#Ayesha Siddiqi

[jecliwanag]

Be the person you needed when you were younger.

[oddishfeeling]

do you have any book recommendations? pls i need lots 💙💙

this is such a loaded question friend. but lucky for u, i am procrastinating assignments, my take out has yet to arrive, and i just finished another book!

horror fic has been my choice for the last several books

the centre by ayesha manazir siddiqi is about a young Pakistani woman living in the UK. she's a translator for Urduru films. language and translation are central to this book. people are becoming fluent in a matter of weeks in complex languages.... the centre is gorgeous if not entirely mysterious, magical even. but whats the catch?? beautifully written. vivid details. anisa is a flawed, honest, and genuine feeling mc, as are the people in her life. i just finished it a couple hours ago n i miss my girls.

slewfoot by brom is set in 17th century Connecticut. our protag, Abitha, is not from this town but she does he best to adhere to the Puritan standards, if not for her well being, than that of her husband's. something stirs in the outskirts of the village, in the forest and beyond. she finds help from an unlikely source while also fostering a deep inner power of her own. these characters felt so well thought out, the writing is magnetic and the action is well paced. it puts so many preconceived notions right on their head. i loved this book and can't wait to read brom's other novel, the child thief, a retelling of peter pan and the lost boys!

sister, maiden, monster by lucy a. synder was oh so gay and oh so cosmically horrendous. this is like h.p. lovecraft wasn't a weird racist. this is like if biblically accurate angels were once just women in love. this is horrifying, visceral, and relevant to our COVID world. i was gawking at so many of the details. there are so many monster themes actually, it's perfect. the story is told through 3 povs of 3 different women. and we love women! and horror! i didn't expect to pick this one up but I'm so glad i did.

mary: an awakening of terror by nat cassidy do u know what it's like to be virtually invisible? forgotten? disaffected? do u know the pure joy of having a precious collection, adding to it over time, and it being almost ur only reason for living anymore?? then you're a lot like mary. and mary is a lot like plenty of women who get the chance to live beyond adolescence, who are cast out by society-- deemed invaluable. mary is utterly lost at a time in her life she feels she should have it all figured out. she goes back to her hometown, an ambiguous small town in the middle of the desert, and some unlikely characters help her piece things back together. i finished this book feeling so close to mary. we are friends now. there is mystique, horror, fables, myths, bad guys, mysterious architecture, and well mary is not the most reliable narrator. loved this one too.

the last house on needless street by catriona ward i had no idea where this book was going and i loved piecing the narrative together through several characters and their povs. it forces u to confront ur own biases regarding mental health. u are sympathetic to the characters in the most painful, heart wrenching ways. there is murder. there is mystery. there is missing children. there are cats. this book surprised me and it was fun to have to find a couple reddit threads to be sure i was understanding the story correctly. i felt like i read this kind of fast! which is always fun too.

brother by ania ahlborn this one pissed me off a bit. but in a good way because i was so deeply invested. this one is set in Appalachia. i'm not one for stereotypes, especially bc i think Appalachians have a bad rep and it's of no fault of their own. that being said, the insular feel of the book and the absolute claustrophobia those mountains create in this story were like a character in it of itself. our protag, michael, knows there's something beyond. he's seen them on colorful postcards. but his own mind and his own heart seem utterly trapped here. this one is heartbreaking. it's horrifying. and it'll make u dizzy from the amount of times u change ur mind. excited to read her other novel, Seed, because this one stuck with me so much!

a couple honorable mentions that fit the theme:

the vegetarian by han kang korean food. infidelity. art. nightmares. inexplicable mindfucks! this story was scary because it felt very.. possible? no monsters this time. no spells. just... the mind deteriorating. could happen to any of us.

a certain hunger by chelsea g. summers what if girlbossing is just a quick pivot from sociopathy?? what if the crimes are so much more gratifying than say, fame or fortune or even love?? women can be sociopaths too, you know!! this one is fun bc the protag is crazy and it's fun to slip into these characters. cathartic even. omg did i mention, she's a foodie too! just like me :-)

[iliketoread]

"All patriotism, in the end, is patriarchal and deadly."

Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi, The Centre

[archivalcryptid]

“Sometimes, it felt like I was cutting up my own tongue with a knife and fork before consuming it with that same tongue.” - The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi

[brigdh]

I used to write weekly reviews of what I was reading and post them to tumblr, but then I fell out of the habit. However, I did manage to finish some books last month, and maybe you will enjoy reading my thoughts?

The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi. A thriller set in modern-day London. Anisa, a Pakistani immigrant from a wealthy family, dreams of translating great works of literature, but is stuck doing the subtitles on Bollywood movies. Her white boyfriend Adam speaks eight languages fluently, perfectly, like he was born to them. At first Anisa is only jealous, but then she learns that Adam is hiding a connection to the Centre, a mysterious organization that promises to teach anyone any language in only two weeks – for a price. And, well, who wouldn't be tempted? But visiting the Centre is only the beginning of Anisa's uncovering a whole host of secrets, as she meets and grows close to the Indian woman of her own age who runs the place; she and Anisa fall instantly into a close friendship which reveals some of Anisa's own missing pieces.

Anisa is a fabulous character – sympathetic and self-centered, unreliable and occasionally awful, trying her best but so often (like most of us) just justifying her own lack of action. The writing is fantastic, compelling and funny and sad and precise. Right from the first page, I had trouble putting it down.

The mystery of how the Centre does what it does is obvious from fairly early on, but I didn't feel like that was a problem. The drive of The Centre isn't so much about answering the question of "how?" but that of "what now?" Knowledge (of a language or of anything else) is power, but access to power is complicated by race, gender, sexuality, class, age, and so many other factors, all of which come into play. Anisa – and the other characters, and readers ourselves – want to remake the world for the better, but can she do so by using the tools of the powerful? Or would the act of using their tools change her into just another copy of them? The Centre doesn't answer these questions (and to be fair, how on earth could a single novel do so?), but the way it raises them and the dilemma it poses to Anisa is just so good.

Hugely recommended, and I can't wait for Siddiqi's next book.

Gilded Needles by Michael McDowell. A historical thriller set in 1880s New York City, focused on the rivalry between two families: the Stallworths and the Shanks. The Stallworths are upper-class, respectable, and include a judge, a preacher, a would-be politician, and a fashionable hostess of ladies' committees. The Shanks are sordid criminals, and include a fence, a prostitute, an abortionist (which, you know, I don't have much of a problem with, except that she cares less about her patients actually surviving the procedure and more about getting paid), opium addicts, and lesbians. They come to one another's attention when the Stallworths decide to lead a 'clean up the slum' operation to boost their own political prominence, which unfortunately happens to focus on the Shanks's neighborhood and ultimately causes the death of three of the Shanks. Black Lena, matriarch of the Shanks family, seeks revenge, and vows to kill three of the Stallworths in return.

This novel is better categorized as a thriller than as horror, which is unfortunate because I wanted something scary to read for Halloween. But despite that, it's hugely compelling, a real race of devious motives and sinister plots and squalid historical detail. Not a single character in the book is remotely likable, and despite their outward differences, the Shanks and the Stallworths are united in finding the very concept of morality irrelevant and laughable. The Shanks come out ahead as slightly easier to root for because at least they seem to like one another, whereas the Stallworths hate one another as much as they hate the poor, the unpopular, and the pathetic. Gilded Needles is a bit like watching a reality show, where everyone is terrible but you still have a great time throwing back popcorn as they tear the competition to bits.

A ton of trashy fun in a historical setting? My very favorite kind of book.

