they both are that stubborn bastard type hence they clashed at first. They share a lot of common interests and love talking to each other. They're just a firey couple :')

Blitz: Opposites attract, as they say! Blitz is the literal opposite of his wife, yet they both love each other very deeply and live spending time together, although they do not share that many interests they do like to get invested in their spouse's interest, like Blitz listening to his wife talk about horse breeds, or her watching him paint and trying along with him even though she sucks at it. They're just lovely together.

Peter and Slaughter: The opposite of the previous case, although at first glance their situations seem different they really aren't that far from each other, they bond over their similar experiences and feelings, and help one another.

54. Does your OC think with his/her head or heart?

Damien: Heart. Unfortunately emotions always get the best of him.

Hestia: Heart, she's the dreamy idealistic type!

Theo: Head, although it's sometimes really hard he generally tries to put logic first

War: I mean... I don't want to call my boy stupid but uh....hes kind of a himbo. Not that he's a COMPLETE idiot, quite the opposite! He's brilliant in battle strategy! Unfortunately that seems to be everything that he focuses his braincells on. The second fighting isn't involved? Logic flies through the window. Brain has been locked in the trunk, heart's at the wheel and the brakes are removed. Beep beep bitches!

Blitz: He likes to think he thinks with his head first but uh... I mean this man's first sentence mere seconds after meeting his wife and interacting with her for less than 3 minutes was "I think I'm in love"

Peter: Surprisingly, it's the head! You'd think for a guy that has so many problems he'd follow his heart first, and while his feelings make it so fucking hard at times he tries to think with his head first.

Slaughted: Oh this fucker's a helpless romantic and a daydreamer, heart all the way

63. How does your OC display love?

Damien: He does not, usually. He will jokingly first with somebody then immediately panic and run away the second they show geniouse interest in him. Showing affection is really hard for him but if he does it, its usually physical, like snuggles. He's way more open with his affection towards friends though.

Hestia: She will not only tell you she loves you everyday, she will do all sort of little things to show you she appreciates you.

Theo: Mostly likes to show love through actions, would DEFINITELLY write a sappy love song.

War: One again, just like his husband he is more of an action man, although his affection is way more subtle.

Blitz: This bitch is SOFT and will fucking melt and ramble about his lovely wife SO MUCH, he constantly tells her he loves her and shows her his love through actions too, like physical affection or giving her gifts. She's also most often the subjects of his paintings 👀

Peter: He shows his affection though actions, and is subtle about it too. I mean Slaughter didn't noticed until later, but then again Slaughter is fucking oblivious.

Slaughter: Mostly prefer to show love through action but WILL tell Peter how much they love him and ramble to him about how much they love him, they're also very affectionate and cuddly

[thymeandlemons-blog]

save the last dance for me (2/4)

TJ/Cyrus [fluff, (not so) light angst, miscommunication, school dances and cheesy songs]  Chapter 1 on Tumblr / Chapter 1 on AO3

Summary: TJ tries to keep his crush on Cyrus under wraps to avoid ruining their friendship. Jonah accidentally overhearing one of TJ’s many lovesick rants makes that much easier said than done.

Read Chapter 2 on AO3

With the school dance only two weeks away, the entire student body is in preparation mode. For most, this means trying out different hairstyles, or attempting to convince their parents to not embarrass them in front of their dates on the day of the dance.

For Cyrus, and by extension TJ, this means volunteering to help with the decorations.

If you told TJ a year ago he would spend his lunch break cutting out stars and hearts from multicolored papers, he might have shoved you into a locker and called you an idiot. But that was a year ago. This is present day TJ, and present day TJ is, as his sister Amber so kindly puts it, whipped.

So here he is, sitting at a table with Cyrus and Jonah making lopsided, wonky decorations, while Andi and Buffy are on break. They’re making conversation, but it’s tense and stilted because Jonah keeps giving him these looks, and TJ has no idea why because they’re supposed to have moved on from the jersey incident.

There’s no way he could have managed to piss off one of Cyrus’ friends yet again in such a short period of time, is there?

“So, Jonah” says Cyrus, while working diligently on painting a moon that looks more like a banana, “have you asked Libby to the dance, or are you coming with us?”

Jonah makes sure to glare at TJ again before starting. “I asked Libby, but she might have a family thing. She’s going to let me know tomorrow. Might tag along with you and Andi if she can’t come.”

“And TJ” Cyrus adds with a smile.

Jonah nods, apparently needing some time to process what Cyrus said, because just a few seconds later he scrunches up his brows and looks back and forth between TJ and Cyrus. “Wait, TJ?"

“Yeah, he’s coming with us. My mom can drop us off, we figured we’d pick up TJ first-“

“You’re going to the dance with Cyrus and Andi?” asks Jonah, turning to face TJ with yet another glare.

Now that Jonah’s passive agressiveness is making the switch to outright hostility, TJ is on edge. “Yes... Is that a problem?” he asks.

“I can’t do this anymore” says Jonah, chair scraping against the hardwood floor as he stands up in dramatic fashion. “I heard you on the phone yesterday TJ.”

Jonah pauses, looking at TJ expectantly, as if those few words should be enough to explain what has been going on.

TJ quickly runs through every phone conversation he can remember having, skimming his mind for anything he might have said that could have angered Jonah.

There was the call to Mr. Beale about the shipment of new uniforms... He spoke to his mom about having dinner at Cyrus’ place, and he called Reed to see how he was holding up. Could that be the reason Jonah is upset? But he didn’t seem to mind the Reed incident when it happened in the first place, so why would it piss him off that TJ is checking in on his friend? Unless...

Oh no.

Reed had asked him how things were going with Cyrus, and TJ had kind of just... Let everything out. He talked about how his feelings hadn’t lessened in the slightest, how worried he was that Cyrus’ friends didn’t like him, how terrified he was of telling Cyrus about his feelings and having Cyrus not only reject him, but start hating him...

If Jonah heard more than a few words of that conversation, TJ is screwed. He feels like he’s watching a car crash in real time as Jonah turns to face Cyrus.

“Cyrus, TJ doesn’t want to be your friend.”

He wants to be your boyfriend, TJ can almost hear him saying. He has spent months trying to keep his feelings a secret, months spent pretending being close to Cyrus doesn’t make his heart go into overdrive, and now it’s all about to come to an end. He closes his eyes and braces himself for the worst.

“He’s in love with Andi and he’s using you to get close to her!”

Wait, what?

“What?” Cyrus and TJ exclaim in sync. “That’s not true!” continues TJ, pushing his chair away as he stands up.

“I heard you TJ!” shouts Jonah, “you said you were in love with Buffy’s best friend and talked about how she would probably try to beat you up if she ever found out. You said most of all you were worried about Cyrus finding out you’ve been pretending to be friends with him this whole time because that would definitely ruin your chances of dating Andi!”

“I-“

Crap.

Well that’s definitely one way to interpret that conversation.

What he had actually talked about was how scared he was of Cyrus finding out he has been hiding his feelings this whole time, pretending he’s straight and just wants to be his friend. He had said it would ruin their friendship, let alone any possibility of a relationship. But of course Jonah heard “Buffy’s best friend”, and assumed his crush was Andi, and now TJ’s stuck.

He can’t tell Jonah he’s wrong without confessing to his crush right in front of Cyrus, and he can’t do that right now. He just can’t.

He tried it once, when he was in 5th grade. He had a crush on his best friend Billy, and he was sure Billy felt the same way. So, gathering all of his courage, he asked Billy to go to the park with him after school, where he laid all his feelings out on the table. When Billy didn’t say a word, TJ reached out to hold his hand like they always did when they wanted to comfort each other.

Unlike all those other times, Billy pushed him away so hard that he fell off his chair.

TJ thought watching his best friend run away from him with disgust in his eyes was the worst thing to ever happen to him. That was until the next day when he walked into school to find out Billy had told everyone what happened.

The bullying got so bad that TJ was scared of going to school every day. His family ended up moving so he could switch schools, even though they really couldn’t afford to financially. They were forced to upend their entire life because TJ wanted to act on his feelings… So when he got to Jefferson, he made sure no one would dare to treat him that way again.

It’s not that he thinks Cyrus would react the way Billy did. Cyrus is the best person TJ knows. He has the biggest heart, and he has been nothing but kind to him, even when he least deserved it. They’ve never talked about it but he doesn’t think Cyrus could be homophobic. It’s just… The odds of Cyrus returning his feelings are abysmally low, and even if Cyrus doesn’t hate him, they couldn’t recover their friendship after a confession like that. He can’t risk losing Cyrus. He just can’t.

Which leaves him with one other option.

“It’s true” he says with a heavy heart, staring at the floor.

“This entire time?” asks Cyrus, voice barely more than a whisper.

TJ doesn’t trust his voice not to break, so he just nods.

“And the reason you wanted to go to the dance with us was because you wanted to spend time with Andi?”

He can’t have Cyrus know about his real feelings, but he can’t have him think their friendship is fake either. What he has with Cyrus… It’s the most important thing to him. He needs Cyrus to know that.

“Cyrus you’re one of my best friends. This isn’t just about Andi.”

He sees Jonah open his mouth from the corner of his eyes, which as he has found out today, is never good news. “TJ just come clean. It’s better to be honest now than later.”

“I am being honest! Cyrus and I have hung out a thousand times without Andi, why would I do that if this was about her?”

“To gain Cyrus’ trust!”

“That’s not-"

Cyrus interrupts them, standing up but still clutching on to the pens in his hands. “I’m going to go join Andi and Buffy on their break.” Swallowing, he continues, “TJ, I don’t think you should be here when I get back.”

“But Cyrus-“

“Please, just… Please.”

He watches Cyrus walk away, wracking his mind for any way of getting out of this that wouldn’t mean losing his friendship with Cyrus, but he comes up blank.

One by one he starts gathering his stuff. He can feel himself tear up but he can’t afford to cry at school, so he just focuses on watching his hands and wills the numbness he is so accustomed to take over. He wants to find Cyrus, wants to fight for their friendship, but the least he can do right now is respect Cyrus’ wishes.

Just as he’s about to leave the classroom, Jonah’s voice interrupts him.

“Look, dude-“

“You’re the last person I want to talk to right now so please just shut up” TJ snaps.

“I’m not the bad guy here. You’re the one who’s been using Cyrus-“ Jonah tries to cut in, but it’s all too much, and the emotions TJ has been trying to bottle up burst to the surface.

“I’m not using Cyrus, you got the conversation all wrong!” he yells, unable to keep it in now that Cyrus is out of the room. “I don’t have a crush on Andi, I have a crush on Cyrus! I’ve had a crush on Cyrus for almost a year now, and everything’s ruined because you didn’t have the guts to talk to me alone before confronting me in front of him!”

If he was any less upset, TJ might have gotten some satisfaction from the way Jonah’s expression changes as he tries to piece two and two together.

“You what?” asks Jonah, and TJ doesn’t know if the look on his face is regret, confusion, or disgust, so he looks away to avoid dealing with it.

“I like Cyrus, Jonah” he says, voice low and honest.

“TJ… I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

The worst part is one glance at Jonah’s face makes it obvious that he means it. He’s genuinely sorry, and he doesn’t seem uncomfortable with this huge secret TJ just dropped on him. It hurts because none of this was malicious, and he can’t even blame Jonah when he was just looking out for Cyrus.

“It’s too late now isn’t it?”

“Why didn’t you just tell Cyrus you liked him?” Jonah asks.

It takes a beat before TJ can answer.

“Because I’ll take him being angry with me over him hating me.”

“He wouldn’t hate you TJ” says Jonah, kind and sincere, the way he’s known to be. “You know Cyrus better than that.”

He does, he really does, but... “It would ruin our friendship either way.”

“I don’t think you’re giving him enough credit.”

If he’s being honest with himself, he can admit that he really isn’t. The rational part of his mind is telling him how good Cyrus is, how kind, and nice, and how great a friend he is. But there’s also the voice he can’t quiet telling him this is typical TJ, ruining everything good in his life. Typical TJ, who can’t get his crush’s friends to like him. Typical TJ, who ends up hurting everyone he’s close to. Typical TJ, who most definitely isn’t good enough for Cyrus Goodman.

He doesn’t say anything, or even look back at Jonah as he leaves. He goes to his locker, packs up the rest of his stuff, and heads home. He can afford to skip half a day, and today, he's going to take a shower, then go to his room and let himself wallow in self pity.

Tomorrow, though, he’s going to talk to Amber and figure out a way to fix this, no matter what it takes.

[that-curly-haired-lesbian]

Hey! Could you possibly do a queer reading into Dear John and how it could possibly be about coming out?

Dear John…I-I mean @ryanprettyboyrossI just wanted to start out by telling you that I’ve been excited about writingthis forever,but then depression sucker-punched me in the soul and put a stop to all mywriting (academic or otherwise) for literal weeks and when I finally got out ofthat there was a ton of essay to write… fuuuuun! 🙃🙃🙃

Anywayyyy, I’m out ofmy funk and just wanted to let you know that ever since you sent me this askages ago I’ve been intrigued by it.

I thank you all foryour patience during my absence and hope that this analysis was worth the wait! 😊

Dear John is one of my absolute favorite Taylor songs and in myopinion one of her most underrated, but solid works lyrics-wise.

In it I think hertalents as a poet and writer really shines through (friendlyreminder that Tay wrote the whole Speak Nowalbum by herself at 19 *cries in pride*) and for that I adore the freaking sparkleout of the song in question.

However, as I’vepreviously mentioned in asks and the like, for me it’s also always been one ofthe most interesting and complex ones to analyze. I’ve always kind of assumed Dear John is one of those songs that isnot what it seems.

My theory for a longtime has been that it’s some kind of metaphor describing queer identity andexperience and then you came along and placed this coming-out-narrative in mylap. Thank you very much, by asking me to stick to that thesis you’ve made myjob a lot easier, otherwise this analysis would’ve been all over the place withpossible theories! 😊

So let’s talk aboutthis for a sec, the majority of the fandom seem to assume it’s a song writtenabout the conveniently named John Meyer with whom Taylor was allegedly in arelationship from December 2009-February 2010. Meyer even went along with thatnarrative claiming the song “humiliated” him (x) to which Taylor responded thathe was being presumptuous in blatantly assuming the song to be about him. (x)

While therelationship did last for Taylor’s bearding-standard of 3 months a lot ofGaylors do seem convinced that Meyer was Taylor’s one (at least post-fame) non-PRboyfriend, for my personal thoughts on that please read this ask. (x)

Meyer may be namedJohn and the timeline during which the song was written may fit with thetimeline of whatever was going on between him and Taylor (PR or otherwise) but “DearJohn” as a phrase or title has a history longer than that.

