#Baby I’m yours by Barbara Lewis

[hello-galad]

Cid has a battered old radio in his workshop. It catches a frequency that plays old songs, sometimes nostalgic for couples dancing to the rhythm of soft blues, other times all it plays is rock music and Cid hums the lyrics absentmindedly.

Sometimes Cid can hear soft humming coming from somewhere above him, as silent as the turning of pages. Vincent likes to read, perched most of the time on one of the crates or the wing of one of the planes. Sometimes a rafter, others a chair next to Cid’s as the engineer goes over blueprints and equations.

That day the radio station plays a soft but rhythmic melody that Cid will be the first to admit he doesn’t know how to dance to, but he doesn’t really care as he reaches out to Vincent with an extended hand in invitation. Vincent, who had been watching him swing around the workshop, a feeling of peace and happiness in that smile that carefully keeps the cigarette Cid is smoking in place, accepts Cid’s extended hand. Without warning he is lifted from the chair, twirled around and back in the blonde’s arms.

The song ends and is followed by a softer one that Vincent recognizes from back when he was still a Turk for ShinRa.

They sway together to the voice of the singer who reminds her love that she’s forever theirs.

[leclerc-s]

track 001. right where you left me

─── ❝ break-ups happen every day, you don't have to lose it ❞ ───

series masterlist // next

liked by louis_graham, isabellaperez, babs.rodriguez and others

dulceperez it's hell week and i'm struggling to cope

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isabellaperez never have i ever been more grateful for online school

↳ dulceperez we get it you travel for funsies and i get stuck with crippling student dept.

↳ isabellaperez what fucking debt? tio checo said he'd pay for your schooling!

↳ dulceperez alright then, i get the crippling student anxiety.

maejones you got this baby!

↳ dulceperez i really don’t! tell max to send the red bull i’m going to need it, i know you two are still besties!!

↳ maxverstappen1 did checo cut you off again?

↳ dulceperez YES!! SEND HELP!! SOS!!

louis_graham still can’t get over the fact that you know f1 drivers.

↳ dulceperez my uncle is an f1 driver?

↳ babs.rodriguez forget it lou, she won’t understand. she probably grew up around michael schumacher or something.

↳ isabellaperez well, you’re not wrong

mickschumacher if you die can i keep your couch?

↳ dulceperez what the fuck schumacher?

↳ mickschumacher it’s a very comfortable couch.

↳ freyavettel he’s right, it’s very comfortable. i’ve had some great fucking naps on it.

louis graham so the f1 drivers in your comments are just normal?

dulce perez pretty much, yeah

dulce perez we live in monaco, you're telling me you've never ran into like lewis or charles? hell nico lives in monaco.

barbara rodriguez never. louis graham nope.

dulce perez huh, it's not like monaco's that big. i run into my ex all the time. granted he's like best friends with my sister.

barbara rodriguez who the fuck is your ex? and why is your sister best friends with him? dulce perez because she can be? i'm not going to tell her "oh no isa, you can't be friends with arthur because we broke up." dulce perez they were friends way before we dated.

louis graham so his name is arthur? interesting, one look at your sister's instagram tells me that you dated the one and only arthur leclerc.

barbara rodriguez a leclerc? you dated a leclerc? and you let him get away?

dulce perez look, he was busy with racing and i was busy with school. it wasn't going to work out between us so we just broke up.

louis graham interesting how you two still follow each other.

dulce perez we're still friends. that wasn't going to change because we dated.

barbara rodriguez 9 times out of 10, people fall in love all over again.

dulce perez not me. i won't.

dulceperez posted new stories

low quality picture, high quality girl or some fucking corny shit like that. who the fuck gave this guy alcohol?

arthur leclerc does she have a boyfriend? who is he?

mae jones what is this nerd going on about?

isabella perez is this about my sister?

arthur leclerc forget i asked. isabella perez so it is about my sister.

mick schumacher is this about the guy on her story?

isabella perez that's just louis. one of her roomates. remember arthur? they became friends when she started school. arthur leclerc oh. yes. i remember.

freya vettel oh he's totally still in love with her.

lando norris honestly arthur just tell her. get it over with.

bailey winters i doubt you should be giving people advice.

lando norris oh seriously! we get it, i fucked up! isabella perez oh you royally fucked up norris.

lando norris oh be quiet isabella, how many times have you broken up with austin by now?

isabella perez my relationship has nothing to do with this! focus on arthur and my sister!

mick schumacher i can't believe i'm saying this, but how are freya and i the only ones that are mentally healthy??

isabella perez because arthur is stupid. mae is in denial about her feelings. i'm codependent. lando is a dumbass. bailey is collateral damage to lando's dumbassery. AND YOU'RE IN FUCKING DENIAL!! SO IS FREYA!!

freya vettel wow. can't wait for the day all of you are mentally healthy and in healthy relationships.

mae jones at this rate isabella's doomed to divorcing and remarrying austin like 7 times. isabella perez literally fuck you. stop writing songs about max!

bailey winters you're all insane.

arthur leclerc you are too bailey.

mae jones don't worry arthur. i know how to figure out if you'll be seeing her soon arthur leclerc oh no. that's not good.

mae jones odds of seeing dulce at the monaco gp this year?

dulce perez that depends am i allowed to take my emotional support idiots? isabella perez i thought i was your emotional support idiot? max verstappen ooh she's been replaced.

esteban ocon i think we're better off asking what are the odds charles finishes the race.

charles leclerc this is why you've never won a race bitch.

daniel ricciardo who the fuck are her emotional support idiots?

dulce perez my roomates

lando norris BOOO!! WE'RE YOUR EMOTIONAL SUPPORT IDIOTS!!

lewis hamilton you may be an idiot but i am not.

mae jones we're her emotional support chaos gremlins natalia ruiz that makes more sense.

max verstappen you should ask checo if you can bring your friends, not us.

dulce perez i did. he said yes. see all of you back in monaco. dulce perez i just have to ask them.

dulce perez thoughts on attending the monaco grand prix?

barbara rodriguez on my bucket list but currently too broke.

louis graham also on my bucket list but without means of going.

dulce perez i feel like we're forgetting that my uncle is literally an f1 driver??

louis graham SHUT THE FUCK UP!! TELL ME YOU DIDN'T?!! barbara rodriguez NO FUCKING WAY!! I KNEW GOING TO SCHOOL IN MONACO WOULD PAY OFF!!

dulce perez wow. way to use me.

louis graham listen, we love you. you're great. but attending the monaco grand prix is such a dream.

barbara rodriguez I GET TO MEET SIR LEWIS HAMILTON!! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME!!

dulce perez we're going to support red bull not mercedes.

barbara rodriguez yeah but red bull doesn't have lewis hamilton does it?

louis graham personally, i will be supporting aston martin. wherever sebastian vettel is that is where i am.

dulce perez traitors both of you.

barbara rodriguez ARTHUR IS LITERALLY A FERRARI ACADEMY DRIVER! SHUT UP! YOU'RE THE BIGGEST TRAITOR OF ALL!!

dulce perez WHO THE FUCK TOLD YOU THAT?

louis graham we went stalker mode. we had to find out everything about leclerc.

barbara rodriguez he's a cutie. why the hell did you dump him?

dulce perez we are not talking about this.

louis graham BOOO!! AS THE CHILDREN SAY, SPILL THE TEA SIS!!

dulce perez no!

babs.rodriguez, louis_graham, dulceperez posted new stories

who let me be here?? where is lewis hamilton??

holy shit!!

