#Baby is still a spring chicken only gonna be 5

[reraimu]

my cats in various hats 👒

[lettersfromcitizenjoan]

Joaning and my Current State of Affairs Spring 2024: Healing

So, I feel like it��s time for another entry on my state of affairs. Maybe I’ll make this a yearly thing like the president's state of the union address or seasonal. I love all the seasons. Since I wrote my last state of affairs a lot has changed. Not externally but internally. So yeah, nothing much has changed on the outside of my life. I still live in SP for some reason on the same block I was born on with my two aunts and my mom across the street, I’ve still have never had a hot blonde blue eyed boyfriend or a best human friend. Obviously I’m mentioning these things because I hope these things change one day. I did however get braces so I have straight teeth now. I guess that’s a pretty big thing. The braces made my face has change a little. I know because my iPhone wouldn’t recognize me & I had to rescan my face for for Face ID. I still think I look the same when I look in the mirror but I’ve looked at some of my older photos and can see the subtle difference in my face. I’ve recently started working out 5-6 days a week, I had a pelvis injury for two weeks but I’m all patched up and am working out again. I eat vegan or vegetarian except on certain Fridays. I’ve realized chicken especially fried chicken makes me nuts and makes me feel out of control of my emotions. So I don’t eat chicken anymore. I'll eat still eat in-n-out when on the west coast or organic steak, medium well of course. I got a some new outfits, I have a a black and white electric fireplace in my room now, a beautiful display of pink orchids. I laid some faux grass in the garden and bought a few palm trees. There is the recent presence of one grey hair that I refuse to pluck. I call it my strand of wisdom (get it strand, like in strand of hair). My new celebrity crush is Matthias Schweighofer he’s 43! I’ve never had a crush on a 43 year old before. So yeah not a lot much has changed externally yet but internally I must admit I feel like a newborn baby. All the self help book therapy and work I’ve done has finally paid off. I’ve been alive for 31 years and I’ve spent the last 30 being suicidal and asking God to die everyday. Now I don’t do that. I actually thank Jehovah for waking me up in the morning now, I savor every moment of life for the gift that it is, when its really awesome and even when it’s not so fun. My current pursuit is to make every waking moment of my life as peaceful and fun as possible and keep people who don’t truly love me and have my best interests at heart out of my life. It all started when I was having one of my hurricane days. It thankfully doesn’t happen these days but I still remember how it used to feel. One second I would be “awesome everything gonna’s work out life’s pretty cool” Joan. Then someone would say or do something that I didn’t agree with and I would perceive as an injustice and these dark clouds would start to enter my mind. That’s the only way I can describe it. It would usually be accompanied by tears and that would last for the whole day until I went to sleep. Once I start crying I can’t stop. These days that doesn’t happen anymore since I’ve done the work. Anyway on this particular hurricane day I was home alone and held a knife to my throat and started crying "Dear God give me one reason why I shouldn’t just kill myself right now." The pain body is what Eckhart Tolle calls it, was very present in me my whole life. Now it's gone...healed. I just sat on my bed praying to Jehovah “I just want to be happy, please show me how I can be happy, I can’t take feeling like this everyday.” I was broken. The summer of 2022 I cried every day for 7 days straight and had a mental breakdown. Now I wake up smiling most days. I know this may be hard to believe. Some days I don’t even recognize myself. Sometimes I catch myself just smiling for no reason. I look at the mirror and ask "Who is this woman staring back at me? Since when do I react that way to things & say things like that & walk away like that & don’t care like that? See, Newborn Joan. I’ve buried a version of myself and am relearning...how to live.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL

April 2021 Part 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Second Chance Ep 1 - living up to its name since it looks to be a series of redemption arcs. Launched with a college confession and a broken friendship, then a flash back to them as seniors in high school. Pairings include friends to lovers, nerd/jock, and maybe cafe boss/employee. There’s a lot going on, but it’s still... quiet and sweet. The script is pretty pat but it’s still WAY more watchable than Cupid Coach or Brothers and most of the acting is solid. Ep 1 tropes included: he’s in engineering, wound tending, fast & bicurious. This could turn into what I wanted My Gear & Your Gown to be. Fingers crossed. 

Love Poison 2 Ep 1 & 2 turns out I did watch and report on season 1 (8 eps), season 2 seems equally unmemorable. Thai countryside setting, strong dialect, incomprehensible plot, camp side characters, and ghastly singing. 

Y-Destiny Ep 1 (eng subs?) - opened with the sports romance enemies to lovers (they aren’t going in the teaser order). When the couple got over fighting, the flirting was v cute, but the flipping SPONGE BATH trope had to rear its ugly head. Still, this series is shaping up to be less coy and more frank than most BL, better than expected. It feels, I don’t know, gay-er or something?  *** Sources were correct that each couple is getting (at least) 2 eps, and MDL has been updated to say this is a 15 episode series (not 7). 

Cupid Coach 12 fin - The new Nite was great and should have been a main all along. It felt like we got a tiny nugget of what could have been in about 10 minutes worth of this last ep. It was way too slow with terrible editing and a criminally bad script, but at least it ended happy. Mostly, like Friend Forever, I’m just disappointed that these two actors were done dirty by the series. Bad Cupid Coach, no screen caps for you. 

Lovely Writer Ep 6 - breaking news, there’s a het couple I like: toppy bi femme + soft boi = such a good pairing! I know, but this NEVER happens. Meanwhile, Sib’s secret is out, Gene is a bit of a drama queen, and the plot thickens. We half way through.  

Brothers Ep 9 - Kaow had a serious moment of advice giving that was truly lovely. Lots of family dama made this a superior episode to... well... any of the others in this series. Which isn’t saying much. 

1000 Stars Ep 10 fin - at the start this series didn’t grab me the way GMMTV’s last BL, Tonhon Chonlatee, did. But boy did it end 1000x better. Might have given us 2021′s best forehead kiss. I enjoyed the ultra romantic cliff-top reunion kiss, and I LOVED the stinger flirting scene. That was an absolute gift we had no right to expect. This drama is a poster child for finishing on a high note (always focus on that dessert course). Final thoughts? This was FAR more a classic romance than it was BL. There were some BL tropes used but not many and most of them originated in the romance genre not yaoi. A picture perfect ending bumped 1000 Stars much higher up my best-of list than expected. Not sure how often I’ll rewatch it as a whole, but this last episode? I’m probably rewatching it right now. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Dear Uranus (Taiwan GL) Ep 3 fin - I guess that’s it? Okaaaaay  

HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 3 (AKA Ep 5-6) - we got actual legit gay culture not just BL (always appreciated) from XingSi. I’m starting to find LiCheng’s “show them we fucking” hijinks hilarious rather than annoying (not sure why, maybe I just love a rubber chicken, or maybe it was the STUFFED CORN WITH THE TASSEL that did it). 

-- H4 Moment of RANT --

Tropes included beach trip, there’s only one bed, cook for him, baby is a floppy drunk, carry baby to bed, and.... drunk non-con. Whoopdedoo. Here we go again. Did TharnType teach us NOTHING? (Apparently it taught us if the chemistry is good enough, I have no morals at all.) At least H4 seems to be taking us out of cheese into serious when it comes to assault. Or is it? 

I take back what I said last week about XingSi & YongJie being codependency + salvation trope, that only works if YongJie is the uke. He’s NOT. So we got us an obsessive predatory villain with a possible redemption arc. That’s more common in crime dramas, mafia romance, and epic fantasy than BL. It’s real hard to redeem a sexual predator in a reality-grounded universe like contemporary romance (See Kla in LBC1&2). 

Next week is gonna be a test of the whole damn franchise. Imma remind both me a you that this was ep 3 of 10 so we got a ways to go yet... but ooof, what have we wrought, BL? (I ended up doing a whole post about the stepbrother trope because of this sub plot.) Taiwan is killing me.

-- RANT ended --

Word of Honor (China) Ep 19-21 - over half way point so we got ALL the back story (in a classic 4 act story structure midway reveal). Now we know who WKX really is and his lineage. We also got some cute hugs and hand holds. Moving along at a nice clip despite being 36 eps total. Still gayest thing to come out of we-not-gay China since Advance Bravely. 

Most Peaceful Place (Vietnam) Ep 2 - takes them a while to get eng subs together and ep 2 didn’t drop until late. So I’m putting this in a Thurs time slot going forward. Miscommunication already cleared up and a 2nd couple has been introduced. The pacing on these Vietnamese BLs is always a bit... off. But it’s still better than most of its ilk, enjoyable. I’m thinking it’s a 6 ep arc. 

We Best Love 2 (Taiwan) Ep 5 - after the initial drama DRAMA of ep 2, the current external crisis at work is much quieter, giving this whole season a top heavy feel. Taken along side the first season, I think it’s fitting nicely into a 4 act structure, but that might be my bias. I hope I’m not wrong, we’ll find out next week. Shi De puttering about being domestic with Shu Yi on his back was the best execution of the piggyback trope EVER. Meanwhile, our little D/s side couple of codependency, salvation trope + mental illness is becoming weirdly appealing. I don’t know. H4 done mess with my head. 

Stand Alones 

Absolute BL AKA Zettai BL ni Naru Sekai vs Zettai BL ni Naritakunai Otoko  (Japan) Ep 1-4 mini series. Found subs under A Man Who Defies The World of BL. IT’S HILARIOUS. It’s Japan making fun of us, but also itself for having started this whole BL nonsense - from yaoi roots to present day. It’s parody goddamn gold. Utterly cheeky unto the very last line. We are not worthy. 

Apparently the most powerful tropes of all time are: baby is a floppy drunk and the piggyback fo nobility. Oh and chocolate. {Full review here.} 

Honestly, this show may have been made with only @heretherebedork and I in mind. I don’t know if you’d even understand half of it if you don’t have a history with the manga source genre and an obsessive interest in underlying narrative devices. I haven’t seen much chatter in the blog’o’sphere on this one because, in the end, it’s not a romance at all, it’s social commentary. 

The ending line was a masterclass in lampooning a genre. I’m going to rewatch the whole thing just to catch all the digs I missed first time around. It is a thing of beauty and a joy forever. 

Thank you Japan. I forgive you all your hair-styling sins of the last decade. 

Breaking News 

Spring Line Up:

Scholar Ryu’s Wedding Ceremony AKA Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korean historical BL) April 15th 

Close Friend the series (Thai trailer) April 22. 

2gether the movie (Thai trailer) April 22 to Thai theaters.

Nitiman (Thai) May 7 on One31.

I Told Sunset About You 2 (Thai) May 27 on LineTV

Ossan’s Love (Hong Kong) June to Viu 

Gossip 

Bad Buddies released its first promo op via Arm Share, which means GMMTV is at least *thinking* about filming it. 

Fun behind the scenes gossip sesh with eng subs for Tell the World I Love You (that Perth Bas movie we are maybe getting someday but will likely be sad). 

New Thai BL Bite Me (adapted from novel Grab a Bite) dropped a teaser. It stars Mark Siwat (Kla in LBC) as uke character Ake, a delivery boy with special foodie powers, and chef Eua (seme played by Zung Kidakorn) who discovers him. It’s from the same author as Manner of Death so we might even get some actual plot. Since it’s an established BL actor who I happen LOVE, a known author, and a plot about FOOD, I could not me more excited for this one. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Some shows may be listed a day later than actual air date for accessibility reasons. Some are dropping multiples at a time but just started so I’m not sure on numbering. 

Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.

Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.

[soldrawss]

Does Big Bro!Mikey AU have an april or no? I think it would be nice for Mikey to have a bff april!!

April is a part of this au, yes! She started out as just a classmate of Mikey’s, they had the same homeroom in high school before Mikey dropped out the summer before his Junior year. They hadn’t really kept in contact, mostly because she only knew him by proxy (Mikey was nice and friendly to everyone, April of course included, but they didn’t have much in common, and their main friend groups were different, so they didn’t hang out much) and when Mikey all but disappeared without an explanation, she kinda just figured he moved or something, and left it at that, not giving him any thought for the next three years.

That is, until she meets him again, in the halls of Hunter College, looking like he was gonna collapse at any minute, which he kinda does, into an empty bench at the schools outside cafe and lounge area. April waffles for a few seconds, because ‘holy shit is that Mike Hamato?’ before biting the bullet and making her way over to say, “Hey, Michael right? Hi, it’s been a while. It’s April, we had homeroom together freshman and sophomore year. I haven’t seen you since Savanti Romero’s pool party. How are you?” And his smile is a slow, automatic thing at first, more out of common politeness than anything else, but then it grows into something much more genuine and glacier melting when he responds back, “April, hey, yeah, hi! Wow, has it really been that long? Man, it seems like just yesterday you were fishing Mondo and me out of the pool after one too many chicken fights. It’s good to see you!”

And catching up seemed so easy, April was almost surprised they hadn’t been better friends in high school. Though, she suspected that was mostly due to Mikey’s incredibly easy charm and naturally inviting warmth. (Dude could make friends with just about anyone)

He was a little different than how she remembered, a little more weather-worn and tired, a kinda weariness that hung off his shoulders like heavyweights. But there was still a bright shine to those penny-colored eyes, and when he smiled, it was with all the dimples and joy that she remembers so clearly from when she was 15. Holding back a laugh at the Hamato kid that was preforming springing handstands across the cafeteria just to draw attention away from the impending fight between two of their more hotheaded classmates and ease the tension out of the air in a ridiculous but effective manner.

She doesn’t ask why he left high school, it doesn’t really occur to her to ask, but after 2 hours of talking (April not even realizing she was missing her history class because she was so caught up in their catching up) he offers the information anyway.

His dad died. When he was barely 16, and he was left alone with 3 baby brothers and no other family that could help take care of them, and oh my god, he just dropped out of school to get his GED like it was the most common thing in the world and he went to work, what, 2, sometimes 3 jobs just to make enough money to support them all and April didn’t mean for tears to start pooling up because that so wasn’t fair to Mikey at all, if anyone should be crying, it should be him, but Mikey just looks a little shy and bashful about it all. “It was hard, but we got through it. And hey, now I’m working at like, this really prestigious Italian restaurant, super classy and everything! And they pay me more than I’m probably worth, but I’ll get my culinary degree in like a year, and then after that, a lot of things will change,” He says like everything in the world is just that easy, handing April a few tissues from his book bag and giving her one of those genuine, if not a little crooked, smiles of his.

Mikey promises to have lunch with her again (because April absolutely refuses to let this dandelion haired lunatic walk away from her life a second time and practically demands that they hang out again) since they both have the same free time before their respective classes at the college, and makes a show of saving her number with probably a few too many emojis as a contact name just to make her smile.

And what turned into a promise for another lunch date turned into almost a daily routine, them having lunch together on the bench, talking about classes and teachers and jobs and April’s problematic little kitten she affectionately named Mayhem and Mikey’s little brothers who are probably equally as problematic but he doesn’t have a say in what their names are, and things are fun and casual between Hamato and her.

That is, until two months later, when April gets a call from Mikey at 5pm on a Saturday.

“Donnie’s sick,” Mikey says almost breathlessly, and even without the context, April was already springing to her feet just at the sheer tension and concern in Mikey’s voice, like a taught wire about to snap. “I can’t get off work for another few hours, but I don’t want to leave him by himself with a fever. And I know this is like, putting you on the spot and really awkward and you can totally say no if you want to, but I don’t know who else to call and,-”

“Mike, it’s ok. Breathe hun,” April is saying, not unkindly pushing Mayhem off her lap and reaching for her backpack off the floor in her dorm room, stuffing a few random things in it before grabbing her jacket and her car keys off the counter. “Text me your address. I’ll be over there in 5 minutes tops.”

