#Best Pichu

[altocat]

Merry Christmas & happy holidays, Alto!! 💖💖💖

*leaves present at your doorstep!*

🎁

It’sssssss a thousand more kudos on AMT!!!

Ty for sharing your gifts with us, friend—both your phenomenal writing & your golden heart!! <33 Alto fam forever!!!

🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️

Thank you, Pichu. That's so sweet. I hope you have an amazing holiday. And that you get all the gifts you could ever want.

[prismaticpichu]

The amount of times I’ve written Zack saying to Sephiroth, “You’re my best friend, bud...” has got to be a call for some level of concern.

*happily proceeds to write it again*

[boujeebunny8]

I remember seeing another fan art with Picchu and Pichu, so I thought I’d kinda do the same but add all the Pichu evaluations

(If you wanna use my art, feel free to. Just credit me.)

[fluffydeoxys]

was assigning pokemon to my OCs and started to think about what pokemon best fits each member of the madcom cast. i think I settled on porygon-z for tricky and mega scizor for hank, but I couldn't really think of the rest. might crack down on thinking about it cus I wanna draw it... my special interest crossover...

[rosy-crow]

CROWWWWWW!!!! WE LOVE YOU!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Sending so many hugs!!! 🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🫂🫂🫂 Ty for being the wonderful, supportive, kind soul that you are!!!!! Best birb!! 🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛❤️

HSHSHS THANK YOU PICHU!! You’re literally a beacon of light around here that I really love to see around 🫂🫂🫂 bless you!!!

[raspberryhoppip95]

[which-is-the-very-best]

★This is an elimination round for a larger poll! The winner from this group will move on to the next bracket round!★

[knownbyanothername]

doing well :)

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[typhos-c-dragon]

man my dad better appreciate these pittsburgh steelers-branded grilling tools i got for his secret santa gift this christmas. i bought them like 5 minutes after i pulled his name from the bucket, and they've just been sitting in their box in my room for months. and they cost. Way Too Fucking Much.

[altocat]

Ah! Let’s see here! *unfurls mile-long list*

• You understand Sephiroth & the crew better than the creators!

• Your prose is PHENOMENAL and artistic

• Your headcanons are steak levels of JUICCCY!!

• Your such a kind and generous soul

• You enjoy cats that are indeed alto <33

• You have glorious tastes in movies, music, and video games

• You draw people in with your wonderful, caring, and safe energy!

• You put 110% into everything you do, and it shows!!

Much love,

⚡️💖 🐁

THANK YOU, SMALL ELECTRIC MOUSE FREN

[prismaticpichu]

Pichu, I actually have to say 🐭 because you are the wholesome-est but I have seen some of your posts and read your fics, and you’re no pushover! I’m pretty sure Hojo would be running if he saw you coming! You ain’t gonna let him mess with Zack and Seph! 🐭🔪

*polishes plastic knife, chuckles under her breath*

You got that RIGHT, my friendo!! Ain’t NO ONE is messing with Zack & Seph around these parts!! (｀∀ ´)Ψ

I actually appreciate this a ton haha! As much as I live for the floofcanons, I do have a little fun with some darker feels now and then! (With a happy ending ofc.) So it really does mean a lot when my shot at the angstier side of things land!!

[lonelypep]

every smash bros character ranked by how good of a cook i think they’d be.

82: piranha plant

eating this dish will kill you instantly. turns out he spit some poison in there while no one was looking. and yeah, that sucks, but if you even accepted a meal from this guy i think you have bigger problems

81: ridley.

let’s be real, if you let this guy into the kitchen, you made a huge mistake. it’s like john mulaney’s horse in a hospital sketch: you never know what he’s gonna do next. you’re too focused on getting him out.

80: king k rool.

king k rool is many things. a king, a pirate, a scientist. but he is not a cook. he’ll try, but he has literally no clue what he’s even doing in the kitchen.

79: yoshi

yoshi will give you a dish and you’ll be like “what the fuck is this” and he’ll talk about how it was made from the finest newborns of his home planet. i’m deciding to ignore it but it’s really nagging at me.

