#BAHAHHAH WHY!!??!?!?!?
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lowkeyrobin · 10 months ago
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Hello! I was wondering (totally okay if not) if I could request a quackity x reader where there playing minwcraft or smth with a few other people and its just like moments of them annoying eachother (as a way of love if that makes sense)
Thank you 💜💜
AH YES OF COURSEEE!! ; did my best w this one, had to quote a lot of vines for this bc I'm not naturally funny and it made sense in a way
QUACKITY ; vinecraft
summary ; annoying each other while playing minecraft with some friends
warnings ; language
genre ; fluff
word count ; 711
masterlist
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You and Alex were playing on a Minecraft survival world with Bad and Niki. It wasn't a role-play SMP or anything, just a simple survival world with the Better Minecraft mod.
"Hurricane Katrina? More like Hurricane Tortilla!"
y/u/n was shot by a skeleton
"Y/n did you just willingly give yourself up to those skeletons?" Quackity laughs
"in my defense, they all have chainmail and gold armour, and I have an unbreaking one iron sword and a dream"
"Language! Stop talking about that!" Bad yells
"Yeah, stop talking about pussies, Quackity!"
"Y/n!" Bad and Quackity both exclaim in different tones while Niki laughs
"WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FORRRR?" Quackity yells, referring to the Vine as he almost breaks his voice a bit
"I'm waiting for those creepers to kill you," you answer, clicking your mouse to swing your hand as to point behind his character
"OH MY GOD NO-"
quackity was exploded by a creeper
"MY SHIT! Y/N, NIKI, GET IT PLEASE, I HAD AN AWESOME DIAMOND HELMET"
"It's Wednesday my dudes-"
"Shut the fuck up I'm fighting a warden, I can't do this right now, Alex!"
"I wanted to be a cowboyyyy baybyyyy" quackity speaks with a shit southern accent
"please stop fucking quoting that" you snicker, "I'm on the edge of this fuckin thing, if I fall I'll die and lose the teleporting thing and your shit"
"No off topic questions. because I don't want to. no. no. you've been stopped"
"PLEASE, I JUST WANNA MAKE THE PENIS, STOP DESTROYING IT Y/N/N"
quackity keeps trying to shoot you off the ledge of the mountain where you were trying to build the base on the side of
"I said whoever keeps shooting me, your moms a hoe!"
"language!"
"you're a hoe, motherfucker!"
"quackity, watch out!"
quackity was exploded by a creeper
"AGAIN!?"
yknow that vine of that kid playing simple piano notes and the other kid getting down to it? that's like the halftime show of the stream
quackitys playing guitar and you're busting it down in game next to niki who can't stop laughing, and bad is totally silent because of all the foul language
I mean the song slapped
then quackity got absolutely sniped by a skeleton while he was on two hearts
"What the fuck is up Kyle? no, what did you say? what the fuck, dude? step the fuck up kyle!"
quackity gets all up close with the mic to literally inhale it, "y/n i love you but my names not Kyle"
"WHATRE THOSE???"
"They are my crocs."
"Actually why do you own crocs? red flag, we're breaking up and I'm dating niki now"
"You move on quickly" quackity mumbles and rolls his eyes
nicki smiles before speaking, "because I'm better than you, quackity"
"Road work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does"
"Y/n you've spent 85% of this stream quoting Vines"
"Yeah I know, it's because I hate you"
"Wait what?"
when quackity brings up how he lived in the southern hemisphere and talks about living in Mexico, he pauses to breathe and you take the opportunity while you have it
"country boy I love youuuuuuuu. ah"
"WHAT THE FUCK?"
"BAHAHHAH"
"I can't be here anymore"
we've all seen the "Hey ron" "Hey billy" meme I think
you'll break into the base through the ceiling to get back in because you're working on a tunnel trailing through the inside of the cliff up to the top as the entrance
"Hey quackity" you say as you land next to quackity trying to sort through chests
"Hey y/n"
you scream as quackity sits down with some pizza in the middle of stream
he screams, "stop, you almost made me drop my pizza!"
yk that meme w the kid w the broomstick doing some anime pose battle shit? here's that one
you'll be swinging your sword around and spamming emotes "don't fuck with me! I have the power of God and anime on my side! AHHHH"
"who gave you the right to speak? You're on trial for breaking Bad's space bar!" Quackity exclaims
"I got it working again!!"
"let's do the fork in the garbage disposal!"
cue spamming emotes and lagging your games til they crash 💀💀💀
"love yourself! accept yourself!"
you became a positivity priest while quackity became a drug dealer
really splitting this world into two sides now LMFAO
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kazutora-kurokawa · 9 months ago
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BAHAHHAH IM GUESSIN IM LIKE WHAT THE 8 or 9TH???
Im just going to make a request for Hakkais <3
Jealous Kai that gets frustrated about you being close to Mitsuya.
You be into art and fashion so ur really close to Mitsuya and Kai just doest like the fact ur giving another person ur time and attention..
(I wish to see the other Hakkai ones. I GUESS MY BOY IS GETTING THE ATTENTION HE NEEDS 🫡)
Jealous!Hakkai x Artistic!Reader
♡ SFW, gn reader, fluff, slight angst + comfort, Mitsuya being oblivious to Hakkai's feelings, Hakkai feeling insecure in your relationship ♡
note: thanks for requesting anon 🩷 Hakkai has definitely been getting attention lately lol
❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀
💙 Hakkai loved you to death and of course he loved Mitsuya too, the two of you were very important to him
💙 He didn't mind you getting along with Mitsuya, but sometimes he felt like he was a third wheel in his own relationship
💙 So obviously he did what anyone would do and tried to avoid his feelings by bottling them up (pls don't do this)
💙 His insecurity slowly turned into frustration and he'd get really agitated whenever he saw you and Mitsuya talking and joking around with each other
💙 Mitsuya wasn't even aware of Hakkai's feelings, he figured he was just restless or in a bad mood
💙 Eventually he opened up to you and was shocked when all you did was chuckle
"Why are you laughing y/n? This isn't funny..."
"I'm sorry Kai, it's just so silly of you to think that I'd wanna be with Mitsuya when I have you right here. Stop doubting my love for you baby, I ain't going anywhere."
💙 He's on the verge of tears after that and all he can do is hold you tightly as you kiss him all over his face
❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀
Taglist
@arlerts-angel @i-literally-cant-with-this @trevengersprincess @giugiette @katkusuo @happy-trenchcoated-impala @drunkcheesecake @darkstarlight82 @reiners-milkbiddies @manji-hoe
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idkimboredrnsodoomscroll · 3 months ago
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Ok wait I’m so confused, why did Agatha loose her shit at Teen almost dying and Rio having to tell her it’s not hers if she knew all along (BAHAHHAH ALL ALONG HOLY SHIT) anyway, did she figure this out after Rio told her???? IM LOST BITCHES HELP ME SOMEONE DISCUSS WITH ME OR IM GOING TO FUCKING EXPLODE
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vibee2001 · 2 years ago
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Why is Toph just sitting there amongst all this chaos so funny to me BAHAHHAH!
