#BJS Replacement Parts

[whollyjoly]

watching mash s11ep4 the joker is wild for the first time and...boy howdy do i have thoughts on bj's trapper complex

[ja3yun]

Prove it to You | L.HS

boyfriend!heeseung x girfriend!reader warnings: smut (mdni), unprotected sex, cream pie, oral (m.rec), nipple play, mentions of insecurities, pet names (baby), they are sickly in love with one another, not proofread, anything else lmk! w.c: 6.5k synopsis: after a dinner with his friends, heeseung is feeling insecure about how well he's doing in the boyfriend department and wants to prove to you that he is the best boyfriend he can be. a/n: hi! it's my beautiful boys birthday!! i was going to make this a birthday themed fic but i figure cute, loving, bj receiving heeseung is just as good. as always, comments and reblogs are appreciated! happy heeseung day everyone <33

“Baby?”

A soft groan, warm and lazy, ripples through the stillness of the room that disguises itself as a hum. Your body, still heavy with sleep, feels the tender weight of a hand shaking your arm gently, followed by the familiar brush of lips against your shoulder. The gesture is soft, loving - but something about the way he calls for you feels different, slightly urgent even though there is no panic in his tone.

“Baby, can you wake up?”

There’s a tremor in Heeseung’s voice, something uneasy in the way his breath catches. He exhales heavily, almost shakily, and even with your eyes still closed, it pulls at your heart. Sleep evaporates from your mind like mist in the morning sun, replaced by a rising wave of concern.

Shuffling beneath the blankets, you force your heavy eyelids open, eyes blurry and hazed with sleep, yet focused on finding him. His face, cast in a soft amber glow from the streetlight outside, looks tired, but more than that - troubled. You blink through the grit in your eyes, the edges of your world soft with drowsiness, but your senses sharpen as you take him in.

“Heeseung, are you okay?” you murmur, voice hushed, still tinged with sleep but now laced with concern. The early morning quiet stretches between you, amplifying every small sound - the rustle of sheets, the quiet hum of the city outside, and the silence that lingers after your question.

Last night, Heeseung had gone out to meet friends for a casual dinner, something you knew he needed after weeks buried in work. But now, the light flush across his cheeks and the pink on the bridge of his nose tells you he’s had a few beers to drink. What it also tells you, though, is that he hasn’t slept it off, which means he just got home this second or can’t sleep with something on his mind. 

Considering he never wakes you up unless something is plaguing him, you���re concluding that it might be the latter.

His hand brushes through your hair, tender fingers sweeping strands back from your face, and for a moment, there’s a flicker of a smile. Even in his unease, he pauses to take in the sight of you like this, soft and unguarded in the dim glow, all the rough edges of the world smoothed out by the stillness of night. For just a second, his worry seems to melt as he looks at you, a constant habit that Heeseung has picked up over the past year of being yours.

“Hee?” you try again, voice a little more awake now, though still gentle. “What’s wrong?”

His eyes drop, his lips part, but hesitation knots the words in his throat. The silence grows heavy, until finally, he speaks, his voice quieter than before, tinged with vulnerability.

“Do you think I’m a good boyfriend?”

The question hangs in the air, and it throws you, making you pause. Confusion settles in your brow as you tilt your head slightly. “What?”

His eyes flick up to meet yours, searching, unsure. “Do you think I’m a good boyfriend? Like…would you say I’m doing enough?”

You sit up slowly, the dregs of sleep finally falling away as you try to process his question. Your hand reaches out instinctively, resting on his chest where his heart beats, steady but tense beneath your touch. “Heeseung, of course I think you’re a good boyfriend. Why would you even ask that?”

The words feel almost inadequate because, to you, Heeseung is so much more than a good boyfriend - he’s everything you could have ever dreamed of. Sure, there are times when you argue, moments when life throws obstacles your way, and things feel heavy. But even in those moments, he never makes you feel anything less than loved. He’s thoughtful in ways that go beyond grand gestures - it's in the quiet moments, like when he remembers the smallest details about your day or when he texts you just to remind you that he’s thinking of you. It’s the way he looks at you when he thinks you don’t notice, how he prioritises your happiness even when he’s tired, always putting you first with a selflessness that makes your heart ache.

Sitting here in the half-light, you can see the weight he’s carrying, the subtle hunch of his shoulders, the way his lips twitch like he’s trying to hold something back. And yet, even in his uncertainty, he’s still reaching out for you, seeking comfort not just for himself but to make sure you’re okay, too. That’s who Heeseung is - someone who loves deeply, who gives even when he feels empty.

Gently, you brush your fingers along the line of his jaw, feeling the familiar warmth of his skin beneath your touch. “Heeseung,” you say softly, your voice steady and full of warmth, “you’re the best boyfriend I could ever ask for. Truly. What’s going on, baby? What’s making you feel like this?”

There’s a flicker of doubt in his eyes, but your words seem to seep into the cracks, easing some of the tension from his face. The quiet that follows is tender, filled with unspoken love, and though you don’t have all the answers yet, you’ll hold him through the storm of his thoughts, as he has done for you so many times before.

Heeseung sighs softly, rubbing the back of his neck as though the words are heavy on his tongue. His gaze flickers away from you briefly, lost somewhere in the dim glow of the room as he gathers his thoughts.

“At dinner…” he begins, his voice quieter, a little shaky, “the girls were talking about their boyfriends. Saying how they don’t pay attention to them, or… ike, don’t really know them. They never ask questions about their day, always show up late to things, or forget important dates. You know, that kind of stuff.”

He pauses, his brows knitting together as his mind drifts back to the conversation, and you can almost see the whirlwind of thoughts spinning in his head, tugging at his insecurities. He’s overthinking now, replaying every single moment from your relationship, each time he might’ve been late or distracted, every little instance where he thinks he might’ve fallen short. You know him too well - this is how Heeseung is. His heart is so full of care that the idea of disappointing you sends him spiralling into self-doubt.

Where he sees gaps, you only see love, commitment, and an attentiveness that most people only dream of. Heeseung has never been that boyfriend - the one who forgets anniversaries, or who doesn’t show up when you need him, or who brushes off your feelings. If anything, he’s the exact opposite.

You remember the countless times he’s sat with you after a long day, listening intently, no matter how tired he was, asking questions and making sure you felt heard. How he never lets a single date slip by without doing something special—whether it’s taking you out for a quiet dinner or leaving a note by the coffee pot before he heads off to work. He remembers the smallest details, the way your eyes light up when you talk about a favourite book or a song, and he’ll bring those things up weeks later, proving that he was paying attention all along.

A faint, incredulous chuckle escapes your lips - not mocking, but pure disbelief. “Baby, you have to understand,” you say, your voice gentle but filled with warmth, “those things? The things they were talking about? That’s what every boyfriend does at some point.”

Heeseung shrinks a little at that, his shoulders hunching slightly as though your words only confirm his worst fears. His face falls, the vulnerability in his expression deepening, and it’s clear his mind is starting to spiral again, pulling him into a pit of self-doubt. But before he can fall too deep, you reach for him, gently placing your hand on his cheek, your thumb brushing over his skin in a soothing gesture.

You don’t let him stew in his thoughts for long. “But you—you’re like that rare 0.01% that is nothing like that,” you continue, your tone firm yet loving. “Hee, you’re so attentive to me. You’re always listening to me, even when I’m banging on about the same thing over and over again. You always show up for me, even when you’re tired or stressed. I don’t think you’ve ever missed a date, let alone forgotten an important one.”

His brows knit together, the tension easing just a fraction as he listens, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. There’s still doubt lingering there, but the warmth in your voice seems to be cutting through it, slowly but surely.

“I mean, you’ve never turned up late to anything - not once,” you add with a soft smile, your hand sliding down to rest on his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your palm. “You’re thoughtful in ways that those girls were probably dreaming about when they were talking. You remember things I’ve forgotten I even told you. And even when things get rough, you never make me feel like I’m alone in it. You’re always there, Heeseung. Always.”

Heeseung exhales, the weight of your words finally starting to settle in, though the remnants of doubt still linger in his eyes. He shakes his head, the smallest of smiles playing on his lips, but you can tell he’s still struggling to shake the thoughts entirely.

“I just…I don’t want to take you for granted. I never want to be that guy who doesn’t pay attention or makes you feel like you’re not important.”

“You could never,” you whisper, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his lips, letting it linger just long enough to feel the warmth of him. “The fact that you want to be a good boyfriend already proves that you are.”

Heeseung lets out a soft laugh, his breath warm against your lips as you peck his lips once more to punctuate your reassurances. He bites his lip, giving you that boyish, slightly embarrassed smile that always makes your heart flutter.

“You think so?” he asks, his voice quieter now, almost like he’s seeking reassurance even though he knows he’s already got it.

You raise an eyebrow playfully, a smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. “I know so,” you tease, letting your fingers trace gentle circles on his chest. “I mean, come on - how many boyfriends out there get worried in the middle of the night about whether they’re doing enough for their girlfriends? You’re basically setting the bar impossibly high for everyone else.”

Heeseung chuckles again, shaking his head in mock disbelief. “Oh, so now I’m the standard, huh?”

“You’re more than the standard, you’re the dream.”

Smiling widely, your boyfriend leans in to kiss you once again, this time more confident and at ease. It’s not like Heeseung to be vulnerable like this, the mix of alcohol and the early morning hours playing a massive part in his sudden change in behaviour. But he is so thankful that you aren’t judging him or deflecting his concerns in a passive moment even though you could have. It speaks volumes of your love and adoration for him, and that makes him feel more loved than anything else in the world.

His petal-soft lips melt with yours, your love blooming through each passing breath and brush of his nose with yours. His palms find a place on your waist as he guides you to crawl onto his lap, the sheets that were keeping you warm in your cocoon of sleep now long gone, the heat from Heeseung’s passion now flooding your blood streams. 

His hands slide up your waist, fingers gently exploring the curve of your sides before resting at the small of your back. The heat of his touch burns through the thin fabric of your sleepwear, making you feel as though your skin might ignite under his fingertips. He pulls you closer, guiding you onto his lap with ease, and you can feel his body radiating warmth beneath you, a quiet strength that grounds you even as your heart races.

The kiss deepens, slow and deliberate, a dance of lips and breath, where neither of you is in a rush, savouring the moment for all it’s worth. His lips move with a softness that’s intoxicating, every caress sending shivers down your spine. He tastes like something familiar, something safe and beautiful—like home.

“I love you so much, baby,” he murmurs into the kiss, his voice rough with longing, each word brushing against your lips like a secret meant only for you. His breath, hot and uneven, fans over your face, and the way he speaks, the intensity in his tone, makes your chest swell with so much emotion you feel like you might burst. It’s a confession he’s made a thousand times, yet each time it feels like the first, igniting a fire inside you that only he can.

If there was ever a reason for your heart to exist, for your lungs to draw breath, it would be to love Heeseung. Your heart is to keep you alive, but if you can't love him like this, there's no reason to exist.

Nodding, you smile against his lips, a soft sound of contentment escaping you as you press closer to his chest, wanting to feel every inch of him, to be as close as physically possible. Your hands find their way into his hair, fingers tangling in the soft strands as you deepen the kiss, pouring all your love into it. “I love you too, Hee,” you whisper between kisses, your voice low, filled with an ache that matches his. “Always.”

His hands tighten around you, holding you as if he’s afraid you might slip away, his kisses becoming more urgent, more desperate. His lips move against yours with a hunger that takes your breath away, and it’s like he’s trying to convey all the things he can’t put into words - the depth of his love, his need for you, how you mean everything to him.

Hands roaming your now alert body, Heeseung grips and caresses every inch of skin he can, his fingers dancing along your back as his nails drag down ever so gently, just enough for you to feel the bite. He needs you under his skin. He needs you part of him. He needs you full stop.

Every brush of his lips, every gentle tug of your lower lip, every graze of his teeth sends a thrill through you, making your skin hum with electricity. His hand moves up to cradle your face, thumb brushing over your cheek as he pulls back just enough to look into your eyes, his gaze dark with emotion, his chest rising and falling with heavy breaths.

“I know we just had a sappy moment and I don’t want this to take away from it, but I’m horny as fuck right now.”

A sharp laugh escapes you, breaking through the intensity of the moment, and you shake your head at Heeseung's bluntness, though the heat in the room is unmistakable. His words might’ve caught you off guard, but they don’t surprise you - it’s just so him to switch from vulnerability to desire with the same raw passion.

You grin at him, your hands still tangled in his hair, and lean in to press a playful kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Oh, really?” you tease, your voice light but laced with that same unspoken tension that’s been building between you. “I never would have guessed with your cock poking my thigh.”

You both look down and see Heeseung’s member semi-hard, concealed only by his boxers. It makes you bite your lip in lust as you reply moments that his thick cock has taken you to the stars, has made you arch your back as your heart tries to leap from your chest and shout how much you love his inches pounding into you.

Heeseung's cheeks flush a deep pink, only adding to the alcohol flush he still has blushing over his features,, but that signature mischievous grin appears on his face, his embarrassment melting into amusement. He lets out a soft chuckle, his eyes flicking between your teasing gaze and the obvious evidence of his desire pressing against you.

"Well," he says, his voice dropping an octave, his hand tightening slightly on your waist, "you can’t blame me, can you? I mean, look at you." His tone is playful, but there’s no mistaking the hunger behind his words as his eyes roam over your body, drinking in every inch of you. His lips find their way to your neck, teeth working in tandem to nip at your skin before he speaks again. “Y’know, I should prove that I’m a good boyfriend, not just say it.”

A part of you wants to tell him that he proves it every day, that he is even proving it right now, but you know what this will lead to and you’ll be damned if you don’t let him continue. So you play along, smirking as you feel his mouth move south, kissing over your collarbone.

“I think you should,” you giggle out in a moan as his teeth sink into you. The sound escapes your lips unbidden, a mixture of laughter and desire, and you feel his cock twitch at the sound, a primal response that only fuels the fire igniting between you both. Any noise you make is Heeseung’s favourite song.

With a swift motion, Heeseung peels your tank top off, revealing your breasts. He ogles at them, memorising every mark, line, and curve of them as if he doesn’t study them every day. If he was set the challenge to draw them from memory, he could pass with flying colours.

Attaching his mouth to your right nipple, he teasingly bites around the peak and flicks it with his tongue before wrapping his lips around it, sucking gently as if he’s savoring a fine wine. The sensation sends an electric jolt through you, arching your back and pushing your chest further into him, a silent plea for more. Heeseung's hands cup your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your sensitive skin, heightening the delicious tension that spirals between you.

“God, you’re beautiful,” he murmurs against your skin, his breath hot and ragged, punctuating each word with soft kisses. The way he admires you - like you’re a masterpiece and he’s not even worthy to be standing in the museum you decorate - fills you with a sense of exhilaration. You can’t help but tilt your head back, surrendering to the waves of pleasure crashing over you as he lavishes attention on your body.

His mouth moves from your breast to your collarbone, trailing kisses that leave a path of fire in their wake. As he nips at your skin, you feel a rush of warmth pool low in your belly, the heady mix of desire and adoration overwhelming. Heeseung's fingers dig into your hips, anchoring you to him, and you can feel the way his body responds to yours - hard and insistent against your thigh. 

“Am I proving myself?” he asks playfully, pulling back to look into your eyes, his gaze dark with lust and mischief. His lips glisten slightly, and you can’t help but admire how he looks at this moment - wild and undone, completely lost in the taste of you.

“More than you know,” you breathe, a smile creeping onto your lips as you lean in closer, brushing your nose against his. The closeness feels intoxicating, every heartbeat syncing with his own. “But I think there’s a way you can really prove it to me.”

With a playful glint in your eye, you push him back gently, manoeuvring him to lie flat against the soft sheets. You straddle him, your knees pressing into the mattress on either side of his hips, and you can feel his heat radiating beneath you. The shift in position gives you a sense of power, an exhilarating thrill that makes your pulse race.

Leaning down, you place a teasing kiss on his lips before trailing your mouth lower, down his chest, savouring every inch of skin you encounter. You take your time, letting your lips brush against his abs, feeling the taut muscles beneath your fingertips as you draw nearer to where you want to be.

“This doesn’t feel like me proving I’m a good boyfriend if you’re doing all the work,” he laughs, his voice rich with playful sarcasm.

“Just relax,” you murmur, looking up at him through your lashes, a smirk playing on your lips. “I’ve got this.” With that, you pull down his boxers, revealing him fully, the sight of his arousal making your heart race even faster. The air is thick with tension and anticipation, and as you wrap your fingers around him, the thrill of what’s to come sends shivers down your spine.

“Seriously, Y/N, why don’t I-”

You interrupt him, your voice playful yet sultry, “I’m literally in love with your cock, so if you want to ‘prove’ you’re a good boyfriend, you’ll let me suck it.” You smile innocently up at your boyfriend, and the mischievous glint in your eyes only heightens the intensity of the moment. When you say you love his cock, that isn’t even enough to convey just how much you worship it.

For the past year, this single cock has taken you to heaven and back, lifting you past the clouds and into galaxies that haven’t even been explored yet. Heeseung has done more for your pleasure than any self-exploration or rose toy could ever hope to give you. If he wants to talk about women’s complaints about their boyfriends, unsatisfying sex is more common than not, and he has yet to disappoint you.

When you first started dating, the chemistry between you was so strong that you found yourselves lost in each other’s arms on the very first date. Even then, while you still had so much to learn about one another - your likes and dislikes, how you moved with one another - Heeseung somehow pressed every button inside you, fine-tuning spots you hadn’t even discovered yet. He is so attuned to your needs, both physically and mentally.

That is how you know he is a cut above the rest.

With a teasing grin, you peel his boxers down further, exposing him completely to your gaze. You take a moment to admire him, the way his length stands proud and eager, glistening slightly with anticipation. It’s a sight that always sends a rush of heat through you, and you can’t help but feel a thrill of excitement at the thought of what’s to come.

Leaning in closer, you let your breath ghost over the tip of his cock, watching as he shudders in response. The tension in his body is palpable, and it fuels your desire even more. You give him a slow, teasing lick, starting from the base and moving up to the tip, taking your time to savour the taste of him. A low groan escapes his lips, and the sound makes your heart race, sending a thrill of pleasure coursing through you.

“Y/N,” he gasps, his voice thick with desire, “you really don’t have to—”

But you cut him off again, looking at him with wide, playful eyes. “I want to,” you assure him, your voice barely a whisper as you lean in, capturing his tip in your mouth. The warmth of you envelops him, and you hollow your cheeks, sucking gently as you begin to take him deeper.