Perhaps what most contemporary people think of(besides the Taylor song, provided they have any musical taste at all 😊)when hearing the phrase is the 2010 movie by the same name (it possibly cameout right around the time Tay was writing the song and we do know she likesromantic movies, so she may very well have found her inspiration there) whichin turn is based on the 2006 novel by Nicholas Sparks.

Another perhaps lessknown use of the phrase is the so called “Dear John letter.”

It refers to a wifeor girlfriend writing her husband/boyfriend a letter while he’s in themilitary, the letter is written to inform him that his partner has foundsomeone else and wants to break up/divorce, the phrase dates back to at leastWorld War II.

Wikipedia defines a “DearJohn letter” simply as “a break-up letter to an absent boyfriend or husband.”(x)

That does indeed seemto fit the bill for the song, Taylor sings to a “John” that is no longer a partof her life and informs him why the relationship had to end. (This song is to let you know why.”)

So, if the song isn’tabout John Meyer at all and we were just encouraged to think so, who or what isit really about?

Well, John is apretty common all-American name, in fact it was so common during the WWII erathat it was picked specifically to be a placeholder name when referring tobreakup letters addressed to solders (“Dear John letters.”) I think it’spossible that Taylor is using this pretty generic name as a placeholder too.

In the context of hersong “John” is the set of rules, ideas and practices (such as bearding) put inplace within the music/entertainment industry (specifically the country scene)to systematically closet performers to “save” or benefit their careers. 🤮

Long story short, Ibelieve “John” to be the heteronormativity and societal pressures to conform tosaid normativity which is keeping our singer in the closet. If you will, “John”is her own internalized homophobia which is stopping her from publicly comingout.

That being said thisis just an idea (cred to the asker, @ryanprettyboyross of course) on what thesong may be about, I personally have thought up many a theory regarding thisone in my time and everyone else is free to do so as well.

Credit for the lyricsbeing used goes to AZLyrics as usual; you all know the drill by now.

Without further ado,let’s get analyzin’

–

Long were the nights when

My days once revolved around you

Counting my footsteps

Praying the floor won’t fall through, again

–

Let’s have a look at these opening lines, Taylorclaims to have difficulty sleeping, this is because her life (or “her days” akaher every waking moment) revolves around pleasing someone who isn’t herself. 

Her days revolve around living up to the perfect image of America’s LittleHeterosexual Sweetheart™ that her team as well as her masses of adoringconservative fans built for her.

She can’t truly be herself and has to be careful whatshe does, what she says and how she acts. A feeling I’m sure many closetedpeople are more familiar with than they’d like.

She watches her every steps, every movement, everyword very carefully as to not accidentally out herself. She prays that peoplewon’t catch on and she’ll fall from her country princess throne (or through thedelicate floor of heteronormativity she has to constantly step on) and ruin herown career.

That constant fear is stressful for anyone who iscloseted, but must be so on an evendeeper level for someone who’s so public and simultaneously so deep in thecloset. A sad fate for such a young, talented artist and quite frankly it devastatesme to think about it in any greater detail. 💔

–

And my mother accused me of losing my mind

But I swore I was fine

–

Taylor must feel lonely to say the least, essentiallybeing required to refrain from being herself and hiding her truth, but one can atleast hope she has the unwavering support of her family and close friends towhom I think it’s safe to assume she’s out and has been for quite a long time. (Probably at least since high school, maybeeven earlier? My point is that she was most likely out to at least the family,if not to most of her friends long pre-fame.)

Her mother is mentioned here and my interpretation ofthe line is that Andrea is starting to see what the constant bearding andheteronormativity is doing to her daughter.

Perhaps she worries that Taylor is truly losing hersense of self and inquires whether the oldest of her children feels the PRgames have gone too far and if she wants to stop it and publicly come out? Afterall, Taylor’s parents raised her in a family free from homophobia if we’re tobelieve Taylor herself.

Taylor however reassures her mother that it’s fine;it’s all just a necessary part of the job and a small price to pay to get tolive her professional dream.

Chely Wright, a lesbian country singer who was closetedin the industry for a long time wrote the following in her book, Like Me: Confessions of a Heartland CountrySinger:

“I’d made a dealwith God early on that I’d go without love in my life, just give me music” (x)and I think that’s a pretty universal mindset among closeted musicians.

The chance to have music and performance andcreativity in one’s life is worth giving up on a happy and truthful personallife for. As long as you get to practice your art any personal sacrifices don’tmatter, or at least they’re not supposed to. Taylor promised her mother thiswas the case for her as much as anyone else.

–

You paint me a blue sky

And go back and turn it to rain

–

Here I think Taylor’s describing what this idea islike in theory, the idea of a fruitful career with hordes of adoring fans andcommercial success is all she ever dreamed of ever since she was a little girlwho repeatedly begged her parents to relocate the family to Nashville.

In practice though, it turns out Nashville is a prettyscary place for a young, gay singer, in fact the community there is viciouslyhomophobic. (x) Something that probably became apparent to Taylor pretty soon.

The perfect dream of country music stardom wasTaylor’s blue sky, but pretty soon it had been turned to rain by the systematichomophobia in the community she now found herself a part of.

–

And I lived in your chess game

But you changed the rules everyday

–

PR is a lot like chess, it’s one thoroughly thoughtout move after another, but instead of getting your opponent’s queen you moveand strategize in the hopes to please the general public with its conservativecountry fans. Not only them, but also producers, record labels and PR teams allcommitted to keeping the public image of heterosexuality, the one that sells andkeeps their artists afloat in the mainstream.

Taylor does her best to keep up with these moves andcountermoves, but it confuses her and she feels like what is expected of herchanges from day to day thus causing her to struggle with keeping up. Whatshe’s allowed to do, say and sing all changes constantly to adapt to the latestPR strategy and Taylor feels lost and helpless in the machinery that is theeconomy of homophobia, like a pawn lost on a giant chessboard.

–

Wonderin’ which version of you I might get on the phone,tonight

Well I stopped pickin’ up and this song is to let youknow why

–

Who is she talking about here then?

Well, I think this line is describing her relationshipto Team Taylor. I am assuming a kid like Taylor has had extensive mediatraining on how “not to appear gay” or whatever *puke* so if she messes up shelikely knows she’s going to get a call from her publicist.

Sometimes I’m sure that phone call wasn’t all toonice, as we’ve discussed before it seems Taylor’s publicist from her youngerdays was a very big fan of having Taylor stay in the closet, so if Taylor daredto publicly venture out of it in even the smallest of ways I’m sure she’d knowwhy that wasn’t advisable by the end of the night.

I’m not saying Taylor’s publicist was homophobic ornasty or mean, because obviously I don’t know that. I’m saying however, that I’msure she did what she thought was necessary to protect Taylor’s career andimage (aka to keep her safely closeted.)

I’m also not saying Taylor literally stopped pickingup or started ignoring her publicist, I think what the “stopped pickin’up-line” means is that perhaps she stopped listening, or at least she stoppedletting what was said get to her.

The song as she mentions was written to let “you” knowwhy it is that she stopped listening.

I don’t think“you” is the publicist, I actually think that “you” here is a more general you,as in all of the people who tried to get Taylor to understand that homophobiais just a given part of the music industry.

This is the song where Taylor says she’ll keep goingalong with their games, at least for the time being, but she’s had enough ofthe self-hatred.

As young gay people I think we’re all familiar withhow being constantly surrounded by homophobia, be it from our parents,classmates, or just society in general (or you know, a conservative musicindustry) keeps us from truly accepting ourselves.

We may very well be aware that we’re gay, but we don’thave to like it, we can wish it away and hate ourselves for feeling what we’refeeling. (Chely Wright’s Wish Me Away,anyone?)

Dear John isthe turning point for Taylor, she decides that no matter what anyone else saysand the fact that she has to stay in the closet, she can still love herself andbe okay with who she is, at least within herself. Just because she’s goingalong with the bearding and the heteronormativity doesn’t mean she has toapprove of it, she doesn’t need to hate herself just because it seems everyoneelse does. Somehow there’s strength in that heartbreak, I think.

–

Dear John, I see it all now that you’re gone.

Don’t you think I was too young

To be messed with?

–

As the chorus comes around Taylor addresses her owninternalized homophobia (who she’s apparently named John, perhaps becausesociety expects her to conform to their heteronormativity and end up with aJohn, a generic cishet boy) for the first time.

Now that her internalized homophobia/“John” is goneand she’s realized she doesn’t have hate herself she’s starting to see howfucked up it was that she ever did in the first place.

Many on thissite have discussed the fact that a pre-fame Taylor didn’t seem scared ofappearing gay, but it seems sometime after her mainstream recognition there wasa shift and she started fearing her gay side.

The heteronormative, homophobic values within theindustry truly messed with her, as she chose to word it. She went from out andproud to closeted and terrified.

She brings her age into the conversation, asking ifshe wasn’t too young to be messed with?

It seems that Taylor is as livid as me when it comesto the prospect of society teaching kids to internalize homophobia andself-hatred.

She wasn’t brought up that way (x) but she came tolearn that she was supposed to be ashamed of who she was as soon as she wastold by the people in the industry, the very people who were supposed to lookout for her that she had to sing about boys and “not act gay” if she everwanted to get on the radio or reach mainstream success.

–

The girl in the dress

Cried the whole way home, I should’ve known.–

The “girl-in-the-dress-line” is interesting to me andperhaps it is the line that resonates most with me in this entire song.

As someone who’s all too familiar with being forced toact feminine and wear dresses and being guilty of constantly policing their ownbody language as to not “act too gay” or “too un-feminine” I can say that I seemuch of myself in that person who wants to rip their pretty dress to shreds,but just ends up crying about it when no one can see instead.

Why? Well, making a public statement and refusing towear the dress would mean taking a step out from the shadow of thatinternalized self-hatred.

Admittedly though, I struggle with dysphoria which I’massuming (or rather hoping since I wouldn’t wish it on anyone) Taylor hasn’t. Despitethis I would say that being uncomfortable in dresses and “not being yourtypical princess” (to borrow a phrase from Taylor) isn’t limited to those of uswho aren’t actually girls, there are girls and women who aren’t comfortablewith being feminine or with wearing stereotypically feminine clothes (“she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts”)and I’ve previously spoken of how I suspect Taylor to be one of them. (x)

Obviously I can’t know that for sure, but I feel thatperhaps Taylor is a lot less feminine than she publicly lets on and that’swhere this dress-line comes in.

With its beer and its cowboy hats and manly men Iwould assume that in addition to being at least implicitly homophobic thecountry music scene is also fairly dependent on gender roles, meaning that forsomeone like Taylor that means dresses and boys and makeup galore.

In my analysis of NewRomantics I mentioned that attending some event with a boy she barely knewand a pretty dress must’ve felt incredibly alienating at times to a young starwho’s just started understanding the perceived necessity of bearding andheteronormativity in this industry. So alienating in fact that I wouldn’t blameher for shedding a few tears from time to time, “mascara tears in the bathroom”as well as tears on the way home in a pretty dress she didn’t want to wear.

The dress couldalso be a metaphor of course, one to describe the heteronormative role she’dbeen forced into with all the bearding and femininity. A metaphor that’s saying“the girl you made look so pretty on the outside felt so ugly and ashamed onthe inside” the girl in the pretty dress that appeared to have it all couldn’t bringherself to be truly happy. (Lucky One, anyone?)

Lastly she’s saying she should’ve known this would bethe outcome of entering the industry, she should’ve known it had been naive tothink she could continue to be her authentic self while also being mainstreamfamous.

–

Well maybe it’s me

And my blind optimism to blame

Or maybe it’s you and your sick need

To give love then take it away

–

Whose fault is it, then, that poor Taylor is somiserable?

Well, she suggests, maybe it’s her own for being sonaively optimistic and thinking that staying closeted wouldn’t feel like a bigdeal as long as she got to work with music. Or maybe it’s the industry’s faultfor adoring and praising her as long as she followed their set of rules, buttaking that love away the moment she started to break the rules, not to mentionthreatening to take the fame away entirely should she ever dare come out. It’ssick says Taylor, how two-faced these so-called “fans” and “supporters” are andI wholeheartedly agree!

–

And you’ll add my name to your long list of traitorswho don’t understand

And I’ll look back in regret how I ignored when theysaid,

“Run as fast as you can.”

–

We’ve talked about “gender traitors” before, a termthat shows up in Margaret Atwood’s TheHandmaid’s Tale from 1985 (as well as the excellent 2017 HBO series) aswell as in a bunch of feminist course lit I’m familiar with, to describe homosexualsand primarily homosexual women.

I know Taylor likes classical literature, but I can’tbe sure if she’s read that one, although I hope so since it’s brilliant!

Anyway, regardless of her reading habits I don’t thinkthe term is what Taylor’s referring to here. I think she’s simply saying theindustry will blacklist her. Put her on a list of traitors to the industry whoaren’t committed to upholding the order and the rules and doesn’t understandwhy it’s necessary to keep the environment so conservative and unaccepting.

In other words,were she to ever come out the country music community would freeze her out.This seems to be a real fear among those in the closet in Nashville and Chely Wright spoke about it at length. (x)

Someone seems to have warned Taylor not to getinvolved with the bearding and the systematic closeting. Maybe it was hermother or someone else who saw the potential dangers of internalized hatredsuch a process would create within such a young girl and thus advised Taylor torefuse to conform and run far away from that homophobic nonsense before shelost her sense of self.

Taylor of course, didn’t listen she was too busyreaching for the dream of music she’d always wanted and now that she’s olderand wiser she of course regrets letting the closeting process be the price shepaid for it all, but she was young and thought the adults who told her to goback in the closet knew what was best. Now of course, she wished she would’verun and taken steps to be an out artist from the start, instead of going usualroute of forced closeting and aggressive hetero marketing.

–

 (Chorus)

–

Dear John, I see it all now it was wrong

Don’t you think nineteen’s too young

To be played by your dark, twisted games?

When I loved you so, I should’ve known.