78: sonic

sonic shouldn’t be on this list. because he wouldn’t make you any food. he’ll go to the local sonic and get a burger in about 3 minutes. it sucks. disqualified.

77: pac man

what can i say. it tastes like literal plastic. i don’t even wanna know how he made it. i’ll give it back to him but the nice thing about pac man is he wouldn’t give a shit.

76: bowser jr.

fuck this guy. he rage quit at making a grilled cheese. now there’s a literal canonball in the stove. now no one else can use it!! this is what happens when you spoil kids.

75: pikachu/pichu

these two are in the same category since they’d make the same thing. they’d get store bought french fries and fry them with lighting outside. it’s consistent, it works, just not really filling. and they don’t know how to make anything else.

74. wario

don’t get me wrong: he knows what he’s doing. he’s the burger king of smash. he’s this low because the burger is the most unhealthy shit you’ll ever have. eating it gave you chronic diarrhea, gastrointestinal issues, and permanently damaged your taste buds. but god fucking damn was it a good burger.

73. hero

he gave you a single piece of bread with butter on it. it’s not bad but…really dude?

72: olimar

he didn’t make you a bad meal, in fact it was one of the best here. but that’s because he didn’t make you something. it was the pikmin and he’s trying to pass it off as his own and the pikmin don’t know because they don’t speak english. 0/10: not fucking cool dude.

71: kazuya

honestly? i don’t trust this guy. i was too intimidated to even ask his name. from what i can gather no one even invited him to the party he just showed up and made a mediocre meal. what’s weird: someone came into the kitchen and claimed this guy killed their whole family. we never saw that guy again. needless to say, kazuya wasn’t invited to the afterparty.

70: link (botw)

don’t get me wrong here, link is a five star chef. he’s just really unsanitary. apparently he cut the meat and vegetables with the same sword he killed calamity ganon with. i don’t wanna taste that guy!! have you seen him?? not to mention he pulled the meal out of his pants. i don’t even know how it fit in there.

69: inkling

she made a pancake and i thought it was good! but i absolutely can’t condone this. inkling left so much fucking weird slime and shit all over my house. and got really competitive when she heard i was getting meals from everyone else. i hope they’re all ok.

68: ROB

it was so processed. the most processed food i’ve ever had in my entire life. it’s not his fault, rob is a great guy. but this tasted like literally nothing.

67: ice climbers

when they told me they were making dessert, i trusted them. but i let someone else taste test first. my best friend was sent to the hospital because of tongue frostbite. didn’t even know that was a thing. i made the ice climbers pay for it (they’re fucking loaded)

66: villager

he made isabelle do it. and she made something great! but i’m not giving this cretin credit for having the money to afford a five star chef. you don’t deserve it because you sold a shit ton of tarantulas villager!!

65: lucario.

dude got really mad and destroyed my kitchen. he’s REALLY lucky he got the burger PERFECTLY cooked.

64: male byleth.

like this dude knows how to cook. he can barely make chicken nuggets. he has to eat in the school cafeteria simply because he never learned how to cook a simple meal. but he’s a really nice guy. total himbo. love him.

63: ryu

i asked this guy what he likes to eat. big mistake. he then went on to say that his training regiment doesn’t condone copious indulgence (his words) and he lives off of nothing but protein shakes. you do you i guess.

62-61: fox/falco

these two went into the kitchen and came out with weird alien food. i didn’t eat it but everyone else seemed to enjoy it

60: greninja

when he first came out i was so excited. he came out with the most finely sliced food i had ever seen in my entire life. but it was soooo watered down. everything tasted like celery. how do you make crab taste like celery?? how??!

59-58: simon/richter

these guys both made the same exact fish recipe, came out at the same time, and proceeded to fight each other. i didn’t get to try any 😭

57-49: every fire emblem character.

genuinely, i can’t tell these guys apart. or their food choices. honestly, my bad. i’m sure they’re good. but where do i even start.