VAMOS TIO CHECO!!

pierre gasly soo...dulce

dulce perez before you ask no. pierre gasly like not even a little bit?

rowan todd why must you ask this, you idiot?

pierre gasly i'm an instigator

dulce perez the answer is no because he has a girlfriend, you moron.

charles leclerc but if he didn't have a girlfriend?

dulce perez you too?

charles leclerc ANSWER THE QUESTION PEREZ!

dulce perez no. not my type.

isabella perez ARTHUR! WHO WAS THE CUTE GUY ON THE PODIUM?! THE PREMA GUY!!

max verstappen SHE'S GOT A CRUSH! arthur leclerc oscar? isabella perez brb gonna go stalk his instagram.

freya vettel anyone is better than a*stin

arthur leclerc trust me when i say he's 100 times better than that guy.

mae jones WAIT! WHO'S YOUR TYPE DULCE??!

natalia ruiz perhaps monégasque? rhymes with shmarthur? dulce perez you people are insufferable. daniel ricciardo THAT WASN'T A NO!

mick schumacher arthur just probably let out the biggest sigh of his life.

arthur leclerc at least i'm not in denial about my feelings. mick schumacher HEY! WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT ME! AND YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH LECLERC!!

sebastian vettel i should consider retirement. that would mean i wouldn't have to deal with this.

fernando alonso i retired and they didn't let me leave. there is no hope for us.

lewis hamilton i told you that your biggest mistake would be showing weakness to max.

max verstappen YOU'RE THE ONE WHO COMFORTED ME FIRST! NOT SEB! lewis hamilton oh sure, i was just supposed to leave a kid out, crying in the rain because his girlfriend had just broken up with him? mae jones sorry, what?

daphne jones idiots, all of you

esteban ocon how's that hidden relationship going for you daphne? daniel ricciardo it's not our fault they haven't figured it out yet, now is it? lewis hamilton and i'm currently in the lead to win this bet so zip it ocon.

isabella perez GUYS! CUTE PREMA GUY IS SINGLE!!

lance stroll at least one thing is still normal around here.

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¡leclerc-s speaks! and thus it begins! okay, listen, i love ross, for story purposes he younger than he actually is. idc what anyone says. i don't if i like this 100% but i'm still posting it.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[keep-on-burnin]

this short little piece was requested by my lovely friends, you know who you are😇 enjoy some drunk and lovey bob<3 also unedited cause I’m lazy ;)

the only sounds in the house were the washing machine rumbling quietly in the background and an old record you’d thrown on. You sat lounging on the couch of your living room, book in hand and half empty wine glass on the table. A stupid rom-com that you weren’t too interested in played on mute across your TV screen. The sun had already set and the sky was now filled with stars. A cool breeze from the ocean blew into your little home through a slightly cracked open window, gifting a pleasant scent of salt water.

You didn’t get much alone time nowadays. All the hustle and bustle that comes along with being a US Naval Aviator rarely let up, and when it did, you’d usually be enjoying a few pints and a round of pool at the Hard Deck with your fellow officers. Tonight though, you’d decided to let Bob go off on his own in favour of finishing a couple loads of laundry and a bottle of wine.

It was nice every once in a while to have time alone with yourself to catch up on all the missed self-care. Bob was always good at reminding you to take care of yourself, though he was kind of a hypocrite.

Tonight was yours to unwind and his to let loose. He was always the one to stay sober at the Hard Deck, politely declining every beer in favour of a glass of water to ensure that both of you and your friends had a way of getting home safe. He was ever the gentleman. Before he left though, you had told him to go have fun and if he needed you would pick him up when he was ready. So, it was quite the surprise to hear the crunching of gravel in your driveway and the sight of old yellow headlights beaming through your open window.

You heard faint slurred sentences of, “I can walk by myself,” obviously Bob, and “You’re plastered, Robert” which could be non other than Rooster.

You could only assume that Bradley was the designated driver tonight, poor soul. You’d had your fair share of DD nights and taking care of drunk aviators was not easy, especially a light-weight like sweet Bobby.

The sound of your front door flying open and a muttered “shit” could be heard from the entry way. You thought about getting up to help your boyfriend, but ultimately decided to sit back and enjoy the show. In your defense, you never got to see Bob drunk, like, ever. Once he passed through the threshold into your softly lit living room you realized just how drunk he really was. His normally gelled back and neat hair was askew, his cobalt eyes drooping, and his signature tipsy smirk was sitting on his lips.

He leans, a little ungracefully, against the doorway.

“Honey, I’m home!” He chirps, that stupid smirk growing wider.

Shaking your head and huffing out a laugh, you slide your bookmark into place and set your paperback next to your now empty wine glass.

“How was your night?” You ask, already full well knowing it must’ve been great.

Bob doesn’t move from his spot against the door frame, he just looks at you and smiles. That fucking smile that makes you weak in the knees. Thank god you’re sitting on the couch or you probably would’ve fallen face first into the carpet, but despite that, you rise to your feet and make your way over to him. Once you’re standing close enough, Bob practically throws all of his body weight on you, making you stumble back a couple steps. You laugh heartily as you let him nuzzle your neck and leave kisses along your skin.

“Night was good. I missed you though.” He confesses, breathing in the subtle scent of your perfume and sighing out once you begin to comb your fingers through his soft hair.

Moments like these were your favourite. Just you and Bob in your own little world, loving each other, holding each other. It was true bliss.

After a few minutes, Bob pulls his face away from your neck and smiles a lopsided, lovesick grin at you. Oh yeah, he’s hammered.

“How much did you drink?” You ask with a giggle, moving your hand down from his hair to the side of his face.

“Too much tequila.” He all but whispers, not wanting to speak too loudly in fear that this moment between you two would end. His soft eyes bore into yours, and now your sporting the same lovesick smile he is. Bob begins to sway back and forth slowly to the new song on the record. Of course it’s a classic love song from the 50’s that he knows by heart, so he sings it to you. It’s romantic, slurred words and all.

It truly feels like a movie. You and Bob dancing under the soft yellow light of the living room, one of you tipsy from wine, the other one plastered from tequila and cheap beer and both smiling like idiots in love.

The silence was nice and comfortable, until Bob said something you’d never thought would come out of his mouth, especially in this state.

“Will you marry me?”

“What?” You ask back in disbelief, chuckling at the very sudden question.

Bob would normally recoil while his pretty face flushed with a dark pink, but drunk Bob is a different breed. He just smiles wider, if that’s even possible, before continuing,

“I love you so much honey, and I wanna love you everyday for the rest of my life.”

The confession surprises you to say the least, but you know that drunk words are sober thoughts, you also know that sober Bob has probably been stressing about that question since the day he met you. So of course, with a teary eyed smile you answer his question by saying,

“Ask me again when you’re sober” and you sealed the deal with a kiss.