Not Aang running back to his seat, that's so cute haha
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borathae · 8 months ago
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Chapter 16
OH MY GOD WE ARE NOT DEAD YAY HOBI
WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????
okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill
I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking
hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills
“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig
holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES
I’m just waiting for the day when vampire hunters break through the front door and shoot you guys.” im imagining them coming in fbi style FBI OPEN UP WE KNOW ITS SANGUIS hobi's cute dumbass - how did u know seokjin- you just proved it
this is why she isnt scared of you both 😭😭😭 reminds me of that tiktok asking whose house will you rob and everyone straight up said hobi in the comments 💀
imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??
ok hobi was 26 in 1982, so born in 1956 and is 68 so its 2024 hmm SO KOOK IS 94 WTF they are not even dilf, they are gilf 😭😭😭 wait in that case whats tae 😭 hold on jimin mentioned yoongi being older, is that in older than 800 years or turned at an older age?
I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one
wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875
“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭
“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol
“She bit my neck!” “And she bit my dick!” one got their throat ripped out and other ones dick. great just great. i just know, no vampire has a story like this, i mean sure neck being bitten but from a prostitute?? and dick being bitten hobi im sorry but thats a tragic comedy
A bang then a clash. bro this scared me so bad only to see its “Stupid raccoon don’t run away, come on let me spank your rubbish stealing buttocks!”
whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?
daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???
damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭
As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions
OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH
WHERES KOOK???? HIS BACK????
buckle in, that's where the angst begins 😭
okay this was like the calmest reaction to me being a vampire I have ever seen. hobari, my love, tae already told her thats why she is chill
Hobari gosh :( I miss them all together </3
I once had a girl literally run away from me screeching prayers.” xd HAHA imagine someone pulling out the cross at him and saying THE POWER CHRIST COMPELS YOU and him just blinking
JJADSFJ tbfh it's so valid though JFADJSJF
hobi baby, ik your are excited, but its quite the wrong time and person to test your new skills
FADSHJFJ HE IS SO CHAOTIC BAHAHHAH
“No, I’m not like Jungkook. I don’t go crazy at the smell or taste of blood. Especially not when yours tastes like literal ass right now, wow thanks ig
hhiihih he is so good in flirting hhiihih
holy shit no baby kook, im gonna fucking cry DONT PUNISH YOURSELF YOU SAVED US BOTH FUCK IM ALL TEARY EYES
I'M CRYING IN THE CLUB
imagine someone seeing their bodies in front of the house also was it tae or yoongi or someone else??
WHOOO KNOWWSSS not me (i know)
ok hobi was 26 in 1982, so born in 1956 and is 68 so its 2024 hmm SO KOOK IS 94 WTF they are not even dilf, they are gilf 😭😭😭 wait in that case whats tae 😭 hold on jimin mentioned yoongi being older, is that in older than 800 years or turned at an older age?
OKAY BEAR IN MIND!!!! I wrote this story in 2020 so it takes place in 2020. You have to subtract 4 years of their age during Sanguis Alpha. Also as far as your Yoongi question is concerned, we do not know yet what exactly he meant 👀
I was turned in 1875 by some random prostitute”, bitch pls 😭😭😭 he doesnt have a sob story nor a heroic one
fjajdfadjs he is so pathetic jfdajsf
wait something doesnt add up jin is 217, so if its 2024, he should be born in 1807, but he was 27 in 1875
Nooo it takes place in 2020 queen <3 no wait. WAIT my bisexual ass did the maths wrong HELP!!!! thanks for pointing it out I need to change the dates jfdjsjf
“Good that you ask because listen this is such a story”, ..“Oh god here we go again stop being a jealous bean just cuz u got turned by a hoe 😭😭
oh sweet summer child if only you knew jfdjsf
“Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. With that massive schlong that I carry around” you say sarcastically. you sure about that? was that foreshadow to the oneshot lol
BESTIE THE DOTS ARE CONNECTING FJDSJF
“She bit my neck!” “And she bit my dick!” one got their throat ripped out and other ones dick. great just great. i just know, no vampire has a story like this, i mean sure neck being bitten but from a prostitute?? and dick being bitten hobi im sorry but thats a tragic comedy
aahhaha they're so chaotic I love them fjadjf
whats calling her?? where is she going?? who is down there calling? 2seokook wont have something suspicious down there right?
the suspicionn
daisies and fresh sheets? is that jungkook? why is he down there? wtf HOW DID THE DARK CORRIDOR TURN BRIGHT???
THE SUSPICION
damn how hard did he hurt himself this is so heartbreaking let me get my blanket 😭
i'm crying so hard 😭
As long as I’m paralysed I’m no danger to you NO STOP whos cutting onions
LIKE PLEASE 😭😭😭
OMG SHE KISSED HIS CHEEK IM BLUSHING LIKE IM THE ONE WHO GOT KISSED AAAH
THEY'RE SO CUTUUTUTEEEE
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aiko-the-weapons-robot · 2 months ago
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💚TAISHO ERA SECRET☀️
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Tanjiro: "Now It's time for today's Taisho Era Secret!"
"Hey Kana, I heard you have some pretty bad vision. Is that why you have the blindfold on?"
Kana: Shakes her head "No no! I have it so I can fight better. I rely on my eyes too much so I wear this blindfold to stop it. Pretty cool right?"
Nezuko: "Mmmm?"
Tanjiro: "I think it is very cool! Just worrying... But if that's what helps you then go with it!" He smiles
Inosuke: "The great Inosuke dosen't need to see to fight BAHAHHAH!! Hana's the same way!"
Tanjiro: "Her name is Kana!"
Inosuke: "SHUT UP GOMPACHIRO!"
Tanjiro: He sighs "It's Tanjiro!"
Tanjiro and Inosuke continue to argue, cutting to Zenitsu, Kana and Nezuko on the side.
Zenitsu: Holding his ears "S-so uhm... Why is your vision so bad?"
Kana: "I don't know.... I don't think I want to remember..." Looks down at the ground. "I don't think my eye sight was always like this?"
Nezuko: Pat pat "Mmmph"
---------------------------------
[TW: abuse mentioned]
The reason Kana's eyesight is so bad is because of past abuse, mainly from her two older siblings. Kana had some pretty good eyesight, nothing wrong with it. But she loved to point out small things others wouldn't notice until being pointed out such as a small crack in the wood or a spider in the corner of the room. Because of this, her older siblings found it annoying and grew jealous of her so they would hold her head to stare at the sunlight until she started to cry. This happened so many times Kana is practically unaffected by the sunlight but this caused her vision to decree. This started just before she was abandoned in the forest so the abuse didn't go on long enough to go blind.
[asked by @matthew-knyshait]
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 1 year ago
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CE was so drunk that day and embarrassed himself so bad😭 The GIFS are so embarrassing
I hate it bahahhah. It's funny bc why not when ur famous but oh god. That mic has so much spit on it, my man.
