#Awesome is only starting to approach his own feelings but he's being very obvious - throwing a tantrum even lol

[sysig]

Just be honest! (Patreon)

Bonus:

Could be :)

[bl00dgutsgl0ry]

Yoyoyoyo I absolutely adore your blog and I'm so happy to see one more awesome genshin impact writer here :3 May I get a Childe coming home to snez'whateveritscalled' only to find his siblings surrounding his s/o who he thinks let him go without a goodbye? :D I meed lots of angst with a huge happy ending 🙏🏻💜😭

Pairing - Childe/Tartaglia x Reader

Warnings - Mentions of familial death, possible spoilers.

Other comments - Hello!! I am so glad that you are enjoying my writing!! (//▽//) I did have a little bit of trouble really understanding what you were asking for but I think I got it in the end I hope!! I can only hope that this lives up to what you were asking for! Again thank you so much for the request!! This also ended up being a lot longer than I originally thought, but halfway through I just got so in the zone.

      Childe was in a bad mood and everyone felt it. He had been summoned to go on another mission with the other Harbingers by the Tsaritsa and was expecting a goodbye from you. When he went to his place of residence though, you were absolutely no where to be found, with no note or anything said to his siblings about where you were going. To say the very least that was incredibly strange of you, but of course he had duties to attend to so he couldn’t try to look for you; so the best he could do was ask his siblings to relay the message to you and hope that you got back to him. 

      Now this of course soured his mood, not as much as getting a letter from his siblings stating that they were able to relay the message but still not hearing anything from you. For gods sake what has come of you?! No goodbye at all?! It is one thing to not be able to see you on the day he was leaving, but to not even try sending him a letter to explain yourself?!

      It was an understatement to say that Childe was pissed, there was a full blown fury raging inside of his head; though underneath all of this rage was concern. Had he done something to drive you away? Why had you disappeared from him without a trace? Did you regret being with him? He knew how dangerous it was to keep you around, and how frustrating it must’ve been for you to deal with his unruly work schedule of being a Harbinger, so it would make sense for you to try and leave. Now he wasn’t only mad at you, he was even angrier with himself. There must’ve been something he was doing wrong, why wouldn’t you have talked to him about it though. Was he really that unapproachable to you? Have you been lying to him when you said you loved him? 

      “Oi Childe what the hell has gotten into you?” Scaramouche was not one to inquire about the others personal lives, but this was getting really annoying and it was bothering everyone. 

      “Piss off Scaramouche.” Something flashed in Scaramouche’s eyes when he was spoken to with such disrespect. 

      “It’s Balladeer to you, fuckwit. Do not forget that even if you are a harbinger I am still superior to you.” In a flash Scaramouche was as in Childe’s face as he could, with of course a little trouble being shorter.

      “My apologies.” Childe sighed out through gritted teeth. At this point, Scaramouche had no more interest with holding conversation with the taller man, so he simply walked away for someone else to address. 

      Childe knew this was ridiculous, but he couldn’t get out of whatever funk he was in. It was starting to show to his ‘clients’ if you could even call them that. He was much more harsh when collecting debts and left almost no wiggle room for them to try and come up with such large amounts of Mora in the short amount of time he was giving them. 

      He wanted all of this to be over. He didn’t want to have to be in Liyue anymore, he didn’t want to have to keep scheming with the other Harbingers. He just wanted to see his siblings and you again; but in all honesty he doesn’t know what he would do if you had shown yourself to him right now. Would he reject you outright? Would he lose his carefully crafted temper? It was probably for the best that he wasn’t going back to Snezhnaya anytime soon.

      Unfortunately, it turned out that he was going to be back to Snezhnaya a lot sooner than he hoped, rage bottled up in him ready to pop like a fizzy drink shaken for hours on end. He knew it wasn’t a good idea for him to go back to his place of residence so soon; and there was a part of him that was hoping you wouldn’t be there when he got back. He knew it would hurt even more, but it was probably the safest thing for you; now of course his siblings wouldn’t let you get hurt and you had a vision too so you knew how to defend yourself but still he didn’t want to let it get to the point where any of that was necessary, you would for sure leave then.

      You on the other hand had just gotten back to Childe’s residence, and were surrounded by his siblings all asking you questions of your whereabouts; Teucer being especially nosy as ever. You always had a special relationship with the little boy, as he was the first to warm up to you. You didn’t hesitate to tell them where you were, and continued to apologize profusely for vanishing so suddenly. You also explained that you had tried to find time to write Tartaglia many times, but was never able to finish a letter. The siblings warned you of Tartaglia as they knew he was going to be upset when he came home, but you could only hope that he would let you explain.

      Soon enough, while you were surround by the siblings telling stories and giving out souvenirs from your trip, a loud door creaked open. You all knew who it was, as the sound of Tartaglia’s heavy footsteps were hard to miss, as well as seeing Teucer bolt from his seat to find his beloved older brother. Your blood ran cold when you made eye contact with Tartaglia, the air thick and uncomfortable. You slowly stood up taking a couple steps forward.

      “Um... Hello Tartaglia-” You immediately stopped in your tracks as you watched Tartaglia’s fists curl up into a ball.

      “Out.” You eyes widened in disbelief as you let of an uncomfortable laugh.

      “Don’t you want me to explain-” You were in complete and utter shock with how the copper haired man was acting.

      “Get out (y/n). Get out right now before I do something I might regret later. I leave for weeks and you don’t even have the decency to write me a goodbye? Just get out.” In the time span of this exchange, Teucer had made it back over to you and was now clinging to your hand. You looked down at him, then back at the other siblings giving them a small smile and mouthing the words ‘I will find a way to get you the rest of your souvenirs I promise’.

      You knew you had began to overstay your welcome when you saw Tartaglia’s fist tighten even more and begin to shake. Without another word and a quick ruffle of Teucer’s hair, you ran out past him, for the first time actually scared of him. You made it a point to not look him in the eyes as you ran past, scared of the look on the tall mans face.

      Was this really how your relationship with him was going to end? With a misunderstanding? For now you needed to find another place to stay so you didn’t freeze to death in the cold, so as of now Tartaglia was the least of your worries.

      “What were you all doing just now?” Tartaglia approached the quiet group.

      “(Y/n) had brought us souvenirs from her trip!” Teucer was the first to speak, quite oblivious to the obvious tension in the room.

      “Well throw them away.” This dark tone in Tartaglia’s voice made everyone uneasy. There were many loud protests including Teucer.

      “They are from her family! Her mother made them for us!” One of the older siblings voices, Tonia the older sister, rang through the now quiet room.

      “What?” (Y/n)’s family? They never talked about their family with Tartaglia before. That’s where their were? Had something happened to them?

      “Yeah! (Y/n) was saying how they had gotten a very urgent letter from their mother, stating that their father had fallen incredibly ill, and that he was likely not  going to last much longer. They left to visit with them and make sure that the funeral ran as smoothly as possible for their mother’s sake. In return their mother made all of these. You would have known that if you let them explain themselves. But of course you didn’t. This also explains why they weren’t able to write you. They have their own life to attend to Tartaglia.” Tonia’s voice was loud and harsh.

      “You of all people should understand what it is like to have a family member fall ill, you know the situation with father and all.” They were right, Tartaglia was being incredibly selfish. He didn’t even let you explain yourself, too wrapped up in his own feelings to even try and consider yours. God how could he have been so foolish. He knew you wouldn’t have just gotten up and left without a good reason, he was supposed to trust you! How could he have done this. Not only did he just send you out completely alone in the freezing cold, you father just passed away!

      “I’ll be right back I have to find them.” Tartaglia left as quickly as he arrived, already fearing the worst.

      You on the other hand weren’t fairing too much better. 

      “How did I just lose two of the most important people to me in the span of a couple weeks? He didn’t even let me explain myself! I just... I don’t know.” You were sitting in the neatly made bed, inside of the nearest Inn you could find. You couldn’t stop the hot tears from running down your already red face from the cold. Stifled sobs wracked through your body as you held the small Tartaglia doll your mother had knit for him. You shoved your face further into your fathers old scarf, trying desperately to stop the tears.

      It was deadly silent, besides the sound of your soft crying and sniffles when you heard a loud banging against your door. It sound frantic and urgent, which scared you as you pulled out your weapon, your vision coming to life. You slowly approached the door, rubbing the last of the tears off your face. When you looked through the small peephole through the door, standing in front was a panting and shivering Tartaglia, once again desperately pounding on your door.

      “(Y/n) please! Please answer the door! I know this is your room, I asked the Inn keeper!” You quickly stowed away the weapon and hid the small doll before cracking the door open. Even though you had stopped crying, it was still very evident with your puffy eyes and red face.

      Before you could open the door any further Tartaglia shoved his way in, immediately wrapping his arms around you in a vice like grip; scared that if he let go you would disappear. 

      “I’m sorry. I didn’t know, I should’ve let you explain I am so sorry. (Y/n) please forgive me. I just thought you didn’t enjoy being with me anymore and I got so scared that you had left with someone else. I know now that, that was indeed stupid of me to think. I trust you and I know you wouldn’t have done that I just-” You silenced him by shoving your head into his chest, beginning to cry once more. 

      “Please it’s my fault I should’ve found time to write you I was just so busy with the funeral and with mom I just..” Your words came out choppy as you tried to speak through quiet sobs. Tartaglia’s hands found your cheeks as he cupped them and forced you to look up.

      “Do not blame yourself my love. I know how hard having an ill parent is like.” Soft leather covered thumbs began wiping away tears, as you continued to cry.

      After a while, you finally were able to calm down and decided now would be a good time to show Tartaglia his gift.

      “My mother made you a gift too. She knits when she is stressed which is why all your siblings have knitted souvenirs like scarves or hats, she knows it gets cold here. I asked her to make something special for you though.” You extend a shaky hand with the small knitted doll to Tartaglia as he stared, eyes flicking from you, down to the doll, back to you, then down to the doll again. A wide bright smile finds his face, as tears begin to well up in his eyes; gently taking the doll from you.

      “It’s wonderful I must meet this woman, I have to thank her not only for this gift, but bringing the love of my life into the world.” A rosy blush dusts his face as he rubs his eyes, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, then your nose, then your lips.

      “Come now, we must give the rest of the gifts out. I apologize for interrupting. You must also resume your stories from your trip.”

[lazywonderlvnd]

*hesitantly steps in the box* Umm.. soo.. I was listening to Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift again and that song (is awesome btw if you haven't listened to it already) just gives me such MAJOR drarry vibes .. like -

" And I screamed, 'for whatever it's worth I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?' He looks up grinning like a devil. "

Like if that's not drarry I'd chomp my pillows. So .. *twiddling thumbs* could you pls write something with that line as a prompt?? Pretty please 🥺🥺🥺❤️❤️❤️ maybe use the song as inspiration.. idk? Whatever you like. ALSO, don't forget I STILL LOVE YOU that ain't changing yet and you haven't seen the last of me! Imma tail after you for eternity and you better take that as the threat it is! *throws love at you* BYE!! ❤️❤️ *vaults outside the box*

my sweetest most loved angel!! thank u so much for this prompt based on a BOP i was obsessed w when the album first came out. it got sm longer than it was meant to be, so it can be found on ao3 as well!! i hope u like it ilysm ❤️❤️❤️❤️

warnings for minor drug use (weed) and implied suicide of a minor character (lucius, extremely vague reference but pls be aware!)

rating: e word count: ~5k

When Pansy asked him how it started, Draco discovered that he didn’t know what to tell her.

Technically, though, it had started at Ernie Macmillan’s party in the beginning of summer, with the cloying scent of Freesias and Freedom Roses (“Imported from the States,” Ernie told Draco pompously, when he asked) and all those string-lights dangling from the cedar pergola, perennial balls of fire inside their clear bubbles like tiny trapped suns. Cheap beer in plastic cups, Marlboro cigarettes, and some stupid Muggle game ... darts.

Technically.  

* * * 

“Get off me, Potter,” Draco says in a failed whisper. He’s laughing and drunk and fuzzy warm under a sprawling summer’s night sky that looks like black paint. Potter tastes like Guinness every time he kisses him, and his hands are surprisingly soft. In direct opposition to his own command he pulls Potter in by the face and glues their mouths back together ravenously. The alcohol makes him sloppy (he likes it, though — the sloppiness of it) and Potter’s skin is warm where Draco slides his hand under an ugly Muggle band T-shirt to touch. 

Around the corner, he can hear music coming from the patio where nearly every single one of their former classmates are gathered, drinking and laughing and getting along famously with a much-needed buffer of five years between them and their Hogwarts days.

Much-needed for himself and Potter as well. Apparently.

He sees him sometimes, at get-togethers like this or around the Ministry, once or twice at a dinner party thrown by a mutual friend. They’re always cordial. He hasn’t insulted Potter to his face in five years.

Except for tonight, when he couldn’t help himself loudly drawing attention to the similarities between Potter’s hair and one of the shrubs in the garden. But they’re kissing now round the side of the house and because of that he’s quite glad for his slip. And it’s their five-year reunion, so. What would it be without some bickering between the two of them?

Potter presses him into the bricks and snogs him breathless, only he keeps grinning and laughing and ruining everything just when Draco starts losing himself in it.

“Quit laughing,” he scolds him. “You’re the worst, Potter. No etiquette at all.”

“That’s rude,” Potter says. His breath wafts across Draco’s mouth. His eyes are excessively green behind their round frames, which have not changed since their school days. The scar is mostly hidden beneath his wild fringe, save for the very bottom where it slashes neatly through a dark eyebrow and touches his eyelid. “I can’t help it, I’m pissed good and proper.”

His hand moves to Draco’s hip and even through the thickness of the alcohol coating his brain like a muffler he feels that touch clear and ripe as daybreak.

“So  that’s  why you’ve decided to snog me rather than …” He waves a hand vaguely, in lieu of the proper witticism with which he might normally have trounced Potter. “You know. Beat me to a pulp.”

“I only did that one time,” Potter says, grinning. Grinning and moving his thumb in circles on Draco’s hip. “And it was because you were being a twat. And I didn’t beat you to a pulp. You’re so dramatic.”

“Semantics,” Draco says. “I had a bloody nose.”

“And you deserved it.”

“Now who’s being rude?”

Potter kisses him again.

Guinness and Freesias.

* * * 

“Macmillan’s party,” he told Pansy. “He kissed me.”

“So that’s where you disappeared to.” She looked smug. Her inch-long nails were sharpened to a point and painted a glossy black, and she drummed them against her cheek, the way a cat flicks its tail. “I’m surprised you kept it from me this whole time.”

“Well,” said Draco, lowering his gaze to his glass of wine and watching it flirt dangerously with the lip as he swirled it. His cheeks felt warm, but he wasn’t embarrassed. “We snuck around.”

Right, maybe a little embarrassed. Mostly conflicted.

“Oh?” For a single syllable the laughter underneath was remarkably transparent.

He looked up, eyebrows lifted. “Yes,” he said a little defensively. “For obvious reasons. At first it was just sex. A lot of it, so he usually came here. Apparently Granger and the Weasel are notorious for popping round his place unexpectedly.”

* * *

He feels opened up all over again every time Potter fucks into him, unhurried and so careful. His hand is hot on Draco’s thigh, both of them sticky with sweat and come. This has to be their third round at least, and Draco’s sluggish brain insists it might actually be four.

An open window lets in the late afternoon air, humid and drowsy and perfumed heavily with flowers (a la Macmillan, Draco planted Freesias and Freedom Roses outside his bedroom window and helped them along to full bloom with some careful magic). Potter’s hair is damp with sweat — from exertion and the relentless heat of July — and Draco slides his fingers into it, tangles them and pulls the way he’s learned Potter likes. If he’s honest, he’s harboured a very secret and  very  desperate yearning to touch Potter’s hair since he was quite young. He doesn’t know why.

Well, maybe he knows why.

Potter makes a quiet, whimpered noise that curls Draco’s toes. He speeds up his hips, closing in on his orgasm and putting his face in Draco’s neck even though it’s too fucking hot for it.

“Fuck,” Draco whines. He tries to lift his leg higher, wrap it around Potter’s waist to get that perfect angle, but they’re too slick with sweat and he lets out a frustrated noise when it falls back to the bed. “Potter,” he says helplessly, arching into each thrust and shaking with the effort. This third (fourth?) orgasm is building too slowly, sitting there hard and stubborn and heavy in his gut and refusing to be coaxed to completion. He’s dripping with the effort, muscles quivering. “Please — I need —”

But he seems to have figured it out for himself. He scoots forward, lifting Draco’s arse higher off the bed and bending him nearly in half. The angle helps him go deeper and he’s suddenly nudging Draco’s oversensitive prostate every time he fucks back in.

“Right there,” Draco gasps, tensing as this new angle lights a fire under his elusive orgasm. His cock is leaking but he doesn’t have the strength or energy to get a hand around it. Potter’s grunting with the effort of fucking him, sweat dripping down his temples and making his neck and torso gleam. “Right there, god, right there, please, I’m so close —”

Potter braces himself and redoubles his efforts, and it’s like he’s reached inside Draco and sunk his claws into that building storm in his belly because suddenly it’s ripped right out of him in a colossal wave of euphoria that approaches too much, cock spurting untouched between them  .  Potter keeps moving inside him while he rides it out, and at some point he feels the warm, wet explosion of Potter emptying in him, mumbling incoherent things that include Draco’s name.

They come down together too. Draco is clutching Potter’s arms and trying to catch his breath and Potter is trembling and clutching him back like an anchor in a veritable ocean of sensation. 

It’s like this every time. 

When Potter drops down onto the bed beside him Draco rolls over and kisses him, long and deep and satisfying, and Potter reciprocates with the kind of intensity that is completely unique to him as a person.

“That one was particularly good,” says Potter, and Draco laughs.

When he feels like moving, he knows that Potter will get up and go to Draco’s kitchen and make tea for both of them, and he won’t need to ask what Draco likes, because he remembered after the first time. They’ll drink it naked in bed as the sun sets on another endless summer day and transforms before their eyes into a humid and pungent summer night, in the midst of which they will fuck at least three more times, and Potter will keep smelling like sweat and bergamot and boy, and Draco will keep feeling starved for him.

And they won’t talk about it.

* * *

“And?” Pansy said.

“And what?”

“You said ‘at first,’” she pointed out, and arched a groomed eyebrow. “When did it turn into more than just sex?”

Draco tamped down on a smile, because that would have been more emotion than he cared to show at the moment. To Pansy or to himself.

He swirled his wine again and took a long sip, stalling. He wanted — needed, really — to talk this out with her, but he was becoming aware of an uncomfortable heaviness in his chest which was suggesting to him that he didn’t want to share everything. Not because he was embarrassed, but, well … it was private. It was between him and Harry.

“There was this one night he came over later than he was supposed to because of work,” Draco said. The memory stirred some emotion. He hadn’t thought of it in a while. “He had this bloody huge takeout bag of Thai food.”

 * * *

He sets it down on Draco’s desk, takes out a container, and after toeing off his shoes drops sideways onto Draco’s bed with it and uses chopsticks to shovel in a mouthful of noodles. Draco watches this in awe.

“Want some?” Harry asks once he’s swallowed (small blessings). There’s grease around his mouth. “There’s a million other things in the bag but you have to get it yourself. I’m dead tired.”

Draco thinks of asking what the hell is going on, because they’re supposed to be fucking by now, but something stops him. Harry really does look exhausted but quite content eating his Thai food on Draco’s bed, and he doesn’t have the heart to berate him for it or remind him that they’re fuck buddies, not friends, and that if he’d wanted to eat and lounge about perhaps he should’ve stayed at home.

And the food really does smell good.

He gets up and fishes another container out of the bag that turns out to be some sort of heavenly-smelling marinated beef, which he brings back to the bed. Harry’s rolled onto his back and has the container of noodles balanced on his stomach.

“They thought they found a Horcrux on a raid,” he says. His voice is perfectly casual, but Draco thinks he can see something troubled in his eyes. He has one foot crossed over the other and  it’s bouncing anxiously; he doesn’t think Harry’s aware of doing it. “Wasn’t. Obviously.” 

“But they needed your expert advice to be sure.”

“Yeah.” Harry looks at him, then his food. “Is that the beef?”

“Yes it is.”

“Good?”

“Haven’t tried it yet.”

He opens the container and chooses a piece, but instead of lifting it to his mouth he follows some crazy impulse and hovers it over Harry’s instead.

“Open, Scarhead,” he says. Harry blinks but does it, and Draco drops it in. He smiles, then chews.

“Brilliant.”

* * *

“We ate it instead of fucking. It was the first time I realised something had shifted.”

“And you let it shift?”

The question gave him pause. He didn’t answer right away, mulling it over. It made it sound as if he’d had a choice, and that wasn’t quite right.

“It already had,” he said finally. “It wasn’t a matter of letting it; by the time I noticed, it had already happened. Otherwise he wouldn’t have come over with the food.”

“But you did let it continue,” said Pansy. She wasn’t antagonising him, nor accusing him of anything. She looked amused, but not in a way that was at his expense. Pansy was both a twat and a fiercely good friend, the combination of which meant she would do nothing more or less than hold up a mirror and force you to look at yourself, gruesome as the experience inevitably wound up being. “Even after you realised he had feelings for you.”

Draco swallowed. He’d not heard it said aloud before now.

“Yes,” he said. “It felt good. Knowing he fancied me.”

* * *

Harry’s shameless in his staring.

He stands in the doorway of the ensuite bathroom and watches Draco like he’s been invited to do so. Draco pretends not to notice, stretched out in a tub full of bubbles facing the opposite way. There’s incense burning, and candles. Harry is completely silent, but Draco could feel those eyes on him from across a crowded hall.

They fucked a few hours ago and fell asleep afterwards. Draco pretended not to think about it, but had actually made the conscious decision to let Harry continue sleeping when he woke up and decided he wanted a bath.

When he can’t take it anymore he opens his eyes and tilts his head back and a little to the side, just enough that he gets Potter in his peripherals.

“Well?” he says. 

“Well what?”

“Join me, won’t you?”

Harry snorts. Then there’s a quiver of magic in the air, and a small, utilitarian chair appears out of thin air beside the tub. Harry sits down in it. He’s holding the joint they’d only gotten halfway through earlier. 