[djmossback]

Spacebar 07/20/24

Third Space Saturday

The Tracks

2100 hrs

Brothers Johnson, Strawberry Letter 23 (12 Inch)

Grace Jones, I Need A Man (12 Inch)

Junie Morrison, Techno-Freqs (12 Inch)

Wire, Ahead (12 Inch)

KC and The Sunshine Band, I’m Your Boogie Man (LP cut)

Judas Priest, Metal Gods (LP cut)

George Clinton, Do Fries Go With That Shake (12 Inch)

One Way, Cutie Pie (12 Inch EP cut)

Beastie Boys, She’s Crafty (LP cut)

Booker T. & The MG’s, Hip Hug-Her (LP cut)

Average White Band, Pick Up The Pieces (LP cut)

Foreigner, Urgent (12 Inch)

ZZ Top, Cheap Sunglasses (LP cut) (2200 hrs)

Emotions, Best Of My Love (LP cut)

Michael Jackson, Rock With You (7 inch)

Sanford and Townsend Band, Smoke From A Distant Fire (LP cut)

Dazz Band, Let It Whip (7 inch)

Gap Band, Outstanding (LP cut)

Robert Palmer, You Are In My System (7 inch)

Roots Manuva, Again & Again (12 Inch)

Sade, Hang On To Your Love (12 Inch)

Dillinger, Cokane In My Brain (7 inch)

Simple Minds, Don’t You Forget About Me (12 Inch)

Vince Staples, Norf Norf (LP cut)

Flying Lizards, Money (That’s What I Want) (LP cut)

Dry Cleaning, Scratchcard Lanyard (7 inch)

Mary Jane Girls, In My House (12 Inch)

Donna Summer, I Feel Love (12 Inch)

Berlin, The Metro (7 inch)

DEVO, Snowball (7 inch)

Tilt, Arcade Funk (12 Inch)

Eddy Grant, Electric Avenue (LP cut)

Toni Basil, Mickey (7 inch)

The Clash, Rock The Casbah (7 inch)

Cheryl Lynn, Got To Be Real (7 inch)

Lakeside, Fantastic Voyage (LP cut)

Steve Miller Band, Abracadabra (7 inch)

Run DMC, Walk This Way (12 Inch)

Nazareth, RAZAMANAZ (LP cut)

Amyl & The Sniffers, Some Mutts (7 inch)

Kingsmen, Louie Louie (7 inch)

Kenny Rogers & The First Edition, Ruby (Don’t Take Your Love To Town) (7 inch)

Police, Roxanne (7 inch)

Go-Go’s, We Got The Beat (7 inch)

Bauhaus, Bela Lugosi’s Dead (12 Inch)

Madvillain, America’s Most Blunted (12 Inch)

Cameo, Word Up (12 Inch)

Skee-Lo, I Wish (12 Inch)

Pet Shop Boys, West End Girls (12 Inch)

Eiffel 65, Move Your Body (12 Inch)

Kylie Minogue, Can’t Get Blue Monday Out Of My Head (12 Inch)

J.J. Fad, Supersonic (12 Inch)

Ohio Players, Love Rollercoaster (12 Inch EP cut)

James Brown,I Got You (I Feel Good) (7 inch)

Del Tha Funky Homosapien, Mistadobalina (LP cut)

Kendrick Lamar, YAH (LP cut)

Leroy Sibbles Nicodemus, Rock Steady Party (12 Inch)

Barbara Lewis, Baby I’m Yours (LP cut)

0113 Finished

The scenery

TASTING NOTES

I spent the day not thinking about the set, preferring to head into Spacebar “cold” to see what developed. But, I had spent a fair amount of time since my last set combing through online lists and the singles section of the local Record Hut to find some fresh material. And, a lot of it found its way onto the decks and into the ears of the listeners at Third Space Saturday. I do love the format of the single. I’m not necessarily attached to the extended mixes; often I will play the LP cut included on the single, or the 7” mix if it is on there. I like the focus of the shorter versions, but sometimes the songs lend themselves to the stretched-out format. Just depends on the song, as always.

It is really hot in Boise – not just summer heat, but triple-digit temperatures every day for weeks on end. I got sweaty just loading the rig. When I got downtown, there was a huge event of some sort happening in Capitol Park, with several streets blocked, and I worried that I would have trouble finding a parking space. But I found a space really close, and rolled my gear into the elevator. Nothing worked. The door wouldn’t even close. I text Will, and am surprised when he appears at the elevator. We lug all my gear down the stairs, past the line going upstairs to the speakeasy. Evidently, the fire department had visited just before I got there, because the fog machine had tripped the fire alarm. Will is working the door, and I recognize absolutely none of the bar staff.

I’m later than I wanted to be, so after I set myself up, I hurriedly weigh my options. I usually start with a song that has kind of a fanfare intro, but tonight it seemed appropriate to ease into things, so I chose “Strawberry Letter 23” by the Brothers Johnson, a new 12” single I acquired last week. My first hour is a combination of 12” extended versions and LP cuts; going from Wire to KC and the Sunshine Band to Judas Priest to George Clinton sounded better in person than it looks on the page. The bar scene is ebbing and flowing as usual, but it’s summer, people are outside, or in the mountains, or hunkered down in the most air-conditioned spot they can find.

I put on a long Grace Jones single, and Will gives me a tour of the changes coming to the bar. The room that used to house the print shop is cleared out. It’s going to house more machines, and be a separate space within the space. The music will still be there, but there will be more options for people, and a better use of the space, which was not generating enough use before. It will be good to give people more places to hang, to be with their people. Our sound volume is lower, which I kind of like. It presents the music better, and makes things more comfortable.

My son shows up with a posse. He comes into the booth and greets me. I express my unease, how I feel like I’m aging out of such things as nightlife, and fun, but he is unconvinced. Says I’m fine. He heads out on the floor with his crew, and I lose track of him for a while. About a half-hour later he comes back up to say goodbye, introduces me to a friend, and they ask about the Grime record I played. Roots Manuva. They dig it. I told them I couldn’t see anyone reacting to the music one way or the other, aside from the kid who came up and scrolled through the new internet jukebox that’s on the wall by the bar. They assured me that people were vibing, even the youngsters. It was good to hear, and I noticed people moving to the beat after that.

After Sam leaves, I don’t see a single person I know come in for the rest of the night. I am ok with this. Not that I don’t love the support from people I know, but I’m also a realist. I know it would require great effort for me to be out downtown on a Saturday night, so I understand what it entails.

I’ve hardly played any 7” records, mostly concentrating on longer 12” mixes from my new acquisitions. It feels really good. I’m putting things together in the right places, there are very few technical gaffes from me, and I generally feel good about how I’ve put records together.

The Donna Summer 12” single “I Feel Love” is a record I’ve been looking for my entire adult life, and now it’s mine. The 8-minute version did not disappoint! The mechanized spine of the song, the repetitive bubbling riff, it was the first record I heard from her, and I instantly became a fan. The simplicity and directness appealed to me, as did the four-on-the-floor kick drum.