And it’s more of a promise than a fact, because his building is technically 20 minutes away from hers, but April makes it in 10 just by spite alone (and maybe driving a little recklessly downtown) and knocks on the door of the little apartment on the 6th floor, unit 404.

It takes a hesitant second, but then the door lock clicks open and April is greeted by warm brown eyes and a freckled face that reminds April so much of Mikey that it takes her almost a full 10 seconds before she introduces herself with an automatic smile. “Hi sweetheart, I’m April. I’m a friend of your older brother Mikey.”

Raphael, if April remembered Mikey’s brothers correctly, didn’t really need much convincing to let April in after she mentioned he was a friend of Mikey's, and doesn’t hesitate to pull her into their little apartment, leading her to the bedroom that the twins share with a small but tight little fist around hers.

“Mikey called and said you were coming. Leo’s atah sleepover, but Donnie’s in here. His head’s still hot and his voice is all scratchy, even though I made sure that he took the medicine Mikey left out. And he won’t eat anything I give him,” the 7-year-old reports diligently, much more mature than April had expected from the young child. 

April’s been babysitting since she was 11, and considering how all the neighborhood kids around her block adore her, she likes to think that she’s got a pretty solid Ph.D. in knowing how to take care of a sick pre-teen who wants nothing to do with her. So the heavy-lidded and red-eyed glare that Donatello shoots at her from under his covers is duly noted but otherwise ignored as she gently knocks on the door and slowly follows a much less hesitant Raphael into the bedroom.

It takes a while, a long while, for Donatello, no, Donnie, to warm up to her, but he gets there eventually, with the help of Raphael, Raph, who’s hanging off of Aprils shoulders, having warmed up to her almost immediately simply because ‘any friend of Mikey’s is a friend of ours Dee! Don’t be mean and eat some soup!’

After realizing that Donnie just had a little cold, and was in no real danger even with a fever, Raph seemed to cheer up immensely, and was more than willing to help answer all of April’s questions about what medicine Donnie had taken, any allergies, the last time he ate, and even helped her make some egg drop soup since they didn’t have enough ingredients of chicken noodle, which Donnie put up a fight about, but eventually took after one look of Raph’s puppy dog eyes.

Donnie was out like a light 15 minutes later, after taking some night time cough medicine and April sent a reassuring text to Mikey two hours later when his fever finally broke, to which Mikey replied with an explosion of heart emoji’s that April couldn’t rightly decipher other than he was happy about it.

Mikey got home at 11 that night, and April had to flag him down quietly from where she sat trapped under a sleeping, pj clad Raph on the couch; a Jupiter Jim movie marathon playing on the tv. 

“Thank you so much, April,” Mikey said to her in the kitchen 20 minutes later, handing her a cup of hot tea. He had efficiently plucked Raph off of April’s lap like a pro with years of experience, putting him into his own bed before checking on a still sleeping Donnie, whose face was no longer a burnt red from his fever earlier. “I don’t know what I would have done without you. I don’t get my paycheck till next week, so I can’t really pay you right now, but I brought home some chocolate mousse cake from my work that you can have until I can-” “You didn’t tell me you worked at Huesso’s!” April didn’t shout, because there were two kids sleeping down the hallway, as she grabbed the bag Mikey had offered to her. “Dude, their deserts are like, crazy good! I love their cheesecake, but they’re stupid expensive and you have to get a reservation like, 4 months in advance to get in.” And April uses the change in topics as a distraction because there was no way she’d let Mikey try to pay her for helping out, she didn’t even want that to be an option. April didn’t do this for the money. She wanted to help out Mikey out. She liked Mikey. She thought he was funny and charming and had a heart big enough to cradle the entire world if he was as big as all the love he has. And she adored being around his baby brothers.

April grins at Mikey when she opens the box, and slides her finger over the glossy frosting of the cake and licks her fingers of the chocolatey goodness before she says, “Listen, if I could convince you to bring me home deserts from this place, then I’ll hang out with the boys anytime you want me too. You have my number, literally call me anytime, for any reason, and I’m here.”

[shark-el]

Onion soup:

A firend of mine asked me for my Onion soup recipe. I was just gana send it to her plain simple and boring. But then I thought of a better way to waist my time that I should probably be spending doing work or researching for projects and thing. But I decided this was a lot more fun!

My idea was to be one of those annoying food blogs that tell their whole life story in an absolutely overly exaggerated fashion! One to make fun of blogs that do this, and tow because it's fun and why the hell not?!

So the idea for this started back when I was first starting out cooking and every single blog I found had a 1000 word essay about the origin of sed food. I found it extremely irritating because why do I did to know that this person's great uncle's best friends grandma's dog died in a fire in order to make this recipe?! So I would scroll down all the way to get to the actual recipe but the story just kept on going! Like about how her great great great grandfather's colleague from work had spills tea on his novel, a passion project that he had worked so hard for. I still had no idea how this was relevant at all to the spring rolls I was planning on making? And after an eternity of scrolling fingers tired and eyes full of tears I finally got to the recipe.

You'd think after all that back story and the amount I had learned about the person writing this like the fact that her great grandmother's favorite color was tangerine but specifically tangerine, and not orange because her childhood best friend had lent her a sweater that exact color and the next day she had never returned. That sweater has become a family heirloom that has been passed down ever since. Or the fact that she had avocado toast on Tuesday three years ago on may 18th at exactly 3:26 pm. Needless to say I knew a lot about this person and their family tree. It really helped me get the care and feeling I needed for my spring rolls. So that is why I'm going to be overly pretentious and do the same thing to you so have fun.

I was born at a very young age, in the evening on a hot August day. I don't remember much from this time in my life but my parents told me that I was miserable until I could do things for myself. After that I was a force to be reckoned with, nothing could stop me! There was one time when I was about 6 months old my parents had left me on the table thinking I couldn't get far, keeping an eye on me every once in a while but not paying much attention. The second I was put down I saw something gleaming in the corner of my eye, it was a delicious looking chocolate brownie. Nothing could stop me I was going to get that brownie no matter what! so I slowly started scooching my tiny baby body to the delicious looking dessert moving as fast as my little arms could take me. It had been 10 minutes of struggling from one end of the table to the other. I had finally made it! I was so close my hand was mere centimeters away from the prize. It was gonna be mine all mine! But then suddenly out of nowhere my dad's arms came and picked me up taking me away from my long awaited dessert. needless to say I was furious but I still never got that specific brownie (I've had other brownies don't get me wrong, it's just I never had that one. And at this point I don't think I'd want to since it's several years past it's expansion date).

That was my first experience with real food which might have been a core memory if I actually remembered it. Sadly this happened before i could remember it, but i'd like to think that it was the beginning of my love for food.

Over the years I started cooking it started off as learning how to make eggs and mac and cheese but then over the years I started to make more complex dishes, some worked and some didn't. Now I know that most people would rather be informed about the times that somebody failed rather than the time someone succeeded, they stand out more I guess and if you're actually sitting down to read this then I will reward you with some of my biggest cooking fails.

First off anything that involves baking, for instance there was one time I was going to bake a chocolate cake for a bake sale and well... so what happened was, I learned that I can't follow a recipe for the life of me! You may ask why I'm writing this recipe if I probably won't follow it anyway, but it's more a list of ingredients than a actual recipe. Anyway back to the story so my first mistake was I ended up putting in a tablespoon of salt instead of a teaspoon so normally this would be fine it would have just been a little bit salty, but problem was I had another mistake, I ended up putting in a tablespoon of mint extract instead of a teaspoon of vanilla extract as well, so the resulting cake was less cake tasting and more of the toothpaste variety. ( For some reason my brother loved it. He took about a handfuls. I would not recommend it with a glass of orange juice).

Another baking story, I was trying to make chicken pot pie, and filling itself is cooking. I can do that, throwing things in a pot, easy! It works! But do not, I repeat do not! leave me alone with a pie crust. my dad and I frantically tried to roll out said pie crust and not rip it, we were flailing around confused as to how dough worked. It took us about half an hour to roll out the pie crust so it would rip adds little as possible. After that day we came to a conclusion never to leave us with the job of baking ever again!

The next cooking fail I have is finally about the soup recipe. You see the first time I tried making onion soup it didn't go very well... Let me explain what happened. I was really in the mood for a nice warm onion soup and I figured you just throw some onions in a pot with some white wine and water and let it sit. Problem was we didn't have any wine, and I was too young to go to the grocery store to buy some, so instead I decided to use grape juice. Never but I mean never cook an absurd amount of grape juice, the heated aroma smelt excruciatingly unappetizing and I would not recommend it on anyone. So the resulting soup was watered down hot grape juice and stir-fried onions. needless to say it did not taste good and smelled even worse. I told myself that would be the last time I'd ever make onion soup! Years have past and and I was really in the mood for onion soup again even after that disaster, so I decided to try once again. this time with no grape juice! I looked through multiple recipes some had more ingredients than others and ended up combining a lot of them together to make my own onion soup recipe the one you see before you. And though I was scared that I'd mess it up I decided that I just really wanted some onion soup so I made it and it turned out delicious. Look at that a happy ending isn't that just great?!

I'd be surprised if you actually read through all of this if you did a good job,if you didn't then you're probably not going to read this sentence but I don't blame you it's all good who actually reads these backstories to recipes anyway?

Anyway I think I've mumbled on long enough here is the actual recipe for this soup:

5-6 onions

7-8 cups of chicken/ onion stock ( cold be parve from show mixes)

3 cloves of garlic (probably more)

1/4 cups of soy sauce

1/3 cups of white wine (optional)

4 tablespoons of oil (2-3 at the beginning and then 1-2 in middle of caramelization)

4 tablespoons of flower

1 teaspoon sugar (helps with caramelization)

Salt (to taste)

Pepper ( to taste but approx 1/8-1/4 of a teaspoon)

Instructions:

1) caramelize onions:

On medium heat Cook the onions, stirring often, until they have softened, about 15 to 20 minutes.

Increase the heat to medium high. Add the remaining tablespoon of oil (or butter depending on) and cook, stirring often, until the onions start to brown, about 15 more minutes.

Then sprinkle with sugar (to help with the caramelization) and 1 teaspoon of salt and continue to cook until the onions are well browned, about 10 to 15 more minutes.

Add garlic

2) Add Flour until mixed and quickly ( so it doesn't burn) add Add wine and soy sauce and once mixed well and incorporated

3)Add stock slowly, then add bay leaves and black pepper and salt (if needed, you can always add it later).

Bring to a summer and leve on low heat for 30 mins.

And now you officially scrolled too far, this is the point in a recipe blog where they add a bunch of links to all the recipes made by their friends families and anything else that comes to mind. Most people looking for the recipe would scroll all the way to the end trying to find it in this mess of words and unnecessary backstory told in an excruciatingly painful amount of detail. Then realize they've scrolled too far, sigh and start scrolling up again, this time a little slower.

It normally also has recommendations of foods that would go well with it, in the case of this onion soup I would recommend eating it with some garlic bread or grilled cheese sandwiches, basically all comfort foods that would spark Joy anytime you eat them.

If you're looking for aesthetic you can try making a bread bowl, cover it with cheese and broil it, which would have a whole other recipe linked in somewhere, with more details about how their great uncle's best firends associate made this same recipe for the pince of some country. But as I mentioned beforehand, I for one am not a baker and bread is most definitely a baking job. Not only is bread one of the more complex foods to bake, even if you put every ingredient precisely as the recipe mentions them, it still won't turn out right! Because ether the atmospheric pressure has changed very slightly, or the wind isn't blowing in the correct direction. Bread making is hard and I have a lot of respect for people who can do it correctly.

If you've read through all of this, damn that's dedication thank you and I applaud thee. I hope you enjoyed, and were amused.

[nefoe-dd]

Pass the happy! 🌻 When you receive this, list five things that make you happy and send this to 10 of the last people in your notifications. 💛💛💛

(Pls ignore the fact that you sent this to me 3 weeks ago)

1. Music!

I listen to a variety of genres, I have like 15 Spotify playlists all with different vibes cause I have to have some consistency lol. Here's a playlist of the upbeat music I listen to when I'm in a good mood (and when I'm in a bad one that I want to get better). It's mostly k/j-pop because I listen(ed) to a lot of that when I was making it.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7rAHFA7abYqVLy9ympi6jF?si=4fe993dd8e6b4695

And here's one for one of my OCs, same deal, I’m a nerd okay

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1hMumtguoQ9rANafkGyXVG?si=e5e7d503a3bc4856

2. Minecraft

I play MC like.....every day. That isn’t always the case cause I have other obligations of course, but its really great. I’m in a modded Roleplay SMP server that’s been going on for a few months now, we chat in discord regularly even when we’re busy, its chill. Also joined a realm earlier this week with some other online friends, its been doing well so far, got some diamond armor finally, gonna build some stuff once we’ve all grinded a bit more. The RP server is in 1.16, and the realm is in 1.17 so I basically just pick which one I play on based on whichever version I feel like using/what materials I wanna use in builds :thumbs up: 

3. Hermitcraft/Empires

I’m putting them together because they are both related to the previous one, and are both currently ongoing. I love both the content and personalities of everyone involved with the two, as well the communities surrounding them on here. I’m still working through more Empires videos for the povs I want to watch (there’s like 4 including the ones I’m up to date on) but it works especially considering they’re doing their own thing for the most part. For HC I’m only watching two, but they’re both unable to upload very much for personal reasons right now, so I’ve been passing the time between current season 8 stuff by watching some of their older content in previous seasons. I may have a bit of a problem. 

4. Cute Animals :)

This is pretty self explanatory but just......yeah. And before you ask, all (well, most) animals are cute, there are very little no exceptions. There’s a few enclosures in the park near my Uni with some farm animals in them, they used to have those fluffy chickens but they weren’t there last year so I think they may have been rehomed. I’m not there rn but I love going for walks there so I have a lot of photos of just them being dorks. I went at night with some friends, apparently peacocks sleep in trees, because they were there, just staring at us when we walked past, kinda scared the shit out of us for a bit. I saw a baby one last week, it was so small.......My fav animal for a while has been Watusi Cattle (I think that’s what they’re called), their horns are big af and I love them, wouldn’t wanna run into one in the wild though.

5. HATSUNE MIKU MY BELOVED!

(admittedly I had a hard time coming up with 5, and she just would not leave my brain)

I love her design and how versatile it is, it is simply impossible to mess up. Even when you completely change her colour palette its just so obviously ‘her’ that I cannot get over it. There’s a really cute chocolatier themed figure that’s being released next month (preorders ended on most sites last month) and....holy shit, look at her design......

There’s a matching plushie and THAT is also adorable. There’s also a cherry blossom design that’s had a lot of versions because they keep releasing new figures every spring or so. Unfortunately high quality figures like that from Japan are like, several hundred dollars, so idk if I’ll ever get my hands on any, but it would be cool. This one from January of this year is my favourite

Fun fact: One time I searched ‘trans miku figure’ and there are SEVERAL WITH THOSE COLOURS ITS AMAZING. What a fucking queen. What more could you ask for honestly

[dailyaudiobible]

03/05/2021 DAB Transcript

Numbers 4:1-5:31, Mark 12:18-37, Psalms 48:1-14, Proverbs 10:26

Today is the 5th day of March welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it is wonderful to be here with you today as we round the corner on another week and head toward home. We've reading from the Amplified Bible this week, which…which is what we’ll continue to do through the end of the week, which is…like, which is officially tomorrow. So, let’s dive in. Numbers chapters 4 and 5 today.