48: sheik

she doesn’t know how to cook. she kidnapped someone else. normally i wouldn’t put someone like that this high but a. i have gender envy b. it’s for the greater good (or so she said)

47: cloud

dude made a great sandwich but he kept screaming random noises while he did. personally, i’m just glad he managed not to destroy the kitchen. that’s a first here.

46: captain falcon

he promised he’d pick up some pizza but got into a car crash on the way there. eventually he got there after the car crash was all sorted out, but got into ANOTHER on the way back. i’m honestly kind of impressed

45: steve

steve could cook an absolutely fucking KILLER meal. he’ll even offer to do it for free. but you shouldn’t let him under any circumstances. he took 13 hours gathering materials and while the wait was, arguably, worth it, i never want to experience it again. (side note: we asked captain falcon to get some pizza while waiting which led to the aforementioned entry)

44: sora

sora doesn’t know how to cook but he’s by far the biggest name at this party. everyone fucking loves him. he’s friends with GOOFY. this dude hangs out with GOOFY. this guys has hung out with GOOFY AND jack sparrow. bad food but i could listen to this guy talk for hours about his story. i’m sure i’ll understand it all.

43-40: pokémon trainer

this guys organization is fucking atrocious. if he can actually get his shit together he’ll cook up some nice vegetarian meals, but that’s a big if.

HONORABLE MENTION: sans mii gunner

sans undertale is a world renowned, famous chef. his recipes are simple, but cooked with such love, care, and finess it turns a simple cheeseburger into a masterpiece. sans undertale would easily top this list. sans mii gunner is not sans undertale. he bought the real sans’ cookbook and thinks he’s some kind of cooking genius. and sure he’s got the recipes but none of the skill to actually make it.

39-38: samus/zero suit samus

hooray! we’re out of bad cook options now. samus is a great cook, but she’s so used to her alien delicacies she doesn’t know how to cook on earth anymore. shame, but i trust her to produce something edible.

37: shulk

he is really good at the grill. unfortunately, he refused to put a shirt on and made everyone a little uncomfy. that being said, he showed me the beach boys and i had never listened to them before. so he gets points.

36-35: pit/dark pit

these guys don’t know how to cook but the flew into the sky and killed some mythical bird for everyone to eat. i couldn’t have any, i’m pescatarian, but everyone else loved it.

34: bayonnetta

she opened a portal to a waffle house and a bunch of demons came flying out. she didn’t make anything, but honestly, absolutely legendary experience that was.

33: duck hunt

you’d think a dog wouldn’t bring anything meaningful. this would be false. that is the freshest duck i’ve ever seen in my entire life. (didn’t eat it: pescatarian)

32: king dedede

he made his legendary homemade mashed potatoes. everyone loved them. so creamy… weirdly perfect. too bad i hate the monarchy. sorry bud.

31: meta knight

meta knight is a great cook and should be higher. but i don’t want him to be. because he’s so fucking pretentious. he sliced all the food in front of everyone and wouldn’t shut up about radiohead. hate this guy.

30-29: daisy/peach

these two put all their private chefs together to make something for everyone. great catering, great food, but they didn’t technically make it. love them.

28: mewtwo

as if mewtwo wouldn’t just read someone’s mind and cook something. but it’s not mewtwo’s food…so…. sorry dude you cheated.

27: dark samus

she really surprised me here. she cooked up the most exquisite alien delicacies i’ve ever tasted in my entire life. should be higher. but unfortunately, i had to get a space parasite removed from my system by regular samus. honestly though… it was worth it.

26: ganon

he was rude to everyone about his cooking skills and wouldn’t stop bragging. asshole am i right? but surprised everyone by grilling his god damn heart out. he’s a bad try hard but like go off i guess.

25: isabelle

she’s trying her absolute fucking best and she deserves the world here. amazing cook, we need to save her from the island.

24: little mac

dude went so hard. brought new york pizza ALL THE WAY FROM NEW YORK. ok, not literally, but he made a damn good pizza

23: snake

full disclosure: snake doesn’t know how to cook. also no one knows he’s an agent. but he has to cook to blend in so you BEST BELIEVE this man is going to COOK like his life depends on it.