I put a different Nazareth track into the mix, RAZAMANAZ. (I don’t know, it just seems to work better in all caps.) I had it cued and ready to go, but I then reversed course, and instead of following it up with RUN-DMC (again with the all caps!) I switched the order, and played “Walk With Me” first. It worked. The Nazareth track is like Motorhead, with a “better” singer. I need to find a better copy of the record, though. It was kind of worn. So is the Bauhaus record I plucked from a dollar section a while ago. Even though it’s got an audible (and visible) scratch on it, it plays through, and the surface noise doesn’t detract – it kind of adds something to the sound of “Bela Lugosi’s Dead.” It’s kind of a gothic doppelganger to the Donna Summer record – repetitive, atmospheric, less busy and more organic. Music is amazing that way. Very disparate intentions coming through, and changing the way things sound. And you don’t stop/you go on and on/til the break of dawn.

The thing is, though, a lot of the old 7” records from the ’50s and ’60s still sound great, even with the wear. The record players they were made for were not like the Hi-Fi players for classical and pop records of the day, and by pop records, I mean things like Doris Day, Johnny Mathis and other adult music. I’m fascinated by how time takes language and meaning and metamorphosizes it to fit the needs of people, of audiences, of commerce. You don’t/can’t control it, but you can ride it, and see where it goes.

That is the essence of what I am trying to do: follow the through line, and paint pictures, express myself, play things that sound good to me, communicate a feeling and vibe to people. I didn’t put Amyl and the Sniffers next to the Kingsmen and follow it up with Kenny Rogers to be a clever show-off, I did it because I thought it would sound good, that they were all good records, and the juxtaposition would make a listener reconsider what those songs were about.

Or, they could just vibe to the beat.

I’m so happy I get to do this, and I’m glad to have the opportunity to contribute to Spacebar Arcade. I sometimes feel I should be doing more – get on the microphone and get the party started, as it were. It’s just not me. All I can do is show up until they tell me not to. It’s a tough business. It’s not complicated, but it is unpredictable. You can do everything right, and still fail. Luck is underestimated by our culture. Being in the right place, at the right time, doing something you love and believe in and being rewarded? It’s not a given. Trust this: it’s just business. Pivot. Change course. Listen. Be true to yourself.

Next Third Space Saturday for me is on September 21st, 2024. I’m taking August off for Holiday. Just like a European.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Wednesday, December 6

(Puppet Angel walks dejectedly back to his office) PUPPET ANGEL: Harmony, get my call list. HARMONY: (watches Puppet Angel, confused) Um... (Spike walks toward Harmony's desk.) PUPPET ANGEL: And Spike needs a car. SPIKE: (to Harmony) You heard the puppet.

~~Smile Time~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Good And Evil by badly_knitted (Kendra, Buffy, Angel, PG)

Seeking Ghosts by madimpossibledreamer (Assasin's Creed xover, Xander, T)

Hall Pass by NAOA (Cordelia, Harmony, T)

Fire by TheOriginalLovelace (Buffy/Faith, M)

Moon River by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

age differences by Amina (Buffy/Oz, PG-13, NOTE OZ)

Moon River by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

The Christmas that Spuffy… by Tessa (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Sweet But Twisted. Does that Make Me a Candy Cane? by honeygirl51885 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

The Merry Month of Magnus Presents... Bare Minimum by gwennie (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

[Chaptered Fiction]

“You Came.” “You Called.” - Ch. 1-2 by FivexFiveB (Blazinwolve) (Faith/OC, not rated)

Beginning's End - Ch. 1 by arcanedreamer (Assassin's Creed xover, Xander, T)

Advent Calendiles - Ch. 4-6 by HAL1500 (drabble collection, Giles/Jenny, G and M)

I'm Only Your Darkness - Ch. 13 by Karnstein99 (Buffy/Faith, E)

High Tide - Ch. 4 by ClowniestLivEver (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Slay Bells Ringing - Ch. 6 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, PG)

A Darkened Night of the Soul - Ch. 22 by In Mortal (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

In The Dark With You - Ch. 25 by Geliot99 (Buffy/Spike, R)

The Courage Of Another - Ch. 6 by BlueZeroZeroOne (Buffy, Legend of Zelda xover, FR15)

High Tide - Ch. 4 by ClowniestLivEver (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Slay Bells Ringing - Ch. 6 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, PG)

Spuffy's Little Helper - Ch. 6 by Alyot (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

A Very Summers Winter - Ch. 6 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13)

Cherry On Top - Ch. 10 by Maxine Eden (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

[Images, Audio & Video]

Gifset: "A Buffy Christmas" by The WB (1998) [TV commercial] by whatisyourchildhoodtrauma (Buffy/Angel, worksafe)

Gifset: I'll show you what a Slayer really is. BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (1997-2003) by spuffygifs (Buffy, worksafe)

Gifset: Angel the Series | 5x14 "Smile Time" by mycatismyfriend (Puppet Angel, Harmony, Spike, worksafe)

Gifset: BABY I’M YOURS — BARBARA LEWIS by detectivedawnsummers (Willow/Tara, worksafe)

Gifset: buffy, cordelia, & homoerotic confrontations behind the bronze by coffygifs (Buffy/Cordelia, worksafe)

Gifset: And while most of Southern California is enjoying a balmy Christmas... by charmedslayer (Joyce, Faith, worksafe)

Gifset: BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER | 3.09 // 6.07 by andremichaux (Cordelia, Buffy, worksafe)

Manip: I Saw Buffy Kissing Santa Claus by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, shirtless Spike)

Cross Stitch: Does anyone else cross stitch? I'm working on a Buffy stitchalong! by amethyn (worksafe)

Artwork: Unwrap Your Present by JSBirsa (Spike, NSFW)

[Reviews & Recaps]

btvs rewatch - season 2 episode 9: what's my line, part 1 by slut-jpeg

Spike's wardrobe change... [in S5 E14 - Crush] by jenny-from-the-box

PODCAST: HELLMOUTH HOMOS: Helpless by Fear Queers

PODCAST: ANGEL gives Cordelia an alternate life [Birthday] by Gimmicks

[Fandom Discussions]

Ask Answered: Thoughts on Riley?? And thoughts on season 4 in general?? by xandersrailcrash

... on the horror of not recognizing your own body... [and Angel asks Harmony] if she remembers being human by dear-massacre and lucky-bishop

buffy and cordelia are like. cordelia invites buffy out to the bronze the very first night they meet... by chasingfictions

POLL: Which Buffy character is most likely to fall for a cyber scam? by aphony-cree

The horse Giles rides in season 7.... by anthonyheadwithanimals

Who was your favorite one-off vampire or demon? by HisMrs and others

In HIM, why is it BUFFY'S responsibility to find SPIKE housing? updated by NoShip and thrasherpix

Do you think Buffy would move back into College Room had Joyce lived? updated by NoShip and others

Did you like Giles? updated by NoShip

If you could change anything about a season, what would you change? by george123890yang

Do you think Willow, Xander and Giles felt guilty after Empty Places? by sadhungryandvirgin

How were the witches at Springfield College so bad at magic? by farfetchedfrank

[Alphabet game]... what Giles quotes you guys come up with. Starting with “A” by TransmanDan20