Heeseung’s hands find their way to your hair, fingers threading through it as he guides you softly, his breaths turning into heavy pants. You love the way he watches you, eyes dark and filled with a mix of admiration and lust. As you take him deeper, you let your tongue swirl around the tip, teasing and tantalizing him, every flick sending shockwaves of pleasure through his body.

Gathering your hair into a ponytail, threading his fingers through your strands, making sure he doesn’t miss a bit, he begins to tie your hair up. He does this; one, so he can see your pretty lips wrapping around him, and two, because he knows how annoyed you get when your hair is in your face. It’s partly the reason why he always carries a bobble on his wrist, for spontaneous times like this. 

The black bobble has come in handy more times than he can count; parties, work events, in the car, you name it. You love to suck his cock, there was no denying it in his mind, hence why he is always prepared.

With each slow movement, you can feel Heeseung’s tension building. You watch him closely, revelling in the way his mouth falls open slightly as if he’s struggling to find the words to express what he’s feeling. His chest rises and falls, each breath coming faster than the last as you continue to work your mouth around him. The way his body reacts to you only serves to heighten your own arousal, the heat pooling low in your belly.

“God, you’re so perfect,” he breathes, his voice shaky as he tries to keep control. You can sense his yearning, a mix of desire and admiration that makes you feel powerful. With every moment that passes, you grow more determined to show him just how much he means to you, how deeply you crave him.

You start to pick up the pace, your head moving faster as you slide him deeper into your mouth, allowing your lips to wrap around him snugly. You can feel the muscles in his thighs tense, his body urging you on as he struggles not to bust a load in your mouth right here and now. The raw desperation in his eyes only ignites your need for him, and you find yourself lost in the rhythm of it, moving in sync with the unspoken connection between you.

“Y/N, please, I’ll not last long,” he murmurs, his voice thick with longing as he bites his lip, a look of unrestrained pleasure crossing his features. You can tell he’s holding back, wanting to let go but trying to let you take your time. The contrast of his restraint against your eagerness sends a rush of heat through you, and you can feel the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips as you squeeze his thighs.

Instead of slowing down, you push him fully down your throat, the bell of his cock sitting exactly where your voicebox is located, and you swallow. It’s something you know he loves more than anything and thanks to a lot of practice paired with patience from your boyfriend, you perfected it. 

Your glands suck him in, your throat gagging at the intrusion of his cock as it tries to gulp down, Heeseung thrashes beneath you, holding in his breath and he tenses, toes curling in desperation. 

“Jesus, fuck,” he gasps out through gritted teeth, the intensity of the sensation overwhelming him. His fingers grip your hair tighter, a mix of pleasure and desperation coursing through him as he feels you take him deeper than ever. The warm heat enveloping him is almost too much to bear, and he can't help but thrust his hips slightly, seeking that delicious friction that drives him wild.

You can feel every shudder and quake of his body, the way he fights against the urge to let go. With each swallow, you tighten your throat around him, your body instinctively reacting to his need. The vibrations from your throat send shockwaves through his entire length, and you can tell he’s teetering on the edge of bliss.

“Y/N,” he moans, his voice laced with an intoxicating mix of desperation and awe. “You’re so fucking perfect.” The way he breathes your name is music to your ears, fueling your desire even more. The rasp in his tone along with the tiny giggle that pushes out, showcases the glee he is feeling within himself. It’s a beautiful contrast to how this rude awakening started.

Determined to push him over the edge, you pull back just slightly, letting the tip of him rest on your tongue as you swirl it around his knob, dipping it past his slit a few times before diving back down, taking him fully once more. Each movement is deliberate, each glide of your lips sending him further into the abyss of pleasure. The sound of your lips slurping and the wetness of your mouth fills the room, creating an intoxicating rhythm that both of you are losing yourself in.

“Please, stop,” he begs, his eyes squeezing shut as he loses himself in the moment. “I can’t hold back much longer.” You revel in the power you have over him, the way your actions leave him breathless and yearning. It’s a heady feeling, one that makes you want to do this forever, to draw out his pleasure as long as you can.

But just as you think he might tumble over the edge, Heeseung suddenly pulls you off, his chest heaving with laboured breaths as he fights to regain control. His gaze is dark, filled with desire and a hint of desperation, and it sends a thrill through you as he locks eyes with you.

With a swift motion, he pulls your face up to his, capturing your lips in a feverish kiss. It’s a clash of passion, a mix of lingering sweetness and raw hunger as his mouth moves against yours, igniting a fire deep within you. He can taste the remnants of your earlier actions on his tongue, a tantalising reminder of what just transpired, and it makes him crave you even more.

As you kiss, his fingers find home between your legs, feeling how wet you are just from sucking his cock. The feeling makes him smirk, his ego growing along with his arousal. He pushes your shorts and underwear to the side and you gasp into his mouth as you feel the heat of his member sliding against your heat, the sensation sending electric sparks coursing through your body. The intimacy of the moment wraps around you both, intensifying the connection between you as you can feel his need pressing against you.

“God, I need you so fucking bad,” Heeseung breathes between kisses, his voice rough and laced with longing. You can feel the urgency in his words, the way he’s teetering on the brink of desire, and it only fuels your own craving for him. The way his body reacts to yours, the heat radiating off him, makes your heart race faster, and you instinctively press against him, seeking that sweet friction. “Let me fuck you, please, baby.” Heeseung is whiny and desperate, which means you know he’s close, seeking out that sweet release.

You break the kiss just long enough to whisper, “Fuck me, please, Hee.” Your words are barely audible but equally as yearning as they hang in the air between you, filled with unspoken promises and undeniable need. The invitation ignites something primal in him, and you can see the flicker of determination in his eyes as he moves to claim you, each moment stretching out as you both surrender to the overwhelming connection that binds you together.

With a sudden urgency, Heeseung captures your lips again, his mouth moving against yours with a fervour that sends shivers down your spine. He pulls you closer, his hands roaming over your skin, igniting every nerve ending as he explores your body. His lips leave yours, trailing kisses down your neck, his warm breath sending delightful chills across your skin. When his mouth finds your breasts again, he takes your right nipple into his mouth, sucking gently before nibbling around the peak, his tongue swirling and teasing as he sends waves of pleasure through you.

Slipping into your heat, Heeseung’s cock finally stretches you open, a gasp in harmony orchestrating around your bedroom. Your eyes roll back as he fills you to the hilt, the exquisite sensation sending electric pulses of pleasure coursing through every part of your body. Heeseung pauses for just a moment, letting you adjust to his size, his breath coming in heavy pants as he watches you. His expression is a mix of desire and reverence, as if he’s savouring this just as much as you are.

“God, you feel amazing,” he murmurs, his voice thick with need as he slowly pulls back, only to plunge deep again. Each thrust is a slow exploration at first, deliberate and measured, as he seeks to bring you both to that blissful peak. The sensation of his cock sliding against your inner walls sends waves of pleasure through you, igniting every nerve ending. Heeseung's eyes never leave your face, drinking in the sight of you lost in ecstasy, each gasp and moan drawing him deeper into the moment.

Heeseung's hands grip your hips, fingers digging into your flesh as he finds a steady rhythm, pushing deeper with each thrust, trying to prove to you just how great of a boyfriend he can be, how he will give you everything he has; mind, body, and spirit. 

Your body instinctively responds, arching into him, craving more as the world around you fades into nothingness. The sounds of skin slapping against skin echo in the quiet room, punctuated by the symphony of your shared gasps and moans. It’s a primal dance of desire, every thrust driving you further into ecstasy, the overwhelming connection between you deepening with each movement.

“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he groans, his voice low and husky, thick with pleasure as he quickens his pace. It doesn’t matter how many times he fucks you, your walls will always welcome him in the most delicious way. 

You can feel the tension building within you, each powerful thrust causing your heart to race and your breath to hitch. The urgency in his thrusts builds, each movement charged with desperation and longing as he seeks to drive you both to the brink. He leans down, capturing your lips in another heated kiss, his tongue dancing with yours, mingling your breaths and surrendering to the intoxicating heat that envelops you both.

As he kisses you, his hands roam down to your thighs, lifting your legs higher to allow him even deeper access. The shift in angle sends shockwaves of pleasure surging through you, your moans mingling with his as he hits that sweet spot inside you. You can feel the pressure building, the familiar tight coil of pleasure winding tighter and tighter within you, urging you closer to release.

“Y/N,” he breathes against your lips, his voice low and breathy, filled with both desire and admiration. “You’re everything to me.” The words resonate deep within your chest, and they only serve to heighten the intensity of your yearning. “I want you to cum for me,” he murmurs, his fingers finding your clit, rubbing in perfect time with his thrusts, his thumb pressing down on your sensitive bud.

The sensation of his fingers combined with the friction of his cock sends you spiralling toward the edge. With each stroke of his cock and each flick of his fingers, the pressure within you intensifies, your body craving that release as he pushes you closer and closer to the precipice. You can feel the heat pooling in your core, a delicious tension building that threatens to overflow.

“Hee, I’m so close,” you gasp, nails digging into his back as the sensations overwhelm you. Heeseung groans in response, his thrusts growing more frantic, his desire matching your own as he chases that high alongside you. “Just a little more,” he urges, his voice thick with need, every thrust a promise of the pleasure to come.

Your breaths come in sharp bursts as the pleasure builds to an unbearable peak, the world around you narrowing to just the two of you. With every movement, Heeseung brings you closer to the edge, the rhythm of his hips and the precision of his fingers drawing you nearer to bliss. Your body begins to tremble, the coil inside you winding tighter as Heeseung’s pace quickens, urgency fueling every thrust.

“Let go for me, baby,” he whispers, his voice heavy with need, and that simple command pushes you over the edge. With a cry that echoes through the room, your body explodes in pleasure, waves of ecstasy crashing over you as you shatter beneath him. The sensation washes over you, and as you lose yourself to it, you can feel Heeseung following closely behind, his own release spilling into you as he groans your name, ropes of his cum painting your walls, the heat adding to your pleasure and making your cunt try and swallow each drop. The two of you are lost in the moment, the world outside forgotten, and doubts in Heeseung’s mind now vanished, as you find your bliss together in that perfect union.

As the waves of pleasure finally begin to subside, you find yourself still tangled together, your breaths mingling in the warm air. Heeseung’s arms are wrapped securely around you, holding you close as his heartbeat gradually slows, though the lingering electricity between you remains palpable. You can feel the aftershocks of your climax coursing through you along with the final jumps of his cock, each pulse a gentle reminder of the ecstasy you just shared.

Heeseung gently pulls out, and a soft whimper escapes your lips at the loss, but he’s quick to pull you into his embrace, cradling you against his chest. His fingers brush through your hair, and you can’t help but smile, the afterglow of your connection illuminating your heart. “So, did I prove myself,” he breathes, a satisfied grin spreading across his face as he meets your gaze. There’s a playful glimmer in his eyes, one that reminds you of how much he relishes in these moments with you.

“You never had to prove anything, Hee. You prove yourself every single day.” Your voice is earnest and raw, meaning every word. Your hand comes up to cradle his cheek as you stroke his flushed face. “I love you so much, baby. Please never doubt yourself like that again.” 

Heeseung’s eyes soften at your words, warmth flooding his features as he leans into your touch, relishing the way your fingers caress his skin. The sincerity in your voice wraps around him like a comforting blanket, easing away any lingering insecurities. “You really mean that?” he asks, his voice barely above a whisper, tinged with vulnerability. 

“Of course, I do,” you assure him, the depth of your affection pouring into each syllable. “You are everything I’ve ever wanted and more. I don’t just say it for the sake of it; you really are perfect for me, Hee.”

His heart swells at your declaration, a grin breaking through the remnants of his earlier doubt. “Well, I guess that means I should keep doing what I’m doing, yeah?” He chuckles lightly, the sound brightening the atmosphere between you.

“Definitely, “ you giggle, kissing his chest as you settle your head there, listening to his heartbeat, the one that beats only for you. “Just keep being mine.”

“Always.”

_____

perm taglist: @immortalvee @sunpov @heeseungspookie @strawberrysavi @monstanctiny21

@diorsyun @heexzbae @yzzyhee @baekhyunstruly @zeeloveshee

@haechonly @berryblog @no-mannerism @jaehoonii

@notevenheretbh1 @shawnyle @addictedtohobi @jiminie-08

@emberuby @nctislifue @lilyuwon @skzenhalove

@heeshlove @idkdykilr @chocminteu @y4wnjunz @rikibun

@ivesti @parksunghoonsgf @branchrkive @brownsugarbaybee

@xxbluestrifexx @bambangan @iluvikeu @deobitifull

@yawnazzz @st1llm0nster @woorcve @heeseungsbm

@star-hoon @heelee-01 @wonnienyang @alternativelix

[gojipink]

teach me!

ஐ ft. alhaitham

ஐ summary. alhaitham teaches you how to give him a blowjob!

ஐ warnings. N!SFW, mdni, fem!reader, finger sucking, fem. pet names. 1.6k words

ஐ notes. part of my bj mini series! find the other parts here!

alhaitham’s strong hands tug at the towel that’s wrapped around your body, pulling the cloth off you while pulling you closer to him as your lips yield to his onslaught of fiery kisses. you struggle to keep up with him as you tug onto his hair, still damp from the bath you just took together. breaking away from his lips, you peek down at his stiff length; cock flushed and already oozing at the tip all because you innocently wondered out loud how it would feel to have him in your mouth.

“is it…will it fit?” you hesitantly ask while staring down at your boyfriend’s heavy cock, standing proudly against his toned abs.

The dim, candle-lit bedroom creates an atmosphere so sensual it was almost suffocating.

alhaitham exhales a quiet laugh, his big hands coming up to cup your cheeks to tilt your head up to look at him, “we’ll take it slow, love. you don't have to do any more than you think you can take.” 

you pout at him, “i wanna make you feel good though, wanna be able to take all of it-” 

“and we’ll work up to that,” he reassures with a teasing glint in his eye, his thumbs circling your cheeks lovingly. “it doesn't matter how much you're able to take, it’ll feel good regardless, i promise.”

you hum apprehensive, “okay but you have to help me ‘haitham, have to tell me how you like it,” you bargain as your hands come up to rest on his muscular stomach, fingertips shyly tracing the distinct grooves on each muscle. the glow of the candles highlighting every prominent feature on his body, making him look more handsome than ever.

one of his hands trace down your face to rub at your shoulder reassuringly, “i will, love. we’ll practice first, hm?” you give him a small nod as he slides a hand down your jaw, his thumb tracing over your bottom lip before tapping it lightly. “open,” he whispers.

your body reacts before your brain fully processes his words, lips parting immediately with your tongue poking out just slightly to kitten lick at his fingertip. his lips lift into a small smile as he watches you test the waters, his dick involuntarily jumping at the feeling of your soft tongue. 

“see? you know what to do, i don't even need to give you any instructions, do i?” he says lowly, your head becomes a little fuzzy with his praise. feeling a little bolder, you inch forward allowing his thumb to fully slip inside your mouth, your lips wrapping around the digit. alhaitham draws a deep breath in, his eyes becoming half-lidded watching you slightly bob your head around his finger, tongue massaging at the pad of his thumb. his hard cock twitches between your bodies, the leaky tip dribbling pre-cum on the floor. 

he hums a little absentmindedly before pulling out his thumb and replacing it with his index and middle finger. you moan around his fingers, mouth feeling more stuffed as his fingers play and massage around your tongue.

he stares with a hungry gaze at the lewd sight in front of him; your mouth sucking around his two fingers as if it were candy while you look up at him with unfocused eyes, small whines escape you as he plays with your tongue. 

he slides his fingers towards the back of your throat causing you to choke a little in surprise, your fingernails dig into his defined muscles as he repeats the action, slowly allowing your throat to relax and accommodate his long fingers. 

“did someone else teach you? is that why you're already so good, huh?” he teases in a low voice, your cheeks flaring with embarrassment at his mock accusation. you look up at him with doe eyes, eyebrows slightly knitted together, cheeks still hallowed around his fingers as you try to shake your head. 

alhaitham chuckles as he rhythmically slides his fingers in and out between your plush lips, “just teasing you, my love. you’re doing so well for me, aren't you?”

you whimper around his fingers, mind growing dizzy with need as his praises make your slick smear onto your naked thighs. thighs involuntarily pressing together for friction, you hardly even recognize your own actions until alhaitham huffs out a small laugh as he glances down. 

“oh, my sweet girl,” he coos, “you like sucking my fingers that much?” 

 you moan out a small mhm around him, your mind clouding over with a lustful haze, only growing more desperate to feel more of him, to taste more of him. 

feeling emboldened by his positive reactions, your hands drift away from his middle until they loosely grip at the base of his aching cock. 

his teeth grit together at the sudden feeling of your hands on him, your soft strokes timed perfectly to match your head as you bob along his fingers. 

“mmh- you want it that bad? think youre ready to try it out, angel?” he reaches his fingers towards your throat again, relishing in the way he can feel the vibrations of your small affirming “mhm”, the sensation making his dick twitch in your hold.

drawing his fingers out of your mouth, he leans in to press a deep kiss to your lips.

“take it slow, okay? i’ll talk you through it,” he whispers against your lips. 

you whisper a small okay as he gently takes your hands away from his dick in order to keep you steady while you slowly drop to your knees. 

alhaitham takes his throbbing cock into his hand, giving himself a few pumps to alleviate the pressure that was already causing his heavy balls to tighten. paired with the sight of you on your knees in front of him, ready and so eager to do anything he asks, he knows that he's not going to last as long as he wishes to. 

“do it just like how you were sucking on my fingers, it’s the same thing. don't be scared of it, i won't hurt you,” he instructs soothingly, one hand coming up to massage at your neck while the other guides his swollen tip to very lightly trace your bottom lip. 

nodding up at him, you open your mouth and poke your tongue out to swipe along his leaking slit, noticing the way alhaitham’s abs clench and how tightly he flexes his jaw. mimicking the way your tongue played with his fingers, you swirl your tongue around his sensitive cock head before taking the tip into your mouth, cheeks hollowed to create a tight suction. 

“ugh f-fuck-! just mmh- just like that, doing so well for me, hm?” he pants out, his eyes locked on the way your lips wrap around his mushroom tip combined with the unfocused look in your eyes as you drink up every instruction and every reaction from him. 

you hum around his cock making his fingers tighten around the hairs that lay at the nape of your neck. his tight grip tangled in your hair turns to gentle tugging as he slowly begins to guide your movements and the timing of your bobbing. 

struggling to fit all of his thick cock into your mouth, you wrap a hand around the base and twist up to whatever your mouth can’t reach in time with your mouth. 

alhaitham’s head tilts back, eyes closing for just a moment, allowing himself to wholeheartedly focus on how your tongue feels. the dizzying contrast of how your tongue feels when the soft muscle massages at the protruding vein on the underside of his cock on each downward stroke versus the way your tongue swirls around his sensitive tip when you pull back up has alhaitham’s teeth gnashed together as he desperately tries to stifle the guttural groans you pull from him. 