22-20: young link, ness, and lucas

all these guys are incredibly mature for their age. surprised everyone at this party. i had deep and philosophical conversations with all of them about appreciating life. i fucking cried. oh and they made everyone sandwiches, and even took my pescatarianism into account.

19: rosalina

she brought weird space ice cream and i felt my mind expanding as i ate it. love her.

18: mr game and watch

he feels like everyone’s dad! and he’s one of those cooks who cooks in front of everyone. dude flung his meals onto everyone’s plates expertly. love him.

17: joker

originally much lower on this list, joker showed up at my house and attempted to make a grilled cheese and made the worst thing i’ve ever taste. then he said something about gru from despicable me and stood in the corner for an hour. originally i had him towards the bottom but then he doordashed five gigantic burgers, ate all of them in one sitting, and then made me an expensive curry that tasted fantastic. dude went hard.

it was at this point i realized i made a mistake with the numbers. like hell if i’m going to fix the whole thing.

22: zelda

she made some weird food but damn was it pretty to look at! crystals, magic power, i mean good vibes all around here.

21-20: pyra and mythra

i feel like i should put them here since they’re confirmed to be good cooks in the game. but between you and me, i didn’t invite them. i’d consider some entries before this to be better cooks but at this point i’ve been working on this list for 8 hours i do not wanna go back and fix things please i mean this whole list is a joke no one should take this seriously

19: banjo and kazooie

these guys can fucking cook. they’ve been living on their own for a while so it makes sense but it still surprises me. they made a really big stew and even brought free puzzle games.

18: wolf

GRILL MASTER. dude knows what he’s doing on that thing. i’ve never seen better spatula work. holy shit.

17: kirby

kirby came in with some weird blonde hair and made some FANTASTIC ribs (that i didn’t have bc i’m pescatarian). weirdly, gordon ramsey went missing the same day…. i’m sure it means nothing.

16: mario

dude made some absolutely spectacular spaghetti. but he kept talking about how great he is and it really off put some people. kinda weird dude.

15: dr mario. dude brought 50 apples to the potluck. guess he doesn’t wanna see anyone in the office. and he didn’t because we ate them all. take that.

14: min min

she brought some soup dumplings which a lot of people hadn’t had! love her. literally fantastic. she had a whole arm for cooking. that’s what we call efficient.

13: ken

he’s kenough. he is amazing at barbecue. he can cook things with his hands, juggle, also he’s just a fun presence. (i made him make fake meat burgers for me)

12: jigglypuff

she showed up with so many pastries. like so many. not only that, but they were decorative!! she put so much work into that. love her.

11: luigi

he tried to make spaghetti like his brother but a literal fucking meteor slammed into his pot and cracked it. tough luck. then he offered to pay and i refused, but went out and got me some really expensive spaghetti anyways! he’s such a nice guy!! shouldn’t be this high… but i love this guy so much. he’s trying his hardest and i respect that.

10: toon link

toon link didn’t actually make anything. but his mom came and made everyone a salad. and honestly! his mom is some great company. she had so many interesting stories about his childhood. honestly she added so much to the function

9: terry

he is the BARBECUE MASTER!!!! literally what the hell how is he so good! everyone at the party kinda stereotyped him but he’s really really progressive with his views which you wouldn’t think for a big barbecue muscle guy in a baseball cap but everyone loved this guy.

8: mega man

the MASTER CHEF!! literally. he was on master chef. he uses thin round blades to slice vegetables, heats things perfectly, has an instance knowledge of spices, just damn. this guy knows what he’s doing.

7-6: bowser and donkey kong

common misconception: everyone thinks these two would have no idea how to cook. but these are FAMILY GUYS HERE!! they’re providing for absolutely gigantic families, these fuckers know how to make a sandwich and they did. initially they started off making separate sandwiches but they have a really similar recipe and decided to work together. and i really respect that. also turns out peach is just bowser’s kids’ babysitter.

5: palutena.

everyone expected her to show up with some absolutely mystical food. naturally, she showed up with the literal ambrosia of the gods. holy shit. unfortunately, she didn’t put as much effort into it as she could’ve.