He’s in his jeans and nothing else, all limbs and sparse chest hair, and when he crosses a leg over the other one, elbow resting on his knee as he hits the joint, Draco feels a bone-deep attraction to him that’s beyond physical.

“May I?” Draco asks. Harry hands it over and Draco inhales deeply before returning it. The humidity of the room mixes with the smoke and the smell of marijuana, pungent and cloying like the flowers. 

After a length of silence, Draco says, “Will you read me something?”

“Will I what?”

He takes his wand from the floor and Summons a book from the shelf in his room — one of his poetry collections comes sweeping in through the cracked door and into Harry’s lap. Harry sticks the joint between his lips and starts rifling through it with his glasses all fogged up. 

When he starts reading Byron (“I had a dream, which was not all a dream”) Draco smiles and sinks deeper into the hot water and bubbles, letting Harry’s voice lull him into a pleasant stupor. 

 * * *

“So you led him on,” said Pansy. “Because you liked his attention.”

He stared at her, then let his gaze drop to his wine again. Had he?

“It sounds bad when you say it like that.”

“Well,” she said, smiling wryly, “I’m only saying it as you’ve told it to me. Maybe if it sounds bad, it is bad. Some things are that simple, darling. Unless there’s more to it.”

“Like what?” he said, not looking at her. There was a touch of pouty defiance in his voice he knew Pansy would detect instantly. He heard her sigh.

“What exactly happened yesterday, Draco? You didn’t give me any context.”

“What context do you need?” he muttered. “He told me he loved me.”

* * *

They’ve finished an entire bottle of wine between them. He’s not drunk, but he’s pleasantly buzzed. Harry’s sprawled on his back, T-shirt rucked up just below his navel so Draco can see the dark trail of hair leading below his jeans. There’s something implicitly erotic about the movement of his chest when he breathes, his hands folded behind his head, one leg stretched the length of the bed and the other bent at the knee.

He opens his eyes suddenly and grins when he sees Draco looking at him. 

“That wine just made me tired,” he says.

“So go to sleep,” says Draco. He takes a last swig, emptying it, and sets the bottle aside on his night table. He stretches his arms over his head and arches his back, yawning widely, thinking perhaps he’ll give into the tempting allure of sleep as well when Harry says, “I told Hermione about us.”

So he’s not sleeping, then. His stomach clenches hard and a completely irrational sense of panic rises in his throat.

“Us?” he says slowly, sitting up straighter. “What ‘us’?”

Harry looks at him upside-down, then rolls over and rises to his knees. He stares at Draco blankly.

“‘What us?’” he repeats.

“Yes,” says Draco. “What ‘us’?”

“Us,” Harry says. His voice is lower than usual. The word is starting to sound weird and lose meaning. “You and me, Draco.”

“‘You and me?’ Harry, there’s no you and me. We’re just fucking. What do you … what do you mean, you told Granger? Told her what?”

Harry looks … well, he looks fucking crushed. And angry. Draco forces himself not to look away.

“I told her I’d been seeing you,” he says quietly. There’s something … not threatening, but close to it, in his voice.

“Sure,” says Draco. “I see you three times a week, sometimes four. I s’pose if you feel the need to fill Granger in on everything you do with every second of your day —”

“Shut up, Draco,” Harry says. “You know what I meant.”

Draco glares at him. He gets off the bed, slightly lightheaded from the wine, horrified by the emotions welling up inside him right behind the panic, and he points at his bedroom door.

“Get out,” he says. 

“Are you serious?”

“Go!” he says loudly, voice rising. “If you’re gonna start turning this into something it definitely is not then get out of my flat, Potter.” As usual the window is open, but it’s the third of September and getting chilly finally and Draco’s Freesias and Freedom Roses started wilting last week. There’s a chilly breeze coming into that room that is utterly barren of the sweet smells of summer he associates with Harry these days. “It’s time we ended this anyway,” he says. “Summer’s over.”

“So?” From his position kneeling on Draco’s bed Harry shouldn’t feel imposing at all, but he does. There’s no sparkle of humour in his eyes, none of the softness Draco’s gotten used to seeing there. He looks like someone who’s realised they’ve been betrayed.

Worse than that. Someone who’s been betrayed and realises they should have seen it coming.

“What the fuck does summer have to do with anything?”

“Ever heard of a summer fling, Potter? We’re not ‘seeing each other’.”

Harry finally gets off the bed. Draco’s stomach clenches again, more painfully this time. He doesn’t feel bad, he tells himself — this is Harry’s fault. His fault for making a big deal out of something easy and fun and, most of all, temporary. For ruining this with feelings. 

 “That’s not what this was,” Harry says. It’s not an argumentative tone; rather, he sounds disappointed. Devastated, and disappointed. And that look of betrayal, like he’s surprised but not …  that  surprised.

That hurts. 

“This was as real as it gets, Draco,” he says matter-of-factly. “You and I don’t have the capability of doing anything as shallow as a fling.”

“Well, Potter,” says Draco, straining to maintain his level voice, “congratulations, because that is the most disgusting, romanticised, Gryffindorian piece of shit I’ve ever heard.”

“Yeah?” He grabs up his wand from the bedside table and stuffs it into his jeans pocket. “Well here’s another: I love you. You complete fucking prick.”

Draco stares after him as he leaves the room, cowed for the moment. He hears Harry take the Floo powder off his mantle, hears the fire start, and then the sound of Potter disappearing. 

And he feels hollow suddenly.

* * *

“And he said it completely out of the blue?” 

Draco set his wine aside. He was suddenly feeling too sick to put anything else in his body.

“Sort of,” he said quietly, avoiding her eyes. “He was trying to make something out of nothing. He was just making a point, trying to guilt me, I don’t even think he meant it.”

Pansy said nothing for so long that Draco finally looked up. She had an eyebrow raised.

“Do you really believe that?” she said.

Draco didn’t answer right away. He glanced at the bottle of wine on the table and thought about the way it always tasted a little sweeter on Harry’s lips.

“I don’t know,” he said. “No. But it doesn’t change anything. It was a summer thing, not a … a relationship, for crying out loud. Like I’d date Potter.”

“Why not?”

Draco scoffed. “Why not? Pansy, please. He’s a …”

“A …?”

“He’s an idiot! He’s Potter!  He’s …” He couldn’t think of the right word, something bad enough to express the audacity, the gall , for Potter to think even for a second  that they could …

“Draco Malfoy,” said Pansy. She was smirking. “You love him too.”

Had he felt sick before?  Now he was going to be sick.

“I never would’ve imagined it,” she went on, seeming to take pleasure from his outrage and humiliation. The bint. “Look at you, you’re blushing! Oh my god,” she laughed. And then she stopped laughing, and instead the weight of her own words appeared to descend on her. “Oh my god. You do, don’t you? You are arse over tits for Harry Potter —”

He was up and out of his chair before she’d finished the last word, absurdly,  embarrassingly on the verge of tears all of a sudden. 

“Draco —”

“I’m glad this can serve as your entertainment for the week, Pansy,” he said. A tear rolled down his cheek — could he be any more histrionic? — and he brushed it away furiously. 

“Draco, no —”

“Call Blaise, tell him!” he shouted. “You two can have a good laugh over it —”

“Draco  —”

“Poor Draco’s  fucked himself over again, what a stupid wanker!” 

Pansy got up. He slapped her hand away when she reached for him, but she only came at him again and grabbed it this time when he swatted at her, enfolding it in both of hers. He closed his eyes and hiccoughed and two more tears came.

“Darling, will you please listen to me?” she said softly. It sounded eerily like his mother, which only made him feel young and childish. He tugged his arm away and she let him go, but he didn’t move any farther away. “I am  not  laughing at you,” she told him. “Blaise might, but that’s because Blaise has a black hole for a heart, Draco, the only emotion he’s ever felt is disdain.” Against his will, Draco chuckled wetly. Pansy smiled and took his hand again, tentatively. He allowed it. “ I think it’s lovely that you have feelings for him. I don’t understand what’s got you so upset, I mean … I know it’s Potter, but we’re not teenagers anymore, right? Who cares?”

Draco exhaled a long sigh.

“He let my father go to Azkaban,” he said softly, looking into her eyes. He saw comprehension dawning. “How can I be with someone who could’ve saved my father’s life and chose not to, Pansy?”

“No one could have saved your father, Draco,” said Pansy gravely. His throat was tight, swollen. He hated that he was hanging on her words, looking for truth in them,  wanting to hear something that would make this okay. “He would have done the same thing if they’d let him go back to the manor. It’s not your fault or your mum’s or Potter’s.”

“But —”

“But what?” she cut him off sharply. “Draco, please don’t let your father keep controlling your life from the grave! My god, you deserve happiness, don’t you see that? Even if it’s Potter! In fact, I … I think that could be really good.”

“What, being with Potter?”

“Yes, being with Potter,” she said. “Darling, I say this because I love you: you need to grow a pair of bollocks and start taking control of your own life. I’m not finished!” she added when he opened his mouth to retort. “I understand that it feels like a betrayal of your father, I do, and I’m not saying you can’t have your cherished memories of him, but Draco … you cannot live your life in his shadow, doing things because it’s what he’d want or wouldn’t want. I think that choosing to explore these feelings you have for Potter is the bravest and healthiest thing you could possibly do for yourself.”

He stared at her for a long moment, eyes wet though the tears had stopped falling. 

“What if it doesn’t last?” he said finally. “What if next week he realises it was a huge mistake?”

“First of all, I doubt that,” said Pansy with a roll of her eyes that was clearly meant to be teasing. “You said you’ve been seeing him all summer, that’s plenty of time to have gotten sick of you. And, even if that did happen, I still think it would be entirely worth that week of being disgustingly in love.”

“Do you?” he drawled.

“Yes! I do!” She picked up his discarded wine glass from before and held it up. “Does the effect of alcohol last forever?”

“No …”

“Of course not! And we don’t expect it to. We expect to have fun while we’re drunk and it’ll last as long as it lasts.”

“Dating someone isn’t like being drunk, Pansy,” Draco said sourly.

“Oh, that’s not the point ,” she huffed. “We don’t do things because we know they’ll last forever, we do them because we want to. In the moment.”

“Sounds irresponsible.”

“Well, of course it is,” she scoffed. “Love is completely irresponsible, that’s the fun of it, Draco. Now take this,” she shoved the glass of wine into his hand, almost spilling it. “Drink up, and then get your arse over to his flat and fix this.”

* * *

Granger opened the door. Draco sighed.

“Hello, Granger,” he said lamely. Her raised eyebrows said she was surprised and thoroughly unimpressed by his appearance.

“Malfoy,” she said.

“Is Potter in?”

“I guess that depends.”

“On?”

She looked at him, dark brown eyes impenetrable. Then she closed the front door behind her.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“To talk to him,” he said tightly. As if this whole thing wasn’t bad enough, now he had to pass a test to get past Granger the bridge troll. “I thought he told you —”

“He did,” she said flatly. “And about yesterday.”

“Well I’m here to apologise,” said Draco. Granger’s eyebrows lifted again. Still unimpressed. “And to tell him …” He sighed again and broke eye contact, willing himself not to give up, not to take this as a sign he should just go home and ream into Pansy for giving him such bad advice.

“Malfoy.” He looked up. Her voice was softer now, and her eyes seemed a little less hard. “What are you doing? You really hurt him, you know.”

“I know,” he said stiffly. “I said I’m here to apologise.”

“Well he doesn’t need an apology,” she said. “If you’re only going to let him down again —”

“I’m not.” He rubbed his forehead and looked at her again, exasperated, defeated. “I’ve … had some sense talked into me.”

She looked like it was the last thing she’d been expecting. 

“Have you?”

“Yes,” he said. “So would you please get him for me before I lose my nerve?”

It was the right thing to say. Her expression melted into something much softer and he fancied he even saw the beginnings of a smile.

“Can I ask who affected this change of heart?”

“Pansy,” he said. And, when Granger seemed taken aback, “She’s very wise when she feels like it.”

“I see. Well …” She still looked a bit conflicted, eyeing him and then putting her hand on the doorknob. “All right. I’ll tell him you’re here, anyway, but he was really hurt, Malfoy. I don’t know if he’ll want to hear it.”

“I’ll take my chances,” he said.

Granger eyed him another moment and then went back inside, shutting the door behind her. Draco only had to wait a minute before it was opening again, and this time Harry came out. The sight of him made Draco’s heart feel tender and sore.

“Hi,” he said.

“Hi, Potter.”

He waited to see if Harry would say anything else but he didn’t. He only stared at Draco expectantly, arms folded, in all ways closed off.

“I came to apologise,” said Draco.

“Well you can keep it,” said Harry. “I don’t need an apology because you told me the truth.”

“It wasn’t the truth, Potter,” Draco said quietly. “Opposite, really.”

Harry was silent. Then, “You made me feel like shit, Draco.”

“I know. I’m sorry. You freaked me out, springing it on me like that.”

A beat, then two, and then suddenly Harry was dropping his arms and sighing and he looked at Draco with so much vulnerability he nearly had to turn away from it.

“I didn’t mean to tell you …” He licked his lips, scratched his arm. It reminded Draco that beneath everything, Harry was still the same awkward dorky leader-of-the-losers he’d always been, just with a bit more confidence now and the title of Official Saviour of the Wizarding World. “I wouldn’t have said that if … I was just angry.”

He didn’t need to ask what Harry was referring to.

“I know.”

“Not that I didn’t … I mean, I … I do —”

“Please don’t say it again,” Draco said. Harry laughed.

“Right. I just meant … I really do have feelings for you, Draco. Like … mad, crazy feelings, y’know? I don’t want it to be a fling.”

“It wasn’t a fling,” he said. He moved a little closer and Harry watched him carefully, eyes flickering once down to Draco’s mouth. “I didn’t even sleep with anyone else the whole time.”

“Well that’s good to know,” said Harry sardonically. But he was smiling, so Draco found himself smiling tentatively as well.

“I wanna be with you, Potter. Properly. I thought …” But he shakes his head, deciding that now isn’t the time to explain about his father. “I thought it was a stupid idea. Now I realise that it probably is, but that I don’t really care much. I’ve decided to ignore my better judgment this one time.”

“That’s quite Gryffindor of you,” Harry commented drily.

“Yes, well.”

“So I go against your better judgment, then?”

“Potter,” Draco sighed. “Please, I don’t mean it like —”

“I’m taking the piss, Draco,” Harry cut him off. He reached for Draco’s waist and pulled him close, and before Draco could get his breath back from a short, surprised intake of breath Harry’s mouth was on his, warm and familiar and soothing. He brought his hands to Harry’s face and kissed back without bothering to hide his overwhelming relief.

Harry chased his mouth when he pulled away and Draco breathed out a laugh, holding him at bay with a hand on his chest. 

“We have plenty of time,” he said. “D’you wanna come over later tonight, after your friends leave?”

“What? No, come in.” He took Draco’s hand and gestured with his head towards the door. “Please. It’s just Ron and Hermione. They know everything.”

“Really?” Draco drawled. “And you think Weasley won’t try to kill me?”

“I promise not to let him,” Harry grinned. “Please, Draco. You said you wanted to do this properly, right?”

He thought of what Pansy said about being irresponsible, and decided it was worth a try at least.

“Okay,” he said. Harry beamed and tugged him inside.

Towards his ultimate downfall or towards the beginning of the rest of his life, he didn’t know. That, as Pansy would have said, was the fun of it.

[zeta-in-de-walls]

Hey guys, I was having thoughts on the meta-side of the Dream SMP. Okay, so we know that Technoblade has done much of the scripting for this present arc, Tommy, Dream and Quackity have also done some in collaboration, presumably doing each of their own characters and motivations, and Tubbo and Fundy have also been involved too. Uh, this will be rambly as it’s a lot of unsorted observations.

Obviously these are my thoughts, and ideas purely based on my observations as a viewer but you can definitely tell that they’re all very aware of the fanbase and are likely very influenced by them. I could see this even in the Pogtopia arc where Tommy started reusing phrases before when debating ethics with Wilbur, eg ‘let’s lose as winners, not win as losers.’ or something along those lines and how Techno made a callback to his only universal language is violence speech in his wither monologue. 

But wow, the scripting is definitely becoming a lot more obvious in this new season of the SMP. Not a bad thing at all, by the way, it’s just a difference. Clearly they’ve gotten more detailed plans and are more ambitious with what they convey in minecraft, with more players taking inspiration from Wilbur after how well he executed it. It’s also the difference in how the various people write, I’m sure. 

Tommy and Tubbo have streamed the SMP for the longest and have very gradually evolved into the roleplaying and their respective approaches to it are very interesting. Tubbo’s streams are typically chill and usually involve him working on some sort of project - he’s very chaotic when with other people but is usually very reactionary when it comes to the roleplaying - doing most of his best stuff when bouncing off Tommy, or occasionally Quackity. On his own he doesn’t like to lead bits but is among the best at making other people’s bits work. Same with the RP! His character’s in a weird spot right now as the other writer’s seem to be writing him in quite an unflattering way and he doesn’t do solo, emotional performances all that much meaning he’s less sympathetic right now then he really should be. Like, Tommy garnered loads of sympathy during his exile as he gave a very expressive performance where Tubbo’s character also presumably feels very isolated and alone and he’s being manipulated by the people around him but he gives a lot less. This has made it easier for the audience to start siding more with Technoblade, the literal mass-murderer, over the traumatised kid who was manipulated into exiling his best friend and continues to face terrible choices with no good options.

 While I can of course make less meta theories on why Tubbo should be appreciated more and what it says he’s got no real support and is compartmentalising his problems, in the end it’s how his streams work. Tubbo does plot related streams, and he does streams where he simply vibes - and even in the serious streams, he can joke around and cheerfully lampshade the goofiness by doing things like joking about wanting a good review from Techno while kidnapping him - that stuff is priceless and does not fit into the melodramtic scripts but it adds so much to the SMP and why it is so much fun to watch. Tubbo’s really good at making content better! He’s not afraid to look ridiculous, he will also unapologetically avoid engaging in too much melodrama himself when he doesn’t feel like it. I consider his character highly underrated in the plot right now.

Tommy knows what he’s doing. Even before the roleplaying really took off, Tommy liked to play a character and lead bits and the SMP shifting in a more scripted direction suited him exceptionally well. Tommy focuses heavily on streams with lots of content, only rarely doing more chill stuff - especially more recently. He has always approached streams with a plan - but usually their extremely loose and he has said that he’d sometimes just come up with an idea 10 minutes before the stream and improvise from there. Tommy’s good at improvising and seems to work best with a very loose plan. Where I think Techno likely came up with the plan for Tommy to get exiled from L’Manburg and then join forces with him, Tommy likely filled in how to play his character and - wow.

Tommy’s writing seems to be incredibly simple - each exile stream had no major plot points or anything and the plans that are there don’t even make logical sense (let’s throw a party in one day and let’s invite everyone but have Dream not send out the invitations so no one shows up - and I’m going to do this even with Philza and Fundy literally in the call.) but Tommy pulled every one of them off very well and proved to be compelling enough that no one cared at all whether the plot made sense nor did Tommy make much effort to justify that sort of thing - ‘cause he knows how the SMP works and how much the audience will go along with it. And instead, Tommy focused entirely on his characterisation and spent all his time exploring it. That’s how Tommy works - very simple plans, then improv in character into an engaging bit. He’s managed to pull off the most ridiculous things like that, and has confidence that the other streamers will support it - that’s how he’s prepared to try insane things like pretending to be Clarencio the llama. And, like Tubbo, he’s always willing to throw for content. 

Then there’s Technoblade. He’s streamed the SMP a lot less - though he’s done so much more recently - but he’s spent a lot more time playing on the SMP, doing tons of grinding. He here for the RP but is also committed to playing the game itself very optimally. He seems to have a much larger view, taking in the bigger picture, of the story where Tommy has a very personal view. His approach to content is all about the fanservice. 

He’s always trying to create big epic, moments, that both look and sound awesome. Like the butcher’s army plotline which let him both seem like an underdog, a victim against a mean group, and also an incredible badass figure who outplayed them all and came out as victorious. The butcher’s army were really given an antagonists role there, and were really made to seem unlikeable. Then he met up with fan-favourite Tommy and suggested a team-up with him. (This is also leading to the ultimate fanservice that is the Sleepybois team-up.) Techno’s got a very, dry self-aware sens of humour too and he’ll often make simple meta observations about the SMP - like noting that the pacing’s fast or teasing in the chat in the middle of wars. He’s also made himself into a bit of a meme what with logging just to say his name and leave. 

I don’t know how much it’s just Techno of course, but the plot really seems to be heading in a direction that suggesting that Technoblade was Right. L’Manburg’s seeming corrupt, and Tommy is being seen as Theseus. At the time Techno first made the Theseus speech, I felt like the comparison seemed unfair - but now it’s like the plot itself has bent over to make the comparison make sense, and Techno’s one of the writers of the script. Techno also of course, prepared a vault to show Tommy so he could say ‘welcome home Theseus dramatically - total fanservice as fans were indeed talking about how cool saying a line would be, and then he absolutely did. The way Techno calls his viewers chatting as the voices in his head is also fanservice. It’s not like actually true, as Techno ignores the chat if they tell him information his character doesn’t know and meanwhile all the streamers interact with their chat too - so all chats have always been a part of the story and calling them canon is absolutely meaningless. Not a bad thing though - it is nice and makes the fans happy and makes them feel included. I don’t know if this sounds critical by the way - it’s not meant as such at all - all the streamers love engaging with the fandom, and Techno’s approach to giving lots of fanservice by providing so many epic moments is great. I just wanted to highlight it. 

And those were some meta thoughts on the SMP right now and its writing. I don’t really think I had a point or argument. I just wanting to make some observations and my impressions. If you’re curious I am course a Tommy fan first. I love how he’s evolved with the SMP most of all and I appreciate his character-driven storytelling. His main weakness is probably getting too into bits and going too far and it’s so nice that the SMP is a place where even his weaker ideas are supported rather than shut down. I like how he’s able to improv so well and simply how he streams. Perhaps unsurprisingly, I love Tubbo best when he’s with Tommy as they bring the best performances out of each other. I find Techno interesting as a contrast to both of them, as he approaches so many things in such a different way. 

[x0401x]

Given Movie: Anime Eiga Interview

The adult trio of “Given”, Nakazawa Masatomo, Eguchi Takuya and Asanuma Shintarou – finding out about each other’s appeal through proffering a deep love.