“j-just like that, mmph-! good girl, princes-mmh-! doing s-so good f’me,” he chokes out, tilting his head back down to watch you as that familiar flame of white hot pleasure starts to lick up his spine. “gonna cum just like this ugh, wanna swallow it?” 

you look up at him with lust filled eyes as you moan affirmatively around his pulsing cock making his lips part in a silent moan as his eyebrows knit together, sweat dripping from his neck pooling at his sharp collarbones. 

“oh just like that, angel, oh fuck, c-cumming-!” 

it's a messy scene filled with saliva and creamy cum as his heavy load leaks out the corners of your mouth while alhaitham’s grip on your hair forces your head still while he shallowly bucks his hips into your stuffed mouth. 

he pants harshly as he leaves his cock nestled against your tongue, flinching slightly from the pricks of overstimulation each time he feels you swallow, the action making your suction even tighter paired with the feeling of the back of your tongue pressing hard against his tip.

coming down from his high with a sigh he gently untangles his fingers out of your hair and slowly pulls his half-hard cock away from your lips, smiling when you let out a small aaah to show him you swallowed everything he gave you. 

bringing a thumb to the corners of your lips to wipe away the smears of cum that leaked out, you surprise him when you catch his wrist and lick away the excess collected on the pad of his thumb. 

“you-” he starts, a little surprised at your bold action before huffing out a laugh as he helps you back up to your feet. pressing you against his chest as he brings his hands up to cup your cheeks pulling you in for a sweet kiss. 

you lightly pull away from him, “was that okay?” you shyly as you tilt your head at him waiting for his praise. 

he shakes his head softly smiling at you, feeling his cock twitch back to life at your innocent behavior, “better. better than just ‘okay’, my love. always.”

[taintedcigs]

as promised.... here's a firefighter!steve thought that hasn't left my mind (warnings: 18+ minors dni, bj, praises, filthy!)

firefighter!steve who meets you on the job, who is all flirty when he sees you... so much so that his captain reprimands him, but none of that matters when you give him your number, promising him a date.

rosy lips curling into a full-on grin, bowing at you with a wink as he runs his hands through his slicked up hair in excitement.

Maybe it's the uniform or his charm, but it doesn't matter, because you're back at his apartment the second the date is over, exploring each other's bodies, hands everywhere, kisses all over each other's skin.

It's a miracle the two of you make it to his couch, and maybe if he hadn't talked about his job a lot, how much he saved people, how much he took care of everyone around him, you wouldn't immediately be on your knees, palming him through his uniform.

But you want to take care of him, want to help him relax, ease his worries.

"W-what are you doin'?" he questions, words half-slurred, eyes half-shut, cock stirring at your movements, low whines he can't seem to hush making you grin.

"Must be so tiring, saving all those people, taking care of everyone else...." You flutter your lashes, not wasting any time to unzip him, your eyes widen at his sheer size, admiring it.

It's bigger, much thicker than you anticipated, veins apparent with how hard he is, but it doesn't stop your slow strokes as his rosy lips slightly part in awe.

"Nobody takes care of you, do they, Stevie?" You hum, not wasting any time to bring your lips onto his hardened cock, soft kisses plastered all over, he wants to protest, but it's not even believable.

"But I was going to-"

"Sshhh, we have all the time in the world, let me take care of you, pretty boy," you hush him quickly, tongue swiping along his length, earning a grunt from him, loud, much louder than he's ever been, and you can see him slipping, going into a trance, engulfed in desire.

It's kitten licks at first, and even with that Steve can feel his entire body shake, the growing intensity of his fervor makes him curse under his breath.

He can't help it, you look so fucking pretty taking care of him, lustful gaze eating him up, tongue lapping up hungrily.

All he can do is whine, beg, and call out your name as merely a grunt. it's surely pathetic, but it drives you insane, plump lips finally wrapping around his cock, sliding up and down his length, hand flying to stroke the parts of him your mouth can't cover.

"You're so, so big, Stevie," you hum, all sultry and sweet, he can't help the ungodly noises that escape his bubblegum lips.

"Baby..." he calls out, weak, and you respond by wrapping another hand around his cock, it's all soft and delicate because he knows he's going to explode soon.

He doesn't even attempt to push your head down further, he can't, his balls are tight, full of cum, waiting to paint your pretty little throat.

All he wants.

You bob your head up and down, gagging with his size while your hand tugs at his cock a bit harder this time, you can almost feel him twitch on your hot tongue, suckling while all Steve can do is let out a "fuck, baby," and a few of "shit, sweetheart," feeling his balls draw up, throbbing length covered in your spit.

Hands replace your mouth as you release him with a pop sound, and Steve looks down at you curious, you meet his gaze, running his red tip against your lips, collecting what's left of his pre-cum with a few laps of your tongue.

He watches in pure admiration, how ethereal you look like this, the gaze you have on him downright pornographic, and all he can do is whine, while his eyes roll to the back of his head, entire body buzzing with pleasure.

You lick your lips happily, letting his salty semen engulf your tastebuds, "tastes so good, Steve." You praise, hand continuing to tug at his veiny cock, his mouth forming an 'o' shape.

"F-fuck... g-gonna cum, sweets," he warns with a violent grunt, making you get to work again, suckling on his cock like your favorite candy, telling him to cum, pretty praises leaving your lips, and all Steve can do is growl, lost in his own desires, in you.

"S-shit, shit, shit! Gonna fill that pretty mouth up-" he can't even finish his sentence, and you continue, whimpering around his cock, getting him to the edge, making him explode inside your cheeks, warm and thick cum flooding all the way back to your throat.

You give him a small smile right after you swallow all of him, lewd gaze meeting his while he keeps repeating how perfect you are.

His good girl.

He grabs you by your chin to make you look up at him, it's downright sinful, much more in control than he was before, you can feel your thighs dampening. "I have to return the favor, sweetheart, don't you think?"

You nod, almost in trance, all the confirmation he needs before he swiftly picks you up, throwing you over his shoulders like it's no big deal.

"Show you how strong and good firefighters are with their hands, hmmm?" He hums wickedly, carrying you to his bedroom.

[tiredandoptimistic]

Genuinely one of my favorite details in MASH is how every character manages to display their unique identity through clothes, despite the uniform. They've all got a couple personal garments of civilian clothing mixed in with their preferred ways of modifying their fatigues, and that's so cool.

Hawkeye wears his undershirt untucked and his overshirt unbuttoned, plus he removed his epaulettes (Trapper is more or less the same). Radar has his overshirt unbuttoned but still tucks in his undershirt, and he wears that iconic hat that's definitely not standard regulation. Henry has his fishing gear or college sweater, and only pulls out the proper uniform shirt and hat if big brass are coming to camp. Frank and Charles both button and tuck in their shirts, but Frank usually wears his hat while Charles does not. Potter buttons his shirt, but never tucks it in. Margaret starts out dressing pretty uniform standard, but by the later seasons she usually replaces her shirt with a sweater or sweatshirt of some kind. Klinger, of course, has a variety of iconic fits.

BJ is definitely the most dramatic example, and it feels very intentional that by the later seasons the only part of his uniform he wears are the pants. He's got his iconic pink henley, plus an army shirt he made into a vest or a pair of red suspenders. He never even wears combat boots, it's converse all the way for him! To top it all off, he's got overlong hair and a goofy mustache; that man is showing disrespect for army regulations in every aspect of his physical appearance. It's very similar to Klinger, in my opinion; except BJ skipped right past the veneer of trying to prove he's crazy to "this is what I want to wear and I won't let this fuckass institution police how I'll present myself"

There's just so much character in how all of them choose to express themselves, despite living in a situation intent on stripping them of their individual humanity! I could do individual character analysis for all of their outfits, even though they're supposedly wearing the same thing.

[obsessive-ego]

Pest of the west

Toonjuice x reader

Warning cringe

Gender neutral pronouns, pregnancy is mentioned once, also reader is forced to wear a dress

A shameless episode rewrite, swapping lydia for y/n and making it into a reader insert, I can not stress this enough, I just rewrote the episode to fit what I wanted, If this goes over well i might do more episode rewrites

Toonjuice takes you to the old west to goof off, and shit gets bad when an out law named bully the crud falls in love with you

"Come to the netherworld he said, it'll be fun he said, we'll go to the old west, you could use a good time, god" you grumbled to yourself, here you were handcuffed, wearing the ugliest, largest wedding dress you've ever seen in your life, hell, the size of the dress was the second reason stopping you from running from this cruel fate, the first being the groom. Not only were you handcuffed, your soon to be husband had a vice grip on your arm, a giant bull of a monster, Bully the Crud, you had no idea why this bastard wanted you, or why beetlejuice, scared out of his wits, ditched you to fend for yourself, all you knew was that you were screwed.

...

Finally, friday, it's been a long, rough work week. Between overtime, unreliable coworkers, and your bastard of a boss using you as a punching bag, you were beat.

Home again, you kick off your shoes, toss your bag and coat on the couch, and make the mental note to tidy up later. More importantly, you make your way to your bedroom, eager for the best part of the work day, changing out of your work clothes.

Passing the full-length mirror in your room, out of the corner of your eye, you notice the reflection wasn't yours.

"Hey BJ" you say casually, not bothering to look his way as you dig around your dresser for something more comfortable.

"It's about time you finally came around, babes,"

"Yeah, overtime again," you sigh

"Gross"

"Tell me about mister 'I don't have a job.'" You laugh, turning to the mirror to see that beetlejuice was gone.

"Huh," you mumble, scooping up your change of clothes. "Guess he had things to do?" You mumble.

Just then, you jump as the television in your bedroom turns on, loud static noises buzz from the speakers before an image settles on screen.

"Beetlejuice?"

Your television lights up showing a desert like scenery, with cactus, wired fences, cow skulls, and there was beetlejuice, dressed in cowboy attire

"That's my name, and cow poking is my game,Are you tired of the same old same old boring modern breather lifestyle?"

"Yeah" you chuckle

"Are ya in desperate need for a change of pace? Then mosey on down to the netherworld's wild west rude ranch, conveniently located in tombstone scareizona"

"There's a wild west in the netherworld? Like cowboys and stuff?" The ghoul had your full attention now, maybe sometime goofing off in the netherworld could do you some good, and the wild west would seem like something new and fun.

"Cowboys, cowghouls, just spout those magic b words, and we'll be ghost town bound"

what's the worst that could happen?

"Beetlejuice beetlejuice beetlejuice!" You shout in a hurry, and in a flash you were gone, your change of clothes now abandoned on the floor where you once stood.

...

And there you were in the scenery you saw on your television, sand, cactus, cow skulls, all the cliches of an old west movie. Your work clothes now replaced with more appropriate attire, a black cowboy hat, with a matching vest, a soft blue coloured puffy sleeved shirt, with a dusty blue neckerchief, black pants, with a big skull shaped belt, and of course some big black boots, you look liked you walked out of freddy pharkas frontier pharmacist, but appreciated the wardrobe change, it was always so fun when your clothes changed when beetlejuice dragged you into the netherworld, it was something you grew to look forward to with each trip. Your adoration for the new look was short-lived as you glanced around, unable to locate your friend.

"Beetlejuice?"

Did he ditch you?

"Oh bury me~ on the lone prairie~"

The ground next to you shakes before beetlejuice's head pops up from the dirt and unearths the rest of himself. "Welcome to the netherwest babes! I'm your ghost host with the most, should you have any questions, I'll be sure awnser them, as obscurely as possible" the ghoul proudly proclaims as he struts away from the grave he pulled himself out of.

"So this is the netherwest, it looks fun"

"Of course, babes, it has everything an old west motife should have, sun, sand, more cliches, then you can shake a stick at," the ghost hollers, shaking a stick at a cow skull

"Sounds great, beej," you chuckle, grabbing his arm, eager to see the sights, and get your mind off your work week.

"And dont you worry toots, if you're fretting on being bush wacked by bad guys, you're fretting for nothing"

"Oh? You some kind of old West hero?" You chucke, amused by his sudden confidence.

"You kidding, babes? Nobody messes with the pest of the west, I'll show ya what I mean later, " he cackles leading you into town

"Pest is right" you smile

...

The two of you were having a blast, beetlejuice eagerly showing you the sights, dragging you around town, you both were laughing and carrying on, you really needed this after such a shitty work week, you could always rely on beetlejuice to change your mood for the better.

It was all fun and games until your ghost, with the most, got kicked by a horse into a trough of dirty water. You were trying not to laugh at him as you helped him out.

"This has got to be the closest thing I've taken ta a bath in months," he grumbled

"It's surely an improvement." You laugh, hoisting your friend out of the water,

"Excuse me" an unfamiliar voice interrupts the two of you "allow me to introduce myself" standing in front of you was a man shaped like a dartboard and a tiny purple guy who's shirt was way too long for him.

"Howdy there stranger, The name's casualty, hop along casualty, I'm the mayor of this here tombstone and this is fester, we all in the market for a new sheriff, know anybody who'd be intrested in such a noble and HIGH paying job?"

"What-" was all you managed to get out before beetlejuice perked up

"DO I? Look no further, I am the slob for the job!" Beetlejuice lunges forward, eager to shake the mayor's hand before you pull him back

"Uh, beej? You a law man? Do you even know any laws?"

"Dont rob people"

"Oof, that's on me, I set the bar too low, but weren't we just here to have fun? And besides sheriff? Ya know, that's a lot of hard work, " the ghoul's one weakness. Maybe the mentioning of work would be enough for him to decline, and the two of you could go back to goofing off.

"WORK?! YUCK!" Beetlejuice shouts, you smile, there's the ghost you know and love more than you're willing to admit.

"Maybe the breather is right. Maybe the job would be too much for this tender foot to handle," casualty loudly proclaims as he and his sidekick walk away

"TENDER FOOT!?"

Great, now they had him. Beetlejuice was always a sucker for reverse psychology.

"Can a tender foot do this?" Beetlejuice proceeds to 'show off' his so-called slime shooting skills, loudly proclaiming he could shoot his hat before it touched the ground.

The hat went up into the air and beetlejuice went trigger happy, the ghost hit everything BUT the hat, you were smart enough to take cover, the ghost proved in a matter of seconds slime shooting was something he had to cross out on his resume, as he proceeded to cover the towns folk in slime.

But yet the mayor was still eager to hire him.

"Beetlejuice, come on, seriously? you're the worst guy for the job, you lie, cheat, steal, hell you're wanted in 5 different states, and 6 provinces, plus we just got here, why would anyone want you to be sheriff? There's obviously a catch, think about it, " you pleaded with him, your words fell of deaf ears, beetlejuice was too excited with all the glory that came with his new title.

"Beetlejuice, I wouldn't do this if I were you -" You try again only to be shoved aside by the mayor, who was more than ready to slap that star shaped badge on Beetlejuice's chest.

"Congratulations, son, you're exactly what we're looking for!"

"This is a joke, right?" You groaned with arm crossed annoyed over the whole situation.

The mayor dragged Beetlejuice to the group of townsfolk who gathered in the street to see what all the commotion was about.

"Attention, yall, I'd like ya to meet our new sheriff"

The crowd cheered, and Beetlejuice drank in all the attention and praise being showered upon him, while you just stood there trying to put two and two together.

"Oh, I forgot to mention, bully the crud will be here at high noon," the mayor starts

"And he's gonna do terrible, horrible things to you -" Fester continues

"Great," you grumble, there it was, so much for a fun time.

A bell gong rings through the town, and in a matter of seconds the towns folk were gone, leaving only you and Beetlejuice standing in the middle of the street, you pull your phone out of your pocket, though you had no service, it still worked like a clock, time in the netherworld worked differently, though it was evening when you left, it was day time when you arrived, your phone always acted accordingly, it was weird, and you didnt understand it, but you werent complaining.

"Noon," you say in a whisper, your stomach now turning with dread. What the hell did beetlejuice just sign up for?

The ground rumbles, you grab the ghoul's arm out of nervousness, and in a sandstorm cloud of dust a pig pulled carriage charges into tombstone, making a hasty hault in front of the two of you. The door swings open, and there stands what you can only assume is bully the crud, a big bull of a man, snarling and staring down the two of you.

"I'm looking for trouble," he growls

Beetlejuice snorts "never met 'em, you know anyone by that name babes?" The ghoul gives you a nudge. You shake your head

"That ain't what I ment, that was a figure of speech! Which one of the two of you are the sheriff?!"

You clamp your mouth shut, you werent gonna rat out your friend or take the blame. Beetlejuice did the same.

Bully huffs through his nose before grabbing you by your neckerchief

"You better spill -" in the rough movement of grabbing you, your hat got knocked off, your eyes no longer hidden in shadow.

"You better, better- why, arent you a pretty little thing" bully sets you down, and hands you your hat "why you ring my bell little meadow muffin, hows 'bout you give ol'bully a kiss" you cringe at his change in mood and utter out a "what?" More confused than anything else, not to mention disgusted.

Beetlejuice quickly pulls you away, a tad angry over how this overgrown hamburger was now hitting on you, HIS best friend.

"I'm the sheriff round these parts, and this here is my deputy." The ghoul snatches your hat from your hands and roughly puts it back on your head.

"I never agreed to that," you grumble, adjusting your hat.

"YOU'RE THE NEW SHERIFF?!" the bull bellowed, followed by a fit of laughter

"And who might you be?" Beetlejuice puffed out his chest, squaring up to the monster

"I'm bully the crud, the meanest ombre that ever licked a law man," he shouted

"Ya know you look a lot bigger than your eight by tens. Were you sick on picture day?" Beetlejuice laughs, pulling a photo from his pocket

"Enough small talk, I came to run you outta town, and that's what I aim ta do." The bully snorts

"Alright, bully, make your move," beetlejuice snorts reaching for his slime shooter

In a matter of second, the monster grabs beetlejuice with one hand, tightly wrapped about his gut, squeezing the afterlife out of him

"Nice move" beetlejuice croaks

"Wait!" You shout, dead or not, that's got to hurt

Bully drops Beetlejuice, his attention now on you

"Sweet little meadow muffin, ya change your tune about giving ol' bully that kiss?" He coos, quickly making his way in front of you and grabbing your hands. His voice was much less harsh when addressing you. It was nauseating.

"Ugh," you flinch. You'd prefer the same hostility he's shown towards beetlejuice over this 'sweet' side in a heartbeat.