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elderwisp · 6 months ago
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I have this song on my playlist and I don't know why it reminded me of atlas 🧍‍♂️
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BAHAHHAH THE MUGSHOT BUT ALSO OMG NEW ARTIST FOR ME TO LISTEN TO ! I feel like this would be Atlas:
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Completely off topic but I have seen that photo sm on my Pinterest so it’s neat to see it belongs to an artist! :O
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satellite-starss · 2 years ago
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why u checkmarks gay /pos
I GOT TWO ASKS LIKE THIS AND I DIDMT UNDERSTAND TILL I UPDATED MY APP BAHAHHAH- they still looked blue too me 💀
i have no idea tumblr did it 💞✨ they diagnosed me with the fruity/pos
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asahicore · 2 years ago
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I just had to reply, because I'm so excited, I have no one to talk about kdramas...
I've seen hye-sun in a few kdramas before, but her acting in this one is getting to me in a whole another level; the way you can see and feel her yearning from her expression to her body language, ugh, it's just to good. I also love ji-eum x cho-won interactions, I'm so looking forward for the moment she calls her unnie again.
OMG!! I need to talk about the scene with "her mom" (iykwim). I was so excited, like, the moment was so precious and so heartbreaking, but it just worked that way. Ig love hurting myself. 🥲 I just, Idk, I want to see ji-eum happy with those of her 18th life, 'cause I get the deep affection she developed for them.
please, I'm begging for the writers to let me have a happy ending in this one.
you're right, tho. kdramad do tend to be like that, like, I had the same conflict with itaewon class; saeroyi knowing exactly when things would happen for him was tripping me out.
btw, you don't have to feel sorry for not watching the recs. kdramas can be a lot of time consuming, especially when you don't know korean and can't watch it at the same time you're doing something else. I know the struggle. 😪
— ☕️! anon
omg u can talk to me about kdramas anytime i love talking about them !!!
oh my god i hadnt even thought about chowon calling jieum unnie again.. gonna make me cry for sure.. i cant wait 5 hours anymore i need the episode now i have a feeling this weekend's eps will be when chowon figures it out 😭 and i def need to look into hye-sun's dramas!!! shes so good at subtle expressions ugh
that scene with her mom... dont even. i was ugly crying as it was happening and when it turned out to be not real i was DEVASTATED. WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO US??? same, i just want to see her reunited with her 18th life family is that so much to ask... and im also so happy we get to see snippets of her other previous lives, theyre so interesting, icb they made her the inventor of soju thats so insane 😭
i have a feeling it will be a happy ending though!!! like theres so many soft vibes and you can already tell seo-ha is warming up to her so i'm sure things will go their way, otherwise i will riot <3 and oh my god, i did not like itaewon class and that was one of the reasons!! saeroyi was this perfect guy that always either had things going his way or knew how to get out of them every single time lol
thank u<33 and yes omg i wanna be able to understand korean better so i can multitask while watching them 😭 for dramas that are a bit slow ive just started watching them in 1,25x or 1,5x speed bahahhah
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seitmai · 6 months ago
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I once again have so much to say lmao
He'd been touching you nonstop since he brought you home from the hospital. If you were awake, his body was in contact with yours, and his hands were on your belly. And when you slept, he seemed to miraculously clean the house and walk Tramp and make edible food.
The dream
With those words, you were on your back once again, and Bradley's lips were skimming along your belly. "Hey, Rosie. You having fun in there?" He grinned and glanced up at you, letting his mustache tickle your skin as he said, "Daddy would love to be inside Mommy, too."
Bahahah this cracked me up so bad 😂
"Damn," Maria said as you took the seat across from her. "He means business."
Oh he sure does
"You're so fucking lucky you have such a bossy husband," he complained. "And one with a mustache. If I didn't like you so much, I would hate you." You watched Bradley's broad back as he exited the restaurant and headed toward the red Bronco, pushing his sunglasses into place as he went. "I would probably hate me, too,"
So true lmao
You mom taught him how to make overnight oatmeal in the slow cooker, which seemed to be the only kitchen appliance that he was able to master on the first try. He fucking loved that thing; you just tossed food into it, and it turned into a meal like magic. He vaguely remembered his mom having one, which just made it even better.
That man is soon gonna have a Pinterest board dedicated to slow cooker meal and there is nothing wrong with that 😌
When he got to base, everyone was asking about you. "She's at home resting," he assured Nat. "She's sore and tired, but the baby is moving around a bunch. I'm taking them to get checked out again at lunchtime today. Oh, and thanks for getting groceries for me. And driving me to the emergency room. And making sure I didn't have a full nervous breakdown."
It takes a village and they have the best 🥹🥰
Nat gave him a big hug. "Literally what I'm here for, Soul Sister. Just keep me in mind when nominations come out for godparents," she told him with a wink.
She should obviously be first choice lol
You squeaked in delight and practically ran out of the room. "Let's get going," you called over your shoulder. "The sooner we ask, the sooner we can potentially fuck."
Bahahhah😂
Bradley drove with the radio playing softly, and eventually you squeezed his fingers and admitted, "I am a little nervous though." So was he, but he wasn't going to tell you that. "We'll figure it out. You don't have to worry about it alone."
🥹🥹🥹
"Right," you agreed. "And is it safe to fuck my husband?" "Sweetheart," Bradley groaned, resting his forehead against your arm in embarrassment. "What?" you asked while Dr. Morris chuckled. "You wanted to know, too!"
Dr. Morris is probably like: Oh these two cute horndogs again 😅
"Absolutely fucking not," he replied, feeling much better but still wanting you to rest a little more. "I'm going to take you back home where you will relax and eat a healthy snack, and then I'll come home and make dinner." You looked up at him in awe. "Those are words I legitimately never thought I would hear you say unironically." "Get used to them,"
Say no more 😌🫡
"Is that why it always tasted so much better when you made it? I never did that before today."
That is absolutely hilarious, that he didn't know that he should salt the pasta water 😂
He kissed your forehead as he muttered, "Taking perfect care of my girls. I'll get you home and feed you dinner, and then we can start packing for our trip before you go to bed early. Oh, and I got the Nugget on the waitlist for daycare today." "Bradley," you moaned, leaning into him. "You're the best husband. And like seriously, I don't even know how to deal with how fucking much that turns me on."
🤤🥵😮‍💨
Aim for the Sky Part 11 | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Bradley is determined to take care of everything so you can take take care of Rose. A visit to your doctor answers a lot of questions, and Bradley is hoping he can still give you the babymoon that he promised.
Warnings: Angst, injury, potential pregnancy complications, fluff, smut
Length: 4200 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader
Aim for the Sky masterlist. This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.
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Bradley had you eating three square meals a day all weekend long. He spent more time talking to your mom than you did, and she helped him cook while you took little naps. Any time food was mentioned, in any capacity, he got you involved.
"Cam and Maria want to know if I'm interested in going out for a belated birthday brunch since I'm feeling a bit better," you told him as you read your texts on Sunday morning.
"Tell them yes," Bradley replied where he was still in bed next to you with his head on your shoulder and his eyes closed. "But I'll drop you off and pick you up." His rough fingers tracing an intricate pattern along your skin from your belly up to your breasts, and you knew better than to argue with him.
"Okay," you murmured as he kissed along the side of your breast. He'd been touching you nonstop since he brought you home from the hospital. If you were awake, his body was in contact with yours, and his hands were on your belly. And when you slept, he seemed to miraculously clean the house and walk Tramp and make edible food. But while he'd been touching you constantly, he didn't initiate sex, and neither did you.