The sequel to the TV series that adapted Ms. Kizu Natsuki’s popular BL manga into an anime came in the form of “Given the Movie” and made its appearance in the big screen. Along with sensible expressions of emotion, this series depicts the circumstances of youthful love connected by music, capturing the hearts of the viewers. The movie portrays the “bitter and passionate love” between the band’s “adult members”, Haruki and Akihiko, as well as Akihiko and his ex-boyfriend, the genius violinist Murata Ugetsu, whom he continues to live with even after breaking up. Hence, this time, we have hit up Nakazawa Masatomo, the voice of Haruki, Eguchi Takuya, the voice of Kaji Akihiko, and Asanuma Shintarou, the voice of Ugetsu. What kind of appeal did they sense from one another after co-acting in roles where they had to proffer intense love? We had each of them discuss their thoughts.

Discovering the charm of the characters anew in a movie where the feelings of each accelerate.

——The movie is about the romance between Haruki, Akihiko and Ugetsu. The thoughts that they had been concealing are exposed, so what were your impressions when you read the script?

Nakazawa: In the TV series, Haruki, the character I play, was thinking about “wanting the band to do well” and “what he should do for the band’s sake”, being a “sideline support” for Mafuyu and Ritsuka, together with Akihiko. Haruki and Akihiko are said to be part of the “adult group”, but the two of them have their own ways of thinking - Akihiko is the type that aims for good things by taking action using a detonator. On the other hand, Haruki is always calmly concerning himself with everyone, so that they can do things freely. Both of them listened to Mafuyu’s singing voice, were influenced by it and suffered changes, so I felt from the script that I could get a glimpse at these changes. Regarding Haruki, he started feeling his own loneliness more strongly, and while watching Mafuyu display his musical talent more and more, he also had a complex about being just an ordinary person who liked music a little bit. I felt like we were able to see what Haruki was carrying under the surface.

——Were there any points where you felt the appeal of Haruki and Akihiko all over again?

Nakazawa: There were. Haruki never tells Akihiko that he likes him and does his best to hide it. It’s totally obvious, though... (laughs). Through Haruki, I felt that there are things you convey not with words but with feelings, and on the other hand, there are things that can finally be conveyed when you put them into words.

——Eguchi-san plays the role of Akihiko. Please tell us your impressions of the script.

Eguchi: I had read the original work, so I was looking forward to seeing the hearts of everyone from the “adult group” being moved and them putting an end to things. When I read the script, this is quite obvious, but I had many lines (laughs). Akihiko shows in it a part of himself that he never had until then, so destroying something like a sculpture of Akihiko that the TV series had warmed up was necessary work. Moreover, it was the kind of scrip that allowed for all kinds of fun, such as how long the monologues and narrations should be, so I felt a strong sense of compensation from it. During the recordings, I first tried throwing in what I had come up with. The team makes you want to create something together with them, so I felt like making up my mind and challenging myself. I was very happy to be able to take on the challenge.

——When you threw it in, were you able to see a new side to Akihiko’s appeal?

Eguchi: “So he was THAT compassionate?!” was what I thought. Akihiko is always cool, so I wondered when his emotions would take a swing, but I think this was a sign that he was afraid of “changing the present”. In the movie, I had to carry out the job of Akihiko properly facing all sorts of things and doing a retake on his true feelings. He gave off more of an adult impression until that point, so I think I got to see a more realistic, young part of him.

——Asanuma-san plays the role of Ugetsu, who continues living with Akihiko after breaking up.

Asanuma: There were few episodes in the TV series where Ugetsu showed up, but even in them, there are crucial scenes in which you can get a glimpse that “Ugetsu is this kind of person”. It’s exactly because he is a genius that he acts indifferent about anything other than music, gets fawned on in a genius-like way that makes people think, “If he says so, then there’s no helping it”, and has great interest in people like Mafuyu, whom he feels sympathy for. There’s a scene in the movie where Ugetsu and Mafuyu meet for the first time, and when I read the script, I felt that “Ugetsu approached Mafuyu with honest feelings”. It’s because he has sympathy for Mafuyu that he ends up telling him things that he can’t say to Akihiko face-to-face, such as “I love Akihiko to death”, and shows a side of himself that he usually doesn’t show to other people. It seems he speaks out his feelings when he’s with Mafuyu for some reason, which made me wonder if it isn’t Mafuyu who has the power to make people act like that.

——Ugetsu has a mysterious charm as a character. Was there anything you deemed as important when performing him?

Asanuma: It was my first time taking part in a BL show, but I felt that “Given” is a series that portrays emotions very delicately, down to the details. When performing, it’s exactly because the depictions of emotions are detailed that I make sure not to be “too theatrical”.

Love becomes more complicated as you grow older?

——In the TV series, we were able to see Mafuyu and Ritsuka’s high schooler-like romance, yet the movie is about an “adult love”, where they are “going through unfulfilling and agonizing situations, but no matter what, they like each other”. Was there anything you felt seeing their love?

Asanuma: There are things that we end up complicating precisely because we have accumulated experiences as adults. It’s because we know about all sorts of things that we don’t want to get in the other’s way and feelings of inferiority towards the other are born. When you’re a child, you don’t think much about things such as “pulling away because you think too much about the other person”, for example. There are many things we have to face when we become adults, so we might turn the feeling of “romantic love” around in complicated ways.

Nakazawa: I think “being able to break up once and for all” is important in adult romance as well. Not clashing with each other like, “I can’t do this with you anymore!” and parting ways, but instead ending it with, “If that’s how it is, it might be better for us not to be together anymore” after learning about each other’s circumstances is also a form of love. I think that reflecting about not just the feeling of “love”, but also about what you should do to make the “we can’t be together anymore” that lies ahead into a reality is what adult romance is.

Asanuma: They’re called the “adult group”, but they’re not adults yet. Even I, who am in my 40’s, have yet to come across anything like an “unconditional love”...

Eguchi: I believe this is valid for all kinds of romantic love, but I think it’s about being together with someone because you find that person to be an “irreplaceable existence”. And it’s because they’re irreplaceable that going out with them isn’t the goal, and the couple has to properly face one another. Also, when I looked at their romance, I felt it’s precisely because they like and are close to each other that there are words between them that they can’t say. They might have had a different relationship if they had conveyed those words, but there are words that can’t be conveyed exactly because this possibility exists. I think humans are extremely complex.

“Eguchi-kun is sharp!” – A casting that fit perfectly.

——What kind of appeal did you feel in each other’s acting and personalities through “Given”?

Nakazawa: The way that Asanuma-san bears a “quiet intensity” when playing as Ugetsu is very charming.

Asanuma: For real!?

Eguchi: And you’re also too good at putting on the air of a genius!

Asanuma: It’s only putting on, though. I have to make sure not to take it off too soon (laughs).

Eguchi: It had me thinking, “The way he envelops himself in the air of a genius is just genius!” Asanuma-san can push and pull splendidly. I was thinking, “He’s so awesome” when I watched it.

Asanuma: There are times when I tend to explain things with my voice no matter what. Before, in a different work, the sound director told me, “The animation is already doing the explanation, so you don’t have to try to explain with your voice so much.” In works like this one, where the subtleties of the characters’ hearts are so detailed, I think it’s even more important to bear in mind “not being too theatrical”, without deeming it as an exception just because it’s a BL, but instead seeing it as a love pattern that could happen anywhere and performing naturally.

——What is your impression of Nakazawa-san?

Asanuma: Nakazawa-san is tolerance incarnate! He can be no one but Haruki.

Eguchi: That’s right. He gives off a “mom” vibe (laughs). He’s like that during the recordings too; Nakazawa-san himself is a very soft person.

Asanuma: And although he may disagree, “looking troubled” suits him.

Nakazawa: I disagree!

All three: (Burst into laughter).

Asanuma: Since being troubled suits you, it feels like people gather around you, thinking that they “want to try and give you trouble” without any ill intent.

Nakazawa: That rings a bell (laughs). Indeed, I myself think that I have a Haruki-like side too. I also have a side that accepts basically anyone and any kind of comment... As for Eguchi-kun, if nothing else, he’s sharp! In terms of voice quality, his tone is low-pitched and solid, so the acting that he brings out is extremely sharp. There’s a fineness to it where it acts as a detonator, especially in “Given”, as if it will set fire, to his heart’s contentment, to anything that seems inflammable. He pulls off an acting that has an explosiveness to it, as he takes ahold of the important points while performing in a natural manner, so I have a lot of trust in him.

Asanuma: Eguchi-kun gives off a sense of broad-mindedness and security. Not because his body is big, though (laughs). I feel that he’s something like an emotional bodyguard. It was my first time in a BL series, but when I heard that Eguchi-kun would be the other party, I vaguely thought that “everything will go well”.

Eguchi: Thank you so much!

[myrandom-fandomlife]

I Think I Kinda, You Know Chapter 1: The Agreement

JJ Maybank x Carrera! Reader 

Moodboard, Summary, and Playlist

Gif Credit 

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Swearing, implications of smut, mentions of a toxic relationship and cheating

A/N: So, I’ve been working on this for a while, trying to make it an awesome first chapter. I was originally going to write actual smut into it, but I decided against it because I feel like my smut is super cringe. I might write descriptive smut in future chapters. I’m really proud of this, so I hope you guys like. Huge thanks to my beta and irl best friend @otherfandomsrun​ for proof reading, helping with ideas, and hyping me up. Show her some love! I kinda ended this on a cliff hanger, but I’m already working on chapter 2! Fic is below the cut, and feel free to ask to be on the tag list!

You sat next to your sister, Kiara, on the HMS Pogue. That pogue group of friends had expanded quite a bit in the last year. First it was you, Kie finally deeming you old enough to tag along on their adventures. (Which you had, anyway. You were only a year younger, for God’s sake.) Then Sarah, who you and Kie weren’t too fond of, but once you got to know her she was actually pretty awesome. Sarah’s dating John B, Kie and Pope are… complicated, which leaves you and JJ. Generally, you are left alone together because the others have paired off, and recently there has been some unexplained tension between the two of you. You couldn’t lie either, JJ is hot. But, you knew JJ wasn’t one for commitment, and if Kiara knew about your attraction to him, you wouldn’t hear the end of it. So you try your best to repress any non-platonic feelings of attraction down.

“You good Y/N?” Sarah asked. She’s laying her head in John B’s lap across from you. Pope is driving the boat and Kie is next to you, looking out at the water. JJ is on the other side of you, smoking.

“Yeah, just spaced out for a second. I’m good though,” You smiled and leaned over to the cooler to grab another beer. 

“I’m bored,” JJ complains, promptly stealing your beer, taking a long gulp. 

“Come on, JJ! I just opened that!” He smirks at you so retaliate by stealing his blunt from his hand and taking a hit.

“I know,” He takes another long drink. You take another hit and blow the smoke in his face. 

Kie pinches your side, making you flinch, “Careful. If you go home smelling like weed, mom and dad will have a fit.” Your parents weren’t strict, really. And they had warmed up to your group of friends quite a bit, occasionally inviting them over to dinner or to eat at the restaurant. Surprisingly, your mom’s favorite of the group was JJ, and she had always wanted either you or Kie to date him. She loved Pope, though, of course, but you thought she probably wanted to take in JJ as the son she never had. 

“Nah, Kie, let her live a little. Plus, your parents aren’t home tonight. Something about a ‘much needed date night.’” He shrugs at your confused faces and steals the joint back, taking a long drag. “She told me I have to stay with Y/N while Kie is working late tonight.” She was always talking to JJ and putting him to work when he came over to pick up you and Kie, so you weren’t surprised she had told him that before you guys left.

“Oh no, you don’t have t-” You start.

“I’m glad she’ll have someone there, I don’t like her being home alone,” Kie cuts you off, giving you a look that says ‘don’t argue with me, because I’ll win.’

“Yeah, some of the guys on Figure Eight, are super creepy,” Sarah adds. John B nods in agreement, but you think he’s dozing off. 

“You mean like, your brother?” Kie asks, causing Sarah to laugh.

“That guy, Chad, that Y/N dated was a huge creep, though,” JJ adds with a hint of hostility, and everyone nods in agreement. 

“And a cheater!” Pope calls, causing you to tense up. Chad was still a sore subject for you. You had dated for 6 months and right at the end you found out he had been sleeping with other girls the whole time. You broke up about a month ago and you were definitely over him, but it still hurt to know you wasted 6 months of your life on that scumball.

“Too soon, man,” JJ answers, passing the blunt back to you. You and him had grown closer in the past month, him being there to comfort you after the break up when the others couldn’t. Not to say that Kie and Sarah weren’t there for you, Sarah came to your house and you three watched movies all night when it happened. Of course, all three of the boys offered to fight him for you- which you politely declined; but it’s the thought that counts. Everyone helped you cope one way or another, but whether they were working, doing school work, or navigating their own new relationships, they couldn’t be there for you as much as JJ had in the past month. You weren’t mad at all, though. You were sort of grateful it had been him. Everyone else was walking on eggshells around you the first week or two, like they were scared to be happy in front of you. JJ was his usual self, though. He would make you laugh, and let you cry. He was there when you needed him most, and you were glad.

You happily take his offer and shrug the comment off, “It’s okay, J, he’s right.” He gives you a sympathetic look that says, you sure? And you nod, handing his joint back. 

“Oh shoot, I have work in an hour,” Kie says just as we pull up to the dock.

“Dad needs me home tonight to help with some project at the house,” Pope adds, while JJ starts securing the boat to the pier.

“Hey,” Sarah taps John B’s face lightly, “We have dinner with my parents soon. Time to wake up.” He stirs and opens his eyes groggily, flinching a little from the light. Everyone gathers their things, sunkissed and exhausted from the day of boating.

“And we have absolutely nowhere to be,” JJ playfully bows and holds out his hand to help you up onto the small deck. 

You laugh and take his hand, stepping off the worn vehicle. “Except for watching Friends at my house.”

“Very true. Pizza?” He asks brightly. JJ coming over to watch movies or binge a tv series while eating pizza with you and sometimes Kie had become a common occurrence. These nights usually ended with the two or three of you falling asleep sprawled on the sofa together.

You nod, “Duh.” A small chuckle escapes him and you walk up to the Chateau, where you had all met that morning. Then you all start going your separate ways, but you, Kie, and JJ all pile into the silver SUV your parents had gotten for Kiara when she turned 16. They got you a car when you turned 16 a couple of months ago, but Kie liked driving more than you did. You thought maybe it made her feel like you still needed her, which you do. You can’t imagine not having Kie to help you through everything in your crazy life. 

The sound of JJ saying your name from the front seat snaps you out of your thoughts, “What, JJ?” 

He turns his head and his lips curve into a smirk, “Oh nothing, I was just saying how hot you look tonight.” He then bursts out laughing at what you assume is the look on your face.

Small giggles leave you. Kie shoves JJ’s shoulder lightly and adds, “Stop hitting on my sister!” At that you and Kiara crack up too, the car filled with your laughter as you head home.

--------

Approaching the large house, Kie jumps out of her car almost as soon as it’s parked, muttering about being late and needing to get ready. As you and JJ head inside, JJ questions, “Want me to order the pizza?”

“Yeah, I just want to change out of this swimsuit,” You scrunch your nose up, “Saltwater.”

He softly smiles, “The usual?” You shake your head yes and shoot him a grin in return before turning to go up the stairs. You swear you can feel his eyes on you as you retreat.

You try to be quick, donning a cropped t-shirt and some cotton shorts. You throw your hair into a messy bun, bounding down the stairs when you’re done. Your eyes land on the blonde-haired boy in the living room and you see that he already has the pizza, “What are you? Magic?”

His eyes slowly trail down your body, making your face heat up, but he laughs, “Nah, just had to name drop and I was given high priority on my order.”

You giggle, and he adds that Kie had left for work while you were changing. You help get blankets set up on the couch, and turn on the tv. He’s already grabbed a few beers to split between the two of you and you usually just eat the pizza straight out of the box. Pressing play on Friends, you start your favorite kind of night.

--------

A whole pizza and two beers each into your sleepover, you’re both feeling a little buzzed. Currently, you are discussing Chandler and Monica’s relationship, “Yeah, I don’t know. I haven’t been laid in a while so I feel like I need a situation like them, where they just have sex. Minus the feelings though, because gross.” You shudder dramatically and he laughs.

“Yeah, I agree. I just want someone I can have really good sex with, no strings attached.”  He pauses, then looks up at you, a calculating expression on his face.

Then you get what he’s thinking, “JJ...”

“No, think about it. We’re both super hot, we both want to get laid, and we both want no feelings. We could even make a contract if that makes you feel better?” He rambles for a second, still thinking.

“Okay, say we did do this. What would the rules be?”

“Well, there’s the obvious one. The other pogues cannot know. Especially not Kie.” He licks his lips.

You nod, “Yeah, I get that. How about, if one of us gets uncomfortable with the arrangement, we stop?”

He meets your eyes with his dark blue ones and moves toward you on the couch, “Agreed. The last one is very important. We absolutely are not allowed to fall in love. Can you manage?” His lips curve into that smirk again and you can’t help but let a small laugh tumble past your lips.

“I can, can you?” He moves even closer from his side of the couch, and your breathing hitches. The noises from the TV can’t be heard over the sound of your blood rushing in your ears.

“Definitely.” Then his lips are on yours and you forget how to breathe for a second. His tongue is exploring your mouth, hands moving to the bottom of your thighs to wrap your legs around his waist. He starts kissing down your neck, your hands pulling at his hair and making him groan into you.

You feel him bite down on your soft skin, your chest heaving. “Fuck, JJ. Upstairs,” You moan when he continues his antics. He complies with your request and let’s just say, it was a very good night.

--------

You wake up naked, with an ache between your legs as you slowly recall the events from the night before. You groggily open your eyes, spotting a familiar blonde head right away. He looks peaceful. You turn over to check your clock and realize you have an hour until your early work shift, meaning Kie will be knocking at your door very soon.

“Shit,” You tap JJ lightly on the shoulder and he stirs, “J, get up, Kie’s gonna be at my door soon and I don’t think she’s gonna like that you’re currently naked in my bed.”

He smiles, “Good morning to you, too, sunshine.”

You hit him with your pillow, “I’m serious, JJ!” You get up, stumbling a bit on your sore legs, which he smiles proudly at. Then you’re rushing to put some clothes on and he reluctantly does the same.

He puts his hands out in front of him in surrender, “Okay, okay. How am I supposed to get out without Kie seeing? I can’t exactly walk out the front door.”

“Um.. how about the window?” Before JJ could respond, there was a knock at the door, both of your eyes widening in shock.

Tag list: @treestarrrrrrrr​ @sspidermanss​ @harrysbbby​ @thatsonobx​

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 9

As promised, two chapters in one day! HBD to this trash rabbit. I just get thirstier with age.

Rating: Explicit.

‼️TW: Reader is EIGHTEEN! Recreational drug use, smoking and alcohol consumption, deeply internalised self-loathing, very questionable moral standards. Daddy kink taken half-seriously. BDSM themes in later chapters - explicit content will come with it's own TWs. FIRST PERSON POV. DRUG USE IN THIS CHAPTER. Just generally an uncomfortable vibe, thread carefully.

Summary: You're Peter's classmate, a child of rich and famous but uncaring parents. Getting paired up for a lengthy project with the boy was an interesting turn of events and you don't know whether to feel blessed or cursed when you develop, seemingly, a perfectly normal, harmless crush on Tony Stark. Fueled by feelings of inadequacy and boredom, your life spirals out of control - and you're lucky your newfound friends are there to pick up the pieces even if you cannot find it in yourself to believe these amazing human (and not so human) beings voluntarily give you more than a fleeting glance and an offhanded thought. And they brought cake!

A/N: Ooh, boy. This is a whole mess. Angst. [insert drugs owl meme]. Steve doesn't pass the vibe check yet again, stupid old man. Bruce + Tony be like: I CAN'T GET NO SLEEP CUZ OF Y'ALL.

My beta, whomst I love more than cake - @miscmarvelwritings . She's so beautiful though. And so smart. Wow.

The strobe lights pulsated to the rhythm of the music, bodies swaying, gyrating to the tune. The club was banging this time of night, people were living it up like there was no tomorrow. For me, in the VIP zone it was quieter, calmer, but no less exciting. The atmosphere here was distinctly different from the one on the main floor.

It was hard to wallow in misery even if it only took me an hour to stop resisting the gratuitous amounts of white powder on the silver platters. "It's better when you're there to watch them, they'll do it anyway but at least you can know that they're getting the good stuff!" My idiot father proudly announced, looking at me snorting a line through a rolled up hundred dollar bill.

Whiskey and vodka wasn't doing it for me. It made me feel low and Dad, being Dad, of course noticed it and immediately called a guy who knew a guy and suddenly all of his friends and their baby-faced companions had white under their noses. Cash flew like autumn leaves.

As I went out to the main dance floor to get a closer look at Billie Eilish in all of her edgy, beautiful self, the drug hit me like an avalanche. No trace of the grogginess or the mortification that had hitched a ride on me from Stark tower. I danced and sang and saw dad smiling at me in approval, his equally high and important friends all wearing identically predatory smirks. They were good at spotting the obvious - beauty, talent, money. I had no qualms about the fact that dad was off bragging about my close relationship with Tony. If my father was feeling particularly bold, he'd be telling them he knew and encouraged it all along, his buddies pretending to believe the white lie in turn.

I had exchanged my pants and sneakers in favour of a skirt and fishnets with high heels combo, a decidedly inappropriate attire for a daughter having a family night with her father but he insisted I dress trendy. I loved my dad, I really did, and I knew he meant well - I'd definitely be out of place amongst these TVscreen worthy people in my jeans and sneakers but...Tony was one of those people, and he had never ever said anything bad about the way I dress. Even when I obviously and purposely put on obscene clothing just to get a rise out of someone.Tony just smiled and played along.

Tony Stark was the heartless asshole here? Really, press? Really, haters?

"Standing there, killing time, can't commit to anything but a crime..." I sang along quietly as I hurried back to the VIP area. My dad was standing up and so were a couple of his buddies. "Where's ya goin'?" I asked, taking a seat.