Commentary:

Okay. So, let's talk about the proverb as we conclude our week. I have a habit of a little swig of apple cider vinegar in the morning almost every day and that will wake you up in a hurry. I have also been around campfires where the wind has shifted and blown the smoke directly into my face and into my eyes and I have some challenges in that area and so can quickly become irritated. I'm sure I'm not the only one. According to the voice of wisdom found in the book of Proverbs those are examples for what it is like to have essentially a lazy employee, somebody that you are counting on to accomplish something, but they are lazy, and you send them to do this thing and they end up being like a swig of vinegar or smoke in the eyes. So, just imagine going to your pantry and getting whatever vinegar you have and, yeah, just unscrew the cap and take a nice big swig. What does that set off? It’s a sharp taste. It's…it's irritating. Like it causes us to squint. We might involuntary… involuntary shake our heads back and forth like we bit a lemon or something. It’s not the kind reaction where you go like, “ah, that’s what I needed”, like a bowl of chicken soup when you're not feeling well. It's like the opposite of that or having smoke in your eyes is blowing in your face until your eyes are all red and watering and you’re trying to wash them out and the irritation won’t go away. That's what it's like to have an unconscientiously lazy person doing work for you. So, we should think about this. Certainly, as we just have but we should also think about this in terms of our own lives. What kind of worker are we? Like are we that person who is trying to show up because we have to pay the bills, but we hate the place that we work and so we’re doing everything conceivable to do as little as possible, just enough…just enough to keep us from losing that job or just completely distracted. Our minds are somewhere else almost all the time and we’re not conscientious and we’re not paying attention to the things that we’re getting paid to do. Basically, what needs to be done, needs to be done or it wouldn't have been assigned. And or it needs to be done right or somebody else has to then go behind and do it right, if not, it's…it’s incomplete and it's going to fall apart, whatever it is. So we can see why that would be like a swig of vinegar, smoke in the eyes. Is that who we are? Is that what we do in the name of Jesus every day that we get up and go to the office? If so, then, yeah, then we’re causing this reaction. It may be unspoken but it is being observed. We’re causing this acrid, bitter, pungent reaction. And, so, the deeper truth here with wisdom is that that's not going to go anywhere. That is not a long-term strategy that will get us anywhere in life. And, so, as we move out of our work week today, go through the weekend and prepare for the next shiny sparkly new week maybe this is something to carry around and consider over the next couple of days. Are we causing those kinds of reactions in the places that we work in people that we interact with or are we on the receiving end of that and maybe it's gone on long enough? Maybe it's not going anywhere for anybody. Some things to think about.

Prayer:

Holy Spirit come. Come into those things. No matter what side of the coin we may consider this from it still does invite us forward into doing something about it. Like it’s an untenable situation. And, so, Holy Spirit, come lead us forward that we might reclaim lost time that can then be devoted to Your service in this world. Come Jesus we pray. In Your mighty name, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it's the website, it’s where you find out what's going on around here. I say it every day because its where you find out what’s going on around here. If you’re using the app you can also find out what's going around…on around here by using the app.

So, check out the Community section. That's where the Prayer Wall is, that's where the different links to stay connected on social media are. That's where we are on social media. So, check that out.

Check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop. There are resources in the Shop that have been developed for this journey, whether that be journaling. We have our own journal that we developed over the years. Whether that be all of the writing utensils that are there in the Daily Audio Bible Shop. Whether that be written resources to take the journey deeper on specific topics or the music or just…just check it out. Check out the Daily Audio Bible Shop.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible Shop you can do that dailyaudiobible.com also. There is a link on the homepage. If you’re using the app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address, if that's your preference, is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement, you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the little red button up at the top or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that's it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hey DAB family it's Doctor John from Jordan New York calling in for our anonymous 29-year-old mom with postpartum depression and a 3-month-old. Dear, you are not alone and not just in the spiritual sense where we're all around you and praying for you, but in the sense that this is something very common. You may not know this but I'm a family doctor and I deliver babies and so I do deal with postpartum depression unfortunately quite a bit. Part of this is a spiritual battle and that's the part where you've got to understand what you're fighting against so that you can fight back. And you need to fight back. So, Satan and his minions, his demons are going to come against you and they're going to say you're fat, you're ugly, you're stupid, you're worthless, it's useless, nobody loves you, no one cares about you, you might as well die. But you need to tell Satan and his demons to shut up and you do that in Jesus’ name. In Jesus name I command you to be silent. And that is how you get those voices out of your head that just keep hammering away making you hurt and making you feel worthless. Also finding a good Christian counselor can be very, very helpful. So, you've got this. Medication can be very helpful. I use that quite a bit. But prayer and fighting against Satan and the evil spirits that are trying to tear your down, that's where you get over this. We love you. You've got this. Let us know how you're doing. Peace and love. Doctor John from Jordan New York. Bye-bye.

Hello, my name is Lynn I really just found out about the Daily Audio Bible maybe in the last six months and I want to say I have enjoyed listening and hearing the prayers of the people praying for the requests that have been made. I am calling to leave a prayer request. It's for myself, it's for my daughter, her family. She has a really rocky marriage. I mean really rocky marriage and I try helping her with the kids as…as much as I can. I babysit them every day four children 8 years old and under geared. One is on the autism spectrum and the baby being one. And the…the relationship between my daughter and her husband is just…it's just really, really heartbreaking. And I guess I'm calling because I would like to see God move on their behalf and…and also for myself because it's hard for me to watch what's going on daily to my grandchildren and what's going on to my daughter because my…my…my son in law is not an attentive husband or is he an attentive father. And I'm not saying that all the blame is being pieced on him and I know that people can't give what they don't have but I'm just asking that, you know, that…that I would be prayed for, that my daughter would be prayed for, her children and my son in law as well for his salvation in particular. So, thank you so much Daily Audio Bible listeners and prayer warriors. And thank you to Brian and his family for allowing themselves to be used by God in this way. Thanks.

Hi this is Maria and I'm a follower of Jesus and I've listened to DAB the DAB for several years now. I just thank you so much Brian and family for doing all of this. I just love this community it's been such a blessing in my life, and I thank you and I'm calling for the first time. I've made three recordings but I'm trying to get through a recording without crying. So, I just need prayer for my daughter who's 26 her name is Taylor and about a year and a half ago she met a guy who groomed her and fed her drugs and started trafficking her and by the time we figured out what was going on she was knee deep in this darkness and we could not pull her out. She didn't even want to get out. She's…so she's completely in love with this pimp boyfriend and she's working a massage parlor living in a hotel and the massage parlor is a prostitution ring. And I feel so hopeless. I need prayer for my daughter. I need her to come back to Jesus and…and I just…there's a missionary team that…that’s decided to take on her case. They do go in after these girls and they're gonna…his name is Andrew he's getting a team together to go and get her out, to try to reach out to her and get her out of there. Please pray for his team and please pray for Taylor's heart to be prepared. And I just thank you so much you guys. I love you so much and I pray for you. Whenever I listen to the prayers, I pray for you. My heart is always so tender towards you guys.

Hey DABbers, this is Micah in Awe in the Kansas City area. I just wanted to call and shed some light on conviction versus condemnation. One is from God one is from Satan. Biola from Maryland touched on this the other day and I caught a piece of it and I realized, like last night when I was trying to go to bed my thoughts were racing and I kept thinking about I was screwing up in different ways, that the sins that I've done lately popped into my mind. And I felt a feeling of hopelessness like it was in my tired state. Like now that I'm sober minded and awake I realize that it was condemnation from the enemy. It was Satan straight up in my ear telling me all the ways I'm a screw up and that I'm hopeless like all those parts of the Bible where God is putting His wrath on people and destroying people and that's me now, you know, like that's what I was thinking last night, like I'm under this wrath. Like, but now that I'm sober minded I realized that was from the enemy. And when I receive conviction from God it's different, it's a knowledge of the sin that I've done and it's a way to renew myself from it, like to repent from it, to turn from it, to do…to apologize to whoever…to do better, right? But when it's from Satan the condemnation then it's a feeling of hopelessness, it's a feeling of you…you're a screw up, you can't fix it, you're under the wrath of God, you're going to hell. That's what kind of nation feels like, right? So, I want all of you to be able to pinpoint that when it happens to you so that you don't fall victim to this. Know that you…you will receive conviction but that's good, that's good. That's means God is watching you and He's working with you. Condemnation, you don't even need to listen to it. I love you guys. Hang in there.

Hello DAB family it's Julie from southern Illinois longtime listener first time caller. I want to thank Adrian from Washington DC for her encouraging words and openly thanking God this morning. I'm so glad she's made so much progress. I too want to thank God for all He has done for me in my life. But at present my husband of 20 years has asked me for a divorce and I'm lost but I know God has a plan, I trust God and I know I will come through this all the better. Please pray family that I continue to praise and thank God through this. Adrian, again thank you so very, very much. I'm lifting you up in my prayers. DAB family have a blessed day.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible community today is March the 3rd and my name is D calling from New York. I’m a first-time caller, three-year listener. I actively pray for everyone. I listen daily, just never ever called in. Today I'm calling for prayer requests as I was recently diagnosed with covid and so was my son. Thank God we're both experiencing mild enough symptoms and I trust God that we are going to get through this just fine. So, the reason for my prayer request is for my husband who though still awaits his covid test result has begun to experience symptoms. They are a little bit more intense than my sons and I and so because he has underlying conditions that are likely to complicate things for him, I'm really hoping for your prayers. And I pray that God would strengthen his body and his immune system so that he's able to fight this off and get through it fine. Thanks in advance for your prayers for all three of us but especially for my husband. Thank you.

[booksandwords]

Debt by K.C. Wells

Series: Love, Unexpected #1 Read Time: 2 Days Rating: 4/5

The quote: Mitch, you need someone who looks at you like you hung the moon. Someone who clearly loves being with you. Someone who makes you laugh, makes you smile. Someone who looks like he can’t wait to have some alone time, just the two of you. — Gareth Jenkins

Warnings: A mix of noncon and dubcon, drug trafficing gone wrong, human trafficing. None are the focus but they are important to the story. And key to the relationship of the main to characters.

I was wondering what it would take for some kind of long-form book to drag me out of my recent reading slump. Apparently it's a book that has been sitting on my tbr pile for far too long featuring exactly my kind of men (and two days of no internet). Nikko is my kind of character bookish, softly spoken exterior hiding an inner badass willing to do anything for those he cares for. He's also physically stunning and I want to steal his hair. His man is Mitch loyal, perceptive and a gentleman. His being in his head a lot in relatable. Their 23 year age difference is there but basically a non event. It is barely raised aside for by Valarie. And then in a positive way. Debt is set circa the Supreme Court decision legalising gay marriage, it is more about love finding a way.

Okay I need to mention the supporting cast. The supporting cast is largely Mitch's family. His mother Valarie is lovely she is basically the comic relief. “I’ll be honest. When I first found out how old you are, it did concern me. Not so much now—I was looking into the future and imagining when Mitch is seventy and you’re still a spring chicken at forty-seven….”. She may meddle but she loves her kids and knows how to make them happy, to a degree the mother of dreams. She is also gifted at people reading. Cal is another favourite at 18 he's the baby gay, his relationship with Nikko is too sweet for words. Gareth, Mitch's older brother, is just interesting. Mitch says he may be gay and no know it, implying he's never bought anyone home or been a relationship of any form. He's honestly soft coded aroace or at least can be read that way if you so wish (which I will because I'm me). I love the whole family they are so supportive of their gay brother, the only time they question his actions is out of fear for familial safety (there is legitimate context).

Love, Unexpected is a duology at this point. The leading men for Burden are, as is expected, introduced in Debt. Jesse and Randy. They are counterpoints to all the bad Nikko's world. With the brilliant line “This is gonna get me into so much trouble, but you know what? Fuck it. Some things are worth it.” I really like Randy. He's supposed to be a mysterious power of good. Like Mitch and Nikko Randy is kinda out of place in the Black Lounge but it's hard to tell exactly why. Jesse fits right in, he's there by choice and loves his work. But becomes an ally to Nikko educating him in the screwed up mess he has found himself in.

Okay so before reading this take note it does deal with drug couriering gone wrong, human trafficking and only barely willing bdsm (not graphically shown). It isn't graphic per se but does deal with the emotional fall out of victimhood. It is a plot and character-driven romance the smut goes hot and heavy fast (Nikko is in a brothel after all) but it isn't the focus of the book. There are brilliant diverse characters who suit their roles. I would recommend reading the excerpt for Burden for a resolution to one storyline. This is a wonderful work, it does stand alone. I recommend it if the content is not taxing for you and mlm floats your boat.

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

Taehyung Halloween Scenario| You both are ghosts haunting a house and you compete to see who can scare people the most

So this wasn’t a request but I got this from a random writing prompt generator and I thought it sounded fun and perfect for Halloween. So happy Halloween everyone!

“So what are we now... 4 and 2?” 

“No way that last person that came in here was totally more afraid of me than they were of you! You radiate too much happy energy and they can sense it. More like we’re tied up now 3 and 3.” Taehyung chuckles at you.

“Alright y/n, I’ll agree I guess. We’re tied now. But the night is young and I will beat you!”

“In your dreams Tae! Actually not even then because you’re a ghost and don’t sleep!”

You had been at this haunting this house for as long as you can remember. It was the abandoned house at the end oft he street. Countless people told stories about it. A few brave souls dared to enter every so often. It never ceased to amuse you how a simple creaking of a floor board or door opening would cause adults to go scrambling and screaming out of the house. One day, you noticed a handsome young man show up in the house. You had woken up and found him there, standing in your kitchen like he owned the place. You pick a floorboard up and toss it across the room, landing next to him. 

“You’re gonna have to try harder than that to scare me.” He turns around and looks right at you.

“Wait a minute you can see me?”

“Yes?”

“So.. are you a ghost too? What the heck are you doing here?”

“Well normally I haunt the house next door.. but I’m lonely and decided to come over here to visit you.” Your heart pangs at this, knowing that feeling all too well. 

“Well what’s your name?”

“Taehyung.. What about you?”

“Y/n.” He gives you a wide boxy smile and you immediately feel warm and welcome around this man.

“Alright Taehyung you can stay. I guess. Welcome to my humble abode.” 

“Why do you stay here? The place is falling apart..”

“This was my childhood home it didn’t always look like this..”

“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It’s fine Taehyung. I’m just glad to have someone else here to talk to that can actually talk back.” He smiles at you, and he’d hold your hand if he could. 

Since that day you two had quickly became fast friends. When Halloween was approaching you had made a bet, whoever could scare the most people out of the house won. You weren’t really sure what to bet since you both didn’t own anything.. so you just decide to make it a friendly competition for bragging rights.

Throughout the day multiple  people had came in, and all had ran out screaming. As it was getting late at night you knew more people would be coming in, braver souls who decided to come in after dark so you knew you’d have to turn it up a notch. A group of men had come into the house. 

“Come on, Jin quit being such a baby this place probably isn’t even that bad.” 