Truthfully, your hand was still aching a bit, and every time you felt Rose move, you silently rejoiced. Your body was sore, and you just kept wanting to go back to sleep. You found yourself stifling yawn after yawn, and you knew Bradley had noticed by the way he kept ushering you back to bed. Of course he would be very gentle with you, but right now, you didn't need anything more than what he was giving you.
Quickly, you finished texting Cam and Maria, then you tossed your phone aside. When you rolled Bradley onto his back, he was smiling as he whispered, "How's my Nugget?" while he played with your necklace charms.
Your visit to the emergency room after you fell at work had been terrifying, but having Bradley around always made you feel stronger. "Why don't you ask her yourself?"
With those words, you were on your back once again, and Bradley's lips were skimming along your belly. "Hey, Rosie. You having fun in there?" He grinned and glanced up at you, letting his mustache tickle your skin as he said, "Daddy would love to be inside Mommy, too."
You snorted in response, something stirring the way it always did when Bradley's big, brown eyes were focused on you. "I mean... I don't have to be at brunch until eleven."
His biceps were on display along with his messy hair, and you were never going to stop wanting him. But he was shaking his head slowly as he told you, "I'm in no rush to make that happen. Let's see what Dr. Morris says tomorrow. You're supposed to be taking it easy, and so is Rose."
"You're right," you agreed, still biting your lip as the sensation of Bradley's mouth on your body.
"I love you," he whispered against your belly before hovering over your body to kiss your lips. "And I love you, Sweetheart. And you're never allowed to scare me again."
When he eventually drove you to brunch, he refused to just drop you off and come back. Instead, he walked you inside, his big hand wrapped around yours, and took you all the way to the table where Cam and Maria were waiting. 
"Hey," he greeted your friends, yanking his aviators down his nose as he wrapped his arm around you. "She's supposed to be eating plenty of healthy foods rich with nutrients and vitamins. Can the two of you be responsible for what she orders?"
"Roo," you whined, rolling your eyes, but your friends just nodded up at your husband.
"Yes," they recited in unison.
"Excellent," Bradley replied, largely ignoring your complaints as he added, "And you'll make sure she drinks at least three glasses of water?"
"Yes," they repeated.
"Perfect," he muttered, leaning in to give you a kiss while his hand slid down your belly. "Text me when you want me to come get you, Sweetheart."
As he walked away, you sighed, but both of your friends had their eyes glued to him. "Damn," Maria said as you took the seat across from her. "He means business."
Cam bit his knuckle before he picked up the menu as if he didn't already know what he was going to order. "You're so fucking lucky you have such a bossy husband," he complained. "And one with a mustache. If I didn't like you so much, I would hate you."
You watched Bradley's broad back as he exited the restaurant and headed toward the red Bronco, pushing his sunglasses into place as he went. "I would probably hate me, too," you murmured, picking up your first of three glasses of water and taking a long sip.
---------------------------
Bradley ran around with his checklist on Monday morning so he didn't forget anything. You mom taught him how to make overnight oatmeal in the slow cooker, which seemed to be the only kitchen appliance that he was able to master on the first try. He fucking loved that thing; you just tossed food into it, and it turned into a meal like magic. He vaguely remembered his mom having one, which just made it even better.
Every time he thought about his parents, he had to stop and catch his breath. His desire to do this right was overwhelming. After you fell at work, he knew there was no margin for error. He filled up a cup with water and carried it back to the bedroom where he hoped you were still asleep, but you weren't even there.
"Baby Girl?" he called out, but then he heard the toilet flush and the sink run before you shuffled back in from the bathroom.
"You're making me drink too much water," you grumbled as he ushered you back to bed. "I can't stop peeing."
He set the new cup down and picked up the used one. "Just humor me, please. I'll come back to pick you up at 11:45 to take you to Dr. Morris. I'll feel a lot better after she examines the two of you, and I have a list of seventeen questions for her."
You looked at him like he was joking. He wasn't. "Mmkay, Roo. Come back and get me later," you said, kissing his lips before climbing back into bed. 
When he got to base, everyone was asking about you."She's at home resting," he assured Nat. "She's sore and tired, but the baby is moving around a bunch. I'm taking them to get checked out again at lunchtime today. Oh, and thanks for getting groceries for me. And driving me to the emergency room. And making sure I didn't have a full nervous breakdown."
Nat gave him a big hug. "Literally what I'm here for, Soul Sister. Just keep me in mind when nominations come out for godparents," she told him with a wink.
"Huh," he grunted, because he hadn't even thought about that. If he had to choose someone, he would probably want it to be Nat, but he didn't know where you stood on the topic, so he didn't say another word about it. When he had to get in his Super Hornet and take off, his mind shifted back to Friday, and a flash of panic went through his body as his wheels left the runway. 
"Rooster, do you copy?" He realized Maverick had asked him something, but he had no idea what. All he could picture was your tear streaked face as you lay in the hospital bed shivering.
"Say again?" he asked, hand gripping the throttle as he tried to focus. He should have used a vacation day, but he was trying to save them up for after the baby was born. He was kind of terrified that you'd have to go out on medical leave, and he knew he wasn't going to feel better about any of this until he heard from Dr. Morris.
"Meet Payback at the rendezvous point," Maverick repeated, and Bradley pushed his nervous energy to the side. How much trouble could you get into at home with Tramp anyway?
The answer was apparently a lot. When he walked in the door to pick you up for your appointment, he headed for the bedroom only to find you sitting on the floor of the baby's nursery with the dog next to you. "What are you doing?" he asked with a sigh. "You were supposed to be resting all morning."
"Relax," you told him, holding up your hands in surrender. "I got bored, so I just started sorting the baby clothes."
He cradled his forehead in his hand. "Baby Girl. You're killing me. Tell me you at least ate lunch? And drank enough water?"
"Three glasses of water," you replied, holding up three fingers and nodding. "And a peanut butter and hot sauce and jelly sandwich. And carrot sticks dipped in ketchup."
Bradley wanted to gag just thinking about it, but he supposed that was actually pretty good for you. "Excellent," he replied, reaching down to help you stand up. "We need to get going. Now."
"Oh," you whispered, kissing his cheek once you were on your feet. "You're really hot when you're being bossy."
Bradley sighed and let his head tip back as you ran your hand down the front of his flight suit. "If, and only if, Dr. Morris says having sex is okay, I could get real bossy with you later if you give me an attitude about eating your dinner."
You squeaked in delight and practically ran out of the room. "Let's get going," you called over your shoulder. "The sooner we ask, the sooner we can potentially fuck."
Bradley grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator on his way to help you put your shoes on, and he was trying not to laugh the entire time. "Drink this," he told you before tying your shoes. Then he kissed you hard before leading you out to the red Bronco.
Once he backed out of the driveway, you reached for his hand. Bradley drove with the radio playing softly, and eventually you squeezed his fingers and admitted, "I am a little nervous though."
So was he, but he wasn't going to tell you that. "We'll figure it out. You don't have to worry about it alone."
He held your hand in the waiting room, and he had his arm wrapped around you when the nurse called you back to be examined. They took about a million samples from you before you were allowed to get cozy on the exam table with him sitting by your side, gently rubbing your left hand without touching your stitches. He was just thinking about what he was going to cook for dinner when Dr. Morris finally walked in.