[chanelslibrary]

🌙𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰🌙

The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi

⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

Anisa Ellahi’s day job is translating subtitles for Bollywood movies, but her dream job is translating great literary works! When her mediocre, British boyfriend Adam shows off his extensive knowledge of multiple languages, Anisa’s self worth hits an all time low. The final straw is when Adam learns to speak her native tongue, Urdu, fluently overnight, and she forces him to tell his secret. There is an elite, invite-only language program that guarantees fluency almost instantly. Anisa practically jumps at the offer to enroll. As she learns more about this mysterious but efficient program, Anisa discovers the cost might be too gruesome to stomach…

Wow this book! It has a great plot, and I loved that it had subtle gothic thriller vibes throughout. It was also nice to learn through Anisa about Pakistani culture, the dynamic of India and Pakistan and the history of the two countries (since I know very little I am ashamed to admit!), as well as life as a British Pakistani woman in England. The reason for my 3 star rating is although Anisa isn’t a very likeable character, she was relatable (everyone makes mistakes in friendships, relationships, their careers, etc.). But most of the other characters weren’t likeable either…and I feel like we need SOMEONE to root for lol. Also, at the end of a book I need some kind of conclusion. It was a very ambiguous ending which I wasn’t a fan of.

It’s a good book, and fans of Babel will like it. There is more of a focus on relationships/friendships v. translations/literary work than Babel.

[neonsbian]

im sorry this is kinda gay

[yoongivenn]

The Centre - Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi

The Centre was a book that had everything to be a perfect book for me, it’s about a Pakistani translator who is introduced to a language school that boasts fluency in just 10 days, but with a dark, sinister cost to pay. I do need to point out that the two different covers could not have been more different, and one of them (the mouth one) is completely horrendous, however, once you finish the…

[cameratosee]

The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi

[belle-keys]

Recommendations for media about translation, interpreting, and foreign languages

Movies and TV

Quo Vadis, Aida? (2020) The Interpreter (2005) The Last Stage (1948)

Books

Babel: An Arcane History by R.F. Kuang The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi Translating Myself and Others by Jhumpa Lahiri The Interpreter by Suki Kim Girl in Translation by Jean Kwok Translation Nation by Héctor Tobar Alphabet of Thorn by Patricia A. McKillip Translation State by Ann Leckie

Other Important Topics and Subjects

La Malinche The Rosetta Stone The Tower of Babel The Adamic Language Esperanto Philology Goethean World Literature

Documentaries and History

The Interpreters: A Historical Perspective The Nuremberg Trials Biblical Translation St. Jerome - patron saint of translators Shu-ilishu's Seal (first depiction of an interpreter)

[mendingbone]

i keep seeing people in their late teens/early twenties having a "[X] content intended for younger audiences does not feel satisfying to me anymore but i don't know where to start to branch out into adult fiction" moment and i thought i would give some recommendations for adult fiction for my fellow creepy crawly queer people. all or at least a LOT of it will be on the darker and more fucked up side bc i primarily engage with horror and thriller media personally but feel free to add on with more or recommendations from other genres :)

edit: i am continuing to add to this list so there might be new recs (highlighted in pink) in here every once in a while! also want to add that there's a variety of POC, queer, and disabled authors in here as well, i am also all of the above (asian, aro lesbian, poly, disabled) and tried to incorporate as many wickedly talented, compelling narratives as possible. that's all, happy reading!