–

At one point in time Taylor obviously had a real andvery strong love for country music (and given the fact that she still occasionallyghost-writes a country hit or two I’d say she still does) but here she addresses“John” who now seems to be the country music industry itself and says shethinks she was too young to be dragged into the systematic homophobia thatlives rampant within that industry. She loved the music so much, she loved thepeople and the aesthetic, but the dark side of the industry in Nashville was anunfair price to pay for that love Taylor reasons. Don’t forget that Dear John was on Speak Now the album that came before Red which in turn was the first album where Taylor definitelystarted leaning more towards pop music. 

She’s said that Red wasn’t “sonically cohesive” and there seems to be a reasonfor that, Red wanted to be pop, butTaylor didn’t yet dare to fully take the leap that’d later come with 1989 and leave country behind, so Red became a mixture of Taylor’s desireto break free from country music and her very strong love for it, a toxicrelationship indeed, with the country music industry.

Nonetheless I think Dear John was Tay’s breakup song for country music, Red was the first step towards leavingthat industry behind and Dear John waswhen she first decided it was time to do so and shake off (sorry I couldn’t resist) that homophobic environment.

–

You are an expert at “Sorry”

And keeping lines blurry

Never impressed by me acing your tests

–

She laments some more about the rules and the peoplewithin the country music “machine” (as Wright refers to it) she says they’revery good at not personally being homophobic, it’s like when someone says “Ihave nothing against you gays, BUT”  the industry at large and perhaps mostlythe people within it who work close to Taylor claim that they wish things couldbe different, but that the homophobic structure in the music industry is necessaryto uphold it or whatever. They’re basically experts at making excuses for whyhomophobia is so deeply ingrained in Nashville and country communities ingeneral. They keep the lines blurry between claiming they’re keeping Taylorcloseted to protect her from the homophobia exuded by fans and parts of themusic industry and by doing it because they themselves are blatantly homophobicand scared Taylor will stop making them money if she comes out.

It’s the sortof situation where you think “Are they doing this to protect me or to protectthemselves?”    

Taylor plays her role perfectly, she has everyoneconvinced she’s as straight as they come and yet Team Taylor don’t seem happy,they have more hoops for her to jump through and more strategies with which tokeep her locked in the closet and they never seem 100% happy with Taylor’s “StraightPerformance (aka her “Acing their tests”)

–

All the girls that you’ve run dry have tired lifelesseyes

Cause you’ve burned them out

–

Then she goes on to mention other people who are inthe closet and work in country music, or in Hollywood, people (and here,specifically other women) whose closeting processes are so far along that theyhave just accepted they’ll never be able to come out and live as their trueselves. Girls who have accepted this is just their lives now.

The girls who go into lavender marriages and just dealwith it, no one being able to spot just how dead they are behind the eyes,except for a young, fellow gay who’s terrified she’ll end up like them. End uplike the women the entertainment industry  has already ran dry and ensnared in their PR gamesto the point where they see no way out, girls who are so closeted they’ll taketheir truths to their graves.

–

But I took your matches

Before fire could catch me

So don’t look now

I’m shining like fireworks

Over your sad empty town

–

It might be too late for those girls, Taylor pointsout, but not for me, not yet. By writing this song she’s taking the firsttentative step towards stopping her own closeting process. She won’t let theindustry dampen her passion for music or her will to be herself, she’s stoppedthem now, or at least she’s going to, they’re going to witness her succeed evenwhile breaking out of that tightly locked closet. She’ll shine like (colorful… 🌈🌈) fireworks over the sad reality that is homophobia and bearding.

–

(Chorus)

–

 I see it all now that you’re gone

Don’t you think I was too young

To be messed with?

The girl in the dress

Wrote you a song, you should’ve known.

–

Now that she’s decided to slowly but surely leave itbehind she can see how messed up systematic closeting is, especially when doneto someone so young and hopeful as herself.

 The girl they dressed up andfeminized, hetero-proofed™ against her will when she was still too young toknow any better wrote them all a song about how messed up they are.

They should’ve known she wasn’t like the others and wouldn’tlet herself be trapped and limited, go Taylor!! 🌈🌈🌈

–

So perhaps the way I wrotethat didn’t frame the song in so much a coming-out-narrative as an it’s-okay-to-want-to-come-out-narrativeand it’s okay to take tiny steps towards that goal while simultaneouslyflipping off everyone who want to stop you. 🌈

Hope you alllike that idea of this song. 😊

I can’t promiseanything, but I’m hopefully back now as my essay is due next Friday, whereupon Ishall have more time to hang out here and talk to you guys and do analysis regularlyagain! (Hopefully every Sunday)

I’ve really missed itas well as all of you, so if you guys have requests for songs to be analyzed inthe future or just questions for me about Kaylor, Gaylor or anything else, myaskbox is open! 😊

Next song to be analyzedaccording to my list is Fearless! 💃🌈

[giuls-here]

# 5 - What were you waiting for?

Pairing: NoMin

Length: 1,7k words

Genre: Highschool!AU

Tags: confident!Jaemin, panicked!Jeno, MarkHyuck references

Inspiration: This scene (just them holding hands, not the actual dialogs)

Collection: One Line Collection

Synopsis: Jeno is a shy highschooler being in love with the most popular kid in the whole institute, Jaemin, and having to gather up all of his courage to confess to him.

Na Jaemin, 16 years old, light brown hair, big round eyes and a smile as bright as the sun. In one word: perfect. But he wasn't just beautiful, he was also intelligent, mature, responsible and a great smooth talker. Those were just a minimum part of the words commonly used to describe the most popular boy in the whole institute. No one really knew much about him, he was a reserved guy, only sharing whatever info about him was strictly necessary, but that didn't prevent him from becoming the main topic of discussion amongst the girls at school. Actually, the air of mystery surrounding him made him look even more intriguing. Every girl had a crush on him, no exceptions, but they weren't the only ones. Staring at him with dreaming eyes was also a shy boy of his same age, too insecure to even think about making the first move and approaching his love at first sight. Many girls had already confessed to him, trying to make their dream come true, but he always rejected them, earning an "out of everyone's league" status that could make every boy envious.

When the new school year began, Jeno couldn't believe his eyes reading he would have been in his same class, that could have been his opportunity to finally talk to him, become his friend and maybe even more. Yet, he already knew that was just wishful thinking, he would have never had the courage to start a conversation, his heart almost beating out of his chest every time their eyes accidentally met. So, they never talked to each other, despite Jaemin being only one desk behind him, until one day the black-haired boy felt a soft hand being placed on his shoulder.

« Hey, sorry, can you move aside? I can't see what she's writing. » Jaemin asked with his sweet voice, making Jeno's cheek turn red in an instant.

« S-sure! I'm sorry! » he mumbled, showing off a cute smile in a failed attempt to hide his embarrassment.

Jaemin smiled back, knowing too well he was the cause of such an awkward response. « Well, you're cute so don't worry. »

Jeno immediately turned back to face the blackboard in front of him, the beating of his heart drowning out every other sound in the classroom. Did he just say he was... cute? Jaemin's words echoed in his mind for the rest of the lesson, at least until the young boy could finally tell his unbelievable story to someone who would have surely reassured him.

« Are you kidding me?! » Renjun asked drawing everyone's attention.

Jeno lightly hit his arm, silently threatening him to keep quiet while they still were at school.

« It's a shame we're not in the same class anymore. » Donghyuck continued « It would have been fun seeing you panic every time Jaemin talked to you. »

The young boy sighed, wondering why he still was friend with those two unhelpful guys.

« Anyway, that's your chance to talk to him! » the oldest one said stroking his arm.

« Don't make me laugh, he's too shy to do it! » Donghyuck replied, earning himself a look of despise.

« I'm not accepting lessons from someone who's been annoying his crush for almost two years now- » Jeno's sentence was cut short by the other boy's hand hitting his shoulder.

« Not my fault if Mark's just as stupid as you are! »

Jeno ignored his friend's defensive response, « Anyway, I'm pretty sure he didn't really mean it, so there's nothing to worry about. »

That was what the young boy wanted to believe, even though he knew someone like Jaemin would have never complimented another person by mistake. During the next days, he tried his best to ignore what happened that morning, convincing himself that he was just overreacting, but it wasn't so easy. As Jeno did his best to live his life like nothing ever happened, Jaemin's flirtatious side started to show off more and more often. The smile appearing on his face whenever he found the black-haired boy glancing at him, the sweet good morning he wished him every day, even the way he fixed his hair or made sure his uniform was perfectly on point when Jeno was around. It couldn't have been more obvious: Jaemin was trying to catch his attention in every possible way. Yet, whenever he attempted to start a conversation, ask him to have lunch together, or just wanted to have a casual chat with him, Jeno was immediately teleported into panic-zone, blushing and losing any ability to form a coherent thought. He just smiled and found any dumb excuse to escape the embarrassing situation.

Over a month had passed since Jaemin said those fateful words, not losing a single chance to flirt with Jeno, actually starting to enjoy seeing such a tough guy becoming a shy mess when he was around.

« So, are you two dating? » Donghyuck asked while eating his lunch, the cafeteria crowded enough for them to be able to speak without worrying about anyone eavesdropping.

Jeno choked on his food, coughing at the sudden question.

« I'll take it as a no... » Renjun replied patting the younger boy's back.

« Why would we? » Jeno finally asked.

The youngest boy rolled his eyes, « Are you really asking me? »

« Of course I am. Why do you think I'm dating him? »

Renjun placed his hand on Jeno's shoulder, kindly smiling at him. « Well, seeing how Jaemin's acting around you we thought something must have happened... »

« I have no idea what you're talking about. » despite his best attempts to believe it, he knew he was lying.

« That's it, I won't hear any more bullshit, I'm going! » Donghyuck said standing up and leaving the table. « I'm seeing Mark after lunch and I can't let my love wait for me. »

And with that, the group divided, the previous conversation still bothering Jeno. He knew what they were referring to, he wasn't so blind not to notice Jaemin's behavior, but he never really wanted to address the issue. He was sure that as soon as he talked about it with Jaemin, the boy would have made fun of him for coming to the wrong conclusion and he couldn't have been able to handle it. As he was thinking about him, the brown-haired boy walked into the class, perfectly beautiful as always, and sat at his desk chatting with his friends. Jeno tried to mind his own business, but being right behind him, he couldn't help but listen to their conversation. Apparently, some guy was stalking Jaemin, doing anything to impose his delusional love onto the young boy, but just when the narration was getting interesting, the teacher entered the classroom and started her boring lesson, making Jeno forget about anything he had heard.

Once he finally left the school building after an extensive chat with his math teacher about his not-too-perfect grades, he saw Jaemin talking with a guy wearing a different uniform from theirs. His expression seemed very annoyed, so unusual compared to the sweet face he was used to seeing in class. He walked towards the couple, he didn't want to appear as a stalker too, but curiosity was devouring him, so at least he made sure none of them could notice his presence.

« I already told you I'm not interested in you, so stop bothering me. » Jaemin said with a resolved tone.

Even though his words were more than clear, the other guy didn't seem too prone to listen to them.

« But you don't understand! We'd be a perfect a great couple! » he said grabbing his wrist and pulling Jaemin towards him.

The young boy tried to free himself from his tight grasp, « Dude, you're creeping me out, let me go. »

« I'm taking you to my place, we need to talk and you'll understand how perfect we are for each other. » he continued as he started walking, pulling Jaemin behind him.

At that moment, Jeno couldn't just keep witnessing the situation without doing nothing. Before Jaemin could have the time to react, the older boy stepped next to him and took his hand, intertwining their fingers. The weird guy turned around, an unexpected sight in front of his eyes.

« He already told you he's not interested, so stop bothering him. » he said in a cold voice Jaemin never heard before, but instantly loved.

« W-who the hell are you!? » the other boy asked, panic visible on his face.

Jeno didn't even have the time to come up with a good excuse, that Jaemin had already found a perfect one.

« He's my boyfriend. » he said tightening the grasp of his hand.

Jeno's heart skipped a beat as he heard it, but he tried his best not to let Jaemin's word embarrass him, trying to maintain the cool facade he put up. On the other hand, the guy standing in front of them couldn't hide the despair growing inside of him after hearing his crush was already taken. Unable to say anything, his mind having blacked out completely, he just ran away leaving the two boys alone, their hands still together. Once he was sure they wouldn't have been disturbed again, Jeno returned to his usual embarrassed self, that cute eye-smile on his face making its long-awaited appearance as he tried to move his hand away.

« It was about time. » Jaemin said not letting him go, « I was starting to believe you would have never made it. »

Jeno couldn't understand what the other boy was referring to and just gave him a questioning look.

« Well, I noticed you're a shy guy and didn't want to pressure you too much making the first move, but I was actually starting to lose my patience here. »

« I-I'm sorry, I don't think I understand what you- »

« What I mean is that I like you, Lee Jeno. »

Jaemin's eyes were locked with Jeno's, he couldn't escape, not anymore, he had to face him. He had run away for too long, letting panic take control of him, and while he still felt like his legs would have failed him at any moment, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, saying what he should have said a long time before.

« I... I like you too Jae- »

His confession was suddenly interrupted by two soft lips meeting his in the sweetest kiss of his life. It was even better than he had thought, so overwhelming everything around him seemed to stop for a second. Then, Jaemin stepped back, reassuring him with a smile and lovingly chuckling at him.

« I know. Now let's go home, I don't really feel safe walking alone. »

[i-got-the-feels]

Things I liked in Theory of Love

(I think this is the best JittiRain book adapated show - in terms in terms of plot and character arcs)

1) Third

How when he was in love- he was selfless and foolish about it. And he knew about it but still continued loving Khai anyway.

How once he got to know Khai knew and disrespected and tested his feelings for gis selfish gain- he didn't stand for it and wasn't even convinced about Khai's affection for him until Khai showed it with actions.

2) Khai

I didn't think Khai could be redeemed but good writing has ways to prove you wrong.

How he acknowledges that he was selfish and wrong and even if they were ways to protect himself that's not how you treat your friend or even people you love.

How he gave Third time and consistently tried with his actions to show that he is genuine with his feelings this time, for his feelings for him.

3) Their Friendship

How they talked stuff out. Admitted their mistakes. Asked for forgiveness. Supported each other.

Two acceptance of Third and his sexuality and that he has feelings for their friend with no hesitation. How he tells him this he will help him get through this.