"It sounds like you had a bit of a scare on Friday," she remarked, carrying your chart in her hand.
"Yes," you said sheepishly. "It was really scary."
"Well," she sighed, taking a seat with a smile, "let's take a look."
You were gripping Bradley's hand as Dr. Morris got the ultrasound equipment ready, and a few seconds later, Rose was squirming around on the huge monitor. "She got so big," he gasped. "Sweetheart, look at her!"
"I see her, Roo."
Dr. Morris looked completely calm, but Bradley asked, "Is she okay? After the fall?"
"She's just fine. Heartbeat is good. She's nice and strong."
"Excellent," he replied while you laughed in relief.
"However," Dr. Morris added, making his heart skip a beat, "we do need to talk about preeclampsia."
Your face fell when Bradley looked at you. "I have preeclampsia?" you asked softly.
Your doctor nodded. "A mild case, but yes. The baby looks fantastic, but I'm going to need you to monitor your blood pressure daily at home. And I have a list of foods you should eat as well as ones to avoid. And you need to eat and drink regularly so you don't faint again."
"Am I allowed to go back to work?" you asked.
"Yes. With the promise that you won't overdo it. And if you start to feel light headed, you need to sit down immediately and call me."
"Right," you agreed. "And is it safe to fuck my husband?"
"Sweetheart," Bradley groaned, resting his forehead against your arm in embarrassment.
"What?" you asked while Dr. Morris chuckled. "You wanted to know, too!"
Bradley shook his head as your doctor had mercy on him and said, "You can absolutely have sex with your husband as long as it's not causing you stress or raising your blood pressure too much. Monitor it. Keep an eye on it."
"Right," you agreed again, giving Bradley side eye as he pulled a sheet of paper out of his pocket.
"I have a few more questions for you, Dr. Morris. If you don't mind." He cleared his throat and started to read his seventeen questions, nodding at each answer until he got to his last one. "And how about a babymoon vacation? Is that something we can do?"
"I don't see why not," she said with a smirk. "Assuming your blood pressure doesn't get too high, and as long as you go in the next few weeks if air travel is involved. You're only ten weeks or so from your due date."
Well, that certainly put things into perspective for Bradley. He had a few ideas of where he wanted to take you, but now he was going to have to plan quickly and try to get some days off from work. 
"Do you think I should change into my maternity tent and go to work for the afternoon?" you asked as he led you out of the appointment.
"Absolutely fucking not," he replied, feeling much better but still wanting you to rest a little more. "I'm going to take you back home where you will relax and eat a healthy snack, and then I'll come home and make dinner."
You looked up at him in awe. "Those are words I legitimately never thought I would hear you say unironically."
"Get used to them," he murmured, leaning down to kiss you before you climbed into the Bronco. "And you better not give me an attitude about it, or else I could end up getting really bossy." He clicked your seatbelt into place with a grin as you clapped your hands.
--------------------------------
"You made spaghetti?" you asked, arms crossed over your chest.
"Yes," Bradley replied easily where he stood in the kitchen hours later wearing your I Love Meat apron and holding a slotted spoon. "Is there a problem with that?"
"Yeah. I'm not eating it. I don't want spaghetti."
"Hmm," Bradley hummed, carefully setting down the spoon and turning off the stove burner. "It sounds like you're giving me an attitude."
You had to squeeze your thighs together, already so turned on as he closed the distance to you while you said, "Maybe I am." You jutted your chin out at him and added, "What are you going to do about it?"
His gaze dipped down from your face to your breasts which were practically spilling out of your stretchy tank top. He had an erection which you could clearly see through his gym shorts and the apron. "I'm going to give you an attitude adjustment," he growled, pulling you closer to him. "And then you're going to eat the fucking dinner that I made for you without complaining."
You were already panting for him, so excited over this little roleplay exercise, but you squealed in surprise when he yanked your top clear off and and immediately got handsy. His thumbs were rough on your nipples as he stroked them and pressed your breasts together. Then he let his right hand slide down your backside where he gave you one soft swat and barked, "Hands on the counter."
You did as you were told, already rolling your hips as he stood behind you and yanked your shorts and underwear down. "Bradley," you whined when you saw the apron fall to the floor at your feet, and a second later, he was pushing his cock inside your pussy as you bent a little more.
He planted his hands on the counter next to both of yours, and he ran his thumb gently along the spot near your stitches as he pushed himself deep. You felt his mustache on your ear as he whispered, "Make sure you relax. No high blood pressure for you, Sweetheart. I love you." Then he started fucking you nice and hard as he growled, "You've had a bad attitude all day. You know that? It's about time I fucked it out of you."
"Oh god!" you moaned in excitement. "Please do, Daddy."
He went hard, alternating between talking sweet and scolding you for being bad. "You're so damn hot, I can barely stand it," he crooned. "You'll eat the fucking dinner I made, and you'll say thank you," he grunted, getting you more and more worked up as you gripped at the countertop. "You gonna eat the spaghetti?" he asked, fingers dipping below your belly to find your clit. "Huh?"
"Yes!" you shouted, eyes fluttering closed as he stroked you in slow circles that got faster and tighter. "Yes!"
Bradley's lips were pressed to the sensitive spot behind your ear, and you were treated to the deep, guttural sounds he made as his hips slapped against your butt. "Come on, Baby Girl. Come on." As soon as you felt that first perfect clench of your ograsm, he was coming too. "That's it," he groaned. "That's a good girl."
You were still bumping your body back against his, coming down from your high, when he wrapped both hands around to your belly and asked, "You feel okay? The Nugget's okay?"
"So good," you gasped, finally pulling your hands away from the counter. "Perfect."
You spun in his arms with a smile on your face, and your belly bumped his abs. His cheeks were all flushed, and he looked a little tired, but he was smiling as his cum dripped down your thighs. "You hungry for the spaghetti?" he asked, stroking your cheek with his fingers.
"Starving," you replied, finally sated.
Two minutes later, you were sitting on Bradley's lap at the dining room table with one huge plate of spaghetti and two glasses of water. "I can't believe you made this. It smells incredible, Roo," you praised. 
"Your mom helped a lot," he replied, but you could hear the pride in his voice. "Did you know you're supposed to add salt to the water before you cook pasta?"
You tried not to laugh as you twirled spaghetti onto your fork and took a bite. "This is delicious. And yes, I did know that."
"Is that why it always tasted so much better when you made it? I never did that before today."
God, you loved him so much, it was ridiculous. You'd been cooking for the two of you for years now, but he stepped out of his comfort zone as soon as you fell at work, knowing you couldn't keep doing all of this by yourself. Instead of answering his question, you said, "I could never love anyone else as much as I love you."
"Same," he replied easily. "It's just you and Rosie for me. That's why I spent my afternoon planning out the perfect babymoon."
"You did?" you asked, turning to look at him over your shoulder.
"Keep eating, and I'll tell you more," he promised, nudging your shoulder before taking a bite for himself. 
Once you were eating again, he said, "As long as you can get a few days off at the end of the month, I want to take you somewhere that is plentiful with hot sauce."
"Del Mar?" you asked, thinking of the hot sauce restaurant and the reservation you missed on your birthday.