A Certain Hunger, Chelsea G. Summers

A Darker Shade of Magic, V. E Schwab*

A Dowry of Blood, S.G Gibson

Animal, Lisa Taddeo*

A Ripple of Power and Promise, Jordan A. Day*

Bunny, Mona Awad*

Children of Blood and Bone, Tomi Adeyemi*

Cursed Bread, Sophie Mackintosh*

Dark Places, Gillian Flynn

Dead Girls Don't Say Sorry, Alex Ritany

Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead, Olga Tokarczuk*

Eileen, Ottessa Moshfegh*

Fruiting Bodies, Kathryn Harlan*

Goddess of Filth, V. Castro*

Gone Girl, Gillian Flynn

House of Leaves, Mark Danielewski

If I Had Your Face, Frances Cha*

Into the Drowning Deep, Mira Grant

Iron Widow, Xiran Jay Zhao

Jackal, Erin E. Adams*

Juniper and Thorn, Ava Reid*

Kindred, Octavia Butler*

Manhunt, Gretchen Felker-Martin*

Mexican Gothic, Silvia Moreno-Garcia

Ninefox Gambit, Yoon Ha Lee*

Rabbits, Terry Miles*

Scorched Grace, Margot Douaihy*

Sharp Objects, Gillian Flynn

She is a Haunting, Trang Thahn Tran

Slewfoot, Brom

Sorrowland, Rivers Soloman

Summer Sons, Lee Mandelo

Supper Club, Lara Williams*

The Centre, Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi*

The Change, Kirsten Miller

The Death of Jane Lawrence, Caitlin Starling*

The Dreamer Trilogy, Maggie Stiefvater

The Haunting of Hill House, Shirley Jackson

The Hollow Places, T. Kingfisher*

The Human Origins of Beatrice Porter, Soraya Palmer*

The Jasmine Throne, Tasha Suri

The Locked Tomb, Tamsyn Muir

The Luminous Dead, Caitlin Starling*

The Red Tree, Caitlin Kiernan*

The Unfamiliar Garden, Benjamin Percy*

Vicious, V. E Shwab

Wake, Siren, Nina MacLaughlin*

We Have Always Lived in the Castle, Shirley Jackson

What Moves the Dead, T. Kingfisher*

[clonerightsagenda]

#recently read November 23

The Golem of Brooklyn by Adam Mansbach. A stoned art teacher accidentally creates a golem who decides his mission is to stop an upcoming alt right rally.

The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle. Finally got around to this. A unicorn seeks the rest of her people and is forever changed by the mortal world.

How Can I Help You? by Laura Sims. A failed novelist working at a public library realizes her coworker was a killer nurse - and becomes fascinated with her as a topic for a new novel.

Last to Leave the Room by Caitlin Starling. While investigating why her city has started sinking, scientist Tamsin finds a new door in her basement - and then her doppelganger walks through it.

A Haunting in Hialeah Gardens by Raul Palma. Buried in debt, nonbeliever Hugo works as a babalawo. Then he's given a chance to clear his debts if he can end the very real haunting of his debt collector.

Before the Streetlights Come On: Black America's Urgent Call for Climate Solutions by Heather McTeer Toney. An environmental justice book discussing the climate crisis' disparate racial impacts.

The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi. Anisa is referred to a secretive language-learning program with miraculous results... and a sinister secret raising questions of translation, appropriation, and power.

The Best American Science Fiction and Fantasy 2023 ed. by R.F. Kuang.

[flamingkorybante]

Like many of my comrades I have been heartbroken by the nationalist fervor coming at me from all directions over the last week. I know it’s difficult for many diasporic Jews to imagine a praxis that integrates all of the ancestral trauma that we carry with the drive for peace and justice for all peoples to which we are commanded, and I want to offer as a possibility that tikkun olam will come when ALL borders fall and ALL states dissolve.

Rabbi Shmuel Alexandrov wrote that in olam haba’a, all borders and laws will dissolve before the light of the divinity present in all things – that even the border between Shabbat and the other days of the week would crumble, allowing the holiness of the Shabbat to infuse into every day (as Jill Hammer writes, this vision of sacredness infused into every day, every place, deconstructing artificial boundaries of space and time, “does not reject the Temple but rather enlarges it”). To divest from loyalty to the state and become instead a cosmopolitan – a citizen of the universe – “testif[ies] to the unity of the Creator and his creation – just as the former is one and undivided, so too the latter.”

“Every border implies the violence of its maintenance.” - Ayesha A. Siddiqi

There is no border between peoples, and consequently no state, that is not created and maintained through dehumanization. When we accept the existence of any state as good or even as a necessary evil, we are accepting the proposition that the people on the other side of the border are not people in the same way as we are, and that their suffering does not matter in the same way that our suffering matters.

It is only when we reject such a fantasy that we can rise together. We do not need the state to protect us from our cousins; we need to join with our cousins to protect each other from the state.

We are in a climate of unbearable propaganda; we are being thrown bodily into the memories of generations of screaming ancestors who yearn for sanctuary. This is being crafted intentionally by agents of states who need us to be too dissociated, too triggered, and too terrified to connect across difference so that they can get on with their work of exploitation and domination. Our only job right now is to resist that, to push through the dissociation and the fear and the trauma to reach out for each other, to dismantle the borders and walls and protections that the fear and trauma spring up around us, to remember that we are not each other’s enemy.