“Not that bad?! Namjoon have you not heard the stories? This place is the real deal, it’s haunted as hell.” You watch the group of them walk around the different rooms. You had gathered all their names based on their conversations with one another. Jin and Hoseok were terrified, you knew they would be the easiest ones to scare. You and Taehyung had mutually agreed that scaring them out of the house would only be .5 a point each because you were 99% positive they would run at the creak of a floorboard. Jungkook and Yoongi were 2 points each. Jungkook seemed super competitive and you knew he wasn’t going to run for much. Yoongi was rather intimidating and looked bored from the moment he walked in and you knew he wouldn’t be an easy scare. Jimin and Namjoon you couldn’t really get a good read on so you decided just one point for each of them. Although Jimin was clinging rather closely to Jungkook so you thought he wouldn’t leave as long as Jungkook stayed. 

“Ready to let the fun begin y/n?”

“Yep.. let’s do this. Who you going for first?”

“Not Yoongi or Jungkook that’s for damn sure that’s going to take some build up.” 

“Well, Hoseok and Jin are still standing in the door way so why don’t we make sure they don’t want to come in to begin with?” Namjoon turns around after this and notices the two of them still standing on the front porch.

“You chickens coming or not?”  

You giggle to yourself and slam the door shut. 

“Oh fuck this I am out. You guys are crazy I am not even setting one toe in that house!” Hoseok yells as he retreats off the steps and onto the side walk. Jin was already long gone the minute he saw the door about to slam shut. You and Taehyung are both laughing hysterically.

“That was too easy I feel bad taking 1 point for that.”

“I mean technically they weren’t in the house yet.. you didn’t scare them out of the house like the rules.” You jut your lower lip out in a pout and Taehyung relents.

“Alright, alright. So now it’s 4-3.” Taehyung glances around and sees they predictably have split up into pairs. Jimin with Jungkook, and Namjoon with Yoongi. Jungkook and Jimin were exploring the kitchen while Namjoon and Yoongi had went upstairs. Taehyung makes his way into the kitchen. He slowly opens one of the cabinet doors, allowing it to make a loud creaking sound. Jimin jumps and turns around.

“Um.. was that cabinet door always open?”

“It’s an old house Jimin don’t let stuff like that scare you.” He opens another door right in front of them and they both watch the door slowly open right in front of their eyes.

“That’s not just an old house Jungkook! That’s a freaking ghost! Can we go now please? I don’t want to be here anymore. Let’s just go grab Yoongi and Namjoon and get out of here.” 

“Ah calm down Jimin don’t be such a baby! If all this ghost is gonna do is open a few doors then that’s not even scary. They’re gonna have to try harder than that if they want me gone.” Suddenly a plate flies out of one of the cupboards and crashes into the wall next to their heads. Jimin yells and immediately bolts out of the kitchen and out the front door. You and Taehyung are both collapsed on the ground laughing your butts off as Jungkook goes chasing after him to try and convince him to come back inside.

“Well, that’s 3 points for me. Guess I’m leading now 4-6.” 

“Yeah yeah there’s still the two upstairs and 3 more points up for grabs.” You both float upstairs and find that they are in your parents old room. 

“Well I guess we’re the only two left eh Yoongi?”

“It would seem that way yes. You know the bet was that whoever the first two out were would buy the others dinner so we can both leave. We already don’t have to buy.”

“Are you scared? Wanna leave you big chicken?”

“No! I just don’t want to stay in this dusty old falling apart house. I’m probably going to get a respiratory illness from this shit.” 

“He just insulted my house!”

“The nerve of that man. You better scare him good y/n.” 

You slam the bedroom door closed, locking too. Namjoon runs over to the door and attempts to open it, only to find it won’t budge.

“Alright Jungkook if that’s you its not funny let us out.” You chuckle to yourself. You walk over to the mirror that Yoongi is standing in front of and write a message in the dust.

I’m not Jungkook.

“Shit. Namjoon open the fucking door I want to get out of here.”

“I’m trying but it won’t open!” Yoongi starts banging on the door and Namjoon looks around the room for another way out. Taehyung giggles to himself and you turn and look at him, head tiled and a questioning look on your face.

“You wanna see something funny?”

“Sure.”

“Alright, go unlock the door since they aren’t trying to open it anymore.” Both of them are now looking around frantically for a way out. Yoongi is shouting at the other members out the window to get their asses upstairs and let them out but they all refuse. 

“If something has you scared Yoongi there ain’t no way any of us are coming in there!” You hear Jungkook yell. Taehyung grabs the blanket off the bed and throws it over himself like a child’s attempt at a ghost costume. 

“Boooooo I’m a ghost! Fear me!” Taehyung yells comically. You grip your stomach as you fall on the ground and burst into laughter, tears springing from your eyes. Namjoon turns around and sees the floating blanket and yells loudly, running for the bedroom door and pulling on it as hard as he can, expecting it to still be locked. He falls on the ground from the force he opened the door but immediately gets up and runs out with Yoongi running quickly behind him. Taehyung pulls the blanket off his head and you both continue laughing together. 

“So I win then? 4-9?”

“What?! No way! I definitely got Yoongi he would have been out that door if it hadn’t have been locked.” 

“But-!”

“Please Taetae?” He pinches the bridge of his nose, knowing damn well you know he can’t say no to you when you use the fond nickname.

“Alright.. fine! But that means you still lost then! Because it would be 6-7.” 

“The night is still young Tae. More people will come in here and I will beat you by the end of the night.” Taehyung smiles fondly at you, reaching his hand out and attempting to ruffle up your hair, only to have his hand phase right through you. He frowns and pulls his hand away.

“How stupid is it that we can interact with objects in the human world but we can’t touch each other? I just want to hug you.” 

“Well, you can Tae. It’s the same concept when you change yourself to be able to pick up objects. It just takes a lot more energy and a lot of ghosts can’t do it..See?” You hold your hand out and Taehyung notices it looks more solid now. He tries to do the same but is only able to make his finger tips look more solid. He brushes his fingers across the back of your hand and smiles widely. 

“You’re warmer than I imagined you'd be.”

“So are you..” You two enjoy the soft moment together before you hear another group of people approaching the house.

“Shall we?”

“You’re on.” 

[meirimerens]

If you're accepting fandom questions could we have some elaboration about those mgs jupiter family alaskan daydreams please? Also your amazing TEW art got me into the series so thanks, I'm liking it a lot!!

first of all, i’m so deeply honored that my art could get you into a game, and also : god i’m fucking sorry lol

second of all

oh god oh fuck alaskan daydreams time

okay so long /, the read mores don’t work, you’re gonna have to bear with it

so tldr i have… EXTENSIVE imaginated stories about dave, hal and sunny living in a little remote cabin in alaska. 

BACKSTORY 

i’d imagine it’d come somewhere post-mgs2 even though sunny is already a bit grown so maybe like just disregard canon OR imagine a different timeline i don’t know, and it’s from a place where hal and dave don’t have anything to do after the mgs2 incidents (so no mgs4 and love of god NO accelerated aging i can’t deal with this), and there is this atmosphere of… “we’ve been sticking together for so long, i can’t see ourselves just parting ways (plus we have a kid to raise and i can’t imagine raising her alone) so how about we make the rest of our lives together” and dave is just like… “hey, we’ve been running all across the country, jumping from shitty motel to shitty motel to shittier apartments, and i have this cabin i once lived in, how about we just all move into it and re-inhabit it” and that’s just how it starts. 

THE CABIN

it’s a cabin i have extensively thought about (because i’m obsessed with cabins and being a hermit, so that helps). it’d be near the shore of the Twin Lakes, Alaska (taken from the canon fact that this is where snake lived pre-MGS1), so they’d live off-the-grid and in almost-self-sufficiency (they become more and more self-sufficient as time goes on and they make more adjustments to the cabin). 

i imagine it would look similar to Proenneke’s cabin (which incidentally is also near Twin Lakes), maybe on the other shore, all wood with a vegetation/moss roof + a slight porch/elevation to protect the entrance from a bit of the snow. it’d be surrounded by wooden little dog kennels/crates for the huskies (more on that later) similar to the ones in [this video] around the 0:59 min mark (warning for animal death/general stuff that goes on in a trapper’s lifestyle for the vid).

it here’s a floor plan of the cabin, not to proportions because i’m just shit at it :

(good luck reading that)

not pictured : when sunny was smaller (before the addition), her bed was like a little shelf just above the big bed (that hal and dave share) with little like “walls” so she doesn’t fall and a thick mattress, which was discarded when she got her new room.

later would be added an outdoor kitchen and a chicken coop (more on that…….. later)

EATING THERE

as i said, they’d first be living in semi-dependency : every ¾ weeks they’d have to go to Port Alsworth/Anchorage or somewhere else to stock tf up. Snake would fish (you can fish for subsistence if you’ve been living in Alaska for over a year according to law) and hunt (seems to be the same type of law when hunting for food, YES i’ve researched this, leave me alone) for food. As he has done odd jobs to afford his cabin, I imagine he’d have done crabbing, and would show up to help on crabbing boats from time to time to get some of them crabs.

later, I imagine they would get 4 rescue hens to get some of them fresh eggs. snake would build a chicken scoop from forest wood. 1 of the hens wouldn’t be able to make eggs because she was traumatized from the industry but they still took her in because she was close friends with the other hens and they didn’t want to separate them. 

I imagine Snake had been growing his own herbs in the kitchen but maybe they’d get a greenhouse ready.

they’d go foraging for berries, fruits and mushrooms according to the seasons and make a SHITTON of jams and preserves.

LIVING THERE

i imagine there would be a lot of solidarity with the surrounding populations. for exemple, Hal would help set up and manage online dictionaries for Iñupiat, Yup'ik or Alutiiq languages with the local communities, maybe help wire up some schools, things like that, and as thanks some people would go check on them and give em veggies or something.

THE DOGS :

Snake is getting them.

since we don’t know what happened to his huskies around mgs1, i suppose/guess they were at some time confiscated from him, so first, he’s get a lovely husky female from a shelter (i also have long thought about how he’d never go to a breeder and only adopt, because the whole “creature created with a man’s ideal in mind” hits a bit too close for him you feel) that would later be revealed as pregnant with like 5 puppies (it will come back later as relevant as promise). Then he’d do his best to regain contact with his huskies, maybe setting up a call on social media (THIS WILL BE PART OF A BRAIN ROTTING DEGENERACY I WILL EXPAND ON IN A MINUTE) to find them again. i imagined he would get to see one of his old huskies, who has well aged, who was adopted by some nice nice people. then said nice people, after his visit, insisting on him getting his husky back because “since you left she hasn’t been herself, she refused to eat. we think she misses you too much. we love her tons and it breaks our heart to let her go, but we think she would be so much happier by your side” type of deal, i’m fucking crying just thinking about it.

of course, once his team is back in shape, he’s run the Iditarod again. Hed keep contact with hal over walkietalkie during the race. hal would jump in his arms when he crosses the finish line, the pic would circulate in the news. it’d be cute i’m saying.

THE HENS :

as I said, adopted, in a little scoop snake built himself. they give eggs. sometimes they let them roam free and they bully hal when he peels vegetables (i’ve drawn smth about this). sunny feeds them in the mornings. things are good.

MORNING ROUTINE :

Snake wakes up around 5AM because he don’t need no sleep and goes to his huskies. feeds them. then make them run. when he gets back around 8 to 8:30, hal is still asleep. snake makes breakfast. the scents wake hal up. things are good.

SUNNY?

Sunny is taught by snake how to chop wood. he makes a tiny axe for her tiny hands. he and hal teach her how to swim in the Twin Lakes. the waters cold but she grows immune to it, strong and stronger. she learns how to differenciate which mushrooms and berries are edible.

they try to send her to school but she’s WAY too advanced and is bored to death. she stays at home. she’s outside all day or she learns astrophysics with Hal, who’s taking online classes in his free time. she learns some Athabaskan languages at a community class once in a while, she makes some friends.

HOW’S THE WEATHER

They go on hikes a lot. Often, and long ones. At first, sunny is in a little baby back carrier (i have drawn about this), then she walks just right. Alaska has gorgeous national parks, they explore them, year after year. They arrive in a town, exhausted and beat, they find a hotel room. It has a bathtub and warm water. Hal is OVERJOYED.

in the earliest hints of spring, snake takes them to Fairbanks through the beautiful alaskan railroad. they see the most beautiful and powerful of northern lights during the full season. hal and sunny can’t tear their eyes from the skies.

THIS IS WHERE I GO CRAZY GO STUPID.

ok…. so bear with me.

i mentioned an internet/social media presence.

it’s because in a deviation of this daydream, snake has a little youtube channel (and an instagram to go with it).

it’s not much. it’s really not, but hal has a few cameras and more that he finds and fixes.

it’s mostly lowkey, chill vlogs. stuff like 

“slow alaskan winter day (no talking)” 

“sprintime berry picking ( + jams recipes!)”

“alaskan summer outdoor fire cookout ( + wild moose and caribou near the lake)”

“denali national park hike (day 1)”

stuff that like you know. as well as some more…

“i ran the iditarod (and won)”

“we got hens (building a chicken scoop, meeting the rescue hens and more)”

“musher’s morning routine (i’d recommend you didn’t try this at home if you are not the genetically engineered clone of a super-soldier, for your sake)”

and as you guessed…

“so our rescue husky was pregnant… (i’m an idiot who didn’t notice, trip to the vet, building a whelping pen, whelping, bottlefeeding tiny pup + all the puppies’ pictures!)”

where dave would teach hal how to bottlefeed a puppy and you’d be able to hear hal’s “oh god oh god oh god oh god”s from out of frame as the camera focuses on dave’s hands holding his to have him perfectly cup the puppy in his palm and carry the bottle. this type of deal.

then follow-up videos of the puppies climbing the bed where hal is, playing on his gameboy. he chuckles nervously and then heartily when a puppy licks his face.

some winter days, the videos have snake bringing all the huskies in the small cabin. some of them sit calmly on the wide bed where hal studies his astrophysics.

and an instagram with wilderness pictures… all except a few taken by hal. some of snake posing in front of the snowed in cabin. some of warm drinks made on winter days. you know the deal.

and they’d have such a nice… positive… lowkey and easy-going comment section. dave would reply to a lot of them. 

he’d get quite a share of “hey man, i love your vids so much, thank you for posting this content. i was wondering, sorry if it’s a bit too personal, are you and your roommate dating? you two seem very close, but i don’t want to assume anything 😅 absolutely love your content either way, you’re the only youtuber i have notifs on” to which he’d reply “thank you so much, really appreciate it. and we’re not, we’ve just known each other for a long, long time. we’re aware two straight guys raising a child and living together isolated makes for a bit of confusion, but it’s totally platonic between us. thanks for sticking around.” but one day he uploads a vid that’s like 

“crabbing in juneau ! + life update (please read description)”

and the desc + the first 20 seconds of the vid is a text superimposed over embarassing pictures of hal and it reads “hey all / quick personal update, i’ll make it quick / otacon and i realized we loved each other / (as more than friends that is) / so if we seem just a bit closer in the videos from now on this is why / no idea how this is going to turn out for up / but yeah. if he seems a bit more affectionate it’s because we’re dating now, or something like that / and to everyone whom i told ‘it’s just strictly platonic between us’:  / well. ha ha. whoops. / anyway thank you for reading / enjoy the video” and all the comments would be like “that’s so dope i’m so happy for you” and other “tbf we saw that coming” and snake would smash that like button on these comments.

and he’d have a video of the whole iditarod race as taken from a camera on his jacket/on his sled… and he’d have videos of him filming hal film the landscape through the window of the train during their trip to fairbanks… and of hal and sunny in said train sharing a tangerine… and of him building a little axe for sunny…. and he’d always ask her if she is okay with being on camera, and when she’d say no he’d make sure she doesn’t appear on here or add a cute husky sticker on her face so she’s not seen.

just lowkey. chill. upbeat. simple life moments. he’d disappear off the internet for a month because he’s just enjoying the life and when he’d come back everyone would be very understanding and glad to see some cool pictures or vids. you know? just chilling. just chilling. just living.

one day before a “hiking through lake clark national park” he has the same little life update thing and it goes “hey / so otacon and i got married / sunny and aksinya [rescued pregant husky] were our flower girls / otacon cried / i cried / anyway, enjoy the video” over pictures of the tiny alaskan wedding. and it’s well.