"Be right back baby girl, if you find better company then go on without us," Dad winked, throwing a totally nasty glance at one of the girls. She was not much older than me but her body was stick thin and bolt-ons and Botox were her two best friends. She gave me a dirty look and I returned it, extending a waiting hand towards my dad. He chuckled, depositing a neatly rolled stack of hundreds into my palm.

"Dad, I want a new purse," I whined, just a tad. Just to see the girl's eyes go wide with acrid envy. Dutifully, another couple of stacks landed in my palm without any objections and the company retreated towards the back door.

I sighed.

Fiddled with the straw of my drink a bit, contemplating my options. I could always ditch this party and go somewhere more active, somewhere with better music and kinder people.

"Ay, baby girl, you wanna party with us?" A tall, handsome man from dad's previous company approached me. "We'll have some fun." He maintained a respectful distance but the intentions were clear.

"Nope," I popped the sound, not even sparing him a glance. A few lines of cocaine stared at me from the table beckoning with a better high, a stronger sense of euphoria, confidence and energy to dance, to sing, to be happy. I picked up one of the discarded banknotes, quickly rolling it by a sheer force of habit and cleaning up the tray. One line.

"Holy shit, is that..."

Two lines.

"The fuck?!" I recognised that voice. I have been hearing it every day in the labs, I've been hearing it in my dreams.

Tony was gaping at me, in front of me.

"Hey, Tony. Fancy seeing you here." Any other time, I'd be cringing at my lame greeting but I was feeling way too good to care about trivial things like being clever or being appropriate.

"I was looking...for you," He slowly said, putting a single finger on the tray with the last line of coke and pulling it out of my reach.

"That's funny," I snorted, hastily wiping at my nose to cover the tracks of my very bad, very immoral, very illegal activities.

"It's not, Princess, it's not funny at all," He frowned. "C'mon, we're leaving." And extended his hand. I decided to follow along - there was nothing for me to do at this club anyway, the music was lame and the people were stuck-up.

"I look like a prostitute, Tony, I'll take the back door," I attempted to pull him towards the aforementioned but he didn't budge, just stared straight ahead and towed me along like he was wearing one of his iron suits under the stylish jeans and tee get-up.

He stopped in front of the exit, giving me a critical once over. Wiped my face, again, brushed my hair back. Gave me his shades - I dutifully put them on, figuring the manic look in my eyes was anything but attractive right now. "Jesus Christ, Princess," He sounded desperate. "You're beautiful, don't you fucking worry."

And we made our exit, arm in arm, me trying not to stumble in my high heels, Tony being my rock, my solid foundation. In other words, I was hanging onto him for dear life trying not to fall over and give a reason for a sneaking paparazzi to make a scandalous headline.

"You're doing great, Princess," Tony helped me into his Tesla, slamming the door behind me and hurrying towards the driver's door. I managed to unclasp and kick off my shoes, curling up comfortably into the passenger's seat.

I watched the man as he started the engine and watched him wrestle with whatever personal demons that tormented him as he peeled off and raced into the Friday night city.

"What in the everlasting fuck..." He started, stopping abruptly mid-sentence. "How did you even get in there?"

"I came with dad. He literally ditched me to fuck some whore, like, twenty minutes before you showed up." I shrugged, eyeing the modified panel of the car. It was very obviously Tony's own design. I wondered if he could introduce me to Elon Musk someday.

"What the fuck? And correct me if I didn't hear you clearly," Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. "Your father took it upon himself to drag you to a club, get you drunk, gave you cocaine and fucked off with some groupies?"

"Yah, that's about it. My dad is all about cocaine and whores, the more the better," I replied, leaning in to take a closer look at the car's panel. "Hey, could, like, introduce me to Elon Musk someday? That would be fuckin' awesome."

Tony went eerily quiet, I saw his knuckles on the steering wheel go white. Vague expletives were muttered under his breath. "I'm guessing you're good on sleep?" He finally asked through gritted teeth.

"Sleep? Don't know her," I laughed. "I wanna dance, Tony."

"Of course you do, Princess." His smile was tired and forced and full of pity. "You know, I don't think I'll be able to sleep now, either," He admitted, taking a sharp left. "How about we get some McDonald's and camp out in my lab?"

"Sure, whatever," Not like I had much choice in the matter. What I really craved was a good, long, hard fuck (by Tony himself preferably) but if science calls... I have no choice but to comply. "Get me two Big Macs," I demanded least he try to joke and get me a Happy Meal or some shit.

He did get me the food without any usual grumbling. I didn't like this Tony. Tired Tony, sad Tony, angry Tony. Wrong Tony.

"Huh?" He said and I realized I'd said the last part out loud.

"I don't like a sad Tony,” I said. "It's the wrong kind. Sassy, snarky and perpetually caffeinated Tony is the best Tony. The only proper kind, in fact." I stated with seriousness, shoes dangling from one hand and my McDonald's in the other. Man, I have been seeing more and more of this god-damned elevator recently.

"You're high as a kite, darling," He chuckled then, a real laugh.

"Who's high?" Bruce's voice came from the kitchen.

In a state of blind panic, I jumped behind Tony. "Not me."

Tony palmed his face.

Steve came over from the fridge, leaving the rummaging to Bucky. He took one look at me and suddenly I felt small, insignificant like an ant. I didn't like it much. "Holy hell, the fuck happened? Tony, explain." The Captain demanded, giving me the world's biggest stink eye.

"It's her piece of shit of a father, dragged her off to some night club and left her hanging with his buddies, fucking off god knows where. It's not her fault so lay the fuck off, Rogers, with your self-righteousness," Tony exploded all over Steve, the pent up frustration rearing it's ugly head.

I mustered enough courage to tiptoe around the dick measuring contest to sit at the counter. My appetite was gone and my burgers were turning colder and soggier with every passing second. Just like my life.

"Hey, Princess," Bruce's gentle voice halted my train of thought. He approached me carefully, ignoring the men behind me in favour of simply wrapping me up in a quiet, comfortable hug. "You feel alright? Want some water?"

"Nu-uh," I mumbled, unwilling to part ways with the warmth of this embrace.

"... Steve, I found her snorting miles of coke all by herself while an some jackass was waiting for her to be even more out of it. It's rare that I say this but I had literally zero words." Tony punctuated his words by tapping his fist against the wall multiple times.

Bruce tightened his hold on me, a sudden influx of strength accompanied by a quiet, low growl in his throat.

I felt the sudden need to clarify the situation. "Tony, chill. It takes me a lot more to be out of it, I'm fucking coherent and I'm talking sensibly. It's not my first rodeo."

Apparently I'd gone and said the wrong thing because all the men in the room were suddenly growling. I even totally forgot about Bucky who had the uncanny ability to exist in a room without making absolutely any sort of noise.

"The fuck do you even mean by that, Princess?" Tony screeched, probably already knowing that answer.

"From one rich kid to another, you should damn well fuckin' know," I spat, unwilling to admit my misery.

He sighed, audibly deflating behind me. I refused to listen to him, refused to be humiliated and exposed like that for my perfectly human desire to be happy. To not be a disappointment, to not be disappointed in everything and everyone. Bruce was nice and kind and warm and selfless but even he couldn't love me the way I wanted to be loved. Cherished, taken care of. All that mushy stuff. I was selfish, so I snuggled in closer to him, muting the world around me, replacing it with the smell and feel of him.

Cocaine made it a whole lot easier to imagine. Maybe that's why it was so addictive.

"Guys, calm down, you're stressing everyone out," Bruce rumbled quietly. I loved the way his deep voice seemed to reverb throughout his chest.

"Get me a cup of coffee, would you, Buckaroo?" Tony sighed again. I heard the sound of him slurping at his coffee. I heard Bucky's metal arm clunk against something equally metallic before the supersoldiers bid everyone good night and walked off.

Only then I removed my face from Bruce enough to take a good look at Tony. He was eyeing me, too.

"We have a caffeinated Tony," I said, softly. "Now we just need some science to have a happy Tony."

He smiled but it came out watery. He wanted to say something but choked on his words. "C'mere," He finally said, turning in his chair and opening his arms.

I unashamedly made grabby hands, the universal gesture for ‘I want, gimme’, and Bruce delightfully deposited me into Tony's waiting arms. It was like my birthday and Christmas came out all at once. Tony's embrace was warm, like Bruce's, but tinted with an unexpected familiarity. He smelled like motor oil and fancy cologne. It was heavenly.

"You keeping tabs on me, huh? Coffee, science and sass? That's your recipe for happiness?" The engineer asked me, a seriousness that didn't match the joking tone of the conversation at all.

"I think I got you figured out. Peter, too, is important for happiness. But in controlled amounts," I said, giving it a careful thought.

Tony chuckled, sounding a little bit shocked. "What about you?" He said after a brief moment of silence passed, interrupted only by Bruce's tea kettle coming to a slow boil.

"I don't think you need me for happiness," I said, meaning it. "But let's be honest, I'm a nice addition."

He stilled under me, briefly. Bruce cleared his throat.

"Brucie needs me, I think. He's lonely," I told Tony with a sudden influx of desire to be completely honest and 100% transparent. "And it makes me happy, because I need Bruce too. He's the best," I finished.

"Is that so?" Tony sounded vaguely tearful so I attempted to pull back to take a good look at his face. He didn't let me though, gently but firmly pressing my face back into his chest. "And me?"

"I do need you, Tones," I admitted without spilling any unnecessary details.

There was a child within me, small and scared and lonely, like Bruce. I hated her, hated being so soft and needy when everybody else obviously (and understandably) was busy with figuring out their own lives. I wished, desperately so, to just boom-boom-whoosh her away like Doctor Strange magicked away unwanted visitors.

Tony said nothing but his hands betrayed him. They shook and they held onto the skimpy see-through fabric of my top like he was a drowning man and I was his only floatie. For the moment, I closed my eyes and let myself believe he needed me, too.

"I'll catch a wink or two, wake me up if you need something," Bruce broke the silence, having finished off his tea. I didn't notice the time pass so quickly, too lost somewhere between here and there and Tony. In short, I was being lovesick all over the billionaire.

"Bwucie," I leaned backwards, pushing until Tony caved and let me rest my back against the counter, elbows on top of it, legs dangling freely on the sides of his legs. It put a lot of me on display. Tony had called me beautiful earlier so none of my usual habits of being appropriate around the man concerned me. He thought I was pretty!

"Princess," Banner came over to wrap me in a hug that was quite awkward, considering the fact I was sitting on Tony. It took some maneuvering to get it right.

"Night night," I said the usual and got a brief kiss on the cheek before Bruce shuffled off, yawning.

Tony was watching us with an unreadable expression. As soon as I turned my head to look at his face instead, something in him changed. His eyes grew big and round, the crease between his eyebrows disappeared. The corners of his mouth tilted up.

On a sudden impulse, I reached over to run my palm gently over the neatly trimmed line of his beard, following from his chin to his jawline, to his soft tousled hair. His eyelashes shook, fluttered, as the engineer leaned into my touch with the grace of a cat. "Kiss him, kiss him" my brain chanted. I knew I was a coward, I wouldn't do that. "Pretty," I said instead, the word coming out in a whisper.

He gulped, audibly. "Princess, you have no idea..." Shaking his head, as if he was surrounded by a swarm of mosquitoes, Tony briefly looked away. "You have no idea what you're doing."

"Nope," I agreed solemnly. "But at least it feels good. It feels right."

"God," He frowned, one of his hands coming to nervously card through his hair. "Nothing about this is right."

My face fell. Just like I thought, Tony wanted exactly nothing to do with a clueless little teenager. It stung and tears pooled in the corners of my eyes where I stubbornly refused to let them escape and make me into a crybaby. "Whatever you say, Tony." I was ready to agree with anything he said, really, if he would just keet holding me like that.

"Don't," He raised a palm. "Don't close yourself off like that."

Now I was genuinely confused. What exactly did he expect from me? I shrugged.

"You're clever, brilliant and beautiful, you can and should do so much better than all of this," He vaguely gestured towards me, towards himself, towards us and the whole damn city.

I contemplated my answer, briefly. "A lot of people tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing. Don't I get a say?" The bitterness had fought its way out and won. "I just want to be happy for a bit. All the usual bullshit."

He looked taken aback, really. Like he hadn't even considered the option. Typical.

Meanwhile, I continued my word vomit. "I want someone to give a damn about what I want and what makes me happier. Until then, I have no other choice but to take care of myself the best way I know how. Like everybody else does," The weight of his arm landed on my waist, pulling me close to his chest yet again. I didn't resist. No fight left in me. The tiredness seeped deep in my bones, chilly.

The sudden change of altitude startled me. The engineer had picked me up and started walking off towards the elevator, directing it to the lab. His personal lab. The tiles felt cold under my feet where he put me down to make his own beeline for the bar. I would've joined if not the drug in my system - the last thing I wanted was to land in a hospital yet again.

I took the moment to browse my social media, untag myself from all the unflattering pictures, post my usual shitpost. A tiny skirt, equally tiny top and fishnets - I felt out of place in his lab although I've worn more outrageous things previously. I was raw, torn open, bleeding my misery all over the room. That was not in my plan, but then again, when did ever life go as you planned it?

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit @littlegasps @pilloclock @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @as-i-layhereinyourbed @sleep-i-ness @gigglyfox01

please check your blog settings before tag request or, alternatively, follow the "party favours" tag itself if Tumblr doesn't let me tag you - it does that for some reason. love you all 3000.

[storiesforallfandoms]

love on tour ~ rook

word count: 2310

request?: yes!

“Could you do one for rook where him and his girl are just being really cute together on tour and the boys have never seen him so happy before. Thank you 🖤”

description: rook manages to convince the crew to let his girlfriend come on tour, and his friends get to see first hand how happy he is when he’s with her

pairing: rook x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist

The idea of bringing a girl on tour was not one that the crew was very fond of, and they made that known when Rook asked. They didn’t think tour was the place for a girl, especially not a girlfriend. The crew loved to party, to drink and do drugs, and all of them, excluding Rook, liked to bring girls back to their hotel rooms or to the tour bus.

“Do you really think your girlfriend will be okay with that?” Baze asked Rook as Rook tried for the millionth time to convince them.

“We met at a party,” Rook responded. “She loves to drink, she’s a party animal, and as long as I’m not the one bringing girls back to my room or to the tour bus I can’t see her having a problem with you guys doing it.”

After some more attempts at convincing them, the band finally said yes. The following month when tour started again, Rook’s girlfriend was there before any of them, leaning against the tour bus with a bag at her feet. Rook raced up to her and took her into his arms, lifting her off the ground and spinning her around.

“Hey baby,” he said, giving her a kiss. “Here, meet the guys. This is Baze, Slim, Dub, of course you know Kells. Guys, this is (Y/N).”

“It’s nice to meet you guys,” (Y/N) said as she shook their hands. “Rook talks about you guys all the time. Thank you so much for being cool with me coming with you guys. I’ve been dying to see what it’s like when Rook goes on tour.”

The boys shared a look but smiled at (Y/N). When the introductions were finished, the group boarded the tour bus. Rook showed (Y/N) around the bus and showed her where her bunk would be.

“If the bunks were bigger I’d say we could sleep in the same bunk,” he said. “But they’re so small I think we’d both feel claustrophobic in the same bunk.”

“I totally understand. They barely look big enough for one person,” (Y/N) noted as she threw her bag into her bunk. “So, when’s the first show? If it’s tonight, I should probably nap now so I can keep up with you guys both during and after the show.”

“The first show isn’t until tomorrow night, you have plenty of time to sleep,” Rook assured her, planting a sweet kiss on her lips.

“Get a room!” Slim called as he passed between them, throwing his own bag onto a top bunk and raising himself into it. “But not this one, I’m taking a nap.”

(Y/N) and Rook laughed together as Slim pulled the curtain to his bunk across.

“There’s a TV back here,” Rook said, nodding towards the back room in the tour bus. “We can watch movies or play video games if you want.”