Bone apologising to Third for what he did and going to Khai with his doubts instead of him and even not saying anything when Khai did the shitty thing of testing his feelings. And Third saying it will help him move on and Bone just being there and supporting him.

4) Two's figuring and realisation of his sexuality

Okays so first of all, how Two is shown to have his own interests and personality other than just being a supporting character who has his own love interest.

His passion for photography and how he is genuine about it.

How they show his affection for someone (Lynn) is seen from the photographs he takes of them because photography is an extension of who he is.

How Lynn starts to think that maybe Two can be more than a friend but then she sees that he may not feel the same anymore - again seen from the photographs he takes of her and even lets him know about it. And while doing so let's him know that it's okay and he is happy to have him as a friend.

And how they showed the source of confusion - him wondering if his feelings for Un is because he is just passionate about work like he is, or maybe its just plane appreciation of a handsome dude. The realisation and confession- how it isn't over the top dramatic and realistic but still emotional.

Also 5) special appreciation to Un- how he didn't push Two beyond his comfort zone and began by being his friend (and not doing so by lying or by comprising his principles - when he didn't like something Two- like flirt with his friend's girlfriend he called it out) nor push his feelings on to him - yes the bar is that low- it is basic human decency.

6) Bone and Paan

Again, a supporting character whose only personaity trait isn't his love interest or being a friend.

His passion for movies and editing and how he was when he met Paan. His affection for her.

Though he was heartbroken over knowing about her wedding, he still agreed to be their video editor.

And when she was vulnerable and heartbroken after knowing her boyfriend was cheating/ cheated and she leaned in for a kiss- he didn't reciprocate. How he didn't confront her fiance either and instead tried to know his intentions because he knew it wasn't his place to interfere between their issue and its something they have to work out themselves but still ensured about his intentions because he does care about her.

7) The ending scene

Being them reviewing movie together - not just because movies are huge part of their lives but also because earlier Third was shown doing it alone and even when he asked Khai multiple times he refused and appeared on screen only accidentally and now reviewing movies with Third willingly and supporting him.

[chasholidays]

Holiday prompt: "We're both in the same small claims court and I got into a huge fight with the person suing me but you stepped in to hold me back before security got there" Bellarke, please, but you can choose which of them does which role. Thank you for all your writing!

Sometimes, Clarke thinks she’s not really suited to being a foster parent.

It’s not like she’s bad at it, in most ways. She’s responsible, a good provider, and she knows that Madi is happy, which is obviously the most important thing. If nothing else, Madi is better off with her than she was before, and that’s not nothing.

But Clarke isn’t always the best role model, which is why she’s spending her morning in small claims court, scowling at everything. On the one hand, she might have–very slightly–overreacted to Katie F.’s mom at the soccer game a few weeks ago; on the other, she doesn’t think that it was really so bad that she deserves to get sued for it.

Madi thought it was hilarious, but not in a way she wanted to emulate. So at least there’s that.

She’s on her phone, texting Wells about how unfair it is while he just copy/pastes the same reply–in her defense, you nearly bit her–when Bellamy sits down next to her and says, “So, what are you in for?”

Bellamy is one of those people Clarke likes and always wants to see more of. Part of that is completely shallow; he’s probably the single most attractive guy she’s ever met in her entire life, and she’s never against more eye candy in her life. But he’s also smart and funny and if she had time these days to have crushes, she’d probably have one on him.

Instead, between work and Madi, she sees Bellamy maybe once every two months, when she drags herself out to socialize with her larger friend group.

So at least small claims court has one thing going for it.

“I might have gotten in a fight at one of Madi’s soccer games.”

Bellamy lets out an actual cackle. “Holy shit, of course you did. What happened?”

“Her kid fouled Madi and didn’t get a red card, she said Madi started it, the ref and her mom sided with her, and I might have gotten–carried away.”

“You don’t say.” He shakes his head, smiling. “She’s seriously suing you?”

“I’m still getting used to soccer mom culture. I think it was supposed to be an empty threat to show me she was serious, and I told her to go ahead, so then she had to or else she’d lose credibility in front of the other moms.”

“Yeah, that all checks out. I was wondering how you’d do with other parents.”

Bellamy teaches high school, at the school where Madi will be next year, no less, so of course he has a lot of opinions on parents. The fact that he’s always told her she seems to be doing a good job has been a comfort to her, honestly.

“It’s been mixed.”

“Clearly.”

She elbows him. “Shut up. What are you doing here?”

“Remember that sketchy guy I decided to rent my spare bedroom to?”

“The one who always smelled like weed and never seemed to be home? Don’t tell me that went wrong.”

“Yeah, we’re all shocked. He broke his lease, so I’m looking forward to finding out if he actually shows up. I’m not convinced it was even worth it to bring to court, but it’s summer vacation, what else am I doing?”

“So, you’re bored enough to go to small claims court?”

“Everyone needs a hobby.” He shifts a little, leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “So, how’s Madi doing? Aside from getting fouled in soccer.”

“Good, I think. She’s looking forward to starting high school in the fall, but I think less because she thinks it’s going to be good and more because she was ready to be done with middle school.”

“Yeah, I don’t blame her. Middle school sucks. She’s coming to Arcadia, right?”

“She is. I assume you won’t have her for a couple years.”

“Yeah, not until she’s a junior.” He clears his throat. “But I’ll look out for her, obviously.”

“Obviously. How is your summer going? I feel like I haven’t seen you in weeks.”

“You haven’t,” he says, grinning. “I get it, you’re busy. But we miss you.”

“I miss you guys too. Madi wants to have a cookout soon, so look forward to that.”

“You’re sounding sarcastic, but that sounds awesome.” He clears his throat, like he’s about to say something else, but the clerk calls, “Blake vs. Murphy,” before he can.

“Sounds like you’re up.”

“Sounds like.” He stands and stretches. “Good to see you, good luck with getting sued.”

“Good luck suing. Talk to you soon?”

“Definitely.”

She watches him go, feeling a little hopeful in spite of herself. When she decided to take Madi in, he’d had a boyfriend, and she had sort of assumed that he’d never be a romantic option. The two of them broke up, but she had Madi after that, and she didn’t see much of him. She did think they might have been flirting, and that was definitely an encouraging interaction. If she asks him out, he might say yes, and that’s something to be excited about.

A boyfriend would be nice.

Given she’s in small claims court, the good mood can’t and won’t last, but she’s not expecting it to shrivel up and die quite as quickly as it does. But that’s how the world works: one nice chance encounter with a guy she likes turns quickly into a less chance and much less nice encounter with the woman who’s suing her.

“I didn’t think you’d show up,” says Mrs. Fuller.

She has a first name, Clarke knows that. Clarke’s heard it, even–Melissa or Rebecca or something, an ordinary name that her friends shorten to Mel or Becky.

Clarke has been told to call her Mrs. Fuller, which means that Clarke will call her Mrs. Fuller until the day she dies. Which is, perhaps, another reason for her to not be a parent.

But Mrs. Fuller started it.

“Well, I wanted to make sure we resolved the issue,” says Clarke, bright. “And this was how you wanted to resolve it. I’m just trying to be accommodating.” Killing with kindness isn’t exactly her forte, but it seems worth a shot. “How’s the emotional distress?” she adds.

She’s only human.

Mrs. Fuller huffs and calls someone to complain about what a hassle the whole thing is–like it wasn’t her idea to sue Clarke for not even actually biting her in the middle of a fight she started–while Clarke googles what to do when you’re in small claims court. Which she already researched extensively, but every little bit helps.

As she expected, the mediator is less than impressed with the case. Emotional distress is one of those things that’s tricky to prove, and while Clarke was the one who escalated, she was far from the only participant. The fact that no official charges of assault were pressed also helps, and the moderator definitely tells Mrs. Fuller to let it go.

Which she doesn’t, so Clarke has to spend an additional ten minutes in front of a judge, who tells them they should maybe just avoid each other at soccer games from now on and dismisses the case.

It would be the perfect ending if, as they were walking out, Mrs. Fuller didn’t say, “Maybe if your child wasn’t such a bad seed, you wouldn’t need to be brawling.”

This, Clarke knows, is the root cause of her problems as a parent, the issue that will keep her from ever getting along with women like Mrs. Fuller. It’s not that she doesn’t fit in; she knows she does. She’s an upper-class white woman from a good family, and if these women knew her as Abby Griffin’s daughter, they’d like her. But they know her as the woman who got her orphan foster child into their school district, into their childrens’ honors courses and social circles. There’s already a strong culture of my child is the most precious and no one else’s matters as muchwith zero awareness that everyone feels that way about their children, but Madi’s position as an outsider makes her more of a target for ire.

These people think Clarke’s daughter doesn’t matter, and that is, ultimately, going to be why she’ll never stop fighting with them.

“What was that?” she asks, mostly to give Mrs. Fuller a chance to reconsider the statement.

“If your girl hadn’t been so close to Katie then maybe Katie wouldn’t have accidentally hit her. This is a common problem for less experienced players, and since it’s her first season–”

“My daughter,” says Clarke. “Madi is my daughter.”

“I didn’t think that was even finalized.”

“And?”

“And I didn’t want to get ahead of myself. I doubt she’ll last much longer.”

It devolves pretty rapidly from there. On a base logic level, Clarke knows that getting into a fistfight in a small claims court where it’s just been decided that she doesn’t have to pay for pissing this woman off is incredibly stupid, but on a much baser, instinctual level, this woman is saying bad things about her daughter, and Clarke hates her.

So it’s a really good thing Bellamy is still around to help out.

She doesn’t know it’s him at first, just a firm hand on her arm disconnected from any individual person, and she half-whirls to yell at him before she realizes what’s happening. Bellamy’s not actually looking at her, his eyes fixed on Mrs. Fuller, but he’s allied with Clarke even as he’s also holding her back.

“Hey, Mrs. Fuller, right?” he asks, and she frowns.

“Mr. Blake?”

“Nice to see you, hope Aaron and Katie are doing well. I just need to grab Clarke, sorry. We had a lunch date when we were done here.” He turns his attention to her, concern written all over his face, although she doubts anyone else would be able to tell. “You ready?”

It is, in all ways, a better choice than trying to fight this woman. “Yeah, all set.”

Bellamy shifts his hand to her lower back, guiding her out, and not to be shallow or anything, but she’s seen Mr. Fuller, and Bellamy is about fifty thousand times hotter than he is, so she’s hoping Mrs. Fuller is feeling really jealous right now.

“I didn’t know she had another kid,” Bellamy remarks, once they’re alone. “That’s something to look forward to.”

“The kid honestly isn’t that bad,” Clarke says. “Most of them aren’t. I assume they’ll grow up shitty but for now their parents are still trying to teach them to do as they say, not as they do.”

“That’s something.” He clears his throat. “I’d say sorry for stepping in there, but I figure you’re happy you didn’t get arrested for assaulting someone in a courthouse.”

“Yeah, appreciated.” She glances at him sidelong. “Did your case really take that long?”

“No, we were done pretty quickly. I was waiting for you.”

She has to smile. “You were worried I was going to start throwing punches?”

“That too. I did want to ask if you wanted to grab lunch, though.”

“Yeah?”

He huffs a laugh. “I know you’re busy, but, uh–I’ve been missing you, honestly. I was thinking we could try to see more of each other.”

“Like a lunch date?”

“For a start. Or it can just be a lunch date,” he adds. “Doesn’t have to go anywhere.”

“That seems like kind of a waste.” She sways closer into his side, and when he drops his hand from her back to his side, she takes it. “I’m kind of busy these days, but if you don’t mind a weird schedule and a kid–”

“I can live with a weird schedule and a kid. Maybe just try not to get sued during the school year,” he teases. “I can’t actually come bail you out every time.”

“One time!”

“So far. I know these parents, remember? I doubt this is going to be an isolated incident.”

It’s true, and depressing, and not what Clarke wants to be thinking about right this minute, when she’s holding hands with a cute guy she likes, on her way to a date, with the promise of more dates to come.

So she just knocks their shoulders together. “What I’m hearing is that you think I need backup.”

“Definitely.”

“And you’re volunteering.”

He grins. “It would be my pleasure, yeah.”

*

“How was court?” Madi asks when she gets home.

“Good. I didn’t have to pay any money, that was cool. And I think I got a boyfriend.”

“You found a boyfriend at small claims court?”

“It’s Bellamy, so I already knew him. He just became my boyfriend at small claims court.”

“You know you’re like the opposite of a role model, right?”

“I know. You know that too, right?”

“For sure.”

Clarke grins, leans over to kiss the top of her head. “So we’re good, right?”

Madi smiles. “Yeah, we’re awesome.”

Clarke has to agree.

[surveyhoursss]

146.

Your name is Jordan

You were born in April

You're 19

Gaming is a huge part of your life

You have more than one gaming tattoo

You have a tattoo of your animal's paw print

You drive a Lincoln

Sports cars > supercars

You love 90's cars

You're planning on getting a Subaru Impreza next

You do cosplay

You have 11 piercings

You have endometriosis

You graduated in 2015

You were named after Michael Jordan

You want to get into the Youtube world soon

You have almost 10k followers on Instagram

You went to cosmetology/beauty school

You did not pursue cosmetology as a career

You're into graphic design

You own a screenprinting business

You sell products on Etsy

You've been in a relationship for over a year

You've been mentally abused by a past relationship

You own a gaming laptop because you like mobility

Your all time favorite game is Sly Cooper

You have 50+ gaming consoles

You have 500+ video games

You joined the Harley Quinn bandwagon this year

You like to collect pink things

You don't travel a lot (wish I did more)

You live in Michigan

You're trying to gain weight

You were bullied for most of your school years for having acne

You have a pet that means a lot to you

You've been in long distance relationship

You've had your belly button pierced since you were 14

Your favorite drink is chocolate milk

Your eyes are grey (grey, green, i have no clue lol)

Your favorite movie is Pulp Fiction

You own every Tarantino film on VHS, DVD, and Blu-Ray

You've become more confident with your body lately

You used to hate Victoria's Secret but now you love it

You love to play board games

You like to host game nights with prizes

You wear extensions

You have a promise ring

You have trouble growing/strengthening your hair

You try to be organized but fail most of the time

You used to work two jobs and 7 days a week

You shop at thrift stores

You rarely ever buy clothes at full price

You've seen 15+ bands live

Your favorite was Foo Fighters

You enjoy all music

You're trying to change your style of clothes / hair

You love to sing even though you're not good at it

You get emotional easily

You're the oldest child

You didn't go to college

Your boss is your role model

You usually sleep 9 hours a day

You take a lot of naps

You have social anxiety

You have trouble speaking

You love winter

You're very generous

You don't really get the generosity from others back to you

You don't like water

Your favorite pizza is Buffalo Chicken

You weighed 95-100 lbs until you were 18 (i've been anywhere from 80-140 lbs lmao)

You recently gained about 20 lbs (refeeding ;w;)

You're 5'1

You did cosplay of a Pokemon

You like glitter

You like space buns

You complain a lot

You hit puberty in 3rd grade

You've always had iPhones

Your computer or laptop cost over $1,000

Your town has a population of around 3,000

You like horror games but are deathly afraid of them

You have a natural tan

You don't have any freckles but wish you did

You go to garage sales often

You've gotten an I.V before

You've lost part of your eyesight temporarily due to a migraine

You've had extremely bad panic attacks in the past

You get 'triggered' very easily

You have grey eyes

You hate doing laundry

You don't mind other house chores

Your S/O is over a foot taller than you.