[forehead-enthusiast]

A Buncha Tag Games (and yet not all of them)

tagged by: @eggyukhei mwah

tagging: this is a LOT of games so i’ll only tag @atinyphobe @nsheetee and @veonjun for the SECOND (2nd) game. if they or anybody wants to do any of the other games, absolutely go for it and say i tagged you <3 i’d love to see what you guys say!! (also, tk if you felt like you wanted to answer my questions from the second game i’d be interested to see!)

One:

tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?

ok SO the song that probably got me into rv 100% (also yes ik this blog is 99% nct but rv is my forever fave no question) was probably ice cream cake!! i had been a casual listener of many groups up until that point and had never really stanned anyone, but icc was so infectious i found myself watching it over and over. i had heard happiness and be natural before but hadn’t really listened too closely, so icc was the song that captured me. after that, dumb dumb only cemented my love for them more, and the red is still one of my favorite kpop albums to date. rv attracted me primarily because of their incredible vocals and their versatility in genres and concepts. i still get so excited wondering what they’ll tackle next!! they’re just soooo unique and have one of, if not the best discographies of any group. i cannot stress enough, I. Love. RV!! also they’re funny and gay so. anyway stream monster once it drops uwu

Two:

rule: answer the ten questions and write your own!

1. what is your favorite song that’s been released during quarantine? ooooo honestly??? probably something off of Sawayama. literally every song bangs so hard i highly recommend that album to anyone!! i can’t pick a favorite off it but who’s gonna save you now is awesome and xs is just,,, chef’s kiss

2. what is your greatest mishap when you tried cooking? (or something you’ve witnessed) one time, while making soup at my late grandmother’s house on her like gas stove, i put a lid on a pot and somehow that led the pot to be engulfed in flames. IN MY DEFENSE i was like 7, and i’m great at cooking/baking now

3. what’s your go-to outfit or article of clothing? oh i love a nice dress. they can be casual or formal, and you look like you put effort into your outfit except i didn’t because i didn’t have to match anything yo!!!! also shorts have trouble fitting me cause i’m a weird body type so dresses tend to be very comfy for me

4. what is your comfort food? am i allowed to say like all food??? eating in itself is comforting,,, that sounds depressing but also i just like eating yummy food. i guess i’d say like my dad’s fried rice?? its my fave and no one makes it like him soooo

5. what singular moment in your life would you like to relive? i couldn’t tell if this meant like, a good moment you want to re-experience or go back in time and redo a moment and fix it. it’s kind of a hard question so i might cop out and go with a bit of a silly answer: i want to relive the hi touch with astro...... i wanna look at rocky’s beautiful eyes and touch moonbin’s hand ok,,,,

6. what is your favorite line and/or character from a movie, show, or book? i got a bunch but a few off the top of my head are genie lo (the epic crush of genie lo), ty lee, suki (atla), klaus, and ben (umbrella academy) 

7. if you could only choose one ice cream flavor and pizza topping/style for the rest of your life, what would it be? ice cream flavor: this very specific one from a local store that is banana ice cream with strawberries and oreo mixed in. it is heaaaavenly. as for pizza topping, i love a breakfast type pizza with an egg on top and like sausage and stuff!!!

8. what is the worst injury you’ve ever had or witnessed? funny enough, i’ve actually gotten badly injured quite a few times, and always on the face!! god hates me. the worst was probably when i hit a metal bench with my face and it took a chunk out of my cheek. i still have the scar! as for “witnessed” i accidentally broke a grown man’s rib once as a child, so i guess that would count.

9. would you rather explore the unknown of space or the bottom of the ocean? oceaaaan!! i answered this in some other game, but i like how mysterious and yet close the ocean is. like proximity wise it’s so near, yet there’s an insane amount we know nothing about. that’s so frightening but so intriguing

10. if you could be any cartoon character, who would you be? my first thought was literally “kirby. eat fast” GOD my followers are gonna think i’m just a glutton and they’re not even gonna be wrong im dying. but uhh idk mulan or smth?

my questions:

what is your go-to feel good movie?

are you the type of person who’s indecisive about buying, or the type to impulse buy once you see something you like?

do you prefer chocolate-y or fruity candy?

what idol do you think is most similar to you? (not your bias necessarily)

do you have any silly dealbreakers? if so, what are they?

what do you do to unwind?

what is a small thing you like to do for people you love? (be it sending memes, remembering their favorite shows, etc)

what’s/who’s your favorite myth/mythological being?

what is a non-typical pet you would want to have?

do you say pronounce data as day-ta or dah-ta?

THREE

rule: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations, then tag nine people. 

AIR ༉⋆͙̈

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE ༉⋆͙̈

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER ༉⋆͙̈

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH ༉⋆͙̈

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER ༉⋆͙̈

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

FOUR

the ultimate tag: answer whichever ones you want to because there are a lot and then tag a few blogs you’d like to get to know better! 

PERSONAL

name: sarah

nickname: bells

birthday: april 17th

zodiac: aries

nationality: chinese american

languages: english, some spanish, some korean

gender: female

sexuality: baby bi bi bi~

height: 5′10

BLOG STUFF

inspiration for muse: i suppose nct since i write for them the most?? but i feel like sometimes i come up with the idea before i think of a member so sometimes the muse is just my own fantasies oops

meaning behind my url: i made it at a time where loads of idols were getting bangs and honestly i believe most of them look infinitely better without them, thus i was and still am enthusiastic about foreheads.

blog established: like winter of 2018...?? i think

followers: over 2.5k but most deactivated/left during my hiatus lol

FAVORITES

favourite animals: sharks, chickens, snakes, cats, penguins

favourite books: the epic crush of genie lo and then iron will of genie lo, PERIOD

favourite colour: pink and purple!!

favourite fictional characters: lol, again, genie lo, ty lee, suki, klaus, ben, and just a few more: richard and evelyn o’connell (the mummy), dave (dave), michael (the good place)

favourite flower: sunflower

favourite scent: baking chocolate, heating butter, blackberry, wisteria

favourite season: probably spring! i like warmth but not HEAT

RANDOM

average hours of sleep: ugh idek i sleep horribly

cats or dogs: both, but unfortunately i’ve never had either

coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea but then hot chocolate

current time: 5:29pm

dream trip: go to paris and eat loads of pastries and enjoy the fashions and beauty of the city, and also learn to bake better maybe?

dream job: actress

hobbies: making jewelry, drawing, singing, reading comics

hogwarts house: according to the quizzes, all of them. people who have just met me think slytherin or gryffindor, people who i’m friends with think ravenclaw or hufflepuff, people who know me really well know you can’t box a person into oversimplified archetypes :’) in my assessment of myself, it varies by the day, but i think perhaps gryffindor today?

last movie watched: hot fuzz (a classic)

last song listened to: summer breeze by sf9

no. of blankets you sleep with: like 2

random fact(s): i won lego building competitions as a child, one of my dream roles is anastasia from the musical named after her, i played violin for a very short time, i bake the cakes for all my family and friends’ birthdays, i have strangely strong grip strength

SIX

10 songs i can’t stop listening to:

love me 4 me- rina sawayama

cherry- rina sawayama

in & out- red velvet

crush culture- conan gray

manic- conan gray

the king- conan gray

summer- pentagon

told you now- jeremy jordan (originally sung by sam smith)

fuck this world (interlude)- rina sawayama

someone who loves me- sara bareilles

[rcris123]

The buck fathers

“Chloe, look out!”

Too late, the car swerves out of the road, into the ditch. There’re no airbags in this thing so both of them end up slamming with their entire bodies into the board. Head bumps against the windscreen.

 “Ow...” That’s one hell of a headache if she’s ever had one. “Ow, ow ow ow...” Chloe tries to pull back slowly. “Max?...” Panic. “Max!”

She rushes over to shake her friend awake, but to no real avail. She seems to be breathing though. Shit, shit, shit-

The other car stopped as well. Two men came out, running towards them. One’s got a stupid cowboy hat.

“You okay there?” The cowboy dude bend through the window, then grimaced when seeing Max like she was. “Shit... Buck, call 911!”

“On it already.”

“Can you get out, miss?” The man said, extending a hand.

“I... Think so.” Chloe tried to pull herself out of where she got crashed to.

“They’re on their way here!” the other, ‘Buck’, beckoned, somewhere between her car and their own, just putting his phone back in his pocket.

With just a little help, a bit of a struggle, heart running a minute a mile, Chloe got out of the wreckage and that’s when realization sunk in, faster than the ache in her ankle and knee:

“Shit... Shit shit! Fuck! Fuck no...” She hit a stone with her foot, pursing her lips and rolling her fists when the bristle pain shot up through the leg. And let’s not even mention feeling like she’ll fall over ‘cause her head was as big as a bowling ball and twice as heavy, hurting like it just came out of the goddamn track after hitting all the pins.

That was all she got left of Arcadia. That car and Max.

The car’s ruined...

The cowboy, a massive dude with a real thick southern - or maybe it was midwestern – accent, came nearer, hands raised as if trying to pet her. She’s no animal.

“Miss?...”

But she doesn’t pull away when the man tries to put one of those hands on her shoulder. She could use the comfort, well at least that’s what she thinks...

“Just call me Chloe...”

“I’m Arthur. Arthur Castellanos. You a’right there? Bumped ye’r head or somethin?”

“...I’ll live-”

The somewhat silence that settled in after the crash got busted by the cries of a small child.

“Daddy?” A girl, maybe 10 or 12 pokes her head out of the van the two strangers got out of. “Isaac’s...”

“Want me to check up on him?” Arthur shouts over to ‘Buck’. Guess they were partners and that was one weird fucking petname.

“No, no, I got this.” The brunet heads back into the car. There’s some mumbling, then the man gets out of the car with the baby.

She can’t help it; she doesn’t have the nerves not to talk about something: “So... urhm, that your kid?”

“Yea-”

A muffled sound from the car, movement: “Chloe-”

Sprained ankle and all Chloe jumps towards the car, towards her one and only thing in this world. “Max!” Mister Cowboy Arthur follows, arms raised as if trying to stop them from doing something.

“Now you take it easy, miss. There’s an ambulance on the way here.” He talks, but between them, and Max still tries to stand up. A sigh: “Can you get out?”

“Yeah.” Why was her voice so weak, drained. It reminded her of that crazy week back- well she can’t call it a home now. Poof! One tornado and it vanished.

“Lemme help ya’ out.” Arthur huffs, arms like tree branches stretching inside to get Max out. And there she was.

“Max!” She’s not even fresh out of the wreckage when Chloe presses her within her arms: “Max, oh, Mad Max.” She was scared.

“Chloe... I’m fine...”

“We’re sill gettin’ the two of you checked by that ambulance.” Arthur said; now that was a dad tone if she ever heard one. Kinda familiar in a way.

“Thank you, Arthur, thank you.” Chloe said, and soon enough both of them get seated in the shade of a tree by the side of the road. It was one of those bright, hot summer days when, if you put as much as a pinky into sunlight, you’ll get burns.

The baby’s still crying and Arthur’s gone to check up on it. She’s guessing it’s the heat and the fact that they stopped for so long so suddenly. She’s feeling sorry. She almost ran them over, and then crashed Max into a ditch. Her head falls in her palms. Really sorry. She can’t even do driving right. Fingers claw at the scalp.

Baby switches dads, and she can still hear them talking.

“We should be calling their parents.” ‘Buck’ said.

“Shouldn’t we let ‘em call ‘em themselves?”

“Maybe we should wait for the ambulance before that.”

“I guess... Did it say how long till it’s gonna get here?”

“No...”

Baby seems to have calmed down under the gentle rubs of those big ass hands: “Is Lily a’right?”

And as on cue, girl pokes her head out, springs out of the car and clings to the ‘Buck’ dad; man bends down and picks her up: “It’s okay, Lily.”

“They okay, Daddy?”

“Guess so. Maybe we should give them some water. Wanna come with me?”

And Chloe dares a look at Max, slumped against the tree, staring back at her:

“Are we okay, Max?”

“Can’t say we haven’t been through worse-” slight smile; Maxine’s gotten her lips busted.

Red lights. The ambulance.

“C’mon up, Mad Max!” Chloe shouldn’t be jumping up like she did, but there she was to assist her girlfriend.

“What happened?” the paramedic asked.

“Misses got in an accident.” Arthur replied.

“And you were witness?”

“Yeah. They were goin’ fast and swerved into the side of the road trying to avoid us. We were comin’ from the opposite direction.”

“They’re conscious so we’re going to ask them a few questions- Miss?”

“Caulfield. Maxine.” Damn, she admired her courage.

They were asked to walk for a bit, had their blood pressure and heart-rate taken and all the other crap, allergies and the like. Then they were asked to phone their relatives. Max... Where would she be without her- Well obviously in a grave.

But what if that was better...

Now they had to tell those paramedics that she was an orphan. Well Max did, and she was also obligated to call her parents; told them they’ll be reaching Seattle tomorrow. She did all the legwork. Well... Max had the plan. Chloe just sort of tagged along to it all. It’s been about a week since it all happened. They tried calling Mom, Joyce, for a few days. At first there seemed to be some hope that she might pick up. No... The phone battery died about 3 days into their journey.

She cried that night, in the car. They had to stop. She cried all night. Didn’t even remember when she fell asleep. Max even tried to convince her to drive herself that day. Not happening.

They were heading to Seattle; hoping Mr. and Mrs. Caulfield will kindly take her in. Well... not with all those kisses and the possibility of a naughty one- Did she just think that... Yeah, regardless, it didn’t sound like it was gonna happen.

But Chloe got nothing left and this was probably her best chance at anything ever.

She fucked it all up this time around. If... if only Max chose-

 The paramedics let them go, blood wiped away and a cold compress applied to Chloe’s ankle. In the meantime tho’, the guys heard all they said, and Max told them about Arcadia, ‘cause she thought they surely heard on the news about the tornado. They did...

“You can spend the night at our place, and we’ll drive you tomorrow into Seattle. We stay in Olympia City.” The brunet said; Arthur was seating the baby back inside the car.

Did they have a choice?

“I mean sure...” Chloe said, and with that they hopped in the car. The girl got in Arthur lap.

“Oh. This is Lily. And that’s Isaac back there.” Kid fell asleep, chubby cheeks smooshed against the side of the baby chair. “I’m Sebastian. And Arthur. My husband.”

“Hello~” Arthur greeted, with a silly, long, drawn out o at the end. Sebastian smiled at that. And well Chloe had to as well; there’s something about seeing married gays that kinda gave her hope...