4: sephiroth.

ok this guy didn’t really cook anything amazing. but his sheer fucking commitment to the vibe is literally legendary. this man has a long as sword he cut 10 veggies at a time with. he heat them with magic world ending fire. when he was done in the kitchen he surrounded himself with fire and gazed menacingly at me. his sheer commitment to the edge lord aesthetic is truly exemplary.

3: incineroar.

THE GRILLING GOAT!! this man is a grill master. he was prepared to grill ANYTHING. and i mean anything. fish, veggies, meat, fucking grilled cheese. love this guy.

2: wii fit trainer

she made the most well balanced and healthy salad i’ve ever had. and she made it taste extraordinary. she can be a little intense about fitness but i’ve never had a healthier meal in my life. it immediately lowered my extremely high cholesterol.

1. diddy kong

he’s about ten. he made you a pb&j. he had homework to do, but he made you a pb&j. he didn’t have to. he wasn’t asked to. he just wanted to make you a pb&j. he could’ve done anything else but he made you a pb&j. what heartless monster wouldn’t accept it.

[polwigle]

almost certainly not the example OP had in mind, but

this is the blorbo.

this is the blorbo on Marketing™.

Personal peeve but cannot handle seeing the blorbo drawn in a """more attractive way""" and its cause the artist doesn't fucking get it, the "flaws" were always the best fucking part

I wanna take them by the shoulders and shake them like you didn't "make them sexier" you fucking neutered their vibes

[onestepbackwards]

(Self-aware PLA) Imagine if the player manages to get transported into the game and due to not being made of code is just ungodly strong when in the game, like able to fight a pokemon bare-handed kinda strong.

Now imagine they somehow get transported by complete accident and are just out in the wilderness and decide to just become the local cryptid for funsies. Made a costume out of whatever they could get and everything.

So now people think this pokemon that is immune to pokeballs and as strong if not stronger than the nobles is just roaming around Hisui, on the prowl for its next target (meanwhile they're just gushing over a wurmple they found and petting it)

You honestly thought you'd be nothing but chopped liver if you ever ended up in the Pokemon universe.

It wasn't hard to guess why. Humans in the pokemon world constantly not only had a lot of disasters due to pokemon and legendaries-

But even regular day people dealt with injuries from pokemon, as if it were simply a small cut from an irritated cat.

If you owned an electric type pokemon, it was natural to assume you'd at best be accidentally shocked at some point. Shocks normal humans in your world wouldn't survive most likely.

So you thought.

Waking up in Legends Arceus was... more than just a surprise. You had wondered if you hit your head, or had something slipped in your food before you went to bed the night before.

Of course, you feared for your life at first.

You had no Arcphone or map. Or any of your own pokemon.

If it wasn't for the fact you were looking at living breathing pokemon in the distance, you would have thought you'd been kidnapped and dropped in the wilderness somewhere.

So when you had tried to maneuver through the wilds in an attempt to find some sort of land marks, (which was awful, by the way. How the hell were you going to find landmarks when things looked so different from a new perspective?), it was inevitable you would be spotted.

By a Golduck no less. One that seemed especially dead set on beating the rocks out of you.

It had chased you, a lot more vigorously than in game, before you were cornered.

You thought you were a goner, or at least going to get quite the beating.

But you weren't going to go down without a fight, at least. Even if you were terrified.

So when you threw a terrified punch-

...You weren't expecting the poor Golduck to flying like Team Rocket blasting off.

You had looked at your fists in slight horrified wonder, wondering if it was a fluke of some sort.

However, it quickly became clear when another aggressive pokemon had tried to attack you, that your strength was no joke.

You defended yourself, and low and behold, the other pokemon went flying. Any other pokemon in the area immediately backed off, giving you space.

Though when you gently said hello to a Pichu, and carefully gave the curious pokemon a pet, many pokemon seemed to relax.

The aggressive pokemon though, definitely still gave you a wide berth, and it then hit you.

They were treating you like you were on top of the food chain, being able to square up with them almost like-

It hit you in that moment.

Were they treating you like some sorta Alpha?

You thought for a moment about what this meant, and considered your options.