“Oh, you’re so on. Whatever is there, I’ll kick your ass.”

~~~~~~

While the boys weren’t exactly too comfortable with the idea of a girlfriend joining them on tour, they soon warmed up to (Y/N). The first show on the tour, she was front row, cheering Kells on as he performed. Each of them swore she screamed the loudest out of anyone there where Kells did the band introductions and got to Rook.

When the first show was over, an after party was planned at the nearest bar. None of the boys were really sure how she’d keep up with their partying, but they found out soon enough they didn’t have to worry about it at all. (Y/N) was nearly drunk about an hour into the after party, and she would often join the boys for a quick puff of a joint outside. She solidified herself that night, however, when she hooked Kells up with a girl.

“How did you do that?” Slim asked her in amazement as he watched Kells escorting his new date for the night out of the club.

“Simple,” (Y/N) responded, “you find a girl who is almost if not more drunk than you, make sure she isn’t here with a date or anything, you talk up your friend, and then just introduce them and let the sparks fly.”

The boys were impressed. She laughed as their shocked faces. “I had some guy friends in college I used to run with, they were the type that wanted to only hook up in college but had absolutely zero game. One night, one of them and I were talking at the bar together and this girl approached him asking him if he would buy her a drink, then asked to dance, and by the end of the night he went home with her. Apparently having a female friend with him made him more approachable, and when that female friend talks you up to the girl the deal is sealed in seconds.”

Slim through an arm around Rook. “Make sure she comes to every after party! I want to see her work her magic more often.”

And so she did. The next night they had another show, and thus another after party. That night, she managed to score girls for both Slim and Baze. The night after that Dub, and one night she even got girls for all four of them.

After the last had left, a dopey smile on his face and a girl on his arm, (Y/N), who was so drunk she could barley walk straight on this night, stumbled into Rook and leaned into him.

“I think they’re starting to like me,” she slurred before planting a wet kiss on Rook’s cheek.

He laughed. “They always liked you, but now they respect you even more.”

Then there was the way Rook acted when she was around.

At first, it annoyed the guys a little bit. Rook would always want to be near (Y/N), to have his arms around her, to be touching her. Some nights they’d leave the after parties early to either go back to the hotel room or to the tour bus to have sex. Being boys, they hated (Y/N) “barging in on guy time”, but all that changed when they started to notice Rook’s happiness.

It wasn’t like it was subtle changes, it was very obvious changes. Rook was smiling more, laughing more, especially when (Y/N) was around. His face would light up when she walked into a room, even more so when she even just stood next to him. When she was standing front row, Rook would perform his heart out, as if the only person he ever had to impress was his girlfriend, and now that she was here it was time to really start playing. The guys took note of his happiness, it was hard not to.

On one night halfway through the tour, the band had to leave immediately from one place to get to where the next show was. So, instead of having an actual after party, they had one with just the six of them in the tour bus. They all picked up alcohol before hitting the road, and were well into their choices by the time midnight hit.

They were playing music through the speakers while Kells, Slim, and (Y/N) danced crazily (and drunkenly). Dub and Baze were sat at the kitchen table, rolling a joint, while Rook was sat on the couch with the window open, smoking one of his own. He watched his girlfriend with a smile on his face. He couldn’t be happier to have her here. He was dreading having to go on tour without her and not get to see her for nearly six months. He knew he wouldn’t be able to always take her on tour, but he liked that he’d be able to from time to time now that the boys liked her.

The song playing came to a close and (Y/N) collapsed onto the couch next to Rook. She took the joint from his hand and took a long drag from it.

“I think you need a drink, not a joint,” Rook teased her as she passed it back. She turned to him and opened her mouth, blowing the cloud of weed smoke into his face, causing him to sputter. She laughed and took a mouthful of her beer.

“Yo, turn down the music a second guys,” Kells said, bringing everyone’s attention to him. Baze, who was nearest to the remote for the tour bus stereo system, picked it up and turned it down so that it was now a dull whisper. Kells picked up his own drink and held it over his head. “Everyone, raise your drinks - ” they all did so. “ - and follow me in this toast to (Y/N)!”

“To (Y/N)!” everyone besides (Y/N) cheered after him.

“Not only can she party harder than any of us assholes,” Kells continued, “and not only can she pick up chicks for us better than we ever could, but she also makes our man Rook the happiest he’s ever been, and for that we’re grateful to have her on this tour and we invite her to come on as many tours as she wants!”

A chorus of “here here”s rang out as the boys took a drink. (Y/N) beamed with pride, and so did Rook, who was looking at her with more love than he had ever looked at anyone with, before he, too, swallowed the rest of his drink.

The after party went on for hours, and soon enough everyone went to bed. Everyone except for (Y/N) and Rook, who were cuddled up on the tour bus couch, watching the sun rise in a new state.

“Is it weird that I’m not tired?” (Y/N) asked Rook as she watched the sun getting higher. “I’ve been up at least twenty four hours now, or almost anyways, and I feel as though I just slept for twelve.”

“Well, you did just party all night,” Rook pointed out. “Could still be the alcohol and the adrenaline pumping through your veins. I give you twenty minutes before you can’t stay awake and half an hour before you’re out like a light.”

“I’ll take that bet,” (Y/N) said, holding her hand out to awkwardly shake Rook’s. They both laughed as Rook tightened his hold on her and kissed her forehead. “The guys really like me that much, huh?”

“Of course they do, why wouldn’t they?” Rook asked. “You’re the most awesome person ever, anyone who didn’t like you would be crazy.”

“Maybe, but I do know they weren't thrilled about me joining the tour.” Rook moved to give (Y/N) a shocked looked that made her giggle. “Please babe, I’m not stupid. I could tell the moment they saw me that they weren’t thrilled that I’d be joining you guys. It wasn’t until after the first show, and the first after party, that I could tell they were warming up to me. Even then, I knew they didn’t like me always hanging around and being attached to your hip, which I totally understand and I try not to be too clingy around you.”

“You’re the total opposite of clingy,” Rook assured her. “I love having you around, no matter who I’m hanging out with. And yeah, you caught my dirty little lie I guess. They weren’t too excited about a girl joining us on tour, much less a girlfriend. They said it was because they were afraid you weren’t going to enjoy the tour lifestyle, but I know it’s because we’re usually just the guys on tour. Even when we have girlfriends, we’re just a bunch of kids from Cleveland living our dreams when we go on tour, and they were afraid that’d be threatened by the addition of a girlfriend to the mix.”

(Y/N) moved in a way that left her laying on top of Rook, looking down at his face. “Why did you want me to come on tour so bad?”

“Honestly, I just didn’t want to leave you home. We haven’t been away from each other that long yet, and I wasn’t ready to leave you for six months while we went on tour. Plus, I’d like to bring you on tour more often so I wanted to see if you’d enjoy yourself first.”

“Well I certainly am enjoying myself, you don’t have to worry about that, but you know we'll have to be apart eventually when you go on tour. I can’t come on all of them, I need to work and make money to afford my apartment and my car and stuff.”

“I know that, but to have you come on even just one tour was enough for me. Getting to spend these extra six months with you, plus however long we’ll have before the next tour, is enough to tie me over when I have to leave again.”

(Y/N) giggled and leaned down to kiss Rook. His arms wrapped around her and held her tightly to him, never wanting to let go.

“You make me so happy,” he mumbled against her lips, causing her to giggle.

“You make me happy, too, baby. I am really happy to get to experience all of this with you, and I’d love to come experience it again...and again...and again. Many times I’d love to experience it.”

Rook laughed and kissed her again. She settled her head in the crook of his neck, her eyes beginning to grow heavy. Within seconds, she felt herself drifting off into sleep. Rook listened to her breathing become heavy and checked his watch, raising his arms slowly as not to wake (Y/N).

“Twenty minutes,” he whispered to himself. “I was off by ten, but I think this still means I win.”

[nobodyfamousposts]

Twilight Spite: When the Tables Turn

Well, since Midnight Sun is coming out later this year, I figured I’d dust this off and share a “what if”.

__________________________

Nobody quite knew what to say to Leah’s announcement.

“Bull.”

Well, almost nobody.

“Sam.” Billy Black called, a warning in his tone.

But the alpha didn’t seem to hear him, remaining resolute as he glared at Leah. “There’s no way that it’s true.”

“Well, it is.” Leah replied with a smile that totally wasn’t a smirk as she watched his growing outrage. It said something when not even the touch of his precious imprint could calm him. Leah could practically see the fur starting to form on his skin as he barely held back his transformation.

“You’re making it up. She has to be making it up.” He insisted, turning from Leah to the rest of the Council, his words taking on an almost pleading lilt as he looked to them for support.

But the Council members seemed hesitant. Uncertain, even. Because…well…it could very well be true.

“I assure you, I was just as surprised as you when it happened.” Leah proclaimed sincerely. Because, well, she had been surprised.

___________________________

“Hello, Leah! We come in peace! And with a special offer just for you!”

It all started with an appearance by an overly cheerful vampire bearing an offer she couldn’t refuse.

Well, that wasn’t quite true. Everything really started with her boyfriend disappearing, then coming back only to break her heart and dump her for her cousin she just met, and said cousin deciding it was totally cool to break her heart further by getting with him regardless. The whole reservation cheering them on certainly hadn’t helped. Nor had turning into a wolf and having to have their “happy relationship” shoved in her face AND her head. Nor her father’s death, which seemed to be her fault for reasons she hadn’t known of and couldn’t control, and no one would so much as give her time off to grieve for. Being used simultaneously as a scapegoat and wank material for a group of teenage boys was just the fucking cherry on top.

So yeah, the unexpected visit from the leech wasn’t technically where it all started.

Just where it finally started getting good.

Alice was…perky. Annoyingly so. The more time she spent in her presence, the more Leah was certain that was as much of a permanent, unchangeable aspect of her personality as her annoying and incessant need to know and control things.

Leah was apparently another thing to control. If that wasn’t a common trait shared with everyone else in her life, Leah would find herself particularly insulted and ready to attack.

As it was…well…at least Alice had an offer to make it worth her while.

Given that this offer was coming from the enemy of her tribe, the obvious answer shouldn’t have just been “no”, it should have been a clear and resounding “hell no” followed by a death gurgle. But Leah’s tribe hadn’t been the most loyal or supportive by this point, what with the cheating and disparaging comments and the constant degrading of her when she’d already suffered so much because of them. So no, Leah wasn’t feeling particularly loyal in return.

To the contrary, she was feeling particularly petty and vengeful—which they all knew and not only did nothing to help, but actually went well out of their way to encourage and nurture within her. So really, it was their own fault if she made the choice to give them the finger.

So that was why she decided to at least listen to the leech’s offer.

And oooooh, what an offer it was.

It was no secret that Leah….kind of hated her life at the moment. And could anyone blame her?

…okay, yes. They clearly did. Acting like what Sam and Emily did was HER fault, that them leaving her was deserved, and that her transformation—a traumatic experience for her, by the way and one that cost her her father’s life through no fault of her own—was something she should be happy with. So regardless of the situation and how much she never wanted it, she should just “shut up and deal”.

But could anyone who WASN’T part of the “all boys’ club”, only there for the free—if plastic-like food from Emily, or otherwise had their heads up Sam’s ass blame her?

Alice couldn’t, surprisingly enough. And maybe it was all a trick to get her guard down and have her help their enemies, but it kind of said something when the freaking soulless vampires offered more sympathy for her situation than her own family.

Yeah, thanks Mom. Thanks, Seth. THANK-FUCKING-YOU, EMILY. REALLY appreciated the support during her time of need. Always great to have your family with you...on the other side of the house, setting up dates with your father’s best friend, gushing about how “awesome” your ex is after he crushed your heart, and picking out wedding dresses to be married to your ex in not even a year after he dumped you for her. Family of the fucking year, let her tell you.

And yet she couldn’t help but love them still. How sick was that?

It was messed up. The whole situation was. She couldn’t deal with it there, not with them, not while everyone just wanted her to shut up and smile like she wasn’t being torn apart inside.

So when Alice approached her with a promise to help, Leah found herself surprisingly willing to at least hear her out. She expected to laugh at whatever she offered. She expected to tear her a new one. She even expected to go to the Council and warn them of the trick.

She…never expected she’d be agreeing to it.

“We don’t want a war.” Alice assured her, pleading. “We like Bella. And we like it here in Forks. We don’t want to fight. But the Volturri know about Bella now, and they are insistent she HAS to become a vampire to preserve the secret or else THEY will kill her, and possibly all of us.” She let out a breath, looking up at Leah in worry. “And possibly your people as well once they discover you.”

Okay, she had a valid point. But…

“Why not just go to Sam and the Council about this?” They were all about “keeping the peace” over all else—Leah was on the receiving end of THAT well enough to know. So surely they would be on board with this one sacrifice to keep everyone else safe.

“It’s the truce. We can’t come onto your land. And the wolves we’ve spoken with have been…very insistent on us not turning Bella.”

Ah, Jacob. Yeah, sounded about right. The brat had been doing nothing but moaning about Bella and her preference for dead guys who could give her immortality and a fancy life over him and his…him. Even in the same breath he shot snide comments at Leah for losing the relationship she—y’know…ACTUALLY HAD.

Not that she was resentful about the blatant bias and double-standard or anything as everyone coddled him for a relationship with a girl that was clearly never “in” to him in the first place. Not at aaaaaall…

“Why come to me with this then?” Surely they had to know that she…wasn’t exactly a pleasant person to work with right now. Even—especially with her own people, much less outsiders. And that out of everyone, she would be the least inclined to work with the monsters directly responsible for her people turning into wolves and effectively ruining every aspect of her life because of it.

YES, she was still bitter about it. And she would be for a long time. Maybe the tribe should invest in some therapy instead of a new house for the “happy couple”?

“Because you’re the best choice, Leah.”

AKA, “I used future sight and this was the result I liked.” Leah wasn’t sure she liked the idea of placing bets with someone who used visions for everything the way most people use their cell phones.

“You’re clearly not happy here, but you can’t do anything about it. We could help each other!” Alice explained, rocking on her heels. “I know you don’t like us, but you don’t want a war anymore than we do.”

There was a tense pause.

Then Leah sighed.

“Fair enough.”

Alice cheered up at that, smiling widely. “Great! So if this works, we’ll take you with us when we leave Forks in the next year. We’ll give you money and documents—anything you need to set up a new life! You could go to college! Ooo! You could go to a really fancy university and get a fashion degree and become a model and marry a rich socialite and—!”

Okay, cutting that off right now. “And in exchange?”

That got a frown—though whether it was because she cut off Alice’s gushing rant or because it reminded her of just what she was asking Leah to do, it was a bit hard to tell.

“In exchange, we need you to do just one thing…”

___________________________

“You can’t be serious, Leah.”

“Dead serious.” Leah replied, cackling madly on the inside. But on the outside, her eyes seemed to shine with a joy that anyone could be convinced was because of her claim. A claim that had half of the room sending one another glances of abject confusion, and the rest of the room as some variant of enraged and—in Emily’s case, probably secretly happy.

“It’s just…it’s not possible!” Sam insisted, sounding almost desperate.

“Neither was a female wolf, and yet here we are.” She said with a blithe shrug.

She’d been bitter and “a harpy”. Everyone knew it. Everyone held that against her, regardless of the reasons all of them knew yet none of them wanted to acknowledge were wrong. Even those that sympathized were pushing her to simply “get over it”, completely blind as to why she was acting the way she was.

It was only because she was stuck in a situation forced on her—one where she was trapped and degraded and imposed upon in every way possible, and forced to defend herself the only way she could.

But now she could fight back.

And by every single god out there, she was damn well going to use it. Even if she had to lie through her teeth. Even if she had to fake feelings she didn’t have for someone she didn’t like.

If that meant getting some sweet SWEET payback on her ex? And throwing his own actions and justification for those actions back in his perfect little face? Well…

“I imprinted on Edward Cullen.”

Watchu gonna do about it? 

[dawnie1988]

Summary: When setting up a dating profile, a picture really is worth a thousand words. And it turns out that, sometimes, getting that perfect photo requires the assistance of a helping hand

Words: 1,853

Pairings: Dean, Unnamed OFC - Who may or may not be loosely based on the same woman who inspired this whole thing in the first place

Warnings: Language, Bad Lighting, Impatient Doggies......That should just about cover it

A/N: Umm, so surprise! I did a thing! Inspired by this *gif set* and the subsequent conversation after with the amazing @thoughtslikeaminefield​​ regarding just how it was Dean got that profile picture for the dating app. It was only meant to be a fun little joke type thing of sorts, but after getting love and encouragement from some very fine ladies that I admire greatly, it is now seeing the light of tumblr. Miss MJ was also kind enough to give it a look through for a little clean up and any major mistakes and created the fantastic header! It really does pay to have friends in high places 😊

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

This was stupid.

 He was, he had no problem saying, one of the best hunters in the world. He had saved the world multiple times. Yeah, ok, maybe Sam helped a little, but still. He had fought both heaven and hell more times than he could count anymore.

 And yet, here he stood, unable to get one decent picture of himself.

 Stupid.

 It was the only thing left to do to complete his profile, to add his profile picture. He had been very tempted to just leave it blank, or just put a logo of something he liked. But that wouldn't do. You go on a dating site and refuse to put up an actual photo of yourself? Pshhh, yeah, because that doesn't just scream: STRANGER DANGER! I HAVE SOMETHING TO HIDE!

 The whole point was to attract potential dates, not scare them away before he even had a chance to lay on the charm. And, plus, how would he attract anyone without actually showing off the goods?

 Advertising. It's all in the advertising.

The problem was, try as he might, he couldn't get a fitting picture of himself. Not one that truly showed off his full appeal.

 What? He wasn't allowed to think himself a handsome son of a bitch without being considered arrogant? Screw that! Body positivity, man. We're all beautiful in our own way, we should all believe it.

 Maybe he should put that in his profile too? Didn't chicks dig shit like that? Whatever…

 The photo. That was the issue. He couldn't ask Sam to do it, fuck no. He'd never let Dean hear the end of it if he knew he even had a dating profile. Besides, this was none of Sam's business. What Dean did in his private time was his and his alone.

 But, as it turned out, Dean wasn't very proficient in the art of selfie-taking. For one, the lighting in the bunker was horrendous. He'd gone all throughout their underground home and the results were either him bathed in shadows or being completely washed out underneath the harsh, fluorescent lights.

 And trying to find a flattering angle was damn near impossible! How the hell all those social media people did it was beyond him. Clearly, they were using every filter imaginable to improve their outcome. Not him though. Artificial was not his style. No enhancements needed.

Self. Love. People.

 It was as he was pacing around in the garage, trying to formulate his next plan of attack when inspiration struck. He caught Baby's eye — er, headlight, and Yahtzee!

 Baby was a total chick magnet. And, where did they both shine the most? That's right, out in the clear wide open. On the road, sun shining, not a care in the world. Natural lighting.

 Perfect.

 He drove for a while, scouting possible locations along the way while also simply enjoying the quiet time with Baby. Even if he was on a mission.

 Eventually, he pulled off the road near a lakefront that also served as a nice walking path for nature lovers. It was a beautiful, clear day, the whole scene very idyllic.

 This was it. This was the spot.

 However, there was still the hiccup of actually getting the picture taken. After the slightly traumatizing experience of trying to take his selfie, he couldn't bring himself to attempt that avenue again. He thought he could still do it himself regardless. There was a fence nearby, all he had to do was set the timer on the phone and presto! Done!

 You would think, that is.

 In reality, every time he tried to prop his phone up it would fall back down before he could even make it back to Baby.

 Just as he was about to throw the godforsaken device, like an angel from heaven — the fairytale kind, not the dicks with wings — she appeared.

 "Need some help there?"

 As if he had been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to, Dean quickly whipped around and was greeted by the lovely sight of a woman, perhaps a little older than himself, walking her two dogs.

 He took just a moment, because he simply had too, to admire her beauty. Sun-kissed skin, freckles that put his own to shame, friendly hazel eyes that held a multitude of warmth…

 Yes. An angel seemed a very apt description.

 Dean cleared his throat before an uncomfortable amount of silence was allowed to pass between them, feeling a slight blush tinged his cheeks when his mind came back around to acknowledge her question.

 "Uh, actually I umm… yes," he fumbled out.

 Why was he suddenly nervous? He felt so out of place now, he didn't like it. Still, he continued.

 "You see, I…"

 The woman cut him off — a mercy killing, it felt like to Dean — with a raised hand.

 "Let me guess, dating profile?" she asked, not at all trying to hide the knowing smirk.

 Something in Dean loosened at the understanding he found in his new acquaintance’s gaze. Shoulders relaxing, he let out a slightly bashful chuckle while giving a one-shoulder shrug.

 "Guilty. That obvious, huh?"

 She gave a small shake of her head. "Game recognizes game. I have my own experience and horror stories involving the dreaded profile picture. If you want, I can give you a hand?"

 Dean's eyes lit up at the offer. He knew it. He was not ashamed of it.

 "Yeah?"

 She laughed at his eagerness, a sweet-sounding melody, Dean noted to himself.

 "Sure. After all, I couldn't just leave you here without putting you out of your misery first. I'm no monster."

 She was teasing, of course. It didn't stop Dean from having to bite his tongue and swallow the comment about monsters that begged to be spoken. If only he had a nickel for every time he had heard that line.

 "Okay, awesome. Thank you."

 "No problem," she replied easily, accepting the phone he was handing over. "And I'm assuming you want that beauty in the photo with you?" she asked him, indicating Baby, earning a proud smile from Dean in return.

 As he said, Baby was a total chick magnet.

 "Duh."

 She laughed again, much louder and freer this time and the sound again had Dean grinning as he made the walk over to his trusty wing woman.

 "Nice choice. Okay, then, handsome, what are we going for here?"

 Dean faltered in his step slightly. "Uhh, how do you mean?"

 "I mean," she paused for a moment, readjusting the grip she had on the two leashes when the pooches started getting antsy. "What vibe are you trying to portray here? Brooding? Mysterious? Friendly?"

 "Oh, right!" Dean nodded his understanding.

 He thought it over, tilting his head slightly as he contemplated the pros and cons of the different choices in his head.

 "May I offer a suggestion?"

 "Sure, by all means."

 "Well, online dating can be intimidating enough as it is," she began matter-of-factly. "All you've got is a picture and a few words to go on. So, speaking solely on my own experiences, I tend to gravitate towards the more friendly option. You try to be sexy and it feels too put on and forced. You try to be mysterious and all I'm left thinking is what are you trying to hide. But friendly, easy-going and approachable is always a winner. That, makes me want to get to know you a little more. At least enough to read your profile anyways."

 Dean, eyebrows raised and mouth pulled down some, nodded in appreciation. This lady really knew what she was talking about.

 "Right, so friendly it is, then." He clapped his hands together and went to lean against Baby's side before stopping, thinking it over a second and deciding to hop on the hood instead, talking out his thoughts as he tried to determine the perfect pose.

 "So, not too posey, don't try too hard but at least put a little effort in to show I care…." he fidgeted around for a few moments more before falling into a comfortable, casual feeling position. "How's this?" he looked up, waiting for some affirmation.