“So we ain’t going to the Nes Percy Park today?” the little girl, Lily, said. She meant the Nez-Perce National Park, right? Jesus they were on vacation and Chloe’s ruined it for them.

“We’re gonna go tomorrow after we leave the ladies back in Seattle.”

“Yes!”

“Ah, Chloe, right?” Arthur called back. “What’s your friend called.”

“Maxine, but you can call me Max. Caulfield.”

“Chloe Price.” She added; now she didn’t think saying her surname will leave her feeling bitter...

 The ride back to Olympia city was one surprise after another. Firstly, the dudes were unironically listening to Kesha and Lady Gaga like it was the best thing ever. The Johnny Cash and other country music she can’t place. But there was that one guitar solo that her dad used to listen to. They sang to it. And maybe for the first time in a long while Max saw her really smile; she started singing too, why the fuck not. Then the house came into view. Well, house is an understatement. The husbands had a whole fucking domain; ranch and all. Arthur proudly announced that they built the stables themselves, like the chicken coops and most of the garden. They had 5 fucking horses, goats and, obviously, chickens.

Chloe jumps straight outta the car to stare at the large, lavender lined, fields. Beside the house were tucked some bee hives and if the thought of insects wasn’t creepy the fact that they got themselves home-made honey simply had her in awe. Dude. What kind of magical fairy gay fathers did she stumble upon.

“Woah.” Yeah she couldn’t help it; leaned over the railing of one of the pastures. It stretched for so long! And indeed 5 horses grazed peacefully not too far off.

Maybe today wasn’t so bad...

She caught herself smiling before one of the horses, one with a brown head, fixed her attention on her and came towards her. Others noticed too but didn’t move.

“E-easy there.” The animal poked her massive snout beyond the fence, lips pouted as if sniffing.

“Chloe!?” Max sounded scolding; “Did you even ask?”

“It’s a’right!” Arthur beckoned from the car, unpacking some of the essentials. Sebastian was talking to a middle-aged lady on the porch; she was probably going to take care of the animals while they were away. “I could show ‘em to you later if you want to!”

“Of course!” Chloe was in heaven-

Dog!

Came running like a bullet and hopped up on her, tongue out, trying to lap at her face.

“Aa-!”

“Copper!” Dog perked its head back to Sebastian. “Down boy!”

Chloe tried her best: “Down boy, down!”

Dog listened, pranced back on all fours, wagging his thick tail side to side with such power it moved his entire butt.

A whistle from Arthur: “Com’ere, boy.” Damn that accent carried over in the way he said boy, but with that dog was off to it’s owner. Cowboy wasted no time bending down to bend the fluffster, the praises carrying over to her.

“Chloe? Max? What’d you like for dinner?” Sebastian had his hands on his hips; she just noticed that the man was dressed in a flannel that was now wrapped around his waist leaving the man in a tank-top. Damn what a dad...

No, actually, all of this.

Lily poked her head out of the house: “Shrimp Fajitas!”

“Seconded!” Arthur said. “Some fries and guacamole? Think we still have a couple o’shallots.”

“The avocado’s in the bags.” Sebastian said, those last lines were between themselves.

“Yup, gotcha.”

“So’s everyone down for shrimp fajitas?”

“Hell yes!” Chloe resonated, sprinting down the pasture to back home- nope, not sprinting, her ankle hurt lie a bitch.

But she gets to the house eventually, and inside: sunflowers on the table in the living, a cat on the couch and the kitchen being warmed up for dinner.

Of course Max helped with the dinner, or tried to, ‘cause they sorta let her on the back burner. Chloe was watching in awe from the couch. The girl plopped on her lap at one point, asked if she was alright, complimented her hair. Then her and Max tried to braid it. Lily tried on her beanie. It was too big for her head but it suits her. Somewhat.

The all cooked, dinner got served up. Arthur went upstairs to feed the baby, and play with him until he was all exhausted and ready for sleep. Sebastian informed the two of them that Max will be sleeping upstairs in Lily’s bedroom while Chloe will get the spare room downstairs. And the food was fucking delicious, tasty and juicy, with a little beat of heat in each bite. The guacamole too, you could tell it wasn’t one of those store-bought kinds that tasted just a bit too sweet, just a bit too addicting.

And it’s the fullest she felt all week. The two of them have been living off fast-food and snacks bought from gas stations at 2PM for the last past few days... Always on the road... And today, despite losing the car... she kinda felt the happiest she has been in a while... Like, things were gonna look up...

Max found herself playing with the cat, unexpectedly named, drumroll, Cat, and she watched. Lily went upstairs, looking for a boardgame, but instead came down with Arthur. It was getting pretty late.

“We gotta get the horses in the stables, wanna come with?” Arthur asked the girls.

Lily already bolted out the door.

“Isaac’s sleeping?” Sebastian intervened, looking up from the sink where the dishes just got done.

“Not really. He’s still a bit rowdy.”

“Should I put in a round of laundry?”

“I ain’t thinkin’ we got any? We did the last batch yesterday ‘cause the trip.”

Sebastian bobbed his head, hands on hips. “I’ll figure something out.”

“ ‘Course you will.” A peck on the lips as the cowboy parted from his husband to go rustle some horses.

What can she say, Chloe got all excited about it: getting to witness the gay wild west up close and personal. Man seriously just went about rounding horses up with a few whistles. All 5 of them came right up, ears perked and eyes all doe-like, snouts extended. Both Max and Chloe got designated halter holders as Arthur put them around the horses’ heads one by one. Chloe got the courage to try herself, on the little horse, the pony. She did it! ... after apologizing for bending the animal’s ear. Arthur laughed though. Presented them all.

“The black one’s Ash.” That one was the first to go into the stable. “He was a racer; got in a accident: caught in the chute at the start of a race.” And the poor thing has one big scar on the shoulder and some smaller ones on the neck and cheek. “He’s a bit jumpy ‘cause o’that but he’s a real good loyal horse and I have a hunch he’ll just die for Sebastian ‘cause he’s lovin’ that man so much.” Arthur caressed the dark head before taking the halter off and closing the stall up.

Then outside again for the next horse: “The big brute’s Victoria.” Well she really was big, almost all white, but looked much gentler than Ash. “She was my first horse, even before I met him. Poor ol’ girl’s seen some stuff.”

Next horse; the pony: “She’s prob’ly the most expensive horse we got on ‘ere. Lily’s competition horse: Princess. And she lives up to the name.” Chloe got the sense that she was a spoiled little thing with a bit of a temper. She looked the part.

Up next the horse that came and greeted Chloe as she jumped out of the car: “Morrowind-”

“Wait. Like the game?” Max asked.

“Was Sean’s idea.” Who the hell was Sean? “Made Sebastian play The Elder Scrolls, but we couldn’t name‘er Skyrim.”

Max snorted: “Well why not?”

“Well you try riding a Mustang named Skyrim.”

“Woah, A Mustang? Like a wild horse?”

“Yeah, got her from the Bureau of Land Management. ‘bout last June I think. And the one left in the pasture’s Whitehide; also from the Bureau.”

 They still played that board game with Lily upon re-entering the house, up until the little girl more or less fell asleep in Max’s lap. She was to sleep with the dad.

And Chloe was to go downstairs. Spare room. And that’s exactly what it looked like: all filled up with trinkets and older stuff and... workout equipment. But there she goes, sneaking by the heavy machinery and under the yellow blanket of the bed there, trying to find a pose that felt nice. Head up, nope, on the side, still nope, on the belly, arms dangling from the side- wait what’s that.

Square, plastic, but paper thin- cigarettes.

Chloe sat straight up. Men smoked. Oh yes, yes, yes. She pulled one out and lit it up; she still got the lighter with her. Cranked up the window as well. Oh how she missed these. She could of used some of these this entire week, damn.

Yeah today wasn’t so bad. Today wasn’t bad at all.

She got no place to go. Maybe she can ask of them to stay here. She’d like to.

 She woke up to the soft strumming of a guitar. She thought it was a dream, but no, someone was actually playing the guitar; out on the porch. Baby gurgling. She got up to peek out the window; she could understand the lyrics now:

“Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be cowboys- Don’t let’em play guitars and ride’em old trucks-”

The front door swung open as Arthur got out with the bags he got out yesterday. They still had a holiday... and her and Max still needed to reach Seattle.

“Should I wake ‘em up? Don’t wanna drag the kids to Seattle. Isaac’s been awake-” a sigh. And for a moment Chloe felt like an intruder in this house.

“Let them sleep, Arthur, they had a rough day yesterday.”

Chloe watched the man seat down by his guitar-baby-holding husband, arm wrapping around the shoulders.

“Guess just anxious. Girls’ been through lot... barely survivin’ that tornado in Arcadia. That Chloe lost her family back there...” a sigh.

“We’re gonna get them to Max’s parents in Seattle. It’s gonna be fine.”

Chloe’s hands shook on the window sill. A huff. She went back to the cigarette pack she hid under the bed. She didn’t dare open up the window again.

Two cigarettes.

She heard someone come downstairs, thought it was Max so she opened up the door.

“Mornin’!” it was Arthur, grand smile on his lips.

Then a wheezed breath and a cough.

Oh shit...

Another cough.

“Can... Can you open up a window, Chloe.” And another cough. “Please.”

She rused to do so; clumsy hands didn’t do a good job at it, but she tried... Arthur leaned over towards the window, taking in some really deep breaths. She could hear Sebastian coming in from outside too.

“E-everything alright?” she dared ask; the coughing seemed to be gone.

“Yeah...” A drawn out inhale that sounded loaded with mucus, followed by a spit out the window. “I’ll be a’right...” A scratch of the beard.

Sebastian let Isaac roam the room:

“You smoked in here?” scolding.

“I...”

“Buck-” Arthur held his husband back. “It’s a’right. He ain’t known.”

The scowl that covered Sebastian’s face mellowed: “Go get some fresh air.”

Some more dried up coughs while trying to get the words out: “Will do. Gotta feed the horses.” And the man stumbled out.

“I’m sorry. I’m... I’m so so so sorry.” Chloe tried.

“Those were my cigarettes, right?” Sebastian cut her up.

“What?”

“The ones under the bed...”

“Yeah... I shouldn’t have-”

Sebastian listened, bobbed his head. “Help me open up the windows.”

And that they did; the man took the remaining packet and thre it in the bin. There was a story behind that... and Chloe’s not sure if she wants to know it. Dude’s all snappy because of it now. But once Max’s awake, they fix themselves some breakfast and set out to Seattle. It’s a few hour’s drive, depending on traffic.

 “Max...” They’re almost there, the skyscrapers breaking the horizon line with their ‘magnificence’. “I don’t think I can stay with your parents.”

“You know they won’t be mad at you for what happened.”

“I know, I know...”

“You’re not a burden, Chloe, okay?”

“It’s not that...” she snapped back. Sebastian gazed at them in the rearview mirror.

Silence.

“Is... Urhm, Sebastian... Do you think I can make it up to you? I...” This was so selfish of her, but she can’t help it: “I’ll stay just a few more days until I can make enough money to afford a place. I’m-”

“You’re always welcome at our place.”

“What?- Wait. Really?...”

“You need a place to stay, of course.”

  Safe to say she might have gotten adopted by fairy husbands. Oh, did she mention they were badass detectives too?

[artificialqueens]

Overpowered Part 2(Branjie)- athena2

Chapter 2 is here and the angst train is getting rolling. I want to thank all of you for the amazing feedback on the first chapter. Your comments really made my happy and I appreciate each one of them. It would be great if you could leave some for this chapter too! ***This chapter does have mentions of anxiety, mild violence, and mentions of self-destructive behavior. Please be cautious.***

“Hold up! What the hell you mean I was dead?”

“Vanessa,” Silk warns.

“Don’t ‘Vanessa’ me! You want to just have a meeting after Professor fucking Trelawney here told me I’m gonna die!?”

She slams her fist on the table and faintly registers Brooke jumping at the noise–she makes a note to apologize later–and turns to Yvie. “What. Did. You. See?” She forces out through clenched teeth.

Yvie pales. “I saw a clock tower by a cemetery.”

“That fucking fits,” Vanessa snarls, her nose almost touching Yvie’s.

“The clock was cracked. It was stuck at 11:03. There was snow on the ground. Your hair was up–that’s why I didn’t realize it was you at first. Brooke’s face was bleeding and she was holding you. That’s all I saw.”

“How’d you know I was dead?”

“I can’t explain it, but I know. It’s a feeling I get.”

“You can’t see more?” Vanessa demands.

“It doesn’t work like that,” Yvie retreats with a sigh. “I get them randomly, I can’t control it. Usually I don’t even know what I’m seeing.”

Her hands curl into fists, heat pulsing in her fingertips.

“Can we avoid it?” Silk cuts in. “Or is it inevitable?”

“Well, they always happen, but sometimes not how I expect. Like, one time I saw a guy bleeding, but he was attacking someone. He was the bad guy. They’re not always what they seem. Maybe we can save you, or-”

“Me being dead seems like me being dead!”

“If you’re done yelling, you might want to take care of your girlfriend,” Scarlet interrupts coolly.

She suddenly notices the unmistakable sound of someone throwing up. Brooke is hunched over the garbage while A’Keria rubs her back. She straightens up and walks out, whole body shaking.

Shit.

“I-I’m sorry,” she says to Yvie, rubbing her eyes. “Gimme a minute.”

She sprints into the hall and is greeted by a hole in the wall flecked with red. Brooke’s head is in her hands, the knuckles on her right hand already light purple and bleeding.

“Brooke,” she whispers. Brooke looks up and Vanessa’s heart breaks at her red eyes and the tears spilling down her cheeks. Her breaths are quick and shallow.

“Baby,” she breathes, wiping Brooke’s tears with her thumb.

“I don’t want you to die!” Brooke sobs, sounding like a wounded animal.

“Hey, shh, it’s okay. Breathe, Brooke.” She puts on her brave voice, not sure who it’s for. “You heard Yvie. There might be a way around this. I ain’t going down without a fight. It’ll take more than that to get rid of me. I’m like a damn cockroach.”

Brooke smiles weakly but the tears are still flowing, and Vanessa holds her and pets her hair. Her own tears well up but don’t fall.

She whispers that it’s okay as Brooke’s trembling eases and her ragged breathing steadies.

If only she believed it. —

They get Brooke’s hand bandaged and Vanessa almost wishes she could wrap herself in a bandage, like a cocoon, and never come out.

“Do you need anything?” Brooke asks once they’re home. Vanessa truly can’t figure out what she needs.

“I’m going for a walk,” she says.

Brooke nods wearily. Vanessa hears a choked scream and something shattering after she leaves.

The sky is gray. She can feel the rain coming but keeps walking, leaves crunching as she stomps down the sidewalk, feet carrying her to her mother’s grave. Not that there had been anything to bury after the fire.

There’d be snow on the ground. The snow was usually gone around March. Did she really have less than six months? Did she really survive the fire, survive everything the past few years, to be denied seeing spring flowers poke through the ground?

No. Her throat is tight and she refuses to think about it. She’s cheated death once. She can do it again.

Thunder cracks like the sky has split in two. Raindrops pound against the earth, everything awash in gray.

Pouring rain while she cries in a cemetery. What a fucking cliché. Within seconds she’s soaked, but she doesn’t move. She stands there until her clothes are heavy and dripping and she can’t tell if the wetness on her face is from tears or raindrops.