He gave you a bland look. "Come on, even I can do better than that."
"I don't know," you said with a laugh, and he nudged you again to take another forkful.
"Beautiful beaches. Spicy food. And a hot sauce making workshop," he whispered, and you nearly dropped your fork.
"You and Jake didn't try to make hot sauce again, did you?" When you thought about the disgusting bottle of spicy vinegar your husband brought home as a treat, you almost wanted to cry. "Please tell me no."
"Sweetheart," he said with a laugh. "I'm talking about Mexico!"
"Oh!" you gasped in excitement.
He looked so pleased with himself as he said, "It's a short plane ride away. We'll just go for a few days. It'll be like our honeymoon in Hawaii all over again, but this time you'll be pregnant in your little red bikini with your rooster tattoo on display."
You bit your lip as his hand settled on your thigh. "You really thought this through."
"I did," he replied. "You wanted a babymoon, and Dr. Morris said it's okay, so you're getting a babymoon. Now let's finish eating so I can check your blood pressure and clean the kitchen."
---------------------------
The next few weeks of work were tedious. Your lab mates often treated you like you were made out of porcelain, about to fall over at the slightest inconvenience. Even Bickel got into a bit of a habit of going easy on you before you met with him to tell him you were eating and staying hydrated and could carry your normal workload.
"I'm going to get something to drink," Cat told you one day as you sat in front of your computer working some calculations in the software. "Do you want anything? Maybe a snack?"
"You don't have to be so nice to me right now," you replied. "In fact, please don't."
She scoffed. "Are you trying to insinuate that I'm usually mean to you or something?"
You looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "You're certainly never this nice. And I mean that in a good way. I think I got used to you being a bit rough around the edges most of the time, and I like it that way."
"Who took care of your wedding rings?" she asked. "And who helped you battle your morning sickness in Annapolis?"
"You did," you replied easily. "But you're never this sweet to anyone besides Jeremiah and Jake. The two loves of your life."
She was silent for a beat before she said, "I'll just get you some juice." She left the lab, and you smiled. Jake wanted to get married, but she was putting up a hell of a fight even as she was steadily paying down the debt her husband accrued while Jake paid for Jeremiah's daycare on base.
You groaned and rubbed your eyes as you yawned. Getting Rose on the waitlist for the daycare was something you kept forgetting to take care of, and it really needed to be done. You were leaving for Mexico in just a few days, but there were so many things you wanted to take care of first. Maybe you could ask Bradley to take care of this one agenda item, since he kept insisting your top priority was taking care of yourself. You could practically hear him tell you that the only person he trusted with the loves of his life was you.
By the time he met you in the parking garage at the end of the day, you were yawning nonstop. "Hey, I don't like that," he said right away, jogging the last bit to get to you. "You're really tired, Sweetheart."
"I am," you agreed. "But I ate a salad and an enormous bowl of soup for lunch, and I had two snacks today."
He kissed your forehead as he muttered, "Taking perfect care of my girls. I'll get you home and feed you dinner, and then we can start packing for our trip before you go to bed early. Oh, and I got the Nugget on the waitlist for daycare today."
"Bradley," you moaned, leaning into him. "You're the best husband. And like seriously, I don't even know how to deal with how fucking much that turns me on."
He kissed your forehead again and said, "Okay, we can definitely add sex to the agenda if we stop wasting time and head home immediately."
"I'll get undressed while you drive," you joked, playfully unbuttoning your horrible shirt while he buckled you in.
"Baby Girl, those massive tits could cause an accident," he warned before he groaned. "Holy shit, all I can think about is you wearing that little bikini with your belly and fucking gorgeous tits all over the place. Everyone is going to be looking at me next to you, knowing I got you like this." His hand rested on your bump, and he swallowed hard. "Knowing that's my baby."
"Seriously," you panted. "We need to get home now."
Bradley drove at a respectable speed and made you swear you would eat the dinner he made. Then when you got home, he checked your blood pressure and had you drink a glass of water. It was only at that point that he fucked you into the mattress, really rather lovingly, before he served you dinner.
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Next up is the babymoon of her dreams. Then Natasha is planning a baby shower that will probably be a nightmare. Then it's time for the Nugget to make her grand entrance! Thanks for reading! Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
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430 notes · View notes
supbbam · 3 years ago
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kinda crazy how dream just georgebur thruthed infront of us, like?? i did NOT see that coming
68 notes · View notes
mindninjax · 3 years ago
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Y’all think Mc Donald’s uses the same patties in both the double cheeseburger and the sausage mc muffin?
16 notes · View notes
marukyubi · 4 months ago
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OMG THE BABIESS AHHH They really are their guppies~<3 BAHAHHAH MIGUEL IN DUCK COSTUME💀💀 OMG third one already!? Hobie's quicker in here than R drowning that old bitch ass OMG THE BABIESSSS I'm melting in their cutenesss!!! Why is Hobie has to be that caring and it's making me cryyyy Poor R (and Hobie) Pregnancy and Childbirth is no joke one of the most traumatizing natural event one could witness
KATY AGAIN, CONGRATULATIONS, HONESTLY I FEEL LIKE A PROUD LITTLE SISTER 🥳🤭💕💕 , YOU'VE COME SO FAR, I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT! I just wished I'd met you sooner, then I could call myself an og 💪 *sigh*
Feel free to ignore my rec if you have no inspiration, or there are other recs that need tending to 🥺
Can I get a ❣️ shaped bottle full to the brim of epsom salt and Baby's breath, please! - a short fluffy drabble consisting of the twins helping their father out during his day to day tasks on the ship
Thank you ml ❤���❤️ you're an honorary og in my heart 🩷
Pairing: Pirate! Hobie Brown x fem! Reader
Word count: 3k
Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw pregnancy talk, cw food mentions, dad! Hobie, mom! Reader, an au of my BDAS series, Billie and Ramona AU, Twins AU. Fluff!
Katy's one year celebration 🎉
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“Wake up, guppies.” Hobie whispers, hands placed on Billie and Mona's shoulders, rocking them awake. It's easier when they prefer to sleep on the same bed even though they have their own right next to each other. He traces each of their noses, and they wiggle it in their half sleep state. “Thought you two wanted to help the captain today?”
Ramona is the first one to wake up, yawning, similar grey eyes cracking open. “Hi, dad.” She gives him a soft smile that Hobie reciprocates.
“Hello, guppy.” He gently rubs away sand from her sleepy eyes. “Good dream?”
“Yes, it was the mermaid dream again.” She whispers, ever so polite. “Bee and I were reading under the water while you and mum were making us hot chocolate.”
Hobie tilts his head with endearment. “How could you read underwater when the books would get wet?”
Her eyes shine, “mermaid magic.”
“I wouldn't have thought that, lovie.” She giggles, stretching on the mattress. Her hand smacks Billie to wake, groaning and frowning while she stirs.
Hobie senses an early tantrum. “G’morning, shark.”
She smiles at the ‘menacing’ nickname. Crisis averted. “Morning, daddy.” Turning towards Mona, she flicks her bicep. “You hit me.”
“Sorry, mon.”