As disgusted as you were, this little exchange, it was enough of a distraction to get beetlejuice back on his feet.

In a flash your ghost host with the most pulls you away from the Bull's grasp

"Back off bovine breath," he snorts, jabbing bully in his chest. "I hope you dont mind me asking, but what's your BEEF with this town anyway? Cuz we'd kinda like ya to just MOO-ve along" with each cow related joke beetlejuice pushed bully back away from you, you bit your tongue, trying not to laugh, despite Beetlejuice's confidence, you werent too sure how dangerous this guy really was, and besides, beej was doing enough laughing for the both of you.

You remained silent watching beetlejuice roll on the floor laughing at his own jokes, that is until Bully has had enough of the ghoul's shenanigans and snaps and screams.

"NOBODY MAKES A LAUGHING STOCK OUT OF BULLY THE CRUD!"

Beetlejuice hops back to his feet and laughs

"Beej, I think you should get serious here," you urge. Yes, you know beetlejuice was a powerful ghost, but he was also a dumbass.

He snorts, "Come on, babes, you worry too much. This over sized hamburger is all bark and no bite, ya know what I mean?" Beetlejuice gives you a half-hearted shrug, turning away from Bully.

Of course, Beetlejuice wasn't as freaked out as you were, he wasnt the one getting kissy faces from a cow.

"Relax, babes, remember what I told ya earlier? Nobody messes with the pest of the west-!?" Beetlejuice freezes. While he spent his time ignoring bully and flapping his gums at you, the bull took his opportunity and painted a large yellow stripe on Beetlejuice's back.

"THE SHERIFF GOT A YELLOW STREAK DOWN HIS BACK!" A voice screams

were the towns folk watching this whole mess?

"You calling me a chicken?!" Beetlejuice screams back

"Boo" bully leans into him and whispers in Beetlejuice's ear

And that was all it took to turn your friend into a giant yellow chicken

Beetlejuice scrambled and clucked away from bully, hopping on the nearest horse and riding out of town.

"Fuck" was all you could say watching your friend ride out of view, you were now screwed.

You were pulled from the spot and hoisted up into bully's arms

"Now that I ran sheriff stinko out of town, let's have us a wedding♡"

"...I just have one question for you"

"Well sure there honey"

"What's the capital on Thailand?"

"What?"

"Its Bangkok!" You shout slamming the heel of your boot into bully's crotch.

Bully drops you and screams. You quickly scramble away, thankful that stupid joke worked.

Your freedom was shortly lived, you didnt get far, no building would let you in, citizens too frightened to what Bully might do to them if they were caught harboring someone he wanted, which was fair in a sense.

Bully pulls you back into his arms and laughs. "You should be more careful there, my little meadow muffin, you dont wanna damage the family jewels, we're gonna need em"

Beetlejuice wherever you are please come back.

...

As you were being prepared/forced to marry a literal monster, Beetlejuice was in the middle of the desert not too worried about you, back to his old abnormal self, arguing with a horse.

"So your not gonna head back to tombstone? What about your friend?"

"Y/n? They're fine, they're the toughest living thing I've ever had the privilege to scare" he waves his horse off, despite all the teasing the ghoul gave you he held a very high opinion of you and just assumes you could take on bully no problem. "They could take on a whole herd of Bully the cruds, no sweat"

...

"Y/n's sure taking their sweet time, I'm beginning to worry" Beetlejuice sighs

"I told ya, bully the crud is one tough side of beef. Do you have any idea what's gonna happen to your little friend if you dont run him outta town?" The horse nags.

Beetlejuice snorts, "Yeah, like I can see the future -" in a flash, Beetlejuice's cowboy attire was replaced with to resemble swami, with a big crystal ball nestled in his lap.

The ghoul snorts out a laugh

"Now let's see if I can get a clear picture on this thing" beetlejuice focuses on the orb and what he sees makes his stomach turn, not only did you fail on rescuing yourself from his mess, you were forced into marriage with that monster, your living status was now gone, you were barefoot and pregnant in a kitchen, and all because of him.

"Y/N! SAY IT AIN'T SO! Y/N AND BULLY ARE GONNA GET HITCHED!"

...

So here you were, hand cuffed, now gagged, in the ugliest puffy dress you ever seen, standing before a minister with you future husband who had a vice grip on you and no way out, you were trapped, you couldnt run, you could barely speak, every objection from your mouth was quickly muffled by Bullys sweaty hands to the point the bull gagged you to make things easier for this mess of a ceremony, if you could manage a few words you would have said the B word 3 times before this got this far. Your time was running out, and your hopes of beetlejuice coming to save you were getting slimmer by the second.

"We are gathered here today to join these two in matrimony, be there any man, or beast" the father gesturing to the side of the church filled with what you could only assume is  Bullys extended family. "Who feels that this here wedding should not take place, let them hold up their hand, or hove, or forever hold their cud," the minister laughs nervously

This was it. You were doomed, there was nothing you could do, you stood there staring forward, utterly lost in despair.

"GET ON WITH IT!" Bully bellows tugging you in closer. This had to be a nightmare, right? Any second your alarm would go off, right? Waking you from this disaster, right?

"That's it! The only thing left to say is, I now pronounce you cow and-!"

"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE PARSON! I OBJECT!"

You whip your head around, knowing that voice anywhere, there he was, your knight in stinking armor, standing at the entrance of the hall, rushing towards you.

"This lil' thing is spoken for" beej spats before pulling you away from Bully, with a snap of the ghoul's fingers your restraints vanish, with your new found freedom you were quick to embrace him, silently thanking the stars he came back in the nic of time.

"How dare you try and marry MY fiance!"

"Your what?" You mumble

"Your fiance?! They ain't got a ring to prove that!"

"Oh?~" Beetlejuice grabs your wrist and shoves your hand in Bully's face, "then what's this?" Placed upon your middle finger was a very large, very tacky, bright green jewel on a black and white striped band, a ring that sure wasn't there 2 minutes ago.

"I-?!" The bully stutters

"You didn't notice? were you too busy forcing my little cockroach into this mess you couldnt be asked to see if they've been already spoken for, I bet you wouldnt listen to a word they said" each word the ghoul spoke he would jab the bull in the chest, he was really laying on the country twang, you couldnt help bit crack a smile knowing the danger of you being married to that monster was gone, not to mention Beetlejuice saying you were his fiance, it was cute and it made your heart skip a beat.

This mirth was short-lived, though, as Bully had had enough of Beetlejuice's shenanigans, with a snarl and a bellowing howl.

"NOBODY CUTS OFF MY NUPTIALS  AND GETS AWAY WITH! IT'S TIME WE SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL!"

"Yeah"

"AND THAT MEANS ONLY ONE THING"

"Name it"

"SLIMESHOOTERS AT 60 PACES"

"YOU GOT IT!"

Bully stomps out of the church to get ready for the dual

Beetlejuice quickly pulls you aside

"Alright babes, let's get out of here, just say those magic b words, and we can amscray," he whispers to you.

"We can't"

"right- WHAT?! WHY?! - I mean, why? Cat got your tongue? Suddenly, you lost your voice? Or, oh no, dont tell me ya changed your mind and ACTUALLY WANT TO MARRY THAT CHUMP??" The ghoul grabs you shoulders and shakes you as if to knock some sense into you.

You brush his hands away "no, Beetlejuice, we cant leave, if we leave Bully is gonna destroy this town and everyone in it, I can't live with that on my shoulders" despite the fact that you hung around with a professional con man, you yourself were honest and kind, and to be the cause of such misery, you could never forgive yourself.

"Like I'm gonna lose sleep over that-" he grumbles

"Please beetlejuice, I'm asking you as a friend, and after you ditching me, I think you owe me" you gesture to the awful dress you were forced in, not to mention how if he was seconds late you could have been hitched to a literal monster.

"Fine" he grumbles

"Besides you're dead, what do you have to lose?"

Beetlejuice groans

"Also, can I ask one more thing of you, Beej? Can you get me out of this dress?" You tug at the tooling. You could barely move, and the fabric was quite itchy.

"Y/n! In front of so many people, and in a church! Well, if you insist, " the ghoul gingerly reaches for the zipper on your dress before you swat his hand away, clearly embarrassed

"I ment with magic." You sigh, not really in the mood for games

"Right, I knew that, just messing with ya," he chuckles sheepishly. With another snap, you were back in your cowboy attire

"Thank you, now, now what about bully?" You sneer

"Sit tight, babes, Bully's got a date with the sheriff"

"No, we can beat him together." You give the ghoul a light punch in the arm, still a little sore he left you behind.

...

Like any other western movie cliche, beetlejuice and bully square off in the center of town

"Please, for the love of god cheat," you grumble, watching this soon to be mess from the sidelines.

"That would be ideal, your friend there couldn't hit the ground with his hat," the mayor buts in to your mutterings

"But I think I have something dumb enough it might just work -" you muse before running off.

"This is it bully. It's time to separate the men from the bulls. There's no tomorrow. It's now or never, the cheese stands alone!"

"Quit stalling and draw!" Bully sneers, absolutely fed up with Beetlejuice's nonsense.

"Draw? I'm a little rusty, but I'll give it a go. " Beetlejuice snorts swapping his cowboy hat for a beret, pulling a canvas and easel out of nowhere

"Now I'm gonna need ya to keep that pose for the next few hours -"

Bully screams in frustration, ripping the canvas away from Beej and slamming it over head

Beetlejuice unfazed snorts. "I really get into my work"

"I'm gonna give you one last chance to draw beetlejerk, or else I'm gonna start without ya, NOW DRAW!"

Beetlejuice swallows the lump in his throat "I guess this is it, theres no turning back now"

"Hold it!"

"Y/n!" Beetlejuice shouts, glad to see you

"Hey Bully I've change my mind about marrying you!" You shout

"WHAT!? Babes have you lost your mind?!"

"You have?! Oh honey I'd knew youd come around♡"

You run into the center of the action and with Bully distracted, you toss beetlejuice a different pistol

"Shoot!" You shout

"OH!" Beetlejuice fumbles with the gun before taking clear aim and firing, but instead of slime, a red sauce came out, covering bully, you let out a sigh you didnt know you were holding, the fact that beetlejuice ACTUALLY hit bully was nothing other than luck.

"Huh?! BARBEQUE SAUCE?! GET IT OFF OF ME" Bully screams

"I dont know about you, babes, but I could eat." beetlejuice growls, scraping a knife and fork together.

Bully scared for his afterlife screams and scrambles out of tombstone, off into the sunset and out of sight.

"Thank god" you sigh, absolutely physically and emotionally exhausted

"We did it, babes!" Beetlejuice pulls you into a side hug

"Yeah" you chuckle

"Sheriff, we can't thank you enough." The mayor shakes Beetlejuice's hand

"Yup, bully the crud won't be bothering this town anymore, so long as you keep plenty of barbeque sauce on hand, but alas, it's about time I hung up the old slimeshooters" beetlejuice sighs

"WHAT?!" The mayor of tombstone drops to the ground and hugs Beetlejuice's knees."NO! dont quit, is it because of me, because I got you to take the job with trickery, dishonesty, and deceit?"

Beetlejuice snorts out a laugh "heck no  I like that in a guy, but no, I'm hanging up my guns for personal reasons, all this mud are ruining my boots"

The mayor sighs, "we lose a lot of them that way..."

"We should get going, Beej." You finally interrupt, desperate to get home and rest.

Beetlejuice perks up. "So babes, how's bout a thank you for your hero, huh?" Beetlejuice  leans into you, wiggling his eyebrows

"A 'thank you' to the guy whose fault I almost married to cow?" You snort out a laugh

"I came back in the nic of time, didn't I? Come on, come on, come on~" the ghoul teases, nudging his elbow into your arm.

You yank beetlejuice by his neckerchief pulling him close to your level, that was enough to get him to shut his mouth, and in an instant, you give him a quick, soft kiss on his cheek.

Letting him go, he remains stunned. You give the ghoul a light punch in the arm

"Come on, beetlejuice, let's go home"

"...Right"

It was odd, everytime you've shown beej kindness or compassion, he would always go off saying it was 'gross' but this time that wasnt that case, he remained silent, which after the day you had, you were fine with that.

Bonus

To be honest, you were exhausted, between a rough work week and that whole emotional nearly married to a monster thing. You nearly passed out when you returned home.

But now all that was behind you and you were home again, safe and unwed.

In the netherworld, the ghoul who dragged you into the situation/ saved you was laying awake in his bed, hand gingerly placed upon the cheek you so quickly kissed.

Yes, beetlejuice has kissed you multiple times, but as a joke, sort of, but this? You kissing him? With genuine feeling?

"Gross" was all he could utter, hand still holding the spot where your lips met his cold face.

[doomzidle]

What is the canon route for DSaF 3?

There's been a lot of confusion on what is the canon route for DSAF 3, and for good reason. Direct Doggo says that no single route is canon, which originally didn't make any sense because the start of DSAF 3 looks like it follows DSAF 2's 'Perfect ending' (The ending where you and Peter rig Dave's suit, and springlock him, effectively turning him into Davetrap.) But, if you follow any 'Dave' route in DSAF 2, Dave never becomes Davetrap, which doesn't make any sense with Doggo's claim, because in the third game you will ALWAYS find Dave as Davetrap.

How ELSE would Dave become Davetrap? Fortunately, we've found the replacement for the perfect ending, and how Dave becomes Davetrap even when you side with Dave There's a DSAF spin-off, not many people know about, called Project: Save the Kiddins. Doggo made it as a fundraiser. It takes place after the events of DSAF 2, and before DSaF 3. It's canon. basically FNAF 1, but with DSAF characters, and you have the ability to wander around the map freely.

(look at the lil guy.) Jack has gone to work the nightshift under a false name, and it seems like he’s doing this to fix what he’s done, hence BJ’s deciphered dialogue. We also know this HAD to of followed a Dave route as well, meaning Jack had killed kids before this.

Dave's tapes.

Here's more evidence this is a former 'Dave route', he's literally alive and NOT springlocked, and just look at the way he's talking to Jack. This also takes place a few years AFTER dsaf 2. The fact Dave's not already davetrap itself tells us it that DSaF 2's 'Perfect ending' ISN'T the canon route the third game follows. (these are 2 of the nightly messages Dave leaves for the nightguard)

``Old sport! It must be you. Nobody else could just lob their ass down and survive four nights like it’s nothing at all. Old sport oh, how I’ve missed you. You came back. You Always come back. Have you come back for me, Old Sport? Have you come back for ol’ Davey? I knew it! I just knew that you really loved me! Look, I have to go, Old Sport, but, I’ll be right back tomorrow night. Okay? Stay alive, old sport. I’ll speak to you tomorrow, Sportsy.``

And the following night, Dave sill say this;

''Old sport! I can’t believe you’ve come back. You have no idea how much I’ve missed you. How much WE’VE missed you. We’re a family, Old Sport. Freddy’s is a family, I thought you had abandoned us, Old Sport. But now it’s clear to me. You can be part of us again! You don’t have no idea how lonely these last few years have been, Old Sport. My life was dead without you, but you were lost and now you are found. I’m coming back for you, Old Sport. I’m going to come back and find you, I’m going to come find you, I’m going to come find you.``

Dave's still kicking, and Jack's trying to makeup for his wrong doings.

Now, if we go to the ending of Project: Save the Kiddins, we see the only other way Dave would've become Davetrap.

The kids trick him into entering the suit, and he dies, right there and then. Bro is DEAD, GONE, DECIMATED. This is also the UTAH location, I believe. The same location you find Davetrap in while salvaging in DSaF three.

This makes Doggo's claim of no single route being canon make sense. Project: Save the Kiddins servers as a replacement for how Dave becomes Davetrap. There's also more evidence in the flipside, you can walk up to any bonnie poster to get the dialogue tree. Jack will say he's seen Bonnie without a face at three locations, Dave will ask 'three? but I only remember seeing you at two locations.'' Jack will reply 'I know, that's because I worked the night shift. You wouldn't of seen me.''

ANYWHO, have this big hunk of lore. I usually have a LOT of lore discussions in several servers, so I'll probably just post stuff I find here, too... because why not?

[impactrueno]

Hi. First of all, I really LOVE your art. Secondly, what do you think a Beetlejuice 3 should look like? If so, what to address? Describe how BJ became so powerful? A return of the Maitlands? A new villain? Adaptation of any character from the animation?

well the maitlands returning is already ruled out, since geena davis and alec baldwin can't return for the roles (well maybe geena could) and i highly doubt tim would replace them. that's why they had to handwave their absence with the loop hole thing.

and the thing about the characters from the cartoon is that they're mostly monsters, and there's no monsters in the movies besides the sandworms (and apparently the grim reaper.) there's only dead people. it's meant to be a little mundane and bureaucratic because it's the human afterlife, so idk if elements from the cartoon neitherworld would fit since they're all so non-human.

sorry i'm sounding like a stick in the mud here LMAO

a new villain could be fun, i'm never gonna complain about having even more characters and lore in the movieverse lol. but delores can still very easily be around, and BJBJ already had to balance three villains...

i think the third one should focus more on lydia because her arc felt very incomplete in BJBJ (that's part of why i'm making my beetleverse comics, i want to give her closure) and i would also like to see beetlejuice and lydia having an actual conversation that goes somewhere with their characters. maybe that's asking too much because i realize that's not really the style of the movies HAHA but i do want to see some character development from both

besides that idk i try not to have too many expectations so i can keep my mind open to whatever the franchise decides to throw at us

[marley-manson]

what evidence do you have that bj and hawkeye are only friends because they are "trapped in an army base" and "hawkeye doesn't have any better options"?

tbf I didn't say they're only friends because they're trapped on an army base, I said BJ only gets away with his late season shit because they're trapped on an army base. That said, I do think if they'd met anywhere else, like at a medical conference, they wouldn't have become friends, and yeah the way they clash in the later seasons, I don't think they'd stay friends if Hawkeye wasn't stuck with him.

My evidence is:

Hawkeye describing BJ as a good clean-cut family man and adding "Despite that, I really like the guy," in Our Finest Hour, indicating that on a surface level they're not that compatible. On a deeper level of incompatibility, you have episodes like Preventative Medicine where they clash on a deep ethical level and don't reconcile their points, they simply choose to drop the argument. You also have their respective attitudes to hardship as highlighted in later seasons - BJ "saves [his] pshaws for things he can do something about," and largely remains passive give or take moments of sudden lashing out (eg the end of Back Pay) when he loses his self control, while Hawkeye is always acting on his feelings as much as possible whether he can affect change or not, because it helps him not feel helpless. BJ derides and mocks this attitude (calling him crazy in Back Pay and Tell it To the Marines, calling his tongue depressor tower pointless in Depressing News, etc) and Hawkeye ignores him and does what he needs to do anyway. They do not help each other see eye to eye or meet in the middle, they simply clash and do their own thing.