She has no idea how much time passes, rain chilling her bones, teeth chattering, when suddenly a too-big coat is draped around her shoulders. She looks up and sees Brooke, T-shirt clinging to her shivering skin, hair drenched. Her eyes are redder than before and Vanessa figures she must have cried the entire time she was gone. Vanessa can just discern Bertha parked behind her.

“You drove here? Brooke, you’re afraid to drive.”

“I had to come get you.”

Vanessa slams her face against Brooke’s chest and cries as the rain beats down, her life one cliché after another. Brooke’s arms are so strong and secure it feels like Yvie’s vision isn’t a possibility. Like nothing could ever hurt her.

Brooke drives her home, white-knuckled grip on the wheel, worry shining in her eyes. Vanessa won’t let go of Brooke’s coat; not as she shuffles past tiny beads of broken glass from whatever Brooke smashed on the floor, not as Brooke puts her into warm pajamas and tucks her into bed. The lavender scent fills her as she drifts off. —

Two days later Vanessa wakes up thinking Yvie’s vision might be better than her stuffy head and burning nose.

Brooke rolls over and coughs harshly. “Ness, I think something’s wrong with me,” she says fearfully.

Vanessa feels a tiny stab of guilt, but at least there’s someone to be sick and miserable with her.

“We’re sick, Brooke,” she rasps, throat desert-dry. “That’s the last time I dramatically cry in the rain.”

She hears a key clicking in the lock, muffled cursing as something clatters against the door.

“Do you think someone’s coming to kill us?” Brooke sneezes twice and fumbles for tissues on the nightstand.

“If they are I might let them,” Vanessa groans, burying her face in the pillow to smother her pounding headache.

“Your savior has arrived,” A’Keria chirps in the doorway, bags hanging off her arm. “I knew you two were getting sick.”

A’Keria unloads a pharmacy’s worth of tissues, orange juice, and pills. She gives them cold medicine and steaming bowls of chicken soup. Brooke seems shocked to have someone taking care of her when she’s sick, and Vanessa tries not to think about that, not sure her body can hold any more anger toward the lab.

They huddle in bed and watch Schitt’s Creek, and Brooke falls asleep with her head on Vanessa’s shoulder, and aside from feeling like shit, it’s kind of nice.

Vanessa hopes the nice days aren’t numbered. —

Despite the ticking clock above her head, the next few weeks just…pass by. Like nothing is wrong. It’s mostly because Vanessa won’t acknowledge it. She has plenty of practice burying problems. (They have until it snows. It’s fine. She’s fine).

She’s never backed down from a fight. She liked the thrill, the energy. The problem is, there’s nothing to fight. There’s no villain, no secret lab. She can’t fight her way out, and that might be the scariest part.

She patches things up with Yvie and Scarlet. (If you blow this I will kick you to the curb, Silk had threatened). Luckily they weren’t upset after the meeting, and, inspired by A’Keria’s 5-star “Bitch can bake” review of Brooke’s cooking, they’re part of the Sunday brunch crew.

And Brooke. She sees Nina constantly. She apologizes over and over for the glasses she broke that first day, throws herself into training with Scarlet and Yvie. She nods off during their mostly-uneaten dinner twice in one week.

Vanessa’s not doing much better, despite the lies she tells. It’s like she’s fracturing into different Vanessas, slowly losing the real one. Practical Vanessa does research with Silk and Yvie, reviewing the vision, brainstorming plans. Avoidant Vanessa wants to hole up in bed and never leave. Normal Vanessa doesn’t quite work, as she finds herself desperately clinging to each kiss, each laugh, even each Trader Joe’s run, wondering if it’s the last.

And the Vanessa that’s slowly overpowering the others. Reckless Vanessa, the Vanessa that has decided she’s basically immortal until the snow flies, that destroys speed limits without her seatbelt and takes on dangerous criminals without backup or ear comm. The Vanessa that is daring Yvie’s vision to be wrong by acting in ways she knows full well can get her killed.

She should talk to Nina, talk to someone. But she can’t. She can’t watch Nina’s overly-kind face say her feelings are valid and it’s expected for her to act out but she should cope in a healthier way. (Her coping methods could be worse. She hasn’t even touched her liquor cabinet, though she gazed longingly yesterday). Besides, right now, she can pretend it’s not real. It’s just an image that’s months away. But if she talks about it, it’s a real problem. A problem she has to admit she is helpless against.

“We can talk about it if you want,” Brooke offers one night.

She refuses. —-

“I’m going on patrol,” Vanjie states firmly.

“But Scarlet and Yvie are out-“

“I’m going.”

“I’ll come with you-“

“No. You should stay. Get some sleep, you look exhausted. Don’t wait up or anything.”

Cold winds hits her face. She uses her police scanner and sticks to the streets, and for 4 hours she is in total control, each punch, kick, and smack letting her fight the fact that she can’t fight what’s coming.

She gets home at 3am and finds Brooke half-asleep on the couch, baking show on TV and mug of hot chocolate on the coffee table long since turned cold.

She can’t help but feel that a crack is forming between them.

And she’s holding the chisel. —

“I’ve been thinking…”

“Yeah?” Vanessa cuts her chicken so it looks like she’s eaten.

“I might ask Nina about the anxiety meds.”

“That’s a big step for you,” she says gently.

“Yeah. It’s just…I feel…I feel like I’m always waiting for something bad to happen. And I’m so tired but my brain can’t quiet down, and the flashbacks and panic attacks are getting worse and I just…it’s a lot,” she finishes quietly, head down, and Vanessa sees how deep the bags under her eyes are.

Guilt floods her. She’s noticed Brooke’s body tight like a coiled spring lately, but she’s been too wrapped up in everything to see it was getting that bad, that Brooke was suffering so much. “I’m sorry, baby. I should have known you haven’t been doing so well.”

“Don’t apologize. You have to focus on yourself too.”

“Still,” Vanessa insists. “So, meds, huh? You know there’s no shame in asking for help,” she says, sensing Brooke’s apprehension.

“I know. But I…I’m still kinda scared to take them. The lab never–it was bad to take anything besides what they gave me, and I’m afraid the meds will make me feel like theirs did…”

Sometimes Vanessa doesn’t think she can hate the lab more than she does. Then she hears this and wishes she could have personally ended everyone that worked there. “Brooke, you’re not bad for taking them, okay? The meds won’t be like the lab’s. They’ll make you feel better.”

“Okay.”

She still hasn’t brought the prescription home. —

They have their first group patrol, Scarlet in a deep red suit with gold piping and a gold double-S and Yvie in bright green with a purple eyeball, all of them with reinforced ear comms to protect against Scarlet’s screams. They follow Silk’s call to a street cracked down the center, pavement warped and crumbled like a giant stomped on the road.

“It’s like an earthquake,” Vanjie mutters.

“Does anyone hear crying?” Scarlet asks.

Vanjie hears faint wailing down the street, where a black car is upside down. “Shit, there’s a kid.”

The parents are unconscious and Vanjie doesn’t want to risk moving them. The girl is maybe four, screaming her little lungs out.

“Third Eye-”

“Yvie!”

“Whatever, call an ambulance,” Vanjie commands. “Frost, Scarlet, hold the car steady.”

She rips the door off and chucks it on the sidewalk. The girl’s cries pierce her ears. “I’m gonna help you,” she whispers as she undoes the car seat buckle and catches the girl.

“You’re alright.” Vanjie sets her down. She reaches for the emergency candy in her belt and hands her a chocolate bar, which she munches happily.

“She’s bleeding,” Frost notes, pointing to a cut on her forehead.

“Paramedics are coming. A doctor can check her,” Yvie tells them.

The girl squirms in fear. Vanjie scrapes her brain for any remnants of her brief and unsuccessful babysitting career as a 16-year-old. She’s prepared to comfort her like she comforts Brooke, minus the kisses, when the girl cries for her mommy and Vanjie freezes. How can she compare to a mom? What if she makes things worse?

Another small voice, one she ignores, rings in her head: I want my mom too.

Frost drops down on one knee. “Doctors can be scary, huh?” She asks softly.

The girl nods passionately.

“I get scared of them too.”

“But you’re a superhero!” She exclaims in surprise, tears slowing.

“I know. Even superheroes get scared. But you know what? Whenever I go to the doctor, my friend Vanjie stays with me, and it’s not so scary. And I-I’ll stay with you now, and it won’t be scary. Okay?”

The girl nods as the ambulance pulls up. Frost stands beside the stretcher while the EMT’s bandage her forehead, tells her she’s so brave, and Vanjie melts at the exchange. She finds herself dreaming of a future for them–a future with a cozy little house and the animals at their feet, without secret labs and death visions looming over their heads.

“I think this was someone with powers. There’s no damage anywhere else,” Silk reasons in her ear, cutting through the fantasy. “There’s a break-in at a warehouse two blocks over. Could be the same person.”

“Ready?” Yvie asks.

“Ready,” Vanjie answers, and they take off, meeting an old industrial warehouse, windows boarded up, paint peeling and grimy.

“It looks abandoned,” Frost observes. “Why would someone break in?”

“Guess we’ll find out.” Vanjie leads them through the rusty door.

The inside is clearly not abandoned. There’s shiny lab tables covered with vials and chemicals, armchairs against one wall, and a fridge in the corner.

They’ve barely entered when the door slams shut. Vanjie pulls with all her strength, but it doesn’t budge.

Her fire, Frost’s ice, and Scarlet’s sonic-screams all bounce off harmlessly. They try to reach Silk and receive crackling static.

“We’re stuck,” Yvie states plainly.

“No shit, Sherlock!” Vanjie snaps. “Funny you couldn’t see us getting stuck but you got no trouble seeing me die!”

“For the thousandth time, it doesn’t work like that!”

“How long before Silk realizes something’s up and comes to get us?” Vanjie shifts gears.

“Time is a construct.”

“Fuck off, Yvie!” Vanjie and Scarlet bark together.

“This was a trap,” Yvie replies calmly.

“Again, no shit.”

“No, think about it. Comms blocked? The walls being fire and ice and Scarlet-proof? They wanted us specifically.”

“Who, though?” Vanjie softens. “And why us?”

There’s light tapping on her shoulder. She spins around to see Frost, sweat beading on her forehead. “Windows,” she says quietly.

“Windows!” She exclaims in realization. “Alright,” Vanjie waves the others over. “The windows are boarded up. We can break through, we just need a way up.”

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” a voice says suddenly.

Two men appear out of the shadows, one in bright yellow, one in muddy brown.

“Who the hell are you?” Vanjie demands. “You got some ugly-ass costumes. You look like a damn banana.”

“Call me Shockwave,” the man in yellow says.

“Quake,” replies the man in brown.

“Am I supposed to know you and your cheesy as hell names?” If she distracts them long enough, the others can escape.

“You don’t, but she does,” Quake jabs at Frost.

Vanjie does not like where this is going.

Frost’s head snaps up. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“Well, maybe I misspoke. Precious little Frost wasn’t allowed to see us.”

“I’m surprised you’re still functioning,” Shockwave taunts. “I thought your brain would be mush by now. That’s what happened to the one before you. The General put her out of her misery. But I think we’ll have some fun with you,” he sneers. He rushes at Frost, whipping out a knife and holding it against her throat as she quivers.

“If you hurt her…if you even touch her, I swear to God I’ll kill you,” Vanjie feels the heat rising, hands erupting into flame.

“Anybody moves, your girlfriend gets it,” Shockwave threatens. The flames die out.

“I-I don’t-” Frost starts.

“You don’t know us, but we know you,” Quake says. “We made the drugs that made you. We spent years on them. Then the General stole our ideas and used them on you and his other pets. We never got any credit. It all went to you. And you didn’t even deserve it.”

It hits Vanjie like a truck. Two scientists that made drugs at the lab. Two missing employees from last month. But it can’t be. They’re dead, Silk had proof–

“But guess what?” Shockwave tosses the knife away and shoves Frost to the ground. “You’re not the only one with powers now.”

Circuits of lightning buzz around his hands. He forms the crackling tendrils into a ball and aims it at Frost, who hasn’t moved. She has that blank, far-away look in her eyes that still scares Vanjie no matter how many times she sees it. She’s trapped in her mind, and Vanjie can’t get her out.

She won’t even know it’s coming.

Shockwave rears his arm back and she launches a fireball. It distracts him enough for Yvie to lunge at him and Scarlet to go after Quake, the noises faint and distant as Vanjie rushes toward Frost.

There is no recognition or awareness in the green eyes. All she can do is wait for Frost—Brooke, really—to come back to her. She moves Frost into her lap and takes her hand, ice-cold and clammy, forcing down the fear as the seconds tick by and the fight rages on.

Frost bolts up, head whipping around wildly.

“You’re okay,” Vanjie soothes quickly. “I’m here.” She helps Frost control her breathing. She squeezes her hand tighter, feels her pulse slow.

“They escaped through the back and we lost them,” Scarlet mutters, appearing from a corner of the warehouse. Her lip is bleeding but she’s fussing over Yvie, who looks unharmed and swats her worried hands away.

Their concerned gazes burn into her, and she shifts to cover Frost better. They don’t know what happened to her and Vanjie plans to keep it that way.

The door flies open with a clang. Silk stands in the doorway, bolt-cutters in hand.

“Get in the car,” she barks.

Vanjie helps Frost into the car, allowing herself a sigh of relief once they’re speeding away. But she knows the relief won’t last.

A storm is coming. —

It’s a quiet night. They’ve hardly said two words since Silk’s call that Shockwave and Quake match the descriptions of the two supposedly dead employees, and Brooke’s voice is hoarse when it tickles Vanessa’s ear.

“Vanessa?”

“Yeah?”

“I think I’m ready to read my file.”

[siriuslycollins-blog]

Parenting 101 For Rockstar Dads

CH. 3- The One Where Everything Is Not Okay Pt 1

Warnings: medical malpractice, child birth, loss of blood, and death

Nessa’s pregnancy wore on throughout the fall and into the winter and spring. Jared and Nessa were having a girl and they had settled on the name Kaela, Kaela Dominique Leto; a lot had changed from the time of the pregnancy announcement such as Jared and Nessa turning the second bedroom of their apartment they used for storage into a nursery, Jared’s older brother Shannon crashing on their couch and Nessa being officially on maternity leave from school and work. She hated it, and with Jared and Shannon at work, she was absolutely bored. With summer in full swing, it was way too hot to do anything, and Nessa had very little energy. Her days consisted (sometimes) making breakfast for herself, Jared and Shannon, watching soap operas as she painted or knitted, fetching the mail, and concluding the day with a treat from the ice cream truck.

Jackie would come by after work or practice to keep her company until the guys came home. One Monday evening, she had stopped by after dance practice while Jared and Shannon were out at the laundromat. “Oh Nessa, I swear on everything I love, I’ll beat the fuck out of Lisa Russell! She gettin’ on my last damn nerve,” Jackie vented. When Nessa announced her pregnancy to the SUSLA dance team, her backup, Lisa had taken her place. It should’ve been a surprise that Lisa had even made the team in the first place, seeing as she couldn’t dance for shit, but she had rich parents, so it wasn’t really.

“The other girls are threatening to quit the team until you come back.” Nessa listened as her best friend cursed Lisa to the high heaven, never once losing steam until Shannon walked in carrying his laundry basket. The two of them were definitely checking each other out, until Jared bumped into him. “Dude, you gotta move. These mosquitos are eating me alive.” Ever since Shannon moved in, Jackie always hung around longer than necessary, and they were getting especially close.