 Dean would be lying if he said her genuine smile didn't make his stomach flutter a bit.

 "Looks good. Okay, on the count of three, give me your most inviting smile. No teeth though, just easy breezy. Ready?"

 "Ready."

 "One, two, three."

 She tapped the screen to capture the shot and immediately started walking over after checking the results. "I think we have a winner here."

 She handed the phone over to him and he couldn't help the satisfied smile from gracing his lips.

 Damn, he looked good.

 "Nice," he complimented her photography skills. "Well, Hell, I think you're right, I think this is it."

 He made quick work of uploading the photo to the app and confirming his information before finally hitting the 'submit' button to post his profile. He then turned the phone around for her to see again. "Whaddya think?"

 She leaned in closer, shoulder bumping his and dogs yapping around their legs as she looked over his full profile before nodding in approval. "Yup, you'll be beating them away with a stick in no time!"

 His chest may have puffed up with pride a little. Only a little.

 "Yeah? Awesome." He exited out of the app, ignored the text message from Sam wanting to know where the Hell he was and slid his phone into his back pocket.

 "Thanks again. It's, ah…" he brought a hand up to rub at the back of his neck. "All pretty awkward, but you were a big help."

 She gifted him with a megawatt smile as she untangled her dogs from around his legs, getting them ready to continue their walk. "No problem. Good luck with all that. Stay safe out there!"

 She began walking away and Dean found that he couldn't not do it. He had to, right?

 Right.

 "Hey!" he called out, switching gears and putting on his 'wooing' smile, lowering his voice an octave. "Ya know, maybe if you're not busy, I can take you for a cup of coffee or something sometime? My way of..." Dean let the tip of his tongue sneak out to wet his bottom lip while giving her a once over. "Thanking you, properly?"

 She was silent for a moment, brows raising slightly in surprise before a slow smile started to brighten her face up once more. She looked down for a tick, letting out a sound of amusement before meeting his eyes once again.

 "That's sweet, and I'm flattered, really, but I'm afraid I can't."

 Dean's smile fell some in disappointment. "Oh."

 "It's just — your profile says that you’re seeking woman,” she explained, much to Dean's confusion.

 "Oh...?" he trailed off, brows pinched as she started walking backward and away from him.

 "So am I."

 She gave him a wink before turning fully and continuing on. Out of his life.

 Dean could only roll his eyes.

 "Figures," he muttered grumpily to himself as he made his way back to Baby. "All the good ones are either taken or gay."

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Tagging the cheerleading squad I had behind this: @thoughtslikeaminefield​ @fangirlxwritesx67​ @itmighthavebeenintentional​ @there-must-be-a-lock​ @cracksinthewalls​ @rockhoochie​ @mskathywriteswords​ @fookinghelljensensthighs​ @cherry3point14​ @lastactiontricia​ @icemankazansky​ @stusbunker​ @justcallmeasmodeus​

[kendrixtermina]

Interesting details about the 3 houses cast (From dialogue in ‘Heroes’)

The first name Ferdinand’s father is ‘Ludwig’ and he is apparently an insufferable braggart who also said his own name alot

Before moving into her uncle’s castle, Anette spent her early childhood in a small, humble house in the Capital. Gilbert & his wife couldn’t afford domestic servants so she did the chores herself.

Mercedes’ father died in a “conflict in the empire”. Before he died, he taught her mom the secret recipe that Mercedes mentions in the Constance and Dedue supports. A bit of her fatalistic passive attitude early on comes from feeling that she couldn’t change much about her life while she and her mom were being mistreated at the Bartels’ home

Claude has a lot of fun with the mushroom poison.

Despite their student’s glowing opinions, Byleth isn’t actually all that confident about their professor-ing, which is probably not unexpected given how the job was suddenly dumped in their lap.

They’re somewhat uncertain about whether they have real connections with people beyond just the professional level. I guess that’s another parallel to Edelgard.

Someone observed that they look “more like a mercenary and less like a teacher” while they’re fighting.

Apparently their students described them as “a bit eccentric at times”

They seem to like/appreciate it when other ppl can pick up what they’re really feeling/thinking. (I really hope Jeralt knew that) 

 It’s considered rare for Claude and Dimitri to agree on anything

The sad thing is that the trio is noted to be quite effective when they cooperated. I guess we also saw this in Cindered Shadows

There is a hilarious sequence where Byleth is like, “This may call for drastic measures” and everyone starts looking at Claude and correctly assuming that he’s probably already cooking up some sort of crazy plan

 Ferdinand apparently likes the “refined way” that Edelgard swings her axe

Petra considers hunting one of the most important skills you can have, both because you acquire many crucial materials (like leather etc) and because it also hones a lot of skills. Bridgid is very green & plentiful, so most people do some degree of hunting and even the rulers are expected to know it. Someone remarks that it’s probably a culture that places emphasis on self-sufficiency. That’s an interesting way to think about it, especially if you think about Petra’s attitudes, how she approaches even this cobjectively crappy political hostage situation as an opportunity and has a very problem-solvy approach to things. I’d noted that, but I’d never connected it with the hunting thing; I thought it was just Petra being awesome, which it basically still is, but it adds a cool layer to consider how she got this way and how this may be her way to stay close to her homeland’s values even in exile.

“In Brigid, there is a phrase we say. A gray sky will be pierced by the sun. A raging tide will be leading to land. Beyond failure, success is waiting.” 

Hubert seemed to know that he ten elites fought against the godess even pre timeskip. 

He also sees Edelgard as one of the few ppl who really paid attention to him when he was younger -  I guess this goes with this understated complex he has about his looks & personality.

Edelgard likes to just lie around and relax, but only when she’s all alone. At least pre timeskip or pre holy-tomb scene she didn’t think like she could really be herself in the company of others. She does seem to put some deliberate thought into what image to project/embody

Dimitri seems to think that having a crest (and high status) makes it his duty to protect & take care of the people – I guess that’s another way in which he’s completely ruled by obligation. He gets characteristically intense about this. “My life was never mine to begin with, I guess I haven’t the right to throw it away”

the glorious “nice weather” exchange has already been posted. Edelgard (and Lysithea) are the first to clarify that they shouldn’t bring their grudges into this situation since they’re not in Fodlan atm.

Edelgard and Claude are beyond shook when AzureMoon!Dimitri actually agrees. Chill Dimitri is apparently not something they ever imagined. He is obviously the most changed in “his” route, with the other two its no less profound but a lot more subtle. 

Lysithea has an interest in botany (now I really want her to talk plants with Bernie )

Hilda: “I haven’t heard about there being a future me here. She’s probably busy relaxing on a beach or something…”

Mercie and Anette immediately reassured each other that their future selves are probably cute af. Aww

 This is probably unsurprising, but future!Dimitri is still very tormented by his less than stellar actions during and right after the timeskip

Small Dimitri is heartbreakingly surprised to hear that there’s any version of him that’s alive and on the throne, though he hides it because his friends (or at least Annie and Mercie) did not have such doubt

Edelgard decides from the get-go not to concern herself with the future version of her. I get the sense that she really wants to avoid the scenario where she allows her resolve about what she feels absolutely must be done to falter after meeting a regretful future version of herself; I really like this, I know some haters will probably spin this into something about her not caring about the consequences of her actions but it really circles back to how she’s philosophically all about self-determination & can’t let something like a future possibility determine what she does… nor can she back off a sacrifice meant for the greater good just because it might turn out poorly for her (which it does, just not in the CF timeline that this particular future version is from)

 Cut to the future versions who have contrasting ideas about what to do about their tiny selves. Claude thinks they should not risk causing any time paradoxa. Dimitri ponders the thought of warning his younger self (and past!Byleth). Edelgard doesn’t think it would make any difference at all, especially since they would each be showing their tiny self the timeline where they win.

Though I guess one think to consider here is probably that Dimitri would be the most surprised by a sucessful older version of himself

Claude eventuallly agrees, since they were each doing what they thought was best (Claude, too, is sort of uniquely situated to grasp this as the one who can part on good terms with each of the other two in their respective timelines) – though he’s hoping that the time crash will maybe send their younger selves in a different direction (in which you see that this is distinctly VW!Claude & thus a bit more hopeful)

 the others actually agree & it ends with a fun semi-friendly sparring match

 Edelgard wants to show past!Byleth how awesome she’s going to be in the future

it is very in line with my interpretation of her character that she would describe her own disproportional strenght as “hideous”

Claude’s lines are solid gold in this. Like he’s just being aggressive irrevent to bridge the obvious awkwardness “Go on, we’re old dining hall palls!”

This gets Lysithea wondering what might’ve happened if they’d actually graduated as planned. I mean I kind of respect that they DIDNT put in a golden ending but I guess if you want one you can imagine that they got one after returning from Askr I guess.

let’s just hope that “the timeline none of them experienced” doesn’t just turn out to be silver snow lol

[janevx]

you are my strange addiction| choi san

genre: kinda psycho au, sanxreader

summary: you and san were the most adorable and wild couple you can imagine. san love you like hell, but you didn’t know about his secrets.

---

 You couldn’t belive what happend. You couldn’t belive that love of your life lied to you. Few minutes ago your friend text you news that your ex boyfriend was part of mafia and he killed somenone, so now he is in psychiatrist. Now everything makes sense. Why ex?

 About two months ago San came to your house without smile. All strict and serious.

“Y/N we need to talk.”

“San? What’s going on? Did something happend?”

“You know that I love you the most in whole world, right? You are the most precious and important person to me, honey. I will love you until I die. You are my one and only.”

“Okay, but why are you telling me this right now? San, please tell me what’s going on?”

“I need to let go of you. I love you y/n, but we need to break up. It’s all for you.”

 You didn’t notice when tears start running trough your face.

“For me? You love me but break up with me? Break up with me for me? You fuckin liar!” You shouted. “Did you cheated on me? How can break up be for me?”

“You don’t understand this, my love. Remember no matter what I still love you.”

 And with this he left. He left like nothing happend. You trow yourself on bed and cry more. You were with San about 4 years, you really love him and you tought that he loves you too. How can he break up with you like that?

   Now it makes sense, he break up with you for your safety. Maybe he knew that police is about to find out, and he tried to hide you. You miss San like nothing else. You didn’t want anything, you just wanted to be in his arms again and talk about some things you two like. Have deep conversation with him. Cuddle with him and tell about your two problems. But he was gone.

 You can’t count how many nights your cried because of San. Because you miss him.

---------------

 You came back from university and you walked in to your room, but you had call. You didn’t know this phone number, but you decided to answer the call.

“Y/N?”

“Yes, why?”

“I am direcot of psychiatrist. This one when I work is your lovely Choi San. I have question. Do you want to meet with him?”

 It was obvious. You miss him and haven’t seen him in month. You couldn’t miss this chance.

“Of course. I want to!”

“Perfect. Can you be there tommorow? I’m gonna send you our address.”

“Okay, I can.”

“Awesome. See you y/n!”

“See you.”

 You were in shock, because you didn’t expecnt this call. Also, you were very happy that you will be able to see your love.

------------

 You walked out of taxi. You were at the end of South Korea. Day was rainy and gloomy. Not the best day to meet with your San, but you couldn’t change the weather. In front of gate was standing male all in black. His face was straight with 0 emotions. You were a little bit scared, because this place don’t look too friendly.

“Who are you lady?”

“I am y/n. Director called me yesterday and asked if I can came, so here I am.

“You need to wait. I have to check if it’s true.”

 It took few minutes, till you could walked in. When you were inside, next to your side approach some tall guy with a little smile on his face. He leaded you to San’s room. Everyhting there was so scary and you were really scared of San. How they treat him? Do they hurt him? Does he miss you? All questions in your head was messing around with you.

“Don’t be scared! It’s normal place. It’s always look like this.” He smiled a little.

“I mean.. ugh, it’s really sad place.” You looked around. “Do you know something about San?”

“Not really. I only know that they keep him on third floor, where are killers. It’s really strict floor. Also I know that he doesn’t like to talk with us.”

“Ah, I understand.”

“Did you know, that he is mafia member and he kills people?”

“No, I didn’t know anything.”

“You sure? I mean you were in relationship with him.”

“I said no.”

 This guy was really annoying. 

 After few minutes we arrived and stand in front of room number 101. You didn’t know when older man were standing next to you.

“Welcome y/n.”

------------------

 San was siting on the chair and look at man infront him. He didn’t say a single word since he was there. San knows that this can only make his situations look worse. He was silent and calm. Man in front of him spoke.

“I have surprise to you. I bet, that after our surprise you will tell us everything with details San.”

 Young man couldn’t understand what was happening, Surprise? He hide you and no one could tell about you, so it was impossible for them to find you,

----------------

“Welcome y/n.” He smiled. “Are you ready?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Hey, open the door!”

 The door open and you saw face of your lover. He looked so pure and weak at the same time. They told you that you can walked in. Face of San was shocked. He couldn’t belive that he see you. He couldn’t belive that this motherfuckers bringes you to make him scared and talk. San love you and he doesn’t want to get you hurt, because of his mistakes and lifes. He was furious.

“Do you regonize her? y/n. Isn’t she your love?”

“You are fuckin bitch Seo. I swear, if I’ll be free, I’m going to fuckin kill you..” He said clamly, with head down looking at the ground. “Why the fuck do you mix her up in this?” Now San scream.

“Oh, look who finally spoke.” He smiled. “Oh no! We don’t mix her up, we want you to make you happy to finally see her.”

“How the fuck did you find her?” He was screaming and looked really pissed. You have never seen your love like this.

“Stop being so mad and enjoy your time with this adorable person.”

 They left you two alone. San was chained to the chair, so you need to walk closer to him. You were standing there and you couldn’t stop the tears. 

“S-san.” You crouched. “I miss you so much.”

“Did they hurt you? Tell you something? Threaten?”

“No, why?” You looked into his eyes. “San, I really miss you. Why didn’t you tell me something?”

“Because I love you and care too much about you, to let them to hurt you.” He touch your hand. “They take you there to make me talking. Honey, please run away.”

“Why? San I can’t leave you like this!” You screamed. “I love you and I can’t stand that you are hurt and they have you like this.”

“Y/N you really shouldn’t be here.”

“I’m not leaving. I will never let you go.”

 San was extremly pissed, but he didn’t want to show his furious to you. He wanted to kill everyone who ivolved you here. He wanted you to be safe, happy and healtyhy, away from this stuff.

“Okay princess. Let’s do like I say okay?” You two whispered and make this conversation looked like argue.

“But promise me, that you never gonna leave me alone.”

“I swear to god that I will never leave you, but now listen to me.” He smiled softly. “Now you need to run away, because they want me to speak because of you, because they know that you’re important to me. Ask them about toilet, there is window, that should be open. Take taxi, wahtever and come back to home. When you be home ask Seonghwa about safe place, and then I find you honey.”

“I don’t want to leave without you. What if you don’t make it.”

“Y/N please, trust me.”

“Promise me that you come back to me.”

“I promise.” You leaned, and let San to kiss you.”Now please go, and remember that no matter what, I will always love you.”

“No, don’t tell me this. Tell me when I see you at our new place.” You chuckled lighly so he too.

“Okay, see you honey.”

 You did like San told you to. They lead you to toilet and as fast as you can you run trough this window. You run really fast jus to go to Seonghwa.

 It took you some hours to be back at Seoul and at Seonghwa place. He let you walked in and looked at you with really serious eyes.

“I take you to safe place. You can’t take anyhting with you. Throw your phone away and don’t contact anyone, understood?”

“Understood. But what with San?”

“He will run away.” He shrugged.

“Okay.”

  Everything was so messed up lately. Why this couldn’t turn into good time?

“Don’t overthink y/n. He will be by your side really fast.”

“Seonghwa, i can’t. San is my love. You can’t understand this.”

“Of course I can!” He smiled. “You need to rest. Go to sleep when we arrived. I will have to leave, and you don’t open anyone. San propably has own keys.” He smiled more. “And don’t worry too much, he knows what he is doing.”

“If you say so.”

 The road wasn;t too long. Seonghwa left you and gone. You walked in and go straight to bedroom. You needed sleep and get some rest. Bed was really huge. You were that tired that you didn’t even notice when you fall asleep.

 About 2 A.M you woke up, because you want to drink water. A little bit sleepy, you went downstairs to grab glass of water. When you were about to grab glass you could swear to god, that you heard some footsteps. You turned around to check if someone is in, but you didn\t see anything. You thought it was your imagination, because you were still sleepy.

 But suddenly you felt light touch on your shoulder and you were ready to fight, but when you turned around you saw San.

“I told you I come back. You can’t get rid of me that fast.”

“Oh my god, San. Damn, you are here.”

 You two kissed like you have never seen each other and like it was your first time. You could feel longing between you two.

“I miss you y/n. You can’t even imagine.”

“All what’s matter is that you are here with me.”

“I will always be there honey.”

[scullyy]

Birthday Boy

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: It's AJs' birthday! The kids have gathered around for another rockin' hootenanny!

A/N: brUH I’ve been working on this for agesssss and it’s finally dooooneeeeee ~~and it’s still not my best but I TRIED and perfection doesn’t eXIST-~~ it’s a VERY belated birthday gift for @bluebutterfly1 cause she’s been wanting this foREVER. SHE'S AMAZING OKAY-

so yeah this is based off a deleted scene from TFS where it was AJ’s birthday and what not anyways ily and enjoy x

-

It was hard being a kid sometimes, not having the words to describe how you're feeling, not even knowing what it is you are feeling was also a bummer. AJ had hoped he would know when he got older, especially by Clem's age. He would know so many more words and feelings and extra stuff about the world. He had already learned so much just from Aasims' teachings.

But Aasim hadn't taught him why everyone was giving him strange looks this one particular winter morning.

Clem was the first, she wasn't as good of a liar as she thought she was. There was this...odd smile on her face. AJ recognised it as the same smile Louis makes whenever he tries to get out of trouble. Ruby, Violet and Aasim had immediately zoomed off into the school once breakfast was done, only running out to share little whispers with Clementine. Omar was cooking something in his special big pot, more focused than AJ had ever seen, but he refused to tell the kid what it was.

He hadn't even seen Louis! Not even during breakfast! The only other person outside was Willy, still stationed at the watchtower. AJ's curious mind and talkative nature tried to squeeze as much info out of the young boy, but he was able to keep his mouth shut for once.

It all led him to sit beside Clementine in an unusual silence for the two, one that didn't sneak past her. Nothing AJ did - or in this case, didn't - could slip by her radar. "Why the long face kiddo?" Clem bumped her elbow into his shoulder, attempting to steal his attention.

AJ picked at a speck of dry skin on his hand, sporting a very obvious pout. "Did I do something wrong?"

That caught her off guard. Her leg trembled from both the cold and her deeply-bundled nerves. Keeping a secret, especially one she knew AJ was going to love, was tougher than she thought. "What makes you think that?" Her eyes moved rapidly from AJ and the school doors, keeping her crossed fingers hidden beneath her thigh. The other kids better be done soon...

"No one is talking to me. Like when I shot Marlon and everyone got mad at me. I didn't like that and I don't like this." He kicked at the air, his little legs still too short to touch the ground.

"I'm sure everything is fine-"

As her hand reached out to hold him, he pulled himself away, jumping straight to his feet. "Don't say that! I know you're lying!"

His desperation near broke her heart. She could never say no to his cute face, damn him. Heaving a sigh of defeat, she gave in. "Okay fine, follow me." The other kids would surely be pissed at her for letting on too early, but she would rather that than an upset AJ.

And boy did that remove the frown from his face. He bounded around her as she got her crutches in order, kicking up sparkling snow behind him. "Where are we going?"

"The music room-"

The young boy had bolted off before she could finish, reminding her of another young boy she used to know when this all started. "Slow down, kiddo! You're not the one on crutches!"

His eagerness outweighed Clem's command, which was usually his law. He could hear muted talking from within Louis' music room, a few giggles here and there too. He crept closer to the door, utilising his amazing ninja skills. His tiny hand gripped the tinier doorknob, opening the door just a crack to find...huh?

The doorknob was set free from his hand, which had now fallen loosely by his side as he took one quiet step into the room. "What's this?" AJ disturbed the other kids, finding them in compromising positions. Louis was on his very tip-toes, tying some blue tinsel around the fireplace, Aasim and Ruby were lighting the last of the candles as Violet was gently moving the gramophone back into it's original place.

It was a real life record scratch moment.

"Oh shit," Louis broke the silence first, drawing everyone's line of sight to the intruder. He chucked the last of the tinsel up onto the mantle in a careless manner before throwing his hands into the air. "Happy birthday AJ!"

The other kids all dropped what they were doing, raising their hands in line with Louis. "Happy birthday!"

Said child stood there with his mouth hung wide open, taking in the sight. "What?" It was the only word racing through his mind.

Louis kneeled down to his level, sporting one of the biggest smiles AJ had ever seen. "It's your birthday little dude, gotta celebrate it big time."

"My...birthday?" Whatwhatwhatwhatwhat-

Willy tugged on the thick tinsel that ran from the fireplace to Louis' piano. "We managed to scrounge up some decorations from the drama class."

"And we re-used the banner from the party back when these guys got kidnapped." Ruby pointed to the banner above the doorway. The original message 'We're getting them back' had been scribbled out and somehow replaced with 'Happy birthday Alvin Junior'.

AJ spun around, his eyes bouncing between all the bright decor; the flickering candles, the weird fuzzy stuff on the piano, it was all so new. "You did this..for me?"

A slightly puffed Clementine finally made her way into the room, smiling with pure glee at how well her friends decorated the space. She stood beside her boy, trying to decipher what he was feeling. "What do you think AJ?"

"It's awesome!" He threw his hands up into the air.

Louis looked between his friends, all of them sharing evil little smiles. "So, who wants to go first?"

"First in what?" AJ questioned, nearly vibrating at wondering what else they could have planned.

Clementine gently nudged him forward with her crutch, pushing him into the centre of the room. "Gift-giving."

"Gifts?" He continued to question. So much new knowledge in such a short span of time.

Louis dead-panned, merely wanting the festivities to begin. "If you keep asking questions we're going to be here all day. Of course, we got you gifts! It's a thing you give someone to show appreciation or celebrate, and today little dude we're celebrating you."

"I'll go first since my gift is the coolest," Violet was guided over to AJ by Ruby, her smile never wavering. From behind her back she presented a roll up parchment, the corners slightly ripped.

AJ pulled it open and blinked rapidly, taking in the faded faces and text. "Green Day? What's that mean?"

"They were a really cool band, before everything happened," Violet nodded to the outside world. "I figured you could hang it up in your room. If I ever find one of their records, you'll be the first to listen, little man." Slowly guiding her hand to the curve of his shoulder, she gave him a gentle punch.

AJ was still hung up on why a day would be green but appreciated the thought from Violet nonetheless. "They look cool...but what's on their eyes?"

Green Day was a rare source of joy from Violet's sordid childhood, a fleating sense of nostalgia washed over her as she came to realise it'll do the same for him.

Ruby skipped closer to AJ once Violet took a seat on the piano stool, thankful that she got to go next. "I figured since you've become an A+ gardener, you could have this little guy," She brandished from behind her back a small pot, with an even smaller plant inside. "If you take good care of it, he'll grow big and strong."

"Just like me!" AJ was near bursting at the seams; the flower was rather dainty, small and barely purple, yet ready to flourish.