More headcanony, but I also think they're incompatible emotionally, in that Hawkeye wants people to open up to him and spill their feelings, and BJ is one of the characters most allergic to doing that, and almost never supports Hawkeye when he wants to talk about his feelings (Blood and Guts, Depressing News, GFA, etc). They have a very uneven relationship where Hawkeye is BJ's emotional support whenever BJ snaps, but BJ ditches Hawkeye when Hawkeye just needs his emotional support (this is what "Would you hold me in your arms or would you let me lie there and bleed?" is about), and I think BJ tries to make up for this with big gestures, but Hawkeye is more about the day to day support and solidarity with each other.

There's also the intensity of the rebound vibe in Welcome to Korea part 1 where Hawkeye refocuses on BJ after moping about Trapper and seems to deliberately explore how compatible they can be as friends - the babysitter comment to suss out whether he'd be a partner in womanizing, his willingness to break rules and flout authority, his sense of humour. BJ passes, so Hawkeye accepts him. It feels calculated because Hawkeye needs a replacement Trapper. ("We need to get him started on his ulcer," as potential evidence of Hawkeye wanting him to be Trapper 2.0)

BJ's attitude throughout season 4, in which he stamps out his own reactions and feelings to align himself with Hawkeye. The Bus has a thread of a battle of wills between Hawkeye and BJ over whether or not to include Frank, which Hawkeye wins. In Hey Doc he also wants Hawkeye to be nicer to Frank, but in the rest of the season he's right there with Hawkeye making fun of him. In The Gun BJ stands respectfully when Margaret comes to their table and Hawkeye glares at him disapprovingly, so then BJ turns it into a joke, seemingly correcting his own behaviour.

Wheelers and Dealers characterizes BJ as resentful in a way that makes him passive aggressive, which rings very true to his character to me. In Wheelers and Dealers he bemoans being so nice and passive and lashes out. "Who cares about what they want, I'm doing what I want for a change." This obviously says that he buries parts of himself to make nice with people habitually, as part of how he interacts with people, and I think you can see him doing it with Hawkeye early on.

You also have episodes like Heroes and Stars and Stripes where BJ alternately mocks Hawkeye for getting the spotlight and lords his own spotlight over Hawkeye, because he's insecure and presumably feels overshadowed by Hawkeye.

This is all to support my take that BJ moulds himself to suit Hawkeye because they're not intrinsically all that compatible as people, and he resents being the one to do that. So later BJ lashing out with mean pranks and psychological warfare (Bottoms Up, Dear Uncle Abdul, Joker Is Wild, what feels to me like negging in No Laughing Matter, etc) and ditching/mocking Hawkeye when he's upset about something (Back Pay, Depressing News, Give Em Hell Hawkeye, Blood and Guts, etc) is a response to that resentment when he feels more secure in Hawkeye putting up with it.

I think BJ would probably mould himself to fit anyone he wants to be friends with, but I don't think if given the option, he'd choose to be friends with Hawkeye. He disapproves of several things about Hawkeye even initially - his aforementioned lack of patience with Frank, his rampant sexuality (eg he does disapprove of Hawkeye sleeping with Carlye in The More I See You, and you also have several instances of BJ making fun of Hawkeye when it comes to his attitude towards sex, eg Taking the Fifth, Inga). And I don't think Hawkeye would choose to be friends with a monogamous married suburbanite if they weren't forced together right after Hawkeye lost his last war zone bff.

My evidence for Hawkeye only putting up with BJ's late season attitude because he's trapped is that he tries to put his foot down multiple times and fails because a) the 4077 is a very small world, and b) BJ needs his emotional support in a war zone. And every time he comes back they don't address what they fought over or discuss it or reconcile it, they simply drop it because they're reliant on their friendship.

In Ain't Love Grand he sleeps in the front office but comes back to share good news with BJ and emotionally support him. In The Most Unforgettable Characters they drop the fight because it upsets Radar without addressing why they were fighting. In Picture This Margaret manipulates Hawkeye into going back to BJ by lying about BJ needing his support. In The Joker is Wild and Bottoms Up Hawkeye mildly pranks BJ back in a tag and calls them even even though he's taking a loss.

It's also worth noting that Hawkeye hates BJ's friend Leo's extremely weaponized style of pranking. He's fine with shit like exploding cigars, not fine with him getting BJ court martialed. BJ is fine with it and thinks it's funny, which strikes me as another unaddressed incompatibility that feeds into the vibe of BJ's pretty intense psychological warfare later on, which Hawkeye is generally upset by rather than seeing it as all good fun.

And in GFA they both initially intend to leave without seeing each other again, BJ trying to leave a week early despite knowing his travel orders are sus and without saying goodbye or leaving a note, and Hawkeye expecting and ecstatic to be flown home when released from the hospital only to be ordered back to the 4077 for one more week. Also in GFA Hawkeye says goodbye for good, fully expecting to never see BJ again and sad about it but accepting.

Oh also the fact that Welcome to Korea is structured as a series of horrible things happening in a war zone that bond them together through shared trauma is another piece of strong evidence for the reading that being in a warzone together and needing each others' support is why they become friends, when otherwise they might not look twice at each other.

Ultimately you can take all this stuff and also interpret it as two guys who fall in genuine love/intense friendship and put up with each other because of that, but I think there's more than enough evidence that them being trapped together in hell is a major reason they become and stay friends, and imo it's a solid reading of their relationship, and also infinitely more interesting to me.

[c0llisiion]

could you do a junwon (ex fantasy boys) full smut where he basically ties the reader up, spanks her, and really really degrades her? Idk if you are a dark content writer, but if you are, could you make him like toxic and manipulative? If not, then don’t include that part. Also, could I please be 🛍 anon? Thanksss!!!<<<3333

EYE CANDY - y.jw

★pairing: yun junwon + fem!reader

★genre : smut

★: meandom!jw , sub!reader , spanking, restrictions , clit slapping, squirting, cervix fucking , toxicex!jw , name calling, he is kinda mean to reader , bj , raw sex (practice protected sex!) spit kink , mention of d34th(once) — lmk if i missed any! ^^

★W/C: 1,815

A/N: AHHHH WTFFF I NEVER THOUGHT I WILL BE WRITING FOR MY WONNIE MY POOKIE WOOKIE IMH 😭😭😭☝️☝️☝️ THIS WAS SO EXCITING HOPE YOU LIKED IT ANON! i tried my best plssss 💀💔

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ MDNI. Please refrain from reading if the topics make you uncomfortable. ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Toxic ex-boyfriend junwon who refused to give you a break. His constant cheating and douchebag personality were the only reasons you broke up with him. You lost count of the number of times he cheated on you or blamed you for things you never did. Oh, you talked to one of your guy friends? He would accuse you of cheating on him. Fake tears stream down his face as he keeps blabbing about how you broke his trust and how much of a slut you are for speaking to other men. But when it was the vice versa? He would once again blame you. He would continue to express his hatred towards you and how it was YOUR fault that he had to resort to cheating because you were unable to provide him with what he desired. and every time things would end between you both, it was either him on his knees crying and hollering for you to take him back or your face smushed onto his pillow while he fucked into you mercilessly.

This time, it was unlike any other. He had you bent over his lap. His leather belt tied your hands behind your back while he assaulted your ass. “Tell me, sweetheart.” He would put on a fake sweet tone, his slender fingers rubbing circles into your glistening cunt as his other hand smoothed over your red cheeks. “How is it like to be an attention-seeking bitch?” He spat. His harsh words and the way he teased your hole made you whine. The area became more red after a loud slap hit your ass. “Words. Use your fucking words.” He said, pulling your hair back so he could make eye contact with you. Your eyes were puffy and red from the constant teasing and pain. He liked seeing you in this state. All vulnerable and in the mercy of his hands. “I-i didn’t do anything jun… i was j-just-“ you moaned out loud as another slap landed on your ass. “Wrong. I saw the way you looked at them. I noticed everything. The way you touched his arm. How could you do that? How dare you? Why don’t you learn, y/n?!” He said it in a disappointed tone. "I bet you wanted him to fuck you. Thats right, the only thing you are worth for is sucking on dicks.” You shook your head every time nonsense words came out of his mouth. “I-i would never …!” He slapped your sopping cunt. You winced at the pain. It was overwhelming. “Lies.” He bluntly told you as his hand rubbed over your red ass cheeks before spanking you again, this time harder. You jerked off his body at impact. “Always lying.” You shake your head before speaking up. “Im only fit for you… junwon.” you managed to mumble out. You felt his eyes stare into your soul as you mumbled those words. His fingers started prodding into your needy hole. Your toes curled as your insides finally got their desired stimulation. “Say that again will ya?” He said as pushing his three fingers into you. You moaned softly before it was replaced by a loud cry as he spanked you once again. “Speak tf up!” He said basically screaming into your ears. “YES! Yes! God- im only f-fit for you junwon! You! I want your cock in me so bad. I want you to fuck me till I can’t think straight anymore!” You babbled. He chuckled darkly at your response. “Good girl…” he says. You sigh and try to relax a bit when you feel a sudden shift. You were now on your knees; his cock, now free, was right in your face, and your nose and lips were touching it. He held it in one hand while the other was holding your head tightly. He rubbed his cock on your face. Smearing his pre all over. He groaned at the sight. You stayed silent, not having the liberty to do anything in your current state. He brought his tip to your lips before pushing in harshly. You groaned out loud as your throat choked around his hard length. Your eyes filled with tears as you stared up at him. He stared, bobbing your head up and down his dick. Pushing deeper and deeper till his tip hit the back of your throat. Your constant gagging and choking were turning him on. He loved watching your spit collect around his base and spread around your mouth. 

He pulled back, finally letting you breathe. He brought your face closer to his crotch, his cock hitting your cheeks. He smiled down at you, smoothing over your sweaty forehead. Your eyes were unfocused and tired. “Tired?” He asks in his fake tone again. You nod, your eyebrows scrunching up in discomfort.  “Too bad.” That was all he said before shoving his cock down your throat again, but this time with greater force. He kept bucking his hips, hitting the back of your throat each time. His head was thrown back as he basked in the moment. He let go of your hair, giving you the chance to work on his dick by yourself. You knew exactly how to please him. Your head bobbed around his length faster. Gagging each time. You pulled away with a gasp, your face already a sticky mess, before spitting on his tip and sucking on it. Junwon was in awe as he watched. “Look at you.. doing so good? I was so right.. like always. You really are only fit for this. So pretty. So so pretty. Im so glad that I am the only one who gets to have you as my cockslut.” He moaned out. Your mouth continued working on him. His chest was heaving, and his breath was getting shorter. His eyes were squeezed shut, which indicated he was close. “F-fuck.. fuck just like that, keep going…” your tongue circled around his girth, giving his tip special attention. Within seconds, junwon was cumming in your mouth. He pushed your head down more and more until your nose hit his pelvis. You felt hot cum spill into your throat over and over again, swallowing shamelessly. Your eyes swelled with tears as he pulled you off his dick. He pushed two fingers into your mouth, prompting you to open wide. His thumb rested on your tongue as he observed your mouth. A smug smile was plastered on his face. Junwon slapped your face before taking your jaws in his hands. “You swallowed without me even asking?… i fucking love you.” He says, and you couldn’t help but smile to yourself. His hands wrap around your neck as he pulls you into a rough kiss. He lifted you up from your knees, pushing you down to the couch. Your legs were instinctively spread wide open, waiting for him to bury his cock into you already.

He looked down at you. Your pussy glistening under the soft lights that decorated your once-shared apartment. He looked back up at you. A stupid smirk was on his face as he rubbed his tip up and down your folds. “Look at you all wet and needy…you want me to fuck you silly? Huh? You want me to ram you into this couch? Yeah? That's the only thing you are good for..” he said. “..Taking my cock in like a good fucking whore.” His hands around your neck as he pushes his girth into your sopping cunt slowly. Loud squelches were heard as you tried taking him in. “Good lord.. do you hear that..? Do you hear your pussy? So fucking wet, your pussy is literally dripping…” he groans as he continues pushing, watching you suck him in. “Fuck– you are such a filthy whore… making a mess already,,,” your juices were dripping down from your hole to the white couch, creating a small wet mess on the furniture. You arched your back off of the couch as his girth hit your cervix. He hissed as your pussy clenched around him, and without any hesitation, he started ramming into you. Your mouth flung open, and your eyes went wide as his thick cock abused your soft walls. Choked-out moans and gasps escaped your mouth. Junwon was staring down at the bulge that had formed in your lower belly. He smirked before tightening his grip on you, fucking into your cervix. Your eyes rolled back, and tears started spilling.

He was getting turned on more and more as you continued crying. His other hand gave your clit a small slap, causing you to jerk and wince at the pain. His hot spit landed on your throbbing bud, using it as a lubricant to flick your clit. Your legs were twitching as he continued to squeeze and tug on your bud. “Junwon! Gentle…! Please…” you whined out. He slapped your tit in response. “Shut the fuck up. You dont get to say anything after all you did. You wanna be a cock-hungry slut? I will make you one.” You shook her head before you felt a gush of white spill out of you. Junwon groaned as he felt your arousal coat his dick and drip down. He started fucking into you harder, determined to pull out at least three more orgasms out of you. “Thats right.. cum for me.. so good..” You were moaning mess as he kept pounding into you. “J-jun.. fuck! Too much.. k-keep.. going!” Junwon smirked as you babbled those words. “yeah? You like my cock buried inside your sweet little pussy don't you sweetheart? Gosh your pussy is sucking me in so good .. What did ya say earlier? You hated me? You wanted me dead?” He chuckled darkly. “Your cunt says otherwise.” A stupid smirk plastered on his face. You felt yourself getting closer to your high.

Junwon noticed how your head was thrown back, your eyes shut, and your breath was faltering. He knew you were close. He increased his speed. Sounds of wet skin slapped echoed through the walls. You gasped out loud when you felt yourself come undone. Squirting all over his abdomen. Junwon kept rutting into you as he helped you ride your orgasm. “Oh god…” he moaned as clear liquid kept gushing out of you. His thrusts got sloppier as he kept pounding into you. Your pussy was spasming around him, your arousal was still flowing out. 

“F-fuck!..” he let out a loud moan as his seeds filled you up. You were unconsciously clenching around him, milking him. His bit down his lips and his eyes were squeezed shut as he slowly pulled out of you, his cum leaking out of you. He sat back on the coffee table with heavy breaths as he stared at your splayed-out body, covered in sweat, bruises from his grasp, and his milky white cum dripping out of your abused hole with a smug smirk.

A/N: thank you for readingggg <3 yoongi fic might drop soon so 😋💅

[shitpostingkats]

What are your Twewy reaper headcanons?

NORMAL, I HAVE A NORMAL AMOUNT OF REAPER HEADCANONS THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING

Okay so if you count Def March (which I absolutely do) there's twelve named Shibuya reapers. Which fits with the fact that every reaper corresponds to an animal of the chinese zodiac.

I'm just guessing with BJ and Tenho, according to Nomura every reaper has a hidden kanji in their names representing their animal, but I can't read japanese so I took a shot in the dark. Also, fun fact, Minamimoto can't rearrange the radicals in his name to spell boar, like he can with lion, his true noise form. But he's got a lot of boar symbolism, being found in Pork City, and his Leo Cantus Armo form having tusks, which ties into the fact that the Shinjuku reapers all have motifs based on hanafuda suits. MORE ON THAT LATER I AM VERY NORMAL ABOUT HIM.

Ahem. So awhile back I was considering writing a fic on all the Shibuya reapers and how they came to have their current jobs, what their games were like, etc. (Might still write this. I've been busy)

So I sat down to try and come up with headcanons for EVERY named Shibuya reaper, and now I hold every one of them near and dear to my heart.

Kariya is mentioned in game as the oldest reaper, probably having been around for longer than anyone else. I like to imagine there's a huge gap between him and any other current reaper, which drives Mitsuki CRAZY, this chill dude just hangs around and eats candy but also has seniority???? Also he's more powerful than any other reaper save maybe the composer?

The thing that did him in was lung cancer. The lollipop's a replacement cigarette, in much the same way people recommend chewing on hard candy if you're trying to quite smoking. Why did he decide to quit after he died, and he no longer had anything to worry about? Listen the Game's all about growth, and Kariya is possibly the strongest because he is so capable of change, of going with the flow, and learning from his mistakes.

Like every ex-Player, he had a partner when he won his game, and I don't have a whole lot of headcanons for them except 1) they chose to return to life, and 2) Uzuki reminds him of them a lot.

Mitsuki was a woman working her ass off to try and make it in male-led office, until she literally worked herself to death. As you might expect, this royally pissed her off. She was desperate to return to life, but unfortunately, her entry fee came as a pair. What her partner, a simple farmwoman from out of town, valued most was the ability to go unnoticed and unremarked on, while Mitsuki deeply coveted every scrap and morsel of recognition she could get.

So their partnership was cursed so no matter what they did, people's eyes would skate over Mitsuki, dismiss her, and Mitsuki's partner would be lauded with the credit. Mitsuki became almost invisible, while her partner was forced to step up and do most of the talking.

This led her partner feeling more comfortable with being seen, with taking up space, so when the chance came to return to life, she took it with grace. Mitsuki, on the other hand, came to realize she liked working from the shadows. And besides, she could have more power as a reaper than anything a stupid company of the living could offer her...

Higashizawa is pretty simple, both in the game and in my headcanons. He's a cook. Maybe an army cook, but the point is he values food as a part of life, and had to cope with entry fee in the game being unable to eat, despite all the other players, including his partner, being able to.

I picture his partner on the younger side, maybe a cadet, maybe not. They had a very sweet dynamic, very paternal. Even though he couldn't eat, Higashizawa would break into restaurants that didn't have a reaper decal, and "commandeer" their kitchens to make dishes, which, despite only one of them eating them, saved them enough yen and gave enough stat boosts for them to win the game. And led to a spiked increase in reports in "haunted kitchens" for the week they were playing.

Kitanji is TRANS. I know this for a fact. Mr. Square Enix himself told me.

"Megumi" is technically a unisex name but much more commonly a feminine one, something that is actually brought up in the manga, when my dumb cat son tries to nickname Kitanji and Kitanji snaps back that he's very sensitive about his name and was bullied as a kid. This is a trans guy.