You write poetry, mostly about the stars / space

You used to write short stories

You own every single Sims game

You've bought all the Sims 4 add ons even though you hate it lol

You used to write stories with the Sims 2

You were dedicated to a forum around the age of 9

It was a 4kids forum haha!

You used to make short films

You hate texting

You learned HTML when you were 10

You wanted to go to school for Computer Science for a long time

You used to play Call Of Duty competitively

You have a lot of online friends

You've never been on a plane

You've never been zip lining but might soon

You enjoy camping

You own a quad / 4 wheeler

You've always dated boys older than you

Your boyfriend is 6 years older than you

You love to drive long distances

You enjoy going to car shows

You're voting for Gary Johnson

You have self-harmed before

You take short showers

You love wearing dresses

You wear cat ears a lot

You like taking photo-shoots of yourself

You have A.D.D

You take Vitamin D supplements for depression

You've kissed more boys than you can count on your hands

You've never been drunk

You play Pokemon GO

You never eat popcorn at movie theaters

You still use 720p screens

Your first console was a PS1

You really want the Playstation VR

You've funded a game before

You're unsure if you will be able to have kids or not

You've had mono before

you enjoy being creative

You used to make perler sprites

You've paid for art of yourself before

You've accidentally cooked something in the microwave that didn't belong in there.

You've made friends from a video game

You used to use Piczo

You don't like modern/futurustic FPS

You don't like RPG's

You've NEVER seen the Notebook

You own a Ouija board

You took online classes in school

You failed gym class

Your favorite Pokemon is Cubone

You're an Aries

You're pro-choice

You got a dry socket after getting your wisdom teeth removed

It was the worst pain you've ever been in

You've written down every dream you could remember for the past 2 years

You're an introvert

You don't really like to be touched

Your voice is high pitched

You hate shaving

You bite your nails

You have tiny ears

Your natural hair is a few inches past shoulder length

You have huge scars on your knees

You have a deep scar by your eye

You like to read

You've read Rage by Stephen King

you like cleaning

Your favorite arcade game is Mappy

You own every color Gameboy Color

You've felt unloved before

You've been bit by a tick before

You don't understand the obsession with Funko Pops

You're into kitten play

You believe you're talented

You still live at home

You clean your car... a lot

You like to take pictures of everything

You like the name Amethyst and Jade for a girl's name

You like the name Nathan and Jayden for a boy's name

You've had pink hair

You've had lavender hair

You've had red hair

You've had blonde hair

You've had a pixie cut

Your hair is naturally curly

You never leave the house without makeup on

You love the rain but hate thunderstorms

You're afraid of being alone

You're good at math

You always do the cat eye eyeliner

You don't know how to contour

You've watched every single episode of Friends

You've watched every single episode of That 70s Show

You own a pair of the Nintendo vans

You're spoiled

You own around 50 Pulp Fiction related merch

You've seen the movie countless times

You have A.D.D

You've gone to a teacher for personal help and they didn't help

You've never had to call 911 before

You eat Honey Nut Cheerios nearly every morning

You love breakfast foods

Your parents aren't divorced although they should be

You've started a GoFundMe for an LDR before

You saw Back To The Future in theaters

You used to smoke weed but don't anymore

You've never smoked a cigarette

You would never work in fast food

You don't really like concerts but you still go

You love going to the dentist

You've had a guinea pig before

You've had a turtle before

He was named after one of the Ninja Turtles

You've had a German Shepherd before

You've never watched a Kardashian show

You never swear

You like to go on walks

You prefer Pepsi over Coke

You're really picky about food

You own a machete

You own a Halo helmet and energy sword

You don't like Bethesda as a company

The first game you ever beat was GTA III

Your favorite mini games are the ones on Pokemon Stadium 2

You only own one perfume

You buy clothes for dirt cheap and sell them to make profit

You enjoy making your bed because it's aesthetically pleasing

You've done Harley Quinn cosplay

You want to do Daenerys cosplay

You made love coupons for your boyfriend on Valentine's Day

you like to be creative with cookies/cakes/desserts

You own a pink gaming headset (Trittons)

You own Astros A40s

You've never had a Scuf controller

Your voice is very quiet

You've had the same Pikachu plushie since you were 4

One of your favorite bands is ADTR

One of your favorite bands is Volbeat

One of your favorite bands is Taking Back Sunday

You've seen all of your favorite bands live

You don't have a favorite song

You get jealous of people that are more successful than u that are younger

You sing in the shower

Music puts you to sleep fast

You're too optimistic

You've sexted someone you weren't in a relationship with before

You've gotten a girl expelled from school before

You've never been in a physical fight

You laugh a lot

You suck at making eye contact

You've been threatened for your life before

You play video games with your sibling

All your grandparents are still alive

You've met your great-great-grandfather before

You naturally have brown hair

You wear glasses

You've lost your glasses before

You have bad memory

You used to have almost 5,000 friends on Facebook.

Now you only have around 300

Your favorite restaurant is Red Lobster

You have a Lenovo computer

You only buy Samsung TV's

There were less than 70 kids in your graduating class

You check on your ex's social medias every so often

You've seen someone with a gun to their head before

You have Cards Against Humanity and ALL of its expansions

You have Exploding Kittens

You see Canada almost every day but you've never been there

You've kissed a girl before

You've been cheated on while living with that person

You've been best friends with someone since elementary school

You prefer hot foods over cold

You have an innie belly button

You prefer fruits over vegetables

You have a lot of collectibles

Your phone is pink

Your favorite game show is Family Feud

You're right handed

You have a birth mark on your butt

Your favorite month is February

You don't like Harry Potter

You like Pearl Jam

You like to dance even though you're bad at it

You're not athletic

You're not very good with saving money

You have a dual screen monitor set up

You have 5+ consoles hooked up currently

You have string lights around your bed

You don't have any posters up

You own a Japanese video game

You want to buy a game that's currently valued at $300+

You've never gone hunting

You've never gone fishing

You've been to a drive in theater

You've been to Florida

You've driven in a car for over 24 hours straight

You're not really close with any of your cousins

You're not a huge fan of chocolate

You've owned a pair of Uggs

You only use white clothing hangers

You try to keep the boxes for everything

You got your first job at 18

You've always had creative ways to make some extra cash

You have a tattoo that your parents don't know about

You got a tattoo as soon as you turned 18

You don't like kids

You always panic over the worst case scenario

You don't like wearing jeans

You don't like wearing pants in general

You haven't showered yet today

You've never gotten stitches

You hate whipped cream

You have Irish heritage

You're not religious

You gave your first BJ at 14

Your longest relationship was 2 years

You've never been asked on a date by a stranger

Your favorite music video is No One Knows by QOTSA

You have a very short temper

Your Youtube inspiration is SSSniperwolf

You've always wanted to start a cookie decorating business

You've always wanted to own a business in your own store instead of online

You've lived in the same town your entire life

You're going Pokemon hunting tonight

You like exploring

You've never had a full time job

You never want an office job

You've never been to Warped tour and never want to go

You own 5+ copies of one of your favorite games

You put a lot of effort into your Instagram page

[skeletorific]

My dude, I keep imagining singing sappy love songs to the Edgy skelebros and watching them turn beet red. Can I have a little scenario? -K

I FORGOT ABOUT THIS PROMPT WHEN I SAID I WAS OUT OF FLUFF. Also I think I maaay have gone a bit angsty on Boss’, but that song always just really reminds me of him? it kind of gives off that straddling between longing and romance i was feeling for the scenario, and I’m a sucker for ldr cliches

UF!Sans: Sans checks his phone for the fifth time this hour, trying to figure out the soonest time he can start dropping hints to go home.

To be perfectly honest, this hasn’t been as bad as he was expecting. When you said you wanted him to meet your friends tonight he had been planning exit strategies pretty much since he walked in the door. But it hadn’t been that terrible. Clearly you’d briefed them on his own issues with personal space and overtalkativeness, so they’d mostly let him be, not harassing him with too many questions or trying to hard to get him to talk. They were okay people, which was high praise from him.

Still, he was starting to burn out, and at this point didn’t want to do much more than get home and crash with you on the couch until he fell asleep. But it looked to be a few more minutes before he could.

One of your friends had brought out a guitar and was pestering you to sing something with them. You were resistant to it, which was honestly a damn shame. Your voice was gorgeous, and it was something you didn’t share that often. Still, he was too tired and irritated to really think much about it, and his fingers were starting to tap restlessly against the chair he was slumped in, shoulders tense.

You were starting to register his shifting, and decided it was time to make an exit soon. “For the last time, no.” You stretched your arms a bit, feigning more fatigue than you actually felt (although you were starting to reach your limit too). “Look, I’m getting kind of tired. Should probably head home.”

“Come ooooonnn.” Your friend said, clasping their hands and making exaggerated puppy dog eyes. “Don’t make me beg. You know I’ll do it, and it’ll be super awkward for everyone here.”

You looked at Sans again, who was giving you mildly pleading looks. Still, you had a feeling you weren’t getting out of here until you appeased them at least a little. You sighed. “One song.”

They nodded eagerly. “Can be as short and sweet as you please.”

“Alright, let me just look up the chords.” You pull out your phone. Immediately a text appeared.

Red: whhhyyyyyyyy

You: Just one song, then I promise, we’ll go home

You looked up, seeing him looking at you irritatedly. You thought for a second, then smiled.

You: Sit back and enjoy the show at least. I’ll make it worth your while

Red: ?

You: you’ll see.

You google the chords, then hand them over to your friend, who studies them for a bit. They sigh and roll their eyes, starting to get their hand into position. “You are such a cliche.”

“Hey, you said it could be whatever I wanted.”

They shook their head, but smiled as they started strumming.

Red stifled a sigh and settled in. Hopefully you’d chosen something short, at least. And he could, at least, think of worse things to do with his time than watch you sing.

You waited a few seconds, clearing your throat slightly as they started the intro. You looked him, right in the eyes, and smiled, before opening your mouth.

“Do you hear me?

I’m talking to you

Across the water, across the deep

blue ocean

Under the open sky, oh my, baby I’m trying

Boy, I hear you in my dreams

I feel your whisper across the sea

I keep you with me in my heart

You make it easier when life gets hard”

Oh…..stars. You were looking right at him, drinking him in like….like he was everything you wanted to see. He could feel a flush climbing on his cheekbones that he was trying his best to stifle.

Lucky I’m in love with my best friendLucky to have been where I have beenLucky to be coming home again

Welp, no luck stifling that blush now. Despite his intense desire to sink into the chair and evaporate, he found himself leaning closer, his eyes fixed on your mouth, watching them shape ever syllable. Your friend glanced up from the guitar and caught sight of him. They shook their head and rolled their eyes, but smiled and kept playing.

They don’t know how long it takes

Waiting for a love like this

Every time we say goodbye

I wish we had one more kiss

I’ll wait for you, I promise you, I will

Your eyes were tracing every inch of him and he could’ve sworn you were leaning closer. He could feel his SOUL thrumming in his chest and he felt a sudden panicked relief that none of the others were there. He’d never live this down and frankly, he was enjoying the show too much to want to care.

I’m lucky we’re in love in every way

Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed

Lucky to be coming home someday

As the final notes rang out you felt the hard press of bones on your hand and suddenly your chest constricted in what was becoming a familiar sensation. Everything went black and you were back home, being pulled into a tight hug.

“Red!” You say. Ignoring you, he starts kissing down your neck. “Red, we didn’t- oh for gods’ sakes.” You pull out your phone to text them and tell them at least a goodbye, only to have it pulled out of your hands and tossed onto the couch. “Reeeeed”

“Yer a fuckin dork, ya know that?” He pulls you down onto the chair, positioning you on his lap and kissing up the side of your face. “A damn sap.”

You hum softly, nestling against his shoulder and smiling. “So what does that say about you then.”

“Easy.” He grabbed your chin and pulled you into a deep kiss. “I’m the dumbass who falls for it. Every.” He kissed your chin. “Damn.” Your jaw. “Time.”

The next few weeks you swear you hear him humming the song, although when confronted he denies it intently. You should sing for him more often, though. He’s putty in your hands for hours afterwards.

UF!Papyrus: “CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW!”

You wince slightly as your boyfriend’s shrill voice crackles the speaker. “Yeah, yeah, I can hear you.”

Through the grainy filter of his webcam you see him slip more fully into frame, relaxing against his chair. “CAN YOU SEE?”

You nod, smiling. “Best view I’ve had all day.”

He smirks, looking pleased. “OBVIOUSLY. HOW WERE REHEARSALS?”

You shrug. “It’s fine. It’s a week or two till the stage gets set up, so they were mostly goofing off, but I think we’ll be ready.”

“YOU’RE IN CHICAGO.” Not a question. Papyrus knew your tour schedule better than you did. “ANYTHING WORTH SEEING?”

You shrugged. “Not much I have time for between concert miscellanea and rehearsals. There’s an aquarium I might hit before we go.”

He nodded.

“So how’ve things been back home?”

“UNEVENTFUL. UNDYNE CONTINUES TO REJECT MY APPLICATIONS TO TAKE OVER HER FORMER POSITION AND SANS HAS GONE TO WAR WITH ANOTHER HOT DOG MERCHANT.”