She gently pinched his cheek, gushing openly. "Just like you," Ruby bounced away on her feet, feeling another sense of pride at impressing the tot. She patted Aasim on the back, which turned more into a push when he didn't catch onto her actions. "C'mon, it's your turn now!"

Aasim shuffled over, not bothering to hide his gift. He cleared his throat before passing it to AJ. "Here dude," In his grasp laid a tightly bound book, his name carved into the leather cover. His precious journal that he guarded so dearly the night they first met.

AJ took it gently, treating the book as if it were made of glass. "But it's yours?" He questioned, remembering their first encounter. How times had changed.

Aasim shrugged, unsure of what to say. Dammit, he had this all planned out beforehand! "It's ours. Think of it as 'Ericson's History Volume One', you can finish it off if you like."

"This is cool, I hope I can write as good as you." AJ was so captured by his friend's neat handwriting, he didn't notice Aasims' sincere smile.

"My turn!" Willy yelled, pushing Aasim out of the way in the process. His gift was the only wrapped one, albeit it was wrapped in old textbook pages. A tear in the paper revealed a small piece of wood shining through. "It's a slingshot! Mitch and I used to hit walkers with them all day, now we can!"

AJ hadn't even finished tearing the paper away, but his heart still soared. "That's cool, I wish Mitch was here." He added quietly.

Willy lowered his head, gently fidgeting with his own fingers. "Me too."

Their friend's passing left a forever space in every room, an unnerving emptiness that will never go away.

"Okay Willy, my turn," Omar butted in, wanting to steer the conversation back to the joy. He handed AJ a wooden spoon with a neat little bow wrapped around the handle. "It's my best spoon. You can use it to help me cook dinner tonight."

Louis whipped his head to Omar, shooting daggers from his eyes. "You never let anyone help!"

Omar kept a strong smile as he turned to his friend, unphased. "No, I don't let you help because unlike you the kid actually listens to instructions."

"I listen, just like to take a more...casual approach to cooking." He shrugged, finding a sudden interest in his shoes.

"If by casual you mean undercooking the fish, then sure."

Louis poked his tongue out at his friend before sauntering over to AJ, ready to present the greatest gift of all fucking time. "I figured it's time for an upgrade, say goodbye to that crusty knife," Louis whipped out a small bar stool from behind him, holding it out in front of the boy.  "I present...Stoolio! Get it? Cause it's a stool."

"Nope!" AJ beamed brighter than Clem had ever seen, despite the joke flying way over his head. Louis just had that effect on people. The stool was heavier than it seemed, as it immediately hit the floor when AJ took ahold of it. The faded wood declaring the weapons' age, AJ traced the deep cracks with his fingers. "I think I'll call it CJ, Chairles Junior, like my name."

"That's a much better name. It's strong like you too. It defeats monsters, protects people and looks super cool." He purred, selling the gift as only the best of the best.

AJ looked between his new weapon and Louis, letting the weight of it settle in his small palms. It was stronger than his little knife, though not as easy to hold as his gun. But if Louis could do it, so could he. "Sounds more like you."

Clementine noticed the hitch in Louis' breath, both their hearts thumping from the young boys' sentiment. Louis could feel his heart slip up into his throat, thumping faster than his breathing could keep up. "Uh, wow, thank you. It's both of us."

If only AJ was aware of how much his statement meant to Louis, how he would hold onto it during his weakest hours. If that kid could believe in him, he must be doing something right.

Louis cleared his throat, choking back a quiet sob as his heart settled back down. "There's one final surprise, from all of us." He hopped over to a box beside the ladder, dragging Omar over with him.

The boys reached into the box and began to lift something of great weight, as they struggled to keep a tight grip. "Just don't ask how we got it." Omar heaved, forgetting just how little muscle he truly had.

From the box emeregd something AJ could only imagine in his wildest daydreams. A...giant...Disco Broccoli!

The tot stood in pure disbelief, his jaw hanging wide open. "Is that-"

"Oh hell yeah it is," Louis sneered, maybe just a little more excited than AJ.

The boys set it down besides the dusty fireplace, with Omar wiping his brow. "You like it?"

AJ wandered closer, getting a better look. It was certainly Disco Broccoli, despite there being a hole in his cartoon hand. He had the cool glasses and everything! But he looked...funny. "What...what is it?"

Louis clasped the tots' shoulder, it was always a fun venture showing him something from the old world. Seeing the wonder in his wide eyes, made the hassle Louis went through to get the damn thing worth it. "It's a pinata, bro! You hit it and stuff is supposed to come out."

Omar tapped the side of the pinata, being greeted by a soft echo. "There's nothing in it, but it's still fun to hit."

"You can use Chairles Junior there." Louis was nearly bouncing at the idea as he handed the stool leg to the birthday boy, ready for the absolute carnage he was about to witness.

AJ gripped his new(ish) weapon tightly, eyeing down the funny looking Disco Broccoli. "Awesome."

Clem watched from the piano as AJ tried to lift the stool above his head, nearly tipping over from its' weight. Her thoughts drifted to a dream she had, Lees' words at the forefront of her thoughts. "Wanting to give him a childhood, but knowing what it takes for him to survive."

"You okay, Clem?" Louis bumped his shoulder with hers, breaking her away from her memories.

Nodding slightly, Clementine hoped he couldn't notice the tears in her eyes. "Yeah, thanks for this. It's amazing."

"No problemo, it's good to see him smile."

Clem continued to watch AJ laughing with his friends, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "He's been doing that a lot since we've arrived here."

Louis continued to gaze at her, despite her not noticing. "You both have."

-

Just as it had always been, Clem and AJ sat side by side together on the steps of the courtyard, appreciating the rare beauty of the sunset. The sky a gallery of purely blue and purple. Clem disrupted the silence first, after having spent a lengthy amount of time remembering Rebecca and Alvin, wondering if they would be proud of their young boy. "Can I admit something?"

AJ curiously turned to her, awaiting with an eager tap in his foot.

"I don't actually know if today is your birthday," She pouted. "I know it's at the start of winter, but that's it. There were no calendars, no way to check the date. I just kinda had to guess every year. I also don't know how old you actually are." If she had to guess, either six or seven. Without access to a calendar, all these years trying to keep track of the fleeting months grew tiresome and redundant. Each day was the same, a date made no difference. Hell, she wasn't even sure of her own age anymore.

"Maybe I'm a thousand years old!" He bounced like the truly giddy child he was.

Clem laughed openly into the chilly air. "Sure thing, Grandpa." She pushed at his shoulder before looking back at the sky, knowing deep within her gut that Alvin and Rebecca were smiling with her.

They remained in a balanced silence for a while, until AJ turned back to her. "I don't think it matters. I get bigger and stronger every day, no matter how old I am I'll always protect us."

Clementine wrapped her arm around him, pulling him in close the same way she always had and the same way she always will. "I know you will, forever," She pressed a firm kiss to the top of his head, smiling into his thick hair. "Wanna know what we're having for dinner?"

"What?"

"Beans with apple slices."

"BEANS!"

[trensu]

Episode 45: The One where the Juniors Stick It to the Old People

Still in the demon subdue palace aka wwx's classy cave and wwx is putting ss on the spot and it's great

he's implying that su she is just the distraction or whatever so jgy can enact the Ultimate Evil Master Plan

oooh, i like this idiom he used here

"the mantis is catching the cicada, not aware of the bird behind it."

nice

I LOVE WATCHING WWX BE CLEVER

HE'S SO ATTRACTIVE DOING HIS DETECTIVE WORK

HE JUST BLUFFED HIS WAY INTO MAKING SU SHE REVEAL HIS HAND AND IT WAS AWESOME

he was all, why don't you prove me wrong and play the Totally Not Evil Magic Music you played before?? hm? 

su she ofc didn't play it so wwx pulls out some papers from his robe and is like, that's alright i'll just have lqr read this sheet music i stole from your boss's secret chamber...

and then su she panics and tries to stop him but lwj launches bichen at su she like a boss

The only unbelievable thing here is that su she somehow managed to block bichen and send it right back to lwj tbh 

(thus revealing he still had access to his own spiritual energy lol what a loser)

Lwj catches it gracefully and does a serious pose and side-eyes su she with all the venom he can muster lol

Ewww, su she just spat blood and disrupted the magic circle (bc he knows he’s been caught out)

lwj ofc tries to attack him again but su she is COWARD and teleports himself away

The puppets try to storm the place but wn is on them in an instant

Oh, lwj gets bichen ready to help but wwx grabs him by the arm to stop him

Wwx: it won’t work, don’t bother

Lwj doesn’t look happy about this but he lowers his sword anyway

sect leader yao starts talking but idc what he has to say

Wwx takes the time to spell out that ss is working for jgy and they’re both up to no good

Bc apparently all his detective-y exposition didn’t make it obvious enough

God, it must hurt wwx to be surrounded by idiots all the time...

wn is still fighting off puppets but he lets wwx know that he’s not gonna be able to hold them back for very much longer

The fact that he can hold them back by himself like this at all is amazing tbh

So lsz, being the protective badass sweetie pie that he is, immediately dives in after wn, offering to help!

Jin ling sees him do this and draws his sword to follow behind but jc stops him…

JC IS GIVING JL THE ZIDIAN

Lol Jc’s all like don't lose it! But jin ling doesn’t take it!! 

He actually shoves his way passed jc and throws himself into the throng of puppets with just his father’s sword

Jc is FURIOUS, he’s all, get back here you idiot!! 

Jin ling ofc doesn’t listen

Lsz: you should go back

JL: I won’t!

LSZ AND JL, I LOVE THEM SO. LOOK AT THOSE PRECIOUS BABIES BE BETTER PEOPLE THAN THE OLD FARTS IN THE CAVE

So now we have wn, lsz, and jl fighting off the puppets and protecting everyone

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

WWX TOOK OFF HIS OUTER ROBE AND REVEALED LWJ'S UNDERTHINGS 

wwx slices his fingers on bichen to start writing on lwj's white inner robes that he’s shamelessly wearing and displaying to the world

lwj watches him VERY INTENTLY, LOL

WWX IS USING HIMSELF AS BAIT!! THE MARKINGS ARE GONNA LURE THE PUPPETS TO HIM!!!

AND HANGUANG JUN IS GOING TO BE FIGHTING OFF THE PUPPETS THAT GET NEAR HIM

BC THEY'RE SOULMATES AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER

AND THEY’RE A FANTASTIC TEAM OVERALL

Ljy tries to offer himself up as bait too but wwx is like nope! You all just stay out of our way

Ljy tries to protest but lwj cuts him off with a “listen to him.”

Then our boys share a brief look before throwing themselves into the fray

They look so cool here! Wwx lands steady on his feet with a solid thunk and brings his flute up to his (beautiful) lips

In contrast lwj slides in with sharp glide right next to wwx and gets battle-ready 

LOOK AT MY SUNSHINE BOY PLAY HIS FLUTE LIKE A BOSS

God he looks so good when he’s focused like this

LOOK AT LWJ FIGHT OFF HUNDREDS OF PUPPETS LIKE A BADASS

Lwj is twirling around wwx so fast, fighting back every puppet that comes his way

Wwx is dodging any that get too close but he’s also smoothly bobbing and weaving around lwj’s attacks

THEY WORK SO SEAMLESSLY TOGETHER I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

meanwhile wn helps clear the way for the rest of the cultivators to escape

cut to the cultivators swarmed around the exit of the burial mounds, yao is talking, yuck

sect leaders yao and ouyang are the worst. 

they're all, let's just leave and go to lotus pier to recover!!

jc is like, you want us to leave just like that?? (YOU COWARDLY BASTARDS, he doesn’t say but i know in my heart that he’s screaming that in his head) 

and the other guys are like, yeah, it's not like lwj and wwx are gonna survive that 

jl is like BULLSHIT OFC THEY'LL COME BACK (i love my bratty son)

And Jin Ling is Right BC LWJ IS COMING OUT OF THE WOODS WITH WWX LEANING AGAINST HIM

Wwx looks all weak and worn out. Like, he’s leaning against lwj heavily and lwj is watching him all worriedly

Wwx knees buckle and he goes down, but thankfully since lwj still has his hands on him, he doesn’t fall hard

LSZ RUNS TO THEM AND IS LIKE R U OK???

POOR BABY IS SO WORRIED AND UPSET!!

Lwj still has his eyes glued on wwx but you can tell that he’s starting to feel weary from the battle too

wwx is like we're okay, don’t worry, AND THEN PASSES OUT

which is the EXACT OPPOSITE of okay, omg

Lwj does this little gasp and twitches towards wwx but thankfully lsz is able to catch wwx before he hit the ground

Lsz is frantically calling his name but wwx is completely out of it and all we hear him say in response is a very weak “a-yuan”

At that, lwj’s eyes shift from wwx to lsz and he just stares at him bc here is his son, frantic over wwx, his soulmate, and his son's other father.

And there is his soulmate, murmuring their son’s name

AND NEITHER OF THEM KNOW WHO THEY ARE TO ONE ANOTHER

BC LWJ KEEPS NOT TELLING THEM FOR SOME REASON??:?

cut to some docks on the river

fucking yao and ouyang are running their mouths again

i hate those losers, i'm ignoring what they're saying

oooh, wn is approaching the juniors. lsz specifically. jl gets all on guard.

lol all the other juniors cower away but lsz stands his ground. 

aw ☹️ wn steps back when he sees the kids get all scared

now we're getting some info from lsz that's heavily implying that lsz is actually a-yuan. 

wn is so excited here bc he might have a surviving family member! he's so happy!! It’s adorable!!!

wn: can i call you a-yuan?

lsz: ofc! (WITH THE SWEETEST SMILE!)

wn: a-yuan, how have you all these years?

Lsz: i’ve been living well!

EXCUSE ME A MOMENT. I'M DEF NOT CRYING. JUST GOT SOMETHING IN MY EYE. LIKE A TREE BRANCH OR EMOTIONS OR SMTH. IT'S FINE.

here we learn that lwj started taking care of lsz  since he was about 5yo, and he taught him to play the guqin

WN GIVES HIM A LITTLE PAPER BUTTERFLY

AND HE FLASHES BACK TO A HAND GIVING HIM A PAPER BUTTERFLY AND IT'S SO OBVIOUSLY LWJ'S HAND

wn is all teary-eyed and tries to reach out to touch lsz's face

but jl draws his sword and startles them

lsz gets between them but jl is all like step aside, this is none of your bsns

lsz: jin ling, put your sword away first

jl: get away! *shoves lsz*

He regrets it IMMEDIATELY if the way his jerked forwards to, idk, grab him is anything to go by.

He holds himself back tho bc he’s cursed with pride and general awkwardness towards his crush like his father before him

lol everyone rushes to catch lsz bc lsz is a sweetie-pie and everyone loves him

wn is all it's okay if you're mad at me, i won't fight you but don't hurt lsz!

oyzz: he was caring for you! how could you push him and ignore his kindness?

omg oyzz really does have a sensitive soul. what a sweet boy.

then someone mutters smth like oh, he's so ill-bred and ofc jl hears it

jl: right! i'm just that awful, so what?

now we cut to lwj and wwx who are on one of the boats! 

lwj has his guqin out and is playing magic music for wwx who's got his eyes closed and eyebrows are all pinched together

WWX IS SO BEAUTIFUL, EVEN WHEN HE'S OBVIOUSLY EXHAUSTED AND IN PAIN

lwj can hear the juniors bickering and wwx starts fussing in his sleep muttering jin ling jin ling

lwj: wei ying

and wwx startles awake

wwx: lan zhan, what happened?

lwj: you passed out

wwx: not me. i mean, jin ling?

ofc wwx doesn't care what happened to him, ofc he only cares about what happened to his nephew

lwj doesn't answer but they both hear the bickering on the docks

we cut back to the juniors

jl is like, yeah i'm awful but you can't discipline me!!

wwx: what is going on?

and we watch wwx exit the boat and make his way down the dock to where the juniors are

and i was thoroughly distracted by his slim waist in those swirling black robes and had to rewind to watch it again

jin ling looks like he's about to cry and he has wn at sword point and wwx is all gently telling jin ling to put his sword down

jl: i won't!

wwx: jin ling!

jl: no!

and then he has a meltdown. he's all like, so i'm acting childish, satisfied? AND MY POOR BRATTY SON STARTS SOBBING HIS LITTLE HEART OUT CLUTCHING HIS SWORD 

jl: this is my father's sword, i won't put it down!

AND NOBODY IS GOING TO HIM. NOBODY GETS NEAR HIM OR TRIES TO HUG HIM AS HE CRIES WITH HIS WHOLE BODY, MY POOR LITTLE BOY

SOMEBODY GIVE THIS KID SOME GODDAMN AFFECTION ALREADY

LIKE, EVEN A PAT ON THE SHOULDER OR SOMETHING. ANYTHING!!

all the juniors look down awkwardly but wwx swallows back tears bc he knows that he's partially responsible for the way jin ling hurts rn. even lwj looks sympathetic

(oh, finally remembered that this is a kid in pain, huh, lwj?)

jc hears his nephew crying and comes out of his own boat

jc: a-ling! why are you crying? come here.

and jl goes running to him

and it's kind of sweet how he does it?? idk. 

the lack of hesitation indicates that he sees jc as a safe person to run to and it's sweet, i guess.

jl starts scrubbing his face in his sleeve to get rid of the tears

jc: what's wrong? who made you cry?

i wouldn't say he asks this tenderly but his voice is softer and not nearly as sharp as it usually is when he talks to people

and you KNOW he’s ready and willing to rain hellfire on whoever made his nephew cry

jl doesn't answer but jc glares down the dock where everyone is standing

LOL EVERYONE LOOKS DOWN 

THE JUNIORS, WWX, WN

THEY ALL AVOID JC'S GAZE AND HAVE THE GUILTIEST LOOKS ON THEIR FACES

lwj doesn't look away tho and his face is in its usual neutral state 

but we all know how lwj and jc's relationship is so this is not surprising

then yao has to open his mouth again but what he says doesn't matter, it's how the juniors react that matters

oyzz is all like why are you using that tone? if wwx wanted to hurt us, we wouldn't have made it this far, right?

lsz: oyzz is right!

lol oyzz does this little chin thrust like heck yeah i'm right

LOL jc is like, sect leader ouyang, the mouthy kid is yours, isn't he? he's so good at talking 

I LOVE WHEN JC GETS LIKE THIS. 

HE SAYS IT SO MILDLY AND OUYANG LOOKS PAINED AS HELL

NHS SMIRKS IN THE BACKGROUND

IT'S GREAT

ouyang: zizhen, come here to your father

oyzz: father, you said i shouldn't disturb you

and his dad's all like, get over here right now and oyzz ducks behind lsz and says I WON'T

LOVE THAT KID LOL

his dad proceeds to scold him and nhs is giggling in the background, i LOVE it

some jiang disciple goes up to jc to let him know they're ready to set off to lotus pier

Jc to wwx: you're barefaced enough to go back there?

wwx looks stricken

lwj is watching his face closely, concerned bc his soulmate is hurting (again) bc of jc (again).

we make it to lotus pier by nightfall

Side note to mention that the scenery and music as they travel down the river to lotus pier is really beautiful

Everybody files in but jc stops in front of our boys and wn and doesn't budge until wn says he'll stay behind. 

and even then he doesn't say our boys can come in, he just turns around and walks off

AWWWWWW

LSZ TELLS WN HE'S GOING TO STAY WITH HIM AND KEEP HIM COMPANY

WN IS SO SURPRISED AND HAPPY

AND OUR BOYS ARE WATCHING THIS HAPPEN

WWX IS ALL WIDE-EYED

He makes a move like he's going to join them and lwj stops him

lwj: let them be.

you know lwj, this would be a perfect time TO TELL WWX THAT LSZ IS HIS KID, HIS LITTLE A-YUAN.

but no, instead he just gazes at him soulfully

which, okay, i'm never gonna say no to soulful gazes BUT YOU CAN MULTITASK, CAN'T YOU??

LWJ, YOU CAN LOOK AT HIM WITH YOUR WHOLE  HEART IN YOUR EYES AND TALK AT THE SAME TIME.

Oh, lwj and wwx are at the gates of lotus pier and wwx looks at the sign above the gates 

his eyes get all red-rimmed and you can see his throat bob 

BC HE'S HURTING. 

BC THIS WAS HIS HOME WHERE HIS SISTER AND BROTHER LIVED AND LOVED HIM AND NOW HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY OF THAT

god the way lwj looks at him whenever these moments pop up...he knows exactly when wwx starts hurting inside and he keeps his eyes trained on him the entire time until wwx indicates he's ready to keep moving

we cut to a little moment between lsz and wn where lsz tells us how lwj raised him with a bunch of bunnies and it's adorable

We cut to sword hall where all the cultivators are gathered

jc gets called away and as he's going to tend to whatever it is he sees wwx try to go towards swords hall and glares at him

wwx literally had one foot over the threshold and he awkwardly drags it back out at jc's glare

poor wwx. he just looks awkward all over.

like, he looks down and away and gets kinda fidgety. can't meet jc's eyes. BUT HE STILL MAKES IT LOOK SO PRETTY

lwj on the other hand stares right back at jc, lol, to emphasize I'M NOT INTIMIDATED BY YOU EVEN IF THIS IS YOUR HOME I'M IN RN.

and only after that's, like, telepathically communicated or smth do his eyes flicker over to wwx to see how he's doing.

after jc stalks off, wwx does that cute little nose tap thing he does

wwx: lan zhan, sit down~

and he indicates the stoop with a playful smile

lwj looks at the stoop for like half a second before walking around wwx like NOPE, sitting on stoops is not a thing that hanguang jun does

wwx's mouth curls into a little scowl like fine, be that way.

he sits down on the stoop himself while lwj leans on the pillar next to it, eyes closed and arms crossed and basically looking like a very beautiful and elegant statute

LOLOLOLOL

WWX GOES TO SPRAWL BACK ONTO THE STOOP, RESTING ON ELBOWS 

AND LWJ, WITH HIS EYES STILL CLOSED SAYS: No misbehavior.

HE KNOWS WEI YING SO WELL

wwx looks up at him and pouts but still straightens up so he's sitting properly

wwx starts to sulk and complain about how jc's been gone for so long when jc shows up with a couple of ladies following him

jc pauses to look at our boys and says "come on in" shortly and turns on his heel to enter swords hall

Lol wwx turns to look at lwj with a big smile on his face bc hey, look at that! jc invited them in!!

wwx and lwj just loiter awkwardly near the entrance of sword hall

now we're gonna get a whole bunch of exposition that we don't care much about

blah blah jgy arranged for jgs to die surrounded by prostitutes blah blah

blah blah jgy knowingly married his half-sister blah blah

and throughout all this exposition, wwx is the only one who asks questions and looks for more details.

the rest of them are all willing to take everything at face value which really just explains everything about how they all ended up in this mess, tbh

we also keep getting reaction shots from jin ling and it makes me sad. 

he does the death grip on his sword, and looks shocked and confused at every revelation, poor boy.

and the episode ends as the crowd starts to get riled up over all this brand new information

Which honestly is a relief bc things were getting WAY TOO PLOTTY for my tastes

Return to Masterpost

[kasu-meow]

⭐SE Headcanons - The girls and Scholar at a sleepover party

Hey anon! I’m flattered you thought of me for this, but I actually don’t really take requests, usually. It’s mostly because I’m not sure I could keep up and write every request in a satisfying way, in a short amount of time. I still wrote your request this time though, and I hope you like it :) under the cut because I went a little overboard and it’s about 3500 words.

Ellie:

When Ellie invited you to her sleepover party, she could barely contain her excitement

She was jumping left and right, saying how it would be the most amazing sleepover ever, and the most wicked hangout you’d ever been to

You had no idea what to expect, and prepared yourself for the worst

And you were right to, because as soon as you stepped in her room you were met with absolute chaos

There were only about three or four people, but the combination of yelling and running made your head hurt a little

It was a wonder how the custodians hadn’t caught them yet

You were gaping at the front door without really daring to enter, when Ellie spotted you and dragged you inside

“Scholar, you came!!! What are you doing just standing there? Come in, we’re gonna prank Tegan when he comes back from the bathroom!”

You didn’t have the time to understand what was happening, someone was already shoving you behind the bed as Tyler and Ellie spilled fake blood (and knives) everywhere

As soon as they heard steps, Ellie hid in the closet and Tyler ducked in an angle behind the door, phone already in hand

“Holy sh…”

Tegan made his way to the center of the room and looked at the puddles of blood, clearly confused, as Ellie jumped out of the closet and pretended to fall down on the floor like a corpse

Tegan’s scream echoed throughout the dorms, and Tyler and Ellie couldn’t help but burst out laughing

“I hate you guys” was all Tegan could say

Still pretty confused, you came out of your hiding spot and finally greeted everyone

“Sorry for dragging you into that all of a sudden! But you came at the worst moment ahahah!”

Ellie had approached you, still unable to stay still, and flashed you one of her bright smiles

“S’okay ahah I was just confused, is all. Hey, awesome PJs by the way!”

You had failed to notice it in the confusion before, but Ellie was wearing a Jolteon onesie, Tegan an Umbreon one and Tyler a Flareon one

“Thanks, yours aren’t bad either! Next sleepover, you HAVE to match with us! What’s your favorite Eeveelution?”

The party continued as Ellie tried to assign you your “official Eeveelution,” till you heard footsteps in the hallway

Everyone quietened down, but the footsteps stopped right in front of the door and someone knocked

“Are we expecting someone else?”

“Sssh, be quiet”

“Ms. Collins,” another knock “it’s the custodian. Please open the door.”

“Shoot! Everybody hide!”

You scrambled to hide under the bed as Tegan turned the TV on and Tyler and Ellie cleaned up, almost as if they’d rehearsed this

A second later, Ellie opened the door

“Ms. Collins, you are making a lot of noise, and we’ve received reports of several students who say they heard someone scream in your room.” The custodian said as he looked inside

“Ah, sorry about that! I was just watching a horror movie” Ellie said as she gestured towards the tv, “I promise I’ll keep it down.”

“Very well…” replied the custodian, not fully convinced.

He glanced at Ellie one last time, then made his way back

Ellie closed the door and after waiting a few seconds, everyone came out

“That was close! Had he decided to come in and check, we would’ve been toast!” Tyler said, almost bumping his head crawling out from under the desk

You tried your best to honor your promise to keep it down for the rest of the evening, and soon enough it was time for bed

You were deciding on sleeping arrangements, when Ellie approached you

“Wanna sleep in my bed, Scholar?”

You blushed at the suggestion, but before you could reply, Ellie was already speaking again

“We don’t have enough mattresses so someone has to sleep with me..”

You felt a little stupid for misunderstanding, but you still chuckled and tried to play it off