Again, Hobie senses a fight. He's getting good at this. “What did you dream ‘bout, guppy?” He tucks away curls that have fallen in front of her face. That seemed to soften the twins away from fighting.
“I dreamed that grandad Miguel visited us on the ship and he was wearing a duck costume.”
“A duck costume?” Hobie and Mona ask at the same time.
Billie giggles with a shrug, “maybe he likes ducks.”
Hobie chuckles, too loudly. He quickly twists around to check on you. Thankfully, you still lay asleep, drooling on the pillow. Satisfied, he returns his attention towards his girls. “You two know the drill. Get dressed, brush your teeth—”
“And eat breakfast, then help the crew and captain dad.” They finish his sentence for him with a grin, twin telepathy working its magic.
He gives them a proud smile, patting each of their cheeks. “That's my girls.”
All three of them sit and eat outside with the ever rambunctious crew. Loaves of bread are being tossed around as people ask for them, jams are passed to and fro while Billie and Mona happily chatter with Yuri and Ned. Hobie smiles as the sun shines down on the long table, everything seems perfect with only Gwen, Miles, Pavitr and a handful of the crew with them are away on the second ship. The twins miss them dearly but after a few restless nights of them bawling their eyes out, they're counting down the days until they return back on the main ship.
The only person who isn't miles away but is very much missed on the breakfast table is you. Hobie resists the urge to wake you up, to pepper your face with saccharine kisses until you wake. But you need the sleep, especially that you're carrying the youngest crew member in your growing belly.
After breakfast, Billie and Mona help take down the dishes to the galley where Finn waits for each plate and utensil with a mountain of patience since the tiny crew members could only carry two plates at a time with some help from James. And James distracts them a lot with his stories. One time, Finn has been waiting for the next batch of dishes to be brought down, only to find the trio sitting on the stairs while James turns into their personal storyteller. Thankfully this time though, the only hang up is that Billie and Mona have small legs that don't cover much ground. With the combined help of James and Hobie (even though he needed to talk to Yuri) helped with the dishes.
Next on the agenda is a meeting with his navigator and a few of the crew members inside the captain's office. The twins seem to hate this only thing on the schedule. They sit and wait, and wait some more. With boredom etched on their faces, Ned had a brilliant idea to place a blanket down over a free table where the girls could hang out with their books, toys and drawing notebooks that Miles gifted them. Their giggles and own meeting about which biscuit is the best can be heard under the table while Hobie talks about strategy, he couldn't help but smile the entire meeting. Now it's their favourite part of the day until they see you awake that is.
Hobie brought them back on the deck with the sole purpose of teaching them how to tie knots. Or rather, they begged him to teach them. His calloused hands tie a simple ribbon around a bannister using a silk ribbon instead of the usual rough rope so that their hands wouldn't be irritated by it. His mind wanders back to the day that he first taught you how to properly secure a knot, it seems like forever ago now. But it's not so much a distant memory for him everytime he looks at you, and traces the scars on your palms— it's as if it happened just yesterday.
Waking up from his thoughts of you, he turns around to check on their progress. “Let's see what you've done then.” He's greeted by Mona's curly hair tied around the silky ribbon while Billie's curls are almost identical to hers. All tied around a cute ribbon. Though the pigtails are a bit wonky, they look absolutely adorable. He wishes that Miles could draw the moment so that he could show you later.
“Did we do good?” Mona smiles hopefully, Billie gives her dad the biggest, most adorable grin that could rival the brightness of the sun. Upon seeing this, Mona does the same, even making her eyelashes flutter. A trick that she must've gotten from you.
Hobie crouches down to their height, hands running along their hair and checking the neat ribbons. Surprisingly, they're pretty good at it. Wait till you hear your daughters are better at tying ribbons than you.
He exhales to compose himself from all the cuteness lest he scoops them up in his arms and scream into the sea, telling neptune himself at how adorable his children are.
“Brilliant, you're both brilliant.” They giggle, puffing their chests proudly.
Lo and behold, Hobie still scoops them up in his arms, giving them a squeeze. Both girls shriek happily, legs kicking about as Hobie rises to his full height. He has an idea, which might make Ned pop a blood vessel.
“How about we steer the ship?” Their eyes widened, excited screeching echoing around the deck as they nod furiously.
You wake up to the quiet lull of the sea. Waves lapping at the great ship, wood creaking, and blankets falling off your body when a tall wave meets the side of the ship. Water splashes against the porthole, stirring you awake further.
“—Bie?” Your throat scratches with sleep, eyes still heavy as you pat his side of the bed. “Hobie?” Finding it cold and empty, you prop yourself up by your elbows, sniffing at the cool air. “Billie? Mona?” Looking over your girls' toddler beds, you disappointedly find them both empty.
Their rooms aren't quite ready yet according to their standards, the walls aren't pink enough, and their desks aren't big enough. But you and Hobie think that they're still a little bit afraid of sleeping in their own room without the comforting presence of their mum and dad. You don't mind it at all, you also don't think you can sleep without their soft snores across the room. They are still your babies after all.
It's not unusual to find the captain's quarters devoid of your little family, not when both girls are starting to get used to their sea legs after spending the first three years of their life waddling around the shores of your shared home. They were beyond ecstatic when you and Hobie told them that it's the right time to go back to sailing the seas, something that you thought that they wouldn't even care about. But of course they would be excited, after all, their father is the greatest pirate to ever sail the seven seas (according to him and his girls.)
They're very much at home on the ship, so much so that they always wake up their ‘captain dad’ so they could help him with his morning routine even before breakfast is served. Hobie also loves being back, it's like he has never left the embrace of the tides.
Hobie has been a great sport the entire time, whenever the girls would cry about motion sickness or throwing tantrums when they want to climb up on the crow’s nest (because if aunt Yuri can do it, so can they!) he would be there helping you calm them down. Even though he hates waking up before the sun is barely peeking over the horizon, he loves it when he wakes up to his girls' smiling faces. There's nothing better than stirring awake with their little hands patting his face until they ultimately give up and use their feet to kick his legs. The girls would wake you up too but with you carrying the newest crew member in your bump, they're opting to just wake up their dad for now. Hobie has managed to convince the girls that you needed twice the amount of sleep because of the baby. Or managed to swindle them with hot chocolate in the morning, based on the fact that whenever you kiss each of them good morning, they always smell like the sweet drink.
You swing your legs at the end of the bed, socked feet padding along the room to grab your sweater, (or Hobie's old sweater for that matter) after changing and washing your face with the water basin, you head off towards the upper deck. Knowing that they're running along the floors trying to take the mop from James, who refuses to give up his job to a couple of four year olds. Walking along the corridors doesn't leave you winded just yet, you can still see your foot if you look down despite the bump. You have no idea if you can traverse the large ship once you hit the stage of having a stomach as big as a watermelon instead of the coconut sized belly you're strutting around with.
Passing along the galley, you pause at the open doorway, seeing Finn make pie crusts has you wanting to stay and help out. And by help out, you mean taking a little nibble of fruit while he looks away. You still remember the days where you used to spend hours helping in the kitchen.
“Knock knock.” You greet him with a smile. “Have you seen a certain pair of twins with their dad running after them?”