Buffy S6 & S7 [resurrection and Willow accountability] by johnnyorac

Would it have been worth trying to "curse" other Vampires similar to Angel? by Inspirational_Owl

Ancient Art History themes in Buffy TVS by cryptidr_iley24

Spoiler - Buffy and the monks [how was Dawn created] by mandalinajones

ELIMINATION GAME! Day 2. We lose S4! Vote out your LEAST favourite season. [ATS] by WildBarb80s

Wesley suddenly using guns a lot? by trex397

Did Cordelia, Wesley and Fred have siblings? by JellyfishDry9464

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

James Marsters to Attend Austria Comic Con 25-26 May 2024 | @austriacomiccon via dontkillspike

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Join the editor team :)

[doyourememberrocknrollradio]

Baby, I'm Yours · Barbara Lewis

[shana-rosee]

10 songs / 10 people

Tagged by @highlynerdy thanks so much for the tag! 🥰

Decided to go with my hopeless romantic playlist today 💞

1. State Of Grace by Taylor Swift

2. BEFORE LOVE CAME TO KILL US by Jessie Reyez

3. Like I’m Gonna Lose You by Meghan Trainor

4. Rivers and Roads by The Head And The Heart

5. Romeo & Juliet by Peter McPoland

6. Delicate by Taylor Swift

7. Style by Taylor Swift

8. When She Loved Me by Sarah McLachlan

9. Issues by Julia Michaels

10. Baby, I’m Yours by Barbara Lewis

tagging: @sauraunderscore @witchmd13 @snapshotmaestro @thebookluvrr1816 @pandalikeelf @burglarhobbit @nuttersinc @kickassfu @papysanzo @dollopheadsandclotpoles 

[lovesongbracket]

PRELIMINARY ROUND A - Match 18

This is a nomination round. The top songs across ALL preliminary round polls will become our 64 competitors in Round 1.

Note: It’s about the song, not the recording. The artists/specific tracks provided are either the original, most popular, or suggested by a submitter. If you prefer a different version, a cover of the song, you like the song but not the artist etc, don’t let that deter you.

Youtube videos of all songs & submitter notes are under the cut.

Accidentally in Love - Counting Crows

Anyone Else But You - The Moldy Peaches

Baby I’m Yours - Barbara Lewis

Come Away With Me - Norah Jones

Fucked Up - Young Rising Sons

Caring for someone at their worst <3

I Love You Always Forever - Donna Lewis

Looking Out for You - Joy Again

Paper Boats - Darren Korb feat. Ashley Barrett

nothing like the love between a pissed off singer and her boyfriend trapped in a sword. might partially be the context of when the song played but i legit cried.

Stockholm Syndrome - One Direction

Turning Out - AJR

Listen this song acknowledges how love has been portrayed by the media (specifics Disney) and how that can be hard to achieve and it’s also about growing as a person and there’s a part 2 which makes me cry

[oknowkiss]

ooooh I wanna know 5, 32, and 57 please!!

5: forever - the little dippers (this may or may not be my “harry beyond the veil” theme song which may or may not be relevant to fics that haven’t been written yet but perhaps will be next year who could say)

32: baby, i’m yours - barbara lewis (i mean…. romance am i fucking right. honorable mention to the arctic monkeys cover which definitely did things to me in college)

57: love hurts - the everly brothers (lol i started writing drarry this year. that’s the reason)

[iwannabeyourman]

for the wholesome asks: 2, 14, and 27!

2. ough there’s a lot but my favorite pictures of the boys have to be from the Mad Day Out photoshoot. Any of em take your pic. 10/10 no notes it looks like something me and my friends would’ve posted to Instagram at age 11

14. The John Lennon Be My Baby cover lives in my head absolutely rent free and I KNOW a full Beatles version would’ve devoured. ALSO baby I’m yours by Barbara Lewis. Sometimes I listen to the arctic monkeys cover and pretend </3 they should have done more girl group/female musician covers im always saying this

27. my go to Beatles karaoke song will ALWAYS be oh! Darling. I sing it all the time when I’m home alone and I go all out lol.

[opulentconceptions]

October 1965 – Penny Valentine picks the new singles

POP SHOP: What’s new at the record bar – Disc Weekly, October 1965 Peter & Gordon Baby I’m Yours (Parlophone)Personally, if they had to do a Barbara Lewis song I’d have liked to have heard “Make Me Your Baby” – but this is very good. Gordon starts it all off, sounding very possessive, and Peter joins him in that dear choirboy voice of his. It’s all tremendously convincing, and I hope it’s a…

[karaoketracks]

Baby I'm Yours by Barbara Lewis Custom Mix Backing Track

[shoesofthefishermanswife]

HI KADE <333333 73 AND 45!

73. Baby, I’m Yours - Barbara Lewis

i’ve loved this song for years, it’s such a put a smile on your face song

45. Kisses Sweeter Than Wine- Jimmie Rodgers

i had a 50s/60s country phase this summer ans this song is so fun. first off, wife guy moment. second off, each verse goes up a half step so singing it is like a choir warm up

[teenmomcentral]

Andrew Lewis says he wants his troubled teen son Jace to reach out to him.

The long-lost baby daddy of former Teen Mom 2 star Jenelle Evans sent a video message to the boy (via The Sun), begging Jace to contact him.

“Look Jace, man, alright you’re 14 years old. I heard that you ran away twice…I told your grandma and I told your mom that I’ll always be here,” Andrew said. “They both said that, once you turn a teenager, I would be allowed to talk to you. Well, now is the time.”

Jace— who (in Andrew’s words) “turn a teenager” last year— has had no contact with his dad since he was an infant. Still, Andrew feels that Jace should be able to come to him to discuss his recent troubles, which include two attempts to run away.

“You ran away, we need to talk, man!” Andrew said. “I tried to get in touch with your mom, I tried to get in touch with your grandma. Still no availability after 14 years. So I’m just letting you know, the only way I can reach out to you is the media. You wanna talk, you wanna see me, you want to Zoom, we can do whatever you want. I’m right here.”

As The Ashley previously reported, Jace ran away at least twice in August. The first attempt happened at the teen’s school and resulted in the cops sending search dogs out to find him. He was eventually located and the Missing Juvenile alert put out for him was cancelled. Weeks later, Jace went missing from Jenelle’s home on The Land. He was located a few hours later at a gas station about 10 minutes from the Eason’s swampy abode. 

This is not the first time Andrew has used The Sun to talk about Jace and claim that the teen is being kept from him. In April, he did a series of interviews with the outlet, begging Jenelle and Barb to allow him to see his son.

“Jenelle, Barbara, just let me see him. Let me see Jace,” Andrew pleaded. “Let me talk to him. Give me something. This is no more MTV bulls**t, this is reality. Stop living on cloud nine and fall the f**k down to reality, because that’s where you’ve been living. I’m not trying to be rude to you.”

While Andrew has not been physically present in Jace’s life, he has apparently been consistent in his child support payments for the boy. He had been paying child support to Barbara since she obtained custody of Jace in 2010. After Jenelle regained custody of Jace in March, Andrew’s child support payments have gone to her. (In April, The Sun reported that Andrew is paying Jenelle $365 a month for Jace.) 