He ran a record store in life that unfortunately fell victim to an armed robbery, and Kitanji was killed. His most important thing, his name, was taken from him as his entry fee. This further parallels him to Neku, who woke up in the game knowing nothing but his name. It could also explain why he's so distrusting of Shibuya and thinks the world would simply be better if everyone conformed; after being on the end of transphobic bullying in life, the idea of standing out and embracing the chaos of being a unique soul terrifies him.

MINAMIMOTO is my dumb stupid goth catboy son and I am INSUFFERABLE about him. I have SO many headcanons it's insane.

First off, he died of general exposure, as he was homeless for most of his life. This nicely ties into his habit of collecting garbage, making trash into something brash and artistic, and his general attitude of making himself heard and assertive, while still being so in tune with the flow of the city and people that he has powers unseen in any other reaper. Minamimoto was ignored by the city in life so in death HE IS GOING TO KILL GOD AND TAKE HIS PLACE. WHILE BEING EXTREMELY LOUD ABOUT IT.

So it stands to reason that his entry fee, upon entering the game, was his voice. For the entire game, he was completely mute.

(One of the first things he did as a reaper, was get his megaphone.)

His partner was a diver from the coast who's entry fee was her memories of her home. She knew she had one, she just couldn't remember where, and who was waiting for her in the living world. They developed a series of hand signs for Sho to communicate with, both having a rough grasp of JSL, Sho from some fellow homeless people who were deaf and her from her experience as a diver.

My other big, big headcanon for him is, about 3/4s of the way through the week, she died. Sho, knowing about the seven minutes rule because he picks things up quickly, knew he didn't have long to live if he let her soul energy dissipate and that she would never find out where he home was, but it was MOSTLY about his own survival, shut up, collected up her soul data and tried balancing her equation and a bunch of other Minamimoto nonsense I am not smart enough to write. x = acos(t) and y = asin(t) over root 2 and all that.

He turned her into a noise.

After all, transformation is kinda his thing, and he's notably skilled at manipulating Soul and giving it new forms. He was the one who discovered the loophole that Beat would use to save his sister in week 1. It's what originally put him on Hanekoma's radar as someone to keep an eye on. Hanekoma also made note of the process in case he ever needed it.

After that, Minamimoto went on to win the game, have his partner restored to life, and was now far too curious about studying Soul and Noise to even think of doing anything else but staying in the UG.

His noise form, while originally a boar, he managed to by complete force of will shape into a lion, just because he wanted to be a lion.

He had a short tenure as a wall reaper, where he would ask impossibly long math questions of the "A train leaves Philadelphia at 8:00am traveling 90 mph" variety. This caused him to be promoted to an Officer just to stop him from being a Harrier, and some rules to be laid down regarding what can and can't be a viable quiz for the wall questions.

Def March was a real band before they died, probably in some hilarious way, that killed all three of them. Being Shibuya's only instance of a rare three person pact, their collective entry fee was their memories of knowing each other in life, but they decided to stick together anyways despite having no idea who these random two other guys they woke up in the afterlife with were. Cue clown music as they proceed to become best friends and vow to start a band together once they win the game.

They decided to stay as reapers once they won because none of them could think of anything cooler than a metal band that was actually dead.

Although still very passionate about music, most of their memories of being a band getting erased meant they had some space to explore new hobbies. BJ and Tenho decided to combine their newfound loves of bar trivia and local history into a new method of Harrying, known as the Reaper Review.

Coco wasn't able to see much of the city when she was alive, being hospital bound for most of her life before losing the fight to a chronic illness at a young age. So she took to being a reaper with gusto, diving in to the local trends and culture like she was starving for it. Her entry fee might be considered a paltry thing to most, the ability to see color, but it truly was the thing about herself she valued most. After a life of drab grey walls and sterile surfaces, color was deeply important to her, none moreso than the colors she chose for herself.

She's also the most adventurous of the Shibuya reapers, being the one to actually leave the district and travel to other places in the city, which is how she and Tsugumi became friends.

Uzuki is the second newest reaper, having died recently of a heart attack (see the sprites where she clutches her chest when taken off guard) Like Mitsuki, she was originally deeply annoyed by her life being cut short, but adapted quickly to the new structure of the reapers and is aiming high after realizing how much more being a reaper can offer her. I genuinely have no idea what her entry fee might have been so I am currently in the market for a good headcanon there.

Joshua is the most recent addition to the Shibuya reapers

Okay, hear me out.

First off, I am obsessed with the fanon that Joshua and Fret knew each other in life. Joshua is heavily implied in the first game to have taken his own life, while Fret speaks in the second about losing a friend to what is heavily implied to be suicide. The idea that the loss that set Fret down the path of repression and insincerity was Joshua scratches my brain in such a satisfying way.

Second, he's a prodigy in all things UG related, but has the general attitude and personality of someone actually the age he appears to be. Boy is chronically 15. I think it's much more likely he died a little more than a year or two ago before the start of twewy and rose through the ranks quickly, rather than being some eternally 15 twerp whose been around for years.

It is mentioned he knew Hanekoma in life, and would visit CAT street frequently to talk about the UG, which is something he could see even before he died. He killed himself knowing where he would go, and how he was special.

So I think his entry fee is he got to the UG and couldn't see anything.

No noise, no reapers, no players. Hanekoma was waiting for him, being just enough of a non-game-related entity to at least give him a heads up and see he got a Pact. Joshua himself doesn't know much about his partner, being unable to see them for the entire game. But he did rely on them. Trust your partner. In Josh's case, he had to.

Also, think about the blood vessel Uzuki would pop if she learned that the all powerful composer who wields the power of the entire city with a mysterious anonymity had actually been with the UG shorter than she has.

[sw33tsnow]

Enchanted by the aching wounds

- (III) / (III)

Mercenary!Simon "Ghost" Riley x Harpy!F!Reader (18+)

Warning: NOT FOR MINORS, mentions of blood, mentions of violence, slight angst, fluff, smut, cunnilingus, bj, p in v, unprotected sex, etc. #: I'M TERRIBLY APOLOGIZE FOR ANY GRAMMAR ERRS AND THE DELAY, don't really know why this part is kinda cheesy but please enjoy.

Wordcount: 5k3

THE FIRST PART || THE SECOND PART

Spring

The season when the frigid white snow melts away to make way for new shoots to sprout, when the air is filled with the fresh aroma of flowers in blossom, and when any races require a roof over their heads. It used to be a sacred notion which all kinds looked forward to - a time when couples, regardless of humans, fairies, or animals, were inextricably bound together. Almost forgot, the rain, the exuberant and the prickle when the fresh drops of water blew on your skin and feathers as you tore the winds and parted the clouds upon the vast sky were indescribable.

Perhaps as the same as a lonely, barren tree bark that’s rejuvenated - you felt revived, and it should’ve been like that, it should've been the season you loathed the least.

Spring

All things proliferate, regardless of races.

You've opted to find a persuasive excuse for being absent for a few days after this last job since your estrus period, referred to as heat, has arrived and symptoms have begun to occur. If you're near mankind - species that couldn't satisfy you, you'd certainly cause harm to the gentlemen, whether unconsciously or not. But at the moment, all your attempts have gone down the drain.

Spring

Flabbergasted? The stench? Couldn't truly declare.

Crimson sprayed from your body, staining the meticulous pattern of the tiles on the garden floor. The agony did not reach your brain because your nerves were unable to respond to the abrupt slash, you suddenly lurched back and dropped to your knees, realizing that you had been ambushed because of the unclear shouting that was echoing in your eardrums which came from the other four members. Promptly reversing the gun's barrel then blasting off the foot of the goddamn douchebag in front of your sight, before your own body began to lose awareness, you raised your far-too-bloated arm to shoulder level and flicked your wrist. Your trembling fingers moved in the direction of the men, the white rose fence has been dyed with an alluring but dreadful tint aggressively protruded and crushed the bones of others rivals. 

Successfully drew the men’s attention to their backs, you crawled up and leaned your head against the wall since the icy cold of the rain made you feel nauseous more than ever.

Mother, have mercy

Your darkest dread was going to be revealed, the dirty truth you had fought to keep hidden from the One-Four-One was about to be disclosed, and the thoughts made your dizziness worse.

The blood pool kept flowing and your vision has blurry, leaving you helpless to let your ferae naturae prevailed. 

Spring

Your scales emerged out from under your smooth skin and clung around the mortal wound, as if protecting it, creating dissonant cracking or crumbling noises.

Your horns plus claws grew out, yet the coal black hue of the nails crept down to your fingers, and spikes started to pierce out before stopping when they were almost reached your elbows.

The garment was shredded pathetically as your figure and wings enlarged extraordinarily. Although you seemed unlikely to be any larger than the men, bet that your wings could clamp three like them down without any difficulties.

Your legs, the ravishing legs that Simon always cherished, have been replaced by skinny bird ones with pale skin wrapped around them.

Your far more susceptible than usual body would respond immediately with just a small stimulus, but this cut would definitely leave an unforgettable souvenir.

Witnessing the scene frightened the meater who had just attacked you, he started screaming as dashing off with his paralyzed foot. Your neck snapped in half, causing your head to twist back in a frightful angle and furious pupils poking directly into that pathetic back. In the twinkling of an eye, your levitating silhouette fleeted forward and pounced on the hapless head. Sharp talons dug deep into his skull and wrinkled facial skin before tilting it back, the corners of your lips were stretched close to your ears and your chin was pulled down as your jaw fractured, white fangs jagged in horror on your pink gums and tongue was elongated.

Ultimately, the yelling has stopped when some of your wet stray hairline dangling near the vile man to bite and yank his entire face apart.

Rain....

Thunders rumbled so loud that consciousness seized hold of your mad mind and made you dully dropped the pulseless limbs onto the damp ground.

Landing soundlessly after spitting out the mishmash in your mouth, you looked up to the ether and quivering non-stop as if you were praying to Mother Nature, begging Nak to let you off the hook and wash away your sins, knowing damn well you did not deserve Her precious tears. 

What have you done? Wasn't your craving enough to torture you? Why did everything have to end like this?

“Blimey....” The voice with a distinguished twang echoed.

Burying your teeth into your lips in order to stop the weeping, your disembodied hands wrapped solid around your shoulder blades, and your head shook in denial.

You couldn't turn back, you couldn't tell but also refused to confront the men's glimpse. Please allow you to be prone to vulnerability at this point, permit you to escape this devastating reality. You didn't want to admit but didn't want to suffer from being misunderstood either, but you lacked enough strength to undertake things proper anymore.

The sound of single-bell horns mounted on a steam locomotive and metal scraping across the rails served as an alarm. Glancing up at the mansion's turret clock, you knew this was the last trip, the train that your crew had to catch half an hour prior at a station roughly ten minutes distant by horseback from your current location.

"Damn it......Cap, we must make haste" The youngest dashed to grab the leather bag and urged the Captain.

It's already too late and topography was somewhat off your favorable side - no seashore nearby to afford a ship nor could you find any automobiles. The One-Four-One was still human, obviously their legs were not as resilient as Centaurs' and their biological physicals did not possess the gills that Sirens had to breathe underwater.

The only choice for you all was the arranged carriage on the train, and you had no intention of allowing it to stray away like that after faltering your squad.

Wiping away your tears, you stood up and shook your sodden wings. With a flap, you quickly headed towards the gentlemen and grabbed them by each foot, palms capturing the collars of the other two, avoiding the sharp claws from injuring the back of their necks. The suddenness caused Kyle and Soap to hug your hindlimbs tightly, terrified to open their eyes. Adjusting your fingers so as not to make Simon and Price breathless, you silently spread your wings and sped away, attempting not to make any excessive noises.

Finding a safe spot to land proved to be impossible, so you gently dropped the men onto the roof of the numbered train car and took off without sparring a word.

"Come back!" The blond's gruff voice barked out and he took a couple more strides forward as you remained silent, disappearing into the night.

"Ghost, we need to make our way inside…." The Captain placed his hand on the taller man's shoulder, causing his furious gaze to move downward, "….at once".

Soaked attires along with different size boots were dripping on the clean floor, the men entered their carriage right before the brass hat showed up to check their tickets. 

“This’s absurd, why did little lass not comin’ with us?” Soap’s voice cut across the carriage when they were left alone, “She’s plannin' to leave, 's she not?”  

“I believed tha’ remain to be seen” Kyle bluntly answered the eerie question. 

Price indicated them to be quiet with a finger to his lips before the talk devolved into a verbal dispute. The pensive silence made the room appear stuffy. Of course, they've noticed your abnormal behavior recently, but did not expect the outcome to be so hostile.

Your feathers shed more, you're easily startled by the slightest movement, and you started to avoid becoming acquainted with all four of them after a certain amount of time. The sleeves that you usually rolled up have been pushed down, displaying only your fingertips, although they're difficult to detect unless you're having meals together. 

Abruptly all eyes were drawn to the blond. Simon would undoubtedly have a better insight of the situation. However, this was not the ideal timing.

As Simon shut his lids and recalled the arrival of early spring, pangs of apprehension and remorse erupted inside him. You became reluctant to be near him, let alone shower together or sleep in the same bed. You refused looking him in the eyes whenever you both were in a conversation, but still, you reassured him that everything was fine.

For somebody's sake, the man wanted to punch himself so hard for not mucking in with the troubles you seemed to be undergoing. You were always there regardless of whether he had nightmares, always there if the crew needed encouragement or a soothing embrace, and always there when they sought assistance in tackling any issues. Yet when you struggled in anguish, they couldn't do anything but watch dumbfounded. 

The men had never seen this side of you before, so they were taken aback. When you brutally beheaded the footman and still managed to move gracefully while holding four adults, they wondered why the fairies agreed to secrete and allow mortals to exercise authority over their beautiful lands in the past.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_

You were the crystallization of a magnificent match between a Harpy and a Faun, which explained why you've got an exquisite gift and horns that the Aborigines didn't have.

Reasons?

When only a few dispersed varieties persisted, maintenance and survival became more essential than preserving the purity of each species after countless lives were sacrificed in that grueling purge. 

Over decades, more and more bloodlines combined, and flaws began to arise. With the law preventing cross-breeding, pristine matters similar to you fairies originated for a broad spectrum of purposes. If defiled, infants would bear the pitiful results when they're born and the frightening appearance which you owned was in fact an unanticipated consequence.

To make circumstances even more severe, you were forced to endure the mating seasons exhaustively and emotionally unstable since you grew up solitary, violently in the world that was not meant for kind races such as you.

Weeks in the sun cycles and centuries among thousands of moon orbits, ended up being captured to humor the wealthy mankind 'folks' - you've found a new home, one in which you sense shielded when you return, with no tendrils and tattered pieces of sack put together haphazardly. You meet the One-Four-One and the gentlemen treated you as if you were the family's smallest daughter, you've learned that humanity was not all obnoxious. And you were taught how to love.

The man you fell for was rugged but pretty with milky scars and handsome blond hair, he's affectionate though spiteful somehow. Perhaps most importantly, he has a special place particularly for you, only you. 

It made you thrilled by the fact that you both took time confiding in each other. No matter how hesitant you were, you expected to dedicate yourself to Simon this season, claiming his endearment and expressing your sentiments. Remarkably, you've put an end to everything. 

_-_-_-_-_-_-_

The moonlight was immensely bright so the dismal hallway was still illuminated without oil lamps, making it even simpler to conceal his massive figure. Simon loomed at the half-closed door to your chamber, it's been over a week since you left and the man hasn't slept at all. In other words, he refused to sleep, cautious of the magnitude of what might turn out without you by his side. 

The thoughts made his knuckles white from grasping the hilt of the knife. Sliding his other arm to the doorknob, he peaked inside to find all of your drawers laying on the floor, no sign of you. When the sounds of gingerly footsteps and the bizarre whistling breezes triggered Simon's instincts, he immediately assumed, no, hoped that you’re back, only to be disappointed. 

Discreetly entering the room and staring towards the open window, the man believed that it was perhaps a bunch of thieves who fled after they couldn't obtain any valuable goods. He sheathed the dagger after tugging down the cloth that's covering his lower face, then approached the feverishly blown curtains with the intent of wrapping them up but they succeeded in falling off from his grasp. Like there was some terrible impact, the drapes fluttered and slowly fell down after obscuring the scenery outside, standing out there, bare-footed on the balcony was you - glowing underneath the marvelous silky gleam, wings flexed widely to balance.

His head whipped up and yours tipped down, burnt chestnuts struck ambers, orbs widening.

Mouths moved in sync but no speech was heard. Time seemed to halt, breathing was labored and tremulous, chest heaving and gaze unwavering. 

Silent, awfully silent. 

Simon gulped hard and remained motionless as you brushed past him through the bumpy wooden door.

“Did ye come to admonish me?” You’re avoiding his presence, your tone was flat and mockery, back turned to him.

The man’s lack of response was not intentional, rather, he wasn't sure he followed you. The chilly air around as if millions of needles were pricking every cell in his shape made him realize he was not dreaming, you’re unharmed, he silently rejoiced.

“Where 'ave ye been?” The blond cautiously whispered, answered you with another question.

You huffed and shook your head frustratedly before directing your gaze towards a mountain of a man standing unfazed behind you. Your foot rhythmically tapped the ground, sounding clearly due to the awkward solitude, causing Simon to blink perplexed at your peculiar behaviour.

“Is tha’ a threat?”

“Wha’...?” The blond frowned. He couldn't fathom what you mean by that. Not to mention the unpleasant attitude of yours which successfully edged him.

It's only a typical question adhering to your prolonged absence. And a threat, what made you think that he’s threatening you?

“Wha’ do ye mean, ye were on my mind this whole ti-” 

“Oh don’t sell me a dog” You snapped, tongue poked into your cheek from inside of your mouth. Simon appeared startled, he understood nasty comments you could make at times, but this particular instance was just too much for him. 

With two bulky arms folded across the broad chest, the man inhaled deeply and approached you slowly, steely gazes never left yours - a warning. You haven't forgotten, just because Simon has a soft spot for you did not obligate him to pamper you always. You were doing this on purpose, and you knew he's aware of your intentions as well. Simon 'Ghost' Riley, a remorseless killer who was not to be messed with, cold-hearted and treacherous, the same as a phantom applied to him. 

But there was no other option, you had to push him away, as far as possible. 

“Look at me, luv” The blond’s low voice was almost inaudible, it was…..miserable and unpleased, which surprised you. 

With the others, Simon would not tolerate this insolence, and you remembered how much you enjoyed watching the plays out. Yet these calloused palms that have only performed dirty work here tenderly stroke your cheeks as though afraid of harming you, and those traumatized eyes this time sparkled with warmth that melted you and engulfed you irrevocably. 