“Wait….what?”

“THEIR STALLS ARE POSITIONED ACROSS FROM EACH OTHER. HE IS TRYING TO CONVINCE FRISK TO SABOTAGE THEIR GRILL.”

“Oh my gods.” you laughed. “I assume they haven’t agreed.”

“EVIDENTLY. HE’S CURRENTLY PLANNING ALTERNATE MODES OF SABOTAGE. I WILL NOT PARTICIPATE IN SUCH IDIOCY, OBVIOUSLY. EVEN IF HE DID ASK ME.”

“…..feeling left out, huh babe?”

“SHUT UP.”

“Make me~” You say, grinning.

A sudden pang runs through you. At home, this would’ve resulted in him chasing you through the house, threats after you, only to be caught and kissed because he really had no plan. Over Skype, though, he could only look annoyed and mildly amused.

You missed him. Obviously. Well, to be fair, it wasn’t…awful. You were only on tour for around a year, and thanks to Sans’ teleporting abilities he could visit a lot more frequently than any of your bandmates’ partners could. But still, between his work with the guard and your constant busyness with rehearsals and promotions and choreography…..it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t the same as living in the same house, just having that presence whenever you wanted it (and even sometimes when you didn’t). It wasn’t the same as casual touches, accidental or not, instead of meticulously scheduled ones.

From what you could read on his face, you had a feeling some similar thoughts were running through his head.

“Uh…..hey.” you said, shifting a bit. “I….I found this new song. Won’t be able to play it on stage or anything, but I’ve been playing the chords over and over. Do you, uh….want to hear it?”

He freezes for a second. “ONE MOMENT.” He stood up and you heard the door slam. You bit back a small chuckle. No matter how many times you played for him he was still a blushing mess every time. And obviously, no one could see the Great and Terrible Papyrus looking like that.

He came back and sat back down, positioning himself so you couldn’t see his face (and by extension, his blush) clearly. “GO AHEAD.”

You grin to yourself but duck to cover it. “Alright.” Your keyboard, the cheap but portable one you kept for late-night songwriting, was nearby, so you pulled it a little closer to your desk. You tapped for a couple of seconds until you remembered it and you started playing the intro.

I found god

I found him in a lover

When his hair falls in his face

And his hands so cold they shake

I found the devil

I found him in a lover

And his lips like tangerines

In his color-coded speak

You could feel yourself giving into the music, the same way you always did, but you managed a glance upwards. He had barely moved, but you thought his hands might be clutching the armrests a little harder than was technically necessary.

Now we’re lost somewhere in outer space

In a hotel room where demons play

They run around beneath our feet

We roll around beneath these sheets

I’ve got a lover, a love like religion

I’m such a fool for sacrifice

He’s coming down, down, coming down

It’s coming down, down, coming down

Out of the corner of his eye you could see him leaning closer and closer, over the desk. His face had gone still, quietly watching you.

I found a martyr

He told me that I’d never

With his educated eyes

And his head between my thighs

I found a savior

I don’t think he remembers

Cause he’s off to pay his crimes

And he’s got no time for mine

His forehead was practically pressing to the laptop, and you missed him so much it ached, but with every word that pain was taking form and lifting off your shoulders.

Every single night pray the sun will rise

Every single time make a compromise

Every single night pray the sun will rise, but

It’s coming down, down, coming down

He’s coming down, down, coming down

You played the final chords, and relaxed back from the piano, closing your eyes to clear your head a bit. After a minute or two you opened them and turned back to the camera. “So….what’d you think.”

“I LOVE YOU.”

It came out abruptly, and its not like its the first time he’s said it, but it hits you like a physical blow, and you can feel tears springing to your eyes. You wipe them away quickly as you grin. “Love you too.”

“YOU’RE COMING HOME SOON?”

You lean forward, relaxing against your forearms on the desk. “Just another couple of months. Could you…..could you come visit soon though?”

He nodded. Gods, the look on his face….he looked almost shaken, but red-faced and happy.

You look at the clock. “I should get some sleep. Early day tomorrow.”

He nodded again. “I’LL CALL YOU TOMORROW.”

“Sounds good.”

Slowly, hesitantly, he holds his hand up to the screen. It catches you off guard. Kind of a cliche long distance thing to do, but….Papyrus was never much for gestures like that. Still, not wanting the moment to pass, you pressed your hand to the outline of his. It looked, as it always did, so much smaller.

“GOOD NIGHT.”

“Night, love.”

The blush heightened again, and he mumbled something incomprehensible.

“What was that.”

“…..BE SAFE, MY DEAREST.”

Now its your turn to blush, and you open your mouth to reply, when there’s a loud banging noise on his end that makes you both jump.

“Boss, you dyin in there or what?”

“SANS, GO AWAY!”

[fifidunks]

hi fifi. i'm so incredibly lonely. and 3 days ago I got my heart broken so bad. what should I do to ease this pain? i see no perspectives in my life and ive been feeling this way for the last 5 years or so. thank you

you’ve funny timing angel. under the force of Saturn, relegated to my bedroom for lack of FUNds, I just started writing personal stuff again. waking up with words on my fingertips… their goal seems to be to cast a s-p-e-l-l that’ll set me & all my girls free. so we can stop taking things so personally. this morning:

All my life, or since puberty at least, it’s been easy for me to see that others were alive and hard for me to feel it except in extremes. I’ve sought to exist with regards to others by feeling seen, by getting hurt, and by loving like it’s a service. This lead to crisis.Most of the women in my life seem to be afflicted with something similar. We’ve anxiety disorders. Suffer depressions. Bipolar swings. And furies. We’ve anger and overcompensatory vanity and intellection. High-achievers, my girls are public successes, even famed. But I’ve seen them in their living rooms, gauntly yellow, telling me if they didn’t perform as they do, they’d kill themselves, and that anyway, they’re convinced they’re dying or will soon, which is probably true, if they think it. Becoming real friends with real women changed my life. It was maybe the first step to becoming real which I hope to soon. I want to take their pain away. I will eat it like I do my feelings, slathered in nut butter. And I will shit it in the form of writing. Everything I write is shit; why do I think this? 

That was something like a riff on this diary entry, from dec 23/16 (sorry sleepy you’re getting copy/pastes):

from ~puberty until recently (i’m 29), i experienced Life like gravity that is under low to high tenor anxiety with bouts of low to deep depression, blue moons of depersonalization, and breathtaking reprieves of manic joy, lust, hunger, anger, inspiration, illusion, freedom, n fun, usually facilitated by drugs, especially that most potent one - love. i thought this was “normal” not that i wanted to be normal - in fact, my wanting to be + have more more ______ is largely responsible it seems for the anxiety depression mania etc. only now do i get - oh wait - u can live day in n out in blissful simple stable renewable energy generous blessed okay so so so okay with being OK just dust laughing awestruck responsible plus bigger orgasms. never too late to remember how to be. love, fifips this was here all along ofcpps respect we may lose it again truthfully it’s very likelyppps bliss has a lot to do w/ accepting lack it seems, while anxiety/depression/addiction - addiction - is filling that void which can’t be

So after that day, as if to check my hubris, Life brought me Drama & I “lost” It again. he he.

Then last night my something like a boyfriend who I avoid when I’m not Real cause how could he love something that’s not Real? called me “not to judge but…” (I’ve been unreal more than less since Dec 24.) he ended up reading me this letter by Rilke, which his dad had shared with him, and which he prefaced with “it’s common—maybe you’ve heard it.” I hadn’t. I’ll share it with you now, as for some reason I’m assuming you’re a woman, and those lines made me cry, and even if woman’s not how you identify, it’s all good, and this is really what I want to get to, that loneliness is so good dude, first step to solitude (read it out loud): 

…you should not let yourself be confused in your solitude by the fact that there is something in you that wants to move out of it. This very wish, if you use it calmly and prudently and like a tool, will help you spread out your solitude over a great distance. Most people have (with the help of conventions) turned their solutions toward what is easy and toward the easiest side of the easy; but it is clear that we must trust in what is difficult; everything alive trusts in it, everything in Nature grows and defends itself any way it can and is spontaneously itself, tries to be itself at all costs and against all opposition. We know little, but that we must trust in what is difficult is a certainty that will never abandon us; it is good to be solitary, for solitude is difficult; that something is difficult must be one more reason for us to do it. It is also good to love: because love is difficult. For one human being to love another human being: that is perhaps the most difficult task that has been entrusted to us, the ultimate task, the final test and proof, the work for which all other work is merely preparation. That is why young people, who are beginners in everything, are not yet capable of love: it is something they must learn. With their whole being, with all their forces, gathered around their solitary, anxious, upward-beating heart, they must learn to love. But learning-time is always a long, secluded time ahead and far on into life, is—; solitude, a heightened and deepened kind of aloneness for the person who loves. Loving does not at first mean merging, surrendering, and uniting with another person (for what would a union be of two people who are unclarified, unfinished, and still incoherent—?), it is a high inducement for the individual to ripen, to become something in himself, to become world, to become world in himself for the sake of another person; it is a great, demanding claim on him, something that chooses him and calls him to vast distances. Only in this sense, as the task of working on themselves (“to hearken and to hammer day and night”), may young people use the love that is given to them. Merging and surrendering and every kind of communion is not for them (who must still, for a long, long time, save and gather themselves); it is the ultimate, is perhaps that for which human lives are as yet barely large enough. But this is what young people are so often and so disastrously wrong in doing they (who by their very nature are impatient) fling themselves at each other when love takes hold of them, they scatter themselves, just as they are, in all their messiness, disorder, bewilderment… : And what can happen then?  What can life do with this heap of half-broken things that they call their communion and that they would like to call their happiness, if that were possible, and their future? And so each of them loses himself for the sake of the other person, and loses the other, and many others who still wanted to come. And loses the vast distances and possibilities, gives up the approaching and fleeing of gentle, prescient Things in exchange for an unfruitful confusion, out of which nothing more can come; nothing but a bit of disgust, disappointment, and poverty, and the escape into one of the many conventions that have been put up in great numbers like public shelters on this most dangerous road. No area of human experience is so extensively provided with conventions as this one is: there are live-preservers of the most varied invention, boats and water wings; society has been able to create refuges of very sort, for since it preferred to take love-life as an amusement, it also had to give it an easy form, cheap, safe, and sure, as public amusements are. It is true that many young people who love falsely, i.e., simply surrendering themselves and giving up their solitude (the average person will of course always go on doing that — ), feel oppressed by their failure and want to make the situation they have landed in livable and fruitful in their own, personal way —. For their nature tells them that the questions of love, even more than everything else that is important, cannot be resolved publicly and according to this or that agreement; that they are questions, intimate questions from one human being to another, which in any case require a new, special, wholly personal answer —. But how can they, who have already flung themselves together and can no longer tell whose outlines are whose, who thus no longer possess anything of their own, how can they find a way out of themselves, out of the depths of their already buried solitude? They act out of mutual helplessness, and then if, with the best of intentions, they try to escape the conventions that is approaching them (marriage, for example), they fall into the clutches of some less obvious but just as deadly conventional solution. For then everything around them is — convention. Wherever people act out of a prematurely fused, muddy communion, every action is conventional: every relation that such confusion leads to has its own convention, however unusual (i.e., in the ordinary sense immoral) it may be; even separating would be a conventional step, an impersonal, accidental decision without strength and without fruit. Whoever looks seriously will find that neither for death, which is difficult, nor for difficult love has any clarification, any solution, any hint of a path been perceived; and for both these tasks, which we carry wrapped up and hand on without opening, there is not general, agreed-upon rule that can be discovered. But in the same measure in which we begin to test life as individuals, these great Things will come to meet us, the individuals, with greater intimacy. The claims that the difficult work of love makes upon our development are greater than life, and we, as beginners, are not equal to them. But if we nevertheless endure and take this love upon us as burden and apprenticeship, instead of losing ourselves in the whole easy and frivolous game behind which people have hidden from the solemnity of their being, — then a small advance and a lightening will perhaps be perceptible to those who come long after us. That would be much. We are only just now beginning to consider the relation of one individual to a second individual objectively and without prejudice, and our attempts to live such relationships have no model before them. And yet in the changes that time has brought about there are already many things that can help our timid novitiate. [This was where I started to bawl.] The girl and the woman, in their new, individual unfolding, will only in passing be imitators of male behavior and misbehavior and repeaters of male professions. After the uncertainty of such transitions, it will become obvious that women were going through the abundance and variation of those (often ridiculous) disguises just so that they could purify their own essential nature and wash out the deforming influences of the other sex. Women, in whom life lingers and dwells more immediately, more fruitfully, and more confidently, must surely have become riper and more human in their depths than light, easygoing man, who is not pulled down beneath the surface of life by the weight of any bodily fruit and who, arrogant and hasty, undervalues what he thinks he loves. This humanity of woman, carried in her womb through all her suffering and humiliation, will come to light when she has stripped off the conventions of mere femaleness in the transformations of her outward status, and those men who do not yet feel it approaching will be astonished by it. Someday (and even now, especially in the countries of northern Europe, trustworthy signs are already speaking and shining), someday there will be girls and women whose name will no longer mean the mere opposite of the male, but something in itself, something that makes one think not of any complement and limit, but only life and reality: the female human being. This advance (at first very much against the will of the outdistanced men) will transform the love experience, which is now filled with error, will change it from the ground up, and reshape it into a relationship that is meant to be between one human being and another, no longer one that flows from man to woman. And this more human love (which will fulfill itself with infinite consideration and gentleness, and kindness and clarity in binding and releasing) will resemble what we are now preparing painfully and with great struggle: the love that consists in this: the two solitudes protect and border and greet each other. And one more thing: Don’t think that the great love which was once granted to you, when you were a boy, has been lost; how can you know whether vast and generous wishes didn’t ripen in you at that time, and purposes by which you are still living today? I believe that that love remains strong and intense in your memory because it was your first deep aloneness and the first inner work that you did on your life. — All good wished to you, dear Mr. Kappus! Yours, Rainer Maria Rilke

MoreYou can always email. fad.duncan@gmail.com. I’d prefer it. I fear publicity aka the Internet lately. Words Are Not Safe Here. 

[raeloganthesonic06fangirl]

Easily among my favorite interpretations of the characters are of the BTAS variety.