[ex-ie]

Baby, I’m Yours - Barbara Lewis

[darlingshane]

In Other Words, Until I Die

Frank Castle x F!Reader

Rating: T // Warnings: Angst, Language. // Word Count: 4,843

Summary – @gabymiller​ asked – can I request a frank castle fic where he’s married with a baby girl and they see on the news that he is dead but with the help of Curtis his wife finds out he’s Pete and they have a angsty fluffy reunion ❤️

A/N: This came out more angsty than I expected but I hope you like it anyway. There’s still some fluff and many bittersweet moments. // A/N 2:  Lisa is Frank and Reader’s baby, with all my respect to Maria and the Castle family. A/N 3: The title comes from  the song Baby, I'm yours, by Barbara Lewis. It's mentioned a couple times if you wanna listen beforehand.

- You can also read at AO3.

Frank came back for good.

That's what he believed. That's what he needed. To be home and become the husband and the father he always wanted to be, but the universe cared little for what Frank Castle wanted. It had other plans for him and wasn't going to let him settle that easily just cause he had a change of heart.

No, it wouldn't be that simple. Not after what happened during his last deployment. Not after Cerberus.

His bliss at home – with you and getting reacquainted with Lisa, who had just turned one, – was quickly cut short only three weeks after settling back in your lives.

What pulled him out of that delusion was when one day, while you were at work; he took Lisa to the park and on his way back he found an envelope in the mail slot with no stamp or address on it. Just his name and CD that contained a very damning video of his last mission in Kandahar.

A couple of days later, he disappeared before you woke up.

He took that piece of evidence as a threat and in order to figure out who was behind that, he had to be as far away from you as possible. It was the only way to keep you safe cause he knew that that mission was different, and while he hoped it had ended with that bullet, it didn't. It followed him back home, and he couldn't have that. He wasn't going to be the reason to put you and the baby in danger.

He wrote you a letter, though, that felt like a joke where he vaguely explained that he had to go away to figure things out and that he didn't know if he would ever come back. He said that you and Lisa were better off without him, that he'd never be what you wanted him to be.

You couldn't understand how he could have sunk that low to bury your relationship in such a crude manner like it was nothing. And despite being mad as hell, deep down you were certain that those words weren't true. If he was trying to make you angry, he knew how to. But he couldn't possibly believe that you were stupid enough to buy that.

You've been together long enough to read between the lines, and if he thought you were going to give up that easily, he was wrong.

Something was off, and you needed to know the truth, and the best way to do that was to visit some of his closest friends.

None of them knew shit, or so they said. Except for Curtis, if the others had lied, Curt didn't. He couldn't. He was an honest man and told you straight up that Frank had to leave to keep both of you safe, that there were people after him who weren't going to hesitate about hurting you to get to him. He also reassured that Frank didn't love anything more in the world than you and Lisa, that he was completely torn apart the last time he saw him.

But that wasn't very reassuring at all. It was bullshit. You loved Frank, but it didn't make sense to you what he could've done so wrong that prompted an escape number instead of going to the police or coming up with something else.

 A lot happened in the next few weeks since he left. To say it turned your life upside down was an understatement.

First, you were stunned by the bombarding news and headlines pointing your husband as the perpetrator of a series of murders, including his former CO, Ray Schoonover.

Quickly after that, you were brought in for questioning twice, once by the NYPD, and a second one by Homeland Security, claiming that he was part of two bombings along with a man named Lewis Wilson.

They got warrants and all kinds of bullshit to search the house. To their disbelief, they didn't find anything that could point them in Frank's direction.

It was then that you understood the coldness of his words in that letter he wrote. He wanted everyone to believe that he had abandoned you, so they'd leave you alone. He anticipated that happening, and they still went at you either way, but not as viciously as they'd have if they believed you knew what he was up to.

It was heartbreaking seeing your husband dissected by the so-called experts and people who once knew him, trying to put the pieces together of this person they claimed was a psychopath.

You wanted to believe Frank was innocent, but the evidence kept piling up against him.

At the end of the day, you missed him dearly and there wasn't a side or another, it was only his and yours and Lisa’s. And you were certain that behind all the secrecy, there was a good reason for his actions. You wished he had told you. Maybe he thought you were useless to him, or it was as dangerous as he said it was for you to be privy to all that, but being in the dark was just as bad. You'd have done anything for him if he had asked.

It was exhausting, you could barely keep it together. Most nights you didn’t sleep. And if it wasn't for your commitment to Lisa, you definitely would've lost your mind a long time ago. Taking care of her and making sure she was happy and healthy was the only thing that kept you going. She had the most beautiful face and smile, and you marveled at how much her eyes looked like Frank's every time she opened them in the morning, and you could even see it at night before she closed them.

Every evening before bedtime, you'd hold her up in your arms, showing her the picture of daddy in his dress blues sitting on the mantle, cause you wanted her to remember him as the good man you knew. As that same guy you met five years ago who stood in line for ten minutes every day just so he could talk to you for one while he ordered his coffee; until one day he was brave enough to ask you out.

“Don't believe anything you hear, okay? Daddy loves you,” you whispered in her little ear, staring at Frank's portrait, as if she could understand anything that was going on.

“Dada,” that night she stuck out her arm and pressed her tiny finger against his nose over the glass.

“You like dada's nose? It's kinda funny, isn't it?”

She stared at you and repeated dada.

“Don't tell him I say that,” you smiled tiredly and glanced at the still portrait of Frank one more time, holding back tears, blindly hoping he’d come back some day.

In an old building near the river, Frank was watching the whole thing through the cameras he had David install in the house, so he could keep an eye on you. The pace of his heart picked up, capturing his baby girl calling him dada behind a screen, and as much as he wanted to run back home and hold the both of you, it was nearly impossible. You were being watched, not just by him, and there wasn't a safe way for him to contact you without arousing suspicion.

He could see how tired you were and how much you had endured. You were strong, he had no doubt, but he hated seeing you suffering, and if he could go back in time and change the course of his actions, so he could be there with you, he abso-fucking-lutely would.

Once Lisa was asleep, and you turned in for the night, he laid back on the uncomfortable cot. He closed his eyes, as all those beautiful memories he built up with you flashed behind them. From the moment he saw you behind the counter at the café till the last: your first date, your first kiss, a couple of arguments in between, all the times he made love to you, countless times speaking on the phone, your wedding, the day his baby girl was born…

If you had Lisa, he only had his treasured memories wrapped in an old song that started playing in his head that you first danced to on the second time you went out with him. That same song was later the one that played at your wedding. It’s called– Baby, I'm yours.

Frank could hear the melody clearly and still feel the weight and touch of your hands when they linked around his neck on the dance floor when he invited you to dance. He couldn’t do the twist, but he could definitely swing with you to a couple of slower songs like that one.