Given that you had no idea where you were, and how to contact anyone, you decided you'd roll with the punches. Even if that meant doing so literally.

...Which is how you accidentally ended up scaring the first human you saw.

By that point, it had already been a few days.

Despite your sudden climb up the food chain, pokemon for the most part were very friendly to you. Many were willing to help you out.

Some had given you berries and other fruits and veggies they scavenged. Others had helped find you some clothe, which you were... concerned where they had gotten it from.

But you wouldn't turn down clothes or blankets.

That being said, perhaps you should have realized being wrapped in a blanket in the cold at night, surrounded by some Alpha pokemon would have caused a stir by the first human that actually found you.

The poor merchant took off screaming when you spotted him and tried approaching. He was gone before you could even ask him to wait.

You had been confused, and wondered if it was all the wild pokemon near you that spooked him. No doubt he thought some of the alpha pokemon would attack?

It upset you a little bit, but you understood. There goes another human to talk to and get some directions from.

But that did mean you'd have to adjust your approach going forward if you saw another human.

Which of course, also didn't go well.

You came across a camp, and tried to approach-

...Only for everyone to run screaming as they ran from the 'creature' leading a gang of very large pokemon behind them.

After that, you decided perhaps you wouldn't be in contact with any humans any time soon. Not if you kept being found or finding humans at times you were surrounded by other pokemon.

Which was always.

And you had forgotten that people in this era were very wary of pokemon compared to other games. You figured if you were even surrounded by smaller pokemon, you'd still see fear.

It was not long after that you ended up adopting the 'cryptid' persona.

Nearly any time you came across someone, they never got a real good look at you, and ended up running away, usually screaming.

But hey, you weren't hurting anyone. Plus it was kinda funny to think about how you were some mysterious 'human' or 'creature' that gave people the spooks.

May as well find some humor in it, despite how lonely you were.

Of course, you unknowingly end up causing some discord in the local settlements. Word spreads of the odd creature that is often spotted with different pokemon, especially alpha pokemon.

And the pokemon seem to follow them, like they are a leader of some sort.

Was it a new pokemon? A humanoid lookin' one?

Was it strong enough to wrangle even alphas?

Was it dangerous? Did it hunt humans?

Did the creature only come out at night?

Meanwhile, you are playing peekaboo with an Eevee, blissfully unaware of the conflict people have about your existence.

Questions about your presence spread like wildfire as people pondered who you were. Or what you were.

Maybe you weren't even a pokemon at all, but some sort of spirit or god?

Others, a smaller few, suggested maybe you were just a hermit. (Unknowingly, they were sorta right...)

Some wondered if you were even real, and not some sort of prank going outside a circle of friends.

However, the sightings continue, even in different regions. A cloaked figure followed by all sorts of pokemon, regular and alphas.

Some even wondered if you were an omen of death, or a warning. Showing up to weary travelers when danger was near, instilling fear into them so they would leave the area, and therefore, the danger.

In reality, you were simply exploring. It was interesting how the world connected outside the hub area of the game. You could actually see how regions connected now!

Plus, you were trying to map out everything in an attempt to maybe find a settlement at some point. At this point though, it wasn't as high of a priority as you settled into your new life.

It's not until you end up helping a young woman, a teenager you think, who was lost, that people wonder if the deity or omen theory is true.

What really happened is you found a young teen clearly lost and scared.

You approached them, careful to avoid scaring her. You gave her some of your fruit you had kept on you, and asked a Blissey to help heal her.

All while she stared in shock, unable to get a good look at you with how dark it was.

It was near pitch black, except for the glow from Cyndaquil that was next to you for some light to see where you were walking. The flames from the little guy's tail eerily lit up your cloak, but hid your face.

You point her in the direction you think is a camp, without saying much, and she nearly stumbles away as she takes off, occasionally looking at you behind her shoulder.

...The rumors of you being a deity of protection skyrocket after that. Oops.

At least you were having fun with it!

[adobe-outdesign]

No subtly no nuance we're answering this debate now (note: each option includes any alternate forms for that Pokemon)