I mean, I have seen and read and played a LOT of Batman universes, my consumption of the franchise is almost as limitless as my love for Sonic.

But easily, by far, my favorite interpretations are from BTAS, which was probably the earliest Batman series that I remember at all (I was born in '90, and the series began in '92, with many reruns on Cartoon Network back in the late 90s and early 2000s).

So much so that I kinda don't really care much for some of the more popular gritty Batman variations (I do like the Nolan films, if not for playing to the exact atmosphere I enjoy), because I hold the characters to this standard. And by that extension, the Tim Burton take on the movies, since they were the main inspiration behind the stylistic choices in BTAS.

((I did love Arkham City, tho, the voice acting reprisals really was the cherry on top))

But this show did such a good job humanizing the villains.

Penguin just wants acceptance, but his reputation and appearance hinders that to where he does only what he knows what he's best at.

Scarecrow is just a guy who has a bit of an unhealthy fascination with fear manipulation, and also was a college professor before his job was stripped from him for his horrible experimental methods. The tie in comics reveal that he really does miss teaching, and his goal for rehabilitation is to be a teacher again. Unfortunately, it's just too easy for him to lapse back (one comic done by some of the show's creators, though not entirely canon, has him relapse after he finds out a star student of his being abused by her boyfriend, and he goes ballistic, ties the guy up and starts dumping spiders, rats and leeches on him while in costume)

Harley Quinn was a psychologist in training before Joker sucked her into his twisted world, feeding her lie after lie. She's in an abusive relationship and isn't able to see it as such. Even Poison Ivy, the lady who specializes in toxic plants, has to tell her that the relationship is toxic and futily tries more than once to get Harley out of there.

On the subject of Poison Ivy, well, she's seems like she cares about nothing more than plants, but one episode does reveal that she does desire to start a family of her own, but she's unable to have her own kids because she's more plant than human now. Even after creating plant-human hybrids as a false family, she sadly reminisces over a photo album of a wedding that never really happened

Harvey Dent, Two-Face, what a case. He's Bruce's best friend, disfigured by fault of Batman (who accidentally bumped the guy who would hit the switch that triggers the blast to disfigure Harvey, and adding yet another thing that haunts Bruce's nightmares on a regular basis). Harvey is aware that Bruce hasn't given up on his recovery like most people, but Two-Face is willing to sabotage that. He cannot function without his two headed coin to make decisions, and in the sequel series, ends up developing a third personality (unknown to Harvey and Two-Face), who is even more messed up, and ends up leaving the poor man in his cell just babbling the same thing over and over.

What about Victor Fries, Mr Freeze? Dude ain't even pure evil, he just wanted to cure his terminally ill wife, but his funding was cut and an accident happened that made him unable to survive temperatures above freezing and left him with very little emotions to care. Even worse, his body deteriorates until he's really nothing more than a head. The tie in comics to the sequel series reveals that his wife was revived, but she moved on and remarried, and he just resigns to it because he just wants her to be happy, and live the life he can no longer give her. He doesn't care anymore, he's lost all motivation.

Jervis Tetch, Mad Hatter, is an interesting character. I prefer his BTAS interpretation, and honestly don't like the actual one in the comics for way too many reasons. But animated Jervis is interesting. He's a tech genius employed by Bruce, who has an obsession with Alice in Wonderland, falls for his coworker, goes off the deep end after being unknowingly friendzoned, and just deteriorates on his motives every single appearance since. I honestly think Jervis was probably the most "ill" of the Rogues Gallery, because his motives kept decaying, and he genuinely doesn't seem to understand WHY his actions are a problem (at one point thinking that trapping Batman in a perfect fantasy twice was altruistic), and while there's no excuse for his actions, it kinda sucks that the official canon basically confirmed that Jervis never left Arkham, even when it was relocated. He's still there, 40 years later, practically a vegetable from using his mind control technology too much. Jervis never rehabilitated. He's going to die in Arkham, trapped in the Wonderland of his mind. He does not even know...

There are so many to focus on, but these guys really stand out to me.

Out of all of them, the best I can give for canon is that Harley at least rehabilitated and was last seen as a grumpy grandmother in Batman Beyond.

She's the only one of the Rogues Gallery who is confirmed to have a good ending.

Never forget that the Penguin actually wanted to quit his life of crime once, and was going to be very happy

He even found a woman he was willing to propose to. Veronica Vreeland

Only to find out that she was intending to use him as a joke spectacle for a party, and hadn’t felt the same about him.

She was intending all along to use him as a joke conversation piece for her rich party friends

And the shattering of his heart turned him back to being a criminal.

Veronica Vreeland used him.

He really did want to be good.

“All I wanted was a little friendship, that would have cost you nothing.”

[idkyeol]

Airport Troubles

Finally, the trip you had been planning for 3 years was finally here. You, Your sister Zoe, and her best friend Amy were traveling to South Korea. You get to the airport and wait to go through security. All the while the girls are laughing and talking about what they wanted to do. "I wanna to try to meet BTS!" "Dude I'm going to find Kyungsoo and make him love me." You start laughing at the girls. "Don't get ahead of yourself." As soon as we get settled in for our long flight, all of us pass out.

A 13 hour flight and you're finally there. As you make your way to baggage claim, you noticed the crowd getting bigger. "Okay guys, we need to push through this crowd and get to that bathroom." You go first and as soon as you make it you get pushed. Everything in your hands is knocked down. As you bend to get it, your face makes contact with a tall man's head and all you see is starts. "What the fuck?!" You exclaim while being drug to the bathroom by Amy. While you're being cleaned up Zoe is frozen in place. Standing in front of her was Chanyeol, Xiumin, and Chen from EXO. Chanyeol has a panicked look on his face. Xiumin writes out a note and hands it to Zoe. "We have to run but please have her call us as soon as she can!" Chanyeol was still panicking. "We need to stay and...." before he could finish his sentence a crowd of girls chases them.

Once you were able to clean up you went out to find Zoe. She looks pale. "Is everything okay?" You ask. She thrusts the paper into your hand. "Holy shit, park Chanyeol is the one who hit me!!" Zoe very excitedly told you the whole story. One very expensive taxi ride later, the girls were at the hotel and you were in the hospital. While you're waiting for the doctor you decide to text the number. Putting blame on whoever's phone it is for the hospital stay. A few minutes later and the doctor comes in. He starts talking very fast and you don't know much Korean. He shakes his head and leaves. Your phone starts ringing it and you answer it in almost tears. "Hello?" "Its all over the news that Chanyeol hit you. Did you tell....wait are you crying?!" "Who is this?" "It's min...Xiumin from EXO." Before you can respond the doctor comes back and try to tell him you cant understand. Then you hear Xiumin speak. "Give him the phone ill translate." You hand it over and doctor has a pleased look on his and hands it back. "What did he say?" Xiumin says that the doctor said I'm fine but I need to stay overnight. I start crying telling him I can't stay here alone. "Well than good thing I told him I was coming down." Before you can respond he hangs up.

You were fussing over how you looked, so you didn't even realize he was there. "You look fine for someone who was just beat up." He says with a laugh. You look over at him shocked. He smiles and all you can say is "why are you here? " "well i just wanted to make sure....." before he can finish i cut him off "drop the act. You just want me to sign something saying I won't sue SM." "Well that's partly true. But it's more of SM will cover any and all medical bills pertaining to this and a confidential agreement." You take it from him and sign it. Then hand it back. "Now can you please leave?" He laughs "no can do." He says while sitting down. "What do you mean?" You ask confused. "Well the doctor thinks I'm your boyfriend and asked me to stay." "But don't you have work?" He laughs "i cleared my schedule. I'm yours until you get discharged."

You fall asleep a few minutes later. Xiumin sits there and after a bit he calls his manager to explain what's going on. "When she's discharged ill take her to the house." After a short nap you wake up suddenly. You sit up and accidentally hit your face. "Holy shit!!!" You yell and it causes Xiumin to jump. Once you explain what happens he asks if he can sit on the bed with you. You agree and as soon as he sat with you the door bursts open and the nurse runs in. She frowns when she sees you laying against his shoulder. He explains what happened and she leaves. After a few minutes of talking you both fall asleep. When you wake up you're hot. Finally you realize that it's Xiumin cuddling you. Once you're both up the doctor comes in and explains that you were free to go and to make a follow up appointment. Trying to make small talk in the car you bring up the nurse. "What was up with that nurse? She literally glared at me every time she came in. Then when she brought me breakfast she spilt juice on me." Xiumin visibly shudders. "She kept trying to ask me out and I denied her." "That's so weird." Xiumin smiles. "I am so sorry if I caused you any trouble, Xiumin." He laughs again. "You can call me Minseok."

After a short ride to the dorm, you guys pull up to a big house. You look at him and he laughs. "We tell people we live in a dorm to keep them off Of our tracks." As we walk up to the door it swings open. Before you can react you're pulled into a hug. You can't see who it is but you hear Minseok talk to the person. "Chanyeol-ah, please leave her be." He hugs tighter and apologizes. "Thank you, Chanyeol." Then all 3 of you walk into the house. As soon as you get to the foyer to take your shoes off someone rounds the corner. It's Baekhyun. He gasps. "Wow. Chan really fucked up your pretty face." The comment made everyone laugh and Chanyeol groan. "Please let me make it up to you!" You laugh."now how are you going to do that Mr. Park?" He ponders the question for a few minutes. "How about I extend your trip?!" You looked at him like he's insane. "No! I couldn't ask you to do that!" He laughs and runs off. "I'm going to do it now!" All of the other boys start laughing. You introduce yourself to the boys you hadn't met yet. Everyone wants very welcoming and made you feel comfortable. Baekhyun sits next to you on the sofa. "So do you like video games?"

A few of the boys had schedules so you stayed to hang out with Minseok, Baekhyun, and Jongdae. Before Chanyeol left he gave you all the information for your trip extension. He made you promise that you would come see him while you're here. After playing Mario Kart for hours the boys decide to put on a movie. At some point you start to doze off and you unconsciously lay on Minseok's shoulder. Suddenly, your phone rings. You see who it is and run to another room. You answer and it's a FaceTime call from your daughter and her dad. You talk to her for a few minutes and explain to your ex that you'll be staying longer. Once you end the call you see Baekhyun by the door. "Oh! Was that your family?!" You smile. "Yes. That was my daughter and her dad, my ex husband." You hesitate for a minute and get up. "Well I should probably get back to my sister." You rush towards the door and Baekhyun grabs your arm. "Wait! Why? Don't you want to say goodbye?" You shake your head and put your shoes on. "But I think Minseok hyung really likes you." You laugh and shake your head. "Yeah but once he finds out I'm a single mom?" You hug Baekhyun and he tries to stop you again "he won't mind, I know him!" You kiss his cheek, smile but before you can leave he grabs your phone and calls himself. "You better respond to my texts!" He warns before showing you to the door.

You make your way back to the hotel and the girls are surprised you had been gone so long. You explain how the day went, leaving out the whole hanging out with EXO. Explained to them about Chanyeol extending the trip and went to bed. Over the next week or so you and Baekhyun has become close. He would give you suggestions on things to do and you guys had coffee a few times. He tried to bring up Minseok but you wouldn't let him. He didn't push the issue anymore. One morning you wake up to an empty room. The girls left a note saying they were going to BigHit to see if they could get a tour of the building. You decide to get up and get ready for your day. You planned on relaxing at the spa the hotel had. You go out and get some food then go back to your room. As you're walking in your phone rings. You answer and the screaming starts. "YOU HAVE TO COME GET US!!! We're being held at BigHit. They think we're are crazy fans." You freak out. "Okay okay! I'm going to call Baek and see if he can help me! I'll be there asap." You hang up and call him. Of freaking course he isn't answering his phone. You rack your brain and there is only one other person that can help: Minseok.

You hesitate but realize that you have to suck it up and call. It rings a few times. You start to panic. He finally picks up and you explain the situation and he says he will meet you there. You book it to the building and Minseok runs up the same time you do. Right behind him is Kyungsoo who runs past and into the building. Minseok grabs your arm and stops you from following him. "We need to talk." Of course you start to think of all the bad things he can say. "Well I'm a little busy with my sister..." he laughs "why do you think Kyungsoo is here?"  He grabs your arm and runs off. You two arrive at the SM building and you're confused. You're ushered into an office where Chanyeol and their manager sat. They all start talking really fast and you can't keep up. You look over at Xiumin and he apologizes. "Apparently the nurse from the hospital was upset that I didn't accept her request for a date and took pictures of us sleeping. She tried to blackmail me so we are making you aware since she might come after you." You sigh and wait for them to continue. "Oh! They need an update on your condition." You explain everything. "Well I have to have surgery when I get home since my nose was half broken." Chanyeol's eyes open impossibly wide. Which makes you and Minseok laugh. "It's fine, Chan." You say with a laugh. "Well now that that's out of the way, we should get back to the house!" Minseok exclaims.

Once back at the house, you walk in and hear squealing. You run to the living room and see Yixing dancing for the girls. He looks up at you. "You must be the pretty girl Chanyeol beat up?" You feel your cheeks flush and Yixing laughs. He tries to grab your hand but you're yanked away by Minseok. This makes everyone laugh. "I guess we should get going." As you finish your sentence Kyungsoo pops his head out of the kitchen and tells everyone that dinner is almost ready and everyone is eating. You yawn before agreeing. Minseok looks concerned. "Do you wanna go lay down?" You nod your head yes. He leads you to his room and flops down. You sit next to him and start to nod off. Your head hits his shoulder and he holds you hand. You can feeling your heart racing. He lace your fingers together and signs. "I missed you. I couldn't get you out of my head." You chuckle and he continues. "Why did you ignore me?" You sigh and start to talk. But your phone interrupts you. "Well. I have a 3 year old daughter who is with her dad, my ex husband. Wanna meet her?" He smiles and agrees. You answer and see her.