It was at the fundraiser at a VA center in Brooklyn, where everyone was dressed like it was the 60s. He would have never agreed to go to a themed party like that, no, but it was for a good cause, and it also gave him the opportunity to ask you out on a second date. So, he bought the tickets, found himself a classic, nice suit like Don Draper wore in Mad Men, and traded his tactical boots for oxfords. Admittedly, he didn't consider himself as handsome as Don, but you made him feel that way. He wasn't a cheater either, so, all things considered, he could take pride in that, but he was too humble to recognize his own good qualities and wasn’t going to start any time soon.

For all the times he called himself old-fashioned, that day he looked the part too. He showed up with a bouquet of flowers and tucked his elbow out, so you could link your arm with his as you walked up to his truck. It was adorable how bashfully he looked at you and the way his lips curved up when you kissed him at the end of the night.

He wished for more moments like those. His life couldn't end like this without getting to hold you and Lisa again. Could it?

That unbearable need pushed him to keep going, to settle his score, clear his name, just so he could return to you and make new memories.

But again, his plans were destroyed once more the night on the pier when he found who was working with Schoonover…

All his dreams of getting back to you blew up in that explosion. The puzzle was more complex than he initially thought, so he ultimately had to let you go for good and let the world, including you, believe that Frank Castle had died in that boat.

In his wake, he kept working in the shadows with his partner while watching you helplessly bury a burned body that wasn’t his. He had David hack and falsify all the appropriate DNA and dental records, so nobody would glance at it twice, and it worked.

The world finally left you alone after his death and when they stopped watching– he stopped too because you deserve to grieve and live in peace; and because every time he saw you on the screen it was like being run over by five cars in a row.

He'd still get an update or photo of Lisa from Curtis, who tried to convince him many times to let you know that he was alive, but he wouldn't budge. He still believed you were safer not knowing.

Curt hated lying to you and after the funeral you only saw him a couple of times, briefly. First, you didn't want to face people at all for a while, and second, you stayed focused on Lisa and your job, and that didn't give you much time to do anything else.

Frank grew a beard, got a new identity for the time being, and kept his dead down. He lived like a ghost for ten months, hitting wall after wall of bullshit that kept him from finding out who was the real asshole behind Cerberus. That was the last piece he needed.

Being dead was easy, kind of. He didn't have to worry anymore, cause nobody knew what he was up to. And becoming Pete Castiglione gave him the freedom to come and go as he pleased, even during daylight, he’d just slip a cap on and call it a day.

What kept him up at night was abandoning the two of you. His whole damn word that he missed so much, it physically hurt. You were so close, barely a handful of miles away, that he could just be there in less than an hour if he wanted to. And that was it, he always wanted, alas the fear of putting you in peril was greater.

He’d stare at the picture of the two of you every night. Traced your features with his finger before succumbing to reading instead to keep his mind occupied. He had never read as much as he did during those months.

One day, he was getting a couple of books at this bookstore, cause he had already gone through Curt's and David’s entire bookshelves, and he needed new material.

In there, he was taken aback at finding you with Lisa on your lap over the kid's section. It seemed like some mommy and me kind of class, with mostly moms and a couple of dads, surrounded by babies and toddlers listening to a young girl and boy taking turns reading from a Dr. Seuss book.

Lisa had grown so much since he last saw her, obviously. And he couldn't turn his gaze away, memorizing every detail of his baby girl from her hair held in two buns atop of her head, to her outfit of a flashy purple shirt with a dinosaur, jeans, and sneakers. He was stunned by the way she freely gestured, expressing herself like he hadn’t seen before, laughing at the kids’ funny voices, and being nothing but inquisitive at her surroundings. She wouldn’t just stay seated on your lap and would stand several times up on her short legs, spin around, and go over to the front row with the other kids whenever she pleased.

His eyes welled up, realizing how much he'd missed. She could walk now, and he wasn't there to see that happen. She was about to turn two and wouldn’t be there to witness that either out of his own stupidity.

He tried making himself invisible, peering behind a bookshelf, so he could see you smiling and quietly sharing just a few words with one of the moms on your side.

His heart stopped when he saw Lisa’s little hand waving at him in one of her spins like she had recognized him, but she was just probably playing around. She couldn’t have. Could she? It’d be astonishing if she could.

When he looked at himself in the mirror, he could barely see Frank any more behind all that hair. Maybe it was the eyes that gave him away, or the nose, probably. He figured you kept showing her pictures of him and telling stories no matter how painful it was; and he was right, you did.

His lips turned into a smile, and she smiled back widely, showing all her baby teeth before returning to mommy’s side.

When the class was over, he quickly slipped his ball cap back on and strode away towards the exit because if he didn’t, he might’ve ended up doing something he regretted.

“Bye-bye, dada,” you heard Lisa say to your surprise as you were putting her jacket on.

Your brow turned into a frown, glancing over your shoulder to see if she had seen someone that looked like Frank in the bookstore. That was the only explanation for it, you had never seen her say that other than when you put her to bed that she wished his picture good night.

She was too little to understand what death was, so you saved that conversation for later, all she knew that even if she didn’t see daddy again, he’d always be with her. Maybe that was a little confusing too for an almost two-year-old.

“You wanna see dada?”

She nodded, and it broke your heart a little more, if it was possible, after everything you’ve been through.

You handed invitations to a few moms for Lisa's birthday party that you planned for next week and chatted with them for a bit before heading home.

As you were finally starting to feel more like your old self, those few days left to her second birthday quickly changed that again. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but you could tell someone was watching you, and it started to creep you out that Lisa kept babbling with her little vocabulary that she saw Frank more than once. The first was at the bookstore, you thought it'd end there, but there was another time at the grocery store, and a third time at the park.

It was like his ghost was haunting you. After all this time, only Frank would dare to show up right when you were pulling yourself out of the suffocating pit of sadness.

On the day of Lisa’s birthday, you found a package addressed to you on the porch, but it was a present for her. Since there was no return address you opened it first, just for safety, unsticking carefully one side of the wrapping paper to find a box that had a stuffed green dinosaur inside, a cute card wishing her Happy Birthday, and a book titled ‘One Batch, Two Batch’ with a big bear and a baby bear holding a cookie on the cover. You knew she’d love that, so you put it back together as it came and hid it for later, wondering who could have sent that.

“I feel like I’m going crazy,” you told Curt after the party, fidgeting with Frank’s wedding band that was hanging on a chain around your neck.

He stuck around to catch up and helped you clean up, cause you hadn’t seen him in a few months.

You had put Lisa to sleep already, which wasn’t hard after all the excitement of the day. She enjoyed every single second and went to sleep with that stuffed dino cradled to her chest from the mysterious sender.

“Yeah? What happened?”

“I don’t know, I just… she keeps talking about Frank and I feel like he’s watching over us or something.”

You saw Curt swallow as he towel-dried the dishes.

“I am crazy, am I?” you said when he didn’t give you a reply.

“No, no… I was just thinking. That doesn’t sound crazy at all. You miss him, and so does she because you still tell her about him.”

“You think I should stop?”

“No, that’s not what I meant. I’m just saying it is normal to miss him. He's a great part of your life.”

“Yeah, but I’ve always missed him. This is different. It feels like I'm back to the beginning when he left, and I knew he was out there, but I couldn’t see him, you know?”