Nessa liked the idea of Kaela’s godmother and uncle growing closer, but Jackie has a boyfriend who is absolutely wonderful, and for that reason, she only hoped that they were only getting to know each other because of the baby. Shannon plopped down in between them and threw an arm around Jackie’s side of the couch. “That’s cool, it’s not like I’m carrying your niece or anything.” They completely ignored her as they launched into their conversation; no matter how many times Jared and Nessa tried to include themselves in the conversation, Shannon and Jackie always managed to drift back to their own world. Jackie ended up staying for dinner, and the only time she and Shannon stopped talking was when either of them took a bite of their pizza.

“So Jackie, how’s Will doin’?” Nessa asked; she briefly wondered if her friend forgot that she even had a boyfriend. “Oh! Uh... he’s okay. Just really busy with summer practices so I haven’t been seeing him much lately.” Nessa saw the disappointed look on Shannon’s face but he still asked, “who’s Will?” “Just a guy she’s been seeing for a while.” He didn’t say anything after that, and the rest of dinner was quiet and a bit awkward. 

Jackie let at almost eight o’clock, saying she had to get up early, which was a lie, and even after she left Shannon was still quiet. “Shan, are you okay?” Jared asked his brother carefully. “What? Yeah, I’ll be fine, I’m just tired. I just want to go to bed. Had a long day.” Nessa and Jared went in the back to their bedroom and got ready for bed. “See Jared! I told you he has a thing for her! And she definitely likes him too!”

“Nessa baby, we’ve been through this. Shan and Jackie are going to be Kaela’s godparents. Of course they’re getting close.” Nessa only rolled her eyes as she put her hair up and put on her bonnet. “You saw how upset he was when I brought up Will.” She wasn’t even sure if Jackie even liked Will the way he liked her as she always seemed annoyed by him. “Let’s just go to sleep. You have your last doctor’s appointment before Kaela comes, first thing in the morning.”

Nessa still couldn’t believe that she was going to be a mom, that she was going to bring a child into the world with the love of her life; absolutely mind boggling. Everything was ready for her, the crib assembled and filled with stuffed animals and other things she might need, and a closet filled with pink outfits. She went into labor on July 13th, at 5:30 am which threw Jared and Shannon into a frenzy. They were both running around like chickens with their heads cut off as they made last minute plans; Shannon grabbing the hospital bag and putting in more things that might be needed and starting the car while Jared called everyone he knew. Turns out that Kaela was a very impatient baby, and by the time they made it to the hospital, Nessa was just about ready to push.

Finally, at 7:30 a.m. Kaela Dominique Leto made her grand entrance, weighing in at four pounds even. She had brown skin, a head of dark curls and the biggest brown eyes Jared had ever seen, and for the second time in his life, he fell in love. The placenta was delivered soon after, and that’s when everything went to hell. Nessa’s regular doctor was out of town due to a family emergency, so her replacement was a balding white man in fifties who brushed off Nessa’s concerns about bleeding after delivering the placenta. “Don’t worry Miss Arceneaux, the bleeding will stop soon.” The doctor had the nurses put some gauze to stop the blood flow but Nessa was losing her color and energy, fast. Jared was getting pissed; clearly there was something wrong with his girlfriend. Why wasn’t the doctor taking this seriously?

“Dr. Archibald, there is something wrong with her! Do something!” By this time Constance and Jackie had made it to the room, only to see Shannon holding Jared back as he was yelling at the doctor with Nessa running a finger over Kaela’s soft cheek; neither women had ever seen Nessa look like this. Of course it was normal to not look your best after giving birth, but it looked like someone had dimmed the lights from within. Nessa gave them a weak smile and they slowly walked over to her. Shannon had escorted Jared and Dr. Archibald into the hall, closing the door so the women wouldn’t have to hear it.

“Nessa, she’s absolutely beautiful,” Constance whispered. She couldn’t believe that she was a grandmother, but here she was, holding her new granddaughter Kaela. Surely this had to be a dream; she and Jackie took turns holding the baby, and it was a while before Shannon and Jared came back. They had plastic bags of food and they sat them down on the rolling table. “Nessa baby, you need to eat something, get your strength back up,” Jared told her.

Eating seemed to do something good for her, and her blood pressure seemed to return to normal after drinking a few ounces of orange juice. Nessa’s family came later in the day to fawn over the baby while Jared went to see about a birth certificate; when he came back, his eyes were red, he looked tired and a piece of paper in his hand. Jared looked over and saw his daughter in one of those makeshift cribs, sleeping peacefully. “Jay, why are you crying? Everything is fine. I’m okay,” Nessa assured him. He wiped the remaining tears away with the back of his hand and began kissing her face. 

“I thought I almost lost you Nessa. It was horrible.” Jared was shaken to his core, and the thought of losing the love of his life scared the shit out of him; he wanted to live out the rest of his life with her. Which reminded him... he still had the ring in his pocket, a ring he’s had for months. Of course the two had never talked about marriage, Jared had been too chicken to bring it up, but now that their daughter was here, now was a perfect time. “You’re not gonna lose me Jay.”

Jared felt like crying again, but his eyes were sore and he didn’t know if he could produce more tears; he felt like he’d done enough crying to last him twenty years. “Nessa, it was bad, and that doctor, I wanted to fucking punch him.” He could feel his throat close up again, and he focused on Shannon holding Kaela, with Jackie begging for a turn again. “It’s my turn Shannon. You’ve had her for ten minutes already.” Constance, Jared and Nessa had to step in to get the two to stop bickering.

“Come on you two, knock it off! She’s only three hours old and these are not the first sounds she should be hearing!” Constance’s tone was enough to make Shannon be quiet after Jackie called him a name. “Shan, Jackie’s right, you’ve had your turn. Give the baby to her.” He settled his niece in Jackie’s arms who had the biggest smile on her face. A few hours later, everyone had to go back to work, except for Jared who had some time off, so now he and Nessa finally had time to themselves to admire their daughter alone. 

The new parents couldn’t believe that their baby was real, they were actually looking at her, and yet it still felt like they could wake up at any moment. Kaela was, without a doubt the most perfect baby in the world; as Jared watched over his sleeping daughter, he felt a flash of anger. Here he is, holding this miracle he helped create, the thought of leaving her behind too painful to even fathom, and yet Tony Bryant had no problem leaving his two boys behind. He looked over at Nessa, who was staring at him holding Kaela. She looked tired, tired but happy, and Jared knew that now was the perfect time to ask her to spend the res of her life with him.

“Nessa, I love you so much, I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I won’t question it.” He sat Kaela back down in her cradle thing so he could get the ring from his pocket, and when Nessa realized what he was doing, she gasped. “Jared, are you doing what I think you’re doing?” Jared didn’t answer her, instead getting down on one knee at the side of her bed. “Vanessa Dominique Arceneaux, will you marry me?” 

Nessa had a smile on her face, the kind of smile that reached the eyes. “Of course I’ll marry you! I love you so much!” Jared slipped the ring on her finger, and they kissed as Kaela made some noises in her cradle. “Yes, pretty girl, your momma and daddy are getting married,” Jared cooed at the newborn. Jared didn’t expect that their celebration would abruptly end.

Nessa died two days later in her sleep sometime in the early morning. Jared was awoken by the heart monitor flatlining, thinking it was his alarm clock back home before he remembered where he was. It was dark in the room, the curtains drawn and the only light in the room was the monitor and the little sliver of golden light under the door coming from hall. Jared leaped from the couch and into the hallway. “Nurse, nurse! I need a nurse!” The monitor had to be wrong, she was only sleeping...

Doctors and nurses began to rush into the room and Jared was quickly jostled about as they tried to get to her; it took two security guards and a male nurse to calm him down, to assure him that they were doing everything they could to revive her. He was dragged into the waiting area kicking and screaming and crying. He tried to take his mind off what was happening by pacing the floor, listening to the early morning news, but none of that was helping. It was another fifteen minutes before a nurse came into the waiting area to tell him the news, but she didn’t need to, he could see it on her face.

“I’m so sorry Mr. Leto. We tried everything we could. There was one time where we tried the paddles and it worked, but only for a second.” Jared could feel the hot tears streaming down his face and he dropped back into a chair, bending over and grabbing his head, then rocking back and forth. He knew that he should go back in and say goodbye to Nessa but he couldn’t, it would be too real, but his feet moved on their own accord. There she was, his new fiancée lying on her back, eyes closed as if she was sleeping peacefully. Jared grabbed the hand he put the ring on, squeezing it and he just cried.

taglist: @llfd1977 @blackreaders-assemble @itsmeauntie

[andreburakovsky]

i was tagged by @bnebishop !!!! thanks for the tag boo 💓

1. who is your idol(s)?

- i really don’t have an idol....i guess the closest i could think of is someone i look up to and that’s my senior english teacher. she had been through so much and still was the kindest woman i’ve ever known 🤧

2. if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?

- one of my best friends lives in germany and she takes like weekend trips to spain and paris so like it would be so cool to visit her and go to some other european countries together

3. what decorates the walls of your room?

- RIGHT NOW all i have is a mirror and my tv lmao but i just moved rooms so we’re getting there

4. favorite color combination?

- yellow and gray!!!! orrrr pink and gold or like pink and anything.

5. what’s on top of your bucket list?

- i just want to travel as much as possible

6. height?

- 5′2. im baby

7. favorite animal?

- penguins forever

8. what’s the last song you listened to?

- weightless by all time low

9. how many/what kind of pets do you have?

- i don’t have any rn but i want a puppy sooo bad :(

10. last movie you saw in theatres?

- i saw the goldfinch. it was long af and kinda slow but it wasn’t bad. good ending

11. comfort food or favorite food?

- i’m a slut for sweets ESPECIALLY cake/cupcakes. or chocolate chip cookies

12. why did the chicken cross the road?

- he had places to be and people to see

13. book you’re currently reading?

- i haven’t read for funsies since like 2012 djdjdkekx

14. your favorite season and three things you like about it?

- sooo i live in tennessee so we really only get ab 5 days of these seasons for real bc the rest of the time these seasons are either really hot or really cold but when the weather is how it’s supposed to be then spring and fall.

15. you are about to get into a fight, what song comes on as your soundtrack?

- probably some pop punk bullshit like empty space by the story so far or something shdjdkdksx

16. (+1) if you won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you would buy yourself?

- pay off my car, buy a new computer bc mine’s FUCKED, pay for my tuition for the next two years when i go to a university. with what’s left i would probably just buy clothes and food lmao

17. (+1) what fictional world would you want to live in?

- riverdale. the drama.....

18. (+1) if you had to learn a completely new language, what would it be?

- spanish or french

19. (+1) do you wear socks in bed?

- if you do then unfollow me

20. (+1) if you could only choose one celebrity or athlete to make out with who would it be?

- JALEN HURD. i’m sorry hockey boys but jalen has been it for so long

21. (+1) if you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life what would it be?

- game over man. it’s the dumbest fucking movie but it’s so funny to me nobody else probably thinks so but

(okay i’m not sure what the +1 thing is but I THINK it’s people adding a question for whoever’s next??? idk but i’ll do that......bc i think that’s what i’m supposed to do)

22. (+1) who’s your favorite player/celebrity and whats your favorite thing ab them?

i’m gonna tag @trevormoore @babevillier @pksuburban @poppuck @jtscompher if you’ve already been tagged or don’t want to then just ignore me hehe

[harleyshahas]

You know, I'm 30 years old, I have a house, a kid, I pay taxes, and I'm engaged. I work full time overnight 3-4 days a week for 12 hour shifts. My fiance is the same. We each work opposite ends of the week so one of us can be home with our son. By the end of either of our work weeks we are exhausted, mentally and physically. Two days out of our week we each get maybe 5 hours of sleep when one gets home from work so that they may be able to take over watching the tot for the start of the weekend. We clean when we can.

I don't have a bad relationship with my parents. My stepmom is pretty patient and understanding and I have a pretty good relationship with her, I can talk to her about things easy enough. My mom... while we get along and I love her, I feel our relationship is a little more strained. She has a tendency to raise her voice as she speaks without realizing and she gets progressively more short as a conversation goes on. She has to be taken in stride. She is by no means a bad mom.

However, she has a tendency to nag.

"Oh your feeding [my kid] chicken nuggets? You need to cook more, you can't always feed him that."

"You need to clean out your car. You need to vacuum/sweep/mop. You need to clean the bathroom. Do the dishes. Wipe down the cabinets. Clean the windows. Your mirrors are disgusting. How much laundry do you have?Your yard is starting to look a little rough." Its like I'm still living with them. 😮‍💨

I have a 1 year old toddler, a dog, a cat, and two step kids. I work 12 hours overnight. I get very little sleep already from from depression, undiagnosed BP, and insomnia. We've only been in our new house for a year, and my fiance have been slowly rebuilding our lives from previous financial drains before we managed to get where we are. And where we are is pretty good now.

Every now and again I hear an "I'm proud of you" from my mom but those feel so few and far between. Even my stepmom dishes out praise pretty sparingly. Normally I can ignore the nagging, take a deep breath, and let it roll off me. It's something I'm used to. But lately it feels like it's too much. Every time I see them or talk to her on the phone it's always something. "Have you taken care of this thing yet?"

She called not too long ago and it happened again. I mentioned that my back hurt and I was exhausted because I've been up since 6am (it's almost 9pm now) with the baby and instead of napping like I would have normally when I laid him down for his nap, I decided 'Hey, I feel like cleaning. There's a pile of laundry that needs to be folded on the kitchen table, there's more in one of our six baskets, I have three more loads I gotta do. The floor is sticky from Damian's grubby little hands and needs to be swept anyway. And I might as well vacuum, my parents are coming over tomorrow and the dog's been shedding like crazy. Might as well.' So I opened the windows and got to work. I was feeling pretty accomplished.

So I mentioned I was hurting and tired, and I have to give Damian a bath as soon as I'm done typing this, and I still have even more laundry to go thru, which I'm gonna put off now cuz I'm not in the mood. So I told my mother I gave the house a good deep clean cuz it needed it, spring cleaning and all that. And she says.

"Good, your house needed it."

I... I know? I just said that?

"What you really need to do is clean your baseboards. The ones in your bathroom are looking rough."

I... what?

"Did you notice I cleaned your cabinets last time I was over? They needed a good wipe down."

No. No I didn't. You know why? Because I have a dog, a cat, and a 1 year old who all like to put their grubby little mitts all over everything and those cabinets you wiped down with a wet cloth got dirty again the next day. I don't care about the fucking cabinets.

Is it so wrong to fish for a little praise? My house is very well kept, the worse it gets is baby toys all over the living room and we do our best to pick those up when they get to be too much. There's miscellaneous nicknacks on the kitchen table and counters we're still trying to figure out where to put them. We keep a very nice house and I'm proud of it. We've come a long way.

Every now and then my parents tell me their proud. But a majority of the time it's nagging and this time it just hit a little harder than normal, probably because mother's day is coming up. It'll be my second one for myself and I have two moms to think about. Maybe I want to be excited for it.

Kinda hard to do that when I'm fucking annoyed.

Part of why I cleaned so much today is because I know they're coming over tomorrow and I'm trying to limit the amount of nagging I'm gonna hear. But I shouldn't have to do that. And it pisses me off that I feel I have to. Because I know they're just gonna find something to nag about anyway. Like, I'm sorry my house isn't as big and nice as my sister's?