"Hi baby!" She gets excited and yells "mama!" This makes you laugh and you ask her if she wants to meet Minseok. "Hi! It's nice to meet you." She gives him a puzzled look and it looks like a lightbulb goes off in her head. "Mama has your picture in our house!" She screams. You feel your face flush and he smiles. Then we hear another voice. Your ex starts to talk and Minseok turns the phone to you. "Who was that?" He demands. Before you can answer your daughter speaks up. "Daddy that's EXO!" He visibly stiffens. "Can you please not have whatever dude you're currently fucking talk to our child." You roll your eyes and see that Minseok looks pissed. He squeezes your hand, sensing you're upset. "Anyway." You sigh out. "Why don't you call her back when you aren't busy." He yells before hanging up the call. You feel the tears flood your eyes. Minseok pulls you into him and you both lay down. Once your crying finally stops you feel sleep pulling you in. Minseok makes a move to get up and you grab his arm. "Please don't go." He lays back down and snuggles up to you, kissing your forehead. The last thing you hear before you succumb to sleep is his voice. "I'm not going anywhere."

You wake up a few hours later by yourself. You see the time and jump up. Minseok walks in and stops you. "Nope. You're going back to sleep. Kyungsoo is setting the girls up in the living room." You smile and plop back onto the bed. "Okay. Sounds good. But I need something from you." Minseok smiles and urges you to go on. "Will you cuddle with me?" You shyly ask. He smiles and jumps in the bed. He snuggles up to you. You roll over so you can face him. You both stare at each other for a few minutes before he leans in and kisses you. You smile and as he pulls away he whispers "I really like you." You feel your cheeks heat up and tell him it's a mutual feeling. You lean in this time and kiss him. It gets heated very quickly and He rolls onto his back and pulls you with him so you're straddling his hips. He continues kissing you as his hands creep up the back of your shirt. Just as he reaches to pull it off the bedroom door swings open. Chen walks in and it takes him a minute to register what's happening. "Oh my god you guys. Lock the door." You and Minseok start laughing and you roll off of him. "Maybe we should wait until we have more privacy." You say to a pouty Minseok.

The next morning you wake up to Minseok snuggling you. He looks so pretty. You start to run your fingers through his hair. He stirs in his sleep so you stop. Then you hear him mumble "why did you stop?" Which causes you to giggle and continue. With his eyes closed he starts to ask you about your plans for the day. "The girls and I are going to go shopping and explore. What about you?" He finally sits up so he can talk properly. "I have some recording to do, then I'm free." You laughs at his cheesy smile. "So does that mean I can see you again tonight?" He doesn't respond right away. You start to regret asking when he speaks up. "Of course. I want you to be here anytime you can." He leans in and presses a kiss to your lips. There's a knock on the door. Baekhyun walks in covering his eyes. The both of you laugh. "Baek we aren't doing anything." He sighs "okay good. Min, we have to leave in 45 minutes." Then he leaves the room. You start to get up. "I guess that means I have to leave." Before you can react Minseok grabs your arm and spins you to face him. "I wasn't done with you." Then his lips are on yours. When he pulls away you smile and run off. He chases you and slide across the floor. You fell on your butt and he was on you. You pull his face to yours and start kissing him. Then you hear a round of cheers from the living room. He jumps up and helps you up. "I'll call you when I'm done."

You and the girls spend the day out exploring. Once you were all burnt out, you went back to the hotel. As the three of you were relaxing you got a phone call. It was Chanyeol. "Hey Noona! So Minseok hyung has been asking when you're leaving. I don't know if I should tell him....." you thought about it. "Don't tell him! I don't want it to spoil the rest of our time here. Also could I come over before Min gets home? I wanna make you guys dinner." He laughs. "Of course Noona. Meet me there in 20." He hung up and you rounded the girls up. Shortly after you received a text from Jongin. You didn't even know he had your number. He asked if we could make him chicken. So we decided to make fried chicken and mashed potatoes.  We meet Kyungsoo at the store so he can help us get everything. Once we get back to the house we start cooking. Kyungsoo helps since he's never made American food. During the process your phone rings. You see that it's your daughter. You run to another room to take it. It's the ex's girlfriend. "Hey! How is everything?" You smile and tell her about everything. "So that's why he's been so pissy. So are you guys dating?" You laugh. "I don't know but I'm definitely falling in love and it's kind scary. He's amazing." She smiles. "Girl you deserve it." You talk to your daughter for a bit then hang up. What you didn't notice was Minseok listening from the door. He smiles and you cringe. "So who this amazing person you were talking about?" He says with a smirk. "Oh just Chanyeol. You know he's my bias." You say as you walk past him. "Oh no you don't!" He turns to grab you and you run. He reaches you before you make it to the kitchen. He pulls you around pushing you back to the wall. Then his lips are on yours. "I'm kinda sorta falling in love with you too." He whispers against your lips. The door swings open, Yixing and Junmyeon walk out. "Oh my god, can't you guys get a room?!" Junmyeon yells while Yixing is saying how cute it is. Once dinner is ready everyone sits down to eat. Everyone talked and laughed for hours. Once you realized what time it was, You and the girls headed back to the hotel since the boys had an early day.

The next morning you and the girls got shopping for outfits to the show that night. Once you're done you head back to the hotel to get ready. The only person who knows you're gonna be there is Baekhyun. Once you make it to the venue you guys decide to give away your meet and greet passes. An SM employee notices this and offers to allow you to meet the band backstage after the fan meet. You follow her back. She finds Suho and explains the situation. He sends her off and starts dying of laughter. "Hey guys. We have some fans here to meet us." All of them stand up and He moves aside. All of the members start cracking up. But you want to do the typical fangirl thing. After they introduce themselves, they take pictures and you all just hang out before the show. Minseok insisted that you watch from backstage. Every time he ran back, he would kiss you for luck. Once the concert was over, you followed the boys to their dressing room to say goodbye. After an round of sweaty hugs you guys leave. As you're leaving you see a small group of girls staring at you. One of them points at you and you realize it's the nurse from the hospital. Before you can react the group walks over and starts yelling. One of them tries to push you so you grab the girls and run. You realize they're chasing you. You decide to call Minseok.

"Hey!" He says when he answers. "He-hey. So we're in trouble. Some girls are chasing us." He flips out and asks where you are. "I have no idea Min. Oh here is a police station." You run in and he tells you to wait inside. The girls waiting outside. You hand your phone to a police officer who allows you to wait. About 15 minutes later you hear yelling. You look outside to see Minseok scolding the girls. He doesn't recognize the nurse, so speak up. "Hey Min, doesn't that girl look familiar.?" He looks and his eyes open wide. "You'll be here from my lawyer." Is all he says before walking over to you. He grabs and hugs you. "I am so sorry." He says with a frown. "Minseok, I don't blame you one bit." He smiles at your response. Your phone goes off and you pull it out. Before you can show Minseok, his phone rings. Once he hangs up he has a puzzled look and on his face. "Well those girls found out your name and leaked all of our information. Then he grins which confuses you. "So you and the girls are staying with us until you go home."

That's how the last bit of your trip, turned into a slumber party with EXO. They had a spare room that the girls stayed in and Jongdae moved in with Yixing. This gave you and Minseok you're own room. Once all your stuff with successfully moved with help of security guards from SM you got to spend all your free time with Minseok. Since he couldn't take you on a real date, he decided to come up with some pretty creative things to do. A lot of it was late at night but you didn't mind. You just loved that you guys were growing close. Since you were keeping the date you go home a secret from Minseok, it made everything that much better. The date was coming up fast. Minseok knew it was soon but you wouldn't tell him specifically. There was about 2 weeks left.

You started to notice your sister leaving a lot. But she wouldn't tell you where she was. Even the boys were becoming suspicious. This gave Baekhyun an idea. He teamed up with Jongdae to investigate. One night in particular she was asking to leave pretty late. Once again she wouldn't tell anyone where she was going. Once she left Baekhyun came bursting in the room. "Let's go guys! We're following her." You, Minseok, Baekhyun, and Jongdae get ready and go. You follow the car she got into. It went to another apartment complex that Baekhyun had seen before. "Why is she coming to the BTS dorm??" Everyone looks around confused. Baekhyun calls Taehyung to see if he's home. They talk for a few minutes. "She's dating Yoongi." We all stood there with our jaws dropped. Once we get home Minseok drags you to bed. "I have a surprise!" He exclaims. You look at him completely confused. He continues. "SM gave me the rest of the time you're here off!" You were ecstatic! You launched your body at his that was laying on the bed. You hugged him and he started giggling. "You seem happy." He laughed at. "Well yeah! I actually get your undivided attention! What great way to end my trip." You realize what you said and frown. "What's wrong?" He inquired. You could feel the tears welling up. You shook your head to try to rid yourself of them but before you could completely compose yourself, Minseok pulled you into his arms. You took a deep shaky breath. "Shh, don't think about it." He said hugging you tighter and then you felt the tears fall. You tried so hard to stop them but as soon as you felt some fall from above you sobbed. The two of you hugged for a bit longer before he whispered against you, thinking you couldn't hear him. But the minute the words left mouth you gasped.

You both get up to clean up for bed. Once you're both snuggled up together, you decide to respond. "Hey, Minseok?" He doesn't respond right away but then you hear him hum in reply. "I love you too." He presses his lips to yours. "Say it again." You giggle. "I love you Minseok" he kisses you again and you can feel him smiling. "I love you too." The next morning you wake up alone. As you get out of bed you hear laughing. You look at your phone and realize it's only 7am. You leave the room and get closer to the source. You hear the person giggle. "Oh Minseok Oppa. You're so cute." When you hear him laugh back you spin on your heels and head to the room. On your way back to the room, you run into Baekhyun. He notices you look awkward so he drags you to his room. Failing to get information out of you, he lets you go back to your room. Once you're there, you crawl back into bed. You text your sister to see if she has plans today. She explains she's going to see Yoongi and you ask to tag along. You get dressed and meet your sister in the living room. Baekhyun comes in. "Hey! What are you guys up to today?" He asks just as Minseok and his guest walk in. "Oh we're going to meet up with Yoongi and the other boys. They want to meet her." Your sister explains. Minseok gives you a puzzled look. You guys had plans today but his guest was making you feel unwanted. You smile at Minseok. "Well you seemed busy, so I figured our plans were canceled." The only person in the room to pick up on your attitude was Baekhyun. He almost lost it. Minseok gives him a stern look and walks away with his friend not far behind. "Oooo someone is jealous." Baekhyun teases. You scoff and walk to the room to grab your bag. Just as you're about to open the door you hear the girl speak. "Who are those girls, Minnie?" You wait to hear his response. "They're just...." he pauses before he finishes. "Baekhyun's friends." Your heart drops and you push the door open. Without making eye contact with either of them, you grab your bag. A wide eyed Minseok watches you but before he can speak you do. "Well, goodbye friend."

You decide to not allow your attitude or Minseoks words ruin your brunch with BTS. All of the boys are nice. You and Namjoon are having fun talking in English. After everyone finishes eating you guys decide to head out. Not wanting to rain on their date all of the members went their separate ways. You said goodbye to your sister. Before you could leave, namjoon stopped you. "I really enjoyed talking to you. Do you wanna maybe get coffee or something? Maybe you could tell me about your black eyes." You thought about it and remembered how bad you felt seeing Minseok with someone else. "I actually have some things to do but here's my number. You should text me!" He smiles and gives you a hug goodbye. You finally check your phone and have a flood of texts from Minseok. He asks you to call him so he can explain. So you do. What shocks you is who answers. "Hello? This is Minnie's phone." You're into too much shock to say anything. Then you hear him. "I told you not to touch my phone. God. Will just leave already?" This makes you giggle. Then he gets on the phone "hello?" You start laughing. "Oh my god. Thank you so much for calling me. I need to explain." You laugh again. "You have nothing to explain, Minnie." You tease. "Come home and save me please."

Once you get home, his guest is gone. He wraps you in a hug and kisses you. "I'm so sorry. Please don't be mad" you start laughing. "Minseok, of course I was mad but I'm not anymore. Plus I got asked out by Rap Monster." He stops "YOU WHAT?!" This causes you to laugh more. Then he explains that the girl was a family friend. His mom is getting concerned that he isn't married and tried to push her on him. "But to appease my mom, I have to go on a date with her." This made you laugh even harder. "It's fine Babe. I trust you." To which he hugged you even harder. Later that night you had Chanyeol confirm your flights and you guys were leaving in 3 days. Minseok still didn't know when and you didn't want him to. You spent the next couple of days just being lazy with the boys since they were all on light schedules. The night before you guys were leaving Minseok received a call from his mom. After talking to her he comes back to the living room. "So my date is tomorrow." Once the words leave his mouth, Chanyeol looks at you and you shake you head. "That's cool. Maybe she's the love of your life." You say teasing Minseok. You yells and then tickles you. "Stop! I'm gonna go shower!" You exclaim and leave the room. Before you can get into the bathroom, Chanyeol stops you. He can see your eyes full of tears and just hugs you. "Just tell him." You shake your head. "It's better this way." Chanyeol scoffs "for who?" After your shower you meet Minseok in the room. He's laying in bed. You walk over and he smiles his gummy smile at you. Before you can sit on the bed he sits up and pulls you into his lap. You smile down at him as he pulls your face to his. He presses his lips to yours. "Tell me you love me." You whisper. He starts kissing and punctuates every kiss with an "I love you." He continues to kiss down your neck to the rest of your body. You can feel every ounce of love he has for you come out with every action he assaults your body with. He pushes you into an abyss of pleasure where all you feel is love and affection around you.

The next morning you wake up before Minseok and decide to write him a letter to read once you're gone. Once everyone is up, lunch is made and everyone hangs out before Minseok has to leave for his date. He kisses you and goes on his way. Once he's gone, it's time to pack. Baekhyun is trying to talk you into calling Minseok.   You say your goodbyes to all of the boys and get into the taxi. You made Baekhyun promise he wouldn't call Minseok. As the taxi leaves the boys conspire. "She said I couldn't call him. Not that anyone else couldn't." So they all start calling. He isn't answering. They keep trying and then finally when Jongdae calls he answers. "She left! She's on her way to the airport now. Go dude. Forget that date!" Before Minseok can process Jongdae's words he's out the door. Ignoring the screams of his date.

You and the girls made it to the airport and are trying to get to security. Your sister is in tears having to leave Yoongi and here you were trying to keep it together. Just as you're about to get in line you hear a commotion. There is a huge crowd yelling. You decide to keep going, not bothering to pay attention. All of sudden you hear the girls gasp. You turn around and you're face to face with minseok. "Where do you think you're going?" Before you can respond he pulls you into his arms. "Please don't leave me. I need you." You let your tears fall. "You can't get rid of me that easy, Kim Minseok."