Curt simply nodded.

He couldn't keep up with the lie anymore and hated seeing you hurt because of Castle, which he was sure now he had been lurking around for what you’ve just had said. He wished Frank would've listened to him earlier. You needed to know the truth, but it couldn't come from him.

It was a few days later that you left Lisa with the babysitter in the afternoon and drove to St. John's after getting a text from Curtis saying that he needed to talk to you alone, that it was important.

The sky was already dark, since days were shorter then. As you pulled up at the end of the street you saw a few people coming out of the church, some gathering on the pavement to have a smoke and a few words before parting ways.

Curt was waiting for you outside when you got to the doors, a couple of guys were saying goodbye to him as you walked up the stairs.

“I need you to keep an open mind,” he started, treading carefully and motioning in the direction of the staircase that led to a basement.

“Okay.”

You didn’t know what to expect to be honest, but all the secrecy made you a little nervous. You started biting the inside of your cheek and tucked your hands in your jacket’s pockets, following him in silence down the stairs and across a long hallway until he came to a halt before reaching the end.

He glanced at you, tilting his head to the side, pointing to the room where his meetings were held.

“I need you to take a deep breath and go in. There’s someone who wants to talk to you.”

“What? Who?” Your brow narrowed.

“Trust me. You gotta see for yourself.”

There was no breath to take but an exasperated sigh that left your nose before taking a couple of steps forwards. When you crossed that little threshold into this room you found a tall man, all dressed in black, leaning against the big, yellow tiled wall, with his head hanging down.

You looked back, over your shoulder, for a moment and Curt was already gone or out of sight, and for lack of words facing this stranger, you cleared your throat loudly in order to claim his attention.

What came next was probably the last thing that you thought of finding here. You’ve never been hit by a bullet, but at that moment – as the mysterious man slowly lifted his head, you captured Frank's features behind disheveled curls and a bushy beard – it felt just like one went straight through your heart.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he said, and it sounded like gravel coming out of his mouth that made the skin at the back of your neck rise at the texture of his familiar voice.

The utter shock that took all over your body didn’t let you move or speak up. You wanted to scream, but you could only stare, noticing your face quickly heating up, and it took you a moment to realize you were already crying.

Your heart pounded anxiously in your chest, begging you to take a breath.

“I know it’s a lot to take in, but I’m here,” he spoke again.

It felt like a cheap trick your mind was playing on you because that person in front of you couldn't be Frank Castle. It was absolutely impossible. You buried his body, almost in disgrace, after all the things they said he had done.

You blinked once, and twice more, as he moved closer, slowly presenting himself more and more as the man that once you recognized as your husband.

He was barely standing two feet away when you finally let a shaky breath fall between your lips that was held beneath that huge knot in your throat. And when his mouth opened again to say he was sorry, you used both hands to push him back with all the force you could muster, which wasn't much to be honest.

Frank merely swayed, and you pushed him again, harder, and he let you, and a third one.

“Let it out, sweetheart.”

On the fourth push, you started sobbing uncontrollably, and his arms finally surrounded you, holding you tight against his chest.

“Shh, shh. It's okay.”

“I hate you,” you repeated thickly a few times, falling apart against his hoodie, balling the fabric in your hands.

“I know, I know… I'm sorry.”

You felt his lips pressed on your head and a hand soothing up and down your back. He kept you like that until your heart settled at a normal pace and there weren't more tears to shed, at least for now.

With a little hesitation, you pulled your head back to take a good look at him again, calmer this time.

Locking eyes with him, you brought your hands up and framed his face, rubbing your thumbs on the bags of his eyes that were tear-soaked just as yours.

“You coming home?” Of all the questions you could have asked, that was the only one that mattered to you.

“I can't. It's not safe,” his gaze fell low.

“Will it ever be?”

“I don't know.”

“You're an asshole, you know that?” He nodded in your hands, and you released his face, turning your back on him in frustration, “you lied to me and left me alone to deal with all this. I've mourned you… and for what? You should've stayed dead.”

You didn't mean that, but emotions got the best out of you at that moment.

“Please, Frank. I miss you,” you begged right after, letting out a sob.

“I wish I could, baby. I wanna tell you everything and go home with you and Lisa, but there are still people out there that would hurt you if they knew I was alive.”

“Then, tell me what to do, I'll help you. Whatever you need,” you wiped your face and shifted on your boots again to face him.

“You can't. One of us has to take care of her, and I'm already dead.”

“You let her see you, didn't you?”

“I just…” his lips twitched nervously, “I saw her at the bookstore, and she smiled at me and waved. And I had to see that again. I tried to stay away, but she's just…”

“She's perfect and misses you too,” you finished his sentence, fitting your hands on either side of his neck, capturing the warmth of his skin. “Come by the house later at night, even if it's just for a little bit, just to hold her for a while.”

“I wanna. I really do, but if anyone catches a whiff that I'm around…”

“Nobody will. I promise,” you whispered and brought your fingers up to move his curls away from his forehead, “look at you… you look so different, I could barely recognize you.”

“Dunno know how she did.”

“She’s smart for a two-year-old,” you laughed softly, petting his beard next.

“She got that from you.”

“I don’t know about that,” you sighted as Frank got hold of one of your hands and brought your palm up to his lips.

A tap on the door frame interrupted the moment, and you glanced over your shoulder to see Curt looking apologetic for having to cut your time short.

“Everything good with you two? I need to close up.”

You both nodded.

“Thanks Curt.”

He was a saint. Whatever he did to convince Frank to show up here to see you, it mustn't have been easy.

Frank rode with you and explained everything on the way back home, every single detail without overstating or sugarcoating anything, and you listened quietly without judgment. You always knew he had his reasons, and now they were all out in the open, and you didn’t know how to process all that in that short time frame. You couldn't get behind all of it and wished he had found another way, but you couldn't resent him either.

“Do you still love me after all that?” he asked once you were in the garage.

“Frank,” you stated his name as if it wasn't obvious already that you'd never stop no matter what. “Until the end of time.”

It was a cheesy line from that song you both loved so much.

“Until the stars fall from the sky?”

“Until I die,” you leaned closer and pressed your lips chastely against his, and couldn't help but smile at the prickling of his facial hair.

Then, he cupped your face so tender as his forehead touched yours, staying there a moment in silence, gathering some much-needed courage to face your baby girl.

You went into the house first and when the sitter was gone he came in through the back door.

Lisa was soundly asleep, sucking on her pacifier, in her toddler bed that was converted from her former crib. That same crib Frank built three days before she was born because he got home just in time to see that happen. Then, she spent about three months sleeping in a bassinet next to your bed afterwards anyway. There was no rush, you told him, but he spent a day just putting all that together cause he needed something to do.

You switched the night light on that turned the room into soft blues and yellows, and projected stars and moons across the ceiling as Frank took a seat in the rocking chair.

You carefully picked up Lisa and laid her on her tummy across Frank's chest. She stirred up a little but stayed comfortably curled in daddy's embrace without fussing too much, even tucked her arm underneath his beard.

Your heart swelled watching them both, and you propped yourself on the arm of the chair, tucking your legs over his lap and hugging his neck.