When we tear down the walls around our hearts, we are making ourselves into channels through which olam haba’a can be born, and when we tear down the walls in the world, letting the sacred peace of Shabbat rush in like undammed water, letting the artificial mechanisms of the state -- ANY state , all states -- be washed away by a river of solidarity, we are bringing it to pass.

[archivalcryptid]

I’m sure I’ll have more cohesive and interesting thoughts on The Centre when I finish it, but having Russian depicted as a cozy language rather than an aggressive one is so refreshing.

[slowdripsunrise]

oop okay i havent updated this in longer than i thought lol. spoilers under the cut !

finally read the starless sea by erin morgenstern ! good lord beautiful writing, beautiful imagery, and the stories nestled in between the main plot were so entertaining, just as much as the main storyline. characters were sweet, i wasn't in love with the romance subplot but like. the setting, the books, OUHG. that's really what i was focused on so if other aspects lacked. i dont care tbh. entertaining and fun and just overall gorgeous. not what i was expecting but a pleasant surprise.

next i read godkiller by hannah kaner, also a pleasant surprise ! the world was fun and the characters were interesting, and i'm curious to read the sequel !!! not much else to say about it tbh it was a fun fantasy read and also the audiobook slayed.

next i read the centre by ayesha manazir siddiqi and oml went into this knowing it was about language and well yes. but it's also about a failgirl and her questionable decisions and well i do like that. it's not my favorite but like yeah. yeah i get it. i think sometimes for me when i read books about women that just suck i find it a bit too relatable and start to hate the book like. i start thinking about my failures and problems instead of the characters and then im not interested in the book anymore. especially if the failgirl in question has money. its like well just shut up. sorry thats rude people with money can be sad but also like thats a book character so i dont care shut up. anyway this book was also about language so i liked it !! and cannibalism which was also fun. i loved the conversations about translation as consumption and translation as violence. i'm thinking about becoming a linguistics major at my local college so like. much to think about and digest (lol) i think topics like this are really interesting. overall a fun read !!!

after that i read a teeny tiny little short story the only harmless great thing by brooke bolander and GOD it was so good. like damn the pov changes between the elephants and the humans and like the nuclear waste warning and the elephant's stories and just uhg. ouhg. definitely recommend as like a sad bittersweet aching story

finally, i most recently read everyone in this room will someday be dead by emily austin and well. i'm writing this as a time killer so i don't look like i've just been crying when i go out to register my car LOL. like the beginning didn't quite hook me but im so glad i stuck through because i was absolutely sobbing by the end of it. like full on ugly crying. the characters were all lovely and real even tho some of them were bigoted like barney ... i hope he lives well even if hes super homophobic the author made me feel for every character. and the mc at first i didn't love her because i couldn't quite grasp her reasoning behind some of her decisions or her situation, but once i got further in i really started to see myself in her. which okay going back to the last book like i know i said i didn't like books that are just about failgirls well this one was different...... idk it just hit me the right way. the way she cared so much for every single living being around her made me care for them too, flop the bunny, mittens the cat, grace and rosemary, jeff, etc. like. pretty much every time she cried in the book i was also crying. which is like a lot. i also okay and i haven't examined this fully with myself but i really saw myself in her in regards to her depression and anxiety (i know these are not her only issues but these are just the ones i relate to specifically) and i can't help but reflect on how some of her choices, i probably also would have made if i wasn't were i am today, or if i wasn't medicated, or seeing a therapist, and that i've come pretty far from where i started. which feels really fucking nice. anyways i would recommend reading this if u like sad stories about sad girls that find themselves in The Situationstm. also if you've taken your anxiety meds. bc i forgot and my heart was pounding along with the mcs the entire time almost to the point where i had to put it down lol.

[ninzied]

tagged by: my love @redbelles

favorite color: dusty rose

last song: arson by hobi ♡

currently reading: hell bent by leigh bardugo, the centre by ayesha manazir siddiqi, stone blind by natalie haynes, the plague by camus

last movie: mission impossible - dead reckoning part one

sweet/spicy/savory: potatoes

currently working on: this is a sore subject

tagging: @152glasslippers @carry-the-sky @garglyswoof @heartonfirewrites @heidiamalia @myletternevercame @zushigirl