This man was indeed a genius at making you feel like such a barb. He couldn't act like this, he's not allowed to. You could not withstand him being patient with you like this. No, you have to be tough, you’d not be willing to let the wall you've built be knocked down in such a hurry.

“‘M beggin ye, don’t chastise me like this” He plead, “Talk to me”

“Talk, ye said” You took a step back to escape the man's embrace and headed to your bed to begin packing, “From the man I have spent days with as a friend, I would have expected…more”. You paused for him to speak but he refused, so you continued, “More appreciation”

“What's exactly tha’ 'm not appreciating correctly?” 

“This!!” You expressed your anger with an elevated tone and lifted your arms to above your head, still being stubborn to not face him, “This goddamn circumstance….just why are ye so persistent?, 'm only tryin' to protect ye” From me, you wanted to shout out so bad.

“Luv…”

“Do not call me by tha’ name” You threw the corset into the luggage on your mattress exaggeratedly.

“I understand tha’ ye found such subjects as love, or devotion….a-and affection or attachment were frivolous and cliché. Then why, when do ye care so much?” You stuttered and steadied your lungs, again, waiting for him to say something, “Damnit Si, if ye don’t open yer-”

“I once thought ‘bout leaving everything behind to search for ye” One of Simon's habits was to start a conversation out of the blue.

Just like a slap to your face. Zipped your lips immediately.

“I used to believe tha’ my entire existence had no meaning after my family was murdered cruelly tha’ night….” He took a step closer, “....until I met ye”.

“Ye freed me from this torment, making me long to curl up in yer puffy feathers. It was ye who persuaded me tha’ s’alright to be Simon, making me weak before yer loving eyes as ye observed my hideous wounds” The blond was rarely verbal, you had no clue he could form such ethereal sentences like these, “Yer soft lips, voice, and smile...I yearn for all of ye” 

The shorter the distance between the two of you, the more his voice trailed off. Few inches left, his shadow towered over you and the melody of his heart beating was so near because simply a slight lean back would anchor you in his solid chest. You could tell by the rapid breathing fanning on the top of your head that those words had taken a lot out of him. 

“Nights after nights…..I dream of ye” The man snaked his muscle arms around your waist as he lowered his lips and nibbled your earlobe.

“I did not ask for this, luv….” Thick accent grumbled to your sensitive neck, “To be plagued by these feelings”, he sniffed “To be deluded by this, nah, your scent”

"I burn for ye"

The blond has succeeded in making your goosebumps and plumes stand on end. From the most primitively, females were drawn to males' maneuvers and growls, especially whilst in estrus. Simon appeared to have found out what was causing your symptoms, and you'd lose your composure if he kept turning you on. 

Knowing that you're unable to squirm away, Simon's restless hands started wandering all over your body as you gritted your teeth in an attempt to stop him, though it was clearly futile.

“We’re two separated species.....divided by blood and conduct” You hissed, held your shivering arm up to his sight and tore off the fabric, revealing the ugly claws and black digits. “Ye saw me that night, Si…..I’m a monster, the creature ye’re supposed to despise, to spit on, to put a spear through its head” 

Who’d you expect to cosset you for who you truly are when your tone was broken as your eyes were full of contempt when pierced at yourself? 

Nonsense

That's why your wrist was abruptly snatched and brought back. Before you could react,  from the corner of your eye, you watched Simon's pink tongue poke out and mapped a moist line down your elbow to your middle finger. The man flipped your arm over and did the exact same action, rejecting to avoid areas where the scales protruded jaggedly. As he planted several more kisses on your pointed talons, his long lashes trembled and his glossed honey pupils beckoned you. 

“Oh?” The blond grumbled and his brows furrowed unpleasantly, you swore his tone just dropped an octave lower than usually.

Morals fabricated anecdotes and beliefs to serve as spiritual sustenance when they were led astray by diseases or decimated by catastrophes. Owing to the absence of Mother Nature and you fairies, who were no longer offering them protection.

Gods, Saints, and other vacant illustrations have no effect on Simon - his life ended up being an utter misery. Blood, sweat, and tears, so much mayhem that his mind felt as if it was shrouded in fog.

Then when the blond focused on you - your wet locks sticking to the pale skin and wings slumping in ache, skeletal hands holding your bare frame like you were soothing yourself, creating the most poetic painting which had already been tarnished by bloody white rose petals scattered across the entire surface.

You sat there, bursting into tears, elegantly blending in with your surroundings. 

A fallen angel, his one and sole true goddess.

How vulgar was Simon that your devastated stage caused his sheer shaft to twitch eagerly, making his fists clenched hard so as to restrain himself.

"Should I prove ye wrong, sweet thang?" To you, he wished to make amends.

Your lips parted in surprise, and your mouth dried out compared to a desert amid the scorching heat. O Almighty Nak, you didn't dare to affirm but this man wanted you just as badly as you desired him.

The Aborigines' knowledge and trickery were ineffectual at this point since with Simon, you were nothing further than an idiot, and you’ve never told falsehoods - so no doubt that you’d gladly concede that inferior status if he said please with these lustly eyes.

Being a man of action, Simon swiftly scooped you off your feet and spun you around. You yelped when he tore your trousers away, grasping his forearms and expanding your wings in response to the unannounced action but immediately withdrew your hands since you had pricked him bled.

Not that easy, the blond hooked your thighs over his shoulder blades then reached out for your palms to lay them against his scalp, not letting go until you obediently held him with your own strength. 

"Steady" he cooed, making your core stirred with ecstasy. Bulky arms supported your soft arsecheeks and held you close, the man used his teeth to pry the tunic's hem out of his way and started pressing his face deeper between your legs.

It's the steaming breath coming from underneath that you felt first, eliciting a tiny mewl from you. His lips - feasting greedily on your clit, and the bridge of his nose with care nudged your labias as his tongue began to stir your inside. A wave of fulfillment crashed into you, blurring your vision and you arched your back to grant him a better access. The man adjusted the angle and firmly placed his whole mouth over your dripping cunt, kneading your plumps harder while humming with awe as your slender fingers began to claim the initiative.

“Dearest….” You swallowed and tried your best to not buck your hips too much, “I-’m feelin’ empty, still”

“Such a needy bird, aren’t ye?” He teased, low chuckle sending vibration, earning a lewd gasp from you.

Simon was quick to give in. His two thick rough digits found their way, slipping in and out of your softness expertly, causing your chest to rise and fall quicker. Raising a palm to rub your stiff paps, your gummy walls clenching as the blond thoughtfully tended to your swollen clit that was thought to be forgotten by his thumb.

Overwhelmed, you buried Simon's mouth deeper to your lower body, nearly suffocating him. He intensified his tempo, encouraged by your heels putting more pressure on his muscular back, chasing your almost giving up from denying arousal. 

So despicable, so seductive.

"Wait!" Your scream came out at the volume of a whisper, but the man was satisfied by the intense shaking of your limbs. Rather than letting you go hurriedly, Simon took his time sucking on your fragile sex, letting you ride your high out onto his face.

What Simon has been craving for so long was this, the taste of your devine.

One last lazy and molten stripe over the entire of your pond, hole to your bud, and he slid you down. Face to face, the mixture of saliva and slick glistening on the masculine lower visage of his boiled your blood and your wings flapped in embarrassment.

"Look at ye, down right flushed" Spoken with a cheeky grin and you smacked his bicep playfully, "If I knew ye could make these chirpy sounds, would’ve given ye ma face sooner, darlin’" 

"How can a gentleman talk so foully?" You laughed impotently, urging Simon to drop you down.

Hesitantly, the man quietly lowered you tip-toed on his feet before unbuttoning and slid the piece of clothing down from your subtle flesh. Calloused palms nonchalantly glided over the keloid scar that spanned from your collarbone to your navel, leaving innumerable splits around the wound's margins. Similar to a mountain surrounded by inescapable, endless abysses.

"It's a crime for a gentleman to leave his woman unjolly" His voice sounded sorrowful.

You understand Simon wasn't envious of you like you did, and you realized that if he was volunteering to expose his flaws to you, suppressing yours must have concerned him greatly.

So gently guiding the man to sit on the edge of your bed, you knelt between his legs and helped him remove his outerwear after. The blond sought to stop you, but you gave him a meaningful look, stopping him instead.

"If so, will this gentleman accept a proper punishment?" With a defeated grumble, he lifted his hand to stroke his messy hair as you offered him a toothy smile. 

“Right…’m all yers” 

This surreal feeling, if only your mouth had made Simon so aflame, the man didn't know if he could restrain himself when he's actually inside you.

Wet and filthy, your long tongue curled around his manhood and refused to let go as your head bobbed back and forth steadily. Despite leaving the window open, the room was unbearably humid since the naughty sticky noises you made while picking up the pace to please him. He really didn't want to bliss at the moment, he wanted to fill your inside till your needs were whole.

That explained why he lifted you up and positioned you on his meaty thighs. Your eyes widened as Simon smashed your lips together, all teeth and tongue, sloppy and ravenous, much like the yearning you two shared. Sliding one arm back and folding it up to grip Simon's shoulder, you rested your knees on the mattress and pointed the tip of his cock by your other hand directly at your entrance before slowly sinking down.

You both had to stop and struggle to regain your respiration due to the intrusion, though you two were feverishly nibbling each other's lips. Couldn't deny that the blond's thing was indeed large, but your pussy wasn't that loose either.

“Am I hurtin’ ye, luv?” Simon asked as your face scrunched up.

“S’not yer doin’” You chuckled breathily, earning a low giggle from the man. 

Once you were moving, Simon gave you one loving cup on your cheek and one firmly on your waist to assist in keeping you stable. You tipped your head into that toasty palm, lips rejoined and hips rocked in sync, lazily built up layers of ecstasy. 

The discomfort faded and evolved into bliss. Panting, moaning, praising, too inebriated with one another, you were on the verge of orgasm, yet you wanted more.

This wasn't enough. More intense, faster, you needed to be more drunk in Simon, but your strength was diminishing.

"Retreat yer wings, birdie," the blond commanded, sort of, and your body solely listened in an unconscious practice.

Quickly switching places and pinning you underneath him, Simon brought your legs over his shoulder and waist before thrusting into your damped cunt furiously. He massaged your bosom and lapped the other side relentlessly, got your pap to swell to a gorgeous hue.

“This’s what ye want?” 

“For. My. Cock. To. Shove. Deep. Into thi’ -ha- greedy hole….eh?” The man accentuated every word. His sturdy torso was straight up, however his hips continued the frantic pounding which drew not only the wild sounds from where the two of you were bonding, but also the creaking of the bed became more and more audible.

Your jaw dropped and your head bounced back, releasing a barrage of sultry mewls that Simon had to force you to suck on his calloused fingers to get yourself shushed. As the man's cock repeatedly kissed your quivering womb, full authority and brutally, you bet that your capacity of thinking straight was far gone for now.

“A-ah, Simon…inside, plea-se, inside me….” Your eyes shut tightly and nails clutched to the headboard, the heated and stirring sensation within your abdomen left you urging for Simon’s thick load.

“Ye’re gonna be the goddamn death of me” The man exhaled shakily and glued his forehead to yours, sweaty figures attached and your walls clenching his shaft tightly as you both appeared to be nearing your climax.

At last, the hot creamy semen stream was fully stuffed directly into your uterus. Simon growled with satisfaction as he dragged his shaft out and watched his essence leaking from your puffy flower. Collapsing beside you and engulfing your weary body in his chest, the blond rubbed soothing circles over your back while waiting for you both to calm down after the previous mating.

“Si” You called out for him sleepily.

“Yes, dear”

“I’m yers” You stated, “Every inches of me, belongs to ye……I belong to ye”

“And ye’ve own my soul ever since that night on the cruise, little bird” 

You snuggled closer and he tilted your face up by your chin, giving you the most loving kiss you’ve ever experienced in your lifetime.

_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Stepping gingerly into the galley, Simon walked right behind you, hands refused to let go. You were only wearing a baggy tunic and the blond was half-dressed with his trousers and bare upper body. If Simon hadn't insisted on coming along, you would've been the only one presented here.

"Ye sure we won't meet the others at th---?" Your mumble was cut off, peering inside to see Kyle, Soap, and the Captain were enjoying the biscuits around the marble island. No, sneaking.

"S'that truly..." The dark-skinned boy spoke up, not believing his eyes.

Hardly for you to form any sentence, Johnny had raced over and picked you up with a thrilled smile, making you squeal happily. Price also chuckled warmly and embraced you over the shoulders as welcoming you back. Kyle also managed to function again and rushed to greet you.

Everything was enjoyable until Simon hauled you in and caged you between his bulky arms. He glared at the other gentlemen, drawing their attention to the hem of your shirt, which covered just above your mid-thighs. They cleared their throats and turned away, flushing as you simply chuckled and patted the arms holding you.

It's great to be back home.

Taglist: @shadowlali , @ghostlythots (aggressively crushing you guys to my breasts)

[rescue-ram]

Now I'm curious, how would you adapt a modern version of Mash?

Oh man thank you for giving me pretext to ramble about this. I have too many thoughts about Cursed Hypothetical MASH Reboot.

Genre Change MASH is from the golden age of sitcom and is one of the best examples of the genre. Tragically, really good sitcoms don't get made, and the shorter lengths commissioned mean we wouldn't get space for the sillier or more experimental episodes that make MASH so charming and memorable. This is also why any remake or reimagining could never replace the original. There's also less "suspension of disbelief" with modern audiences, so I think modern MASH would have to have a more grounded setting and consistent time line, so RIP time loop. I think the modern genre that would best fit MASH is dramedy. Classico MASH already had elements of "get 'em laughing so they cry harder" and Hypothetical Remake MASH would play that up. Basically, we're gonna "Better Call Saul" this bitch.

In writing out my ideas below, I realized hitting the main plot beats I imagine makes this sound like. Depressing. Which it kind of would be! But I want to emphasize that in my mind's eye this would still tonally be a comedy right up until It Isn't. Similar to BCS, characters encounter obstacles, handle them in very funny ways, but things Keep Happening and compounding and at the end you realize all those funny things have added up to something horrific and inevitable.

General Thoughts In my beautiful mind, this is five twelve episode seasons, each corresponding to a roughly six month period- the first two seasons are 1951, climaxing with Henry's death, first episode or two of season 3 is Trapper leaving/BJ arriving and then 3/4 is 1952, and the final season is 1953 and the ceasefire. Fortunately, because the characters in MASH are pretty well fleshed out with a lot of traits I think they could be turned into dramedy characters pretty easily, and you can take the Big Things that happen to them and play them straight/expand on them into proper arcs. Also, pulling in more historical details could be really interesting, and an opportunity to unpack how Fully Evil the war in Korea was. In reading more memoirs from doctors who served in MASH units, I was struck by how much contact with international forces they had, and the surprising amount of contact with their Chinese/Korean counter-parts. I think more of both of those things would be fun to incorporate into Hypothetical Remake.

Expanded Roles for Nurses We need more women. And fortunately, we got them! Even though there is Not A Lot of existing canon, I really do think we have enough on the recurring nurses to act as seeds for fuller characters. I would love to see Kellye developed as a supporting character from the start. Struggling to articulate this, but I think a deeper perspective on anti-Asian sentiment could be explored through her, possibly with some connections to the history of colonialism in Korea in particular. The character was described as Chinese and Hawaiian, but given her credited surnames of Yamato and Nakamura getting a little into her Japanese heritage and the resentment of Koreans towards the Japanese could be interesting as well. I also think "Dish" Schneider's conflict, torn between loyalty to her husband/fiancee and her attraction to the handsome funny guy who relentlessly flirts with her, could be a source of drama. I also really like Ginger's recurring "thing" with Trapper in canon, and expanding that into an actual friendship and digging into the racism and taboos against interracial relationships of the period would be interesting. You can take Margie Cutler as a young and inexperienced nurse and give her a little coming of age arc. I would also love for Knocko McCarthy to be a foil for Margaret- as the second most senior nurse, she chafes under Margaret's command and kind of collaborates with the Swampmen to subvert her, culminating in Margaret calling her out that if she didn't side with them against her, they'd hate Knocko too, and them growing closer over the series.

Ho-Jon and Expanded Roles for Korean Characters Many have written about the shitty representation of Koreans in MASH, and Hypothetical Remake could remediate that significantly. I think giving Ho-Jon (or a similar new character) an expanded role would be good, with more ties to his family out of camp and conflict over whether or not supporting the occupying American forces and the south is the right thing to do or the expedient thing. I also think there's some dark comedy to be mined from a slightly subversive Ho-Jon taking advantage of racism and being seen as ignorant or interchangeable to get away with shit. Would love for Black Market Guy to be a recurring character. There's also a great real life story I read where a MASH surgeon formed a bond with a Chinese doctor after accidentally connecting to a PLA radio channel, and I think that could be adapted into a really fun source of comedy (bonding with "the enemy" over shared indignities, surprising similarities, etc) and ultimately drama (Hawkeye finds out about a US or ROK attack that will cripple that doctor's unit or put him in danger- does he say nothing, knowing hundreds will be injured or killed including maybe his new friend, or does he commit treason and risk prison or death to warn him- and how does he live with not knowing what happened when he has to choose inaction?) Any of the Very Special episodes could be adapted and expanded. And of course, Hypothetical Remake would have Korean writers, or consultants, or at the very least a goddamn baby name book so we don't end up with a dozen characters just named Kim, or worse random syllables.

Radar I would love to keep Radar as one of the main POV character throughout the whole series and use his unique position to bridge between different storylines- he's an enlisted man so he has that perspective, he's close with Hawkeye and the surgeons, he's assisting Henry/Potter so he has ties to command, give him a friendship with a nurse and you're set. Given the comedy-to-tragedy arc of dramadys, I would love to take the book detail that he enlisted with dreams of glory and becoming a general and lean fully into that. He starts out season 1 as a sweet naive farm kid flying by the seat of his pants to figure out his job, he gets more and more enmeshed with the military over the course of the series, currying favor with the brass to pull strings to help the unit/his friends/himself, and it ends with Potter giving him a recommendation for officer school- an outcome fully framed as a tragic loss of self to a corrupt institution.