Finn chuckles, blue eyes crinkling at the corners. His grey hair weaved around blonde strands has the twins calling him Santa, or when they're in a good mood (when they want a sweet treat) they call him grandpa Finn, that has the older pirate folding immediately and making whatever the girls want. Unsurprisingly enough, he answers back. “A pair of twins and a pirate walk into a bar, I think I've heard of that joke before.”
“Different joke, Finn.” You snort, eyeing the bowl of blueberries on the counter. Finn, being the perceptive chef on board, notices your hard stare at the fruit.
Without a word, he nudges the bowl towards you, and then he points up towards the deck, replying to your previous question.
“This is why you're my favourite crew member.” Latching onto the bowl, you take it with a smile. “Don't tell Yuri.” He makes a face, putting both flour coated hands up in surrender.
You leave with a grin and a bowl of blueberries. It's still a mystery to you on how Finn keeps them fresh even after weeks of buying them from the last coastal town you anchored in for supplies. You guess you'll never know.
Walking up the steps towards the deck, you're greeted by blinding light as you open the door with a creek. The sight alone would've had you melting if not for the fragile bowl in your hands. Hobie stands on the highest deck with Billie and Ramona in his arms. While both girls are ‘steering’ the ship with their small hands gripping on the wheel as if they're actually sailing the huge ship.
“Mornin’ gorgeous.” Yuri nudges your side, hands dipping inside the bowl to take a handful of fruit, sunlight dancing along her features. “Sleep well? Or did the little pirate keep you awake?”
With the mention of the baby, your hand instinctively pats the bump softly. “Nope, the baby barely kicked me last night. And Hobie helped by letting me sleep in.”
Yuri hums, smiling softly between you and the twins laughing in their dad's arms. “He better, or I'll be the one to kick Hobie where the sun doesn't shine so he doesn't experience fatherhood ever again.”
You laugh, “that is bleak, Yuri.”
She shrugs, “I'm a pirate, Y/N, a pirate who hasn't shot her gun at a navy in months.”
“Sure, big bad pirate, who has made my girls' clothes ever since they were born.” She huffs with a teasing smile, taking another handful of berries. “Don't worry, once Gwen and the others get back from their scouting mission, you get to be a big bad pirate again.”
“I'm turning soft, doc.” She looks at you with puppy dog eyes, lashes fluttering teasingly.
“I know, Yuri, you made my girls puppets last week.”
“And they were fucking gorgeous.”
You start to walk away before she takes half of your stash. “They were! If you get tired of being a pirate, maybe being a puppet maker is your calling.”
She flips you off, grinning from ear to ear before going below deck to maybe annoy Finn instead. Bounding up the steps, Hobie and the twins heard you before they saw you.
“Mummy!” They simultaneously call out, wiggling out of Hobie's arms. He lets them gently back down on the floor, to which they immediately latch onto your legs, trying to climb up.
“Hello, my darlings!” You coo, patting both their heads. Their matching captain tricorns make you giggle. “What have you two been up to?”
“A lot!” Billie jumps up and down to reach your hip, you meet her halfway by crouching down to their level. “We fixed the sail with uncle Ned—”
“We helped auntie Yuri find land by looking into her te-escope!”
You nod enthusiastically, smile blindingly bright as you hold on to them. “What else? You two looked busy with dad.”
Hobie leans on the wheel that's still not activated with the help of a rope tied around the bottom and the other end wrapped around the bannister. The girls are none the wiser. The sun bathes Hobie in glorious light, rays of light seeping through his linen shirt, looking as if no time has passed.
“I should be careful, they're goin' to take my job as captain if they continue their trainin’”
You gasp, feigning hurt. “You mean they're planning a mutiny?! No, not my own girls!”
“What's a mu-tiny?” Billie questions, brows furrowed, an identical look that her sister is also sporting.
Hobie closes the small distance, boots thumping along the floorboards, looking softly at his girls while his hands find their way on their heads. “Tell you what, help uncle James clean the poop deck and I'll tell you.”
“Aye, aye, captain dad!” They say at the same time, even saluting Hobie. Before they could run off, you call them back.
“Take the blueberries, share them with each other, alright? Pass it around to the crew too.” You hand the bowl to them, both girls give you a grin and a smooch to each of your cheeks as thank you. Sometimes you wonder how they could be this sweet, you've joked once that they're a gift from the sea with how kind they could be. “Careful! Don't run— and they're already running off.” Their small feet bound away towards an unassuming James.
“They got that from you.” Hobie helps you up, hand warm against yours. “Always runnin’ off, always so bloody energetic.”
You prop your chin on his shoulder, smiling at him. “Did they tire you out, old man?”
“We're the same age, love.” His hand wraps behind you to cup your hip, fingers tapping along your stomach. He watches as his girls prefer to sit down on the stairs to munch on their snacks. “How's our growing pirate?”
“Good, he didn't kick me all night this time.”
“You?” Hobie leans on the bannister, back pressed on the wood while he guides you in front of him, arms around you, thumbs brushing along your spine while you cradle his jaw in your hands.
“I'm okay, Hobs, nothing of note.”
“You sure? We can still turn around so you can give birth on land.” Worry etches on his face, and you rub your hand on his forehead to flatten the worry lines.
“You forget that I was born at sea, and I've given birth to your pirate gremlins without a problem. I can handle it, don't worry.”
Hobie has a glimpse of you back then, legs coated in crimson, screams echoing around the small cabin that even silences the roar of the sea next door. “Just say the word and we'll find the nearest land, yeah?”
“I promise,” he raises a brow and you roll your eyes. “You know I never break a promise, Cap'n.”
Hobie opens his mouth to quip back, but James’ screech makes you and the pirate in your arms to look. Billie giggles as she runs away with a mop, tracking water droplets on the deck while Mona drags James down with her clinging to his leg with a laugh.
“I think we should save James before he falls overboard. Again.” You unwrap yourself from Hobie, before you could leave his side fully, he gently tugs you back in for a quick but affectionate kiss and a loving pat on your belly.
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metallic-sevenfold · 4 years ago
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(Pls im crying and cringing at the same time why tf did i make this😭😭)
Roni: *peaks over at his desk* S-Sooo, what have you made to-today, Fenton?
Fenton: Oh! I’ve made the most playable invention but seems so dangerous in your perspective! *shows it off* I call this a fidget spinner!!
Roni: *doesn’t respond but just laughs in returns* BAHAHHAH-!!
Fenton: W-What’s so funny?! (His mind: You’ve got to be kidding me with this women!)
Roni: I-I’m so sorry for laughing! B-but that toy looks so cute for a k-kiddo to play with!!
Fenton: *blushes of embarrassment* T-Toy?! *stutters and chuckles afterwards* (His mind: Great! Now my face is heating up!!)
Webby: TAKE THE PICTURE NOW!!
Huey: *trying his best to take the pic* I’M TRYING-!!!
(After that whole yelling and stuff, Huey and Webby finally got it and was tearing up for once in a lifetime that it was such a perfect picture :’D)
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doozer-reporting-for-duty · 3 years ago
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BAHAHHAH STEFAN'S FACE WHEN ELENA TELLS HIM THAT SHE KISSED DAMON IS LIKE "BITCH WHY TF ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS NOW?? I ALMOST FUCKING DIED"
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