“Uh, sure! I already had to hide there twice tonight, might as well.”

Ellie giggled as she ducked under the cover, patting the mattress as an invitation

You gladly complied and slid under the covers too, you couldn’t help but feel giddy as you faced Ellie’s smiling face

“You’re a lifesaver, Scholar. If you had said no, I would’ve had to ask one of TnT and I figured you’re much cuter, so I’d rather spoon with you~”

A small blush made its way to her face despite her trying to sound smooth, and if made your face feel hotter, too.

“Smooth” was all you could reply as you shily broke eye contact and moved closer to Ellie

“’Night, Scholar~”

You tried to close your eyes, but with the butterflies you were feeling in your stomach, you weren’t sure you would be getting much sleep that night

“’Night, Ellie…”

Karolina:

Karol is the type of person who doesn’t get along with most people, but keeps her valuable connections very close

She has an image to uphold, and she would rather die than be seen with people who could damage said image

So saying that you were surprised when she invited you to her exclusive sleepover party was an understatement

You thought it might be a prank and she would ridicule you as soon as you entered her room, but you knew Karolina was better than that

You fidgeted for days trying to make up your mind, and you decided you should probably go

Because after being invited by Karolina herself, ditching the sleepover seemed like condemning yourself to your own death

You packed your best PJs, got everything you might have needed and even prepared a snack to bring over, and you made your way to the model’s room

Neha greeted you at the door, and Karol only sent you a glance as an acknowledgment of your presence

You settled down in a small spot near the side of the room, and looked around to see who else Karolina had deemed worthy of her presence

You weren’t surprised to see it was mostly other famous models, designers and businesspeople

You tried to blend in and make some conversation, but you were finding it hard to relate to most of those people

You wondered what you were doing there for the hundredth time that night

You took another look around the room: Neha was busy exchanging sketchbooks with other designers, talking about ideas and giving tips here and there, but Karolina was alone, elegantly sitting with her back against her bed in her red nightgown, sipping on her drink, looking effortlessly mesmerizing

You made your way to where she was sitting, and quietly sat down next to her, subtly sneaking a few glances her way

“If you want something, you should stop looking at me every five seconds and just say it.”

Okay, maybe not so subtly

“I was just wondering why you invited me. I thought you didn’t like me.”

Karolina briefly looked at you, then shifted her gaze to her drink, then back at you. She seemed uncertain, a look she rarely sported, when she softly answered

“I don’t…”

You knew that already, it was something she had made clear plenty of times, so why was she acting so precious about it now?

“…dislike you.”

Oh.

Your heart skipped several beats, and you weren’t quite sure how to reply to that. Karolina didn’t dislike you? Did that mean she-

“Hold it right there. I can see every single thought that’s going through that little brain of yours; I didn’t say I liked you, I just said your presence doesn’t make me want to throw up. That’s all.”

Eh, good enough. You’d take what you could get. But right now, you had something very important to do: tease the hell out of Karolina.

“I think you liiiiiike me~ Karolina, you big softie! I didn’t know you felt that way!”

“Wha- don’t call me that! That’s it, I knew I shouldn’t have invited you! What are those, pajamas? Disgusting.”

She shot you a horrified look, but you could make out a small patch of red making its way to her cheeks

You smiled to yourself, hiding your own blush

You felt like an idiot for falling for Karolina, you thought she hated your guts and a relationship with her looked impossible even in your dreams

However, that night, you definitely made a step in the right way. It’s not like she professed her undying love for you, but at least now, you had a small chance

And that was enough to make your heart flutter

 Neha:

Midterms were drawing closer and closer, but you still felt insecure about some subjects, especially the ones that had never been your strong suit

You and Neha were talking and exchanging notes during lunch when you two came up with the idea of having a sleepover to cram before midterms

Neha offered to have it in her room

You were a little worried about Karolina, but Neha said it would be fine

You decided against inviting many people, considering it wasn’t even your room, and only asked Claire if she wanted to come

The night of the sleepover, you grabbed your books, notes, and some snacks and headed over

Neha opened the door, already in her silk golden nightgown, and greeted you with a soft smile

You made eye contact with Karolina as you were going in, and she shot you a glare

It was obvious she wasn’t enthusiastic at the idea of you being in her room, hanging out with her best friend, but she trusted Neha enough not to object

You were all very diligent for a while, but as everyone got sleepy, the focus started to shift from studying to other things

“Neha~ are those drawings on the closet all yours?”

You recognized the girl who asked as one of the members of the student council

She was snacking and looking through them, while completely ignoring the math problem you were all trying to solve

“Uhm, yes, Anne, but the homework-”

“Wow, Neha! Do you have more drawings we could see?”

Neha looked embarrassed about being the center of attention all of a sudden, but she still pulled out some sketchbooks to show her guests

“I guess it can’t hurt to take a break…”

As the girls fawned over Neha’s designs, even Karolina, who had been mostly indifferent the entire evening, joined the conversation to praise her friend

She even pulled out the department competition’s dress from her closet and showed it to the rest of the girls, proud of how talented her best friend was

Neha, however, was sitting outside of the little group, observing the conversation from the outside

You decided to go sit next to her, for a chance to be let in her inner thoughts

“Whatcha thinking about, Neha?”

“Oh… nothing much, I just… don’t really know what to say in these situations. When everyone’s complimenting me like this. Other than thanks, of course.”

You hummed pensively

It was true that Neha was well-known, despite her business still being fairly new, but you were under the impression that Karolina usually captivated everyone, so Neha might still not have been used to people noticing her designs rather than the model in them

You smiled at her, and let some of your feelings spill out

“Well, I love your designs too, and I think you’re very talented and you deserve all the praise. Even Bersace singled you out during the department competition. You are special Neha, and more and more people are starting to realize that.”

She looked at you, a mix of surprised and flattered

You were starting to worry that you might have overstepped or said something weird, but you were met with one of Neha’s warm smiles

“Thank you, Scholar. I’m happy, really. It means a lot for me, sharing my designs with the world, and the fact that people like them. That you like them.”

You returned her smile, with a fuzzy feeling in your chest

Feeling a surge of bravery, you took her hand in yours and gave it a little squeeze in encouragement

To your surprise, she didn’t reject you, she squeezed back and looked you in the eyes

She got up after a moment, straightening her skirt and tidying up the table where you’d been studying

“Alright,” she declared “break’s over. Who wants some coffee? We still have a lot of subjects to tackle.”

You smiled as the others groaned, and Anne dramatically threw herself on a bed, but you decided to get to work

You went to help Neha with the coffee, while Claire and Karolina decided on the next subjects to revise

You had a long night ahead of you

 Claire:

Claire approached you outside of science class to invite you to a small get together she had been planning

She said she had been thinking of doing something for her friends after the Nakano incident, to take everyone’s minds off it

It was apparently Raquel who suggested they plan a sleepover to relax and recharge before diving back into their regular packed schedules, and Claire was more than happy to plan something for her close friends to have fun together

Claire always managed to warm your heart; how could you refuse?

You were excited at the idea of spending time with the local angel and your other close friends, and you even made cookies to bring to the party

Granted, they weren’t the best cookies out there, but they were made with love and that’s what mattered, right?

…Right?

The night of the party, you packed everything you needed in a small bag, and put your cookies in a special wrap, hoping it’d make them more appealing

You knew you had nothing to worry about, this is Claire we’re talking about, but still… you wanted to make something nice

…And maybe impress her a little bit

You changed into your PJs and made your way to Claire’s door, making sure no one saw you

You quickly ducked into the room, and were greeted by a smiling Claire

She was wearing simple light blue pajamas, but she looked unbelievably cute to you

You were a blushing and stuttering mess as you handed her the cookies you’d made, her overjoyed eyes almost melting you on the spot

“Scholar, you didn’t have to bring anything! That was so nice of you to make something, though. These will be great with the tea Neha and I are going to make.”

You looked over to the Indian girl, and you saw her plug in a portable stove

There were a large variety of tea bags, flavors scattered on a table next to some pots

Everyone picked a flavor following Neha’s and Claire’s recommendations, and soon enough, you found yourself with your own cup in hands

While waiting for the hot liquid to cool down a bit, you let your eyes wander towards the blonde girl who’d been monopolizing your thoughts lately

Claire was putting down her cup after blowing on it a little, to turn and make eye contact with you

She smiled at you and got up, as your heart leaped in your chest

“I almost forgot! Scholar was kind enough to bake us cookies. I’ll put them in a plate here on the table, so help yourselves if you feel hungry.”

As she put the plate down, several people scooched closer to grab some of your cookies, and you saw Claire take some herself

You grew incredibly self-conscious as she took a bite, and you decided that staring at your mug was better than following Claire’s every move like a creep

You shoved some of the cookies in your mouth to keep yourself occupied, and you looked up in surprise

Huh. They weren’t quite as terrible as you remembered

In a moment of bravery, you decided to approach Claire

“Hey Claire…”

“Scholar, hi! Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Ah, yes! Everyone’s really nice, and the tea’s so good. And, uh… did you like the cookies I brought…?”

You looked away in embarrassment; it wasn’t like you to fish for compliments, but you genuinely valued Claire’s opinion and wanted to make sure she didn’t hate them

“I loved them! You are a great cook, Scholar.”

“Oh, thank God! I thought they didn’t come out well, to be honest…”

“Are you joking? They are good, Scholar! Besides, you made them, so I’d have loved them regardless…”

“Oh?”

You looked at Claire, who bit her lip, eyes widening in realization

“I-I meant! I always love everything you do, and…”

Blushing like mad, Claire quickly got up

“I’m going to go prepare the mattresses!”

You followed her with your eyes, your face feeling hotter and hotter as you recalled her words

Love…

You let yourself bask in the idea of your feelings possibly being reciprocated, before you started drinking your tea again

Was it the sweet, honey-like flavor you were tasting that was making your heart warm, or was it the sight of a clumsy blonde scrambling to take out the mattresses, trying to hide her blushing face?

You took another sip to calm your nerves, before you got up and went to help her

 Raquel:

You were pretty nervous at the idea of spending the night with your crush, but knowing Raquel, you went in there thinking she invited lots of people and it wouldn’t be intimate at all

You were wrong

There were five or six people tops, excluding you

You thought maybe the others hadn’t arrived yet, but when Claire warmly greeted you at the door, she said you were the last person they were expecting

“You made it, Scholar!”

Raquel greeted you with a grin, putting her arm around your shoulder

She was wearing a tank top and shorts

While you did imagine that she might wear something like this for bed, it didn’t prepare you for how hot she actually looked

You tried to regain your composure while you were putting down your stuff, and you thankfully succeeded

You looked around the room once again, and you spotted a couple girls from the soccer team, and other students from the Athletics’ Department

You were so concentrated on people watching though, that you didn’t notice Raquel sitting down next to you

She gave you the scare of a lifetime

“Oops, sorry Scholar ahah! What were you thinking about so hard?”

“I was just trying to recognize everyone, I’m a little surprised you didn’t invite the whole soccer team.”

“I actually did, y’know? But some of them had assignments and stuff.”

“Oh.”

You were admittedly a little tense; you weren’t expecting such an intimate situation with your crush and it got you flustered

So your brain may or may not have been forming sentences the way it normally did

“You know Scholar, I was thinking… now’s the perfect chance for you to take up on my offer?”

“Your offer?”

“To get physical~”

You turned your head so fast that you almost hurt yourself, your eyes widening and your heart beating way too fast for your own good

But before you could say anything (not that you would’ve been able to, with how dry your throat was) you were smacked with a pillow, right on your face

As you blinked, trying to understand what just happened, you started to make out Raquel’s triumphant expression

“PILLOW FIGHT!!!” A girl, who you recognized as one of Raquel’s teammates, yelled out after witnessing Raquel’s vicious attack

The battle was intense and harrowing; friendships ended and alliances were born, some people were so scarred they could never recover from the trauma

You and Claire had built a small pillow fort to protect yourselves from the Athletics’ Department students gone feral

As you were about to enter though, Claire got caught in the fire between a basketball girl and a tennis girl

“Why is this happening?! I don’t want to hit anyone!”

“Nooooo, Claire!” You screamed, you had to go save her!

“Ssssh, let her go, Scholar… she’s gone now…”

You turned around to find out that Raquel had crashed your fort and was now hiding with you

“You… you traitor! First me, and now Claire…” you pretended to be upset, it’s at times like these that you regretted not being able to channel fake tears

“Pff, you are a terrible actress, Scholar.” She replied “But I’m sorry for attacking you earlier, really. It’s just that you looked so nervous, y’know? I want you to have fun tonight.”

Your heart skipped a beat after being reminded of the situation you were in earlier, and Raquel’s offer to get physical

Although it turned out, it wasn’t the physical you were thinking of

“You don’t have to be nervous, Scholar. It’s just me.”

Yeah, it was just Raquel

But you smiled at her, ignoring the butterflies, and you hid together in your castle while the outside world went in ruins

This would’ve been hella romantic, you thought, if it wasn’t just a pillow fight

[lizzieparker]

trying to be careful with the words i use || mazzie.

tagging: @doveportmason​ & @lizzieporter​

location: pizza place. 

time frame: april 2.

notes: they were doomed for the start yall. 

Standing in the middle of his room, Mason tried to get himself together. He was always all over the place whenever it came to her, and she knew it. Pulling on a simple t-shirt and then jeans, he knew this would be the best way to unwind after work anyways. He made his way to Pizza Hut and didn't think twice as he stood outside waiting for  Lizzie to approach. This could go good or bad but he was praying that it would go better than terrible and him fumble over his words. Shaking his head, he sat down and waited for her to arrive.

Lizzie knew she shouldn't be doing this, at least not when the morning conversation had gone almost out of hand. She was fine with being friends with Mason, she truly loved it, but the almost factor of it all always made her uneasy. If this was any other person, she wouldn't think twice in jumping into bed, or any other surface, with him, but you don't do that to your best friend. Not with her ex-boyfriend. It was why she was so keen into meeting him in public, just in case. After a quick shower and throwing some jeans and a jacket, Lizzie made her way to the Pizza Hut and couldn't help but smile when she saw him. Mason was too cute, honestly. Grinning, she pat his head on the way to sitting in front of him. "Hope you didn't wait for me for too long!"

Whenever Lizzie walked in, Mason smiled up at her until she sat down and he  took in the view that was in front of him.  God he couldn't do that. Not to Eloise. Though, the idea was tempting because she was tempting and let's be real. The talk of top and bottom really had him slightly or very turned on. Shaking his head of his thoughts, he started to take in the view and chuckled a  little at her comment. "I've had  a drink refill three times now, Lizzie. I was about to leave, thought you were standing me up!" He chuckled then pressed his lips  together. "It's good to see you."

Lizzie faked to be completely shook at his words, not being able to hide the smile for too long. "You would never leave!"  It was so hard to not be too flirty, considering she was still hang up on their conversation from earlier, specially when she kept picturing him under her, over and over again. "It's good to see you too" Her smile soften as she reached for his hand above the table, giving it a littl squeeze. "I missed you! I want to hear everything you have been up to!"

Chuckling, he knew that she was right. He would never leave, just because he was himself and she was her and he cared about her. It wasn't in his blood - so to speak.  "I wouldn't. I adore you more than that!" He teased, then ran his free hand through his hair for a second. Squeezing hers back, he let their hands linger a while before he chewed on the inside of his lip in thought. damn it stop looking at me like that. "Well. Work. Work and more work. Oh, and some work!  I'm boring, honestly. What about you? Catch me up."

Lizzie smiled brightly at him, pleased with the comment. It was nice to know he really care for her enough to not leave just like that. "And I adore you right back!" She let her hand on his for a while, biting her lower lip as she looked at him talk. God, it was the same battle over and over again. "Well if you say it like that ot course it's going to be boring!" When the waiter approached, Lizzie let go of his hand, turning to order her pizza order and waiting until he did the same. "I have been working too but for me it's super fan. Did I told you the other day that I had to carry twins out of a second floor? It was awesome, if I say so myself "

Mason laughed to himself at her comment back and just stared over at her for a moment. She was something to see, and that was bad for business for Mason. "I would hope so," he admitted as he looked over at her. Letting out a huff of a breath, he ordered  after her but paid close attention to what she picked to have. Why couldn't he just shake her? It was like a bad habit. Bad drug. He didn't know why he couldn't get past her. "You didn't tell me that but look at  you being the hero. What am I going to do to compare to someone like you, huh?" He  teased, all while being  rather  serious.

Talking about work did make her feel a little more at ease, more in her element. "You are a teacher! That makes you a hero just like me. Just not in the action field but any less heroic" And she meant it. Teachers were awesome, if they were nice and patient and knowing Mason, she knew he was. Lizzie had to stop her mind from wondering how hot he probably looked with kids around him and, not for the first time in her life, she was glad to not be able to have a boner. "Talking about teachers, we had a whole clas at the station the other day. I think we are getting popular with the schools in the city"

Whenever she called him a hero, he smiled and just took in the moment of it all. It was calm, everything was calm and he wasn't thinking too much about anything right then. She was talking about stuff with work and he felt like it was totally fine. Right? "Hey, I do what I can to make sure that the kids totally have something to look forward to and I think that I do a pretty good job, anyways," he laughed and then he took his drink whenever it was in front of him and took a sip. "Really?" He asked, smiling as he looked over at her and took in a breath. "That's really cool. What do you guys let them do whenever they come there? Like, do you let them get on the trucks - rigs whatever you call them?"

"I know you do" The itching of holding his hand again was strong, but Lizzie was happily saved by their drinks arriving. She was quick in taking a sip of her Coca Cola, looking at him with a smile. "Well, yeah. We let them see the insides of the trucks and Matt showes them his rabbit song and usually I give a little speech with the other girls, you know? About how we can be firefighters too if we eat our vegetables and grow up super strong" It was always her favorite part, cause there were always girls that wanted to know more. She always had a feast answering all their questions. "Oh! I almost forgot!" Her hands moved to her bag, taking out the little present she bought for him and passing it. "I know you know what it is, but I still kinda wanted to wrap it"

Mason couldn't help but be entertained by how this woman was. She was beautiful, smart. She was literally everything that he needed out of the world and yet he couldn't have her. He wasn't allowed to have her and it drove him insane. Shaking his thoughts, he took in a breath and just tried to focus on the drink in front of him. "You know, I gotta admit that I love the way that you get so into it. I think that's something that is beautiful. Not many people can say that they are or even touch the feeling that you have right now," he admitted and smiled to himself. Whenever she grabbed out his present, he took it and laughed as he opened it and gave her the best fake gasp he could but in all honesty he couldn't love it more than he did. "Thank you so much. It's perfect, honestly," he admitted and then he gently squeezed her hand again as a thank you. "Sounds like you've had a busy day, huh?"

"It wasn't easy, to get here" Everyone had a family outside of their work, but for Lizzie, it was only the station. Of coursse she had her parents and her siblings, but she had never felt more at home than when she was at work, more complete. Seeing him unwrap his gift was lovely and she couldn't help but stare at him, feeling her heart give a little jump whenever their eyes met for a second. "You are the best uncle, it was only fitting" One of her fingers moved around his hand, rubbing it lightly, even when she was rolling her eyes. "It's not that hard to wrap a present"

"I know it wasn't, I'm sure," he smiled over at her and he couldn't help but look at her. She was beautiful. It was almost upsetting how much as he figured that it wouldn't be so bad  whenever they were looking at each other but he couldn't help it. "Thank you," he spoke softly and smirked over at her. His hand stayed in hers and he put the shirt down with his other before he reached over the counter, holding her other hand in his carefully. "Sometimes I wish things between us weren't so complicated, honestly."

Just like his, her smile softened and she shook her head, resting importance to the gift and letting him reach for her free hand. It was like even their hands fit together, even for a moment. They weren't so in sync however, when he spoke again, and the smile disappeared completely out of his face. "Mason..." She wasn't sure of what to say, but the pizza arrived and she took the opportunity to move her hands away from him, like they were basically burning her. "I'm starving" Was it a cheap solution? Yes, but it was the only one she could think about right there.

Whenever he went to speak again, he knew that she wasn't sure what to say either. It was all complicated. He moved his hands once the pizza arrived and he took a slice out, nodding to himself but also to answer her quickly. "I'm starving, too. I've been hungry all day and this totally hits the spot," he said, now with his eyes focusing on the food in front of him over anything else, even Lizzie.

She tried to give him a quick smile before taking her own slide of pizza, knowing that neither of them could come back to their safe and happy conversation. "Yeah, me too" Even when Lizzie tried to sound cheerful, it was obvious she wasn't too happy. Still, she ate her pizza without another word, trying her best to look anywhere else but the guy in front of her.

Looking down, he sighed and then he looked back up at her. "If you want to come over and we can totally hang out, you can. Just hang out, obviously," he spoke softly. He really meant it, seeing if they could hang out in private could be a good thing as friends but he didn't know if she'd want to. "You can play with Benji. He misses you."

Lizzie really consider it for a moment. They could go to his place and try this, but she knew how it was going to end up. It didn't involve clothes. "I don't think I should" She could make up some weak excuse but he had been honest with her and she guessed her deserved the same. "We are still us and you said the thing... It's not a good idea”

"Alright. Nevermind that then," he sighed, chewing on the inside of his mouth in thought. He was so annoyed, because he said it and he shouldn't have. He was being childish and it was something that could never happen. He knew that. "Right. Well, I should probably go. I mean, I think that eventually we have to get past it. If we're ever going to be friends."

Lizzie passed a hand over her hair, putting it all on one side and looking at him. "I don't want you to leave" Yet, they both knew it was the smart decision. "Maybe we should go out in a group? And then just... Get comfortable with the friends thing again. No touching and stuff"

She said she didn't want him to leave and he couldn't manage to move from his spot. She didn't want something. He listened. "Yeah, I mean. I'm okay with that. That sounds like something that could be a really good plan, if you ask me," he admitted, smiling over at her. "Sorry, I wasn't trying to make this bad."

Lizzie quickly shook her head, trying her best to manage a smile. "You didn't. You can be honest, it's only fair" She shrugged lightly. "I guess I'm just... Not ready for it. I think I didn't wanna talk about it now, but that is not your fault. This is all on me and I know that"

"Stop. It's not your fault, Lizzie. It's not that big of a deal. I know better than to ever let my wall down enough to like someone so I just ignore doing that until I know it'll be safe," he admitted, shrugging a little. "We're gonna be fine."

That sounded like a lie, like a very big lie that they were both trying to hold together, so Lizzie didn't point it. "Okay then" Her eyes went back to the left of her pizza, nodding. "We will be fine. Always fine"