Hawkeye I think Seasons 1 and 2 in particular could be driven by the Hawkeye and Trapper committing outrages and crimes in the name of justice/not giving a shit, and then having to spend the rest of the season engaging in more outrages and crimes to Bugs Bunny their way out of consequences. The central tragedy arcing through the series is the Destruction of Hawkeye Pierce. He starts out determined to stay himself, stick to his principles, and not let the army change him. The glimmer of hope at the end is that he has survived and gets to go home, but At What Cost. I also think making him bipolar makes the most sense- early season Hawkeye hints he's had highs and lows before, but always managed to cope, but under the increasing stress his mental health gets worse. Insomnia due to overwork triggers a manic episode (adapting Dr Pierce and Mr Hyde) about halfway through S1, with a major change in his relationship with Trapper associated with that, and his first on screen depressive episode triggered by Henry's death, which gets him his week of R&R he goes AWOL from. He holds it together through S3 with increasing amounts of self-medication for BJ's sake, and S4's overarching storyline for him is a fully Catch-22 expansion of The Late Captain Pierce with increasing levels of franticness to resolve it, and S5 is a full blown "I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE" crisis culminating in the equivalent of GFA, and a brief psychotic episode triggered by his mood dysregulation and moral injury. An expansion of The Late Captain Pierce would be a great source of absurdity and drama, the ultimate consequence of his alienation of Everyone In Bureaucracy or Command (they all dislike/hate him for his antics and disrespect in S1-3 and no one wants to help him in his predicament, with a few spitefully refusing to help outright), and necessary to explain his presence in Korea in 1953 since his enlistment should've ended by then (since key members of the bureaucracy Hate him they refuse to count the months he was "dead" as part of his service, and his father is in too poor of health/financially strained from his cancer scare to advocate for him successfully stateside). I also think "playing straight" all the nurses breaking up with him after Ceasefire could be interesting. Like, S1 Hawkeye is a ladies man who's saying all the right things and juggling multiple relationships, but after they realize he doesn't Capital L Love any of them they start to distance from him- not unfriendly, but less a source of support. That alienation from others, first with the nurses at the end of S1 then others in camp, causing a vicious cycle of increasingly erratic behavior leading to less support etc culminates in his breakdown towards the end of the series.

Trapper My beloved boy ♥️ who has less of an arc and more of a vibe in existing canon, so we get to make some shit up whole cloth. Either keep the book/movie canon they were friendly in college, or make them childhood friends- not close, but some kind of pre-existing relationship. First episode is them stealing a jeep and bonding as they get into Shenanigans and Danger on their way to camp. Some people have the headcanon that Trapper lost a brother in WWII because of Wayne Rogers' acting choices, and I think a backstory like that could be interesting. He starts out a little ambivalent about the war, not wanting to be there and very aware of the human costs, but also feeling he has a duty. As he and Hawkeye get into more and more Situations trying to expose war crimes or fix injustices and even basic supply issues and are met by indifference or incompetence, he gets disillusioned. After Hawkeye's manic episode, he decided the one Actually Good thing he can accomplish is keeping his friend sane until they can get back home, since he starts to increasingly see his medical work as futile and the UN intervention as hopeless/harmful. They get closer and rely on each other more and more in S2, and in my based and gay pilled vision this is explicitly romantic and sexual, albeit with serious ambiguity if they would've had this relationship outside the trauma of war. Towards the end of S2, Trapper starts to get sick, and it turns out stress and increased alcohol & tobacco use contributed to an ulcer- it almost seems like he'll be sent home, but as in Classico MASH he begins treatment at the 4077th- and then Henry dies. Hawkeye spirals and they have to send him away, and then Trapper has to help pick up the increased work load. His symptoms get worse and he tries to cope and hide it, and develops peritonitis. When he realizes he's going to be evacced to Tokyo and then back to the States, he has a bit of a fucking meltdown. Mission Failed, he can't be there for his friend, and he blames himself because it was partly caused by his alcohol abuse. This is not just me being a Trapper simp, he has to go home before his enlistment is up for plot reasons since we no longer get the benefit of fuzzy timeline, and the genre convention of dramedy is you always Reap The Whirlwind at the worst possible moment.

BJ Ironically, I don't need to change anything about BJ to turn him into a dramedy character. He already has a "negative character arc", and you just take the major beats of that, set them in a linear escalation, and tighten them up. He starts out bright eyed and idealistic, determined to keep his head up, do his duty, and get out. Hawkeye meets him at the air field, having missed Trapper. Hawkeye blames himself for Trapper's health problems, and wants to do better by the new guy, offering him support and guidance. BJ bonds with him through the craziness, but as stress increases he starts acting out in small petty stochastic pranks, and then Peg's letters and missing his family build his anger, and he lashes out at Hawkeye because he suspects (in that "he's not right but he isn't wrong either" way) that Hawkeye's friendship isn't really because of BJ himself but because BJ is Trapper's Replacement. He suspects Hawkeye and Trapper were more than friends and he's simultaneously jealous and repulsed- he wants to totally replace Trapper and for Hawkeye to like him best, but he also loves Peg and misses her terribly and resents Hawkeye for "making" him want him. His chaotic unhinged repression is funny until it's briefly terrifying, then sad. As Hawkeye's mental health deteriorates, he tries to be supportive, but is ultimately overwhelmed by the intensity of Hawkeye's crisis and pulls back, though they mend things somewhat at the end.

The Hawkeye/Trapper/BJ Nexus In summary, our core duos are codependent trainwrecks, but while TrapHawk are more of an enabling and felonious "Thelma and Louise" style folie a deux, BJ and Hawkeye are more of an epic highs and lows "if you can't be with the one you love love the one your with" "hand in unlovable hand" mess.

Margaret Don't have nearly as much to say about our girl because I suck and have been writing this for almost 2 hours now because I'm insane but she has one of the best character arcs in MASH and Hypothetical Remake would really just intentionally start laying out her conflicts and growth from episode 1. She would also have more independent story arcs of trying to manage the nurses, and navigating advancing her career in the face of sexism. I would love to see her messy and complicated relationships with powerful men explored more fully. She bonds with Frank first to have a relationship where she's more in control than with her superiors, then as an ally to push back against the TrapHawk Chaos, then as she grows more confident (and TrapHawk get in over their heads) she is able to let go of the cloak of power military pretensions give her and be more herself.

Henry and Potter Henry remains a lovable incompetent. The one headcanon I have I'd like to use in Hypothetical Remake is that he's pretty severely dyslexic- I base that off his mispronunciations and malapropisms and canonical issues with reading (in Classico MASH doing things like holding a paper upside down or not being able to read maps and the words on them). He got through med school by having his wife read his textbooks out loud and type his papers, and brute force memorization. This is part of why he over relies on Radar to manage his paperwork and is easily scammed into signing off on things- he really can't tell what he's signing unless he uses all of his focus to decipher the text, and he's a trusting person so he rarely does. @marley-manson I LOVE your take that your ideal Potter is the exact same character in the show but the narrative treats him as an antagonist, and that is the vibe Hypothetical Remake would have.

Frank and Charles Again not a lot to say here, secondary characters and minor antagonists, but they would remain big sources of commentary but their pathos would be played up more in a dramedy.

Mulcahy Again, not too much different from canon, just more intentional building of a tragic arc. A smart sensitive guy who grew up poor and thought the church would be a path to respect or maybe even greatness got told to be a math teacher by his diocese, enlisted as a chaplain when the war broke out as part of his personal quest for meaning and significance, is confronted by the horrors and damage to innocent lives but still tries to believe in a greater purpose and good to what's happening, struggles with feelings of powerlessness and futility, and when he's finally able to do something heroic loses his hearing, which costs him his vocation- he's permanently disabled and would be unable to return to his old role as a parish priest/school teacher.

Recurring Characters Sidney my beloved ♥️ We bring back Sam Pak as a returning character. Also General Hammond and other members of the brass. I think Oliver could work really well as a recurring character.

Klinger Whole bundle of thoughts on this guy I wanted to save till the end. Because I adore Klinger, he's incredibly funny and one of the kindest and most principled characters on the show, and he's also incredibly 70s and I don't think could work as he was in a 21st century dramedy. I can see three potential paths to adapting him. A) Lean into the young, brash, hustler side of his personality, and he's a straight guy who thinks the craziest thing someone could do is wear a dress. B) An explicitly gay character who refuses to admit to being gay for a discharge because he finds the idea of being judged less than or broken for his sexuality incredibly offensive, but did drag back in Toledo and also refuses to stop being himself just because he got drafted. C) Principled pacifist serving as an orderly because of the draft who refuses to wear the uniform and started wearing dresses as a protest against bullying/abuse- oh, your gonna call me a sissy and steal my clothes because I refuse to use a gun? I will not only wear a dress, I will zhuzh it up into something amazing, because I would rather wear this outfit you intend to humiliate me with than that damn uniform.

[doom-nerdo-666]

When i bring up "id lore", i mention how BJ in classic Wolf had a son who got into showbiz (Arthur Kenneth Blaze) and BJ’s wife is named Julia Marie Peterson.

While MachineGames replaced those with Anya and a twins, which in my opinion affects the relation to Keen and Doomguy.

But i forgot another thing: His parents in the official strategy guide/hint book are stated to be both Polish immigrants.

Wolfenstein 2 gives him an American born father called Rip Blazkowicz (though the surname could simply some Polish background too but still).

But there's also how modern BJ is from Texas while classic BJ is from Wisconsin (Can't find info on this part though).

[taintedcigs]

✦ STRESS RELIEF | steve harrington x f. reader ✦

wc: 1k+

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

warnings: 18+ !!smut, smut smut!!, MINORS DNI!! swearing, bj, or*l (male receiving), nicknames (sweetheart, baby, princess, etc.), praises!! lots of praises! vv soft!dom!steve, sub!reader, kind of aftercare!! 18+ ONLY!!!

summary: you help steve relax after a long day at work.

authors note: this was a little thought of mine that somehow turned into a 1k fic it is still short tho!! i did not proof-read this im v sorry for being so lazy. i do not like the pics they don't match BUT look how fucking DREAMY joe looks in a suit omfg, also PLS PLS leave some feedback they r my joy and hope!! and feel free to COME TALK TO ME IN ASKS, OR SEND ME A PM!! okay that's it enjoy!! mwah xo, em💌

you knew steve had a long day at work.

as soon as he came home he was seated on the couch, huffing as he mumbled something about how bad his day was.

his face was scrunched up, you could see that he was visibly stressed, it killed you to see him like this, and you were willing to do anything to cheer him up.

so, you offered to help him relax, and steve nodded mindlessly at that, thinking that you were going to give him a massage or something, he relaxed his shoulders, and his head was still filled with a lot of thoughts about work.

but as soon as you dropped down on your knees in front of him, your soft hands slowly parting his thighs, his thoughts disappeared immediately and his mouth almost drooled at the sight.

you, on your knees, as you looked up at him with a mischievous smirk plastered on your face, it was now etched into his brain forever.

he couldn't help but let out a relaxed sigh, his mind fuzzy when you helped him get rid of his pants, along with his boxers.

when his soft cock faced you, you wasted no time lazily pressing kisses at his pink tip, giving it kitten licks as you rested your hands on his thighs, giving them a massage.

soon with your hands fondling his balls, steve grunted softly, his eyes curiously watching you as pre-cum leaked out of his slit, you were quick to collect it with your thumb, making a show of it as you put your finger in your mouth, slowly licking it off while you remain eye contact with him, pretty noises escaping from your lips.

steve groaned lowly at your movements, his eyes rolling back in his head, blood rushing to his cock immediately. 'jesus, baby, you're gonna be the fuckin' death of me.' he mumbled huskily, making your lips twitch into a light smirk.

his cock twitched at the thought of your wet, warm mouth, and he was getting eager. 'had such a long day, sweetheart, need that warm mouth of yours...' he whined, and you were more than ready to oblige his request, your lips were quick to wrap around his cock, as he threw his head back in pleasure.

's-shit, baby, takin' me so fuckin' well.' he praised, mumbling and your mouth slowly sank down on his hardened cock, his breathing ragged as he fisted your hair in his hands.

'j-just like that sweetheart, such, a good fuckin' girl for me, yea?' he hummed and pushed your head lower on him, your muffled moans when you taste him were enough to bring him over the edge.

'not gonna last long, if you keep doing that- fuck.' he cursed as your lips were stretching around his cock, his groans getting louder now that the warmth of your mouth had engulfed him.

he buried his hands in your hair as he watched you take him in your mouth fully, his moans grew louder at the sight in front of him.

you, looking up at him, all doe-eyed, as your lips were wrapped around his length, he enjoyed fucking your face, his hips thrusting forward roughly as he watched his cock disappear slowly into your mouth.

when his tip hit the back of your throat, you gagged around him, the whimpers you made as you cried around his cock were enough to make him grunt loudly, he was in awe of how ethereal you are.

your hands are quick to replace the rest of him that doesn't fit into your mouth. 'fuuuck, mhmm, just like that, princess.' he praises, and you sink down faster on his length, enjoying the way steve's huge cock is stretching your throat as his groans are getting louder.

'i'm gonna cum, princess.' steve can't handle it anymore, the sight of you, the most beautiful girl, on your knees, innocently looking up at him, your mascara smudged, and your eyes pooling with tears.

your pretty lips wrapped around his length, drooling as you gag on his cock, saliva dripping down from your lips to your cleavage, and steve almost growls, wanting to lick and suck on your pretty tits.

the sounds you make as you are slobbering and choking on his cock make his eyes roll in the back of his head and he's sure he is in heaven, and he's sure that you are so fucking good to him, and so fucking perfect.

his hands grab a fistful of your hair as he starts fucking your face harder, his animalistic growls and the sound of his skin slapping against your mouth filling the room.

'mmpf, such a good fuckin' girl, gonna coat that pretty little throat with my cum, yea?' his hips jerk into your mouth faster now and you whimper around him.

'you want that pretty baby?' he asks almost mockingly, knowing you can't answer when your mouth is full, and you nod immediately, your moans muffled by his cock.

and with that, he lets out a loud groan, rope after rope of his warm cum coating your throat. 'fuuuck, take it all baby.' he instructs as you can feel him twitch in your mouth.

'take all of my fuckin' cum, princess.' you can feel his thighs shudder, and feel him fill your throat.

his hands are soft as they stroke your hair, steve's head is thrown back as he is riding out his orgasm, and you try to collect all of his load.

when you do, you stick your tongue out at him, showing you have lapped up all of his juices. steve gives you a slight smirk, praising you.

you swallow every drop, and you make sure to lick up any of his cum that might have spilled and a proud smirk is plastered upon steve's face. 'such a good girl for me.' he murmurs as he eyes you.

when his cock softens inside of your mouth, you pull your lips off of his length, making a popping sound as you grin up at him.

'are you relaxed now, stevie?' you ask giggly, and he pulls you up to his lap, nodding eagerly.

'for now, princess.' he presses a kiss to your lips, soft but still very needy, you whine when he breaks the kiss.

'i might need to use this to relax more.' he pinches your clit.

[aufucker]

(Pseudo) Diner Date

BJ/Jack

PREQUEL TO THE LAST FIC BC I FORGOT TO POST LOL

You were used to being up long before the sun rose.

Chores needing to be completed on your family's ranch before school started served for great preparation for your current life of supply runs on the company's dime, spending anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours putting in lumber orders for any bloodied boards or beams that needed to be replaced.

But you always liked to leave earlier if you could. You had a trucker diner you always enjoyed going to, taking the time to scarf down a plate of jalapeño scrambled eggs and almost over-seasoned home fries with your near endless coffee refills. Sometimes, you'd treat yourself to one of their giant waffles. A full stomach did make dealing with the other contractors waiting around much more tolerable.

You seated yourself into your favorite booth after saying your "G'mornin'" with an involuntary yawn. The burnt orange pleather, still only slightly warm from whomever sat last, with the glossy table inlayed with local advertisements of roofing repairs, movers, and landscaping professionals, only to be slightly textured from the stray grands of salt that somehow escaped the recent cleaning, digging into the skin of your forearms.

Your black coffee was served without question and with an almost familiar smile. You never were around long enough to have a fixed view of the server's faces, but the tones of their older voices were always so clear.

Opting to wait a moment before putting your order in, you sipped at your coffee, ears perking slightly as the door's hanging bell was jostled loudly by someone's entrance.

"Grab a seat wherever, hon, we'll be right wit'cha!" you knew that to be Colleen's voice.

And you knew that black and white jacket that walked in to be Dean's.

You both seemed surprised to see each other, you moreso at this hour with his noticeable lack of uniformed blues.

"Oh, fuck. Hey, B. Got you working today?" he asked, his tone low and a little tired. Sounded more like he woke up recently, rather than got off a shift.

"Mm-hmm. You ain't?" you asked into your cream colored mug, hiding the small grin that tugged your mouth as he slid into the booth in front of you.

"Nah. First day of PTO. Got a long ride ahead."

"Lucky fucker. Forgot you're usually gone 'round this time of year." you mused. He was usually long gone to god knows where before you even realized.

You earned a laugh from him. You hated how it made the tops of your ears burn.

He ordered his steak and eggs with water and black coffee, going on about trying to cut back on sugar amidst the chatter you two shared. He was vague about any questions you asked about his whole vacation.

"It's a sex thing, isn't it?" you asked flatly. "You're doing some weird sex shit in the woods or something."

That earned a snort, and a part of your waffle being promptly stolen and shoved into his mouth.

"You got me, B." he said. You knew you didn't.

"Hey! Thought you said you weren't eating sweet shit!"

"Said I was cutting back!" he grinned, wincing only slightly as you slightly-harder-than nudged his leg with your boot.

"Asshole. How long a drive you looking at?"

"'Bout a day, maybe day and a half. I try not to make unnecessary stops if I can help it." Dean mumbled, pulling out and laying down cash on the table. It was enough to cover your plate and the tip. You knew better than to try and argue about it.

But you were going to argue about the car. As the two of you stepped out, you didn't recognize it, it wasn't anything you had ever seen at his place before- an old beater of some sedan, probably from the late 90s, if you had to guess.

"You know that's not good for a poor old thing like that."

He stuffed his hands in his pockets, and you heard the plain clattering of his key. "Only drive it for these trips. It's fine, B. I promise."

You felt your time together waning quickly. Why did you want to keep stalling? Something about that car felt like a death trap, and you couldn't place why. It looked *fine.* Well maintained - the body had some flaking of paint, but that was expected with something as old as you were. Your ears kept perking up to the quiet shifting sounds it made. Was it still settling from his drive in? Probably the leaf springs... your mind was wandering.

With a sigh, you dug for your own keys to the company truck you rode in with, giving the grey haired man a firm look.

"Just take your time getting back, yeah? And make sure you get that thing checked out whenever you arrive to...wherever the fuck you're going, okay? Kinda don't want to hear you're stranded in Bumfuck, Nowhere."

"Alright, alright. I'll pop in to a mechanic on the way back, okay? Thing usually sits in one place the whole time, anyway."

God, you wanted to throttle him. "Text me when you get back. Okay?"